#the crux of divorce arc imo is that. dean actually did want to work things out but. he was dealing w/ so many unprocessed emotions
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thinking abt plot points for my divorce arc fic and just. the deliciousness of dean and cas in a Situation where they definitely need to work together and cas's first thought immediately is, "how can i go off on my own and fix this problem for us" and dean catching him getting ready to take off (without telling anyone!!!!) like !! are u fucking serious rn. like yea yea "i left but you didn't stop me" ok ok but what about, "you keep leaving over and over which sends the message that you don't really want to be here" (even if that's not the intended message) and he's just honoring your (percieved) wishes by letting you go, even if it kills him inside to see you leave (again. and again. and again.)
#the crux of divorce arc imo is that. dean actually did want to work things out but. he was dealing w/ so many unprocessed emotions#from mary's death to losing jack to finding out chuck had been /controlling their whole lives/#like the guy just needed some space to process. and then cas decides to LEAVE. again.#and that pressed at the bruise that is dean's abandonment issues. but he also is just. Not going to ask him to stay#if he thinks this is what cas really wants#and so he's hurt by realizing cas wants to leave (that's not what cas Really Wants either) so he protects his soft underbelly in that momen#lets himself harden and get angry and be like fine if that's what you want go#and the tragedy of it all is the miscommunication. dean wanting cas so desperately to stay (of course i wanted you to stay!!)#and work things out. and cas so desperately wanting to be /asked/ to stay. wanting to get past this.#dean thinks cas really wants to leave / doesn't care to stick around. cas thinks dean doesn't care enough anymore to ask him to stay.#and they're both wrong your honor !!!!#divorce arc#cas in the wind#of course i wanted you to stay
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