#the coloring took hours though but it was super therapeutic and fun | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

power-chords · 3 years ago

Text

Post-trip round-up, integration, thoughts (cut for length & some Heavy Shit)

WOW I needed that and I am so glad I realized I needed that. It has been well over ten years since I last took LSD, and my reluctance to indulge in psychedelics again was rooted in a long and complicated history that I don't really need to hash out here, but doing a mild dose of mushrooms last weekend gave me the confidence and conviction that I was ready.

Would it have been wiser to take a less bonkers dose for the first time in a decade plus? Probably! Do I regret a single moment of it? Not a whit! It's tough to overstate just how powerful, therapeutic, and restorative a good acid trip is, even an occasionally intense, uncomfortable one. I do not recommend eating multiple tabs of extremely good blotter on your first rodeo, but Adam's even more of a veteran psychonaut than I am, so I was 1000% well cared for, totally safe, and in a comfortable, familiar environment. In that setting, and in a positive frame of mind, acid is not going to throw anything at you that you are not equipped to handle. I would love to make this an annual or biannual thing.

The cool, funny, wacky delightful stuff:

Put it under my tongue at 10 AM-ish. Went to go listen to some music and doodle until it kicked in. I forgot that the come-up is like, do not make any fucking plans involving hand-eye coordination LMAO. I was trying to doodle Bowery Ballroom in an old sketchbook, and that devolved quickly. The markers were old so some of the caps were really stuck on there, and I wound up devolving into fits of laughter from the absurdity of pulling the caps off with my teeth.

Ink stains on my hands started writhing and trailing and were very cool. That was the first thing I noticed. I got very sad that I stopped drawing and making art, which was something I did all my life and almost went to school for but stopped doing as an adult. And then I realized I could start drawing again any time if I wanted to, and I didn't have to be GOOD at it or a proper artist for it to be worthwhile and fun. Felt immediately happy again.

Adam decided to watch Lethal Weapon???? I was like, Don't Like That. Even though he had headphones on and I couldn't hear anything. I am ambivalent about screens at best when I'm tripping, and at worst I don't even want to be in the same room with them. Guns and violence seemed comically, brutally stupid. Turned my back to the TV and continued drawing and writing until I could no longer hold a pen. Eventually Adam got on my wavelength and was like yeah, this is too much! (He took like, twice the dose that I did. I have no idea how he was even able to talk to me, but he managed!)

Felt the need to message Liana while peaking, picked up my phone, and saw that she had already sent me this:

I thought that was HILARIOUS (tbh it actually was, and it was not just the acid talking)

For the first few hours of teeth-grinding, reality-shearing intensity, Adam and I mostly lounged in bed with the shades pulled all the way up and the window open, cuddling and petting Ernie. Fantastic bonding experience for the whole fam.

Looking at every surface in the apartment became like looking at a stained glass ceiling, or an infinite mandala, or the muddied rainbows in oil-slicked puddles. It looked like Ernie's fur was breathing and someone had colored all over the white parts of him with a highlighter. Adam agreed with this assessment. Formica on the kitchen counters was bananas. So were the trees outside, rippling like celluloid and brighter green than I had ever seen them.

The two of us spent a good 15 minutes doubled over with laughter because Adam suggested a contraption for funneling Fancy Feast directly into Ernie's mouth, kind of like shotgunning a beer

Adam: "I can't believe I used to to this and get on the subway and try to do things with people." Me: "What? How did you even figure out how to get from Point A to Point B?" Adam: "I mean, we didn't, really. We usually got lost. It was fine, though." Truly, it's about the friends you make along the way!

The second half of the trip, when things are starting to mellow out a bit, is when you become a real rock star. I went outside for a walk around the neighborhood, and to sit in the park with my headphones on while watching kids play on the playground, and it was ECSTATIC. I was just overjoyed. My face still hurts from smiling.

Forgot that I needed money to realize my goal of obtaining a popsicle, so I had to detour back into the apartment and explain all of this to my husband before resuming the popsicle quest. He thought it was very funny, but sympathized.

Fresh air, popsicles and San Pellegrino on acid. On another level! 100/10.

Bathrooms still universally suck, LOL. -10/10. Not a fan of that bathroom while tripping face! Every time I had to pee it was like WELL here we go again into the Pink Squirming Hell Chamber (I am making this sound like more of a big deal than it actually was)

15 HOURS. 15 HOURS Jesus Christ lmao I did not stop seeing weird shit on screens and surfaces until like 1 AM. And even then, if I stared long enough, funky colors and patterns would re-emerge. It's a commitment. I feel happy and refreshed, but also totally exhausted. Definitely have to budget a full weekend of No Plans for any future trips.

The Heavy Shit:

There is some Cronenberg-level body horror right before the visuals get super rainbow-stained and stereotypically psychedelic, which sounds bad, but I promise it isn't. It's watching the veins pulse under your skin and change into very saturated colors, pores and hair and scars become very defined and wiggly, and as someone who has so much bodily anxiety related to my alopecia/IBS, it was weirdly... freeing? You get to experience all this stuff in an entirely new frame of mind, shedding judgment and old thought ruts. I remember thinking, "I do not need to feel shame about my body," and letting go of so much baggage.

At some point mid-afternoon I decided to retrieve my phone from the drawer again, and saw that I had a missed call and a voicemail from my dad. I decided to play it back, and he was just phoning to tell me that he was listening to a live version of "Sally Simpson" and Keith was doing this thing where he wasn't even touching the cymbals, and had I listened to that specific performance before and noticed the same thing, and wasn't he truly the greatest drummer that ever lived? "Anyway, no need to call me back, just wanted to let you know. I love my bubbie!" (His term of endearment for me.) And I went to go sit in bed and weep for a straight 15 minutes, the most cleansing, purging cry you could possibly imagine, while Adam hugged me and rubbed my back. I was overwhelmed, overcome by this feeling of cosmic Love and Connection with my family and my husband and all of my friends.

I had been sitting on and burying so much fear and distress from the past 18 months, the chronic, low-grade trauma that was worrying if COVID was going to kill my father, my best friend and closest confidante and the one person on earth who I feel truly Gets Me on a spiritual level, and all of that came out. Fully processed and released every ounce of grief. What replaced it was the absolute, unshakable faith that no matter what happens — including my greatest fear, which is inevitable, no matter how far off it may be — he will always be with me, and a part of me, in the music we both love, and I will never, ever lose that.

17 notes · View notes

curlythenord · 5 years ago

Text

How It Began

Hey, so this is new, and weird. But I have no one to talk to about this to without annoying them, and this is basically my new and only hobby. And I like it a lot. And most of us are stuck inside anyways so why not?

Skyrim is quite a few years old, so maybe some of you have wisdom to give. Or not, and you could just hear about my faliures/achievements and laugh. Either way, this feels therapeutic in nature, and puts two things I love together. Writing and... well, Skyrim.

So, three or four weeks into quarantine, and I was already pretty out of it. I didn’t have any solid hobbies to pick from and I was waiting on amazon book deliveries. Then, Jenna Marbles posted her video “A Tour of My House In Elder Scrolls Online” and I watched it and I really liked it. She mentioned how much she liked it many times before and something about the fantasy and quests just struck a cord in my bored little heart.

It’s like the attraction of Animal Crossing that a lot of us are having, except it’s with dragons and magic and swords. Both are still very valid.

That afternoon I downloaded Blades on my phone and played for literal hours. Something about swinging a sword and killing trolls and monsters really got to me. I wasn’t a fan of building the town and upgrading the blacksmithy but otherwise I enjoyed it. Then on Easter I kinda browsed through amazon, wondering if I could buy the game right now because of quarantine and all that. We have a ps4 at home, it’s my little brothers. I found a copy of the 2016 beautified version on Amazon, and then he went and found it on the playstation store for way less.

Soon enough I caved to my desires and I bought it. And I was immediately obssessed. I spent like an hour JUST creating my character. I wanted her face paint to be just right and her eye color was so hard to pick because I kept getting getting stuck between this hella striking blue and this really cool dark golden/hazel color. (I decided on golden) I chose Nord after debating about it for awhile, and i’m still not regretting the decision. She has really dark black hair and dope ass war paint on her eyes. I know Breton was probsbly the better choice but the Nord character hasn’t been an issue at all. I do always forget to use her war cry thougj. I think it’s because I can only use it once a day (in-game) so it makes me scared to use it. Even though days are just around 20-30 minutes long without fast travel.

Her name is Toril, which means “thunder”, and I know shes my avatar and everything but like... she’s so cool.

I chose the Warrior stone, because I genuinely just wanted to fuck shit up with a Sword. I always thought I was naturally super bad at console gaming becuase I tried playing COD before and I was terrible. Like really bad. Like propably shot myself more in the foot than I shot anyone else bad. But with Skyrim? I keep getting better each time I play. And my attack strategies are getting so much better.

My usual way to fight is a shield and a one-handed weapon. Two-handed is just too bulky and I like swords and the protection of shields. Also it just drains stamina so fast and I don’t like that. At this point I just carry Two handed weapons incase an opponent is Really hard to kill without it. I also do magic-wielding on left hand (usually restoration spells) and a one handed weapon on right. It’s prefect for combat with slow but really damaging enemies, like dragons or trolls that you can back away from.

Recently, I began dual wielding and it’s honestly so fun. I just hate how much damage I take when I do it against a group of bandits though, so I keep moving away to heal or take potions, but it’s such a fun strategy to use with dragons when they land or just against one opponent.

Anyway, the game is amazing, the characters are fun and weird and yea they’re fake but the storylines are so interesting. I decided to go with the imperial gaurd in the beginning, so I went to Riverwood, and then eventually took main residence at Whiterun. I was a little slow on joining the companions, so I used to just stay at the inn before I lived with them, but a couple days ago I saved up enough to buy the Breezehome. Both a good and bad idea because I still go back to Whiterun a lot, but my quests are now taking me farther and farther away and now I can’t really pop back in whenever I need to store an unneccesary weapon or some dragon bones.

I also hardly let myself fast travel because I really like the game for the exploring aspect. Even though the foxes have given me jumpscares multiple times with their guttural panting.

So yea. After maybe two weeks of playing I’m at level 20, and I’m guessing I’ve spent over 30 hours on the game. I play a little bit each day, but my sessions are usually 2-4 hours long and happen in the afternoon, and if I get on after my brother at 12 am i’ll usually play until 2 before I get too tired. I’ve only got like 13% done though, or at least only 13% of the achievements. My highest acheivement right now is doing alchemy though so I’m not doing great.

I’ve been focusing on the quest with Delphine and Esbern recently, and I’m at the point where I just spoke to the dragon master/teacher of the Greybeards, then spoke to Arngeir about going to Windhelm/Winterhold. I figured I might as well finally visit the college there because I wanted to improve some magicka skills without using my perks. It’s weird though, because as soon as I got back to Whiterun and then headed out to go to Windhelm, I got absolutely raided by dragon attacks.

First, one appeared outside of Whiterun, and me being the pussy I am (after getting my head bit off Multiple times) just shot arrows at it from a distance as the soldiers dealt with it, and then ran over when it was dead to absorb the soul. Then when I was past the farms and the guards tower next to Whiterun, another dragon appeared. I used the Whirlwind sprint to stay next to it’s wing to keep it from biting my damn head off, then used some restoration spells when it was in the air, and dual wielded (when I could attack it) with the Dawnbreaker and this enchanted sword I found at the Sky Haven Temple that deals extra damage when attacking dragons. Absorbed that soul and headed on up to the snowy mountainous area that was on the way to Windhelm.

After dealing with a couple asshole white bears and some whisps, I hear a dragon and absolutely lose it. Why was I suddenly getting bombarded?? I decided to sneak on this one, and got my bow and arrow out. Eventually I got close enough to see not one, but TWO goddamn dragons, before realizing it was Alduin raising one to life (and realized he was salty because I was trying to destroy him by getting the Elder Scroll). Eventually I managed to kill it, still using Whirlwind sprint, healing spells, and dual-wielding. Plus some potions too.

I had to try a couple times for each of these by the way. Even with the second dragon I kept forgetting to save once I was a mildly-annoying-distance-to-repeatedly-walk away from Whiterun, which sucked but it’s whatever. I learned my lesson though and started remembering to save.

I got to Windhelm, which was weird territory because it’s run by Stormcloaks, and had to physically restrain myself from pummeling this drunk guy while he talked down to a Dark Elf and accused her of being a spy because she wasn’t a Nord. Also sometimes guards that aren’t from Whiterun will call me a thief (I unnsuccesfully tried to help out the guy who told me about Esbern’s hideout back in Riften) and it’s a lil annoying because I try really hard to make my character a decently good person. Sucks though because one of the achievements is joining the Thieves Guild and though I don’t necessarily want to do that, I’m gonna eventually unless I create a new character, which I don’t wanna do yet because I like mine too much.

Anyways this is already really long. I’m making another post to talk about my current opinion on choosing between Imperials and the Stormcloaks. If you have any tips, or questions, comment them! Or send me an anon, either is fine. I could literally rave about Skyrim for hours, as you have probably seen. Thanks for reading!

#skyrim #elder scrolls #console #fantasy #bloggin #experience #stayhome #jenna marbles #ps4 #this is new #video games #playthrough ?

8 notes · View notes

news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Woman's colorful L.A. loft is a total unicorn dream

One California woman is living out all your wildest unicorn and mermaid fantasies by turning her downtown Los Angeles apartment into a rainbow, bubblegum dream.

Social media queen, decor designer, and the brain behind Studio Mucci, Amina Mucciolo lives her life in color. From her hair, to her clothes, to her bubbly personality, she lives her life on full volume. In order to bring more color and vibrancy into her life, Mucciolo and her husband, Salvatore, transformed their 650-square-foot apartment into what she calls "Cloudland," a total unicorn paradise.

Mucciolo's downtown L.A. apartment

Image: studio mucci

"Wherever I live, I believe, should be a reflection of myself," Mucciolo said of her home. "I want to live somewhere where I feel inspired and happy because I’m an artist, and I work from home a lot."

SEE ALSO: Get ready to obsess over unicorn-themed everything

When it comes to the inspiration for her pastel pad, she was influenced by all things that come with her favorite season.

“My initial big inspiration was spring because spring is my favorite season," she said. "There’s something really special about spring. The holidays in spring, all the pastel colors. I just wanted it to feel like spring all year long.”

Mucciolo's Washi tape-customized kitchen

Image: studio mucci

With the exception of her sofa, everything in her home is customized according to her chromatic vision. With the help of Salvatore and a few great and very patient friends, she created about 90% of her decor. One of the major projects she took on became the focal point of her living room. She had seen giant flower wall hangings at a few parties and wondered why no one was putting the fixture in their homes. So hundreds of silk flowers and a ton of hot glue later, the floral Instagram-worthy backdrop became the center of her home.

Mucciolo in front of her homemade flower wall

Image: studio mucci

Mucciolo's rainbow theme doesn't stop in the living room. Her kitchen cabinets, which took 10 painstakingly long hours to decorate, are covered in brightly colored Washi tape. She doesn't mind the time it takes though. Mucciolo explained that she lives with OCD, and detailed projects are incredibly therapeutic for her.

Image: studio mucci

Paper cranes hanging from Mucciolo's ceiling

Image: studio mucci

"All of these [projects] aren't super fast things, but that's what I'm into," she explains. "Creating helps ease my mind, and has saved my life."

Mucciolo uses paint to create different moods throughout the rooms in her loft. Her bedroom, for example, is inspired by elements of nature, including crystal, marble, and agate, and features a more muted palette to capture a soothing mood.

Mucciolo's "cave" bedroom

Image: studio mucci

“There’s no natural light in the bedroom, which is usually a problem, but I wanted to make it a real strength," Micciolo said. She used the "cave-like" feel of the room to channel the natural elements she was originally influenced by into a dreamy den.

Image: studio mucci

Mucciolo's wall of fun, novelty bags

Image: studio mucci

Her favorite feature of her apartment, though, is a splatter paint rainbow wall, originally born from a mistake. She knew she wanted a very strong rainbow statement somewhere in her home, so she, Salvatore, and her friend painted one on her wall. Only the feature ended up looking like stripes instead of the big, beautiful rainbow she hoped for.

"I said 'Sorry guys, I hate this. I'm going to throw some paint on it.'" So she used the leftover paint to splatter the wall and create the rainbow statement she dreamed of having. Although the flower wall is what people love the most about her home, she said she feels the best when she looks at her mistake-turned-masterpiece.

The splatter wall

Image: studio mucci

If you're wondering what her husband thinks of of the decor, it sounds like he's pretty into it.

"My husband is also a unicorn. We’re business partners in Studio Mucci, so once that really started I think he just knew that that was what his life was gonna look like. I think it makes him happy. His style is a little more minimalist, so if he had his way things would be slightly more minimal. But he helps me edit when I want to go farther.”

When asked what one word describes her home, Mucciolo said "celebration."

"That’s the business that I’m in," she said. "Thats pretty much how I live my life. The theme of my life is celebration. It’s a reminder to celebrate every moment. I do all of this for myself because it makes me and my husband happy. But I really do this to help inspire other people, and help other people know they can be and do whatever the hell they want. I want to inspire people to be more of themselves."

Well, we definitely feel inspired by this joyous, celebratory aesthetic, and are furiously looking through her Instagram for ideas. Anyone want to help us build our own flower wall?

WATCH: This hair dye changes color based on your environment

#_author:Samantha Scelzo #_uuid:357db62b-2ade-3f00-8496-5e0a1a81a51e #_lmsid:a0Vd000000DTrEpEAL #_revsp:news.mashable

1 note · View note

redefinethegrind · 6 years ago

Text

Alcohol

I stopped drinking again. This is the third time or so I’ve truly decided to be done with alcohol. Otherwise, I have made several feeble and half-hearted attempts in a not so serious fashion. Since I started drinking at age 21 I have had a strange relationship with the substance. I first tried drinking to see what the effects were like. I was just curious as to what it would feel like to be drunk because other people seemed to enjoy it so much. I bought a bottle of green apple Pucker because I thought it would taste like candy, and I drank it all in my first apartment. I remember spending a lot of time in the bathroom on that night for some reason. I’m not sure if I threw up or not, I just have memories of sitting in the bathroom.

From that night forth, I had developed a taste for being intoxicated in general. I had, prior to this, experimented with over-the-counter drugs in super-therapeutic quantities. I noticed that I like the way Benadryl made me sleep and went on to use it as a sleep aide for much of my life. I found myself even taking Benadryl before work when I was a sales associate at Radioshack. I reasoned, “it makes me stupid, so I can talk to the customers on their level.” It was disgusting and strange. I had also used dextromethorphan as a cheap high but never regularly.

I went on from that first night of drinking to take up drinking on the occasional weekend for fun. I would not drink on work nights and only on weekends at that point. It seemed like typical binge-drinking behavior for a person of my age. I did notice, however, early on that I had emphasis on chugging alcohol quickly and just getting more drinks in me than the next person. I was into the feeling of being drunk, not the experience of socializing. Being drunk made reality more tolerable to some degree. It made the mundane more interesting to me.

I continued drinking occasionally until years later when it gradually became a daily norm. Drinking had been something that I used to augment my reality initially, it ended up being something I would use to just turn reality off. When things got hard I would binge drink until I blacked out. Eventually I was blacking out almost nightly. Reality was not beautiful to me at this point in my life and I don’t know why. I just wanted to escape and alcohol offered me an off switch.

If anything, the alcohol only worsened my reality, my depression, and my problems. It was running the show from behind the scenes and I never really caught that until it had become a serious problem. I was allowing alcohol to be my focus in my day. Before alcohol, I was always interested in what foods I would have for dinner. After I started drinking regularly I would just sit and think about getting home from work and starting to drink. It had become a pattern of self-destruction and it crept into my life slowly.

I would have never believed that alcohol could take over my life. I didn’t believe it while I was in the process of relinquishing the reigns. I basically chose to live my evenings and nights drunk. I ended up at a job working a lot of hours, otherwise I think I would have spent entire days blacked out. Luckily, I was working 60+ hours a week and able to use that as an excuse not to drink. After work, though, I was drinking upwards of a liter of 80 proof vodka every evening.

This pattern persisted for about 3 years without cease. I would have an occasional light day or day off, but never more than one. I was functioning fine in the work place as far as I could tell, I was steadily building my career and maintaining my hours. I had no joy in life, the only thing that seemed to give me a bit of relief or pleasure was drinking. Even then, I didn’t like the way I felt drunk or the hangovers after. It was a ridiculous and embarrassing cycle to be stuck in.

I didn’t really try to hide my drinking, but I didn’t really tell anyone about it either. My close friends knew that I was a drunk, but nobody would really say it to my face. I became the butt of jokes frequently. I used almost anything I could as an excuse to get hammered. I would be the guy sneaking away from the party to secretly chug liquor out of someone else’s bottle. I would inventory how much alcohol was at a given situation and try to devise plans to get it inside of me. I was a textbook alcoholic and couldn’t admit it out of shame. I knew in my heart I was a drunk, but I refused to tell anyone else.

Even if I was trying to hide something, it became apparent when people would show up to my house in the early evening on a Sunday and I was blacked out and sleeping on the couch. Or the fact that I could never go to a public event without pre-gaming. Of course, when I would pre-game, I would typically go overboard and end up sloppy drunk in public at whatever event I was forcing myself to go to in order to please somebody else. It was tragic looking back, but living it felt normal at the time.

Alcohol ended up straining my marriage and several of my friendships. I called off a few days from work due to hangovers. I would just pretend to be sick. Other times I would go to work hungover. There were even a few days I went to work still drunk from the night before and didn’t sober up until late afternoon. I was jeopardizing my livelihood and yet continued to drink. It wasn’t until I became desolate and suicidal in December of 2017 when I truly decided to stop drinking.

It was a random day of no significance. I didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t make a big deal of it. I just stopped buying vodka. I began to dry out and tried to change my entire lifestyle. I was easily 100 pounds overweight, so I decided to work out and eat healthy. I gave up drinking completely. No cheat days, not even for special occasions. Within a week my stomach stopped hurting, my energy improved, my mood was lifting, and I felt lighter on my feet. Life without alcohol was all I needed all along and I had never given it a chance.

I was able to go 6 months without drinking. I lost 80 pounds or so. I felt the best I had in my entire adult life. My depression was lifted. I was thinking quickly and clearly. I had no complaints. Then, I decided to end my marriage, met a new lover, lost my job, and life took a complete turn. Instead of sticking to my tried and true methods of staying happy I stumbled back into a pattern of self-loathing and eventually drinking.

I began by drinking a few glasses of wine to loosen up. Then I had a really stressful day and I took to buying a bottle of vodka and chugging it. I became an asshole instantly and nearly ruined my new relationship in one evening. I was a complete piece of trash. I have always been a colorful and malicious drunk. I don’t say this for any other reason than it is true. Unfortunately, at the point of blackout it is out of my control. I can assure you that sober I am not that person. Drunk I become a monster at times. I let loose a tirade of destructive sentences and actions. I don’t know where they come from. When people tell me of the things I say and do while blacked out I am often mortified. They are not my true beliefs, yet they surface. I am an insecure, childish, angry, and bitter person when I am drunk.

After the first evening of drinking I vowed to no longer get drunk. I tried to stick to 2-3 glasses of wine on days I would choose to drink. This didn’t last long. Something else would surface in my mind. Some sort of emotion or insecurity. I would use it as an excuse to run off and get drunk. One evening, out of the blue, I decided that my relationship was headed a bad direction and therefore I wanted to check out. I ran to the store as quick as I could while my lover was in the shower and I chugged a bottle of liquor. I could not form sentences or stand upright when she emerged, disappointed and confused of course.

Alcohol broke my lovers heart. I allowed it to get between us. I allowed a substance to take control of me and to shit on my future plans. I regret this deeply and looking back I wish that could have just been the bigger man and spoke up about my emotions. I wish that I would have just communicated instead of running. I am working on that to this day.

Now I am about a week sober after a week-long bender. I spent entire days drunk and passed out to avoid my seemingly inevitable future. The truth is, had I woken up and faced my fate. Had I intervened early on as the people around me were pushing for. Had I done anything other than lay down and wait to die, the situation would have been better. I didn’t though. I gave up and drank. I can’t change that fact, but I can learn from it and grow. I plan to use this experience as well as the others I mentioned above as reminders of what alcohol can take from me.

I am an alcoholic, there is no doubt about that. It doesn’t matter that my withdrawal symptoms are minimal. It doesn’t matter that when I decide to stop I can just stop. I am an alcoholic. I am prone to using substances to hide from my less than desirable reality. I am human, and I need to own that and build on it. I hope that the people around me understand that and are willing to give me another shot.

When I turned back to drinking it wasn’t to hurt people around me. It wasn’t for any other reason than I was at my wits end and I was ready to give up. I am ashamed to admit that, but it is the truth. I was ready to lay down and die but didn’t want to take a bottle of pills or hang myself. I had thought about both and decided against them. I reasoned that if the alcohol didn’t kill me, God had a purpose for me and would pull me through. I know that is strange, but it is what my brain told me. I pulled through and I laid down the bottle.

Now my focus is on my future. My plan is to build a strong relationship with the love of my life. She is the fire in my heart that keeps me moving forward. I want to remain strong for my friends and family. I want to make something of myself that they can be proud of. I want to be someone that they can turn to in times of crisis and know that I will be reliable. I don’t want people to have to worry about whether or not I am sober. I want them to know that I am trustworthy and a great friend.

I want to live my life helping others. I want to give back to this world which has given me so much. I have learned more this year than I have in other years past and I am appreciative for the lesson. I can see that my life has purpose even when I don’t have a direct plan. Once I am upright and moving forward I hope to drag everyone else along with me. Alcohol has taken a lot from me, but it has not broken me. I have been able to overcome its grasp and move forth without looking back. I will remember the good times, bad times, and even the mundane. I will never forget because that is a mistake. I will not lull myself into a sense of security. I must remain vigilant. Alcohol is not a substance that I should put into my body, period.

As I look forward I am filled with hope. I can’t wait to blaze this trail with those who love and support me and to find our place in this crazy world. I am eager to change my community. I want to give back and share with others.

0 notes

josephkitchen0 · 6 years ago

Text

The Many Uses of the Chicory Plant

It’s getting to be that time of year when wildflowers appear a-plenty along roadsides everywhere. As I drive along, I like seeing the colors appear and trying to figure out what all those plants are. Lately, I noted a sea of pale blue and I wondered: what is that? A quick search and I found my answer; the Chicory plant.

I knew the Chicory plant was on the edible plants list, but I couldn’t remember what parts of the plant were edible or how to prepare them. It was time to do some research. I love learning new things, especially about foraging and understanding the plants growing around me, so I was excited to do some reading.

Ready to Start Your Own Backyard Flock?

Get tips and tricks for starting your new flock from our chicken experts. Download your FREE guide today! YES! I want this Free Guide »

About the Chicory Plant

Often called a “blue dandelion,” the Chicory plant has a lot in common with its cousin, the dandelion. You can eat the flowers, leaves and root of both plants. They will both add bitterness to your salad mix, but can be blanched to lessen that effect. The dandelion flower is less intense than the chicory blossom. Some say you can add the pretty blue flowers to a salad; others say they are too bitter.

Like many weeds, this perennial blooms summer into early fall. It is hardy and often found growing places where you wouldn’t expect flowers to thrive. Chicory is commonly seen near roadsides, in highway medians, at the overgrown edges of fields and even in gravel filled areas where nothing else can make it. It’s everywhere! I took this photo waiting on the light on the highway off-ramp.

Interestingly, there are a number of weeds on the edible plants list growing along the state route where we live. Not only will you find chicory plant, but also the milkweed plant, Queen Anne’s lace, honeysuckle, thistle, staghorn sumac and wild grapes. If you know what you are looking for, you can find plants to make everything from wine to jam and lemonade to medicinal remedies.

Milkweed

Wild grapes

Queen Anne’s Lace

Honeysuckle vine

Thistle

Staghorn Sumac

Chicory Benefits

Chicory has been utilized for its therapeutic qualities as far back as the Ancient Egyptians. I recently learned about how Chicory plant has been used throughout time as a home remedy for headaches. It’s also been used to relieve water retention issues, to reduce inflammation and to assist with digestive problems. The leaves, in particular, are rich in vitamins; particularly iron, calcium and copper.

There is a very informative full nutritional profile available on the Food Facts website. This site points out the chicory plant, particularly its root, as a good source of Vitamin A (114 percent of your recommended daily value) and Vitamin C (40 percent of DV).

Harvesting the Chicory Plant

There is some debate over whether these plants should be harvested if they have been absorbing car fumes along the roadside, but that’s a choice you’ll have to make for yourself. Many roadsides are also sprayed with chemicals. I figure our country road, even though it’s a state route, gets a lot less traffic than the highway, and they don’t spray much of the road by us. So I’m going start my harvest there.

As I set out with my shovel and my bucket, though, I find that the plants along our stretch of the road aren’t very big. Because my husband mows so regularly, they don’t get a whole lot of time to re-grow. I need a spot that’s kind of neglected and doesn’t get mowed often. Back to the drawing board …

I get in my car and drive further down the road. I don’t have to go far before I come upon a huge field that has a really lush stand of Chicory plants at its edge. I park my car and get out with my shovel and buckets. The farmer sees me and comes up, “What’s going on young lady?” he asks. I respond, “Would you mind if I dig out some of these weeds at the edge of your field?” He looks at me incredulously. I go on, “I want some of this Chicory plant so I can try to make coffee with it.” He smiles and says, “Go for it. You can have all the weeds you want. Have fun!”

He turns and walks away as I set to work. I want the whole plant so that I can try all the various parts: flowers, leaves and root. That means I need to loosen the soil all around the base of each plant so that I can pull out as much of the long taproot as possible. I pick a nice big plant to begin with and jump on my shovel to get it deep into the soil on all sides of the Chicory plant. Then I grab the stem near the base of the plant and yank. It slides out nicely, with just a little resistance. Continuing in this way, it doesn’t take me long to collect two big buckets of plants. With everything loaded back into my car, I wave at the farmer and head home.

After arriving home, I start to pull my Chicory plants apart. I take the flowers off and put them in a bowl.

I pick some of the freshest looking leaves off and put them in a different bowl.

Then I take a serrated knife and cut the roots free from the plants. This is a challenge! The roots are tough.

When I examine my harvest, I have one really nice big root and lots of much smaller ones.

Most of the resources I read said the roots should really be harvested in the fall so probably if you are patient and wait until the proper time, you’ll get more for your effort. I’ll work with what I got though.

I put water in my buckets and use a good old scrub brush to clean the roots. They are caked in wet dirt so this takes some time.

Once clean, I bring the roots, leaves and flowers inside. The latter two I stick in the fridge until I’m ready to make my salad. The roots I leave out on the counter to dry a bit. Now the real fun begins!

A Chicory Salad

As I mentioned above, the leaves of the chicory plant are edible, though bitter. They are supposed to be more tender and less intense in the early spring. I’m a little late on that (it’s late June as I’m writing) but I’m going to give it a try anyway.

I have a lot of good salad items in my garden now, so I’ve decided to make a lunch salad with Chicory leaves and flowers added to it.

I gather my ingredients from the garden: lettuce, sweet peppers, a watermelon radish, a few small beets and a cucumber.

The beets I boil, peel and chop.

Everything else I just clean and cut up. To this, I add the chicory greens and a few of the lavender chicory flowers, both rinsed well.

For a dressing, I make a batch of the Chive Balsamic Vinaigrette featured in my story on garlic infused white wine vinegar.

I won’t lie, those greens were bitter! The flowers weren’t so bad, but I would only add a few pieces of the greens, chopped up into small pieces if I had them again. Another option is to get them earlier in the spring, when their flavor is supposed to be more tolerable. Or, like dandelion greens, you can cook them, which helps lessen the bitterness. My dad recounts memories of his grandmother cooking dandelion greens and pokeweed leaves in bacon fat and how it was always so delicious. You can see his mouth start to water when he talks about it.

If you have a lot of flowers, you can also try pickling them. I found an interesting recipe, but didn’t have enough flowers to try it.

A Coffee-Lover’s Adventure: Chicory Root Coffee

As a coffee lover, I was intrigued when I heard about this plant that could be used to make a coffee-like drink or could be mixed with coffee to enrich flavors. I had to try it!

To make chicory coffee, you have to roast the roots. So I gathered up the roots I had cleaned earlier, chopped them into smaller pieces and laid them out on a cookie sheet.

I set my oven to its lowest possible temperature: 170 degrees. I put the roots in the oven and went about my day. Occasionally I came in and turned the roots, but mostly it just took time.

The roots cooked for about seven hours and when they came out they were totally dried out and smelled amazing. I wish I could somehow make this a scratch-and-sniff story so that you could share in the mix of nutmeg and cocoa that filled the oven after I took out my cooked roots.

The last step is to grind it up into a powder. For this, I used a small coffee grinder. It didn’t grind it into a super fine powder, but it did a pretty good job for a simple little machine. It’ll be good enough for the French Press.

I poured the ground, roasted roots into a jar for storage. Tomorrow I will give it a try mixed with some coffee.

I became a coffee drinker while living in Milan my junior year of college so the only coffee I drink is espresso. I have a little macchinetta di caffe that I got in Italy, which I use every morning. So my first experiment was chicory espresso. I prepared my coffee as usual but filled the strainer cup with half espresso and half chicory root. It tasted very similar to what I usually drink but maybe with a bit more spice to it.

Next I wanted to try straight chicory coffee using a French Press. I measured out 1/4 cup of my ground up roots and put them in the bottom of the French Press. Over that I added several cups of hot water that I prepared in the tea kettle.

I let it steep about eight minutes then pushed down the strainer.

It looked more like a tea than a coffee but that’s ok.

I poured some in one of my mother’s lovely little tea cups and gave it a try. Whew! It was strong … earthy … bitter! A little sweeter helped tremendously. It did have the same after taste as coffee does, that slightly bitter taste at the back of your mouth. I could see why people mix it with coffee or, in times past, used it as a replacement for coffee.

My final experiment was kind of like a chicory mocha. I added a teaspoon of cocoa to my cup and filled it back up from the French Press. I mixed it together well and drank a little. Now that I could drink regularly. The sweetness of the cocoa offset the bitterness of the chicory plant to make quite a nice drink. And you get the Vitamins A and C from the Chicory plant while enjoying the flavor of the chocolate.

I hope you learned something new from my little country culinary adventure.

What edib®ave growing in your yard? Let us know in the comments below.

The Many Uses of the Chicory Plant was originally posted by All About Chickens

0 notes

mavwrekmarketing · 7 years ago

Link

One California woman is living out all your wildest unicorn and mermaid fantasies by turning her downtown Los Angeles apartment into a rainbow, bubblegum dream.

Mucciolo’s downtown L.A. apartment

Image: studio mucci

“Wherever I live, I believe, should be a reflection of myself,” Mucciolo said of her home. “I want to live somewhere where I feel inspired and happy because Im an artist, and I work from home a lot.”

SEE ALSO: Get ready to obsess over unicorn-themed everything

When it comes to the inspiration for her pastel pad, she was influenced by all things that come with her favorite season.

My initial big inspiration was spring because spring is my favorite season,” she said. “Theres something really special about spring. The holidays in spring, all the pastel colors. I just wanted it to feel like spring all year long.

Mucciolo’s Washi tape-customized kitchen

Image: studio mucci

Mucciolo in front of her homemade flower wall

Image: studio mucci

Mucciolo’s rainbow theme doesn’t stop in the living room. Her kitchen cabinets, which took 10 painstakingly long hours to decorate, are covered in brightly colored Washi tape. She doesn’t mind the time it takes though. Mucciolo explained that she lives with OCD, and detailed projects are incredibly therapeutic for her.

Image: studio mucci

Paper cranes hanging from Mucciolo’s ceiling

Image: studio mucci

“All of these [projects] aren’t super fast things, but that’s what I’m into,” she explains. “Creating helps ease my mind, and has saved my life.”

Mucciolo’s “cave” bedroom

Image: studio mucci

Theres no natural light in the bedroom, which is usually a problem, but I wanted to make it a real strength,” Micciolo said. She used the “cave-like” feel of the room to channel the natural elements she was originally influenced by into a dreamy den.

Image: studio mucci

Mucciolo’s wall of fun, novelty bags

Image: studio mucci

“I said ‘Sorry guys, I hate this. I’m going to throw some paint on it.'” So she used the leftover paint to splatter the wall and create the rainbow statement she dreamed of having. Although the flower wall is what people love the most about her home, she said she feels the best when she looks at her mistake-turned-masterpiece.

The splatter wall

Image: studio mucci

If you’re wondering what her husband thinks of of the decor, it sounds like he’s pretty into it.

“My husband is also a unicorn. Were business partners in Studio Mucci, so once that really started I think he just knew that that was what his life was gonna look like. I think it makes him happy. His style is a little more minimalist, so if he had his way things would be slightly more minimal. But he helps me edit when I want to go farther.

When asked what one word describes her home, Mucciolo said “celebration.”

“Thats the business that Im in,” she said. “Thats pretty much how I live my life. The theme of my life is celebration. Its a reminder to celebrate every moment. I do all of this for myself because it makes me and my husband happy. But I really do this to help inspire other people, and help other people know they can be and do whatever the hell they want. I want to inspire people to be more of themselves.”

Well, we definitely feel inspired by this joyous, celebratory aesthetic, and are furiously looking through her Instagram for ideas. Anyone want to help us build our own flower wall?

WATCH: This hair dye changes color based on your environment