#the boys talking boys shit while the girls not fuckin' understanding them

[thenerdymouse]

! ! Spoilers Ahead! ! !

I am going to ramble about Whisper and the Diamond Cutters in the new comic! Because my god, I love this! But beware, this contains spoilers!

OMFG, she is so fuckin' proactive and LOUDER than her current self!

I love how she USED TO BE a fucking ball of energy!

Smithy and Slinger having a brotherly rivalry is EPIC!

I love how these guys are like just so excited to fight unlike everyone else

I now understand how fucking hurt Whisper was when she lost her team

Okay, I feel tiny bit sad for Mimic, BUT he is still a fucking asshole for killing his team!

His redemption arc would be WILD lmao

WHISPER CALLED SMITHY A BIG TEDDY BEAR?! HUHWUAEAYU

I love the sisterhood between Whisper and Claire! Diamond Cutter Sisters 4 life!

[wtfsteveharrington]

after midnight | carmen berzatto x reader

summary: chicago is expensive, okay? so you pick up a job outside of the restaurant which just so happens to involve your camera. everything's fine until richie stumbles upon the website and shares it with camry.

contents: perv!carmy, male & female masturbation, sex toys, dirty talk, cam sex, slight dub-con kinda if you look for it. carmy’s honestly a wreck. mentions of unprotected sex, choking, oral sex, overstimulation. please note!! no formal intercourse takes place yet but it's cuming coming but ya girl wants a slow burn

reader description: she/her pronouns, there is semi a hair scene but i use no real descriptors so still vague!

word count: basically 3.9k

author notes: first fic in a year baby and boy did i lose the plot!! filth!! also i sure love saying fuck in this so enjoy that

part two

★–————————–

Richie’s voice is annoying. It echos, ricochets off the walls, and can’t be contained by even the highest quality of sound proofing. Which is why, at 8 in the morning, Carmen’s already considering having to take Excedrin as Richie bursts through the doors. 

“Carmy, Cousin, you’re never gonna fuckin’ believe what I found last night.” He’s out of breath after running in, fumbling around with his phone in a rush to pull something up. He’d spent all night contemplating if he texted Carmen or waited to show him in person. Ultimately the urge to see his reaction won but that didn’t stop Richie from waking up before his alarm out of excitement. “Listen, we’re both grown ass men so I’m gonna say it -“ he’s glancing around to make sure they’re alone, “- So I’m laying there and jerkin’ my shit, right?” 

Carmen’s wincing, pinching the bridge of his nose and contemplating every decision that brought him back to Chicago. 

“Dude, fuck off. I don’t wanna hear -“ Richie tsks, cutting him off. 

“Nah, shut the fuck up because you wanna hear this. In fact, you’re gonna wanna fall to your knees and kiss my shoes and praise my ass as a thank you for finding this.” 

He’s holding up his phone, an iPhone 8 he refuses to upgrade, and illuminated on the screen is a video of you. You, on your knees, in lingerie. You, with your fingers dragging down your chest, across the lace that covers your breasts. Your head falls back as you run your thumbs across your nipples. A sound so angelic coming from your lips that Carmen starts to understand why people spend so much time at Church. He’s convinced you’re hand carved by God, or Buddha, or whatever might be up there. 

Carmy’s instantly feeling a rush of heat across his chest and his cheeks as he takes the sight of you in. It feels wrong but at the same time the coiling in his stomach feels so good he can’t look away quite yet. “Why the…” He’s cut off by a whine coming from Richie’s speaker as you keep teasing yourself. His brain is frying for a second as he tries to focus on finishing his sentence. “How the hell did you find this?” 

“Listen, sometimes I get bored on the same ole sites, okay? Clicked an ad to see who was live and ended up here. Now I stopped watching, obviously, out of respect but this? I’ve known you long enough to know when you gotta thing for someone and you’re not gonna act on it. Also, I caught you staring at her ass as she filled the deep freeze the other night. Kinda gave it away. So this is the way you can still get some pussy while being a fuckin’ pussy.” Richie’s punching the air, clearly proud of himself.

Carmy’s smacking him upside the head, his body now torn between lust and annoyance. “Watch your mouth, alright? That is so fucked, Richie. Put that shit anyway and I better not see you tell a single other person this exists.” 

And yeah, he took note of your screen name before he walked away. Don’t judge him. 

———★–————————–

Look - There have been a lot of times in his life where Carmen hasn’t been proud of himself. But settling back into bed, hooking his thumbs on the waistband of his boxers and pulling them down to rest under his balls? Yeah, he’s not proud to say the least. After seeing even just the glimpse of you this morning though it’s been all he could think about. The. Whole. Fucking. Day. He watched out of the corner of his eye while you bent over the line to scrub down the wall behind your station tonight. Burning to memory the way your ass just slightly jiggled from the aggressive motion of wiping down the surface. A soft grunt coming from you as you reach for something just a little too high. He finally snapped out of it when the smell of the chemicals he sprayed down on his own surface got a little too strong and refocused. 

He wasn’t proud when he ran to the restroom and contemplated just jacking off over the toilet to get some relief. You were clouding his brain, only the rush of the evening giving him some small relief. 

You seemed vocal in the small clip he saw. He’s wondering if you would have asked him to cum for you. Would you think it’s a waste that he’s cumming down the drain instead of covering your ass with it? Filling your mouth and making you swallow every drop around him? Or, Jesus Christ, would you wrap your legs around his waist and beg him not to pull out? 

So yeah. Carmy’s had quite the fucking day to say the least. 

He’s finally home and running straight to bed. His stuff dropped in a heap by the front door and was easily forgotten. Throwing himself back onto the mattress after ripping off his shirt and his pants. Left just groaning into the empty room, his cock twitching at the thought of you. Your page has been sitting on an Incognito tab all day and it’s finally, finally being loaded up. This feels like an invasion of privacy in a way but Carmen can’t quite think logically with how heavy his balls feel and how painfully hard he is. There’s not much time to spare so he clicks the first video you’ve uploaded that he can.

And there you are. 

Sitting in the middle of a big bed and rubbing your hands along your thighs, smiling at the camera. His heart is twitching, cock is twitching, everything is fucking twitching. And you’re just sitting there, licking your lips and sliding your hands under the thin material of some weird lace one piece he wants to rip off. 

“Hi there, Pretty Boy.” Your voice is music to his ears and Carmy can’t take it any longer. His fist is wrapping around his cock, a broken moan filling the room as he finally gets some relief. “I’ve been waiting for you to come home all day.”

Sue him, but he’s skipping ahead a little. There’s not much time until he cums and he needs to see you. All of you. He’s gripping his phone with one hand, bringing the other that’s around his cock up to his mouth to spit in. His thumb is haphazardly trying to keep the phone balanced while scrubbing through the video until he thinks he’s at a good spot. You’re laid back now, thighs spread for the camera and pussy on display. Carmen’s muttering to himself about how gorgeous you are, longing to tell you in person. You’re holding this royal blue dildo in your hands that’s suddenly his biggest enemy. He deserves to be there, not this stupid, useless chuck of silicone. There’s a whimper from the speaker as you take the toy and slide it along yourself, tapping it twice against your clit. “Fuck, I need you.” 

Fuckin’ hell does he needs you too. 

His fist is clamped around his dick once again, fucking his hips up into the the slick, tight grip. You’re still teasing yourself by sticking just the head of the dildo in before gasping and pulling it back out. “Please, Baby. I need you so bad, need to come for you.” His brain is breaking. An animalistic urge taking over to fuck you until you can’t move, can’t think, just a blubbering mess begging him for more. Without warning you push the dildo all the way in, throwing your head back with a pleasured scream. 

Carmy gasps, hips sputtering and losing their rhythm as he watches you fuck yourself. He’s stroking himself at the same pace you’re moving the dildo, imaging it’s you he’s fucking into. Picturing you laid under him, your breasts covered in hickies because he hates the idea of these… Perverts watching you get off. He wants to mark you, claim you as his. His balls are tightening and he can’t think of the last time he came this quick. It’s almost embarrassing - What are you doing to him? 

Your free hand comes up to shove two fingers in your mouth, lewdly sucking them for the camera. The sucking noise now accompanying the wet, addictive sounds of your pussy being fucked. Carmen whimpers, actually fucking whimpers, and twists his wrist over his cock to get a little more friction. Your voice hits him once again as you slide your wet fingers out of your mouth and down your throat. “Oh fuck I’m so close. So, so close. Are you close, Baby? Want you to come with me.” You’re lightly choking yourself, a whining mess. 

Carmy’s aware he’s talking to an empty room but he can’t stop himself. “Fuck, oh fuck. Gonna come for you.” And his stomach coils, hips sputter, the phone falling to the bed as he has to let go of it as his orgasm washes over him. He’s slack jaw, warm cum landing on his chest and the sounds of you finishing at the same time ringing out from his phone. 

Oh he’s so fucked. 

————–——★–————

Carmy slept well for once in his life. His orgasm lulling his body to sleep, dreams filled of you. How beautiful you look sucking his cock. The way you must sound while he eats you out. And he takes his time in his dream. Tongue dragging between your folds as his rough hands hold your hips in place. You’re powerless, made to lay back and let him eat you out for his own pleasure. Tongue circling around your clit but he waits until you’re close to tears to stop teasing. He’d praise you. “Look how fucking wet you are, Princess. You’re already getting the bed wet, aren’t you? Gonna have to lick you for hours to get you all cleaned up. Can you say please, huh? Ask me to suck on your clit, Baby. You know you need it.” 

He woke up hard and overstimulated, rolling over onto his stomach and pathetically dragging his hips against the warm bed to get some much needed friction along his cock. Carmy’s telling himself how pathetic this is and forcing himself to push off the bed and get into the shower before he’s late. 

Yes, he jacked off in the shower before work. 

He had to. 

Carmy can’t decide if it’s heaven or hell when he walks in to see you standing in the kitchen. 

You’re on your tiptoes, balancing haphazardly as you’re reaching up to change the light. There’s a wobbly step stool under you. Everyone keeps saying it needs to be replaced but it continues to live on. Your face is scrunching up in concentration. Carmy’s chuckling at the sight and ignoring the way he feels his balls tug at the sight of you. “What’re you doing there, Chef?” 

You huff in annoyance, finally untwisting the light cover from the ceiling. “Damn light went out right as I started veggie prep. Hate to be a bother but will you come spot me while I’m up on this thing? I’ve seen Fak bust his ass one too many times to trust it.” 

Carmy can’t verbally respond at first, instead stalking over to stand next to you. His hand comes up to cup the back of your knee and he’s lying to himself saying it’s for your own safety. To keep you balanced. “Yea well something tells me you’re less clumsy than Fak. I’ve seen that guy fall over while just standing still.” 

And you laugh. 

You laugh. At him. At his joke. He, Carmen Berzatto, made you laugh. The sound filling his ears and now his damn heart and balls are both reacting to you and what the hell is he supposed to do with all these emotions. 

“Don’t distract me up here, Chef.” He doesn’t mind taking commands from you. Silently reaching up to hold the light fixture you’re passing him as you change gears to switch out the lightbulbs now. 

And maybe his eyes are wandering around the kitchen to see who else might catch a glimpse of you two together. Everyone who’s in so far is honed in on their prep task and Carmy thanks God that Richie hasn’t shown up yet today. 

He’s become quite faithful since he started falling for you it seems. 

It happens, by chance, that you feel a little unsteady and Carmen tightens his grip on the back of your leg. Fingers digging into your soft skin. He’s looking down at the stool to make sure it’s level before looking up to take in the sight that is his hand around your leg. 

And he stops looking there. 

Okay fine that’s a fucking lie - he’s looking up. Eyes trailing up your thighs, following along the curve of your ass. When you have to lean forward just slightly to twist in the light cover he’s convinced he can see the outline of your pussy through the thin material of your leggings. He’s contemplating his options - If he could, would he lean in and lick over the outline? His warm mouth teasing you through your leggings. Through your underwear. Are you wearing underwear? He’s torn between picturing you with or without them. 

Or would he slide his hand up your leg, palming your thigh as he goes. Cupping over you and dragging his middle finger across the shape of you. Memorizing the feeling. Would you whine? Grind down against his hand? He doesn’t think you’d shoo his touch away. 

God he just knows you’re a needy little thing. 

He wonders what it would feel like for you to lick your own wetness from his jaw after he’s decided he’s done savoring you. To taste you on your own tongue when he kissed you after. You’d look so pretty with his cum dripping down your lips too. All fucked out and exhausted and full of bliss. 

“Okay, I think I got it fixed, Carmy.” God, he’s so fucked for thinking of you like this as you’re innocently changing the light. Just trying to improve the kitchen and he’s thinking about ruining you. He was so caught up in daydreaming that he didn’t even feel you take the light cover back out of his hand and screw it into place again. 

You’re beaming down at him, using his shoulders as arm rests as you bounce down from the stepping stool. His hand grazes your ass - A total accident. He swears it. You reach behind him to sit the screwdriver down, your chest firmly against his. Nothing thinking anything of the personal space violation as you’re used to it from so many slammed nights in the kitchen. 

“Thank you for helping me. Sorry it was basically just five minutes of my ass in your face.” Carmy chokes. 

His cheeks are hot. 

Fuck is he blushing? 

He’s sputtering out of his words. “It uh, it wasn’t in my face. Not that I looked, y’know. Just uh… Just - just trying to say that I’m happy to help.” He sounds like an idiot

You’re cocking an eyebrow, clearly entertained. “Holy shit, Carmy.” You pat your hands against his chest, not knowing your touch was like fire on his skin. He grabs the screwdriver and makes a beeline to the office to put it away for you. 

Sure he grabbed a rag on the way. No it’s not for him to jack off into while he thinks of you. 

Okay fine, it is. 

“Fuck me.” The only thing Carmy can risk trying to say as the door shuts heavy behind him and his pants hit the ground. 

———————–★–———

Carmen doesn’t avoid you now but he certainly makes it hard to get close to you. He’s too distracted when you’re around. Maybe there’s a bit of guilt mixed in too at his new night routine. Leave the restaurant, load your page, and wait to see what happens. New videos? New pictures? You were wormed into the back of his brain and it had to stop. 

So your station got moved further down rotation. You’re at the end of the line on the left, he’s at the start on the right. It helps clear his mind, lets him hone in on perfecting what goes to the floor. 

He’s able to move quickly, shifts blowing by as the restaurant’s rush takes all his attention. The clock clicks down two minutes till close, everyone working in silence to get the place flipped and go home. He’s wrapping up with Syd, helping her make a few adjustments to expo before grabbing a dead plate off of the end of the line and heading to the office with his food and a cup of water in hand. He needs a mental minute, a bite of food, and to let his thoughts all catch up. 

The door’s already cracked and he’s halfway through the entry way when he registers you. Sitting there. At his desk. Your legs are crossed, a cool damp towel resting over your eyes. He wants to turn on his heel and retreat but decides that he can’t treat you any differently just because he’s developed some silly little crush. Running away would be treating you different. 

“You good, Chef?” 

To which you groan. Different from the ones he’s used to - This one is guttural, pained. You press your hands flat against the rag and will the cool temperature to help the pressure in your head. “Killer migraine, that’s all. Shit was moving so fast tonight and I wacked the back of my head on something in the walk in. Sorry for being in here, Carm. Just uh, needed a second.” You should push up out of the chair, show your respect. But right now you’re half convinced that standing up would be detrimental so for now you’re cemented to the seat. 

“Heard.” Carmen nods to himself, sitting down the plate before opening up the desk drawer as quietly as possible. Your knee is pressing into the side of his thigh, grounding and warm. He fishes out a bottle of medicine, shaking out two pills. “Hold out your hand.” 

You take a second to brace yourself for movement, sitting up and moving the towel off your eyes. Letting it pile up into a clump on the desk besides you. There’s no way around it - You look pitiful. Pouting up at Carmen as he hands over two pills and his cup out water. You take the pills diligently, taking a few gulps and letting your eyes fall back closed as you will them to kick in instantly. “Can I ask a favor?” 

“Anything, Chef.” 

Slowly, so not to shake yourself up, you turn the chair until your back is to Carmen. “Will you see if I gotta bump back there? Kinda terrified I gave myself a concussion but I don’t wanna believe it was that hard.” 

He snickering, a grin pulling up the corners of his mouth as he steps closer. “Well you’d absolutely fuck me if you needed to file workmen’s comp so I’m gonna need you to be fine, ‘kay? Way too much fuckin’ paperwork to do on a Friday night.” You start to laugh but it’s quickly cut off into a small groan of appreciation as you feel warm, rough hands clasp either side of your shoulders. 

Carmen works his way up your neck and catches himself holding his breath as his fingers brush along your scalp. He’s taking his time, savoring the moment, all under the pretense of taking care of his employee. That’s all. “Think we’re both in the clear. You feeling alright besides the headache? Need me to hold up some fingers for ya to guess? Haven’t managed to cut any off so we’ve got all ten to work with.” He’s got you laughing again while rough fingers work their way back down to your neck. The feeling of the vibration of your laughter against his hands sending chills down his back. 

Wordlessly Carmen gets to work rubbing your shoulders. Tender, deep. Years of practice rolling out dough and desserts and tenderizing meat coming into play as he continues to knead away at your tense body. You let out an appreciative moan and Carmen has to start thinking of something to keep his inevitable hard on from being obvious. 

When his hands come up closer to your neck once again he’s hit with flashbacks of the first video he watched. You choking yourself — Is that something you truly liked? If his hand came around to cup your throat, palm resting on one side with his fingertips firmly against the other, and lightly squeezed would you moan? Rub your thighs together in search of some hint of relief? 

“Are you always this good with your hands, Chef? Hmm? Can’t imagine you giving Marcus this treatment.” You’re laughing and can practically hear the smirk in Carmen’s voice as he responds. “Yeah - You uh, didn’t know that? I just love you know, rubbing shoulders. It’s my thing. Kick your ass all night and then rub the stress out.” 

He’s blanching a little at his reply. Kinda obvious but okay then, Carmen. You reach up, putting your hands atop his with a little smile. “Well thank you for… Rubbing my stress out, Chef.” 

Carmen’s red. Head to toe just bright red. “Of course, Chef. Anytime.” He’s entertaining to say the least as you pat his hands before spinning around in his chair. You snag another drink of water, throwing him a wink before moving to exit the office. Your hand runs along his chest, an appreciative gesture, as you head back to the floor. 

——————————★–

Late Saturday night Carmen’s so exhausted that he barely has the energy to take his work clothes off. Falling haphazardly onto his old couch, kicking his work boots off one at a time. His eyes are heavy, body aching, and he almost falls asleep before he gets to see you. 

But he’s fishing his phone from his pocket, refreshing the all too familiar landing page to see you’re actively live. How you have the energy is beyond him. 

You’re standing there trying on clothes that someone must send in and Carmy feels a pang of jealousy. He’s watching through half hooded eyes as you slip in a pair of shorts, turning your behind towards the camera and pulling them up just slightly to put more of your ass on display. You’re chatting away about the material while slowly pulling them down to reveal just this frilly little pair of panties that was sent in as well. 

He’s propping the phone up on the armrest of the couch, laying on his side while he watches you chat away. It’s soothing. Almost like an ASMR video. 

Carmen’s not sure when he fell asleep - Somewhere in-between you trying on a third outfit and attempting to clean up your bed from all the packaging. He finds you soothing, comforting. He makes a mental note to hunt out some sort of wish list you must have for these items before passing out and, once again, dreaming of you.

[lundenloves]

@bringinsexybackk69: can i please request dad simon with a boy? like yeah he has all his girls and then there's either the youngest or the oldest and it's his only son? i can just picture like the girls are jealous cause he gets new clothes not hand-me-downs, he gets to do his own sports with out his siblings, he gets to go shooting with the 141- just like totally sibling rivalry and fighting over who is dads favorite?!

youngest.

simon is over the fucking moon when he finds out it's a boy - he's one of them dads in american gender reveals who says “i think you're a girl but i need you to be a boy" 💀

instant attention all goes to this kid, because A) he actually knows how to do it now and B that's his boy. that's his fuckin lad.

the kid looks like you. boys look like their mums, girls look like their dads n all that but christ does he have simon's quietness.

a complete observer like his dad. will be in silence while the girls argue, quietly exchanging glances with simon who internally feels like fucking high-fiving himself for creating a kid who finally understands him.

however the clothes are admittedly down to you, you love buying shit. any excuse. and having a son instead of another girl gave you great reason. though you did go too far sometimes. credit card bills rocketed.

he gets his own room too. straight off the bat, fresh into this fucking world and he's got it all. or that's how your daughters seen it.

“how does he get everything."

“give him a fucking chance." mumbling something about how he's only a week old. the dad sigh strikes again.

him and simon fuck off together a lot. they'll be away camping somewhere, simon teaching this (probably half uninterested) kid how to do all the survival stuff since his girls were never interested.

and when he gets older, maybe around seventeen to eighteen he's so game for that stuff. realistically, was probably in the school cadets n all 💀

when he's able enough, he'll maybe tag along on a run with 141 or summat. this is an incredibly humbling experience to say the least, though uncle soap is there to make everything a laugh n slow the run. "boys, boys, give the lad a chance eh?"

gets into his dads routine of the gym in mornings too, simon watching his workout from a distance before giving him pointers - hands on hips before stepping back to see if he's doing it right or not.

although, simon does not let him apply to the army. all fun n games till it wants to happen isn't it padre?

probably applies behind simon's back ngl. resulting in a huge fuck off argument once a letter comes in stamped under british army branding under the kids name instead of his own. yikes.

classic son x father shouting match.

i’m probably going to get asked to write that now aren’t i? happily, gladly, don’t get me wrong. sorry i haven’t been writing much but i do enjoy talking to you lot in the inbox.

simon 'ghost' riley taglist: @vamppxncess @crowbird @tallrock35 @fluffmonster @islanderr @blueoorchid @lea3773 @coldflapjack @rayhawk05 @han11dh @liishook @melovetitties @fallonx @rvjaa @fuckmelifesucks @bhayatsara @takeomisbitch @local-spidey @konigsblog @penutjuice @babychoi03 @sheluvzeren @sparklingtragedy @maviee @wiserebelpartypie @daddylorianisastateofmind @bhayatsara @mistydeyes @writingmysanity @johfaam0 @idkbbyx3 @gressseyy @fwibblefwobble @shibble @maladaptivedaydreamingbum @airghostlyfox @hotgirlsshareaccounts @simpxinnie @cliosunshine @bloobewy @lazybutsmexy @maki-z @yyiikes @tieflingteatime @cosmoscoffee @lilvampirina @cinnabeanz @bubbyblob @spencerreidisbae123 @ellies-girll @paperbag-prncs @cookiecutta @sluttyforsimon

[gamblersdoll]

PUT MY NAME ON IT, NOW IT DESIGNER 4

cw: pure smut, maybe heavy for some, fluff at the end.

“hak–!” you yelped, feeling the sting on your ass.

currently, you laid across his lap, naked and your ass bare. it was pretty red, almost bruised and practically hot. and it was in the same spot you were in. even though hakari was sitting back, practically manspreading, he had a wide lap.

“count the number or ill restart.” he threatened, rubbing your poor abused ass cheeks. you were given 25 slaps… and only on ten. that fucker knows he has thick and heavy hands.

“ten…” you said, how pitiful.

another slap, had you biting your lip and whimpering. “eleven!” you yelped again, feeling him rubbing his hand on your cheeks, giving you some form of relief. “baby please!”

“baby please.” he mocked back, slapping your ass again. “cmon babydoll, keep up.” he said, mockingly.

“twelve!!” you whined, squirming and kicking your feet slightly. only causing hakari to grow annoyed and yank you back, dragging his thick fingers up and down your puffy and soaked slit, exhaling as he felt his cock finally get a little thicker, too.

“fuck , mama…” he whispered in your ear, adding another digit to rub your slit. “pussy is practically droolin for me, huh?” he said tauntingly.

“is too much.. spanking too much..” you said, feeling and knowing that you have to wear loose clothes now, because your ass would be raw.

hakari flipped you on his lap, holding you while he kissed your cheeks stained with sweat and tears while rubbing circles on your puffy clit. it made your hips buck against his fingers.

“poor baby needing her pussy finger fucked, huh? how do you ask?” he said, making you look at him. he plunged a finger into your precious pussy, feeling how warm and juicy you were, you really hadnt had any action in a year? fuck he could tell why you always acted out, that bitch boy boyfriend couldnt put it on you.

“please..” you said, only able to muster that. how pathetic, because you were just talking big girl shit a couple minutes ago, what happened to that? you never knew. all you did know was that your was was raw and tingling , and hakari is like a personal oven at four hundred degrees right now.

“ill let it slide.” and he curled his fingers, only moving the tips of his fingers like he beckons your g spot to come to him. “so what are we gunna stop doin now..?” he whispered in your ear, feeling his body heat get even hotter.

“fuckfuckfuckfu-“ you said repeatedly, eyes threatening to roll back but only snapping back to hakari when he speaks. “not to- oh shit..– not to talk back– ha fuck!” you moaned out, legs trying to close back together until hakari separates them. he was always so big and strong, he just made you feel weak with him.

“yeah, baby. was talking all big and bad, and now look at you.” he said, with a hint of sass and rolling his eyes. he kisses on your neck, sucking so slightly and his fingers were vicious, faster than they were before. he felt something familiar , like he knew it was his fever coming hard, those fevers as if he was going to land a huge loan and win even bigger.

“i cumin! i cumin—!” you chanted, holding onto his beefy arm, hiding your face in it, trying to close your legs but for no avail, just to have hakari slam them open—

JACKPOT!

you came with a cry, body convulsing and the arch of your back could make him feral, feeling your walls spasm on his fingers as he rubbed your clit in circles and sucked on your neglected tits. you finally caught your breath after some cooing and praises from him, along the lines of “good fuckin girls” or “thats my girl, thats it.”

you tried to close your legs, until he slotted himself between you as you lay on your back.

“uh uh, i ain done with this pussy yet.” he said, freeing his cock and him hissing at the cool air. he rubbed your hips, to at least ease your body before he fucked you. your body was so fuckin pretty, he just doesn’t understand how you havent been touched in a year.

he kisses your plump lips, biting so softly and low growls coming from him. he kisses your neck, down to your collarbone, to your chest and your mounds.. your stomach, and your little tummy where your poor uterus was. he puts his forehead against yours, as he slides the fat of his cock in.

holy fuck did you not forget that.

you both had a small moan, remembering when you both were younger and fucked on the daily, at most three to four times a day. he wasnt even in all the way.

“pussy remembers who fucks it the best, already clamping down on my cock and im barely all the way in.” he snickered , looking down at you. “you wan me to show you where it is, mama?” you nodded.

“okay babydoll, this right here…” he slightly pulls his hips back, and slams it back into you, watching you throw your head back and moan so loud. “is your cervix.” he says, thrusting slower and moans a bit, trying to not get too crazy with it since he basically had to take your virginity back. “fuck you feel too good..” he whines.

“fuckohmygoddaddy–“ you whimper, gripping his shoulder with your nails and biting your lip, barely able to keep your thighs apart. you feel hakari kiss on your neck, groaning whenever he thrusts faster and hits that gummy spot. “oh shit..!”

“there you go.. take all that dick im givin you..” he said, moving your attention back to him. he looks you in your eyes as he thrusts, trying to maintain eye contact. only for him to fail and roll his eyes back. “huuuuuhhh fuck!” he groans out, pressing his forehead against yours and have some combination of thrusting and grinding together, drawing a whine from you.

“kin!—“ you moan out, coming on his cock, rolling your eyes back as your toes curl. the convulsions of your pretty pussy pushes hakari more to his climax, his hips thrusting into you faster with vigorous motion and him growing desperate was apparent.

“fucken fuck!” he shouts, pulling out and jerking himself until he feels his seed spurt out on your tummy, a little on your breasts, and just barely your chin.

you were barely conscious at this point, only just regaining consciousness and feeling a warm rag on your soft tummy, causing you to flinch.

“relax.. its just me ma.” he says, cleaning your body and wiping your pussy down ever so gently. youre so glad you taught him how to wipe you. “imma get you some clothes and im gunna take you to get some food.” he says, already half dressed.

you nod, getting a sip of your now room temperature water and sipping it. “ can we also go to wally world?” and both of you start grinning.

“oh shit!” you whisper, running into aisle h after you were just in l. walmart was your wally world, and you both always act a damn fool.

“y/n!” hakari laughs, trying his best to hold it in and holding you. “oh youre a fuckin moron.” he laughs, kissing your forehead several times. both of you being in the toy slash athletic department, looking at whatever to play when you made it back to your apartment.

you pick up a random toy, looks electronic and it somehow turns on, startling you and you throw it back and it makes a loud “CLANK!” hakari bursts into a laughing fit, as you walk away, pretending you dont know what just happened. hakari comes up behind you, hugging you from behind as he towers over you and kisses you.

“get off!” you say, because hes a giant and youre little, and hes heavy. you giggle, holding him back.

“not in a million years, babydoll.” he says, using his finger to tilt your head up and kiss you. “lets get some banquet and call it a night?” he says, raising an eyebrow. you know exactly what hes talkng about, causing you to swat at him.

“fuckin up my day!” you say, mocking that one tiktok sound and you both made it home by at least eleven fourteen at night, crashing on the couch.

hope you guys enjoyed this one… i opened up a can of worms.

[chososbabymama]

(plug!suguru x fem!black reader)

plug!geto pt 1

head empty no thoughts, only plug suguru😩

[CW// swearing, implied NSFW, drug usage (jus weed yall i promise suguru not poppin percs or nothin), alcohol, mei mei (yes im makin a cw for her weird ass!!)]

sugu..｡oO (☆): u got me fucked up y/n, im omw.

[IMAGE ATTACHED]

shit… you stared at your phone, eyes widening in shock. you gather yourself quickly before rolling your eyes and tossing your phone to the side.

“ion even see why he’s coming over…. seems to be happy as hell with that other bitch he got” you grumble.

you see, growing up you and geto were next door neighbors. your parents thought it’d be a good idea for you to hang out together given that you would be attending the same school. through geto you were able to meet gojo, sukuna, choso, toji and nanami. you all became a close group fairly quickly, they essentially became your big brothers and did their best to keep you from harms way while also making sure they weren’t smothering you.

but your relationship with suguru was always… different. sure he had been just as protective as the rest, but he would always go above and beyond for you. girls were bullying you? he glued their shoes to their lockers and put stink bombs in their desks. some guy cheated on you? suguru sent videos of the guy smoking to his college recruiter and got his full ride scholarship revoked. you were being harassed in public? geto broke someones wrist after they tried to grab you. you were sad and lonely on valentines day? he showed up with a bouquet of your favorite flowers, a bag of your favorite things, and a big ass bottle of pink whitney.

so when you guys were 16 and geto told you he was gonna start dealing, you knew things were only gonna go up from there. he had been the one who got you into smoking, from your first pipe all the way to teaching you how to roll your own blunts. geto was smart, good with money, and had that disgustingly endearing boyish charm about him. naturally customers ate it up, and he thrived in your town for being the local plug. he continued his practice all the way until you guys went to college, him and sukuna even worked together sometimes at bigger parties and events. but the one thing geto had ALWAYS made clear, was that HE was gonna take care of you. 7 months after he first started he showed up to your house with a full zip, lighter, grinder, colorful pre-roll papers, and a pretty rolling tray to match (most of this stuff you still have and use to this day). needless to say you were shocked, you can still remember the way he sat you down on top of him as he explained how the grinder worked and how tightly you wanted to pack the cone.

“don't worry pretty girl, imma take care of you. wont have to spend a single cent on flower s’long as i'm around yea?” he buried his face in your neck and maybe it was the joint talking but you could’ve SWORE you had felt his lips on your neck and the grip on your hips tighten.

ever since that day, suguru has kept his word. you had consistently gone to him when you needed smoke and you never paid for it. just tell him how much you need and within the hour its in your hands. its caused quite the issues with his hookups, they couldn’t understand why YOU never had to pay but they did. you didn't fully understand why yourself, but each and every time he’d just shrug and give them the same answer,

“she’s just special.”

he’d never let you forget that to him? you always came first.

you loved all those boys with all your heart, but suguru managed to carve a special place all to himself, and you couldn’t say you were upset about it. which is why you were so fuckin pissed off about how these past few weeks have been. despite your growing feelings for suguru, you foolishly assumed that losing his friendship wasn't worth it. so you kept your feelings hidden for 6 years as you watched him fool around left and right. you of course had your own share of hookups, but you knew that no matter what you'd still end up in your shower crying out for him as you reached your peak.

these past few months with him, have been…. interesting. for some reason your interactions with him had become much more flirtatious. whenever you sat together his arm would be wrapped around your shoulder, he’d kiss you on the cheek anytime he left the room (gojo sometimes demanded one of his own and like the good friend he is, suguru would comply), and the nicknames?

‘hey sweetness you need anything?’

‘you know you’re my number one, right pretty girl?’

‘c’mon mama you know i miss you’

it was all honestly driving you insane, the back and forth with him. the constant battle you have with yourself about his intentions. its all just…. a lot. you were just getting used to the new aspect of your dynamic when all hell broke loose. it seems like one of sugurus past hookups was upset that he wasn't paying attention to them or any of his other past flings for that matter, not when he wanted you. so, they decided to…. fix that.

imagine your surprise when you get a text from hakari in the middle of your class,

karis bitch ass: “thought geto was fw u ???’

[3 IMAGES ATTACHED]

your eyes widened almost comically as you stared at the screen. kinji had sent you screenshots of mei mei's instagram story….. with suguru. the first was a shirtless picture with him facing away from the camera (sweats hanging dangerously on his waist).

you had to blink a couple times to make sure you were REALLY seeing this shit.

the next one was a video of him at a party pouring a bottle of crown royal into mei's mouth. you were floored, each second you spent watching it, felt as though your skin was getting hotter. but the TRUE icing on the cake was the last one. the last one that led to you avoiding and ignoring suguru for 3 weeks.

the last picture was of him driving. geto looked fine as fuck when he drove. he knew that, you knew that, everybody knows that suguru geto behind the wheel was a wet dream come true. the ‘i miss u sugu~’ glaring at you from the bottom of the photo. but what really made your eye twitch, was the fact that mei mei was in the passenger seat. YOUR fucking seat. designated to you by the owner himself. at this point you didn’t know whose ass to beat first and you honestly didn’t give a shit. it really was gonna depend on who crossed your line of sight first. you gathered yourself enough to get through the rest of your lecture before bolting out of the hall. you quickly shoot hakari back a text,

‘good thing u don get paid 4 thinkin🤨’

you locked your phone before heading to the campus bus stop. today has absolutely drained you, usually geto would pick you up and take you back to your apartment but you honestly didn’t feel like seeing him. as you trudge your way to the exit you feel your phone vibrate once more.

sugu..｡oO (☆): wya mama im outside waitin for u ?

you rolled your eyes at the message and sat at the bench as you watched the bus pull up. ‘he wants to give somebody a ride so bad maybe he should go find that fuckin bitch’ you thought bitterly. you knew you weren’t being fair, shoko was a really good friend to you- she always has been! now her classmate on the other hand…. lets just say there’s a reason you two don’t attend the same functions. but geto was close to her family so there were definitely moments him and mei mei could have snuck off together….. fuck. suguru wasn’t your boyfriend. you weren’t his girlfriend. but you at least thought maybe he’d…..

you shake your head and get on the bus. as you turn on your headphones you see that suguru sent you some more texts.

sugu..｡oO (☆): y/n ???

sugu..｡oO (☆): wats goin on baby y u not talkin to me ?

sugu..｡oO (☆): did i do sumn wrong ? wtvr it is im sorry dove :(

sugu..｡oO (☆): cmon y/n seriously, wtf is goin on im fr gettin worried abt u.

each text filled your body with a disgusting amount of rage. the sense of betrayal you felt from his actions was more than you could handle.

y/n🕸️: takin the bus from now on.

sugu..｡oO (☆): y/n what the fuck are you talkin about.

you didn't bother replying. you just put your headphones on and watched the bus travel your familiar route home. your phone continuously buzzed, no doubt suguru but you didn’t have the energy to engage with anyone right now. you just wanted to go home and smoke…… smoke the weed geto gave you….. well you can't have it all.

from then on you avoided your best friend like he was the fuckin plague. at first you thought you were being discreet with it... until people started blowin up your phone. see, suguru didn't exactly hide the fact that he took care of you; that he'd always be by your side. so for people to see one without the other was a surprising development. and suguru wasn't taking it well AT ALL.

( karis bitch ass: y/n ion kno wut geto did but pls take him back he wont stop bitchin!!!!

suguru went to a party thinking you'd be there: suprise! you weren't because you'd heard he was going so you stayed home. apparently he spent the whole time whining your name with his favorite peach crown royal in his arms on the sofa. it would have been cute if you weren't so mad at him.

ino sent you a video of suguru LITERALLY pushing a girl away on some, "get away you're not y/n" with that stupidly cute pout on his face.

even yuki was surprised about you icing geto out. sending you voice memos about the shit geto does while they're out. "no y/n the best part was when he tried to give the girl the bag she tried to ask for his number he fuckin mushed her and said 'sorry im married, her name is y/n and she can fight' ooouuu she was pissed!")

it was really hard being mad at suguru...

over the past three weeks you had been a bit lonely without him. sure you had the weed and a plethora of clothes he left at your place to keep you company, but you missed HIM. the way he'd stick his cold feet on you, how he always cheats at go fish, how he'll come over and play your PS5 while you sit in the back and cheer him on, the way he looks at you. you miss suguru so fuckin much.

but you also feel betrayed.

geto KNOWS that you and mei mei don't like each other, him being the one to hold you back from her on several occasions. you know they had a thing in the past but.... why would suguru be so fucking SWEET to you if he was just gonna go crawling back to her... it didn't make any fuckin sense to you. and unfortunately, you held a grudge. one that went so far as to even go to someone else for weed. in the entire time you've known suguru, you ALWAYS got your stuff from him. no matter what was going on between you two. but this time? this time you felt really hurt, so you turned to your backup plug; sukuna.

thing is, you've never actually bought from sukuna before. he knew about your weird thing with geto and he showed support his own way from the outside. you had never failed to notice that every picture or video someone sent you of suguru, sukuna was always nearby.

(what you didn't know was that sukuna was the one who had to listen to the long-haired males woes. sukuna was honestly getting sick and tired of it...)

but imagine the pinkette's surprise when he gets a text from you that friday night asking to pick up!

y/n☽˚｡⋆: hi 'kuna ! can i get a zip pretty pls ? id ask geto but i dont wanna bother him when hes busy haha

aside from the man in question being attached to his hip (that is no exaggeration sukuna is literally sitting on the couch with his best friends arms wrapped around his waist listening to him come up with reason 34248 'why y/n is so fuckin mad'). sukuna's tattooed hands had quickly taken a screenshot of your message to send to the man in his lap. he quickly grabbed a chunk of his friends inky locks with his free hand and shook.

"hey, idiot. check your fuckin phone i think you'll wanna see this"

suguru lifted his head and gazed at his roommate with bleary bloodshot eyes, the blunt from a few hours ago had settled nicely in his skin (made it easier to wrack his brain and figure out what the fuck he did wrong). he rolled his eyes and flopped back down into the couch with a deep and heavy sigh.

"man what's the fuckin point. y/n is mad at me and wont tell me why so if she's not on my shit then what's the point of even havin a fuckin phone y'know?"

sukuna rolled his eyes and snorted,

"yeah i guess that's why she just texted me askin' for a zip, huh?"

"she fuckin what?" suguru shot up quick and grabbed his phone. his brows furrowed and he began to mutter to himself angrily. sukuna watched as suguru's frown got deeper with each second he looked at the screen. finally, he swore loudly before grabbing his jacket and his keys. "man i gotta go 'cuz now she's playin with me and im not about to let that happen." sukuna watched as geto threw on his hoodie and sneakers and ran out of their apartment.

as the plug ran down the steps he took out his phone to let you know he was on his way to you.

[IMAGE ATTACHED]

my cinnamon apple <3: u got me fucked up y/n, im omw.

which lead you to your current issue, trying to figure out what the fuck you're gonna do. you had planned to be mad at geto for at least a couple more days so him showing up like this wasn't something you were exactly ready for. you quickly scrambled to get yourself together and prepare for the inevitable conversation. you were sure he'd notice you dressed in his clothes (you had on his spider-man jacket and black headband to hold back your 613 lace). you had already rolled yourself a couple blunts so you decided to light up until the moment of truth.

as each hit filled your lungs with smoke, you could feel the anxiety fade. you hadn't anticipated meeting suguru so soon. and you're terrified of what this conversation could possibly mean for your friendship. on one hand if he decides to pursue a relationship with mei mei thats his business, but on the other, you know that it would be at the expense of your relationship with him. you haven't been able to be in a room with her ever since she outed your little sibling for being nonbinary. it had been something only a few people knew about but somehow mei's nosy ass found out and told anyone she could get to listen. now your family never backs down from a fight, your parents made sure of that. but it gets exhausting always being an outcast (being 3 years older you couldn't do too much to help, but at least they had yuji, nobara, and megumi around).

but when they came home one afternoon covered in bruises with a tired smile on their face saying, 'i won, i won' over and over again, you couldnt just sit idly. you went and showed that bitch who the fuck you were. and who you were was a fuckin maniac. you had slammed mei mei's head into a window, broke her nose, bruised her ribs, and gave her a black eye. suguru had to pull you off of her that day because you couldn't calm down. had the boys let you that day, you could have really beat the brakes off that girl. which is why her scary ass always runs away when you enter the room. instead she likes to talk shit and throw shots at you on social media.

the day of the fight, when mei was at the hospital she told doctors she had been mugged because she was too prideful to admit that she got her ass whooped.

just thinking about the shit you did to her that day brought a wicked grin to your face as you continued to smoke your blunt. if suguru wants a fuckin encore, you'll give him one alright... this blunt had given you time to think and fester on why you were so angry with your best friend. he was there for you for your worst moments, he held you as your body shuddered with sobs seeing your sibling lying in the hospital bed. he was there after your first date. he walked you to and from classes after she tried to spread a particularly nasty rumor about you. he was there when you cried yourself to sleep after your first boyfriend told you there is no way hed bring a girl that looks like you home. suguru has seen you in ways that nobody else in the world has. and his proximity to a person who actively tries to do you harm is just... unacceptable.

as time had went on you even decided to pour yourself a glass of wine and wait in the living room with your last blunt. you were really going to give suguru a piece of your mind...

not too long after you migrated to your living room and started smoking, you heard rapid footsteps outside your door followed by frantic knocks. you took your sweet time unraveling yourself from your blanket on the couch to head to the door. you opened it to find your best friend red, sweaty, and panting.... with a backpack that you were sure contained some kind of peace offering for you.

you wordlessly let geto into your apartment, taking a long sip from your glass and an even longer drag from your blunt. you blew out a sigh as he wasted no time in heading straight to your room. as soon as he set his bag down next to your bed, geto whirled around to face you with wide eyes filled with something you couldnt quite place.

"y/n baby what is goin on. first you wanna take the bus home by yourself knowin damn well how unsafe it is. then you wanna avoid me, ME! for weeks, not a peep from you, nada nothing! you even turned your read receipts off for me mamas, you completely iced me out. now i gotta find out that your tryna buy from other people? what the hell happened, what did i do to make you this upset at me?"

by the end of his speech, geto had inched closer and closer to you before reaching out to grab your hand and pull you with him on the bed. you huffed angrily before spitting out,

"didn't think you'd miss me too much since you've been spending so much fuckin time with mei mei lately. i saw her instagram stories suguru, i know you've been with her so don't even try to lie!" you twisted and tried to get away but he had a vice-like grip around your midsection.

"woah woah woah, these are very serious accusations sweetheart. now i haven't been with her for over a year you know that, i slept with her a few times but once you told me how it made you feel i nipped it in the bud. so what stories are you talkin about, hm?" suguru had leaned back from you so that he could make eye contact. he wanted you to know that he was telling the truth, he knew he was stupid to have slept with mei mei in the first night but one drunken night led to two which led to 5 or 6 times before you finally ripped him a new one for it. since then he had actually blocked mei mei on everything, he wouldn't even sell to her. shoko or utahime would always pick it up.

the reluctance was clear as day on your face, so geto quickly whipped out his phone to show you his blocked lists on his phone. instagram, twitter, snapchat, hell he even blocked her on tiktok, discord, and her telephone number. the longer you looked through his phone the more confused you felt. then what the hell....?

"so then what the fuck is this?" you showed suguru the screenshots you were sent of mei's story featuring him. his brows furrowed in confusion and his mouth itched low in irritation before geto let out a scoff.

"baby these are old as shit, i didnt even know she had these let alone posted them. see, this one in my car was literally the last time i messed with her. and she was only in my car because she had no other way to get home. all of these were before i got your initials done love." suguru zoomed in on the picture of him driving, and sure enough the red cursive ink was missing from the side of his face (you didnt know this but he had gotten that tattoo done that same day. dropped off mei and went straight to his shop).

you quickly scrolled through the other texts hakari sent you.... and they were all missing that red tattoo... well this is embarrassing.

"oh." while you were scrolling, geto's face had gotten softer as he watched the realization cross your features.

"yeah, 'oh' is right. now you wanna tell me what's goin on? you really been throwin me for a loop here these past few weeks. it really hurt my feelings seein you text sukuna for that zip. i mean, i know we're all friends and if you were gonna shop with anyone im glad it was him... but did you forget what i said? i promised to take care of you, so why you not lettin me?" geto peered at you with such a sad expression and you started to feel bad.

you really didn't think he would be this affected by it, yeah he'd be bitter you shopped with someone else but you thought he would get over it. you didn't know you hurt him this bad. you situate yourself and him on the bed so that you could wrap your arms around his shoulders. you knew that tonight would include a much deeper conversation with him, one that you've been steadily avoiding since you were younger. but maybe its good that this happened, this way you can both move on with your lives.

"i'm so so sorry suguru. i thought they were recent since i hadn't seen them before. i should've known better as soon as i saw mei mei posted it. i was just so mad seeing you with her. i mean, after seeing everything i had been through with her... it was so hard to keep my cool when i found out you slept with her. it made me think about a lot, a lot about us."

you shifted to grab his face and look your first love in his widened eyes,

"suguru geto, i'm in love with you. i've been in love with you for the past 6 years. honestly? i've probably been in love with you my whole life. seein her post made me realize that i'm tired of hiding it. i don't want you treating anyone else like you do me, and i don't care how selfish that sounds. no one in this world loves you like i do, i love the way you throw gummies at satoru till he wakes up. i love how you buy kento weird ties for christmas every year. i love how you say you don't snore even though you totally do. i love that you pinky promised to take care of me and haven't broken it once. but you made a vow to be with me as soon as you promised, so are you gonna to take responsibility for what you've done to me or am i gonna have to get someone else to do it?"

your confession had started to get more aggressive as you went on, but that was just how much he meant to you. the more you talked the more you realized how much you had been holding back. loving suguru was never difficult, but keeping yourself in check was. wrestling your feelings of jealousy with each of his hookups was a challenge; they never stuck around for long but each had the nerve to test you. one had even tried texting you off his phone on some shady shit trying, but you quickly told her to give him back his phone before you played double dutch with her vocal chords.

as you held sugurus face, you could see the information process. his eyes were filled with such an intense emotion it took you aback as the biggest smile you'd ever seen danced across his face. the tips of his ears started to burn bright red as he gazed up at you.

"god i'm so fucking in love with you" you quickly shove him away in embarrassment as your love lets out a loud and happy laugh.

"sugu-!" you shout, he's so fucking unserious sometimes.

"i'm serious moonlight, you think just any girl gets tatted on me? baby i have your initials, birthday, and our zodiac signs. i didn't think i'd be tellin you this, but my very first tattoo was dedicated to you sweetheart."

now you were confused, "what? no it wasn't, your first tattoo was the one of-"

"-the stick figure? no my darling, that was the first one i showed you. i didn't wanna show you this one because i knew you'd be mad it was my first tattoo. but i couldn't imagine anything but you being the first piece of permanent ink on me." suguru could see the confusion still lingering on your face, so he slid away from you for a moment to slip off his pants. you could feel your face twist as you watched suguru strip himself half naked in your room...until you saw what he was trying to show you. he had pulled up the left leg of his boxers up a little bit, revealing a ring of words coiled around his upper thigh. you and the bright red ink practically had a staring contest. your full name (first, middle, and last), sat almost like a garter around him. the thought of that.....made your head spin.

you looked back at him and briefly caught his eyes before he swiftly turned away. he looked... embarrassed? suguru rarely got embarrassed, sum bullshit about 'bein too old for that shit. i did what i did or said what i said.' this nigga think he grown or something...

before you had a chance to respond, geto beat you to it,

"look i-i know that you might be upset and i'm sorry i didn't say anything to you before. i just... i didn't know how to tell you? you were always on me about getting 'something that has meaning' to me and that's you. but shit happened and then after a while too long had passed and it felt too late? if that makes sense? and when i first brought it up you didn't like the idea but honestly how could i not? y/n i've been in love with you since we were 15. i knew as soon as i got in the game that i was gonna take care of you and i meant that. but i never thought you'd feel the same way. kento never failed to point out that all my hookups looked like you in some way, i never thought this would happen. so i was content to love you the way i used to, but i can't believe it took TOJI of all people to stop being scared of my feelings. so these past couple months i've been tryna show you that i want you. but apparently i didn't do a good enough job."

you whined in protest. by now you had found yourself situated on sugurus lap with one hand rubbing your thigh and the other tucking your head under his chin.

"i know you don't think so ma, but if i did, we wouldn't be here right now yeah? i wanted to take it slow, have you gradually fall in love with me like those movies and books i know you like reading. i just wanted to do right by you moonlight. im sorry that all this happened before i could."

suguru held you tightly and began to rub your back to sooth you. a few tears had slipped from your eyes and you wipe them on your sleeve. youd felt his hands pulls yours down, forcing you to meet his soft gaze.

"y/n, i love you. i love how you always crochet me gifts, i love how you always wear sweaters no matter the weather, i love how trust me to help you take care of your hair, i love how you can't cook a pot of rice- don't look at me like that you know damn well you burn that shit every time. i love the way you love. i love the way you love ME. you've been my number one since the day i met you, and that hasn't changed. i know my past history with my partners has been shoddy to say the least, but never for a second think that i felt for them what i've felt for you my whole fucking life. and if it's okay with you, i'd really like the chance to show you, truly, how much i mean it when i say that i love you."

suguru gazed into your eyes with a level of honesty you've only seen a few times. you wanted to give him hell for all the slow burn that he put you through... but how can you? the love of your life just told you he feels the same, the only thing you could do was say,

"suguru, you're such a fuckin idiot. stop talking and kis-"

before you could finish, your love surged forward and connected his lips to yours. kissing suguru geto was like trying to breathe underwater, you happily let him take the lead; loving the way he dominated the kiss. his lips were smoother than you'd ever imagine (all those years of reminding him to wear chapstick payed off). you could almost feel his heart pounding against yours, the previous anxiety you'd felt melting away as you both poured yourselves into a moment that was long overdue. his scorching hands had begun to move until one rested on your lower back while the other led your legs to wrap around his waist. when you had both FINALLY decided to pull away from each other and catch your breaths, suguru couldn't contain his excitement. he quickly twisted your bodies and tackled you to the bed, wrapping you in his arms with an airy laugh,

"FUCK holy shit y/n does this mean we go together? like real bad? 'cuz i've been waiting for this moment for quite literally most of my life so i'm a little geeked right now. hOLY SHIT- can i use your back as a rolling tray? that would be so hot-" you quickly cut suguru off by kissing him again, relishing in his moans as you use his hair to guide his lips on yours. as you once again separate from each other, you smile at him. your best friend. your other half. you giggle and move your hand to lovingly caress his face before responding,

"yes, suguru. we go together REAL fucking bad."

THE END

[noemilivv]

i meant to get to this a lot sooner but it slipped my mind as i completely forgot about it until i was scrolling through my posts so my apologies 😭😭

this was interesting to write for considering i’m not sure if husk or alastor would even want kids in the first place (more so alastor) but it definitely got me thinking!!

but anywho, here ya go, friend!!

Warnings: AFAB!Reader, pregnancy talk

Alastor

Alastor isn’t a very kid-loving kinda guy, but he’s very traditional, so he decided to follow tradition, and let his power travel to the next generation

You both end up having triplets, two boys, and a girl!!

Alastor wasn’t entirely sure what to expect, but he didn’t think it’d be as challenging as it is, he originally thought his magic could help him through every obstacle and he is mistaken

Once his children are in his arms, his facade drops, his usual upbeat grin turns into a small, soft smile as he cradled them, stroking his daughters face.

Alastor is practically unfazed if they wake up in the middle of the night, as I headcanon he stays awake most hours of the night, so he’s in no rush to get the babies back to bed for whatever reason (But he will, dw haha)

Despite the fact that he’s an overlord, he really doesn’t do much, so most of the time he just stays at the hotel with the kids

He doesn’t understand the concept of playing with kids, especially when their in their first couple years, so when their just learning to stand he’ll play jazz music and swing his kids around the room with him as a way of dancing, hey, it’s a win-win, y’know?

If he does have to go out, he will most likely take his kids, but if it’s more than just a 10 minute outing — he does have Charlie babysit.

Like, if he’s going to the tailors, he’ll have two kids on each side of him, holding their hands softly, and the other kid on his shoulders, as they play with his ears (which no one else is allowed to do, not even you)

He doesn’t fully understand the concept of love, as you may or may not have guessed. He loves both you (his partner) and kids in his own special way, and he knows that, whether or not he’ll admit to someone outside of you guys is debatable, but he truly does love you and your kids.

He’s not very good at understanding his kids feelings, especially when their upset. For example, let’s say your daughter is crying over a boy in her teen years, first of all, he won’t hesitate to tear him the fuck apart, but he’ll sort of just stand their and watch her for a moment, wide grin as usual, but his eyes widen in shock before softening their gaze at her for a moment.

Anywho, about the powers, Alastor is eager for his kids to get his powers — even if it’s only one of them, as this is the first reason he wanted kids (which did shift a bit as time went on)

He is very precise with his kids about how these powers work, cause their strong, even if they had only gotten a small fraction of what Al uses, cause let’s be real, he’s fuckin’ tough

He explains how they can use these powers to their advantage, he also takes this opportunity to explain how a smile is a tool, so use it. No matter how they each individually choose how to use these powers, Alastor encourages all of his kids to follow their inner bliss, whatever that is

Husk

Like in the last post with marriage, Husk really couldn’t give a shit, but if you want it, Husk is willing to give it a shot

But let’s be real, Husk was much more willing to get married then have kids

After some convincing, you two decide to try for kids, he realistically only wants one though, so don’t get your hopes up

You guys have a girl! (woohoo!)

Husk, like Al and the others I’ve written for in this scenario, he didn’t expect to love his child as much as he did

While you were asleep in the hospital bed a little after giving birth, Husk takes your daughter, and a part of him (on the inside) cries a little, he looks at her proudly, before pecking her forehead, silently vowing to fight for her forever

Husk doesn’t have a lot of time to help out with the baby, he doesn’t get a lot of breaks from the bar a whole lot, so…

But when he does get time to spend with his daughter? Their usually sleeping together.

Like Husk with hold her in his arms and they’ll lay there and snore together

Husk isn’t too sure how to bond with his daughter before she���s learned to talk but he makes it work

Once she’s old enough, sarcasm becomes a big part of him and his daughter’s relationship, constantly making fun of eachother and giving eachother shit haha

When she’s in her teens she starts to develop Husk’s powers from when he was an overlord, and he feels like he’s gonna shit his pants, but he keeps his cool cause he knows your daughter is hyped

He heavily advises to her to not use them out of fear she’ll get hurt, but if she really wants it, he’ll teach her the basics, he won’t go into the extreme shit, cause she’s young and he doesn’t want her to have more strength than control

[angel---eater]

im so curious what u mean by the vriskafication of jegbert? /genq

ive been watching the hs fandom from afar since the epilogues were dropped.

this is a rlly good question- i have a lot of thoughts and feelings abt june and how the fandom has taken to her her and is now portraying her in popular fanon. im so sorry this has gotten so long. im also sorry if i say smth you or anyone reading this disagrees with, but in my experience this is kind of inevitable when it comes to the topic of june egbert, trans characters who havent come out in canon yet, and trans headcanons as a whole. this shits personal to all of us and we all have different perspectives on transness, and oftentimes how we view transness in fiction is very much coloured by our own gendered experience.

it boils down to: can we please fucking let trans girls live. we are so fuckin weird about transfem folks and trans girls/women, even in fiction. sometimes especially in fiction, actually. especially on this gd website. if i have to see one more person defending june (and tgirl roxy) as a concept, and through that, defending real life transfems existences by talking about girldick or being a sweet docile sugary femme babygirlie kittycat, i will turn everyone into a fucking goldfish and flush you all one by one down my toilet. this, again, also extends to how a lot of the fandom handles trans headcanons in general, regardless of gender. all of what im about to say is from watching the homestuck fandom and fanon grow and change over 10+ years, basically since the beginning on this site specifically

some disclaimers for my trans resume i guess: i am intersex. i am plural. we as a system identify systemwide as transfemasuline or transneutral in an attempt to both honor and not speak over each other in terms of gender expression and individuality, while also trying to condense our existence for singlets to understand better, faster. we dont have time to explain all our shit all the time lol. we have transfems and transmascs in our system and everyone getting a fair, even chance at their preferred presentation is how we roll. we have lived a transfemasculine life. you cant put us in a single blue or pink corner, it wont work we are immune to that bullshit.

the vriskafication of june egbert is basically me trying to short-hand describe the way that ive seen some fans portray june post-transition by turning her into a mean girl[tm] type of person. there's also the roxyfication of june egbert, where other people make her a ditzy bimbo who can do no wrong because 'shes a girl now' and thats apparently how ppl still think girls should behave?? jegbert's canon personality traits need not apply anymore, apparently, bc that was icky boy behaviour. ghostbusters who? she likes shopping now. fanon june is sometimes eerily similar or exactly like vriska (fanon, woobified vriska, mind you, bc we still cant get a grasp on vriska as a fandom either) while also dressing very high femme and only high femme. because she has to perform someone elses femininity (spoiler: our own concept of what girls 'should look like' to be considered girls) instead of her dads masculinity now. shes either mean like vriska, or dumbed down like fanon roxy, who again has been watered down into a ditzy dumb girly girl who has done nothing wrong ever, bc shes 'just a girl', and bc people get Uncomfy when fictional tgirls do bad things. and oh boy has canon roxy done some bad things

as a counterpoint to my aesthetic based grievances, which are entirely personal- you can portray june egbert however you want. i personally invision her as very butch, but i could be totally wrong! im not even trying to make guesses here! this is my personal make-believe! she is not a real person and has never actually appeared as herself in canon. we dont know what junathan would/will be like during and post-transition. we dont know what an egg crack event will do to them. but some of the ways ive seen june portrayed feels........ off, personality wise. very off. and thats what i care about. it feels like malgendering in way too many cases, with the ditzy girliepop/catty girlbully thing. its straying too close to the tgirl brand of madonna/whore that tfems have to face in real life constantly. this is especially bad for tgirl roxy but i'll get to how fanon vs canon roxy is handled later

i use the word 'vriskafication' bc like vriska, june egbert (meaning tgirl jegbert, previously known as john in fandom and currently as john in canon, just to hammer it home that june and john are the same person, because some fans do seem to forget that john is living life believing shes a boy and a man right now and i dont think that should be erased) is still a pretty polarizing concept. fans either love her and disregard jegbert as ever having been john, or they disregard her as a concept in favour of how john is right now in canon. or theyre just straight up transmisogynistic about it bc they want their yaoi or their het ships. and BOY are some of the fandom not shy about that. which actually leads me into my next disclaimer:

im not including tboy/tmasc john headcanons in the above statement. i do not care about fighting over trans headcanons. i think that shit is just disrespectful and pointless and juvenial. you are fighting for nothing. june/john will not thank you for fighting for their trans rights bc they are not real and have no rights. june is not canon (yet) because she has not had that realization yet, and we dont know if/when she will. and genderbend aus have been a thing since the dawn of fandom anyway. more than one type of headcanon can exist at the same time. we are playing pretend. headcanons will never be proper representation. we are fans, not corporate entities or big directors or production teams churning out content for mass audiences. john has been considered a cis boy for FAR longer than june has been a popular concept, and you dont know how long someone has had or how close to someones heart their trans headcanon is, regardless of what flavour of trans headcanon it is. its rude. some of yall are so fucking mean for no reason other than 'you cant sit with us. on wednesdays we wear pink' rules. very intentional reference there

and i mean okay, roxy. big pink elephant in the room. no one respects or even acknowledges the fact that roxy in the Meat timeline is transmasc and currently only uses he/him, and when they do they're bullied fuckin relentlessly and ostracised from fandom spaces. ive seen entire hate campagns specifically for badmouthing transmasc roxy fans to try to get them to stop posting tmasc roxy stuff, or to see it as transmisogynistic violence akin to shooting a real trans girl live on tv. i have seen these comparisons be made on this site. ive seen others get actually violently transphobic about it back in 2019-2022, and even now. ive talked to fans who were mass dogpiled and harrassed off tumblr for liking meat!roxy's direction, or even just not publicly condemning him while having a neutral stance. i myself have been instablocked from servers and off of ppls blogs for thinking tmasc roxy is cool and a good plot point for his overall personal arc, especially in juxtaposition with roxy's pregnancy in candy, and how that affected her rship with her body and her gender. ive been called horrible things for even considering roxy to be anything but DMAB. that chapter in candy where we get a glimpse inside roxy's head about gender was beautifuly written with a lot of tact for trans people who can be or have been pregnant and enjoyed it, something that is INSANELY RARE. UNHEARD OF, EVEN, IN MEDIA. so this really isnt about trans rights or representation from my perspective. its just gendered bullying and a whole lotta white knighting from people who are majoratively not even fucking transfem.

the same notes of trans coding for roxy that fans deem only as transfem could be seen as coding for transmasculinity too. yes, including the XY thing. does anyone remember what foreshadowing is. and all of this even depends, hinges, on whether hussie intentionally wrote ANY of the human kids as trans initially or had it planned from the very beginning, which i really really really dont think she did!!! in 2009??? yeah fucking right!!!! the entire thing about roxy and jane pressuring dirk and jake into relationships is about cis girls feeling posessive of and entitled to queer boy's bodies and attention, because its something they cant have, and cis girls are seen as a group of people physically incapable of harm, which is misogyny that directly effects cis girls/womens victims. its a direct mirroring to cis boys doing the same to queer girls. and as much as i love all flavour of trans reads for the alpha kids in fandom, i dont think i wouldve appreciated it in canon. i wouldve hated it, actually. it waters down the message and makes everything far too messy and open to bad faith interpretation. we need more trans characters doing bad things in media, but the era the alpha kids section of HS1 was being published was NOT the time. an inarguably canon tgirl character preying on an inarguably queer tboy in 2011-2012? there would have been blood in the streets. i VASTLY prefer fanon interpretations when it comes to the alpha kids being trans. i trust fans way more, but i obviously still have reservations about that which is why im here writing all this

to further back this up- hussie has also openly discussed having her eyes opened to queer issues BY queer fans WHILE HS1 was still being updated!!! THATS why you can see a gradual influx of genuine queerness in homestuck as you read it!!! the vagueness of the trans coding we percieve in the text is why tboy john is still so popular!!! WAY more trans experiences, especially in childhood, are more similar than The Current Discourse bad actors will try to have you believe. please dont believe them, they're not right in the head and the ppl trying to convince you that someone has it The Absolute Worst are lying to you. we all have it bad, thats how oppressive systems work. its just in different patterns for indiviuduals. a middle class trans persons oppression can and often will look VASTLY different to a poor trans persons oppression bc different axis of oppression are at work. it depends on the type of person our oppressors label us as, they dgaf if anyone identifies as TME or TMA. thats a little beside the point but its absolutely contributed to how fans treat fictional trans characters, especially in the last few years

i hate hate hate the ideology in this fandom that one trans interpretation or headcanon is more valuable, or hits harder, or is more idk narratively transcendient or powerful than The Other, so The Other is deemed boring/bland/sauceless/whatever and deserves all the hate and takedowns and dismantling and nitpicking it gets. the fans of this Other Trans Headcanon deserve their hate and calls to kill themselves because theyre just Wrong About It. but thats not true. none of that is true. you just dont vibe with other flavours of fanmade trans narrative. and thats completely fine actually. its literally like preferring carrot cake to raspberry pie. it is on that level outside of transphobic biases, and i sincerely believe that a lot of fans start out on that level, but dip into transphobic biases because of the constant fucking weird moral panic about trans girls, and by extension, young trans people as a whole. which is not fine. whats also not fine is attacking fans of trans characters over said trans characters gender, canon or interpreted!!!

to tie this tf up bc i dont want this to go on for any longer than it has, im so so SO SO SO tired of fanon june and roxy being trans girls first and foremost over their actual characterization. and im even MORE tired of the word 'girl' being taken in fiction to mean dumb, sweet, (white)feminine, wouldnt hurt a fly, so so cuddlysoft, girlboss it up girlfriend, you cant sit with us, im such a cool bitch, im cooler than you dumb gross boy because im a girl, what personality i dont have one i dont need one because im a girl.

so much of fandom has forgotten that roxy is fucking mean and WILL ignore whatever doesnt fit her whims/wants and will plow through her closest friends and loved ones regardless of the situation at hand because of what she wants. she canonically admitted to harrassing dirk on the daily because she wanted him, because she was lonely and couldnt see past her own hurt to see that she was also hurting her friend. and oh my god, mom lalonde, worlds first abscent mother who swears up and down that she loves you really, rosie posie, its just that mommy's real hungover again and also very busy. that is BRILLIANT characterization for a female character, and its been forgotten behind the big pink bedazzled neon ITS A GIRL sign. and the same has been happening with june!!! and it sucks!!!! us transfems are just people we are JUST people. i dont want trans girl characters only point of characterization to be trans and girls!!!! i dont want talking heads and perfect cardboard cutouts in lipstick!!!! when june happens i want her to be exactly the same as when she was john because thats who i became enamoured with in HS1 and thats who i watched grow up in the epilogues and THATS who i want to see finally find their place in paradox space as herself. i want her personality intact, and i dont want to see her forget or turn her back on her childhood and teen and young adult years. i dont want june to be fanon vriskafied

[scarlet-witchery]

Day 6 — Femslash February — Cigarette Smoke

Mandy/Svet, playing with fire. (ao3)

@holymurdock @m4ndysk4nkovich @lovekenney

Svetlana had always known not to play with fire. It was one of the first lessons she learned as a girl, when her mother would put logs in their fireplace and set a cheery fire blazing in the hearth. The warmth of the flames always seemed to drive away the cold, and Svetlana had always looked forward to the first day every autumn when they brought in wood from the shed outside.

She didn't remember the first time she'd tried to touch the flames, exactly; just a sudden searing pain and her mother shouting. The lesson was still there, even if the memory had mostly faded by now. Play with fire and you'll get burned. She'd learned from that experience, made it part of the mantra she used to get through her life. Do what you have to in order to survive, but don't play with fire. Don't get burned. Smart girls lived another day, and Svetlana's mother always said she was a smart girl.

It was a hot summer evening, sticky with humidity and where they were all in as little clothing as possible so they could keep cool until the window unit could be fixed. Her piece of shit rainbow husband was on the couch, holding onto his orange boy with one arm and Yevgeny with the other. He'd taken her words to heart from their talk the morning after the christening. They had an understanding now—he did not give her bullshit about the baby, and in return she did not bother him or his boyfriend. Shit, she'd even found she liked the boyfriend well enough, once he'd managed to get out of bed and didn't act like a corpse anymore.

She found her carton of cigarettes and her lighter, grabbing them on her way out to the back porch. Even though she couldn't quite kick the habit completely, she had quickly put a rule into place that there would be no smoking or drugs done around her Yevgeny. The baby books had said it was bad for them, and Svetlana agreed. Rum was still the best for teething, though, no matter what the books said.

“I am going to smoke,” she told the boys. The orange boy—Ian—looked over at her and gave her a smile, which she returned. “Yevgeny is asleep?”

“Like a fuckin’ rock,” Mickey said. “Best part about the kid.”

Ian messed with Mickey's hair, grinning because he knew his boyfriend couldn't retaliate while holding the baby. “Yev is adorable all the time,” he said, and Svetlana kissed the top of his head in thanks.

“Carrot boy is right—Yevgeny is good baby. Put him in crib if you want, I will take him to room when I come back.”

She walked outside to the back porch, the sounds of the city at night growing louder as she opened the door. The shouts and sirens were familiar to her now; not even the occasional pop of a gunshot fazed her as she lit her cigarette and brought it to her lips. Svetlana took a deep drag, letting the nicotine burn her lungs. The red cherry of her cigarette was bright in the last light of the sunset. As she sat down at the top of the stairs, the door opened behind her, closing with a soft bang.

“Hey,” came Mandy's voice. “Mind if I sit?”

Svetlana breathed out the smoke into the sticky night air. “Not a problem.” The stairs were narrow, so the two women sat with their shoulders and hips pressed against each other. Not that Svetlana would complain about it; Mandy was beautiful, and after things had fallen apart with Nika—Svetlana wanting more than Nika could give her—she didn't mind being squished in next to a pretty girl on a night like this.

She passed the cigarette over, and Mandy accepted it quietly. Their fingertips brushed against one another's, sending a small shiver up Svetlana's spine. Mandy took a drag off the cigarette, exhaling slowly, eyes fluttering closed in the faint traces of light. She was indeed very beautiful, Svetlana mused, the sharp lines of her features still soft in a way that made Svetlana a little curious. It made her wonder what it might feel like to tease out her secrets. They were two alike, Svetlana felt certain of that, and just because you were damaged goods didn't mean someone else couldn't find value there.

They continued to pass the cigarette between them until the cherry glow dimmed and there was nothing left but a bit of ash at the tip. Svetlana crushed it out and tossed it into a nearby ashtray. Then she turned, and found Mandy already looking at her.

“Shit, I-” Mandy started to say, but Svetlana was quick, pulling her in close with a gentle touch to her chin. Their lips met, the taste of nicotine from the cigarette smoke still lingering in their mouths. Mandy was soft and pliant, nothing like her usual harsh and sharp demeanor that Svetlana admired so much. Her lips parted and Svetlana let her tongue press into Mandy's mouth, wanting to take as much as she could get.

A small sound made its way out of the back of Mandy's throat, her hand coming up to cup Svetlana's jaw. Svetlana slid her own hand into Mandy's long, dark hair, beautiful and fine between her fingers. There were a few moments of push and pull, back and forth as they explored each other's mouths; Svetlana let her free hand trace across the front of Mandy's tank top, cupping one breast and earning her a short, cut-off moan in return. It made Svetlana grin, and she wondered what other sounds she could get this beautiful girl to make for her.

Finally they pulled away, Mandy's expression like that of a deer in the headlights. “Holy shit,” she breathed. “I didn't—but you-”

“I like choice,” Svetlana told her, brushing back some strands of hair in Mandy's face. “My husband is rainbow boy. He and orange boy rub dicks together, I do not care. We are not married like normal couple. Freedom to be him, freedom to be me. And you are too beautiful not to kiss.”

Even in what little light there was left outside, Svetlana could see Mandy's cheeks turn red with a blush. “I didn't, uh…I'm not gay—well. I don't think I am.”

Svetlana chuckled, tracing her fingers along Mandy's jaw. Mandy bit her lip and looked at her with a dark, almost hungry gaze. “Your eyes, they tell different story. Maybe you just never have had chance to find out.”

“You're fucking gorgeous,” Mandy blurted out. “I always thought so. I just…” But words seemed to fail her; instead, she leaned forward and kissed Svetlana again. There was the faintest trace of mint gum that mixed with the taste of cigarettes, and Svetlana smiled against Mandy's lips.

“Stay with me tonight,” Svetlana offered. It was a leap in the dark, and maybe it was another way of playing with fire. Maybe it was a chance for happiness, too—a chance for her to carve out something for herself in this life. She hadn't had much of that before, not since she was ten years old. America was a land of choice, a land of freedom. Freedom to choose—and she wanted to choose this beautiful girl.

She pressed Mandy up against the railing of the staircase, a hand on her hip; their position was somewhat awkward, but Svetlana didn't care, and it seemed Mandy didn't, either. She ran a hand through Svetlana's hair, twirling its waves around her fingers as her other hand cupped the back of her neck to pull her in closer.

“Yeah,” Mandy breathed, once they'd finally broken apart. “Yeah—I want that, too.”

Svetlana grinned, pulling them both to their feet. They stumbled inside the door, Mandy laughing even as she nearly tripped over her own feet. The boys had fallen asleep on the couch, Yevgeny in his bassinet on the floor—safe and sound. Svetlana turned to Mandy, taking her hands and kissing her fingers. She caught Mandy's gaze, saw her breath hitch at the gesture, and felt an ache throughout her whole body.

If this was playing with fire, maybe it wasn't the worst thing to get burned.

[boblzzysfreak]

Alfafa Cunt, it’s funny the way you keep calling me a gay man. It’s because you think men are superior and you admit, over and over again, that I am better than you. I am old woman. Old American women talk to and about you like this now. Trump cunts, you and your chump pig friends.

Less than one month, but it’s just started. Have a shit stain cousin still calling me about his Mothers funeral, that Trump pig will bury his worthless whore mother alone. She will burn in hell for all eternity. He will burn in hell for all eternity. How many years before Trump cunts like you realize you have already killed yourselves? Still, it’s better that you suffer and die now and you sure are. Jesus, have you seen the numbers on you pigs and early death?

I used to wish you all would get tattoos, so I would never mistake you for human beings. You pigs really do have smell though. That’s the smell of damnation.

My kids went to a party at the apartment of a friend from HS last night. That kid’s Trump parents kicked him out. They have scores of friends in this situation. You all insist on being alone and belligerent all the time. That young man will be here later this week. Again, like last time, I will counsel that kid. As I do several times a year now - I will show him how to fill out a FASFA, how to apply to the nearby state university. Most of them take my advice and do Biology. You can get med tech job with an associates and it’s easy to grown incrementally PT after. Once their parents kick them out and that tax year passes, they qualify for Pell grants, the state will match and FT tuition is covered if they can maintain a GPA. I make sure they are all registered to vote, but it’s already done in most cases. The only thing their parents teach them. Most of the boys aren’t registered for selective service, which honestly baffles me. Is that just part of being a traitor to America now, or are you fools really so poorly informed that you don’t know they have to do it? Anyway, thank all the cat-faced whores you scream about nonsense with for kicking their children out just in time for human men and women to save them from Putin. It’s like China sending us their girl babies for years while their population numbers crashed.

You tell your young people that no program in America will help them unless they are <opposite of whatever they are.> The white ones tell me the programs are all for black kids. The brown ones tell me it’s only for illegal immigrants. That’s my favorite, how can there be special anything for anyone whose status cannot be proven? It’s among the stupidest lies you spout. When I show them how to apply for ANYTHING they are amazed. You cunts spend all your time telling yourselves how oppressed you are, how everything works against you, how you need a gun to shoot your way out of the grocery store, and you fill your children’s heads with these paranoid delusions instead of anything real, anything helpful. You are a black hole of despair and misery.

Wow, wish I could come down to your level of fuckin stupidity so I could understand what the fuck your rants mean. The way you put words together is brilliant, you sound exactly like a fuckin stupid ass trying to talk on an Amazon helpline. The only black hole around is your mother's pussy you little bitch. Like I said before, I'm bored with your demofaggot ass, good to know I can still get to you. Get ready, the orange man cometh soon demofags!

[oddygaul]

The Boy and the Heron

God damn this movie is a hot mess. The pacing is all over the place; the tone is all over the place. It feels like it’s trying to be a metaphor for a dozen different things, but none of them come through particularly well, and it ends up being a big, unpolished jumble of ideas. Plus, in its eagerness to foreground those deeper themes, fundamental things like character motivations, goals, and narrative cause-and-effect are left by the wayside, leading to much of the movie feeling like a disconnected series of events with little tying them together.

I understand the desire for an artist to make something that’s solely for themselves, or to write a story with the primary goal of deeper thematic resonance; in my opinion, though, if what you're writing has gotten to the point where the basic A to B plot of your story doesn’t really make sense, I think you may have gone too far.

Now, a work that’s all subtext, no plot can work if the vibe is there - that’s pretty much the definition of a tone piece, and I fuck with a lot of tone pieces. In this case, though, I did not think the vibe was there. The tone bounces from a measured, somber meditation on grief, to a wondrous journey through a strange land, to a fast-paced goofy caper when the parakeets get involved… I didn’t feel much of a coherent tonal throughline.

Okay, so fine, the themes?

A lot of people are saying the whole movie is about Miyazaki’s struggle with leaving behind his legacy without a direct heir. While that’s a compelling idea, that subplot is introduced roughly… *checks notes* 5/6ths of the way through Boy and the Heron, so you wouldn’t exactly call the movie a very effective vessel for that message, would you?

Was it about Mahito seeing his mother again, to move on from her death? She miraculously appears but they barely talk. Is it about accepting his stepmom into his life? Well, she’s gone for half the movie. Is it about rejecting fantasy / escapism to live in the real world? Well, okay, but the stepmom is the one that went in there in the first place and Mahito hated it from the jump, so no one really changed their minds here.

Speaking of the stepmom, it’s weird as hell that Mahito’s process of accepting his dad immediately marrying his dead wife’s sister is treated like a personal journey. No, that’s a weird fucking thing to have happen to you, and you better believe a kid is gonna be fucked up about that for a while. I understand this isn’t out of the norm for the setting / time period, but it clearly bothers Mahito. I don’t see how a lonesome, magical journey to another world is the right salve for those feelings as opposed to like, a frank and open conversation with his dad.

—

Miyazaki once famously said that the problem with the modern anime industry is that no one draws from real life anymore - that character designers learn how to draw anime girls only by copying other anime girls, turning the entire industry into a grisly moe ouroboros devoid of any authenticity.

What the fuck is this, Hayao? Did you design this by looking at a real human being? Or is this a baachan based on a previous Ghibli baachan which was itself based on another Ghibli baachan? The moe ouroboros tolls for us all, Hayao. It tolls for us all.

—

Having vented those frustrations, there’s a lot of gorgeous stuff in this movie, of course.

The stepmom’s house is so neat - the modern, western-style house built straight onto the classical Japanese architecture, Winchester-mansion style.

As opaque as Mahito was to me, it’s funny as hell how aggro the kid is. It was fuckin on SIGHT with the heron, bro.

Everyone is so stoked about these birds shitting on them all the time

The world of the tower had a very different vibe to Ghibli’s classics that was pretty cool - a very Greek / Elysium feel to much of it, a place stuck between life and death.

This is the bougiest way I’ve ever seen someone drink water

these weird fucks

—

When taking the lore at face value, it’s wild how this movie is basically an Annihilation + Bloodborne lovechild. So basically an extraterrestrial meteor crashes from the sky, and begins terraforming the area around it; as it does so, it distorts not only space, but time itself. Much like the wildlife in Area X, the parakeets enter the tower and are drastically altered to serve their environment’s needs. The way the tower seems to hold onto alternate versions of people that have entered and keeps them there, stuck outside of time, is reminiscent of what happens to the Southern Reach trilogy’s research team.

And then on top of that, we have the great uncle calling Mahito’s stepmother inside the Nightmare of Mensis, excuse me, the tower, so that she can give birth inside, allowing the child to ascend and become the ruler of the realm?

Oh Amygdala, oh amygdala! Have mercy on the poor heron.

Just saying, ‘the Heron isn’t actually magic, it’s merely a lookalike biological simulacra of a heron created by the reality-warping crash-landed U.F.O.’ wasn’t on my bingo card going into this movie. lol

[eternal-savvy-blog]

What's your favourite artist?

Oh many!!! Buckle Up cos I'm going all in on this one I'm gonna include SFW and NSFW artists haha. I'll mark what each of them do so you aren't blind sided. And of course there wont be NSFW images linked here. Their names will have links to either their main Twitter, or other primary site you can find their art. And I'll @ their tumblr if I know it below that For sure Junji Ito for horror stuff. That almost goes without saying and I don't think I really need to link his stuff xD he's an absolute titan of horror art

MackleNG (SFW & Horror)

Absolutely amazing linework and generally incredible vibes. They are drawing a webcomic called CHOKEPOINT i have been meaning to check out but I adore their art just in general. I've been using a lot of their art as inspo lately and can't get enough of their cyberpunk designs, horror vibes, and use of pops of colour to emphasise and showcase their incredibly in depth line work and details!

QSY (SFW & NSFW) @qsycomplainsalot

I continue to come back to their art and they are also a huge inspo for me. I'm generally trying to find a way to adapt their colouring into my own style because it's absolutely gorgeous! The way its simultaneously crisp and crunchy, while also soft and expertly blended! It's like candy for my eyes! Add into it their fantastic expressions, excellent pallette choices, incredible weaponry, and of course some excellent NSFW with really great curves, colour, and characters, and they're easily one of my top 3 artists

Tyto_Alba (SFW & NSFW)

Do you like Mecha? Do you like guns? Do you like cute girls and/or boys!? Well, hot shit, me too!!! You NEED to check out Tyto_Alba! Straight up, another one of my top 3. He has legitimately changed the way I do my lineart, the way i draw soft shapes (like butts and stuff :3c) and my god the mechs as well! I legitimately had a hard time finding a good singular piece of their art to use here cos they are so fantastic at both sexy art AND mechs that i really had to find something that showed off a little of both! Something that I personally have noticed with their art as well is just how fuckin incredible they are at drawing HANDS! I am obssessed with their skill with hands and I hope to match up to them some day in that regard! I feel like I'm getting there but I LOVE the way theyre always so Shaped and well posed. As well as how detailed they manage to be without being too attention grabbing unless intentionally in the focus! What's more, they use simple colours so effectively! Much to be loved here! And of course, their NSFW content is top tier! Really excellent soft shapes and squish and really fantastic context and intensity!

RizDraws (NSFW)

Listen... LISTEN OKAY!!! We're hitting the NSFW exclusive part of the list and you have to understand that NSFW artists are just as incredibly skilled as any other artist and that porn is FINE AND NORMAL! Having sexual interest is not unusual. Having a desire to draw these things is a human and regular thing. I could talk for paragraphs about how puritanism is harmful and ultimately denying something natural and inherently human and anyone telling you otherwise has ulterior motives. But that's not what this post is about. I say this because an artist showcase tends beat around the bush with this stuff but I am unwilling to be vague about this. NSFW art is valid and, what's more, Important! That being said, Riz is incredible! The squish! The faces! The fluids! The Dicks! All so good! They somehow straddle the line between pinups and porn in such a brilliant way that I would be happy to have their art on my wall and I'm not kidding haha! The particular way they colour with the chalky texture is often sought after and I see why! Personally I don't look to emulate it myself but I most certainly enjoy looking at it! The way Riz uses their lines and their particular style of chalky colour to make the squish of clothes against flesh really look real! It's somethin else!

Andava (NSFW)

Now where Riz does the mid point between pinups and porn, Andava is definitively porn haha! xD That being said. Hot damn dude! In particular the way they do bodies and have a variety in body types, shapes of boobs and faces. Especially faces. Their characters are really good too and it's very easy to develop a favourite (for me it's Erika and Alexis) There's a reason people have cosplayed their characters and it shows! Absolutely love the variety, the situations/positions they draw! Theyre incredible as making stuff feel messy as well! Highly recommend browsing through their stuff and finding a favourite OC of theirs haha! I was lucky enough to get a commission off them years ago when they were still fairly small in terms of following. So long ago that Tumblr still allowed porn at the time haha! I dont think Discord even existed yet! Still wanna grab a commission off Andava of the same character one day! ALRIGHT I think I will leave it there for now! I could absolutely go longer and talk about even more of my fave artists and why I like them, and how they've inspired me but I get the feeling I should hold off haha (unless of course people would like to see more) I hope this has thoroughly answered your question. Though I know for a fact i will kick myself over not mentioning an artist i should of included later but forgot to lol

[rodent-king-buunii]

Were more than halfway done, this is eps 9-12. I put pictures + screenshots in this time.. Bare w me here

TW: Death

Episode 9:[not much happens]

The street clip is back

The real life footage is fuckin trippy stop!

THE BEAR ONSIE MADE A COMEBACK! LETS GOO!!

Alien Freddy Kruger has made an appearance..

Oop- damn she found a Knight..

O no.. what is she bout to do w track 44?

NOT HER PARENTS GETTIN BUSY WHILE THEIR CHILDRENT ARE FUCKIN DYIN N KILLIN!?

THE SKINWALKER IS STILL BABBLIN BUT IS MAKIN SOME WORDS?!

The boy lives!! HE GAVE HER A SMOOCH?! N PUT HIS FUCKIN GUM IN HER MOUTH

Not her mimickin the sister’s babble on the banana phone

This episode has a lot of info + big words i don't entirely understand, i just know that Lain is bein duped in the wire like a deepfake matrix

WHO IS THIS FUCKIN DUDE?!

Episode 10:

THE FUCKIN STREET CLIP[i feel like i should have a counter for this shit too]

AYO SO THE DUDE AT THE END OF THE LAST EP LOOKS LIKE IS MONOKE HAD A BROTHER BUT THAT BROTHER WAS JUST… NOT HITTIN LIFE RIGHT?! THIS MFER SUPPOSED TO BE GOD?! HE LOOK LIKE A EMO NEANDRITHAL

GIRL GOD HAS ME KICKIN N SCREAMIN IM--

Not them beefin by readin each others minds out loud… this is the shittiest fuckin battle ive ever seen HELP

Why have a desk for someone that dosent exist?

Lain havin an existential crisis part 12..

They made this whole fake ass family to keep this creature[Lain] in a state of calm? She is some sort of experiment, her state of mind and body are separated. Like some sort of computer simulation that has made itself believe that its real..

As if she was a real girl but somethin happened n her consciousness was uploaded into an A.I. n is remembering that this fake world is hers, shes the god of her own world.. She is everythin n nothin

Dude2 finally made an appearance but bout to get EUTHANIZED!!

NOT HIS SECRETARY FINDIN HIM

DUDE 3 GOT FUCKED UP N GOT A BULB SHOVED IN HIS MOUTH HELP-

O shit the mom that the delivery dude was tryna get w got fucked up too

Kid didnt even notice…

The men in black are supposed to be the good guys but o my fuckin gods they talk like super villains- i liked it better when they didnt speak

They denounced the emo God for both worlds.. He cant be Hannah + Miley anymore

WHY THIS MFER LOOK LIKE EMINEM?!

Wait okai so it made sense when the dad said he loved her but when Eminem said it it made me confused??

Mfer look like the one meme

God is a dick dude “i created you” “love me” “theres no one else”

LAIN FIGHTIN BACK

Episode 11:[empty episode]

Openin up w/, what i can only assume is, Lain hookin up to her set in this empty house she once called a home.

It feels like a music video you vaguely remember seeing as a kid, is about to start.

Were Lain + the dead classmate actually friends?

Were any of her friendships real?

Was any of it real?

After 8 straight minutes of never starting a music video we got to the plot?

Emo god is back-- fucker

THIS BITCH IS SOFTWARE?! IS THAT WHAT YOURE TELLIN ME?!

She understands but doesnt at the same time + i feel her for that.

The dead girl + the guy from the club are playing angel + devil on her shoulder, playing the suicide game + trying to vaguely convince her not to..

Alice’s teacher “rumor” is still in hot pursuit

ALICE IS BEING STALKED BY FREDDY KRUEGER?!

O its just Lain bein weird.. Nvm..

She is the wired

Love that for her

Shit Lain passed it on like a fuckin virus

Episode 12:

“I was overthinking things all along” --Lain

What a fuckin mood

THE FUCKIN STREET CLIP IS BACK BBY!!!!

Alice is onto Lains ASS

+ LAIN KNOWS

Fuck Lain is bein creepy af usin her power to creep out her “best” friend

Taro is still up on the “i kissed an angel” thing-

Lets all love Lain

The man is tryna blend everyone + everythin usin Lain

THIS IS THE FUNNIEST FUCKIN DEATH SCENE WTF?!

WHY ME MOVIN LIKE THAT?!

HE SAW LAIN + FUCKIN SPAZZED TO DEATH

EMENEIM DOES TOO FUCK I LIKED HIM

Alice comes to the Ikura residence + walks though this trashed deserted house. Hits some gas, sees the skinwalker w/its head split in half, still babbling in search for Lain

Lain sleeps in a cocoon bed like i do :>

“Watching what?” Lain: :>

Lain thought she was loving Alice, Alice thought Lain was bat shit outta her mind + hated her.

Theyre connected without having connected

“Alice, i love you” girl don't-

Alice is a better friend than i am…

FUCKIN EMO GOD NEEDS TO FUCK OFF MY GUY

LET LAIN GO SHES SCARING ALICE ITS NOT A BUG SHES HUMAN DAMNIT

ITS NOT A BUG, SHES HUMAN

ALICE SAW THE HAND OF GOD

Not Lain talkin back to EMO GOD

I love her questionin him, tellin him that theres a god before him

Lain fuckin leaves him to go with Alice so he threw a fit + created a body… fuckin pussy

These girls watched as a false got destroyed himself

Death Count

+5[theres no telling how many global Knights there were]

+1

+3[?]

New total ≈19

Thoughts:

I shouldnt have laughed as much as i did during episode 10 +12. God was givin v musty.

||P1||P2||P4||

[campgender]

ROY KENT? toxic masculinity-roy fuckin kent? oh hell nah, sorry in advance, this is gonna be long, you just jinxed yourself mentioning that. ;_; whoever said that did NOT watch enough of that boy because his masculinity is beautiful and there's genuinely nothing toxic about it at all. like, we did not watch him suck all his bitchiness up to have a relationship with his girl just for him to get called toxic. not to mention...

FIRST on my list of his display's of butchness: this is Roy "I gave my girlfriend head while she watched a video of me crying my head off" fuckin Kent! Y'all are not gonna pin him for toxic masculinity, c'mon. If that ain't the most butch-ass shit I've ever heard of...

SECOND: I'd put a lot more weight into the suggestion of toxic masculinity if he'd stayed the way he'd been at the beginning of the show but this is a man who grew a fuck-ton even in just the first couple episodes, not to mention throughout the show (which I haven't finished).

He's not a bully, which is surprising for such a hyper-masculine character. Hair as far as the eye can see, with a beard, furry thighs and arms, a low growly voice-But for all his swearing and other foul language, he isn't a bully. He doesn't pretend, he says no, and he sets clear boundaries, but even with children who he has loads of power over, he's very careful to never cross the line into bullying. He jokes, clearly knowing the children, barking orders and playing ball. He has a niece and even though he doesn't understand the book wrinkle in time, he reads it to her and only after getting three quarters through does he go to ted to demand what the fuck its supposed to be about.

THIRD: the way sometimes he looses speech and yet he STILL. FUCKING. COMMUNICATES. beautiful. Which rolls straight into FOUR, which is the way he communicates! He's very clear, very blunt, obviously. But its not just that. Its how as we get to know Roy Kent, more and more, we see how when he gets overwhelmed or annoyed, he often steps back from the situation so that he doesn't blow his temper at someone he likes or someone who doesn't deserve it...which is very, dare I say it? chivalrous! Its not a word you think when you think of roy kent, but he is! He's chivalrous! He isn't quite comfortable around rebecca, think of early season 2, but when he sees she needs it, he tells her she deserves the goddamn world in a partner, not just "fine", and he didn't tell her that because he had to! Keeley would've left it and he could've gotten away with a minimal answer. He told her because she deserved to hear it and he knew that and he's a fucking kind person!

just like that time at the end of season 1 when he and keeley were photographed by that man and he stole the photos and then handed them to keeley and gave the man back his camera. he could've smashed the fuckin camera. he's exactly the type of person to smash the camera! but he didn't. why? because they cost a shit-ton of money and because he wanted keeley to have photos of their first date. ;_; its called CHIVALRY. which. is. BUTCH. AS. FUCK. need i go on?

roy kent's masculinity is beautiful, it's a joy to behold, it's butch as hell, thank you, i hope you don't mind me dropping an essay in your askbox, sorry abt that.

OH SHIT YOU HAVEN’T FINISHED IT. you haven’t seen what they did to my bestie in the finale 😭😭 how they MALIGNED his NAME — if you do watch it come hmu though bc holy shit am i still livid.

anyway. yes to all of this!!!!! especially how he communicates while also losing speech <3333 i get so fucking upset every time someone calls him repressed bc like. he literally isn’t!!! he’s very aware of & in touch with his emotions!!!!!!!!!! what he is is stoic & it’s bc 1) he’s autistic 2) y’all are assholes. like. i feel like fucking crying every time i think about the scene in s1 when he’s just been benched: keeley’s excited but kind of impatient “oh, so you are ready to talk about real stuff now!!” and the way it makes it seem like a bad thing for him to need some time to process. & then her really sarcastic & dismissive response when he says how scared he is of losing what the entire fucking country has made his sole identity:

I think men that feel sorry for themselves are so sexy. And if you start telling me how hard it is that you play a game for a living, I think I might come.

i see fucking red!!!!!!! the show multiple times (including in the finale) belittles his feelings and/or throws away his characterization and then treats that like a #Feminist moment. & like in the previous example, yeah keeley prompts phoebe to say how she sees roy & that’s a sweet moment, but keeley never actually apologizes or says how she sees or thinks of roy outside of sex.

& then in s3 honestly his apology letter to her made me feel ill. like there’s a difference between owning your shit — which i do think she deserved an apology for him breaking up with her out of nowhere — and saying everything is your fault. that’s not growth, that’s still self-hatred. and like i understand keeley was going through a lot but i don’t think it was fair to him for him to confess his love & her fuck him while like. presumably knowing she doesn’t want to get back together.

i’m also so fucking livid about the show comparing roy and FUCKING RUPERT????? in that scene, again for some sort of shallow #GirlBoss moment. fuck that fuck the writers fuck like most of the fan attitudes i’ve seen.

also the way the “roy is sorry for not understanding keeley” scene is played — yeah, he should’ve communicated better, but she just started yelling at him out of nowhere & revealed she’d been complaining about him being clingy to all their colleagues. and she never apologizes for not talking to him sooner & her bottling her feelings until she exploded at him???? instead he apologizes for doing….. something she’d never told him she had a problem with.

i’m working on a fic about this aspect but the show has no fucking sympathy for his becoming disabled and it’s so transparent. obviously ted lasso in general is really bad at acknowledging systemic issues — “just be a goodfish!!” :))) — it’s a liberal show & you should overcome adversity by individual work ie therapy & forgiving your oppressors. but like there’s literally no acknowledgment after that scene when he gets shut down by keeley in s1 of how ableism affects roy’s self-image.

as a disabled person whose mobility impairment started with a knee issue in sports, i also think the show did a fucking shit job with his disability in general. like they played it for a laugh — you might not have watched 3x11 yet so feel free to skip this paragraph but “i played injured all the time / you can’t go up stairs!!” followed by jamie still playing injured to, what, make a point about forgiveness?? shows how fucking seriously they took that, and roy was walking up stairs earlier in that very episode.

similarly, “everybody run to the bus… except roy!” earlier in s3 was an emotional moment for me bc like oh they’re acknowledging how this affects his life!! …..and then they showed him running (on pavement!!!) with jamie all the fucking time. like sure not every knee issue is the same as mine, okay, whatever, but either be consistent or throw in a line about him having a good day today or something. jesus fucking christ it’s so ableist & careless & disrespectful.

anyway my hot take is that as they’re written, keeley & roy shouldn’t be together not because, as brenden fucking hunt put it, “he has work he needs to do on himself first,” but because she doesn’t respect him & fundamentally you can’t make compromises with people who think how you are is wrong.

i do really like keeley especially in s1, i think a lot of this is fuck-ups on the writers’ parts that keeley were she a real person either wouldn’t have done or would’ve apologized for. but as it’s written? fucking yikes.

anyway that got really off track from your thoughts lol but i absolutely adored reading this, it was a delight & i would love to hear more any time 💓💓💓

[sentientgopro]

Alright, later today will be the one week mark since cracking, and its wild how much has changed and how much has stayed the same. Sure, I still can't actually transition for quite a long time, but just the realisations and understanding this has brought me has been life changing. To focus less on the trans part for a second, Its fucking shocking how much having something to look forward to has affected me. I never noticed how bad shit was before until its gotten better. To see the extent to which a lack of positive reasons to Carry On actually affected me on a day to day basis. But I don't wanna dwell on that, Im getting shit done and am catching up with where I should be academically. Reaching Uni keeps looking easier and easier. And yes, I still have times where I feel how I felt before. i make a small mistake, get berated for it, and wonder why I fuckin bother Carrying On. But even at that time, I know its temporary, I know itll pass, and it does. That wasn't happening before, it just stuck.

As I uncover more about myself, Im noticing more and more dysphoria, beit feelings I didnt notice before or things I did notice and found other explanations for. I know this is gonna get worse, but fuck it, I can actually recover from things now. Ill manage. Things aren't actually changing right now, I cant safely transition yet, but as I said, things also have changed.

So far this has primarily been a wider reflection on the past week but I do have something new to add. Ive noticed that, at times, I have felt like being masc is right, that having a deeper voice is right, etc. And I wondered, is it some kinda fluidity? NB? Its only certain situations, most of the time I do feel fem, so what's up with that?

And then I think about a show I'm watching right now, Gen V, and it all makes sense.

Jordan Li's powers aren't exactly clearly defined, but basically, they switch between a man and woman at will (Its not full shapeshifting, the power is binary), as well as having other general superpowers depending on which they are, making for some cool fight scenes. But outside of the fight scenes, the way the show explores which they choose is interesting (and the show DOES explicitly state what Im about to say.)

Its made clear that Jordan is more comfortable as a girl, which their parents hate. Theres a decent chunk of one episode clearly about "HES our little boy, what happened to HIM" while Jordan, originally a guy in this scene, switches infront of their parents to be more comfortable.

So why, outside of combat, do they choose to be masc?

They do it when they try to make a point. Appear authoratative and/or respectable. When interacting with people who they don't think would like them as a girl (e.g their girlfriend, Marie the protagonist, who isn't explicity bi, atleast not yet, and Jordan says they would rather be comfortable as a girl with Marie but they don't know if shes okay with it.)

And I can't help but think that makes TOTAL sense. I feel more masc at work when I want to appear strong, capable, and, dare I say it, "cool". When I'm talking to people I wish respected me more. When I'm with friends, people I know are allies and some queer, I feel more fem. I don't think I'm fluid, I think this I feel the same kinda way as Jordan.

The key takeaway from this for me is that genuinely, representation, especially in the most random places, is so good. Its interesting watching it with my parents because its a world where superpowers are very real, and this person CAN switch at will on every level. And they have to drop the "not a real man/woman" argument and struggle to find a different reason to hate what they see. The representation characters like Jordan provide says "Okay, if we play by your rules and portray what a """real man/ woman""" looks like, this is the REAL situations queer people face and the way they are treated. And you still agree with the people treating them that way. Your problem is NOT how much they are actually like their chosen gender." And its good being in something unexpected. My parents would not watch your standard kinda "queer media", yknow, stuff like heartstopper or whatever (idk, I dont either so idk what Im talking abt.) But putting good, well written rep in a spin off of a show where a dude in a trench coat shoves a bomb up an invisible dudes ass and he says cunt alot exposes them to things they would not otherwise be exposed to.

And thats only talking about the minimal effect this rep has on people who disagree with it. Much more important is the exposure for queer people who don't know it yet, or don't know how they feel, and it provides understanding, something to look at and say "thats me". Honestly, Im gettin a little tired of writing this rn, anything I could say about that aspect of representation has been said a million times already, So Ill leave it there.

So, to conclude, with the absolute hardest line ever said in a show, from Jordan Li:

"Tag team cocksplosion."

Okay maybe not the best choice.

[jaythelay]

Y'know I'm trans myself and I just thought about saying "you silly girl" to another trans person and it just...doesn't...feel right? It feels sexual, or insulting, but I'd call any male a "silly boi" no hesitation like hell yeah we're all silly bois, I'll even call them a silly girl occasionally if I'm feeling wacky, who knows, I'm like a thumbtack that fell in your bed that you can't find.

I think a large reason there's such a hostile initial reaction of disdain for primarily MtF's is that, even now there's apart of me that's socially constructed to stop and go: "Oh, oh no, don't say that to a woman" while it's honestly rather normalized to just be gay with the bros sometimes.

But being gay with women, especially when you're actually not at all a hyper aggressive Magat, feels like flirting, feels like belittlement, and feels oddly taboo. There's a language barrier where what I want to say I can't and what I do say may be bad with a specific person.

I never really gave any BoD about living being's differences from birth to present to be critical of their character or empathy. But growing up you're basically told "don't ever, EVER, do xyz to womans" as an actual toddler and it just builds up this idea that like, oh, I should just avoid that obvious hurdle because I might turn out to be a bad person, I'm a Literal Toddler, so I best go with my gut on this!

Reinforce this with failing to talk with or ask a gorl to do the date, meaning ostracization (that cud b 4evr!1!!) and you got a recipe for "How the FUCK do you talk to a women" for a shit load of socially awkward kids who got to learn emotional regulation through their mothers and thus all women must be like that and shit ya'll being a man sucks. (not projectio- NOT PROJECTI-)

As a VERY young'un, I always thought it was just universal that guys wanted to be gorls and gorls wanted to be guys, but primarily that I'd prefer being female, but without the restrictions placed upon them. I basically empathized with both situations because to me, it just felt like women would be left to do the dumbest shit and most times yeah, they fuckin' hated it. Thank god, that's not what being a women is!

I don't really know how you even begin to express that to anyone to get them to understand that there's issues in all aisles because humanity is building off some shit foundations but by golly they're foundations we can build off of regardless. (The meaning of life is other life, we build off the foundations of others so that others may build off our foundations)

With guys I just don't have that "Wait, don't say that" taboo feel in my brain, and NO I'm not trying to blame anyone other than social constructs and whatever area I personally grew up in and events in life that happened only and specifically to me to reach this point in my life that you hadn't.

I think this also creates another issue where it becomes "who can be shittier and more...-" wow I wanted to say woke but the left co-opted it for some reason, to me it just means conspiracy theorist, not... an empathetic normal person? Idunno. "conspiratorial to justify it for everyone"

If ya ask me, that's a LARGE reason why guys struggle to talk to gorls. They're not allowed to be gay around them, they're not allowed to be vile either and good honestly, this is a men's issue. They're just not willing to take a, since birth reinforcement, risk, and it will internalize for alot of them, a fear that a mistake could be the end of your "good person" badge, however realistic that is/n't.

What it comes down to, to me, is most men probably aren't gonna speak up on alot of issues because it's tied into their friend groups, and let's be honest, if you lose a friend, you're probably -1 for a whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiilee. And then you'll have no one to grow with and reinforce the path you've taken. Again, it's all ostracization. Alot of us got lucky to be around people that straightened our bullshit and called out our bigotry and "dark humor".

I don't...know how to word this, but with how bad it's looking for R's in the upcoming elections, I think we're gonna REALLY need to buckle down on removing the MAGA virus of division, by opening a path for people in a cultural way. I'm guessing here, but I'd imagine most righty's think they're perma-banned from leftism, and most of them? Can't be helped. But we can bring alot of people into a brighter world, not by softening our language or being easier on fascism, but by saying, You Can Change, We Believe In You. When that level of ostracization of self-awareness hits them? They'll have no where else to go but normalcy if they're reasonable and open to growing.

It's not for one reason, but a variety of complex, nuanced, and difficult to confront paths to consider. None of us are to blame, we're all just on the path of growth and thinking in a desert of doubt surrounded by mother nature's righteous fury of confusion. And someone keeps breaking bottles everywhere.

Yes whatever I forgot to mention, you should elaborate upon, and whatever lengths behind you that I am, I'd love to see that path enlightened. And yeah I definitely could've worded that better. Ngl man I have only had 2 hardees burgers the past 5 days due to tooth/mouth issues stemming back to 2019 that no doctor...could or would, fix. I'll be able to eat again tho soon no worries bb.

[king-of-knives]

I watched kalki and the plot they chose is amazing like actually kalyug hindu dystopia sounds like a delight especially the folklore shit

BUT THE EXECUTION THE DIALOUGES FUVKKKMMKK FUCKIN HELLLL

how can they take such a beautiful wonderful amazingly talented cast and such a gorgeous honey nectar plot AND SERVE FUCKING BULL SHIT

This is why I hate so many bollywood movies because as an avid reader the script makes me want to take a dhakan bhar pani and drown in it

BECAUSE THAT STORYLINE HAS SO MUCH POTENTIAL BUT FUCKKK THE SCRIPT WTF WAS THAT NO ONE TALKS LIKE THAT

While we're at this Im going to talk about shaitaan too,

The original movie was so much better written without all the fucking demon and magic shit , the original plot was on hypnotism and it made so much more sense and all the actors served in the original version the dialogs were so different, i love madhavan but fuvk nooo everything he did and said fell short to the original gujarati actor, the actual sense of fear you feel while watching even just the trailer of the original version cannot be felt throughout the whole hindi adaptation, the girl, she carried that adaption, she had done such a wonderful job in original version even her acting is watered-down in the hindi version, it is so much more tamer, this just shows that the execution the direction the script and especially the impact of original language matters so much in any media, because I'd rather watch anything with subtitles than dubbed version, because you get so much more accuracy in subtitles, a script written in a language never carries over the emotions interpreted in the translation so well, and if you don't understand both languages and culture well whatever translation you make isn't gonna be equally amazing, a dubbing, a remake done while changing the base of a movie is never a good idea, and i feel so fucking sad that no one who hasn't seen vash will ever be able to see it because all its rights were brought off and it got taken off all platforms fuckkkk even the title isn't just translation how do you go from vash to shaitaan idk .... vash was a masterpiece made by such a dedicated cast and director the script was soo good the characters were so well written and all of it is just gone because it was sold for commercialization it sucks I hate it they watered down everything and THEY TOOK AWAY THE REAL MOVIE COMPLETELY

I always go to watch movies and come out so disappointed with the script and execution, and sometimes even the direction is shit because what in the holy shit was soty all parts, and people talk about how some actors especially nepotism ones are shit at acting during thier debut and troll them so much but have they ever thought that maybe sometimes it's the direction at makes them look like shitty actors? Because do you really think alia from soty just suddenly had an epiphany and gave highway, do you really think alia who gave masterpieces like raazi, darlings, dear zindagi, gully boy, gangubai, just had terrible acting and dialogs in bhramastra???

There are soooo many things that make or break the movie and the most 3 important are direction acting and script , you fuck up one it's gone you might earn money but no one is gonna watch it again, I'd rather choke on my foot than watch the boy who played Ajay devgans son in shaitaan call him pops BECAUSE WTF IS WRONG WITH THEM WRITERS NO ONE CALLS THEIR DAD THAT it is blasphemy that's what it is

And why was the villain in kalki giving voldemort?? Why was prabhas giving Ironman? It's like they fit so much in that movie without a head and tail, you need a backstory look at bahubali learn something everything needs a fucking backstory, the way they rushed through bhairavas backstory, they way Deepikas character just drops in out of nowhere, the way kaira and that other girl from rebels just comes in to die immediately you cannot possibly imagine your audience to feel anything about both of thier death because we didn't even get enough time to feel anything for them to even feel thier presence in the movie, those could've been such hit Melo part only if they'd give them time, kalki would've done so much better as a well scripted series that's what i think, because that plot needs time you need for the dust to settle, for your audience to feel grounded with that sort of plot be emotionally connected to know how horrible the world has become how terribly people are killed, you need to give your audience time to get emotional about the characters death, then and only then the movie will stay with them, and what in the fucking bullshit was that song with disha patni and prabhas like it really didn't need a song, it's high time we realize movies don't have to have songs , let the music industry grow on it's own for God's sake let artists make songs they want to make rather than obliging them to make songs that forcefully cater to your movies plot IT LITERALLY DIDNT NEED A SONG, AND IT DIDNT NEED ROMANCE EITHER FOR GODS SAKE PLS PLS MAKE MOVIES WITHOUT ACTUALLY ROMANCE let people suffer in almost ships, let people suffer in if only they were lovers, let people suffer in omg they went through so much together they loved eachother but that's it nothing ever happens, BECAUSE I AM SOOOO SICK OF WATCHINV FORCED COUPLES PLACED INTO MOVIE OF GENRES WHICH ARENT ROMANCE

I've so much more to say but I'll do it some other time..... all this makes me feel like I should actually think about doing book reviews as a job mom said i should try but srsly it feels like if I'm getting paid they ain't gonna let me write what I want to and honestly I'm soooo much of a constructive criticism person , I criticise my own reviews and thoughts over a movie or show so many times before making up my mind on one opinion ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

Maybe I'll start writing reviews about all the movies and shows and animes and books that i watch or read.... God I've so much to say

Why do I've so many opinions on so many things