#the best thing is just sticking a straw in a coconut drinking the water and then eating the actual fruit inside

[fruixtii]

kalim is so right for loving coconut water coconut water is my best friend i love her

[studyingoose]

i’m always trying to find ways to lessen my impact on the environment but being a uni student means that most of the time i’m trying to find a balance between realistic long term actions and sustainability. so below, i’ve shared some of the ways i currently help lessen my environmental impact as well as some habits i’d like to slowly integrate into my life in the future.

bring your own water bottle - i think this one is pretty straight forward. i’m very lucky in the sense that my university provides a lot of refill stations. i usually pack my water the night before with my lunch so i don���t have to stress about it the next day. plus!! with my own water bottle, i can add lemon slices or mint etc. in winter, i like to use a thermos and bring honey lemon water, hot tea, or just not chilly water.

pack your own lunch - this not only helps you save money but also makes sure you know what you’re eating. i have a perfect sandwich sized container as well so it means i don’t have to use plastic wrap for anything. since i’m a vegetarian, most of my meals are pretty straightforward and feature rice, pasta, eggs etc. that i can buy in bulk with less plastic packaging as well.

bring your own utensils/keep cup - if you enjoy coffee, either sit in the cafe or bring your own reusable keep cup! my university is really conscious about this so all the nearby cafes let us bring our own cups and sometimes you even get discounts for not using single use cups. when i do go out to eat as well, i try to bring my own utensils so i don’t have to use the single use plastic (or even those wooden chopsticks) this also applies to straws for bubble tea or smoothies.

switch milks - i know a lot of people already have coconut, soy, almond milks with their coffee/tea due to lactose intolerance/other medical/personal reasons. many coffee shops do charge for plant milks but if they don’t then it’s an option since the dairy industry produces a lot of methane (also plant based milks are healthier). i don’t personally buy milk often because i don’t drink it so it’s not a big dent in my budgeting but if it is then don’t worry about it.

reuse notebooks  - on top of recycling my scrap paper, i reuse notebooks that i never finished. instead of organising my notebooks in terms of papers or courses, i separate them by area of study so it means that i can use the same notebook for 3/4 years for politics or english. otherwise, i use the backs of notebooks to write practice essays, do past papers, doodle, do random brain dumps etc. essentially i treat unused paper in notebooks like loose leaf.

buy pen refills and do pen audits - find out what pens you actually use!! i know for me, i’ve felt pressured by the studyblr “aesthetic” to buy stationary that i don’t have a use for and it just results in unnecessary consumerism. i use roughly 10 pens at most as well as some art supplies but for my pens, i try to use refills instead of replacing the entire pen. in the future, i’d like to also stop using correction tape and be comfortable enough to just cross things out. i have to use a wide range of pencils for art but in general use, i simply own 3 mechanical pencils and refill the lead instead.

carry a reusable shopping bag - recently, my country banned single use plastic bags so now everyone uses reusable shopping bags or no bags. although you can buy brown paper bags for 20 cents in supermarkets, you never know what you’ll need to carry around so i like to bring a tote bag.

invest in a quilt - i am super guilty of getting cold really easily and that means i usually have the heater/thermostat on in winter when i’m studying but recently i’ve come to realise that i abuse that a lot. so instead of automatically going to turn on the heater, i try to see if i’m wearing enough first or getting a quilt to put on my lap when i feel cold. this way i don’t have to rack a super high power bill in winter.

change your mailing options - previously i’d get mail from my bank regarding bank statements etc. now i’ve opted for monthly statements online instead saving the paper that they’d use mailing me, similarly i no longer sign up for coupon books, circulars, random magazines etc.

thrift shop your clothes - i feel like this is a really big trend in my city but i’m trying to only thirft shop my clothes now instead of buying new. the thrift shops that i have access to are really good quality and it’s basically a reseller where people who bring their clothes in get 50% of the sale. this does mean that clothes are pricier than big chains like h&m but it also means that you have to think about the purchase for longer + a lot of the finds are super unique and will most likely last longer.

mend your own clothes - in a similar sense to thrifting, don’t just throw out a shirt because it’s missing a button. a 20 minute youtube tutorial can make sure that shirt remains a staple item in your wardrobe. plus sewing leads to darning your socks, knitting, crochet, or even making your own clothes.

consider epilating/laser hair removal - i used to go through so many plastic razors during summer because i was someone who preferred no hair. i know there are many people who don’t mind their body hair and that’s great! for those of you who do however, considering an epilator (multi use) or even laser hair removal (permanent). both are more expensive however they both also use less plastic (compared to fornightly/monthly throwing away of razors)

bulk make your own snacks - i really want to make my own museli bars in the future since i eat them a lot. usually i try to limit my snacks to things like carrot/celery sticks, fruit, nuts, berries etc. but i try to not get individually packaged snacks (they can be more expensive as well since you’re paying for convenience). this is definitely something i can work on but i’d like to be able to bulk make my own granola, museli, dips etc. in the future.

replant your vegetables - this is a lot more achievable for me since the place i live is rural in land style. currently my family has a multitude of fruit trees, tea trees and we’ve recently gotten into reusing our vegetable scraps. for celery/cabbage/lettuce/etc. you can replant the root area. the same goes for spring onions (which are super easy to grow! and garlic cloves!) most vegetables are quite easy to grow with just a bit of googling. even if you don’t have a lot of space but would like to give this a shot, consider adding some herbs to your indoors plant collection.

visit farmers markets - unfortunately, this isn’t that big a thing where i live but i remember going to a few as a kid and the produce is much fresher, the atmosphere is lovely, and it’s a good way to source food and products. many stalls also sell premade items like jams, sauces, baked goods, soap etc. so if you find yourself busy then it may be a possible investment to buy from farmers markets.

some other habits: composting, public transport, bicycling, bamboo toothbrushes, natural home cleaners, raising your own animals, beeswax wraps, cloth napkins/handkerchiefs, buy in bulk, use rain water to water your plants, invest in a menstrual cup, choose wooden over plastic

disclaimer: you don’t necessarily need to buy anything to be more environment friendly!! some things on this list do suggest it but look at your life currently, if you don’t drink coffee or tea on the go then there’s no need for a keep cup etc. invest in products, don’t just buy them because they’ve been advertised.also, i’d like to iterate that whilst climate change is a very real and very scary threat,  personal use by the general population only results in a small part of it so please don’t feel like you’re letting anyone down if your personal situation or any part of your life prevents you from doing more than a few things to help the environment. as long as you’re not being dick to the environment and taking 4 hour showers, using 500 plastic straws a day then doing your best is enough. if you can’t do anything more in lessening your environmental footprint, then that’s okay. other people might be able to so even just spreading the news could help a lot.

if you have any other habits that you do not in this list then please tell me as well so we can all learn from each other !

happy learning everyone xx

[sentientencyclopedia]

Snapshots

I don’t usually post fics on here, but carpe diem and all that. This piece is for the @b99fandomevents Summer 2020 Fic Exchange. This drabble is based on requests by @sandylovesfandoms for the Peraltiago honeymoon after Holt left and waterslides/waterparks.

Jake got one whiff of the drink and wrinkled his nose. But Amy was looking at him eagerly, so he gave her a weak smile and brought the glass to his lips. For love he told himself, before chugging the orange mush.

“Bleeeurgh.” He turned around and spit it back into his cup. “That is disgusting.” He kept the glass under the table, knowing that it grossed Amy out whenever he regurgitated food. And if she actually liked this toxic sludge of a smoothie, well, he wasn’t going to deprive her of her bliss.

“It’s not that bad.” Amy looked perfectly happy as she sipped the orange drink. Jake had to admit it matched her sundress and the ribbon in her straw hat perfectly. “I think the papaya and cantaloupe perfectly balance each other out, and the coconut cream gives it a smooth texture.”

“It is disgusting.” He pulled out his phone. “But it matches your dress. Smile!”

“It’s delicious, and more importantly, it’s good for you.” Amy grinned and he snapped the pic. Oh yeah, this was definitely going into the honeymoon scrapbook. He had a sneaking suspicion Amy had planned the aesthetic, but whatever. “It’s full of antioxidants and important minerals.”

“No wonder it tastes so bad.” He grimaced.

“You can’t live on sugar and alcohol, Jake.” He took another picture as she rolled her eyes, fork dangling from her fingertips. It wasn’t scrapbook material, but it was cute.

“It’s our honeymoon. It’s supposed to be magical. We can do whatever we want.” He stole a mango slice from her plate and got up to walk back to the smoothie bar. “Two virgin pina coladas, please.”

“There’s pineapple juice at the buffet.” The bartender stared at him.

“I know. Don’t forget the little umbrellas, please and thank you!” He gave the man a beaming smile and leaned against the counter.

The man was apparently used to unreasonable requests from vacationing tourists, because he tossed a few pineapple chunks and a cup of coconut milk into the blender, set it to spin and wordlessly poured the mixture out into cocktail glasses. With little umbrellas. “Thank you!” Jake took the drinks back to their table triumphantly, pausing to grab a few of the brightly colored straws at the buffet table.

“This is also fruity and coconutty and best of all, it doesn’t taste like the mutagen that made the Ninja Turtles.” He set the drinks on the table and placed two straws in his mouth, long sides sticking out.

“Does this make me look more like a vampire or a walrus?” He asked, pointing.

“Gee, it depends. Which one has purple teeth, again?” She gave Jake a teasing smile and took a picture of him making funny faces at the camera.

“Say what you want, Ames, but this is going to make drink consumption a lot more effective.” He stuck the bottom of one straw in each glass and drank from both at the same time. “Ta-da!”

“That’s good. According to my itinerary, we have five more minutes for breakfast if we want to make it to the next event on time.”

“You’re so organized, babe.” Jake grinned at her as she showed him the binder. “How did you manage to get all these sheets laminated?”

“I convinced the people in the printing center to let me use their office laminator.” Amy’s expression mirrored his, though her smile was tinged with pride. “I figured they needed to have one on site for all the signs and menus and stuff, of course.”

“Of course. Hey, what’s this blue marker for?” He reached for the sticker only to have Amy swat his hand away.

“That’s a surprise.”

“Like a Holly Genero costume kind of surprise or an open ice cream bar kind of surprise?”

“It’s better than an ice cream bar.”

“Hate to break it to you, Ames, but there are few things better than an open ice cream bar. Especially the kind with unlimited toppings.” It turned out that when Captain Holt had extended their stay, he’d also tacked on a few perks as a sort of extended apology.

One of those perks had been access to an open ice cream bar, with unlimited toppings. Jake and Amy had spent a solid hour building and eating the Biggest Behemoth Sundae in The History of The World.

At least, that’s what they’d captioned it when they sent a picture of the monstrosity to their friends back home. It had been a towering mass seven different flavors, coated in liberal amounts of sprinkles and candy with a cookie base. It had been delicious.

Remembering that inspired Jake with new ideas. “Do you think they’ll give me ice cream for breakfast if I asked?”

“Well, they probably would, but we had ice cream last night. Don’t you want to see what I’ve got planned for today?”

“Depends. What have you got planned?”

“So, I rescheduled the sensual feeding workshop because both of us agreed that we wanted to re-do that without Holt watching.”

“I still don’t think I can make eye contact with him ever again after what happened with the avocado.”

“Oh, yeah.” They shared a moment of silence for Jake’s dignity. “But this is our chance to make new, better memories.”

“I’ll drink to that.” He took a long sip of the pineapple juice.

“Then we’ve got a couples’ ballroom class.”

“Fancy.”

“I thought it would be a nice throwback to that case we worked.”

“The one where you were in the shiny mermaid dress?”

“Precisely. In case we ever need to go undercover like that again, I thought it would be good if we actually knew how to dance. Plus,” She gave him an arch look. “I really want to see you in that waistcoat again.”

“The what-now?”

“You know, that vest-thing you wore over your button-down when you were dressed as Dewey? I watched a lot of historical documentaries as a kid and I was really into the whole men-in-fitted-waistcoats look.” She smirked. “You weren’t the only one who got an eyeful at that dance competition.”

“I’ll file that away for future consideration.” Jake whispered, imagination running wild.

“Then we have a lunch, then beach time, then just one thing before dinner.”

“The surprise, you mean.”

“Mhm. Now hurry up and finish eating. Don’t want to be late for our second impressions.”

“Ay-ay, Captain.”

They had a great time at each of the different workshops and events, but Jake couldn’t stop thinking about the blue marker. He was itching to know what it meant, what the surprise would be.

Jake Peralta was many things. Patient was rarely one of them.

So he was practically twitching with excitement by the time the blue-marker event rolled around. They were in swimsuits, so it had to be something to do with water. He hoped it wasn’t water-aerobics.

Amy grinned as she pulled Jake through the archway. “Surprise!”

“Oh. My. God.” Jake’s eyes lit up as he took in the glorious sight in front of him. “Is that a waterslide?” The pool area was practically empty, inhabited only by two lifeguards and a few straggling swimmers. But there, framed in the orange glow of the setting sun, was a very long, very twisty waterslide.

“Surprise!” Amy said again, throwing her arms out. “I made sure to pick the time where we would be mostly uninterrupted. All the families are probably at the live band sing-along thing, and all the adults without children are probably at the beach luau. Which is totally capitalist cultural appropriation, and not even geographically accurate, so I thought it would be fine if we skipped it.”

“Good idea. Where did you even find this?” Jake didn’t think he’d ever stop smiling.

“It was in the resort brochure, Jake.” Amy was rolling her eyes, but not in the tired, I’m-disappointed-by-your-immaturity way. She was rolling her eyes in the I’m-trying-to-be-cool-but-also-fishing-for-compliments way.

Jake was good at compliments. “God, I love that you read the resort brochures. That you plan itineraries with all sorts of weird fun stuff like sensual food arranging classes and cool fun stuff like waterslides. I really want to kiss you right now.”

Amy put her arms around him and they kissed. It was a quick, happy one. Both of them were so excited that it was mostly teeth. “Ooh. Can we do that couple-y thing where one of us sits on the other person’s lap and we go down together?” Jake asked.

“Yes!”

“Is it weird that I just wished Charles’ was here to take a picture of us on our way down?”

“Weirdly enough, I had the same thought.”

“We’re definitely too used to him being around.”

“Yeah.” They both went quiet for a second, thinking about it.

“Waterslide time!” Amy decided to break the silence. They held hands and very safely walked over to the ladder.

[silverfootstepswrites]

Butterfly [10]

summary It’s alright. 

Kushina jolted a little when she heard knocking on the door. She nearly dropped the bowl she had been washing into the sink. Looking down at her gloved hands, she sighed.

“Naruto? Minato-kun?” she called. Silence answered her. 

“NARUTO!” Kushina yelled.

There was a thud. Rattling the plates stacked inside the cabinet.

“Ma?” Naruto’s voice groaned down the stairs. 

“Go answer the door for me. I’m doing dishes,” Kushina ordered.

And Naruto continued to moan his protest as he lumbered to the door. A yawn ripped through him as he opened it up. And his jaw cracked as he saw Sakura standing there. 

Sakura smiled.

“Hey there, sleepyhead,” she greeted him.

Naruto scrambled to flatten his hair. He rubbed at his eyes before he offered her a sheepish grin. 

Sakura held up a cloth bag.

“Sarutobi-Jiisan dropped off some okra. It’s way too much, so give it to Kushina-san for me,” Sakura instructed. Naruto accepted it with both hands. And then he blinked at her backpack. 

“Are you going somewhere, Nee-chan?” asked Naruto. He yawned, mouth opening wide. 

“Yeah. Up to Sendai for some business,” Sakura replied, adjusting the straps of her bag. Naruto’s mouth hung open.

“EH? Are you taking the train up?” he asked. 

Even the speeding Shinkansen took nearly 10 hours to travel that far north. Sakura could tell that the thought of sitting for half a day was torture for the jittery teenager. He could barely stand to sit still in class. She shook her head.

“I’m taking the train to the Fukuoka Airport. I would die if I had to sit in a train for long,” she told him. Naruto frowned.

“Aw, man. There’s this crazy popular ramen place that opened up somewhere in Sendai. Can’t you take me with you?” he pleaded.

She reached out to muss his hair. 

“Sorry. Already bought my tickets. Maybe next time?” she replied. Naruto’s lower lip jutted out. Sakura couldn’t help but laugh a little at that pathetic expression. She rubbed his hair a little harder until he batted her hand away. 

“Anything you want? Besides ramen?” asked Sakura. 

Naruto’s eyes brightened a little at that. “Daifuku?” 

“You got it, kiddo,” she answered. And then she stuck her head into the house. 

“KUSHINA-SAN!” Sakura called. There was a pause.

“Oh, Sakura-chan! Come inside! Did you eat breakfast yet?” Kushina yelled back. And Naruto stuck one finger in his ear, wondering, as usual, why they insisted on doing this every time.

“I have a train to catch. I’m heading up to Sendai for the weekend. Do you want anything?” Sakura requested.

“Sake!” Kushina promptly said.

“Okay!” 

And then Sakura looked back at Naruto, who scowled, digging his finger into his ear. She smiled at him. 

“Ittekimasu,” she told him.

His frown melted. “...Itterasshai, Nee-chan.”

Haku tackled her when he found her at the airport that night. He wrapped his arms around her, smothering her as he practically dangled off her. Sakura laughed, spinning around with him. 

“Okay, okay. Hi. Hello,” she said, tapping him on the back. 

He released her, eyes glittering. He wore a mask over his mouth, elastic bands looping over his ears. There was a beanie crammed over his wet hair. He wore a faded black t-shirt over skinny jeans. His jade bracelet caught the light as he pulled his mask down. Teeth showing as he beamed. 

“Is it okay for you to be up this late? Don’t you have practice tomorrow morning?” she inquired. 

Haku flapped his hand at her. 

“Whatever. Coach can wait,” he snorted. Like the thought of Kisame was a mosquito he was trying to bat away. Sakura smacked his hand. She wagged her finger in his face, suddenly stern.

“You won’t win all gold with that attitude,” Sakura warned him. Haku rolled his eyes, groaning. Hands linking behind her neck, he sagged. 

“Ughhhh, you sound just like him,” he griped. But then he stood up straight. He raised the mask back over his mouth, casting a look around the terminal. 

“Did you eat yet?” he asked her. 

“You have to watch your weight. No,” Sakura snapped before he could even ask her. And then she thrust her backpack into his arms. Scowling, Haku put it on backwards, letting it rest against his chest and stomach. 

“Go home,” he growled.

“No,” Sakura replied.

He stuck his tongue out at her. 

Sakura slept on his sofa that night. She woke when she heard his alarm go off. 

Despite his complaints, Haku was never late for training. That didn’t stop him from grumbling like an old man as he got out of bed and shuffled around in his slippers. 

She lay on her side, blanket wrapped around her shoulders. Each time the floorboards creaked, her eyes fluttered open. She glimpsed him brushing his teeth as he filled his water bottle. Pulling his shirt over his head, nearly tripping over his backpack. Sakura saw the round, purple marks on his back from cupping therapy. Haku paused in the doorway of his bedroom as he tied his hair back. The little ponytail jutted out at the top of his neck, like a bamboo shoot. He turned to her.

“I left a spare key for you on the counter,” he told her. 

Sakura closed her eyes.

“Thanks,” she replied.

“Help yourself to whatever’s in the fridge. But don’t drink my coconut water,” Haku went on.

“I don’t-”

“-like coconut water, yeah, yeah,” Haku finished for her as he remembered. They smiled at each other.

“Wanna join me later?” he offered, “I’ve got ballet in the afternoon, but I’ll be at the rink most of the day otherwise.” 

Sakura rolled over onto her other side, pulling the blanket over her head. And Haku laughed again. 

“Alright, I’ll shut up. Drop by if you can,” he then said. Sakura listened as his keys jangled together. The door clicked shut behind his footsteps. 

Sakura went right back to sleep. Snuggled up at the perfect temperature on the sofa. She didn’t wake again until after the sun had risen. She helped herself to  the coffee he had left warming. Crunched through an apple as she scrolled through the news on her phone. 

She put on a hat and sunglasses before she headed out of the apartment. Hands in the pockets of her joggers as she walked down the stairs. She hiked them up to her calves as she waited for the train. Bobbed her head to the music pouring in through her earbuds. 

Sendai was a bustling city, even this early in the morning. Businessmen and women rushed back and forth in their black and blue suits. Briefcases swinging around and coffee splashing in their hands. High school students strolled at a more leisurely pace, the girls linking arms and the boys knocking into each other. 

When Sakura stepped into the white building, the bell attached to the door jingled. The receptionist looked up, already smiling. And then her smile widened.

“Right on time. Go ahead, Haruno-san,” she directed, gesturing down the hall. Sakura waved at her before she went on. 

Physical therapy took about an hour and a half. The doctor’s eyebrows went up as she examined Sakura’s left knee. 

“Everything looks good. But I’d take it a little easy with all the jumps, Haruno-san. Or at least make sure you’re doing those stretches I taught you,” she instructed as she lowered Sakura’s foot. Sakura sat up, nodding. 

The doctor shook her head as she shed her gloves. Dropped them into the trash can.

“No big injuries. You might have had a few more years in you, you know,” she said, sounding a little wistful.

Sakura’s smile was tight. It hurt her cheeks. She shook the doctor’s hand, holding back all the things she could have said in return.

Against her best judgment, Sakura decided to head to the rink. She bought coffee. She tried her best not to slosh them around in the cardboard tray as she walked. And while the sign said that the rink was closed, she headed in anyway. Sneaking past the man sitting at the counter. With his eyes glued to his phone, he missed her completely. 

Sakura stepped into the cold room. She raised her sunglasses, let them sit on top of her hat as she glanced around. It didn’t take her long to find Haku and Kisame. And it wasn’t just Kisame’s blue hair. 

It was the yelling.

“That’s why! If I push it to the end, it’ll get the 10% bonus,” Haku snapped.

“You already have three quads in the program. You’ll be too tired,” Kisame snarled in return.

“I’m not a washed-up geezer like you. I can do it, old man!”

“You shitty little brat! Would you listen for once in your life?”

“Then how the hell am I supposed to get gold this year!”

“Maybe if you cleaned up your landings, you might stand a chance.”

“I told you! It’s all mental. I’ve got this without you nagging me!”

“Tell that to your straight silver streak last season! Not a single gold!”

Sakura leaned over the side of the rink. She reached out, touching the only iced coffee to the back of Haku’s neck. He yelped, whirling around to face her. Teeth bared. But then his face went blank when Sakura grinned around the straw at him. She slurped down a mouthful of coffee before she spoke.

“Coach is right. Adding more jumps isn’t going to help you if you can’t stick the landings,” she pointed out. 

Kisame made a smug noise in the back of his throat as he folded his arms across his chest. When Sakura handed him a paper cup of hot coffee, he stepped off the ice to accept it. Haku followed him, still scowling. 

Kisame opened the lid to stare down at the black coffee. He grunted his approval before he looked back at her.

“What’re you doing up here? Aren’t you supposed to be harvesting turnips or something?” Kisame asked. 

Sakura, in the middle of handing Haku the other coffee, made a face. 

“You know, just because it’s out in the countryside doesn’t mean there are only farmers living there,” she sighed. Kisame eyed her over the rim of the cup as he took a sip. He lowered it.

“Yeah. You got the farmers’ wives and their kids too,” he retorted. 

Sakura rolled her eyes. She turned her attention back to Haku. She fixed his bangs as he blew on his coffee to cool it.

“Anyway, you should probably listen to Coach on this one, kiddo,” Sakura advised. He wrinkled his nose at her. Stuck his tongue out before he blew out a long sigh.

“....Fine,” he grumbled.

After they had finished their coffee, Haku headed back onto the ice. Not before shoving his empty cup into Kisame’s hands. He skated off to the opposite side, smirking. Kisame glowered.

“That little shit,” he grumbled. 

He then looked Sakura over.

“What’re you doing here anyway?” asked Kisame.

His hair was going silver at the temples. His voice had grown a little rougher. He looked different from when he had first started coaching her. He had a bit of a belly now. Smiling, Sakura reached out to pat it. He glared at her. But she saw him suck his gut in. Just a bit.

“Had a last check-up on this old thang,” she then said, pointing at her left knee. 

Kisame’s expression softened. 

“Everything’s okay?” he questioned.

During her last World Championships, she fell during one of the practice sessions. And while she was no stranger to falling, she had landed hard on her left knee. The pain hadn’t gone away like it normally did. She had managed to keep the swelling under control by wrapping it and icing it. She had kept it a secret from Kisame and somehow managed to skate both her programs to win her fifth consecutive gold. 

She had only told Kisame of her injury on the plane home. And of course he had nagged her without cease the entire ride. Haku falling asleep against her shoulder on her other side. Her knee throbbing steadily like a metronome. 

After surgery and four months of physical therapy, she was back on the ice. She knew Kisame had been biting his nails during the Olympics. Anxious that her kneecap would somehow fly off in the middle of one of her routines. He had cried harder than she had when she had won gold. Tears running freely down his cheeks when they read out her scores. And Haku had tackled the both of them from behind, arms almost choking her as he hugged her. 

Sakura smiled, flashing Kisame a thumbs up. 

“It’s perfect, just like me,” she assured him.

Kisame grimaced. He reached out and gave her shoulder a light shove. And they both smiled a little. 

Over Kisame’s shoulder, she saw Haku whiz past. His left toe pick dug into the ice. She counted his rotations as he spun through the air. When he landed on his right foot, flecks of ice sprayed out in every direction. She flung her coffee into the trash can before she slammed both her hands down on the edge of the rink. Kisame read the fury in her eyes and turned to look at Haku.

“You under-rotated!” she accused. 

Haku pivoted on his right skate. Put a hand on his hip.

“It wasn’t that bad,” Haku replied. 

“You look like you’re making kakigori! Let me just get you some mochi and syrup!” Sakura criticized, jabbing her finger in his direction. Haku skated up to the edge of the rink, grabbing it too. 

“You and the old man nag too much! It’s practice! I’ll get it right next time!” he snarled. 

“I take my free time to teach you and you still can’t get the toe loop right! That’s the easiest one!” Sakura went on. 

“You can’t even do a quad yourself! What’re you bragging about?” Haku shot right back.

“I have shorter legs than you! Of course I can’t! No wonder Coach is getting fat! He’s probably drinking himself to sleep at night because all he has is stupid students like you left!” retorted Sakura, pointing at Kisame. Who simply sighed, sipping at his coffee before it went cold. 

As they continued to bicker, Sakura grabbed the front of Haku’s shirt. He grabbed her by the face, squeezing her cheeks together to make her lips bulge out. They eventually exploded into laughter, but not before Sakura dealt in a few good pinches. Wheezing, they leaned against the sides of the rink and looked at Kisame. Who simply eyed them.

“...I forgot how exhausting it is with you two in the same rink,” was all he stated. His voice low and measured. 

Sakura winked. 

“I think you mean ‘amazing’. Because I’m amazing,” she corrected her. Laughing again when Haku groaned.

Sakura stayed for the rest of Haku’s morning practice session. She let Kisame do most of the scolding, content to just watch Haku dance in circles and spirals. And when they began packing up to go get lunch, Sakura turned down their invitation. 

Haku’s eyes went wide. “We can go get dessert, too,” he tried to bribe her. But then caught the dirty look Kisame shot him. “I mean, you can get dessert,” Haku amended. 

“Gotta head back. I’ve got work tomorrow,” she told them. 

Haku sulked as he watched Kisame muss Sakura’s hair. 

“Next time, come during a break. I’ll buy you that drink,” Kisame told her. Sakura nodded. When she turned to Haku, arms outstretched, he glared. Crossing his arms across his chest, he made a face at her. 

“Come on, you brat,” Sakura insisted. 

Only then did Haku slowly make his way over to give her a hug. 

“Don’t look so sad. Win all gold and you’ll see me soon,” she promised him. And then she gave him a hard push to the chest, sending him gliding backwards into the rink. Sticking her tongue out when he gave her an exasperated smile.

The plane ride back down to Fukuoka was short. She managed to get through a few chapters of her latest audiobook before it touched down on the ground. And as she stood at the train station, she took her phone off airplane mode. When the screen lit up, she saw several notifications. Texts and private messages began pouring in. Notifications from both Instagram and Twitter also popped up.

Sakura tapped the icon to open up Instagram. She received a notification that Samui had tagged her in something. She pressed it.

It was a looping video of her standing outside the rink, yelling at Haku, gesturing with her hands. Kisame also barked something beside her, arms crossed. And although Haku’s back was to the camera, Sakura knew that he had been yelling something back at them as he skated up to them. It had been taken from too far away to hear what any of them was yelling. And Samui’s giggles drowned out what little might have been discernible.  

The caption underneath read: We got a special visitor in Sendai today. Looks like @haku.skates is getting a lot of attention. Next time, come say hi to me too, @ sakura-haru. 

Sakura hadn’t even looked at the other skaters on the opposite end of the rink. It made sense that Samui would be training there too. It was her home rink after all. She felt bad for not greeting her for all of one second. Until she scrolled down and saw all the comments:

OMG IS THAT HARUNO SAKURA? Queen!

Wow is she making a comeback? (ʘᗩʘ’)

Where’s she been????? I MISSED HER SO MUCH COME BACK.

Is it just me or does she look like she got THICC 

Is she going to be Shimizu Haku’s coach from now on????!?! sdkfsjdkfs I can’t

Taking a deep breath, she opened up Twitter. Where a skating news page had just retweeted the video and then speculated that she would be coaching Haku this upcoming season. Other accounts presented theories that grew more and more ridiculous as time went on. One speculated that she had retired because she was secretly pregnant. She rolled her eyes at that. 

Sakura went to her settings and turned off all notifications for her social media apps. As she did this, she received several texts from Haku. At first, all she received were dozens of siren emojis. And then he began sending actual words.

OMG.

omg no.

Are you going to kill her?

Do you want me to tell her to take it down?

Sakura sighed as she typed back: No point. If anyone asks, you don’t know who I am. I really don’t want the media all up in my face right now.

There was a pause. And then Haku replied, Got it.

Sakura dropped her phone into her pocket. Where it promptly began vibrating. She read the name flashing across the screen. Saw the photo of the man with dark hair covering his left eye. 

Sakura hesitated. And then she dragged her finger across the bottom of the screen.

“Hi, Senpai,” she finally replied. And she heard him chuckle.

“Hey there, Sakura-san. Uh... guess you’re in Sendai, huh?” he said. She had always liked that about Utakata. He at least didn’t lie about obvious things. Of course he would have spotted the video. It was his job to stay up-to-date on these kinds of things.

Sakura let out a deep breath. 

“Yeah, I was for a little bit. Not anymore,” she replied.

There was a long pause. She could hear a keyboard clattering away in the background. A phone ringing. He was at work.

“…This is weird, right?” Utakata asked.

“It is,” she agreed. She couldn’t help but laugh, too.

“I kept telling myself I would check up on you after everything that happened. And then I looked at my calendar today and I was like ‘crap, she’s going to be mad at me’.”

Sakura pressed her lips together. Smile fading.

“I’m not mad,” she assured him. But it came out quieter than she had intended. So she said it again.

“I’m not mad.”

She rolled her weight onto the balls of her feet. And then back, onto her heels. Rocking back and forth as she craned her neck. Looking for the train. 

“I’m sorry about that, by the way. I really did mean to keep in touch,” Utakata told her. 

And then Sakura hesitated one more time. Before she asked: “...How’s he doing?”

“We haven’t talked much since he moved to St. Petersburg. But he seems pretty down. Well.... not that he shouldn’t be,” Utakata fumbled with his words. Sakura smiled, even though she knew he wouldn’t see it. She slipped her free hand into her pocket.

“I’m fine, Utakata-senpai. Don’t worry about me so much,” she told him. 

“...You sure?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

They exchanged a few more words. He made her promise to make time for him next time she was this close to Tokyo before he hung up. 

Soon after, the train arrived. As Sakura settled into her seat by the window, she found herself scrolling through Instagram again. Not on Samui’s post. Eventually people would lose interest. It would blow over quickly.

Instead, she found herself looking through her old photos. Perusing down the list, back years and years ago. Until she was wading through memories from three years ago. 

Her thumb froze as she examined one of the posts. She was almost certain it was during the NHK Trophy, during one of the practice sessions. Maybe Karin had been the one to take it, since it was obviously a candid. Or maybe it was Haku. 

She was wearing a white jacket with a Japanese flag sewn over her heart. Both her arms were up in the air, mouth wide open mid-laugh. And Kimimaro lay on the ice a little ways from her. Slumped over on his side. Laughing in that way he did when it was only the two of them. Silver hair spilling down his neck, eyes squinting shut. 

She didn’t remember what had made the both of them laugh so hard. It was probably nothing. But it was everything, too.  

She considered deleting the photo. Finger hovering over the screen. Sighing, she set her phone down. She wondered if he remembered what had been so funny at the time. He probably did. 

He always held onto things longer than she did.

End Part 2

[l1lithh]

Beauty on a Budget

As a University student and baby lawyer (aka legal clerk) I know what it's like to not have a big budget, but still want to look your best. Personally, here are little tricks and tools I've discovered through the years.

Start with your whole body. More fruit, lean proteins, and veggies, less processed food. It is honestly the best thing for your skin, energy levels, and your body overall. On top of that, throw some walks in and drink your water--both of which are free. Start with a good foundation, and you will spend less on beauty products to begin with. In addition, you will save time and money at the doctor's office, too.

Cetaphil and baby shampoo are the most underappreciated products ever. Seriously! Baby shampoo is gentle and will not dry out your hair, leaving it with that straw-like feel, but leave it soft and shiny. Same for cetaphil, but with your skin; your skin does a pretty good job of cleaning itself. It just needs a gentle cleanser (aside from cystic acne or other serious medical problems, ofc. Talk to your doctor.) To get the job done. Cetaphil moisturizer comes in a giant bulk bottle and one half pump will do the trick. It's a great value.

Coconut oil. In my experience, this stuff is all purpose and comes in a bulk tub for around 10 bucks. You can use it on the ends of your hair to fix breakage and split ends, which is how I use it, or my boyfriend has used it to soften up bumpy, dry, damaged patches on his arms. In addition, it's a great anti-fungal, so if you have a problem with dandruff or build up, coconut oil has your back. Just heat it up, apply to dry or wet hair, leave it in for as long as you can, and wash your hair. Or heat between your fingers and apply to the ends of your hair while it's drying to fix breakage. We've even used it as lube (do not use with latex condoms).

Drug Store Make-up. I don't care what YouTube gurus say, some of this s*** is good s***. Maybelline's FitMe powder and foundation is seriously amazing and finishes as smooth as prestige products. If you have sensitive skin or allergies, try physicians formula, or stick with prestige. Maybelline Falsies mascara (the one in the pink bottle) is amazing, too. Cherubs will kiss your eyelashes. For lipsticks, Revlon is pretty solid, and has like, millions of colours. If you wanna be extra fancy and get falsies, you can buy a pack of 5 or 6 pretty cheap at the grocery store, too. For makeup removal, stick with a hot washcloth and elbow grease, then cleanse. No need to waste money on wipes that are really harsh on your skin. Like I said, your skin can take care of itself p well.

Those 99 cent lil hair mask packets are p nifty tbh. Especially anything with argan oil or coconut oil 👌👌

Annnddd that's all I can think of atm, but there are of course tons more tips out there.

***edit: a lovely soul reminded me that baby oil is a great tool for removing makeup such as stubborn mattes if elbow grease isn't doing the trick. @adulting-isnt-easy****

[cyb-by-lang]

OSF AU - All the Little Children (1/?) points

Fū and certain other characters don’t get a whole lot of spotlight in OSF proper, so here’s an AU of an AU and at this point I almost feel like referencing Inception.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Part 1: In which a fairy saves a small child, bugs have families, and everyone is lost. (Takes place ten years prior to the start of One Piece.)

Fū sighed. “Chōmei? Chōmei, you can stop laughing any time now.”

“You’re upside-down in a tree, Fū! This is about the unluckiest I’ve ever seen you,” Chōmei squeaked in response, his voice much higher than it had ever been in Fū’s life. He sounded like a child, not a mighty Tailed Beast. He didn’t sound like the beetle she’d spent her whole life befriending.

Then again, Fū thought as she reached up to undo the vines tangled around her legs, he’s never been this small before. “Well, you’re not wrong. I guess it’s a change for both of us.”

Chōmei made a sad little humming noise, angling his head upward toward her as she dropped from the canopy. Her best friend had either shrunk or gotten way younger, because he didn’t even have his signature orange wings or blue armor anymore. Instead, he was a red-eyed beetle larva the length of her forearm and about four times as wide. While he had tiny nubs for legs, and seven longer ones to represent the spots where his wings and tail would someday grow in, Chōmei was almost helpless now.

Fū knelt next to him, and he climbed into her lap. He didn’t feel slimy, just cool and a bit squishy. Fū ran her hands over his head, then let him grip her fingers in his mandibles. “I don’t know where we are, Chōmei. None of the trees look the same.”

“They look almost the same from my viewpoint.” Chōmei clambered up her arm and onto her back, to where her empty scroll-holster sat strapped to her back. “It’s lucky you have this, Fū. You can carry me without hands.”

“I’m just worried you’re gonna be stuck like this, Chōmei,” Fū replied, helping her beleaguered companion into his new carrier. “Don’t you wanna just fly?”

“I do, but maybe you should check if you still can? That would be a lucky break, wouldn’t it?” Chōmei sounded cheerful, his tinny voice accented by the thumps of his tail-stubs against his fabric seat.

Fū grinned at her friend’s attitude, then put her hands together. “Let’s try it, then!”

While Chōmei was small, his chakra flowed through her body the same as it always did. Orange wings, identical to the ones that Chōmei should’ve had, sprouted from her back just below the edge of her shirt. She flapped her rings rapidly, making them go almost invisible to the naked eye through sheer speed, and then hopped experimentally.

In no time at all, she was flying as though Chōmei hadn’t lost size and mobility.

“This is so different from when I’m flying!” Chōmei said, sticking his head out of the carrier as they flew through the lower sections of the trees. “You know, once I get back to normal, we should try this again. It’s nice relying on you instead.”

“I’m glad you think so,” Fū said, as they skittered through the air a few more times to get their bearings, “but help me look out for trees!”

Really, it wasn’t all that different from flying with any old weight on her back. Fū already knew how to compensate for training devices, her bedroll, and a million other things. Chōmei being alive and occasionally moving was a little weird, but he was so happy about the situation that Fū didn’t feel the slightest bit discouraged. He was her little pep-talk in a bag.

Practicing, though, was necessary. Fū remembered how tough it’d been to learn how to fly in the first place, and she needed to be careful in case Chōmei wasn’t as tough as he used to be.

“ Fū, I have a suggestion,” Chōmei said, after they’d been flying level for a few minutes. “Can we go that way? I feel like it’s a lucky direction.”

“North?” Fū asked, coming to stop on a high tree branch. “What makes north so lucky?”

“I think I can feel other Tailed Beasts over there! Meeting with two of my siblings would be really lucky.” Chōmei wriggled his tails. “I haven’t seen them in a really long time.”

Fū paused for a second. She’d never met Chōmei’s family, but she had heard that they were stuck with other hosts. Would the other jinchūriki be friendly or not? Regardless of the answer, she owed it to Chōmei to make sure he could see his family again. She didn’t really know what else to do.

“Okay, we can do that.” Fū flitted into the air again. “Oh, can you tell me stories about them as we go?”

“Of course, Fū!”

Fū and Chōmei didn’t go nearly at their highest speeds, because the warm forest was way too dense. Flying too fast would lead straight into a crash, and Fū didn’t need to have another one of those under her belt. That flying slowly meant Chōmei’s voice could soothe her during the trip was a great benefit, too. His voice was different now, but he could talk for hours and hours without needing to breathe or to drink water for a break. Even with the noise in the jungle, it helped to have one consistent, friendly face along for the ride.

“Aaaaaaah! Somebody help meeeee!”

Fū jerked to a stop in midair, wings buzzing anxiously. “Someone’s in trouble.”

“Go,” said Chōmei, and Fū flew in the direction of the screams.

Fū zipped through the warm forest air, weaving around and over trees and underbrush as she made her way toward the sounds of both screams and wolves howling in the afternoon light.

She hit the ground and rolled when she reached the edge of a ravine, then dove down toward the screams without hesitation, feet-first.

She landed on a wolf the size of a cow, shoving its whole head straight into the dirt below under the weight of her flapping wings and her chakra-charged stomp. Its jaw slammed shut mere centimeters from a screaming kid half Fu’s size, sending bits of teeth and blood everywhere. Before jumping off to face the rest of the pack, Fū gave it one more stomp for good measure.

“Six on one’s not a fair fight, you jerks!” Fū shouted, as the wolves near the back of the pack started to reconsider their choices. “Let’s make it three!”

“A fairy?!” screeched the kid behind her.

Not the best reaction to a heroic entrance Fū had ever heard, but she’d take it. Dropping into a taijutsu pose, even with Chōmei on her back and her wings still buzzing, Fū said, “Chōmei, ready?”

Chōmei spat a glob of silk directly at the face of a wolf coming up behind Fū, hitting it perfectly. “You know it! Let’s show them it’s not their lucky day!”

“D-don’t forget about me!” said the kid with the straw hat, and the three of them fought the wolves together.

Sure, most of the fight came down to Fū’s punishing kicks and her wings battering the wolves when her legs didn’t, but the kid did what he could even if wild flailing punches was the extent of it. Chōmei kept both eyes on him, for the sake of making sure their rescue went all the way through. And shot more silk at the wolves.

In the end, Fū left a pile of broken wolf bodies lying all over the rocks. Some of them had silk on them, of course, but she didn’t have time for getting rid of that kind of inconsequential evidence. All she did was blow on her knuckles to make sure they hadn’t split, then went to check on the little rescue-ee.

Fū ’s new friend was actually a little older than she had thought. While was tiny and round-faced and skinny-limbed, he had a curved scar under one eye and a set to his jaw that she didn’t usually see in the younger village kids. At least, not before their parents pulled them away from her. Sure, the straw hat he wore was way too big for him, and he was covered in scrapes and debris, but he wasn’t panicky or crying (that much).

Fū liked him instantly. Without hesitation, she crouched down to his eye level and held out a hand. “Hi! Are you all right?”

“I-I’m fine!” The kid put on a brave face. Though his lower lip wobbled for a second or two, he took a deep breath and grabbed her hands in his. With his eyes and nose running like faucets, he stammered, “Y-you were really cool!”

“I was, wasn’t I?” Fū said, smiling at the compliment. “Thank you!”

“What about me?” Chōmei wanted to know, sneaking out from his carrier. “Am I cool?”

“Uwaa!” The kid looked like he was over the moon, despite his injuries. “Your bug talks? Bug, you’re the coolest thing ever!”

“His name is Chōmei, and I’m Fū.” She said in a fake-serious voice, “Chōmei and me were gonna meet up with his brothers, and then we heard you! So before we go, Chōmei wants to know if you’re okay. For real.”

“I’m fine, really!” the kid insisted, more confidently this time. With one hand on his hat, he said firmly, “I’m—I’m gonna be the Pirate King someday, so this is nothing!”

“What’s the name of the future Pirate King, then?” Chōmei asked.

“Monkey D. Luffy,” said the kid. A thought struck him. “Hey, can you join my crew?”

“You got a ship?” Fū countered playfully.

“Uh… Not yet,” Luffy admitted, a little shamefaced. Then he puffed himself right back up and added, “But I will someday! Once I do, then you can join and we can have adventures, Fairy! And Coconut, are you going to join too?”

“After you’re a little bigger,” Chōmei promised. “But first, I need to see my brothers and tell them what is happening.”

“That makes—wait, bugs have brothers?” Luffy blinked, his eyes huge as he thought it through. He covered his mouth with both hands. “Bugs have brothers waiting for them?”

“This bug does,” Chōmei said, his tails waving in the air. “I’m a rhinoceros beetle! Just small.”

Mostly, anyway.

“So cool!” Luffy squealed, in awe.

“Hey, Luffy? Can I see your arms?” Fū asked, drawing the boy’s attention back to her. She folded her wings back so they barely brushed the ground, keeping them out of the way. “You look like you’ve had a tough day.”

Luffy fidgeted before he complied, then said, “Only a little bit.” He was a lousy liar, pursing his lips and refusing to meet her eyes. He even innocently whistled a note or two. “I definitely haven’t been out here for three days!”

Fū’s eyebrows rose. Three days in a jungle like this was no small thing, especially for a boy this young. With his arms all scratched up like this, though, she believed him. Though there was something weird about his skin and his arms. Neither one really felt normal, not like Shibuki or any of Fū’s old teammates.

Still, Luffy appeared to either not want her to worry, or be trying to preserve his pride. She let his arms go and said, “Why are you out here all alone, though?”

“I’m not alone, not really!” Luffy insisted. “Uh, I definitely wasn’t following Ace around. And I’m not lost!”

“Well,” Fū began slowly, choosing her words with care, “even if you’re not lost, I am.”

“Eh?! But you have wings! Can’t you just…?” Luffy flapped his arms, totally confused.

“It’s not that easy,” Fū said, eying his movements. Did… Did his elbow just bend…? “Ah!”

“Hm?” Luffy stopped flapping, his arms coming to a halt at his sides. Even so, his limbs bounced like rubber, not like normal arms! Not even like Fu’s.

“How are you doing that, Luffy?” Fū asked, taking his hand. Before she realized it, she stretched his hand a lot farther away from the rest of him than made any sense. “Whoa…”

“I ate the Gomu Gomu no Mi!” Luffy explained cheerfully, hooking his other hand around his mouth and pulling. His face stretched like it was made of— “I’m a rubber man!”

“This is so cool,” Fū breathed, her eyes shining. “This is the coolest thing I’ve ever seen!”

“How far can you stretch?” Chōmei asked, crawling out onto Fu’s shoulder.

“I can stretch really far!” Luffy let his cheek snap back to its normal dimensions, then grinned widely. “And my punch is like a pistol!”

“What’s a pistol?” Fū asked.

“It’s, uh, it’s a gun!” Luffy said. Clearly, this was supposed to make sense.

But it didn’t. “What’s a ‘gun’?”

Luffy made a face, then frowned as he thought. It was quite a frown, with his face pulled into an awful exaggerated grimace. Then, “Um, Dadan has one? I can show you!”

“Okay,” Fū replied, since she could still make it to Chōmei’s brothers before sundown. This was okay.

Luffy held out his hand until she took it and started to tug Fū along, then froze mid-step before his arm could stretch out when she didn’t immediately follow. Twisting his head all the way around without moving the rest of his body, he screeched, “I’m not lost!” He fidgeted in place again, hopping from foot to foot. “I, uh. I just don’t know how to get back to the bandits…”

Fū got fully to her feet, sending her wings buzzing rapidly. She put her free hand to her chin in an exaggerated thinking pose, then said, “Hey, Luffy? Maybe we should fly around until we find it! You can ride with Chōmei, and he can tell you all about how I do it.”

“Really?!” Luffy squeaked, looking up at her with an even more awestruck expression. “Can—can we go really fast? Really, really fast?!”

“You got it!” Fū said, giving him a thumbs-up.

“Yay!”

“Just be sure to hang on tight,” Chōmei warned him.

With that, Luffy bounced over to give Fū the biggest hug he could. His whole body wasn’t that much bigger than Fū’s torso, so when he wrapped his legs and arms around her a couple of times to be secure, her wings still had plenty of room to maneuver. Chōmei was forced to move up toward her shoulder blades, but he and Luffy could still talk to each other.

They ended up flying together for about twenty minutes, though Luffy didn’t know how to find “the bandits.” While Fū hoped silently that he only meant his family and was calling them a funny name, she flew around the forest until she could hear the sounds of shouting in the distance. Unlike when she met Luffy, the voices were nearly all deep enough to belong to adults instead of lost kids, and most of them were just rowdy. If Luffy wanted to head toward all that noise, though, Fū wouldn’t tell him she couldn’t take him there. After all, she could fly.

Fū twisted her wings around so they could hover, just at the edge of where the forest turned into a little clearing. Amid the short grass and on a little hill, there was a building that looked a bit like a village longhouse. There were three sections, and the door had a pair of crossed swords on top like a pair of beetle horns.

Luffy unwound himself from Fū’s stomach with a snap, turning back into just a little kid with a straw hat and not a walking rubber band. He stumbled a little bit, but dashed toward the hut without a backwards glance. “Hey, I’m back!”

Fū rocketed up into the trees, leaping instead of flying so she didn’t make any noise.

“Luffy came back alive!”

“He’s still alive?!”

“Where the hell were you?!”

“Where have you been?”

Luffy responded to all of this with a loud, “I was running from wolves and got chased off a cliff and a fairy and a bug saved me!”

Fū saw Luffy turn in the doorway, then look around in confusion.

“Eh?! She disappeared!” A pause. “Oh, right! She’s gotta find Coconut’s brothers and go back to the fairy kingdom.”

“…Did you hit your head on something?”

“Nope! I bounce.”

“Sorry, Luffy, but a heroine must be mysterious and cool!” Fū whispered, so only Chōmei could hear her. Crossing her arms dramatically, she added at the same volume, “I’ll see you again someday, but for now I have a mission for Chōmei. Until then, goodbye!”

[shannrussell-blog1]

There’s regular camping gear that we take on every camping trip… tent, table, stove, sleeping gear, etc. Then there’s a whole host of extraordinarily peculiar gear that can arguably enhance your camping experience.

Some of these things are pretty nifty. Others will lure you with bizarre advertising that you’ll find hard to look away from only to leave you feeling unsettled and questioning what on earth it was you just watched!

Not surprisingly, a lot of these items are no longer available, but there are always new weird and wonderful bits of gear hitting the market all the time.

So without further ado, here are the 5 outlandish and offbeat bits of camping gear that we’ve found so far on the web.

5. The Bumper Dumper

You’d want to make sure you are on a quiet road when you stop to use the Bumper Dumper. This portable toilet seat and bucket fits into your tow hitch so you can sit down at the back of your car for a roadside dump. Maybe not as private as an old fallen log (pardon the pun) but far more comfortable.

I’m not sure where you put the bucket once you’ve filled it, the roof rack is probably the best option. Just make sure your buddy is finished before you drive away, and beware of the hot exhaust.

Image by Bumper Dumper

4. A whole host of weird sleeping bags

Kids worried about sleeping in the outdoors? Help them get to sleep in the dark by handing them a giant shark and telling them to climb right on into its mouth! Kids scared of sharks? That’s ok because there’s a grizzly bear option too!

Imagine how excited medical students would be with the anatomical sleeping bag, and nothing says “don’t worry, we’re all in this together” more than a fellow camper in a cadaver bag.

Image by World of Camping

3. Leatherman Tread Multi Tools

Can we call this a man bangle? The Leatherman Tread is more of a fashion statement than a multi-tool. It’s one of those bits of gear that you buy someone who already has everything plus it’s the only multi-tool we know of that is allowed through airport security.

That being said, you’d be best checking with your airline before an airport security officer decides your wrist bling would look better on them.

Image by Leatherman

. Field Candy Patterned Tents

These guys are taking personalised camping to the next level. Traditional ‘A-frame’ tents that let you blend in or stand out as much as you want, some designs may even make your fellow campers feel somewhat uneasy. From sheep to an English pub, watermelons, books and even Iron Maiden, there’s a design to suit every personality.

Image by Field Candy

1. Victorinox Swiss Champ XAVT

Victorinox is really just showing off here. 8 functions in an inconveniently large 65mm wide package, this Swiss Army pocket knife is better suited to the display cabinet than your camping kit… Victorinox does mention this though.

Image by Unbox Therapy

0. Offroad Segway

If hiking isn’t your thing then why not tear up the walking tracks and mow down the wildlife with an off-road segway. These will set you back a pretty penny but at least you won’t be burning all those hard-earned calories on the way to your destination. Oh, and you’re going to need a powered site.

Image by Al Gadgets Technology

19. Super Kimbos – keep your pants on, even when you go to the toilet!

I don’t have any words for this.

18. Nite Ops Stubby Cooler… with LED light

You probably wouldn’t buy one of these for yourself, but you wouldn’t complain if this was in your Kris Kringle gift. Made with ABS plastic (think Lego) and equipped with an LED light, you’ve now got an excuse for taking your bevvie for a long post-campfire-curry-dinner long-drop sitting.

Image by Maxim

17. Inflatable Lounge Chairs

Initially, I thought these were ridiculous. Then thoughts of relaxing around the campsite on a 4 seater inflatable lounge chair entered my mind and before I knew it I was reaching for the credit card. These would look more at home in your lounge room than in the campsite, and with one, two and four-seater options you can seat the whole family and some wildlife.

Just for the record, I got over my excitement pretty quickly and didn’t actually buy one of these lounge chairs, however, an inflatable lounge could also be fun for floating down a creek in after some rainy weather, don’t you think?

Image by Archi Expo

16. ManCan Portable Beer Keg

How necessary these are for camping could be debated for a lifetime, but the one thing that any beer loving camper would agree on is that these are pretty cool. A single wall keg that you can keep in your portable car fridge ready for a cold beer on tap in the campsite. You can also get a limited edition WoManCan, which a portion of the proceeds will go to supporting women in the brewing industry.

Their claims of being lightweight are a stretch for hikers but a homebrew enthusiast on a car based camping trip would love this.

Image by InsideHook

15. TrailKeg

Once again, a little heavy for hiking but…this portable beer keg is vacuum insulated and will keep your beer cold for up to 4 hours. So, theoretically, if you were to do away with 5kg of other gear in your rucksack, you could take cold beer on tap just about anywhere. You’d consider it… right?

Image by TrailKeg

14. Powdered Beer

If you really can’t justify the weight of a ManCan or TrailKeg in your trekking pack, then maybe powdered beer is more your thing. As a beer lover myself I’d rather drink muddy water filtered through my socks than a glass of powdered beer, but I’ve never tried it, so who am I to judge? The fact that it doesn’t seem to be available any more may be a good indication of flavour though.

Image by Trek’n Eat

13. The DryFlush Toilet

Are you concerned about the environmental impact of using water, chemicals and dedicated dump points for your portable toilet waste? Not to worry, now you can vacuum wrap your crap in foil and bank it all in a giant plastic bag! Then you get to pay a visit to every landfill site on your trip to get rid of it all! Seems like an environmentally friendly solution to me…not!

1. Fry an egg with the Flash Torch

Keep out of reach of children! This torch won’t just light your path to the dunny, it will also start a fire and fry an egg, all with the power of its ‘laser beam’ [insert Dr Evil voiceover]. Sounds more like a lightsabre to me and a sure fire way to burn holes in your tent, administer third-degree burns to wildlife and fry the retinas of your camping buddies. It’s 100% legally guaranteed under US law though, so it must be safe!

Image by Gizmodo

11. GSI Ultralight Table

We actually sell this one at Snowys. Our initial thoughts were that it is gimmicky and expensive and wouldn’t be overly popular… we were wrong! It seems that this 30cm long table is sought after, most likely by gourmet trail chefs. All in all, it’s a pretty cool bit of kit, just very expensive for a small amount of benchtop.

Image by GSI Outdoors

10. BBQ Fishing Rod

Snow Peak makes a whole host of gimmicky yet surprisingly functional gear for the outdoors lifestyle and the BBQ Rod is by no means an exception. Attach your marshmallows, sausages, fish or veggies to the hook and dangle them over the fire, then with a small flick of the wrist your food flips for even cooking. Pretty cool!

Image by Snow Peak

9. Titanium Straw

The Snow Peak Titanium straw is the strongest and most durable reusable straw in the world. Able to pierce coconuts with a single blow and rest stylishly in any cocktail. Doubles as a miniature blow dart pipe for lightweight hunting adventures.

This is quite a timely placement given the talk of the environmental impact disposable straws are having, unfortunately, it’s not available in Australia as yet.

Image by Snow Peak

8. Candwich – Canned Sandwiches

If I had to pull some positives from this, it would be their marketing. However, apart from fleeting glimpses of these sandwiches flying out of their respective cans and across the dance floor into the mouths of hungry disco dancers, there’s no image of the actual product. Most likely because they have the plate appeal of a budget airline meal. I’m not sure why you would take a canned sandwich to a dance club but given they stay ‘fresh’ for over a year they are probably handy for camping… I think I’ll stick to baked beans myself though.

Alternatively, there are canned cheeseburgers from the same people that brought you the powdered beer. Strangely enough, these don’t seem to be available any more.

Video by Candwich

7. GSI Collapsible Whisk

Without any context, it’s hard to work out what this peculiar little device is and a poll of random guesses to its use may return some less than desirable guesses given its whip-like appearance. But, when GSI designed it they had a portable whisk in mind.

If scrambled eggs, omelettes and pancakes are a regular on your camping menu then this may be a useful item in your kit.

Image by Snowys Outdoors

6. iGuaneye Footwear

The concept makes sense, inspired by the Amazonian Indians who dipped their feet in natural latex for protection. While the latex stuck to the Amazonians feet like glue, these shoes rely on your big toe and some rubber around the heel to keep the shoe in place.

Personally, I’ve never seen a problem with flip-flops, but these do look interesting. iGuaneye looks like a relatively new brand, not something we’ve seen on any shelves in Australia just yet.

Image by iGUANEYE

5. Hydro Hammock Bath Tub

If you’ve packed everything, including the kitchen sink, and still got a 4× foot void in your boot, you can take the bathtub too thanks to the Hydro Hammock. This battery powered gas heated insulated hammock is designed to be filled with water to create a remote hydro spa. Simply hang it between two rock solid and level anchor points, or dig an enormous hole to lay it in. Then add about 180 litres of water and make sure you’ve got a flood management plan in place when you empty it.

The Hydro Hammock can be used in the wilderness, the beach or wherever you can feasibly carry a 30 kg case and 180 kg of water. The images even suggest you use it as an outdoor bath on your suburban balcony!

Image by Daily Mail Australia

4. Campfire Defender Blanket

I’m not sure I could sleep at night knowing my campfire is smouldering away under a massive blanket not too far from my tent. There are a small number of online reviews supporting my concerns, inversely then there’s a lot of positive feedback.

The idea is that instead of extinguishing your fire when you hit the hay, just peg this woven glass fire blanket over your fire. This allows the fire to keep burning whilst containing embers which means you’ll have hot coals in the morning.

Personally, I feel like it takes the responsibility out of making sure your fire is adequately extinguished. It also seems like it would be a dirty smoky item to be hauling around in your vehicle.

Video by Campfire Defender

3. Glow in the Dark Toilet Paper

Other than being able to locate the toilet paper in bush dunny completely void of light, or maybe so you can see the roll that you just dropped in the long drop, I’m pretty confident in saying that the 

Image by ThisIsWhyImBroke

. GSI Vortex Blender

This blender does not require electricity, so you don’t have to go without your protein shake, daiquiris and margaritas at the campsite. What you will need though, is a strong arm, a camp table strong enough to clamp the blender onto, and a couple of camping buddies to hold everything steady as you thrash away at the crank handle in an effort to turn the contents of the blender into a liquid.

The best thing is that you get an upper body workout while you produce the vitamin enriched shake you’ll need for muscle recovery afterwards.

Image by GSI Outdoors

1. Squat Strap

There’s a lot that is not right here. Firstly, it looks to be a terribly uncomfortable & over engineered strap that supposedly makes bush toileting easy… provided you have quads of steel. Secondly, the marketing is akin to a B-Grade comedic horror movie.

In summary, a short-tempered man in a white suit (Tuxman) steps out from behind a tree wearing a monkey mask and stares creepily at an unsuspecting camper preparing for a in the woods. Following a sales pitch on the Squat Strap and its numerous other uses, Tuxman pulls out a graphic illustration of a naked man strapped to a tree with bricks falling from his, err… rear-end!

Assumingly once the bricks have passed, the unsuspecting camper is converted to Tuxman’s bush monkey ways and dons the white suit before honing in on another culprit who appears to be converted as he’s come prepared with a Squat Strap of his own. They then all join hands (Tuxman now in a robe!) in a show of united appreciation for the Squat Strap!

These don’t look to be available any more, maybe the budget for the commercial could have been spent better on other areas of marketing?

Video by Squat Monkey

Got any strange camping products that we should add to our list? Post us some details below and we’ll include it!

The post Weird, Wonderful & Disturbingly Strange Camping Gear appeared first on Snowys Blog.

[lux-sugar-noir]

My Diet

A lot of people were asking me about my diet and how I got to a size 0. If you want to follow it too, here are the rules I’ve set up for myself:

Congrats! You’re a vegan now (mostly). Here’s why:

- No milk. Unsweetened Almond milk has no sugar and is only 30kcal for 8oz. Nonfat milk has 12g sugar and 90kcal per 8oz. Also, I can’t drink milk because I’m slightly lactose intolerant.

- No cream or half & half. Half & half has 20kcal and 2g fat per TABLESPOON.

- No eggs. One large egg has around 78kcal and 5g of fat. You can have egg whites (2) once a week if necessary but only if they are hard boiled or poached but I don’t eat them at all.

- No butter. While butter has slightly fewer calories and 2g less fat than olive oil, olive oil has been shown to have heart health benefits. Olive oil only contains 2g saturated fat while butter has 7g. If you are on an incredibly low calorie diet, it is essential to maintain a diet that benefits the health of your heart.

- No yogurt, with exceptions. Unsweetened coconut milk yogurt has no sugar, 110kcal per 8oz, and 7g fat. If you want the real deal, your best bet is Siggi’s skyr, there’s no fat but there are more kcal and way more sugars per serving and the serving is smaller.

- No cheese. It’s so bad for you. So good but so bad for you. I have the hardest time with this one. I usually eat a small amount of cheese once every two weeks or else I’ll binge and eat a whole wheel lmao.

- No white sugar. Most white sugar is not vegan and is filtered through charred animal bones. Which is super gross to me. Maple syrup or raw honey, while still being high in sugars, have health benefits not found in white sugar. Maple syrup is full of anti-oxidants and honey has been proven to aid the good bacteria in the stomach that assist in the digestion of food.

- NO MEAT. Consuming meat regularly has contributed to the heart disease epidemic in the U.S. Your heart health should be a factor in what you eat when eating a low calorie diet. You can have fish once a week but it has to be sashimi, not sushi, or nigiri, or maki, or tataki. Just sashimi.

Things unrelated to veganism (or the bullshit, fish-eating version of it that I follow):

- You drink your coffee black now. End of story. If that’s an issue you can add unsweetened almond milk only to it. Lattes, cappuccinos, and cafe au laits are out. I’m a barista and when I cut out lattes and fancy drinks and syrups from my diet I dropped 5 pounds in about a week. You will get used to the taste, try getting flavoured iced coffees that are brewed, not syrups.

- No soda (not even diet or 0kcal versions), premade iced teas or lemonades, energy drinks, juice (yeah, no juice), sports drinks, vitamin water, smoothies (unless made at home). You drink water and black coffee now. Iced tea is fine when unsweetened. Seltzer is a great alternative to sodas and isn’t packed with the chemicals diet sodas have.

- No fried food. None whatsoever. Be careful with this one though because there are a lot of things that are fried that you wouldn’t think are. There’s a burger place down the street from me that has the best bean burger I’ve ever had and I used to get one as a treat once a month but I found out that they deep fry the whole bean patty and that’s why it’s so good! Now I don’t eat them anymore :c

- No ketchup or mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is fat fat fat and not vegan. Ketchup is full of sugar (and gross). Mustard is fine.

- No more “instant” foods. Anything that comes out of a packet and is ready in ten minutes or less is not good for you. No frozen dinners, instant ramen, etc. It’s all fat and calories.

- All vegetables should be roasted with less than .5oz of olive oil per serving or steamed. Get a bamboo steamer, it will change your life.

- Pasta, bread, crackers, wraps/tortillas are a treat. Try to keep it around once a week. That doesn’t mean you can eat each one of those once a week either. If you eat pasta then no more bread or crackers or tortillas for the rest of the week.

- Alcohol. You can drink, moderately. No beer, kahlua, bailey’s, malibu etc., or fruity mixed drinks. And watch out for drinks you thinks are healthier. I used to drink gin and tonic all the time because I thought tonic water was the same as seltzer then I learned that tonic water has 124kcal per serving and 32 GRAMS OF SUGAR. Just get your drinks made with seltzer water or club soda and extra lime or lemon. Also, this should be a once or twice a month treat and remember you’re on a restrictive diet. One drink may feel like two or three so be smart and eat a little food first and drink water especially if you’re in an unfamiliar place or with people you don’t know.

- No desserts, ever. Or sweets of any kind really. I buy honey sticks and eat one whenever I think I’m going to binge on sweets.

- Meal replacement drinks and protein shakes are an ABSOLUTE NO. I dated a guy who got really into lifting (lmao, he was a tool) when we were dating and those drinks were developed to help you bulk up. Guys who lift drink them during their “gain” phases because they’re high in calories, fat, and sugar. They are the opposite of what you want in your diet.

Also, every day I take biotin (for my hair, skin, and nails), a vitamin B complex (for metabolism), and slow release iron supplements (every couple of days to once a week). I walk or bike to work everyday (literally. I work so fucking much), I do light yoga most days, and I don’t smoke. If I really fuck up, I usually purge but I’m trying not to do that anymore because I like having teeth (I went to the dentist yesterday and she said I have “beautiful teeth” and I almost cried because I was so scared they were going to tell me something was wrong with them).

I drink about 4 liters (~1 gallon) of water a day. Get a water bottle with a straw it will help you so much. I don’t count calories as much as I count fat and sugar but I eat probably around 500kcal. I eat mostly fresh fruit, steamed vegetables, and curries I make at home. I’ll probably post recipes in the future (I used to be a cook so I promise they aren’t your usual gross “10 calorie chickpea sorbet with with 80 splenda”).

I think that’s pretty much everything. Feel free to ask me questions about anything!

[peaceplaypassion-blog]

Zanzibar: a beach lover’s DREAM!!

i left a little piece of my heart in Rwanda and on an impulse came to Zanzibar, Tanzania, in search of white sand beaches, turquoise bathtub-warm water, and some more peace.

immediate thoughts in the taxi from the airpirt: Rwanda is way prettier. no offence Tanzania. it’s hard to beat those lush, green rolling hills with cute little villages with cute pastel-coloured shops, and i was getting a lot of dusty clay and garbage in their place. in Rwanda all locals are required to do community service on the last Saturday of the month including maintenance and cleaning the streets. you will be hard pressed to find any litter in Rwanda. also Tanzania is a Muslim country so the ladies (and even young girls like they literally just learned to walk) are covered up in headscarves instead of the vibrant Rwandan patterns called kitenge with fruit baskets on their heads. different vibes.

anywho. the beaches are INCREDIBLE. here’s a lil summary:

- British fam adopts me for Tanzanian visa gongshow at Dar es Salaam airport

- arrive in Nungwi, the northern tip of Zanzibar - Kipepeo hostel owner Shadrock is amazing, Rastafarian, always smiling and saying “pretty cool”. but toilet is a hole in the ground, door is made of straw and held together with a bike lock, and ground is sand/ants so switched to Akii Garden hotel (probably a bit of a budge leap but at least my door locks :D)

- dinner at Highland with German friends Lea and Max. $3 ugali - you dip your whole fingers in the beef sauce, as demonstrated to me by Vicky. not my type of finger food.

- snorkelling tour to Mnemba Island - omg everyone needs to come to Zanzibar for this alone!!! BEST snorkelling i have ever done - tons of colourful fish, crystal clear water, white sand and gorg coral reef. i am about to post this from Thailand and these beaches are meh in comparison!! on the Mnemba tour, lunch was included on a private island aka paradise. saw dolphins twice on the ride over!! i came with Lea and Max and made friends with Pippa and Josep from Lisbon and Barcelona, and Becky and friends from Dubai. travelling alone ain’t so bad :) had a lol on the ride home where all 6 workers were snoozin on the boat

- met a fam from Dar es Salaam at dinner, met up with Dubai friends for drinks at Z Rooftop

- beach day with Lea and Max and Vicky comes through with a free kayak and paddleboard sesh. bless her.

- African dance party at GuruGuru for Vicky’s friends’ goodbye party. girls are on their shins humping the ground. guys are running around with their hands waving in the air. there is an impromptu dance performance by some young dancer dudes (i died). Lea and i think a huge brawl is going to break out but then they hug and laugh. so expressive. so energetic. that night was CRAZY.

- Stone Town, UNESCO heritage site - winding alleyways, slave market, many mainy tourist shops with the exact same goods for sale: “Zanzibar” tanks, sarongs, African art and household items like spoons and bowls. the stuff is actually pretty cool but not cool enough to backpack it around for the next 5 months. took a boat to Prison Island and saw 192 year old turtle and his friends

- beach day with Max and Lea, they go swimming with turtles and get bitten while feeding them. i do not regret opting out. drank some coconuts at sunset.

the one standout thing i’ll picture from Zanzibar (aside from freakishly perfect beaches) is, amongst ALL the locals working out on the beach at sunset, the Maasai people walking the beach with their sticks and chanting/jumping. the Maasai tribe is nomadic, moving through Tanzania and i think Kenya with their goats and cows. it was kind of eerie to me. i kept thinking mom wouldn’t like this lol. these people on the beach are just tourist attractions - the authentic Maasai have stretched earlobes and scars on their cheeks. also a bit sad but Zanzy is so tourist tainted. you cant build authentic connections when everyone is trying to scam you.

the best thing by far is the beaches!!! i dont know what will beat them. if you’re looking for perfection on a beach. Zanzy is calling your name!!

[health-jobs]

5 Self Care Tips to Save Your Healthcare Career and Your Sanity

You work hard.

Day and night, evenings and weekends, holidays and celebrations. You work, giving your time and energy to take care of everybody else.

But who takes care of you? Who takes care of the healthcare provider?

You’re tired and you feel yourself burning out. There is so little of you left to give, and yet you know that your patients are relying on you to take care of them.

Your co-workers are stressed and overworked, and at home there are little and grown people depending on you to care for them also.

But you are strong. You keep on giving and caring, even when you are so exhausted your eyelids hurt. Your feet feel like they have been stepped on by a herd of elephants.

You need to be cared for; you desperately look for a break — a way to recharge.

Who is going to take care of you?

Here’s the honest truth: It will be you.

You will need to choose to care for yourself. Do it for you, to save your sanity and keep your heart soft enough to care.

If you can’t do it for you, do it for your career. A “bummed-out” health professional will not be able to care for others.

Caring for yourself is not brain surgery – it’s really simple!  It is choosing today to do one thing to fill your own tank.

Try these tips and see what happens.

The Secret Tip to Staying on Your Feet

Food, food, food! Tips on self-care always talk about food.

No surprise when you consider that the fuel you provide your body will directly impact your performance. If you eat garbage, you will feel like garbage.

You know this already; you tell your patients, I’m sure.

Eat more fruits and vegetables

Avoid sugary, processed foods

Cut back on caffeine

Avoid Sugar and Caffeine

When you eat something with sugar in it, you will feel crankier, make bad decisions, and be sluggish and unable to remember important details. Sugar makes you dumb.

Once you have cut back on your sugar intake, aim to reduce your daily caffeine. I know you work nights! I know you need a coffee to stay functional and coherent.

You’ll feel better (and sleep better!) if you at least reduce your caffeine.

Try these steps:

Add more fresh fruit and greens to your diet by bringing a green smoothie with you to work. Sip on your veggies instead of your morning, afternoon, or midnight sugar and caffeine boost

Get a fancy-dancy thermo cup with a solid straw and fill it up with one of these awesome energy boosting green smoothies:

Nobody will know what you are drinking but you. And you will (in a week or two – it takes time for your body to adjust to less sugar and caffeine) feel awesome.

Bonus tip: No more dreaded coffee breath. Your patients and co-workers will thank you. Silently, most likely.

Increase fats and proteins

Fat

Did I just say add more fat to your life? Sure thing I did!

Healthy fats such as coconut oil can:

Give you longer and more sustained energy than carbs

Act as an anti-inflammatory (Hello? Sore back, anybody?)

Function as an antibiotic and ward off illness (You work with sick people; you need all the help you can get!)

Improve your memory and cognitive function

Instead of a cup of coffee, add a tablespoon of coconut oil to a mug of hot milk with cocoa. Blend it up and it is a frothy hot chocolate that will give you sustained energy without the dreaded crash.

Protein

Eating more protein in your day will help you to stay full longer. Who has time for a decent lunch break? Protein will keep your blood sugars stable and prevent you from getting that angry, hungry feeling.

Protein also helps you to resist that box of donuts, bagels, and cupcakes sitting in the break room. You don’t’ need those bad boys. They won’t treat you well.

Instead try to:

Eat up to 30 grams of protein within 30 minutes of waking up.

Scramble 2-3 eggs with a side of spinach, zucchini, bacon, or sausage.

Bring a small container to work with (allergy friendly!) nuts like walnuts, pecans, almonds or seeds like sunflower and pumpkin to nibble on throughout the day.

Eat a dish of hummus with veggie sticks at lunch to keep you going.

Throw a scoop of high quality protein powder in your green smoothie. You wont’ believe the energy this will give your body.

Eating extra protein in a day can also help you lose weight. But it can make you thirsty. Which leads to….

Drink Water

I know, I know. Healthcare providers don’t pee. You have often skipped bathroom breaks for 12+ hours. But I hope you eventually go home, yes?

So when you are on your way home, fill up a giant bottle with water and start chugging. Your body is made up of 60% water, and you have run, sweated, and talked most of that moisture out of your body. It’s time to replenish.

A tall glass of ice water with a squirt of lemon or lime is refreshing and surprisingly rejuvenating. Try it when you first get home.

I know you can’t be running to the bathroom all shift, so be smart. Drink more water when you are off duty.

The Key to Not Burning Out

Did you know that the health care profession is considered to be the 5th most stressful job in North America?

That’s your daily life. No wonder you are feeling stressed.

I’ll give you 3 quick tips that won’t take much time to help you to defuse that stress. I know you don’t have hours of free time for mani-pedis and weekend getaways!

Meditate

Give yourself 5 minutes. You know you have 5 minutes each day. That’s how long it’s taking you to read this article or check the latest scoop on Game of Thrones.

Lock yourself in the bathroom on your coveted lunch break. Sit in your car before heading into your house. Get off the bus one stop early and walk home. Put some relaxing music in your headphones and block out the noise.

Breathe.

List the things you are thankful for, even if they are small. Gratitude resets our minds and reduces anxiety.

Journal

I don’t mean writing long, emotional diary entries like in junior high. Just a quick 5 minutes of jotting down:

What you did

What you felt

Your goals

What you are thankful for

A simple daily journal entry in a notebook or on your phone can:

Clear your emotions

Increase your creativity

Help you figure out your future

Sleep better

Improve your relationships

Just quickly writing down the highlights of your day can remind you of why you are doing what you are doing. You are a helper. Making a note on how you helped somebody today will give you courage to help someone tomorrow.

Take a Break

Please do, dear hardworking Caregiver. You need to give yourself a break.

I know it is hard.

So many people depend on you, but somewhere in your day or your week, give yourself permission to relax.

You do get days off…sometimes.

Spend some time in nature. Turn off your phone for 24 hours and take a break from the Internet and news that constantly hits you with the harsh realities of the world.

You know life can be horrible. You see it everyday. But it’s not all ugly.

There is beauty and you need, more than anybody, to keep on seeing the beauty that is still present.

Give yourself a chance to relax and see beauty in nature, in your children, in your spouse, in art, in music.

Beauty is nature’s antidote for burn out. I prescribe a regular dose.

Hospitals are chock full with emotionally charged situations. No matter what department you work in, tempers can flare and things get ugly with patients, co-workers, and supervisors. Working in healthcare exposes you to messy situations.

An Effective Strategy for When Tempers Flare and Bedpans Fly

Here are 7 strategies to keep yourself safe when people are getting angry and in your face.

Take a step back. Literally. Putting an extra foot of space between you a person who is upset prevents the person from feeling crowded and reduces their anxiety. (Also, they can’t hit you as easily. Sad reality.)

Keep eye contact, but not in an aggressive way. Try looking directly in their eyes for 5-6 seconds at a time before breaking eye contact briefly. This relays honesty and compassion. When you look at a person, try to SEE him or her as hurting and upset. Picture your sweet 2-year-old and feel empathy.

Relax your facial expression, unpurse your lips, return your eyebrows to a resting position (not raised or scowling). If you look angry, they will just get angrier!

Remain calm. You are the logical, reasonable one right now. You are in control of the situation. Lower the tone of your voice. Don’t get shrill! Speak slower. Use the person’s first name – this helps them to feel like a person.

Ask gentle questions and practice empathetic listening. Helpful phrases include: “Can you tell me what happened?” “I can understand why that is upsetting” or “That sounds really tough.”

Don’t argue. It won’t help anything! Apologize if you are in the wrong and a patient’s meds are late. Reassure the patient that you will take care of the situation as best you can.

Let it go! Just like Elsa from Frozen, it is hard to be the focus of anger. After you leave the unpleasant situation, take a deep breath. Blow it out. Pat yourself on the back for handling it well. Recognize that you probably feel tight and upset from those emotions. That’s okay. You are safe now, and the situation is finished.

The Surprising Way to Make Work Feel like a Party

Yeah, yeah! Who doesn’t like a little fun?

Forbes magazine reports that adding fun to your workplace reduces sick calls, increases your productivity, and cuts back on stress.

So cut loose!

But remember you are still a professional, so cut loose appropriately.

Remember that there is no place for jokes and humor that demean and insult other people. Humor at another’s expense will not have any positive effect.

Zero. Don’t go there.

But a smile, a harmless joke, and a shared laugh will make those around you happier. Those who spread joy often receive joy.

Aim to do one kind and unnecessary act for a co-worker or patient everyday. Write a little note to a co-worker thanking her for something she did. Celebrate with a patient for his progress.

Take some time to laugh, to see the funny side of things. Health care professionals are famous for being able to handle morbid situations with humor.

If you are too busy to bring joy to another person, you are missing the mark. Take some time today to spontaneously – or plan to – help another person and bring him a smile. This will make your workday fun!

The Best Way to Know Where You End

You are only one person. Taking care of you will mean knowing your limits. That’s your responsibility. Nobody will respect your boundaries if you have none.

Say no to the things that don’t really matter, so you can say yes to the things that do. It’s okay to say “No” to covering a shift for a co-worker who wants to go to a concert. Later you can say “yes” to being there for an ill family member.

You need to define both for yourself, your patients, and your co-workers what are your duties and responsibilities. When you are going above and beyond your responsibilities, you feel emotionally and physically exhausted. And you might feel used.

Then you end up not being able to give anymore.

Don’t go there.

Healthy boundaries protect you and will prolong your career.

You can say no and still be a nice person. You can say no and still take care of your patients. Try to:

Say no respectfully: “I know you want to chat, but I can’t right now.”

Say no and give a reason: “I can’t take your shift; I am already committed to another event that weekend.”

Say no with a rain check: “I can’t go out for drinks tonight, but I would love to go down to the cafeteria with you right now.”

Taking on others’ concerns and life issues will burn you out. It is so tempting because you are a CAREGIVER! Bah!

But being a caregiver does not mean you are a superhero. Even Superman has to say no.

Sometimes caring for somebody means letting them figure it out on their own.

Conclusion

What do you think? Are your healthcare career and your sanity worth saving?

You have so much to give to those who need you. We need you. The world needs people like you who care.

Can I just stop and say, “Thank you”?

Thank you for caring. Thank you for being the person who holds hands and cleans up bodily fluids. Thank you for dealing with all the crap, literally and figuratively.

But don’t forget you.

You matter.

It doesn’t have to be hard and it doesn’t take much time to add a few simple self-care strategies to your day.

Will you do it? Cut back on the sugar, take some time to meditate, have fun, set boundaries.

Just do one thing for you today. What will it be?

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