#the beard........... oh my god...........

[sb-essebi]

Hi @owwllly I loved this comic so much I wrote fic about it!

(Some angst slipped in, sorry about that)

Me and my ✨genius partner✨

Jayvik | Teen and Up | 1k | Complete

No Archive Warnings Apply | Tags: #Fluff #a dash of angst #Getting Together #Friends to Lovers #First Kiss #Pent-up Feelings #Insecurity #Self-Worth Issues #internalized ableism #(Viktor thinks something very ugly about himself) #Author is disabled #Implied Sexual Content

[Read on AO3]

OR

“Incredible,” Viktor said, awed, staring at the newly-refined, perfectly round gem.

“It worked. We finally turned the crystals into gemstones!”

The excitement in Jayce’s voice was palpable. Even if the experiment hadn’t been as successful as this, that alone would have been enough to make Viktor happy. Jayce’s shoulder was amazingly warm against the back of Viktor’s.

“See,” he said gently, extricating himself from Jayce and taking off his goggles. “Your theory was solid, it was just the execution that needed some refinement.”

“Amazing…” Jayce’s eyes were exhaustion-soft and joy-bright, and Viktor had to force himself to look away. “And we pulled it off a week ahead of Progress Day!” Viktor put his goggles down on the workbench, and felt the air behind him shift as Jayce rose and bolted for the door. “Sit tight! I’ll bring Heimerdinger over and show him our new invention.”

Turning to watch Jayce go, Viktor spotted the thick, scruffy stubble that had taken over Jayce’s face in the days and nights spent working ceaselessly in the lab.

It looked quite fetching on Jayce, and Viktor felt some heat rush to his cheeks at the thought.

“Eh, Jayce, wait!”

Jayce stopped at the door and looked back, smiling.

“Yes, V?”

Viktor pointedly tapped a finger against his own cheek to signal Jayce to check his.

Jayce’s eyes and mouth went wide.

“Oh! Almost forgot.”

Puzzled, Viktor watched Jayce walk back over to him.

Then, Jayce planted a firm, resounding kiss on his cheek.

“I’ll go tell the professor what me and my genius partner have created!”

With a wave and a wink, he left.

As if nothing had happened. As if Viktor’s cheek weren’t burning still from the touch of his lips. As if he hadn’t left Viktor speechless with his whole face growing hotter and hotter by the second. As if Viktor’s right hand weren’t glued to the spot Jayce had kissed as though to keep that easy affection trapped against his skin.

“I… I meant your beard,” Viktor said to the empty room.

Next thing he knew, Viktor had bent over the workbench, face buried into one of his forearms while the other clutched at the back of his hair, shaking, with a blush searing itself down his neck and chest.

Normally, he could handle his feelings for Jayce. He could handle Jayce’s unfairly good looks and his utterly perfect body. He could even handle Jayce’s tactile nature, the hands on his arms, the shoulder touches and the half-hugs.

But this… this casual intimacy, however accidental, this he couldn’t handle. Not on three hours of sleep in as many days. Not when it ushered in thoughts of what if. What if it could be intentional, what if he were Jayce’s life partner, what if he could have Jayce-

He curled in on himself until it hurt, and a horrendous, needy whine left his throat.

“Viktor, I am so sor- Viktor, are you okay? Oh God, you’re breathing so fast-”

It was humiliating, to be caught wanting so viscerally. Especially to be caught wanting as someone like him, defective and deteriorating and dying, wanting someone like Jayce, who was— everything. Who was perfect. Who deserved better and more and longer, who Viktor had vowed to leave alone, to spare him an even worse heartbreak when Viktor would inevitably pass—

Viktor thought he might start crying.

And that was when Jayce decided to put both hands on his shoulders.

“Viktor, are you okay? Please, talk to me. Do you need medical attention? I’m so sorry about- that was so out of line-“

Later, Viktor would not know what came over him. He would blame the lack of sleep, temporary insanity, arcane influence, anything but the fact that he just couldn’t take it anymore. Couldn’t take the gentleness and concern in Jayce’s voice. And his every resolve crumbled to dust.

He straightened up, swivelling on the stool when Jayce recoiled in surprise, punted his good leg on the floor to stop himself once they were face to face, grabbed Jayce by the tie and kissed him squarely on the lips.

Jayce stood stock-still. For some reason, presumedly out of shock, he let Viktor kiss him long and lingering and desperate, and catalogue the heat of his body and the taste of his lips and the feel of his beard against the corner of Viktor’s mouth while the rest of the world faded from Viktor’s awareness until—

Until Jayce kissed him back.

Cupped Viktor’s face in his large, warm, calloused hands, melted into him and kissed. Him. Back.

Viktor’s breath was promptly punched out of his lungs. He kissed Jayce breathlessly then, needing him far more than air, pressing his tongue past Jayce’s parted lips and kissing him until black spots were dancing behind Viktor’s eyelids and he had to forcibly pull himself back with a gasp.

Jayce was breathing hard, cheeks and ears crimson.

“I was gonna say I was sorry for kissing your cheek,” he said with a chuckle, one hand rubbing the back of his own neck. “But, um-”

Viktor took a great gulp of air and kissed him silent.

Surely, when he ran out of oxygen again he would know what to say. Something that wasn’t ‘I love you’. Surely, after this kiss.

Or after the one that followed.

Or the one after.

Surely he could face Jayce then, question him as to why he was even indulging Viktor.

Certainly, after they’d finished putting the lab’s workbench through new and unspeakable abuses, Viktor would be able to field Jayce’s inevitable inquiry of his behaviour, respond with something that wasn’t that he adored Jayce and wanted to spend every second of his however short life with him.

Surely.

Definitely.

Doubtlessly.

Doubtlessly, there was an explanation for Jayce lying on the floor and gathering Viktor into his arms and on top of him to spare him the cold hard stone, holding Viktor tight and frantic and gentle, alternating between peppering his face and neck with kisses and whispering sweet nothings into his ear -my partner, my beautiful perfect partner, my Viktor- that didn’t include mutual, requited, wholehearted romantic love for one another.

Wasn’t there?

sleepless nights

[zephyrrhiesfyrian]

Look up bluebellowl for post pla Ingo versus Emmet muscular structure/anatomy. It shows the difference between Ingo's body and Emmet's.

It's not an exact match to how your post pla submas are but it does a good job of showing how Ingo physically changed to survive in Hisui.

With your submas I believe Emmet has some muscle and fat while Ingo has more lean muscle but is also malnourished so not a lot of fat. Emmet is a twig and Ingo is a twunk (between twink and hunk).

TWUNK INGO ALSKJDJDK

I have also recently been absorbing more of people's headcanons around the twins being related to Gym Leader Drayden and that only makes their builds even funnier

because Drayden is built like a goddamn brick wall XD

imagine Ingo comes back from Hisui and Drayden is so proud that he's finally put on some muscle

[cxrsed-angel]

Overtime

pairing: Joel Miller x F!reader

rating: 18+

w.c: 2k

summary: You stay late after work with Joel at his construction office. (I suck at summaries, Joel and reader hookup in Joel's office after everyone leaves).

warning: No outbreak AU, Smut, P in V sex (unprotected), fingering, oral (male receiving), dbf ish!Joel, mention of age difference (Joel is like 40+, reader is 20+). Established relationship

a/n: first fic of 2025 🥳this is just porn with no plot that's been in my drafts sorry not sorry. Posting this in hopes it helps me get over my fear of posting fics on here and my forming hatred of this app. this was proof read by only me so sorry if they're mistakes. happy new year :)

You've been at the front desk all day organizing Joel’s clients for the projects and renovation, replying to emails, answering phones, doing your best to answer the questions you can, or forwarding the calls to Joel so he can explain what you can’t. 

 You’ve been his assistant at his construction office since you started college. Joel is a close friend of your dad’s and he had convinced Joel to hire you until you go back to college in the fall to help him organize and with his schedule. You answer the phone, reply to his emails, get his lunch, and do everyday assistant things. Instead, you found yourself bent over at his office desk as fucked you. Almost every day, after everyone had gone home for the day. 

Once you see everyone else has left and it was just you and Joel. You go to Joel’s office and knock on his door. You slowly open it and see him behind his desk on his computer. You take a second looking at him, the gray hair mixing with his brown hair, the little bit of grey coming in on his beard. You never really had a thing for older guys…until now. You see him looking at his computer through the black frame glasses on his nose. He looks up, noticing you standing in the doorway, taking his reading glasses off and setting them on the desk. 

“You can come in, don't worry. ‘Aint too busy.” His deep voice breaks you out of your thoughts of admiring him. You nod, closing the door behind you. He motions for you to come closer, and you waste no time going around his desk. You see emails and his digital ledger on the screen. Next to the computer, he has a large brown leather book, his physical ledger, because he’s yet to feel the need to go completely digital. 

“You know you could probably make this into a spreadsheet. I could help instead of having this double thing you got going on.” You suggest as you open the old ledger, flipping through it. “How long have you had this thing, the 90s, the 80s, oh my god, since Kennedy?” 

Joel closes it, rolling his eyes at the dig of his age and the systems he currently has. His hands go onto your waist, gently pulling you down to sit in his lap. 

“My system has lasted me this long, so I’ll stick with it. Thank you very much. If it were up to me, everything would've remained paper. Damn, computer is hard to read and makes my eyes hurt lookin’ at it all day.” He turns you towards him a bit, changing your focus away from his computer. You lean down, kissing Joel, feeling the scruff of his greying beard against his face. 

Feeling the blood rush in your body, the both of you have been waiting all day to have your hands on each other. He runs his hands up your skirt, bunching it up further on your thighs. You feel his bulge under you, growing harder as you continue making out passionately. His hands squeeze your thighs harder you feel his hard cock pressing against you. 

“Seeing you in this fucking tight skirt all day was killing me, sweetheart. I just wanted to take you in here and fuck you on my desk.”  

You continue kissing him, his hands moving down to your panties, his fingers tracing over your covered core, feeling your wetness. Joel kisses his neck. 

“So wet already?…” He pulls your underwear down, tossing it with your skirt on his office floor. 

His eyebrows raise, looking at you as his fingers rub along the outside of your folds. You shift, humping against his hand for more relief focusing on how good his finger felt rubbing your swollen and needy clit. 

You whine incoherently, mumbling at his words, words failing to form as you get more aroused. He slowly slides two of his fingers inside you, slowly pumping in and out of your aching pussy; hearing the wetness forming, you melt against him, your back pressing against his chest as he spreads your legs while you're sitting in his lap. 

“This is what you wanted, huh? Wanted me to give this needy pussy attention. This pretty little pussy needed me, I can tell? Wanted me to finger fuck under the desk while I’m talking to my clients?” you moan more as he slides a second finger stretching you out. He feels your wetness coat his finger as he thrusts them inside, curling up and reaching your sensitive spot. 

You cry out more. “Joel Joel, Joel!” moaning out his name, your mouth opens, forming an O as he continues fucking you with his fingers feeling your climax building, but the feeling fades as you feel his fingers leave your dripping pussy. You groan disappointedly as you feel. You pout, looking back at him at the arousal still clouding your brain.

“Relax, relax. I’ll give ya what you want soon.” he places a hand on your shoulder, gently moving you off the familiar seat of his lap. You look at him, your face flush as you feel the room getting hotter. 

He softly kisses you quickly before his hard cock straining through his jeans as you kneel in front of him, unbuckling his belt, unzipping his jeans, and pulling them down along with his boxers. He stares down at you, his eyes full of lust as he watches you spit in your hand before slowly stroking his big cock, teasing him. He rolls his eyes back as he leans in the chair. 

After jerking him off, for a little you place his hard length in between your lips. You slowly insert the tip of his cock in your mouth, sucking on it and tasting the salty precum on your tongue.  

Joel groans as you tease him, not being able to take it anymore. He shoves his dick deeper into your mouth, making you choke. You followed his pace, bobbing your head up and down the length of his shaft, using your hands to jerk off the rest of what you couldn't fit in your mouth. 

“That’s it, that’s it. Attagirl, Take it all. Know you can.” You listen, taking him deeper in the back of your throat, your eyes watering. You relax, hallowing your cheeks; his office is filled with the sound of you gaging around his cock. 

“F-fuck, sweetheart, your mouth feels so good. You enjoy this, aren’t ya, sucking the cock of a man twice your age?”

You nod, trying to agree as he continues using your mouth; you look up at him and see his eyes rolling back closed as his chest heaves, still praising you as you suck him off. His grunts and moans get louder; he starts fucking your mouth for a bit, thrusting his cock deeper before letting you come up to catch your breath, taking his cock out of your mouth. 

“Fuck baby…bet your dad didn’t expect you to be on your knees for me every day after work when he suggested you come work for me, huh.” 

You wipe your mouth as you hear his joke, still on your knees, his hand still on your head, rubbing your hair.  “Just don't let it slip out on guys' night after a few beers. Don't know who he’d be more mad at, me or you.” 

You push the thought of anyone finding out about you and Joel in the back of your mind; you don’t want to think about what your dad will say or how he’ll scold you for sleeping with his best friend and your boss. 

He laughs as he grabs your hand, helping you stand up; he kisses you sloppy, crashing his lips onto yours. Tasting himself on your lips. “Don’t worry, ain’t gonna tell him.” 

 He holds your waist, unzipping your skirt and helping you step out of it. He moves it out of the way before moving you towards the desk; he watches you bend over the desk, can’t resist the urge to stare at your ass, he squeezes it before landing another smack on it. 

“You ready, baby girl?” he asks softly, still caressing your lower back. You nod, looking back at him. 

“Yes, yes, Joel, please. I need you,” you whine, not being able to wait any longer. Instead of giving in to what you want, Joel laughs lightly. 

“Sorry, baby, I couldn't hear you; what do you need?” He taunts you as he runs a finger along your folds, making you whimper as frustrated as his teasing. 

“Joel! Oh my god, just fuck me-” Your snappy sentence is cut short, interpreted by his big cock slowly entering the tip inside you; both of you gasp as he pushes more of his length inside you. 

“You just don't know when to shut up, do you, baby? I told you I’d give you want.” His voice is deep and condensing, which arouses more if you're being honest. 

He moves his hips a bit more, and your moans fill his office. And you feel him bottom out inside you, but he doesn't move, letting you get used to his size. After a minute, you nod, letting him know you could move. He slowly moves his hips, thrusting inside you, and you moan more as you feel him deep inside. 

“F-Fuck Joel, you’re so big. Feel you so deep,” Joel growls as his hips start moving faster; he grips your hips tightly fucking into you more. Joel’s office desk rattles underneath you from the force Joel was fucking you. 

“I know, baby, I know, baby. God, You feel so good. How’re you so tight every time? ‘Feel you clenching ‘round me, sweetheart.” his thrust gets faster. 

“Fuck-fuck Joel right there.” you moan as his hard cock stretches you out. You hear him groan as he fucks you harder after hearing the name. He pushes you down onto his desk, moving his papers and construction plans out of the way, off to the side. You feel his hand grab one of your legs, lifting it up onto the desk. The new angle has you feel more of him deeper inside your sensitive core; the arousal builds as you feel your release building, and Joel can, too. 

“Fuck…Joel��I’m-I’m.” You moan and whine as Joel continues thrusting inside you, helping you reach your release. He reaches a hand in between your thighs and rubs your clit as he continues fucking into you, bringing you closer to your climax. 

“C’mon baby, I feel you squeezing ‘round me. Know you’re close. Cum for me, sweetheart.” 

 You feel the knot in your lower stomach and hold on the desk as you cum around Joel’s cock. Your orgasm hits hard, and closing your eyes, you shudder, coming down from your release. 

“That’s it honey, that’s it. Good girl, fuck baby, ‘m not gonna last much longer, Jesus-.” Joel grunts as his thrust gets more and more sloppier. Joel presses deep inside you. He leans forward, pressing his chest against your back as cums. His warm load releases inside your sensitive cunt. You both let out a moan together before relaxing against his desk. You feel him slide out of him, you breathing heavily. 

Joel slowly pulls out after taking a couple of seconds to catch your breath. He lets out a low groaning “Goddamn.” 

He sits back on the chair. He gently grabs your waist, pulling you into his lap. You turn, pulling Joel into a kiss.

“I love you, sweetheart, but we gotta head out before the alarm comes on.” You nod, kiss his cheek, and then down his neck, feeling his hands on your waist.

“You don’t know the alarm code to your own construction office?” you ask a bit skeptically, but Joel just laughs and hands your skirt to you from the floor. 

“I know the code, smartass, just don't feel like messing with the damn thing.” he explains as he’s cleaning you off with a tissue. You nod before leaving his lap, putting your skirt and underwear back on as Joel adjusts his pants. 

“Oh shit, almost forgot. The Smiths said they want to change the hardwood they chose because they don’t think it matches the new wallpaper and wanted to expand the kitchen..” Joel turns his computer off, grabs his coat, and his hand goes to your waist, leading you out of his office. He listens to you tell him about the client from earlier. Ushering you out the door to his truck. 

“Honey… I don't work after 5 p.m., so you don't work after 5 p.m., come on.” He opens the passenger seat of his truck before getting in the driver's seat.

“I know, I just need to write it down so I don’t forget my boss is a real hard ass.” Joel rolls his eyes at your teasing, as he pulls out of the office parking lot leaving, to take you home.

[toomuchbirth]

Birth Quickie 4:

Boy

My best friend was having a hard time focusing on the movie we both were watching.

I couldn't really take your eyes off him. He was still just Brandon. I met the guy at work a couple years ago, started hanging out with after he moved into town. We’d both just clicked, and it was great.

Then he started getting real snappy with me out of nowhere a few months ago. I asked him what his deal was, and he told me to fuck off. I basically hadn’t talked to him or seen him since.

Until today. I got a call, he asked if I could come over, hang out. He said he really needed a friend today, someone he could trust. Before I hung up to head over, he made me promise not to freak out. Most important, I couldn't tell anybody what I saw.

He had poked his head around the door when he opened it. Motioned me in. “Ok man, what the hell is this-” I began, but stopped as I turned around to see him.

God. He was… it was… His favorite, biggest shirt didn’t even come close to covering the huge, hairy mound that was hanging off him. He still had his beard and mustache, arms still hairy and muscular. He was still in jeans.

“I think I’m having it today.” He said, unable to meet your eyes, one hand on his belly. “Uh… c-congrats?” I stammered out, just taking in the sight of him. I could see he clearly was exhausted already, he waddled gingerly away from the door, sat heavily onto the couch, motioned for me to come over.

“Heh. No. Not really a ‘congrats’ kinda thing. More a ‘What are you gonna do now.’ Damned if I know. I’m just so fuckin’ tired, man. I need this thing out of me. I need my life back.” His voice cracked. He blinked rapidly, still not looking at me. I couldn't stop staring at him. *He looks so good like this…* my brain told me, which I tried to ignore. *Imagine how he looks naked* was a follow up, which caused a familiar, shameful aching between my legs as I tried to remind myself he was my best friend and he clearly wasn't thrilled with his appearance.

“So. Uh… the… other dad?” I asked, and Brandon grimaced. “No other dad. Not even one, I’m not this things dad. I’m just gonna have it here, and then I need you to make it just… go away, ok? I have work tomorrow, I can't deal with finding a shelter or dropping it at a hospital after it comes. Fortunetly, I- Oh… fuck!” His words crushed into a pained growl. The pregnant orb shrank visibly as he held it. “Fuck… fuck… ok, ok, just… mngh…” he blinked rapidly, trying not to let tears come.

I watched Brandon have a contraction. God, I watched Brandon have a contraction. Brandon was pregnant. As the muscles relaxed, I asked “so… is this a, ah… magic thing? Or were you…” he waved me off. “Trans. I WISH it was magic. Wouldn't have been like this so long, probably. Might have even had a choice if it happened.”

My mouth went dry. “Was… God, Brandon did somebody-” “Shut it. You know enough. I’m about to push this thing out, hopefully soon. You’re gonna do me a solid, and take it away, and then I’ll pass out and head to work tomorrow. Then we never mention tonight again. Ok?”

What else could I say? My best friend turned on the movie and we both pretended to watch it. Or at least he did. I couldn't stop staring. *He’s so sexy.* My mind helpfully provided, as he groaned in pain again, holding his belly. *He’s about to have a baby, right here in front of you. You’re about to see everything!*

I ignored the thoughts. Tried to, at least. But I couldn’t stop drinking in his every curse and whimper. Noticing how his whole body flexed and strained with each contraction. It was breathtaking. His hands gripping the couch or his belly. The way his expression scrunched, his teeth grit, trying not to cry as his labor got more intense.

“Oh man… this one is big… they’re so close now… this is happening, man… it’s so bad!” The handsome trans man growled, and I watched him start wrestling at the waist of his pants. Trying to undo them.

“How close are they?” I asked, my mouth dry. “F-five minutes…” he forced out. “Help. Feel like I gotta use the bathroom. Think it means it's time. My body is.. trying to trick me… into pushing… God it hurts!”

I moved around in front of him. Ran my hands over his hairy belly. It felt so good… firm and full, the hair soft. Moved them down to his jeans. Undid the knot holding them shut, and the zipper opened on its own. He’d refused to buy maternity clothes, just getting more pregnant in secret. I wondered how he’d hidden it so long. It seemed so obvious like this.

I pulled at the laboring man’s pants and boxers. I could see pubic hair. Could see the swollen lips of his vagina. *It's so perfect…* my mind chimed in. *I want to touch it. This is so sexy… I get to watch him have a baby!* I shook my head and kept piling down, exposing his legs, until Brandon was naked from the waist down.

“It's so strong… I keep fighting it… it hurts, it hurts so bad!” The poor guy growled, before spreading his legs, and… pushing. God, Brandon was pushing… I couldn't believe it. His face was stunning, a scrunched mass of pain and effort. His thighs quivered and shook as he pushed. I moved into position, guiding his feet up to my shoulders, kneeling on the floor as he sat on the couch. I could feel how hard he was bearing down. See everything.

He hated this.

I loved this.

I watched as, push by push, his crotch bulged with the head. He groaned constant swears as, slowly, those damp, puffy lips began to part. The glistening of a head peeking out from inside him. Then opening him wider. Wider.

“I don't want it, I don't want it, It’s not fair!” He sobbed, unable to hold back anymore. “I never wanted a baby! It's so bad, it hurts so much! I didn't ask to get pregnant!”

What could I say? There was nothing behind vague support that could help. So I gave it. Telling him to be brave, be strong as he did the most amazing, beautiful thing I'd ever seen inches from my face.

He couldn't stop. Barely had time to breathe between contractions. The whole head gushed free. The shoulders bulged him even worse, but those too slipped out, the body slipping from his most intimate place.

I did as he asked, without a word. It was the least I could do after Brandon showed me something so amazing. Even if he didn't realize how much I would enjoy it.

He invited me to hang out a couple weeks later. We didn't talk about what happened. He was my best friend again, like nothing had changed. But I couldn't ever really see him the same way again…

[finnbin]

im sobbing im crying hes so :(

mudd week, day 4 - modern au

[flo-zoinks]

Headcanons for if anyone sat by them at the campfire and just started pulling strands of their hair out…😈

Chlo boo u high-key a freak but I fw it💀❤ I was laughing for a solid minute when I read this oh my goodness😭😭

WHAT I IMAGINE WOULD HAPPEN IF U SAT AT A CAMPFIRE AND STARTED PULLING OUT CHUNKS OF EADH RDR2 GANG MEMBERS HAIR.. (MY OPINION)

(Again as reactions differ greatly between people we are assuming here it's someone similar to John in terms of age gender and likeness around camp)

Arthur - exclaim like "what the hell are yu doing?!" Then leave camp for like a week until hes not mad

Hosea - lean back away from you and tell you off for being such a weird idiot, then just go back to whatever he was doing unfazed

Sadie - literally pounce on ur ass until someone like Arthur pulls you too apart, but she swears its not over and now you sleep scared

Dutch - push you off whatever your sitting on and tell you to leave camp until you get your head straight, then immediately go to the nearest mirror to fix himself

Molly - slap your hand away and look really offended, tell Dutch, then adjust her routine to be furthest from you in camp from now on in anxiety

Sean - be really confused, but try and laugh it off that you want to take his gorgeous looks out of jealousy

Lenny - probably would think it's a bit racially motivated so shove you and tell you that its not okay to do that then leave for the night to talk to Sean or Hosea

Abigail - slap ur face and ask what the hell you think you're doing, and make sure Jack stays away from you

John - give you a confused look and tell you smth like "what's wrong with you man" then leave

Javier - start shouting his ass off at you in spanish for ruining his fine looks and punch u to the ground. He dont freak w someone messing up his vanity

Jack - cry and tell Abigail who then slaps you for being a fool and 'nags' John to do something about it until he eventually tells you you're weird for that but stop because Abigail is annoying him

Mary-beth - move away and stare at you for a solid 10 seconds before saying "what the- please don't do that" then leave. Miss Grimshaw wouldn't let that slide though, and Tilly and Karen would give you evils for a good while

Tilly - exclaim (near shouting) "go away _ that's not normal!". Same as Mary-Beth past that w Grimshaw and Karen

Karen - shove you or punch you real hard, then go for a beer to calm down. Tilly would give you evils for a while. Karen would probably shout at you drunk hours after

Kieran - IM NOT AN O'DRISCOLL STOP IT!!!! Javier, Sean, Kieran and Bill probably jeered you on and patted you on the back after

Pearson - hair? Chunks of it? Be fr now

Charles - "stop that."

Trelawny - try and scare you with a magic trick pulling out some animal really close, then whilst your distracted from pulling his damn hair out he slaps your head and ridicules you

Strauss - (had to look up if he had hair lol) stand up offended and tell you off for your improper behaviour then leave to go work

Micah - firstly that hair would be greasy ass but if you chose to continue he'd try scare you to stop suddenly then talk for a good 5 minutes that you like all people are out to get him as hes a rare winner in a world of losers. If you were any minority he'd call you a slur too and blame ur identity. If you were a woman though he'd probably be into it

Grimshaw - tell you off for a good minute and say you've ruined her night as she goes to bed steaming. The girls would later get really mad at you for putting her in a bad mood

Reverend - insist you are hurting a kind priest, but whilst drunk ask you why you hate him then vent that so does God

Bill - beard hair right....? Grab your hand and pull you UNCOMFORTABLY close to warn you, then shove you away angrily saying you got lucky this time loser

Uncle - same w the beard hair right?? Yell out at you the most ABSURD CRUEL insults then tell you that you can pull chunks of his ass hair to. Hopefully you leave before he flashes you.

Thanks for asking me omg💀💀!! Tell me who I forgot yall xx

[felassanis]

God everyone wants to be the smartest person in the room they come out dumber than ever

I recently made a tiktok where I found out via camera mode that Takemura has nose hairs. But V and Oda did not. I thought it was funny because what a fun detail! And it's funny to imagine V and Oda pluck their noses whereas Goro let's it run wild.

But now I've an influx of people and if they're not adding the 125th comment that says "some beards in the cc have the nose hair it's not that deep" (I promise I read the first 10 comments pointing this out you don't need to keep telling me) then they're accusing me of bullying the fictional old man because "this is normal. It's just old age," "he's old that's why he has it"

ASSUMING I DON'T KNOW HUMAN BEINGS HAVE NOSE HAIR FIRSTLY. And NO! Goro being old ISN'T WHY HE HAS IT. Goro ISN'T REAL. He has it because CDPR gave him nose hair! IT'S AN INTENTIONAL DETAIL. Whereas they didn't bother giving everyone nose hair equally THAT'S WHY IT'S FUNNY OH MY GOD TAKE A JOKE

[bunnyinvanilla]

after hours at the bar with quiet/soft music + really fluffy slow dance with price. like they’re both just staring at each other with heart eyes ugh.

please listen to a song from the 80s while reading this lil one shot, i was listening to lady in red whilst writing, but any romantic song about love would set the perfect atmosphere…im gonna sob cause i love this old man

everyone’s gone home, it’s only you and price there, tables clean, soft, lovesick songs from the 80’s playing on the background.

“oh, I love this song” you murmur softly, taking off your high heels and setting them on a stool. John has packed the money and turned down all the lights, aside from the tiny one on the back of the bar — the room is now covered in a gold feeble glow, the dark brown of the wooden floor and tables unable to catch it and reflect it.

you’re an avid 80s music listener, john was pleasantly surprised and impressed upon discovering that your favorite songs were hits from his time, especially during the first proper date, when you showed him your playlist and it was completely filled with songs as old as him. “guess you like everything that’s old and vintage, mmh?”

“went pretty hard during my old days,” he says, walking over to you, his gaze flickering to your bare stockings “all the couples dedicated it to each other”

“so sweet, my parents have it on their wedding tape” you smile to yourself, remembering all the times you’d sit on the floor and replay in on the tv as a little girl (well, littler than now, at least)

“who knows doll, maybe I was a guest that day and attended their celebration” he joked, like he always did regarding your evident large too large age gap.

“very funny, sir,” you reply with a soft tug of your brows, “you were probably a lieutenant, busy charming civilian girls”

“was busy saving the country, you mean, little lady” he retorts, filling the space of your hips with his hands and pulling you in. You had john promise you that when closing, the radio would be the last thing to be turned off, just to create a cozy, dreamy atmosphere in the dimly lit space.

“when are you gonna ask me to marry you, daddy?”

john almost stumbles on in own tracks. His arm securely slides further around your lower back, pulls you closer to him until he envelopes your tiny waist completely, a hungry expression that you usually only see when he’s laying you somewhere, spreading your thighs to accommodate him, when your whines echo softly to him, and replace the sounds of gunfire,

when he gazes his scarred fingers against your skin like a soldier crossing a landmine, when you feel soft on his hands, not heavy like his rifle.

or when he throws kisses like grenades into the trenches of your mouth.

“you wanna marry this old war dog, angel?” he mumbles lowly, his gaze softening into an half lidded expression, heavy with such an intense warmth and desire that you feel your knees weaken like vanilla pudding. “be wed to an old bastard in the army?”

“do you want to?” with the softest, most innocent voice, you bestow your doe, big doll eyes upon him, he doesn’t feel deserving of such a sight. “love me properly before God?”

“He already knows how I feel about you, princess” he mutters back, voice thickened with a rough edge, so deep and husky it almost sounds like a whisper that should belong to nightly affairs.

“mmh, but He’d want you to prove it,” you tickle his beard with your breath and your delicate voice, bottom lip trapped underneath your teeth — your pupils heart shaped, pouring out all the love you feel for him, you literally feel like one of those animated cartoon characters when they’re in love, heart beating out of their chest and eyes the color of and shape of big hearts.

your hand flattens on his chest, as he gently cradles you to the song’s rhythm, your feet standing on his boots, so that with every step, he takes you with him.

“is that what you want, a ring on your little finger? everyone calling you lady price? marry your fuckin’ sugar daddy?”

and he can feel how you shiver against him at the thought, thin sparks of excitement running down your lower back and shooting against his palm.

each note of the song seems to pull you closer, a quiet conversation between your hearts. His hand, steady yet tender, rests on the small of your back, guiding you with a slow, deliberate grace as the other one takes ahold of your own, too large and big compared to your hand.

john presses a kiss on your knuckles, his beard tickling the pearly, milky skin. Pretty hands, never had to carry a deadly weapon, never will.

“I can see myself fit the unconventionally too young wife pretty well , sir..a savior of the country marrying his sugar baby, I can also see that on the news” you giggle against him, resting your cheek on his hard, muscular chest.

he’s got a old body, you’ve got a old, romantic soul, he wants you all to himself, and since you are already his in every way possible, it wouldn’t hurt him or his pocket to just slip a ring on your finger.

[veryinnovative]

GOING INSANEEEE GOING INSANE. i need 2 backtrack to the light absorption. i MUST. bc u have sated viktor not understanding why jayce is tripping over his own feet, pulling open drawers nd shit obviously looking for candles, muttering to himself. i think that-- part of this. should remain in human form and that light sources react to his emotions!! i just think it would be soooo sexy. we must keep that

the blanket......it'd be so funny if viktor's species have this mating ritual that is like. A specific amount of gifts equates to a potential partner trying to court you. a few gifts indicates friendship/alliance but once a certain maximum is reached it's like. Final. the XYZ month mating ritual has started. also the realization of cold is SO sexy of you im so serious....i can imagine human viktor realizing he has a lung capacity now and--god, he has to BREATHE. he needs air. so it's him huffing puffing struggling like he's run a marathon till it steadies and he figures out how to breathe. [ofc jayce can sleep through a hurricane so he doesn't realize viktor is very much trying not to die in his newly acquired human form] the thing abt viktor not knowing how to use his hands or limbs or anything is so cute rly bc he is like a baby doe and so gangly just rolling over the floor and burrito-ing himself. also adapting to his environment bc it is Dark and he cant see Shit but can only hear Jayce's slight snoring and the gentle barely-there thrum of the fridge and other electronics, the draft of the wind outside, and anything else his human ears pick up on.

its the way jayce CANNOT catch a break. his stubble has turned into a beard. bags under his eyes. cant remember the last time he had a proper shower instead of a quick baby towel wipe-down. he wakes up,, expecting today is the day he can finally shave and wash his hair and enjoy the warm stream of water but no. no bc life hates him. and there's a naked man on his floor blinking up at him wrapped in a blanket he gave the alien he was accomodating. gorgeous, yes. unknown? also yes. he doesn't even scream at this point. they just share eye contact and jayce has this little mental breakdown laugh bc why not? life's got it absolutely against him. he is almost-yelling at the man 'what are you doing here' and 'how did you get in' and 'oh my god are you--there is an ALIEN in this house you need to LEAVE' only for his rambling to be broken by a hungry growl of viktor's stomach..who after a stretch of silence goes... 'f-o-o-d' in the exact same manner jayce had when he first tried feeding viktor in the lab and that's when everything dawns on him. and of course that is the perfect moment caitlyn of all people come barging into his apartment bc ofc she has the keys

shitshow 19.24234 spirals out of control of course bc caitlyn is going 'oh! oh. i didn't know--seriously jayce, you could have warned me at least' and jayce is waving his arms like 'it's not what you think it is--really. it--' 'dont call your hookup an it, jayce! he's right there' 'no, you don't get it. it--he--whatever is an alien!' 'what--'

and in the meantime viktor is trying to grapple his way up to his wobbly legs, not at all understanding what the humans are saying bc caitlyn nd jayce are still in a heated discussion of 'seriously your phone's been turned off for two days now your mom got worried!' 'she better be because there is an alien in my house' 'if you call him an alien one more time'

i dont know. i think caitlyn brushes past jayce and to viktor to talk to him. of course, viktor doesn't understand shit. he's hungry and confused and can only pinpoint they're displeased with one another. caitlyn is talking to him like. 'im sorry he called you that. idk whats wrong with him his mom deffo raised him better. he's being such an ass he is probably just tired.' and gradually gets confused and concerned bc viktor is just staring blankly at her before mimicking jayce from xyz days ago and going 'food' with a very butchered pronunciation [also of course rubbing over his stomach bc that's what jayce did to act out hunger when he first trying feeding him] and caitlyn goes awfully quiet. and the room is quiet. and they're all staring at each other. and jayce thinks he is about the have an aneurysm. and caitlyn very quietly goes 'jayce. why do you have an alien in your room?' and jayce tries explaining, although not very well and then caitlyn interrupts and goes 'jayce. why do you have an alien in your room. naked?'

and then hell really breaks out between them in the most sibling-like manner of disputes and in the background u just have viktor shuffling over the floor trying to walk. [i think that his existing injury/condition should also transfer to his human form. meaning he needs a cane or smth to support him in his gait] so now he's just clinging to the walls, babysteps, trying to aim for the kitchen bc he remembers jayce storing food there.

this is getting so awfully long ims o sorry but i think that by the time caitlyn and jayce finish talking, they hear a little crash coming from the kitchen and whirl around their heads to see a pot's lid on the floor and viktor eating leftover kraft mac and cheese with his hands. raises his stained fingers to them before going 'food'. caitlyn punches jayce in the shoulder nd murmurs 'give him some clothes'

@wordsofwilderness tag <3

okay so for alien!viktor do we think that jayce was messing with hexcore/tech and that’s what brought viktor into his world? or do we think hexcore is something that pops into existence alongside viktor? or it’s like kryptonite for him??? or something else??? omg my brain is quivering i am so close to abandoning all my responsibilities just to churn out a fic w this concept auuuuUgH 🗣️

me dropping my work immediately after receiving this msg:

ok. Okay. i think . jayce uncovers hexcore/tech and tinkers with it, not knowing that a certain rune sequence in combination with, i don't know, a certain component (time of the day. maybe also blood. whatever it may be. some other artifact they once retrieved, etc etc) triggers it to activate as this one-way passage that pretty much DRAGSSSS viktor to earth in jayce's lab. mayhaps he arrives in a vegetative state as we discussed and comes to be in a span of a few days while jayce studies him/tries not to freak out/refuses to sleep for the entirety of said x days

curious tall alien viktor crawling over jayce......who is sprawled on the floor bc he tripped nd fell in his shock... you know how we as humans can coo on small beings nd just wanna. Touch. that is viktor. jayce also mistakes his thrumming sound for like,, him wanting to Eat/Kill him or smth and tries not to pass out.....vik's long talon-like fingers carefully dragging down jayce's scalp to his face...to his neck......the pad gently pressing into his pulse there bc what is this curious jack-rabbit-y feel.....

anyways...ANYWAYS.. [pulling up a google docs for us]

[bedforddanes75]

give me a man with a STOMACH. give me a man i can GRIP wtf

[chrisbunnys]

just remembered how much i miss matt's horse necklace. im drooling, screaming and crying.

[bikers-in-leather]

🥵🔥❤️‍🔥

[thespiralstaircasewriter]

He he, thanks for the tag! Here's my dialogue, I selected from a still unpublished chapter of my thorki WIP on ao3 "Last Exit for the Lost".

Some backstory:

The two Odinsons have both been banned to Midgard, where they live and work, under the appearance of Tom Hiddleston and Chris Hemsworth.

However, now Loki is travelling on his own incognito, having reverted to his original Asgardian looks, although in Midgardian clothes. At present, he decided to get away from everything, and he’s staying at a nondescript motel in Mexico, when Thor, who is after him, happens to stop at the same motel one evening. Thor doesn’t know the motel is his brother’s hideaway, so Loki decides to avoid him, and to watch unobserved. Later, though, he will have to change his mind, because Thor somehow manages to get very, very drunk, and troublesome.

Late at night, Thor can’t find his key and is terribly loud in the corridor, so Loki comes out to shush him, and eventually takes him in, while drunk Thor zooms in on his brother’s face, and babbles stupidly: “Oh you’re such a preeeetty girl!”

“I am no girl, I’m a man.” says Loki. “Oh but you’re too pretty... for a man! Too pretty!”, Thor goes on for quite a while, and gets handsy, while Loki gently fends off his outpourings of affection, until Thor finally faints on the couch.

THE MORNING AFTER

“I almost didn’t recognize you, brother!”

“Oh, right, almost! It took you, like… minutes! However, it’s a long time since we last saw each other’s… face. Brother.”

Thor shrugs and scratches the blond fuzz of his beard: “Hemsworth’s face suits me just fine… I just grow big dog hair, wear sunglasses, and I’m Mr Any Biker, or Truck Driver!”

“Right… Just, real... huge, and blond, and sort of, how shall I say... god-handsome?”

“Of course! ...Why? Look around! You get blokes like that!”

“Sure I do. All. The. Time.”

“Not you-You! ...Blokes. Around!...You know what I mean!”

Loki crosses arms around himself, turning away with a small sigh and mouthing to himself: I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

So, this is it! And if that's no bother, I'd pass the tag on to @meibruges

Beginning this year literarily by sharing a dialogue (thank you for the dialogue tag @physalian ) and the drawings I've made for Glint of Silver last year. Now excuse me as I show you some of the sappiest corniest (could-be-heavily-inspired-by-something?) dialogue I’ve ever written, by your aroace writer truly

“I would like to kiss you. I dearly wish to know if you actually taste like roses.” “Or steel.” “Perhaps, but I think you would be sweet to kiss.” “You think so? Yet I am giving you no reason to think so.” “I know it is so. I know that your kisses will be made all that much sweeter by the wait.” “What if you will wait forever?” “Then I’ll die dreaming of them and it will be the sweetest of deaths.”

Glint of Silver, ch. 25 - The Unwitting Suitor

(Anyone who sees this consider yourself tagged–I'm shy and not good at making friends, I'll never tag without explicit invite. @lucianalight you’re currently my lifebuoy lol)

[hannibalseclectictiecollection]

✨️✨️✨️NEW HUGH✨️✨️✨️

NEW YORK, NY. Hugh Dancy at the SAG-AFTRA picket line on Oct 03 2023

[yoursistheonlyocean]

This might be my favorite video of Alex EVER

Credit: @scummyman on IG

[acamble]

why didn’t anyone warn me alex looked so stupidly hot during the series 11 tasks???????

the flight attendant getup with the skinny tie and short sleeves, tattoo on full display and then to top it off his HAIR. HIS GODDAMN HAIR.

he looks so scruffy and wild ….. i love scruffy alex