#the au™ (currently nameless)

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Mike

"getting laid" is very hot and sexy. "getting off"? great news as well. so you would think "getting laid off" would be wonderful news for your penis. but alas

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Junko Bohoja, the angel of tragedy

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So I've headcanoned Benrey to be allergic to cats from the get-go. Idk, always was struck with the thought that the dude was allergic to cats. But after seeing @/melkamay's art of Benrey and his little black cat friend, I came up with the idea that he finds a rather anomalous black cat in an alleyway whilst on the walk home. Anomalous in the fact that it doesn't trigger his allergies. He doesn't try to take it home (it wouldn't go over with his aquarium of goldfish [but that's a headcanon for another time]) but he does befriend it and give it a name (Joystick). Idk, just thought the people of Tumblr would enjoy my HLVRAI Benrey brainrot ramble.

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Jeremy: Do you understand? Taiyo: I'm nine, not stupid. Jeremy: *inhales, sighs* That's my boy...

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Henry

Love love love characters that present themselves as emotionally open social butterflies but the more you see of them the more obvious it is that they’re the most closed off fuckers in the story. Sure, they want to help you with your personal problems and messy emotions, but if you turn that shit back on them, they’ll shut down or deflect every time. Why are you sticking your nose in their business anyway? It’s not like it matters. They’re not a person, they’re just a role being played. They’re the guy who fixes things and saves people. Please ignore the man behind the mask, he’s fine. Everything’s fine.

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Ningyo Okami // Monster - EXO

I'm creeping in your heart, babe. I'll flip you over, break you down, and swallow you up. I'll steal you and indulge in you. I'm gonna mess you up. I'm engraved in your heart. So even if I die I'll live forever. Come here, girl boy! You. Call. Me. Monster. I'll go into your heart~

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Kanji: Might fuck around and take NyQuil and DayQuil at the same time.

William: Tried that once, don't fucking do that.

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Keiko: I got called a weeaboo today at school. Keiko: Keiko: I'm literally Japanese.

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Kenny Bishop // Pity Party - Melanie Martinez

It's my party and I'll cry if I want to, cry if I want to. (Cry, cry, cry.) I'll cry until the candles burn down this place. I'll cry until my pity party's in flames.

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William Bishop // Little Monster - Royal Blood

I've got love on my fingers, lust on my tongue. You say you got nothing, so come out and get some. Heartache to heartache. I'm your wolf, I'm your man. I say 'Run, little monster, before you know who I am.'

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KanJere

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William: My sense of taste is gone from my coffee consumption today.

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Older!Kenny: This bear that I used to play with as a kid just died in front of me completely. It used the last of the energy in its battery to tell me it loved me. I love you too, little bear. But not when you're making me piss myself.

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(in the group chat) Bryan: Lacroix tastes like your drink is still buffering Carl: Cola addicts usually think like this, imagine having taste buds so fried and oversaturated you can't enjoy La Croix, must be like the food eating equivalent of being a BDSM freak who can't get off without five dudes and a car battery Terrence: imagine having such a superity complex over drinking carbonated water that you compare soda to bdsm Freddy: imagine enjoying a la croix

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TerreNing

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William: I'm gonna make you choke on your words one of these days. Kanji: You underestimate my lack of a gag reflex. William: