#the apocalypse must be nigh

[fincalinde]

It always baffles me when I see WWX written as promiscuous. This is the guy who canonically makes it into his twenties (and then technically into his thirties) with his only sexual experience being one (1) kiss of dubious consent with LWJ when he's blindfolded at the Phoenix Mountain hunt.

WWX is an incorrigible flirt, but he takes even the simple act of kissing seriously. He's supposedly 'saved' his first kiss for twenty years, and when it's taken from him he responds by coping in his usual way: externalising any potential distress or uncertainty by being superlatively obnoxious.

A black outfit and a devil-may-care attitude do not necessarily equate to promiscuity, and this all feeds into the larger point: the importance of looking past the way WWX tries to present himself and focusing on what his actions actually tell us about him. Rather than being a promiscuous contrast to LWJ's prudishness, WWX's attitude to sex and relationships is actually a big part of why he and LWJ are compatible.

[911lsbts]

The end is near—and not just for this spinoff that remained on Fox after the LAPD-set mothership moved to ABC. In a plot inspired in part by a real-life meteor strike in Siberia, the Austin-based crew prepare as an asteroid barrels toward Texas.

“We had this very apocalyptic feeling, just finding out that our show was going to end in Season 5 instead of what we would’ve hoped,” admits showrunner Rashad Raisani, who learned of Lone Star‘s impending doom back in September. “So a big part of this season has been about pushing our characters to an existential threat–level crisis way earlier in life than they would’ve expected.”

Raisani credits show writers James Leffler and Molly Green with the Deep Impact-caliber idea. “They always have these great high-concept ideas that they’ve taken from real life and so they had been wanting for years to do an asteroid storyline, based on an incident that happened in Siberia when a meteor fell and it blew out windows for like 60 square miles…and we just thought, okay, well that feels like the right idea,” he continues. “Sometimes life just takes you where it hurts when you least want it to or expect it, so let’s do that on a grand scale!”

Thankfully, Leffler and Green had done their homework seasons earlier, looking at everything from timelines to the environmental fallout, post-impact. “They had all this research so that we could, as ridiculous as it sounds, really ground this in the reality of what happened in Russia in terms of how the thing hit the atmosphere and then what happened, how it broke apart,” offers Raisani, readily admitting the plot also has a popcorn aspect to it.

“Even though it’s, of course, this sort of absurd billboard-level kind of thing that could happen, we wanted to ground it because again, the hope is — and I think when you watch the episodes, you will see — as crazy as it is, it all ends up coming back to a place of character and how these people go through this crucible.”

Some of them may not go through it well. The action kicks off in the January 27 episode, which features “a flash-forward at the beginning that just makes you go, ‘Oh, my God,’” Raisani previews. “Something really crazy and terrible is happening. As we roll it back, you start to go, ‘Wait a second, this asteroid… Oh God, I think I know what is going to happen because of the asteroid!'” Amid all of the chaos — “our last couple emergencies are motivated by what people do when they think the apocalypse is nigh” — Raisani reveals that the penultimate episode also includes “one of my favorite cases…we have [Seinfeld‘s] Wayne Knight making an appearance in probably the most Wayne Knight role since Newman!”

In the finale, though, there is little room for laughs. As more emergencies erupt due to the fast-approaching catastrophe, first-responders Tommy (Gina Torres), Judd (Jim Parrack), and Captain Owen (Rob Lowe) must either settle or put aside deeply personal matters to save the day along with the rest of Station 126. To wit: Tommy’s valiant fight against cancer, Judd’s ongoing efforts to remain sober, and Owen’s potential career shift. “If we’ve done our jobs, you’re watching these three characters, each carrying around what they believe is an existential burden, about to unburden themselves with each other,” sets up Raisani. “And just at that moment — if you remember what happened in Hawai’i a few years ago when there was that [false] missile detection alert — everybody’s phones go off.” And as 9-1-1 fans know, once that happens, it’s all hands on deck. “The telephone is central to our DNA and we did it that way so that everybody gets that alert, which is how it would really happen.”

What the alert informs our team is unclear, but Raisani will confirm that the asteroid’s trajectory has a very intentional end-point. “We looked at the real city of Austin and thought, ‘What’s the worst thing that could possibly happen and where’s the worst place that it could happen if something hit it?’ And so we started to build the episode around that and it meant putting our team in the most dangerous place they could be.”

Without spoiling anything, we do know that there will be blood. “This will be the most casualty-strewn rescue since the pilot, when the entire team except for Judd blew up [in a factory fire] and died,” warns Raisani. “We decided who should get hurt and who should get hurt the worst in a way to show the depths of both their own characters and the character of the people next to them.” Still, he adds, “I’m a big believer that the worst circumstances of life will bring out the best in people,” promising a massively heroic rescue by these everyday heroes.

“Our final sequence, which I believe may be the high watermark of our series, is literally every character working together and doing their own part toward the same singular goal… It’s all about one single moment.”

[aziraphales-library]

Hi there! First off, thank you so much for y’all’s work here on Tumblr, def one of my main sources of fic recs.

I read Summer’s End by FeralTuxedo a while ago (lovely rec) and am definitely back in my TLOU-apocalyptic-setting-with-a-moody-but-calm/nature-esk-atmosphere-and-character-centred-plot era again. I just genuinely enjoyed the specific atmosphere that the apocalyptic setting gives works. Anyway, that being said, I would love any recs that would fit that kind of vibe (I would prefer less smut since I skip over it but honestly as long as it isn’t specifically plot-relevant its fine lol also not TOO much angst please, I cant deal with Az or Crow actually dying or something like that unless it is done in a comforting way).

ps: on a more specific request, if y’all know of any GO fics inspired by TLOU I would greatly appreciate recs (look, Bill and Frank’s episode in the tv adaptation is screaming to be written as a fic with Az and Crow instead- Bill and Frank’s deaths are wht I mean by deaths done in a comforting way I suppose, haha).

Wow, this is a long request, so sorry. Thank you so much for reading, have a great day and happy new year!

Hello! Pretty sure we've recommended almost all of these before, but there aren't loads of this kind of fic (and I could find no The Last of Us specific fics)...

Dead Genres by A_plus_platypus (T)

The end is nigh when a zombie virus ravages the world. Luckily, there is hope yet in the form of pharmaceutical scientist Anthony "Just Crowley" Crowley. With his adopted younger brother Adam, his other three kids The Them, and English teacher Aziraphale Fell, he searches for the fated military base in Tadfield. There, they — along with the rest of the world — have a chance at survival. And also Crowley is a disaster, and Aziraphale is a disaster, and everyone needs a hot cup of tea.

what's to come by PepperPrints, restlesslikeme (M)

Post-Apocalyptic AU. Even without the Antichrist, both Heaven and Hell insist on Armageddon. Aziraphale is missing and Crowley sets out to find him, driving through a scorched Earth with a witch in his passenger seat.

is there anybody out there? by theycallmeDernhelm (E)

Welcome to the zombie apocalypse. England has been overrun by walking corpses, everything's gone to hell, and the few survivors are scattered- among them, Crowley and his 11-year-old son Warlock. When Crowley's radio signal is unexpectedly picked up by another group of survivors, he finds himself falling, in a way he never thought he'd fall again, for the charming and kindly Aziraphale. Over three seasons and a tenuous radio connection, a romance develops between them, while a friendship grows between Warlock and Aziraphale's nephew Adam. Love isn't dead (or undead) after all.

Ouroboros Forever and One by iblankedonmyname (T)

An AU where the Apocalypse-Definitely-Did, Aziraphale is a cowboy and Crowley is on a mission from God to reboot the universe. “God gave you, a demon, a mission?” Aziraphale snaps his glass onto the table. “Millions of angels at Her disposal, and yet…” His eyes are sparkling again. It’s more refreshing than a glass of tequila in a waterless land. “You?” His eyes slip from Crowley’s toes up to the top of his head. “Well, I am certainly surprised.”

Zombie Apocalypse by AppleSeeds (T)

When a meteor strikes Earth carrying a virus that can 'turn people into zombies', Aziraphale finds himself responsible for a group of frightened teenagers at an airbase-turned-hospital in Tadfield. Aziraphale is terrified, but experiences some relief when the teens introduce him to Crowley, who has a plan to get them all to safety. When things don't exactly go according to plan and with the zombies closing in, Aziraphale must face his fears in order to protect the children from becoming infected.

My Favorite Ghost by cassieoh_draws, DiminishingReturns (T)

Decades after the world didn’t end, Heaven and Hell got their war — and nearly destroyed everything in the process. When Aziraphale finally manages to reacquire a corporation and return to Earth, he discovers he was gone longer than he thought and the planet has become unrecognizable. As he searches for Crowley and tries to figure out how he fits in a world that Heaven, Hell, and God have all wiped their hands of, nature works around him to reclaim the bones of an old civilization as the scraps of humanity build a new one. A lush and optimistic post-apocalypse story, told from the POV of an immortal who can't let go of the past.

And the one you mentioned...

Summer's End by FeralTuxedo (E)

2095. Britain is a post-apocalyptic wasteland ravaged by droughts, the collapse of civilisation, and hordes of the undead. Despite that, Aziraphale’s life is actually pretty good. He has his caravan, his books, and his work, offering his services to the men who stop by Tadfield on their arduous journey north. One day, a mysterious stranger knocks on his door. Crowley is charming and handsome and he appears to know his way around a vegetable garden. He comes with the tempting offer of a mutually beneficial arrangement. But it’s in Aziraphale’s best interest not to get too attached. A dystopian cottagecore sex worker AU.

- Mod D

[positivelybeastly]

From the Ashes Infinity Comics #15: Pygmalion, Part 1

So, for those who are not aware - Infinity Comics are online-only comics distributed through Marvel Unlimited, their subscription based app and browser collection of comics. Regarded as 'inessential,' but still very much canon, the raft of Infinity Comics coming out of From the Ashes have been quite good, but I haven't seen fit to comment on them for a bit, until now, because . . .

Let's go.

For those not aware, Pygmalion is a famous novel by George Bernard Shaw, detailing the attempt by a phonetics professor called Henry Higgins to 'elevate' a Cockney flower-girl named Eliza Doolittle.

Intrigued by a bet that he could pass her off as a duchess through careful schooling, he decides to take her on, and though he succeeds, she ends up feeling marginalised and overlooked, treated as an object of gambling and curiosity rather than an individual in her own right, and though the play is best known for the 'culturing' of Eliza Doolittle, it is as much about the arrogance of Higgins, who is a thoroughly unpleasant and rude individual, in thinking that he has any ownership over Eliza for his education of her. He may have 'created' her, but he does not control her.

The Factory that the X-Men are living in at present must have really good central heating for Cyclops to be wearing basketball shorts and a crop top that short.

Beast is currently investigating some kind of issue with Magneto's chromosomes - to put it succinctly, he appears to be ageing rapidly, and does not have access to his X-gene at present. This is a continuation of the storyline in the previous Infinity arc, which focused on Magneto.

Something worth noting - this is the first acknowledgement of the fact that though Hank's body may be of roughly the same physical age as his original, his mind is considerably younger, situated at some point in his mid 20s. For someone who was always the oldest of the original X-Men, this is fairly significant.

Also worth noting - Hank joins the ranks of superheroes who are actively seeking therapy for their problems! Good on you, Hank! And good on you, too, Scott, for suggesting it. Though, perhaps, given recent developments in the mainline X-Men comics, you should take your own advice . . .

The fact that Hank refers to himself as the only one left seemingly confirms that X-Force took care of the Beast clones who Beast Prime planted around various landmarks as part of the Ghost Calendars arc. Though they were defeated in their respective future timelines, I wasn't quite sure if they had been taken care of in the present as well. This seemingly confirms that they were.

Hank's therapist is Dr. Andrea Sterman, a supporting character from Jed MacKay's Moon Knight run, and a member of the Midnight Mission. Given that the writer, Alex Paknadel, confirmed on Twitter that he talked with Jed MacKay about making sure all the details for Hank's storyline would line up with the mainline X-Men book, I can only imagine this was done as a rather fun continuity nod.

Hank also refers to a Shi'ar warship, an avian alien race that the X-Men deal with on a regular basis. This makes sense, given that Hank was beamed aboard the Shi'ar imperial flagship during the events of Dark Phoenix Saga in 1981 - ancient history for us, but relatively fresh in Hank's mind, given his memories come from 1985.

Hank, naturally, does himself a disservice here. Dark Beast was, assumedly, abducted at a relatively young age from his human parents, and indoctrinated by Mister Sinister as something of a protege - a protege living in perpetual fear of his mentor. He probably didn't have a chance to develop any kind of moral code divorced from the social Darwinist hellhole that is the Age of Apocalypse.

That being said, Hank probably lacks that context, and Dark Beast is unique among Age of Apocalypse denizens, not just for his unerringly cruel nature, having never shown any altruistic tendencies (unlike, say, AoA Cyclops or Nightcrawler), but also for his resilience. He persists, even now - though last seen in Immortal X-Men #9 as a head in a jar, he has come back from the dead at least twice before, and it is unlikely he is gone for good.

Fun fact - his appearance here is based on the costume he wore during his scrap with Emma Frost's X-Men team in a confrontation with Spider-Man and the Lizard. Though the X-Men naturally encountered him after this point, it's fun that this appearance by Dark Beast is considered iconic enough to be the 'definitive' look for him by this comic.

Hank's final remark, about 'Henry McCoy plus time equals atrocity,' is a sentiment often repeated on social media boards, and it's interesting to see it being internalised by Hank himself, given his unique perspective on the events that created his future self and the other potential timelines the X-Men files likely refer to.

Mm. A lot to unpack here.

Hank's relationship with his X-gene has always been complicated, and the way he views it here, as essentially morphing him into a shape that he finds abhorrent, predatory, and beyond his control, is consistent with how Hank seemed to see himself during his feline mutation, which lasted from 2000 to 2013.

Though his feline phase is not referenced in this comic, beyond the 'over time, and with a little help, these became more pronounced,' (probably a reference to Sage's jumpstarting his secondary mutation) it assumedly would be in the files Hank has been using to catch up, and one has to wonder if he's been repeating some of the thought processes that made feline Hank such a uniquely neurotic version of the character.

It's also nice to see a canonisation of my long held fanon that Hank's X-gene is actively attempting to craft a form for him that is best suited for survival, a belief that Hank only hinted at back in Morrison's New X-Men, but which made sense, given the circumstances of his mutation in X-Treme X-Men.

That being said, Hank's own mind seemingly strays back to the night his furry mutation first manifested at the Brand Corporation in Amazing Adventures, where he flew into a berserker rage and nearly killed Carl Maddicks, which always seemed a little incongruous with how Hank was written in subsequent appearances in Avengers and Defenders, but which now seems to be retroactively made an expression of the brutality he was capable of during his feline phase.

The 'violent upheavals' Hank refers to here are likely his initial secondary mutation, and then his near-death experience when said mutation randomly destabilised in All-New X-Men. It could also be a reference to his numerous genetic troubles during X-Factor volume 1.

His opining that he found refuge in the life of the mind is very reminiscent of Hank's desire to find meaning in poetry, literature, art, humanity, in the wake of the changes in his body in both X-Factor and New X-Men. X-Factor #33 and New X-Men #117 both specifically reference his delight in the freedom to think, in opposition to the clouding of the mind that came with his Pestilence inflicted dumbing down, or his newly awakened predatory impulses.

Ironically enough, Magneto is, aside from Simon Williams, the character with whom this version of Hank has shared the most panel time and dialogue, between his conversations in X-Men and previous From the Ashes Infinity Comics. It would appear that Max's need for a cure for his condition are fostering a necessarily stronger bond than Hank and Max have ever shared before in canon.

Precisely where the rest of the team is during the course of these events is unknown. If I had to guess, it's possible this might be set during the events of X-Men #2, where the rest of the team was attending to a mutant rescue in San Francisco, accounting for the lack of availability of the Marauder and a reliance on an old Quinjet.

Quite how Hank got his hands on said Quinjet is unknown, though it's possible it might be a holdover from Hank's Defender days, where he would regularly borrow a Quinjet from the Avengers, for purposes ranging from actual superhero missions to attending Patsy Walker's wedding.

Though this Hank's memories originate in closest proximity to the Defenders, and though that team did enjoy some degree of notoriety under Hank and Candy Southern's stewardship, the Avengers have always been where Hank was most popular in-universe, and he has had a habit of using that association to smooth things over in mutant related books, such as in X-Factor volume 1 and the 90s X-Men run.

Unfortunately, mutant rights are in a more dire state than ever before, with things having seemingly gotten only worse for them since the 1980s, and it's likely Hank didn't expect this level of hatred from normal civilians.

I have, unfortunately, run out of images, so I'll be posting the last of this issue and my final thoughts and predictions in another post.

[vroomvroomwee]

The way Good Omens shows us how unhealthy and detrimental going to the extreme can be. Because look at it.

It's full with contrast. Angel demon. Witchfinder witch. Children against the literal manifestation of death and destruction. Heaven Hell. Etc. Even Crowley and Aziraphale's, as well as Nina and Maghie's, personalities differ from each other.

And especially if you look at Crowley and Aziraphale.

Crowley recognises the system is corrupt and wants to leave it that way, to abandon it. And in some sense he's right. It can't be saved. But that's not a reason to always look the other way and run. Aziraphale meanwhile consistently denies it until he can't anymore. Time and time again he puts his faith in the system which could be the end of him. He's courageous and hopeful that he can save Heaven and fix the system even though the mission is in vain. Neither of them are in the right. One wants to fix the unfixable, the other wants to abandon the inevitable.

One has lost all his faith in the system, while the other refuses to let go of it. Aziraphale, determined to save Heaven, to save the Earth, to save Gabriel, to save Job's children nearly kills himself and hurts Crowley along the way. And Crowley, in his eagerness to escape and find happiness independently from the Earth, pushes Aziraphale away and nearly leaves the world to be destroyed. One goes too fast, and speed runs through life, while the other clings to memories and the past. Neither of them being in the present. Neither of them meeting in the middle.

Which is precisely why Armaggedon was stopped, not by the Good side, or the Bad side, but by a human. A human not exposed to this polarity, but who's seen both Good and Bad and is himself a mixture of both. Adam represents humanity in all its flaws and virtues and saves it in the end. While Heaven and Hell, so convinced in their own purpose and goal, so convinced in their own purity/wickedness lead to the destruction of the Earth.

Paralleling Aziraphales and Crowleys argument, both of them going to the extreme, and ending up breaking their relationship.

The entire point of having a demon that isn't even remotely evil, and having an angel that isn't completely without sin, is to show that going to the extreme is nigh impossible. No one can truly be good and no one can truly be evil. "When Heaven ends life on Earth, it'll be just as dead as if Hell ended it." Both Heaven and Hell so determined to win and defeating the other side, to prove their own righteousness or wickedness, because they believe Heaven and Hell can't coexist, only one must emerge as the victor, so determined that they end up destroying the entire world, meanwhile being no more virtuous or corrupt than the other side.

And on the same note, Heaven and Hell can't exist without the other. "You can't be truly good unless you have the opportunity to be truly wicked." Without Hell, Heaven loses its meaning, and vice versa. They need the existence of the other, which proves that going to the extreme is impossible and would only result in pain and suffering. They need each other to balance each other out, they need the middle ground, the gray area. Whether it be shades of light grey or dark grey.

Now connect that to Aziraphale and Crowley. It's no coincidence that they managed to stop the Apocalypse TOGETHER, both of them on each of Adam's shoulders, converging both good and bad, which they both hold in various shades, together. And only together could they hope to stop the Second Coming.

They "need each other." Aziraphale needs Crowley just as Crowley needs Aziraphale. "Cancel each other out." No... BALANCE each other out. It's no wonder Warlock grew up into a demon child who nearly killed everyone at his birthday party (the book) and trashed the entire place. Because Aziraphale and Crowley were going AGAINST each other, and it was driving Warlock wild. The boy couldn't possibly be truly virtuous or truly evil, so he ends up a mess. Aziraphale and Crowley were going to the extreme and created something that wrecks and destroys.

They need to work together. And my guess is that saving the world in season 3 entails them to bring Heaven and Hell together. To find the middle ground. "Heaven and Hell against humanity." Because if Heaven and Hell continue on like this, there would never be peace on Earth. Just as Crowley and Aziraphale have to come together to fix their relationship.

[postapocalyptic-cryptic]

Newt Geiszler NSFT Alphabet

A set of NSFT headcanons for Newt based on @the-coldest-goodbye's list! Written with @suborbitalrailgun looking over my shoulder and helping.

Notes: No trigger warnings, Newt is FTM trans, some Newt/Hermann details

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

After sex, Newt gets kind of hyper. He’s all fired up now and he wants to do something, not sit around and cuddle Usually, this means that he either gets up and does some aftercare stuff for Hermann like getting him food and water and something to clean himself up with, but it also means he brings a book or his phone to bed after so that he can cuddle Hermann without losing his mind with boredom

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Newt’s favorite part of his own body is his arms. They’re pretty well-muscled from working with heavy kaiju specimens, and of course there are the tattoos. He thinks the bracelets make his forearms look even better. His favorite part of Hermann’s body, besides everything, is his face. He just really loves looking at Hermann’s face.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Newt is one of those lucky transmasculine souls who was blessed by the testosterone gods with a hair trigger and a lot of stamina. It’s not unusual for him to come three or four times in a session, and Hermann is very jealous. That being said, he doesn’t get super wet, so lube is absolutely a must when it comes to penetration. You win some, you lose some, you know?

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He has, on at least one occasion, masturbated in the lab while Hermann was in there. Hermann didn’t know. Yes, Newt finished. E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) Newt tends to be one of those people who people like for one night stands. He’s cute and he’s got a lot of personality, but people find him annoying or too much after a few days, so he’s got a lot of experience with one-offs and short relationships. He was also kind of dedicated to Hermann by about year three of the letters, so that stuff tapered off. The apocalypse and subsequent containment to the Shatterdome didn’t help. All that being said, he has a decent amount of experience, but he’s not super talented at sex itself. He knows some generic things that work for everyone, but he hasn’t really spent a lot of time thinking about how he likes to have sex.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

When he’s topping, Newt likes doggy style. He wants to minimize the awkward eye contact and find a good angle and all that. When he’s bottoming, he prefers to be on his side. Something about that angle just really does it for him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Oh, he’s absolutely goofy before, during, and after. If you can’t tolerate a little laughter during sex, you’re not going to enjoy sex with Newt. He’s also going to listen to his music if he’s given the chance, so you might end up with some deeply unserious songs.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Newt generally doesn’t care about how he looks downstairs. If he’s going out or planning on having sex, he’ll trim everything a little bit, but he’s not a big shaving guy. Whatever happens down there happens.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

It depends entirely on the person! He can be really lovey and sweet, but usually he likes a light and/or sexy mood more than a serious or romantic one.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

This guy jacks off all the time. I’m serious. It’s not quite a daily thing, but it’s close. The apocalypse is nigh and he’s stressed, okay? Also, if you’ve never been on testosterone you don’t understand the urge to jack off like a transmasc on testosterone does

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Exhibitionism (see above dirty secret) Electrostimulation Masochism Restraints Spit (being spit on, etc.) Biting and being bitten

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Club bathrooms The lab (in his dreams) Bedroom

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Hermann Weed Being told off (by Hermann)

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Anything that could be seriously unsafe in a chemical way. He won’t fuck on his side of the lab. He knows too much about biology to fuck around with that Specific kinds of dirty talk Humiliation, being called annoying even in a joking way

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He likes giving it but he’s not necessarily good at it. Once he and Hermann are together for a while, he gets good through practice, though He does like receiving, and he’s likely to grab hair and push and all that.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Fast and rough, whether he’s giving or receiving. With him and Hermann, this is sometimes an issue, because Hermann has a hard time taking or giving that kind of force, but they work around it. Possibly, Newt builds some shit to work around it.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Newt is a quickie enthusiast because it lends itself to exhibitionism AND his short attention span. Make it feel good and get it over with. He’s not one for drawing things out.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Yeah! Especially when he’s first together with Hermann, they do a lot of experimenting.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

As mentioned before, he has great stamina in terms of how many times he can come, but less so when it comes to how long he actually wants to go for. Especially when he’s topping, he goes too fast and wears himself out quickly.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He has a pretty good collection of toys, some of which he’s made himself. They make solo sessions much more enjoyable, and when he and Hermann get together, they definitely see a lot of use

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He wants to tease, but he’s also an attention whore and an impatient little creature so he usually breaks first

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

There have been several noise complaints

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Newt actually doesn’t really like anything to do with his chest or nipples being touched. After top surgery, they’re not very sensitive in a sexual way, and the sensations he does get from them tend to be uncomfortable

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

A pretty nice t dick Size B-ish cups before top surgery A healthy amount of pudge

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Very

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Not for a few hours at least. He’s very wired after sex and probably wants to go do something else immediately afterward

[ronearoundblindly]

Oooh, can I get 4, 7, & 8 for RoaR, please??

I had a hard time choosing questions because that story is so incredibly well-developed that I felt like I already knew the answers to most of them. 👏👏👏

Questions from this ask game and for The Root of All Ransom series with Ransom Drysdale x rich!reader.

*I just want to preface this by saying RoAR Ran is an eternal work-in-progress. He will never magically become soft and cute all the time. He doesn't turn into a super-loving, sweet thing only around Reader but stay a grumpy asshole to everyone else. It's way more complicated than that.

4. Who initiates affection? Why does the other not initiate affection as much?

What we know from RoAR's story so far is that you and Ran are pretty evenly the instigators of sex, which is very different from affection in this case. Ran takes a long time to develop affection for anyone. Most people he hates, some people amuse him, even fewer people he tolerates, and there has been no one--not a single soul in the world--that he's ever loved...until you.

He shows affection in teeny, tiny ways. He remembers far more of your preferences and tastes than he learns for anyone else. It used to be that he remembered things for the purpose of fucking with people (like how he knew his mother would hate what he bought for her birthday and why he chose to dangle you and your Birkin in front of her). He still does that. It's a hard habit to break.

Ransom doesn't receive affection well either, and that's a similar, slow progression.

Even during sex, for those first months before Harlan's birthday party, Ran can't accept that there are moments that aren't about the sex anymore. Moments of connection get swept aside so he doesn't need to think about it. Kissing never means more than kissing...until it does.

Intimacy is scary to him, okay? You try not to spook him; he can't handle clingy unless it's a product of exhaustion. I believe it was in this ask that I eluded to him being nice during sleepy sex. Isolated and tired is the only time Ran has no walls up and no filter for his openness. He'll be needy and clingy, too. It's like a magic hour, just much shorter and easier to end early. That higher, self-conscious, self-preserving brain function kicks in very quickly.

Again. That's for the first few years. After that, he finally trusts the bedroom as a whole to be a safe zone.

7. How often do they say “I love you”?

Rarely the words. Since Ran is so...let's use the nice term 'guarded,' it's clear that even the smallest of gestures is a big deal for him, and that speaks louder than the words.

Has he done something that is more convenient for you than him? He must really fucking love you.

Has he gone out of his way to do something only you enjoy? Holy shit, Ransom Drysdale is in love.

Has he *gasp* not complained the whole evening? Sell all your stock! The apocalypse is nigh! Ran really, really fucking loves you.

You say "I love you" when it's absolutely crucial he hears it. Ran could so easily dismiss that sentiment if the phrase is overused. He won't believe the power of the words if he hears them for no reason all the time. If you say it for every little thing, then 'I love you' becomes a little thing.

8. What do they love most about the other? Why?

Though it might be subtle and hard-earned, Ransom's loyalty is FIERCE.

He can feel betrayed somewhat quickly (like being disinherited by Harlan), but Ran will fight tooth and nail for the very few people he trusts. He will die for you--either by sacrifice of his reputation or his life. It's endearing and quite possibly the most rewarding gift he could ever give you.

That's what you love the most about Ransom. Despite his best efforts to remain indifferent, he is completely and utterly devoted to you.

Ran, on the other hand...

He loves the crook of your neck.

Hold up! Hold up now! I said what I said, but hear me out!

Ransom is not close to people--anyone really--and does not allow people to get close either. Throughout this enemies-to-fuck-buddies-to-reluctant-lovers journey, he's had to let a lot of walls come down. Renovation's a bitch, ya know. Mentally and physically, it's a big fucking deal that he continues to see you, to sleep in the same bed as you, to call you and talk to you and listen the whole time. Ran is not accustomed to having to be present.

He can sleep in the crook of your neck. He can listen to you talk like there's no one else in the world. He can hear your heartbeat when you're quiet. He can hide because this is all really new for him. He can smell your skin and remind himself that it's okay to miss you when you aren't there. He can kiss there and mean everything all at once: "I'm horny," "you're sexy," "I love you," "I'm tired," "get off the fucking phone," "I don't want to get up," or "don't leave me."

The crook of your neck. That's Ran's new center of gravity.

Thank you for asking!

ope. i'm fine.

[haveyouseenthishorrormovie]

SUMMARY: A family vacation is interrupted by the arrival of four stranger claiming that the apocalypse is nigh - and that the family must make an unimaginable choice in order to avert it.

mod L says: as a fan of the book this movie is ostensibly based on, I can't spend too much time thinking about it, or I start crying blood.

mod Z has seen this and actually liked it a lot despite it not being the best movie out there

[emcandon]

I return from my bg3 stupor with a fresh 2 am question:

was the TAU story and world a concept you were baking for a long time until you had a chance to write it, or was it a more recent creation?

Do you find it easy or hard to build out new story concepts? Like, do you need to sit on them a while until they feel right, or does it just come pouring out of you from the start? Or a secret, third thing?

Just anything about your personal creation process!

lol hi it might not surprise you to learn that i am also steeping in bg3 (i am still stumbling around act 1! i'm not allowed to play until i hit daily sequel writing quota, which is healthy, i'm sure, but does mean i am somewhat behind just about everyone i know who is also playing :P)

(my first Tav is an enormous nb tiefling bard named Faretheewell who is, imo, perfect. very beautiful. very kind. definitely does drag. lying a lot, but mostly just for funsies. has turned astarion into their little purse dog.)

ANYWAY, TO THE ACTUAL QUESTION:

TAU's an interesting case because it was cannibalized from a couple different ongoing projects into something entirely new.

The characters had been floating around in different iterations since about 2013, and their final forms in Archive are quite distinct from the original seed! Imagine Sunai as an exiled diplomat who got involuntarily apprenticed to a cursed king/the last magician in the world; imagine Veyadi as a disowned god-child tasked with murdering the last magician! I'm still probably going to use that world somewhere so I'll mum about it now (it's the one I call "grandma heist.")

((imo that's why you should always yoink characters you like from whatever source you enjoy, be it your own or something else -- they will inevitably change in their new context, often so substantially that they are nigh unrecognizable.))

The story concept also originated in 2013: "Pacific Rim, but the mechs are built out of the kaiju, and pilots must have survived being poisoned by those kaiju." The addition of strange and upsetting AIs of divine power was somewhat inherited from the story Sunai and Adi came from, where divinity was fraught, fractured, and hungry.

Here's a funny. In 2017 I thought TAU would be a nice, simple, clean project. However. I know some folks who turn out gloriously clean first drafts. I AM NOT ONE OF THEM. My brain is a hazardous work environment, very non-OSHA compliant. Basically I do a lot of thought work in the drafting, so the drafts are consequently messy, and there are a LOT of changes from concept to actual workable manuscript.

Which I suppose is to say that story concepts nest in my brain quite often when it is healthy. The frequency with which I land on new and interesting story thoughts is actually a pretty good indicator of how well I am doing ambiently! Right now I'm storing up a lot of them, some of which I am fairly rabid about -- nearly as rabid as I am about Archive, which is the real indicator of a project that is ready to transition from Thought to Work. They are described here as "apocalypse magicians" and other such things. There's one that's going to be kind of an argument with Lovecraftian unknowability via desconstruction of Enlightenment epistemologies + queer identity destruction, and another that's going to be the Le Carré approach to espionage + magic as divinity meets public service + interplanetary empires intruding on your bumfuck planet offering the solution to climate change might still be bad actually. (I want to write that last with my wife and we are making SUCH GOOD FUCKING SHIPS FOR IT.)

How to summarize this? 1) find a story notion/concept about which i can obsess, 2) actually start writing it, 3) mess up spectacularly for a few drafts, 4) finally whittle together something more or less correct, 5) that's my editor's problem now!!

[king-of-wrath]

Ramon: ⚡️During your earliest years in Hell, which overlord was considered to be the most vile demon to the point they had to be overthrown?

"During my second century in Hell, there was not just one tyrant that needed to fall," Ramon shook his head. "There were eight."

"'The Covenant of Blood and Bone', they called themselves---though many would call them 'Blood Knights'. Murderers, mutilators, marauders, madmen and malefactors flocked to their ranks, eager to satisfy their nigh-insatiable lust for blood."

"It began as an apocalypse cult, but whether it began on Earth or in Hell, I do not know. They praised the Wrath-King's name and offered sacrifices to Him in hopes that they would rule at His side, come the End of Days. But from their ranks, eight butchers of men would rise---drawing His gaze upon them."

"Some unholy pact was made, compelling them to even greater heights of barbarism: they slaughtered whole communes, leaving nothing but streams of blood and icons of bone. Others were even less fortunate, being flayed and crucified upside-down, dragged along by barbed chains or painted with the gore of their loved ones---their skulls hanging on necklaces and belts."

"This would not stand. So profane were these perversions that even the most bitter of enemies banded together, swearing to shatter this bloody covenant and marching together in lock-step. But the eight had far worse monsters than mere cultists at their disposal..."

"Barely-tamed beasts and feral Hellborn were unleashed upon us, turning the ashen plains into a quagmire of slick gore---the sheer stench of which drew more into the melee. Such was the bloodshed that Wrath Himself parted volcanic smog to observe the carnage from high above."

"Sensing His eyes upon them, the eight fell into a savage frenzy. They and their minions then hacked and cleaved anything in reach, desperate to prove themselves the greatest of them all. 'Blood', they sang like a dark chorus, shaking the ground with stomps of their gore-stained boots. 'Blood'. 'Blood'. 'Blood'. Each kill only seemed to strengthen them, felling beasts and shattering lines with single strikes. 'Blood'. 'Blood'. 'Blood'."

"Freeing my mace from the greymatter of some deformed beast, I turned and stared one down. 'Blood', he pointed at me. 'Blood', he gripped his axe. 'Blood', he began to charge. 'Blood', he chanted unceasingly---even as I crumpled his chestplate, crunching his ribs behind it. 'Blood', he spat through the grate of his helmet."

"Wrath's presence must have affected me, too. I ignored my own wounds, fighting like a man possessed. He threw out his fist, sending me flying back with a tumble. 'Blood', he growled as he towered over me with axe raised high."

"'THEN SATAN WILL HAVE YOURS!', I shouted back and swung with all my strength---breaking his leg, felling him like a tree at the cost of shattering my mace's head."

"He dropped his axe, needing both arms to push himself up from the blood. Perhaps it would be fitting for him to die so ingloriously, drowning in the shin-deep pool of that which he craved. Ironic, even. But I would not allow this. I wanted to make an example of him. I wanted to defy Satan Himself, holding the head of His would-be champion."

"So as this knight struggled to remove his helmet, having slipped and fallen back into the crimson muck, I raised his weapon and brought it down upon that exposed neck. I unfastened the strap he could not grip---so wet were his armored fingers---and pulled the head out by the hair."

"Perhaps I was still afflicted by Wrath's power. Perhaps I was only being cocky. But I did what I wanted: I lifted both my head and his to the sky, staring back into His four flaming eyes."

"To this day, I am puzzled as to why He did not strike me down. He did not react in any way I would have thought. No, he instead laughed and went away."

[mochalottie]

What is this?? A chapter posted at a reasonable time by me?? The apocalypse must be nigh, quick grab your sandwich boards!!

Also, a very happy fathers day! Consider this my own celebration because my own dad can't be here with me to celebrate. The chapter is very aptly centred in Jake's POV so enjoy having our knucklehead stride (read stumble) through life for 12k words.

Anyway, ta ta for now lovelies <333

[zmediaoutlet]

what is your stance on the "amelia or at least sams life with her was only a hallucination his already damaged psyche conjured up after suffering a psychotic break"-theory?

umm not a fan. Like... not for me, at all. But the way I'm not a fan has evolved a little over the years, haha, so to expand --

I get why people are into it. I mean, the filming choices are so batshit weird (why that gross golden vaseline filter? why drop in flashbacks every time Jared looked constipated in the main timeline?) that it's easy to go It Was All A Dream, no matter how cheesy that is.

Goof-ass cinematography aside, though, I know the reason a lot of people want to reject it out of hand is that "Sam would have looked for Dean." I get it; it's tough that he didn't. But there's a difference between Sam should have looked and Sam necessarily must have, and the fact that he didn't is so OOC we have to invent a full on AU for him. I mean, for one thing, the actual canon information as presented doesn't contravene the idea that Sam did actually try but failed, and gave up* after failing. He was alone with a busted car, zero help (Bobby dead, angels not listening, demons not answering the phone, etc), and had no idea if Dean was dead or just winked from existence (because why would he assume that he went to Purgatory?). With zero leads and dead ends at every turn, it's very easy to insert like a month of him failing and then he hits a dog -- and then, because he feels intensely guilty, telling Dean that he didn't really try, because his efforts were so paltry that he can't even count them as trying.

...but even that isn't really that much of an argument. One thing that I find happens a lot with the Winchesters in fandom discussions, but especially with Sam, is like... not allowing them the dignity of their choices. Which -- like, duh, they're fictional characters, they're written a certain way. But there's a real tendency to leap to OOC claims or "the writers don't know what they're doing!!" whenever it's something we wish the character wouldn't have done because we don't like it. But like... that's not how characters work. Characters do shit I don't like all the time; it doesn't mean they didn't do it, and that I shouldn't try to fold even that disliked thing into my conception of who the character is. (Important caveat: there's a great post by astolat that talks about the venn diagrams of audience belief and canonicity in texts with multiple writers that makes this more complicated. Still, I think that variability comes in small details as she mentions in that post, or indeed dumb little moments of Jensen improv in spn canon, rather than whole-ass plot arc decisions.)

Sam stopped looking for/didn't look for Dean when he disappeared. That's interesting. Kinda sucks, and the show and Sam himself point out multiple times that it kinda sucks, but that doesn't make it uninteresting or OOC, especially given the Sam we have who is nigh indomitable. The fact that it was his choice speaks to a Sam who's really just... beaten down. And why wouldn't he be? Slings and arrows from birth all the way to age 27 when he threw himself into the worse torture imaginable -- then he got saved, hallegoddamnlujah, and he thought maybe he'd be there with Dean, living a life he could choose for once instead of one he'd been forced into by destiny -- and then it was just another apocalypse, and enemies on all sides, and every friend and ally and hope just torn away, one by one. It's a miracle he got to keep the car. I can see that Sam, in that last torn circumstance, just -- going into hiding. He hits a dog and then inertia keeps him in one place, spinning his wheels. He meets a girl and she kinda sucks but she's prickly and rude and not-samey enough to prod him back up into life, and at that point it's been months and Dean's gone and he thinks, if this is life I guess I can live it. He can't go back to the shell of a life he loved with Dean and it's just... too much. He's always been very, very good at putting one foot in front of the other. (It's why he manages to live after the finale.)

Now, does Sam regret that choice, such as it was? Sure. (Not that I think he could've changed anything about it.) Doesn't mean he didn't make it. It also beautifully informs the arc of that year, moving from one choice to another -- from abdicating responsibility to taking on the ultimate responsibility. And it's really really REALLY interesting to me in the long-form story spn tells about Sam and the Most Interesting Long-form Character Development Ever. He's a startling advocate for his own agency and holds it in tight reins; I'm not interested in pretending he isn't, either for Martyr!Sam headcanons or any strong weird wincest-only stanning. Plus, Amelia-the-mistress as parallel for Benny-the-mistress is just too good to give up.

s8's awesome. It doesn't need weird St. Elsewhere headcanons to make it somehow excusable.

[linuxgamenews]

Meg’s Monster gets ready to release adventure and test you

Meg’s Monster retro turn-based JRPG game on Linux, Mac, and Windows PC soon. Thanks to the epic minds beind developer Odencat. Which is all due to make its way onto Steam. Japan indie publisher / developer Odencat Inc. is gearing up to release their epic, stylized, retro turn-based JRPG game. Which is also creating ripples in its homeland, which is due in the West on March 2nd, 2023. Meg’s Monster is coming to both Linux and Steam Deck. Which has also been in development for the last two years. So now, the final touches are being completed to make this one of Odencat Inc’s most ambitious releases. Which is due to include multi-language options. Coming after successful releases including Bear's Restaurant. Along with amazing community support and anticipation for the game. Meg’s Monster chronicles the story of two very unlikely friends. While encased in a unique, raw, scripted, turn-based battle system. Where the player controls a nigh invincible monster who must defeat enemies. Doing so while protecting a fragile human child with strange apocalyptic powers. Because if she cries, the whole world dies. Meg, the human child, (whose tears just so happen to hold the power to bring forth the apocalypse) winds up in a world full of mutants and monsters. They also eat humans for breakfast. It’s up to a hulking brute named Roy and his pal Golan to help her make it back home. While they scour the Underworld for clues regarding her mother’s location. So the trio slowly warm up to one another. While also uncovering some truly amazing secrets about their world and themselves.

Meg’s Monster Teaser Trailer

Meg’s Monster’s retro style and simple in presentation quickly unfolds into a challenging, amusing, and must-play RPG. The story quickly pulls the player into the story while at the same time giving a real empathy for the characters. Over 50,000 words of dialogue give a rich and compelling story to the many battles coming as you venture forth. Each battle comes with its own unique mechanics and minigames to master. So you can duke it out while protecting and keeping Meg happy with her favourite toys. Yes, keeping Meg calm and happy is just one underlying factor. A nice toy will achieve this. But it’s not that simple in Meg’s Monster. Roy, the monster, has 99999 HP and is almost invincible (as in almost every enemy can’t kill him; think Saitama from One Punch Man). However, when he takes damage, the other protagonist, Meg, takes emotional and mental damage in Meg’s Monster. Since she is a child and can’t bear to see Roy getting hurt. If her mental gauge reaches zero, she’ll cry and the world ends. This means that players will need to balance Meg’s mood, as well as defeating enemies that want to destroy them. Roy will need to use toys to keep Meg happy and prevent her from crying. The Demo for Linux, Mac, and Windows PC is available on Steam. Should you want to test your skill at keeping Meg calm. Also, famed Monster Hunter, Hi-Fi Rush, and Atelier Ryza 2 composer Reo Uratani, and a main theme featuring ethereal, otherworldly lyrics written and performed by Laura Shigihara of Plants vs Zombies™, To the Moon, Rakuen, and Deltarune fame, Meg’s Monster soundtrack has much to offer. Meg’s Monster retro turn-based JRPG game will be live on Steam, March 2nd, 2023. Priced at $14.99 USD / £10.99 / 13,99€. Along with support for Linux, Steam Deck, Mac, and Windows PC.

[iknaenmal]

By to funk I think about Gielgud arthound a lot. He had an all ice mom who stopped being alive and then he me his nephew because he was a,nary and he went and eaten the abppple and turned into work which ma FR a beg to back in turn to tell a 12 yea 4old Lou Gehrig stan with shoes too kill a man who kill so he destroyed the stray dog pouletion in 33kismoleter raids and a mob set mgave him the key to the ant who he killed to get a sound beat the animals to death end he went and killed the secret fifth member of the blue Cman group and saved a text bar from his prison and also Palma. So they stopped a zombie apocalypse but it Zion tr work so me.Glasses has to save them from the floor. So the nes and Jeff and Paul ago to the . Saturn Valley, home of Mr. Saturn, Mr. Saturn, Mr. Saturn, Mr. Saturn, Mr. Saturn, Mr. Saturn, Mr. Saturn (I looked it up and Saturn Valley has a population of 5297 so I can’t finish this joke), who tell them how to get to the base behind Grapefruit Falls, home of Master Belch, a sentient pile of vomit. Theydefft mater bel boys anYou've traveled very far from home... Do you remember how your long and winding journey began with someone pounding at your door? It was Pokey, the worst person in your neighborhood, who knocked on the door that fateful night. On your way, you have walked, thought and fought. Yet through all this, you have never lost your courage. You have grown steadily stronger, though you have experienced the pain of battle many times. You are no longer alone in your adventure. Paula who is steadfast, kind and even pretty, is always at your side. Jeff is with you as well. Though he is timid, he came from a distant land to help you. Ness, as you certainly know by now, you are not a regular young man... You have an awesome destiny to fulfill. The journey from this point will be long, and it will be more difficult than anything you have undergone to this point. Yet, I know you will be all right. When good battles evil, which side do you believe wins? Do you have faith that good is triumphant? One thing you must never lose is courage. If you believe in the goal you are striving for, you will be courageous. There are many difficult times ahead, but you must keep your sense of humor, work through the tough situations and enjoy yourself. When you have finished this cup of coffee, your adventure will begin again. Next you must pass though a vast desert and proceed to the big city of Fourside. Ness... Paula... Jeff... I wish you luck...d drink coffe who tells them thayou’ve travelled very farm from home… Do you remember how your long and winding journey be so with someone pounding and you for? It was pkwy, the worst person in your neighborhood,who knocke don thr door that date fit. Nigh,On your way, you have walked, flaked, and taught. Yet through all of this, you have never lost your courage, you have grown steadily dronter, youth you have experienced the painf of battle many times. You ar enolonger alone in your adventure.Paula, who is steadfast,kind and even pretty, is with you at your side. Jeff is with you as well. Ess, as you certainly know by now, you e not a return young man..you have an awesome Destiny to fulfill. The journey from this point will be long, and it will be more difficult firm anything you have undergone to this point, yet, I know you will be all right. When good battlesnefik, who ch side do you th8nk winds? Do you have faith that food is trumpants? One thing you must neve t lose is courage, if you ebele8ve in the coal that you are striving for, you will Ben orageous. There are many difficult times ages, but yiu mucht keep your sent of humor, workmdtough thr tough seturuts, an emoji ydiurself. When you have finishedthis cup of coffee, you’re efrteree will bejli. Agin. Next you fist mass throug a voter desert and proceed to the big city of four side, Ness, Pauak, Jed, I wisunyiulu come… so they drink milk and heAd to the desert but the American transport system is so bad that the roads dis clogged so they have to ,get eats

ironed I don’t emended what happens in four side but they eat a banana to sign, go to diamonds and gold and kill the third strongest mole, an find classes lenses, then they kill a rat, Paul gets kidnapped by a POSER and they smoke weed to kills d eom. They then go ro I don’t ache,my remember after that but at some point they all live in a yellow submarine. I think there was Oh I remember so they have to go to summer and do more eeed to get poo They go to winter and the. Toto to meet scarab. They steal a o rice,ess artifact to see crystal and beet bungeon ban. HIn the town where I was born Lived a man who sailed to sea And he told us of his life In the land of submarines So we sailed on to the sun 'Til we found a sea of green And we lived beneath the waves In our yellow submarine

We all live in a yellow submarine Yellow submarine, yellow submarine We all live in a yellow submarine Yellow submarine, yellow submarine

And our friends are all aboard Many more of them live next door And the band begins to play

We all live in a yellow submarine Yellow submarine, yellow submarine We all live in a yellow submarine Yellow submarine, yellow submarine

Full steam ahead, Mister Boatswain, full steam ahead Full steam ahead it is, Sergeant (Cut the cable, drop the cable) Aye-aye, sir, aye-aye Captain, captain

As we live a life of ease (a life of ease) Every one of us (every one of us) Has all we need (has all we need) Sky of blue (sky of blue) And sea of green (sea of green) In our yellow (in our yellow) Submarine (submarine, aha)

We all live in a yellow submarine A yellow submarine, yellow submarine We all live in a yellow submarine A yellow submarine, yellow submarine We all live in a yellow submarine Yellow submarine, yellow submarine We all live in a yellow submarine Yellow submarine, yellow submarine they visit shy people and have to kill more robots and tentacles. They rescue frien from shyness so they can meet dinosaurs and kill a dog made of fire. Ness then gets absolutely lost in the sauce and kills the kraken and hiss evil sk they can go kill more robots. They go to Saturn valley to kill a swirl and porky runs away. [REDACTED] and they gieguas dies. Al, that because nobody gave Giegue a hug

Sent from my iPhone

i will think about this for the rest of my life

[piratesofhyrule]

The Story That Will Never Be Told 3: The Divine Beast (TOTK spoiler)

By popular vote, up next is the story behind Draconic Zelda. This one was pretty new compared to just about everything else as it's only because of TOTK that this even exists.

Now finding out about Zelda-Dragon didn't necessarily derail anything I had already planned, but it warranted interest and investigation. Finding out how such a cool concept couldn't be afforded a suitably emotionally charged telling and consequence thereof, I immediately decided "okay, if Nintendo won't give Zelda a dragon form with a compelling narrative and emotional payoff, then I will!"

Same thought process behind giving her a big-titty goth gf but I digress

So researching into it, found out that how Zelda even becomes a dragon was pretty contrived and stupid with no heart or compelling emotions, even after she turns back. In a moment of inspiration thanks to @ladyicepaw I figured out how to shoehorn include the concept of Draconic Zelda!

Now in my continuity's history, every Zelda has had the power to ascend to a Divine Beast. However, the circumstances required for this are INCREDIBLY specific, they lose all control over themselves and there's no guarantee they turn back afterwards (some did, but those were so far and few in between that there's no record of how they did so). The previous Zelda, the Ghost Queen, actually died after her ascension into the Divine Beast, hence she warns the current Zelda (pirate barbarian) that "you can do it, but it will cost far more then you are willing to sacrifice"

To summon the Divine Beast, it's only when there's enough people across the whole world hoping and praying for divine intervention in the face of a dreaded calamity. So many voices have to cry out in one voice, all asking for the same thing in the throes of desperation for the stage to be set. And this typically only happens during an apocalyptic event and everyone's at risk of dying horribly. But in these bleak moments, "every heart upon the earth, sea and sky beats as one, every voice cries out as one, all asking for the same thing; deliverence"

These rare moments create what's essentially a gestalt field of worship-fuelled energy that only those chosen by the divine can tap into. This is a power source that exceeds just about anything else, but only forms when every single person on the entire planet is praying for the same thing. And given these moments typically only happen when "the end is nigh", everyone's praying that something saves them from the apocalypse so these energies reach a fever pitch.

Because Zeldas all serve their kingdoms through the ages, they are able to hear these prayers and hopes. The fact these are all focused towards "save us from [insert world-ending event]", that is why the Ganons cannot use these and while the Links possibly could, none have. During the times that the Divine Beast appears, "it's only when hope is bleakest and faith is sundered at the end of all things that Hylia's Divine Beast shall stir. Her daughters who bind themselves in full to a spark of the Divine shall awaken the Dragon that will deliver the world from oblivion."

Now the fact the necessary energies are generated by an entire planet all hoping for the same thing is also the reason for the cost of ascension. The Divine Beast is the epitome of the world's final prayers, it acts in accordance with the dying wish of the world. Ergo, the few times it appears it always helps save the world from doom, but the Zelda who ascends to it is but one of the millions of thoughts that direct the Dragon. She must willingly sacrifice herself to this gestalt conciousness, knowing that she will probably never return from it but willing to do whatever it takes to save the world.

Hence why although the Dragon has appeared several times in the ancient past, only four of the dozens of Zeldas who brought it forth have ever returned afterwards

Now in addition to the fact this requires a whole planet hoping for the same thing, the Zelda must also be holding a piece of divinity to catalyze the process. Thus far, they've been able to use the Wisdom Triforce, but the Barbarian Pirate one actually gives up her Triforce to Sheik as she has an alternative piece of divinty; The Heart of Hylia. Although the Heart is knocked overboard as The End arises, Zelda dives into the sea

And from the ocean, Hylia's Divine Beast arises to stop the Blood Moon's fall

[dendro-dragon-apep]

💤

When you live long enough to be considered ancient, dreams rarely tend to appear after years of suppression and practiced control over one's subconscious.

...at least, that is what Apep would claim. That they were below such transient things like dreams.

Apep knew damn well that she was fooling nobody. Even with the apocalypse raging through her body, they still dreamed. Their entire being was held together by this dream, their children crying out as they were shattered within their mother's world.

And now that her children have found peace and the tumor of Abyssal Knowledge had been purged, Apep noticed that she had begun to dream of more... Personal things.

-

Two hatchlings were running in a field, one verdant and one vermilion. The two seemed to be playing a game of chase while under the warm sun.

"No fair! Big brother has wings to fly, and keeps taunting me with it! I demand a rematch!" The green hued one hissed, much to the amusement of the red dragon.

"Well, that's cause I'm the Flamelord! I will one day command the flames like our Dam and soar the skies wreathed in fire!" he guffawed.

"But that's no fair! I took after our Sire, and was not gifted the ability to fly like you...," a younger Apep sulked. The red dragon faltered slightly, landing gently onto the lush field of flowers to be face to face with his sibling.

"Apep, don't be upset! It just means that in the future, I will simply carry you on my back when I grow as big as Dam and Sire! So don't be jealous, dear sister. After all, we are brethren, and destined to be the greatest Sovereigns of Pyro and Dendro. We'll make the world flourish with abundance, and make sure every living being will never go hungry again!"

"Xiuhcoatl, is that a promise?"

"Obviously!"

Oh, my brother by bond and blood. Always so eager and passionate with his ideals and promises. Can't you see how much you burn? Can't you see how you walk upon the path that leads to your own destruction?

Can't you see how naive you have become?

-

The dream began to warp. The skies bled black and red, and the stars began to dim as shattered pieces of the moon adorned the heavens. The hatchlings were no longer small, instead now there were two Sovereigns. And before them both stood Nibelung, talons folded neatly in front of Him as he gazed into the distance.

"-too many casualties. My king, we need to come to an agreement. Apep's territory is nothing but sand and dust, and many have retreated to the corrupting isles beneath the soil to escape this slaughter," the Pyro Sovereign argued, knowing that his appeals fell upon deaf ears.

"Xiuhcoatl, are you suggesting we surrender? That we simply roll over and let these intruders take what is ours!? This is a war we must win at any cost!"

The roar of Nibelung caused the Sovereign of Pyro and Dendro to flinch. Xiuhcoatl looked towards his little sister, silently pleading for them to support him.

Apep stood silently, daring not to look her brother in the eye. "My territory is nothing but hostile and unviable. The Divine Nail had made it nigh impossible for anything substantial to grow. This isn't some war where negotiations will ever be made. This is the annihilation of our people. Yes, sacrifices must be made, but that is so we can survive to see the next sunrise."

Apep had sounded cold and hollow that day. The Sovereign lost everything she had built, everything that she made as their legacy.

"Apep, please, be reasonable-"

"You expect me to bow before the whims of our killers!? Xiuhcoatl, those false gods, those wretched spawn of the Usurper, they will destroy and take everything! At this point, your suggestion is as good as saying we kill ourselves!"

The Pyro Sovereign quieted, the harsh truth of Apep's words causing him to falter. "Xiuhcoatl, your heart bleeds too much for others. You have to understand some promises cannot be fulfilled. It's a fool's endeavor, and if you cannot agree, your silence is preferable than your stupid nonsense."

-

A letter written, read, and held in desperation one clear night. A fire slowly extinguishing as a once emerald scaled serpent ran outside.

"XIUHCOATL! WHERE ARE YOU? XIUHCOATL!?"

-

Apep was met by a mass of charred remains, Abyssal Rot already making the corpse unrecognizable. "No. No, no, no."

A single scale, unblemished and stuck deep into the ground confirmed Apep's fears.

Xiuhcoatl had killed himself. And it was all their fault.

.

.

.

Apep finally awoke, knowing that the dream they had was a memory. Sighing, they sat up. "...foolish. he would be laughing if he saw me now," they grumbled, looking out the window as sunlight creeped into their home in Sumeru City. The chatter of students and merchants hawking their wares gave the scene a more vibrant and lively tone, one that made Apep's hardened heart soften ever so slightly.

"...but I am beginning to understand why you loved humanity. I hope wherever you are now, you are happy that your silly promise remains upheld."