#the amount of people who have never seen a caterpillar who came out of the woodwork this update is insane

[eideticmemory]

TWO GHOSTS IV | MATTHEW GUBLER

It’s been 15 years. 15 years has to be long enough . . . right? Read PART 3.

Set 15 years after the end of Ever Since New York, so give that a read first!

Word Count: 3.9k.

Warning: Usual angst, porn, and poor communication amongst characters.

SOUNDTRACK:

Love Affair - UMI

Debt - Eliza McLamb

Sometimes Sunshine - Seasalt

A nonstop flight, from New York City to Los Angeles, is three hours long. On a good day. And May 16 was supposed to be a good day. A great day. The best day of Matthew’s life. He tries not to think about it, not to reminisce too often. About the way he walked through the airport with a little jog, a little pep in his step. And the way he smiled through security, and constantly checked behind him as if you would magically appear. The roses he bought for you in a gift shop near the terminal.

See, a nonstop flight from New York City to Los Angeles is three hours long. On a good day. But Matthew wasn’t looking for three hours. He wasn’t asking you for a few hours of your time, or even a good day. He was asking you for a lifetime.

And that day, he had booked you two a connecting flight that totaled over six hours, with a two hour layover in Colorado. There was a little ice cream shop in the Denver airport, and they served blueberry ice cream. Matthew remembered it was your favorite, and saved just enough money to get your tickets and an entire pint. He couldn’t shake the thought of flying across the country with you, seeing a few small parts of it at a time. A few small parts at a time, until someday, you two had seen the whole world together.

He bought a blanket for you and, while waiting at the terminal, he sat it in the seat beside him, keeping it warm for when you would arrive. He had a little itinerary written in his notes app, and so far everything was going to plan. He had a bouquet of roses in his lap, and he killed time by looking up engagement rings online.

He didn’t start to worry until maybe, an hour, an hour and a half before the plane was set to depart. He called you, just to check in, and it went straight to voicemail. But he was still hopeful. There was very little that could destroy his peace that day. His hope. His happiness.

He tries not to think about it. The way the seconds inched by like a caterpillar moving across the limb of a tree. Slowly, painfully. The way his hope dwindled, and dwindled, and the insane amount of times he heard,

Hey, it’s [y/n]! Leave a message!

He can’t think about it anymore. The way he spents those six hours alone. Bawling his way through flight after flight, and eating a pint of blueberry ice cream by himself. He spent hours on his own. And weeks, months, hell, he spent years thinking that maybe, just maybe, you would find your way back to him.That the universe would magically correct itself.

And you’d come home.

Fifteen.

It took him fifteen years to find you again. It took fifteen years for the universe to bring you back together, and Matthew spent the first five thinking it was all some really shitty nightmare. It took him fifteen years to get close to you, to hear you say his name again, to get inside of you again.

And he managed to fuck it all up in a matter of twenty-four hours.

His body is paralyzed. His mind is moving a mile a minute, and he can’t take his eyes off the ceiling. His chest feels tight, like he can’t breathe properly. He knows he should not feel sorry for himself. That he, alone, is responsible for this wreck. But he can’t seem to shake it. He can’t seem to move.

“What the hell did I do?”

A knock at your door wakes you up. You don’t remember falling asleep, you don’t know how you were able to. But now, it’s all you want to do. You want to stay in the bed, in a state of unconsciousness and dreariness where you can’t remember your mistakes. But someone is knocking. Incessantly, loudly. And they won’t stop.

You roll out of bed, and drag your body across the floor. Zombie like, your shoulders are slouched, your eyes are hooded. Your feet shuffle along the floor like they’re weighted to the hardwood. Your footsteps are slow, hesitant. You don’t know what you’ll do if Matthew is on the other side of that door. You just . . . you don’t know. The very thought of it is making your stomach churn, and you suddenly feel very, very nauseous. The banging continues, and it’s as someone is using all their force. Like they’d break the door down if they could.

“[y/n]!”

You instantly relax at the sound of her voice. You speed up, hurry to the door, “[y/n] [y/l/n]! I know you can hear me! Open up!”

The door swings open and you catch her with her fist in the air, ready to strike the door once again. She’s pissed, doesn’t try to hide it, couldn’t hide it even if she tried.

“Good morning,” you rasp.

“It’s one in the afternoon,” she corrects you, pushing her way into your home.

“Please,” you say, shutting the door behind her. “Come on in.”

“Y’know,” Everest starts, clasping her hands in front of her as a wild look graces her face. “You’ve always been one of the good ones . . . hell, you’ve been . . . great, if that’s the word. You’re better than the others. The ones that really write my checks. But, um, you’re testing me, [y/n].”

You don’t even have to ask.

“Now, if there’s is some magical relationship blooming, or a monumental disaster about to strike, then you need to tell me now, so I can fix it. I’m a fixer, you know, that’s what I do. So, why are you making this so hard for me?”

“If it . . .” you clear your throat, cross your arms as you stare at her feet. “If it makes you feel any better, um, this is hard for me, too.” You attempt to joke. But you just sound sad.

“Yeah?” she raises her eyebrows. “So hard that you come out of his hotel in tears? And what the hell were you doing over there anyway? Was there a plan? Did he call you to come over?”

“I don’t see how any of this matters.”

“It matters because I woke up at seven in the morning — on a saturday — to all sorts of choas and speculation, and picture evidence of you doing exactly what I told you not to do!”

“Yeah, well, I’m a idiot. Don’t worry, that’s been established.”

“The internet is undefeated. Okay? People are . . . great at making up stories, making assumptions. And as your publicist, I need to know the whole story, the real story, before it gets twisted even further.”

You sigh, and walk over to the couch. As you sit down, you pull a pillow into your lap for just a little bit of comfort. “What do you mean the whole story?”

“Wrong choice of words,” Everest says. “The important parts of the whole story. Like are you dating him? Are you fucking him? If so, how long has this been going on?”

You can’t make eye contact as you speak, “I . . . fucked . . . him . . . a few times, a long time ago . . .”

She nods. She motions at you to continue, “. . . And?”

“And . . .” you breathe out. “I fucked him, again. Recently.”

“Last night? At the hotel?”

“Last night . . . not at the hotel.”

“Sooo, when? — Oh, my God,” she lowers her eyebrows at you, purses her lips. “You didn’t.”

“Oh, I did,” you nod. It’s a shameful nod. “You know they say there’s no sex like sex in a dressing room.”

“They also say polka dots are making a comeback, you believe everything you hear?”

“Sorry.”

“So you fuck him in the dressing room, and?”

“And . . . we go our seperate ways . . . again. And, then I realize that’s a lot easier said then done, so I . . . I go for him. I go for him . . .” Everest can hear the way your voice is cracking, the way the weight on your shoulder is slowly pushing the air out of your lungs. “And, uh,” you clear your throat. “Yeah. Yeah, it didn’t work out. Hence the . . . photos of me crying, I guess.”

“Mm,” she nods, crosses her arms. “And the other girl?”

You freeze, cut your head up at her. “What other girl?”

“What do you mean? The girls that came out right behind you. Same sad face? Kinda got a Natalie Portman look to her?”

“I . . .” you shake your head. “I didn’t know she came out after me, I must have left by then.”

“Who is she?”

You give her a shrug, “I don’t know.”

“His girlfriend?”

You huff, “Guess so.”

“Ah, so, some people online actually got it right. Huh, look at that.”

“Look, if the point of all of this is to keep me away from him, you can stop now. I don’t plan on seeing him ever again.”

The doorbell rings, as if on queue, and Everest instantly gives you a look. “What?” you ask. “I don’t know who it is. Your guess is as good as mine.”

She scoffs at you, and turns around, marching towards the door with a certain determination. She pulls it open, and immediately puts her hand on her hip. “You gotta be fucking kidding me.”

“Oh,” Matthew gasps. “Uh, oh . . . fuck . . . sorry, I must — I must have the wrong house.”

“You sure do, Romeo.”

You stand from the couch, your face laced with shock and anger and confusion, “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“Don’t engage, [y/n], what the hell?” Everest interjects.

You roll your eyes and cross your arms over your chest. “How the hell did you find my house?” you direct at Matthew.

“Oh, what?” he scoffs. “Like you’re the only one around here who can play stalker?”

“Go home, Matthew.”

“Five minutes. I’m asking you for five minutes. You can time me if you want.”

“Go back to California, Matthew.”

“Look, I know I fucked up. I know, but —“

“Do you?” you snap. You take slow, calculated steps towards the front door, and your voice is lowering to a rumble. “Do you know that you fucked up? Because, if you did, if you truly knew just how badly you fucked up, then you would leave. You would get on a fucking plane and leave, and you would never come back!”

The way Matthew is looking at you right now.Like he can’t fathom what’s happening. Like he is trying his very best not to feel defeated. “Can I . . . can I just —“

“No.” Everest says. “You heard her. Fuck off, string bean.”

You walk away, retiring to your kitchen. You try to keep yourself busy, but you’re trembling like mad and you can barely breathe.

Matthew leaves. You know because you hear the door close. Everest comes into the kitchen, and you feel stuck. Frozen to the spot and position you’re in. Your back is to her, and you can’t begin to imagine or guess what look is on her face right now.

She’s quiet for a moment, eyeing you with her arms crossed at her chest. She leans against the entryway and sighs, “Tell me more.”

Ramona walks up your driveway, and it isn’t until she looks up from her phone that she sees Matthew. She notices him, and he notices her, and Ramona tries to act like it didn’t happen, But when Matthew opens his mouth to speak, she blows past him, “I’m not supposed to talk to you.”

“I know,” he says instantly. He is well aware, but it doesn’t stop him from running in front of her, blocking her from your front door. “I know, I know. I’m sorry, but . . . please, can you give this [y/n]?”

Matthew holds out an envelope. It’s bright red, your name is printed on the front of it in his handwriting.

Ramona glances at it, but she quickly glances back up, “Do I look like a mailman to you?”

“She won’t take it from me. She won’t talk to me. She might take it from you.”

“Yeah, or she might fire me for even taking it from you in the first place.”

“[y/n] wouldn’t do that.”

“Yeah, yeah, she’s usually pretty amazing, except for when you’re around, or when you’re brought up, or when you’re fucking with her head. You make her a different person, dude. I want no part of it.”

He nods, looks down, “Fair enough . . . I’ll put it in her mailbox.”

“Yeah, why don’t you do that?” She shrugs, and she continues on by him.

“Damn . . .” Everest says. “You ghosted the guy at the airport?”

“Basically,” you shrug.

“Well, fuck,” she scoffs. “That is some serious great gatsby shit.”

“Yeah, we’ve always had a flair for the dramatic.”

The doorbell rings, and you both turn your heads sharply towards the entrance. “You don’t think he would come back, do you?” Everest asks as she walks to the door.

“Well, he never listens much to anything I say, but he’s probably a little scared of you.”

She laughs, and when she opens the door, she tells you it’s only Ramona, who walks in quickly, looking for you. She gives you a soft smile, and joins you in the kitchen as Everest follows close behind.

“So,” Ramona pips. “What’s the game plan?”

“You and [y/n] come to my office in the city and we’ll figure it out. Hey, did you pass him on your way out?” Everest asks her.

“Uh, who?”

“Matthew,” you tell her. “He was just here, you didn’t see him?”

“He was here?” Ramona questions, putting on a look of bewilderment. “When?”

“Just now. He left right before you got here.” Everest explains.

“Holy shit,” Ramona says. “What’d he want?”

“[y/n].”

“So,” you interrupt. “Your office? Now? We can go ahead and get going.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Everest stops you in your tracks, throwing her hands up. “Not so fast, you . . . you need to shower first.”

You look down at your outfit. You’re still dressed in Claire’s clothes and they’re completely disheveled. You haven’t showered or brushed your teeth since the last time you had sex, and the very thought makes you feel dirty. You look exactly how you feel. You sigh, “Fair enough.”

“We’ll wait in the car,” Everest nods, and motions to Ramona to follow her.

“What are we gonna do with her?” she says to Ramona as soon as they’re out of the house and walking down the driveway.

“I don’t know, she’s my boss . . . I can only help so much.”

“Yeah, well, I’ve known [y/n] for a long time now, and she’s never needed saving. But, something tells me we’re going to have to keep her away from this one.”

“From Matthew?” Ramona stops in her tracks.

“Well,” Everest stops, turns around to look at her. “She’s a grown woman. She’ll do what she wants. But, that zombie in there,” she motions to the house. “Who walks around the city in her pajamas for a man, is not [y/n]. Atleast, not the world’s [y/n]. People love her. She’s one of the few celebrities that’s kind and passionate and isn’t problematic. I’m just being proactive here.”

“Proactive?”

“She says she’s done with him. She told him she’s done with him. Now, we will just keep her on that path. Few months later, she and the rest of the world forget this ever happened and everything is back to normal.”

“You sound very sure of all of this.”

“Yeah, well, I like my schedules and I happen to like [y/n] so I better be sure. Come on, our ride’s further down the driveway,” Everest continues walking. While Ramona is stuck in place.

“Hey! Uh,” Ramona stutters, suddenly, loudly, causing Everest to turn around once again. “I think I left my water bottle in the house. I’ll meet you in the car?”

“Okay,” Everest eyes her. “It’s just around the corner. And tell [y/n] to hurry up.”

“I will!”

Ramona waits for Everest to continue down the driveway, and when she’s just far enough, Ramona turns around and acts as if she’s walking back up to your front door. When she’s positive Everest has made it to the car, she runs over to your mailbox. She opens it slowly, so it doesn’t creak as loud. The bright red envelope is the only thing in there, and she takes it out quickly. She looks at it for a moment, asks herself what the hell she’s doing. But she doesn’t have time to think right now, you could walk out at any moment. She closes your mailbox, shoves the envelope in her bag, and walks down the driveway.

Matthew Gubler, himself, is a disruption in the space-time continuum.

When you start tallying up the days, it just doesn’t make sense. Some days, every second feels like it’s crawling by. You’ll be in class, at the head of the class, and you’re surprised when your lesson plan ends atleast ten minutes early. And some days, time moves too fast. You find yourself running late for things, events, important people or things, which isn’t like you.

You call it Matthew Brain, and you keep that term to yourself. It happened fifteen years ago. And it’s happening now. It’s a slow, steady descent back to earth, back to reality. Time isn’t real with him, and you think that’s the reason you can’t remember much of your senior year. It’s a rush, a high to even be near him, and it’s the ultimate collapse when he’s gone. Really gone. Out of the life, for the second time.

Time has reset.

And what feels like one month with Matthew Gubler, only turns out to be four days.

You’re on a journey back to earth, and you haven’t even reached the bottom yet. It’s coming, but not now, you thought. You have time to prepare. And this time you’ll be ready. Ready to hit rock bottom, and spend another fifteen years digging yourself out. You have time, you’re sure of it.

Then Ramona comes into your office. She notices you crying, and you have to twirl around in your chair while you wipe the tears away. “Shit, Ro,” you try to laugh. “What’s up?”

“Uh, your afternoon class?” she reminds you. “With the girls at the community center? . . . What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

A lot. Not anything that you can really talk to Ramona about. And each day is something different. Like today, you’re feeling like a fucking idiot. You feel unbelievably stupid and lost and question why anyone in their right mind would choose to learn anything from you. You feel defeated, and you can’t get the look on that girl’s face out of your head.

You turn to Ramona with a soft smile, “I’m fine. I forgot about the class, thank you for reminding me. I just have to grab a few things before I go.”

“Well,” she sets her bag down in one of the chairs on the opposite side of your desk. She takes a seat in the other, “You’ve got some time, I haven’t even called the ride yet.”

You eye her, suspicious furrowing your eyebrows, “Oh, don’t do that.”

“Do what?” she seems genuinely confused.

“Sit there and feel sorry for me. I don’t need pity. I’m alright.”

“I’ve never seen you cry before . . . I’m just worried.”

“And I appreciate that, kid, I really do. But you don’t have to be, alright?”

“. . . okay.” she shrugs.

“Anyways,” you change the subject. “How much time do I have until I’ve gotta be out of here?”

“Um, I can call you a ride now, it should be here in about, ten minutes?” Ramona pulls her phone from her pocket, and holds it up as she dials the number.

“Sounds good,” you nod.

She leaves the room to make the call, and when she closes the door, you release a big sigh. As if you’d been holding it in the whole time she was here. You get up from your chair, and walk around the desk. Not paying attention, you stub your toe into the adjacent chair, so hard that the chair falls to the ground.

“Ow! Son of a b—“ your yelp is cut off by a painful groan, and your reach down to hold your foot. You look out in front of you, and Ramona’s entire bag has spilled out across the floor. “Fuck,” you mumble and instantly begin to clean it up.

It’s bright red. And it sticks out like a sore thumb. You reach over to grab it, but only because you recognized his hand writing. You run your fingers over your name, and your head is starting to hurt from the amount of pure confusion.

The door swings open, “Okay, they’ll be here in fifteen, but you have some wiggle room —“ Ramona stops when she sees the item in your hand.

You stand up straight, look her in the eye. She’s shaking. She’s trembling, and there are already tears in her eyes.

“I . . . can explain,” she says.

“Then explain.”

“Matthew . . . wanted me to — to give that to you.”

“When?”

“When, um, when he was at your house on Saturday.”

“You said you didn’t see him. You acted like you didn’t even know he had been there. You took this from him?” your voice goes up at slight octave. Not by much, but it stills cuts Ramona like a knife.

“No! No, I didn’t take it from him. I told him to put it in the mailbox. Which he did, but then I . . .”

“You? You what? Went into my mailbox and took it? Are you kidding?”

“It was crazy! I know! It was absolutely insane of me! But—But Everest was saying all these things about protecting your image, and being proactive, I just wanted to help. I thought —“

“Everest? Everest knew about this?”

“No. No. I took it when she wasn’t looking, and I just, I thought maybe if you didn’t know about the letter, you would be able to move on, y’know? Heal.”

“That was not your decision to make.”

“I know. [y/n], I’m so sorry. I can’t — I can’t even begin —“

“You’re right,” you interrupt her. “You can’t.”

You look down at the envelope in your hands, and shake your head. “God, Ro, I can barely look at you right now.”

“I’m sorry . . .”

You nod.

“I’ll . . . go wait for the car,” she nods, sadly and apologetically exiting the room.

You close the door behind her, and press your back against it. You slide to the floor, and bring the evelope close to your face. The day is not over, and you may need all night to take this in. You are not mentally prepared for whatever is in your hands, but, you rip it open anyway.

There’s a thin piece of paper inside. You pick it up, and it feels so frail that you worry it might rip. You set it on top of the envelope, and examine it. Your eyes dot over the page, until you realize, it’s not a letter at all.

American Airlines

[y/n] [y/l/n]

Seat: 14A

May Sixteenth, 2002

It’s a plane ticket. From fifteen years ago.

One you’ve never seen.

One you’ve never touched.

And now that it’s in your hands, you wish you never knew it existed.

[willgrahymn]

Strangely Estranged

this is my gift to @romansandersprotectionsquad for the @sanderssidesgiftxchange!! I really hope you like it :]

Description: Remus just wants to make his art, but Roman is still distressed by the events of SvS Redux/POF and it's affecting both of their abilities to create. When Remus goes to confront him about it, he gets a little more than he bargained for. Content warnings: Some Remus being Remus-y type lines, blood mentions (again, Remus), a good amount of swearing, and throwing some shade at Janus. Word count: 2747 I’ll rb with the ao3 link :]

- ’Honestly,’ Remus thought, ‘this painting could use more blood.’

He stared at the incomplete project. It was at least the 7th time he started on something today, but no matter what he always came to a pause.

Roman, that motherfucker, he probably had a creative block. Remus didn’t care much about only being half of Creativity, hell, it was fun coming up with the most gory stories he could imagine, but it seemed like whenever Roman hit a block he just had to drag him down with him.

He leaned back against his wall, tossing his paintbrush and catching it again. He stuck the brush in his mouth. Blue paint didn’t taste as good as green, but maybe he was just biased.

Remus glared at the painting. If it had eyes, he was sure they would be staring back, mocking him. Maybe he’d scrap the thing and use it as a target next time he played with his throwing stars.

He ground his foot into the stained carpet. Whether it was paint or blood didn’t matter. Come to think of it, he’d been at a pause for some time now. Roman hadn’t left his room nearly as much either. The only people he’d seen Roman hang out with recently were Virgil, Logan, and (inescapably) Thomas. Then there was Patton and Janus who hardly spent time together before. Now they never left each other's sides. Remus would be a liar if he said it wasn’t somewhat upsetting.

Remus loved drama. He loved watching people fight and be seconds from either murdering each other or making out right then and there. It was exciting to see people so close to their limit. Roman’s drama wasn’t fun though, it was just fucking sad.

He was pretty sure it would stay that way unless he took matters into his own hands. He grabbed his morningstar. He didn’t think he’d actually use it, but if he had to literally knock some sense into his dear brother, then so be it.

Walking down the hall of the mind palace the lighting got brighter. Silently, he wondered how the hell Virgil had managed to live with the other three for so long. With Roman’s obnoxiously loud personality and old villain accusations, he doubted the rogue raccoon could’ve slept the day away like he did when he tried to avoid him.

He stood in front of a tall, white door. It looked like something you’d find in a children’s movie or fairy tale that told the protagonist there was some sort of grand adventure on the other side… 

How boring.

Without bothering to knock, Remus opened the door to his brother's room. Maybe for Janus, he would have knocked. There was hardly anything that could truly shock him anymore with all the fun little fantasies that ran through his head, but Janus’ wrath was something he would save for a day when he needed that extra kick.

Then again, maybe he was wrong to say that he couldn't be shocked. Not when Prince Perfect’s room was such a mess. Not when one of his mirrors had been knocked to the floor. And certainly not when he took in the sight of the other half of Creativity, sitting there at the side of his bed in his black undershirt and dress pants.

Something in Remus’ guts told him there was something wrong here, and this time it wasn’t because he had been impaled or ate something Logan and Janus insisted he shouldn’t have. No, this was something else. Something he hadn’t been allowed to see since the two split up. One brother deciding he needed to be pure as white, and the other allowing himself to be the darkest black imaginable.

He stepped closer. Roman hadn’t made a sound, not yet, but it felt like approaching a lion. A lion that stood for courage yet fell to shattered pieces of what it once was.

And maybe if he hadn’t been feeling real, genuine concern for something other than Thomas’ lack of flare in his art, he would have laughed when his mind went to Scar and Mufasa.

It wasn’t like he cared though. Concern, maybe. But he couldn’t be bothered to care for his brother who he hardly ever spoke to for purposes other than making him uncomfortable with his ideas.

Roman shifted on his bed, still not bothering to look to see who entered. “I already told you I don’t want to talk about it.”

Remus rolled his eyes. Of course his brother would choose to be a little bitch about this.

“First off, you didn’t tell me shit.” He said. Roman sat up, looking at him. A mix of defense and curiosity in his glare. “Second, I’m not the one making your life any harder than I normally would.” His brother scoffed. “Aren’t you though?”

“You’re the one affecting my work!”

Roman huffed, pulling his legs up to his chest and hugging them closely. He liked the pressure. Logan would probably be able to tell him why if he asked. He remembered hearing a conversation between him and Virgil when the darker first showed up. Something about pressure was a stress reliever.

At the same time, Remus crossed his arms, tapping his boots and rubbing his fingers against his sleeves. Whatever response he had been waiting for didn’t come. Maybe he should leave. Pretend whatever this was wasn’t happening and go focus on something else until the other half got his shit together. That would be a lot easier than standing here, the air of the room suffocating him into silence.

Either way, neither brother knew what to say. It would be easy for the pensive prince to turn around, to tell the other not to speak to him and to go back to wherever he came from. At least it should have been.

Remus bit down on his lip not minding the pain. It wouldn’t do any good to try to beat at what was already broken. “I can go find someone else.” It was more of a statement than an offer.

His twin tensed. “Please don’t.”

Remus just nodded. He didn’t know what to do or what to say. Normally he didn’t have to think this hard. He didn’t want to care about his brother and his problems. He knew at least part of the reason behind the other’s mood was because of him because Roman hated him and being compared to him. Yet still, despite being twins he couldn’t help but feel like he had to care for his baby brother.

‘What the fuck am I supposed to do now?’

He was Dark Creativity, the embodiment of intrusive thoughts and other so-called disturbing ideas and imagery. It wasn’t something that ever upset him, and hell it was fun making the other Sides and Thomas uncomfortable. It was fun telling Patton things that would make him shift in his seat and try to change the topic as if nothing had happened. It was fun to create thoughts that would fuel anxiety and haunt the sad little Side who harbored them. It was more than amusing to sit beside Roman, watching as he tried to do his work and ignore his bothersome brother’s constant suggestions that ruined his fairytale fantasies.

If Thomas didn’t want to use all the available ingredients he gave him to create that was fine. He could manage just fine! Really, the repression only made him stronger.

But Roman knew how to make people feel those warm fuzzy feelings that were like caterpillars in your ribs. Something that looking at it now, maybe Remus regretted not trying to pick up on the wholesome little messages that his brother always cared about. At least maybe then he’d have a better idea how to deal with all of these emotions going on. Even Logan would have done better in this situation.

His brother sighed, sitting up and turning to finally face him. He looked worse than expected. No wonder he didn’t want to see anyone else. Remus couldn’t tell what he was feeling, taking in the sight of this mess. Roman’s brow furrowed, his jaw clenched. He leaned against the wall with his arms crossed, his nails digging into his skin.

“Why are you still here?” He asked.

Remus bit his lip and chose to ignore the question. “I know you’re pissed about Jan being accepted.”

“Yeah duh,” Roman scoffed. He sounded like a dam ready to break. “Excuse me for not being absolutely overjoyed at this… Manipulative Malefactor being accepted by our very own Moralidad.”

The Duke nodded. Sure, you could call him friends with Double D, but he wasn’t going to be like him and lie and deny that Janus certainly had… a way… of getting what he wanted, whether it meant using others as a stepping stone or not.

“I never should have trusted him.” Roman continued. “I mean, I never even liked him. Hell, right after he revealed himself to Thomas I said I hated him… I only went along with what he wanted because he pretended to be someone I’m supposed to be able to trust, and then he used me again by flattering me with fake love and bringing up Thomas’ dreams. And I just– I just keep falling for it because I’m an idiot and I keep fucking everything u—”

He hadn’t noticed Remus approaching him or pulling him into a hug until it happened.

It was tense at first. Roman froze at contact. Slowly, he sunk into his brother's arms, not caring about the way the material scratched against his face. He just wanted to feel safe.

“What’s happening?” He asked.

Remus wasn’t sure he had an answer.

“I think Patton would refer to it as brotherly bonding, but I really don’t know.” Remus laughed lightly.

Eventually, Remus slowly pushed his brother off of him, still holding onto his shoulders and smiling in a way he could only hope came off as sympathetic. On any other occasion, Roman would despise the fact that his brother was just the tiniest bit taller than him, but right now he didn’t care. He wouldn’t tell him it was good for hugs though, he hadn’t lost all of his dignity.

“Listen, Ro-bro, we’re twins. What affects you affects me too. I know it might not change much, and you might still not want to be around me. That’s fine. Just… remember that we’re two Sides in a trenchcoat trying to make up for one, got it?” Roman nodded, rubbing at his eyes and smiling slightly. “I would have expected a darker way of phrasing that from you.”

Remus shook his head. “I may not think much, but I do know enough to understand it’s probably not the best timing for it.”

He smiled, watching as his brother lightened up a bit.

The room was still a mess. They’d have to fix it up later. Not right now though, he didn’t think his brother was ready enough to face his own destruction.

“C’mon, get your outfit on.” “Huh?” “You weren’t planning to stay locked up in here like Rapunzel all day, were you?” “I mean��� kind of, yeah?” Remus shook his head. “Not happening,” He said. “We gotta do some dumb shit to make you feel better.” “Ree, I’m fine now, really.”

He ignored him, grabbing Roman’s stupidly bright white shirt off the floor and throwing it at him. Checking around for his sash afterwards.

“You at least gotta put yourself together! I know how you are about your looks– even if mine are better.”

Roman rolled his eyes before pulling his shirt on, grabbing his sash from under his pillow. “I can’t stand you.” They both knew it wasn’t the truth. Not right now at least.

“I’m going to fix… this.” Roman said as he waved his hand in front of his face.

The prince left to his bathroom, grabbing some of his makeup from his desk as he went. Remus flopped onto his brother's bed. This wasn’t exactly where he expected his day to go. It was fine though. Actually, it probably went a lot better than whatever he originally planned. Bitching at Roman could be fun, but he doubted it would have made anything better. Hopefully getting rid of some emotional block would stop the art block too. It sounded like something Logic would approve of.

Remus stared up at the glow in the dark stars that littered his brother’s ceiling. Roman’s room was less loud than usual. More quiet. Like a heartbeat that once echoed so loudly had suddenly stopped, or a fire which finally died out leaving nothing but smoke and ash behind.

He heard it when the faucet turned on, when a hairbrush hit the floor, and when Roman cursed at his eyeliner.

‘His hands must be shaky.’ They’d have to fix that.

Remus got up again, half-assedly making his brother’s bed and tidying up the place. He didn’t know where everything went, so he could only hope he was putting stuff where it shouldn’t have ever been. Even if he was trying to cheer up his brother now didn’t mean he couldn’t work in advance to cause trouble for him later.

When Roman came out he looked as if nothing had happened. Like nobody would be able to look at him and think twice of if he was okay. It was an art in itself to be a raging storm and to settle down to the tranquility of dewdrops on flower petals within a matter of minutes.

When had he learned to do that?

Or maybe it was just that he didn’t spend enough time around the other to know. Maybe if one of the other Sides saw Roman now, they wouldn’t even have to study his movements or expression to know he had been upset. It would be as easy as looking at  him and recognizing the scripted smiles and rehearsed words for what they were. Was he really that bad at being a brother to fall for his own twins’ tricks?

Roman shifted on his feet. “So… What are we doing?”

“Oh!” Remus bounced, the beads on his shirt clicking together. “Well I was thinking about it earlier and since Papa Patton and Daddy Dee are spending so much time together–” “Never call them that ever again.” “You never let me have fun! But fine. You know how those two have been hanging out more.”

“I can’t let you do anything mean to Patton, he’s off limits.”

Remus pouted. “I thought you were mad at him!” “He’s Patton!” Remus glared, and Roman glared back.

Remus sighed. “You’re so lame, but I guess we can just focus on the snake. Oh! And don’t worry, I can take the fault. Besides, I haven’t fucked around with him in a while and have been waiting for a good day to do it.” He grinned. Roman would have considered it evil, but this, this was pure sibling mischief. “I was thinking we could start subtle like moving his shit 2 inches to the left and work our way up from there. I was thinking about leaving my pet rats in his room and letting them go wild, but he is a snake and I don’t trust like that…”

Roman tried to stifle a laugh. Remus tried not to smile. Remus turned away, heading to his room to put his abandoned work away before anything else. Roman, he noticed, hadn’t followed. Slowly, he turned to him. “Are you coming?” “Oh, yeah I just...“ Roman paused, taking a deep breath and smiling softly. A real smile, not the mask he had given before. “Thank you. For doing all this.” Remus’ eyes softened, nodding as he spoke again. “Don’t go getting too soft on me, Ro-bro. I’m still going to attack your side of the Imagination.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything less.” The two brothers stood there, an awkward yet comfortable quiet moment of understanding neither wanted to interrupt. “C’mon,” Remus said, waving his brother along. “We have vengeance in our hearts and glitter in our pockets. Let’s fuck shit up.”

The prince glanced to himself in the mirror. Now wasn’t the time to focus on his shattered world view, or how his brother may not be as horrible as he thought. Now was the time to have fun messing with the one who had messed with him.

He looked to his brother, eyes sparkling. “Let’s do it.”

[out-of-jams]

Howl’s Moving Castle || Part One || kth

↠ Howl’s Moving Castle ↞ Part of my Ghibli Yandere Series!

It was an accident: offending the witch. But he didn’t take it lightly, cursing you to age into an old hag overnight. With no way to reverse the spell, you took it upon yourself to hunt down the only person who may have been able to help. But the self-absorbed wizard who lived hidden away in the moving castle wouldn’t be so easy to convince.

Especially when it came to letting you go.

Warnings/Genre: Horror. Soft Yandere!Taehyung. Howl!Taehyung. Magic.  Mature themes. Light violence. Some fluff. Explicit language. 18+

Word Count: 7.5k

Part 1 of 3.

A/N: Hey guys. Holy shit did this take a lot longer than I’d originally planned it to. I’ve decided to split it into three parts instead of two so that I could get it out to you guys quicker. Hope you all are staying safe out there! (just a warning, this is unedited haha).

All of my works are purely fiction. Everything I write is my intellectual property and therefore belongs to me. ©out-of-jams. Do not copy or repost without permission.

                              | Next | Masterlist | 

In, through. Pull. Around.

In, through. Pull. Around.

The steel needle twisting around your fingertips did so without a second thought. Pushed through the heavy material to stitch together fabric until it resembled something wearable. Your eyes were glazed over as your mind wandered away from your task. Sewing was simple, so-much-so that you could look away from the hat in your hands and still thread it together. It came from the experience of owning a hat shop for most of your life.

“Is that Taehyung’s castle?”

The excitable titering of women’s voices brought you out of your trance-like state and left you blinking down at the half-sewn brown hat in your hands.

“It can’t be.”

You let the grasp you had on the needle falter in order to send a glance at the gaggle of women gathered at the window to the left. Through an archway they stood, with their bright colored dresses and overly large skirts. One of them tapped against the glass windowpane facing the street like the rest of them weren’t already looking.

And you couldn’t help the curiosity that had your head turning back to stare out of the window in front of you. Placed in the wall right above your cluttered work desk. You squinted in an attempt to see through the smog lingering in the air outside to the rolling green hills in the distance. Past the tops of buildings cramping the streets.

You could just barely see it, the giant machine that seemed to almost float across the ground it walked on. Even at its distance you could tell it was big, taller than the top of the highest building in the city. But you’d never seen it up close. No one had and lived to tell the tale of it.

The sight wasn’t common, but it wasn’t quite rare either. The monstrous mechanical structure that just barely resembled a castle had roamed the land for years. Ventured from town to town, city to city, never stopping in one place. Where it went and what it did, you hadn’t a clue. You’d only seen it a total of three times throughout your life.

But never close enough to get a glimpse of the wizard who was rumored to dwell within it. So evil and so powerful that no one dared to go near.

As it disappeared into the fog, you sighed. Turned back to the needle lying between your fingers with distaste. You didn’t hate what you did with your life, making hats day in and day out. But you didn’t like it either. Never had. But you’d been forced into taking over the shop when your father passed away years ago. It was boring, the routine, and you couldn’t help your craving for something more.

For adventure.

“I heard that the last man who saw Taehyung’s face disappeared. Vanished right into thin air.”

You shook your head to snap yourself out of your thoughts and went back to work.

In, through. Pull. Around.

In, through. Pull. Aro--

“I heard that he looks like a monster.”

“A monster? Don’t be ridiculous, Lotty. I heard that he’s quite handsome. Likes to go into towns and seduce women to take as his own. Then he kills them afterwards!”

The needle fell from your fingers to dangle in between your legs by the threat still attached to the fabric. Frustrated at the lack of ability to focus due to the obnoxious women not working, you dropped the unfinished hat onto your work table. And pushed back your wooden stool to stand up.

The four women didn’t turn at your movement, didn’t even acknowledge your presence there. While they loved to gossip up a storm, they were good at what they did. So you didn’t berate them for their lack of work. Just grabbed your bag and slipped out the room and down the stairs. Maybe a few moments to yourself would do you well. You’d been stuck up in that stuffy shop for hours and taking a quick break wouldn’t hurt. Especially when you could barely focus on your work anyway.

The door to the shop closed tightly behind you and you took a moment to pull out a piece of cloth from your bag. Slipping it over your nose, you adjusted the thin straps of the face mask behind your ears until it sat perfectly. It wasn’t safe to step outside without one because the smog in the city was unhealthy to breathe in. Polluted by the airships that flew above your head and cast streaks of black smoke through the sky. From the four-wheeled cars that prowled the cobblestone streets like cats, puffing unbreathable air through the Square.

You hitched your bag higher up onto your shoulder as you took off at a sedated pace. There was a large amount of people crowding the streets, more so than what was usual in a city as large as that one. Perhaps it had something to do with the military parading through the roads on their way to the king’s castle as they returned from wherever they’d been. Taking up space like they owned the place. Like the citizens of Market Chipping actually wanted them there.

No one did. Not when your land of Ingary had been at war with the neighboring kingdom of Strangia for longer than you’d been alive. No one knew why exactly you were at odds with one another. Some debated that it had to do with stolen land, others insisted that the king of Strangia had done something to slight your own king. Whatever it was turned the land into a warzone.

“Hey, watch it!” A sharp elbow found its way into your side. And you stumbled back, a grunt falling from your throat as a short, middle aged man shoved past you with a glare.

He held a flag in his hand with the emblem of the royal family embroidered into it. Either he was on his way to protest the military parading through the city, or he was going to embrace them. While a majority of the people hated the presence of soldiers in Market Chipping, took to the streets to scream at them until they left. Some of the population praised them, welcomed them with open arms like they didn’t leave a trail of dead bodies and burned cities in their wake.

Because wherever the military went, death was soon to follow after.

You knew the main roads would’ve been packed from end to end with people and you didn’t feel like dealing with crowds. With more elbows forcing their way into the grooves of your ribs. So you took a shortcut through one of the alleyways closest towards your shop. They wouldn’t be as congested seeing as how almost all of the citizens poured themselves out into the streets for a reason.

So your journey was quiet. And your shoes scuffed at the ground as you wandered through the mazes between the buildings. The sounds of military vehicles driving through the streets that you could occasionally see through the gaps between buildings filled the silence. Along with shouts from the people pouring out of homes and hanging halfway out of the windows. Who sat on their balconies with heavy frowns on their faces.

A pair of single-manned airships flew above your head with the flag of the king following behind, attached to the backs of the machines to catch the air. You were close to your destination. Just needed to walk through a few more twisted alleyways until you made it.

“Well, well. What do we have here?”

You didn’t stop when the deep growl hit your eardrums. Kept walking in hopes that whoever had tried to talk to you would take the hint and leave you alone.

“Hey!” A rough hand grabbed at the bag hanging from your shoulder and pulled you backwards. And you tripped over your own feet in an attempt to stay upright. “I’m talking to you!”

With another tug, you were sent careening back into someone’s chest. The stench of cigarettes and whiskey hit you like a wall and had you sending a glare over your shoulder. A man towered above you with a blue rimmed hat pulled down low across his forehead. But you could still see the dark eyes that glimmered beneath like a snake.

“You lost, little mouse?” His lips, chapped and thin and unhindered by the facemask pulled down to his chin, lifted up into a smirk that spelled nothing but trouble. The navy blue military blazer on his back didn’t bring you relief. Quite the opposite really. Especially when the backdoor to a pub hanging open behind him spilled out another man that came stumbling to his side.

Caged you in like an animal.

“Let go.” Your jaw clenched as you attempted to pull away from the hand that held onto your bag like a leash.

“What do we have here, Reny? Why don’t you let us help you find your way?” The second man had a dark caterpillar that sat atop his lip in the form of a mustache. He leaned down to fan his heated beer stained breath across your face and it was only the facemask that prevented you from smelling it. “And we’ll only ask for one thing in return. How’s that sound?”

The first man let go of your bag to watch you stumble backwards with an amused flash in his eyes. You bit your lip in an attempt to stop it from quivering. But it did nothing to prevent the fear from flooding your veins and taking hold of your throat.

“I’m not interested. Let me pass, please.” You hoped that they weren’t able to hear how loud your heart was beating.

They were bigger than you, stronger than you. And you didn’t know what they’d do if they got their hands on you. Weren’t sure how far you’d make it if you had to run. The closest main street was farther than you would have liked, to the point where you could barely hear the roar of the crowd.

The second man took a few steps closer towards you. “Aw, don’t be like that sweeth--”

“Are you deaf?” That voice didn’t come from either of the men in front of you. It brushed through your ears with its rich baritone and had you straightening where you stood, tense muscles unconsciously relaxing. Especially when an arm wound itself around your shoulders to settle with a comforting weight, bringing with it warmth that heated your skin. “Or are you just stupid?”

The first thing you saw was a slender hand decorated with a plethora of multicolored rings as it casually adjusted the bag hanging haphazardly from your shoulder. And you followed it up, and up until your eyes landed on who it was attached to.

You could only see his side profile, but that was all you needed to have your breath catch in your throat.

Harsh, but gentle, was the first thought that popped into your mind. His nose, while soft and rounded at the tip, contrasted with the sharp angle of his jawbone. Even his hair followed the same guidelines as the rest of him. It looked silky, smooth, but the dark curls it fell in across his forehead and to the nape of his neck made him appear innocent, and yet not.

“Because I believe that the lady said she wasn’t interested.” The voice that fell from the stranger’s bow shaped lips was deep, strong, and filled with a humorous edge that teased around the syllables.

He wasn’t looking at you, but his arm still around your shoulders gave off the same amount of heat that his gaze more than likely would.

“This has nothing to do with you. Mind your business.” One of the men, you didn’t know which because you’d yet to take your eyes off of the strange man, spoke.

You were sure that you would get a kink in your neck from how much you were straining to look up at the man towering over you. But you couldn’t help but stare, not when a smile perked up around the edges of his soft looking mouth. The stranger tilted his head to the side and the emerald earring dangling from a chain pierced through his ear brushed against tanned his neck.

“Or, here me out.” He lifted a single eyebrow and nodded pointedly at the still opened door to the pub behind the men. “You go back inside and leave this woman alone. How’s that sound?”

They didn’t respond.

Tearing your eyes away from a mole painted onto the tip of the man’s nose, you watched confusedly as the military men suddenly stood up straight. And with their gazes blank and mouths partially opened, they turned on their heels and staggered back inside the building like they’d never left it.

Like they’d been compelled to do so.

“Are you alright?”

You blinked yourself out of your stupor and turned to look back up at the man who’d saved you. With his complete and utter attention now focused on you, the breath that’d caught itself in your throat earlier struggled to remove itself. Which left you floundering with your mouth opening and closing, but no sound escaping.

“Miss?” He leaned in a little closer, brows knitting together in concern. And his eyes. They were the softest blue that you’d ever seen.

Clearing your throat, you nodded. “Yes, thank you for rescuing me.”

He smiled, a box-shaped, gentle thing that had his eyes creasing in the corners. You didn’t even think to wonder why he was outside without a mask. “No need to thank me.”

And then he winked.

Ah, a lady’s man then.

“Well, thank you anyway.” You smiled in return before stepping out from beneath his arm. And with a glance down the alleyway, you gestured over your shoulder. “I should get going.”

His arm dropped back down to his side, hidden beneath the dark blue and grey jacket that hung around his shoulders like a cape. The black, long-sleeve blouse-like shirt he wore stood out even amongst the darkened alley. “Where are you heading? I’ll escort you there.”

“You don’t have to, really. I don’t want to waste anymore of your time.” You tried to argue, not because you didn’t want him to, but because he’d already gone out of his way for you once. And you didn’t want him to feel obligated to do so a second time. “I’ll be fine on my own.”

“Nonsense. It’s no trouble at all.” The man stepped forward to rest a hand on your shoulder once again, only that time he turned you around to start walking down the alleyway. “Besides, someone needs to ensure that no more danger finds you.”

The pressure of his hand on your shoulder was gentle, but firm in the way he guided you. And when he leaned down to whisper in your ear, the look in his eyes was something that you couldn’t quite put your finger on. Maybe if you would have spared a second to take another look, you would have seen it for the warning that it was.

“But just don’t look behind you.” The man’s breath was warm against the shell of your ear. “Because I’m being followed.”

Alarm sprang through you at his sudden admission. “Wha--?”

He merely winked at you and held a finger to his lips before leaning back out of your personal space. And when you tried to turn your head to look behind you, he stopped you with a hand to your cheek.

“Don’t look back. Just walk.”

The alleyway was long. Neverending. It encased the two of you in a bubble where even the loud shouts from the people in the streets couldn’t pierce through.

“Who’s following you?” You asked in a hushed whisper.

Still unnamed, the stranger glanced at you out of the corner of his eye. A lot of different things swam in the ocean that was his iris. Things that you couldn’t discern, things that were hidden just below the surface. And just as he went to part his lips in answer, his attention left you to focus on something behind you.

When you turned to look too, all you were able to see were shadows emerging from the alley walls like ghosts. With long, spindly-like limbs and headless bodies, they filled the spaces where the two of you had just vacated. Crawling over each other in an effort to reach the man at your side.

Fear bubbled in your throat. What the hell were those things?

“Sorry.” If he was trying to reassure you, he was doing a horrible job. “They weren’t supposed to find me so soon.”

Especially when the nameless creatures began to pour out of the walls in front of you like an endless tidal wave.

“Why are they--”

“No time.” The hand he had on your shoulder turned gripping as he quickly turned left at the fork in the alley and dragged you down it. “Just walk.”

Your eyebrows shot up into your hairline, but you did your best to keep up with his brisk stride anyway. A quick glance behind you had another bout of fear surging through you.

They were close.

How had you managed to escape one type of danger, just to wind up in the clutches of another?

You turned back to the front.

And let out a scream.

Because those creatures had cut you off again. Only now they moved faster, with their spider-like arms and gaping maws extended to capture you in their grasp. The man at your side let out a curse before stopping in his tracks to wrap both his arms around your waist.

“Hang on!”

Hang on?

“To what?”

Your question went unanswered. At least verbally.

The only warning you got was the tensing of the muscles in his slim arms before he leapt into their air. But it wasn’t an ordinary jump. Your feet left the cobbled ground and even with your face pressed into the stranger’s chest, you could still see if you looked down. Could see how one of the creature's claws missed your foot by a mere centimeter. Could see how they piled on top of each other as both sides crashed into the other in a wave of black.

You’d thought that the two of you would go falling right down onto them. That they’d devour you whole until you could no longer see the light of day. But you didn’t.

Because you were flying.

At least, that’s what you assumed when you continued to soar through the air like a wingless bird. And when the both of you cleared the rooftop of the building next to the alley, well, you couldn’t help but dig your fingers into the back of the stranger’s shirt.

“H-how is this happening?” Maybe if you weren’t a hundred feet in the air, you would have been embarrassed by the way your voice came out in a stuttered squeak. Or the way you clung to him like a particularly stubborn barnacle. But you weren’t. Because you’d never been so high up before in your entire life.

The man keeping you from falling to your death chuckled. It was a nice sound: smooth, deep and warm with his amusement. He pulled back a little, just far enough to let his eyes meet your own. Though that did little to loosen the death grip you had on him.

“Magic.” His boxy smile made another appearance as his gaze sparkled in mirth. More than likely at the wide-eyed, stunned expression on your face.

“You’re a wizard then?”

He merely winked in response before reaching behind him to grab at your wrists. “Do you trust me?”

“I..,” Your answer got stuck in your throat. Did you trust him? Hell, you didn’t even know his name. But he had saved you and your life was technically in his hands. So what harm could it bring really? To put your faith in a mere stranger? “I suppose so.”

“Then let go.”

“What?” Was he crazy?

His eyebrows raised playfully, disappearing behind his curly bangs. “Trust me. Let go.”

You hesitated, gaze snapping back downwards at the city below. At the streets filled to the brim and packed with people who looked no bigger than ants. If you fell, you’d die. Become nothing more than a splatter on the cobblestoned streets.

As your heart raced in your chest, you looked back up at the man with your bottom lip caught between your teeth. Well, you’d wanted adventure, right?

Ever so slowly, you loosened the tight grip you had on his shirt until your palms were pressed flat against his back. His grip on your wrists was loose, not enough to keep you up should you fall. Taking a deep breath, you removed your hands from him completely.

And didn’t fall.

“See?” You could hear the smile in his voice even when you were too busy staring at your floating feet to look at him. “Now, are you ready for the best part?”

“Best part?” The question left you with a voice filled with wonder.

The stranger hummed and used his grip on your wrists to spin you around until your back was to his chest. His hands on you were barely there, just hovering beneath your fingertips. And when he leaned down to murmur in your ear, the scent of him flooded your senses.

Sweet like freshly mowed grass on a summer evening.

“Yes. Now walk!”

You were positive now: he was absolutely crazy. Magic or not. “But we aren’t standing on anything.”

“Didn’t I say to trust me?” He mused.

Though he didn’t give you a chance to respond because he took a few steps forward, which in turn made you follow. Made a gasp leave your lips when your feet hit something solid that wasn’t there. As you continued to walk through the air like it was completely normal.

Magic. You’d only ever seen it displayed from afar where you could barely make out the details, never up close. Never to the point where you could feel it rippling off the man at your back like it was second nature. It was...it was…

“Amazing.”

“You like it?” The man smiled at you from the corner of your eye. “This is always my favorite part. Look down.”

And you did.

From the ground the city always looked drab. Lifeless. Dull. But from up high, where the pollution didn’t quite reach? It didn’t look so bad. Not when the brightly painted rooftops stood out amongst the grey slated military vehicles, like a beam of light in the dark.

“I believe that this is your stop.” The man’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. Drew your attention to the fact that the two of you were descending into an area that looked very familiar.

Your feet touched down on a balcony attached to the side of a building. One you’d stood on many times before. When you turned to look at the man who’d just flown you halfway across the city, he had his arms planted on the wooden railing like he belonged there. Despite the fact that he was hovering in the air on the other side.

“Unfortunately, I have some things to go take care of. But I’m sure we’ll run into each other again.” He threw you a charming wink. “So try not to find anymore trouble in the meantime, okay?”

You nodded slowly with a smile forming on your lips. “I’ll try my best.”

Something flashed in his eyes, but it was gone too quickly for you to really see it. “Good girl.”

And then he flew out of sight as if he’d never been there in the first place.  

Like the pop of a bubble, the noise of the crowded streets came flooding in. And with the roar of the protesting yells brought a thought to your mind.

How did he know where you were headed? You’d never told him.

The inside of the building was just familiar as the outside. However, unlike the raging streets outside, once you’d closed the balcony doors behind you, you’d been enveloped in silence. Not even the shouts from beyond the four walls surrounding you could enter inside. Which, to be completely honest, gave you a little bit of peace. There was only so much yelling you could take.

Old wooden stairs creaked beneath the weight of your feet as you descended the well worn staircase to the bottom floor. With your facemask safely deposited in your bag, the scent of baked bread hypnotized your nose as you followed the smell. The swinging door to the kitchen swung open underneath your hand with a squeak to announce your presence.

“Hey.” You greeted the man on the opposite end of the room. He stood with his back towards you, the strings of a white apron tied behind his neck and right above his broad shoulders. Before you’d announced your presence, the man had been bobbing his head to a soundless tune as his hands rolled out fresh dough onto the countertop.

“Y/n?” His head turned to look over his shoulder, and once he spotted you in the doorway, his plump lips pulled back into a grin. “It’s been a while.”

You snorted, pushing off the doorframe to walk across the room. “I just saw you like, three days ago, Seokjin.”

“What?” Even though Seokjin had turned back around to continue kneading the dough, you could practically hear the pout on his lips. “Am I not allowed to miss my little sister?”

Despite the fact that he was the older sibling by a few years, sometimes it felt more like the opposite. Shaking your head, you couldn’t help the smile on your face as you leaned your side against the counter. From where you stood in the kitchen, you were just able to see through the glassless window cut out of the wall and into the front of Seokjin’s bakery.

“How’s business been?” You asked, lip caught between your teeth. The front of the shop was empty of customers, leaving the freshly baked sweets to sit beneath the glass case untouched.

A sigh left your brother’s lips and he stopped in his work to send a sad look through the window. “Same as usual.”

It wasn’t that Seokjin was bad at baking or anything. Quite the opposite. However, with the war going on, not many people had the extra money to spend on pastries and things that could be considered “non-essential.” The only reason your brother’s shop was able to stay afloat was from his usual customers that never failed to buy from him.

Hell, you didn’t even know how you managed to keep your hat shop open.

“Things will turn around.” You tried to reassure him, gaining a tiny smile from Jin in return. “The war can’t go on forever.”

“Hopefully you’re right about that one.” He was frowning again, eyes dull as his thoughts drifted away somewhere you couldn’t follow. After a moment he shook his head. “Speaking of, how did you get here with all those people and cars in the streets?”

“I--” Crossing your arms over your chest, you contemplated how to tell your brother that you’d simply flown over the rooftops like a bird. “I...met a wizard.”

Seokjin choked on his spit. “A what?”

You broke eye contact with an awkward clearing of your throat. “A wizard.”

“Y/n.” His tone turned stern like the elder sibling he was. “A wizard? Seriously? You should know better how dangerous they can be.”

Staring down at the toe of your shoe that you dug into the wooden floorboards, you shrugged half-heartedly. “I know, but he saved me, Seokjin.”

Jin released a haggard, deep sigh and you could see his shoulders slump out of the corner of your eye. “Yes well, be more careful next time, alright? It could have been someone dangerous, like you-know-who. Or the Wi--”

Ring!

Both you and Seokjin snapped your heads back to the front of the store just in time to see a man meander through. He had a dark blue hat pulled down low over his eyes and a walking cane clutched in one of his hands. And when the bottom of his long coat brushed across the floor as he approached the front counter, Jin wiped his hands on the front of his apron.

“Hello!” He called to the man looking at the sweets beneath the glass case, an inquisitive expression on his face. Your brother’s hand squeezed your shoulder once as he walked past you towards the front.

This conversation isn’t over. It said. Don’t think I’ll forget.

Well, you’d take that for the dismissal that it was.

Your home was dark, quiet, once the front door was shut behind you.

The hat shop was attached to the bottom of your house, but only you had the key to get upstairs to where you lived. And with the sun long set beneath the skyline and the moon in its place, everyone had gone home. Which left you.

Alone.

Like always.

You knew that if you told Seokjin how lonely you truly felt, how you hated being alone, he wouldn’t hesitate to open his doors for you. But he had enough problems on his own plate and you didn’t want to intrude on him and his fiancé anyway. They’d just recently gotten engaged, so you didn’t even want to think about how awkward it would be if you moved in with them.

Friends weren’t something that you had aplenty of either. If any at all. Not that you were too shy to make any, you just didn’t know how. Living in a city surrounded by people all the time was actually very lonely. And making connections beyond the work relationships you had with your employees was excruciatingly difficult.

So you’d just forced yourself to suck it up. To deal with the aching longing you had deep in your gut.

A sigh escaped your lips as you dropped your bag onto the floor of your bedroom. However, just as you were about to start undressing to change into your pajamas, you felt the fluttering of a breeze brushing against your skin. Frowning, you turned to look questioningly at your open bedroom window. Because you could have sworn that you’d closed it that morning. You never left it open when you weren’t home.

As another gentle gush of wind played with the curtains on either side of the window, you hurried over to slide it shut.

“You really should keep that locked.”

That wasn’t your voice.

With a gasp, you whirled around and pressed yourself back against the glass of the window. Your heart leapt to your throat the second that you caught sight of the man standing in the center of your bedroom. Where you’d just been not only a few seconds ago.

You didn’t recognize him. Had never seen him before. And either he could feel the fear that flooded your veins like white hot fire, or he could tell by the expression on your face, because his dark green eyes flickered.

“Wh--who--” You couldn’t even get the sentence out past your trembling mouth. So you snapped it shut and glanced to the opened door behind him, the one that would lead back out into the hallway by the staircase. Maybe you could make it if you were quick enough.

“Don’t even think about it, little dove.” His voice, while not as deep as you would have expected, was still intimidating all the same. Even with the amused way the words left his mouth. And either he’d read your mind, or you were just ridiculously obvious with your thoughts. “You wouldn’t make it very far, and you’d just piss me off. And you don’t want to piss me off, do you, Dove?”

Swallowing, you shook your head slowly. Watched as the man ran a hand through his neat blond hair. And when he smiled, his eyes scrunched up in the corners. Though it did well to make him appear less threatening, you didn’t believe it for a second.

“What do you want?” God, you silently cursed yourself for not turning the lights on in your room. Because the dark made it so much worse. Made him look like a demon apparating out of thin air.

He didn’t answer. Not right away. Just crossed the room like he owned it and you were the trespasser. Watched the way you pressed yourself further back against the window like it could somehow save you. Even if it was still open, you wouldn’t have been able to survive the three story drop to the ground. But that fact didn’t stop you from trying to pull up the latch anyway.

“You’re not at all what I expected.” He slowed in his approach, head tilting to the side like he was analysing a wild animal. And it seemed as if he were talking to himself, like you weren’t even there. “But that doesn’t matter.”

Just as your fingers lifted the latch on the window, he crossed the remaining feet separating you in a flash and slammed his hand down on yours. A shock of pain shot up through your arm, tearing a gasp from your lips.

“I told you not to piss me off.” The man tutted. He was close enough to look down at you, eyes raking your face as if in search of something. Close enough for his scent to wash over you and threaten to drown you in the pure heaviness to it. Like the pollution that filled the air outside, or the ache of loneliness that would sometimes pang deep within your chest. And when his full lips turned up into a smirk, you swallowed. Hard.

“It seems you’re no good with directions, but no matter.” His free hand came up to grab your chin between his fingers hard enough to dig into your skin. Slamming your eyes shut, you weren’t sure what he was going to do. Kill you maybe. Probably. Most likely.

But what you didn’t expect, was for him to lean forward and press his lips to your forehead in a kiss. Your eyes widened at the softness of his mouth, a stark contrast to the painful grip he had on you, and couldn’t help the confusion that took root in your heart. Especially with the invisible static that drifted off the man in waves.

It was familiar, almost, to the wizard from the alleyway. But not quite. Tinted with a wrongness that raised the hair on the back of your neck.

And when he pulled away with one last squeeze of your chin, his words echoed through your mind like he’d planted them there.

“You really should have let yourself get killed in that alley. How unfortunate for you. But no matter, give Taehyung my regards.”

Your eyes shot open, only to find your room empty.

Or maybe that was just because your world went dark.

Something felt off.

Even with your eyes still closed and your mind barely conscious, you felt it.

Like everything was slow, groggy. Not quite right.

With a groan, you peeled your heavy eyes open and stared blankly at the bottom of your dresser. It didn’t register at first that your cheek was pressed to the wooden floor of your bedroom until a few more moments of empty blinking. Of forcing your eyes back open when they threatened to close.

God, you were so tired.

And the last thing you remembered was hazy, blurry like a well-forgotten dream. No matter how hard you tried to recall the events that lead up to you sprawled across the floor like a dog, you failed. Slipped through your fingers just before you closed your hand around the memories.

Another groan had you shifting to try and sit up properly. Your muscles ached, joints ached, everything ached. And the pounding headache that threatened to turn your brain to mush wasn’t helping.

“What…” The word came out as nothing more than a barely-there whisper, tongue dry and stuck to the roof of your mouth like you’d eaten sand. It wasn’t until you stood up that you caught a glimpse of movement out of the corner of your eye.

A scream bubbled up in your throat, but left just as quickly in a whoosh of hot air. Because staring back at you through the reflection in the mirror above your desk, was an old woman. Her face was wrinkled with crows feet and laugh lines, drooping like the flesh was barely hanging on. And she stood hunched over as if she were unable to fully stand up. Though it wasn’t the way her grey hair stiffened around her shoulders that had your stomach dropping.

No.

It was her eyes that caught your attention and refused to let go.

Because they were your eyes. When you blinked, the old woman blinked like a mirror.

It couldn’t...you couldn’t…

With a shaking hand, you slowly lifted your fingers to your face and the old woman echoed the movement.

“Holy shit.” You croaked. And yet again, the old woman did the same.

You were...her...but how…?

Grimacing to fight off the panic that tightened your throat, you closed your eyes in an attempt to think back on how the hell you’d ended up that way. But…

Nothing.

Only a bodiless voice that whispered through your memory on a loop that you could barely hear.

“But no matter, give Taehyung my regards.”

“Tae...hyung?” Your tongue tasted his name like it was something foreign. And you felt a brief flicker of alarm at having said his name aloud. The wizard who lived in the castle whose parents told the children about to scare them from sneaking out of the house.

Your eyes snapped back open in fear. There was a lot of power in a name. But when you met your own gaze in the mirror once again, you blew out a small sigh of relief at your bedroom being empty. However…

...maybe..?

Were you supposed to find him? To have him undo whatever curse had been casted upon you. Was that right? Was that why his name kept repeating on a loop that you couldn’t silence? But he was dangerous, would more than likely outright slit your throat before offering you a favor. Then again, you’d seen no proof to those rumors, so maybe they weren’t true.

Or maybe you were just trying to fool yourself into going off in search of him.

But you couldn’t continue to live life as an old woman. Hell, your lifespan had more than likely been sliced down to almost nothing now. So, it was either die by the sudden onslaught of old age or take your chances with a dark wizard.

What choice did you really have?

The city of Market Chipping wasn’t grand like the Capital. Nor was it as pretty to look at. But you still felt an ache within your chest as you stared down at it from your spot on top of a hill. You’d never left the city before, never had a reason to. And with the tall grass brushing against the exposed skin of your ankles beneath your dress, you felt a certain sadness that you never would have expected.

Shaking your head of the thoughts, you gave one last lingering look to the city and turned your back on it. On everything you had ever known. Hopefully Seokjin would take the note you’d left to be delivered without question. He knew you well, would more than likely believe the lie you wove about wanting to set off on an adventure. With luck, he wouldn’t worry.

But that was unlikely.

The sooner you found Taehyung and convinced him to undo whatever curse had been put upon you that you couldn’t remember, the sooner you could return home. If you survived, that was.

“I will.” You weren’t sure who you were trying to assure: yourself, or the miles of empty grassland around you.

The area beyond Market Chipping was mountainous, filled with tall hills and rocks that sprawled amongst the grass that you never saw within the city. You had a plan in mind, at least the base of one. And while you shuffled along as quickly as your aged body could move--which wasn’t very much at all--you tried to figure out how you were going to find a person who didn’t want to be found.

It was well known that Taehyung moved around alot, given his home of choice. But he’d been within the area yesterday morning, so that had to count for something, right? He couldn't have wandered off very far. At least that’s what you were aiming for.

You weren’t sure how long you’d been walking for. It was difficult to tell time when you didn’t have a watch on you. The only things you’d thought to bring with you was some food and a blanket stuffed into your bag. You’d packed light in hope of not needing to be gone long.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, you hadn’t come across another living being for hours. Not since you’d hitched a ride on the back of a farmer’s wagon up one of the trails. So you were bored, and incredibly exhausted. Such an old body got tired a lot quicker than you were used to. Despite that fact, you had to convince yourself to stop and take a break.

Which was exactly how you found yourself lying back in a spot on the grass, arms stretched out and eyes closed. You hadn’t meant to drift off to sleep, to take a nap right out in the open where anyone could find you. But your breath evened out before you realized it and the sounds of the wind brushing the grass lulled you to sleep.

Psh!

You awoke with a start.

Eyes shooting open, you mentally cursed yourself when you saw that the sun had set. Just how long had you been asleep for? And what, exactly, had woken you?

Slowly sitting up, you cast your gaze around the surroundings that you were able to see beneath the light of the full moon. There were no lanterns, no street lamps that far out into the wilderness, so you weren’t able to make out much.

Psh!

The high pitched whistle of steam had your head snapping to the right. Your eyes narrowed in an attempt to see with the lack of light to no avail. Holding your breath, you refused to move lest you miss whatever it was that you’d heard. Until movement caught your eye near the edge of one of the taller cliffsides.

“That’s convenient.” You mumbled, scrambling to your feet as quickly as you could. Perhaps your luck was beginning to turn around because right before you was the very thing that you’d been searching for.

The castle was huge, bigger than the tallest building in Market Chipping. But it didn’t look like a building, nor did it appear to be a castle. It was stuck somewhere in the middle, with a metal and steel structure that held itself together in a plethora of different shapes. Three legs stuck out of the bottom as it slowly propelled itself in your direction. And steam wafted from two gigantic metal chimneys at the stop of the monstrous castle.

Even though it must have been extremely heavy, the ground barely shook upon impact. And as it slowed to a stop a few meters away, you sucked in a deep breath. Maybe you were getting a little in over your head. Hell, it wasn’t too late to turn back and head home, even if you were in the body of an old woman. Surely that would be better than death at the hands of a dark wizard.

Right?

No, no. You couldn’t turn back now. You refused to be a coward. Besides, you’d think of it as karma from praying for an adventure so many times.

With a loud burst of steam, the castle lowered itself from its great, towering height and closer to the ground. Despite the darkness surrounding you, the door that led inside could be seen almost as clear as day. You took another deep breath. And shuffled forward.

When you came upon the three stepped porch that led up to the door, you grabbed onto the metal railing before you could doubt yourself again. Climbing stairs, even as little as three, was enough to leave you puffing for breath.

And as the heels of your shoes tapped across the wooden porch, and your hand reached out towards the doorknob, you grabbed on.

And swung the door open.

Tagging: @chimchimsauce @naajix @adoreyoukoo @ihaveakoreanseoul @btsarmysvtcarat @red--aren @micchikari @worldwidemochiguy @taebaelou @stardust-and-ashes @callmeyourstarrynight @ddaeng-whispers @kpopgirlbtssvt @byebyebycycle @busangloss @futuristicpinklemur @pjmlylyn @krystle1990 @parkchimchiminie @missseoulite @wannabesoftstanhaha​ @hxsxxk-180294 @leilalago​ @doodlesandthings​ @btsxarii​ @thedarkwinterrose​ @saxpam24​ @kawaiikiwithefruit​ @someonewhowannadielol​ @starrytae​ @lume0801​

[beautifulterriblequeen]

Trust No One: Aaravos as Plague

This is a messy and convoluted and branching set of headcanons and theories so I’m going to keep it to bullet points as much as possible. But if you ever want to know more about something on here, just ask!  My thanks to @kotikala​ for brainstorming with me for a few hours one night last week (and for making the gif below). It was a whole ride, and we had crazy amounts of fun.

It all started when I got to looking, yet again, at these two pix:

1000 years ago, the Sunfire and Moonshadow rulers held their own staffs

but 300 years ago, they had diversified into warrior and wizard

in the first pic, Aaravos’s eyes are glowing

in the second, the two staffbearer elves’ eyes are glowing

glowing eyes means using big magic

Aaravos’s eyes glowed when he was controlling Viren

so what’s he up to in the pic? Controlling someone else?

is that even Aaravos or do we just see his spooky astral form while he’s actually possessing some other poor elf there, like he did with the Sunfire mage at the Sunforge?

Theory: Aaravos hacks people with his magic. He’s is a hacker, and he can spread his influence from person to person this way, like a plague.

It’s what he did with the elves after Xadia was split.

It’s what he’s doing with Viren.

He’s going to keep using the same tricks.

It’s what Viren was trying to copy with a dark magic workaround.

And it’s what Aaravos is doing to others in the show already.

It’s what he did with the elves after Xadia was split

The most terrifying thing about Aaravos isn’t his powers. It’s that you never know who Aaravos is, so you don’t even know when his powers are being used. Who can you trust, when more than one person around you might be Aaravos, or Aaravos-manipulated?

Basically: TRUST NO ONE (ghhhh I love shows like this so much)

Aaravos sent a caterpillar to Viren because a worm is a type of virus

Dark Callum was an attempt to hack Callum’s mind while he was sick, and he was only saved because of Harrow’s influence on him

the plan to split Xadia interfered with Aaravos’s own plans, so he set about foiling the elves by hacking them and puppeting and/or impersonating them, and then making important decisions of state in disguise, by manipulation, and by creating an environment of isolation and mistrust

at some point, the elves finally realized what Aaravos was doing and had to band together to stop him

enter the Sunfires and the Moonshadows, defenders of the border and the peace, such as it was

the book pages involving Aaravos all show Sun, Moon, and Stars on them, but no other identifiable primal symbols

so what did they discover? Aaravos can turn into other people, using their primal magic, in perfect copies of them. The elves had no way to tell which among them were the OG elves and which were Aaravos

It’s what he’s doing with Viren

the pod that’s growing at the end of S3/in TTM has a black-eyed Viren inside it--eyes black like Aaravos. Yet the Viren we saw Claudia resurrect has normal skin. Maybe Aaravos stole Viren’s magic--and his gray skin with it--and plans to impersonate him, while Claudia resurrected Viren’s corpse using enough vitality to restore him to his original appearance after Aaravos pulled his magic out. Each of them only intended for there to be one Viren, but now there are two, because Claudia took a shortcut

the pod is the final step in copying a person, but it starts with the blood ritual, and the caterpillar needs primal magic to grow (see: Viren getting irradiated by the Sun staff and spitting out a much larger caterpillar than he swallowed)

that means it would be a lot easier to grow elves than humans, because they already have primal magic in them, and they’re in Xadia which is also full of primal magic. Aaravos had to lure Viren to Xadia to get the caterpillar to grow

not knowing who to trust among the ruling elven leaders changed things up

the elves split their rule, from having a single ruler who also wielded the primal stone staff to having two. 700 years after Xadia was divided, the Moonshadows are led by a mage and an assassin, and the Sunfires have a queen and a mage. That way, if one of them gets podded or possessed by Aaravos, they can’t make unilateral decisions and use their power or magic to create chaos

but not everyone Aaravos manipulates has to be a ruler. If he can whisper in a baker’s ear, or a servant’s, or a certain soldier at just the right time, that person can do the influencing on rulership for him. There are always myriad targets for Aaravos to choose from. How can the elves possibly protect their people?

cue the Sunfires and Moonshadows again, as basically the Order of the Phoenix--oh hey, Phoe-Phoe!

we saw what Queen Khessa did with the Sunforge, using it to attempt Viren’s murder. She’s probably killed other humans this way over the years. We see the device as cruel and the practice as racist.

but once upon a time (and this is what gives this theory some actual weight for me) the Sunforge could have been a tool of detection in a world of lies and deceit

the Sun arcanum is about revealing truth, just like Viren’s true face was revealed

300+ years ago, Queen Aditi used the Sunforge to test her fellow elves for truth or Aaravos-level deception. Any false pod elven pretenders who were placed in its scorching beam would be destroyed, while true elves who had not touched dark magic would not be harmed

the Sunforge was one of the only ways the elves could truly trust each other: they all had to submit to the bodyscan, just like in Among Us.

maybe the Moonshadow elves had to turn a bit KGB in this part of the story, using their stealth to sneak in and drag people out of bed in the night to take them to the Sunforge by dawn so they could be tested by Aditi

possibly Moonshadows were sent on pod hunts back in the day, to take out creepy pod people who weren’t finished growing--or who had become nothing but batteries for Aaravos’s schemes--a dark mercy either way, but very Moonshadow

but if the Sunforge was a detection device, the Wonderwall was a prevention device. A firewall, run on Moon power

Nyx said that the Wonderwall keeps out soulfangs and husks. Each of those is an unnatural creation: either too much soul or too little. Either way, the Wonderwall seems to let living things pass only if they have one soul and one body (that match, if it can detect that)

Aaravos couldn’t step in there inside another elf without getting burnt out of them

the oasis isn’t just a safe haven from the desert, it’s a safe haven from uncertainty and mistrust, the one place Moonshadows know they can trust someone to be who they seem, possibly used as a meeting spot to plan Aaravos’s capture, and maybe even execute it

Aaravos had to take Aditi out somehow - she ran the Sunforge and it was ruining his plans. The way he destroyed Khessa looked like he was burning her Sun magic out of her, and that’s super karmic not only because she was trying to kill Viren that way, but if that’s how Aditi ran the Sunforge the last time he knew her

He’s going to keep using the same tricks

the first place that Aaravos took Viren in Xadia was back to the Sunforge, to disable it. Now the Viren body he’s growing in his pod cannot be detected in the usual way, and he can go about doing whatever he wants. Except that Claudia totally resurrected OG Viren, so... Claudia actually becoming a problem for Aaravos? Hmm.

The next step should be the oasis then, since it’s specifically meant to keep out Aaravos’s puppets (a term used in the art book, and possibly meant literally as well as figuratively). He should be looking for a way to bring it down, which means more Moonshadows and Nyx

since we haven’t seen pod Viren hatch yet, I’m not sure whether Aaravos needs the original alive as a tether for his copy, or if he discards them like he did the Sun mage. Maybe he did want Claudia to resurrect Viren after all because he needs his life force to power pod VIren. Or maybe he was genuinely done with Viren because he had all the power he needed (ahaha Viren quote) to grow his own Viren, and it can live on its own now

It’s what Viren was trying to copy with a dark magic workaround

remember when the creators said in an interview about Harrow that yes, he’s dead, but that we would see him again?

maybe Viren was trying his darnedest to make that happen in S1

yes I’m back on my Dadbird bullshit okay, it’s a really fun theory, bless whoever came up with that one

here’s the new hot take: Viren did swap Pip and Harrow’s souls via the soulfang, and once he had Runaan imprisoned, he did indeed plan for the elf to “walk out of here” once he cooperated...as Harrow

in the novelization of S1, Viren used a black candle to aid in transferring Runaan into the coin, whereas the red candles are used for making smoky creatures come to life

in the show, there was a black candle in the dungeon cell on the table

That bowl of ash could be Harrow’s ashes, his DNA basically, Viren never throws anything away, too pragmatic

the second that Runaan gave up the goods on the mirror’s secrets, Viren would’ve “repaid his wise counsel” in a different way than he did for Lain and Tiadrin: by using Harrow’s ashes and the black soul-transfer candle to scoop Runaan’s soul out of his body, morph it into Harrow’s form using his DNA imprint from the ash, and then fetch Pip from the cage to put Harrow’s soul back in a body that looked exactly like his old one. Runaan’s body would’ve walked out of that cell, but it wouldn’t have looked like him anymore, and he wouldn’t have been inside it

looking at that mirror and knowing he was being watched by an elf who’d crawled inside other people and ridden them around Xadia must’ve been so freaking creepy, especially to a Moonshadow, no wonder Runaan got skeeved and called it worse than death--and he barely avoided the same fate himself, even if neither he nor Viren knew the connection

And this whole plan of hopping bodies and souls? It’s the dark magic version of what Aaravos does with his pod people, just like the coining spell is a dark magic version of how Aaravos is trapped

It’s what Aaravos is doing to others in the show already

once you realize that a character has the ability to flawlessly imitate other characters, all bets are off on who’s who

that goes for anyone else Aaravos might already be talking to in caterpillar form or possessing astrally, since he probably can’t make pods of people in Katolis due to a lack of primal magic

I started wondering if there was another poor person Aaravos was already puppeting in the background, and I found one: Saleer

in S2E1, Councilman Saleer advocates against retaliation in a council meeting and Viren isn’t pleased

what do you do with those who defy you to your face? You persuade them to join your side

in S3E1, Ezran’s banther just up and growls at Saleer, as if it can sense that something’s off about him, hmmm animal instincts

Saleer is the last to bend the knee to King Ezran

later in the same episode, Saleer reacts differently than everyone else to some surprising news, seeming to murmur about it toward his own right ear

at some point I think Wormavos bit Saleer, and he’s been puppeted by Aaravos ever since, just like the Sun mage was--except that Aaravos is keeping Saleer alive because he’s not done with him yet. This is extra scary because it means Aaravos could be controlling Viren, Saleer, and the Sun mage all at the same time, or be able to switch at will amongst them, a la Horde Prime or Ultron

Saleer orchestrates Viren’s release from the moment he hears that Rayla and Callum are taking the egg back to the Dragon Queen, but our eyes are usually on Viren so we don’t really notice that he initiates everything including working the crowd

basically every time other people are shocked, Saleer isn’t

when Viren does the Hearts of Cinder spell, Saleer moves to stand on his right to avoid getting bespelled

then back to back shots show that Aaravos replaces Saleer on Viren’s right. Even though Aaravos has 4 inches on Viren in height, he’s shown shorter than Viren

since the HoC spell takes place after the Sun mage’s possession and death, it seems Aaravos’s sudden appearance is a direct hint that Aaravos is currently possessing Saleer’s body like he did the Sun mage, and by inference has been for some time, what with all the calm collectedness and the smirking he’s been doing most of the season

Saleer survives the final battle unscathed and is arrested without anyone knowing of his connection to Aaravos or his extra connection to Viren. This raises the question: what will Saleer’s fate be in S4 and onward? Will he die mysteriously, abandoned now that he’s of no use? Will Aaravos keep using him to cause chaos in Katolis? Will anyone figure out that he is/was a puppet?

I sure hope Jonathan Holmes is having fun voicing his complicated messy evil guy with Jason Simpson! The boys deserve to have fun at work.

the fandom is contractually owed one (1) conversation between Barius and Runaan as balance now, I don’t make the rules

So, to sum up

Wormavos functions just like a worm virus, establishing itself in a host and then seeking out additional systems to infect via bite, and everyone that gets bitten becomes an at-will vessel for Aaravos to use, expanding his system exponentially

it’s impossible to tell who is under his control without extraordinarily powerful primal magic tests, which he’s disabling

he’s already spreading and no one knows he’s even there yet. Saleer might not be the only character Aaravos is operating, and we might not know who he gets a hold of in the future until it’s too late

in short, trust no one, and fix the Sunforge asap.

[invisibleinorange]

Chapters: 7/? Fandom: Bridgerton Rating: T Warnings: Presumed Character Death Relationships: Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington,  Eloise Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington(besties),  Bridgerton Family Dynamics, Simon Hastings/Daphne Bridgerton Characters: Colin Bridgerton,  Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton, Anthony Featherington,  Benedict Bridgerton,  Portia Featherington, Violet Bridgerton Additional Tags:  Bridgerton, Polin Summary:  Unexpected bad news arrives for the Bridgerton Family (and friends) regarding Colin's travels. This will be a series that is set after "The Duke and I" or season one of the show. It is a companion piece to "Goodbyes". (#I’mHereToKillYouAllWithFeels)

Furious didn’t begin to cover it. Penelope was practically shaking with rage as she made her way into the cool of night.   It was almost nice to feel something other than heartbreak though.

She couldn’t quite put a finger on who she was mad at. It was more a general anger that had been building up for some time.  The proposal had just been a triggered that sent it bubbling up.

She’d had to leave her home or she knew she would have done far worse than raise her voice or walk away from a proposal.  She had spent years dreading the moment she came of age to become part of society.

She’d been a particularly normal child and she knew that once upon a time her mother had treated her much the same she treated her other children.  Her sisters had always been naturally thin, perfectly average but she had always been softer.  Her mother had assumed she’d outgrow the baby fat but it never happened and the older she became, the more her mother saw fit to constantly insult her.

It was a nearly daily battle attack of her appearance and when it wasn’t that, it was something else.  At some point, she’d stopped thinking she’d ever amount to much of anything.  She never quite felt enough. Her mother had ensured as much. When her mother all but deemed her ineligible, she believed it to be true.

That was why she became skilled into camouflaging into walls.  If people didn’t notice her, they couldn’t hurt her.  Only part of her plan had worked.  The problem was that she did care.  She wanted to be the person who got asked to dance. She wanted someone to deliver her flowers. She wanted to be enough for someone.

She had been.

Her mind couldn’t quite believe the words that Colin had written her though. The last words he would ever write her.  There wouldn’t be any romance from Mister Bridgerton.

The fact that Benedict thought that he could just come, propose to her and everything was going to turn out okay was preposterous.

Sure, she knew he was a good guy. That wasn’t her problem though.

She’d spent half her life praying that one day she’d wake up and just be part of the Bridgerton family instead of her own.  She couldn’t do this though; She refused to accept a proposal borne of grief or sympathy.

She wouldn’t curse someone to the misfortunate of being stuck with her, especially when she knew that they weren’t in love with her nor she them.  Her mother would have found it foolhardy to even care about such things but for Penelope Featherington there was nothing more important.

Penelope wasn’t sure that anyone actually loved her. Even Colin had called her a friend.  She project her own feelings into his words a million times over but they didn’t make them his. She wouldn’t have believed them even if he uttered them to her.

That didn’t change the fact that Colin Bridgerton was the only man that she’d ever loved and in the depths of her heart, she wasn’t sure there was room for anyone else.

Colin had been there since he was a boy and even he would never be an old man, he’d be there in hers until her time came.

Perhaps that was why her feet carried her through the streets almost absently until she found herself pushing past a gate and into a darkened graveyard with an adjacent church.  It was almost eerie with the silence.

She made her path through the graves, not even stopping in her own family tomb where she knew her own father laid.  Instead she moved, not settling until she saw the Bridgerton name.  Without a body, Colin would never be placed there amongst his family members.

--

A gloved hand touched her back from behind and it was enough to startle her, made her turn in panic.  As childish as it was, she half expected to see a ghost. Instead she saw something far scarier: Violet Bridgerton.

The last time she’d seen the matriarch of the family, she’d been crumbling but the woman before her seemed back to her usual strength, though clearly sad.

“I apologize for startling you,” Violet said before her eyes seemed to access the situation and concern spread across her features.  “It’s not safe for a Lady such as yourself to be wandering after dark alone, improperly covered for the night.  You’ll freeze, My Dear.  What are you doing out here?”

“I – was,” Penelope stammered, mildly afraid and unable to really formulate an excuse in her head.  A part of her wondered just how much Violet knew of everything. She wasn’t about to ask.  Instead she recovered, nodded politely and said, “You’re unaccompanied yourself, Lady Bridgerton.”

“Violet, Dear,” she told her with a sad laugh, urging the informality. “I suppose that’s fair. I always sneak out when the children are distracted or asleep, especially when I wish to visit with their father.  I wasn’t aware he already had an audience tonight. Has he been much help?”

Penelope felt relief wash over her in a way.  She felt she had been let in on some really important adult secret.  She couldn’t help but wonder if any of Violet’s children knew about their mother’s habit.  There was something weirdly comforting in knowing that the woman still sought out her husband even though he’d been dead for so long.

Violet’s devotion to her husband was so endearing that Penelope couldn’t help but feel safe to speak openly.

“Sadly no,” Penelope told her.  “Though, I suppose the fact that you’re here could be an answer in itself. I’m sorry if I’m intruding on your time.”

Was this a sign?  Had Colin directed his mother here from Heaven to show her that even if he was gone it was okay to love him forever?

“It’s not an intrusion.  I’d be remiss to not side with you and say that this meeting was kismet,” the elder Bridgerton told her.  “Please unburden yourself on me.  My children think I’m so delicate that they’ve taken to keeping everything from me, forcing my convalesce instead of letting me attend to them and they’re the ones who need their mother most right now.”

Never in her life had she wanted Violet Bridgerton to be her mother more.

“Funny,” she started with a light smile. “They’re treating me much the same. Less mothering, more thinking I need to be … taken care of.”

“Do you not wish to be?” Violet asked, almost disregarding that there could possibly be more questions to ask before that for context. There was something in the look in her eyes that told Penelope that somehow the older woman knew far more than she was saying though.

“Not like this,” Penelope told her honestly.

“I take my role as mother very seriously. I’ve always known my children and the things that make them who they are.  I’ve known that you fancied my son for far longer than probably even you are aware. I’m also aware that of his many gifts, being quick on the uptake isn’t one of them,” Violet started in, leaving Penelope to awkwardly shift on her feet.  “Colin is – was – remarkable and I have no doubt he could have made you very happy but as his mother, I have to urge you to not miss out on life mourning him. Graveyards are lonely places to spend one’s time sneaking away to.”

“It’s not-“ Penelope started, wanting to protest a little and perhaps explain.

“No, you listen to me. When my Edmund died, the world ceased spinning on its axis. It took a considerable amount of time to find my footing again.  I had to learn to navigate life again. My children are who restored me. They healed me and every day I strive to heal them.  Grief doesn’t fade but you learn to live without those who leave you. My children are the living, breathing proof of a great love that exists only in my heart these days. They give my life meaning as they grow and begin their own lives. You must find what gives your life meaning. You do not have to let Colin go from your heart to leave room for others to enter it.”

“I don’t think anyone is exactly fighting for room in my heart,” Penelope finally managed to say. She still wasn’t completely sure how much her older companion knew. Would she be speaking to her in such a manner if she did.   “I don’t think I’m meant for a great love like yours. Not now.”

“Honestly Penelope Featherington!” Violet said with a motherly tick.  “You’re a delight. I’ve known you since the day your mother birthed you.  I won’t hear this because it’s simply not true. You were always destined for greatness. You’re just a caterpillar who hasn’t quite transformed into a butterfly yet.  Someone was always bound to see you for who you are.  I would have loved to have you as a daughter but even if you were never meant to be a Bridgerton, we’ll always be there to remind you of your worth. ”

[chesedelhim]

Other things abt seattle now that I am leaving:

- I DID see the ocean :) I didnt go to a beach but walked a bit (came out of the wrong zoo exit) and saw it :) I am filled with joy

- I saw so many animals at the zoo holy shit. I almost cried when I saw the wolves (lifelong fav animal) and i got so many pics. I bought a wolf plushie for me and a cookbook for my wife and a hoodie to share

- once u get outta downtown it looks like. Eerily similar to my hometown, I really like it. Everything is uphill both ways.

- yall werent wrong fuckin Everything is under construction here

- was anyone gonna tell me abt the like bridge thingys that go over the road that have. Short smooth looking trains on them bc that was cool as FUCK. I've never seen one of those

- 5th ave theater looks REALLY neat! I kinda liked the vibe of 5th ave in general, idk what's going on but theres some neat buildings

- I still do not understand why the buildings need to be so tall

- I've decided nobody in this city aside from the bus drivers (thank you bus drivers) knows how to drive but that's ok bc nobody at home knows how to drive either

- the stadium thing is the most intimidating building I've seen in my life!

- after watching some of the caterpillar busses navigate some of yalls narrower streets I have a great deal of respect for them and their drivers. I would love to take one someday.

- so I was up here for to get my tumor business sorted out and the sheer amount of confidence my doc had when explaining the procedure and exactly what would b done makes me SO fuckin confident in gettin this shit sorted. He doesnt even have to take some of my real bones out! He was able to figure out exactly where it was coming from just from lookin at my cat scan for 30 seconds and explained my exact risks and ways that those risks like, happened and I was just like. Wow. Bc u do NOT get this quality of care back home

- the sort of vaguely Corinthian and. Abstract/implication of waves on some of the street posts has me goin HAM it's such a neat design. I really love a lot of the architecture, I'd love to like. Properly take a gander at it one of these days, I saw a lot of stuff that I didnt get pics of but was like absolutely in love with.

- I saw like a double tiered bridge thingy with no like. Support cage on top which I've never seen before, most of the bridges I know have that sort of thing and it was neat! Also scary! How the fuck do yall feel like yaint gonna fall off

- tunnels tunnels tunnels tunnels the lighting in these makes me feel like I'm in silent hill

- I've played navigator this whole trip so guess who can read maps now (I could kinda do it before but I can REALLY do it now)

- I'm still rivals w the cascades on principle but I gotta admit it really does look like home. If I have to live anywhere else (gd forbid) I'd do it somewhere up here.

- I love looking at all the graffiti. Most of the stuff you see in my town is gang related, but people get ARTSY up here! Middle school me is losing aer shit.

- the sheer amount of art around the city has me beyond inspired rn. I've had just the Most artblock lately but between the outline of the mountains (VERY distinct from my own) to the nature immediately outside the city to the. Importance placed on the environment (seeing such a huge city being like NO BE NICE TO THE ENVIRONMENT OR 🔪 is VERY good ) to the actual like. works of art all over the place has me just swimming with ideas and concepts.

- I didnt see a ton of like, the sights or the local scenes but I'm coming back up in a bit to do the actual surgery and I'm totally beggin to stay for extra time to see as much as I can. This made me wish I could drive so I could do trips up here more often.

- I still dont really like the. I cant phrase this right other than theres too much of it, it's just a lot to process and a like. Huuuuge difference compared to my very rural way of living normally but it's also like....kinda way more anonymous and theres so much to DO and that's SO so interesting. I'd love to take like a camper van up here and just explore for weeks on end. I feel like with repeat trips I could genuinely get used to it, and I saw and heard abt a lot of stuff I'd love to check out.

- I wanna say BIG THANK YOU to the people who told me things about the city! I've got a bucket list now!! The info was helpful and had me goin 👀👀 at a whole bunch of stuff that I Definitely wanna do at some point

- I'm absolutely gonna have more to add to this post later once I process everything and dont have a headache lmao

[thatguywiththecoydog]

Anpanman: Apple Boy and Everyone's Hope (2014)

Introduction

Fox's primary free-to-use streaming service, Tubi, had announced that they would be picking up at least 10 of the Anpanman movies to be released in English and Spanish back last October, with them slated for a fall 2020 release. This never happened, so many fans of the Anpanman franchise that spoke native English or Spanish would have to wait a little longer for dubs of these movies to come out.

The delay of these movie dubs went unannounced, leading fans to speculate that the dub was either in limbo or just silently canceled. This was until the first of them was released on April 15, 2021, with no announcement, or even complete details on who is dubbing them or the cast list. This had fans believing for a short while that the dub had taken a bit longer to assure its quality, but as you will soon read, this was most likely not the case.

Naturally, fans were excited as this was the first time these movies would see an official dubbed release in the west. There were other dubs of the franchise in English and Spanish, such as an English dub of the television series made for India that aired on Pogo, and a Spanish made in Spain sometime in the 1990s. However, these dubs are hard to come by and there are no official ways to watch these dubs in North America, as far as I'm aware.

Promo for the Indian Pogo dub posted by @doraedoramichan2021 on YouTube: https://youtu.be/oxAx5EEdX_4

So now we have an official dub of one of the movies that can be watched at no charge with ads. Joy!

Plot synopsis (spoilers below)

The plot starts with Dokin (spelled as "Dokeen" in the dub) and Horrorman (dubbed as "Horror") as they read a book of fairy tales, landing on Snow White. They end up accidentally releasing a shadowy figure from the book as it flies off into the darkness.

Meanwhile, Melonpanna's and Creampanda's (spelled "Cream Panda" in the dub) class are making sketches of the ocean. This is where Baikinman comes in to cause trouble for them with his giant crab robot. Anpanman rushes in from the blue to beat the tar out of Baikinman to save the day as the theme song plays in the background.

After that, we cut to the movie's other titular character, Apple Boy, attempting to fly his hot air balloon over the ocean. After the balloon falls to the ocean, he is swept away by the current.

A whale finds him dehydrated and floating lifeless in the ocean, where he gives him to Anpanman so he can help. After offering a piece of his anpan head to Apple Boy, he takes him to Uncle Jam's bakery, where Uncle Jam and Batako let him stay while they wait for a new shipment of apples from SL-Man.

Back at Baikinman's lair, he discovers that the book of fairy tales was being read by Dokeen and Horror. Looking very worried, he explains to the two of them that he was told never to open that book.

Anpanman, Melonpanna, and Cream Panda find SL-Man with the apples, Baikinman comes by to ruin the apples with his giant caterpillar robot. After Anpanman slows him down, Melonpanna and Cream Panda take SL-Man to the bakery.

Uncle Jam and Batako receive the apples and make them into apple juice. They give the juice to Apple Boy which he quickly drinks and rejuvenates from.

As Anpanman is still fighting Baikinman, Melonpanna and Cream Panda come back with Apple Boy for assistance. Apple Boy ends up beating him by planting an instantly-growing apple seed on the robot's tongue, where Anpanman then punches him into the next time zone.

That evening at the bakery, Apple Boy explains to the crew, with Shokupanman (dubbed as Bread-head Man) and Currypanman there as well, that he needs his balloon to search for the fabled magic apple seeds that can apparently grow the biggest apples anyone has ever seen. Anpanman, Mellonpanna, and Cream Panda help him search for the tree that gives off the magic seeds, while Bread-head Man and Currypanman search for the Apple Balloon. With no luck in finding the tree, they return to the bakery.

As the heroes in the bakery are setting off to find Appleina, an apple girl who might have clues as to where one can find the magic seeds, Horror informs Baikinman and Dokeen of the whole situation through a mock TV newscast.

Once at Appleina's, she shows the crew (and by extension the young audience this movie caters to) how to grow large apples. After many hardships of growing the trees, they finally blossom. Just as they are admiring their hard work, a bunch of bats swoop in and suck the life out of all the other apple trees around them. Unrelated to this, Baikinman attempts to steal all the apples for himself.

At this point, the bats go together to form the wich from the Snow White book that Dokeen and Horror were reading at the beginning of the film, revealing that she was the shadowy figure at the beginning of the movie that escaped from the book.

The witch turns everyone into moldy apples for no other reason than she is evil. The only ones left standing are Apple Boy and Appleina. Uncle Jam and Batako rush to bake Anpanman a new anpan head so he can turn back from apple form and be powered up enough to beat the witch. However, the witch destroys the Anpanman Blimp's oven, meaning they can't bake the head. Apple Boy stuns the witch with the power of a magic apple that he ended up growing. This also bakes the cold head into a perfectly cooked one, giving Uncle Jam and Batako the chance to turn Anpanman back to normal.

They successfully do this and Anpanman beats the witch back into the storybook, as the movie ends and everyone sings about apples.

My opinions

Before you say it, I am fully aware this movie is made for young children, but that is no excuse not to have a quality movie in my opinion. If anything, kids deserve more good content so they can learn and remember seeing that content for years to come. It just makes me feel bad for these children who watch movies that don't have much substance purely because they are "made for children."

The movie itself

The movie is average at best, and boring at worst. I did type out a pretty large plot synopsis for this movie, making it sound like a lot, but there really was not as much as you would think. This movie is only 46 minutes in total too, so there really should have been more here. Like, there was some emotional stuff going on with Apple Boy back on the Apple Planet he came from, but it's never really relevant to the story, nor the series as a whole because of him being made for this movie and only this movie. The movie also has a surprising amount of filler. Like, the part where I briefly mention Anpanman looking for the tree is a montage in the movie that lasts about two minutes, along with a scene where Apple Boy falls off a cliff, which is also not relevant to the main plot. I want to say a good quarter of this movie in total was filler, so we only have about 33 minutes of actual plot.

The writing that is there is also broken. I believe that the most entertaining part about this series is the series villains, Baikinman, Dokeen, and Horror. They don't make too many appearances in this movie to serve as comic relief, rather, Baikinman feels shoved in here to serve as more padding to make that over-40-minute time slot. There are also parts of the movie that make absolutely no sense under any perspective, not just an outsider's. Like, why does giving Anpanman a new head suddenly transform him from a moldy apple back to normal?

Overall, I feel as though both adults and children would be bored to death by this movie. 3/10.

Dubbing quality

If the movie itself wasn't soleless enough, the dubbing somehow makes this worse.

The movie was dubbed by Macias Group, a Florida-based studio that is best known for dubbing English shows into Spanish but does have some English dubbing in their catalog.

They had hired voice actors that I have not even heard of, nor do I think anyone else has. This doesn't make the dubbing automatically bad, in fact, a no-name cast can be quite good if given the right direction. However, this cast I feel did not give enough life to the characters. Some characters sound fine, like Horror or Dokeen, but others sound like the actor is struggling to put on a good performance, like Baikinman.

The characters also tend to speak in a way I like to call "Dora the Explorer Syndrome." It's kind of hard to explain what this is over text, but characters will talk extremely slowly for the young children, along with sounding considerably condescending. Watch the first two minutes of a Dora episode and compare it to this movie and you'll hear what I mean.

The voice acting itself sounds a bit bland and flat, almost like the actors didn't really care for their roles and were just doing it for a small paycheck. I don't blame them, really. An obscure series that they most likely haven't even heard of streaming exclusively on an unpopular streaming service most likely won't pay too high certainly wouldn't get me motivated. To do something like this, it needs to pay high enough or be on a service where it will get more notoriety, and most importantly, the people need to have a passion for the project and voice acting in general, neither of which sounded like they were here. I also heard a bit of recording echo, but I'm going to chalk that up to the actors recording at home rather than a booth due to COVID restrictions. If the dub had a bit more heart, then I probably would have liked it that much more.

I feel as though some of the name changes could have been better. Like some were unnecessary like Dokin to Dokeen or Horrorman to Horror, but things like Baikinman and Anpanman were kept the same, which probably needed the most explanation to an English audience.

The iconic songs from the Japanese version were also translated to English, which is a rarity in 2021 dubbing land. However, the songs sound off from their Japanese counterparts. If you were to listen to the theme song (https://youtu.be/3qSiSWTJkzw) or the closing song (https://youtu.be/c4DY7xmLlQI), you hear that they are bouncy, happy, and catchy. The English versions sound a bit off-beat to the rhythm these songs are supposed to be in. Now, I don't mind if the rhythm is a bit different so it can be optimized to the English language better, but here, it's so off it makes the songs sound worse. Most likely, the singers were given no direction and only listened to the Japanese version a few times. Not only that, but the lyrics are nearly directly translated from Japanese, also messing with the flow of the songs. When listening to the Japanese musical tracks, it almost makes you wonder what could have been.

Overall, the dubbing is not too good and probably could have done better either with a different cast with more motivation, or a whole 'nother studio behind the wheel.

Final thoughts and other recommendations

If you do want another English dub of Anpanman that I think is miles better, watch the fandub by Thomas Blue on Fandubbers Unite, starring myself as Anpanman (renamed to Bean-bun Man) and @clwsblog as Baikinman (renamed to Cavity Creep). It has better writing, better acting, and better songs. Both kids and adults alike will enjoy this version. Before you ask me, no, there is no bias here. I truly believe we did it better and for no pay!

Here is a link to Thomas Blue's dub:

https://fandubbersunite.weebly.com/beanbunman.html

If you really want to watch the official English though, even after my warnings, then go ahead. Here's a link to the Tubi listing:

https://tubitv.com/movies/592033/anpanman-apple-boy-and-everyone-s-hope?start=true

[iicytodoroki]

𝐴𝑘𝑎𝑖 𝑇𝑎𝑖𝑐ℎ𝑖𝑎𝑜𝑖 - 𝑊𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐴𝑈! 𝐾𝑎𝑔𝑒𝑦𝑎𝑚𝑎 𝑇𝑜𝑏𝑖𝑜

𝘼𝙠𝙖𝙞 𝙏𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙖𝙤𝙞 𝙈𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

𝐀𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐖𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝐑𝐞𝐝 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬! 𝐊𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐲𝐚𝐦𝐚 𝐓𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐨

Prologue > Chapter One - Who are you?  > Chapter Two

 A/N: asdfghk i totally forgot the title is what the caterpillar says over and over, but tbh i never liked that character so we ain’t having that lol also sorry its been awhile but i made it longer! (also if you are the few and want a taglist just msg me!) hope you enjoy~

Heavy breaths and branches hitting yn’s cheeks. The white-haired man just seems to be running even faster. When yn tried to follow him through a dense set of trees, she lost sight of him. 

“How...is he,” yn huffed, “so fast?”

As yn was trying to catch her breathe while having her hands on her knees in the now darker forest, another wondrous creature seemed to have caught her in their vision. 

“Well hello there, what’s a cutie doing out here in these parts all alone,” the man asked with a mischievous grin. 

Startled, yn shot her head up and looked around her. Swiveling her head left and right, yn feels a soft, fluffy appendage hold her chin, putting a stop to her head.

“Up here~,” the man cooed as he gestured to yn’s face to look up on the tree branch above her. 

Sitting there was a tall man with black shorts and a long-sleeved shirt with thin red stripes going horizontally. Behind him was his peculiar black tail, and sitting atop his bed-head were cat-like ears. His eyes peered into yn as she continued to stay silent and his grin just grew wider. 

Jumping down from his branch, the man approached yn who was still in shock and fear.

“I know I must be breath-taking,” he spited, “but I need to know...who are you?”

Stopping right in front of yn and bending down towards her face, she finally snapped out of her dazed and attempted to take several steps back. Before she could get any farther, the man’s tail went behind her at the small of her back and stopped her movements. Now a little irritated, he repeated his question, “Who are you?” with the raise of his brow.  

Red in the face with the inappropriate proximity of the man, yn stuttered out, “My n-name is yn.” 

Satisfied with her answer, the man grinned to himself. But unfortunately for yn, he still didn’t move away nor introduced himself. Yn was able to muster enough courage after what seems to be several minutes of staring at one another to ask him , “And you are…?”

Proud of being asked who he is, he removed his tail from behind her and gave a flashy grin with, “Ah my name’s Testuro Kuroo, but you can call me Testuro.”

“Um no it’s fine, Kuroo is fine for me,” replied yn. Yn was still used to her customs back home, so she still preferred calling strangers by their last name. Finally having her emotions calmed down, yn took in her surroundings. 

It looked like she was deeper into the forest and no silver-haired man in sight. Flashing, neon signs point all over the place. Confusing arrows saying the “land of the skulks” pointing upwards while the “parliament” is pointing to its left. 

More confused than ever, Yn asked Kuroo, “Um, have you by chance seen a man with silver-hair running through here?”

Kuroo looked to the side in thought for a few moments before a cheshire grin appeared on his face.

“Mmm, who knows,” he amusingly questioned. “But I know a few mad people who might,” he suggested. 

Mad…? Yn thought and did not like the sound of that. 

“Uh, I think that will be unnecessary,” yn timidly said. 

“Suit yourself, but just be aware there’s many,” Kuroo paused creepily “things out here waiting to see a newcomer in these woods.”

Kuroo turned around and shrugged nonchalantly, “But you seem like you can follow the signs…”

Yn looked at all the confusing directions around her and began to worry even more. 

As Kuroo was taking his first few steps, yn called out, “Wait! If you could please take me to those people who could know where the man is--”

Before she could finish her plea, Kuroo was next to her and his softail curling around her sides.

“Sure thing kitten,” he said slyly.

Although yn was unsure of Kuroo’s character, he was actually a person who was pretty comforting. During their walk through the woods, they heard many odd coos and rustling which shook yn. If there's all these beautiful creatures, then there’s also an equal amount of unimaginable scary one as well, she thought. However, each time, Kuroo tried to ask her questions of where she came from and how she got into his world. His soothing and calm tone was able to distract yn from the lurkers in the darkest parts of the woods.

Eventually, there was a clearing up ahead. An old mill and colorful homes could be seen across the plain. Kuroo walked a few steps ahead with an excited air around him. 

As the two got closer to the run-down structures, they see a long pastel-cloth table swarmed in old tea cups and pots. At the head of the table directly across from them was a man with wavy orange hair, on top was a cute top hat for his size. The tangerine man was jumping around while speaking to a blonde, beanpole of a guy in glasses who seems to be worn out from the suspected tea consumption or the energy of the shorter guy or both…

When yn looked closer, she saw flattened bunny ears as he tried to hide further into his folded arms on the table. 

“Wow would you look at this,” said Kuroo as he walked closer to the duo. Yn stood at the end of the table, unsure of presenting herself to the strange group. 

At the sound of Kuroo’s voice, the orange-hair man quickly turned his head to look at Kuroo.

“Ah! Welcome back Kuroo! Come, come, come join us for some freshly brewed tea,” he tried to usher the taller man but Kuroo declined.

“No thank you, you put too much sugar in your batches anyways,” he replied, “but I’m here to ask help for a new friend,” gesturing to yn’s direction. Yn tensed up when she heard this. 

The orange-haired guy immediately perked up at the sight of a new friend and dragged her to sit at the head of the table. He introduced himself as Shouyo Hinata and the sleeping bunny as Kei Tsukkishima. Tsukkishima peaked through his arms to catch a glimpse of yn and sat up, begrudgingly so. 

“And last but not least is Tadashi Yamaguchi!” Hinata exclaimed as he pulled up one side of the tablecloth to present a sleeping Yamaguchi, who was presumably knocked out from the tea and Hinata himself. Hinata was able to get the fellow up sitting on the chair, which awakened him. Now yn was able to see the cute mouse ears atop his dark green hair.

Yamaguchi provided a sleepily “Hello,” as he proceeded to make himself a cup of tea. 

Kuroo sat at the other end of the table in front of yn with his feet up the table and Hinata took the corner seat beside yn. With everyone now settled, Kuroo proceeded to say, “As I said before, Yn is looking for a white-haired pocket watch guy and I think we all know who he is…”

“OH! I think I know!” Hinata said with a teacup raised in the air. “Is it….Koushi Sugawara?”

“I’m pretty sure it is,” Tsukkishima said and Yamaguchi nodded with him.

“Who is Koushi Sugawara?” Yn questioned.

Yn brought her cup of tea but before her lips touched it, she noticed there was a chipped edge and had to turn her cup to the other side. Tsukkishima spoke up and yn made eye contact with him peering over her cup. 

“He’s the assistant for the King of the Court,” he said in distaste. 

“King of the Court?” she questioned.

“King Tobio Kageyama of the Red Hearts in Karasuno,” piped Yamaguchi, “He’s known to be cold and temperamental.”

I do not like the sound of that, yn thought to herself. 

Kuroo who was silently listening with his eyes closed finally spoke up, “Sweet yn here needs to return a belonging of that white rabbit.” 

Hinata, hearing this, immediately stood up in excitement, “A lost item? How humble of you!” Hinata approached yn radiating in excitement, “And we can take you too! We have been meaning to visit our friends in Karasuno!”

Overwhelmed a bit, yn just stared at the sunshine boy with widened eyes. 

“Unless the King finds you and throws you in jail,” interrupted Tsukkishima.

“It won't be too much of a problem if we’re careful Tsukki,” Yamaguchi pleaded, “We know the place enough and Yn will surely get captured if she goes by herself.”

“Wait a minute,” Yn cut it, “won’t you be joining us Kuroo?”

“Hmm? No, I got places to,” he peered at yn with a smirk, “lurk in.”

Yn knew she was not going with Kuroo and he knew the same. Yn also knew she had no other way to find Sugawara without getting into trouble and these guys seem to be pretty nice enough to guide her. Also, she was starting to warm up to the ball of sunshine and the other two who seemed reliable enough. 

“Ok, I will be very grateful if you guys can guide me to Karasuno,” yn asked. 

“Great! Well then off we go!” Hinata shouted as he looped his arm with yn and dragged her forward. 

Yamaguchi waited for Tsukkishima to get up from his seat. He seemingly got up not wanting to go, but he had a small smile when looking at yn and Hinata chattering off. 

“Take care, yn,” Kuroo saluted before he disappeared into the shadows of the forest.

Well this is an odd adventure but these guys seem to be friendly enough, thought yn as she smiled with her three new friends by her side.

taglist: @melanieacademy 

[ganymedesclock]

Do you have any headcanons for pk before he found hallownest and his new/current form?

Boy anon, do I.

So it’s worth noting that Hollow Knight, as a game, has several interesting repeated thematic motifs. The ruined nest is one of them, introduced repeatedly with things like the resting place of the Baldur Shell, the Stag Nest, and the lair of the Brooding Mawlek. Given the, well, animalistic qualities that are retained by the insectoid “humans” of this setting, this smoothly transitions from depictions of wild animals to villages and towns (the Stag Nest itself, but also Dirtmouth, the City of Tears, Deepnest… we see few settlements that are not in a state of decline or ruin)

This is interesting when Hallownest is literally named, well, “Holy Nest”- and PK was quite clearly obsessed with the idea that it would be the greatest, the most sacred, the impeccable, that which would never be destroyed. And we see this obsession in the context that this ostensible impossible destruction came to pass anyway.

Bardoon- the main NPC who tells us about the wyrms- also implies they are dwindling in number, if not outright extinct. His comment on the dead body at Kingdom’s Edge is “with its like gone, the world is smaller.” So at least in this part of the world, wyrms are seemingly extinct, or all ‘passed on to other forms’ in a context where this is not treated as the evolution from a caterpillar to a butterfly.

It is also worth noting PK is… not really shown to be a liar. He is not necessarily shown to be forthcoming with information (Ogrim notes there were other vessels that PK didn’t tell him about, but, he is also not shocked or suggests that he was reassured there were not other vessels) but we don’t see him say things that are directly false as much as, as much as any other narrator in the game, he shows his bias.

This is interesting, because there is one time we find something PK wrote that is actively false, and it’s about the lands beyond the kingdom- the place PK was almost certainly born, and spent some amount of time before Hallownest:

These blasted plains stretch never-ending. There is no world beyond.Those foolish enough to traverse this void must pay the toll and relinquish the precious mind this kingdom grants.

Here’s the thing: even without Silksong coming out showing us that Pharloom exists, as another kingdom beyond Hallownest, Hollow Knight on its own is littered with people who came from somewhere else. Zote, in City of Tears, brags about how he’s seen far more impressive towers than these. Whether or not the towers were that cool is up for debate- but Zote probably didn’t just lie about the fact that buildings exist in places other than Hallownest. Cornifer and Iselda, while young according to Elderbug, are both grown adults and matured and lived among others before coming to Dirtmouth, and Iselda mentioning she thought it was a temporary stop suggests she was of the impression they would keep traveling onto another town.

Tiso and Cloth both came to Hallownest from other places. Quirrel and Ghost, while both returning to it from afar, still spent time out there and in Quirrel’s case we know for certain he met other people.

So PK, who we don’t have a lot of examples of him knowingly lying… is totally wrong about the void. Which seems stupid, because he’d have been out there. He’d have presumably seen people. Someone, somewhere, had to have interacted with a wyrm enough to realize they have powers of foresight, right? If it’s an attempt at propaganda, it’d be a poor one, because Ogrim- one of PK’s top enforcers- openly talks to Ghost about the idea that other people came to Hallownest and settled there, with PK’s sanction, from lands beyond. Hell, PK and his capital city openly bartered with the weavers of Deepnest- who came from Pharloom!

So, if it’s not a deliberate falsehood, what is PK’s statement at the Howling Cliffs?

It’d seemingly suggest a bias. That if PK looks back at his experiences beyond the kingdom, he saw it as a meaningless void, full of mindless creatures. Which makes a bit of sense, if we consider the size of the cast-off shell; the Pale Wyrm was enormous. Compared even to a prodigiously sized being like Bardoon, he is “too small” to be a wyrm.

Existing at this sort of scale, it would be extremely difficult- if he even had the faculties such as a larynx or some form of telepathy- to talk to anyone. Something Bardoon’s size, maybe- but the vast majority of NPCs in the game are nowhere near Bardoon’s size. Most creatures are around the height of Elderbug, who isn’t even half the length of one of PK’s mandibles. And, speaking of Elderbug, it’d be pretty hard not to blame people for not, falling over themselves to talk to a Wyrm.

Especially because we are never told for sure that wyrms, uh, aren’t carnivorous. And a lot of creatures in this setting are.

The thing is though, if PK genuinely has a nihilistic perspective of the world and people because he spent a formative chunk of his youth isolated by virtue of being a godzilla-tier giant monster, this would tell us something interesting:

That PK didn’t have other wyrms around.

There’s more evidence in favor of this, too- the only name this entity is ever called besides “the king” or variants thereof is “the wyrm”. The. Singular. When anyone in Hallownest says “wyrm” they are referring to PK. There is a single mention of a “blackwyrm” by Ogrim in the White Defender’s journal entity, which is not elaborated upon, which would imply pretty strongly, if it was only relevant for a single battle, the blackwyrm, whatever it is, is probably dead; it is definitely out of the picture somehow.

PK does not have a personal name that would distinguish him from other wyrms; the only other wyrm we hear of is distinguished merely by color, which would suggest the “personal” part of his name is “Pale”- he’s the Pale Wyrm, as opposed to the Black Wyrm. Which is not much of a self-descriptor. It is the way wasteland wanderers might identify the wyrms- by whether the creature moving at the edge of their vision is a mountain of white flesh, or gray, or black, or red.

Wyrms do not seem to have much of an interrelated culture. If there’s any quality they are implied to share, it is seeking out and building kingdoms, luring bugs to them, which would suggest however their population goes, they have a tendency to be drawn towards other creatures, not each other.

This is fun, when it’s worth noting we don’t know how long the Pale Wyrm existed before Hallownest. He doesn’t imply he was doing anything he saw as important or valuable out there. If he sees it as a mindless environment, that might well suggest that he himself was basically operating on raw survival instinct- his concerns were eat, sleep, dig, look for more advantageous places to do those things. So he’d have no real reason to delay if he got it in his head he was going to do or be anything else.

Which could mean he was, at least by the standards of his kind, fairly young and inexperienced upon destroying himself to create the Cast-Off Shell. We can’t compare his shell to any other wyrms, because we have no other wyrms. He may not have even been fully grown.

This is something that came up in A Pale Stranger, and influenced my writing of PK there- that I personally read him as having been a very young entity. Even if he may have spent centuries in the windswept desert between kingdoms, he didn’t learn very much or become particularly worldly. He was not educated by others of his kind, and he did not form connections with smaller creatures.

So, Radiance, indignity of indignities, was more or less dethroned from her position by a punk teenager. I also personally like this read because it leads me to the idea that early-Hallownest and pre-Hallownest PK was at a point in his life where he actually had a lot in common with Ghost at the beginning of the game- a peculiar, unsettling stranger, but not necessarily a malicious one, figuring out what they are and what the world they’ve found themselves in is. Especially to the idea that this would come with an unhelpful inclination towards predation, because, what does “a large animal” do when it’s threatened or confronted, or even just trying to make sense of something? Attack it, usually. 

But I also basically run on the headcanon- with the destroyed nests- that PK is functionally an orphan, whether this is simply the usual way wyrms operate or something unusual happened to him, he’s barely at best ever run into others of his species, and those encounters happened after he rejected that part of himself. And this kinda, creates some problems, because it means he basically has no model that isn’t trial-and-error self-assembled for what he even is.

[joyofcrime-elinorhigh]

 Hello everybody, my name is JoyofCrimeArt, and legacy can be an fascinating thing in regard to animation. Since cartoons are made with the intent of being seen years or even decades after they're created, it can be interesting to see how the general consensus people have about a series can change over time. One day you can be on top of the world, and your series is loved by critics and audiences alike. But then, something happens. Sometimes it's a specific episode. Other times a season. Maybe it's a controversy within the fandom. But whatever it is, something happens that causes peoples opinions to turn. And suddenly your show has gone from being universally praised to becoming much more divisive. And when something like that happens, it can be hard to recover. It happened to Steven Universe.  It happened to Rick and Morty. And it happened to Star vs. the Forces of Evil.

 Created by Daron Nefcy,  Star vs. The Forces of Evil  premiered on the Disney Channel and Disney XD in 2015,  and quickly became one of the hot cartoons that everybody was talking about. It makes sense, as it came outright around the time where more continuity based fantasy series were really starting to take off, so it's natural that it became a hit. While the series was generally well regarded upon its debut, as time went on the series became much more of a "love it or hate it" type of show. And while that's not too uncommon for any show that amounts a large flowing, what makes Star vs. so interesting is that it seems like nobody can seemingly agree when the show got bad, if it did at all. Some people say the quality dipped after the first season. Others say the third. Some say the fourth. Others say that the show was good until the finale. And some say that the show was solid throughout. This divide among fans is why I feel confident calling Star vs. The Forces of Evil one of the most divisive shows of the 2010's, even if the debate around it isn't nearly volatile as other series. But now that the series has ran its course I have to ask, does it hold up? Did the show really go down hill, or is the hate undeserved? That's what I'm here to find out.

 I feel like I'm in an interesting place to talk about this series because, while I tend to try to keep up with all the big name animated show coming out, I actually didn't watch most of Star as it was running. I watched the first season until my family cut cable right before the finale of season one (You know, around the time people started to care about the show.) And only caught up with the show in the last year or so while doing research for my "Top 30 Cartoons of the Decade" list. So I went into the series mostly blind with the exception of a few spoilers. I just felt like this was important to point out as I feel it may have an effect on my view of the show.

 Also, while I usually try to go spoiler free when I do a general overview of a series, for this review I may have to go into some spoiler territory. Since this series features an ever changing status quo, as well as a lot of major characters who aren't introduced until late in the series' run, doing this review completely spoiler free would be difficult. So I'm going to be doing this review under the assumption that anybody reading this has already seen the show, and are just curious to hear my take on it, or don't care about being spoiled.  So if you wanna go in blind I suggest you sign out now.

 But to everyone else, let's dive in and talk about Star vs. the Forces of Evil.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hJ5ecrpp8k

 Star vs. The Forces of Evil stars (He, get it. I'm funny.) Star Butterfly. A princess from the dimension of Mewni who, upon her fourteenth birthday is given a wand of unbelievable magical power. However, after causing nothing but trouble with her new found powers in her world her parents decide to ship her off to Earth, where she can be somebody else's problem. There she befriends a human boy named Marco Diaz and the series mainly follow these two as they go on all sorts of magical adventures as they battle all sorts of evil monsters and ne'er-do-well who want to take the wand and use its power for themselves. Or at least that's how the series goes at first. As the series goes on it begins to focus more on the world building, as Star and Marco discover that the kingdom of Mewni isn't as great as they first believed, and are forced to battle political corruption, conspiracy within the royal family, and the generation spanning systemic racism against monster kind.  

 The best place to start when talking about the show are the characters. Lets start with the main leads.

 We got Star, your typical fun-loving, ditzy, hyperactive action girl. Which seems to be a common trend in Disney Channel cartoons now that I think about it. But she does enough to stand on her own. She's a fun character, and an overall good lead for the series. I admit that her bratty nature and general stupidity could turn some people off, and there are times  where it can get a little annoying, but I never minded it all that much. I think that's kinda suppose to be the point of her character. She's a royal, and spent her whole life with a silver spoon in her mouth. So it makes sense she would be a bit selfish and be unaware of the world around her. And she does improve over the course of the series, as she begins to take her job as a princess more seriously and spends much of the series actively fighting against monster prejudice. Though I'd be lying if some of these less desirable elements of her character don't continue to pop up every now and again, even later in the series and especially in the last couple of episodes. Also she's kinda a sociopath. Like especially early on in the show there are like...a lot of casualties to Star's antics. I'm kinda surprised Disney let them get away with that.

 Also, can I just say that I am sick and tired of people asking "When is Disney going to include their first LGBTQ+ princess, completely ignoring the fact that Star is bisexual as fu*k. Like, come on now!

 Marco is also a good lead. He's a neurotic, responsible, karate student who often acts as the straight man to Star's antics. However, I like the fact that he's not a total stick in the mud. Sure he's more cautious than Star is but he's still capable of getting in on the adventures as well. He comes across as a realistic teen with his own set of flaws. Namely his insecure nature and general social awkwardness. I also like that due to his expertise with karate he's able to hold his own in a fight even without magic. He always feels like Star's equal and never like a sidekick. He and Star have a great dynamic in general, and the two play off each other well. They contrast with each other and It feels like the two really cover each other's flaws. And it's kinda refreshing seeing two characters who are so different manage to genuinely get along with each other.  

 But of course, we also have the forces of evil that the shows title so clearly mentioned. Each season focuses on a different villain, and something that I really like is how all four major villains are introduced relatively early on. So the show doesn't suffer from that "Dragon Ball Z" type thing where it's like "Haha! I know you just defeated the villain, but now's there's an even BIGGER villain who we just haven't happened to mention until now!" They've always around in the world, and many of them even start out as joke villains only to become more serious later down the line. And they manage to do that in a way that feels very believable.

 The best example of this is the shows first villain, Ludo. Who upon introduction is portrayed as a completely comedic villain who Star could easily take in a fight. But things change when a new more serious villain, Toffee, usurps him as the season one antagonist. Stealing his castle and army in the process. Come season two and Ludo is left alone, having lost everything, and is forced to toughen up in order to get back what he once had. He builds a new army, stronger than his first. He finds a new castle to form his base in, and becomes a genuine threat to our cast. Scrappy underdogs villains who lost everything might be one of my favorite tropes in fiction. Other examples of this trope used effectively would be Peridot in Steven Universe and Jamack in Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeast. However, while those shows use this trope as an opportunity to have these villains go through a redemption arc, Star goes the other way and uses it as an opportunity to make a character become more of a threat. That said, he never loses the comedic charm that made his fun to watch in the first place. Part of me honestly kinda wish that Ludo stayed the main villain of season two, instead of being usurped Toffee yet again. That said, the episode "Princess Quasar Caterpillar and the Magic Bell" does a good job giving his arc a satisfying conclusion.

 Speaking of antagonist, let's talk about Tom Lucitor. Star's demon ex-boyfriend. While not a season spanning villain like Ludo or Toffee, he has several appearances early on as a recurring antagonist only to go down the more traditional "redemption arc" route later on. And I just want to say upfront, Tom is one of my favorite characters. Not in the show, but in fiction in general. It would of been so easy to make Tom your generic "toxic boyfriend" arch-type but even early on it's made clear that even though he's an antagonist, he isn't pure evil. His love for Star is genuine, but the problem is that he hasn't earned it. He tries to improve himself and become a better person but his own anger issues and jealousy keeps getting in the way. Specifically jealousy of Marco because he seems him as a romantic threat. But as time goes on, he does become better. He learns that he and Marco have a lot in common and eventually accepts that he can't make Star love him, and lets her have her space. And that, ironically, causes Star to becoming willing to open up to him again. They become friends and eventually get back together. But what I like is that while he has gone through efforts to improve and work through his problems, they still persist throughout the series. He's still very insecure and is looking for constant approval from Star. He still is jealous of how close Star and Marco are even though he has become friends with both of them. And it's shown several time that Tom tends to put his own problems above the problems of others. It shows that even though he wants to change and is willing to change, that doesn't mean that change come easy. It takes time and can be a long process. These are realistic character flaws that make Tom such a more complex and relatable character in my eyes. I relate a lot to Tom with his desire and constant struggle to improve as a person, and I feel like it's a struggle that's easy for a lot of people to relate to. Also...he's just such an edgy dork. He's...he is good boi.

 Another fantastic character is Eclipsa. Introduced about halfway into the series, Eclipsa was a former Queen of Mewni who was imprisoned in crystal due to dabbling in dark magic and for running away from her arranged marriage and marring the King of the Monster, Globgor. The show builds up mentions of Eclipsa early on, with characters talking about how evil and dangerous she was. Eventually she becomes free from her prison (cause lets be real, whenever there's a villain sealed away somewhere you KNOW they're going to get out.) But surprisingly, when we see her she actually doesn't seem that evil. She's polite, kind, and is even willing to go through the proper legal channels to prove that she isn't as bad as people say she is. She is an excellent example of a morally ambiguous character cause for the first several episodes we the audience don't really know if she is actually a good person who's just been judged too harshly by society or if she is actually evil and this is all an act. As even as the show goes on and it becomes clear that Eclipsa is a good person at heart they still manage to keep the audience guessing. Much like Star, Eclipsa can be kinda selfish and impulsive, making her a bit of a loose cannon.  Despite the shows title "Star vs. The Forces of Evil" Eclipsa goes to emulate one of the shows major themes. That life isn't that black and white.

 The show deals a lot with shades of gray when it comes to its characters, as all characters have there own motives and backstories and relations with each other that can make them either allies or enemies depending on the circumstances. An example of this is the Magical High Commission, a group that monitors magic across all the dimensions. throughout the series it is shown that they stand on the side of Mewni. So in season two when Mewni is being conquered by  Ludo and Toffee they're good guys. But just like most most people in Mewni they hate monsters and believe that Eclipsa is evil. Making them antagonist in seasons three and four. Their motives stay the same, but their role in the series changes.

 However despite my praise not all the characters are  great. In fact the show can be kinda hit or miss with their cast. The characters that are great are really great, but then you get characters like...

(Art by JelloApocolypse)

 You know what, I have to be honest. I kinda like Pony Head. I know a lot of people say she's annoying and selfish and contributes next to nothing to the plot...and they're right. But I also just kinda like her. I think what makes her more bearable to me is that she's kinda disliked in-universe. Even Star, who is Pony Head's best friend, often times get sick of her crap. Real talk though, can we all agree that Pony Head is basically just a discount Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time?  Like, they're nearly the exact same character.  

 A character who I don't like as much though is Glossaryck, the magical spirit guide that lives in Star's spell book. I never really got his deal. Sometimes it seems like he likes Star and genuinely wants to help her become a better magic user, while other times it doesn't seem like he really cares. He dies in the beginning of season three only to come back a few episodes later acting like a wild animal and yelling "Globgor" over and over again without any explanation as to how or why. Than at the end of season three it's revealed that it was all an act and he was fine the whole time. Like...why? We later learn that is a highly recognized historical figure in Mewni. Why is he yelling his name? And why does nobody question why he's doing this? I can buy that Star and Marco might not know who Globgor is but most everybody else seems to. I keep expecting that moment for his motivations to click. Where it's revealed how everything he's done was all an elaborate ploy to help Star or something, but it never really happens. Though my opinion of him does slightly increase in season four, but that's just because Keith David took over the role of voice actor. And adding Keith David can make anything better.

 Some characters can even change in quality between seasons. Janna is this edgy punk girl who joins the main cast in season two as a new friend to Star and Marco. I liked her well enough in season two even if some of her more abrasive elements could be somewhat obnoxious. She's more or less absent for most of season three. Then come season four she returns and I found her more annoying. I don't know if her character got worse or if it was just the fact that her character didn't work as well in later episodes after the show had become more dramatic. But near the end of the season, they give her some long overdue character growth. Not a lot, but some. And I found myself liking her more.  

 There are other characters in the series as well, and they tend to vary. Star's mom, Moon is a BAMF and I like Buff Frog a lot. Jacki and Kelly are fine characters, though I admit there's not that much to them outside of being love interests for Marco, though they still have there own personalities. King River's kinda annoying but I've seen worse examples of the "dumb dad" trope and Alan Tudyk gives a great performance.

 And since I don't have time to go over my thoughts on EVER character in this series, I'll do what ever online review does when they don't have time for nuance. Create a tier list!

 If It's not apparent by now, the characters in this show run the gambit. With the best ones being some of my favorite characters of all time, and the worse one's just being generally annoying. However, if there's one thing that this show excels at is not painting things as black and white. No character is evil without a reason and all the heroic characters have un-heroic flaws to their characters with unique motivations that make sense for their characters. (For the most part anyway.)

 The shows animation is also really good. Featuring thick outlines and a lot of nice coloring on the characters. (Even if some of the background colors can be a bit drab at times.) Most of the first season is done in flash, but it's good flash, which does well to accentuate the character expressions and the fluid action scenes. Part way through season one though the show's animation changes to more traditional animation. I think there is a bit of a divide on which style people consider to be better, but I personally prefer the look of the later seasons. The bouncy look of the early season one episodes look good, but I don't know how well that would of worked in the more dramatic and somber moments that happen later on.

 I also appreciate the world building. The first two seasons are set mostly on Earth in the town of Echo Creek, but the last two seasons changes things up and focus much more on Mewni, allowing us to explore both settings. I know some people don't like the change as it resulted in several of the characters introduced earlier being written out of the show but I never really minded that. I think Mewni and the cast of characters who inhabit it are on the whole more interesting than the people of Echo Creek. (I mean does anybody really miss Sensei Brantley?) Plus the change in setting allows us to get a bit of a role reversal with Marco being the fish out of water, and Star having to show him how her world operates. And even if you do prefer the Earth setting we still cut back to it on occasion. And when you add it all up the total series runtime between the two setting is fairly evenly.

 I like how characters can kinda come and go in this series, as it shows that the world doesn't revolve around Star and Marco. And it allows the writers to see which characters people gravitate to and focus on them while keeping less interesting characters out of the way. It also allows for character arcs to actually have conclusions, without the need for them to be drawn out just for the sake of keeping characters around longer.

 Let's talk about themes for a moment. Specifically the main theme of prejudice and  systemic racism in the show. It's handled...okay. It's kinda standard stuff and it doesn't go super complex on the issue, but for what it is it works though. That being said the show can be a bit confusing in terms of what counts as "monsters" and what are just regular races in this world. Which can make the metaphor a little muddled. I get that the idea is that there is no difference, and that monsters are only deemed as bad as an excuse for mewmans to justify their mistreatment of them, but it can still be confusing as to who's oppressed and who isn't and to what extent. I feel it would be even more confusing for a younger children watching who might not understand all the nuances of this stuff. However, the way the show tackles this isn't bad either. And the fact that the show tackles this element at all is admirable.

 But who cares about systemic racism! That's not the real reason people are watching this show! We all know that everybody is really here for the shipping!

 Yeah, as the series went on the shipping seems to become a much more major element within the series. So much so that to many the increased focus on the shipping is often cited as one of the main elements that caused the show to go down hill. However I never really minded it. I mean Star vs. has always been a bit of a love letter to the shojo/magical girl genre and romance is a very important element to those types of shows. So it makes sense that it would be used here. And I think it's used pretty well here overall. These are just kids struggling through these types of feelings for the first time, So it makes a lot of the stupid decisions that they make feel a lot more believable. But if this kind of thing isn't your cup of tea, it might end up bothering you. Because they do devote a good amount of time on it.

 But you're probably wondering, who do I ship? Am I team Starco or team TomStar? And honestly, while shipping has never been something I've ever gotten too invested in, if I had to pick I would probably have to say team Starco. Which may be surprising as I previously went on and on about how Tom was one of my favorite characters of all time. But this is the way I see it. Tom's whole arc is about learning how to get over his jealousy and controlling nature regarding his relationship with Star. And it's shown that even after he's dating Star, and has everything he thought he wanted, he still couldn't fully get over his hangups. Even though he loves Star and Star loves him, it's clear that the relationship still isn't exactly the most healthy. And it's clear that they are going in different directions in their lives. Tom knows what he wants. To be with Star. But Star doesn't know what she wants. Not all relationships have to end because one person does something wrong or because one of the parties involved is a bad person. Sometimes two people just aren't compatible in that kind of way. And seeing Tom be the one to break up with Star shows just how far he's come as a character. Plus, like I said earlier, Star and Marco have great chemistry. And I do genuinely see them working as a romantic couple, beyond the fact that there the two main leads.

 Besides, StarTom is technically incest so....

 *record scratch!*

 Oh wait, you didn't know about that.? Yeah, according to the official "Star vs. the Forces of Evil Magic Book of Spells" Star's Great Great Great Grandmother Rhina Butterfly was in a relationship with John Roachley, a second cousin to the Lucitor's. Now granted that would mean that Star and Tom aren't THAT related. But still. Incest none the less. Not that it even matters anyway since all of the Mewmans are descended from like five random people!  

Seriously, this is some Ishigami Village levels of incest we got going on here.

 But despite how heated the flames wars can be, I think we can all agree that Tomco is the best ship anyway. Like come on now.

 So yeah, even the shipping elements didn't bother me. To be completely honest, while the show did have some problems here or there, I found myself enjoying the show well into the fourth season. But I knew it was coming. Since I was watching the show months after the series had concluded, I had heard things about the finale. A finale that figuratively "cleaved" the fan base. But in order to talk about the finale we have to go a few episodes back and talk about the episodes leading up to it. Obviously spoilers ahead.

 To briefly recap, at this point in the series Eclipsa had become Queen of Mewni along with her husband Globgor after Star relinquished the crown to her. And many of the Mewmans are upset by Eclipsa's new "pro-monster" policies had left to live with the former Queen Moon. Meanwhile Mina Loveberry, a legendary monster fighter from generations far gone, had begun building up an army to invade Eclipsa's castle and take Mewni back from the monsters. A lot of people I hear don't like Mina as a final villain, but honestly I was surprised by how threatening they were able to make her despite how goofy she is. And her backstory about basically being a magically altered super solider driven to the point of insanity really helped to make her sympathetic. (Like I said, in this show everyone is painted with shades of gray. Even genocidal lunatics.) She invades with a Solarian Knight, a giant magic powered mech and it takes all of our heroes working together to barely defeat it. Until it is revealed that it was only one of many. It's an amazing twist that really leaves you wondering "How are or heroes going to get out of this one." Up to this point I was digging this final arc. But that's when I finally got to it.

 To me, the moment where Star vs. the Forces of Evil got bad was the moment it was revealed that Moon was working with Mina to reclaim the thrown from Eclipsa.

 It just doesn't fit Moons's character to do this. While it is shown throughout the season that Moon does not agree with Eclipsa more extreme policies, It was still shown that while Moon may be against Star's decision to give the crown to Eclipsa, she acknowledges that since Star was queen at the time and was within her right as queen to decide what was best for the kingdom. And in previous episodes she seemed generally happy not having the responsibility that comes with being queen anymore. But now she suddenly wants her kingdom back? If she wanted it back, all she had to do was say so from the start. At the start of the season most Mewmans still hate Eclipsa. It would not be that hard to stage a coup if she really wanted, especially since the magic high commission and all of Mewni would be on her side. Why would she work with Mina, who Moon knows is insane and racist even by Moons standard? Sure Moon and Eclipsa definitely don't see eye to eye on a lot of things but Moon still wouldn't want her dead, and Moon knows that Mina wants to kill her. I know she thought she could control Mina's army but that's still a big risk. It seems uncharacteristically reckless for a character as intelligent as Moon to make these choices.

 So then, after it turns out that Moon can't control Mina's army, our heroes are basically screwed and are forced to hide out in a special tavern located at the edge of the universe to wait things out while Mina begins rounding up all the monsters in Mewni. They are all trying to figure out a plan on how to possibly defeat Mina's army when Star suddenly goes on a rant about how magic is bad. And this idea had been brought up a few times in the series, but overall had never really been portrayed as a major aspect. But suddenly the show treats this as if it's all the magics fault, and that everything would be better if it was gone. And that's when Star comes up with the genius plan to use go to the magic dimension to destroy all the magic. Thus making Mina's forces useless. And while I admit that yes, they are very much been pushed to a wall here, this has to be one of the most overkill ideas they could of possibly think of!

 Now, I've seen a lot of people online saying that by doing this, Star would be committing mass murder on a multiverse scale, potentially destroying many universes. And I think that is a bit of a reach. From what we see in the series, it seems to me at least that magic is kinda a rare thing in the universe. That's why so many villains are trying to steal the magic wand away from Star. And I see very little implying that there are whole universes that are reliant on magic outside of Mewni. THAT SAID THOUGH, this would result in the deaths of a lot of innocent people. But Star really only seems concerned with the fact that once magic is destroyed, all people who come from parallel universes will return to their home universe, meaning she won't be able to stay with Marco. Which makes Star seem beyond selfish and generally pretty horrible.

 Hekapoo, one of the high commission members, despite being made of magic and knowing that she will die from this, is totally on board for this plan because plot. And our heroes travel to the magic dimension to destroy all the magic. Which they do. Defeating Mina's forces and leaving her powerless. She still manages to escape however because nobody decides to actually, you know, try to arrest the person who just committed a political coup and nearly whipped out an entire race. They just let her walk off, because she's powerless now. I mean what's the worse she could possibly do, right?

 So yeah, Mina is defeated, but everybody is sent back to their home dimensions. But somehow, through the power of love I guess, the universes of Earth and Mewni begin to merge. Thus allowing Star and Marco to be together. Happy ending, I guess? I don't know.  Like Star and Marco being together is treated as a good thing. But we also see humans screaming as there world have now been overrun by monsters. Is this suppose to be a joke? A bittersweet ending? I'm not really sure.

 In concept the idea of a universe merge is actually a pretty interesting idea. As it feels like a natural progression of the shows themes of racial tolerance and mutual understanding. Now that we've gotten semi-tolerance between monsters and mewmans we could now have an arc about trying to bridge the cultural gaps between the humans and the mewmans. Plus it would be a good way to appease both the people who enjoyed the earlier seasons focus on Echo Creek, and fans of the later seasons who preferred the stories set on Mewni. It's not a bad idea, but it needed to A.) be set up better and B.) needed more time to be fleshed out. I get that it's designed to be a sequel hook, but it's not like this is something that the series had been building up to to the point where we the audience can put together what happens next. As is, it's just weird.

 So yeah, the last couple of episodes of Star vs. where a total mess. It's fitting that the finale to Star happened to come out the same day as the finale of Game of Thrones. While I'm not going to act like there weren't some parts I liked or some good ideas sprinkled throughout, this finale was pretty bad. How do you have a show that preaches acceptance and equality and end it with a genocide?! But hey, genocidal problems call for genocidal solutions am I right?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Ufmrn7BCuA

My God, It's Dragon Ball Super all over again.

 And the worse part is that the series didn't have to end this way. Cause the show actually had a pretty good episode about half way through the season, "Cornonation" which would of acted as a great series finale! With the series ending with Eclipsa as Queen and ruling with Globgor by her side, with the mewmans finally accepting monster kind. You'd have to change a few things, like rap up Mina's plot and put Star and Marco together, but other than that it could of really worked. Admirably it may end up feeling more like a finale for Mewne as oppose to a finale for Star but it would thematically fit with the message of the series. Or if you really wanna keep this finale more in tack just don't have Star destroy the magic. Just have Star, Moon, and Eclipsa go off and do the one thing the three of them had never tried doing. Working together. And have them defeat Mina the old fashion way. They even allude to this idea in the tavern episode before Star goes on her whole "We gotta destroy the magic" kick.

 It is a bit ironic to think that a show that's whole message is about unity could end up being so divisive with it audience. I genuinely believe that had the show ended on a better note, people would look back on the show more fondly. Despite the flaws. To the people who don't like Star vs. The Forces of Evil, I can understand where you are coming from. Even if you ignore the finale there are things to not like. A lot of things aren't very well explained and the show has its fair bit of plot holes. The series can be repetitive with its frequent shipping and "racism is bad" episodes. And some of the characters can be a bit annoying, including our main lead at times.

 That being said though, I have to say, I can't bring myself to hate this show.

 I don't know what it is, but I just found myself getting really invested into this series. Maybe it was due to me hearing so much bad things about the later seasons that I had low expectations, and while that may be part of it I don't think that's the whole reason. When you watch as many cartoons as I have, and for as long as I have, it becomes harder for things to impress you. Sometimes it can feel like your just checking shows off of a box, which is something that I've been trying to improve upon. But watching this show, it brought me back to the way I felt back in the early 2010's when I first started getting into these types of series.  For all of Star's flaws, and trust me there are many flaws, it felt like it was doing something unique. Like it was in it's own little world that wasn't quiet Adventure Time and not quiet Steven Universe. And the series stuck with me after I finished watching it, which is surprisingly kinda rare. It's why I became interested in doing this review in the first place.

 Star vs. the Forces of Evil is a flawed show. Very flawed. But I'd rather have a flawed show that's unique than a perfect show that's something I've seen a million times. And while I may not be a fan of how it ended, I don't think that should completely take away from all the good that this show has to offer. This show isn't going to be for everybody, and If you somehow made it this far into the review without seeing the show than I hope I've said enough to help you figure out if this show is right for you. But for me, despite everything, the series still has it's magic.

 What did you think of Star vs. the Forces of Evil? I really genuinely want to know on this one.  Did it go downhill and if so than when? Leave those thoughts in the comments down bellow. Please fav, follow, and comment if you liked the review. And have a great day.

[bts-love-sweat-tears]

Nochu & Butterfly

Title: Nochu & Butterfly

Pairing: Jungkook x reader

Genre: Gang!au, angst, ultimately fluff

Rating: PG-15 (first time using the official BTSWritersGuild rating system! LMK if I’m wrong!)

Warnings: I mean…it’s a gang!au. Blood, gun violence, references to illicit activities, self-loathing, frequent mentions of death, the occasional sleazy pickup line, language (a constant with me),  Guk being a tattooed softie.

Word Count: 2,764

A/N: The long overdue request from @zerotexas1975 as a part of my follower celebration! Thank you for being so patient and always kind! I hope you love it!!!  

I’m in my last semester of grad school, and I work, so life has been kicking my butt. And I’ve been so unhappy having ideas but not being able to find the time to write for you all. I’m hoping to get part 5 of One Ring up this week as an apology.  I’m also working on a Life Eclipsed rework and  a new Joon fic I have in mind- this mixtape cannot come soon enough!!!!

I have a conference and will be headed to Phoenix and LA this weekend and will likely have some time on the flights. Thank you again for being so patient with me!  Will edit as I see them but I wanted to get this out<3 <3 <3

Like the caterpillar emerging from the chrysalis reborn as a butterfly, every time your opponents thought you dead, you emerged, reborn. Stronger, better, faster. That was how you got your codename: Butterfly. Sometimes though, you felt like a phoenix, being burned alive while being reborn, and you wondered if it would be less painful to stay as ashes. But you had a debt to pay, and flirting with the abyss didn’t pay the bills.

Long ago, in a far away land-or really, just the post-industrial remains of your city two decades ago, the city’s most notorious gangster found a small, bruised, hungry child. The final threads of human empathy must have stirred in his bloodthirsty heart, because he took you in and offered you a warm bed and a meal. Had you been less desperate, you would have been skeptical of accepting any offers of charity from a strange man, but you had been young and defenseless. Now though, you knew that everything came at a cost- some more dear than others.

You supposed, in his mind’s eye, that he had raised you up. No one ever bothered you, and if they so much as looked at you funny, they might return later sporting a new bruise marring their skin.  Your “father” start you with small errands, eventually progressing to  drug runs, security, intel, heists-no one ever expected you, and that was your advantage. You were small but fast, light on your feet after years of lost fights and close calls.

But now, as your final initiation to full membership the final test: murder. Your father figure had asked you to take down the heir to the rival gang across town.  Known as Nochu, he led the crime family known only as Bangtan, and they had become far more organized under his leadership. Whereas your father was known for muscle and displays of aggression, they were know for their smarts and stealth, trafficking sensitive shipments for clients with the utmost secrecy. In fact, some even doubted their presence, but when your father’s hired mercenaries started to idle about more than they were out bullying people, your father naturally felt threatened.

You didn’t want to kill anyone, but you saw little choice. It was that or pay back a lifetime of accumulated debt-you couldn’t even begin to fathom the amount. And no one ever left- at least not unless they were six feet under. So instead, you were dragging your feet as long as possible, gathering as much information as you could possibly justify, and preparing yourself for the worst. You’d been living on borrowed time anyway, and loyalty meant a lot in your world. Maybe it was just something to accept. You had accepted everything else prior, but this felt like the end of any chance at redemption.

A small consolation: Nochu & co. were making it immensely difficult to find anything more than shadowy rumors. A little bird (aka your favorite irritable ajumma at the market) had mentioned that something was happening  that night by the docks on far side of town. This was where you now found yourself, fingers numb from the damp chill and legs cramping beneath you from disuse. You’d been out here in the fall drizzle for hours, waiting for something, anything.There was a young boy in a windbreaker and high tops sitting at a bench, feeding bread to the  seagulls, which struck you as odd. It was too damn cold. Normal people’s lives must be boring if this was the best way they had to spend their time. And why the middle of the night? Didn’t he know there were delinquents about? You smirked, realizing the irony of how protective you felt over the strange young man, considering that you were one of said delinquents. The tattoos skimming your arms and collarbones attested to that clearly enough.

Your mind wandered as you got bored, and you continued to watch the boy, who was still sitting there You could feel your leg starting to seize up, but there was scant little you could do, unless you wanted to stand up and alert the whole damn neighborhood to your location on the rusted warehouse fire escape. It had been in the shadow of the neighboring building, but even so, shadows could only shift so much before any sentinels might notice your location.  

Just as you were wondering if the ajumma had sent you on a wild goose chase, another man emerged from the shadows.  He was older, boxier, softer. He looked like the type of person who had spent years working at a desk job, moving from cubicle to corner office, slowly but surely accumulating intoxicating power in society. You’d met a million other men exactly like him, and you always wondered at their greed. Why was enough never enough? He didn’t seem like the type of person to hang out with Seagull, as you had taken to calling him in your head, but who were you to judge? You didn’t seem like the gangster type, but here you were.

If you hadn’t spent years training, you would have never noticed the transaction switch hands, the boy tucking a wad of suspiciously crisp bills into his jacket.

“And the rest of it?” The boy inquired, dark glint in his eyes completely incompatible with the person you had seen feeding the birds only a few moments ago.

“You’ll get it when you finish the job,” the man huffed, clearly irritated.

“Those weren’t the terms.” The boy’s voice was low with anger, cheek ticked out in frustration.

“We do this on my terms,” the older man chuckled, irritating the boy further. The boy moved as though to grab him by the collar, but the older man was faster, clicking the safety off on a handgun that must have been hidden somewhere in his genteel blazer.

You leaned forward, trying to get a better view, and that was when the rusted guardrail of the fire-escape gave way. Years of training kicked in, and though you were a couple stories up, you landed on your feet, scraping your knees and wrists only a little in the process. You were facing the old man, whose face was turning purple with rage.

“I thought we agreed to meet alone. You have your spies here, Nochu?!” He shouted, spittle flying from the corners of his mouth. This told you everything that you needed to know: Corporate Goon was new-really new- if he didn’t recognize your tattoos, and secondly, more importantly, you had finally found your elusive target.  But before you could even turn around, Goon had shot you in the side, carrying on unintelligibly about teaching Nochu a lesson for crossing him. It was laughable that he thought you,of all people, worked for him.

You spun around, hoping to memorize the boy’s face, for when you met up on more advantageous terms.

Your head didn’t believe in love at first sight, but your heart was saying something else. Or maybe it was just the mixture of intense pain and gushing blood loss. Though you couldn’t guess whether he was feeling what you were or just surprised to see you  fall from the sky and land on your feet, he seemed equally stunned, eyes round and teeth biting in to his lower lip hesitantly.

But you soon had no choice in the matter but to end your revelation early- you could feel the familiar dizziness associated with blood loss headed your way. And you’d be damned if you let some seagull-feeding softie best you. So you slipped back into the night that had become so familiar, wondering if Nochu’s (and your) time was up.

A few weeks later, knees scabbed, palms mostly healed, and shotgun wound aching slightly, you found yourself in completely different surrounds. The cold, rusted fire-escape had been exchanged for an opulent ballroom. You were sure if you looked, you would find the goon who had shot you rubbing elbows, shoulders and god knows what else with the local politicians. Though you were rarely so vengeful, you longed to teach him a lesson. Gunshot wounds took foreverto heal. Even now, if you twisted in a certain way, you would find blood dotting your bandages later.

But Corporate Goon wasn’t your target for the night. Instead, you were here for Nochu. Your father had been displeased when you had returned that cold rainy night, blood gushing and little to show for it. So you’d been left on your own to bandage yourself. You supposed you should be grateful it wasn’t worse. But here you were, knowing in your heart of hearts that tonight was the night. It had to be. So you sucked up your pride, and found yourself here, dressed to the nines, hoping to slip away with a certain boy amidst the chaos of a large party. Thought it wouldn’t exactly be a romantic tryst you’d be having.

You knew you didn’t have the luxury of more time. Rumor on the street had the ajummas packing up early. Your father was seen as weak, not eliminating a younger gang in the same city, encouraging other groups to make their move to fill the perceived vacuum. But you knew it wasn’t true that he was weak, nor that he would go down without a bloody fight. It had been a bitch and a half to get more intel on Nochu, but you knew as well as anyone that he’d be here-to show face, and maybe make good on the dirty money all these beautiful, wealthy, powerful people owed him.

You scanned the room, idly wondering how unacceptable it would be to throw your demon shoes into the crowd below, when a hand slipped around your waist, hovering over your wound, but not pressing down. A power play- whoever it was knew exactly who you were, and your weakness, but has decided not to push the matter….yet.

“What is someone like you doing in a place like this?” A warm voice teased, and you hated yourself for blushing slightly. Sleazy lines shouldn’t work on you at this point. To anyone else here, the two of you looked like a young, flirtatious couple enjoying the anonymity of a large gathering, instead of rivals out for blood.

“I could ask you the same thing,” you shot back, doing your best to appear undeterred. “Aren’t you risking your reputation of maintaining the lowest profile amidst all the families in this city?” No point in beating around the bush, when he would soon be eliminated.

He looked at you, eyes surprisingly open and honest, but before he can speak, the loudest booming sounds you had ever heard echo throughout the enormous space, followed by even more chaos and screaming. Grabbing Nochu’s hand without thinking, you rushed to the nearest exit, but stumble to a halt as you see your father’s men at the door. They appraise you, hand in his, and give you a knowing (if not unsympathetic look), and you know that it is over for you as much as it is for him.It was a set up, and you should have known better than to trust anyone, least of all your bloodthirsty father. ow convenient- to be rid of a threat and liability in one go.

Before you could even process the emotions you were feeling, the crumbling building a metaphor for the flimsy life you had constructed, debris falls, trapping you to the ornate floor. You heard a shout from the boy next to you, but your reeling head had already bounced off the marble floor and everything was going black.

At first, you thought you were lying  on the beach. It was a nice dream for the few seconds it lasted, but then you realized it was just the rhythmic pounding of a massive headache. You cracked an eye, trying to get your bearings. Much to your surprise, the boy from earlier was there, this time sans evening wear. Instead, he has donned a comfy tee and sweats, looking strikingly normal.  As your vision adjusted, his tattoos blurred in and out of focus, stretching from his wrists to locations unknown under the sleeves of his tee shirt. Tattoos were earned, a sign of membership- and he had a ton,especially for one so young.

You sat up, hating feeling vulnerable in front of a rival, and try to swing your feet to the ground, but your efforts to stand only served to make you more dizzy. Your concussion was worse than you thought. You shrugged internally. You’d experienced worse, and worse would be waiting for you out there. It would have been a mercy to die back there. A phoenix, indeed. Before you can right yourself, steady hands reach out, and gently prop you back up.

“Why are you being nice to me?” The words tumbled out before you could stop yourself. “You’ve seen my tattoos.” You wouldn’t allude to your guardian directly, but unless he was an idiot, he would know what you mean.

He smirked, dimple appearing on one side of his face. “What do you take me for? It would be completely dishonorable when my opponent is incapacitated. Would you go after me if the tables were turned?” You snorted at that. Yes.Well, if he were anyone else.

As you tried to unravel the enigma that was the boy in front of you, he stood, closing the door behind him quietly. You rushed to the door, ignoring the residual dizziness. You could hear him quietly addressing two other men, presumably stationed on the other side. Though it was to be expected that they kept an eye on you, some small part of you felt hurt to be under lock and key.

You didn’t have time to get sentimental- you had to determine your best course of action. What were their intentions? Where were you, beyond the obvious? Where would you go, now that your father knew that you knew where to find Nochu and yet had not killed him?Not only had you taken a bullet for the very person you were supposed to eliminate, you had literally fallen for him after you had fallen from the fire-escape.The irony did not escape you. And though you had ultimately been incapacitated, when your fight or flight response kicked in, your hand had immediately found his. In a moment of clarity, you realized that you would accept any fate your father had in store before you hurt this man.

The murmured conversation continued, and you could barely make out the words.

“Are you sure about this?” a lower male voice continues. “From our intel Butterfly one of their best.”

“You’re playing a dangerous game,” a third voice chimes in. “How do you know she’ll accept at all? How do you know Butterfly won’t turn and run back to them?”

“Keep your voice down,” he commanded coldly, “She’s barely recovering from blunt force trauma.” The authority in his voice leaves little doubt to how he was able to make the members fall into line, despite being the youngest head ever. “I was curious about what kind of gang member falls from above, only to take a bullet for a rival gang member, and then one who rescues a rival along with herself.”

“Which ultimately failed,” the second voice grumbles. “She almost got you crushed by a light fixture.”

“I don’t care,” he counters, sounding more sure of himself than anyone who almost died twice has any right to. “It was her intention that mattered.” The finality in his tone tells you that the conversation is over, and you rush back to the bed, desperate to not get caught eavesdropping.  In your dizziness, you overshoot, and land in a mass of pillows and blankets on the floor. Much to your chagrin, the door doesn’t squeak when opened, meaning that Nochu has witnessed this entire debacle. Once again, you ponder the preferability of being crushed in the explosion.

The smile on his face is the gentlest you’ve ever seen, even if you are a little indignant that he’s laughing at you.  But you find a small smile tugging at the corners of your own mouth in response.  

“Why don’t you come home?”He asked, palm upward, waiting for yours. And as cheesy as you found all of those dumb rom-coms you would watch secretly in your room, when he says it, you feel your heart open up, and another cycle begins.

[hazyheel]

Monday Night Raw  3/4/19 Review

We started the night with Roman Reigns coming out to a huge reception, and it still makes me happy to see that everyone is cheering him. He talks about how he needs to take his yard back, and he brings out Seth Rollins. The two talk about how they have inspired each other. Rollins said that he understood Reign’s feeling, losing a title without being pinned. Rollins offered him the Wrestlemania match, but Reigns declined it. Reigns then also said that he wanted to get the Shield back together, but Rollins was apprehensive. Reigns said that life was short, and they didn’t know how much time they had left, so they had to get back together. Rollins agreed, and they called Dean Ambrose out. Dean came out, but before he could say anything, Elias attacked him with a guitar and ran away. Ambrose was then too pissed to really reunite with his brothers, and walked to the past.

Grade: C-. It was a tough pill to swallow when I realized that this promo wasn’t as good as I had hoped. Considering that the Shield only broke up five months ago, and Ambrose’s heel turn totally flopped, I am not nearly as excited for the return of the Shield as I should be. Plus, the dialogue was a bit contrived and corny, so I wasn’t really feeling this. Still, one last ride for the Shield will be fun, and I like that Roman is back, so I will cut it a bit of slack.

Backstage, Charly interviewed Heel Inc. (Drew McIntyre, Baron Corbin and Bobby Lashey) and they said that they want a six man tag against Finn Balor, Brawn Strowman and Kurt Angle.

And that was our next match. There was a cool spot after we came back from a commercial, where Balor dove for a tag, but Corbin reversed it into a Deep Six. Angle got a hot tag, and he delivered a triad of German suplexes to McIntyre. Angle botched a rollthrough on a rollup, but still managed to lock in the ankle lock. After we got back from one of the many commercials during the match, Strowman nailed Corbin with a running powerslam, followed by a Coup de Gras for a near fall, broken up by Rush. In retaliation, Strowman rammed Rush through the barricade, taking him out of the match. Lashley then hit Balor with the spear for the win. After the match, the heels continued their assault on the  face team, particularly Kurt Angle. McIntyre nailed Balor with a claymore, and then a double chokeslam into the steps from the others.

Grade C+. Not a bad match, but a bit boring. It definitely was hurt by the odd amount of commercials during the match. But, the closing sequence was exciting, and now we have a logical setup for a rematch between Bobby Lashley and Finn Balor. That will probably be at Wrestlemania, so hopefully they can work on their match. It has potential, but Lashley has yet to have a standout match since he returned. This could be his big break.

Backstage, Charly interviewed Heavy Machinery about how they rubbed the Ascension the wrong way. After cringy backstage footage of them, Otis said that their words hurt his feelings (funny) and they challenged the Ascension to a match.

Next out was Natalya who took on Ruby Riott (jobber entrance). The match was quick, with Natalya locking in a sharpshooter before rolling up Riott for the win. Immediately following the match, Lacy Evans did a catwalk. Her new nickname is the sassy southern belle. Natalya looked just as confused as we are.

Grade: D. Action was surprisingly good for a short match, but it doesn’t seem to do much other than bury Riott. And Evans is still being misused, so I didn’t care about this segment.

Backstage, Michael Che and Colin Jost showed up. Apparently they are gonna be at Wrestlemania. It is clear that WWE wrote this “comedy” cuz those two are way funnier than the stupid segment that just transpired. Although Colin got some heat for wearing a New York baseball cap.

There was then a promo from Triple H, who talked about how Batista betrayed Ric Flair and himself when he attacked last week. He also kinda broke character, saying that he felt bad for Richard Flehr. He made a joke about how Flair has been married several times while talking about their friendship. Trips then ran down Batista for quitting wrestling and complaining about not getting what he wanted. Triple H then said that he will always be waiting for Batista, and told him to have some balls and confront Triple H about their problems. He then said that when they fight, it won’t be about characters, it’ll be about a man who is pissed.

Grade: B. It was a very good promo. Could’ve been in the A-range, but I really wasn’t a fan of the way he broke the fourth wall. These stories will never feel real, so I don’t like how they are trying to make it that way. I’m not into those types of stories. But this rivalry is heating up, and it is quite entertaining.

After a quick recap of the Ronda Rousey situation from last week, Stephanie told Charly that they were going to listen to Rousey, and that they were lifting the charges on Becky. Steph then booked the match at Fastlane between Charlotte Flair and Becky Lynch for the vacant Raw Women’s Championship. But they also said that Lynch had to sign a contract that said she can’t sue the company for any injuries she sustains during that match. I like that they actually let Ronda vacate the title, which is very interesting. I don’t know how the match at Fastlane will go, and I am looking forward to it. After a commercial, we saw Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns talking about what happened earlier in the night, but Ambrose didn’t want anything to do with Reigns.

Then there was a gauntlet match, with Heavy Machinery running the gauntlet. They started against the B-Team, and beat them quickly. Then, they took on the Ascension, whom they beat with a big splash after a bit of a struggle. Then it was Zack Ryder and Kurt Hawkins, and Otis hit a cool pop up power slam, and then a caterpillar for the win.

Grade: C-. Match was kinda bland, and it didn’t have any purpose, but at least Heavy Machinery are doing something. They aren’t perfect, but they are something.

Once again, we had Colin Jost and Michael Che are talking about their jobs as corespondents backstage. They interacted with EC3, kinda. They just called him weird. And then Titus O’Neil asked Colin to take a picture of him and Che, but totally dissed Jost. Che then was about to party with No Way Jose, but Jost stopped him. Pretty funny actually. They aired a video package of Torrie Wilson, who is being inducted into the hall of fame. And Charly talked to Charlotte Flair backstage about how Becky Lynch may not sign the contract, but Flair said that Lynch will sign, and Flair will win. Another backstage interaction between Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose, and Ambrose refuses to rejoin the Shield.

Finally, we went back to the ring, for an Elias concert. He got mega heat for just destroying the Philly crowd. Ambrose then came out for his match. Fairly lackluster match, came to a finish when Elias countered Ambrose’s elbow drop with a knee, and then hit the Drift away for the win. After the match, Rollins and Reigns tried to convince him again, but Ambrose walked away. Heel inc. then showed up, and told them that their reunion has failed. But when the heels attacked Rollins and Reigns, Ambrose protected them and they all put their fists in the middle to reunite.

Grade: B-. Subpar match, with a fun ending segment. The Shield reuniting was actually a lot more exciting than I thought. And I am looking forward to the match that was booked for Fastlane. It will be Lashley, Corbin and McIntyre vs. The Shield at Fastlane. Should be fun, and hopefully that will end the very odd and ongoing feud. They are also acknowledging on air that Ambrose is leaving, with Renee saying that he will move onto greener pastures, while Corey says that he is in the WWE, there are no greener pastures and he has no plans.

Next was a match between Sasha Banks and Tamina, with their tag partners at ringside. Nia Jax interfered, pulling Tamina out of the ring. Bayley tried to even the odds, but was whipped into the barricade. Sasha then took out Nia with a meteora, but ate a superkick getting back in the ring and lost.

Grade D-. Bad match, simple as that.

Jost and Che are backstage, and Jost is terrified of everyone. He comes face to face with Brawn Strowman. Strowman steals his New York hat, and gets a pop. Jost tries to small talk him, before asking if wrestling is real. Strowman then lifts him up the wall by his neck. They cut to commercial, and came back with other people trying to get Braun off of Colin. Kinda funny.

Next was the Raw Tag Team Championship match, pitting The Revival against Ricochet and Aleister Black. The Revival got a jobber entrance, which is a travesty. I haven’t seen their entrance since they won the belts. The match started out at a high speed. It didn’t take long for Bobby Roode and Chad Gable to come down to ringside. Black was able to make an awesome comeback using his knee strikes. Ricochet was in control, but when he threw Dawson out of the ring, Gable and Roode attacked Dawson and caused a DQ. Gable and Roode then confronted Ricochet and Black, but the faces got the better of the exchange.

Grade: C. Very short, but good action. A good use of a non finish, but now the champions seem to be being phased out of their own championship storyline to emphasize how new Ricochet and Black are. A difficult situation to work with, but its their own fault that they are in this situation.

In the main event, Steph came down to the ring, holding the Raw Women’s Championship like it is hers. That was annoying as a smarky fan. Charlotte stirred the pot a bit by encouraging Steph to just give Flair the belt. Lynch and Flair hurled insults at each other, and Lynch signed the papers. Thats when Ronda Rousey showed up, and marched to the ring. Another weird commercial, and Ronda just kinda complained about “losing” her championship. Steph changed the Fastlane match stipulation so that if Lynch wins, she gets added to the Wrestlemania match. Rousey then turned heel, saying that the fans didn’t appreciate her. Rousey basically just said “fuck this” to the whole situation, and attacked both Flair and Lynch. She beat the crap out of Lynch, and injured her arm. Backstage, Steph just put over Rousey.

Grade: B+. I disagree with the stipulation of the match that was booked, I personally thought that it should be a #1 contenders match, and I’d have had it come to a draw. But the rest of this was pretty good. They cleaned up the story a bit, and even turned Rousey heel. I think it was a tad early in the story for that, but it’ll work. So, we will have several entertaining matches in the coming weeks, and this was an intense segment. Definitely the highlight of the night.

Overall Grade: C-

Pros: Triple H promo, Shield Reunion, Rousey Heel Turn,

Cons: weird commercials, Natalya vs. Riott, Banks vs. Tamina, Tag Team championship match.

[out-of-jams]

Howl’s Moving Castle || Teaser || kth

↠ Howl’s Moving Castle ↞ Part of my Ghibli Yandere Series!

It was an accident: offending the witch. But she didn’t take it lightly, cursing you to age into an old hag overnight. With no way to reverse the spell, you took it upon yourself to hunt down the only person who may have been able to help. But the self-absorbed wizard who lived hidden away in the moving castle wouldn’t be so easy to convince.

Especially when it came to letting you go.

✐ Pairing: Kim Taehyung/Reader

✐ Warnings/Genre: Horror. Soft Yandere!Taehyung. Howl!Taehyung. Dark themes. Kidnapping. Obsessive behavior. Death of minor characters. Magic. Manipulation. Mature themes. Unhealthy relationships. Light violence. Smut. Some fluff. Explicit language. 18+

Comment below if you’d like to be tagged upon release!

In, through. Pull. Around.

In, through. Pull. Around.

The steel needle twisting around your fingertips did so without a second thought. Pushed through the heavy material to stitch together fabric until it resembled something wearable. Your eyes were glazed over as your mind wandered away from your task. Sewing was simple, so-much-so that you could look away from the hat in your hands and still thread it together. It came from the experience of owning a hat shop for most of your life.

“Is that Taehyung’s castle?”

The excitable titering of women’s voices brought you out of your trance-like state and left you blinking down at the half-sewn brown hat in your hands.

“It can’t be.”

You let the grasp you had on the needle falter in order to send a glance at the gaggle of women gathered at the window to the left. Through an archway they stood, with their bright colored dresses and overly large skirts. One of them tapped against the glass windowpane facing the street like the rest of them weren’t already looking.

And you couldn’t help the curiosity that had your head turning back to stare out of the window in front of you. Placed in the wall right above your cluttered work desk. You squinted in an attempt to see through the smog lingering in the air outside to the rolling green hills in the distance. Past the tops of buildings cramping the streets.

You could just barely see it, the giant machine that seemed to almost float across the ground it walked on. Even at its distance you could tell it was big, taller than the top of the highest building in the city. But you’d never seen it up close. No one had and lived to tell the tale of it.

The sight wasn’t common, but it wasn’t quite rare either. The monstrous mechanical structure that just barely resembled a castle had roamed the land for years. Ventured from town to town, city to city, never stopping in one place. Where it went and what it did, you hadn’t a clue. You’d only seen it a total of three times throughout your life.

But never close enough to get a glimpse of the wizard who was rumored to dwell within it. So evil and so powerful that no one dared to go near.

As it disappeared into the fog, you sighed. Turned back to the needle lying between your fingers with distaste. You didn’t hate what you did with your life, making hats day in and day out. But you didn’t like it either. Never had. But you’d been forced into taking over the shop when your father passed away years ago. It was boring, the routine, and you couldn’t help your craving for something more.

For adventure.

“I heard that the last man who saw Taehyung’s face disappeared. Vanished right into thin air.”

You shook your head to snap yourself out of your thoughts and went back to work.

In, through. Pull. Around.

In, through. Pull. Aro--

“I heard that he looks like a monster.”

“A monster? Don’t be ridiculous, Lotty. I heard that he’s quite handsome and likes to go into towns to seduce women to take as his own. Then he kills them afterwards.”

The needle fell from your fingers to dangle in between your legs by the threat still attached to the fabric. Frustrated at the lack of ability to focus due to the obnoxious women not working, you dropped the unfinished hat onto your work table. And pushed back your wooden stool to stand up.

The four women didn’t turn at your movement, didn’t even acknowledge your presence there. While they loved to gossip up a storm, they were good at what they did. So you didn’t berate them for their lack of work. Just grabbed your bag and slipped out the room and down the stairs. Maybe a few moments to yourself would do you well. You’d been stuck up in that stuffy shop for hours and taking a quick break wouldn’t hurt. Especially when you could barely focus on your work anyway.

The door to the shop closed tightly behind you and you took a moment to pull out a piece of cloth from your bag. Slipping it over your nose, you adjusted the thin straps of the face mask behind your ears until it sat perfectly. It wasn’t safe to step outside without one because the smog in the city was unhealthy to breathe in. Polluted by the airships that flew above your head and cast streaks of black smoke through the sky. From the four-wheeled cars that prowled the cobblestone streets like cats, puffing unbreathable air through the Square.

You hitched your bag higher up onto your shoulder as you took off at a sedated pace. There was a large amount of people crowding the streets, more so than what was usual in a city as large as that one. Perhaps it had something to do with the military parading through the roads on their way to the king’s castle as they returned from wherever they’d been. Taking up space like they owned the place. Like the citizens of Market Chipping actually wanted them there.

No one did. Not when your land of Ingary had been at war with the neighboring kingdom of Strangia for longer than you’d been alive. No one knew why exactly you were at odds with one another. Some debated that it had to do with stolen land, others insisted that the king of Strangia had done something to slight your own king. Whatever it was turned the land into a warzone.

“Hey, watch it!” A sharp elbow found its way into your side. And you stumbled back, a grunt falling from your throat as a short, middle aged man shoved past you with a glare.

He held a flag in his hand with the emblem of the royal family embroidered into it. Either he was on his way to protest the military parading through the city, or he was going to embrace them. While a majority of the people hated the presence of soldiers in Market Chipping, took to the streets to scream at them until they left. Some of the population praised them, welcomed them with open arms like they didn’t leave a trail of dead bodies and burned cities in their wake.

Because wherever the military went, death was soon to follow after.

You knew the main roads would’ve been packed from end to end with people and you didn’t feel like dealing with crowds. With more elbows forcing their way into the grooves of your ribs. So you took a shortcut through one of the alleyways closest towards your shop. They wouldn’t be as congested seeing as how almost all of the citizens poured themselves out into the streets for a reason.

So your journey was quiet. And your shoes scuffed at the ground as you wandered through the mazes between the buildings. The sounds of military vehicles driving through the streets that you could occasionally see through the gaps between buildings filled the silence. Along with shouts from the people pouring out of homes and hanging halfway out of the windows. Who sat on their balconies with heavy frowns on their faces.

A pair of single-manned airships flew above your head with the flag of the king following behind, attached to the backs of the machines to catch the air. You were close to your destination. Just needed to walk through a few more twisted alleyways until you made it.

“Well, well. What do we have here?”

You didn’t stop when the deep growl hit your eardrums. Kept walking in hopes that whoever had tried to talk to you would take the hint and leave you alone.

“Hey!” A rough hand grabbed at the bag hanging from your shoulder and pulled you backwards. And you tripped over your own feet in an attempt to stay upright. “I’m talking to you!”

With another tug, you were sent careening back into someone’s chest. The stench of cigarettes and whiskey hit you like a wall and had you sending a glare over your shoulder. A man towered above you with a blue rimmed hat pulled down low across his forehead. But you could still see the dark eyes that glimmered beneath like a snake.

“You lost, little mouse?” His lips, chapped and thin, pulled up into a smirk that spelled nothing but trouble. The navy blue military blazer on his back didn’t bring you relief. Quite the opposite really. Especially when the backdoor to a pub hanging open behind him spilled out another man that came stumbling to his side.

Caged you in like an animal.

“Let go.” Your jaw clenched as you attempted to pull away from the hand that held onto your bag like a leash.

“What do we have here, Reny? Why don’t you let us help you find your way?” The second man had a dark caterpillar that sat atop his lip in the form of a mustache. He leaned down to fan his heated beer stained breath across your face and it was only the facemask that prevented you from smelling it. “And we’ll only ask for one thing in return. How’s that sound?”

The first man let go of your bag to watch you stumble backwards with an amused flash in his eyes. You bit your lip in an attempt to stop it from quivering. But it did nothing to prevent the fear from flooding your veins and taking hold of your throat.

“I’m not interested. Let me pass, please.” You hoped that they weren’t able to hear how loud your heart was beating.

They were bigger than you, stronger than you. And you didn’t know what they’d do if they got their hands on you. Weren’t sure how far you’d make it if you had to run. The closest main street was farther than you would have liked, to the point where you could barely hear the roar of the crowd.

The second man took a few steps closer towards you. “Aw, don’t be like that sweeth--”

“Are you deaf?” That voice didn’t come from either of the men in front of you. It brushed through your ears with its rich baritone and had you straightening where you stood, tense muscles unconsciously relaxing. Especially when an arm around itself around your shoulders to settle with a comforting weight, bringing with it warmth that heated your skin. “Or are you just stupid?”

The first thing you saw was a slender hand decorated with a plethora of multicolored rings as it casually adjusted the bag hanging haphazardly from your shoulder. And you followed it up, and up until your eyes landed on who it was attached to.

And felt a tiny gasp escape your lips.

[sulevinblade]

OC Interview Meme

Tagged by: @mocha-writes (hopefully it tags you properly this time? But still, THANK YOU!!)

I’ll tag: @gremlinquisitor ofc, and anyone else who wants to do it! I don’t know who all among you may have already done it for your OCs but I love reading these!!

Since I did Ghilanel here, this one will be with Varevas. I’m... sorry, about him.

1. What is your name?

“You’ve lost my confidence with the very first question.”

2. What is your real name?

“Varevas, First of Clan Lavellan and Lord Inquisitor. I should make you use the entire thing for the duration as penance for not doing the least amount of background research.”

3. Do you know why you were called that?

“The end of it is just titles, of course, and I’m called those because I earned them, more or less. My given name is a variation of one given to at least one child in every generation of our clan in order to ensure someone carries our freedom forward. But no pressure.”

4. Are you single or taken?

“I am taken, frequently and to great mutual satisfaction.”

5. Have any abilities or powers?

“I love hearing them called powers because the implication is I went to bed one night unable to conjure a great fist of stone out of the loose Fade energy pouring from the rifts and then woke up able to do so. Maybe that’s how it looks to people who don’t possess magic of their own. I have many abilities, learned and honed through time and training. I have one power and that is closing rifts. I had nothing to do with that.”

6. Stop being a Mary Sue.

“I have no idea who that is.”

7. What’s your eye color?

“Green, light green.”

8. How about your hair color?

“Dark red. I’m thinking of growing it out.”

9. Have you any family members?

“My mother was killed by human bandits but my father is still alive, and I have one younger brother and a cousin with whom I’m quite close.”

10. Oh? What about pets?

“No, but recently we were in the Emerald Graves and I found a handful of caterpillars all climbing on some sort of communal nest or cocoon site. I didn’t really think anything of it and no one there knew what kind they were or if they were dangerous, but they did seem to respond to the sound of our voices. It was as though it startled them, but it looked like they were dancing, so I spent a few minutes teaching them different rhythms. I don’t think they cared for it but I never said I was good with animals. Bull thought it was hilarious.”

11. That’s cool I guess, now tell me about something you don’t like.

“I don’t like having my ancedotes dismissed. If we’re looking on a larger scale, I really don’t like that there’s an ancient magister threatening to destroy the world and start over and some people’s greatest concern is still how the ears of the person leading the fight to stop that are shaped.”

12. Do you have any hobbies/activities you like doing?

“I enjoy reading. My clan didn’t have many books and what we did have were focused on our history and written by other elves, which is very effective if you don’t ever plan on interacting with anyone other than elves ever. I can understand why many in my clan would have preferred that but I’ll take Skyhold’s library any day.”

13. Ever hurt anyone before?

“Oh yes, it’s a running joke. If you asked Dorian what my hobbies are, he’d tell you it’s indiscriminate murder, but I think I’m very discriminating.”

14. Ever… killed anyone before?

“I got ahead of myself with the last one. Well, asked and answered, but again, it’s not indiscriminate.” He looks unusually serious for a moment. “I learned my history and I know what indiscriminate murder looks like. What Corypheus intends is indiscriminate. What I am doing, as a representative of the Inquisition, is as thoughtful as it can afford to be. I don’t expect the families of people on the other side to thank me but I am doing what I feel has to be done.”

15. What kind of animal are you?

“A bear. Please ignore all follow up commentary from Dorian should there be any.”

16. Name your worst habits.

“I enjoy reading but I’m very bad at finishing books. There’s a stack of them beside my bed, all with bookmarks in them just waiting for my attention span to resolve itself. I don’t spend as much time here [in Skyhold] as I probably ought to but I’m not comfortable here. I interrupt Dorian’s research on a daily basis, though I can’t say that’s really all that bad since he still gets an impressive amount done.”

17. Do you look up to anyone at all?

“It’s disappointing to me that our differing opinions on the sovereignty of mages keeps Vivienne from giving me so much as the time of day because she’s achieved a kind of power and status that defies all expectations I have ever held for myself as a mage, and I was going to be Keeper of my clan. She’s competent, powerful, self-possessed, and a dazzling conversationalist. Many of those same things can be said of Solas but he also hasn’t kept himself apart in the same way so what admiration I may have for him is tempered by familiarity. We’re friendly, though I do still look up to him and now that he knows we share an interest in manipulating the energy coming from the rifts I think we’ll become even closer. Vivienne, however, is a class apart.”

18. Gay, straight, or bisexual?

“Gay. What a strange way to follow up your previous question.”

19. Do you go to school?

“And yet another unexpected turn! I began a mentorship under my clan’s Keeper as soon as I came into my magic. She ensured I studied other subjects as well but the main focus was history and lore; that’s a Keeper’s function, after all, it’s... it’s literally the name. Keeper.”

20. Do you ever want to marry and have kids one day?

“I haven’t really thought about it. I want to spend the rest of my life with Dorian but marriage is complicated for a lot of reasons, and frankly I can’t imagine anyone who takes the threat our world faces right now seriously daydreaming about raising a child. I want to make sure we have a world where raising families is still a possibility at the end of this but for myself, I don’t know.”

21. Do you have any fanboys/fangirls?

"I pay for my drinks at the Herald’s Rest just like anyone else. I really don’t care for being recognized even though I realize it’s inevitable. Except with you, though, you didn’t even know my name.”

22. What are you most afraid of?

“Fucking it all up. Absolutely just ruining everything. I like to keep my fears general so I’m always just a little terrified, it’s very motivational.”

23. What do you usually wear?

“I prefer light clothing that allows me to move easily. I need to ground myself in order to cast but I need to have my arms and body free.”

24. Do you love someone?

“I do. I never imagined that being an outcome of all this but I’m also lucky enough that he loves me back.”

25. When was the last time you wet yourself?

“Have you ever been gripped by the wrist and hoisted like a wet rag doll by a twelve-foot-tall creature made of red lyrium and avarice who wanted nothing more than to snap your hand off and kill you, knowing all your back-up had fled because you sent them away and the only outcome of this encounter was your death? You’d pee a little too, trust me.”

26. Well, it’s not over yet!

“I wouldn’t be surprised if he made me piss myself again, but this time I’ll be ready.”

27. What class are you? (High class, middle class, low class)

“Being the First of the clan meant I enjoyed certain privileges but our clan was not a wealthy one. My life here in Skyhold is an improvement in a lot of ways over life with the clan in that regard, and I suppose I am a lord now.”

28. How many friends do you have?

“More than six but less than ten. Draw your own conclusions.”

29. What are your thoughts on pie?

“Surprisingly difficult to make but worth it.”

30. Favourite drink?

“The water in Skyhold is the cleanest, freshest tasting water I’ve ever had, and it’s often bitterly cold too, so cold your teeth ache when you drink it. The castle is too cold to really enjoy that but I do enjoy it. Dorian thinks I’m mad but it’s the only cold thing I like.”

31. What’s your favourite place?

“My quarters, with all the doors closed and curtains hauled over them, a fire on and my lover close at hand. It’s the only way I can thaw out.”

32. Are you interested in someone?

“Keep. Up.”

33. What’s your bra cup size and/or how big is your willy?

“I've received no complaints.”

34. Would you rather swim in the lake or the ocean?

“Dorian tells me in Tevinter they have great indoor baths for swimming in. Given the option, one of those.”

35. What’s your type?

"Fire and Rift.” He pauses and sighs. “I don’t know that I could ever be with someone who wasn’t a mage. It made life in the clan very isolating because even as the First you were still seen mostly as competition for younger mages who wanted to keep their place in the clan. Having a ‘type’ never occurred to me. It still hadn’t when I ended up here. I don’t know that I have one. I love Dorian. I don’t need a type.” 

36. Any fetishes?

His eyes flash and narrow and Varevas leans forward in his chair. “Whenever possible, I try to convince Dorian to keep his clothes on when I go down on him. I get off on the smell of the leather and the jingle of all those ridiculous buckles and clasps keeping him bound up while I try to make him explode.” He maintains eye contact the entire time he speaks and there’s not a hint of color on his cheeks. “Dorian is an incredibly private man who would be profoundly hurt if I revealed anything factual in a situation like this, so do with that statement what you will.”

37. Seme or uke? Top or Bottom? Dominant or Submissive?

“We’re done discussing this.”

38. Camping or indoors?

“Indoors. Who doesn’t like being warm and dry?”

39. Are you wanting the interview to end?

“If that’s what it takes to end these questions about my private affairs then yes.”

40. Now it’s over!

“Brilliant. You can show yourself out.”

[nanonaturalist]

On outreach, volunteering, and the importance of bug stickers

When I was in grad school (studying chemical and biomedical engineering), I was struggling with the “what do I want to be when I grow up” question. I love science, but I also think there is a huge disconnect between scientists and other people. I was in my 20s before I knew what an engineer was, and as a kid I knew scientists existed, but I had no idea you could actually be one. Scientific literacy is super important, especially right now with man-children in our government saying science is up for debate... 

This is the reason I got really into museums and their role in public education. Almost the entirety of my scientific knowledge until I started studying engineering was from trips to museums, so naturally I wanted to be involved in exhibit planning and outreach programming. I was serious enough to enter the museum studies program in grad school, but struggled with the thought of finishing grad school with massive amounts of debt to work in a notoriously underfunded field where my salary would actually be less than my fellowship stipends. 

When I graduated, I cut my losses and got an engineering job. But when 2017 rolled around, I signed up for the Texas Master Naturalist training course. I had met some master naturalists at a few bioblitzes, and looked up with that meant. Basically, master naturalist are educated volunteers who work on service and outreach projects to preserve and encourage appreciation for the natural resources of Texas. I eagerly awaited the start of the first training course after I graduated and had free time again, and once the course started in January, I dove in head first. By the time I finished training and became certified, I had already racked up tons of advanced training and volunteer hours, and was already involved in more service projects and administrative tasks than any other person in my training class.

What is amazing to me is how I ended up doing exactly what I wanted to do in a museum, except it’s even better. In my master naturalist chapter, there are only a couple other people into bugs, and I am by far the most fanatical about the topic. I bring bugs for show-and-tell almost every chapter meeting, and am getting people who actively disliked bugs to look at them a little closer to appreciate them, and it’s awesome. 

But what I really love is talking about bugs with kids. Kids are so curious and so excited about learning (especially about “weird” stuff), but a lot of adults are boring and uninterested in having conversations with kids about things like spiders and poop. I brought a bunch of my bugs to an Audubon event in May, and kids were swarming my table the whole day. They were excited about bugs, I was excited about bugs. I had them try to find my camouflaging stick insects. I let them manhandle my dragonflies. I let them look at caterpillar poop in the microscope. I listened to them tell me about seeing a leaf-miner eating a leaf. I showed them how to use a sweep net, then we looked at what they caught in the microscope and it was the best thing ever. I loved it and this is what I was  meant to do.

One of the Master Naturalist projects I got involved with is Junior Master Naturalists. It’s basically what it sounds like: we have an after-school program with 5th and 6th graders, and share with them essentially the same topics we learn during our training. The organizers wanted them to keep an observation journal, but said that so few kids actually used theirs last year. I suggested making templates for observations that would help guide them through the process of recording nature, and replacing any and all powerpoint-style presentations with printing out pages they could put in their binder to reference later. To encourage them to actually make observations for their journals, I suggested having a passport-style check-in page, where they get a sticker for making observations between sessions. Since I suggested it, I took it upon myself to make the journal pages (and they turned out AWESOME). And I also took it upon myself to provide the stickers.

Yesterday was the first Junior Master Naturalist session. Last year, there were only 8 kids in the program. Yesterday, we were expecting 12 (already more than we anticipated!), but 17 kids showed up. The topic for the session was journaling and entomology. The activity: I handed out mystery specimens in cups, and the kids were to make their first observation of the bug in class by drawing it, describing what they saw, and writing about what they thought it was. I brought everything from a dotted wolf spider exuvia to eastern leaf-footed bug eggs. After making observations, we split into three groups. Two groups got to look at specimens in the microscopes: a female butterfly that had died and had part of her abdomen eaten away, so you can see the eggs inside her (!!), and a cluster of Zelus assassin bug eggs that had been parasitized by wasps. The third group got to huddle around the tank of caterpillars I brought, which also had a stick insect nymph, a leaf beetle, and a chrysalis. We talked about molting, camouflage, parasites, and all sorts of things. 

At the very end of the session, I went around and gave everybody their stickers for writing their first journal entry. They LOVED them.

I had initially bought these for myself (I mean, come on), but when the idea of the journals came up, I knew what these had to be used for. I have a lot of frustration about science information being dumbed down for kids, and a lot of my struggles with entomology now are because I was always told something completely incorrect when I was a kid. That’s why I’m really focused on being scientifically accurate when explaining things, even if they’re a little complicated. But it’s hard when you’re dealing with things with animals on them, because the designers have usually never seen a bug/fish/bird in their lives so the items are woefully inaccurate. It’s impossible to find anatomically correct insects on clothing, as toys, as stickers, etc., so when I saw these stickers I HAD to buy them.

I’ll probably never know what kind of effect I’m having on the kids I interact with at events like these, but I hope what I share with them will encourage them to explore science and nature on their own as they get older, and stay unapologetically as excited about these things as I am. Shoutout to @marycapaldi for these amazing stickers.

Oh, and PS: Master Naturalists have milestones when you reach a certain number of volunteer hours. You need 40 a year to stay certified, and you get a special pin when you reach 250, 500, 1000, etc hours. I’m getting my 250 hour pin at our next meeting. Hoping to get my 500 hour pin by the end of winter. :)

October 6, 2017

[swanqueeneverafter]

13. Hat Trick, Pt.3

Enchanted Forest. Past. (Jefferson meets with the Evil Queen at her castle. He enters with the hat box and is escorted by several guards.) Evil Queen: “Jefferson. So good to see you looking more like yourself. I assume you’re here because you’ve reconsidered my offer?” Jefferson: “I want your guarantee. That, if I do what you ask, my daughter will want for nothing.” Evil Queen: “You have my word. Now, let’s open that box of yours and see what it can do. (He pulls a top hat out of the box:) I do so like a man who dresses for the occasion.” (Jefferson places the hat on the floor and spins it. It begins to spin on its own.) Jefferson: “Step back. (The hat forms a purple vortex:) After you!” Evil Queen: “Together!” (They link arms.) Jefferson: “Hold on!” (They both jump into the vortex and are transported elsewhere.) Storybrooke. Jefferson’s House. Present. (Jefferson brings Emma to a room with several top hats lining the walls.) Emma: “I don’t know what you think you’re doing, but if you hurt my friend, I swear I’ll make you regret it.” Jefferson: “Hurt her? I’m saving her life.” Emma: “How do you figure that?” Jefferson: “Don’t play stupid. We both know what happens when people try to leave Storybrooke.” Emma: “What are you talking about?” Jefferson: “The curse.” Emma: “What curse?” Jefferson: “The one keeping us all trapped. All except you.” Emma: “Have you been reading Henry’s book?” Jefferson: “Henry? You mean the Queen’s father?” Emma: “Henry, the mayor’s kid.” Jefferson: “Oh, Henry. Your Henry. And his book of stories. The ones that you choose to ignore. Maybe, if you knew what I know, you wouldn’t.” Emma: “Why have you been spying on me?”

Jefferson: “Because, for the last twenty-eight years, I’ve been stuck in this house. Day after day, always the same. Until one night, you, in your little yellow bug, roll into town, and the clock ticks, and things start to change. You see… I know what you refuse to acknowledge, Emma. You’re special. You brought something precious to Storybrooke – magic.” Emma: “You’re insane.” Jefferson: “Because I speak the truth?” Emma: “Because you’re talking about magic.” Jefferson: “I’m talking about what I’ve seen. Perhaps, you’re the one that’s mad.” Emma: “Really?” Jefferson: “What’s crazier than seeing and not believing? Because that’s exactly what you’ve been doing since you got to our little hamlet. Open your eyes. Look around. Wake up. Isn’t it about time?” Emma: “What do you want?” Jefferson: “I want you to get it to work.” (Jefferson sits Emma down in front of a table of sewing supplies and materials.) Emma: “You want me to get what to work?” Jefferson: “You’re the only one that can do this. You’re going to get it to work.” Enchanted Forest. Past. (Jefferson and the Evil Queen end up inside Jefferson’s hat. There are several different coloured doors lining the walls.) Evil Queen: “I forgot how magnificent you are.” Jefferson: “I’m not here to relive the past. I’m here for my daughter. (He points toward a door made of glass:) Here – this is the entrance. It’s important that we stick together. Same amount of people that go through have to come back. No more, no less. It’s the hat’s rule, not mine.” Evil Queen: “I understand.” Wonderland. Past. (They enter through the mirrored door and arrive in Wonderland. Along the path, they encounter the Caterpillar.) Caterpillar: “Who are you? Who? Who?” Jefferson: “I hate Wonderland.” Storybrooke. Jefferson’s House. Present. (Emma and Jefferson are still in the sewing room.) Jefferson: “Make one like that.” Emma: “You want me to make a hat? You don’t have enough?” Jefferson: “Well, none of them work, do they? Or else you wouldn’t be here. Now, make a hat, and get it to work.” Emma: “I don’t-” Jefferson: “You have magic. You can do it.” Emma: “The hats, the tea, your psychotic behavior… You think you’re the Mad Hatter.” Jefferson: “My name’s Jefferson.” Emma: “Okay. You’ve clearly glommed onto my kid Henry’s thing. They’re just stories. The Mad Hatter is in Alice in Wonderland – a book. A book I actually read.” Jefferson: “Stories. Stories? What’s a story? When you were in high school, did you learn about the Civil War?” Emma: “Yeah, of course.” Jefferson: “How? Did you read about it, perchance, in a book? How is that any less real than any other book?” Emma: “History books are based on history.” Jefferson: “And storybooks are based on what? Imagination? Where does that come from? It has to come from somewhere. You know what the issue is with this world? Everyone wants some magical solution for their problem, and everyone refuses to believe in magic. Now, get it to work.” Emma: “Here’s the thing, Jefferson – this is it. This is the real world.” Jefferson: “A real world. How arrogant are you to think yours is the only one? There are infinitely more. You have to open your mind. They touch one another, pressing up in a long line of lands. Each just as real as the last. All have their own rules. Some have magic, some don’t. And some need magic. Like this one. And that’s where you come in. You and your friend are not leaving here, until you make my hat. Until you get it to work.” Emma: “And then what?” Jefferson: “Then I go home.”

Wonderland. Past. (Jefferson and the Evil Queen come to a hedge maze.) Jefferson: “You want to go in there?” Evil Queen: “What I want is a short walk through.” Jefferson: “A short walk? You know who this belongs to.” Evil Queen: “The Queen of Hearts. She’s not one for subtlety.” Jefferson: “This wasn’t part of our deal. You know what she does to anyone that crosses her.” Evil Queen: “Indeed. Better than most. You can’t leave Wonderland without me. Two go through, two go back. You’re not going to let the Queen of Hearts keep you from returning to your daughter, are you? (Jefferson says nothing and begins to follow her:) That’s what I thought.” Jefferson: “Wait. (He picks up a branch from the ground and throws it towards one of the walls. The hedge grabs the branch and pulls it into the wall:) Stay away from the walls.” Evil Queen: “I’ve got a better idea. The walls should stay away from me.” (The Evil Queen magically creates a fireball, and blasts a path through the maze. The two of them proceed until they reach a vault containing a wall of hearts like the Evil Queen’s. She pulls a drawer open and takes out the box.) Jefferson: “Okay? You got what you need. Shall we?” (The two of them go to leave, but are suddenly ambushed by several of the Queen of Hearts’ guards.) Guard: “Trespassers! Halt!” (Jefferson and the Evil Queen begin to run through the hedge maze. The guards follow and try to stop them, but are thwarted by the Evil Queen’s magic. They run back to the burned path, where the Evil Queen magically causes the hedges to reform. They end up back at the mirrored door they entered through.) Jefferson: “The Looking Glass! There it is!” (Jefferson sees that the Evil Queen has stopped.) Jefferson: “C- What are you doing? We can’t stop now. We got to get out of here.” Evil Queen: “There’s something I need to do first.” (She breaks off a piece of mushroom.) Evil Queen: “A little snack.” Jefferson: “Are you mad? Do you know what the food here does?” Evil Queen: “I’m well aware.” (The Evil Queen sets the opened box on the ground and places the piece of mushroom inside. Purple smoke emerges from the box and materializes into Henry I.) Evil Queen: “Oh, daddy!” Jefferson: “This is what she took from you? Your father?” Evil Queen: “The Queen of Hearts has always seen me as a threat. So, she wanted some leverage. I got it back.” Henry I: “The Queen’s soldiers – we must hurry.” Jefferson: “You knew only two can go through the hat… Which is why you didn’t tell me about your father.” Evil Queen: “It was the only way to make sure you’d help me.” (Jefferson tries to chase after them, but his feet are swallowed by the ground.) Jefferson: “Wait! Wait! Wait, please. My daughter… My Grace… She’s… She’s waiting for me. I promised her I’d… I’d be home for tea.” Evil Queen: “A promise which you now have broken. If you truly cared for your daughter, you never would’ve left her in the first place. You were right, Jefferson. You don’t abandon family.” (The Evil Queen and her father go through the mirrored door.) Jefferson: “No! No…” (The Queen of Hearts’ men finally catch up to Jefferson. Two of the guards drag him away.) Knave of Hearts: “Take him to the Queen.”

Enchanted Forest. Past. (Prince Charming barges through the front doors of Rumpelstiltskin’s estate.) Prince Charming: “Rumpelstiltskin! Show yourself.” (Rumpelstiltskin appears behind him.) Rumpelstiltskin: “Still dressing like a prince, I see. Even though you ran away from the life I gave you. How’s that for gratitude?” Prince Charming: “You gave me a prison sentence.” Rumpelstiltskin: “Yeah, one that you’ve now skirted. Careful, dearie – King George is a vengeful man.” Prince Charming: “I’m here about Snow. Rumour has it, she’s after the Queen and she came to you for help.” Rumpelstiltskin: “Yes, indeed.” Prince Charming: “What did you do to her?” (He draws his sword.) Rumpelstiltskin: “What did I do to her? You mean, what did you do to her. You caused her pain. Without that pain, she would never have drank my potion to forget about you. That’s what changed her.” Prince Charming: “Undo the potion. All magic can be broken.” Rumpelstiltskin: “Oh, yes. With twoo wuv.” Prince Charming: “So, that’s it then? True love’s kiss will awaken her?” Rumpelstiltskin: “Most certainly. But, it’s going to be hard to kiss her when you don’t know where she is.” (Rumpelstiltskin swats Prince Charming’s sword and starts to walk away.) Prince Charming: “Name your price.” Rumpelstiltskin: “How about… your cloak?” Prince Charming: “My cloak? Why would you want my cloak?” Rumpelstiltskin: “It’s drafty in here.” (Prince Charming takes off his cloak and places it on the table.) Prince Charming: “Where is she?” Rumpelstiltskin: “On her way to the Queen’s Highway.” (He magically produces a map.) Rumpelstiltskin: “This is the route she’s taking, but you better be quick. Because, if she kills the Queen, she becomes as evil as the woman whose life she takes.” Prince Charming: “She could never become that evil.” Rumpelstiltskin: “Evil isn’t born, dearie – it’s made. If Snow starts down that road, you’ll never get her back.” (Snow White is preparing herself at the spot that Rumpelstiltskin specified. Suddenly, Prince Charming ambushes her from behind.) Snow White: “Get your hands off me!” Prince Charming: “Snow.” Snow White: “Who are you? What are you doing?” Prince Charming: “I’m helping you remember. (He kisses her:) I told you – I will always find you.” (Snow White punches him in the head, causing him to fall unconscious.)