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#the amount also depends entirely on the person paying
godofthestupid · 4 months
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people here are really nice 'cus even though I'm a boyfailure™ of a barkeeper I still get more tipps than I should based purely on performance and also quality of the drinks
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stewystew · 2 months
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Holy shit i just found a part for an embroidery machine that I’ve been looking for for like four years
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lucysarah-c · 4 months
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Question: for Virgin! Canon Levi; how do you think that would go down? Like full blown sex one night? Taking it slow over time? Just how do you think reader would need to navigate it with him? Slow burn / build up, a passionate night, tipsy reader?
This is assuming Levi and Reader’s emotions are confirmed for each other
Hiiiii~~ How are you? What have you been up to lately?
Haha, honestly, I'm not entirely sure what caused this full blow-up of questions, but I'm kinda loving it.
Mhh, I think my answer depends a lot on two factors: "Levi's age" and "the experience of the reader." I know you said Canon Levi, but I wonder if you mean canon season 1-4 Levi, Underground Levi, pre-promotion Levi, etc. haha
I'll conclude that you meant "canon season 1-3" Levi. While I personally don't headcanon Captain Levi as a virgin during the "overall" period of AoT (I mean, since season 1, not ACWNR or Underground Levi), I think his reaction depends a lot on how much experience the reader has. Levi strikes me as one of those friends/partners who loves you, cares about you, etc., but hardly ever talks about themselves. In my humble opinion, even if Levi has feelings for you and you two decide to pursue a relationship together, it may take him a lot of time to open up about his past. I mean, this man gets along with Hange amazingly in the story; Isayama says that Hange is who "understands" or "gets along better with Levi," and yet Hange didn't know about Kenny.
So this may be a wild take… but I think Levi wouldn't tell you it's his first time, lmao. He may try to play it cool; you might notice he's not the most "skilled" dude out there ('cause let me tell you, no amount of Ackerman powers makes you seem experienced, lol), but he's not telling you it's his first time. Which, you know, everybody is entitled to their past. Perhaps if the reader is also a virgin and she opens up emotionally like, "It's my first time," Levi would feel she's opening up to him, and he would feel it's a good time to be honest too and be like, "Well… it's mine too, so I guess we will figure it out as we go."
About "how" it would be, I think the reader would have to set the tempo. Most men are READY to blow off some steam if you give them a chance, haha, so if the reader is also a virgin and they kinda want to test the waters before going all the way, Levi would be down for it, especially because it will give him time to catch a trick or two, learn what she likes.
I think that porn or movies make us believe how "sex" usually happens, and I mean, talking from my experience and my friends' experiences… none of us went from 0 to 10. Like, we kiss, we make out, then maybe we got a little handy, then riding on top of clothes, oral sex, fingers, etc. Especially because maybe you don't have your own place to crash at, maybe you two would like to talk it out before it happens. Buy condoms, get ready, etc.
Now, if you are curious how I think Underground Levi would decide to lose his V-card while younger… probably rather quick, steamy, and not giving it much thought, haha. He'd let the hormones talk and make decisions for him. In both occasions, I don't think he made the girl cum before him, which is something that happens a lot; we women are harder to please, it requires more technique than men who… well, let's say that they come rather easily, lol. BUT he will 100% offer to make her cum anyway, with fingers or mouth. Levi will be such a fast learner, give him a chance or two, and he will pick it up like a champ.
Though why can't I shake the idea of a younger Levi in the underground in his 18s, having something with a girl slightly older than him, perhaps 20, etc. And her saying between chuckles, "Slow down, boy."
God, I would pay to see his blushed, embarrassed face.
Link to my masterlist and my other works if you feel like checking them out. Tags!: @nube55 @justkon @notgoodforlife @nmlkys @humanitys-strongest-bamf @quillinhand @thoreeo @darkstarlight82 @angelofthor @aomi04 @levisbrat25 @l3visthighs @hum4n-wr3ckag3 @hannieslovebot @starrylevi @rithty @mariaace @ackrmntea @emilyyyy-08 @levisfavoriteteashop @katestrophes @levistealeaf @an-ever-angry-bi @youre-ackermine @fxnnyackerman @secretmoneybearvoid @trashblackrainbow @flxrartsstuff @katharinasdiaryy @levisecretgfblog @searriously @blackdxggr @ackermanswifee @abiatackerman @braunsbabe @moonchild-12345 @levicansteponme @galactict3a Wanna join my tag list? Here!
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voidpumpkin · 2 years
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A Guide For New Users Fleeing From Twitter, From A User Who Needed One When They First Started:
Hi to everyone fleeing from twitter, Elon Musk is shit and he already has had an actively harmful effect on the site, one that will only get worse. So, welcome to Tumblr, it can be kind of intimidating, given its reputation and how many different features there are, I was certainly confused and intimidated when I first logged on and as I'm active on both I sympathise with y’all, so here’s a guide to anyone new:
Put your hashtags in the hashtag section. This is the only way they’ll actually have any sort of effect, or appear when you search for something. Don’t post them on the post itself.
There is a character limit for hashtags and a quite high hashtag limit. Go wild. Writing entire speeches is common. 
Don’t tag lots of unrelated stuff to your posts, that’ll get you reported for Spam and just hated in general
Don’t censor words, users are fine with swearing, doing so especially with triggering content makes it hard for people to limit their exposure to said triggering content.
There’s no such thing as ratioing.
We don’t have quote retweeting, every reblog, comment, etc counts to op’s post. They can see it all, and will be notified depending on their notification settings.
Change your icon, people will think you’re a bot if you use the default.
Give yourself a bio, it’ll make you look like a person.
Follow people and tags, that’s the only way you’re gonna see the content you wanna see. The foryoupage isn’t to be trusted.
Actually reblog stuff, liking has no effect, reblogging is the only important thing here as there is no like based algorithm. Doing so will also make you appear human.
You can hide your likes and who you’re following. Doing so is not frowned upon in the slightest.
You can block tags, similarly to muting words on twitter.
You can have multiple blogs tied to one account. 
You can customise your blog, go wild.
There is no word limit, you can write as you want. But if it gets too long make use of the keep reading feature, (the three dots beside the add gif feature)
There is an image limit of thirty, up from the former ten, though for some they may be stuck at only using ten, tumblr is kinda inconsistent. If you want to add more you’ll have to reblog your own post. 
There is no reblogging limit when it comes to a post, though there is a daily posting limit, go wild, only your followers will be upset.
You can have videos, gifs and pictures in the same post.
You can just post audio.
Adult content is still banned, but actual moderation and enforcement is spotty, especially if it’s written. 
Spam liking and reblogging isn’t a thing. Go wild.
You have an ask box that people can submit stuff to. You can respond or just delete the post. You can remove anon capability from it (which will get rid of most of the hate), or outright bar it.
You can’t private your account but you can restrict commenting and reblogging. Edit: I’ve been informed that you can in fact make your blog password protected, it’s just that it’s a rarely done thing and not widely known.
Block whoever and whenever, it’s not a big deal. Though if someone you’ve blocked has reblogged and added to a post and someone you follow reblogs that, their commentary will still be included in the post you see.
We don’t have muting, only blocking.
Yes, direct messaging is a thing (it’s the little smiley face)
The only way to promote your is through ‘tumblr blaze’, you pay a certain amount of money and your post will be promoted, but not targeted, so no invasions of privacy. You are subject to the employee’s whims on whether or not it gets promoted and unfortunately hate speech has been allowed.
Tumblr has tendency to hide/consume comments, posts and asks, don’t be surprised if they go missing.
Tumblr searching a blog relies on tags, words in the post and the users name, keep that in mind.
Posts will remain after you delete your account or the original post if they have been reblogged.
Years old posts are still circulating and that is considered normal.
You can queue up posts to be released when you’re not using your account. Or you can just post whenever you’re active. Go wild.
Wizards exist and are very popular on this site. Accept it.
There are posts with no notes that will never gain any more than a sing note for your like. Accept it.
There are posts will no op. Accept it.
Trans and autistic people dominate this site.
Don’t get pissy when someone tags a post ‘tw (insert slur)’, or any trigger warning for that matter, most are just being considerate of their followers who may be triggered by such content.
Twitter discourse is regularly mocked, it’s not gonna fly here.
No, we don’t call each other oomfs, or anything like that. We just have mutuals.
Tumblr in general lacks a lot colloquialisms that began on twitter.
We do have ‘blorbo’ ‘poor little meow meow’ etc.
Trying to go viral or trying to corporate is frowned upon.
Tumblr has a tendency to blacklist things tagged like ‘crowdfunding’ so bring that kind of logic you use for twitter posts over to tumblr.
We don’t have twitter circles, co-posting, etc.
Tumblr is surprisingly good at recommending blogs.
There are no verified accounts, and your follower count isn't visible. This is a good thing, trying to change it will get you laughed at.
People are going to just make up stuff, don’t believe everything you see and if it’s a claim about someone, investigate it rather than just believe it.
You can edit your posts after you’ve posted them, but the versions reblogged before said changes will still circulate. This editing of the original has been used as a spruce of comedy
If your worried about people seeing your potentially triggering, or even graphic content and they haven’t blocked the tags you’ve used you can use the keeping reading feature to put the content under the cut and post a warning at the top.
And this is quite important:
Stay anonymous and have fun. There isn’t an expectation to constantly expose inner details of your life, you aren’t expected to use your real face, your real name, age, etc. You’re not even expected to be truthful here. Exist however you wanna exist and have fun, that should be the point of social media. 
Also keep in mind that tumblr has its own distinct culture that is going to take some getting used to. As well as a history any user who’s been here a while will at least somewhat understand.
Also I'll be editing the post with additional info and corrections provided to me.
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gotham-daydreams · 1 year
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Weird to say, but I think I'm pretty forgiving of Damien. Yeah, he's rude and ignores the reader, but he probably does the same to everyone else lmao. With Dick who pays careful attention to everyone, it's a betrayal that he would neglect the reader because he should have been an older sibling. Plus Damien is like ten, it's kinda hard for me to hold him accountable when he grew up without knowing better and he's just emulating older members of the family. I'm pretty sure this is how youngest sibling privilege works lol
Yeah, I completely agree! Even then, it can be difficult to know that what you're doing is wrong when you see the people you admire and respect doing the same thing.
Like you said, Damian, in reality, is probably rude to everyone else and ignores them from time to time too. Though for the sake of the "Not [ ]" series, he just so happens to ignore the reader a little more when compared to the rest of the Batfam. Which can still be chalked up to him just following the mannerisms of the family without even thinking much about it.
Regardless, neglect is still neglect and what happened to the reader still isn't right- but I do kind of agree with you that Damian probably holds the least amount of capability. He's young, and you can't really expect him to fully be aware of the effects his actions have on other people, especially when that person:
1. Hasn't expressed how negatively the whole situation has effected them, and they don't exactly appreciate their entire existence getting ignored by so many people. (Which is valid and understandable! Because how can you expect someone who's been ignoring you for so long to not only listen to you, but even acknowledge you enough to notice you have something important to say? How can you expect someone so seemingly set on ignoring you, to care? You can't. So the reader stays quiet, but it is something worth pointing out, I feel.)
2. Again, sees that everyone around them pretty much does the same thing. So it's more of a "if they're doing it, it must be for a reason, so I'll do it too" (since Dick and Bruce are also ignoring you, and Damian actually cares about both of them).
Damian is the least aware that what he did was wrong to begin with because no one told it was, and those around him almost seemed to enable that behavior by continuing to do it themself.
I'd like to believe that maybe his behavior would've changed if he knew how badly it was effecting the reader, but that's also to assume that the others wouldn't. Though who knows?
As for everyone else? They're way past old enough to know that what they're doing is wrong. The neglect as a whole was a "team effort", and even if they won't consider it that, it basically was. All of them neglected you except for Alfred, and they all did it over the course of nearly the reader's entire stay at the Manor. If anyone should've known, it should've been them, and depending on your interpretation of the situation and everything - some are more at fault for neglecting the reader when compared to others.
Especially if they seemingly didn't ignore and tried to spend time with/bond with other members of the family, but the reader just didn't make the cut time and time again.
Like you said — Dick is easily one of the worst offenders simply because he's loving and all this stuff to the Batfam, but just not to the reader —and especially when compared to Damian who was just none the wiser for the most part.
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bouquetface · 2 months
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Composite Chart Observations
Accuracy influenced by entire chart.
Scorpio 12th H.
12th H can indicate potential reasons a couple breaks up. In this case, it was due to cheating. Scorpio indicates issues with secrets, power dynamics & control.
Capricorn 2nd H.
These couples tend to be cautious when spending. It’s best for both parties when an equal amount is being spent by each.
Ex: I’ll pay for this and you pay next time. I’ll cook dinner and you will wash dishes.
However, entire chart must be taken into consideration. Cap 2nd H can mean a couple with traditional values/roles.
Moon in 3rd H.
Communication brings you closer. You feel listened to and understood. Especially when in an air sign, you can discuss anything with each other. You can like to debate as well. A best friend kind of relationship.
Moon placement.
imo moon placement can tell you if it is possible for the couple to end on good times (if they end)
Ex: Aqua Moon - in composite I’ve seen twice as the couple eventually letting things go & being causal acquaintances/friends.
Ex: Scorpio Moon - the only way the two would stay friends is because one or both want to keep tabs on the other.
6th H Aries.
The two may be prone to fighting throughout the day. Having physical hobbies/outlets is a good manifestation of this. Couple that works together to solve problems.
Ex: Doing home repairs together. Gym couple.
Moon in 6th.
Sensitive to one another throughout the day. One person may feel they’re putting in all the effort. One person may feel the other’s expectations from them are unrealistic.
The two can become critical of each other. They may keep their true negative feelings inside until they blow up. Or depending on sign, they let their feelings be known leading to fights.
Scorpio First House.
You are meant to transform in this relationship. There can be a lot of passion and intensity. Change may feel painful. One person may feel controlled.
There may be unbalanced power dynamic. Ex: One person is older. One person is more experienced. One person is more accomplished in career. One person has authority over you.
I’ve also noticed in these relationships (regardless of whether this platonic or romantic) one person is more aware of the other. I’m avoiding using the word stalking because that implies it’s always in a negative way. What I mean is one person has likely admired the other for a while.
Venus in 2nd.
Good for business relationships. The two value wealth. If afflicted, the two spend recklessly when in a relationship.
To feel secure in the connection, physical and/or materialistic things may be important. Being generous with affection and gifts. Feeling more confident in the relationship.
Mars in 2nd.
Similar to Venus in 2nd, this is either good for making money or indicating spending too much.
In this connection, the two take their time with each other. A no pressure relationship. If badly afflicted, one person is faking it. They want more now. The other is not offering it.
On the bright side, maintaining attraction is more easy for this couple. Physically affectionate. Possessive of one another.
Sun in 2nd.
Another indicator of being good business partners. If you have similar values, this is a good placement. If you don’t, you can try to convince the other. This can lead to issues. This can be the kind of relationship where one thinks they can fix/convince the other over time.
On the bright side, the two of you can value things that last. Wanting to create a legacy with each other. Wanting to be respected. Physical expression is important to feel secure.
Sag 2nd H.
You can become open minded in this relationship. A willingness to try things a new way. In the 2nd, this can either be good or bad for finances. The two will be very generous with each other. If you can afford it, all is well. If you can’t, you can have financial problems.
Mercury in 3rd.
Communication is easy between the two of you. Mercury is in the home it rules. The two are comfortable. They feel understood. They have no problem talking about “difficult” topics.
This can change based on entire chart. For ex: Cap 3rd H. You two can be reserved in communication. Thinking about what you wan to say, predicting how it will be perceived before speaking. You may have issues with being vulnerable.
Libra 3rd H.
You may like to debate each other. Conversations are flirty. May tell white lies to make each other happy.
The two may avoid difficult conversations to keep the peace. Protect the moment by repressing negative feelings rather than communicating.
Aqua 4th H.
The foundation can be unstable. There may times where one or both are unsure about the future. The two may have a non traditional start. On the bright side, relationship can be built on the foundation of respect for one another’s intelligence, interests/hobbies & uniqueness.
Saturn in 7th.
Saturn will test the relationship. The tests will bring you closer. Strengthening the connection. Assuring both are committed. However, the tests can lead to disharmony.
Saturn in 10th.
This can be one of the better placements for saturn. The planet is naturally associated with the 10th. This can make the couple appear traditional. The two are responsible & ambitious when together. You can help one another reach goals. Good sign of a long term partnership too.
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xkseii · 1 year
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The magnificent bird and the golden cage
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— Including: nsfw (-17)
— Warnings: gn reader, toxic behavior & manipulation from both reader and Otoya, unhealthy relationship, cheating.
— Summary: Who is the magnificent bird in the gold cage, and who keeps him locked there.
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Part 3 -> Don Lorenzo, Tabito Karasu & Eita Otoya
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✖︎ You are the gentle falconer, and he is the lovely Magpie.
— Don Lorenzo is a man who lived a difficult life. As he was born into a miserable household, abandoned by his parents, living on the streets for a long period of time… It’s no wonder that Lorenzo kept a difficult relationship and point of view on money, even if he can live comfortably now. His obsession with money represent a huge part of his personality, and he can’t help but never be satisfied with what he has, the internalized fear of losing all his money and ending up on the street again is eating him from the inside.
— Meeting you did not change him, his fear still eating him alive and distracting his mind. Even if your close relationship did not affect his traumatized self, it still changed a few of his habits. The fact that you were earning less than him and lived a pretty average life was stressing him out, he started to fear that you would end up without money at some point if you stop working, or get injured. Every week, he can’t help but transfer a specific amount of money, which is higher if you got sick or went on holiday during the previous week.
— You didn’t want to take advantage of his fear and only put his money on the side, without using it, keeping it only for an emergency. When you hang out with Lorenzo, and often Snuffy, neither of them let you pay. At first, it was always Snuffy paying for the three of you, then, Lorenzo took the habit of paying sometimes. The second you take out your credit card, your hand is slapped away without any care, so in exchange, you regularly buy them gifts, such as golden items for Lorenzo, football related items, or cute decorations for his apartment.
— The moment you started dating, he was very much always with you. You work from home as much as you can, he brings you to his practice when you aren’t busy, he follows you around in the morning. After all, Lorenzo doesn’t just have an obsession on money, but also on love and affection, since he lacked this part of a relationship his entire life. Hand holding is necessary for him, resting his chin on your shoulder is a must, the sensation of having you close to him physically and mentally.
— You rapidly move in together, and instantly, he creates a joined bank account for you two. Lorenzo often tends to give you money if you do something for him, buys you anything that he thinks will suit you. A few of his teammates were convinced that you were only with him for money, until they notice what was your kind of dynamic you had together: the constant wholesome reassurance, the support you always give each other, the almost childish way of teasing the other to bring a smile to their face. You had the most healthy relationship possible, even with your shared or distinct experiences and trauma.
— In the end, you keep Lorenzo in the most comfortable cage, filled with silk pillows and most expensive food. He is more dependent of you than you are dependent of him, but it didn’t create an unbalanced or one-sided relationship. You have different love language, and both give the most love to the other as possible, while trying to learn how to grow past the difficult experiences together.
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✖︎ You locked each other in the same golden cage.
— Karasu has that habit of looking down on people he deems as ‘mediocre’, but it isn’t to the liking of everyone. And it certainly wasn’t to your liking. And the fact that he uses his sharp tongue to insult friend or foe without any distinction only annoyed you more. There was this sensation of sheer annoyance sweeping through you whenever he opens his mouth to say something else than something about the game itself.
— Your relationship with Karasu started off the wrong foot, with a mutual annoyance that eat away your similar play style. You could be working so well together, but your behavior and temper made it impossible to even stand in the same room without glaring at each other.
— Though, you are both perfectionist, and both dislike when something well planned goes wrong. Whenever it’s important or not, and make a difference or not, you both react the same way: complain and say what went wrong. And it was the only moment you both understood each other perfectly, while the others thought that you were dramatic and always complaining. This is how you managed to more or less get along, externalize the frustration of a situation by talking to each other, and exactly getting where it was bothering the other. It was a pretty therapeutic way of relaxing, and you both wordlessly agreed to listen to each other when one of you needed it.
— You start to spend more time with each other, spending a good hour everyday just talking to each other and talking out any trouble or something that annoys you. It went to the point when you couldn’t even imagine talking to someone else about all of this, even for a short instant, it was engraved in your brain that you could just come up to Karasu and start talking. It was the same for him, and the rest of your teammates were surprised when they almost never heard neither of you complain many times per day anymore.
— This habit turned into dependence for each other's presence, and it became a daily need that could lead to extreme frustration if it wasn't given. When the new Selection began, you were both separated and both your mood were the worst anyone had ever seen. Karasu was complaining about every little thing, his sharp tongue turned deadly, his insults becoming harsher, more frequent and towards absolutely everyone. On your side, it wasn't any better if it was from a collective agreement to let the players walk around when they weren't training, so you could see each other.
— You never really began any romantic relationship, but this dependence to the other led to being together almost all the time. A game of control and reassurance between the two of you, since you didn't want the other to go see someone else, and it was the same for the other. It was a constant push into following your ideas, meaning that even if one of you were having a bad and dangerous idea, the other would constantly support them without trying to direct them onto a better path.
— This dynamic based on reassurance, mutual frustration, anger, and need for perfection was utterly unhealthy but also led to a reassurance and support that was greatly needed. In the end, you were so similar that you held onto each other even in the worst decision and time.
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✖︎ You are the falconer, he is the Smith scribe.
— Eita Otoya, a professional cheater. You have no idea how it happened, but you ended up going out with him only to get cheated on and broken with because he was too 'bored'. It wasn't even a proper break up, as he just sent you a text saying that it was over between you.
— The frustration only grew when you saw him get more and more partner, never learning the lesson, despite the fact that he was getting slapped almost every time. This blatant disrespect, the number of hearts you saw him break made you want to get revenge, or at least, get him to understand what he was doing to those poor souls. You had a few mutual friends with him, and you more or less know what he was becoming and hear more details about his recent behavior.
— Without any surprise, none of his previous partners would ever be willing to get in contact with him again, and you ended up being the first one to do so. On the note of wanting to just catch up with him and hear about how he was doing, a kind-of date at a coffee shop was decided, and you saw him face-to-face for the first time in months. His lack of shame was even worse than you thought, as he proudly said that he didn't have any partner, even if you knew he currently had a girlfriend.
— Meeting him at this coffee shop felt more like a date than anything else, he was being as flirty as when you met him, and he behaved like he was trying to win you over again. It irked you so much but kept calm, in the few months between your break-up, he didn't change in the slightest and tried to use the same cheap tricks to get you to go out with him again or spend a night together.
— You accepted the implied offer, and spent the night with him. But unlike what he was expecting, you weren't all over him the night morning, you just put on your clothes after grabbing something to drink and left. Otoya that was so used to get and keep the attention of his partner until he cheated felt lost, like he had lost a game against you and his ego really badly took the hit. And you gained an Otoya running after you while trying to not make it obvious, doing everything to get your attention and get into a relationship again.
— His ego when he saw you with someone else, seeming to have fun and be into a nice relationship, was the biggest blow. It was like telling him he was good enough for a night, but he wasn't deserving to be officially with you, only a guy on the side when you felt bored. He gave even more efforts into getting you to pay attention to him, pushing any flirt away to focus on getting you, which started a game of cat and mouse, but the mouse was actually a dog waiting to strike.
— You gave attention to Otoya for a day, before ghosting him, gave him attention again, before being seen with someone else. It lasted for weeks, until you finally accepted to go out with him. Your previous behavior was forcing him to always only be with you, from the fear of seeing you leave with someone else. And in the end, Otoya has been trapped into his own game of flirting and cheating.
— Even if you weren't planning on cheating on him, since you didn't want to be the same kind of bastard as him… You let the anxiousness of it growing at the back of his mind, soothing his heart when you felt that it was getting to him too much. You didn't know for how long it will last, but for now, he had been a loyal boyfriend to you.
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— Thank you for reading! I wish you a great day.
— here is my masterlist & ko-fi —
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spongeofaces · 29 days
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Matchup exchange for @thecurrator 1/3
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First of the three matchups! I'm sorry for taking so long with these 🙇‍♀️
Really loved the one you made by the way, super cute.
Hope it lives up to your expectations!
Do tell me if I made any errors, I'll fix it up right away.
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Romantic
I match thecurrator with...
🐉 Malleus Draconia 🐉
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-:-:-:-
Malleus may be an absolute sweetheart of a partner, but he is also new to this kind of relationship. He does try his best, however he may not always know what is expected of him; what's too much or too little. Just be patient with him, okay? He'd wait an eternity for you, after all.
Typically, Malleus talks to others in a respectful yet somewhat cold tone, but fortunately he's comfortable enough around you to drop the polite walls he's built up. At times, he may find himself making small jokes or teasing comments that he usually wouldn't make with anyone else. Slowly yet surely, he'll become more and more willing to act childish if he wishes to, not feeling the same shame he used to when he acted in such a way. You've helped him become a lot more open with his words and actions, and he appreciates that.
As someone who has had personal experience with feeling isolated for a long time, Malleus has made it his personal mission to make sure that as long as the two of you are together, you'll never feel lonely. He needs you to know that no matter the situation, no matter the time, he is willing to be by your side. There's no need to hesitant or worry if you want to ask Malleus to spend time with you, I assure you; he'd drop anything if it meant he could be with you instead.
Malleus can take on any role in a conversation, switching between speaking and listening depending on the current mood. Whenever you speak, he is sure to pay his utmost attention, treasuring the words that leave your lips, storing away any and all information you give him in his head. You may make a one-off comment about a show you sort of like, and a day or two later he'll be bringing it up, having watched some of it to learn more about your tastes. Whether you feel like fast-paced banter, meaningful conversation, sudden rants or complete silence, Malleus is always happy to oblige.
This guy does not hold back on the compliments, always finding some sort of excuse to praise you. No matter how mudane a task you complete is he'll have something positive to say about you. Just by the look of utter adoration in his eyes, you can tell that it isn't empty flattery; he means every word of it. At this point, you find that he's truly enamoured with even your smallest actions and behaviours.
Definitely a gift giver. He'll experiment with different types of gifts, trying to get a read on which kind of trinket you treasure most. At the start, he'll stick to the default gifts, flowers, jewellery, clothes, plushies. The only thing that isn't stereotypical about the gifts he gives, is the amount. You'll be recieving something every other day, some things small, some things large. His gifts will become more personalized as he learns more about you.
He adores spending time participating in your interests with you. He'll organize movie nights or days to binge entire shows, just so he can listen as you discuss the themes and delve into the characters.
He is not going to help with your habit of getting lost in new places, if I'm honest. Pretty sure he'll just play dumb and let you lead you both off-track, feigning ignorance when you ask if he has any clue which way to go. Oh, but he doesn't have any malicious intent, he just finds the act of going on a simple, spontaneous walk with you pleasant.
He'd go absolutely anywhere if only you'd invite him. If he's the one choosing a date location, it would probably be somewhere out in nature, with a pretty view or scenery. He may start getting sappy and compare you to a flower or something, how you react to that is up to you.
Make him a music playlist, and it will be the only thing he listens to for practically the entire month. He might seek you out to talk to you about how he interprets certain lyrics and songs. He's grateful you took time out of your day to make something so thoughtful for him.
You two share the 'unapproachable' vibe. You because of the rbf, him because of his intimidating presence. But hey, at least you two know that the other isn't as scary as they look.
If you ever space out, he'll just sit in silence and watch you affectionately, wondering what could possibly be going through your mind at that moment. When class is about to start, he may poke your cheek to snap you out of the small daze.
Other options: Silver and Jade.
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talaricula · 1 year
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I'm seeing lots of speculation in the wake of the unwanted guest about whether absorbing Loveday's soul is what made Cytherea snap and sure, I see the theory, but personally as a cancer survivor I have never ever questioned why Cytherea snapped
Cancer is an existentially terrifying, often debilitatingly painful and/or exhausting illness, that, if not cured, takes over your body bit by bit, gets into the highly essential bits which increases the suffering and/or fundamentally changes you as a person, makes you extremely vulnerable and dependent on others, and almost inevitably kills you unless you get it when you're old enough and die of old age first instead. Its treatment is often just as painful and exhausting as the illness, or even more so, and doesn't always work. When you have cancer, there are two ways out: being cured (preferable) or, when that is not an option, deciding for yourself when you have reached the point where the suffering is so bad and the outlook so non existent that you would rather die now rather than later after even more and worse suffering.
And John took both of those options away from Cytherea and from her entire line of descendants. When he had the option to cure them all all along. Idk about y'all but the revelation in Nona that John could cure cancer was the number one earth shattering realisation for me. He did this to her, and to the entire Seventh House, on purpose.
This is the first giant betrayal to me. For generation after generation, for TEN THOUSAND YEARS, this man let the heirs of the Seventh House be sick for functionally their entire lives, likely starting in childhood, go through an incalculable amount of painful and exhausting experimental treatments bc he didn't even bring modern medicine into his New Order, and die in their twenties or thirties at best, when he could have STOPPED THIS ALL ALONG with little more effort than snapping his fingers.
Second big betrayal is towards Cytherea herself, but basically the same point : he could have cured her at any time. Before she became Lyctor, possibly, since we're not sure how static Lyctor bodies are, but Mercy's powers, Harrow's lobotomy and Ianthe's arm suggest that it would have been an option afterwards too. And he didn't. He let her have cancer for TEN THOUSAND years without curing her. And he calls himself her friend. Absolutely fuck that bastard.
Third big betrayal is the same betrayal that he inflicts on all the other Lyctors, but imo worse bc of Cytherea's illness. It seems from the books that Lyctors are, if obv not functionally immortal, at least Very Difficult to kill. Consequently, John demands Cytherea's loyalty not only in the form of killing the person she loves the most in the world, but in the very same act, in the form of cutting off the One escape route she has left out of the suffering he's purposefully keeping her in. In short, he takes the one person away from her who she perhaps doesn't resent depending on and, in the same act, makes it A Lot more difficult for her to choose euthanasia. (There's meta in this about the deeply realistic and also Terrifying ableism of John "admits openly that he'll pay any price so the people he loves can't leave him" making his sick friend dependent on him by keeping her sick, taking away her (arguable) main caretaker and cutting her off from the option of leaving him by dying.)
And at the same time that the other Lyctors realise John's betrayal re: their cavaliers, Cytherea potentially realises ALL OF THIS. TEN THOUSAND years of suffering, of seeing her House suffer, on top of losing the person she cares about the most, and ALL OF IT was avoidable, and not just avoidable but EASY TO AVOID? Is it any wonder she went on a rampage to bring down John and everything he cared about and had worked towards, and that she didn't care about dying at the end (or, perhaps, was even counting on that outcome)? I had cancer (as an aware adult) for a year in the best imaginable circumstances and am still fucked up about almost a decade later. After TEN THOUSAND YEARS and learning there had been another option all along, I'd have done WAY WORSE than Cytherea. I really don't think she needed to absorb anyone's soul to get there. It is, in my opinion, a deeply understandable and realistic reaction.
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imagine-that-100 · 1 year
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Chicken Shop Date | Part 5 |
By @imagine-that-100​ and @alovesreading​
Description: Matty Healy x Reader (Female) | You and your best friend Amelia came up with a very simple idea of taking celebrities on awkward chicken shop dates, and somehow, it’s managed to become both of your jobs. In the past, you’ve found sitting across from some of the biggest stars on the planet and eating chicken nuggets easy. But then Amelia manages to score you a date with the man who you’ve been obsessed with since you were nineteen; Matty Healy.
Word Count: 24.5k
A/N: Heyyyyyy, so this part is a lot. We really hope you enjoy Matty and Baby’s date! It’s finally New Year’s Eve, yayyyyyy!!! Me and A are going to go and find some holy water, but we hope you enjoy the new part and we can’t wait for your reactions. Thanks so much for reading x
| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 |
| N’s Masterlist | A’s Masterlist |
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~*~*~*~ New Year’s Eve ~*~*~*~
Today is finally the day.
After 3 long months, and this last week stretching on forever, it’s finally New Year’s Eve.
And you’re feeling every emotion under the sun.
Considering you love sleeping, you got such a small amount last night because of your nerves for today. You’re sure there was excitement in your system as well that made it difficult to stay asleep, but all you know for certain was that every time you woke up your heart was racing.
You think you probably got about 6 hours in total, but you were waking up every hour or so and when you saw that it was 8am you just decided to get up because there was no way you were getting back to sleep. And you willed the hours of the day to disappear, but time seemed to be moving agonisingly slowly.
Getting ready early is never really a thing you do but today after you showered, you started getting ready at 12:30 for your date which is at 4:30. It’s probably one of the stupidest things you could have done because you had already planned your outfit with Amelia the day before and it doesn’t take you a long time to do your hair or make up.
You were ready by 2 o’clock, but you held off from putting your outfit on because you didn’t want to crumple it as you sat lounging around waiting for the time to tick away. And today time seemed to be moving even slower than it had done the past week.
How you wish you had both decided to go out even earlier so you weren’t wishing your day away.
The only thing that made the time pass a little quicker was the text you received from Matty at about 2:45 saying, If you stand me up I’m coming to your flat and making you pay for it xx
That eliminated some of your nerves because in the back of your mind there was always that seed of doubt that this date might never happen and you’d get stood up. You’d been burnt before a few years ago and the worry never really left on each actual date you’d been on since.
To keep things lighthearted, you remind him of your words from a few months earlier, Like I said I’m a professional, I’d never stand someone up x
Think of my reputation, I wouldn’t damage it. You know far too many people… You also quickly add, and just to tease him that little bit more before you see him again, you send, How would I ever get my date with George?? xxx
You can picture the way he probably bites his tongue and shakes his head when he reads that last one come through on his phone. And you’re certain it probably happened like that because his response is, You’re a little bitch xx
Thank you, I know x You reply, giggling the entire time.
God, you really can’t wait to be in his presence again. It’s bad just how much you’re craving it at this point.
You decide to tease him just once more before your date because you know you’re just putty in his hand when you’re in person, so you reply, Although, depends on what the payment is because sounds interesting xx
But even his response now makes your cheeks heat up and you want to squeal into your hands, Don’t tease or we won’t make it to the date x
Grinning like a Cheshire Cat, you text him back saying, Exactly why you’re not picking me up and I’m meeting you there xx
4:30 on the dot or there will be consequences Miss Y/L/N xx He warns you again, but it makes you even more cheeky, and you can’t stop yourself from replying accordingly.
See you at 4:31 xxx
When you check the time again after that, it’s 3 and now you can’t stop yourself from getting ready. You lay your outfit out on your bed early which mostly consists of your Miu Miu clothes that you were given.
You wanted that on to tease him with, as you know that was one of your Instagram pictures that he liked. But the weather was far too cold for a mini skirt, so instead you chose black leather pants to accompany your black bralette, which pretty much acts like a crop top, and blazer.
And just to add to it, you decided the only accessory you’d be wearing would be a black ribbon that you’re going to tie around your neck in a bow, like a choker. And you’re definitely doing this because as soon as you even mentioned it, Amelia agreed.
After slipping your Louis Vuittons on, you’re pretty much ready to go. The only thing left to do is for the clock to tick down and you’ll finally be able to have your second date with Matty Healy.
What the fuck is your life?
~*~*~*~
Getting to the restaurant a little early probably wasn’t the best for Matty’s nerves, even if it only was ten minutes. Because he lives in North, he decided that he needed to give it at least an hour and twenty minutes for the hour drive it was to get to Brixton from his.
He was so eager to leave his house after getting ready though that he wasn’t fussed about the time. But now waiting for you to arrive is slowly eating him alive.
Like you, Matty didn’t sleep well either. Although, that’s quite usual for him, last night was beyond a joke. It was almost 4am before he fell asleep the first time, and he’d woken up every hour or so filled with nerves before forcing himself back to sleep.
He got a 3 solid hours of sleep in around 7am and he woke up a little after 10am feeling a little more refreshed and he decided he should probably get ready for the day. He showered, and when he was about to put the gel in his hair he stopped himself, knowing that you really prefer his hair curly and he would do just about anything to see the smile on your face like last time when you started playing with his curls.
The clock was agonisingly slow all fucking day and it was slowly driving him insane. He kept himself busy by bothering his friends, not talking about his upcoming date with anyone but George, who knew exactly why Matty was bothering him today.
Eventually the clock hit 2 and Matty got himself ready. He decided on a suit and he was going to go one better than last time and wear a bow tie instead of a plain old boring tie. But as he was attempting to do it without his stylist Patricia’s help he was failing miserably.
After a 5 minute FaceTime with her, and him attempting about 10 times and still failing, she ended up telling him to stop stressing out and just wear it untied as it still looked good. And after much internal debate when the call ended he decided that she was right, he left it hanging around his neck undone with his top button undone too.
When his taxi arrived, he double checked he had his wallet, phone, and cigarettes before he locked up. He doesn’t even care if he’s forgotten anything, he just can’t wait to see you again.
The drive feels like it takes forever, but he doesn’t care because with each passing second he’s getting closer to you. He’s really thankful he had his PA phone up the restaurant too not long after he made the reservation to ask if there was any chance the two of you could have a semi private table, and thankfully they agreed.
He doesn’t want any distractions from you today, and he’s aware you both can get recognized while out on this date so for both your peace of mind he was glad you could get a private space to enjoy each other’s company.
When he gets there, he just can't seem to stand still but he forces himself to lean against a column outside as he mindlessly scrolls through his phone to pass the time. It’s only a few minutes left until 4:30 so he knows you’ll be arriving soon and if he doesn’t distract himself then he’ll go mad over how slow time seems to be going.
Looking at the time on his phone again has him even more nervous, because it’s now eight minutes over your agreed time so his brain has him thinking of the scenario you promised him earlier wouldn’t happen.
And he knows he should trust your words but the excitement is slowly turning into anxiety and it’s not a pleasant feeling that’s gathering at the pit of his stomach.
Matty lights up a cigarette in hopes of helping him settle down a bit, and it works but not as much as a text of your coming through does.
He sighs in relief when he reads, I’m so sorry, I fully didn’t intend on being late but I’m stuck in traffic. I’m on my way xx
Taking a drag of his cigarette, he smiles to himself just from picturing you all stunning in the backseat of a taxi on your way to meeting him. Suddenly his anxiety turns into excitement again and he just wants everyone to move over so you can rush through the streets and make it to him faster.
Just imagining how you might be in the same position as him, he sends you a reassuring, It’s okay baby, I’ll be here waiting for you xx and when you get it, you feel your soul coming back to your body.
It’s not like he’d just up and leave for you being a few minutes late but there’s that constant thought in the back of your mind that loves to remind you how the whole situation is too good to be true and considering how things have gone for you in the past, your insecurities can get the best of you.
But just that one text has calmed you down and now you’re just squirming in your seat as your Uber slowly makes its way through the streets, stopping far more than you enjoy, and you’re painfully aware of every minute ticking by.
Every time the car has stopped in the past ten minutes, your heart has been going a bit faster and once the Uber driver hits the brakes again only one road away from the restaurant, you’re just completely done with it.
Your heart feels like it’s coming out of your chest when you open the door after you’ve told the driver that you’ll be getting out right there. You’d rather walk it than wait for everyone in front of you to move.
In a haste you make it out of the car right at the door of the Atlantic and you let out a shaky breath when you glance to your left and you can see the big letters of the Brixton House.
You swear you’ve not moved quicker in your life when you walk under the bridge and past a cafe, it’s just when you take a second to breathe right in front of the Brixton House that you see him waiting at the entrance of the restaurant, fiddling with his fingers and tapping his foot anxiously on the pavement.
You feel bad when you let out a giggle looking at him all nervous, you make sure your gaze stays on him as you walk a bit further just so you can stand directly in front of him across the street. And you just can’t help but admire all of him, curls perfectly untouched for you, dressed in a black suit and black dress shoes, an undone bowtie hanging around his neck, top button of his white shirt undone.
It’s a miracle you don’t melt right there and then when his eyes finally find yours and his whole face falls in such relief as he takes a deep breath and his hand comes over his chest. The biggest smile breaks on his face and you chuckle when you see him mouth a wow at you after giving you a full look.
Biting your bottom lip, you shrug as if it’s nothing to be amazed at and without wasting another second, you take advantage of the cars having stopped in traffic to cross the road and walk straight to him.
Automatically, your arms fly around his shoulders and his find their home around your waist, and the smell of his aftershave and cigarettes drowns you completely, making your head spin. It’s right then when it fully sinks in just how much you’ve missed him and your heart just grows in your chest when he clutches you a bit tighter to his chest.
“I’m sorry,” is the first thing you say, you hate knowing you’re about 15 minutes late and that he’s definitely been overwhelmed by that nagging feeling when somebody stands you up. “I truly didn’t mean to.”
Your voice sounds so incredibly worried so he gives you a little squeeze and jokes to help you relax, “It's actually terrible, and you were the one to call me out on our first date for being late. Don’t you only live ten minutes away from here?”
Chuckling into his neck, you poke his ribs to get back at him, making him jump in your arms at the sudden attack.
You take a deep breath, loosening your grip around him and he does the same so you both lean back to look at one another with your hands still on each other. “I know, I know,” You start, your hands going from his shoulders to cup his jaw and rub circles on his cheeks, “And I feel terrible.”
Matty feels like he’s putty in your hands, you make him feel so warm inside, he finds himself just wanting more of your touch. “I’m hurt.” He adds with a pout, playfully only because he wants his joke to keep going so he can give it to you like you gave it to him on your first date.
You pout back at him, continuing with your soft touches on his skin. “I’m so sorry, it’s been a nightmare.” You love the stubble he has going on right now, he just looks so good you can’t help letting your eyes wander all over his face now that you have him in front of you again.
“Do you have an excuse?” He jokingly challenges you to say something.
You look at him with pursed lips since your only excuse is exactly the one he gave you all those moons ago, “The traffic was terrible.”
“Always traffic.” He rolls his eyes and scoffs, his dramatic reaction makes you giggle and it takes only that sound to make him smile at you, “You can just admit you weren’t ready, you know?” He points out with raised eyebrows, still trying to appear serious but his elation to having you with him again has him completely failing as it just shines through his face.
You sigh, knowing that he’s joking about it all but you still feel the need to explain yourself. “Okay, god honest truth: I started getting ready at half twelve, was ready around two, but I just didn’t put my outfit on until three, so I didn’t ruin it by lounging about in it.”
You play back the day in your head and you’re almost wincing when you continue, “I was ready to leave at quarter past three but I didn’t want to be an hour early so I made myself wait, then no Uber would connect - should’ve thought about that in advance, taxis on New Years and all - then the driver couldn’t find my flat somehow and then there was just so much traffic, so here we are now.”
Sighing, you let your hands drop in front of you and start fiddling with your fingers before you add, “If I could go back, I would've set off an hour in advance, I’m sorry.”
“Okay, take a breath.” Matty’s hands are still on your waist so he pulls you in to leave a kiss on your temple, “It’s fine, baby. Let’s go inside, yeah?” He pulls back to look at you and seeing the way your face lights up has him grinning brightly.
He takes a hold of your hand and intertwines your fingers to make your way into the restaurant. It doesn’t take more than a minute for someone to check your reservation and then walk you over to where you’re gonna be seated.
What has you surprised is the fact that the hostess walks you through the restaurant and takes you away from the crowd of people in the main area, you’re actually guided through wooden doors that have a small privé written in gold in the middle of it and behind the doors, there’s only a few people in the few tables that are scattered around the room.
It’s much fewer people compared to the main area, and you notice the tables are much far apart with pieces of furniture and wine displays in between so the chatter is quiet in the background but you’re not awkwardly alone in the restaurant.
The hostess points you to your table and you almost coo at the sight of the little candles in the middle of it. She asks you which drinks you’re having and after Matty replies with some kind of wine, he drags the chair out for you to sit.
You take your blazer off your shoulders first and hang it on the back of the chair, “Private table and all?” Your eyebrows are raised and there’s a smirk on your face as you sit and you watch him take his own seat in front of you, “Blowing me away already, Mr. Healy.”
He chuckles at your words and smirks right back at you, “Just wait until I blow you away later.”
You press your lips together in surprise, trying not to smile at hearing his antics in person and not through the screen or reading them on texts, “Starting that early, are we?”
His hand goes over the table to reach yours, softly holding it and giving it a tiny squeeze to say, “We started that days ago, baby.” and finishing off with a cheeky wink that has you biting your tongue not to react.
You’re honestly not sure how you’ll survive this date knowing how he can get and just how much every single one of his comments affect you.
You play dumb, shrugging your shoulders as you say, “I wonder who started it.”
Your words die in your mouth when he looks firmly into your eyes and replies, “You did. In your room, the night before you left.”
A few seconds of silence pass as you look at him with your mouth slightly open and he’s loving it, you can see it in the way his smirk just doesn’t seem to want to leave his face so you narrow your eyes at him as if that will do anything.
It only makes him laugh and you are about to complain about him taking the piss out of you when he lifts your hand up to give it a small kiss and then softly brings it back down on the table and starts rubbing little circles on the back of your hand.
Your eyes fall to your hands and then back up at him, you find him already giving you the sweetest smile and it makes you want to hide behind your free hand.
And he only makes it worse when he is fully silent for a little bit and all that you can see in his face is adoration as he stares at you. His eyes go from your face to what you’re wearing and he does it once more before you call him out on it.
“It’s rude to stare.” You’re smirking at him, but inside you’re just screaming at the way he’s making you feel under his burning gaze.
Your whole body feels like it’s on fire when he replies, “Sorry, just can’t stop looking at you. You look stunning baby, so beautiful.”
Trying to change it back to him, you compliment him too, “You don’t look too bad yourself.”
But it’s a failed mission for him to stop looking at every inch of you because he’s giving you another look and taking a deep breath as if you’ve just stolen all of his oxygen by just being there.
He can’t even comment on the black ribbon you have tied in a bow around your neck like a choker. His thoughts went into the gutter straight away when he saw that additional piece. Not to mention the leather, again.
“I mean…” He tries to gather his thoughts but he just can’t really be coherent, “And the leather pants too? Are you trying to kill me?”
You get a little shy then, having to look away for a second and you let a few giggles escape your lips since you can still feel his eyes on you.
“Well maybe I did it on purpose.” You play, barely able to look back at him.
Matty can only smile seeing you get this flustered in front of him, and he can’t believe he’s got you finally in front of him. “I’ll die a happy death then.”
You close your eyes, unable to look at him and not squeal. It makes you shake your head, the chokehold he has you on, and when you do it, you can hear him chuckle.
“What?” He asks, amused at your actions.
“Nothing.” You reply, gathering yourself and slowly opening your eyes but they quickly move to the door the staff seemed to go through, “Where’s that wine when I need it?”
It seems like you’re saved by the bell when a waiter comes through the door with the bottle Matty asked for and a corkscrew in his free hand. Your glass is the first to be poured and you say a small thank you as you watch Matty’s glass fill too. The waiter asks you both if you’ve had a nice day and your heart feels like it's about to burst when Matty says, “It's a lot better now.” and he looks over at you.
At this point, you just know that your cheeks are going to be burning for this whole meal. There’s no doubt your feelings are written all over your face, so you just pray he takes some pity on you and you’re not sitting in your flustered embarrassment on this date.
Both you and Matty discuss the food for a little while, both saying how good everything sounds before you eventually settle on what you’re having. After you both order your food when the waiter comes back over, your eyes end up on your hands that are now interlocked across the table and Matty keeps subtly running his thumb over your skin.
It baffles you for a second how you didn’t even notice the both of you were sitting like that when the waiter was taking your orders. You’re not used to any public displays of affection really anymore, but the way this all feels so natural to you right now is really heart warming.
There's that little seed of self sabotage that has you wanting to pull your hand away from his once you realise, but you push that to the back of your mind and let yourself be happy.
Giving his hand a squeeze, you start saying, “Can you believe it’s finally New Years Eve? We’re finally here?”
“It’s about time.” There’s absolutely nothing that can wipe the smiles off your faces, and you’re quite sure no one would be able to properly say who has the biggest grin on their face.
“I feel like I’ve been waiting ages.” You admit truthfully, still pinching yourself over the fact that the day has finally come and you’re sat across from him.
Matty hums in agreement, continuing to make his touch known on the back of your hand. “Was it just me that thought this past week dragged on?”
“No, it really did.” You nod as you also have thought the same thing, like it was a poor joke made by high powers.
“I feel like Christmas was about a month ago.” Matty chuckles, and it makes you remember what you have in your bag for him.
“Oh,” You sit up a little straighter, and you very reluctantly let go of Matty’s hand so you can get your bag, “I have something for you.”
He’s a bit taken aback, scolding himself for not bringing anything to give you on the date, “Oh no, what is it?”
But he breathes a bit better when you say, “Your belated Christmas present.”
The way you’re looking at him with glimmery eyes full of anticipation has him cooing at you internally, but he’s quick to remind you of his words in the past days when you’d mentioned this very situation happening, “Baby, I told you not to get me anything.”
“Yeah okay, I get that,” You hold your hands up a little in surrender but carry on regardless, “But these really screamed you and when I saw them I couldn’t not get them for you. They’re just a bit of fun, okay? Don’t tell me off.”
You hand him the little box that’s wrapped in red and white striped paper and when he gets it, he holds it to his chest, “You really didn’t have to.”
Scrunching your nose at him because you just think he’s so cute, you assure him it’s really not a problem, “It's still not enough but I’ll make up for it with your birthday.”
“Planning on sticking with me for that long?” Matty makes it seem like he’s all jokes about it, like it’s just teasing but the prospect of you actually wanting to stay for long has his heart beating out of his chest.
You get a bit shy when you know what you suggested means, so hiding a bit into yourself you answer with a question, “If you want me to?”
He settles you rather fast when he winks at you as he says, “As long as you want to, baby.”
You shyly nod the tiniest bit before you look at the unopened present in his hands and tell him, “Come on, open it. I want to see your reactions.”
His fingers swiftly pick at the tape that’s holding the paper together and once he takes it all off, he’s met with a little box of lighters which he can see have little messages written on them and just giving them a quick glance, he’s already smiling to himself.
“Oh, these are fun.”
Matty can’t help but grin seeing what all of these lighters say. Theres five in this pack you’ve got him, and they say, Fuck your nudes send me fitpics, I wonder if life smokes after it fucks me, and, Ash is our purest form. He can’t help but think, Come on baby light my fire, is very fitting but Matty’s ultimate favourite says, If you wanna fuck smile when you give me the lighter back.
“Do you like them?” You can’t help but ask.
Matty nods, glancing at you before looking back to the lighters, “I really do.”
You then watch your date take them out of the box they came in, and he tests one quickly, something that's just as common as writing your name first when you get a new pen, and he smiles when they work. And you’re glad they do.
But then Matty passes you one with his grin getting bigger and you don’t even have to look at it to know that its the one about smiling if you want to fuck. And whilst you do, you’d like to have this date first.
“No,” You shake your head, trying your best not to laugh at him, “Not right now.”
Matty can’t help but laugh at you trying to keep the grin off your face as you hand it back to him. He pretends he’s innocent when he asks, “Why?”
He doesn’t want to take it back from you, but you’re insistent when you offer it back to him, “It doesn’t count if you do it right now.”
Matty frowns a little at that, not taking it back from you just yet. Instead, he cackles, “Since when does this have rules?”
“Since I just established them.” You raise your eyebrows at him and hold it out to him.
Matty’s frown persists, “That’s unfair.”
“You’re not allowed until later.” You shake your head, trying not to laugh at this but you’re almost failing miserably.
“How much later are we talking?” Matty asks curiously with a cheeky smile on his lips as he takes the lighter off you.
“You’re insufferable.” You laugh a little as you shake your head.
Instead of letting that be it though, Matty grabs your hand and intertwines your fingers across the table again and as he does, he raises his eyebrows and grins, “Oh am I? Tell me more.”
“How does everything manage to fuel your ego?” You sigh, not stopping the smile from taking over your face.
You absolutely adore the way he instantly starts caressing your hand.
“You should know this by now baby.” Matty smiles, and hearing the nickname he has for you again makes your heart leap.
“Right.” You nod, knowing you should. But you try to warn him off making this date too overwhelming for you, “Remember, I know many other things… So stop teasing.”
Matty knows that you’re alluding to your pictures that he likes, but he can’t help trying to make you go all embarrassed. He lets his eyes glance down to what you’re wearing again before they run back up to your gorgeous eyes, and he cheekily grins, “Don’t need your Instagram when you look like this in front of me.”
You use your free hand to rub your eyes, taking a second for a deep breath before you look back up at him. His grin is huge but you're trying to be serious when you tell him off, “Stop because I’ll combust before the starters even come out.”
“That quick?” Matty chuckles.
You bite your tongue before raising your eyebrows to warn him, “I’ll make sure to remember that later.” and both of you start laughing.
When the starters arrive, you and Matty chat about your Christmases and your families. Discussing where the both of you fit into your family dynamics is quite funny, and the way Matty describes what his family is like and how he talks about them makes your heart warm.
Matty loves hearing your stories though. Your various anecdotes about this Christmas and ones earlier in your life have him giggling and it makes him long to make memories with you.
He also loves the way you talk about Amelia. It really seems like you value her just as much as he does the boys, and the love you both have for your friends is nothing but a green flag.
After your plates are taken away, you end up talking a bit about his US tour as he had a few more funny anecdotes he hadn’t told you yet. You have your questions for him, and Matty answers them all honestly with a smile on his face, he can’t help but find it cute how curious you are, not just for the stories but how you also check if he enjoyed what he was up to.
“You know what I think is a crime?” You ask just after a question about his tour, so Matty can’t help chuckle at the complete switch in direction of the conversation.
He asks, “What?”
“That you don’t sing This Must Be My Dream live.” You call him out on it because it’s something you think needs to be addressed, for your sake and everyone else who wants to hear it.
Matty bursts out laughing at that, making you start giggling as well as his laugh is just one of pure and utter joy. You could honestly listen to it forever.
When he calms down, he asks, “Is that your favourite?”
“Maybe on that album, but don't distract me,” You smile but shake your head, not letting him change the subject, “I want you to play it on the UK tour. Preferably a day I'm in the crowd.”
Matty chuckles at that, expecting nothing less. And despite the fact it’s not going to happen, he double checks, “London, Manchester, and Newcastle, right?”
This makes you grin, finally having the upperhand with something to tease him with for a second, “And you say I'm obsessed with you? You’ve remembered all the dates I’m coming to.”
And you take a successful sip of your wine as a mini celebration for getting that in there. Matty loves the smug look you give him, but he can’t help but ruin it and bring it back around on you.
“You say that like you haven't paid to see me perform.” Matty chuckles, taking a sip of his own wine before continuing, “Which you don’t need to do… You can sell the tickets or gift them to someone if you want. I’ll put you on the guestlist.”
“Damn,” You can’t help but grin hearing that, “This must be going well if I'm already guestlist approved.”
And you really think it is going well. There’s never been a moment of silence between you other than when you’re taking a second to compose yourself after he’s just been overly flirty with you. And even then it's both of you trying not to laugh at your reactions. You love how this date is going, and you’re pleased Matty thinks so too.
“Of course.” Matty nods, reaching over the table for your hand again which you happily give him.
It really reminds you of that bit on your first date where he said ‘we’re all a bit needy’ and you really relate to that especially today. You’re glad he wants to touch you, it feels so much nicer than any other date that you’ve been on in the past.
You feel genuinely wanted by him. And that in itself makes your heart beat so much faster for him.
Matty decides to allude to something interesting that he knows you don’t know about yet. “And those shows are going to be interesting ones anyway.”
Your eyes somehow get brighter when they go wide. You have to ask, “In what way?”
“I can’t spoil the surprise,” Matty shakes his head, his curls almost going in his eyes as he does, but he’s not giving you anything. “It’ll give you something to look forward to.”
You smile, “More like it gives me incentive to come home from LA.”
“Yeah.” Matty nods.
That certainly played a little part in why he didn't want to tell you anything. Because he genuinely wants you around him for as long as possible and using your love for the band could ensure that. But mostly because he really wanted it to be a nice surprise for you.
Even though he would have you backstage beforehand, so you’d probably end up guessing the surprise. But still, the thought of you even being there backstage fills Matty with so much joy he can imagine himself trying to keep you around for as long as possible.
“I can’t believe you’re not going to tell me more.” You press your lips together and look down pretending to be hurt by it.
Matty chuckles at that, and he gives your hand a squeeze before admitting, “I like to keep you guessing.”
“Yeah,” You nod, giggling a little knowing that he really does. “So is Belfast going to be special because I’m bringing Amelia along for that one for her birthday, don’t forget.”
Your date chuckles but nods, “I’m sure we can make it special in a different way to the rest.”
Cheekily, you hope, “By playing This Must Be My Dream?”
“No.” Matty shakes his head.
You push on, “Antichrist then?”
“Woman, I will-” Matty starts warning you but you interrupt him.
“You can play Woman, that's a great song.” You fire straight back, keeping your face neutral as you add, “Entirely fine by me.”
“You know,” Matty grins, “That's the first time since our chicken shop date that you’ve gone back into your character.”
And when he points it out, you realise that you have. You drop the harder expression and let yourself smile.
“Sorry,” You shake your head a little, looking down embarrassed as you didn’t even notice,  “Sometimes I just slip into i-”
“Don’t apologise, it's what drew me to you in the first place.” Matty gives your hand a small squeeze, and when you look back up at him you see his big grin as he continues, “It just so happens I really like the way you can’t maintain that around me. I like seeing you flustered too much.”
“You can’t let me just have this date where it's just cute?” You narrow your eyes like you’re scolding him for it but your features soften when he gives you a little giggle in response.
Shaking his head and smirking at you, he replies, “No, I really love making you a hot mess.” And you’re about to scoff when he adds, “Emphasis on hot.” giving you another evident glace up and down.
He can tell that the sarcastic, “Right, thanks.” you let out is only a facade for your cheeks heat up and you purse your lips to try and not give him a reaction.
But he wants to break you, to see you flustered once more because he actually loves seeing the effect of his words shining through you and he’s sure he’d never get tired of it. “Though I would love to make an actual mess of you.”
Matty makes a subtle show of licking his lips and biting his bottom lip with his eyes stuck on yours. It all just makes you hold your breath and when you realise you’re doing that, he sees the way you let out a shaky breath only to take a deep one right away.
“You need to be stopped, we are in public. Quit the teasing.” You manage to say through your teeth, rolling your eyes but still giving him a little smirk.  
Your thoughts were already going crazy and he doesn’t help at all, not when he looks like that, when he smirks at you like that and especially not when he says, “You don’t know the half of it baby. I’ll have you begging soon and that’ll only be the start.”
That comment only adds to all that’s running through your head and seeing the scenario playing inside your mind has your mouth opening agape as you let out a scoff. He’s the biggest menace but you secretly love the way your insides knot and feel like they’re burning up at his words and under his gaze.
The mains arrive a few minutes after and you thankfully manage to pick your jaw up off the ground. Both of you have a normal, none teasing, conversation whilst you're eating, between moaning at how good the food is.
Enjoying yourselves so much, you even do the cheesy ‘wanna taste of mine’ and after some raised suggestive eyebrows, you do end up sharing a fork full of your different mains.
There’s a nice ambiance to the restaurant and it’s all very pretty. There are a few other slightly bigger tables across the other side of the room that gives the place a nice atmosphere, but you’re thankful you still have your privacy as there are serving stations in between you.
You talk all about what’s coming for you both next year, the continuation of the ‘At Their Very Best’ tour has both of you excited and you share the same excitement when you tell him all about the content you’re getting at the very start of the year.
You’re booked and busy. Golden Globes, the Brit Awards, your and Amelia’s Valentines Day party, recording multiple ads with different brands and various events during London Fashion Week.
It’s all very surreal to you so you ramble a little about the ideas you have to record in those events and when you mention your TikTok soon being filled to the brim with funny bits, he very quickly remembers his favourite videos you’ve posted both there and on your Instagram.
“Your latest reel made me laugh.” Matty grins, remembering it fondly.
He found your videos on Instagram and TikTok quite amusing and he found them not long after the NME Awards where you first met.
Despite being best friends, you and Amelia were quite different, especially when it came to your personal social media output. Amelia tends to keep up with the new music trends and the viral dances that come with it, and you take a very different approach to your best friend.
You’ve become known for taking the piss out of Amelia learning and practising those dances and then the camera flicks to you and of you trying and failing not to laugh. It started off with you having enough of whatever the new song was as you were forced to listen to it on repeat as she tried to learn the dances.
It left you bored or completely over it and when the camera flicked back to you from your best friend, people found it hilarious. Matty found it hilarious. And your last video could quite possibly be his favourite.
“Oh,” You chuckle at the memory, “The one where she stopped and told me off?”
Matty nods, already giggling as he remembers it, “When she threw that pillow at you, I laughed so loud.”
Your eyes go wide and you pretend you’re hurt, “Wow.”
“It was how shocked you were about it.” Matty giggles, replaying it in his mind as he grins at you, “And then you threw it back when she was dancing again and she fucking went for you and the video cut out. It was brilliant, something I would do to Hann.”
“I’m glad you find them amusing.” You smile, “Most of the time it’s the only way I can get through the time where we’re stuck together and she starts making the videos. It's the song playing over on repeat when I forget to bring my AirPods with me that kills me off. Rookie mistake on my part.”
Matty chuckles, “You never want to get up and do it with her?”
Instantly, you shake your head, “Not to shit songs like the ones that go viral.”
He frowns at you, knowing one of his songs has been quite popular in that app, “You calling About You shit?”
It’s a wonder why he even asked that when he has seen just how much you love that song.
“Clearly not, but you didn’t make a shitty dance to that song, did you?” You raise your eyebrows to make him understand your point.
He shrugs softly, understanding what you mean, “No, just to Oh Caroline.”
You scoff out a laugh, not believing he’s just said that. “That dance is far from shit.”
“You’d dance to that one then?” His eyebrow raises as if he’s challenging you to say yes.
“Yeah and I have.” You easily admit, you loved that dance so much so it hadn’t been a burden learning it.
“What?” He asks all smiles, trying to picture you dancing to it.
And you smile back at him as you explain, “Amelia asked me to learn it with her. And because I like the song, I reluctantly agreed.”
Matty loves this new piece of information so he fully states, “Now you’ve got to do the dance with me.”
But you quickly turn him down because you know you’d get so nervous dancing it with him that you’d end up messing up, and he also was a good dancer so you knew you weren’t going to live up to his expectations. “I’ll save myself the embarrassment and stick to dancing with Amelia.”
He pouts exaggeratedly, doing his best puppy eyes at you, “Who am I gonna dance with then?”
You only give him a fake pout back, sarcasm in every word you say next, “I’m sure you’ll manage to find someone, you always do.”
In a fraction of a second, his expression switches to a shit-eating grin and he takes your comment as an opportunity to tease you, “Is that a little green I see in your eyes?” His eyes narrow like that’s gonna make you admit you’re jealous.
“No.” You reply meekly, cutting his advances to get another reaction from you.
He’s not quite done yet though, so he brings back a moment to refresh your memory, “Remember when you kissed Amelia and put it on Instagram because you were jealous?”
“Oh yeah,” You nod, and after you’ve taken a sip of your wine, you fire right back at him, “Remember when you did the same when you kissed Ross the night after?”
Matty just smirks, “Bet you were jealous of that too.”
“Jealous of you, yeah.” You nod, knowing just how much it subtly enrages him.
Matty scoffs, “We’re on a date.”
You raise your eyebrows, challenging him, “And you’re bringing up me being jealous.”
“I like to tease you.” He reminds you with a cheeky smile, really trying to act like he’s all innocent and doesn’t have any other intentions.
“Yeah I know you do.” You giggle a bit and shake your head, fighting a smile breaking out on your face. “Trying to make me go crazy before the day is done.”
He loves how you’re trying to scold him for it but you’re failing miserably at keeping a stoic expression, so he points out the truth that’s written all over your face, “You love it really.”
“Mhhh.” You hum, not giving him an answer. “I think you love doing it just as much.”
“Oh definitely,” He assures with an enthusiastic nod of his head, “I’m dying to get my hands on you.”
You let out a chuckle at his bluntness, “I bet you are.” You say it in a way that seems uninterested but he knows you’re forcing it so he can’t fully see it on your face that you want it too.
“You act like you’re not thinking the exact same.” Matty calls you out straight away, “Or do I need to remind you of your texts?”
You bite your tongue and stay silent for a long couple of seconds before you can finally admit why you’re holding back. “Maybe I’d agree if we weren’t in public and you’re not trying to tease.”
He makes sure to joke about so that you get a bit more comfortable but completely understanding where you’re coming from. “You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to the date.”
“Maybe I just can’t refuse a date when one is offered?” You offer as a reason even though you’ve never been more thankful to be sitting across from someone.
Rolling his eyes playfully, he asks with sudden curiosity sparking, “Has there been any other dates with anyone you’ve been on your chicken shop dates with that you wanted a second date with?”
“Oh yeah, loads of people.” You nod enthusiastically, “Me and Amelia talk about them all the time.”
Only letting out a small, “Oh.” he keeps quiet to encourage you to continue and he’s actually intrigued now because of how fast your answer was.
Making a rundown through the memories of your chats with Amelia about this exact topic, you take a small breath before starting your list. “So I want a second date with Yungblud.”
Matty pulls a face at that name, and “Why?” immediately falls from his lips.
But you ignore him and just continue name dropping, “And I want my one with Charli… And I guess KSI, Jade from Little Mix, Bimini was a fave, Finneas too.” And the more names you list, the further Matty’s face falls. “I’m doing one with Kehlani too and I’m excited for that, and I would so go out with Phoebe again. I thought me and her made a great couple.”
“Okay,” Matty raises his finger to stop you for a moment and he says, “I thought you were just going to say one, not list your phone book.”
“Aw, are we getting a little jealous?” You pout, teasing him.
He doesn’t let a single second go by when he replies with a stern “No.”
“Oh,” You grin, knowing you have the upper hand now, “I think you are.”
When you don’t get one word from him, only that blank stare of his, you take it a bit further, “You wanna be my one and only Matty?”
It certainly reaches his ears in such a teasing tone but he genuinely answers it with, “Yeah, I do.”
That makes you melt inside, seeing the soft smile that tugs at the corner of his lips when you just keep looking at him has you needing to reassure him of it all now and remind him just how special this whole situation with him really is.
“Well I haven’t been on a second date with anyone else.” You start, your eyes solely focused on him and a growing grin on your face, “Only ever had one in my flat.” Your hand reaches out to grab his and when you do, you squeeze it as you say, “Only one has slept in my bed.”
A few beats of silence pass, both of you are stuck staring at each other and the touch of your skin setting both of you up alive. Matty licks his lips and replies, “Lucky them.”
If he wasn’t so focused on every one of your movements, he could’ve missed the little shake of your head you give him before correcting him, “Lucky you.”
You fill up with pride when you see his cheeks get a little pink and he breaks eye contact, getting too flustered under your gaze, so you take the opportunity to tease him. “Jealousy looks good on you.”
And this becomes yet again one of those instances you are reminded to not mess with him because he knows just what to say back so your teasing ends up biting you back, “You know what else would look good on me?”
“What?” You naively inquire back.
“You.” He simply responds, “Preferably with nothing on, riding me how you were going to the other night.”
He can feel the way you freeze across from him, even your breath getting caught in your throat and it’s like you have forgotten how to function after that. So to make it even worse for you, and for him to get an even better reaction, he continues to run his dirty mouth.
“Or would you prefer me on top of you?” Matty leans closer so he can drop his voice and ask you in a low voice, “Your legs wrapped tight around my waist, I can kiss and tease that pretty neck of yours until you're begging for me to put my hands to better use than holding yours above your head.”
Matty’s lip twitches up into the beginning of a smirk when he sees the way that has affected you. He can’t help but ask, “You like that baby?”
You nod aimlessly, you’re looking straight at him but you’re not really processing him. Instead you’re picturing that exact scenario he’s describing in your head and how desperate you actually are for it.
And you’re lost for what feels like a long few minutes when in reality it’s ten seconds of barely breathing as you repeat his words in your head and love the feeling of him still gently caressing your skin from across the table as if he’s not just talked about fucking you into a mattress.
But it’s like you’re jolted out of that fantasy when the waiter comes back over and politely asks, “Would you like to order any desserts?”
Matty glances at you, prompting you to speak first as if he hasn't just given you a mini stroke.
“I-” You stutter as you look from Matty down to your menu, but nothing sounds as good as what you were just offered. So you pick up the piece of paper and hand it back to the waiter with a small smile, “I’m good, thank you.”
“You sure?” Matty double checks, not wanting this date to be over just yet.
“Yeah.” You nod, and Matty realises exactly why you’ve declined when you add, “Might have something at home later.”
So without question, Matty agrees and does the same thing.
“I'm also alright, thank you.” He hands the menu back and with the mutual understanding that has just passed between you in just that glance, Matty asks, “Can we have the bill please?”
“Course.” The waiter nods and wonders back off over to the bar.
Matty is pulling his wallet out of his inside blazer pocket when he catches you lifting your bag up and he knows what you’re about to do so he instantly stops you, “Put your bag down.”
“But I-”
“No,” Matty interrupts, being serious when he says, “I asked you out, I’m paying.”
“Okay then,” You agree, because if you don’t you’ll argue over it for hours. Instead, you tell him, “But I’m paying next time.”
Matty’s grin is instant. He raises his eyebrows at you, smirking slightly, “Next time?”
You hum a little, and you play on it a little, “Depending on how your performance tonight goes, I reckon I’d go out with you again.”
As if you wouldn’t feel like the luckiest woman alive to go on another date with him.
“Okay,” Matty stands up, “He’s not fast enough, I’m going to go pay.”
You can’t help the laugh that falls from your lips, along with, “Eager much?”
Matty leans down and whispers, “For you, very.” before he very quickly presses a kiss to your neck and he walks off over to the bar to pay.
You take a minute to control the way your cheeks start burning, and you look down to compose yourself as you take a deep breath.
Your mind is echoing with a chorus of what the fuck? and the pure disbelief seems to be stuck with you and not wanting to leave. It’s a weird feeling that overcomes you as you are impatient and time seems to be going far too slow now but, at the same time, you’re feeling like there’s not enough time for you to get your wits about.
When Matty comes back over, you’ve just put your blazer back on and he takes your hand and helps you stand. He then grabs his blazer and puts it on, making sure your presents are still in his pocket before he intertwines your fingers and you both make your way out.
As you leave, you both thank the waiter for serving you and they wish you both a happy new year and you say the same back. When you get outside, it's no surprise to you that Matty pulls out his pack of cigarettes, it's certainly been a few hours since he last had one.
It had started raining since you were last outside and it's still coming down now, but neither of you mind too much. Matty pulls you out into the rain again, which has you giggling because it's all too like the end of your first date.
“Remember when you told me to live a little and stand in the rain with you?” You giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck as the rain falls on you both.
“I remember getting you all wet, yeah.” Matty grins, his hands on your hips pulling you flush against him now you’re in your own company again. But of course, he has to keep you on your toes, he leans in and quietly says, “Believe I can do it again, bit better this time.”
You bite your lip and you scrunch your face up and look down so he can’t fully see how much he affects you. Inside you're silently screaming and you playfully push against his chest, but Matty keeps you close.
He giggles, not letting you go at all, and he teases, “I fucking love teasing you.”
“Yeah I know.” You shake your head, trying your best to keep some composure when you look back up at him.
Matty can’t help but laugh at your reaction, but then he notices the rain again and he starts moving the both of you back towards the side of the restaurant as the taxi he ordered clearly isn’t here yet, “Come on, let's get you out of the rain.”
“I-” You’re about to tell him that you don’t mind, that it’s just a bit of rain. But then Matty moves you against the wall of the restaurant and he stands flush against you, practically pushing you against the wall as he’s trying to shield you from the rain. A surprised, “Oh?” leaves your lips as you smirk at the entire situation.
Matty tries not to show how much he likes you reacting to him, this time he instead takes his cigarettes out of his blazer pocket and lights up his own before he offers you one, “Do you want a cig?”
You nod, “Please.” and he offers you the pack and lighter.
After you’ve lit it, the first drag somehow calms you down a little, and you both find yourselves subtly glancing at the other like you’re not practically pressed against each other and you’ve not just been on a date.
A minute passes that's filled with noises of traffic, the relief that smoking gives you, and longing looks at each other. But when the rain starts falling a little heavier and the wind picks up, it hits the side of your faces making you scrunch your features and laugh.
Both of you wipe the water away, and Matty takes a drag of his now nearly finished cigarettes saying, "You know what we really need right now?"
"Funnily enough, I do." You nod, remembering what you brought with you and Matty watches as you reach into your bag and pull out his umbrella that he gave you after your first date.
As Matty smiles at you, you hand it back as you remind him, "Promised you'd have it back for New Years." and he laughs and takes it from you.
“Why didn't you give it me a few minutes ago?” Matty asks, putting it up immediately and standing closer to you so he can cocoon you both against the wall and away from the rain. He tuts, “You let me get all wet."
"And give up you pressing me into a wall? I don’t think so." You grin as you raise your eyebrows at him, and his smirk has you wanting to melt right then and there.
Whilst the confidence is bubbling inside you, before you back out of it, you say what you’ve been thinking for your whole date. “You look good by the way.” You say as you take the last drag of your cigarette before you throw the stub to the ground.
“Thank you,” Matty smiles, standing a bit taller at the fact you approve of his attire. “I did dress for the occasion this time.”
“Mmmh,” You hum, trying not to smile as you pretend to scold him, “Couldn’t finish it off and do the tie for me though?”
Matty smiles at you taking a hold of either end of his undone bowtie then, but instead of teasing you, he admits as he takes another drag, “Not through the lack of trying.”
“Awh,” You coo, grinning at him in a way that makes his chest ache, “Did you make an effort for me?”
Matty nods, “I tried my best.”
You hum, your eyes going from his back down to his white shirt with the top button undone and the loose tie that you have a hold of. You want nothing more than to tug on it and pull him into a kiss, but you refrain for a moment more before you look back up at him just after you whisper loud enough for him to hear, “One less thing to take off you I guess.”
At that you feel his free hand grip on your waist that little bit tighter and when he sees you run your tongue over your lips, wetting them that little bit more that somehow makes them even more enticing, he’s seconds away from smashing his lips against yours. The only thing that stops him is the little, “Oh.” of realisation that you let out.
His eyes find yours again as you offer him back his lighter with a knowing smile and a, “Here you go.” And it’s when he takes it from you, you see the wave of realisation take over his face and he grins at you seeing that he had accidentally handed you the lighter that had ‘if you want to fuck smile when you hand me the lighter back’ on it. And you’re smile is fucking huge.
Pocketing the lighter, Matty looks back into your eyes and raises his eyebrows at you, like he’s checking your earlier rules. You just give him a cheeky smirk and eyebrow raise which screams that you’re very much on board with the idea.
“Please let me take you home.” Matty pleads as he presses you into the wall a little more, his hand finding your hip again wanting to hold you.
Trying your best to refrain from kissing him just a second longer, but you’re only human. All you can do is nod before you pull on both ends of his undone tie and his lips crash against yours.
You’ve waited so long to feel this again and the way your heart rapidly beats in your chest as he freely moans against your lips has your head spinning. He tastes like the red wine you’ve both just been drinking, and it makes you pull that bit more on his tie so he can’t escape you.
You feel Matty’s free hand move from your hip to cup your jaw, tilting it up and he holds you there firmly, not wanting this kiss to end. It’s been a long fucking week and he’s been dreaming of kissing you again, among other things.
Wishing time would stop for you is clearly not enough because after a long minute of giving into what you’ve both craved for so long, you’re interrupted. Both of you pull away when you hear Matty’s phone ringing, and there’s a buzz to you both. The air between you is charged and you don’t for a second think that is going to change until you get somewhere private.
“Taxi’s here,” Matty announces, and immediately he takes your hand and says, “Come on.”
You silently giggle and follow him to the car, and he protects you with the umbrella as you move instead of himself. You can’t stop smiling at the way he opens the door for you and you get in with a small embarrassed smile and a little shake of your head. But you shouldn't be surprised when he slides in next to you, making you sit in the middle.
As you’re putting your seatbelts on, the taxi driver greets you, asking how you are and once you both tell him that you’re good, he double checks the address you’re going to, but what surprises you is that he reads out your address that Matty must have already put into the app. You’re about to correct him, but the curly haired man beside you confirms and says, “Yeah, that's great mate. Thanks.”
And with that the driver is off, but you’re left to glance at Matty curiously, and when he meets your gaze, you ask him, “I thought we were going back to yours before George’s?”
“It's too far away.” Matty shakes his head before leaning closer to say a little quieter, “Think we’ve both waited long enough, don’t you?”
The look in both of your eyes screams sin. And something in you bubbles with nerves but overall excitement.
You nod, a little short of breath but you don’t think Matty notices that, but he does steal a quick but longing kiss before you part and try to calm yourselves down. And as your date starts politely conversing with the taxi driver, asking how long he’s on for tonight and if he minds how busy it's going to be, you have a quiet moment to yourself where you let your reality sink in.
You’re about to have sex with Matty Healy.
You should know that the curly haired man can’t stop his teasing for the journey back to yours. No, you’re sure he insists on being a tease to slowly drive you insane as to what's about to happen.
At first you think it’s nothing but him being touchy with you, him once again showing his affection towards you through simple touches to the top of your thigh. You half think its because he likes the tight leather pants you have on too, but it soon becomes clear what his intentions actually are when his fingers slip to the inside of your thigh.
Immediately, you hold your breath and you can’t not watch what he’s doing, as it somehow makes his touch even more agonising. The leather does nothing to minimise his touch, and when his fingers run along the seam of the pants you feel yourself go a bit dizzy.
If his touch feels this good now, you can’t imagine how intense it’s going to be when there is no restricting material between you. And you can’t fucking wait for it, but here in this taxi his touch feels a little dangerous, something the both of you know you shouldn’t be doing, but that somehow makes it even more exhilarating.
Matty can see the way you’re watching him, and he can’t help but smile as you’re doing absolutely nothing to stop him. He fucking loves the way he can see your breathing gets a little more laboured and he can practically hear the thoughts running around your mind because they are the exact same as his own.
When you’re a few minutes away, you can’t handle Matty’s teasing anymore, so instead you trap his hand on your thigh by crossing your legs, making it so he can’t move it anymore but he’s still holding you. The way you can feel his smirk when you do that, and you can feel it as if his stare alone is making your cheeks burn.
“Tease.” You mutter under your breath.
And you can hear his smile as he leans closer and whispers, “You’ve seen nothing yet baby.”
“Neither have you.” You try to maintain your strength.
“We’ll see.” Matty backchats.
You quietly hum in response to that but let your fingertips do the same that he was doing to the top of your thigh. You trace patterns near his knee, and from your peripherals you can see your date is about to say something, but because he’d already been so chatty, the driver asks him another question about your plans for the evening. As Matty is telling him about the party you’re going to later, you continue to tease, not letting him win like he was trying to.
As he gets a little more into the conversation, you move your fingers from running up and down the top of his thigh to the inside of it and you let them reach higher up his leg. You just about see his head whip around to look at you, but you ignore him and continue.
You move back down his thigh as the driver is talking, but as soon as Matty is chatting again, your back up near his crotch and you feel the hand on your thigh tighten, like he needs to hold something so he doesn’t completely fall apart at your teasing. But that’s how you know you’ve got him right in the palm of your hand, and whilst you still have some power left, you use it to your advantage.
Doing the same thing again, waiting this time until he’s just about done talking, you move your hand right up the inside of his thigh until you grab his crotch and keep pressure on it. You can feel how hard he’s getting beneath your palm and the sharp intake of breath as he stutters to the end of his sentence has you having to press your lips together and dip your head to maintain your innocence.
The driver must start talking again but neither of you pay attention to it as Matty’s lips are against your ear in a second and he whispers, “You’re playing a dangerous game baby.”
“Think you’re enjoying it.” You whisper back and you gently but firmly squeeze just to tease him that extra bit as the car pulls over and you’re finally back at your flat.
Rushed pleasantries are exchanged with the driver, all wishing each other a happy new year before you and Matty scramble out of the car. Matty even being a gentleman and grabbing your hand to help you out before thanking the driver again and shutting the door.
Walking up to your building, you stand at the door and try to unlock it as fast as you can, but you’re letting your pent up emotions get the better of you. And it gets worse when Matty comes to stand behind you, it just makes your flustered mind even worse.
You feel Matty’s hands on your hips, but the way he then presses himself against your arse and you can feel just how hard he is now he’s standing up has your mind sinking further and further into the gutter. “You’re such a fucking tease baby.” Matty says in a low voice, as he waits for you to open the door, and he leaves a teasing kiss on the back of your neck after he brushes your hair away.
“Get used to it.” You tell him, trying not to care if you think he can see your shaky hands, you unlock the door a few seconds later and the both of you head inside. Matty playfully slaps your arse as you both head up the stairs which has you both laughing as you practically race to your floor.
You’ve never been so thankful not to live too many floors up because you can feel the energy between you now and it’s electric. You need to be inside your flat, you need his hands on you, his lips on yours. You just need him.
Once inside your flat, both of you are on each other immediately. As soon as the door is shut and locked, Matty’s lips find your own and you’ve been pushed up against your door.
Groaning into the kiss, Matty can’t keep his hands to himself. One of his hands is quick to get a hold of your waist to keep you flush against him as if there was a way for you not to be, you’re trapped between your door and him so the feeling of his fingers clutching at you makes you even needier.
His other hand cups your jaw firmly, his thumb pressed on your cheek and it seems to stay there for a while, that is until he pushes his hips into yours and you can’t help the whimper falling from your lips. That ends up with his hand slowly going down and wrapping his fingers around your neck, applying a delicious pressure that has your head spinning.
The only thing going through your head now is how badly you need him closer, and if you weren’t so overcome with lust, you’d laugh at yourself since there’s really not more space between you but it certainly feels like he isn’t close enough.
Instead of tugging him closer by his tie, you decide to move things along and push his blazer back off his shoulders. Seeing where this is going, Matty lets the material fall from him and he pulls you towards him as he moves you both further into your flat.
Your hands are cupping his face, keeping him in the kiss, making it difficult when Matty starts to push your blazer off of you too. Letting one arm loose at a time, still clutching him with your other, you let him take the blazer off you as you both blindly stumble towards your bedroom.
Just after it hits the floor, you hear Matty kick your bedroom door open and you both can’t help but giggle at the loud thud and the door almost bouncing back and hitting you. Not letting that distract you though, you kiss him again this time walking him further back into your room towards your bed.
As soon as Matty feels the mattress behind his knees, he sits down on it, keeping you in the hot and needy kiss as you come to straddle him. Both you and Matty moan when he pulls your hips down onto his, and you’re overcome with sinful thoughts when you feel how hard he is.
Thankfully, this is the time and the place to let all of these fantasies become reality. Like you did last week, you push on Matty’s chest and he falls onto his back with a groan and you give yourself a second to smirk down at him.
Just to tease, as you lean down over him, you roll your hips on top of his causing a delightful friction between you that has you holding in a moan and Matty freely gasping before he clutches your hips so he can encourage you more.
One of your hands runs slowly down his chest and your fingers deftly undo the few buttons that were keeping his shirt closed. You leave a trail of fire on his skin as your fingertips ghost over every inch of his chest, and when you reach his We Are Kings tattoo, you make sure to give it a bit more attention.
Matty grows breathless, unable to continue kissing you and it just has you smirking, lips still hovering over his.
A shaky breath he takes encourages you to teasingly trace the band of his boxers that are peeking through the top of his pants. The way he throws his head back slightly and closes his eyes harder is then permanently engraved in your mind.
His mouth is further up now that he’s moved, so you leave a peck on his chin and start making your way down his neck, leaving open mouthed kisses in your wake. That is until you reach a spot at the bottom of his neck that has him shuddering when your lips find it, and after that reaction you can’t hold yourself back from encouraging more out of him.
Pride fills you completely when you get a string of soft moans as you lick and suck on the particular place on his neck and you’re certain you won’t let up on it until his fingers tangle in your hair and he lets out a choked, “Fuck baby, c’mere.”
The husky tone of his voice has you aching between your legs and you just can’t not obey when he sounds like that.
You see his blown out pupils for a fraction of a second when he’s pulled you back up to face him but then he’s crashing his lips against yours and it’s a hungry kiss, so desperate you know your lips will be swollen but somehow that notion only gets you going even more.
The whimper you let out as you kiss him has Matty knowing you’re enjoying yourself, but he wants more. Before he can even think about it though, you distract him again. Your hand finds home around his throat, tightening to keep him in the kiss you’re sharing and it makes Matty’s body feel like he’s being set alight.
You feel the vibration of the moan he lets out under your hand and it makes you smile in the kiss, breaking it from the immense satisfaction from both what you’re doing and his reactions.
But he’s desperate to keep his lips on yours so he doesn’t waste a second to kiss down your jaw, kissing every bit of your neck he can reach.
Your breathing becomes more agitated when he gives your neck attention, that combined with the incessant rocking of your hips has your senses going out of control.
Matty brings one of his hands up and, with every passing second, it gets closer to your chest. The moment he starts groping one of your breasts and pinches your nipple over your bralette, you let out a stuttering moan.
The sound only encourages him to continue and you’re enjoying it far too much, so much so that you have to think of a way to make him stop because you know that if he keeps it up then this isn’t going to last long. And you want to elongate this as much as you can – fuck wherever you need to be afterwards, you don’t care about being late right now.
So your hands clasp around his wrists and lift them up and over his head, fingers keeping his hands on the bed and away from being able to touch you.
His eyes narrow, like he’s challenging you to actually go through with your actions and since you have no plan on giving up on them, you smirk down at him feeling every bit of power having him under you at what seems completely your mercy.
The motion of your hips becomes more intently then, keeping the pace you had but being more mindful of every sway. Matty has a half mind to give you a bit of time to soak up the feeling of power but he grows impatient and even if he likes seeing you on top of him, taking it all into your hands, he’s been quite literally dreaming of having you unravel beneath him for so long and there’s no more time he can wait for it to happen.
In a swift movement, he manages to break free from your hold and wraps his arm around your waist to flip you both over. It’s like you’ve just blinked and you’re now under him. You would complain any other time but this is now happening and you’re not doing a thing to stop it.
“Okay, you’ve had your fun baby,” Matty grins, looking down at your shocked expression, “My turn.”
Your stomach fills with anticipation hearing that, and it’s like Matty knows because half a second later you’re trapped in a searing kiss. Your fingers instantly find his hair and you can’t stop yourself from tugging on it, wanting him as close as possible.
It’s difficult to keep track of time in moments like this. It could be a minute or it could be 15 that go by as Matty teases you. His hands start exploring your body as you're happily trapped kissing him.
With the hand that’s not keeping him propped up, he lets it travel down your side, his touch leaving a hot trail of goosebumps erupting on your skin. You moan when your breasts get some more attention, him teasing you through your bralette and the curly haired man can’t help but want to hear more of your sweet sounds.
When his lips begin to trail down your jaw and neck, his hand gets lower too, moving from your tits down to your arse where he takes a handful of it and he pulls you towards him. That has you moaning because his knee is pressed directly between your legs and the friction, along with his lips now attacking to top of your breasts, has you dazed in pleasure.
There’s no way you won’t have some bruises from the intensity at which he kisses and grabs you, but you wouldn’t change anything about the situation you’re in. And Matty can tell by the way you’re moaning and tugging on his hair encouraging him that you’re enjoying yourself.
Matty absolutely loves the way you don’t even try to hold back your pleasured whines as he teases your neck with kisses. The only place he misses is where that ribbon choker of yours is tied around your neck, he wants to keep that on as long as possible so he moves the longer ends to the other side of your neck.
It’s when his lips find yours again that you lose track of time. To be honest, you wish you could stop time and keep the both of you like this forever with your hearts racing, lips getting even more swollen from the intensity of your kisses. You’d die a happy woman, but after a while it gets to the point where you need more.
With him lent forwards over you, kissing you with just as much intensity as when you started, you keep on finding your hips bucking up into him as your clit is getting the friction from you moving against his thigh. And the whines that you’re letting out that Matty swallows when his lips are against your own have him getting harder at the sound.
You need more, and he wants to give you more. So he lets his hand trail back down your body until he teases you by tracing the waistband of your pants. Only then does Matty break your kiss so he can look at you when he quietly asks, “Can I take these off you, baby?”
A small whine escapes your lips and nodding eagerly, you reply, “Please.”
His fingers very quickly undo the button and tug the zip down, and when that’s done you make sure to lift your hips up so it’s easier for him to peel the pants off you but when he goes to do that, they don’t seem to want to move.
Matty tries once more but they don’t budge, you’re about to let out a cry of frustration but his giggles reach your ears and a smile appears on your face.
“Looks like we need to stand up for this.” He looks so amused by the situation, it certainly rubs off on you and you’re both trying to hold back your laughs as you stand up and go to try again.
“Fucks sake,” You are cursing under your breath, chest heaving as you both try to pull down your leather pants but struggling with them going past your hips. “Maybe leather pants weren't the best move.” You let out a giggle, wiggling your way out of them.
“Oh no they were.” Matty shakes his head, immediately disagreeing with your joke. “They are so worth the trouble baby.”
Once he manages to pull them down further, by the time it gets to your mid thigh, the pants end up falling down on their own and pooling around your ankles. Your heels are quickly toed off then, your pants going somewhere behind you along with the shoes.
You’re so ready to resume things when he adds, “Though I prefer you without them.” And that’s enough to earn him a laugh, but he’s serious and he lets you know despite letting out a little giggle to match yours. “Look at you.” He says with his hands on your hips, his gaze going up and down your figure and he’s completely taken aback by how fucking beautiful you look even when you seem to be getting a little shy.
But you’re standing there only in your bralette, your black lace underwear and your ribbon choker tied around your neck, and the singer cannot believe his luck. There’s nothing more he wants than you, in any way you’ll let him have you.
The way he’s looking at you makes you so warm inside, feeling entirely comfortable with him despite what should have been a really awkward moment, he made it feel normal and made you feel safe with him. You cup both of his cheeks when you lean in to kiss him again and Matty’s hands wrap around your waist, pulling you back into him.
You direct him back to the bed, and Matty sits back on the side of it and you don’t hesitate to straddle him again. Matty has no issues with this at all, he takes full advantage of the situation and his hands grab your arse, squeezing it as he kisses you making you chuckle into your kiss.
As intensity builds between you again, Matty feels you lean forward into him clearly trying to encourage him to fall backwards, but he’s not having that. Instead he uses his grip that he has of you to quickly stand up with you in his arms before he moves the both of you properly onto your bed, with you beneath him how he wants.
“Nice try baby.” Matty shakes his head, and you giggle before he captures your lips again with his.
The both of you settle yourselves and you’re kissing for a while when Matty’s hips start grinding into yours and with how hard he is, your mind is reeling. You need more. And with your broken whines that he silences, Matty knows what you’re after already so he lets his hands trail down your body again.
When his finger hooks into the top of your underwear, you know what he's about to ask, so instead of him having to, you nod into your kiss and give an encouraging tug on his curls.
You thought he was going to pull them off you, but instead Matty trails his fingers down the line where your underwear meets the top of your thigh down to where you’re aching for him. He can feel how wet you are through the lace and it makes him groan into your kiss. But the way you gasp when he moves your underwear to the side and his fingers finally make contact with where you’re throbbing for him has you choking on air.
The teasing circles Matty starts leaving on your clit makes you break your kiss and you moan into your bedroom. Your reaction has the curly haired man smirking, fucking loving the way you react to him.
Matty kisses your neck when he lets his fingers tease your entrance, and the way you moan loudly when his fingers dip inside you has Matty having to bite his tongue so he doesn’t cum his pants there and then. You sound fucking heavenly and the fact Matty is drawing those sounds from you has him desperate to hear more.
Before he lets you get fully used to the sensation, he draws his fingers back up bringing your wetness up to your clit so he can carry on teasing you. This time he adds more pressure and with the way he sees your hips moving against his digits, he takes it as a cue to let you get yourself off on his hand.
Driven by the need of reaching your orgasm your hips grow erratic as his fingers are still pressing on your clit. Your face is scrunched up in pleasure, but when you open your eyes to look down where his hand is, you find him looking down at you with his mouth agape.
Little gasps leave his lips as your wetness coats his hand and you can see it written on his face how much this is sending him into overdrive but you need him inside you again, you’re getting so close to your climax that you’re growing desperate for him to resume what he was doing a minute ago.
So you bring one of your hands down to hold his wrist and, though it frustrates you for a second to have his fingers leave your clit, you guide his fingers back to your entrance.
You haven’t broken eye contact and that might be the one thing that makes him give into your wishes. He’s come to find out there’s nothing he can deny you when you’re staring straight into his eyes.
When his fingers sink back inside you, deeper this time, and his palm cups your clit, your whines and moans encourage him to continue.
“Matty - fuck, please.” And with the way you’re almost clawing through his shirt at his back, Matty isn’t one to argue with what you want.
He starts fucking you with his fingers, and he quickly gets to know what you like. You’re beyond easy to read and he loves that you aren’t holding anything back from him. He loves your whines, gasps, and moans. He’s thankful he can hear them over how loud he can hear his own heartbeat.
With all the teasing and the relentless rhythm of his fingers, it doesn’t take long for you to feel the familiar ache of your orgasm building.
Matty can feel and see how close you are. His eyes rarely leave your face, noting and memorising the way your muscles strain and the way you look when he does something he now knows you like, all bringing you towards your climax. But he uses that to his advantage, when he can tell you’re almost there, with one more curl of his fingers, Matty withdraws them completely.
“No,” You can’t help but let out a small whine at being left with nothing when you were mere seconds away from an orgasm.
But Matty doesn’t listen to your complaints. Instead, he draws his hand up from between your legs and as his brown eyes stare into yours, he instructs, “Open your mouth.”
You do as you’re told, your mind is too dopamine induced to argue, and you follow his instructions without question. You know what's coming anyway, and you’ll happily suck his fingers clean and make a show of it for him.
But that’s where you’re wrong. Instead, Matty surprises you by sucking his own fingers clean and you’re just watching him above you in awe. The way he moans at the taste of you has you staring at him and if your mouth wasn’t already open, it definitely would have fallen like that. He looks so fucking hot.
And when his eyes open, the lust he’s feeling is clear to see. But your heart stops when he withdraws his fingers and grabs your jaw, holding it open further and Matty leans down a little and spits into your mouth.
How your eyes don’t roll back in pleasure, you don’t know. You hum as you close your mouth and swallow, your hips roll in a subconscious effort to alleviate the ache between your legs but his thigh is a bit too far down for you to even get a hint of friction which makes you let out a loud whine.
“Good girl.” Matty smirks down at you, but before he can look too smug about the way you reacted you grab him with both your hands and pull him down into another heated kiss.
Your skin feels like it’s on fire now, and getting off with him is only making your need for release more urgent. Your brain continues to get more hazy with every single thing he does and the only coherent thought you can make out is the fact that you need him completely.
“Matty please,” If you weren’t so far gone by the lust, you wouldn’t have pleaded but these were desperate times now so you continue and voice your request, “I need more.”
He’s sure there’s not a day he’d choose to hear you not pleading to him like this but he still takes his chance to tease you with his words, “Greedy, greedy baby.”
Kissing his way down your neck, Matty fucking loves the way you react to his hot kisses. It’s like you can’t keep still for him, like your body is begging him to give you every ounce of pleasure.
When he starts kissing down your stomach, you know exactly what’s about to happen and your mind goes into overdrive. You can’t help but watch as the mess of curls gets lower and lower down your body, loving the feel of his lips and tongue teasing your skin as he goes.
Your erratic breathing doesn’t go unnoticed, but it only makes Matty more determined to give you the most intense orgasm of your life. He wants to drive you insane, have you so needy for him that you end up bursting on his tongue.
Matty looks up at you when he kisses the top of your thong, and once again you just nod, not needing him to verbalise the question. Although it's kind, you’re desperate for him, you would agree to anything he would offer you right now if it meant he’d be the one getting you off.
Getting to his knees, Matty pulls your underwear off you and he throws the material to the floor somewhere. As he moves himself further down the bed, he knocks your knees open and moves your legs over his shoulders, he doesn’t let his lust filled stare move from your eyes as his lips start trailing down the inside of your thighs.
If you thought he was a verbal tease, this is somehow even worse. The curly haired brunette takes his sweet time, kissing ever so slowly down your thigh before swapping to the other to repeat his actions, leaving your skin sensitive and more than likely bruised with all the attention he's showing you.
Your impatient whines as he does this have him smirking against your skin, and whilst you are loving it, the other side of you needs an orgasm after being edged earlier. You try and buck your hips up so his mouth gets closer to where you need it, but instead Matty tuts and wraps his arms around your thighs and holds your hips to keep you in place where he wants you.
“Patience is a virtue.” Matty smirks, going back and kissing over your thighs where he already has, and it has you trying and failing to move your hips to get him closer.
Slowly, you’re losing your mind though. The visual of him between your legs, the anticipation of the pleasure you’ll soon be feeling but currently being denied has you getting frantic.
“My virtue died when you fingered and edged me.” You say looking straight into his eyes, your skin still hot and heart still racing. Ardently, you demand, “Get to work.”
Matty just raises his eyebrows at you defiantly, and you know from just that look that you’re not getting anything more off him until you relent. And you’re too desperate to take any power back, so you just beg, “Please.” hoping he’ll show you some mercy.
Thankfully, he does. After kissing his way down, holding your thighs open even wider, Matty licks a bold stripe up from your entrance to your clit which has you releasing a guttural moan out into your room. The sound has Matty smirking as he starts flicking his tongue over your clit, loving the fact it’s him who’s the cause of them.
His tongue has your fingers clawing at your duvet, holding fistfuls of it as you give into how he’s making you feel. Your skin is hot, and with how sensitive everything building up to this has made you, it’s no surprise your breathing is laboured and your back arches in pleasure as he makes you feel everything so intensely.
Matty does this for a little while, teasing you, holding your thighs tighter when he feels the way your body twitches and spasms in response to his tongue. It’s not a hardship for him to learn what you like when you’re being as vocal as you are and he takes great pride in having you like this for him.
He eats you out like he kisses, like it’s all or nothing yet he’s making every effort to ensure you’re enjoying yourself, and with how wet he’s made you and the sounds leaving your pretty mouth, he knows you are. Matty’s entirely ravenous, needing to keep going and giving you all the pleasure he can, like he’s excited to finally be tasting you and he wants to keep tasting you.
Moaning against you as he sucks and plays with your clit has you having to grab onto his curls, pulling him towards you like he could get any closer. His half eyes close at the feeling, and you can’t stop yourself from glancing down at him as pleasured whines leave your mouth.
Somehow the view sets something else inside you alight. The fantasy you’ve had for so many years playing out in front of you, Matty’s head actually between your thighs looking blissed out and completely content as if there’s no place he’d rather be than here tasting you.
Matty can’t help but moan against you as you start moving your hips up and down as he eats you. The noises you’re making along with the way you’re pulling in his hair encouraging him to continue, mixed with the way you taste has Matty’s eyes closing in complete bliss.  
You can feel the way he grinds his hips against your mattress, the man clearly seeking some relief as well. And you would feel bad about it but you don’t have a chance to because the curly haired man dips his head and starts fucking you with his tongue.
Your jaw drops as your thighs tighten around his head, your own falling back against the soft bedding and Matty’s hands tighten around you keeping you exactly where he needs you. His nose bumps against your clit even has you mewling small “ah”s for him.
Matty’s moans cause vibrations to run up through your body, making you pull on his hair even tighter. He goes between fucking you with his tongue and using it to tease your clit, his chin covered in your slick at this point but he’s having far too much fun to care.
Your hand that’s not rooted in Matty’s hair, you use to tease yourself. Grabbing your boob through the bralette and pinching your nipple through the material and you moan at that along with the bliss you’re receiving from Matty’s tongue. But then the curly haired brunette notices what you’re doing and he releases one of your thighs and reaches up your body to do the same to your other boob and the ache in your lower stomach starts feeling almost too intense.
“Matty,” You keep moaning but this time he knows he has you on the verge of cumming. Even though his jaw has started to ache, he doubles his efforts now, knowing he has you exactly where he’s wanted you for days, weeks, and months. And he’s not going to stop until you’re completely fucked out for him.
Your thighs are starting to tremble, and your grip on his hair is so hard he thinks you could pull it out. The stimulation is almost too much for you, it’s making your whole body feel like it’s on fire and you know well enough by now it’s because your body is dying for relief.
“F-fuck, please.” You beg, and Matty hums as he suckles hard on your clit, confirming he’s going to make you finish. And after making your back arch a few more times with his various tricks, you start to tremble and you choke on a loud moan as you come undone.
Matty can help but watch as you fall apart beneath him. He dips his head back so he can lap up your juices and he moans loudly at the taste and sight of you.
He doesn’t relent until you start pushing him off, but even then he licks your swollen clit one more time before he starts kissing his way up your body again. Even then, you're too dazed by that intense orgasm to notice the way he’s appreciating your body.
It feels like ages when you’re coming back down from your high, your chest heaving as you try to get oxygen back into your lungs and your cheeks start burning up when you open your eyes and you find him looking down at you with a satisfied smirk on his face.
Hair dishevelled from you pulling on it so much and the pink on his cheeks makes him look so fucking stunning, you’re dying to show him just how much you like him. Especially after he’s made you see stars.
You’re just dying to return the favour.
Your eyes fall down to see him and when you realise Matty’s basically still dressed, you frown at him. “You’ve got way too many clothes on.”
His shirt is still half tucked into his pants, only the buttons undone which is the one thing you managed to do earlier but even the undone bowtie is still hanging around his neck.
The smirk on his face grows bigger, “Gotta dress properly for a meal, haven’t I?” His sarcasm is heavy to tease you once more and you roll your eyes in fake annoyance.
“You’re such a little shit.” You state as a scolding, your hands going straight for his shirt to take it off him and throw it somewhere on the floor behind him.
The bowtie goes with it and soon, your fingers are working to undo the button of his trousers, tugging them down far easier than yours were. To fully take them off he stands up and you sit yourself up at the edge of the bed, watching him toe of his shoes before getting fully rid of his pants.
A few seconds later Matty is standing in front of you, only in his underwear, his taut muscles on show and his skin littered with the tattoos you’ve grown fond of over the years. You catch a glimpse of the new tattoo he got at one of the last shows of the north american tour, which reads ‘I’m a man’.
The whole view has filthy ideas sparking in your mind and you truly don’t have a filter anymore because once you see him taking the short couple of steps he has to get back to you, you let one of those ideas slip.
“I want you to fuck my mouth.” You say looking up at him with doe eyes, your mouth watering at the thought of him using you to get off.
Matty is sure his soul leaves his body when you say that and his throat dries up at the image you’ve just put in his head.
He has no idea what to say, thoughts fully gone and out of the window until you speak again, repeating what you want him to do.
Your hand comes to hold his left thigh and you teasingly and slowly let it brush upwards and closer to the edge of his underwear, “Baby, please fuck my mouth.”
Letting out a guttural groan, Matty rolls his eyes back in pleasure. You using that nickname for him always does it, he always ends up right in the palm of your hands when you utter the word to refer to him.
His hands come to cup your jaw and slightly tip your head backwards a bit more just so he’s sure he’s looking right in your eyes as he asks for reassurance, “Are you sure?”
“Mhm,” You hum in agreement, and tilt your head to the side to kiss the palm of one of his hands. With that look that you’re giving him, he can’t even think of denying you a thing and it’s like you know exactly how to get him to say yes to anything you want when you use the sweetest voice to add another, “Please?”
He wants to tell you that you don’t even have to say that word ever again but the urge to kiss you hot and hard is stronger. He crashes your lips together with such force you lean back and have to rest on one of your elbows to stay seated.
You kiss feverishly while your hands travel down his chest to his lower stomach and then slowly trail your index finger down to his hard cock.
Just that ghost of a touch has him shakily breathing, breaking the kiss as his face contorts in almost pain with the way he just wants to fully give into the pleasure but if he does then he’d burst right here, right now.
Your lips brush his parted lips as you smirk when your hand comes to squeeze his hard on and you slowly start stroking him up and down over the fabric of his boxers.
Matty lets out the prettiest sounds and you’re fucking obssessed with them so you don’t let up on your actions, only getting more intently with it, that is until he bites on his bottom lip and silences himself.
Only hearing low hums of pleasure then has you frowning because you don’t want to be deprived of the noises he makes so without a second thought you let go of him only to get rid of the last piece of clothing.
From the way he rushes through getting them off, you know he’s eager and you are too so when he’s back in front of you as close as he can get for it to be comfortable, you lick your lips and wrap your right hand around his hard cock.
The tip is already glistening with precum and red which makes you think about just how much he must’ve been throbbing, constricted in his trousers while he paid all of his attention to you.
That notion only makes you even more excited to let him use your mouth to get off and with that set in mind, you give him a few more strokes before sinking your mouth down on him.
You hum around him, your mouth being full of him and tasting him has your eyes rolling back into your head, and the loud moan he lets out only adds to it all. Your thighs clench together as you quickly get worked up by it all.
You only bob your head up and down a few times, trying to go as deep as you can and gagging around him to get you prepared for it. You breathe deeply through your nose and relax your jaw every time you go to fully take him all the way to the back of your throat, your nose almost hitting his pelvis.
Your eyes water as you take him and it’s such a sinful scene just from the sounds of your gagging and his loud moans mixing together.
One of your hands comes up to his hip then, stopping your movements and encouraging him to thrust into your mouth. He gets the instruction right away and he starts mindfully giving into your wishes. You can’t help but become a mess of moans when his hips start moving.
Matty is being gentle though, and even though he keeps grunting and moaning as he fills your mouth and your throat, it isn’t quite like you want it to be. He’s not even hitting as deep as he was when you were doing it at the start so, stopping his movements, you pull back and let go of his cock for a moment.
He’s breathless, panting, all sweaty and flushed. It is certainly a gorgeous sight seeing him all fucked out because of you but you force yourself to not get distracted when you’re meant to call him out on how his holding back.
“Thought I was clear when I said I wanted you to fuck my mouth.” Is what you say, sternly with an eyebrow raised.
He has to take a deep breath at your words but then he comes clean about his worries, “I won’t last if I do that, baby.”
And it’s true, Matty has been trying so hard to be concentrated and not cum the second you’ve touched him, it’s gonna be impossible for him to last any longer if he goes through with what you’re asking.
But you dismiss it, “I don’t care, I want you to do it properly.” And when you finish your demands with a serious, “Fill my throat.” Matty is fully gone.
His eyes darken at your words, looking down at you with pure lust and you look up at him with mischief written all over your face.
Your mouth falls open slowly and before you can pull him closer, he does by hooking his finger on the ribbon choker that’s still tied around your neck. He has his other hand wrapped around his cock which is painfully hard now, stroking himself twice before homing it on your mouth once again, and the warm wetness of it has him stuttering a, “Fuck baby–”
You’re mewling when his hips buck into your face and he hits the back of your throat, your eyes watering again, yet he still is being too careful with it. So with the intent to make him desperate for release, you bring one of your hands down to play with his balls.
That seems to do it because Matty gets louder and his pace gets increasingly faster, you’re fully just mindful now of relaxing your jaw so he can keep milking himself with the tightness of your throat.
Your hand doesn’t stop cupping and teasing his balls and that ends up making him lift his right leg up to prop his foot up right beside your hip and the new angle seems to be his undoing.
It’s pure desperation that has him going faster, tears are running down your face now and your spit is falling down your chin to your neck. You’re throbbing and the clenching of your thighs isn’t even helping anymore, so you start grinding down on your bed and it’s all that which is making you let out noises of unmatchable pleasure.
His hand comes to your head, fingers tangling in your hair so he can keep a bit of consistency in his movements which are growing sloppy when you start to feel him twitch in your mouth. When he looks down at you though, it’s like it all heightens. Seeing himself disappear into your mouth has his mind spinning and it’s a sight that will be forever engraved in his mind.
“Baby-,” He tries to talk but it’s all interrupted by his own gasps and moans, “Gonna cum.”
Your wordless answer to that is helping him achieve his climax so as he thrusts into you, you suck a little harder and tease your tongue underneath the tip of his cock and it is that which tips him over the edge. The visual is better than anything he could’ve imagined nights before when he thought of you as he got himself off or any of the dreams he’d had when you were the one to star in them.
It only takes a few more messy thrusts for him to coat your throat with his cum and you’re sure that you’ll never forget the loud groans he’s letting out.
He continues to ride his orgasm out, his hips faltering and slowing down but you have enjoyed this so much, you’re the one that continues their movements to make his pleasure last longer.
That only lasts a half of a minute though, his senses are fully going into overdrive and he cannot take any more, especially when he feels you suck him again. So with the hand that’s still tangled in your hair, he pulls you carefully off him.
Matty watches you completely dazed as you catch the last of his cum that’s dripped down the corner of your mouth when he pulled out. You make a show of sucking the finger you just caught it with, rolling your eyes at the taste of him, grinding your hips down on your bed again.
His finger comes to hook on your choker again then as he leans down to kiss you but before he locks your lips together, he looks right into your eyes and says, “You’re fucking unreal baby.”
You give him a smirk which is short lived as he attacks your lips quickly after he’s spoken. It’s hot and desperate, growing even harsher when he tastes himself on your tongue.
You’re pushed back on the bed again, and he pulls you further up as he hovers over you. One of his hands travels down to your breasts and he starts playing with them as you both get off.
From what’s just happened, you are already so worked up that you become desperate to have him do something about it. So you break the kiss, gasping for air when he pinches one of your nipples with the perfect amount of strength that has you seeing stars.
“Matty,” You start saying as you’re trying to catch your breath, but you can’t seem to find your words anymore when he kisses down your neck and starts sucking bruises onto it. “Matty-” You try once again but it only encourages him to continue more intently.
He hums as if asking you ‘what?’ but he isn’t really paying attention, he’s too focused on making you feel good after the mindblowing orgasm you’ve just given him.
You’re somehow growing hotter under him, as if you weren’t almost fully naked, and it just becomes even worse when he finishes sucking on a certain spot and he’s met with the ribbon tied around your neck, which he ends up undoing by tugging one of the ends with his teeth.
You feel a little tightness around your neck for a fraction of a second and when you see him pulling the ribbon with his teeth, you give him a pathetically loud moan in response. His hand comes up to get rid of it and throws it behind himself to continue with his attack on the skin of your neck.
You swear you’re going insane with every passing second so you force yourself to make up a proper sentence for your own sanity.
“Matty, I need you to do something.” Your hips buck up in search to grind against his but he’s purposely keeping himself hovered further up than you can reach comfortably. “I’m so fucking wet, please.”
Every one of your begs are being stored in the forefront of Matty’s mind, and it only encourages him to get more of them if he’s being honest. Yet, you’ve been so good to him, he thinks he might as well just give you something that could help you feel less frustrated.
He kisses down your chest, focusing on the top of your breasts, and teasing his tongue over your nipples over the fabric of your bralette. You whine out in frustration and he chuckles at you but his hands come under your body so he can undo the clasp of it and free you from your last item of clothing.
Once the clasp is undone, you carelessly take it off you and throw it to the floor with much more strength than necessary. Once again, your desperation has him laughing but you’re not finding this funny at all so one of your hands comes to root in his hair and tug on it, so he does something.
That has him wrapping his lips around one of your nipples and the gasp you let out is louder than you’d find needed. But you’re just so desperate for anything that his tongue flattening over your nipple, flicking it and sucking it could fully be enough to make you cum again.
And it turns out that you are that desperate because with you begging for more, Matty smirks as he continues teasing you with his mouth but takes pity on you and he drops his hand back down between your legs and he fingers you again. As his fingers carry on fucking you and his lips continue to tease, there’s no way you’re able to hold back the noises you let out as your senses are completely clouded by every bit of pleasure he’s giving you. It seems like in a matter of a few seconds you’re being completely tipped over the edge and you lose all control over your own body.
Matty watches you entirely astounded by your moans and the way you convulse and arch under him. To add to your pleasure Matty drops his hand back to simultaneously use his thumb to tease your clit, prolonging your high.
He does so until you push his hand away, entirely satisfied and a little too overstimulated. Closing your eyes and taking deep breaths as you come back around a little quicker this time and you’re glad you do because the man who’s the cause of all your pleasure decides he’s going to be cute again.
“I think I’m obsessed with you.” Matty admits as he rests himself down, half on top of you, so he can hide himself into the crook of your neck.
“Yeah,” You nod, still catching your breath. You bring your hand up that’s not trapped between Matty and your side up and route your fingers into his curls, “I think I feel the same way about you.”
You can feel Matty’s smile against your neck when you say that, and it makes you smile too as you stare at your ceiling, trying to get your breathing to return back to normal. As you play with his hair, you quickly run back through everything that’s just happened and you can’t help the small, “Holy shit.” that leaves your lips.
If foreplay and oral was that good with him, god only knows how you’re going to survive after he actually fucks you.
Matty brings you out of your thoughts though as you hear and feel him chuckle into your neck. It has you grinning at the low noise and the feeling of his lips against your neck, you can’t help but quietly ask, “What?”
“I can’t believe you were so turned on from giving me head that I just made you finish from playing with your boobs.” Matty hums, not entirely sure that he isn’t dreaming.
Despite that not being the only thing he did, you can’t believe how turned on him doing that made you. You guess it’s true what they say, good sex is psychological. And with the way you feel about Matty, it's no doubt actually having some feelings there for him has made this experience better, and you’re sure he would say the same.
But you don’t want to let him have that, so instead of agreeing, you tell him as you twist your hair around your fingers, “Don’t let it feed your ego.”
Matty hums as if taking your comment into consideration, but he sighs, “Too late.”
You’re more than likely never going to hear the end of this now, even if he’s pushing the borders of the truth. He has all the ammunition to keep you flustered at all times now. But you’ll deal with that another day.
Chuckling a little at his admission of a fueled ego, you shake your head a little as you playfully say, “You're a dickhead.”
Matty props himself up to look down over you then, and you love the way he still look a little fucked out. But clearly the man is now in the mood to tease and you know what’s coming before he even opens his mouth.
He smirks down at you, “A dickhead who just gave you an orgasm by licking y-”
Cutting him off, you lean up and kiss him so you don’t have to hear it. You know he’s joking, but you’ll take any excuse to have his lips on your own.
He kisses you sweetly and you both can’t really help the way you’re smiling into it. Happiness is exuding from the both of you, and neither of you would change a thing about this moment for the world.
Matty is utterly obsessed with you. He can’t get over the way his heart has been racing since the moment his eyes landed on you when you arrived at the restaurant.
He feels so beyond lucky he even got a second date with you, that you even have an interest in getting to know him on a deeper level. The singer does truly love your first date but this one has meant the absolute world to him and for it to finish off like this despite the both of you flirting, he really does feel so lucky.
And you’re so fucking gorgeous. Even before he got your clothes off he knew you were, but the fact he is lucky enough to see you and experience you like you are, he won't ever take it for granted. And he’s kissing you now hoping that the gesture can say all of this for him whilst he slowly gets the courage to say it outloud to you someday.
Your sweet moment together slowly turns heated again as your kisses grow in intensity. It somehow manages to go from soft and playful to you dragging groans and whines out of each other and your grasping at each other's skin. Until it goes further.
It’s still a little surreal getting off with him, making out earnestly drawing moans from him by the way your fingers tug on his hair, the way your lips meet, and the way your bodies so effortlessly turn the other on. Matty makes a show of letting his hands start wondering again, teasing your skin with gentle caresses until he has you gasping for breath again.
He takes his time edging you again, getting you close enough that you almost finish only to leave you unsatisfied and desperate for more. And he’s taking great pride in his work as you can feel his smile against your lips every time he shuts your whining and whimpering up with his kisses.
“Matty, please.” You beg, not being able to wait any longer. You need him.
“What do you want, baby?” Matty asks between kissing you despite knowing you want the exact same as him. He’s hard again now and he’s dying for you at this point, but that doesn’t stop him from demanding, “Tell me what you need.”
“Need you to fuck me.” You whine, pulling on the curls on the back of his head so he looks into your eyes as you plead, “Please.”
Matty nods, wanting nothing more than to be inside you, he asks, “Do you have any condoms?”
Whilst he did bring one just in case, he didn’t really want it to seem presumptuous by going getting his. Thankfully, you nod, and quickly reach over to your bedside drawer and Matty watches as you pluck out a clearly new and unopened box to get one out for him.
Matty doesn’t really know why he likes that you’ve got an unopened box of them. He doesn’t know if it’s because maybe you bought them especially to use with him, hoping that the date would work out well enough that you’d both get to this part of the night.
Or maybe it just makes him feel special because he’s hoping with everything he has that you hadn’t been with anyone recently. That just maybe you had been waiting for him like he had been waiting for his tour to finish so he could go on this date with you.
And it’s that tinge of what he recognises to be jealousy that pokes at his chest that makes him realise the one thing he wants is to have you only to himself. He knows it’s early and completely rushed from him but he can’t deny himself that you’re the one who makes him feel best these days and there’s no moment he doesn’t have you in his mind.
So he’s not surprised when this ghost of possessiveness comes over him when thinking of you this way with anyone else, it’s something he wishes he hadn't even thought of in the first place.
Watching you under him, giving him a small smirk before opening up the box, has him hoping with every bit of his soul that you want him for yourself the same way he just wants you.
You wiggle your eyebrows as you shake the box, the wrappers inside making a little noise when hitting the sides of the cardboard and the sight is enough to earn a chuckle from him.
“You think you’ve got enough?” He teases you, nudging your nose with his and stealing a peck before turning his attention back at your fingers getting one of the square foil packets out of the box.
“If we wanna get through what we’ve both been planning, no, probably not.” You chuckle and Matty can’t help but giggle as he traps you in a kiss after he takes the condom from you.
The box falls on the floor, the rest of the condoms spilling out but there’s no time to focus on the small mess when you’ve got Matty hungrily kissing you and your whole body lighting up once more tonight.
It’s the built up anticipation for what is about to happen that has you both desperate and, due to your previous orgasms, overly sensitive to every touch of your skin.
The way his fingers are clutching the side of your waist with such intent, you pulling him closer to you by your tangled fingers in his curls, your pebbled nipples rubbing against his chest, his knee in between your thighs propping your legs open.
Your senses are going into overdrive, both of you gasping already in the kiss and the heavier your breaths get, the less patience you both have. Leaving a few chaste kisses on your lips, Matty brings the wrapper up to his mouth and rips it open with his teeth.
You fully gasp under him, loud enough for him to hear you over his heartbeat which is ringing in his ears and that only has him needing you more desperately, he wants to draw more of your sweet sounds out of you. After tonight, he’s not really sure there’ll be a time he will have listened to them enough. Impossible.
Watching as he throws the now empty packet and rolls the condom down himself makes you subconsciously drag your fingers down your body until you can touch yourself and, with slow circles on your clit, get yourself some much needed relief.
Your relief is short-lived as your back arching off the bed when you apply a bit more of pressure has him taking your hand off yourself, wrapping his fingers around your wrist to bring your fingers to his mouth and sucks on them.
Seeing his eyes roll back at the taste of you on your fingers has your jaw dropping, and you’re so far gone by the view that you barely register him smirking as he slowly drops your hand to rest on the bed over your head, pinning it there with his left hand and taking his right hand back down around himself.
Matty brings you down to Earth again when he taps on your swollen clit with his cock, so quick they have you gasping as your attention is back on him. He chuckles seeing you fall apart so easily under him but when you glare at him, he presses his lips together so his amusement is less obvious.
“Stop teasing Matty.” Your tone stern and you’re still glaring at him to get a move on but unfortunately that only encourages him to elongate your desperation a bit more. He just likes to hear you begging at this point and pushing your buttons to see how far it takes you to reach that point is certainly something he’s really enjoyed finding out about.
He teases you once more, running the tip of his cock down to your entrance but back up to tease your clit once more which has you bucking your hips up into his. Hearing you mutter a pathetic ‘please’ again has Matty giving in to what you both desperately want.
After lining himself up, he pushes into you slowly, letting you accommodate to him as you both moan into the other's mouth at the overwhelming feeling. The pleasurable stretch of him filling you has you writhing beneath him, your nails scratching down his shoulder blade and your whines filling the room.
When he bottoms out, Matty clenches his jaw to try not to finish there and then. He focuses down on you, your pretty mouth that’s fallen open with everything you’re feeling and your eyes closed in what he hopes is pleasure.
The curly haired brunette lets his nose gently brush back and forth across yours as he quietly says, “Let me know when I can move baby.”
You hum a little to acknowledge him, and after a few seconds you nod before asking, “Please move.” at the same time your hips try to move against his own.
With how much you’ve both been waiting for this very moment, it isn’t hard for you both to set a pace that has your toes curling in pleasure. Your hips moving and meeting in the middle, his pubic bone hitting your clit at just the right intensity, your mouths swallowing each other’s moans.
In an attempt to make both of you more comfortable and change the position a little without switching completely, because you really want to see each other coming undone, he lifts one of his knees further up under yours and therefore takes one of your legs with it.
He leans forward a bit more and the new angle has you throwing your head back in bliss, unable to keep kissing him when a guttural moan comes from deep in your chest. And Matty fucking loves it, he loves feeling how you’ve lost the rhythm your hips were taking, faltering until you stop and it’s him left to keep up the pace which is now the faintest bit slower but harder.
But you’re so overcome with pleasure that you can’t seem to lift your head back up for enough time to see him or even keep your eyes open and look at him like you’d like to. He’s hitting that spot time and time again and he’s so close to you that your eyes keep screwing shut and rolling back.
And you know that looking at you is one thing he wants too because his hand comes up to cup your jaw and between grunts, he says, “Baby, look at me.” You make your best effort to at least keep your half open eyes on his face and it’s certainly hard when he’s making you feel this good but you try your best.
“Eyes on me okay?” Matty asks you again and your answer is a mewled, “Mhm.”
Staring straight into his eyes as he pounds into you makes you feel you’re having an experience out of this world. Seeing his brows furrow over his glistening brown eyes and the moans and gasps that leave his lips and hit your own open mouth, have you clenching around him.
You’re so close now, your proximity and your unwavering gaze on each other have multiplied every single sensation tenfold and you know he notices it too because he’s now the one having trouble keeping his eyes closed and not letting his head hang.
His pace is growing erratic now, trying to reach your orgasms but allowing the buildup to last a bit longer. Yet he doesn’t really know how much longer he can go when your walls are so tight around him, trying to milk him dry.
But you want to see his gorgeous eyes again, so you let your hand cup his cheek and you watch in delight as his eyes find yours again.
He dips his head a little, letting his lips find the top of your wrist so he kisses over your riot tattoo before he starts kissing his way up your palm. Smiling, you let him carry on until you end up resting your thumb over his swollen lips.
Yours are still apart, letting every noise fall from your mouth without hesitation. The way his hips hit your own have him instilling pleasure into you already, but then he goes and adds to it with another visual that is going to be burned into your retinas for the rest of your days.
Matty parts his lips as he thrusts into you, biting down on the tip of your thumb. It somehow excites you that little bit more, but what really gets you is when he dips his head further and he sucks on your thumb.
And because your hips buck up to meet his own the next time he thrusts into you, as you moan beneath him, you feel the vibration of his as your thumb presses down on his tongue.
Watching him through hooded eyes, you see his lips pursing around your finger and still sucking on it and the way he hums around it before letting it go with a pop has your mind spinning.
You can feel yourself pulsing around him now, so close finally getting relief after being denied it for what feels like an age. With your heart hammering in your ears and Matty’s moans gracing them too, it’s not long until he has you on edge.
It only takes a few more thrusts from him to have you finishing for the third time. The sound of your moans get caught in your throat as your fingers curl into Matty’s hair and your nails scratch down his back. Your back arches with the intensity of the orgasm that has you seeing white, it’s almost too much - too good.
Matty’s jaw falls open with a loud groan seeing your come undone and at the feeling of your clenching around him. It’s a miracle he manages to thrust into you a few more times without cumming himself as he wants to help you ride out your high. But the feeling gets the best of him, he finishes a few seconds after you.
He tries to hold himself up best he can, but he wants to be as close to you as possible. Without crushing you, he falls completely against you and he lets his forehead rest against yours as you both feel every ounce of pleasure as he grinds his hips against yours.
Your orgasms linger for a while, both of you sweaty messes tightly wrapped around each other, neither one of you wanting to move. When you open your eyes a little, you can’t help but smile at the closeness, and Matty’s eyes open a little as well and he whispers, “You’re unreal baby.”
Not caring about the fact that he has you chuckling, the curly haired brunette moves his jaw so he can softly kiss you again. You’re positively obsessed with his mouth and the way that even the little kisses you share have your lips tingling and heart racing.
Matty kisses you again as he pulls out of you, almost as an apology of sorts at the small whimper you released. But you don’t mind and graciously accept the kiss before Matty moves himself so he’s lying beside you and he takes the condom off and puts it in the bin.
Both of you are still entirely out of breath, now looking at the ceiling because there's nothing more either of you can do than try to control your heavy breathing. You feel like you’re having an out of body experience. That was too good to be true.
Your whole body still feels like it’s tingling, the excess oxytocin clearly still lingering in your bloodstream really making every little memory of what just happened feel great even thinking about it. Before you can mentally relive it all though, you feel Matty turn his head to look at you.
The curly haired brunette admits, “I really like you.”
His heart is hammering in his chest, from your previous activities, but also because he couldn’t keep that bit of information to himself any longer. He had to tell you, despite him not realising he’s already drunkenly told you once before.
Hearing that has you turning your head to look at him. And just seeing the way he’s staring at you with so many emotions in his eyes that you can’t quite decipher yet has your heart swelling. Because despite not being able to place every single feeling, you can tell he’s being honest and vulnerable.
So you don’t hold back for a second and you let the biggest grin take over your face as you admit, “I really like you too.”
You do see the relief flood his features then though, and you can’t stop yourself from rolling on your side towards him, forcing another sweet kiss upon him.
“I meant it when I said I was obsessed with you, you know?” You tell him, feeling the need to remind him.
“Mhhh,” Matty hums in delight, “If you keep reminding me I won’t let you out of my sight ever again.”
“Obsessed.” You grin, letting it be an accusation and confirmation all in one. You let your noses touch again, giving him an eskimo kiss before you connect your lips with his again to give him a proper one.
Matty lets you briefly escape to use the bathroom, him very much liking the visual of you getting up and bending down to collect his shirt from the floor just to put it on as you walk into the other room. What he doesn’t like is that you’ve buttonned it up a little at the front when you come back out and you’re back to hiding your gorgeous body from him.
As much as he tries to get it off you, when you lie back down beside him, he only manages a few buttons until you distract him again with rogue kisses. And regardless, you still look hot as fuck in just his shirt and he’s not complaining seeing you only in that.
He raises his arm up over your shoulder and rests it over your back, rubbing up and down your waist over the material as he grins, “You look so good in my shirt.”
You smile, not letting his words fluster you this time. Taking the compliment, you ask, “Do I now…?”
“Really fucking good, stunning.” He puckers his lips wanting you to kiss him again and you do so with a smile. He smiles into the kiss too and when he pulls away he lets his eyes run down your body again and says, “Remind me to let you steal all my clothes.”
Tilting your head to the side, you raise your eyebrows and warn him, “Don’t tempt me.”
“You’re more than welcome to, baby.” Matty grins, but then adds a clause, “Only if I can take them off you.”
Grinning, you agree not expecting anything less, “I don’t think there was ever another option.”
“Good.” Matty nods, and with his other hand he cups your cheek and lifts it a little to get a good look at your pretty face. He smiles as you look so good, but he does notice that, “You look tired.”
Chuckling a little, you nod, “Nothing new there.”
“We should nap.” Matty tells you, pulling you by your waist into him a little more, “We should skip the party and cuddle all night.”
“No, we can’t do that.” You shake your head. Although, you are quite tired after your activities and the fact you got such little sleep last night, so you give in to one of his ideas, “We can take a short nap and then we’re going.”
The curly haired brunette pouts, asking, “Why can’t we stay?”
“Because we can’t just not show up to your best mates’ New Years party.” You laugh, pecking his lips again so the pout disappears, and when it does, you add, “Plus Amelia is coming too so I have to be there or else she’ll start chatting shit about me replacing her for you and standing her up.”
Matty snorts a little at that because he playfully accused George of the exact same thing when he started seeing Charli. He loves that your friendships have exactly the same vibe, he knows for a fact that you’d all get on well together.
Despite this though, Matty still powers through, wanting to have you alone and in his arms for as long as possible tonight. “Well, you can give Amelia a lovely visual of what kept you from her and I’m sure she’ll understand.”
Laughing, you shake your head in fake disbelief, “You’re such an idiot.”
“You’re obsessed with me though.” Matty grins, stroking his thumb across the apple of your cheek as he looks into your gorgeous eyes.
“A tiny bit maybe.” You smile, pinching your thumb and index finger together so they almost touch to demonstrate how small your obsession is.
Cocking his head a little, narrowing his eyes he accuses, “Downplaying it a bit there baby.”
“Don’t start now.” You shake your head, knowing he’s trying to get you flustered for him again but you’re not having it right now.
“What?” He tries to play innocent, acting all confused about your accusations.
But you soon cut him off, reminding him, “You’re more obsessed with me so…”
And once again he has you melting into him when he replies, “Damn, you’re right. I am.”
He makes you shriek when he nuzzles his head eagerly in your neck, his nose tickling the crook of your neck and the sensation of his curls on your skin making you giggle. His fingers clutch you tight into him by your waist, his tickling on your neck stops then and it’s replaced by short little kisses being littered on your skin.
You’re grinning like a fool with your eyes almost closed when he lifts his head up to look at you. “Are you keeping them leather pants on for me tonight then?” Matty can’t help but smirk a little.
“No, I reckon they were just for you.” You smile, feeling like you should dress up a little nicer, in something that Matty will like, but that also shows “I’ll change it up.”
Matty hums, certainly interested in anything you wear. You never miss the mark, “Have anything in mind?”
Thinking about it for a moment, you pick something out mentally and nod, “Yes, but it’s a surprise.”
“Awh,” Matty coos, kissing your lips a few times to butter you up so you confess when he asks, “You wanna surprise me?“
“Not you,” You shake your head, and jokingly say, “George.”
Matty playfully frowns at you, but pretending like he isn’t the jealous one, he tries to get you to change your answer by saying, “Charli would love that, sure.”
“I would hope she does.” You nod eagerly, not being able to hide your grin when you jog his memory a little, “Remember, I’d go for both of them.”
“Would you?” The curly haired brunette gives you a look of disbelief, and he looks down and gestures to the both of you as he asks again, “After this?”
“Yes.” You confirm boldly with a proud nod.
Matty scoffs loudly, “Bitch.” before he pushes you off him and he moves so he can be the one to hover just above you for a second.
He has the both of you laughing, and he knows you don’t mean it from the look on your face and your genuine laughter at the conversation. You just love doing whatever you can to wind him up, and you’ve certainly found a way to do it and are running with it.
“Why are you so energetic?” You can’t help but ask, “Aren’t you tired?”
“Am not.” Matty chuckles, but then he cheekily gives you a knowing smile, “You were right saying you were a Grandma.”
But you act just the same and give him his banter right back, “And you really did go through with the meaning of gilf.” and Matty loves the little giggle you let out at that.
“I’m very serious about my goals.” Matty tries to keep his smirk at bay but with your big grin it's a little difficult.
You tut and shake your head dismissively, “You always have an answer for everything, don’t you?”
“You know me.” Matty cackles and you hum in agreement against his lips as he kisses you again.
Afterwards, Matty lies himself back down and pulls you against him, and he urges you to get under the covers and get comfortable which you easily oblige to. The both of you talk for a while longer, your head resting near the top of his shoulder and his arm is around your back and you chat for a while.
With you Matty finds himself never wanting a conversation to end, but he knows you’re slowly falling asleep as your voice quietens down and your responses get a little slower until they are hums filled with gibberish. But the singer doesn’t mind, even he is getting tired now after the unforgettable dessert you’ve just had.  
A quick nap certainly won’t hurt anyone. He never promised George that you both would be at the party for any specific time before midnight, so he lets himself give into the post sex fatigue.
Soaking in the feeling of falling asleep with you in his arms, he feels truly content, and it only gets better when you cuddle yourself into him a little bit more when his hold around your waist tightens.
You let out a hum of bliss right in his ear and the sound is enough for him to know he wants you around for what he hopes is a while if time allows it. God help him, he really really likes you and he hopes with every bit of him that he doesn’t fuck anything up. He wouldn’t forgive himself.
But he doesn’t let himself think of things going wrong, like even the passing thought could jinx it, so he allows himself to enjoy this very moment: you laying in his arms, with your face hidden in his neck, your legs tangled together and your hand over his chest.
At first, he prays you can’t feel his erratic heart beating out of his chest, but on second thought, he actually hopes that in your hazy mind you can take in the palpable proof of the way you make him feel. He’s a complete mess for you, and he’s so eager to see where this can go.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 |
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A/N: Me and @alovesreading are going to go and repent for our sins now! See you soon for Part 6 x
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ninothebirb · 5 months
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WE WERE ONCE ONE
part!1: Prologue
Content Warning!: Angst, Fluff?, gn!reader, unhealthy obsessions, graphic depictions of violence (rarely), trauma, spoilers!, (Some of the lore here is accurate cuz i did my research😡) Note: The reader is part of the high cloud quintet- and is also a long life species. So they are vulnerable to mara- but Bailu helps in keeping it suppressed. They still have some amount of control on themselves.
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🌘 🦁 🐉 ❤️‍🩹 💀
When the high cloud quintet broke apart years ago, you isolated yourself away from people- only ever paying attention to the new found creation made by Dan Feng: Bailu. She was so clever, so smart and so much like him. It seemed as if he had pulled a part of his loving personality and inserted it all into her.
Nevertheless, you adored her. She was like your own child, a sibling, a friend, a companion. She had won the hearts of many people, being a healer that is- but. There will always be those who never let of the past. She was still a sin committed by Dan Feng, a being who shouldn't exist.
You often visited the statue of the once honored Vidhyadara Prince at Scalegorge Waterscape, where the Dragon palace was located. You would place flower, bouquets- even certain trinkets at the edge of the statue, and pray for his wellbeing. For you wondered, no- you knew he was alive. He was somewhere out there, and he would return for you someday.
It was an unhealthy obsession of yours, letting yourself completely depend upon the thought that Dan Feng will come back for you. He hadn't been killed- he had just been banished. And despite knowing that his memories had been wiped out after rebirth- your reason for living was purely based on the fact that he was alive.
Bailu had told you so many times, let go of him. Even if he does come back he wouldn't have a clue of what's going on, let alone be allowed to enter the loufu. However much you tried- you always returned to him. No- not him, but his memory. You sobbed lonely into the nights, often being comforted by Bailu herself.
Jing Yuan had become general, he had attempted to visit you- comfort you, assure you that not all is lost. He used to be your best friend, the one you could always rely on after Dan Feng when thinsg went wrong. But you detested him now, you wouldn't speak to him or look at him. It was all his fault- his his his.
"Will you not pull so hard-?!" Bailu asked with a pout, you were so absorbed in your thoughts that you completely forgot about brushing bailu's hair. "I'm sorry.." You mumbled with a gentle smile, your grip on her hair softened and you brushed it with love. "Hehe, you bimbo/himbo!" She giggled as she looked up at you. You giggled in return. "Stay still, unless you wanna end up looking like a lion."
Yes, your life could have been called stable. But it lacked what you most desired, your deepest- most wanted desires. They weren't dark- but they were impossible. And you would spend your entire life waiting for them to be fulfilled.
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ctheathy · 1 year
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Yandere Kitsunami Headcanons
Kitsunami x Reader
Yandere Headcanons
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Author's note: Kitsunami has to be one of the, if not my favourite character of the entire Sonic franchise🌊💙 Happy I finally got to write for him!
You: Look at him, he’s the boy of my dreams!!Kit: *drowning somebody alive and giggling*
Kit/Reader [Romantic//Platonic]
[Gender-neutral Darling|Female Darling|Male Darling]
Potential ⚠️ TWs⚠️ :
Attempted drowning • Co-dependency • Delusional behaviour • Possessiveness • Stalking • Unintentional gaslighting • Guilt tripping • Abandonment issues
*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄
With the amount of attachment and connection issues he has, it honestly wouldn’t come off as a surprise at all when Kit manages to transition into a full-blown yandere. Just like how he’s dependant on Surge to make the decisions for him, he shall be dependant on you too. Just with some ... Higher measurements. He feels as if he needs you in order to breathe, in order to live. Kit would have an obsession triggered inside of him with minimum effort, a bad one for that matter; and it’s eerily easy to get him pushed to that state as well, being the more vulnerable one between both him and Surge.
I believe Kitsunami to be a fairly delusional but also possessive yandere. He truly believes himself to be best for you, including the things he’s done in your name. He absolutely despises seeing you among other mobians and it shows. He’d purposely put them in problematic situations with his water abilities, using his water tank to his advantage while practically making their life a living hell. His dislike torwards the said person blinding him from seeing the cold hard truth about who he’s become himself. He’s usually just one to observe fromout the background without interfering, but even Kit manages to have his breaking points; and it's not pretty for sure. The more resentment he grows towards the individual, the harsher and more damaging his tactics become. There would be times where he would forcefully blast boiling hot water towards the poor mobian, leaving them with a ton of burn marks to recover from. And in even worse case scenarios, attempting to drown the victim with his water strength.
Anytime you manage to spend time around another, Kit gets put in a state of panic; horrified for abandonment and clings to your side like there’s no tomorrow. You’d have to absolutely calm him down and have a long conversation with him for a good two hours or so for him to operate back onto his feet. It only becomes more difficult over time, much as he requires an amount of constant reassurance and validation for his actions that no living creature could ever provide. Even if you call him out for his deeds, he isn’t going to understand, which indicates just how much of a delusional mindset he's in. In his head, he views those around you as bad influences and threats and makes sure they pay the price for it, despite being innocent.
Though his desire to protect you and live up to your expectations is genuine, he fails to showcase this through an appropriate way. His attachment to you is unhealthy and he is just so damn desperate to make you proud, no matter the costs. He is also quite clingy to say the least. He is literally just following you around like a lost puppy and would prefer to never leave you out of his eyesight at all. Even if you set down boundaries for the sake of the healthiness of your relationship with one another, he tends to get too stressed to keep himself to them. His paranoias eating at him while it all just comes down to a stalker session. You even swore there had been times where you caught a glimpse of his glowing and recognisable magenta eyes in the corner of your room, in the middle of the night. Actually making you think you’re slowly losing your sanity to this boy.
Due to his timid nature and anxious behaviour being even worsened so after his obsession starts to take place, he most likely begins to influence his darling too. He is continuously dumping all his worries onto them and whispering paranoia’s in their ears, to the point it might even start to affect their own natural instinct. You have always been one to comfort Kit over his concerns instead of disregarding it like many others have done, but he just becomes so restless with his panic, it starts to rub off on you too. His pleads are alarming and nerve-wracking to you, but you cannot really say anything about it either. It gets to a point where you’re constantly wary of your surroundings and those around you, suspicions and fears lingering in the back of your mind which originally belonged to the teal furred fennec. At last, you might just be gaslighted into believing that he truly is the only safe space for you, being pulled into his own delusions. He’d already isolate you on a regular basis. And it honestly just gets to a point where you feel terrified of your own environment
*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄
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cultpastorkevin · 10 months
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Dependent Personality Disorder, Kevin Day, & the Edgar Allan Ravens
brought to you by an ex cult pastor w/ crippling mental issues
well let’s just jump right into it ngl (also if I miss anything or forget something give me a pass I have amnesia and a one track mind so I definitely missed stuff)
Okay so the whole Ravens always have a partner, never go anywhere alone, if one fails you both pay, etc. I’ve been thinking about this for weeks and I don’t see it broken down and discussed at length enough, so imma try to do that from a mixed personal experience & psychology perspective
The fact Jean, Neil and Kevin have all stated in books and in the extra content that not having that presence next to them was devastating (much less so for Neil okay he didn’t spend fucking years there); Nora has also talked about how Ravens are basically unable to function if left alone; you can’t send them to the store alone or leave them places or expect them to be capable of completing tasks without their other half; TSC reeks of Jean having to learn how to function without a double and it’s gonna be a trainwreck for Jeremy bc how the fuck can Jean be this old and not feel able to have a room on his own anyways—
What is Dependent Personality Disorder?
The DSM-5 refers to DPD as a pervasive and excessive need to be taken care of, which leads to submissive and clinging behavior and fears of separation. It is characterized by excessive fear and anxiety. DPD begins by early adulthood, is present in a variety of contexts, and is associated with inadequate functioning. Symptoms can include anything from extreme passivity, devastation, or helplessness when relationships end; avoidance of responsibilities; and severe submission.
According to the DSM-5, the disorder is indicated by at least five of the following factors:
has difficulty making everyday decisions without an excessive amount of advice and reassurance from others.
needs others to assume responsibility for most major areas of their life.
has difficulty expressing disagreement with others because of fear of loss of support or approval.
has difficulty initiating projects or doing things on their own (because of a lack of self-confidence in judgment or abilities rather than a lack of motivation or energy).
goes to excessive lengths to obtain nurturance and support from others, to the point of volunteering to do things that are unpleasant.
feels uncomfortable or helpless when alone because of exaggerated fears of being unable to care for themselves.
urgently seeks another relationship as a source of care and support when a close relationship ends.
is unrealistically preoccupied with fears of being left to take care of themselves.
Since I only need 5, and I don’t want to bore everyone to death, I’ll just do 5.
needs others to assume responsibility for most major areas of their life
Kevin spent well, basically his entire life having everything picked out for him by others. Exy was chosen for him. Where he lived, when he slept, what he ate and when was chosen. Riko and Tetsuji dictated his every fucking step up until he left. Kevin didn’t learn anything he wasn’t supposed to learn and therefore automatically expected others to do it for him because that’s what he was taught to do. Kevin’s only skill in life is Exy, which means he doesn’t have any other skills (well he does, he just doesn’t think they’re useful or important). Ravens are taught to be dependent on each other because without each other, they’re not whole or a person; they’re dehumanized until they begin to assign responsibility to someone they think is more equipped for it, is better for it, which is usually an authority figure (in this case, those figures are Riko and Tetsuji). Tetsuji knew exactly what he was doing by creating the psychological mindfuck of an inter-dependent group that is the Ravens. He took a bunch of young adults, gave them a god, and then helped that god beat them into numb dissociation until they couldn’t think for themselves and were even afraid to.
has difficulty expressing disagreement with others because of fear of loss of support or approval
Reminder that DPD is prevalent in people who have been excessively abused and it’s also characterized by extreme anxiety. For people like Kevin and the Ravens, expressing anything other than what Riko and Tetsuji wanted could get them killed; it wasn’t just about being terrified of disapproval or protection, it was because losing anything from the group meant you were gonna get hurt (usually badly). Jean was literally waterboarded for shits and giggles, you think Riko is gonna take someone saying no very well (Neil Josten drove him insane I can tell u that much)? Ravens have a hive mind mentality because a hive mind keeps them alive and safe. Kevin had a hive mind when he was with Riko, and I’d argue he still had the remnants of one when he was with the Foxes. Riko breaking his hand was the only thing that broke him out of it, and even then, it barely did. Kevin only started mouthing off to Riko when Neil (bless his scrungly ass) started shaking Riko’s brain like a maraca. He had someone he could depend on in those situations because, again, Ravens always do things together. Kevin wouldn’t fucking dream of shitting on Riko at Kathy’s show by himself. Kevin spent 10+ years at Evermore with his sanity hanging on the hook of a batshit adoptive brother whose approval or disapproval would dictate if he was allowed to sleep. So yeah, I’d say Kevin had a violent need to always express agreement and do everything Riko wanted whether he liked it or not because the anxiety and terror of not doing so outweighed any sense of self preservation he could have. That ties in w the next one.
goes to excessive lengths to obtain nurturance and support from others, to the point of volunteering to do things that are unpleasant
Riko utilized abuse in a lot of ways; Nora put in her extra content that he had other Ravens rape Jean; imo, those Ravens most likely didn’t fucking want to, but going to excessive lengths to stay within his approval and be safe? Yeah, they were gonna do it. Tetsuji and Riko also make the Ravens never miss practice or any other shit they want them to do, regardless of the state they’re in. Which means you’re going to practice when you’ve been raped the night before; it means you’re going to practice after getting butchered all night by your other half, etc. Anyways; when Kevin works with the Foxes, he repeatedly does the opposite and basically throws a fit if someone steps on court that isn’t in shape to. This begs the eye raiser that he didn’t want those things happening at Evermore, but he did them anyways because his need for approval and the anxiety of not doing so, outweighed the fact he hated doing it. He was so dependent on Riko and staying close that he was pretty willing to toss anyone and everyone under the bus to meet expectations even if they left a nauseating pit in his stomach. Doing unpleasant things for the person you’re attached to is hard, but their praise and approval after the actions erase all previous anxieties, which then fuels a broken cycle of seeking out that approval and continuing to engage in unpleasant actions out of fear of not recieving that pending approval afterwards. It’s hard to explain succinctly the mindfuck DPD causes your thoughts to be like when you have it.
urgently seeks another relationship as a source of care and support when a close relationship ends
Kevin lost Riko. You know what he gets next? Fucking Andrew. I don’t even know if I need to explain this one because Kevin’s dependency on Andrew is so prevalent and excruciatingly obvious throughout the whole series lmao. Kevin ain’t gonna admit it but he relies on Andrew like a starving man relies on garbage (no offense Andrew). Kevin’s duo dependency with Riko was shattered to its core and guess what idiot he latches onto to fill the void? Andrew ofc. I think out of everyone, Andrew is probably the healthiest until Neil comes along (still think it should’ve been a polycule but I digress).
Riko’s obsessiveness and possessiveness with Kevin was crippling to Kevin and left him without the ability to exist without a buffer. Andrew’s apathetic ass and explicit understanding of consent is needed to balance out Riko’s emotional instability and disregard for Kevin’s autonomy. I would go so far as to say it was dependency that forced Kevin to become more independent because Andrew wasn’t going to sit on his ass and wait for Kevin to figure it out or heal. Kevin only struggled into some form of functionality out of what I personally see as a crippling people pleasing need to be useful and that came from being dependent on those around him. He became semi functional (I use this so vaguely bc that man would not be functional in the real world) out of necessity and obligation to those around him, not because he actually healed or processed his shit.
Ignoring your own issues to meet expectations of the one(s) you’re dependent on is stereotypical avoidance and signs of people pleasing and also it’s a trauma response. Kevin quite literally just went “yeah well I have some problems but I’m going to push those aside bc nothing else matters besides Exy” and then proceeded for the entire series to use Exy, Neil, and Andrew as ways to try to avoid his trauma history. He’s kinda insane for that but also I get it, because placing your trauma lower than something else and then in turn obsessing over something or someone helps you compartmentalize and pseudo-function until you eventually snap and have a massive meltdown. Another thing is that when you’re living in an abusive environment you can’t afford those meltdowns. I like think that after all the shit happened in AFTG, Kevin just lost his shit for a period of time because it’s a very reasonable trauma response in victims for once you’re finally safe, you just shatter from all the pressure you’ve been avoiding in yourself. It’s only after you shatter that you can heal, and you can’t do that unless you’re in a space that you’re allowed to. And Tetsuji kept his Ravens in a headspace where they couldn’t.
feels uncomfortable or helpless when alone because of exaggerated fears of being unable to care for themselves
Ngl I’ve kinda already covered aspects of this but I just wanna reiterate what Nora said abt this specifically in her extra content that “Kevin is the one who warns Jeremy he (Jean) cannot go anywhere alone, “we Ravens don’t know how” and “Being able to go to class or the grocery store or the gym without any of his teammates in attendance is just—unfathomable” in regards to Jean Moreau’s transition into the Trojans. This is just kinda, explanatory. We’re talking about college age athletes who have been hazed and abused so much that the idea of going to a class alone isn’t even a concept to them; Kevin explicitly tells Jeremy that Ravens don’t know how to do things. They’re dependent on each other. Kevin is not only speaking to help Jean, but when he says “us Ravens” he’s including himself in that statement because he can’t either and he knows how hard it is to try to acclimate to suddenly being thrust into individuality when you haven’t had it in years. Unlike most of the Ravens, Kevin and Riko (and eventually Jean as well) grew up having that inter dependency made into a core personality trait. They hate each other and they love each other, their failures and wins depend on each other, one can’t breathe without the other suffering for it. At what point does trained and conditioned, and ultimately encouraged, dependent behavior turn into brainwashing and dehumanization until there’s nothing left of you but the one you’re dependent on?
Finally
I’m not saying Kevin Day or all of the Ravens have DPD; but what I am saying is that they have extreme traits at the least of it and it is entirely fucking reasonable to me that at least a few of them ended up with DPD or similar disorders because of the shit that happened to them in the Nest. People forget that trauma and adverse circumstances (especially from young ages like Kevin and Riko and Jean) can cause you to develop disorders or even mimic symptoms of disorders because those traumatic events caused reactions that are disordered behaviors. I feel if anything is to be nitpicked, it’s Kevin’s absolute bitchiness, because god he can be an asshole, and someone somewhere could argue because he has that antagonistic streak, DPD is entirely out of the question.
Unfortunately, the dichotomy exists of knowing when you can be bitchy and maintain submissiveness. Kevin probably learned where and when and to what extent he could tow that line when he lived in the Nest, whether it was taking out his anger and his anguish on other Ravens, on the court, or on the Foxes when he moved over. In my experience, my own explosive anger issues had to be portioned out, I had to know who I could do that to, be like that with. When and where was the correct time to lash out and when I was gonna get hit for it. Kevin isn’t stupid, he knew what Riko and Tetsuji were like. He also knew he had the upper hand in the power dynamic over the Raven’s on court. If he went for blood out of anger during practice, triggered by if Riko hurt him too much or took too much from him, other Ravens just had to take it, or worse, probably were encouraged to encourage the brutality.
All in all, I think Tetsuji created an absolute fucking labyrinth of a psychological warzone that both forced submission and rewarded dominance; it left lasting behavioral traits and triggered disorders that crippled Ravens, some for their entire lives. I wanna bet probably no former Raven went to therapy; the ones that got divvied up after the Nest closed probably were required to by their new teams, and they probably are the only generation that maybe were able to heal from it. In the extra content, Thea decided because Kevin could play again, “no harm no foul” on Riko’s end. If that’s not hivemind, culty, worshipper behavior, idk what is. That’s not a normal reaction, but it is a conditioned one.
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loveandleases · 7 months
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(Time for our favorite dilf's Fluff ABC. The previous ABC's can be found here and here. Below the cut~)
A = Admiration - Ardent admires when someone is responsible.
B = Body - He's a fan of the entire body, though if you wanted to know which one he would focus on in the middle of the night, would have to ask the old man.
C = Cuddling - He cuddles Cupid when she allows it. When she doesn't he gets a nice scratch as a reminder. Now with a partner Ardent loves being the big spoon, but he will deny he enjoys cuddling.
D = Dates - He doesn't have that much time to date. When he used to he would always offer to cook for his date, Ardent loves to show off his skill in the kitchen, among other places.
E = Emotions - He likes to pretend to be this big tough guy, but one unanswered call to his niece and the man is sulking for the better part of the hour. Ardent doesn't hold back his thoughts while some may say he's an angry person, in reality he just stopped trying to please other people.
F = Family - Ardent is very close to his parent's, especially his mother. He takes care of the complex just for them, not wanting to accept the payment they send his way. He has a sister, who is the mother to his very loved niece. We also can't forget Cupid.
G = Gifts - He will deny he enjoys recieving gifts, but in actuality when someone thinks enough to give him something he truly cherishes it. For Ardent, he doesn't mind to give gifts. When he gives you homemade food, that's when you know he has a soft spot for you.
H = Holding Hands - He will cling to his partners hand like his life depends on it, not wanting to get seperated. Squeeze as hard as you want, he won't let go. Though if you point out you're holding his hand, he pretends it's as a favor to you, definitely not because he likes it.
I = Injury - Ardent is very calm in a crisis, be that an accident or his sister giving birth. He is focused on the end goal. So if someone is hurt, he will basically be like a mother hen. Ensuring they get an ample amount of rest and relaxation.
J = Jokes - The guy tries he really does, when peope laugh at his "jokes", it's usually when he's serious. His jokes tend to fall flat. Every once in awhile he has a good one.
K = Kisses - Ardent kisses with hunger, full of passion. As if the last of breath in his body belongs to his partner. He can be rough more often than not, but if you're lucky enough he might just surprise you with how tender he can be.
L = Love - He loves many people, Ardent doesn't see the point of hiding emotions. It's not something his parents did and it's not something he does either. He grew up in a home where the phrase I love you was always in use. Be that from his family or friends.
M = Memory - Ardent's favorite memory is seeing his niece for the first time, well that and adopting Cupid. Remembering how small she was when he took Cupid home is one of the highlights of his life. Knowing that he could in fact be so caring for her, even though sometimes Cupid just doesn't have time for that.
N = Nightmare (what is one of their fears?) - Not being able to be a safe space for someone he cares about. He might suffer with hearing other peoples emotions, but Ardent still wants to be trusted by them. To be that shoulder they can lean on.
O = Oddity (what is one quirk they have?) - Many people don't know he's actually greek. That is until he gets angry, then he can't help but curse in his native tongue.
P = Pet Names (what do they like to call you?)- Kitten.
Q = Quality Time (how do they like to spend time with you?) - Ardent would love just hanging out, be that at home or somewhere else. Though he hates when people pay him attention, when it's with you he will deal with it. He would love to just enjoy the night in each others company, with a good book and a nice glass of wine.
R = Rhythm (what song do they hum to themselves, when they think no one is listening.)- Torn to shreds by Deff Lepard.
S = Secrets (how open are they?) - Not very, though that will change over time. But get him in front of his mom, or niece and he is like an open book. The man is putty in their hands.
T = Time (how do they spend their time?) - He spends his time quite divided, be that taking his niece to after school activities, working on things at the complex, trying to get his mother's Manicotti recipe. Ardent can be seen going in and out many times of the day. The question is for who.
U = Upset (how do they act when they're upset?) - It depends on the level of upset. He could simmer in his anger, sulk, or just let it all out.
V = Vaunt (what are they proud of? Do they like to show you off?) - His body, his cat, and his cooking. He will show it all off if given a chance. Ardent works hard to keep in good health, to love Cupid, and to be able to make a good meal.
W = Warrior (how do they feel about you fighting? Would they fight for you, beside you, etc?) - He doesn't like to admit he would fight for anyone. Instead he prefers to pretend to care less. (Such a lie). Ardent would fight for his partner, or for someone he sees is done wrong. He might be an ass, but he refuses to let people be treated as such.
X = X-Ray (how well are they able to read you?) - Ardent can read a shy person very well. Only time will tell how well he pushes MC's.
Y = Yes (how would they propose to you?) - Maybe something silly like having the ring on Cupid's collar for MC to see. Whose to say just yet.
Z = Zen (what makes them feel calm?) - Cupid laying on his chest, or rubbing his back. Just letting him feel his emotions and knowing someone is there for him can make him calm.
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derxwnakapsyla · 3 months
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Hello there! My name is Derxwna Kapsyla, and you might know me as the mastermind behind projects such as "Yitria Resurrection", "Touhouon Asteria", "Touhou Pupet Play ~ The Adventures of Ayaka", "Chronicles of the Omniverse"- Wait, you don't know that last one? Never mind it then! Today I'm here to talk about something I am extremely passionate about- map design!
It is easily my favorite aspect of game development, and I feel like I'm pretty proficient at it. So, I would like to open up map making commissions to help people out on their own projects! I've got well over 10 years of experience, getting my start back in the ancient days of Binary ROM Hacking with Advance Map being the hottest tool on the block. I like to make sure the maps I make are of the highest standards I can possibly muster, so I have a fairly sharp eye for detail.
I also love communicating ideas with people and helping them reach a desired solution (If I'm able to)! If you're interested in taking a shot on me, I welcome you to message me on here, or DM me on Discord! I look forward to getting a chance to work with you! I promise, I don't bite- I'd much rather use an Ion Cannon. Also I just lost my job recently so I could really use some supplementary income while I try and find a new job...
Things to know about Derxwna:
I've been working with game development as a hobbyist for over 10 years, with an exceptional passion for map design.
I like to make sure that anything I make is the best quality I can possibly produce.
I do have a degree (of sorts) in Game Design, Programming, and Animation.
Spent a good majority of my time playing Wind Waker just trying to compare terrain to Ocarina of Time.
You will not find a person more offended by the tile errors in vanilla Pokemon games, I guarantee it.
What I am offering:
Map design for 2D environment based games.
Map critique and feedback. (This is free!)
Eventing on a small scale.
Redesigning your own maps.
What I am not offering:
A whole game made from scratch (Unless you're paying massive $Revenue).
Complex scripting maneuvers.
Unique tilesets. If you have a unique tileset you want me to use, send it- but I will check if you are allowed to use it.
Trainer battles.
Advice on how to spend your FSA. I answer those questions enough at my previous workplace.
Examples of my work:
-- Touhoumon Asteria -- https://imgur.com/a/hsAjnuk
-- Yitria Resurrection -- https://imgur.com/a/fveRkMc
-- Adventures of Ayaka -- https://imgur.com/a/tYAV8u7
-- Other Map Creations -- https://imgur.com/a/ZzqvrdV
Prices
-- Map Size --
Small map (30x30 or smaller): $10
Medium map (60x60 or smaller): $35
Large Map (100x100 or smaller): $60
Extra Large Map (100x100 or greater): $90
I am willing to take on a multi-map endeavor. Prices will be discounted for bulk purchases. I am also willing to very slightly haggle on the tiers above Small Map, but prices will not go below $10 above the previously listed tier.
-- Eventing --
Depending on event complexity and quantity, additional fees may be incurred.
-- Additional Pricing --
Gen 4 or 5 theme: +$40. I am not comfortable mapping in this style. I can attempt it, but only if you provide a tileset of the exact tiles you want.
When it comes to payments, I am flexible with how I receive them. I understand that people are not comfortable giving an entire lump sum for commissions. If you'd like, we can work out a payment plan of sorts, or you can pay a portion up front and pay the rest upon completion. If I do not or am unable to finish the map, I will refund the amount paid up front. As a note, if you are looking for a rush order, an additional fees may be incurred.
Contact Information
The best ways to reach me if you are looking for a commission, or if you have any additional questions are as follows:
The Eevee Expo Forums
Discord: DerxwnaKapsyla
Tumblr
This is where I would put my Twitter account- if it was unsuspended.
Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/derxwnakapsyla.bsky.social
The best times to reach me are between 12 PM and 12 AM PST (GMT-7).
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findafight · 1 year
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you're so right. i will never understand the hold rockstar eddie has on ppl. his character immediately becomes insufferable if he's super famous and successful, esp in no upside down aus where he never experiences some form of ego death/being forced to reassess his own bullshit. not to mention he is just not someone who would become uber famous like he does not have the personality to either pull it off or handle it well if he miraculously did imo. steve really screams child star to me tho in an au. plus his entire character arc kind of speaks to him being able to handle fame (ie the fact that steve is a v reflective, adaptive character that was capable of actually changing and improving his behavior even w/o knowing about the upside down originally) and knowing/learning who he should be surrounding himself w. like i firmly believe steve could actually handle being famous in a way eddie could not.
I do enjoy rockstar eddie to a point? it depends I think. Rockstar/musician aus are popular in fandoms of all sorts an I like them sorta...hit or miss? haha.
But you're right that it's become...idk over saturated? And yeah absolutely Eddie's ego death and the shattering of the Munson Docterine is kind of pivotal for his character growth. Like I know the duffers don't think Eddie's problem is that he's stuck in highschool clique mode (They seem to think his flaw is that he's a coward...which is a different meta but his reactions are reasonable to the situations he's thrown in), because they only think "jocks" are the problem there, but he is. Him realizing that actually Steve is pretty cool is the stepping stone to him not hating jocks on principal, and broadening and nuancing his view of people outside his assumptions on who are "Proper" nerds. No- upside down aus, regardless of any other trope in them, often fall flat for me in that aspect, yet always make sure to remind us Steve was a bit of a stuck up dick in highschool (until the beginning of grade 11) and it's tiring to nt see Eddie allowed to be wrong and have that moment of self-betterment.
And yeah, I can maybe see eddie becoming semi-famous session musician (not a musician that is a session musician AND recording/performing artist by themself like Glen Campbell or Marvin Gaye) through a series of events like. Playing one of his hyper specific songs at a small gig, someone in desperate need of a guitarist is there and sees he is incredibly talented as a guitarist, asks him to help as a session musician in like two days, he plays, someone at the studio is like hey. wanna be on-call for us? and eddies like sure. ok. So sometimes he's on hit records but they aren't his. royalties are decent from the amount of work he's done. He's a pinch hitter guitarist, and he's good, so he gets a rep in the industry for that. He doesn't seem like the kind of person that could thrive in the high pressure, has major deadlines, environment that being a famous musician woudl be. I mean a lot of rockstars aren't either and it's not healthy for them? I can see Eddie crashing and burning, which I know a lot of fics cover but I also find it super depressing haha. He would probably be too standoffish and anti-authority and possibly refuse outside input for stuff, so he'd be off putting in the industry. not that musicians are always pleasant to work with but i think you get it.
Child star Steve would be so neat tbh. Look I love famous athlete Steve. but also the allure of him being famous young... Maybe as a little piano prodigy? (I love piano prodigy steve hehe) or an actor? like canon era he could have been a Mousketeer! Maybe he did a couple movies (what if he was in a few cult-classic scifi movies...that the party just so happen to love....but don't pay attention to the name of the child actor in...or maybe he used a stage name?) And then him fading away and living his life a little bit, before he decides to come back into the limelight?
I think that often we forget that Steve's "come-to-jesus" moment happened without the upside down. He talked shit, got hit, and then decided that he owed Jonathan (and Nancy) an apology. No one made him help clean up the grafitti! He had no idea there were monsters he just had a shit 48 hours where he went off the handle and then decided he had been an ass and to fix himself. When he was 16! He'd have made these changes to himself without the Upsidedown. Somehow the party knew his full name, and I love the hc that he won a major game/championship for Hawkins as a junior/sophomore so was a minor town celebrity. These lend to Steve being able to handle the pressure without too major a fallout or a long-term downward spiral of self destruction.
Except (okay operating as like a post-canon thing, because I love canon-divergent aus more than no-upside down aus but could still work?) now he's battle scarred and obviously not the rosy-cheeked boy he was when he was a tween. I'm thinking maybe he goes back in '89? give some time to heal from the upside down and Robin is moving for Uni, he's obviously going with her, so he figures acting would beat dead-end minimum wage jobs. Or at least spice things up in between shifts. Maybe he starts with theatre, and decides to see if there's some screen auditions he could do. Maybe he still has people in the industry who remember working with him (he's a good team player and a natural leader) and they help in slip back in. He does some bit parts, a few semi-recurring characters. Maybe he's even on an episode of Law and Order, and people go hey! That guy who's crying over his dead girlfriend (he's a red herring) is the kid from that 70's scifi movie!
Eventually someone actually offers him a role without him auditioning, and it's a bigger part, a side character but one with lines and even a semi decent arc in a b-list movie. he's a good fit. Charming and handsome, plus there are some intense scenes and on set Steve's proved himself capable of handling most things and supportive of coworkers (actors and crew alike.) Except there's a shirtless scene. While his scarring isn't extensive, it's definitely noticeable and not as easy to cover up as the faint discolouration around his neck. it's hard to explain, and usually movies want flawless skin. He tells them this. They still want him.
So he takes the role. And he has a blast on set. He loves working as a team, and even though days are long, he feels everything sort of...coming together. A feeling that this is what he wants to do. that he was right to get back into acting even though he started so young because of his parents.
He makes lasting friendships with nearly everyone he meets on the set. There's a few child actors, and he tries to give them tips and pointers, and be a role model or support for them. he knows what it's like to be little and surrounded by adults a lot of the time, and feeling pressure to be perfect. (They think he's actually the coolest, even if he's also kinda a doofus.) (there's probably a scene where he picks up on of the kids, and then the rest of them on set want piggy back rides too...)
It's considered his comeback role, despite being a few years after he actually came back. The pressures of fame come back again, but he's older now, and he's killed monsters. He has Robin beside him. A few paps don't scare him. Everything he has to hide (besides his bisexuality...and maybe his shitty relationship with his parents) is covered up by the government anyways. He gets bigger parts, and gets an even bigger rep for being a delightful (if viciously sarcastic) and supportive co-worker, especially if there's kids on set. (child stars of the nineties will look back on working with steve and think he was one of the few adults to get it. to understand how big your emotions are as a kid and how most grown ups [often even/especially their parents] didn't let them actually feel what the were feeling, instead wanting them to be acting all the time, instead of only in front of the camera. How he told them to never let anyone do anything they weren't comfortable with, no matter who it was. How he'd stick up for them, no matter what, and would ask how they were doing throughout shooting. They'll look back on being on set with Steve and remember how even if he called them little shits when they tried to prank him or were goofing off, he said it with a wink and a smile.)
I'd say, (please forgive me) he sort of becomes a (90's era) Tom Cruise kind of actor (before he went on oprah and went viral for jumping on the couch and then only did action movies after that) (also steve doesn't become the face of a cult) Like he does action flicks, but can definitely pull his weight as a dramatic actor. (I realize that I already have a movie star steve au but thats a different era I can have overlapping headcanons for the aus!!) His cute heart-shaped smile and amazing hair entrances audiences. He can make emphatic speeches about justice and also carry at least two children out of a burning building. He has range.
idk steve going from child actor to highschool athlete to monster killer to broke thespian to movie star again entices me!!!
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