#the agonies build character ❤️

[wormtime123]

I have come from ao3 to attack you with kindness about the season sevenfinity fic.I cannot figure out for the life of me how someone has made such a good fic. The way the characters act is just so realistic is amazing. It's like a hermit just left a unused script for S7 out for a moment and you were just like,'yep, that's mine now. Yoink.' Ina ll seriousness though, that series was one of the first ones I ever read and it was so good I am still hanging around today! Can't wait for chapter 7 and super glad to have seen you on my dashboard a odd month ago❤️ (also completely unbiased but mumbo needs a hug and you are going to give it to him. This is a threat)

i’ve been hit in the head with the kindness this is SO sweet omg. it’s really cool you found me and hearing this means a lot, thank you for stopping by :-) there’s a lot of chaos ahead and i’m looking forward to sharing!!

…that said though with pearl about to kill a man mumbo might have a bit of an uphill battle. for a little while. but the journey will be worth it Promise

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Mission Control 21

Warnings: non/dubcon, violence, blood, stalking, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: Captain Hydra

Summary: a man marches into your life on a mission

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

Indomitable. Of the man words you would use to describe the soldier. So it is that there is no resistance left in you. 

The buzz of your struggle for your very life slakes away and you’re left depleted. As if to balance the scales, he helps you wash away the blood. You maneuver around your foot in an effort to keep the bandage and wounds dry. By the end, you can barely hold your head up. 

He carries you to the couch. His avoidance of the bedroom is noted. Your mind tiptoes back inside, the gruesome sight etched into your brain.  

He covers you in a blanket before he builds a new fire. The crackles eases you. You wallow as you are, body ensnared in a shell of agony and shock. Your eyes close without meaning to. 

His shadow moves around you in the din of subconscious. The black tides ebb and flow, swirling in your head, lifting you into the flicker of the room and plunging you back down. His footsteps pace through the distortion of your fatigue. 

The fires snapping and cracking stays constant. Then there’s something else. Thumping, scraping, sounds that blend together into a grating drone. 

You wake to a pang that throttle your voice in your throat. You lurch and try to pull your foot away from the snare. The soldier clamps onto your ankle and keeps your feet in his lap. He rewraps your foot and calf in a fresh length of bandage. 

You whimper and whine as he secures it. He hushes you through his teeth. He trails his hand up your leg and rests it on your knee. He looks at you as you fall back and pant. 

Fuck. The pain never quite went away but its more unbearable than ever. Your body will never be the same again. It will never be yours. 

You pull your feet off his lap, a strangled grunt forcing its way from your throat. You turn onto your side to face the back of the couch in an effort to hide your grief. Hours ago, maybe longer, you were happy to be alive. Now you’re back to dreading your existence. 

The couch shifts with his weight. He stands on the groaning floor and his shadow ripples in the glare of the fire. He touches your back, nudging you, and brushes his hand down to your hip. He clutches you as he angles himself down behind you. 

You don’t move. You let him move you. He crowds you into the couch as he lays himself flush to you. He hooks his arm around your middle and nestles in under the blanket. His warmth, despite his unwelcome, is a comfort. More than the pain, you loath the cold. 

He tickles along your stomach. You shiver. The heat of his body clouds around you as his fingertips explore your body. You have nothing to hide beneath but the blanket and he’s invaded that.  

He fondles your chest. There’s a curiosity in his touch that keeps you from fighting. That and what you know for sure. It’s all futile. All of it. You may have fought for your life but without him, it was a losing battle. He holds your life in his hand just as he holds you. 

His thumb rolls around your nipple as he feels it harden. He flicks it, circles it, pressing against it. His touch grows firmer as goosebumps graze your skin. 

His fiery breath plumes into your hair and his hand crawls back down your stomach. He flutters over the soft flesh of your stomach, lingering on the cushion there. It’s not so much as it was only weeks ago. As his hand drifts lower, you tremble. 

He traces the lines of your pelvis and pets the curly tufts of hair. He combs through the wiry strands and twirls them around his fingertips. His breath grows jagged. He grunts as he presses against you. 

You close your eyes. He pets you until your flesh is hot. He slides his fingers down and prods until your part your thighs. You murmur as he curls his fingers and slips between your folds. You bite your lip as he presses against your clit roughly. 

You wince at he pushes hard, rubbing you until the friction scalds. You close your legs against him and reach to stop his hand. To your surprise, he stops. He tenses. You won’t make him stop, but you can’t let him hurt you anymore.” 

“Softer,” you whisper, “nicer.” 

Your turn your hand to stretch over his large one and extend your fingers along his. You guide his fingertips and rock his hand gently. You lift your leg again and arch into him. You might not want it or have asked for it but the thought of release is the only relief you can imagine. 

He moves to your whim. You feel his muscles relax as he gives over control to you. Your body responds despite being whittled away in the shadow of the last days. You slicken against his touch. 

“Like that,” your hand falls away. 

He keeps the slow, steady motion. You sigh. You give in entirely as he keeps going. Your nerves tie around his fingertips and a cluster thrums in your core. You sink against him and hum. You focus on the climax, letting the rest of this twisted world drift away. 

[miabebe]

Hi,

Okay, so, this is just random but I've been obsessing over jihoon recently, been losing my mind and desperately trying to look for fics admiring the man that he is but I can't find many, and so I'm genuinely really excited for your where you're convenient jihoon fic and also more jihoon scenes in camp seventeen because, I need to simp over my man. Also, please let me know if you know any good fics that would drive me crazy for jihoon, and well, just worship him. I love that man.

Also, I totally agree with tumblr user todayiscloudyday when they said that the houses were so well described. The character descriptions were literally so good that I read both the prologue and the character descriptions multiple times before the 1st chapter came out. The houses, their companions, the symbols, their jobs, I have to say, you've really done such an amazing job with them.

Anyway, I just came around to rant about my woozi brainrot and also to let you know that I am genuinely excited for your upcoming fics. I also want to let you know that you don't always have to answer my asks (considering you probably receive many and could be busy), I just send them in so you know that I appreciate your works.

MY FRIEND I UNDERSTAND

Especially after lollapalooza him in that denim on denim fit with nothing under like??? That was insanity, it had me thinking about him for days T.T

As for where you're convenient for Jihoon ahhh that's not on my to do list any time soon unfortunately - I have so much to cover for camp seventeen and reverse tropes and also my Changkyun mafia series, its sadly a little low on my priority list :( But camp seventeen Jihoon hmm you might be able to see a little of him in chapter 2 hehe

Thank you my love, I really did pour a lot of thought into those so I'm glad you've been enjoying them! And it's absolutely fine, I do love to receive and answer any and all asks you send, please never worry about that! I'm always so happy to have you around ❤️

As far as the Jihoon fics are concerned, I've not actually been reading much since I stared writing more often, but I will drop links to some of the ones that were memorable to me under the cut!

@cheolism - Oh, Agony! - I've told Jupiter this too, she's insane for this cause never had I thought I would read smut to Oedipus Rex??? I love it, the build up in this is real good

@hoshifighting - This fic by Lyla goddammit, she's so amazing with her work, I loveee this one for Jihoon, the development of what they share is *chefs kiss*

@onlymingyus - I want to write you a song - Mars is such an exceptional writer, this is truly one of her finest - I need everyone to go to her inbox and leave her the nicest words asap!

@the-boy-meets-evil - A new home for the holidays - This is one of Jess's sweetest stories, the progression is soooo nice! and I'm a bit of a sucker for holiday romance hehe

@eomayas - never lose me - If you want some good ol' pwp I really like this one by Kay! They're so lovesick, ugh it's so good T.T

[thewandererh]

💜💙❤️finally designing some jashlings for myself…after a full year of knowing chonny…

⚠️TW // GOREY CONCEPTS, BLOOD, NOOSE/RED ROPE IMAGERY, DESCRIPTIONS OF AGONY

i have pages of designs for the three that i doodled in my school sketchbook, and honestly i can’t pick one so i’m using ✨all of them✨. switching em out yknow?? maybe i accidentally created a bunch of aus instead of characters(??) because they all have loops that happen in different ways, or maybe they *are* the same but in different loops—the chonny paradox. anyways uhm some fellas to mention: nerd mind, merve (<3), deltarune soul, roe, toy-style soul, tadc mind (half an accident), a rabid heart, simon mind, an awesome enby soul…heart with heart-eye glasses but then disruptivevoid reblogged someone’s cute render of the same idea— (honestly, lmao)

the gangs all here !!

but anyways I want to show off one design of soul in particular that has become an extremely fast favorite between me and my fellow rain-jash friend Sluggx!! it’s kinda gorey so i don’t know how to censor it :[, but the image is small so scroll past if the warnings above irk you. but uh. say hi to Dyadracide—a word i coined that means “to kill the duo”

me and my friend sluggx are going FERAL for him,,

ft roe and corona 🔱👑☀️

had the idea of designing a buttload of minds a bit ago, then recently this week i decided the same for soul. doodled him at school, then showed him to my friend via whiteboardfox :]. i draw Dyadra semi different now than there, but all his design is the same. rope neck that coils up inside his body when not in use, oversized pointy teeth (went monochromatik style with human teeth originally but nah), frizzly uhkempt hair, and a trident through his head. he’s always bleeding from the roof of his mouth, whether the trident is retracted into his skull or not. i love him so much😭💛. he has a full body and even a cute little gut but that’s kept for later for now. consider this a teaser of my inner workings :monk_devious:

ive been drawing him *SOOo* muchhh aaugha…can’t wait to show you when i can :]. building a batch of art for a tumblr post that i’ll dump later today maybe. get ready for some fun and gore galore~ (its not too gorey, just the trident-through-head-hes-always-choking-on-his-own-blood concept in full force. yummy ideas have to be explored huhu)

and off i go to have a late brunch. i always write these when i have something else to do lmao. *bites into omelette*

[impossiblesuitcase]

I just wanted to say that I absolutely love your Lunar Chronicles fics! The world-building and effort you put into them are truly incredible, and you capture the characters and their essence so perfectly. Thank you for everything you do for the fandom! ❤️❤️

I was wondering—do you associate any songs with the Rampion crew? I'd love to hear your thoughts! I have a long playlist and would love to add more to it. 😈

Also, do you have any Kaider or just TLC fics in general coming out soon?😔

Aww thank you so much! I put a lot of thought into my world-building and this is one of the only times someone has mentioned it, so thank you for noticing 🥺 I'm glad all my work is going to people who are enjoying it.

I've talked before about my tlc song recommendations, so I'll just give a few: Water Under the Bridge by Adele and Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow? by Carol King (Taylor's cover is also excellent) for Cresswell. Cloud 9 by Beach Bunny, Ending Scene by IU, (when Cinder is thinking about how she's going to see Kai marry someone else and forget about her) Speak Now, Come back...be here and Love Story by Taylor Swift for Kaider.

In general I also love Agony from Into the Woods. Imagining Kai and Thorne singing that brings me so much joy 😆

And yes, I always have fics in the works. I am working on a tlc fic for a rarely featured ship which I'll post sometime in the coming months, and I also have a kaider multichapter fic still under construction. I have a handful of other drafts I'll get to after working on these main two. So if it seems like I'm radio silent, I'm just busy writing when I can squeeze in the time amidst my busy routine.

[youre-ackermine]

Hello Val and congratulations for 300 followers 🥳💕

Love your blog lovely Val!!! I know you're into levihan BUT for the event can I request some pikuhan NSFW? If you don't mind of course! 🙏

Modern Actor AU behind the scenes where they're both actresses would be great OR Journalist Pieck interviewing AOT Actress Hanji. Whatever your choice things heat up between them 😏 You can listen to Alyson Stoner's "Fool" and Baum's "Hot Water" for inspo 💕

Feel free to ignore this request if that makes you uncomfortable (it'd make me sad though but I understand if it's not your cup of tea😢)

TYSM 💕💕

Hey lovely anon ✨

I'm glad you like my blog!

Thank you so much for sending me this request. Writing a Pikuhan drabble was a challenge but I didn't want to make you sad so here it is! I hope you'll like it ✨

Thanks for my beta/proof reader Terra @dont-f-with-moogles for her help ❤️

Also tagging @smol-lydia 🫶

**********

English is not my usual language

**********

Behind the Scenes

Characters: Hange Zoe / Pieck Finger / Levi Ackerman / Armin Arlert

Pairing: Pikuhan / Levihan

Wordcount: 2100 approx.

Modern setting / Actor AU / Non-binary Hange / Fake dating / Secret relationship

Warnings: NSFW+18 - MDNI / Swearwords

Cheeks blushing hot, Armin was looking out the window on purpose as he tried to ignore the lewd sounds invading the limo. His knuckles turned white from how hard he held his glass and his leg wouldn't stop bouncing from nervousness.

"Tch… Go get a room for fuck's sake! You're embarrassing the kiddo!" Levi rolled his eyes.

The couple pulled away from each other for a second, briefly catching their breaths before diving into their passionate kiss again.

Levi emptied his own flute of expensive, delicious champagne, clicking his tongue appreciatively. Not even minding to hide the smirk on his face, he noticed how Pieck's eyelids slowly fluttered shut, her whole expression uttering bliss as Hange kissed her.

He couldn't blame her. He knew this feeling. He remembered it. He remembered how it felt to taste Hange's lips, he remembered how his skin shivered under their feathery touch. His smile grew wider at the pleasant memory but, before any of them could catch him staring, he decided to look away and focus on adjusting his cufflinks.

The make out session on display seemed never to end, adding embarrassment to the anxiety already building up in Armin's chest before the premiere, making him sweat in agony.

Levi patted Armin's shoulder with affection, drawing a faint smile from him. The young man turned to face him, slightly less flushed than a couple moments before, and straightened his back to regain composure.

"Oi, lovebirds! We'll be there in a few minutes. We can't afford to get out of the limo so fucking disheveled, do we? So get your shit together and wipe the spit out of your faces, you're literally glistening!" Levi blurted out after a brief glance at his watch.

The lovers reluctantly parted, already longing for each other. Pieck quickly pulled out a fancy compact mirror and some lipstick from her velvet purse to touch up her makeup.

Hange turned to Levi with a beaming grin unfortunately stained by the intense kiss. Levi leaned over to them, pulling out a clean handkerchief out of nowhere and rubbing the purple lipstick off their face and lips.

"Look at your sorry ass, idiot!" he uttered in a soft voice, kneeling in front of them, his hands now tangled in Hange's messy locks in an attempt to make them look less tousled.

Hange chuckled and he smiled fondly.

"What is it, Four-Eyes?"

"We owe you big time, Shorty," they said, tenderly brushing their palm on his cheek. "Sorry to put you in such an awkward position but we can't do otherwise for now, you know." Their eyes shone with endearment as they added "thank you so so much, you're so kind Levi!"

He averted his gaze, embarrassed as always when they showed him their deep, genuine affection. He took their hand in his, placed a quick peck on their wrist and exhaled deeply to get rid of the accumulating stress. The limo finally stopped and the car door clicked. Pieck blew a kiss to Hange who mouthed "I love you" in response.

"Let's do this!" Levi exclaimed as he stepped out on the red carpet, gently dragging Hange behind him. The flashes dazzled them but their faces wore a radiant smile as Levi pulled Hange into him by their waist, both looking left and right to allow the crowd to take proper pictures of their idols. 

Holding hands, they glamorously reached and climbed the stairs, stopping at the top with Pieck and Armin to wave one last time. They finally entered the luxurious hotel.

The worst part was over.

The 'Paradis/Marley Alliance' actors shared a large round table almost deserted by now. Half the cast was on the dancefloor, twirling under the huge crystal chandeliers. 

The meal had been delicious, taken in good company and they were actually sitting side by side. Pieck couldn't be happier than in this very moment as Hange discreetly held her hand in theirs under the table and their shoulders brushed ever so slightly. She didn't dare look at her lover's handsome face but she could breathe in their earthy scent, a scent that never failed to make her blush with desire.

All of a sudden, Hange's hand slipped out of her grasp as Levi helped them get up from their chair. The music was so loud they had to lean down to whisper in her ear.

"Levi and I are going to dance for a while. Showing off as usual, of course." They winked at her and left a light peck on her earlobe, raising goosebumps on her skin. "Meet me in fifteen minutes in the library down the hall, Gorgeous."

They clung to their so-called boyfriend's arm and left with a light chuckle. Pieck's gaze followed the couple on their way to the dancefloor. They looked so good together, dancing gracefully, almost sensually. No wonder everybody thought they were still dating.

She couldn't help letting out a gasp as she realized Hange had a type. Levi and Pieck didn't look so different physically but there was a huge difference though: he was their best friend and she was the love of their life.

Levi had been nothing but the most amazing friend, helping them hide their relationship. They were lucky enough that the brief romance between Hange and him never broke their strong friendship and made the whole fake dating performance believable. They couldn't afford to be uncovered, at least not while most of the new Attack on Titan's promotion revolved around the famous and glamorous 'LeviHan' couple as it had been for several years now.

Exhausted by a week of interviews and photoshoots, Pieck dozed off a bit as she let her thoughts wander for a while. Until the boisterous yet gorgeous laughter she could recognize anywhere snapped her out of her daydream.

She held her breath and her heart skipped a beat as soon as her eyes opened again and spotted Hange's slim figure, head thrown back as they chortled in Levi's arms probably at yet another poop joke of his.

The loud pounding in her chest echoed through her whole body when she took in the enchanting sight. Their black satin suit hugged Hange's thin curves perfectly, highlighting their endless legs, their elegant shoulders and their firm ass. Their jacket barely covered the sun-kissed skin showing off in the absence of a shirt.

Her face felt hot all of a sudden, and her hands started to sweat as she watched the way Levi pulled Hange flush against his chest, the way his hand lingered on the small of their back then slipped surreptitiously down to their ass. She wished she could do this herself, in front of everyone. She swallowed around the lump in her throat, nervously licking her lips and closed her eyes for a second. She resolved to head her way to the library to end the torture.

Silence was most welcome as she entered the cool room. The dim light of a few table lamps provided an intimate atmosphere to the library, something cozy also brought by the large leather sofas arranged in front of the fireplace. She let out a weary sigh and crossed a few steps to a bookshelf, looking for something to read while waiting. Her choice fell on a collection of love poems that she started to read right away, not even bothering to sit down.

She was so engrossed in her reading that neither did she hear the door slowly opening nor the light footsteps approaching behind her.

"I'm finally here, Gorgeous."

Pieck flinched when Hange's deep voice whispered in her ear as they wrapped their arms around her waist, pressing against her back, and kept her in a warm embrace. She closed her eyes and leaned back on their chest with a sigh.

"I missed you so much, Love," she whined, "I hate it when I must hide while Levi is caressing your ass in public… It's not fair! It's mine, not his!"

Her lips tentatively curled in a cute pout but she knew there was no point in complaining. Well, she just couldn't help it. It made her feel better.

Something else never failed to make Pieck feel better and it was as if Hange could read her mind. As they delicately brushed a strand of hair off her neck, she tilted her head for them to kiss the sensitive spot below her ear. Her soft skin shivered under the light touch of their lips.

"You're right, Gorgeous, I'm all yours," they replied in a low, sultry voice that sent a shiver down her spine.

Hange's hands wandered over her purple dress, slightly stroking her toned belly up to her chest as they kissed their way down her neck. Pieck managed to bite back a moan at how their warm breath and soft pecks felt deliciously tickling on her skin.

But seconds later she couldn't help but whimper when they sneaked a hand under the velvety fabric, cupping one of her breasts, grazing their thumb over the perky nipple. Pieck felt heat pooling down her belly and turned around, a light shade of pink flecking her cheeks.

Pressing her chest against Hange's, she opened her eyes and wrapped her arms around their neck to make them lean down. They gazed at each other, Pieck marveling at her lover's handsome features before her lips ghosted over theirs for a brief moment. She let her delicate fingers run through their brown hair as they tenderly stroked her back. Then, finally, their lips joined in a soft, gentle kiss.

Oh. It definitely felt like heaven. She relished in the slow motion of their mouth against hers, closing her eyes at the overwhelming sensation of warmth blooming in her chest, letting her whole body surrender to the intoxicating touch. 

Her mind went dizzy when Hange licked along her lower lip and nibbled at it, eliciting a low moan from her. She parted her lips and their tongue gently slipped into the welcoming wetness of her mouth and their hot breaths mingled as they deepened the kiss. This was nothing but pure bliss.

They made out more passionately and Hange's hands traveled down her body, prickling goosebumps all over her skin, leaving her weak in the knees.

Without breaking the kiss, they both took a few slow steps to reach a couch until she bumped into its edge. Pieck lay down on the cushions and Hange drew back just enough to take in the stunning view beneath them.

"Perfect! You're so perfect!" they uttered in a breath, their pupils black with want still raking over her body.

Pieck blushed but held their gaze. She licked her lips, breath still uneven heaving her chest, butterflies fluttering in her stomach.

Hange hovered over her, covering her face with wet, soft pecks. They kissed along her jawline while they caressed her over the fabric down to her thighs, one hand finally sliding its way through the slit of her dress. Her eyelids flickered and she breathed heavily under the sensual contact, her heart pounding faster in anticipation.

Pieck yearned for more of their touch. Unable to bear the wait any longer, she weaved her hands behind their head to draw them closer and captured their mouth in a heated kiss, pressing her body tightly against theirs.

Pieck trembled as their palm brushed the soft, silky skin of her thigh, her loud moans vibrating into both their throats when their fingers finally rubbed the wet patch on her lace underwear.

A sudden knock at the door snapped them out of their blissful haze. They lingered in their dazed reverie for a few confused seconds before another knock, sharper this time, definitely broke the spell.

"Oi, Four-Eyes! The fuck are you doing? No time for your pussy-licking shit or whatever!" Levi's voice was muffled from the other side of the door.

"Always so romantic and sophisticated, Shorty!"

Hange let out a heavy sigh, frowning their brows in annoyance.

"Five more minutes, Levi darling! Please!" they yelled.

"Fucking hell, no! Some bastard noticed we're not dancing anymore and shit's going to happen soon if you don't drag your sorry ass in here, Hange! We're supposed to go upstairs in "our" room to fake shag, remember?"

"Shit! You're right, Shorty!" they ranted before getting up, tugging at their crumpled suit.

Pieck rolled her eyes and puffed with exasperation.

"Ok, Gorgeous! Meet you in your room in ten?" they asked.

Hange didn't even wait for her answer. They kissed her lips with a smile and joined Levi in the hallway.

Mood board: @youre-ackermine

Glitter divider: @firefly-graphics

Yellow divider: @saradika

[your-divine-ribs]

How they’d react to a pregnancy scare…

Words: 4.1k

Red Van, Devil Next Door Van, Prof Van, Prof Bond, Ice Cold Van, Dad Van // I might come back and add my other characters to this later x

Character Headcanons Main Masterlist

Red

❤️ Since you started fooling around with Van you've not been intimate with Larry at all. The guilt's been eating away at you and you know you really need to call things off.

❤️ It's just that calling things off with Larry also means walking away from Van... and you've not found the strength to take that step yet.

❤️ You know it's cowardly but you've been waiting to find the right moment... but now you're really in trouble... you're 6 days late for your period and you're never late.

❤️ Larry and Van have gone out and you're sitting at the breakfast bar in the kitchen clutching a pregnancy test kit strip, trying to build up the courage to take the test.

❤️ Your thoughts go to what you were doing on this very tabletop three weeks ago, how Van had hitched up your dress and fucked you hard and needy and fast in a fit of passion whilst Larry had been upstairs taking a shower.

❤️ The fact that you'd wanted to prolong the delicious moment so much that you'd begged him to come inside you, relishing the feeling of closeness when you'd felt his release filling you up, warm and wet and deep.

❤️ You'd been stupid... weak... and all because of him.

❤️ Just go and piss on the damn test Y/N! You chastise yourself. It's not going to change the outcome. If your life's screwed you may as well know about it... it's no use prolonging the agony.

❤️ You're just about to make a move when you hear the front door slam shut and you're on your feet in an instant, panicking, heading straight for the downstairs bathroom and sliding the lock across the door.

❤️ You're expecting to hear Larry calling out to you but then you hear the unmistakeable sound of Van clattering around in the kitchen, singing to himself whilst he fixes a cuppa. Your heart sinks... you can't hide in here all morning... but maybe a little longer...

❤️ "Y/N?" His voice comes sudden and loud, closer than you were expecting. He's right outside the door. "Y/N? Where are ya? Ya in there?" A loud rap that makes you jump.

❤️ "Just a second!" You call, flustered, quickly wrapping the test in toilet paper and depositing it in the bin, making a mental note to come back later to retrieve it.

❤️ Van's waiting for you when you come out, one arm propped on the door-frame, the other outstretched to you with the empty pregnancy test box in his flattened palm. Fuck...

❤️ His eyes are wild, his mouth a hard line. "What the fuck? Why didn't ya say something?"

❤️ You feel faint, your legs buckling but Van darts forward to catch you, guiding you over to a seat whilst he hovers over you, catching your jaw and tilting your face up to his. "What's going on babe? Talk to me. Please don't shut me out." He looks scared, thumb stroking your cheek.

❤️ A sob wells up which you can't contain, bursting into the space between you, tears blurring your vision. "I don't know but I think I might be pregnant... I'm late... 6 days. What am I gonna do Van? What are we gonna do if I am?"

❤️ "Shit!" He blurts, eyes wide with disbelief. His touch falls away and he steps back, both hands in his hair, pushing it back as he hisses out curses.

❤️ Your heart feels like it's shattering into a million pieces, raw emotion clawing up your throat as you try but fail to maintain your composure. You hang your head, letting the tears flow freely, your body wracked with shudders until you feel Van's hands curl around your shoulders as he pulls you into his chest.

❤️ "Please don't cry love," he whispers into your hair, scattering kisses all along your parting, one hand smoothing gentle caresses down your back. "I'm just in shock is all... I never would 'ave thought... fuck... a baby... Why didn't you say something? Why didn't you come to me? You must've been going out of your mind with worry."

❤️ "Yeah I have," you sob, pressing yourself into the comforting warmth of his chest. "But I didn't know what you'd say. I thought you'd be pissed off. I thought it'd be better if I just dealt with it by myself."

❤️ "Oh Y/N," he sighs, holding you to him tighter, stroking your hair as he rocks you gently. "You mean the world to me darlin', you really do. Of course I'm not pissed off. Shocked? Yeah. Scared? Yeah, a little, but I don't want ya to feel like you gotta hide anything from me. Now let's get this test done, eh? We might be worrying about nothing."

❤️ Despite his initial reaction he's calm and composed with his reassuring words and tender touches. He makes you both a steaming hot cup of tea to calm your nerves as you both sit there holding hands, waiting for the results.

❤️ You're terrified of what a positive test will mean for you, but Van is resolute that he'll stick by your side no matter what. He tells you that regardless of the outcome what happens is your choice and he'll support you in whatever you decide.

❤️ Even though you're distraught you think you've just fallen in love with him a little deeper.

The Devil Next Door

❤️‍🔥 You're not sure what had come over you at the party or why you'd done what you'd done, but you couldn't go back and change it... and now you had to face the consequences.

❤️‍🔥 There'd been no romance in it, it had simply been a drunken fumble in the bathroom after a heated row that had led to you getting railed over the bathroom sink - a clothes half on, hard and fast fuck that had left you both panting and breathless... and you'd walked straight out afterwards without giving Van a backwards glance.

❤️‍🔥 In hindsight, it really wasn't one of your finer moments, and now you were faced with the very real possibility that your ten minutes of bad judgement might have serious life-long consequences... you were 5 days late for your period and you'd already thrown up twice at work. It definitely wasn't a stomach bug.

❤️‍🔥 You've been avoiding Van ever since, but you know you have to face him. Much as he winds you up he deserves to know and besides, you're not carrying around all this stress on your own.

❤️‍🔥 You can tell he's pleased to see you when you appear at his door even though he tries to hide it with a sarcy remark. You soon wipe the smirk off his face though when you tell him you need to talk and that your period's late.

❤️‍🔥 "Christ Y/N... how the fuck did that happen?" He gapes, in a state of shock as you push through into his hallway.

❤️‍🔥 "Well, when a man sticks his dick in a..." you begin, but Van cuts you off. "Okay, okay, no need to be like that! It all happened so quick... I just didn't think..."

❤️‍🔥 "Yeah well, neither did I," you blurt, and then the emotion you're trying so hard to suppress bursts forth.

❤️‍🔥 You spend twenty minutes wailing about how your life's over and how you're not ready to have a baby whilst Van holds you tightly and shushes you gently until the last of the huge wracking sobs have subsided.

❤️‍🔥 You pull away mascara-streaked and snotty-nosed to find Van looking down on you with so much concern and tenderness in his eyes. He looks terrified too but you're both scared. Neither of you are ready for this. You don't even like each other most of the time... or so you tell yourselves.

❤️‍🔥 All in all Van does an admirable job of holding it together for you. He guides you through to his living room and makes you tea, fussing around you and bringing you tissues and plumping up the sofa cushions to make sure that you're comfortable.

❤️‍🔥 When he's sure you've calmed down sufficiently he hot-foots it to the local pharmacy in record time, returning with a whole carrier bag full of pregnancy test kits which he upends over the coffee table. "Well... I didn't know which one to get did I? It's a bloody minefield!"

❤️‍🔥 You're struggling to pee on the test strip you're so wound up with nerves, and Van hovers around outside, telling you through the toilet door that he'll do everything he can to support you and he wouldn't dream of letting you down.

❤️‍🔥 When you finally emerge having succeeded in peeing on the stick you're surprised to see his eyes red-rimmed and glassy and you watch him wiping away a stray tear.

❤️‍🔥 "Look at the state of me," he sniffs. "I'm sorry for getting so emotional... it's just that for as long as I can remember I've had this dream about becoming a dad."

❤️‍🔥 That just sets you off again and you're both sniffling in each other's arms whilst you wait for the test, somehow knowing that no matter what happens you'll both get through this... together... the unlikeliest of partnerships.

Forbidden - Prof Van

🖤 You're absolutely terrified when you realise that your period is late. You've skipped your lectures all week and spent the last four days holed up in your room. All your housemates are worried about you but you refuse to come out.

🖤 You're not sure whether you're sick with worry or it's morning sickness but you feel terrible. You've checked your dates a million times over and there's no denying it, if you are really pregnant it's definitely Van's.

🖤 You toyed with the idea of telling him but quickly discarded it. He's engaged. He's your lecturer. You're nothing but a plaything to him. There's absolutely no chance he'd be supportive... particularly as you've already decided that you're going to keep the baby. Telling him isn't an option.

🖤 Even though your life feels like it's falling apart you try to keep a level head and the best way to do that is to make a plan. You'll drop out of Uni and get a job to get a bit of money behind you. You'll manage on your own two feet... you'll go it alone... you and the baby.

🖤 But first thing's first. You might be completely over-reacting. You've not even done a pregnancy test yet.

🖤 So on the fifth period-less day you bolster yourself up, slipping out of halls when everyone's at lectures, making your way across campus furtively like you're a criminal evading capture. It's a miserable day to match your mood and the rain's lashing down relentlessly.

🖤 You've got your head down against the driving rain as you exit the pharmacy so you don't notice the tall figure crossing your path until it's too late and you've collided with them, the pregnancy test you've just purchased flying from your grasp and falling at your feet.

🖤 You fire out a string of curses as you quickly stoop down to pick it up but the person you bumped into beats you to it. You feel like your heart's going to explode clean out of your chest as you straighten up to realise that the person holding the box out to you just happens to be Van.

🖤 Your eyes meet in a startling moment of realisation and time seems to freeze momentarily until Van breaks the silence. "Y/N... I think we need to talk... don't you?"

🖤 You follow him back across campus to his office, engulfed in an air of tense silence, and when you get there he ushers you quickly inside, locking the door behind you.

🖤 Secret meetings in his office behind locked doors are a regular occurrence but the mood's certainly different today. Usually you're bent roughly over the desk or pressed up against the wall but for once there's no heat in Van's gaze, only concern as he guides you to a seat, drawing up a chair next to you.

🖤 "I've been so worried about you, you've not turned up to my classes all week or answered any of my emails. I thought you were sick or something bad had happened... and then I find out like this..."

🖤 He sounds overwhelmed and emotional and more than a little hurt which shocks you to your core. "When were you going to tell me? Were you even going to tell me?"

🖤 "I'm sorry... I was just scared, well, bloody terrified actually. I didn't know how you'd react." You can't keep your eyes on him, dropping your gaze to the floor. "And I don't even know for sure yet... that's why I got the test."

🖤 "And if you are... is it mine?" He asks plainly and you mumble out a 'yes', not even lifting your head, your anxiety increasing as the silent moments seem to tick by, drawing out the agony.

🖤 Finally you look up at him and you're taken aback by the emotion etched on his face. He looks shell-shocked but there's warmth there too, so much warmth simmering in his eyes that your heart aches with it.

🖤 You're still scared though, unsure. "Don't worry... I don't expect anything from you. I know how these things work. I wont cause you any trouble, I've figured things out. I'll be okay on my own."

🖤 You thought he'd be angry and dismissive, telling you to "get rid of it" or denying that it could be his, but there's none of that. He's the softest you've ever seen him as he sits forward in his seat, taking your hands in his and holding them tight, fingers entwined.

🖤 "I never want to hear you say you're on your own again Y/N... we're in this together now. You and me... okay? No matter what happens. I'm here for you..."

Forbidden - Prof Bond

🧡 The first wave of sickness hits when you're in a lecture... thankfully not Van's... and you bolt up out of your seat, dashing down the corridor to the toilets as fast as your legs can carry you, only just making it there on time.

🧡 You bring up the entire contents of your stomach in retch after stomach-churning retch before you're slumping down on to the cold tiles, bewildered as to what's brought this on.

🧡 If you'd been partying hard at the Student Union bar last night you could understand it but you'd stayed in and gone to bed early, feeling unusually groggy and tired. Maybe you've eaten something that didn't agree with you... that must be it.

🧡 You're just splashing your face with cold water when it hits you and you look up to find your terrified reflection staring back at you. You can't be. No way. There's no way you could be pregnant, you're on the pill... but then you're not the most reliable at taking them. FUCK!

🧡 Panic starts to cascade through you in waves and your knees feel weak, your head spinning as you recall the steamy hook-up you'd had with Johnny just the previous week in the front seat of his car.

🧡 You're in a daze as you emerge back into the corridor, so preoccupied with your troubled thoughts that you don't notice Johnny until he's there at your side, asking you if you're okay with obvious concern.

🧡 You're so choked up the words don't come, you just shake your head weakly, letting Johnny guide you back down the corridor to his office where he takes a seat next to you on the sofa, a reassuring arm around your shoulder as he smiles warmly. "Whatever's the matter? Are you ill? Or are you just hungover again?"

🧡 But his smile dies swiftly when he sees the tears brimming in your eyes, the way that you shake your head to tell him, that no... you're not sick... it's something else. "I think... I... I might... I might be... pregnant... and if I am... it's... its... yours."

🧡 He freezes at the last word, the expression on his face cycling from shock to disbelief to fear to regret and back again, over and over, none of them positive emotions, but you're sure this just mirrors your own reactions. You feel wretched, burying your face in your hands.

🧡 There's quiet for a moment but then you feel the arm around your shoulder squeezing gently, a hand slotting under your jaw and tipping your face upwards to him. "Y/N... Y/N..." he's saying softly. "Look at me love... yeah that's right, c'mon, don't hide away."

🧡 You can see that he's in turmoil inside but he's trying his hardest not to show it, worries about fathering a child with a student pushed aside so he can assuage your own fears and be strong for you. "Let's just take this one step at a time, okay? Have you done a test? Do you know for sure?"

🧡 "No... I don't know, I just got sick and then I thought back to last week... when we were in your car." Your breathing's getting shallow, your throat closed up, your vision fuzzy at the edges just like when you have an anxiety attack. "Ahhh... I don't feel so good," you whine.

🧡 You see Johnny's shoulders sag slightly, his features soften. He cups your face in his hands, speaking gently but firmly. "C'mon love... you need to calm down, there's no use getting all worked up and making yerself ill. Just breathe for me okay? That's it.... deep breath in through your nose... 1, 2, 3..."

🧡 He counts slowly and deliberately, his calming voice and aura washing over you as you do as instructed and breathe in and out slow and deep, the sharp edge of your anxiety dulling enough for you to focus as he pulls you back from the brink of your downward spiral.

🧡 "Right... let's not get ourselves in a panic before we know for sure what we're dealing with, eh? First things first, we'll get you a test... and if you are pregnant then we'll deal with it, whatever you decide. I'm not gonna leave ya alone, I'm gonna take care of ya, okay?"

🧡 You're still stressed but there's just something reassuring about Johnny. You know that no matter what happens and no matter how he feels he'll take care of you just like he says. You can trust him completely.

Ice Cold

💙 You've been trying to be careful, but more often than not you're reckless in the heat of the moment. You grasp hard on to his hips when he goes to pull out, begging him to come inside you... and when you look at him with all that hunger in your eyes he can't deny you.

💙 Even though Van's got no experience of a partner being pregnant he notices the changes in you even before you do and he suspects that you are.

💙 He doesn't say anything, but you notice he's being particularly attentive. He's always been protective of you but the way he's taken to treating you so carefully like you're the finest, most precious china that might shatter in his hands, you know something's up.

💙 "God's sake Van, you don't have to keep fussing round me, you know I'm a lot tougher and stronger than I look."

💙 You feel exasperated as he guides you back to sitting down on the sofa for the umpteenth time that day, protesting even though a small part of you loves this over-the-top caring side to him.

💙 There's also the fact that you've been feeling unusually tired and emotional recently for no apparent reason other than the fact that your period's due... hold on... what's the date again?

💙 OH FUCK!

💙 "I'm no expert but I know something's going on, and I'm guessing by the fact that you're looking at me like you've just seen a ghost means that you're thinking exactly what I've been suspecting for the last week."

💙 He's dropping down on to his knees in a flash, a hand smoothing down over the small swell of your belly. "Gonna take such good care of you Y/N, you and the little 'un... it'll want for nothing."

💙 The last thing he wanted was to bring a baby into the world, but now there's a possibility that he could be a father it's sparked something buried deep inside him, a fierce desire to nurture and protect that goes against all his violent tendencies.

💙 You know you won't be a conventional family but you'd given up the notion of any kind of normality in your life when you'd fallen for Van... and you'd accepted that.

💙 You don't know what the future will hold but what you do know with certainty is that he'll vehemently love and protect your child with his life and try his hardest to shield you both from the evils of this world.

Dad Van

💗 You'd always wanted just two children for as long as you'd remembered... a boy and a girl... and you'd been blessed. Everything was perfect just the way things were.

💗 Grace is enjoying primary school and Leo's taking his first steps and he's finally started to sleep through the night. The thought of going back to two hourly night feeds when you've been enjoying a full seven hours of solid sleep seems nightmarish. You don't want another baby.

💗 Van, on the other hand, has baby fever. He's so enamoured with the newborn stage that as soon as each of your kids starts to show a bit of independence he's making gooey eyes at tiny baby-grows in the local superstore and snuggling up behind you, hands on your belly, whispering into your ear. "Let's make another one babe... just one more..."

💗 "It won't be just one more though will it?" You sigh, turning around in his arms. "What was it I heard you saying to your mum the other day? You'd like at least five?"

💗 He scrunches his face up, nose wrinkling adorably. "Come on... look how happy we are. There's so much love in this house... I reckon there's enough to go around... and then plenty to spare..."

💗 You tell him no but you must admit you're coming around to the idea yourself, one of your best friends has just given birth and watching her feeding her baby has your hormones going into overdrive... so when you get home you flush your birth control pills down the toilet in a rash moment of recklessness... but you don't tell Van. You want it to be a surprise.

💗 As soon as you're only two days late for your period you know instinctively. You've been through it all before so you know the tender achey boobs and tiredness and bloated feeling aren't just your oncoming period. It's more than that.

💗 You find an old pregnancy test at the back of the medicine cabinet, and you're itching to find out for sure but you hold back. You don't want to deny yourself the experience of Van's infectious excitement as you wait for the results together.

💗 When Van comes home you're waiting for him on the sofa. You've sent the kids round to Mary and Bernie's for the afternoon and when Van sees you sitting there expectantly with your hands behind your back to conceal something he looks puzzled... and a little concerned.

💗 "What's going on love? Ya look serious. Are ya okay? Nothing's wrong is it? What ya got there behind your back?"

💗 You'd wanted to drag out the surprise and tease him but you feel fit to burst and you don't want to worry him unnecessarily.

💗 "You know you were saying you wanted to try for another baby?" You say, grinning as you produce the test kit with a flourish, watching his eyes widen comically and his mouth drop agape.

💗 "Wha... fuckin' hell love... are ya? Are ya really pregnant? Oh my god! But I thought ya didn't want..."

💗 You're on your feet in an instant, shushing him as you press your lips firmly against his, smothering his words. "Maybe I changed my mind," you grin as you pull away, leaving him looking gobsmacked. "And I don't know yet... not for sure. I thought we could do the test together, it's more exciting that way."

💗 He's looking at you in awe like you've hung the moon and the stars, overcome with emotion. "God I love you so much babe. I swear if this test turns out positive I'm gonna be the happiest man on the planet!"

💗 "And if it doesn't?" You want to know.

💗 He's pressing his lips to yours again, hands grasping your hips, pulling you flush against him. "Well... seeing as the kids aren't home we can try again can't we?"

[mythicamagic]

Do you have any tips for writing a natural progression of a physical relationship? I feel like a lot of fics go from kissing to sex without much in between.

I think these days people would probably see that as Slow Burn, even though their pace is perfectly natural for an irl relationship. Looking at that tag/genre might help you out.

By no means am I an expert so take my advice with a grain of salt. As an example: if you think about Regency romances being primarily Slow Burn, there's a focus there on intrigue, and 'feeling the other person out' with just words. When you're intrigued by something you want to spend time with it and examine it- and maybe this results in a clash of ideals. This could cause an emotional fallout that has them rebuilding the relationship from square one, but stronger because they have context for the other person now.

There's often a focus on hands in these series or films because they're the characters ONLY form of contact. They can't kiss because of social constraints, or maybe they're not there emotionally yet but God, their being radiates need just from the graze of their knuckles on skin.

All this mess is to say - if you have a build up of intrigue- attraction - restraint- it makes their physical intimacy feel like a wonderful payoff. Like a Sports Game you've been following and finally your team wins via a simple kiss and goes from there. The goals were all the little emotional beats along the way. During the restraint section of the relationship, showing little tells of their attraction builds up your physical intimacy alongside your emotional connection. Have them brush up against each other, maybe they have to grab the other to mind them away from something, maybe there was only one bed and they didn't end up having sex but spent the night awake and in agony because they're so close and can feel the contours of their body. Speaking of which - have them be attracted to that body before they can touch it. Do they like their hands? Their scent? Their hips? Maybe they catch themselves imagining those things. This builds anticipation and hunger for eventually touching it.

That's probably a key word there- hunger. You want your characters to crave each other to the point they're starving. I catch myself while writing Romance because sometimes one character might give their feelings away too early - and I have to delete the sentence because no, they gotta earn it. The characters dont even need to confess before physical intimacy - the act of sex itself could be their 'I love you' after months of need and want.

I'm sorry I rambled there, but basically find a reason to restrain your characters lolol I tend to like colder men in my ships because they take so long to emotionally open up that the payoff of intimacy feels worth it, but you can find any reason. Maybe they're just friends and don't want to jeopardise the relationship they have. Maybe they're mortal enemies who can't help but be attracted to that person's charisma. Maybe they just don't feel ready yet for that step of physical intimacy but they're burning with need anyway and this causes confusion and frustration.

Hope this mess helps! ❤️

[toastywatchesstevenuniverse]

S1 E49

The Message

Is it me or does Greg look....different?

He legitimately looks more tired than he did in his earlier appearances. Or maybe I'm just seeing that after knowing what he's been through in the last few episodes.

Okay honestly? I know I've been harsh on his character but holy shit this episode just made me feel so fucking bad for Greg. Look he's kind of a shitty dad but he's genuinely gotten better consistently with every appearance & it felt like the gems in this episode were....uncharacteristically mean to Greg. Like they were WAY meaner this episode than they have been prior. Like they were way more noticeably shittier towards the guy than normal. But I can forgive that as it didn't last long & it was quickly resolved & I was too sidelined by that ending to have more time to focus on that. I'm sorry butnthat ending kinda just fucking piledrived me so hard that I cannot talk about the rest of the episode now. This ending is too powerful.

I thought it was gonna be a filler episode but no evidently this episode just fucking told me "shit is about to go down get ready"

But it's fine because it wound up leading to an actual surprising ending. Holy shit.

I am NOT ready for the last 3 episodes....

First off: HI Lapis you're still my second fav. Love her. ❤️

Also

I'm sorry they keep building up Peridot as a big threat but I can't take her seriously after the dendy thing. 😭 This is just Dendy's quirky wine (probably bi or lesbian) aunt.

Still, I have no idea where this is headed but I get the feeling it's gonna get really depressing or confusing.

Or both.

I'm assuming both.

I literally just talked about how I'm NOT ready for whatever trauma Garnet has & this episode just confirmed my suspicions true. I knew it.

I FUCKING KNEW SHED HAVE SOME TRAUMA GOD DAMNIT REBECCA YOU CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH THIS.

Thanks Rebecca can't wait for you to cause me more pain & agony. Awesome.

[tamarakkoarchive]

Shin Megami Tensei II livetweet thread (5/8)

so.... beth died while barely having saying a word, daleth was a psycho and became brainwashed by an elf and gimmel failed at crypto and got offed by us

guess there's not much space for doubt that zayin is unequivocally the best character from the lab human roster

i already commented on SMT1 getting the chaos side better than other games and it goes beyond in SMT2, even gaians are depicted with much less nonsensical aggressiveness

idk what to think abt hiroko, to her credit she's given a lot more dialogue than previous heroines but her relationship with aleph still feels random

out of nowhere we get everyone in the game agreeing they are a couple when there has been no scene whatsoever that even distinguished them going from strangers to barely close to each other which we at least got in SMT1

here's my idea of a retake on belphegor: he doesn't turn him into a bishie or anything and just stays exactly the same except now he's playing on his phone while on the toilet

~

hooray we also visit the underworld in smt2!! it's the first time since pretty much the beginning that there are different bgms and graphics altogether, the agony in all those days stuck going through the same reused shit over and over can't be understated

the part where you have to help the japanese deities by building the body of masakado is the worst thing i had to endure in a smt game, even with a guide you just feel like screaming for help

imagine what i went through with MT1 and multiplay by 10 the number of items and locations

~

don't you fucking lie to me, this is the nickelodeon slime pool isn't it

OUR WAIFU HECATE HAS RETURNED for both my amusement and dismayal she's the very first boss i got game overs because the bitch drops a lot of instakills

(remember how humans are inherently immune to light in the snes games? basically she's the first boss to act actually smart and go for mudo instead. i had zero protection against it ❤️)

~

the animation of some sprites load a bit worse than others but this one takes the cake to the point it hurts my eyes

~

i can see why people like to draw aleph with a smiley face, he has a lot of goofy negotiation options lol although in my case i see him as those manly 90s kuudere bishies that unintentionally act like a clown while keeping the serious face

aleph gets church fanboys throwing money all over him while barely trying

~

only law gets normal water, if you're neutral you bathe in slime and if you're chaos go straight to the tomato soup

on this matter, i'm not worried about the options i'm picking because this time the most interesting routes for me are either law or chaos so i'm just going with whatever

that being said, this game is -awfully- biased towards law to the point i haven't been able to switch from it even once, the chaos healers are not only harder to find but they only allow your entry if you pay an 1k fee so it's quite an annoying expense in early game

~

i'm used to how toned down the series turned out to be in video game form despite the novel it originated from but this scene specifically made me go "ok if this wasn't something tailored to be allowed on a nintendo console You Just Know he would say another word instead of kill"

mind break ntr monster ass

sadly the one (1) r-rated smt with actual eroguro we got doesn't have art done by kaneko but some other rando. it's not that bad-looking compared to other guests artists but 🥺 the one chance kaneko had of going all out… poof

[maris-reading-nook]

Time to Shine by Rachel Reid

Pages: 382 Published: 26 Sep 2023 My Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Okay but this is so cute ❤️

Big thanks to NetGalley and Carina Press for the ARC!

I picked this up because I absolutely loved Heated Rivalry and The Long Game, so I knew I was in for a good time no matter what and I was right!! Is it perfect? No. Did I love it anyway? Heck yeah!

The main characters, Casey and Landon, are so lovable. Honestly, it was impossible not to become invested right away.

At the start, idk why, I had the fleeting thought that maybe this was gonna be a bit boring, but a few pages went by and I was 100% dialed in. I can’t find the quote but in the beginning Landon says something about how quickly Casey wins people over despite being a bit “too much” most of the time, and I kid you not, I had to laugh when I realized it happened to me too! I don’t remember my first impression of Casey but all I know is that suddenly I was one of these characters, completely won over by this 23yo golden retriever with adhd who never shuts up.

And Landon!! His sadness, his grief, was so palpable, I just wanted to reach into the pages and hold him, poor kid.

As with the other works I read of this author, what struck me the most was how easily she made me feel all kinds of emotions. I got butterflies in my stomach, I cried, I laughed, all of it. I love when that happens, when the build up to the moment you’ve been waiting for is so well crafted that a few words can give you an adrenaline rush like you’re actually in the room with the characters.

I felt that Time to Shine was well-written, it had the right amount of hockey, the side characters were interesting and multidimensional, and the main couple is absolutely adorable.

The only reason this is more of a 4.5 stars to me instead of 5 despite all the fun I had, is that it’s all a little too perfect. The characters always say the right things, there’s very little conflict and nobody puts their foot in their mouth in a way that is not cute or easily fixed. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, nothing wrong with not having to suffer through the agony of stupid misunderstandings and easily preventable miscommunication, but maybe this story could have done with a bit more depth?

There were a few subjects that I would’ve liked the author to have explored a bit more, if I’m being honest.

Landon’s sexuality (I don’t mean defining it, I mean his journey and his feelings about it), the impact of what happened to Erin on Landon’s family (it was one of the major plot points but then the resolution was a few lines and a hug), the past 8 years of Landon’s life, Casey’s relationship with his family, and more real world consequences to what’s happening around them. It was a little too cute and perfect.

Final thoughts: I loved Casey and Landon’s characterization, their relationship was so funny and I loved the way they talked to each other. There were some killer lines and the love felt so real.

[cas-kingdom]

“I apologise. I did not mean to wake you” with characters of your choice from marvel ❤️

A/N: Set during TFATWS, in Latvia.

“I apologise. I did not mean to wake you.”

You, still in the midst of dispelling the remembrance of a bad dream from your sleep-riddled brain, jolted on the couch. If you hadn’t been awake before, stirred by the sudden whistling of the kettle, you certainly were now.

Sitting up, you blinked to clear the haze of sleep, catching the dark outline of someone in the kitchen area of the room. You could tell it was neither Sam nor Bucky, but you felt secure enough in your deduction that anyone harbouring ill intentions towards you most certainly wouldn’t have wasted time boiling a kettle before heading over to the couch. Even as your eyes adjusted to the dark and you noticed with a slight leap of your heart that it was Zemo, you didn’t feel as alert as Bucky probably hoped you would be.

You shook your head lightly and rubbed at your eyes with your fists, then let loose a yawn. “Don’t worry,” you said tiredly, “I should probably thank you.”

Zemo rounded the kitchen counter with a mug of something in one hand. “Thank me?” he asked, taking a sip. 

You hesitated. You weren’t sure Zemo was the type of person you wanted to get into conversation with about your sleeping issues. You weren’t sure Zemo was the type of person you wanted to get into conversation with, full stop. 

“Never mind,” you said, pulling the couch throw up to your chin as you leant against the back of your seat.

Zemo walked towards you, very likely aware that your eyes were following his every move. Still, he didn’t let it deter him as he seated himself on the edge of the l-shaped sofa, crossing one leg over the other and settling back with his drink. He turned to look at you, the faintest of smiles pulling at his lips. “I insist.”

Something about the way he said it urged you on. You weren’t sure what exactly it was, but there seemed to be some intonation of familial assurance that you didn’t get from many people nowadays. Whatever it was, you found your muscles slackening as the tension crawled slowly out of your body and you subconsciously picked at a loose thread on the throw. You peered up at him, finding his expression to be one of patience.

“I was having a nightmare,” you elaborated. “But you woke me up, so thanks.”

Zemo nodded once and then turned his head, gently swirling the mug and watching its contents as it spun in fluid circles. “You have nightmares often?” he asked a moment later, and you felt your guard build itself back up once more.

“What’s it to you?”

Zemo’s brows rose and he took one hand from the mug to hold his palm up in front of him, an offer of peace. You doubted he knew you were wary of such questions because you knew all too well how quickly Zemo could turn the most insignificant of information against someone, but he seemed contrite all the same.

“I am just...finding common ground,” he admitted. “Again, I apologise.”

You frowned, your fingers pausing in their pulling of the thread. “You have nightmares too?” 

Zemo lowered his hand and shrugged lightly. “Most nights, yes. I dream of my family and all that happened to them.” He paused for a second, a familiar fire of agony blazing in his eyes, but he pushed it aside with ease, sitting straighter. “And you?” he asked, mostly without thinking but also with the hope you felt more comfortable now that he’d cracked open his door.

You caught your tongue between your teeth as you thought. There wasn’t one straight answer. “They...” you began, returning to the thread. “I dream about a lot of things. All the threats we’ve had to deal with. All the...the losses. All the stress of the years since...well. Since the beginning, really.” You let out an unamused laugh at that. “They all kind of merge together, I guess. I don’t know.” You slunk down the back of the couch slightly, almost ashamed to be speaking so vulnerably to a man you should hate. Alas, he’d been helpful so far with the mission to find Karli Morgenthau, and you were incredibly tired of hating people who didn’t deserve it anymore.

Zemo nodded assuredly this time. “I understand,” he told you. “Is that why you are sleeping here?” His lip twitched when your eyes glinted in the little light the moon gave you through the open window as you flicked them up to meet his gaze. He’d read you well. He was glad he still had that superpower out of all the ones fatherhood had bestowed upon him.

“I had a nightmare about Red Skull last night. I didn’t wanna wake anyone up if it happened to return tonight and I, you know...” You shrugged. “Screamed.’

“And tonight? You said I had woken you from a nightmare tonight.” You took too long to answer this time, so he figured he’d crossed an imaginary line. He changed his question. “Have you told James?”

Another unamused scoff, though this time it was quiet and short-lasting. “He doesn’t need anything else to worry about,” you insisted. Bucky knew about your nightmares, just as you knew about his, but it was rare either of you ever discussed them. If you awoke with a scream, he would run to you and sit with you until you fell back asleep. If he awoke in the same manner, you’d rush to his door, knock, and ask if he was alright. Sometimes, he’d say yes. Most often, he’d say no, but you knew it was safe to go in either way.

Zemo clucked his tongue and lifted a leg to cross underneath him. “Ah,” he said, “I don’t believe Mr. Barnes will ever stop worrying about you, nightmares or no.” He extended an arm then, the one holding the mug, and he nodded his head towards it when you didn’t react. “Please, try this. It is a recipe I used to make for my son when he had nightmares, and later for myself. I learnt it from my grandmother. It helps.”

You swallowed and stared at the mug, unsure if you should accept your fate and take it, or if you should hazard a guess at what was inside it before you inadvertently downed poison. The look in Zemo’s eyes assured you though, and you leant forward to take it from him, holding it with two hands.

“Don’t you want it?” He’d obviously made it for himself, so you knew he’d woken from his own nightmare. 

He waved a hand in your direction and reached for an open book on the table in front of him. “I have had enough for tonight. You drink it. Sleep.” He smiled then, the first genuine one you’d witnessed since you’d broken him out of his cell. “I’ll be here. I swear I will not let anything get to you.”

You mirrored his smile without much thought, biting at your bottom lip as you pondered over his words. You glanced down at the drink, feeling the warmth of it glaze your face, and brought it up to your lips to take a sip. It tasted like...honey. And lavender. Not that you’d ever eaten lavender before. Still, it warmed your throat and you drank it all before lying back down once more, covering yourself with the throw.

“Thanks, Zemo,” you whispered. “Good night.”

“Sweet dreams, Y/N.”

You knew who he was. You knew he’d ruined the lives of many. You knew he’d used one of your dearest friends as a weapon and caused him more pain than anyone could ever understand. You knew he was a criminal. You knew he was a villain.

But here and now, in the dark quietude of the large room, he was merely a man, reading a book, promising to sit by you and protect you from anything and everything, as he doubtlessly once had for his son. Rightly, you felt safe.

No nightmares made their way to you that night. It could have been the drink, but you figured it was the presence of Zemo which kept them at bay.

Avengers Masterpost

send me the first sentence of a fanfic and i’ll write the next five, except i don’t know when to stop writing so i guarantee there’ll be more than five

[danpuff-ao3]

BTW, I also wanted to say, I'm fucking mad at you rn. ❤️

You posted a podfic rec and I, foolish foolish person, trusted you and thought, these will be, you know, GOOD podfics. So I click on one and there's fucking character death and ambiguous ending and I'm like WELL FINE THEN??? I GUESS??

So yeah, I've been tricked! Bamboozled! I now have trust issues. Also I want to talk to the manager pls.

(yes the fic was wonderful but still fuck you and I mean this in the most loving way possible)

LISTEN. It builds character. And then kills it. 🤭

Also. I hate to tell you this. But...

I am the manager.

I'd apologize for the agony, except I'm not sorry at all. I am an angst-aficionado after all. And it was a wonderful fic. AND you got emotions out of it! So I'll take your hate and mistrust as all the thanks I need. 🥰

(btw try more podfics, they're not all that painful!)

(or are they????)