#the aftermath sure is going to be. well it's going to be something
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Myth - Meeting Bucky Barnes
Summary: After a grueling mission, Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers encounter Y/n, a mysterious and skilled operative brought in to clean up the aftermath. Bucky is immediately struck by her presence, while Y/n handles the situation with confidence and ease. Their brief interaction leaves Bucky intrigued and sets the stage for something more.
Warnings: Awkward Bucky And as always this was written with a black reader in mind but anyone can read it!
Main Masterlist l Series Masterlist
Part 1
Word Count: 1.1K
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Mutant!Reader
Meeting Bucky Barnes
There was one thing for sure; Bucky was ready to lay down. The mission against some Hydra operatives exhausted him immensely, especially with all of the destruction that they caused the nearing city. He checked on one more civilian before Steve tapped him on his shoulder. “Good job today, Buck.” Bucky only grumbles in response to his tiredness taking over his body. Steve laughed at his drained friend before wrapping his arm around his shoulder. “I just hate that we keep leaving these cities like this. They already had to deal with the torment of Hydra and now this.” Bucky waves an arm at the scene as they walk towards the quadjet that just landed for them. A few men step out and begin collecting some of the tech that Hydra had to examine it. “Fury has been hiring an outside source to clean up and apparently she’s really good.” Bucky looks at Steve confused. “She? There’s no way one person is cleaning this all up.” Steve shrugs his shoulders. As if on cue a beautiful woman, one of which Bucky has never seen before, steps out. He stops in his place completely to stare at her.
Y/n hated when Fury, really it was Maria, called her to clean up. They seemed to always have a huge load of chaos waiting for her. She much preferred tidying up whatever supernatural being that was roughing up a town. What she hated even more was the seemingly lack of care these so-called Avengers had in the towns that they fought in. Would it be that hard to have a contained fight in some building where no one could get hurt? Y/n stepped out of the quadjet stopping to talk to one her favorite field agents who took care of collecting any artifacts. “Hey, Stace! It’s good to see you. What don’t you want me to make disappear today?” Stacy raised her head. “Well, if it isn’t a Myth! If you could just leave the weapons for today…” Y/n eyes trail to the person behind Stacy, staring at her so blatantly. When she catches his eye, he quickly looks down. She knows who he is quickly by the gleam of his metal arm. She focuses back into her conversation with Stacy smiling, when she finishes. “Thank you for your help. One more thing, what’s the deal with Barnes over there?” Stacy looks back slightly to see where Y/n is nodding her head to before turning back to her. She raises her eyebrows in question, but never actually asking. “Well, he’s a bit grumpy and mostly hangs out with Captain Rogers when he’s not with him he’s alone or with Agent Romanoff. But he’s definitely a gentleman, but I think that’s all those boys from the 40’s. Oh and he’s single. I’ve heard rumors that Agent Romanoff has been trying to set him up for a while, but he rejects it everytime.” Y/n nods taking in the newfound information. “If you want, you might want to ask Cap and Sergeant Barnes for any other things that they would like you to clean up.” Stacy says with a wink. “Thanks! I’ll go do that.” Y/n says with a light smile and appreciation for the woman in front of her. Stacy waves goodbye and watches as Y/n begins making her way to where Bucky and Steve are with a smirk.
“Oh god, Stevie she’s walking over here.” His gruff voice comments. Bucky’s eyes are filled with panic as the woman stalks over to their position. Steve grins at his friends' panicked state. He hadn’t seen him like this since… well never. Even in the 40’s, he had girls flocking and stuttering over him. Bucky could instantly feel her confident aura, without even speaking to her. “Hello, Sergeant Barnes and Captain Rogers. I was told by Stacy to ask you guys if there’s anything else you would like me to clean up other than the obvious.” She gestures to the destroyed buildings. Bucky just stares at her, not a word exiting his mouth. Steve looks between the two with obvious tension. Steve clears his throat. “I think that’s it honestly! I apologize to you and your team for all of this.” Y/n laughs slightly, Bucky now wishing he could hear more of the sound. “No, team, just me.” She tells them. They both look confused. “Just you?” Two words from James Buchanan Barnes' lips leave Y/n weak in the knees. She almost forgets to respond. “Sorry I forgot to introduce myself. That may clear up some confusion. I’m Y/f/n, otherwise known as The Myth.” The boy's eyes widened in recognition. “You’re the one with the Cleaning Manipulation. I’m surprised we haven’t met you before.” Steve says with a hint of shock. “I usually try to leave as soon as possible. I usually leave exhausted after I finish up with SHIELD clean ups.” Y/n looks around and then suddenly the buildings start rebuilding themselves as well as the other areas that were filled with disarray. Bucky watches in shock as all of the chaos that they left goes away within minutes, leaving everything as if nothing had ever happened. He looks over to Steve who has the same look on his face as well, but he notices something else as well, Steve being completely cleared from the bruises and gashes that were on his face. Each of the cuts on Steve’s suit being magically stitched up follows. Bucky looks over himself as well, pushing his stomach where his previous bruised ribs were, when there is no pain, he looks up at Y/n with widened eyes. “You can heal people too?” Y/n shrugs. “My abilities qualify as being hurt as a mess, but there’s definitely limits. If you want, I’d be happy to talk about my abilities and things with you, Sergeant.” A blush sweeps over Bucky’s cheeks. Steve grins. “He’d love to.” Y/n continues to look at Bucky for a response to make sure he is comfortable. Steve nudges him when he still doesn’t speak. “Yeah, that sounds good.” His voice still gruff.. Y/n smoothly pulls out a pen from her left breast pocket and grabs Bucky’s non-metal hand, writing her number down. “You just call me when you’re ready to set up that conversation and I’ll be here, Serg.” She says with a slight smirk. Bucky’s mouth is slightly ajar. “It was nice to meet you both. Y/n turns around and starts walking towards the quadjet. “Bucky, call me Bucky.” He finally gets out and Y/n turns back around. “It was wonderful to meet you, Bucky, be sure to call me.” She winks and makes her way back to the quadjet. When she’s gone, Steve pats his best friend's shoulder. “She’s amazing.” Bucky finally says. “You’re never going to wash that hand are you?” Steve says jokingly. Bucky shakes his head. “Never.”
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#x reader#black!reader#marvel#sebastian stan#avengers x reader#bucky barnes x reader#reader#marvel comics#bucky barnes x black!reader#bucky x reader#bucky x black reader#bucky x you
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Whump prompt XVIII
Caretaker is trying to buy whumpee to free them.
Only they cannot afford the asking price, so they're left haggling down whumpee's value, picking out every conceivable flaw and arguing with the seller that whumpee really isn't worth that - all fully within earshot of whumpee.
#whump#pet whump#slavery whump#just a little scene prompt this time... or is it?#the aftermath sure is going to be. well it's going to be something#whump prompt
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Hey so uh
Are we being normal about this?
"In those days, a crimson moon shone down upon the subterranean realm, and not the dark sun of latter days." (Perinheri book)
And like the wiki says Kaeya's passive was changed from "Heart of the Abyss" because it unintentionally conflated with the Abyss in game and not the metaphor of "walking on thin ice over an abyss."
But I mean
For an unintentional connection it sure does come up a lot
But even if we do disregard that and go based on the intended meaning (via the wiki)
"The Book of Songs·Xiaoya·Xiaomin": "It's like standing on the edge of a deep abyss, like walking on thin ice."
I mean on one hand, yes we already knew about Khaenri'ahs connection to the abyss long before the Abyss Order was founded and before Khaenri'ah got nerfed for crimes against Celestia (fuckin Gold had rift hounds like this isn't new)
BUT this is the first solid confirmation that the Abyss wasn't a side note some (lookin at you 5 sinners) dipped their toes into but a defining part of the dynasty if it was named after the damn thing, right?
From the book of The Little Witch and the Undying Fire:
You see, we also call a will that comes down from the heavens an "archon." They are normally planets that have sentient life on them, and they number seven, and therefore they are called the "seven archons." As for the virtuals, their number varies between one, two, and four. The planet the little witch was on may well have been one. And in the case of such a world, the "virtual" would be the "dark sun."
"The planet the little witch was on may well have been one." Has become such an important line in connecting the abyss as a guiding force, that was not just used by khaenri'ah, but influencing them even if the people didn't realize it
Walking on thin ice over the abyss, believing they could balance that danger, but the ice cracked and Celestia responded
King Irmin was indisposed, we saw the kind of madness that overcame Chlothar, who only got the second hand abyssal experience from Mr. Crystal himself (Vedrfolnir), Gold went Mold for a second if her chapter in The Little Witch has any accuracies to herself (also one of her companions becoming a pirate - I see you Kaeya's Grandpa)
For the Sinners to be seeking perfection when the Abyss Order talks about their guiding force being something of chaos
Idk it's just neat that one line can solidify and make sense of previous tales within the game that we didn't technically have the context for previously and I'm excited to see what the rare disease mentioned at the end is going to be
Also just as a bonus note
Celebration: Fruit of Wisdom
What knowledge might the fruit of wisdom bring, were it to descend upon the land? Either way, it'll taste good as a drink if left in Diona's hands.
I wasn't part of the event, but if they straight up saw fruits of wisdom and the first thought was to consume it then I just wonder if fruits of the abyss looked just as appetizing
#genshin impact#genshin#I actually have no idea what all to tag this as - im so sick rn but I wanted to get it out before the update 😔#see I dont remember rn if all of this is common knowledge or not so it's not really a post about anything#just general excitement over confirmation#but also there being four Virtual's is uh - well a thing lmao surely not gonna be relevant later#how many dynasties has khaenri'ah had now?#just think of this as a nice refresher of everything we already knew before the new AQ drops#me getting excited over the knowledge that grass is green - listen - im so sick be nice#but I am interested in any ideas y'all have over how this shapes what we already know#and if the Abyss was actually in a role similar to the archons - what changed to lead so many in the higher rankings into madness?#was the Abyss just like ''what if I granted a handful of ants vast knowledge and sent them back would that be fucked up or what''#and then just sat back and watched the aftermath of these tiny creatures striving to obtain something that was never meant for them?#archons: im going to guide these tiny humans into becoming the best that they can be#abyss: im gonna commit so many unethical experiments and make it your problem#but also depending on translation Kaeya's passive either means him containing the abyss or a cautionary tale about what's already happened#... hey didn't the crimson moon dynasty all chug a drink of their own before the eclipse dynasty took over?
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I. Did not achieve a lot today (understandable considering the circumstances), but. You need to See.
The SADDEST. SOGGIEST. Sharena I have EVER drawn.
Also maybe a little snippet as a treat...
You'll have to fight my messy roughs and handwriting for it though 😤😤😤
#wip#i think. maybe i can just allow myself to relax. ease up on the intense paranoia that plagues me.#mostly because i want to make things painful. actually.#not just bittersweet. so sweet it fucking hurts. it aches and aches and aches and aches. ect.#i actually don't have a lot of faith in my ability to finish this one. firstly i wanted to just do one page#but after all my practice i've gotten a p good feel for pacing. and this feels like it's a two-pager#and i Know. i know. the fucking. lvl 40 convo comic.... i KNOW.#but also. just in general. some things are just so agonizing. to try and yank out of me.#so L + ratio + more work than i bargained for + owuch. ouugh. ow. ouch. owie. owww....#last bit of context is this takes place shortly after zacharias' disappearance.#although i'm actually not sure how i want to go about that. if i wanna see if i can show it in the comic itself#like all i'd need really is one flashback panel just showing the immediate aftermath of 'where is zacharias?' after battle#or if i'd imply it through the text or if straight up. i just say it in the caption. honestly entirely depends#well i was gonna joke depends on how lazy i feel but more like. i think it's more parsing out where my focus Should be.#all of this is granting that i can. fucking. even get to a proper rough draft. i'm not hopeful.#but do you see my visions...... maybe....#esp them falling back on each other HARD. doing something that maybe both swore to 'grow out of'#in the wake of an extremely disorienting and traumatic event. that hits each of them uniquely hard.#and through the growing pains you see. oh. this is how they grew up. this is how they've always been.#when. they could be.#my art
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' ━Ah, so that's your brand new hiding place. '
A pair of familiar, inadvisable shoes seemingly materializes out of thin air. There's a grin on the man's face as he bends down to eye level, red hues exploring the hiding space his stray snuck in and slowly turning on the side of incredulous concern.
' How in the hell did ya managed to get in here? You're taller than me, and almost as bulk, too! Only someone like Brother Hanu could get cramped in here, and even he... '
They both know how. the Enigma doesn't answer him, limiting himself into quietly staring at his adoptive father as the playfulness in his voice disappears.
' One of these days, huh? ' A sigh. ' Come on- scoot over, 'm coming in. '
There's a long pause. Kaeya doesn't move- but he resumes speaking, a tad on the side of incredulous.
' Dad... It's too big for both of us, We'll both be stuck if you come in. '
' That so? ' The man named Gallagher sighs with relief, chuckling in the same breath. ' Right. Would have been worth a shot, though- look who's speaking again. '
It rips a chuckle out of him, for the way it always works- his dad is never afraid to do something scandalously funny to shock him out of overthinking. This includes trying to reach for him in a small, battered metal closet.
Sometimes, it's just a thing that needs to be done.
There's a can of something similiar to SoulGlad in violet-hued fingers, the comfortable silence, and his father's leg pressed against his as they sit with their backs on the wall.
A drop of condensation comes in contact with his thumb, unfelt. This is where Enigma breaks the silence.
' Dad... '
He hesitates, a million questions in his mind. He picks the closest one, reels the others in.
' This feeling of emptiness... when will it stop? I thought it was going to go away on his own, but it never did. Never does. '
There's an awry sound coming from his side. ' Hard to say, ' he starts, the movement that turns his face into a small grimace of sympathy. ' 'm kinda afraid that you put yourself into a bad situation, kid. '
' I did? '
' Yup. This... ' He gestures at Kaeya entirely, careful, ' avatar that you took, the one you told me belongs to your friend... you're really not supposed to do that. Take his looks, I mean- it just makes everything more complicated than it needs to be. Adds a whole lot of weight where there shouldn't be. Kinda jumbles everything that should be simple... '
His dad trails off, irises taking on the looks of his stray without the irony shining in his eyes.
' You still haven't told me why ya picked him, out of all traits you could have taken. Of the amalgamate you coulda been. '
No- no, he has not. The reason only makes sense in his brain, only tie together when Kaeya Alberich has been in the life of someone for a while. And Kaeya Alberich never got to know his father at all.
His mouth opens, words lost. Impostor closes it, opens it again, shakes his head almost helplessly, the faint buzz of confusion starting behind his eyes before a warm hand ruffles his hair, stays in place over mussled cobalt locks.
' Don't sweat it, ' the man that is his father tells him, a lopsided grin on his face. ' As long as it makes sense to you, it's alright. You gotta solve this emptiness thing yourself- I can't help you much, here. '
A few pats on his dusty behind, and his dad is up and going again. Kaeya shakes his head at the hand being offered to him, signaling that he'd like to be alone and in here a little longer.
' You gotta be glad we have a lotta time to think about stuff, no? 'is the last thing he tells Kaeya before he's out, leaving a wink and the bark of a laughter behind.
and a cold can of soda, untouched.
The hut is empty. There's nobody else but him, and the unheartly silence of the abandoned planet hs picked as his residence.
Kaeya's digits follow the jagged edges of his newest wound, a gaping hole where pale diamond should be. The skin has been broken like porcelaine, long cobalt strands trying to hide the lack of eye and the emptiness where skull and human gore should be.
Gray materia floats around his head, trying to recompose him and shoo his fingers, foreign, cold objects, away from the problem. But the wound is fresh, terribly big, and the effort requires an addictional component to speed up the healing factor.
The surviving eye is as faulty as the one he took from Kaeya Alberich: all he sees are shadows dancing out of his reach, the blurry, darkened form of the table, the chairs, the kitchenette and the items he so loves to decorate having become hostile obstacles he has to avoid.
In the corner of the main room, there are two big tanks of the liquid coming from the Misty Sea- it's what he needs to fix the missing side of his head.
It's what he needs. A few steps ahead, and he'll close his digits around the neck of one. Feel around the tab in the bathub, plug it in, and pour.
Simple actions to restore himself.
But he thinks. And thinks. And he can't do this.
He can't do this.
He just can't do this.
He can't move.
But he has to.
The next minutes, perhaps hours, perhaps days, are a blur. All he knows is that, when he comes to some sort of consciousness again, his fingers are still tight around the plastic neck of a much lighter tank, the smell of the restoring liquid is right under his nose. His location seems to have changed.
Kaeya doesn't remember doing all this. All that he knows is that the ceramic of the bathub is so wonderfully cold and grounding against his warm, cracked skin, and he doesn't want to move. He has no will to, but something in his body has reacted to try and make him fix himself.
But he can't do it. His legs feel like lead, like cement.
He can't do it.
He wants to.
But he just can't do it.
Triumph and progress feeds people with some sort of frenzy, an injection of adrenaline putting them on top of the world, wanting to shout to look at them! They can accomplish ANYTHING!
But he isn't a person. It makes sense that the little energy he had after completing his mission has oozed out of him from the gaping wound.
An injury won't kill him- simply slow him down. His dad and mentor said that he has all the time in the world to do what he needs and wants to do, figure out when the emptiness ends.
Today, it doesn't. It presses him against the cold surface, and he's happy to allow his heavy body to surrender, letting his warmth disperse over it.
He can stay like this for a bit. He did what he had to do, and now it's time for him to give in to exhaustion. Just for a little bit of time, just for a small nap.
With the part of his forehead that can still feel, Kaeya curls against the side of cold marble, and lets his eyelid fall shut over the mocking of shadows dancing just out of his reach.
Maybe the emptiness never goes away. But I can rest for a bit... just for a little bit... and then I'll be good to go.
Just for a little bit...
#from another realm ━ (ooc)#riddle me this; is everything that you remember real and nothing but the pure truth? ━ (H:SR V.)#you no longer know me; shrouded in the fog of mystery ━ (H:SR V. Headcanons)#the cute bit of supportive gallag.her won't save you from the sad underneath : )#when kae.yas body tries to heal him and force him to move but hes so mentally out of it and exhausted that he blocks out doing stuff#warning that this is kind of sad#i painted it as him being alone but its ok if a muse wants to find him like this! a aftermath can be plotted... as a treat#but your muse will have a fking heart attack kjdhsdsjdf#imagine traveling with him for a while then you leave and come back to this scene#and get reminded that he may as well not be human but he sure is tired and experiences a lot... HOOO BOY does he experience a lot.#could be hurt/comfort could be angst... could be the reveal that even if he isn't human and is super reliable he has moments when hes tired#too tired to fix himself and too tired to keep going. no sense of accomplishment. no triumph#just a wound and something sad chaining him down. and he has NEVER felt this empty and tired and human before#body horror ;;#repetition ;;
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heartbeat :)
everyone shut the fuck up. they're resting.
@gureshin-week-2023
#why don't you go listen to shinya's heartbeat and maybe you'll calm down.#here u go guys. fluff. i am capable of doing it.#i guess this could also count as au#since it's part of my imaginary aftermath au where everything is over they're safe the curse is lifted yayyy#but also because of the way he died shinya's heart is now failing so he gets additional oxygen sometimes#surely this is not angsty. right#not sure if i will be able to finish things in time but i definitely want to post something for fem and salvation as well#gonna have to pass on the other days :'>#owari no seraph#seraph of the end#shinya hiiragi#guren ichinose#gureshin#gureshinweek2023#they're happy and safe forever actually ons was just a prank#art stuff
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the thing about judge/calliope is that they really did have a fairly normal budding relationship (<- or as normal a budding relationship as a girl living out the evil version of every portal fantasy story and a preteen monsterthing could have) until everything went Wrong (<- surprise werewolf transformation and maiming) after which judge basically immediately forgave calliope on the grounds that ‘it wasn’t really her doing that’ (<- the maiming) and went “hey can we please still date?” and calliope categorically could notttt handle this so he went “no sorry no dating only guilt driven homoerotic devotion and laying myself at your feet like a dog allowed now” and judge went “sooooo can we still make out?” and calliope said “babygirl at this point i would literally let you waterboard me do whatever you want i will kill anyone who so much as implies they’d hurt you” and judge went “umm okay i guess i can work with– hey wait what was that last part?” and calliope went “nothing 🥰” with their teeth already fully clamped in the throat of some guy who looked at judge funny
#to be so fair to calliope can you imagine going beastmode and almost killing the girl you have a crush on and then staying the fuck away#from her in the aftermath bc obviously she doesn’t want anything to do with you. and then she tracks you down and says that#not only is she not even a little bit mad at you she in fact wants to make your relationship official. and you’re like fourteen.#i’m just saying that i would probably not handle it. well. either.#i also need to write something from judges perspective to dig into her psyche bc like. girl something is going on in there for sure.#like i know the basics i know she has a saviour complex and is constantly exhausted and yearning for a past she can never return to butlike#there’s more in there i know there is. perhaps the biggest victim of ‘seems normal by default due to the people around her’ in this wip.#my beautiful prince charming who has decided that the dragon is her princess actually#wip: ghost story#god i need a judge and calliope tag
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they did not have to go this hard omg
#tye spoilers#they really said: let's have sad animation for the entire season but Kahaku can have amazing facial expressions for a second 😎#AND IS THAT NEW MUSIC I'M HEARING#IT GOES VERY HARD TOO#...i wonder if the 'i want it to end' is a poor translation on the subber's part?#i'm pretty sure i've got official subs here#but in both the weekly and volume release of the manga#he says something more along the lines of just wanting to rest/have some relief#now he just sounds suicidal (esp with his more extreme facial expression here. manga fushi just looked exhausted)#not that I don't absolutely adore a more suicidal aspect being given to a character#especially since his earlier tone of suicidality wasn't very well emphasized in the anime imo#also good fucking god the color grading on these gifs is atrocious#my internet is being weird so i had to use clipchamp and it shows :(#ALSO I NEED TO GO WATCH HAIRO'S BACKSTORY SCENE AGAIN#BECAUSE EVEN IN THE MANGA. I NEVER REALLY UNDERSTOOD IF THAT WAS INDEED TASSETTE???#his entire backstory doesn't make a lick of sense but sjdhgfdjsjhdegydhdiye was that actually tassette???????#hmnbnmnbn there's three episodes left but i really think there's only 2 episodes worth of manga content#but i'm bad at estimating#like surely the next ep won't be ENDING with Bon's death right? and maybe they'd dedicate an ep to the aftermath of that#but then what.....#also i still can't tell if kahaku was lying. more just...panicked and making excuses up on the spot?#just a frantic 'it's not what it looks like i didn't mean it!!!' type vibe
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We need laws in NZ protecting us from getting those pesky marketing emails we didn't consent to: marketing list, cart reminder, whatever other bullshit they can think of. It's not "converting the sale", it's just turning me into the Incredibly Angry Hulk lol.
And often there is no way to unsubscribe. Grr.
Might do that thing that was suggested in a YouTube video once and make a rule to send all emails that say unsubscribe to a separate folder to be dealt with when spoons.
I even got this super creepy one from a site saying they saw I was browsing and am I still interested in X + Y item - i got the major ick + basically vowed never to buy from them again lol. Plus they cost too much for quality control worse than dropshippers/AliExpress etc.
#privacy laws#nz privacy laws#not sure if privacy is the right word but i guess so#and for the love of god stop shop pay from sending me incessant 2fa tsxts/emails I didn't request#so annoying#pissy Rachel#the Eu would certainly not be having it#nz consumer protection#or something#marketing emails + adtopia are the bane of modern society#well i mean aside from all the horrific things going on in the world and the degradation of the planet obv#the world just needs more rights in general#employment rights human rights consumer rights#not in order and theres prob more but most can fit under human rights i guess#disability rights too#i feel like this marketing bullshit disproportionately affects neurodivergent and even otherwise disabled folks#esp including schizospec who have a documented correlation of compulsive spending and also hoarding disorder etc#compounded by poverty/inability to work thus unemployment or underemployment (tho what is the definition of the latter these days)#I'm so proud of gen z standing up and questioning the norm and what the 99% really gets from overwork/hustle culture/grinding the 9-5#at the same time i just hope there will still be people around in healthcare etc to help out me and the other schizospec going thru it 🥲#so i also wish for better worker's rights in healthcare especially#i often bitch abt the mental health system but i am ever grateful for what support I've received and i don't say it enough#there are passionate compassionate people there for the right reasons. and they need to be valued more#oops convoluted tags this wasn't meant to become a tangiential ramble#guess there's still some residual insanity in this aftermath of Yesterday's Struggle Day and also another hot muggy day today#i need to get on with studying my voli induction manual
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need someone older.
(teacher!coriolanus × student!reader.)
summary: a teacher can do a lot in private lessons.
c.w: reader is 19 for repeating a year, age gap (coryo's 29), fingering, tummy bulge, heavy smut, edging (f. recieving), overstimulation, stuffed panties, mild public sex, petnames (coryo calls reader bunny, pet, good girl.), reader thinks coryo is married so . cheating implications, marriage proposal
being a dumb girl was something you tried your best to do ever since you repeated the first year of high school, watching all your friends graduating before you was something you weren't proud about- not for them, but for you. you were supposed to be by their side.
thankfully, you had your professor, coriolanus snow. god. he was the only reason for you to pay attention to class (or at least try to), you were hungry for his approval. for you to be called a "good girl", and be said that you've done well in your tests? yeah, you were willing to do anything for that.
when he offered you private classes, you said yeah without even thinking much. you needed to learn, and spending more time with him was something you craved for. the ring on his finger? fuck it. you wanted it. you deserved it. more than his wife – if he had one.
you've been day dreaming about it constantly, eyes always searching for his on every class you had with him, and he would keep that smile painted on his face, not wanting anyone to think you were the reason for him to be smiling, even if you were, the didn't need to know about it.
"bunny," he voiced, leaning on your desk and taking advantage of the fact that you both were on the library, every student on the school had gone home and the teachers had gathered to go to a nearby bar. "stop looking at my dick now, will we?" he said, chuckling at you.
"huh?" you asked, finally waking to your reality.
"you need to learn that if you don't want to repeat a grade again." he said, sitting by your side, his hand holding your thigh. "you don't want to repeat now, do you?" you shaked your head negatively, and he loved seeing you like that, shy as a kitten even if you usually had his dick on your mouth when that used to happen. "c'mon, don't look at me like that. we have to put these things on your brain if you want to graduate already." he said.
his fingers slowly travelled all the way up on your panties, finding a small damp on the fabric, he looked at you with his usual smirk, his pupils blown already from everything he was about to do to you.
and now you looked like a mess. hands gripping on the library desk as your legs trembled with the aftermath of every time you almost came. you counted six till now, crying from how good it felt having him behind you, his fingers thrusting lewdly into your cunt.
"c-coryo- t-teacher, please. please stop it, i have to cum- i can't hold it in anymore!" you begged, clenching as his fingers rubbed deliciously on your clit after thrusting so many times inside you.
"well, it's not my fault, pet. you're the one getting your questions wrong." he said, pulling his dick to tease the core of your pussy, your cries only making him feel and making his ego bigger. "tell me, baby, how do you want it?"
"q-quick, pleease! if it get slower i-i think i'll die!" you said, legs spread as your skirt revealed a small part of your ass.
"oh, c'mon, i'm sure you can take it, baby" he purred in your ear, the tip of his cock teasing your pussy and slapping your clit slightly, making your body jolt slightly. you bend over, your elbows being now your main support at that table.
"please, teacher..!" you begged. but he didn’t even bat an eye to your cries, slowly sliding his dick inside you, and fuck, you both fucked on wednesday, how come he always seems to stretch you up so good? the pace he choose to torture you with was so slow, making sure you felt every inch of his dick inside you, stretching you, making you his. "please, don't do that to me. j-just ask something easier!" you cried.
"easier? okay... let's see" his hips bucked slowly into yours, your pussy gushing around him as if your own body needed that- as if he was the hair you breathed for. "what's your age, babe?" he asked, a playful tone being cast as his free hand massaged your boob, pinching on your nipple and freeing both your boobs from it's cage.
"n-nineteen." you said, and he laughed again as he said: "good girl, you're right.", his hips giving you a powerful thrust that made you cum with only that, making you cry from your own humiliation.
"ah, bunny, don't tell me you came already only with that." he said, joking with your face as you cried.
"i'm sorry- too good. i-it was too deep." he laughed, pulling back and thrusting deeper again, this time, you made sure not to cum again, edging yourself as he changed your position to put your leg over his broad shoulder, his dick making a bulge appear at your tummy. he loved that view- much more than he loved you.
"look at you, taking me so well. how does it feel, baby? use one of the words we learned at the literature class," he grunted your tightness coating his dick with your own juices, "use them, even if it's just two, and i'll let you cum."
"tortuous," you begin, crying from how good it felt, from how dumb you were getting. "spiralling, it's twirling my insides!" you cried. and he smilled, kissing and licking your tears before placing the most gentle kiss on your lips, pouding faster into you as you closed your eyes shut, moaning and grunting from all the pleasure- and yet you tried your best to avoid moaning only to hear his moans and the sounds of flesh slapping against flesh.
"good girl." he said, his hands holding your hips as he fucked you. it felt truly out of your world experience. his phone ringed just at the right moment he hit your cervix. "t-teacher, your phone- it can be your wife." you said, earning a frown from him as he turned the phone off.
"wife? baby, i'm single." he said, chuckling at you. "you've been walking around school with my cum stuffed in your panties even thought you thought i was married?" he pounded into you with a more quicken pace. "god, what a dirty girl you are. fucking around with married teachers." he teased you.
you felt a heat on your cheeks that you never felt before. god, how much would you end up humiliating yourself? "b-but, fuck! y-your ring-"
he showed you the ring. taking it off his finger with his mouth and sticking his tongue to you, an invitation for you to take the ring.
"keep it." he said once you took the ring
"but- s-sir, i-"
"mm, bunny, i'm a faithful man." he said. "and right now, i'm faithful to you." he said. you squirmed deliciously at the feeling of his cock filling you up again, his tip on your cervix as you came again, and soon enough, he came too.
he helped you get dressed into your panties again and straightned your clothes, a cast kiss on your lips before he smiled sweetly at you, putting the ring on your middle finger.
"i hope you know what that means."
"i-i do." you said, for both questions heavily implied in that context.
"great. then make sure to graduate, bunny." he smiled. "i'm sure the honeymoon will be great."
#coriolanus snow x reader#young coriolanus snow#young president snow#tbosas smut#the hunger games the ballad of songbirds & snakes#coriolanus snow fanfiction#coriolanus snow imagine#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus x you#x reader#teacher crush#teacher x student#dark!coriolanus snow
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okay so I was doing a Research™️ about ancient Greek etymology as one does and I found some Things that made me want to Violently Claw My Arms Off please allow me to force feed you my discoveries
So there are 2 words for "not" in ancient Greek, depending on the context: ou and mē. Having introduced himself in the Cyclops episode as " ou tis", or No-man, he then stabs Polyphemus in the eye. When Polyphemus' brothers come to check on him, they say this:
"... surely no man [mē tis] is carrying off your sheep? Surely no man [mē tis] is trying to kill you either by fraud or by force?"
Right after this, after the other cyclopes ditch Polyphemus, Odysseus's inner monologue goes something like this:
"Then they went away, and I laughed inwardly at the success of my clever strategem [metis]." (pronounced mEH-Tis)
Now, there's a difference between mē tis and metis. [mē tis] (pronounced mEH-Tis with a space between the syllables) is the literal translation for "no man". Metis is a word for extreme intelligence/cunning, which is something Odysseus is famous for.
Now, there are several examples of abuse of metis/intelligence in the Odyssey, but I think the juxtaposition between [mē tis], or the concept of anonymity, and metis, or extreme intelligence, is REALLY interesting. Odysseus's adoption of the title "No-man" was characteristic of metis--it was a really smart move that simultaneously hid him from the cyclops and avoided any future consequences. It was a highly effective strategy all wrapped up in a nest little package with a bow on it.
But when he revealed himself as Odysseus of Ithaca, effectively throwing off No-man (anonymity and [mē tis]), that was characterized as idiocy--he's essentially doxxed himself, and now he's doing to (spoiler alert) get tossed around the Mediterranean by Poseidon for the next 10 years.
This is really interesting because it lets you see the parallels/codependency between metis(intelligence) and humility. When Odysseus refused to allow himself to go unnoticed (hubris) he suffered for it. BUT when he declined instant glory/satisfaction (kleos) in order to achieve the long term goal of survival, he was rewarded with Athena's favor (pay attention. This part is important).
And this situation repeats itself MULTIPLE TIMES in the Odyssey--the EXACT SAME THING happens near the end of the book, with the suitors. When. Odysseus is dressed as a beggar and the suitors/Antinious are abusing him, he ACTIVELY CHOOSES not to react--he doesn't stand up and rip off his disguise and start hollering "TIS I, ODYSSEUS OF ITHACA! FEAR MY WRATH"
No. He sits there patiently and waits. He plans and schemes and quietly orchestrates their downfall without alerting them of it. Why? Because he learned his lesson the first time this happened. He buried his rage and adopted what was, according to Grace LA Franz, a more feminine form of metis, weaving a web of destruction for his enemies that ultimately resulted in their total annihilation (see Weaving a Way to Nostos: Odysseus and Feminine Metis in the Odyssey by Grace LaFranz). His patience allowed him to win the whole prize--no questions asked, no 10-year-long-business-trip strings attached--just the sweetness of a full victory. And he is, once again, rewarded with Athena's favor--both in the battle with the suitors and in the aftermath (cleanup/reuniting with Penelope).
This really reinforces the idea in the Odyssey that Odysseus's defining characteristic is not just his intelligence--it's his ability to learn from his mistakes. He used what he learned at the Lotus Eaters Island against Polyphemus--the Lotus Eaters drugged his men, so he drugged Polyphemus. He used what he learned from Circe and Polyphemus against the suitors--Circe used false sweetness and honeyed words to lure his men into a trap, so that's exactly what he did to the suitors. His hubris on Polyphemus' island cost his whole crew their lives, so he intentionally left well enough alone until the right time. He didn't just learn from his failures--he turned them into BATTLE STRATEGY.
i don't care what anyone says that is completely totally and objectively awesome
#Odysseus is a certified baddie 112% of the time#he's literally the coolest you can't convince me otherwise#there's a reason that literally everyone has a crush on him#even the lesbians#its the wordplay. his words#read me a poem in iambic pentameter you bloody stinky man#literally everyone: his sad wet vibes and dark undereye circles have captivated me entirely#odysseus#the odyssey#tagamemnon#odysseus x penelope#telemachus#epic the musical#the cyclops saga#odysseus of ithaca#poseidon#etymology#ancient greece#ancient history
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⋆✴︎˚。⋆⚠︎ Cuteness Overload ⚠︎⋆✴︎˚。⋆
summary: adorable things the blue lock boys do that turn your brain to mush
BLUE LOCK M.LIST | enjoy 😮💨 - aria
my requests are open!! send me some!!
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ᰔᩚ Isagi Yoichi
• He chews on the inner corner of his mouth whenever something makes him blush too much and it gives him this adorable pouty face. He furrows his brows and averts his eyes away as his pale skin turns a fluttery shade of pink. If you giggle at him it’ll only make it worse lol.
• When he kisses you he makes sure to bump his nose against yours before pulling away. Just a little boop. It’s so cute. Definitely does Eskimo kisses with you all the time.
• He subconsciously reacts to your facial expressions with the same expressions. If you make a worried face, he’ll do the same. If you make a surprised face he’ll do the same. It isn’t in a mocking manner, he just gets so focused on you that he instinctually mimics you.
ᰔᩚ Bachira Meguru
• Bachira is always trying to play footsies with you. Whether you’re sitting side by side or across from each other he’s nudging your feet and pressing soft kicks to your legs under tables where no one can see. It’s a good way for him to release pent up energy and he likes that it’s a little thing just for the two of you.
• he presses soft kisses to your eyelids to wake you up in the mornings. He’ll go back and forth until he feels your lashes flutter against his lips, then he makes his way down to your nose and your lips and your cheeks.
• love bites!! Bachira is always taking a little nibble of you. Your shoulders, neck, ears, cheeks, hands, arms, nose. He doesn’t bite hard enough to hurt, but sometimes it’ll leave marks which he loves seeing in the aftermath.
ᰔᩚ Itoshi Rin
• Rin will casually just rest his hand on the top of your head, russle your hair, give you a good noogie. Simply because he can.
• Sometimes when you guys hold hands he’ll stuff both your guys’ hands in his coat pocket or your coat pocket. Preferably his so he can just drag you around and be sure that you’re by his side as close as possible lol.
• Make out sessions with Rin never end in parting lips. He has to make sure he gives you at least one or two more small pecks before you both fully pull away, he does this instinctually and wouldn’t ever try to fight it. He does this when kissing you goodbye as well, he just can’t fight the urge to get a few more kisses in before you leave. And then brushes it off like it wasn’t the cutest most needy thing ever.
ᰔᩚ Itoshi Sae
• Sae is always playing with your fingers, your hair, your sleeves, the hem of your shirt, any part of you that he can mindlessly fiddle with while the two of you sit through conferences and interviews that he doesn’t really care about.
• If he starts doing something with you, he won’t ever finish it without you. If he started reading a book while he was cuddling with you, he can’t read it again until the next time he’s cuddling with you. If you guys started a show/movie together he can’t finish it until you’re there too
• He does cat blinky eyes at you all the time. He uses it as a form of nonverbal acknowledgement when you guys are surrounded by a lot of people or in the mornings when you’re both too sleep ridden to speak. He sends two slow blinks your way and it feels like the sweetest thing ever
ᰔᩚ Nagi Seishiro
• Nagi has a habit of staring at you sometimes. Whenever he gets bored of mindlessly looking around, he’ll avert his gaze to you and he’s endlessly entertained. He does it with soft eyes and a gentle pout on his face, tracing your body up and down, watching your features with every reaction you make. He’s hoping that if he stares at you long enough the rest of the world will disappear and you’ll be coaxed into his arms.
• When he really wants something and he’s trying to give you puppy dog eyes as a form of persuasion he’ll push his hair back and out of his face so you can really see him pleading. Honestly it works every time bc his face is just too handsome and adorable to deny.
• He stoops himself down to your height sometimes in a sly, mocking way. He bends his knees when he does it so he looks really silly and he gives you a jokingly shocked look, “So this is what the world looks like from down here…wow.” He has plenty of other ways that he’ll tease you or try to shock you with his height but this is his favorite. (Sorry if you happen to be over 6’2 lol)
ᰔᩚ Mikage Reo
• Reo never had a spending problem until he met you. He was raised to be smart with money, especially since he’s got a LOT of it. But now he finds himself buying the stupidest most useless things just because it reminds him of you. Will literally buy weird knickknacks and chachkis from random street vendors and sketchy online stores just because something was the same color as your eyes or he thought you would think it was cute.
• He probably hides this from you but he keeps a little box of mementos from your dates, trips, just anything to do with you. He keeps game, plane, and movie tickets, polaroid photos of you, bookmarks from books you gave him, jewelry you left at his house that’s long forgotten, little slips of paper you’ve doodled on, receipts from your favorite restaurants. He cherishes all of it it’s so cute.
• Whenever you guys are home and you aren’t giving him enough attention he comes up to you and pinches your cheeks. He’ll even smoosh your cheeks around your face until you finally get annoyed enough that your eyes are on him, then he scoops you up and takes you to lay with him with a smile on his face like he wasn’t being an annoying brat two seconds ago
ᰔᩚ Rensuke Kunigami
• Kunigami is signed up to a flower service that delivers flowers to your house every week. The bouquets change with the seasons, and there’s a short and sweet note attached to them. Usually just “I love you!” or “thinking of you ❤️”. If he’s off in another country for games and such he makes the notes a bit longer, “by the time you get this it’ll be night where I am, wish you were in my arms darling.” or the occasional silly one “you’re not sick of these are you? If so, oh well! Hope you don’t miss me too much love :)”
• When he knows you’re coming home from a stressful or tiring day he turns the air on in your house to make it really cold so that he can welcome you at the door with arms open and a blanket draped around him, urging you to climb in and never return. Don’t worry about your clothes or makeup bc he’s already getting you changed and wiping your face like you’re his newborn baby. When you finally pass out within 20 minutes of being in the little cocoon he’s made for you, he smiles softly at his success and falls asleep with you.
• Refers to you guys as being married VERY often. Loves watching you get flustered over it. He does it even when you aren’t around though. Gets side eyes from his teammates when he does it in interviews, smirking to himself and wishing he could see your rosey red cheeks as you watch him say it on the TV back at home.
HONORABLE MENTIONS
(Ngl these are kinda just silly and for fun)
ᰔᩚ Michael Kaiser
• When Kaiser goes to take your hand in his sometimes he does a little bow, throwing his arm over his stomach as he bows his head in front of you, his other hand reaching out for you to grab. And of course he has to plant a kiss to your knuckles before continuing your walk with a smirk on his face, “Why thank you for the honor, m’lady.”
ᰔᩚ Oliver Aiku
(Silly Oliver is my Roman Empire)
• When he’s absolutely positive that it’s just the two of you and there’s absolutely no one around, he will talk to you in the cutest silliest baby voice. “Baby, can we take a bath togeder pwease?” Need you to rwub my poor muscles, owchie they hurwt so bad :(“ it’s become a joke between you two but when you laugh him off he sticks to the bit, “why are you waughing at meeee? you so mean. Pwetty pwease?”
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Please give me more requests for headcanons I had so much fun with this !!
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#blue lock headcanons#bllk x reader#blue lock#blue lock fanfiction#blue lock x reader#bllk imagines#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#bllk fluff#bllk smut#oliver aiku x reader#isagi yoichi x reader#meguru bachira x reader#rensuke kunigami x reader#michael kaiser x reader#nagi seishiro x reader#mikage reo x reader#rin itoshi x reader#sae itoshi x reader
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Can I please get the aftermath of a fight with Hotch? Maybe they’re both stressed after a particular case and things got a little heated?
ty for requesting !! fem, 1k
You hate when Hotch shouts.
Morose, you lay in a slouch on the couch with your hand between your face and the armrest, knuckles aching from the pressure. You’re attempting to self soothe, but your misery is worsened by your own ministrations, your thumb a useless thing on your cheek. You can’t do it like Hotch can. There’s no second meaning.
You assume him to be in the kitchen where you left him.
Nobody likes to fight, but you think you might be the most unwilling participant for any argument with him. He’s patient, and mellow-headed the majority of the time, so when he does get heated you can’t help thinking you’ve done something really awful.
You get the worst of worries sitting there. That you’re too much effort for him, that you don’t fit. That he’s going to realise these things and cut you loose.
Your tears are lazy. Your shoulders shudder with your breathing, but there isn't a sound to them, just heat where they well at the corner of your eye and drip over your nose. You sniffle, pressing the back of your hand to your top lip.
It’s cold in the living room. Immediately hotter when Hotch sits down beside you. You lift your head on instinct, surprised at his sudden presence, tears jolting down your cheeks like flash floods. When you realise it’s him and what you’re doing, you turn your face back to the armrest with held breath.
He hesitates for a moment.
“Please don’t be mad at me,” you mumble.
He drapes himself over your contorted frame. Arm weaving under your stomach, face pressing firmly to the nape of your neck, his right hand on your shoulder. “Don’t cry,” he says, hand working into your tense shoulder blade lovingly, his thumb drawing lines. “Don’t cry.”
“Are you still angry?”
“No,” he says, his voice ladened with a light sincerity, “I’m not angry.”
You feel like he’s holding back. Upset again, you attempt to find his hand where it’s cupping the space just below your chest and hold it weakly, smaller fingers on his, looking for a better forgiveness. It doesn’t come. You cry so much it starts to make you feel sick, and concern your weary partner, his frown getting deeper where it’s pressed to your neck.
“I’m not mad,” he says quietly. “I’m sorry for yelling, honey, is that what’s upset you?”
You just hate the idea that he could feel against you. It’s like a mixture of regret, anger, and now frustration, because you hadn’t wanted to cry at all, much less be comforted. Although, admittedly, the comforting is holding you together.
“Come on,” he says, kissing your cheek between words, “let’s sit up before you hurt your back.”
He sits back and pulls at your arm until you're sitting upright on the sofa. Your gaze falls to your legs, your hand curled uselessly on your thigh, your tears slowly pooling and falling in succession. You scrunch your face up as another wave of misery hits you.
“I’m s-sorry,” you say.
“For what?” he asks, far less emotional than you, and yet not completely stony, either.
“I didn’t mean to cry.” You bring your hand to your face to wipe at your tears and runny nose, irked, not wanting him to see you.
“It’s okay,” he murmurs.
Hotch leans down to kiss your shoulder, which works to calm you down. Another kiss to your neck and your horrible cloud of emotion starts to clear.
He can’t hate you if he’s kissing you.
“I’m sorry I made it a fight,” Hotch says, “I never would have if I thought you’d get this upset.”
“We can’t not fight just because I might cry.”
“That’s exactly why we shouldn’t. I never want to make you cry.”
“I hate when you–” You cut yourself off, the confession sure to make you look small.
“What?” he prompts gently.
“I hate when you yell because– because you never do.”
He’d only raised his voice for a few words, and it hadn’t been to your discredit, he’d been telling you to leave it alone. Perhaps if he’d been insulting you it would make sense for you to cry this much, but yelling is part of any argument. You can’t work out why it’s affected you.
“I feel so stupid,” you confess.
“I’m sorry, honey,” he says, wrapping his arm behind your back to pull you flush to his side, “I don’t know how it got so out of hand. You’re never stupid, I’m just stubborn. I shouldn’t shout.”
You twist to be facing him. He frowns at your wet cheeks.
“Do you want to kiss and make up?” you ask tentatively.
Hotch doesn’t roll his eyes or laugh at your question —he can tell you’re being serious. “Can we?” he asks, cupping your cheek in his hand.
He rubs a loving line into the side of your face, and every tight string in you is cut. You kiss him quickly, worried it’ll be a bad one, but find yourself encouraged for a longer one by his hand, your eyes squeezed closed in stress relaxing the longer it goes on. He’s gentle with you, his lips parting atop yours.
He pulls away. You hide your face in the curve of his neck.
“Can you forgive me for being cruel?” he asks quietly.
“You’re not cruel, Aaron. I hate being on a different side from you, that’s all.”
His first name makes all the difference to him. He sneaks a couple of kisses into your temple and begins to relax as you have, two sad lumps on the couch who only want the comfort of the other.
You rub loving lines up and down his side, finally feeling better as he breathes his own sigh of relief.
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner blurb#aaron hotchner drabble#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner fanfic#aaron hotchner fanfiction#hotch x reader#hotch#hotch x you#hotch blurb#hotch drabble#criminal minds
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Hey! Love your writing and love Flux!! I was hoping to request a kind of angsty/fluffy fic with the worst!wolverine where the meet her in the void and maybe Logan knew her just not very well and he’s finally letting himself open up and be close with her (likewise with reader/flux towards logan) and they get into an argument or maybe logan has a nightmare and he ends up stabbing her with his claws and maybe the aftermath of him beating himself up and sabotaging the new relationship until reader finally snaps him out of it and says it was an accident and she still loves him?? Thanks!!
mistake
Logan Howlett x fem!reader
a/n: I want to thank you for this request because I've been having the worst writer's block in the world. I was worried about having to go into another unofficial hiatus, but this made something in my brain click together and I knocked it out in two hours. my life is yours 🙏🙏 Summary: You know him. Or, you knew him. And you never blamed him for what happened in your world. It wasn't his fault that everyone you loved died and you barely escaped with your life. But you never actually thought you'd have to see him again. You don't know what to do when all these feelings resurface with his appearance.
No one truly knew who you were back in your universe. After the horrific incident at the mansion, you had run. You’d run as fast and as far as you could from the slaughter of your friends. You’d barely escaped with your life, and from the amount of blood and gore they’d left behind, most people just assumed you were dead.
It’s not like anyone cared about you. Scott, Ororo, and Jean had been the real heroes. But it didn’t matter because they were still mutants at the end of the day. It didn’t matter how many people they saved. How many lives they positively changed, no one would ever see past the fact that they were mutants.
Being one of the newer members of the recently disbanded X-Men gave you enough anonymity to get through daily life without being recognized. It did not, however, protect you from being sucked into the shit fest that is the multiverse.
You’re not sure what it is about you that just attracts bad luck. You don’t know if it’s some hidden power that’s a part of your evolution. You’re just apparently perpetually fucked. The TVA had determined that you were interfering with the proper flow of your timeline or some bullshit.
Now you’re here. Stuck in the void with nothing but decay and drunk former superheroes. If you have to watch one more Captain America ‘rally the troops’ you’re gonna kill him yourself. You’ve considered switching teams and joining Cassandra Nova at times. If only so you don’t have to deal with Johnny Storm and the rest of the dipshits.
You get along with Laura, at least. She likes to tell you about her Logan and you like to dodge her questions about yours. She doesn’t need to know that not every version of Wolverine has a golden heart and story worthy of tears. Yours was a fuck up, plain and simple, but you never thought the incident was his fault.
As much as others tried to push the blame on him. The people who raided the mansion were determined. There was no other way that day was going to end up. You’d just have one less X-Man. But people always love a martyr more than a victim.
After a couple of years, you get used to the monotony. Your days are only occasionally broken up by dodging Cassandra’s henchmen and trying not to get sucked up into the soul destroyer. Other than that, you spend your nights getting drunk with Gambit and pretending you know whatever the fuck he’s talking about.
“Laura! I managed to find some chocolate!” You run into the hideout looking for the girl. It’s rare to find good food that isn’t already a month past its expiration date. You weren’t planning on sharing the candy with her but you figured she’d smell it on you and it’s not worth the fight.
Instead, you stop short as the familiar blue and yellow uniform you’d always try to force on him comes into view. He’s stealing Gambit’s liquor and you know that’s not going to go over well. What you don’t know is why you are so sure that this is your Wolverine.
You’ve never had a Wolverine in the void. Not once. This could be any one of the hundreds of thousands of variants. But you see that look in his eye. That familiar watery gaze shows just how much he hurts, even if he doesn’t want to admit it.
“Logan?” You breathe his name out in disbelief. Bypassing the Deadpool standing nearby. You’ve dealt with enough of those in your time down here. He takes a step back, fixing you with a distrusting look.
He keeps the bottle of alcohol clutched close to his chest like he thinks you’re going to take it. You track the movement and you scoff. “Right,” you shake your head and stop short. “Of course, the only thing you care about is still getting fucking drunk.”
He glares at you, taking a step forward like he thinks it might actually intimidate you. “Do I know you, bub?” He reaches forward, probably to jab his finger in your chest. You drop your gaze to his outstretched hand and narrow your eyes.
The material of his suit fluctuates, pulling back and rippling over his arms like liquid and not spandex. He doesn’t notice the manipulation of matter until it's his skin you target. It melts off his adamantium bones and he stares down in horror.
You know he's scared because he’s watching his body dissolve but he’s not feeling any pain. You could make it hurt, but that’s not what you want. You just want to see if he’ll remember you now. If there’s anything half-decent left in that alcohol-rotted brain of his.
“Flux,” he grits your X-Man name out through his teeth like it hurts him to say it.
You nod and his skin and suit go back to normal, like you’d never tampered with it in the first place. “You do remember me, then?”
“Thought you fucking died with the rest of them.” Your face drops before you feel an astonished smile on your face.
“You know, it’s a comfort to know nothing about my world has changed. You’re still the same spineless dick that left us all to die.” You shake your head and storm out of the hideout. You don’t know how long they’re planning on staying but you pray they leave soon. If you have to deal with him longer than a week, you’ll just kill him.
You step outside just as Laura’s coming back from the bonfire. She greets you with a stiff smile and you wonder what’s got in her in a mood. It only takes a glance over her shoulder to find the reason.
Logan is sulking by the fire, nursing yet another bottle of whiskey. He’s drinking it like water and even with his healing, his liver should have turned to mush by now. “I can see why you didn’t tell me about him,” she mutters as she passes by you.
You know she tried to be quiet but you can see the way Logan’s head tilts slightly towards you. He’s heard her and you know it has to sting just a little.
You glance down at the leaves under your feet, eyes glazing over as you feel the guilt sink into your stomach. You shouldn’t feel bad, you didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t hurt him, technically, just reminded him who you were. But you still feel bad for what you said.
You’ve never blamed Logan for what happened. And if you did, you would be a hypocrite. Because you survived too, and you left them all behind. You ran like a coward. You could never blame him when you failed to save them just the same.
You take in a deep breath and steel yourself. You’ll just apologize, walk over there, and explain to him you didn’t mean what you said. You know he’ll be a dick about it. Claiming he doesn’t want your apology. You’ll just leave him alone after.
You’re about to step forward when he barks out a gruff command, “Don’t fucking stare at me like that. I don’t want your company.” He turns back to the fire and takes another swig from his bottle.
You roll your eyes and walk towards him. “You can be as miserable and self-pitying as you want, just let me say one thing.”
His head whips towards you so quickly you’re surprised you don’t hear it snap. “I’m not fucking pitying myself,” he grits out. You quirk your brows in amusement, glancing towards the bottle in his hand and the clear way he’s sulking. He turns his attention back towards the fire, intent on ignoring you again.
“I don’t blame you for what happened,” you tell him. You ignore the warning look he shoots you, taking a seat beside him even if he doesn’t want you to. “I-” you choke on the words, struggling to admit to yourself what you’ve never wanted to.
“Don’t.” You know it’s meant to be a warning. But when you look at him and see how completely broken he is, it sounds more like a pathetic plead.
But you need to say this. As selfish as it is, you need to say this to someone., Need to unload this guilt you’ve carried for so long. “I was there, Logan. I could have saved them and I didn’t. I fucking ran.”
“Kid, don’t do this-”
“Jean was still moving,” you blurt out. You feel the way your heart speeds up at the admission. Your fingers shake and the air around you stills.
His face drops and he slowly turns towards you. You’re afraid to look at him. You feel like a bunny staring down the snout of a wolf, there’s no escaping this. You’ve created this trap for yourself.
“What?” He demands. His voice has lost that tremor of vulnerability. Instead, he sounds like he did when he first found out what had happened to you all. That same deadly level of calm that makes you want to bolt again.
“She,” you stare into the fire until your eyes burn. You don’t know if it’s from the light or the smoke but the pain focuses you. “She was shaking on the floor. There was blood everywhere and she could barely breathe. They had gassed us with something. None of us could use our powers, it’s the only reason they got a one-up on us.”
You can feel yourself slipping back into that moment. You feel the warmth of the blood on your skin. It seeps into your suit and makes the material cling to you. Your gut is split open and the only thing holding your intestines in is your hands.
Jean is in front of you. Her hands are twitching by her sides. There’s blood pouring out of her lips, dribbling down her tongue and cheeks. Every breath is a rattle so deep you feel it in your bones.
Each inhale sounds like someone dragging glass through the membrane of her lungs. Her chest rises and sinks shallowly as she gasps for air. She’s practically convulsing, eyes twitching every which way.
The gas has faded from the halls. The people have left, satisfied with the carnage. You’re alone, surrounded only by the blood and bodies of your friends. None of the others are moving. Some of them are so mangled you can’t even tell who they are anymore.
Jean’s eyes lock onto yours. The only anchor she has. And you can see it, the frantic, wounded animal gaze on her face. She knows she’s dying. She knows there’s nothing she can do about it.
You can only stand by and watch as your friend dies. You could be her comfort. You could be the last face she sees before she dies, distracting her from the sight of her dead fiancee behind her.
But what do you do?
You hold your guts in your stomach and you run. You can’t look at her. You can’t look at any of them. You can hear her croaking behind you. And even when you’re out of the mansion, when you’re in a hospital somewhere getting repaired and Logan’s on a rampage, you still hear her.
You feel something heavy on your arm and it’s like you're being forcibly dragged out of a trance. Logan’s looking at you with something you’ve never seen before. But it’s something you’ve always desperately craved.
It’s like he’s seeing you, really seeing you. For the first time in a long time, you feel that ache of guilt ease away ever so slightly. It doesn’t disappear, but you’re sharing the burden with someone else and it’s a relief you’ve desperately craved.
“You’re not a bad person for leaving, kid.” He swallows roughly and you place your hand over his. He doesn’t look completely comfortable with the touch, slightly flinching away from it, but he doesn’t move. “If you hadn’t, you would be dead.”
You squeeze his hand, forcing him to meet your gaze. “I never blamed you for what happened.” emotion is so thick on your tongue and in your throat that the words come out a whisper. “Their deaths weren’t your fault, and what happened after wasn’t.”
He clenches his eyes shut and jerks his hand out of your grip. You sigh, knowing you’ve lost him. “I slaughtered them.”
You scoff, “They slaughtered us!” You nearly shout, anger bubbling hot in your gut. When you heard about him killing those who had hunted down your friends, you’d celebrated. And when you heard the way the public was crucifying him, you realized that no matter what you did they would never love you.
You would always be nothing more than a mutant to them.
“And the people who didn’t hurt them? The innocents I killed?”
You don’t have anything to say to that. You just stand up, placing a hand on his shoulder as you pass by him. “I never blamed you, Logan.”
You don’t see Logan again after that. At least, not while you’re in the void. What was left of your little resistance was sucked up into the purple cloud of death. Only you and Laura are left with the carnage.
Logan and Wade have disappeared to who knows where. It stings, to be on your own again. Sure, you have Laura, but she’ll never understand the pain of what happened to your universe.
As much as it hurt, at least with Logan, you had someone to share the pain with. You could share your burden with him. You feel lonely and cold. Like there’s a part of you missing. You finally figure out what that ache is when the TVA comes to collect you and you see him again.
He’s standing behind Wade as he enthusiastically tells you and Larua all about his world. But you can’t take your eyes off Logan, or the tentative smile on his face. Whatever had happened during that fight with Cassandra Nova had changed him, for the better.
You smile back at him and it feels like taking a breath of fresh air after years.
Apparently, whoever this world’s Flux had been, she was fucking insanely rich. And dead, which sucked for her but was great for you and Logan.
It’s not hard for you to fake some government identities and explain that you’d been mistakenly marked as dead. It’s apparently pretty common in this universe. Superheroes are blipped out of existence all the time. You couldn’t get all of her assets as some had been liquidated, but you did get her giant ass house.
You let Logan and Laura stay with you until they decide where they want to go. It’s better than living with Wade and his coke-fiend roommate. Laura finds her groove pretty quickly, it is her world after all. But you and Logan struggle to figure out what to do with yourselves.
Neither of you has an interest in being X-Men again, and it seems like they’re not incredibly present in this world either. You also hadn’t been the best of friends, even before everything went wrong, back home.
You’re not strangers, you’re not friends, you’re that awkward place in between. Each day is another opportunity to get to know each other. The progress might be slow, but you know that you’re getting closer to something real.
It’s why you don’t feel any qualms about running into his room when you hear him shouting. You burst into his room and the door slamming against the wall isn’t even enough to wake him up.
He’s writhing around in the bed, sheets twisted around his waist while sweat beads down his forehead. The noises he’s making remind you of a wounded animal. There’s something heartbreaking about this.
He doesn’t get peace even when he’s sleeping. It makes you hurt for him. You want to smooth over the aches and pains he carries and burden yourself with them.
The thought snaps you out of your reverie and you’re shocked by the revelation. You’d been growing closer to him, but you hadn’t thought you were growing this close. You feel so strongly for him, but you’re not ready to put a name on what it is that you feel for him. You just know that right now you want to make him feel better.
You approach the bed cautiously, taking a seat beside him. The bed ripples and jolts underneath you as he tosses and turns. You place a gentle hand on his arm and shake, “Logan,” you whisper. You don’t want to startle him too bad.
But he’s not responding to anything. It doesn’t matter how much you shake him or call out his name. Finally, you can’t handle it anymore. You get on your knees, sitting over him and bringing your palm down across his face as hard as you can.
In a second he’s shooting up. You don’t even notice his hand until you see the way his vision clears. The visceral panic fades and something is aching in your gut. “Oh god, no no no,” he says the word so many times it stops sounding real.
You look down and see the blood dribbling down his palm, the claws buried in your stomach. It’s almost funny, how perfectly aligned they are with the scar that already lived there. The reminder of your friend’s death being erased and reformed by Logan’s hand.
He pulls his wrist back and you quickly snatch it up. “Don’t!” You shout, jaw clenching against the pain. “Don’t pull them out, I’ll just bleed out.”
“What the fuck am I supposed to do?” You know he’s worried, that’s why he snaps at you. But it doesn’t help the way you feel yourself fighting back tears.
He sees them drip down your cheeks and his face drops. His other hand, the one not in you, comes up and cradles your cheek. “What do I do?” He whispers, and he sounds more desperate than you do.
You know he doesn’t want another death on his hands. But there’s something beyond that. He doesn’t want to be the reason you stop breathing. There’s a startling clarity when you’re slowly dying.
He cares about you. Just as deeply as you do for him. You can’t make him go through this pain again. Can’t let him suffer alone, not when he’s made so much progress. “Slowly,” you tell him, guiding his claws out inch by inch.
It’s hard not to black out. You’d barely felt it when he’d gotten you the first time. You think it’s because of how fast and sudden it was. But this, having them oh so slowly slicing through your insides is the worst form of torture.
But you don’t heal like him. You have to close your eyes, focus on the pain, and forcibly reknit your skin back together. It’s a clever manipulation of your powers, but it’s a slow one. You could never take serious damage on the field because you wouldn’t be fast enough to repair yourself.
This is easy to repair. But that doesn’t make it hurt less. It feels like an hour before he can safely draw them the rest of the way out. The second he does, you’re sinking into his arms with a pained sob.
He clutches you so tightly to his chest you worry your back might snap. He keeps muttering apologies into your hair, hands desperately grasping at every inch of you he can hold. You’re too tired to say anything.
You realized you should have. You should have told him you don’t blame him. You were the one who snuck into his room. You should have been smarter. But it doesn’t matter how many times you tell Logan not to blame himself, he always will. And you were too tired to try anyway.
You only realize what’s happening two days after the incident. You figured he might need some space to process what happened. And honestly, you did too. It was awful and incredibly draining. You’ve felt fatigued ever since.
But when you try and approach him and he just brushes past you like you weren’t even there, you know something is wrong. You watch his retreating back with a disturbed glare. You connect the dots quickly, already knowing what he’s doing.
He doesn’t want to be responsible for hurting another person he loves. He can’t handle a loss like that again, even if it’s not by his hands. He wants to make sure you don’t want him, that you don’t care for him. Like that might ease the pain and guilt.
But it wouldn’t. It would just make him feel worse. It would make you feel worse.
You don’t waste a second, following him up the stairs and barging into his room before he can slam the door shut. It bounces off the wall and he lets out a deeply irritated sigh. He doesn’t turn to look at you, just walks over to his nightstand and rummages around through the doors.
You know he’s not looking for anything. He’s just trying to ignore you long enough for you to give up. It’s not going to happen, he should know better.
You take a step further into the room and the smell of chemicals slams into you. Your nose wrinkles in disgust. It smells like he pumped Lysol into the vents. Your eyes dart to the bed and you sigh.
Your blood, you’d completely forgotten. He must have been cleaning it up the morning after. You can’t blame him for wanting to get rid of the remainder. But this seems excessive.
“Strong nose,” he mutters. You hadn’t realized you’d spoken aloud and you glanced over at him. “I can still smell it, even after cleaning.” He takes a seat on the bed and you hate the way his shoulders are slumped.
He’d seemed so much more comfortable with himself lately. It’s like one accident has undone all his progress. “Logan,” you start, taking a step towards him. He holds his hand up, still not looking at you.
It’s driving you insane. You wish he would just meet your eyes. You feel like you could change his mind if he would just see you. Maybe that’s why he won’t. He won’t let himself be happy.
“Look, that night just made me realize what a huge fucking mistake this was.” He gets up and slides something out from under the bed. It takes a moment for you to register what it is. A duffel bag, packed with all his essentials and what little clothes he owns.
He’s going to leave.
You act without thinking. Pure panic making your powers surge out. Logan grunts and the bag falls out of his hand. “Quit it,” he snipes, bending over to pick it up. But he can’t because it’s so heavy it’s making the wooden floor splinter and crack under its weight.
“You don’t get to just leave when things get hard, Logan.”
He stands up, hands propped on his sides. There’s a challenge in his eyes that makes you nervous. “Fuck this,” he scoffs and brushes past you.
It’s beyond manipulative to use your powers against him. But sometimes, someone is such a fucking idiot, they need a little outside help. You slam the door closed and the handle disappears, locking you both in his room.
He turns towards you with a fierce glare on his face. “Open the goddamn door before I break it down.”
“You can try,” you taunt, a nasty tone to your voice. You’re sick of this. You’re sick of running from what you want. You’ve been miserable and alone for years. You want to be happy. For the first time in forever, you want something.
And you want Logan to be happy with you. You can’t force him to feel the way you do. But you can stop him from actively preventing this. “Stop acting like a goddamn child and just talk to me!” You shout at him.
There’s a disbelieving look on your face. You don’t understand why he won’t let this happen. Why does he have to fight so hard against any semblance of happiness in his life?
“I’m going to hurt you. That is all I do. I hurt the people I love and I cannot hurt you too.” Your eyes widen in shock at his outburst. Beyond anger, there was so much fear in his voice it was almost enough to make you miss what he’d said.
“You love me?” You can see the realization dawn on him. The fact that he let slip why he’s so hesitant to be around you. You know he wants to leave, his eyes are darting around the room for an escape route, but you’ve blocked them all. You can’t let this go, not now.
“Logan,” you snap, demanding an answer from him.
“Fuck you,” he mutters, something vicious on his face.
He’s going to hurt you. He’s going to lash out and say something cruel so that this doesn’t happen. You know him because you’ve been him. He will take every possible route to get out of this if it means he doesn’t have to face his feelings.
You roll your eyes and take a step forward. You jerk him towards you and throw yourself on him before he can say something stupid. The kiss is brief, just enough to snap him out of this ridiculous headspace he’s in.
When you pull back he looks dazed, but he’s relaxed in your hold, sinking towards you. You grin up at him, “I love you too, dumbass.” You lean up to kiss him again but you dart back at the last second, a mean glare on your face. “Pull some shit like this again and I’m going to melt your dick off.”
You kiss him before he can respond, but you feel the smile against your lips. You can taste the defeat on his tongue as he wraps his arms around you and tugs you into his chest. He’s not going to push you away and you’re not going to let him.
end. — I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
General Taglist: @evasmlp
Logan Taglist: @nonamevenus @smexy-bucky-waifu @wh1sp @peony-always @corvusmorte
@mrs-ephemeral @wolviesgirl @allllium ♡
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett#the worst logan x reader#wolverine x reader#wolverine x you#wolverine imagine#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#hugh jackman#hugh jackman x reader#anon
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DP x DC prompt [2]
Danyal returns to league, he was sent to the Fentons for a mission and after gathering all that they know about lazarus/ecto he figured he was in an unique position. Either he revealed himself and was accepted and after that would have to do what he could to keep the league off his back. Or he'd be rejected and he could simply finish his mission and return to the league. Sadly for Danny. The second option ended up happening, and with crushing disappointment and new hardened resolve he made his way back to Nanda Parbat.
At first he's surprisingly at peace with the situation, he misses his friends and Jazz but this is sadly how it's meant to be.
Damian isn't there, he has been sent to train under their biological father. Or at least what mother says. Perhaps now that he's successfully finished his deep undercover mission he'll be allowed to know the truth and go as well.
Ra's doesn't want that, for body snatching reasons. But he doesn't know that Danny is half dead. Nobody at the league does.
It's basically the only secret Danny keeps. After having to stay quiet about it and the explosive aftermath with the Fentons it just doesn't occur to him to speak up about it anymore. After all, here he has everything to lose.
And he feels vindicated when he finds Respawn. Tied up, hanging, looking so much like him and Dami, but wounded, with damning white hair and when he opens his eyes and notices Danny it's only the green green green he sees.
In Danny's mind the league must know, they are bidding their time or... or Danny was always meant to end up like he did or this is yet another damn clone someone made of him.
None of Danny's thoughts about this are good, and it figures, he's aware of what this place is. Jazz did a good job deprogramming him. So perhaps the thought that things would be better here was laughable. But somehow, for some reason he thought blood relation meant something.
So far all parental figures are bad, the Fentons. Vlad, now Ra's and Talia. So what does that mean for his twin, what does this mean for Damian?
Well, at the very least finding out who his biological father is and where he lives isn't hard with ghost powers. Neither is freeing Respawn.
And after that all that's left to do is making sure Damian is safe.
And by the ancients, may the gods help Batman if it turns out he's not.
#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc#dc x dp#Danny Fenton#Danny Phantom#league of assassins#respawn dc#Damian Wayne#just boys finding a place to belong#and adults unable to stop being massive disappointments#bad Fentons#I bet Respawn will be like “why should i trust you”#and then Danny transforms#Respawn with the surprised pikachu face#will Slade find the two boys first or will they get to Damian first#i dunno
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Now That We Don't Talk
Part I
Now That We Don’t Talk - Azriel x Reader
Summary: Dealing with the aftermath of your mate’s betrayal.
Warnings: major angst, mentions of grief and loss, mention of infidelity
a/n: this has a happy ending, I promise! I’d also like to mention that I never usually blame the woman when a man cheats, but in this case, both parties knew of the existing relationship and bond so *death to all of them* lol jk…for now…I hope this lives up to your expectations!
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“That’s it, Y/n,” Madja said, taking a step backwards as she carefully monitored you between two support beams. “Go slow.”
Your shoulders and arms were straining as you held yourself up using the two beams, slowly raising your foot to take another step forward. You groaned at the pain, feeling flustered and embarrassed that walking was taking you so much effort.
Cassian and Nesta had turned one of the larger chambers in the House of Wind into a physical remedial room. You had sessions in here every day with Madja, Cassian almost always there with you and in times he couldn’t be, Rhys would fly up to be with you during these.
You didn’t have the heart to tell your brother that you preferred when Rhys was here instead of him, only because he always magicked his wings away so you didn’t have to see them. Cassian’s were just a reminder of what you had lost.
Relearning to walk has been one of the hardest parts of losing your wings.
Even now it was a struggle to simply stand. You were too used to the weight of having wings on your back and using them to balance. You felt their absence in more ways than one.
But this one was easier to deal with—the physical part. It was the mental and emotional part that still kept you up at night. The loss of freedom, having to know you’d never be able to fly again. The nightmares. The embarrassment. The shame.
You had never been a particularly proud Illyrian, never agreeing with the way your people were raised and the culture they lived in. But still, having those wings made you a part of something bigger than yourself—a community, a tribe, a family.
You weren’t like Rhys, not a half-breed like him. You didn’t have the pointy ears to make you fit in with the wingless High Fae. You’d always be other to them. And now you’d be other to your people as well.
You tried to blink away the tears forming in your eyes but it didn’t matter. Your brother seemed to sense the change in your mood and rose from his chair in the corner where he had been monitoring the session.
“You’re doing great, kiddo,” Cassian said, trying to encourage you to keep trying. “One step at a time.”
“I can’t,” you choked out, your muscles straining from the effort to keep you upright. “I-I can’t.”
“You can and you will,” Cassian said, sternly. “Come on, I know you can do it.”
“I can’t.”
You wobbled, letting out a long exhale. You had only made it halfway to the other side of the mat. Pain pierced through your still healing back, serving as another reminder of what you had lost. Your fractured hip had healed already but the bones still felt like they were being grinded together every time you moved your legs.
“Thank you for your help today, Madja,” Cassian said, sharing a look with the older healer. “I can take it from here.”
Madja, as if also sensing the shift in the atmosphere, took her leave without argument to give you some privacy with your brother.
“Just make sure she eats something after this. Her body needs more nourishment,” Madja said on her way out. The noise of the door shutting behind her was all it took for the hold on your emotions to completely crumble.
You felt your legs give out as a cry escape from your throat. Cassian darted forward, catching you only just before you hit the ground. He slowly lowered you the rest of the way, going with you to hold you in a tight embrace as sobs racked your body.
“I-I can’t do this, Cass,” you cried over and over again. “I can’t do this.”
He knew you weren’t just talking about walking.
Every intake of breath reminded you of the heavy weight of your heart in your chest. It was unbearable, all consuming. The heartache, the pain, the feeling of the mating bond still lingering in the background of it all. You wanted to rip your heart out, wanted to scream and scream but all that came out were inaudible words and sobs.
“It’s going to be okay, sweetheart,” Cassian murmured, petting your hair on the back of your head. “I promise you.”
“My wings, Cass, m-my wings are gone,” you choked out, tears streaming down your face.
Cassian cradled your head in his neck, pulling you tighter against him. His own body was tense and you knew he was holding back his own emotions, trying to be strong for you. “I know, kiddo, I know.”
“M-my wings,” you cried. “My wings. I-I want them back, Cass. P-please, I want them back!”
“I would cut off my own wings and give them to you if I could, sweetheart,” Cassian whispered, his voice filled with despair. “I’m so sorry.”
He couldn’t understand this feeling, would never unless he too lost his wings. You remembered when he almost had after protecting Azriel in Hybern from the blast of the Cauldron. Azriel…Just thinking of his name was making you spiral further, choking on your own sobs.
There had once been a time when Azriel had been the one to save your wings. And now he was part of the reason why you lost them. You weren’t even sure which hurt more at this point. His betrayal or the loss of your wings.
Both felt so violating.
A piece of you, of your body, ripped away along with your trust and heart. Your mate sleeping with another female and coming home to you. Looking you in the eyes and keeping that secret from you each and every day. Making love to you knowing he was sharing himself with another behind your back. How were you supposed to move on?
It didn’t help that you weren’t fully rid of Azriel. The bond was still an unwelcomed presence inside of you, still sang his name–called for him–despite the hurt he had caused you. You wanted to tear it to shreds.
“Why?” You cried, wrapping your arms around Cassian’s neck to fall into him further. Your brother held you as tight as he could, stroking your hair, whispering words of support in your ear. “Why wasn’t I g-good enough, Cass? W-why wasn’t I enough for him? What is wrong with m-me?”
The guttural wails that came from you caused Cassian to squeeze his eyes shut, trying to keep his own tears at bay. Your chest heaved as you struggled to even breath under the crushing anguish that was consuming you. He held you as you shook, held you as your tears soaked through his shirt, held you as he restrained himself from shooting off to go find Azriel and kill him.
“There is nothing wrong with you, sweetheart. Nothing,” Cassian growled. “Azriel is a fool for losing you. He’s the fuck-up. Not you.”
“He is my mate, Cass, my mate. And he–he did this to me. Why?”
“Because he’s a miserable bastard who doesn’t know how to love,” Cassian growled.
You couldn’t even register his words over the pounding of your own wailing heart. “What did I do to deserve this?”
You felt so violated, so vulnerable, so completely and utterly shattered. The pain of your broken heart seemed to echo in the depths of your very soul. Why hadn’t you been enough for him?
Was Elain just that much better? Was she prettier, smarter, a better female? Could she give him something you couldn’t?
“You didn’t deserve this. You did nothing wrong,” Cassian murmured into your hair, kissing the top of your head. “You are so much better than them, sweetheart.”
“B-but then why wasn’t I enough?” Your cries met their crescendo, your hands shaking as you clung onto Cassian’s shirt with tight fists. “Why wasn’t I enough, Cass? Why?”
Your voice was hoarse, your words cracking as you spoke. But there was nothing left to say.
Nothing left to say at all.
You weren’t good enough for Azriel, for your own mate. You weren’t good enough to keep his attention. Not good enough to keep his love.
You were just simply not enough.
Cassian held you there as you cried and cried, held you as the weight of everything you lost engulfed you. Held you through the raw grief that surged like a tempest within you. Held you until you had cried yourself into a fitful sleep, only then rising to carry you back to your room.
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As soon as Mor had gotten word about what had happened, she immediately started her journey home from the continent. She had gone to you the minute she landed in Velaris, but Cassian had turned her away because he didn’t want to interrupt your sleep, something you hadn’t gotten much of since the attack.
But that was okay because she had a few things she needed to take care of.
“Where is she!”
Mor’s shout rang through the entire house, the ground quaking underneath her as she stormed into the dining room where a very morose dinner seemed to be taking place with Rhys, Feyre, Elain and Amren at the table. Rhys shot up from his seat. “Y/n is at the House of Wind with—”
“Not her,” Mor snarled before pointing a finger at Elain, who stared at her wide-eyed. “You.”
Before anyone could stop her, Mor launched herself forward, grabbing Elain by the hair on the back of her head and slamming her face down on the wooden table she was sitting at. Rhys cursed while Feyre jumped up from her seat, thanking the Gods that Nesta wasn’t here for this.
Rhys grabbed Feyre by the arm, shaking his head at her. “Some things need to be fought the fae way. Let her learn.”
Amren leaned back in her chair, not so much as flinching at the display.
Mor kept her fist wrapped in Elain’s hair, pressing her face against the hardwood as the other girl cried out, blood dripping down her nose.
“That was for Y/n because she’s up there learning how to fucking walk again because of you,” Mor hissed before yanking Elain up by her hair until she was standing.
Elain cried out for Feyre but her sister just pressed her lips into a thin line, Rhys’s hand still around her arm. Feyre was disappointed in her sister for what she had done but she still bristled as Rhys’s amusement at the scene traveled down their bond.
Mor decked Elain in the face, the sound audible, causing Feyre to flinch. Elain’s head whipped to the side as she dropped to the floor with a loud sob. “And that was for Cassian because he would never lay his hands on a weak, pathetic female but I will. Remember that.”
Elain’s cries rung out in the room, blood dripping from her now broken nose and a bruise already forming on her cheek. Mor ignored her as she looked to Rhysand.
“Where is the other one?” Her voice was full of anger. “I’m going to fucking kill him.”
“I don’t know,” Rhys sighed, finally letting go of Feyre. She rushed to Elain’s side, helping her off the floor and out of the room, giving Mor a remorseful look, feeling guilty over what her sister had caused.
“What do you mean you don’t know?”
“He disappeared once Y/n woke up and made it very clear she didn’t wish to see him. I have no idea where he went.”
“That fucking coward,” Mor grumbled. “Why is Elain still here? This is Y/n’s home, not hers. She shouldn’t have to be the one who leaves and you know she will if those two are still around. Cassian would leave with her too—I’m sure of it.”
“I know he would,” Rhys said, sitting back down and putting his head in his hands. “I don’t know what to do, Mor. If Elain wasn’t Feyre’s sister I would’ve had her banished in a second and Azriel…Gods, he’s my brother. I can’t believe he would do something like this. He loves Y/n. I don’t know why he would hurt her like this.”
“Azriel has always been his worst enemy,” Mor sighed, sitting next to Rhys. “We’ve all tried to help him as much as we could but this just isn’t something we can help him with. Y/n is going to need our support. This could destroy her.”
“It already has,” Rhys replied. “She might leave our court regardless of whether or not we send Azriel and Elain away. I wouldn’t blame her. I’ve already let her know that if she wants out, I’ll have everything set-up for her.”
“What of the girl’s mate? The redhead,” Amren piped up, crossing her arms. “Does he know yet? You know how males are. He might call for a blood duel against Azriel.”
“Lucien has already been informed about what happened,” Rhys spoke. “Cassian has been on a warpath and was all too eager to tell Lucien. I think part of him hoped he would duel Azriel. But Lucien wouldn’t.”
“So what happens now?” Mor asked.
Rhys looked at her and she took note of the heavy bags under his eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping. Neither had she. She was certain none of them had. Azriel had caused a giant rift in this family—one felt by them all.
Rhys held back his tears, clearing his throat.
“I know what was to be done,” he breathed out. “But it’s going to be hard. He was…He was my brother for over five hundred years. Regardless of what he’s done, it’s going to be hard to say goodbye.”
Mor rested a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I know, Rhys. Nothing about this is going to be easy.”
“He cannot be trusted anymore,” Amren added. “Anyone who could cheat on their mate cannot be trusted. He might as well have spit on the Mother’s face for what he did.”
“I just want to know why. Why would he do this?”
Mor let out a long breath. “I’m not sure you’ll ever get an answer. I think Azriel, himself, can’t even answer that question.”
“I failed her, Mor. I knew how dangerous that mission was. I should’ve never given it to her,” the quiet cry shook Rhys’s body.
“Azriel was supposed to be with her, Rhys,” Mor said. “It’s not your fault. He failed her. This was his doing.”
But Rhys just shook his head, the tears finally slipping free from both of their eyes.
“Get it out now, Mor, before you see her,” Rhys choked out. “It’s…hard to see her in the state she’s in. Prepare yourself. We have to be strong for her.”
“I know,” Mor whispered, wiping at her tears. “I know.”
────────────
“Hey, kiddo,” Cassian’s voice pulled you from your sleep.
You blinked awake, groaning at the pounding in your head. It took you a second to realize you were in your room. Cassian must’ve carried you here after your breakdown yesterday.
Cassian was sitting beside you, stroking your hair. “I brought you some breakfast and someone is here to see you.”
It was only then you noticed the other person sitting at the end of your bed.
“Mor?” Your voice was hoarse, the word barely escaping. “You’re here?”
“I came back as soon as I heard,” Mor said, leaning forward to clutch your hand in hers. “How are you doing, babygirl?”
Mor had always felt like an older sister to you. Her friendship with your brother had made the two of you close.
“I’m…I’m not doing good,” you replied, honestly. “I can’t…I don’t know what to do, Mor. I don’t know how to move on from here. Part of me wishes I died in that alleyway. I wish I died the minute my wings were cut off.”
“I know,” she said, sadly. “I wish I had an answer for you but I don’t. It’s going to be hard, but we’re going to be with you every step of the way.”
“Come on, why don’t you sit up so you can eat,” Cassian murmured, putting a hand on your back to help you up.
“I’m not hungry,” you protested.
“You have to eat something, sweetheart,” Cass said gently. “Madja’s orders.”
But you shook your head. You didn’t have an appetite. Everything still hurt so much.
“Just give her a second, Cass,” Mor murmured.
Cassian frowned but nodded. He brushed some of your hair away from your face again and the soothing motion started another round of tears.
“Hey, hey,” Cassian whispered. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay, Cass! How will I ever be able to show my face again?” you cried. “I will be shamed, spit on, shunned because I lost my wings—because I couldn’t fight for them. I can never return to Illyria. I won’t be able to help train with the girls anymore.”
“Emerie told me the girls are already awaiting your return. They miss you,” Mor reassured. “Who cares about what the stupid males are going to think? Most of those females have had their freedom of flight taken from them. They would never shun you for what happened.”
Your eyes fell on the many bouquets of flowers and get well cards on your nightstand. Cassian had been bringing them to you. Your heart ached at the sight.
“But I failed them, Mor,” you sobbed. “I failed them. I’m supposed to be strong. I’m supposed to be a warrior and all it took was one male to completely destroy me. I’m worthless to them now. How can I teach them to fight for themselves if I cannot even do that?”
“You are not worthless,” Cassian said, sternly. “You are more of a fighter than half of those Illyrian males. You continue to fight each day knowing you have to live with the loss of your wings. Most of the males would’ve given up already, sweetheart. You are stronger than you think.”
“I-I’m not. I’m weak and a failure,” you cried. “I couldn’t protect my wings. Couldn’t keep my mate’s love. Couldn’t…couldn’t–”
Your sobs overtook your words, your entire body shaking.
“Listen to me, Y/n.” Mor demanded. “You are not weak. You are not a failure. You are a million times better than the two assholes who hurt you. You will survive this. You will survive him. I promise you, Y/n, I promise you.”
She embraced you, holding you as you broke down into gut-wrenching sobs once again.
────────────
The air was tense to say the least. Rhys was standing behind his desk, palms pressed flat against the surface as he stared at the two people sitting in front of him. Feyre stood next to him as both a pillar of support and the High Lady.
Azriel’s eyes were downcast. He hadn’t even looked at Elain since he had been dragged into this office by Mor—a new black eye and a bruised jaw decorating his face. Elain stared and stared at him, her eyes pleading with him to look at her but he ignored her presence.
Azriel looked rough. He hadn’t shaved, his eyes were bloodshot, but the most surprising thing was his lack of shadows swarming him.
“Where are you shadows?” Rhys asked. “I swear, Azriel, if you sent them after Y/n, I will bring Cassian down here to do with you as he pleases.”
Azriel looked up, shaking his head. “They won’t sing to me anymore. Not since…Not since the accident.”
It was true. His shadows had hissed at him, recoiled in his presence before they dissipated as if they too had felt his betrayal. They had wailed in agony at the loss of Y/n. They had always skittered away in Elain’s presence, probably the only reason they never yelled at him when he was with her…but it seems this time, they had left for good.
Despite his curiosity, Rhys decided to drop the subject. This was not the time or place for that discussion.
“Feyre and I have come to a decision about what must happen due to the results of your actions,” Rhys said, his voice full of authority and resignation.
“What? But we’ve done nothing wrong!” Elain exclaimed. “I know we shouldn’t have gone behind Y/n’s back but we’re in love!”
“I don’t care,” Rhys snarled, baring his teeth. “I don’t care how much you two claim to be in love! Azriel has caused irreparable damage to his own mate—a member of my court, of my family. And you were complicit in that.”
“Are we not your family too? Feyre is my sister!”
“And Y/n is mine,” Rhys retorted. “And Cassian’s.”
Elain crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. “So we’re being punished for falling in love? It’s not our fault the Cauldron decided to make someone else our mates. It was never our choice.”
“You’re not being punished for falling in love, if that’s even what we can call this,” Feyre spat out, staring at her sister with disappointment. “You’re being punished for how you handled a sensitive situation. You’re being punished for lying to our whole family and for causing it to be torn apart.”
“You’re not being punished at all,” Rhys snapped. “If you were, both of you would be in a cell in Hewn City and I’d let Cassian decide what your punishment would be considering Y/n would never have the heart to hurt either of you. This is simply the consequence of your own stupid actions.”
Azriel’s head shot up at the mention of your name. “How is Y/n? Is she doing okay?”
Feyre went to answer but Rhys shook his head at her.
“You don’t get the privilege of knowing anything about her at this point, Azriel,” he huffed.
Azriel stood from his chair in anger. “She is my mate, Rhys.”
“Sit down,” Rhys commanded, his voice rising for the first time since the meeting started. “Funny how now you acknowledge her as a mate but not when you had your tongue down Elain’s throat.”
“Fuck you, Rhys,” Azriel growled, but sat, unable to fight the power of a High Lord’s order.
“No fuck you, Azriel! I thought you were my brother! How could you do this to Y/n? To our family? Both of you should be ashamed. You are already getting off easy, don’t make me rethink my choice. Lucien has every right to storm in right now and demand a blood duel against you. And even though it’s not a practice in my court, I’d even let Y/n declare one against Elain.”
Elain’s face paled but Azriel only scoffed in indignation. “As if Feyre would ever let anyone kill one of her sisters.”
Feyre stepped forward, glaring at the shadowsinger and Elain. “I’m done protecting her. Nesta is done protecting her. We have spent our whole lives taking care of her thinking she was just too soft for this world—too naive and innocent. But I think we’re finally seeing the real you, Elain. And it is time for you to face the consequences of your own actions, make your own way in life.”
“So what are you going to do? Are you going to force me to live in the House of Wind like you did Nesta?”
“No,” Feyre said, stone faced before looking at Rhys. They had decided together how they would handle this situation.
“You are both hereby banished from the Night Court,” Rhys declared. “I will not tolerate Y/n having to lose her own home after she just lost her wings and we are going to do what's best for her. Lucien has made it clear that you both will not be welcomed in Day either and Helion is standing by his son’s decision. Beyond that, we cannot help you. You will pack your things and leave immediately. If you step one foot in this court after you leave, I will be notified and you will face worse repercussions.”
“What?” Elain exclaimed. “Feyre, you can’t be serious! Look, I’ll move out of the Riverhouse. We can live in Azriel’s apartment and avoid Y/n.”
“That apartment belongs to Y/n too, you know,” Feyre snapped. “We have already made our decision. We will not be negotiating any terms.”
“Rhys, come on,” Azriel said. “I will leave but you don’t need to banish Elain too. She did nothing wrong.”
“Elain knew you were a mated male, knew you were together with Y/n. While I agree that what you have done is worse, she still knew what she was doing wasn’t right.”
“Where are we supposed to go?” Elain cried. “I don’t have any money. I don’t have anywhere to go, Feyre. You can’t just toss me out like this.”
“Azriel has money,” Feyre shrugged. “I guess you’re his problem now.”
“You know none of the other High Lord’s will want me in their courts, Rhys,” Azriel snarled. “Not after the things I’ve done for you.”
“Should of thought of that before you betrayed our whole family.”
“I hear the old Manor is still abandoned in the human lands,” Feyre remarked. “Since Vassa had reclaimed her territory with Jurian at her side and Lucien had moved to Day to be with his father.”
“We can’t survive there,” Elain sobbed. “Humans hate faeries.”
“Not my problem, Elain,” Feyre said. “You’re not my problem anymore.”
“Azriel, do something!” Elain cried, looking at the shadowsinger.
“What do you expect him to do?” Rhys laughed humorlessly. “He no longer has his title, his place in my court. He has no sway here. You both don’t. You will not change our minds.”
“Nesta won’t allow this!”
“Nesta,” Feyre said, “is packing up your things as we speak.”
Elain fell back in her chair, crying.
“I’d say I wish you two the best, but I don’t,” Rhys said. “You have two hours to sort out whatever you have to before I expect you both to be out of my court. Two hours. Do you understand?”
“Please,” Elain begged. “Please don’t do this, Feyre.”
But Feyre only shook her head at her sister. “There’s no going back for either of you. Say your goodbyes, sort out your affairs, but you will leave in two hours.”
Rhys took his leave after that, giving Azriel one last look that was full of disgust, guilt, regret, sadness. One last look at his brother before striding out of that room, never to see or speak to him again.
────────────
Mor had just left when you heard the flapping of wings approaching your balcony. Thinking it was your brother, you pushed yourself to stand and hobbled over to the balcony doors using the walls of your room for support. You opened the door, expecting to see your brother, but your heart stopped when you came face to face with Azriel.
Your eyes narrowed and you went to slam the door, but he grabbed it before you could.
“Please, please just hear me out,” he pleaded. “I will leave, I promise, I just…I just—please.”
“There is nothing you can say that will make me forgive you, Azriel.”
“I know, baby–”
“Don’t you dare call me that!”
Azriel looked down at his feet. “Okay, I’m sorry. I’m not here to try to earn your forgiveness, Y/n. I know I fucked up beyond repair. I know I failed you, failed us. Words will never be able to convey how much I regret everything.”
You crossed your arms, leaning against the doorframe as your legs threatened to give out. You were debating screaming out for Cassian.
Azriel reached into his pocket and pulled out a small stone that looked to be enchanted. He held it out towards you.
“I can’t…I can’t hear the shadows anymore,” he murmured. “But I can’t just leave you without some way to contact me. In case you ever change your mind, in case there is ever a chance that we can be together again. You’ll be able to call for me with this.”
“That is never going to happen.”
“Please, just take it,” Azriel begged. “Even if you don’t want me, please. If you’re ever in danger again and need help, you can use it for that too. Just please, take it.”
When you said nothing, didn’t so much as open your palm so he could place the stone in it, he knelt down and placed it at your feet instead. You stared at him, emotionless. You didn’t want to give him anything. He didn’t deserve your tears or your sadness.
“I’m so sorry, Y/n. I’m so sorry for the way things ended,” Azriel said. “You deserve a better mate than me. If I never…If I never get to see you again after this, I promise I will find you in the next life and the one after that. I will do right by you. I will give us another chance.”
He stared at you, pleading with you to say anything. Anything. Even if you screamed at him, beat him, cried—anything was better than this utter silence. But you didn’t. You merely looked at him like he was nothing to you. Like he was a stranger.
“Goodbye, Azriel,” you said. “I hope you find happiness in your life. Truly.”
And then you slammed the door shut and walked away.
And he knew then that your words would haunt him for the rest of his life because he knew he had lost the one real thing that had brought him true happiness forever.
────────────
One Year Later ~ Winter Solstice
“Get up, you lazy cow!”
The sheets were yanked off your sleeping body, exposing you to the cold morning air. You let out a shriek, cursing at your brother and trying to grab the sheets back.
“What the hell, Cassian!”
“It’s Winter Solstice!”
“It’s also six in the morning,” you retorted, falling back down on your bed.
“Nope, you’re not going back to sleep,” Cassian said. “It’s time to get up!”
Before you could even respond, Cassian grabbed you by the ankle and yanked you to the end of the bed. You squealed as he tossed you over his shoulder like a bag of potatoes, pounding on his back as he raced out of the room.
“Cassian! Let me down, you big brute!”
But he only laughed at you, carrying you all the way to the kitchen where Nesta was sitting at the counter with a steaming cup of tea. She didn’t so much as blink as he dropped you into the chair next to her, already used to her mate’s antics.
“Goodmorning, Y/n,” Nesta said, pushing an already prepared cup of tea your way.
“Oh, you are an absolute goddess,” you groaned, greedily accepting the mug. You curled your ice cold fingers around it, relishing in the warmth.
“Hey! What about me?” Cassian yelled, swinging a wash cloth over his shoulder as he started to make breakfast for the two of you. “I’m the one making you guys food!”
“You’re also the one who woke us up, dingbat,” you scoffed, causing Nesta to snort.
It wasn’t long before Cassian was sliding a plate of pancakes your way. “Eat up. You have a long day ahead of you.”
You raised an eyebrow at him but accepted the food, scarfing it down. It was almost hilarious how out of the three of you it was Cassian who cooked the best.
After breakfast, you retired to your room to get ready to go down to the River House for the real celebrations. Cassian had cryptically told you to wear pants, so you did. You had no idea why until hours later, when you were all lounging in the sitting room after lunch.
A knock on the front door had you jumping up from your seat. “I’ll get it!”
No one batted an eye as you raced for the door, pulling it open to see Lucien standing on the doorstep. You let out a noise of excitement, grabbing him in a hug.
“Lucien!” you exclaimed. “You’re here early!”
A few weeks after the incident, Lucien had sent you a letter asking how you were faring and offering you support. He became a lifeline while you had dealt with the aftermath of saying goodbye to your mate and healing. You both leaned on each other during that time because you were simply the only two who understood the pain of having a mate who fell in love with another.
“Happy Winter Solstice,” he said as you pulled away and opened the door wider so he could enter. “I’m actually here to retrieve you.”
Your brows furrowed in confusion. “What?”
“Is everything ready?”
Your brother’s voice came from behind you and you whipped your head around to stare at him. He was wearing his flying leathers now only confusing you further.
“Yes,” Lucien nodded.
“What’s going on?” you asked, suspiciously.
No one else followed Cassian out. Not even Nesta. You frowned as he shook Lucien’s hand, giving him a friendly whack on the back.
“You’ll see,” your brother said with a grin. “Lucien is going to winnow us somewhere, kiddo, to your solstice gift.”
You looked between them with narrowed eyes but accepted Lucien’s outstretched hand. His grin was the last thing you saw before you were pulled away in a flurry of wind. A second later, you appeared in the middle of a clearing.
The tall green grass, the slightly warm breeze, the lack of snow, told you that you were in the Spring Court. You whirled to face your brother who let out a sneeze as soon as he got his bearings.
“What are we doing here?”
“So, you know how when Feyre was brought back she was given a drop of power from every High Lord?” Cassian asked.
You nodded, not understanding where this was going. Your hand slipped into your pocket, around a stone that was always kept there. The one Azriel had left you. You had never used it but for some reason, had never parted with it either. At some point, you had started holding it whenever you felt nervous or fell back into the heartache you had experienced last year.
“Well, of course she inherited part of Tamlin’s shapeshifting powers. And we thought maybe she could shapeshift others the way he does, but after numerous tries, unfortunately it seems as though the sliver of power she received only allows her to transform herself.”
“It was not fun being the guinea pig for those test runs,” Lucien laughed. “When Feyre was unable to do it, we had to turn to someone else.”
“Okay, but what does that have to do with me? Or my solstice gift?”
Before either of them could respond, a noise came from the shrubbery in the distance. Tamlin’s beast form pounced out from it, striding towards you. You gasped and backed away, right into your brother’s chest. He placed a hand on your shoulder.
“It’s okay,” he murmured. “He’s here as a favor to Lucien.”
“And Feyre and Rhys approved this?” you whispered up to him.
He nodded his assurance.
You let out another gasp as Tamlin shifted back into his fae form. He looked well, better than the last time you had seen him at least. He seemed to have regained some weight and gotten a haircut. You knew he was still in the process of recovering his court. You wondered what sort of strings Lucien had to pull to get him to willingly let you and Cassian come here considering his history with your rulers.
He gave you and Cassian a polite, but bland, greeting which you reciprocated.
“Are any of you going to tell me what’s going on?”
“Tam is going to help you shapeshift,” Lucien explained. “If you will allow him.”
“Shapeshift? But why would I–”
It clicked in your head, what they were implying, why they had brought you to this large clearing. You whipped around to look up at your brother who seemed to be holding back tears. He gave you a nod, already knowing what you were asking.
“W-wings,” you choked out. “He can give me wings.”
“It won’t last forever,” Lucien said. “But yes, he can give you wings.”
Tears started slipping down your cheeks and you lurched towards Lucien, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him into a hug. You…you were going to have wings. You were going to be able to fly!
You didn’t care that it wouldn’t last forever. Just the chance to fly once more was a gift in itself.
“Thank you,” you whispered into his ear. “Thank you.”
Lucien laughed, hugging you back before you slowly pulled away from him. You looked over your shoulder at your brother. “This was your idea?”
Cassian shook his head. “As much as I wish I could claim this, it was actually Lucien who thought of this first. I’m just here to supervise–and to offer you a flying partner if you’ll have me.”
You smiled up at Lucien, unbelievably touched at the thoughtfulness. Lucien wiped your tears from your face, gently, before placing his hands on your shoulders. “Are you ready?”
You nodded with enthusiasm.
Lucien gestured at Tamlin to come closer.
“Thank you for doing this,” you said to him with a small bow of the head.
“I once watched a faerie die after losing his wings,” Tamlin murmured. “Its…Its a horrific crime. One my family has a history with. I’d like this to be my first step towards making amends for their mistakes.”
You weren’t sure what to say, so you just gave him a grateful nod of the head. He focused intently on you and you felt his magic surround you. It felt nice, like a crisp Spring breeze. And then you felt a familiar weight on your back. You stumbled for a second, readjusting to how it used to feel having wings. But it surprisingly came back to you quite easily.
You looked at them over your shoulder, stretching them out and flapping them a few times. They looked just like your brother’s and you realized Tamlin must’ve used him as a guide. You grinned, facing Cassian.
“Race you towards the end of the clearing,” you shouted before taking off into the sky.
Your brother’s laughter followed after you as he too launched into the sky.
+++
Hours after night had fallen, you found yourself behind the River House, leaning on the railing to watch the slow moving river. Your wings had since dissipated, but you hadn’t felt this light in a long time. Being able to fly today had healed you in some way.
You had spent a lot of time thinking while you flew amongst the clouds. Thinking of who you used to be. Sometimes you missed that girl, sometimes you wished more than anything to be her again.
But you hadn’t felt that today…
Today, you had felt like a new person. Like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. And perhaps in a way, you were.
Life had never been predictable. Your whole life had been filled with tragedy and sorrow, challenges and hard work, happiness and joy, regret and insecurities. You had gone through so much, so much, but somehow, you were always able to come out on the other side.
It wasn’t easy. It involved many days of despair, awful thoughts, and soulless recovery. You had to fight to get up sometimes, had to fight just to feel something. Sometimes it seemed like you’d conquer one mountain only to be faced with another.
If it wasn’t for your brother, you were certain you would’ve fallen back a dozen times. But he had been your pillar of strength, your rock to rest against when things got too hard. And Mor and Rhys had been there to help lift you back up.
You had gained new friends, found a new life for yourself. Metamorphosed into a new person.
That girl from a year ago?
Well, you were finally going to let her die.
You reached into your pocket and pulled out the stone Azriel had left you. You ran your thumb over its smooth surface. It didn’t hurt as much to look at it now, not like it had before. Before it had represented so many things.
The loss of love, the grief of losing your wings, the reminder that he had betrayed you.
But now…now it just looked like a rock.
You gripped it in your fist and tossed it into the Sidra, watching as it hit the water’s surface with a small thud before sinking down into the black water. Down and down, until it would find its way to the bottom. Perhaps then it would drift out into the sea.
You heard the backdoor to the house open.
“Hey, Y/n, come on!” Mor shouted out to you. “We’re going to Ritas!”
You took one last look at where the rock had disappeared in the water, letting out a long breath.
“Goodbye,” you whispered into the cold air. “I’ll see you in our next lifetime. Maybe then you’ll deserve me.”
With a new weight lifted off your shoulders, you turned and marched back to your new beginning.
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