#thats how ppl get addicted too btw

[ghostinthetumbchine]

And what if i say i dont think Mairon was even in love w Melkor, i think he just got intensely trauma bonded and by the time he realised whats going on it was "too late" and so he went into denial about this and then it just became his psychological modus operandi - anything bad we can ignore, laugh at, minimise, be in denial over

[desire-mona]

siiiigh. todd autism headcanons because im projecting.

(using they/he/she pronouns for todd in this post. will explain but also if u dont agree i dont care, tw for alcoholism. time period is vague but autism hasnt existed as a legitimate medical diagnosis for all that long, so keep it in mind i guess.)

- cannot for the life of him stand welton's blankets. so itchy, just thin enough to not warm you up enough but still make you sweat, not long enough to cover your entire body. yes im making the blanket line in their poem about actual blankets, a boy needs to vent somewhere.

- beyond terrible temperature regulation, ALWAYS just a little too hot which is made worse by her sensory issues when it comes to wet fabric. constant slight agony and it never really goes away. theyre about 5 minutes away from crying about how uncomfortable they are at all times.

- had god awful handwriting until high school, like his teachers could BARELY read his handwriting it was Bad. OOOOOH OH MY GOD THERES A TRAIN GOING BY I CAN HEAR IT HONKING this is a really ironic thing to be pointing out rn but its sooooo worth mentioning. its still honking this is fun. 🚂. anyway. her parents made her spend an entire summer fixing her handwriting bc that was like the One thing her teachers criticised. its Fine now but their motor function simply doesn't deliver in the handwriting department.

- had a VERY INTENSE special interest in aquatic life + marine biology growing up, like read every book about any ocean animal in any library intense. his parents eventually forced him to abandon it because its "not a good career focus" but he still perks up when anyone mentions fish. once talked neils ear off about the biodiversity of coral reefs for roughly 2 hours, neil took her to an aquarium for their first date. rip todd anderson you wouldve loved spongebob squarepants.

- looooves pets, namely cats, but they have Too Sweaty hands all the time so any animal fur sticks onto their hands and just feels. so awful.

- had a brief period in his 20s where he was definitely an alcoholic, started as a social drinker but got too addicted to the feeling of not having to adhere to social conventions quite as hard, especially around other drunk ppl. eventually went sober after they realised they just Cant Stand the feeling of a hangover anymore. autistic ppl r more likely to develop a dependency on alcohol if we do start drinking. just btw.

- gets a Pretty Expansive vocabulary after actually starting to pursue literature. sometimes his family lightly teases him about using big words but it confuses the hell out of him. its just a word she thought would apply best!!

- soooooo obsessed with what other ppls idea of them is, both in an anxious way and out of genuine curiosity. would never ask ppl what they think of her bc she thinks thats 1) very broad 2) seems compliment fish-y and 3) just gonna lead to "i think ur great/ nice/ whatever filler compliment." but the dream is to sit someone (neil) down and just ask him every single question possible about how he perceives him.

- asks a billion clarifying questions about anything someone asks him to do, gets anxious about how many questions he's asking, tries to just figure it out, freaks out about the possibility of getting it wrong, ends up doing the thing perfectly. weekly occurrence.

- never fully grasped the appeal of religion (most definitely grew up catholic or christian or Something) just bc she could NOT let the lack of proof go. ALSO not an atheist bc the vastness of space scares them out of it. religious beliefs r a weird topic for them.

- suppresses a good chunk of his stims in public bc One total time someone looked at him weird while he was chewing on a sweatshirt string and he was like i gotta stop NOW. eventually develops tics and has to mask THOSE in public too. dear god someone let this girl unmask. also i started ticcing while writing that bc my body does this great thing where i only tic when im reminded of the concept of ticcing. its great and totally doesnt make me think im faking them (faking for who? dunno bc it usually happens when im alone)

- DOES in fact stim around neil bc NEIL STIMS TOO!!!!!!!! joyous day when they found THAT out! gets vocal stims of random lines from whatever play neil is practicing for. YEAA ART THOU THEEEEREE was a vocal stim for a solid week and a half which made neil VERY excited (autistic neil. how i love u autistic anderperry)

- velcro is The most evil vile disgusting material to ever grace this mortal realm. he hates it more than anything ever and i mean that fully. the feeling of BOTH sides, the noise, how easily it comes apart, she hates it all.

this is the gender part

never really viewed gender and gender roles as anything to adhere to beyond the fear of punishment if they dont. finds any social convention relating to gender to be Really dumb and meaningless, bc gender isn't (scientifically) real in any capacity, so why treat it like that? for the longest time just shrugged and said "eh, i guess im a boy" bc thats what she was used to being told, and didn't feel particularly drawn to agree OR disagree. eventually realised on a late night that Wait. i dont Actually care what i am. like yeah im a Male i guess but also im just me. my brain doesnt have a gender and i basically am my brain, right? and then never really thought about it again because that's genuinely how little he cares. adhering the most to canon with that mindset, she never really tells anyone (for obvious reasons on top of the overall apathy) and just lets the he/him happen to her but. in my dream world? agender they/he/she todd anderson. and this is MY blog so those are the pronouns im using from now on. i will forever love talking abt how autistic ppl very often view gender differently than allistic ppl, will forever love talking abt how autistic ppl are more likely to be trans. autism!!!

also yes that entire paragraph is just my view of gender, change the pronouns and the todd mentions and its just me. what of it.

[loud-sturniolos]

So I need to ramble about my ex “friend” bc this mf did some horrible shit recently and I have no one to talk to abt it‼️‼️ This is rlly long, and may not make sense, but yk drama is drama, read if u wanna🤷‍♂️ Also, ngl, I’m also toxic in this argument but idc😞‼️

Also I’ve said like a bajillion times but nobody does it; my asks are open for literally anything, like pls talk to me I’m lonely af😞 U can literally ask for drama and I will tell y’all some random ass drama from my life if u want js pls talk to me LMFAO🙏

SOOOOO This kid that I was “friends” with (more like acquaintances, I dont rlly do friends) is such a fucking bitch like if I see him im gonna fucking beat the shit out of him. He messages me like every few weeks out of nowhere about random shit as if we’re friends, so the other day I kinda snapped when he asked “how are you” and i was like “idk why you care, you literally never talk to me at all, you left me on delivered for 3 months when I had nobody then randomly showed up again and tried to act as if nothing happened” and that kinda started an argument but he was to much of a pussy to argue w me😞 (Haven’t had a proper argument in a good while icl). Anyways next day this snapchat accoumt messages me that I’ve had added since december but like idk who it is, they message me w a snap using a random ass filter and the caption “Damien you gave me an eating disorder” so OBVIOUSLY I’m fucking confused asf, bc what?? Who randomly claims someone gave them an eating disorder??? Like especially claiming I gave them one whilst I’m recovering from my own?? back tf up. but anyways im like “wtf, who r u? idk u” and they listed like a few basic things that anybody on my snap knows, and i said anyone would know that, and then this mf bitch goes “Well ik your real parents are druggies” (Long story short, im adopted bc my real mum was addicted to her dads meds, idk abt my real dad) and obviously im like SHOVKED bc i’d only ever told like 4 ppl abt this that I trusted (idrc now tho, ill tell the world tbh😞‼️) so im instantly like “wtf who r u??” and he tries to make a guessing game out of it?? Like what the actual fuck?? Making a game out of my personal life is like a straight up no? Anyways I start yk, stalking n shit bc bro wont tell me who they are and I see their user name has “bl00dy” in, what do I see on my quick add? Ex friends full name, on a different account BUT the username has “bl00dy” in (btw im not like censoring that, thats literally how they spell it in the user💀), so I’m instantly like Who does this ugly mf think they are adding me on a fake account to talk abt my real parents n shit like that, so I head on over to whatsapp bc thats where we message and i send a ss of the fake acc and i say “is this you”, he deny it, I tell him all the proof I have that it’s him (Same hair colour/length from the snap, identical usernames, same humour, same typing style) and he denies it.

Guess who messages me 20 minutes later confessing? he does. If u gonna lie at least keep up the lie like tf? Anyways, he confessed and I was obviously pissed off bc I trusted him with personal info abt my real parents yk?? And I basically tell him he’s a stupid fuck that needs to get a life and he goes “Maybe I went a bit too far.” A BIT?! A BIT TOO FAR?! No mf you went WAYYY too far. Anyways idk what happened adter that part bc whatsapp wont let me back on it bc my storage is HORRIBLE. But I have some screenshots and can remember a bit of it sooo..

Next thing I have is him telling me “Human error is a think yn, you might not be autistic” so obviously I go off at him for that umh.. I wrote a lot so I’ll js put in the screenshot

so yhh.. that part happened😽

Next thing I have screenshotted pissed me off so much y’all dont understand omg. So first, he called me a high school drop out and called me special n told me i got sent to a “special school”, basically mocking my mental health and autism?? When I tell you I know so much about his trauma, and his mental health that I could have brought up in that argument i swear. anyways, i told him how the school i go to now isnt a special school, and that I didnt get “sent” i literally chose to go there, and also I haven’t dropped out of high school bc im still enrolled in a school??? then he suddenly starts asking me abt what job I wanted to do when I’m older, so I tell him (Child protection officer or a detective) and he starts telling me how 1. I’d probably brag about making a child cry and thats a whole other fucking thing if i went on abt that this would be way too long. and 2. How I can never get the jobs bc I need science. Keep that shit in mind, SCIENCE. He starts telling me abt how to get the job i want, the job i’ve been researching into for 3 years, he js starts telling me abt how ill mever get it. Then he brings up how I need psychology for it. And he says how psychology is a science. When I tell u this mf stupid istg😞 So I have to go explaining to this dumbfuck that i do not, in fact, need a science degree i meed a psychology degree. Then he tries to tell me how detectives use chemicals and stuff and I’m like… you mean the forensics team need chemicals? Bc detectives and forensics teams are two different jobs bae😨.

anywaysss, next thing I have screenshotted is me mocking his dumbass but idk the messages b4 it. but the SS is just this:

so thats cute. Anyways, the next thing that happened is when I got my older sister involved bc mf should not have brought it up!!

So I told him at some point to sort his memory out bc he was telling me things that didnt happen, then this mf tells me to basically stop being a hypocrite and tells me that the pills im on fucks up my memory. So, then im confused bc.. I’m not on meds? So I’m like “where tf did you get that from? i dont take pills” and this little fucker i swear i will kill him if he comes near me again, he fucking says “You failed an overdose, hence why I thought you took pills”. Who the fuck does this fucker think he is to bring up MY mental health? To bring up MY suicide attempts?!?! Like actually, he can shut right up bc he’s attempted too, so????? Anyways I was like fully gobsmacked rhat this stupid little fuck thought he could bring up my mental health like that, so I gave the phone to my sister bc shes a toxic bitch and she will gladly argue w anyone🤗

Heres a lil list of things I remember happening but don’t remember the whole thing(that dont make sense but oh well):

He brought up (to my sister) that she hangs out with “druggies” (People in her friend group smoke, vape, do ket, and weed etc. but she only smokes and vapes)

He sent a very quickly deleted message that I managed to read that was basically him 1. calling me a she (transphobic little shit) and 2. telling someone else about MY overdose. Honestly💀. Me and my sister know who he was most likely telling anyways bc he only has one friend😽

Anyways rhats all I rlly rememberrrr.. I can probably remember skme other things, or drama that happened before this argument so if you want more of my drama filled life js ask‼️😽

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Hey!! 👋🏽😄 I know you said in your last rant about SK8 and Reki and Renga that you were one of those people that always looks up and learns from others, but after your last Langa edit, I just wanted to remind you how immensely talented you are. I might have not seen your first attempts at editing, but I know how it looks like when you're barely starting something, and I'm sure everyone is proud of the progress you've made and many people looks up to you as the level of skill they want to achieve. You're doing amazing! 💖💖💖

Hi, my love!!!!!! ASDFSDFGHG that’s soooo sweet, thank you so much for saying this, it really means the world to me <3 Oh, haha I’ve deleted most of my old videos so it wouldn’t hurt anyone’s eyes lmao T_T I’m still a bit nervous each time I’m uploading my vids to the day to be honest, even with so many subs rn, but at first I really didn’t have any supporters at all and my god I sucked at this, but I guess the love for my fav ships was stronger apparently haha. So I always get silly happy at each nice comment and feedback, so thank you seriously. 

I really love love love vidding, Idk why but when smth comes out the way I wanted it’s a super addictive feeling for some reason, but many times I just looked at the final result and just threw it in the trash and started over and my god how many times SonyVegas crushed and didn’t autosave the project. I’m like Suga now, I’m pressing the save button each 2 minutes, cause don’t want to lose anything xD Being someone’s inspiration is truly an honor to me, I’ve got some messages that hit me too hard. Still feels weird bc I’m like “but do you know that I can’t even use photoshop tho, how do u like me now then?” lol.

I’m always drawn to talented characters, bc they amaze me, esp the humble ones. Like those who hate Haru or Lanaga just buffle me honestly. I understand that they’re pretty and talented and everything, but they’re also the sweetest and loveliest human beings, so like...??? And I adore those who don’t whine and get what they want. I just can’t help it. I’m a strong believer in the fact that "you can do anything if you put your mind to it”. So far it worked in real life so suck it lol.

People are also saying like Langa doesn’t deserve to win this and Haru doesn’t deserve to be in Olympics, like Langa didn’t snowboard since he was 2 and Haru wasn’t swimming every day since he was born. I’m like.. and you need to check in the mirror if your face is a shade of green. BTW I’ve also been in a professional sports for quite a long time since I was a little kid, ballroom dancing and adored it back then, and I did not get jealous at ppl who were talented than me, I was watching the tapes actually with a popcorn. And oh god those large competition events when you sit there for days and give it all, but then you’re like 296 out of 1000. Why was I proud instead of being sad? Idk xD It was fun.

So thanks for liking the vid, cause I even regretted uploading it a bit yesterday. Sadly everyone already knows that we lost this fandom to the middle schoolers being extra, so they do not care for anything each episode except for this ship, so that’s what I got for posting a just Langa vid:

And etc. and that just made me sad, cause I do not like such fandoms, like it’s not even related to the video, that I’ve been making... with love.  Also thanks for the "sama” title, I’m flattered, but editor only wants to vid matchablossom for now, so like there’s no need for any warnings. I’ve been in such horrendoes fandoms, that I’m immune to this. I also in fact didn’t know some keep ruining Langa’s page and saying that he steals Reki’s screen time... cause he’s aparently the only main character...? ...lmao? I didn’t even know Langa can be hated tbh. I wasn’t really ready for all the drama that followed me making a vid about him.

I’ve already deleted some comments, cause I’m like what this even has to do with the vid about Langa? No, I am not obliged to make a vid about Reki, too. What if I post a matchablossom vid, everyone will only start commenting “do renga”, cause fuck your efforts? I’m like... I hate such fanbases, seriously. I do not even know where this is going, but their fans are already pissing me off. I’m still trying hard for this to not affect my point of view about the ship, cause it’d be kinda unfair to them, but its getting harder each week istg.

And I maybe can’t take requests, but I love when some try to get me addicted on their ship with passion and great arguments. It happened to me with some nice ppl. But def not with agression and stupidity haha.

Cause apparently its one of the fandoms where you can’t NOT care for the main ship, even if you accept it for the only possible Langa ship (cause he doesn’t give a shit for anyone else, so like what’s the point), but it doesn’t do anything for you. I’m like... thanks for threatening. This will make me on board ASAP. Like it’s not the epitomy of love to me... I’m sorry? LMAO 

Some anon even sent me a “you’re dense” (literally thats it) ask after that Reki ask. I was tempted to write smth like “oh I’m sorry, this is the most epic love story of my life and his character is the most complex in the world and he’s the best friend and the most inspiring human being that ever hit my screen. can I become undense now? xD”. But you know I do not know if they’d realise the sarcasm and my pride sadly never allowed me to sell my life values for a bunch of 12 years olds to love me lol

My sister always laughs and jokingly says “but you’d probably get much more subs if you made a vid about this or that, but at what price that would be lmao”. Cause yeah, I never could make myself vid smth I do not like, cause I love vidding and do not want it to be associated with things I do not like, plus it’ll most likely turn out ugly, if I do not care. My mom says that she can feel love I put in my shipping vids that’s why she loves them. I really don’t think she’s wrong. But that also kinda makes me an idiot technically, cause I’m not into many of the popular ships, and some popular animes I just find really basic. 

Also I’m like 100% sure it ain’t happening, but even if they miraculously suck each other’s dicks while sitting on a skate board, I can still have the rights not to care at the end. Like did I sign some form where I’m obliged to love each and everyone canon gay ship even if it’s not what I like? Like gay is not the type of love in relationships. You can only care about his ass like Lan Zhan for example or you can only care about your ass. Like that’s different types of relationships, and whatever you like you like. So get all the way of people’s backs, please.

Also do ppl know that you do not need to be blind to the bad sides of the characters in your ships? Or you just gonna be like “I suddenly can’t see” for forever.

So really thanks for such wonderful message and liking the video and for the boosts when I need them and not being an ass to me if I’m not being obsessed with smth, when you like it. (like I think we have different ship in bnha, right? but we’re still doing great tho, thanks for being an angel <3)

I still didn’t expect this becoming a Voltron 2.0. situation tho. We in our twenties see everything differently, I guess. I do get extra about “their love is everywhere”, but I do not get extra by anonymously attacking ppl, threatening creators and yelling “queeerbating psychotic blind assholes if these two aint fucking by the end of the season I’m shaving my head and jumping out of the window and shoot the director. you do not ship it HARD? YOU DUMB FUCK. THAT’S THE BEST LOVE STORY IN THE WORLD”. Like damn, take your blinders off and see the world, kid. Firstly, it’s definitely not, secondly, ppl see love differently in general and at each age too.

Ah, also you must kill Adam, cause he’s a pedo apparently. Like he ain’t even a threat to your ship, unless you’re blind, but they’re still at it, like they do not know that this kind of age difference is literally nothing for an anime? And that there are canon ships with a huger age difference left and right, too. It’s like its their first time approaching an anime or smth. Like in anime world character can literally kill 1000 ppl with his bare hands and bathe in their blood and we can still stan them, depends on their story, ok? Also Langa couldn’t care less for his advances, so like separate Adam from your ship pls. Like, fuck off, if someone is interested in his character. Yeah, he’s a weirdo for reasons, but anime kind of weird do not apply to real life. Stop acting like you’re some purist, when later you’re gonna ship smth else and it suddenly will not apply. Also rules do not apply to animes, everyone knows they do not apply. These are not western cartoons, my god. And 24 years old flirting with 16 year old is defiinitely not the weirdest shit anyone has ever seen in the anime. Chinese BL has characters who were 14 and 30 when they met and happily married. Also FICTION is not life. Literally no one cares. If you’re scared for your saint eyes, do not watch animes, you’re gonna have a heart-attack from what you can see there. Also we’ve seen gayer bromances in animes, who are just bromances, so pls do not shoot anyone if it’s not canon.

So basically I was kinda pissed yersterday, cause fuck them for ruining the tag, but after chatting with my hommies and your ask, I’m okay again, I just have to avoid this fandom and stick to a tight community xD. I just got used to my nice fandoms and forgot for a bit about the precautions you need to take if you’re in one of those. You know. Who make a circus out of lgbt, instead of supporting it, and make other ppl hate being in fandoms.

P.S. sorry for this partially unrelated rant, your messages really always make my heart bloom, so thanks for supporting me, and I know you’re proud of my progress, too <3 and this makes me happy. LY

[plainvanillapotato]

the 100 diaries S2 E12

quarantine: may 31 2020

season 2 episode 12: “Rubicon”

the guy is running. watch he just die and no one gets clarkes message. i would love it if clarkes plane just backfired but of course they save him. 

ok but wait why was cage just random carrying a oxygen tank when he himself doesnt even need one.

tsing out here with her own personal army. then just plucking these kids one by one. damn 

these grounders really be listening to clarke just because lexa said so?? damn these grounders be loyal minus gustus and that one guy that tried to kill clarke but then got eaten by king kong

is raven really the only person out here doing all this crap?? like does clarke not realize how big of an ask shes asking of raven? raven is magic and shit but she has some limitations just to be somewhat realistic. just chill the fuck out clarke raven is doing the best out here arguably more than clarke.

i love how bellamy is still wearing that hat still looking like sean malto. but also how has someone not noticed him? but i guess bellamy like joe from you as in if he wears a hat he magically blends in.

“...all of this is for nothing” way to put pressure on prettyboy bellamy like he didnt already know that. chill clarke everyone is trying their best out here. ngl i would hate to have clarke as a manager cuz i think she would micromanage the shit out of people. 

remember in the last episode when clarke asked what her job was well i think that i figured it out:

i also wanna mention that finn literally died idk less than a week ago but clarkes in charge being out and about commanding people years her senior. i get that we had that whole episode dedicated to how finns death affects clarke but still she got over that pretty quick. a little too quick. but i guess that if youre a sky person your emotional metabolism is just through the fucking roof...

ooo clarke still be salty toward her mom. but yeah kane is kinda an enabler

but why do these people have clear paper. the art department is feeling themselves on that one. like is it because they wanted to be edgy and futuristic or is it from an actual realistic viewpoint that the space people dont have trees to create paper................does this also mean that the space people didnt have toilet paper???????? but also back to the paper thing did these kids never learn how to write in cursive??? since i would imagine actual writing utensils are limited so idk if they waste it on teaching kids cursive. actually tho does anyone have an answer to these questions??? 

where did jaha get that antler stick. i kinda want one. i like to imagine that he just saw it lying somewhere on their way to the desert and said to himself i would look epic holding that stick and then went to pick up and started using it even tho he doesnt actually need a walking stick....any hunter x hunter fans?

jaha’s mask at 8:29 is an example of what not to wear during corona season

“thanks for the water?”...while looking down a bit flustered ”its, uh..it was no problem” emori and murphy? ship?

bellamy crawling through air vents to save the day...magenta from sky high who??

also bellamy’s ear piece is giving me everything. *i know that the following meme is just a tiny phone but i just really like it so idgaf

again with the inaccuracy of bone marrow extraction.

but what really gets me is clarke recognizing what procedure is going o just by the sound of a drill. ok who is she? she be like the boy that can identify a vacuum just by the sound. For those that don’t know what I’m talking about:

https://youtu.be/Ar5nLNku0CM

A missile?? where did these people get a missile

But also imagine if clarke was like actually i didn’t catch any of that conversation and bellamy just had to recap it like Luis in ant-man. I would die

thats a lot to ask of raven clarke. Like i could never get that shit done no matter how long you gave me. Yeah ppl be screwed if i was part of the 100

That hug btw Clarke and raven...ship? Jk i know it was just a friendship hug but yah can never know with these writers. Like i honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the writers said enemies (being part of that love triangle with finn) to friends to lovers

murphy and emori are definitly a ship. walking together behind with everyone else. Murphy said “i killed two people. I had my reasons but nobody cared.” Fuck you murphy you killed them cuz you a salty bitch. I also hate how he says this so blasé. Like dude want?? Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Murphy also said im the bad guy. Murphy is a billie elish fan?? Duh.

woah when that girl pulled out her claw????? I fell out of my seat. its actually huge. she could grab a whole basket all. They did a great job concealing/ not drawing attention to her hand before like i was so fucking surprised.

“Its pretty badass” and murphy looking at that claw tho...murphy is into kinky shit. But also that look he gave her while she walked away that was the most genuine look I’ve ever seen out of murphy.

Bellamy shoving jasper into a wall and whispering...bellamy and jasper? ship?

this secret talk between bellamy and Dante....bellamy and president Dante? ship?

But i also like to imagine that during this meeting that bellamy has the song dont be suspious. Dont be suspious playing in his head

woah. Mountain man said inconito mode activated. Reminds me of one of those green soldiers in toy story especially during the opening scene of i think the first movie

This character development in clarke is something else like remember when she talked about the grounders wanting finn out in the open and not in private causing a huge public uproar. Look at her now talking in private with Lexa about the missile. Phenomenal character growth if you ask me.

they really put all their eggs in one basket with bellamy. But bellamy be a really good basket tho. Trust Lexa trust.

where tf did this guy get an RPG??

Woah Emori be the real bad guy. But honestly she could slit Murphy’s throat and he would still live because cockroaches can still live without their head.

raven you should have just shut up. You really dropped the ball there.

lincoln???? What are the chances??? Isn’t he still a druggie?? Honestly octavias little speech would not motivate me at all. If anything it would make me want to take more drugs. At this point i would just say to Lincoln “dont fight it”

i like how they took everything but they let jaha keep his stick.

caspian is reall dressed like a hipster that sells artisanal kombucha

Jaha really has some faith in murphy...jaha and murphy? ship?

Also that was a really good shot of them murphy, jaha, and their crew climbing up the hill with a giant moon in the background

Lexa is giving me padme vibez wearing that head scarf like that

they were going to let kane and indra die

yeah sorry to break it to you abby but your child is a killer but then again so are you sooo..you really cant be out here to judge your kid like that. Like mother like daughter. But you really cant lecture clarke on this. you literally gave your husband up and you let your daughter blame her best friend for it. And on top of this you were part of the council that sent 100 kid down to earth without even knowing if earth was survivable. ma’m get the fuck outta here.

but all those lives for bellamy. i think its worth it. Because bellamy is worth everything.

theyre linking arms they got monty no!! absolutely not. they took jasper but i gotta say better he than monty bc Monty is king. Yeah jasper really fumbled with that gun. Really not smart. jasper should have just shot tsing instead

Oof a containment breach. wow what an epic door stop. Sooo loong tsing. That was such a cruel death tho but yeah she kinda deserved it.

Does Dante play the cello?? A real renaissance man isn’t he?

wow this makes octaiva and lincoln like an epic couple that conquered the world. power couple. Goals *gag* but ok does that mean that Lincoln just stopped cold turkey just like that?? Hes just automatically better? No this is not how drug addiction works. But ok sure Jan.

[sortagaysortahigh]

Im sick of ppl like u hating john b, like hes going through sm and hes only 16

LMFAO listen idc if hes only 16, i get that homeboy is going through the motions of his father 1. Abandoning him and 2. Being murked by ward cameron but at the same time you need to understand that his character is an ass starting from the first episode. Like im sorry but i dont think he had any kind of positive character development or character development at all. And his age doesnt mean shit to me bc JJ’s 16, he’s traumatized and going through hell, yet he’s not nearly as much of an asshole as Jombee.

Like topper had positive development, rafe had negative development, we get to learn more ab JJ, Pope-both of them having positive character development, and a little bit ab Kie and Sarah here and there. The pogues and kooks have their backstories and yeah some of the shit they do can be justified just like you can try to justify jombee’s actions but like at the end of the day I just genuinely don’t like his character and he pisses me off in the show.

He’s a dick to his friends, he throws shit in their faces constantly, he thinks that they should drop everything to help him find fucking gold for some promised dream he has, this dream btw is his way of channeling his downward spiral snd grief for losing his pops. He makes everything ab himself and when shit goes left he throws fits ab it. Plus he ran away w some girl after barely knowing her on a boat that his bestfriend stole. I think hes v manipulative and selfish

Jj’s wreckless and a hothead bc he’s been getting his ass beat by his father bc he resembles his mother too much for his fathers liking. Jombee lets him stay at the chateau, but also throws the fact that his father is abusive and an addict back in his face. You cant expect me to believe that jombee, the person who’s known Jj since the third grade didnt know ab his dad. It doesnt need to be mentioned in the show for it to be inferred. Pope and Kie might not have known but if JJ and Jombee were rlly that close that he lets him live in the chateau no questions asked then he knew.

I dont hate jombee just bc i think its funny, like no he’s not likeable at all-sure he’s attractive-but thats it. His character traits are shitty, he’s not the fucking savior or hero they make him out to be. He’s a kid channeling his trauma into finding some gold, he’s aggressive and takes shit out on the people who care ab him the most, and he’s naive, selfish, and has a power complex.

AND please dont bring up how I write ab Rafe and how i love Rafe and how I want him to have his redemption arc and all that other shit. I write ab Rafe bc i think hes 1. Hot, 2. Has redeeming qualities but not necessarily deserving of a one season redemption arc, and 3. He’s a dickhead, and its easy to write ab him or throw him into an AU. Oh and heres a bonus: i have daddy issues so i find his psychotic ass attractive oh well.

[simptasia]

Top 5 horror movies?

1. the mist. a horror movie that is actually horrifying. on several levels. this is most emotionally exhausting movie to watch. the creature effects are fantastic, in that I’m So Upset, especially at the spider things (THAT SCENE UGGHHGHHHHH) and okay, for reals, i think mrs. carmody may be the most horrific, despicable villian in film history. YEAH. THINK ABOUT THAT. the actress playing her deserves a fucking AWARD for how much i fucking hate mrs. carmody. the creatures fuck me up, mrs. carmody fucks me up, the ending. fucks. me. up. i highly recommend this movie but uh, It’s A Tough One

2. se7en. ohhhh boy dude i rewatched this recently, this movie is so good????? what the fuck!! okay so i first watched this as a kid (i may have been 7 when i saw se7en, heh) which, like, yeah i know. but whatever. like, do i need to tell anybody how good this movie is? do i need to tell you morgan freeman and brad pitt are amazing in it? and kevin spacey too. sigh. good actor, terrible person. the deaths are very upsetting and yet it’s really our imaginations making it so much worse. the sloth victim and lust victims are the stand outs, of course. (i said victims plural for lust because that dude. that guy. that fucking dude. you know who i mean. that dude is fucked up for life OR he’s gonna kill himself. i make special mention of him because he’s played by leland orser, for like 20 seconds of footage but FUCK it’s a helluva 20 seconds, such as it kick started his career). anyways. it’s fucked up, it’s emotional, the performances are great, i care about the characters. i think it leans more in the psych thriller genre but i’d say this is a horror movie. this one is another i’d recommend to most people

3. shaun of the dead. i fucking KNOW it’s a comedy and an homage to zombie movies but that doesn’t mean simon and nick didn’t make a genuine fucking zombie movie and also there are parts of this that scare the shit outta me. because zombies freak me out a lot. buuut my love for this isn’t mostly coming from the horror aspect, it’s just a really great movie. it’s funny, intense at times, has some genuinely moving performances (simon pegg, holy fuck). also this movie got me addicted to don’t stop me now by queen and THAT is boss

4. final destination 1 and 3. been super into the FD franchise since i was a kid (twas a time i could get super encyclopedic about it like i can with say, LOST or whatever. what im saying is FD has been a spec interest of mine). and of the 5 movies (so far, c’monnnn) 1 and 3 are the best and the ones i have the most fondness for. also helps that these two have the best acted protags. (i have a crush on mary elizabeth winstead and this is one of the movies that started it. the other was sky high btw) i cannae describe WHY i like FD movies so much so it’s really just like that meme... I Just Think They’re Neat. hope they make more

5. the saw franchise (of which there are 8 movies). it has it’s ups and downs but holy gosh did this series surprise me. it has a rep for being dumb torture porn but no??? like yeah it’s gross, it’s gorey... but i was surprised to find this shit has story?? CONTINUITY??? flashbacks upon flashbacks upon flashbacks. this series is the Master of the retcon to the point where its kinda hilarious. the twists, the backstory/flashbacks/soap opera, the MUSIC, the traps themselves and of course tobin motherfucking bell, who is a boss. yeah. yeah. good shit. also some ppl don’t like the really weird editing but i do, it’s the franchises’ Style ya know. this series is like a grunge music video but way way more fucked up. theres a ton of things that DESERVE to go before the saw franchise but. i really like ‘em

honourable mentions: it chapter one (i haven’t seen two yet), misery, get out, cabin in the woods, thinner, 1408, psycho,  the fly (1986)

there’s probs more but thats what i can think of at the moment

[homokommari]

few points out of the way first

1. this post is gonna talk about alcoholism. my dad was/is an abuser and an alcoholic. 

2. alcoholism is not a flaw in a persons morality or anything like that, addicts deserve to live safe stable fulfilling lives as much as anyone else, so if you think of using my trauma as justification for your hatred of addicts you can fuck offfff

3. this isn’t a callout. i just think this person is a dumbass and thats not exactly harmless, but its not dangerous either. 

so. tumblr user girlfriendluvr, huh? yeah. they are incredibly popular and im guessing a lot of ppl who follow me follow them as well. again this isnt a callout so following them and me is like fine by me. i used to follow them too. 

so there was this post (link)

the list was being violent, being quick to anger, not showering, cheating, etc. then there was

the comments were shitting on the article calling the demands “brutal”. this was their comment

to recap my father who was abusive was also an alcoholic. before i had even had a handful of crushes, as a young kid, i knew with absolute certainty that i did not want to marry an alcoholic. my mother after divorcing my dad did not want to date anyone who was an alcoholic or enjoyed drinking to get drunk. 

so to me that comment was a slap to the face. it was basically calling me out on not wanting to date an alcoholic. my first instinct was to argue against it, but then i decided to not to. i still however believed that not wanting to date an alcoholic was a valid choice for a person to make. and i cried about it to my girlfriend. cried thinking of my father. crying for what me and my family had to endure. 

why i did not argue against them on whether or not it is acceptable to not want to date an alcoholic?

well, for the obvious reasons. addicts are treated poorly by society, they are as a group oppressed. it is bad to be against dating a person because they are a part of an oppressed group, that is obvious.

so while i did feel the way i did i was also full of self doubt. was i wrong, was i being immoral in not wanting to date an alcoholic? i asked myself that question in earnest. i do geniunely care for fellow peoples well being and i am against oppression, so it was my moral duty to ask myself that, even if the answer was

it is completely fine for anyone to not include alcoholists in their dating pool. 

all people are fully responsible for their actions when they are intoxicated. being intoxicated affects your thoughts and behaviours, alcohol has a real concrete effect on the human body. 

people when they are intoxicated will become more self centered, more rude and thoughtless, more physically confrontational and violent. 

an alcoholic is a person who will often be intoxicated, meaning that they will often be emotionally and physically violent. 

not all alcoholics are abusers. 

but all alcoholics will be often intoxicated and act the way intoxicated people do, which ranges from unpleasant to dangerous. 

it is not morally wrong to not want to let into your life a person just based on not wanting to deal with an intoxicated person alone. but there is also the fact that there are alcoholics that are also abusers, and when an abuser is an alcoholic it makes the abuse more violent and makes it less likely for the victims to recognize that they are being abused. 

a person who is violent will be more violent when they are intoxicated. 

a person who is violent when intoxicated will more likely be excused for being violent when intoxicated. 

but all people are fully responsible for their actions when intoxicated. 

and alcohol affects the way a person acts. 

not wanting to be in a relationship who is intoxicated a lot is fully understandable and not condemnable. 

basically in that comment girlfriendluvr was moralizing over people making a morally ok choice to make AT BEST. at worst she is judging victims of abuse for not wanting to face more abuse or retraumatizing themselves. 

what was girlfriendluvrs crime here?

besides making me cry? just being fully fluent in ideas of social justice but trying to apply it in an inappropriate place, showcasing that they actually lack understanding on what oppression for alcoholics is. annoying holier-than-thou attitide basically. 

this post, that comment they made, stuck with me for several months and the reason why it was 100% bullshit has slowly gathered in my mind and i really needed to just.... put it out there. 

im not @-ing them bc it was draining enough to write this. itd be cool if they like rethought their comment and learned something about how alcoholism affects the alcoholip persons family, but im too tired. if you wanna bring this up with them tho go ahead. 

*stop reading at this if you dont wanna read a description of pedophilia in anime*

one last thing is that i used to follow them but unfollowed them not after this post, but way later when i decided to watch revue starlight. girlfriendluvr has since the airing of the first episode been advertising revue starlight as a good show, encouraging people to watch it and comparing it as a better anime than madoka. 

madoka is an anime with multiple problems in its content but at the very least madoka does not have a scene where a teenage girl is shown washing her body and all of the girls boob except nipples are shown. 

so the fact that they did not even once thought to mention “oh btw the show is also total pedo bait” made me realize that they seriously lack some critical thinking skills and i hit that unfollow

[ua-monoma]

[[ hi here’s a text convo me and dani were having during the iimono text convo woohoo feelings ]]

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:16 AM

iida's definition of alright is "im not completely hurting to the point where it is hard to do or think abt anything else"

rickyLast Sunday at 4:17 AM

THATS A BAD DEFINITION IIDA

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:17 AM

if he can do his duties without being hindered he's "alright"

rickyLast Sunday at 4:18 AM

like tbh monoma's big feels rn are like 

 1) i wanna communicate but it feels like iida doesnt actually communicate with me ever 

2) i wanna be honest but it feels like iida isnt being honest with me 

3) i've been opening up a lot which im! proud of!! i can face my emotions now! but iida isnt facing HIS emotions with me and i thought uHh being a couple means we do that together so i guess i'll go fuck myselfsdfskhdgbg

but ALSO from an outside perspective iida Does Communicate and Is Honest... way more than monoma perceives it but monoma sucks. at being able to identify it

A L S O he cant stand iida taking care of him so much sfhgbsfbhsg hes starting to feel rly coddled and he Does Not Like It

and thats largely just cuz hes so unstable and feels guilty about it now that hes more aware of it and wants to either just shut down and stop emoting around iida or, like, he wants to get to take care of iida if/when he ever breaks down cuz then it'll be Equals

kdfgdfhbdfgs i just had a hunch and it was right, monoma is actually older than iida sdfbjhgs

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:22 AM

WAIT HE IS

HES OLDER,

rickyLast Sunday at 4:27 AM

but yeah i think the other thing is that monoma wants stuff from iida but like has not been able to rly voice it (i feel like this is the first time he has ever talked like This Much about emotional bullshit) but also TBH he feels brushed aside every time iida gives him one of his lil speeches

cuz he doesnt respond very well to positivity and also will just latch onto the negative aspects

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:30 AM

WOW then u have iida whos just like "dude im not a fuckign mind reader tell me what u want"

rickyLast Sunday at 4:30 AM

WHICH I KNOW BUT HE'S WORKING ON IT.....

iida: communicate pls monoma: ok heres a big rambling post about stuff i feel iida: ok thats nice. can you communicate with me pls tho monoma: I JUST DID HSDFKGGBDFSG I'LL JUST GO FUCK MYSELF THEN I GUESS--

^ is how he feels

also hes scared of the Boyfriend Conversation

which i think i've told you before, hes scared cuz of the sex addiction thing but also,

ppl keep coercing him to sex and he doesnt wanna date iida and then be coerced into Officially Cheating,,, pseudo cheating isnt acceptable either but at least like,,, hes Technically not betraying him,

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:36 AM

THE RAMBLING THING isnt clear to iida bc its like yes that is how he feels but he is not telling me What He Wants From Me

rickyLast Sunday at 4:37 AM

YEAH thats what i noticed today +_+!!!

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:38 AM

its like monoma is offering his stance but not a solution or a compromise

rickyLast Sunday at 4:38 AM

monoma doesnt rly know that's what he's supposed to do hjbsjfsg

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:38 AM

does iida have to spell it out

rickyLast Sunday at 4:38 AM

y es

like, the last thing iida said kind of made monoma be like

wait lemme look at it again

ok he said he wanted to know the reasons behind his actions and monoma was like,,,,wha--

cuz... 1) theres like never actually a reason and 2) he didnt know iida wanted that from him

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:40 AM

H

rickyLast Sunday at 4:40 AM

like monoma barely even recognizes half his actions cuz theyre all based on impulses and tbh if nobody pointed them out he'll just move on like nothing's happened

like he compartmentalizes,,, s o much,,,,,, and then represses it like instantly like TBH

like barely anyone talks about monoma's growing alcoholism so he just keeps doing that, and no one has had the chance to tell him to stop communicating with villains so he kept doing that too but like. Because it wasnt pointed out he barely has a problem with it and can function fine

everyone harps on him for the sex stuff tho so he's just like Drowning In Guilt

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:44 AM

is there literally-- any way iida can actually help him because, i just , wow

rickyLast Sunday at 4:44 AM

sfjgkdfg 

iida: here's a list of questions to communicate with, pls answer monoma: dissociates instantly 

whOH YEAH DEFINITELYi know that sounds all depressing sjhsdfghthe fix is honestly super easy tbh

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 4:45 AM

HE ASKED TWO WHOLE QUESTIO-jvhcfdjsjcxsdjhds

god im glad there is indeed a fix

rickyLast Sunday at 4:45 AM

I WAS TYPING UP MORE META I HAVENT GOTTEN TO IT YET

monoma's problem is literally just that he doesnt have the vocabulary for, like, anything

what he wants is an open relationship but he doesnt know what that is and TO BE QUITE FRANK his only knowledge of one is fucking sen and kosei

so like, he's only hesitating so much cuz he doesnt know how to voice what he wants cuz Tbh monoma hates not sounding smart and being emotive means bumbling around like an idiot

he still feels brushed off tho,

iida bls be sad around him more

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:02 AM

IIDA DOESNT LIKE BEING SAD

its weird for him

he always like

how do i put this

he takes his sadness, pisses on it, and sets it on fire

rickyLast Sunday at 5:02 AM

oh God i just realized iida is doing the same thing the guy i was gay for did FUCKMeJFBJHFBGDG

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:03 AM

oh he pissed on his  sadness too? worm

rickyLast Sunday at 5:03 AM

he did the 'im alright is actually crashing and burning in super slow motion for months at a time' thing

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:03 AM

iida is hollow more often than he is sad

1JDCKCDSNHSDSNDSCJ

rickyLast Sunday at 5:05 AM

meanwhile i had the loudly has breakdowns and then gets upset about being taken care of despite him insisting because of his Fetish for taking care of people thing

me: glares at iidas Fetish

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:06 AM

ok this is more of a hc but

iida likes taking care of ppl bc his parents rarely took care of him uwus

o hes like

rickyLast Sunday at 5:07 AM

CRIES

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:07 AM

being the Dad and Mom he never had

rickyLast Sunday at 5:07 AM

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

see that Sucks cuz my hc is that monoma was raised to be as self sufficient as possible as Fast as possible which meant wow we aint got time for emotions fam just Put Them In A Box

oh is the box overflowing, put the BOX in a BIGGER BOX

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM

emotionally stunted boys sure are great

rickyLast Sunday at 5:08 AM

i k r

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM

only in theory tho,

rickyLast Sunday at 5:08 AM

LOL

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:08 AM

irl i wouldve just

choked them

rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM

sobs angrily about iida

share your emotions biiiiiiitchhhh

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:09 AM

hits the back of monoma's head

rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM

hEY

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:09 AM

just tell him what u want u stupid fuckJCDFJDSSD

rickyLast Sunday at 5:09 AM

HE WANTS YOU TO SHARE HIS EMOTIONS HSFBGJHFGS HE SAID THAT!!!!AND IIDA WAS LIKE, NAH

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:10 AM

IIDA ISNT RLLY THAT SURE OF HIS EMOTIONS EITHER THATS WHY!!!

HE THINKS HES THIS BUT HES ACTUALLY SOMETHING ELSE

rickyLast Sunday at 5:10 AM

THATS MONOMAS PROBLEM TOO YOU BUTT DFHBSDFGJGSG

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:10 AM

FUCK

rickyLast Sunday at 5:11 AM

OHMY

GODSTRANGLES THEM BOTH

IIMONO: FEELINGS?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:11 AM

w iida its more like. he knows deep down but he doesnt , think , its important enough , to be addressed

rickyLast Sunday at 5:11 AM

i i d a b l s

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:11 AM

"as class rep i must be a leader before anything else!!!!!"

rickyLast Sunday at 5:12 AM

monoma is honestly like 'iida help this is the very first time in my life i have felt Guilt what am i supposed to do with this!!!!!!

iida: whats wrong monoma: IM SAD????  WHY DIDNT ANYONE EVER TELL ME WHAT A CONSEQUENCE WAS iida: ,

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:14 AM

JXVCDJXCDSAHJSDSDJ

rickyLast Sunday at 5:15 AM

and t b h he kind of is like, automatically expecting like... a Reward for getting this far but iida just kind of keeps being like 'okay cool. and what else'

and monoma is like HJSFBKHBFGS THAT TOOK ME 3 WEEKS TO FIGURE OUT B L S

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:28 AM

fuckcdncnddxjsn

rickyLast Sunday at 5:28 AM

,,,, in person or continue the text

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:29 AM

CCCCONTINUE...they rarely text god pls

rickyLast Sunday at 5:30 AM

TBH YEAH...

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:30 AM

iida has no Time for his phone he needs to read 30 chapters ahead so he doesnt fall behind!!!

rickyLast Sunday at 5:30 AM

monoma is Traumatized by all their other text convos so he doesnt--

im including the times when i post this btw because God Damn i love that its likefucking 5am over here

小林 未郁Last Sunday at 5:31 AM

GO TO BED?

rickyLast Sunday at 5:31 AM

this is 500% a 'im sad texting my bitchass pseudo bae about my feelings at fucking sunrise after they kept me up crying all night' conversation

whats a bed

[jalboyhenthusiast]

oh wow..that made me feel a bit weird😬 but I think the reason I’m still on anon (apart from me being shy) is that I’m kinda worried you won’t like me if you see who i am? and we’ll stop talking.. idk, I’m stupid, never mind.

i found out we have Euro (football) in my city starting today? and like foreigners are coming here? and there’ll be lots of ppl gathered in places? I don’t think it’ll help the situation with covid lol

yeah I agree! when we have a holiday and it’s either on Friday or on Monday, so we have 3 days off together that’s always so good! and I always say why can’t we have 4 working days and 3 days off??? bc 2 days isn’t enough, you barely start to feel like you’re off on Saturday and then on Sunday you have to get ready for work again ugh

soooo, as this all started with discussion about books I just had to ask. my friend told me about this series called All for the Game, starting with The Foxhole Court and I was wondering if you’ve ever heard about it/maybe even read it? I’m already on the last book (read first two in like three days), it’s so addicting and I’m so drawn into it! it’s been a long time since I was so invested in a book.

anywaaay, hope you’ve had a great week and have fun on the weekend!♥️ o.

dfkgjdfkg im SORRY i didnt mean to make you feel weird. no pressure to do anything i promise!! but nooo i already like you so thats impossible <3

omg exaaactly. my friend started a new job recently where she doesnt work fridays and she explains that exact thing. bc you actually have the two days of relaxing/socialising and the third day to do all your chores/prep. its the dream!!

yes i have!! i read aftg in 2016 and loved the whole series! i remember telling everyone around me about it and making them all read it too lmao. and i completely agree about it being addicting. i have a distinct memory of missing my train stop and ending up in the middle of nowhere bc i was too busy reading it 💀

ty btw i had a lovely weekend!! how was yours??

[challia]

Goodbye Petyr Baelish. Thank you Aidan Gillen.

I have to admit, this is a very difficult post for me to write. It took me almost 4 days to get my shit together and be able to turn my thoughts into words. Four days of mourning and healing my broken heart a little bit. But here it is. Think of this what you want. It is not a summary. It is not a judgement post. Just my emotions thrown down in front of you all here on Tumblr, because I just need to get it out of my system to be able to move on. 

My adventure with Game of Thrones begun with the start of the first season, years ago. It was something totally new and surprising. I have been a huge LOST fan before, and The Walking Dead as well so I thought not much on tv could surprise me. I was so wrong. GoT turned out to be captivating, intriguing and addictive series and before season 1 was over, I was done with the books. All of what was written so far. I fell in love with some characters immediately (Tyrion), some had to grow on me and prove themselves with their actions (Jaime), some I had a love/hate relationship with (Cercei), but one character always stood out. Always was different from others. Too original, too special and too exceptional for all this bunch of personalities, protagonists and villains. He got my attention from the very first episode he appeared in. He intrigued me. He was kind, nice and funny, but behind that smirk and blue eyes there was hidden darkness. His smart one-liners, his good (or bad) advices, his intelligent and captivating dialogues with other characters..I got to love his character immediately. First in the show. He had a handsome face of Aidan Gillen, an actor I knew nothing about at that time, not built for a knight but slender and elegant way about himself, very much suited for the court and the position Petyr Baelish was in. He was very intriguing. Not clearly a good, “white” character because it was obvious he was hiding something, but not also a bad guy. So after I read the books, got to know his story better, especially the story that happened before the show, before Sansa, before the war and everything...That is when it hit me. I knew he will always be my favourite, that I will always root for him, that he will for me always be the only person worthy of this stupid Iron Throne because he was the only one who fought for it so hard and worked for it. I know Jon/Aegon or whatever deserves it by blood. I know Cersei is the Queen and for some people, she is the rightful Queen. Petyr is a tragic character. A boy who had nothing but through his hard work, not always fair, not always good, sometimes ruthless and cruel..but he did get power that he wanted. It was love that ended him. We all knew that it will. From the moment he took Sansa from Kings Landing we all knew where it was heading. There could never be a Petyr and Sansa on the Iron Throne. Even though so many people wanted it. There was always death’s breath on Petyr’s back but truth is, he always provoked it. He teased it, but some things cannot be manipulated. 

At some point, I always knew it was going to be Sansa to kill him. And I was even ok with it. I thought I was. But when I heard her speaking in the Great Hall of Winterfell, when she said his name...I left the room. I couldn’t watch this. I came back a few minutes later and asked my husband if it’s done. He said yes but I could see he was really upset and annoyed aswell and he is not a fan. Littlefinger’s death should have been done better. And I don’t mean his begging for his life because seriously, who wouldn’t? Wouldn’t you cry and go on your knees and beg for your life it it was in the hands of the person you love? But the whole Winterfell plot was very poor in my opinion. Arya has become some crazy zombie psycho killer, btw I couldnt stand the triumph on her face when LF was being accused by Sansa, it was disgusting. Sansa struggles to maintain her postion, everyone knows that. But seriously, if she wanted justice, she should have ordered a fair trial for Baelish. Even Tyrion had it. Twice even. Or a trial of combat. Instead she just murdered him. She didn’t give him any chance to defend himself. And she may cry all the tears in the world but thats something I will never forgive her. 

So it is over now. Littlefinger’s story. At some point also Sansa’s because their stories connected and became one. I think I am relieved. Because with all the stupid, idiotic and pathetic things that DDs gave us this season, I won’t have to worry they will ruin my beloved character even worse. And people love to ruin. To be mean and cruel. I read some of the reactions of GoT fans from my country on FB. The last episode was streaming here in the major cinemas and ppl could go and watch it there. Their reactions frightened me. Especially this one: “the best moment was when Arya killed LF and everyone started applause”. Shit. What kind of world do we live in? What kind of people watch the show and how much of it can they really understand?

One last word about Aidan Gillen’s performance. I really have no words for it. This guy deserves all the Emmys, Globes and Oscars, seriously. In 2 minutes he went from self righteous, through defensive, disbeliving to complete mess and a child that had always been within him. I love him and always will for giving this character such depth and all the emotions we could experience. Best actor on the show, no doubt. 

Well, that’s it. Sorry for long post. I am heartbroken but in time it will heal. There is no justice for our loved ones i think, not even in fictional worlds. But we know these characters for years, we bind to them. And 7 years is a lot. It feels like loosing a true friend, someone important. But some day it will get better, let’s us all remember it. 

“ There is a sadness in this world, for we are ignorant of many things. Yes, we are ignorant of many beautiful things - things like the truth. So sadness, in our ignorance, is very real. The tears are real.  Then the day when the sadness comes - then we ask: "Will this sadness which makes me cry - will this sadness that makes me cry my heart out - will it ever end?" The answer, of course, is yes. One day the sadness will end”. The Log Lady, Twin Peaks.

Goodbye Petyr Baelish.

Thank you Aidan Gillen. 

[yoon-kooks]

Beginner’s Luck

Pairing: Seokjin x Reader

Summary: You were never a believer in online dating, but things weren’t exactly working out offline either. So what was it that you were missing?

Genre: Fluff, Gamer!AU

Word Count: 3.5k

Prompt: “Can I kiss you?” (request by anon)

You laid on your bed staring at your phone screen, mindlessly swiping left. Your best guy friend, Jungkook, had suggested you try out some dating apps since meeting people face-to-face was a bit difficult for a shy snowflake like yourself.

It had been a few hours since Jungkook had set up an account for you, but you had yet to find someone who really caught your eye. Not that looks were all that important to you anyway. If anything, you’d prefer not to see their face and just get to know their personality instead.

“You might as well deactivate your account if you have no intentions of swiping right,” Jungkook glanced over at you before turning back to his laptop screen, ��Shit, I just died.”

“I just don’t get how meeting someone online could ever work,” you rolled over to see what your friend had “died” in. All you saw were a bunch of little anime characters running around attacking a giant fish that literally took up half the screen. “I haven’t seen this game before… Is it new?”

“Ya! It came out a few days ago and I’ve been hooked ever since!” The boy clicked something to revive his character and travelled back to where you assumed the giant fish was. “You should play too since I haven’t made too many friends yet!”

“What about Tae?” You tried to avoid getting yourself involved in Jungkook’s gaming addiction by name-dropping the other gamer in your friend group.

“Nah, I asked him but he’s too busy playing Overwatch,” Jungkook shrugged. “The boy’s an addict, I tell ya.” You rolled your eyes at the biggest addict you knew.

“Well what about the people you met in the game?”

“There’s this one guy, Jinnamon, who goes to the same school as us, and I actually met up with him the other day in person.” The boy cursed under his breath after dying again. “He’s a pretty cool dude, but he kept making weird dad jokes.”

“If that’s your only complaint, he can’t be that bad, right?”

“I suppose…” Jungkook finally just flipped his laptop over and rage-quit after dying for a third time. “I GIVE UP. Here, if you don’t wanna make your own account, just use mine because I’m 100% done with this shit. It’s a stupid game anyway.” You snickered at the boy’s childish temper because you knew he’d be back online after a few hours of boredom. But in the meantime, you decided to check out the game that had gotten him all fired up.

It wasn't just a fighting game, you learned. There were also little mini games and quests you could do with other people, and also places just for chatting. You walked around the town where most people gathered for a little while and then headed to where you thought the giant fish was. It took you about ten minutes to find it, but once you did, you started hitting random buttons on the keyboard to use all different types of magic on the fish. And before you knew it, the fish had been slayed so you picked up the fish bone that dropped. You didn’t understand why a veteran gamer like Jungkook had had such a hard time defeating the monster when it had been so easy for a newbie like yourself. But what were you supposed to do next??

“Hey Kookie?” You tapped the shoulder of the boy who had fallen asleep on your bed, but he was out. Probably because he had stayed up all night playing the game. Not wanting to interrupt his sleep, you decided to ask someone else.

You searched for some kind of messaging system within the game, and once you did, you realized you were only able to message people on your friend list. Since Jungkook had specifically mentioned that Jinnamon guy, you clicked on his name to start a chat.

Nochu: “um hi”

Jinnamon: “oh its u again”

Jinnamon: “i thought u left me lol”

Nochu: “no that was my friend ^^;; he didnt like your dad jokes lol”

Jinnamon: “wait ur friend? u mean jungkook? who r u then o.o?”

Nochu: “Y/N”

Jinnamon: “o im seokjin btw but just call me jin ok”

Nochu: “lol i understand your username now. thats cute😹”

Jinnamon: “rlly? most ppl hate my puns LIKE UR FRIEND”

Nochu: “wowow someones salty hehe”

Jinnamon: “im NOT”

Nochu: “you kinda are /:”

Jinnamon: “ANYWAY. why is a peasant like u speaking to me?”

Nochu: “peasant???”

Jinnamon: “obviously knights like me are superior to mages like u”

Nochu: “i dont really know what youre talking about but okay???”

Jinnamon: “wow what a noob”

Nochu: “gtg bye”

Jinnamon: “WAIT. im just kidding! rlly. what do u need?”

Nochu: “i killed a fish and idk what to do???”

Jinnamon: “lol what fish?”

Nochu: “the big one in the cave that takes up like half the screen? idk what its called”

Jinnamon: “wHAT”

Nochu: “???”

Jinnamon: “pics or it didnt happen”

Nochu: “what pics?? all i have is this fish bone item???”

Jinnamon: “tHATS THE QUEST ITEM OMFG U RLLY DID KILL IT WTF”

Nochu: “what do i do with it?????”

Jinnamon: “give it to me of course lol”

Nochu: “how do i do that?”

Jinnamon: “omg u rlly r a noob”

Nochu: “what?? ive never played this before!! how am i supposed to know??”

Jinnamon: “first of all the trading option is on the bottom right of the screen”

Jinnamon: “and second dont just give away ur quest items to strangers lol”

Jinnamon: “so now that we cleared that up, what r u gonna do with the fish bone?”

Nochu: “give it to u???”

Jinnamon: “omfg no… ur hopeless”

Jinnamon: “i guess i have no choice but to take u under my wing”

Jinnamon: “can we meet up?”

Nochu: “like in person??????”

Jinnamon: “ya its easier to explain this stuff in person”

You thought about it for a moment. Jungkook did say he met up with this Seokjin guy before and that he was a pretty cool dude from your university, so it was safe to assume he wasn’t a creeper at the very least.

Nochu: “okay lets meet in front of the school library in an hour?”

Jinnamon: “got it~ ill send u my number so we can text”

You logged out of the game and packed Jungkook’s laptop into your bag. Honestly, you were beyond nervous about meeting Seokjin in person. While you were fairly comfortable with keeping up a conversation with him in the game, you weren’t sure how things would go outside of that environment. But you reminded yourself that the two of you would have the game to talk about, so there was no reason to worry about any awkward silences.

You glanced at the mirror to check your outfit before scolding yourself for making it seem like a date. Just as you walked out of your apartment, you silently said bye to Jungkook who was still dead asleep.

It was a sunny day on campus, a nice change from the darkness in your room that Jungkook loved to play his games in. When you reached the library, you scanned the area for an empty bench to sit on as you waited. But thanks to your luck, all the benches were occupied with at least one person. Of course, there was still room for you to sit next to someone, but the thought of that gave you butterflies.

Just when you were about to take a seat on the brick wall instead, you noticed a lone boy sitting at one end of one of the longer benches. If you sat there, it probably wouldn’t be so bad since there would be a fair amount of space between you and the boy. So you approached the bench.

“Um, excuse me, is it okay if I sit here?” You stared at the boy who was significantly more attractive up close than from a distance. He definitely stood out with his broad shoulders and his more than handsome face with beautifully plump pink lips.

“Yeah, go ahead,” the boy nodded, “I’m just waiting for someone.”

“Oh, me too,” you smiled at his adorable choppy bangs before taking a seat at the opposite end of the bench. Who knew such a stunning boy existed at your school?

You checked the time on your phone and saw that you were about five minutes early. Rather than text Seokjin immediately, you decided to wait a bit so he wouldn’t feel rushed.

To kill time, your eyes began to wander. Your campus was known for its breathtaking scenery, but somehow all you wanted to look at was the choppy bangs boy. He was looking down at his phone, texting away. You wondered who he was waiting for. A date maybe? The only thing that snapped you out of your daze was the vibration of your phone.

2:02PM Seokjin “im here~”

2:03PM noob “me too lol”

2:04PM noob “wait where??”

2:05PM noob “i just realized i have no idea what you look like lmao”

2:06PM Seokjin “im sitting on one of the benches”

You noticed Choppy Bangs looking up from his phone and scanning the area.

2:07PM noob “uhh… youre not the guy sitting next to me right lol”

2:08PM noob “the guy with the choppy bangs?”

2:08PM Seokjin “…”

2:09PM noob “oh shit it IS you o.o”

“What do you mean ‘oh shit’??” Choppy Bangs turned to you and made some kind of a squeaky windshield wiper sound with his laugh. “And they’re not choppy bangs!”

“Sorry!” you giggled. “So you’re really Jin?? I didn’t expect you to look like that.” You were still in shock that you were the lucky person the handsome boy had been waiting for.

“Like what?” Seokjin raised an eyebrow at you. “I swear, Jungkook said the same exact thing when he saw me for the first time. Like, am I really that handsome?”

You just nodded, trying not to laugh. Maybe he came off a bit strong, but as a shy person yourself, you actually really envied how he embraced his good looks and spoke so comfortably around you. “Shall we go inside, then?”

The two of you made your way into the library and found an empty table next to the window. Rather than sit across from you, Seokjin took the seat right next to you. But it made sense since he needed to show you how to play the game properly.

“Was that really the first time you played this game?” Seokjin asked with big eyes as he brought out his laptop from his bag.

“Ya, I swear!” You took out Jungkook’s laptop and waited for the game to load. When you were presented with the log-in screen, you realized you made a grave mistake. You had no idea what Jungkook’s password was.

After logging into his own account, Seokjin stared at your confused expression for a second and picked up on your problem. All he did was make his squeaky laughing sounds.

With bright red cheeks, you called your friend and prayed that he would pick up to tell you his password. Otherwise, what was the point of meeting up with Seokjin? You’d feel terrible if you made him come all this way only for you to be locked out of Jungkook’s account.

But of course, Jungkook didn’t pick up. He was probably still fast asleep and wouldn’t wake up for who knows how long. So you sent him a text instead in hopes that he would get the message some time soon.

“He better reply quickly,” you groaned.

“Well, in the meantime,” Seokjin slid his laptop in front of you. “Show me how you killed the fish~”

“What? You still don’t believe me?” you smirked.

“Well considering you can’t even get past the log-in screen, no, I don’t believe you.”

“Okay you have a point hehe,” you smiled as you looked at Seokjin’s character, which also coincidentally had his same choppy bangs. You pressed a few buttons, but rather than magic attacks like Jungkook’s character, you were swinging a sword around. “Hey, this is different from Jungkook’s guy.”

“That’s because I’m a knight and he’s a mage!!” Seokjin shook his head at you. “Didn’t I explain this already?”

“Yeah, but I don’t know what the fuck knights and mages are!” you pouted, shoving the boy next to you.

“That’s because you’re a noob,” he teased, giving you a light shove back.

“At least I could kill the fish thing!” You moved Seokjin’s character back to the giant fish’s cave and waited for it to spawn.

“Hmm, we’ll see.” And with that, the giant fish appeared. You jumped around and swung your sword, but it was a lot more difficult to control a knight. Just when the fish’s health bar was lowered to the red, you fell victim to one of its attacks where it literally threw up water in your face. A tombstone dropped and Seokjin’s character became a ghost.

“Omg look! You died! You’re a ghost~” you giggled, pointing at Seokjin’s floating character.

“Listen, the fish was supposed to die, not me,” the boy chuckled at your innocence.

“Sorry I couldn’t get you the fish bone though…” You made duck lips and tilted your head in Seokjin’s direction.

“That’s alright,” he patted your head. “You’re not bad for a noob.”

“Stop calling me a noob! You’re the noob~” You grabbed his hand off your head and started pulling at his fingers. “What do you need the fish bone for anyway? Can you become rich and famous with it?”

“You just give it to some witch for a quest. It’s a pretty useless item actually,” he shrugged.

“What! I thought it was important!” you whined. “I thought I was really cool for defeating the fish!! You made me feel special!!”

“I mean, you were the first to kill it, so that’s pretty cool, right?” Seokjin swatted at your annoying hands that were still tugging on his so he could properly entwine his fingers with yours.

“I guess…” You were starting to feel a bit foolish for thinking you were some hotshot after killing some fish in a video game, but Seokjin was really making you feel extra special with the way he held your hand so gently. And you didn’t want it to end.

Buzz! You jumped at the sudden vibration in your pocket. Whoever sent that text better have had a really good reason for interrupting your moment.

3:34PM Kookie “my password is ilyjustin”

3:35PM Kookie “wait why do you need my password?”

3:36PM Kookie “wait where the fuck is my laptop?”

3:38PM Y/N “i have it lmao”

3:39PM Kookie “???”

3:39PM Kookie “dont break my baby”

3:40PM Kookie “oh god its too early in the morning for this shit”

3:41PM Kookie “good night”

You put your phone away, a little upset that Jungkook had ended up responding so quickly. Things had been going surprisingly well without Seokjin even teaching you how to play the game. You just felt good around the boy.

“I guess I can log into Jungkook’s account now…” You flipped the laptop screen up and began inputting the password, but Seokjin was quick to put a halt to your typing.

“Maybe we should take a break?” He got up and stretched before extending a hand out to you. “We can always play online later, right?”

You nodded and took his hand into your own before you had the chance to chicken out. “So where are we going?”

“Have any suggestions?” He swung your hand back and forth. You had to take a moment to think, but there actually was a place you had been dying to visit. And the only reason why you hadn’t gone there yet was because you had no one to go with. But now you did.

“The aquarium!” Your eyes sparkled. “I wanna see big fish!”

“Like the one you slaughtered and then got slaughtered by?” The windshield wiper laugh came out again. It was a sound you were growing really fond of.

“Yeah~ Can we go?” You looked up to Seokjin, who smiled back at you.

“Sure~”

-

“Oooh! Jin, look!!” You repeatedly tapped the boy’s shoulder until he turned to the flat, gliding creature you were pointing at in the tank. “It’s cute, right?”

“You think stingrays are cute?” he asked. “You have really weird taste, ya know that?”

“I like most fish, okay?” you pouted and crossed your arms like a child. “All of them excep-” You cut yourself off and took a step away from the tank when you saw a giant grey and white fish with rows and rows of dangerously sharp teeth staring right at you. “Except that.” You hid behind Seokjin and peeked out from his broad shoulders.

“Aww I thought you wanted to see big fish?” he teased.

“But not a shark!!” You clung to the back of his flannel, shaking as you kept an eye on the great white.

Suddenly, Seokjin’s large hand wrapped around yours as your heartbeat slowed and returned to its normal pace. It wasn’t hard to feel safe in his hands. “Let’s go look for other big fish, yeah?”

“Okay…” You were still pouty, but you really enjoyed holding his hand. It just felt so natural and right. And you appreciated how much Seokjin was trying to make sure you were comfortable.

The next room you walked into was darker than the rest. You stayed as close as you could to Seokjin in case any shark wanted to jump out at you, even though you were well aware that that was physically impossible.

Your eyes grew big and your mouth formed a big O when you looked at the glowing tank in the center of the room.

“You like jellyfish too?” The boy chuckled at the curiosity in your eyes.

You only nodded. The way the jellies flowed and glowed so effortlessly in the water felt unreal. Almost as unreal as the fact that you were genuinely falling for a boy you had just met online. And you needed a moment to let all your feelings sink in.

“Hey, Jin?”

“Yeah?”

“What did you think of me when I first talked to you online?”

“I thought you were a noob. And it turns out, you really are one.” He leaned his head on your shoulder. You elbowed his stomach. “But I also thought you were pretty cute and innocent. Turns out I was right about that too.”

“Really?” You looked up to the boy with your puppy eyes. “Because to be honest, I didn’t expect you to be cute at all~”

“What!”

“But I’ll admit I was wrong~” you giggled. “You’re super handsome and nice, and I really liked spending time with you, and-”

Seokjin cut you off with a warm embrace. Your whole body felt the heat radiating from the boy’s chest. He’d make an excellent snuggle buddy, your pure and innocent mind noted. “Today was fun,” he spoke into your ear.

“It was!” You gave the boy a huge smile as your eyes wandered right onto his plush pink lips. There was only one more thing that could make the day any better. “Can I kiss you~?”

The next moment, you felt his lips pressed up against yours. You had thought nothing would feel better than holding his hand, but the sensation of your lips locking with his was more than enough to solidify everything. You had found the one.

Just earlier that morning, you were swiping left on some dating app, doubtful that meeting someone online would ever result in a relationship or love. Four hours ago, you were fighting some stupid fish. Three hours ago, you were insulted by some boy calling you a noob. Two hours ago, you met that same boy in person. An hour ago, you accidentally turned his character into a ghost. And just now, you kissed him as if a spark had gone off somewhere in your heart. It was never that meeting someone face-to-face was difficult, or that online dating was a hoax. It was just that you hadn’t found the right boy until that very moment.

You just had one hope as your lips parted with his. When you left the aquarium, when you went back to playing that silly online game, or when you decided to quit the game because it was kind of boring, you only hoped your relationship with Seokjin would continue to bloom, both online and off.

“Hey! We never found the big fish!!” you cried, walking out of the darkness of the aquarium and into the brightness of the setting sun.

“Oh shit you’re right…” Seokjin stroked his imaginary beard. “Okay, here’s a question to make you feel better.”

You tilted your head with a confused look.

“Are we… o-fish-ally dating?” You weren’t sure if you were laughing because the joke was so terrible, because the windshield wiper laugh came out once more, or simply because you were with the boy you loved.

“I suppose we are,” you giggled, wrapping your arms tightly around Seokjin as he planted a kiss on your forehead. “And by the way, I was kind of waiting for you to drop a dad joke all day.”

“Sorry to keep you waiting!”

“It’s okay, let’s just go and fight the other big fish together~” You gave him one last peck on the cheek before heading home, hand in hand.

A/N: Shoutout to any og maplers who caught my pianus reference LMAO~