#that's a bit of whiplash if I'm being honest

[greenwriterplaidbow]

anymore for memory loss!reader?? absolutely LOVED that fic 🥰

I do in fact have more! Uhh thank you for your patience, I started working on this when you sent it but I left it half done because of finals. But it's done now! It's shorter and more of a prequel of the first fic. You can read about the tragic accident here!

I have revised it because I thought I could do better, especially after a very helpful comment from @vofriviasblog (I can't thank you enough, you have given me much inspiration)

I'm trying to push myself to write the argument itself better. It feels so uncomfortable to write. I highly dislike conflict and everytime I write something with anger behind it I just feel like I hear my own father through the characters. So. (Sorry if that's trauma dumping on main). Needless to say I'm struggling with it. But I'm getting better! I feel a little bit like I'd rather be eating my own arm but that's okay. Being uncomfortable means you can grow, right?

[bigassmoonchild]

Lost

Pairing: Logan Howlett x Reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Summary: It's not the first time you've plummeted into another timeline. It is the first time in years that you've met a Deadpool still doing the anti-hero (vigilante?) thing. And unfortunately for you, you're stuck with him.

Content Tags: DEADPOOL AND WOLVERINE SPOILERS! I'm being so serious, this entire series is going to be stock-full of spoilers for that movie. Some mentions of blood, lots of cursing (as expected). No use of Y/N

A/N: I promise I'm working on stuff, work just has had me super busy the last few weeks (months if I'm being more honest) and school is coming up soon for me :(. Anyways. I wanna lick Logans abs. This is hopefully gonna be a slow burn ;)

(p.s. lmk if you wanna be added to a tag list in the future)

(p.p.s. this is mostly story building with a tad bit of plot)

(p.p.p.s. i'm trying to write in a less past tense style, forgive if that changes throughout the story, im so fuckin delirious)

It’s jarring. Every single time it happens is so jarring. It’s almost like getting whiplashed with how hard you are pulled backwards and then your stomach drops; it feels as though you’re falling. The same sensation you get right before you fall asleep, like your body can’t tell if you’re still alive.  

You’ve never been thrown so forcefully out of it. Usually you land, stumbling on your feet. This time, though, you’re thrown onto your back. Your skull cracks against the pavement underneath you and it feels like all the air has been forced out of your body.  

“Fuuuuck,” it feels pushed out of your body, your chest heaving in short gasps. Rolling onto your side, all you can see in front of you is the street. Whatever Earth you’ve landed on, it doesn’t seem like it’s good.  

There’s blood splattered everywhere, cars and buses are on their sides or flipped over. Glass is scattered on the streets. Maybe you just arrived right after the battle of New York, maybe this world has been abandoned.  

You struggle to your feet, stumbling and catching yourself before standing fully upright. You can feel the warmth of some blood on your back before the skin reconnects, leaving behind the burn of cement rash.  

Behind you, there’s panting. It’s heavy and sounds almost wet. Turning, you look at two men who were behind you. 

“Oh, you’ve got to be fucking kidding me,”  

... 

You tried walking away. Removing yourself from the situation like the adult you were, but no. It wasn’t working. You never got more than a few feet away from the two before being teleported back within their range.  

The two men, Deadpool and the poor Wolverine stuck with him, just watched for some time. Deadpool was oddly quiet through most of it, although you can almost hear the monologue in his thoughts, his head following as you walked in different directions before snapping to where you appeared. Dogpool, the ugly thing, sat in the arms of its alternate person just panting heavily. It never stopped panting.  

You huff angrily, throwing your back against the wall right next to Wade. Crossing your arms, you look down at Mary Puppins sitting in his arms. She went cross eyed while looking up at you, staring blankly at the wall next to you and yourself.  

“Who shit in your biscuit this morning?” Wade asks you, head tilting slightly. You have to brace yourself and breathe deeply to make sure you don’t roll your eyes. You never realized how thankful you were that your home Earths Deadpool ended up in the void before you even knew what abilities you had.  

Glancing down at him with just your eyes, you find that he still hasn’t looked away. “Whoever the hell sent me here, that’s who,” you respond. There’s pain in your voice, you can hear up, but also the utter annoyance that most Deadpool's just bring. “Didn’t know the Wolverine on this world was still alive,” you nod your head towards Logan like you’re gesturing to him.  

It’s quiet. You’ve somehow silenced Wade Wilson, the merc with a mouth. You watch his chest expand in a deep inhale and it caves back in as he exhales deeply.  

“He isn’t,” and your brows furrow. Other than the TVA, you don’t know any other casual dimension jumper. Even they were a stretch, you know, they didn’t deserve to be able to do that.  Somehow, they were able to master it. You think he can see the confusion on your face as your eyes flit back and forth between them. Logan’s still eating whatever it is he had in his hand. “The TVA,” he takes a breath, and you have to interrupt. 

“Why did they bring him here?” You shake your head, brows furrowing further.  

Wade shifts his head side to side. “They didn’t bring him here, sunshine,” his voice perks up. “I did,” and he has the widest smile on his face that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.  

“I don’t,” you pause and rub your face, looking down at the ground. “I don’t even wanna know why or how,”  

“’Cause I'm Marvel Jesus,” is his quick quip back. He stands suddenly, his back popping and cracking as he stretches himself. “Alrighty, Peanut, let’s get going home,” he says to Logan (maybe it was to Mary Puppins, you’ve got no idea), and there’s a little pep in his step. “C’mon puppy!” Wade calls and you get yanked again and appear just a few feet ahead of him.  

With a roll of his eyes, Logan stands and tosses his food off to the side. “I’m going to go figure things out on my own,” he says. Turning away, you watch as Logan walks off from the two of you and you hope to whatever being is out there that you get pulled along with him, but he isn’t able to make it more than a few steps before Wade starts talking again. 

“Oh no you don’t! I’ve waited far too long for this meetup!” Wade calls out, and you see Logan stop in his tracks. His shoulders slump, almost like he’s struggling with a decision he’s about to make. “Blind Al isn’t all she’s cocained up to be, we need a third in our little house of horrors,” he snickers a little. 

You’re really hoping it doesn’t last forever, but when you finally make the trek to Wades apartment that feeling almost vanishes (almost). It’s homey, although the apartment itself is small and cramped with two people already there. You’ve met a few Als before, but only a small number of them weren’t blind. 

It was only in passing though. You could recognize that woman anywhere. Her eyes were always a striking feature, and the few who weren’t blind always carried this sort of knowledge within them as they followed you when you walked by them.  

This Al seemed sweet, although listening to Wade tell you about her was a little odd. You couldn’t fully tell if he was joking about her being able to see cocaine, but there’s been worse you’ve interacted with.  

Speaking of worse, Logan would not let you out of his sight at all thus far. You could feel his eyes boring down on your back the entire walk to the apartment, and even when you got inside and completely ignored everything Wade was saying (a lot of it was just telling you and Logan about the apartment and what to not touch, oddly enough) he would not let you leave his sight.  

Even just checking out what type of T.V this world had to offer left you with his stare. You begin to browse their small selection of DVD’s when you finally speak up. 

“Might wanna take a picture,” it was quiet, but you knew he could hear you. “It’ll last you longer,” but there was no response. Usually, it was the Bucky Barnes of the Earth that had the staring problem, it had never been the Wolverines.  

They always made their problems with you obvious. They’d never pulled this type of behavior, and it was strange. For the first time in years, you had someone act strange and you couldn’t figure out how to go about confronting it.  

“Who’re you?” Logan finally spoke up, quieting Wade in the middle of his rant.  

You swallow thickly. “I’m not the person you think I am,” and you cringe internally. It always sounded dumb when you said it, but you never knew what else to say. Who knows if there’s another you in this world, or maybe even Logans. “Whoever I am, or was, to you? That’s not who I am,” but you’d never met another one of you.  

There’s the thud of glass on wood, it's thick and there’s no way that it isn’t a beer bottle.  “I’ve never met you in my life. Have you?” Assuming he was talking to Wade, you turn as best as you can while still crouched in front of the TV to look at him.  

He’s shrugging, opening his mouth for a response before Logan beats him to it. “What the hell is it that you can do, anyways? Are you a mutant? Or just another fucked up creation by a government?” You bark a laugh.  

“I’m just one of God’s fucked up mistakes, that’s what,” and you look down with a sigh, shaking your head. “I really don’t know. My world didn’t have mutants, not like others do. It was always some botched work done by doctors in basements,” Wade looks appalled.  

His eyes find some spot on the wall, and he smiles at it. “It’s like looking into a mirror. Although a lot less ballsackey and not as interesting,” you have to shake your head.  

Logan clears his throat. “What do you mean, your world didn’t have mutants,” you smile at him.  

“My timeline doesn’t exist anymore,”  

[welovetesvkaidan]

OPINIONS ON KAIDAN EE/IF???

My honest reaction:

in all seriousness, if you wanna hear me yap about it, more under the cut

warning like, genuinely a ginormous yap, like a HUMUNGOUS, sleep-deprived yap,,, im cursed to be obsessed with skyrim + modded followers instead of touching grass

I think a lot of this is probably gonna be the same thing other people have said, so im sorry

if you feel i'm gonna be bringing up redundant points and get mad at me😓dont read

I haven't experienced and thus won't talk about the versions of EE and IF that are now separate mods from each other. I don't know anything about that.

if they're better now yayyy but this is about pre-separation

I should preface this with the fact that I've played through Skyrim 3 times with different stages of Kaidan EE/IF:

The initial Dawnguard + fixes/miscs mod

Kaidan EE/IF versions before extensive faction/NPC dialogue for Kaidan

EE/IF w/ NPC Dialogue (AKA Fratpack)

I was also part of the two different discords that were purged and created during these intervals. i don't even know if there is a discord currently?

anyway, that is to say that I have experienced the mod and it's behind-the-scenes progress, extensively so I have a pretty good idea of what I liked and didn't like

That being said, I will introduce probably my biggest problems with it: Tonal whiplash

Okay, well the most common complaint is ofc that a lot of the writing is out of character - and I agree. But it's not just ooc on paper, it's his voice too. I swear, it is very jarring hearing hushed, mild og Kaidan 2 voicelines, and then being deafened by EE Kaidan SCREAMING in my ear ALL.THE.TIME. (like... why are you yelling at me rn jeez)

Seriously. I'm not sure why they didn't just re-record everything from the original mod instead of adding more and more contradicting lines on top of the originals. It definitely could have been a standalone mod, and sometimes it almost feels like it is - because he is just so different.

My most infamous moment in my last playthrough with him happened after we defeated the dragon at Kynesgrove. His og Kaidan 2 dialogue played first, in it he shows interest and is cordial about Delphine ("I wouldn't mind prodding her mind" or whatver dialogue), THEN immediately after his Kaidan EE/IF dialogue will play, in which he walks up to Delphine and STARTS YELLING AT HER AND INSULTING HER - like they argue for quite a bit wtf. And it's like, listen, I have my thoughts about Delphine, but whether or not it was okay to yell at her isn't the problem. It would be fine - IF he hadn't just calmly told me he thought she was okay.

It is sooo confusing how he contradicts himself :(

I mean, yeah, fragments of who he is are still there, I can tell it's Kaidan, but he's warped to fit a different character. Like a con-artist Kaidan.

Anyway, besides the contradictions, it also feels out of character because of his established backstory.

Let's go over it: He's an orphan, lost his only connection to his family(his guardian) to drugs, fell into substances himself, joined a violent cult, had to escape said cult, came clean from his addictions, has been traveling Tamriel bounty-hunting, got brutally attacked by the Thalmor, rescued by mere chance. Do you honestly mean to tell me this man would be yelling, pissing, drinking, lewding, and joking his ass off?? After all that???? NO - or maybe not these levels of extreme. (maybe some other dude might, but Kaidan's characterization insists he is a brooding, keeps-to-himself man, even though he never acts like it anymore)

That man should be tired, and he did feel like he was tired in the original. He was more brooding then than he is now, usually silent, but could still have an edge of comedy/wittiness, he was smart, he had been through a lot!

In that regard, EE/IF Kaidan felt like... we are experiencing Kaidan 10 years in the past - like a Kaidan in his early 20s when he was still a drunkard low-key terrible person. He is just so energetic, always yapping - GOD he talks a lot now. ugh but most of the time it wasn't about anything, it was either inside-jokes, meta jokes, and only occasionally did we get things that added to the experience.

For example, I think most of us who have played Kaidan 2 remember at least one specific line he has said while exploring. What comes to mind for me is either "Can you smell the magicka in the air too? Smells like a rainless thunderstorm." or "Watch for the mammoth with the carvings on their tusks, that's how the giants mark their herd." Alright, both pretty nice small talk for characterization (he IS smart) and worldbuilding.

Tbh i can't really remember any iconic lines from the additions of EE/IF Kaidan... the only two lines that stood out for me were: the "elevenses" line from the clip above (started bumping into him every time he was about to say this so he would stfu... total tonal dissonance), and one he said while I looted Lucky Lorenz ("poor sod wasn't as lucky as his namesake would have you believe!") kai HOW do you know this man, and his nickname, who told you that??? (idc about it that much but its like the only other added line i remember)

I thought that maybe his ooc-iness might have been caused due to the collaborative approach of the mod, I think the mod authors created their own perfect Kaidan - and that's good for them! It takes a shit ton of work (Ik cuz i was there!!) But I think the original essence was lost with each addition. It might have been lack of direction for the voice acting too, a lot of the lines might have hit better if they weren't borderline screamed.

Okay, at some point while playing I got so tired of his constant himbo chit-chatter that I tried tuning him out and bringing other npcs from vanilla skyrim as followers. Problem: even without kaidan on your party, everything starts being about kaidan. Because the extension made it so that Kaidan either has history with/character interactions and development with different NPCs from the base game.

The main poor sods that traveled with me:

Erik the Slayer: Apparently was Kaidan's childhood friend, got inspired by Kaidan to become an adventurer. Least egregious in my opinion, they say sweet things to each other. I swear, Kaidan yells more at me than he ever did at Erik.

The Companions: dumb, dumber, and dumbest basically.. This part of EE/IF was also known as "The Fratpack" and y e a h they pretty much had Vilkas, Kaidan, and Farkas acting like immature frat boys all the time. Just,, absulutely taking away all the maturity out of these GROWN ASS MEN. im sorry, i guess i dont get the appeal. I liked it when they didn't behave like teens (Aela im so sorry, you deserved better than being part of this)

Lydia: All she does is simp for him, ALL.THE.TIME. You think she's about to have a meaningful thing to say? nope, she's checking out Kaidan's ass. Think she'll have a deep convo with another npc about one another? nope! she wants them to tell her all about Kaidan. Both the Companions and Erik will either talk down to her or have to deal with her thirst for Kaidan. i had to start leaving her home.

They also suffered from the same tonal whiplash as Kaidan, unfortunately

additionally, the mod added an "early flirt switch" - you could basically toggle Kaidan to start showing romantic affection for the Dragonborn before the amulet of mara., the interactions were good on paper, but everytime he stammered and stumbled over his words it was written in such an unnatural way... pls people don't talk like fanfics lol !!!

I did like that he gave me flowers, my inventory got full of them - but then he noticed how many flowers I had in my inventory and judged me for "picking everything i see" ugh dude you gave them to me, but also even if you hadnt... mind your business lol

Another addition was a feature that basically made it so NPCs could potentially throw flirtatious comments at Kaidan and the Dragonborn (Bishop flashbacks😨)

You can't do anything to defend Kaidan from those comments, but he WILL take it upon himself to defend your honor infront of any men, women, jarls, or criminals that even so much as find you attractive (THIS INCLUDES FARKAS AND VILKAS BTW :( ) by being rude, forthcoming, AND violent. so yea, you can guess the target audience

speaking of which, he definitely comes on too strong on you once you start the romance, and it left a bad taste in my mouth. I specifically picked the "go slow" option for the romance, and the next day or two it was him constantly complaining about having to go slow under his breath, how he wanted to do anything but slow rn... and like just, wow. :/ yikeees lmao

Maybe this is the result of "i can fix him" romance ideals? im sorry but I liked him when he was down to earth

Bonus? He comes with a campsite now, which has to be magic because its ginormous and he somehow lugs it around despite it also coming with a whole ass furnace (fine fine i'll hold my disbelief)

anyway I do like it, its basically a player house you can take anywhere (so long as kai is with you ig) also you can have a cat in there

I like that there is an MCM, I like that the MCM lets you get through the quest stages in case you get stuck

I like that he can guide you places, usually he gets stuck in a tree or rock but its the thought that counts

I think if the mod had continued in the vein as its original iteration when it was just audio/bug fixes and included these qol features it would have been better than it is now.

But it seems maybe i'm just not the target audience, and as a young woman I'm really confused as who the target audience is 😓

okay im srry rant over

if anyone else wants me to yap about other kaidan skyrim things also ask or join in cuz i like yapping about skyrim and kaidan to people!!!

[someonexsomeone]

Bus Boy

Title: Bus Boy

Author: SomeonexSomeone

Word Count: 2.5k

Pairing: NonSorcerer!Megumi Fushiguro x np!Reader

Summary: There's a really cute guy on your bus ride.

Authors Note: completely inspired by Laufey's "Beautiful Stranger"! okay listen listen listen I know Laufeyfest is over but I love this song sm and I'm sad I didn't put it on the official list so like just think about this as a spin-off type deal okay?

There's a really cute guy on your bus ride. Like, not just a fleeting, ‘eyes skimmed and appreciated and moved on’, but more of a ‘eyes skimmed, couldn’t comprehend what it saw, near whiplash to make sure I’m seeing what I’m seeing’ cute. He wasn’t looking at anyone near him, but the way he fluidly moved with the bus and the people around him made it clear he was more observant than his relaxed stance appeared. He was looking out the window, the sun shining just right on his face so every sharp angle was highlighted, his eyes sparkling as they watched the passing scenery. Eyelashes long enough to question if they were real or not barely fluttered as things whipped by, and didn’t move in any way to indicate he knew you were staring (which was impressive because you had been staring at him for just a tad bit too long at this point, and oh god, why won’t you look away? This has to be getting weird right?). His hair was dorky in an endearing way, spiked up in all directions, though it didn’t look like he had to use any product to get it that way. Effortless, just like the rest of him. 

You were rather reluctant to come all the way out to the countryside for your summer vacation. To be completely honest, you nearly burst into tears when your parents decided you would go help out your grandparents for the summer, needing to ship you away while they went to whatever new conference they needed to attend. Plans that had been in the works for months suddenly went down the drain, and there was nothing you could do about it. You loved your grandparents, you really did, and their adorable farm on the outskirts was often a great place to get away and relive old memories. But, to be honest, there hasn’t been anything fun to do down there in years. You were older now, nearly the age where you would set out on your own adventure with all the freedoms and restrictions adulthood provided, which meant that you were much too old to be digging around in muddy creeks to look for frogs, or dressing up in ridiculous outfits to entertain your grandparents’ many friends. Both of those memories forced a shiver up your spine. If they made you reenact The Princess and the Frog again…

That was what most of the bus ride had consisted of, reliving old memories and having to physically stop your face from contorting by squeezing your hands together, until just as you were pulling into the town center, the cutest guy you had ever seen sat right across from you without warning. Your long stare was interrupted by his very being, and the way the sun haloed his head almost made you question if you were witnessing a real encounter with an angel on Earth. To be fair, you were sleep-deprived, barely managing to hop on this bus before it left the train station, bag being hastily shoved back together when it popped open from the force of your desperate attempt to get aboard. A complete mess, for lack of a better description. And here was some guy at… 5:30 am (?!?) looking like he was one wardrobe change away from walking down the runway. He definitely caught your eye, to which you hastily looked away, trying as hard as you could to will the universe into help you this one time in making the cutest guy you’ve ever seen not remember the person who made a fool of themselves by ogling at him with drool dried to the side of their face. 

Now you think the universe listened a little too hard. Of all the things to really pay attention to, it had to be your wish to be forgotten by Bus Boy (Vehicle Man? Beautiful Stranger? Hot Farmer? Angel Guy? You had yet to come up with a good enough name to describe him), and not any of the other countless wishes you made before getting onto that fateful bus. You’re a little embarrassed to admit, but ever since that original meeting, you’ve been trying to get a second chance at a first impression. Any errand your grandparents needed to do, you were the first to volunteer. Grocery shopping, delivering or picking up from friends, even going as far as going back to the train station to pick up an emergency order, all to get a glimpse at your cute Bus Boy. It was even expected at this point, no one asking before dumping something in your hands with the shared bus pass placed on top. It was mortifying the teasing that came with it now, most of your family, and their friends, figuring someone was the reason why you were too excited to head into town, despite the many, many excuses you came up with to justify your actions (you were pretty proud of yourself for some of them, but, alas, your family is too romantic to want to believe anything else). 

In the least creepy way possible, and with a lot of trial and error (which is also definitely not creepy), you were starting to notice a pattern in his daily routine. He rode the bus at an ungodly hour in the morning, seeming to head from the larger town to the farmland on the outskirts, getting on long before you would and a handful of stops before you, which made it difficult to see him then. In the afternoons, it seemed like he was the same type of errand boy you were, whether by choice or not you weren’t sure, but he rarely carried anything with him and it was a completely random chance that you would see him. At night, or, really, around sunset, he would be on the bus headed back towards the town, seemingly going home. 

This seemingly random schedule, and the complete opposite nature of your bus routes, made it nearly as hard to avoid him as it was to see him. It seemed almost karma in nature the way he would always show up on days you weren’t feeling your best, just trying to get in and out or not bothering to put any effort into your appearance, and those instances where you were feeling great, on top of the world in confidence, he was nowhere to be seen. 

Which is, of course, how you ended up here, staring (gawking) at him on the hottest day of the year. This had to be the ultimate punishment, all that complaining from the beginning of summer and the secret wish you had that something, anything, would prevent you from being forced to the outskirts of civilization topped with the fact that you’re kinda sorta stalking this guy who, let’s be real, has no clue you exist. 

It was the most brutal day of your stay so far, being sent to your grandfather's close friend to help them move some things around. Easy enough, right? Wrong. It was only after you got there that they dared to tell you that they needed the entirety of their old shack emptied so they could tear it down to build a new one. Very exciting for them, a very mud-covered day for you. There wasn’t much you could do to salvage your clothes from the brunt of it, completely stiff from the dirt and grass and just years of grime that thrived in that neglected shed. One tumble involving a rusted bucket of mystery liquid destroyed your pants and shoes, and an accidental bump into a support beam sent a rain of rotten wood to really add to the whole experience. The couple was nice enough to send you back in some spare clothes so you wouldn’t dirty the bus with the worst of it, but you must have been a sight anyway because not a single person on the entire ride back had the decency to look subtly. The pants fit, thankfully, but they were bright pink and fuzzy, and the shirt was an old button-up that was nearly as ratty as the ruined clothes in the plastic bag by your foam sandal-covered feet.

To be honest, you were near tears, feeling pathetic.

And to make matters worse, Bus Boy, naturally, had to make an appearance and kill any happiness you hoped to find at the end of a grueling day. Sitting prettily, taking a break from the newspaper spread across his lap to watch the passing landscape, like some artist's wet dream. What were the odds that he was going to be on this stupid bus, far later than he ever did, passing all his usual stops, prolonging this horrible moment? You wanted to curl up into a ball, but there was also something healing about staring at this beautiful man that made breathing simultaneously easier and harder. 

Now that you were looking closer, you could tell something was a little…off. What it was, you weren’t completely sure, but his usual relaxed stance was a little stiff, kind of like he was getting ready to bolt the moment the door opened. Honestly, you were surprised every time the doors opened and he remained where he was, just as tense, if not more, as the minutes passed. 

Not that you were looking that closely, of course.

The one mission you had currently was to make it off the bus before he could get a good look at you. Not that you had any idea if he noticed you, before today or even right now, but the idea that maybe this could be your second first impression made you nearly jumpy as he looked. After that initial gawking session, you would only let your eyes pass briefly over his, just to make sure he wasn’t looking at you, before returning to look towards the front of the bus, willing it to go just a little faster. Of all the days to have Bus Boy ride past his usual stop, it had to be today. Your hands couldn’t sit still in your lap, one too many passes over your face has made it impossible to figure out if you just added more dirt or you were just that gross, and you had to force your leg to top bouncing because it kept nudging the bag at your feet, the crinkle of plastic booming in the nearly empty bus.

Then finally, finally, it pulled up to your stop. You were on your feet before the bus came to a complete halt, a rookie mistake as the doors always took a second longer to fully open, and, of course, Bus Boy had to be sitting right next to the exit. You bounced on the balls of your feet, the longest 4 seconds of your life. You couldn’t help it, casting one last look at the boy you had tried so hard to ignore all ride. And, to your horror, he was looking right back at you, stunning you into near rigor mortis. 

Cute? What was I thinking? This guy is gorgeous!

“I-” his soft voice started (of course he had to have a nice voice too, are you freaking kidding me-), but you didn’t look up, forcing your way through the door the second they were wide enough, calling out a thank you to the driver over your shoulder, practically sprinting down the hill to your temporary residence. You were absolutely mortified.

Megumi watched you bolt with wide eyes, a blush creeping up his cheeks. He slapped a hand over his mouth, hiding his expression from anyone who dared to look over at him. It was the only thing he could do to stop them from shaking.

It was how Yuuji and Nobara found him three stops later, his legs nearly jelly as they pushed himself off the bus and into the darkening evening. His tight grip on the wad of newspapers he brought was nearly humorous.

“Woah! What’s up with you?” Yuuji called, jogging up to meet him. He was carrying a bag bursting with snacks under his arm, bounding up to him in anticipation of the star gazing the three were going to do tonight. Nobara leisurely strolled up beside him, arms gently carrying a blanket Megumi recognized as Yuuji’s. Megumi shook his head once, twice, trying to snap himself out of the spell you had cast on him, instead taking a second look at the now obvious women’s bag his friend was carrying.

“What’s with the bag?”

“Oh! Nobara was complaining about her shoulder acting up again, so I offered to carry it for her.” Megumi side-eyed his other friend, who was skillfully dodging his gaze in favor of examining her nails. It’s more than three months now since Nobara injured her shoulder helping our Yuuji and his older brother Sukuna reinforce a collapsing wall in their house (she was excellent with a toolbox, though it was rare for her to do any of the actual dirty work), a minor injury that didn’t even have her hospitalized, but every once in a while her shoulder will mysteriously ‘act up’ and Yuuji, who was horrified that his friend was injured in any capacity helping him, immediately is at her beck and call. “Gojo and the rest say hi, by the way. We passed each other on my way out, and he wanted me to bring you this.” Megumi rolled his eyes at the condom deposited in his hand.

“What an idiot.”

“He really is. Did he seriously think you’d have the courage to ask even though you’ve been creeping on them all summer without a word?” Megumi swung out his elbow, but Nobara simply sidestepped, putting Yuuji between the two of them.

“Shut up.”

“What, was your beautiful angel even more breathtaking today that you couldn’t ask them to come?” Nobara teased. Yuuji laughed, jostling Megumi to match the goofy atmosphere. After all, it wasn’t every day that their cool and collected friend looked as vulnerable as he felt. 

Megumi hesitated, recalling immediately the adorable shyness you displayed today, something he hadn’t seen since that first night he saw you. Your face was covered in dirt, obviously exhausted, and in clothes that were definitely not yours. He easily remembered your flushed face as you made eye contact, the longest he’d had the pleasure to hold. He felt a pleasant shiver run up his spine.

“Yeah. Something like that,” he mumbled, his cheeks flaming bright pink. His companions didn’t give him a moment of peace, hounding him immediately for his more than obvious crush. Megumi rolled his eyes at them, chucking the unneeded (but not unwanted) condom in the trash as he ushered them to start their climb up the hill.

Next time, he thought, falling into step with his laughing friends. Next time, he’ll pluck up the courage to finally ask you to hang out outside your near-daily bus rides. And, while he’s at it, tell you just how beautiful you are.

______________________________________________________________

masterlist  l  Laufeyfest masterlist

[jpmarvel90]

Don't let me down - Part 5

Masterlist Scarlett Masterlist

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Relationship: MamaScarlett x 16 yr old Reader

Summary: Settling in, Y/n now meets Scarlett's wider family. Whilst the Johansson/Josts go support Y/n at her first game of the season.

Word count: 6071

Y/n's POV:

"Morning kiddo. You're up early." Colin greets me whilst balancing Cosmo on his shoulder. It's current 6:30am and I've been up a lot longer than that, but I'm not about to tell him that. "Yeah, I'm quite an early riser." I share, it's not a lie, but I'm not an early riser through choice. I'd happily sleep in late if I could. But my brain still thinks if I stay in too late, I'll be caught by Mr Woodstock.

It also doesn't help that today I'm meeting Scarlett's mom and siblings. Thankfully, they're not all bringing their kids. I think that would be a little too overwhelming for me if I'm honest. "Would you like some coffee? You look like you could do with some." He offers, making me smile. "You saying I look like crap?" I ask him with a raised eyebrow.

There's a brief look of panic on his face but when I smirk at him, I can see his shoulders relax, knowing he hasn't actually offended me. "Just a little tired around the edges." He teases in return. "Then fill her up!" I say, holding a mug out towards him. Once I take my first sip, I can already feel my body starting to wake up.

"Are you nervous about today?" He asks me, making conversation whilst he tends to Cosmo. I look down to the mug in my hand, a little ashamed that I'm so nervous about this. "A little." I admit. When I do lift my head, I'm met with Colin giving me a warm, sympathetic smile. "Don't worry. They're all really excited to see you again. I can also confirm they are lovely people. I definitely got lucky with the in-laws." He reassures me.

"Meet me again?" I ask a little confused. "Yeah, they were all there when Scarlett gave birth to you. They all met you then. Melanie is especially excited to meet you. I have a feeling she'll be over earlier than the rest to get a head start." He chuckles. "Seriously though, if it becomes too much for you at any time, just let me know and I'll make up an excuse to take you out of the room." He offers and it makes me smile.

I've only been living here for a little over two weeks, but Colin has been so accepting of me. I mean, Scarlett has too, but I'm her daughter. Colin had every right to dislike me, but he is so caring and treats me like Rose and Cosmo. I really appreciate it. I can see why Scarlett likes him.

It's slowly become easier being here. Since our talk in the park, I feel closer to Scarlett which is nice. Rose went from not giving a shit about me, to me being her favourite person. Which gave me a bit of whiplash, but it's been nice spending time with her. She hasn't long started playing soccer at school, so I've been helping her to practice her skills. I must admit, she's not bad.

After my blip of questioning my annoyance to Laura, I spoke to her about it, and she spent about half an hour scolding me for ever thinking that. Our relationship is probably stronger than ever, and I know that I'm going to take the plunge soon and tell her how I feel. I know I risk losing our friendship, but I hope that even if she isn't interested, she'll stick around.

"Do you want me to take Cosmo whilst you go and get ready?" I ask Colin, who instantly nods and moves to hand Cosmo over to me. "Thanks kiddo. I'll see you in a bit." He smiles, placing a kiss to my head and rushing up the stairs. "Hi there buddy. Look at you all handsome this morning." I greet my little brother. Is it sad that my favourite person is a baby?

Wanting to do something nice for the family, I decide to start on breakfast. I find the baby sling and make sure that Cosmo is comfy before grabbing out what I need to make some pancakes. I put some music on quietly and start to dancing around a little to help comfort Cosmo, who is giggling a treat. It keeps distracting me and I find myself getting lost in his cute little smile. God he's such a cute baby!

"Ok then buddy. What shall I prepare to go with the pancakes? Bacon is always a winner." I start to talk to him, and he looks at me as if he understands every word I'm saying. "I guess we need to do fruit for Scarlett. Don't want her complaining that her trainer will be mad." I say with a scrunched up face. Fruit just ruins pancakes. "Oh, better not forget the syrup for Rosebud!" I remember, moving to the cupboard to grab out the bottle.

"Well, this is a sight I could get used to." I spin around so quickly to see the source of the voice. Scarlett is leant against the door frame, watching over us with a content smile on her face. "Your 16 year old with a baby?" I ask with a raised eyebrow. "God no! No sex until you're like 30!" She quickly orders, making me laugh. "Wait. You're not, you know. There isn't someone I haven't met that you're uh doing that with?" She asks making this moment all too awkward. "Oh God, Scarlett no!" I respond, my cheeks heating up and going a dark red. "Sorry. I was just check. What I had meant was it's nice seeing my daughter being adorably cute with her brother. I love how well he's taken to you." She corrects her earlier statement and thankfully drops the sex talk.

"And thank you for being so considerate of my feelings on my trainer." She smirks at me, making me blush with embarrassment that she heard all that. "Coffee or juice." I ask her, moving on from that subject. "I'll do drinks. Thank you though sweetheart." She smiles at me, moving to the fridge to grab out a couple of cartons of juice.

I can feel her eyes on me whilst she's pouring the drinks. I take the last pancake out of the pan and turn around and meet her eyes. "Something you want to ask?" I question her, seeing the same nervous look she has in her eyes when she wants to talk about something, but isn't sure how to bring it up. "I notice you're always up early. But today you were up earlier than usual. Is everything ok?" She asks me.

I frown at her as I wasn't downstairs any earlier than I normally would be. I made sure of it. "I wasn't earlier. It was only 6:30." I lightly defend, but it only causes her frown to deepen. "I heard you up at at least 4:30." She calls me out and my gaze drops. "I think the question is why were you up that early Mrs Johansson?" I ask, trying to cover the fact she's right.

She sighs but takes a seat whilst I continue to bounce Cosmo who clearly isn't happy that I stopped dancing. "I'm nervous about you meeting the family." She admits, taking me by surprise at her honestly. "Why are you nervous?" I ask her, is she worried that they're not going to like me? I try not to let the panic overtake me and allow her to answer before I get too worked up.

"They're going to meet you and see how amazing you are and hate me even more for giving you up." She shares honestly, and it shocks me that she's being so open with me. "I guess they can't hate me more than I hate myself though." She sighs, her gaze focused on the baby in the sling. "You can't change the past Scarlett, only the future." I tell her firmly, which makes her look at me with teary eyes.

I've spent a lot of time talking with Laura about my feelings towards Scarlett. There is still a lot of anger and hidden feelings there. But what I said is right. We can't change what happened. I know she tried to get me back but couldn't. As soon as she had the chance to, she was there. It's still going to take some time for me to actually feel part of this family and not the random kid living with them. But I'm mature enough to focus on the here and now and to try and move on from the past. Eventually.

Feeling like I should repay her honesty, I decide to admit the truth also. "I was nervous too. But that they would hate me and think I'm just here to use you or something." I share and her eyes widen. "Oh sweetheart! They would never think that. In fact, I know they don't. Mom is so incredibly excited to meet you. I'm worried she might not let you go when she hugs you." She reassures me through a chuckle.

"Besides, if anyone says anything slightly negative about you, I will hand their ass to them before they can even finish their sentence." She says with a completely serious face. "Well, let's not have any violence on the first family get together." I joke, making her laugh. "No promises." She returns, walking over towards Cosmo and I, wrapping an arm around me and placing a kiss to my head.

I never used to be a hugger with people other than Laura. But I'm actually starting to enjoy them. They make me feel warm and like I'm actually safe. It's amazing how in two weeks my mindset is already seeing small glimmers of change. "I'm always here if you need to talk. I know you have Laura, but I'd like to be able to help if I can." She tells me softly. "Thanks. I appreciate that." I respond. "Now, let's eat." I instruct her.

Breakfast is nice. I'm still getting used to the five of us sitting down all together to eat our meals. Scarlett and Colin listen so intently to Rose, and you can see how happy that makes her. Conversation moves on to the fact that they are all planning to come and watch me at the first game of the season. I told them that they really don't have to, but they said they wouldn't miss it for the world.

It'll be weird to actually have someone there supporting me. I've never had that before. Laura's parents would always cheer for me too if they were watching, but it's not the same as having your parents there showing you how much they support you. I just hope I can focus on the game and not the fact that they'll be in the stands.

For the rest of the morning, I helped Scarlett and Colin prepare the food for dinner later. Everyone was planning to arrive at 2 so I had plenty of time to sit and stew in the negative thoughts going through my head.

At about half 1 the doorbell rings and Colin smirks at me. "Told you she'd come early." He gloats, moving to the hallway to greet our guest. Just like Colin had predicted, Scarlett's mom had come by early. As we walk into the hallway, she's just finishing hugging Rose. When her head lifts to look to Colin, her eyes land on me and they go wide.

She lets out a small gasp and walks slowly over to me. "Y/n?" She whispers and I nod. "Wow. You're beautiful." She compliments me, making me blush. Her eyes are glossed over with tears, and she stands in front of me. "I'm Melanie. I guess technically your grandmother." She smiles at me. "It's lovely to meet you." I respond as confidently as I can. She goes to hug me, but my stupid body flinches at the action and I'm internally cursing myself for allowing it to happen.

She looks at me worriedly and lowers her arms. I can see Scarlett looking on with concern, but I try not to focus on that. "I'm sorry. I should have asked. Can I hug you?" She asks with a kind smile, not a hint of annoyance at my respond. I nod and she carefully steps forward and wraps her arms around me. She's a similar height to Scarlett so I have to bend down a little as I melt into her hug. How can someone I've just met feel so comfortable. "I'm so glad you're home." She whispers to me, and I give her a little squeeze.

When she pulls apart, she holds my hands and looks at my face once again. "You look just like Scarlett at 16. Except for the brown hair!" She observes. I feel a little exposed under her gaze, but this was definitely a better reaction than I had been imagining in my head!

We move into the living room and Melanie sits with me, asking me lots of questions to get to know me more. She shares some embarrassing stories about Scarlett, much to her annoyance, but I very much enjoyed hearing those. Rose has been surprisingly good. I was worried that she would get annoyed that I was stealing her nana's attention, but she's been joining in the conversation and allowing us time together too.

We're all taken by surprise when the door opens and we hear a voice shouting from all the hallway. "The favourite twin has arrived!" My heart instantly starts to beat rapidly. I don't know why but I'm most nervous about meeting Hunter. Maybe it's because he's Scarlett's twin and I know how close they are. I can't help but worry about how he's going to react. I can feel my palms getting sweaty and I'm trying to count as many red things as I can to prevent a panic attack forming. This is stupid. It's just her brother! I can do this.

Scarlett's POV:

As soon as Hunter makes his presence known, I can see fear wash over Y/n. Things had been going so well with mom, after the little blip at the beginning, and I thought she was doing ok. But I couldn't be more wrong. I should have done more to make sure she was comfortable.

I quickly stand up and make my way over to her, when I see her eyes darting all over the place, sitting next to her and carefully placing my hand on her knee. Colin thankfully gets up to greet my idiot brother. "That boy will never learn to knock." I jokingly complain, hoping to provide some comfort without making her worries be the focal point. I've learnt that Y/n hates being centre of attention, and she wouldn't like it if I made a big deal about this right now. Even though it's breaking my heart to see her so scared. I just want to scoop her up and take her away so she can calm down.

Her eyes stop moving around the room and I wonder if she was counting objects. It's something that I know Lizzie does to help during her anxiety attacks. "What colour?" I ask her and she looks at me in shock. "Red." She admits shyly, so I return a smile easily. "Everything is going to be ok." I reassure her, wrapping my arm around her. "Remember, I'll throw hands regardless. I'm black widow remember." I joke, hoping to lighten the mood, and it seems to work. She let's out a genuine laugh, which makes both mine and mom's face light up. I'll never tire of hearing her laugh. I just wish I heard it more.

Colin and Hunter soon enter the living room and I notice that Hunter is calmer than he normally is. He can be a bit of a loose canon at times, but it's clear that Colin has had a word with him. Which I'm glad for. I love my brother, but I know if he goes to full Hunter mode then he is going to freak Y/n out more than she already is.

After greeting Rose and Cosmo, he walks towards us, and I can't help but laugh at the stern look mom is giving him. Y/n stands up and holds her hand out to Hunter, clearly getting a wave of confidence. "Hi, I'm Y/n. Nice to meet you, Hunter." She greets with a smile. I can see her outstretch hand is shaking and I notice that Hunter clocks it too.

He quickly steps forward and takes it. "I'm so happy that I finally get to meet you Y/n. As soon as Scarlett told us that you were moving in, I was desperate to meet you. But I was kept away, something about you need to settle." He greets in return, smirking with his last comment. "How are you settling in?" He asks, motioning for her to take her seat on the sofa again.

I take my own seat and watch over them with a smile as they easily seem to get on. I've noticed that Y/n has this really great wit. She can be hilarious and I'm sure she's even funnier, but she's scared to go too far. I can't wait to see her be unapologetically herself.

There isn't much respite though as Adrian and Vanessa turn up a few minutes later. Thankfully, they arrived together, meaning that Y/n didn't have to go through another two introductions. I watch as they both introduce themselves, smiles permanently planted on their faces. "I can't believe how much of a mini-me to Scarlett you are!" Vanessa observes and she wraps an arm around Y/n's shoulder. Another flinch wracks her body, and it breaks my heart that her reaction is still that someone is trying to hurt her. Vanessa's eyes snap to mine, and I mouth "later" to her, and she nods slowly, a frown on her face.

Everything is going well as my siblings and mom get to know Y/n more. They're being really respectful and not pushing too hard or bombarding her with questions. It's a shame my dad couldn't be here, but he's hoping to visit in the next week or so, which will be nice as the whole family will have had the chance to see her.

Happy that they're all getting on well, I head into the kitchen to start getting everything ready for dinner. I almost have a heart attack when I close the fridge door and Vanessa is stood there with an expectant look on her face. Mom stood just behind her. "Jesus Christ, you scared the crap out of me." I say, holding my hand to my chest. "Sorry, I did call after you, but you obviously didn't hear me." She apologises, moving into the kitchen to help me with the food.

"So, are you going to tell me why my niece is flinching?" She asks. It's not accusingly, but there is definitely a worried and angry tone to her voice. I look up and see mom waiting expectantly for a response as well. When I told them that she was back in my life, I had only briefly mentioned about her being in a difficult foster home. It didn't feel right to be sharing that so early on.

I sigh, rubbing at my head. "She uh. She didn't have the easiest of upbringings." I admit, the sadness washing over me all over again as I know I could have prevented it if I made the right decision 16 years ago. "What do you mean by that?" Vanessa asks. "Her adoptive parents were abusive. Then when they died, she was moved into an abusive foster home. So, this is the first safe space that she has lived in." I tell them, making them both gasp in shock.

"My poor baby." Mom whispers, tears filling her eyes. "Its that the lingering bruise on her face? It's barely noticeable but I clocked it." Vanessa asks, a sadness across her face. "Yeah, Mr Woodstock, the shitty foster home manager, had hit her after he blamed her for being drunk in front of me and Danny." I explain, my gaze focusing on the pork in front of me.

I'm stopped in my actions when mom's hand rests on mine. "Come here honey." She instructs me. It's only then that I realise that I'm crying. "I should never have left her mom. I let her down so badly. I don't deserve to have her in my life now." I cry into her shoulder, letting it all out. Vanessa quickly walks towards us and wraps her arms around the two of us.

"Don't talk like that Scarlett. Yes, it may have been the wrong decision, but you were doing what you thought was best at the time. You never could have known she would end up in a place like that. You trusted the system to take care of your daughter. You are giving her the life she deserves now." Mom comforts me, her hand running up and down my back.

"Mom's right. Other than looking terrified of being surrounded by us Johanssons, she seems happy. There's a relief in her eyes. It's going to take time for her to fully settle and find herself again. But you are going to be there supporting her in getting back to that person. We all are going to be here for her. For both of you." Vanessa adds on, making me smile. "Now, do you have this assholes address. I'm thinking of paying a visit." She asks with a chuckle. "Country jail right now. Where he's meant to be!" I reply, grateful that he's not going to be able to get anywhere near Y/n.

After a moment to compose myself, we start back on finishing everything for dinner. I call in Colin to help take the food through whilst the others move to the dining room, sitting at the table. Rose instantly sits next to Y/n, making me smile at how much she loves her big sister already. Hunter takes the seat the other side almost as quickly, clearly deciding that she's his new favourite.

Conversation through dinner flows easily and I can see Y/n get more comfortable as the time goes on. There's lots of laughter and storytelling, mostly embarrassing ones about me, but Y/n is loving them, so I'll happily let her know them all to see her smile.

By the time it comes to everyone leaving, I'm a little sad. But I couldn't be happier with how it went. Mom's already planning to pop around in the week to have some one on one time with her after school and Y/n seemed really happy about that. As they're leaving Adrian pulls me into a tight hug. "I'm glad she's home. Take care of her. Whoever hurt her has done a number on her." He says to me quietly. I look at him shocked and he just shrugs. "She has all the signs. It wasn't hard to work out." He answers my unasked question. "I'll protect her with everything I have." I assure him and he smiles.

Hunter approaches me next with the biggest grin on his face. "I'm so happy to have a new partner in crime. Rose is great but, you know, she's only 7. With Y/n the possibilities are endless." He smirks. "Oh, I'm going to regret introducing you two aren't I." I sigh, knowing that I'm going to be on the receiving end of his pranks now. "Love you sis!" He shouts as he heads out to the car. I flip him off which only makes him laugh harder.

With the door closed I let out a deep breath, grateful that it went so well. I go to the living room and see that Y/n isn't there. I find her in the kitchen, clearing up from dinner. "Oh, you don't have to do that sweetheart." I tell her, taking the plates from her hands. "It's ok. You cooked. I'm happy to clean." She tells me, taking the plates back from me. "Fine, but I'm helping." I insist, starting to pack up the leftovers.

"Your family is lovely." Y/n breaks the comfortable silence we had. "They're your family too and they love you. So much. In fact, I'm scared that Hunter is going to try and steal you away from me." I joke making her laugh. "Yeah, he needs to work on his prank ideas. They're a bit childish." She shares. Clearly Rose was the mastermind of all their ideas!

"Seriously though Y/n. You are apart of this family. You never have to give them a label, but they love you as their granddaughter and niece, and they always will." I reassure her and I notice her eyes gloss over. "I never had more than my parents before." She shares at a whisper. I move towards her with my arms open and she falls into them. "Well, you do now and we're not going anywhere." I tell her firmly. "I love you my sweet baby." I tell her and she squeezes me that little bit tighter. "Thank you for saving me." She says it so quietly, I barely hear it. But I do and it completely breaks me.

The tears silently fall down my cheeks as I hold my daughter. I don't ever want to let her go. I want her to be safe and loved and happy and I will do everything in my power to make sure that she gets the best in life.

__________

"Come on mom! We're going to be late!" Rose shouts to me from the hallway. I head downstairs with Cosmo in my arms. "Ok ok! I'm here, I was just getting your grumpy pants brother ready." I inform her but she huffs. "We're going to be late and miss out on the good seats if we don't leave now!" She complains with a pout. "I know honey. Colin is just getting his wallet." I tell her, making sure that we have everything.

We're about to head to Y/n's school and watch their opening game of the season. I'm so excited to see her in action. She loves soccer and I'm happy that I'm finally able to share in that passion with her. Rose is beyond excited and has even made her a sign to cheer her on with.

Colin jogs down the stairs and I smile as we're all wearing blue, their home colours. Rose is very sad that you can't buy a jersey so she can match her sister, so we found the closest top that we could instead.

The whole way there, Rose is excitedly rambling about how she hopes that Y/n scores the winning goal. Then as soon as the car is in park, she's undone her own belt and jumped out, rushing us all along. I'm surprised at how many people are here to watch the game. Seems like they're popular. I let Rose lead us to where she wants to sit and we end up at the halfway line and about midway up the bleachers. "These are great seats." Rose says proudly, wiggling with excitement. The team are out warming up and my eyes roam over them to find my daughter. "There's Y/n!" Rose calls out, pointing towards her on the pitch. She looks really focused as she runs through her drills with the team.

The coach blows the whistle and the team move towards the touchline to grab water. Y/n catches a glimpse of us and looks completely shocked as we wave at her. She says something to her coach, who nods, and she makes her way up to us. "You came?" She asks as if she can't believe it. "Of course, we did. We promised we would." I reply, ignoring the sadness that she's not had this support before.

"Sissy! I made you a sign!" Rose tells her excitedly, showing what she had made. A wide smile appears on her face. "Thanks Rosebud. I love it." She returns. "I better get back down but thank you for coming." She thanks. "Good luck kiddo! Kick some ass!" Colin encourages her, making her laugh as she jogs back down to her team. "Colin that's a bad word." Rose scolds him. I hide the laugh fighting to come out as Colin looks like a naughty schoolboy.

My eyes don't leave Y/n as I watch her with her team. My pride only grows when I notice that she puts on the captain's armband. They get together as a group and put their hands in the middle before call "Panthers." We all cheer as they take their places on the pitch. My excitement is only growing as I get to see how good she is.

Turns out she's very good. She controls the ball so easily and commands her team like someone far older than she actually is. A mistake in the back line results in the opposition scoring and all of the girls' heads drop. But Y/n gets them together, clearly giving them a pep talk. They have an extra bounce in their step after that talk and they retain all the possession and pressure for the next 20 minutes.

With a beautiful bit of skill, Y/n darts around two defenders. She looks up at the goal, probably contemplating shooting. "Shoot!" Rose is shouting from beside me. But she does the opposite just as a defender approaches her, she does a low cross finding Laura, who hammers the ball in the back of the net. It's like she had a sixth sense that she was there. Her gaze wasn't even in that direction.

We all jump up from our seats cheering whilst the team celebrate. Whilst I watch them set back up, I can see why they get such a good crowd here. The team are really talented. By half time it's 1-1 but the panthers have had all the pressure and Y/n has had a couple of close calls. It feels like it's only a matter of time until they score.

Whilst they're taking on water at halftime, Y/n looks up towards us and Rose jumps up and down waving. Y/n's smile grows as she notices and waves back. "She saw me!" Rose points out triumphantly.

The second half starts with an exhausting pace. The passing technique of the girls is amazing, but their opposition has picked up their game. It's end to end and my nerves are building as the opposition striker shoots and the ball just scraps past the post for a goal kick.

Y/n calls out to the team to calm down, making the gesture with her arms at the same time. I feel like I'm seeing Y/n in her element. She is so confident and sure of herself. I hope that in time, we'll get to see this away from the soccer pitch.

The panthers get a corner and Y/n is tussling with a defender in the box. Just as the ball is about to be hit, she does a dummy move, tricking the defender and giving herself space in front of her. She jumps in the air and her head connects with the ball. It feels like it's going in slow motion as we watch the ball move through the goalkeeper's hands and into the net. "YES!" I jump up cheering, Rose following my lead. She lifts her sign in the air cheering loudly. Colin has Cosmo bouncing on his hip and it seems, watching his sister play soccer has gotten him out of his grumpy mood.

The intensity of the game doesn't drop though. If anything, the opposition pick up even more with conceding that goal. Y/n is spending a lot more time in a defensive position, showing her ability once again. She really is talented. I know I'm biased, but I truly believe it.

It looks inevitable that the opposition are going but score but Laura makes a break, but their defence manages to get back pretty quickly. She looks up and sees Y/n stood just outside the box. With a cheeky back pass, she gets the ball to Y/n and moves out the way as Y/n takes the shot as soon as the ball as at her feet. She hits it sweetly and it curls into the top right hand corner. Once again, we're jumping around in the stands.

By the looks on the team's face, none of them can believe the shot, Y/n looking more shocked than anyone. Laura runs at her, jumping in her arms. Y/n holds her easily, spinning around. I don't know if they realise it, but they are definitely having a moment. Y/n is looking at her like she's hung the moon and stars.

The rest of the team are soon joining in the celebrations, their moment over. But as they go to retake their position for the restart, Laura loops her arm around Y/n's shoulder and gives her a kiss on her cheek before running off. I chuckle to myself when I can see Y/n's cheek instantly blush. Oh, she's definitely smitten!

After a nervous last 5 minutes, the final whistle blows, and we join with the rest of the crowd to applaud the team. We wait for a few minutes as the teams shake hands and Y/n thanks the referee. Rose all the while getting more impatient. Before I know it, she's run off and is making a beeline towards Y/n.

Though my worries instantly dissipate as Y/n bends down and scoops her sister up and rests her on her hip as she listens to her little sister ramble excitedly. I slip my hand in Colin's and we walk down towards the touchline so we can congratulate her too. I watch as Y/n proudly introduces Rose to her teammates before her and Laura walk in our direction.

Laura is looking a little nervous as she approaches us. "Hi Scarlett, Colin. Little Cosmo." Y/n greets us, placing Rose on the floor and pinching at Cosmo's cheek. "I'd like you to meet my best friend, Laura." She introduces her friend. "Sorry about how I spoke to you both last time." She apologises but I instantly wave her off. "No, you were protecting Y/n. I appreciate that she's got you in her life." I reassure her and notice her shoulders instantly relax.

"You played an amazing game. Congratulations the both of you for scoring." I congratulate them. "I'm not exaggerating when I say that was one of the best games of soccer I've watched." Colin adds on, making Y/n beam. "Can you believe the goal she scored at the end. She's going to be a superstar." Laura compliments Y/n, nudging her shoulder. "Oh, shut up. It was just a fluke." She tries to play it off. "Besides, it's because I had the best partner up front." She returns, making Laura's cheeks blush too.

"Are your parents here Laura? I'd love to meet them." I ask, excited to get to know the people in Y/n's life. "No, they're both working tonight." She responds a little disappointed. "Yeah, but it's the first game they've missed in ages." Y/n comforts Laura, slipping her arm around her waist. "Yeah, you're right. It's nice to see you final have someone cheering for you. And all in matching colours too." Laura laughs. "This one wasn't happy that she couldn't buy your jersey." I share, making Rose pout. "I'll see what I can do." Y/n smiles at Rose, running her hands through her hair.

"If you're parents are out tonight. Why don't you join us for dinner." I offer, smirking internally when I see Y/n's eyes light up. "Oh, you don't need to do that. I don't want to be a bother." Laura deflects. "You will never be a bother, Laura. You're always welcome at our house." I reassure her. She looks to Y/n who's nodding like a happy puppy. "Ok, that would be lovely. Thank your Mrs Johansson." She returns. "Oh please, call me Scarlett. I'm not old yet." I joke, making the others laugh.

We wait for Y/n and Laura to change and start on the drive home. I'm excited to get to know Laura a bit more. I also want to see if my instinct is right and see if these two are as smitten with each other as they look. I hope so, because she makes Y/n incredibly happy!

Part 6

[darylthekidd]

i don't care much for dogs

pairing: aizawa shouta x puppy girl!reader

summary: shou never thought that he'd be up for adopting a dog. they were clingy, hyper, dumb, and gross. or so he thought.

warnings:

this had to be a joke, right? the one time eraserhead steps away from his patrol for the night, he's gotta be the hero again. well, according to himself anyway.

you were just chilling, huddled into your dingy, makeshift bed that you had long outgrown. here in the Tourism Sector of the city. you must've been dodged by a previous caretaker.

not that shouta was looking, but he noticed how you looked. your adorable ears, hidden poorly in your sparkly, dewy fro. you had on simple tops and bottoms but he wondered if that shake was real. your small, chubby self just perched so cutely, he didn't like dogs but he would tolerate them for you.

as he took a step to try and wake you, he heard a meek growl sound from you. had you been awake this whole time? you must be a light sleeper.

"m'not drunk 'n' m'not going back to the hold. not with you." the girl mumbled, shouta just bent down a little to see her a bit more. he was treated to the smell of dog mixed with a fading perfume. it was a strange smell.

"hey. i'm eraserhead. can you tell me if you're alright?"

you peaked up at him, your nose all ashy and twitchy. dehydration. "if you come any closer, i'll rip your heart out through your chest. stay back. what do you want?"

the whiplash?!?

shouta just fought the urge to be irritated by some random pup being rude. this dog probably had ran away rather than be dumped if the way she watched him was any sign.

"are you alright?"

"yea, m'fine. do i need'ta move?"

the way your cheeks seemed to fluff out as you glared at him sent flutters into his throat. you were kinda cute. if he had any say in it, he would've offered to become a very temporary caretaker for you. he still wasn't too much of a fan of dogs.

shouta shook his head, "nah, as long as you're okay. i'm a hero and i want to help."

she lowered her body back down, still keeping her eyes trained on shouta's silhouette through the dark.

"i'm trying to stay on the low. i'm running from a big hero corporation. thanks but no thanks."

he was right. "okay. i'm gonna go then. make sure you stay safe out here."

he wasn't sure why he said that, but as he left the cute, little, floppy-eared hybrid as per her request, he felt differently than he had maybe a few minutes ago.

if he's being honest, he would've forgotten all about that random late night interaction. in fact he did. that was until he saw her again during his mission. she was out, but he suspected that the bloody tears in her skin were from tranquilizers. if she was any bit as fierce as she was when he first saw her, she probably gave the kidnappers hell right back, if not worse.

"okay, you watch her while i go get the boss. careful, she bites. fat bitch."

"she is chubby and she is a female dog. that's literally what you're saying. or do you mean it as an insult?"

the goon just smacked his lips, aggressively sighing while throwing his arms up. "dude. stop bringing your weird ass simp feminism bullshit up. literally nobody cares, it was just a joke, bro."

shouta wanted to punch his lights out, but he was undercover as a neutral party investor. he couldn't let them see him fight. so he just nodded and let the subject fall for the moment.

"sure.. i don't care."

"if she wakes up or even looks like she's getting ready to move-" the goon pointed to the tranquilizer darts and gun sat on a window sill behind shouta's head, "-shoot her with that. it's the only way we can safely show her to folks. she usually just tries to scratch off people's faces. we wouldn't want your face ruined since you're such a good investor, mr. mooney."

as soon as the greasy asshole left, shouta stretched and got relaxed on the only clean couch. if it took as long to find and get the ringleader to see him as it usually did, shou was going to just catch some sleep.

"eraserhead? you're here, too?"

shouta's eyes shot to see the short, dog hybrid sitting up. he hadn’t notice before but while her eyes were wrapped, her cute, little, floppy ears still poked through her now unkempt hair.

"yea. i'm undercover. i need you to not expose me, please."

"ow! what the fuck?"

before he could ask her anything, in the way she cradled in to herself, shouta could just barely see a blackened burn. a branding, probably. not a great sign, but not as bad as it could be.

"they fucking burned me." tears streamed down her face, "and i fucking hurt everywhere. oww..."

ok, so the situation is worsening. "i promise my colleagues and i will help you out, but i need you to be quiet."

"...do you need to put me out again? if they find out i'm up, they won't be so easy with you. i can take it, but i don't know what you do as a hero so i'm not so sure how much you can take."

"no need to worry. just trust me. okay?"

[clustermuck]

ugh...I'm still very upset about how part 2 handled Colin & Pen's characters post-LW reveal, ESPECIALLY if they weren't going to give us a lot of Happy!Polin married bliss after their reconciliation in ep 8. If you're gonna have a boat-load of angst in a story like this, you need to have a balance of resolution and happiness, otherwise there's, like, narrative whiplash (which is basically how I felt about the epilogue...)

HOWEVER — as right as I think I am that they could have made better narrative choices with writing and editing this season, I'm also starting to be like,

"are angst-driven stories just not for me?"

I mean, don't get me wrong. I'm down bad for the enemies-to-lovers/bickering couple trope and I always appreciate a quality slow-burn, so I'm hardly against angst in any form. That is, until that angst is prolonged longer than the plot or the characters organically would or should suffer with it.

So, maybe this is me just not understanding what it means to watch a Shondaland show?...I've never been a Grey's or Scandal person and I dropped out of HTGAWM pretty quickly. So maybe Shonda's approach to romance isn't for me and I need to recognize that in the show to enjoy it (or try to)? Perhaps I'm asking the show to be something it's not...it's like going into a Subway and asking for an ice cream cone—I don't know.

I guess my hill I die on when it comes to stories of any kind that feature romance is: don't confuse angst with conflict. They aren't necessarily the same thing. There is so much Polin angst in those last two episodes that could have resolved without resolving the conflict of the Queen/Cressida vs. LW (or even between Penelope and Colin! There could have still been tons of conflict there, it just should have manifested in them being on the same side of the conflict...more Polin vs. The Problem rather than Pen vs. Colin and The Problem.) I guess I mean having Colin be stonewalled against Penelope for so long (narratively speaking, I get that it was only 2 episodes) didn't feel honest to me. I understand where all of his feelings of anger, betrayal, and doubts were coming from and he's totally entitled to them! I'm not trying to take that very real, honest response away from him. But by the time it was, like, mid-episode 8 and Colin was still acting almost cruel towards Penelope, it started to feel like angst for angst sake, not for the betterment of the story. And whether or not angst-ridden stories are your "type" of show or not, you can tell poor choices from good ones and I do believe that even for fans of Shondaland's approach to storytelling, there was much to be desired. We all deserved a bit better than what we got.

[zivazivc]

Yesterday I watched Help! I'm A Fish and I had a good time! Chuck's seriousness and Fly's upbeat attitude made me think of Eddy M and Ravin respectively.

That movie is SO bizarre. I showed it to a friend a couple of weeks ago, so I watched it twice now, and we both kept screaming at all the emotional whiplash scenes jfksjhfdjh

I think I see what you mean about Eddy M and Ravin being like Chuck and Fly. Especially in the context of your headcanon where they had a rough childhood. They're not much like those characters in my version though.

Eddy M is a rude moody teen who is very matter-of-fact and headstrong - he's a 13-year-old who thinks he knows everything, and he will let you know that with sassy remarks and comebacks.

Ravin is definitely upbeat and more positive but I wouldn't call her Eddy's opposite because she is equally a smartass. She is just very jokey, self-aware nerd face emoji about it. She'll go "errrrmm, ACTually ☝" whenever she thinks she's right about something or when she just wants to annoy you. That's a good descriptor actually; instead of being rude the normal teenage way like Eddy, she is annoying - intentionally. It's a bit and she fully commits.

Dunno how to better describe them lol

Since I know you'll appreciate, I'm sharing a small chunk of my "Floyd runs into the techno troll and their kids" wip under the cut. It's been sitting and collecting dust for a while now because I have no idea how to finish it, but you can get a bit of an idea of what I imagine these two kids being like:

(for context, Floyd is helping Bruce at the bar and guess who happens to visit? And Floyd goes to take an order from them because he is a dumbass and needs too long to realize who he's talking to... The techno troll and Floyd have a private talk, it goes poorly and the techno troll lets him know that he doesn't want him to meet the kids or let them know who he is, and then Floyd hides behind the bar going full blown emo mode... (Also this is an unfinished draft so there might be some klunky parts, idk, I don't feel like editing it rn but I'm also very self conscious about my writing in general so I need to point this out 😬))

. . .

Floyd felt an intense misery wash over him. He really was a fuck up.

He stared at his feet for who knows how long (Maybe he had begun to dissociate?) when the faint sound of light feet stopping nearby made him look up.

Couldn’t this family gathering end already???

He nearly choked on his saliva while standing up in a desperate attempt to find something to busy himself with and not deal with this.

“Uh, h-hi, random kids I don’t know.”

He gave up at the sight of the empty sink with nothing to wash, and carefully looked at the two kids like they were going to bite him from any sudden movements. He probably shouldn’t stare too hard but that was what he ended up doing while taking in their appearance.

“How dumb do you think we are?” the boy—Edwin said with the distinct attitude and mannerism of a brash teen.

“From one to ten,” Ravin added quickly after and much more cheerily, while she pulled a small journal from her hair. She clicked her gel pen and pressed it against the paper in preparation. “Be honest.”

Floyd was a bit dumbfounded to be honest. “... What?” He straightened a little where he was still leaning against the sink and not facing them fully.

“Is on the slower side…” Ravin said out loud while scribbling the words down.

“We have to do this fast,” Edwin explained impatiently and with uncanny matter-of-fact-ness. “Dads think we went to the bathroom.”

“Uh… Do what fast?”

Ravin spoke up while staring at her journal: “How would you describe yourself?”

“What’s your favorite song?” asked Edwin.

"Would you say your hair is white and pink or white and red? And since when is it white? Dad never mentioned that."

“Do you think the words ‘drug addict hobo’ accurately describe you?”

“What’s better, hardcore or emo?”

“I told you it’s not emo!”

"Do you have any health history we should be aware of?" 

“If you were a bug, what type of bug would you be?

"Do we have any other siblings?" 

Floyd’s eyes grew wide from the onslaught of questions. “Whoa, whoa, slow down!” Then reluctantly he added “One at a time, please.” without even realizing he invited them into a conversation.

Edwin looked at his sister. “What was the first one?”

“How would you describe yourself? Three words.”

Floyd didn’t like the first question.

He should probably try thinking of positives…

“Uh…”

“Uhm…”

Panic.

“I’m a good singer. Well, I used to be…”

“That’s your personality?" Edwin deadpanned. "Singing?”

“I’ll just write down: bad self-image, bad under pressure, bad at understanding questions.”

"Those aren't personality traits either, sis."

"Fine! Unconfident, anti-equanimous, intelligently-impaired. There."

"Next question?"

“What’s your favorite song?”

Floyd's mouth was hanging open. He was pretty sure he just got called an insecure some-big-word idiot.

"Hello? We have a time limit. What's your favorite song?" 

“...T-That’s a hard question," he fumbled for words, "there’s so many songs, it would be impossible to choose.”

Ravin looked into her notepad with a sigh and jotted down: “Indecisive. Gives flakey vibes.”

Floyd didn’t know how to respond to that either. Would it be weird if he got upset? Because he was definitely offended. But then again maybe he deserved this. Like some kind of delayed karma.

“If you were a bug, what type of bug would you be?”

Floyd thought about it, trying to come up with some type of direct answer at least for this question. “Hmm… A grig, maybe?”

Edwin made a face. “What the heck is a grig?”

Ravin seemed to have an idea. She wrote down: “An old soul. Depressed.”

“That’s the opposite of a grig!”

“Have you heard of reverse self-awareness?”

“No…?”

“Probably ‘cause I just made it up. But the term kinda suits you." She scratched her scalp with the dull end of her pen."I think?”

Floyd, still feeling absolutely lost in the whole situation, continued to stare mutely.

Edwin was watching him judgingly. "You think there's any awareness there at all?"

Ravin gave a vague hum before getting back on track. "What do you do for a living?" 

"Rae, don't waste our time with stupid questions. It's obvious what he does."

Maybe, Floyd thought, he could finally impress them with something. "I'm a musician, actually."

"Yeah okay, music boy." Edwin replied without missing a beat. "Is the apron a new fashion accessory I don't know about?" 

Floyd’s mouth hung open (if it ever even stopped hanging). These kids were savage…

[hoovesandfloorpaws]

an ode to RBB and SBB 🧸🏳️‍🌈🧸

inspired by this beautiful post by @holyshit 🌈

i just rolled around in bed again yelling to myself out loud, because THIS ALL HAPPENED!!

So I want to talk about Rainbow Bondage Bear and Sugar Baby Bear (RBB and SBB) for a little bit. (link leads to a post of all pictures of them that had been posted to their twitter account @Rbbsbbofficial, before it was deactivated)

A timeline for RBB and SBB going up to Dec 12th, 2015 can be found here: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 (i might add links here, because I'm sure a timeline post with screenshots exists here on Tumblr, too)

The second picture?? I had forgotten there weren’t just blue and green stickers with the daily emojis :) or :( on it, but also always TWO GIANT BLUE AND GREEN LIGHT BEAMS POINTED DIRECTLY AT THEM. like, you see how dark it is pre-show start. and those blue and green beams shine down there on those queens in the fur like the second coming of gay jesus - that was so iconic!

and then THIS happened???

and then the official RBB and SBB Twitter account tweeted this??

and then the number remained active for years!

PR-Louis: "Honestly, i'll tell u nao, hOnEsTlY! god's honest TrUth [...] no, honestly! i don't fink i've ever seen it in the.. in the flesh?" LMFAO Louis, love, if you say honestly 3 more times you might summon HIM:

but for real real -- i will never get over RBB and SBB and everything connected to it and this post is absolute emotional whiplash in the BEST way.

Harry and Louis (and everyone who helped them with it), y’all are legends for that. They knew we support them and they did ALL THAT and went those extra miles all the time to communicate back to us - to people who see them; understand the signs they send; who love them for who they are and support them through it all, in whichever small or bigger ways we can.

and I want to highlight, that sourcing all these different small props while almost constantly being on tour in different cities, countries, and continents took time and dedication. knowing tour life myself, the people who usually have the most (but still not much!) free time, are in fact the artists, not the crew. I want to make a point of this, because I saw some people back then saying Harry and Louis "wouldn't have time to do all this". They did.

In the entire context of Harry&Louis' relationship and within the inner workings of who and what One Direction was back then and still is - the queer legacy of RBB and SBB needs to be remembered.

The bears were so obviously something only between Harry&Louis and us. It was always clear who the bears wanted to communicate to. If you watch interviews of them being asked about them, you quickly realise -to this day-, they don't want to discuss them in this way.

Always ask yourself really why.

Always look for the things that are not being said; not being done.

Ask why the bears were clearly visible and there at so many shows and ALL of 1D completely ignored them, when they were so busy reading fan signs and picking up on writings on arms or flags in the crowd, making lighthearted jokes about it all, or Harry reading the "LARRY" on the arm of a fan and signalling his own arm to them like 'this, here!' and then giving multiple thumb ups? Harry and Louis (who were still very active on Twitter in 2014 and 2015) didn't Retweet or Like a single one of the bears' tweets, even though RBB and SBB were clearly linked to their shows, their locations, personal friends, live band members.

Most importantly, on Twitter and at shows, RBB and SBB were always referencing things that demonstrably exclusively tied to Harry&Louis' interests and personal lives. Sometimes even before it was made public.

RBB and SBB were an enigma that conveyed a powerful message. And they were one of the most fun and sweetest ways for Harry&Louis to communicate with us. I'm really grateful for their existence.

It should remain their personal choice to address them. I personally don't ever need to hear Harry and Louis publicly explain them to the world.

The people who know, know.

We know. 🧸🏳️‍🌈🧸

[daniclaytcn]

I do agree that the pacing of what is going on is a bit suspect in regard to Eddie spiraling, the whiplash in tone is a bit jarring from a writing/viewer perspective. But that can be the nature of triggers. You can be in a very good place in life when the sneak up on you. They come out of the blue and they can set you back depending how developed your coping mechanisms are--or, if you even recognize them. A double of his dead wife--should be very obvious...lol. And Eddie should have made an emergency appointment with Frank, (to be honest Eddie should see a trauma specialist and do some freaking EDMR therapy, because it seems like Frank is just the department shrink, but I digress).

But seeing Kim has obviously been a major trigger and I'm okay that it's so out of left field because that's pretty realistic. I'm more curious to see how it unfolds and if we see Eddie's acting out more hyper arousal symptoms (being super impulsive in this case) or if he just goes into full fledge denial mode of what he's doing.

I am cautiously optimistic because this show likes to pull random rabbits out of hats!

oh no, don't misunderstand me; i absolutely get how triggers like this can come out of the blue and blow up your entire life. my real issue is that if we're in fact headed for a major breakdown with eddie, this should have been something that was hinted at all season to the viewers. i'm not even talking about major moments of foreshadowing, it could have been the little things—eddie constantly bringing up shannon in a way that starts to sound mildly obsessive; him talking about marisol (or even to her!) and accidentally saying shannon's name; his reaction to chris' issues with shannon in the premier not being as measured as it was. idk. just SOMETHING, y'know? particularly if this is gonna kick off some major mental health issues with eddie and it's gonna get dragged out. it's not the kind of thing that should be squeezed into the last 3 episodes of the season. something this big shouldn't feel so jarring idk.

[haileydilmore]

i cant believe we havent talked abt lautity at all....they're like my thing...... i offer you my insane obscure post burnerphone dynamic for them ↓

i have thoughts abt steph being like. can i ever be satisfied with this normal extremely vanilla life. grace is sweet, and steph likes her, but also the total whiplash from her last long term relationship being this fucked awful thing makes it hard to. relax. girl who has forgotten how to be normal. and grace obviously doesnt know what healthy dating is like so there's the constant overarching what if i'm accidentally overstepping + being super fucked up to this girl who has 0 basis to recognize a toxic relationship. again w the ruined for other people, doesn't even know what functional looks like, doesn't know if she'll ever be capable of it again. thanks, lex!

also worried abt eventually having to explain the scars and the rehab and the lex situation in general. it's like. grace is clearly too nervous to do it early on, but one day she Will ask. and once she knows she'll obviously think it's all gross and scary and leave. steph is sort of trying to ride it out. the 'do nothing and hope it never comes up' approach. but she's worried abt it + feels like the end of their relationship is inevitable because of this secret she's keeping + generally just feels really gross about it all. chat does she know (grace is having a completely separate solo crisis over sadistic thoughts she doesn't understand) (girl who has not so much as imagined the concept of bdsm) (0 idea why she's suddenly attracted to scars) (they are extremely compatible but deeply unaware of it/convinced the other is going to think they're a freak)

^ both of them lol. ok. sorry. ive written So Much about this it's actually embarassing. apologies if its wildly ooc. im just a little silly abt them hopefully you can see the vision. totally understandable if not. sighhh

can i be so honest with you i wasn't. Super big on lautity before this. i mean i LOVED them in theory & definitely do think grace has feelings for steph in every possible universe, especially in ac dear god, however. i never really thought grace would be able to let go of her puritan ideals & actually let herself love steph. but fuckkkk holy fuck. Okay

the whole. both of them thinking "oh god she can Never find out i'm a freak or else she'll leave me" is soo delicious. also SADIST grace i'm SORRY yes please. hello. fucking dies???????

lex having "ruined" steph & then this sadistic churchgirl with pigtails & clips in her hair comes along like ohkay this is an entirely new LEVEL of fucked up. jesus

i think steph just needs a little bit of order. not peace. just structure, and honesty. and god can grace help her with that.

[fallingforel]

Hi love, can I make a request for Sam where it’s the first time you’ve slept together and it’s the morning after and you wake up in his arms and it’s all really sweet and soft with lots of kisses and caresses and you’re enjoying that moment together? Thank you so much 🫶🏼

a/n of course I can love, here it is, I hope this was something you were looking for... if its not sorry. I just had major whiplash from writing the most angstiest piece i've ever written to now a fluffy piece, funny really but anyway. enough of my rambling on with the showww

PROMPT: none

WORDS: 1,488

⋆｡°✩

⋆｡°✩

Sam and I had been going out for a fair few months now, taking things slow after I had been through the wringer too many times with previous relationships and sam understood that. It wasn't until the fifth date he took me on that we even kissed.

"Y/n It's lovely to see you again." sam said greeting me at the door with a bunch of flowers. peonys my favourite. he took note of that on the first one we ever went on.

"Oh my gosh that has to be the biggest sweetest smelling bunch I've ever been given, even when I left my job that was a big smelling bunch, I've ever been given like."

"yeah well, biggest sweetest smelling bunch for the biggest sweetest girl like"

"your too kind sam. I'll just put these in water and then we can go"

"Okay. I'll wait out here. Don't want to make your housemates question us."

"No need come in, there all out anyway Take a seat on the sofa."

"Thanks y/n." he says stepping inside, perching on the sofa.

"no worries" I say grabbing a vase and popping the flowers in them and a bit of water. before picking up my clutch from the kitchenside where I left it.

"lets go then shall we, don't want to make us late like"

"aye. ceemon then" he says wrapping his arm around my shoulder walking with me to the door.

⋆｡°✩

walking with me to the door. "thank you sam for a great night. I think it was one of the best nights I've ever had, just like the past four other ones we've been on this month"

"aye, nee bother sweetheart I'm not that interesting. surprising we've gotten this far to be honest"

"don't be silly, you are so cool and interesting. I look forward to hear all about what you've been recording and whether you've been to the pub. that story about you helping dean with his broken leg. You are by far, Sam one of the best boys I have ever gone out with" I say leaning in to kiss him. He pulls away from me

"shit, I over thought this. sorry. I should've asked. Sor-" he cuts over my rambling by pressing his lips to mine once more deepening the kiss this time his tongue lacing over my teeth asking for entry which enters. My back hits my front door I wrap my hands round his neck my clutch bag dangling off my wrist his hands on my waist. I pull away after a few moments.

"That- wow! that was one of the best kisses I've ever had. Thank you again Sam"

"No worries darling. See you sometime soon"

"yeah. I'll message you this week letting you know when I'm working" I say hand on the handle of my front door, only opening it when he turns the corner. I step inside and screech. "Y/n? Are you okay" Gianna my housemate asks "yeah I'm okay." I say covering my mouth with my hand, doing a quieter screech this time muffled by my hand.

⋆｡°✩

We had a few more dates after that, each being a little bit better than the one before. Last night however was one of the best nights I've had with sam, with anyone in a long time. It was the one where I had invited him over to stay. Introducing him to my housemates, unintentionally

⋆｡°✩

"sam! you're early." I say stepping out of my house for a second, thank god it was me that answered the front door. and not gianna or alexia, they'd have a heart attack if they found out this way.

"I just couldn't wait to see you, I've been going mad this past fortnight not seeing you, darling" Sam says pulling me in which I soon reciprocate. Lips meeting. everytime we kissed it felt like we were on fire.

"I can't stay out here too long, Al and Gi will start to get suspicious." I say pulling away

"actually, did you want to meet them?"

I wanted to introduce the three of them to eachother soon, but not this soon. Oh well you know what they say. No time like the present.

"I thought you wanted to wait a bit more. at least until we were official like." Sam says, hands still resting on my hips

"Yeah, but you're hear now. so may aswell."

"okay sweetheart. whatever you feel like."

"Okay wait out here. let me speak to them first" I say shutting the door slowly and carefully.

"Gianna, Alexia. I have someone I want you to meet." I say walking into the living room,

"Y/n your scaring us. Who is it? It's not a boyfriend is it? I saw the peonys 2 months ago For goodness sake you know how the last one went" Gianna was the mother of the friendship group always caring out for me and alexia, she had taken on that role for me as soon as both of my parents stopped caring about me.

"I do not want a repeat of Henry, god he broke your heart one too many times" Alexia broke out. It only made me more anxious for how they would act towards Sam I didn't want them to hate sam making him anxious to come over. Alexia was the overbearing one always. When she was cold towards you she was cold towards you. You knew that she had that level of despise towards you.

I sigh. "It is a boyfriend. But both of you have to know that I've been seeing him for two months now. I wanted to make sure things were okay with us before I introduced you to him. I'll just go grab him"

"hes outside?" Alexia asks shock lacing her voice.

"yeah, he surprised us" I say shrugging with a smile on my face. Going to the front door grabbing sams wrist yanking him inside, lightly.

"Gi, al. Meet Sam."

"nice to meet yous." Sam says from beside me.

"nice to meet you too" Gi says.

"Nice to meet you too" Alexia says

"well... this is awkward" I say

"divvent have to be like. Ceemon. Lets play a drinking game."

"okay sam, whats your last name so I can call you by it?" Alexia asks

"Fender" he replies

"right Fender let me go get the vodka like"

⋆｡°✩

cut to 4 hours later and the girls were leaving the house off to a club. where they were meeting there boyfriends.

"I'm warning ye fender, one chance."

"aye, and that one chance'll last no breaking this lasses heart for as long as I've got her like"

"okay" she replies shutting the front door.

"finally" I say replying slamming my mouth onto sams kissing him where our other kisses were slow and there was no need involved. this one was fast and filled with want and need, more like to jump each other's bones.

we both moan into the kiss stripping each other of our clothes and walking our way up to the bedroom sams backs of his knees reach my bed I push him down onto it breaking the kiss, for a second but that was the only second he needed before he was asking me "are you sure y/n? are you sure you want to do this"

"Aye sam. are yee daft, I want this more than anything. now shut up and let me on with it like"

"okay" and that was it before I was slamming my lips back into his and the night got swept away from us. spending a lot of time in eachother and in the sheets together.

⋆｡°✩

I woke up to my back being tickled. I turned around to face Sam and I was completely in love. "Mornin' darlin'" He whispered "Mornin'" I said letting out a stretch and sigh at the same time "I've been doing some thinking" he says in a hush tone "Oh yeah? and whats that?" "I was wondering if you'll be me girlfriend like?" "Sam, I'd absolutely love to be your girlfriend" "Good now comin for a cuddle and a smooch?" "Yeah go on then" I scooch over and rest my head on his chest and he wraps his arms around my naked body pulling the covers up over both of our bodys and starts tickling my back again.

I lean in for a kiss and he kisses me back. Slow and sensual this time, no sense of urgency whatsoever our lips move intact with each other. It was only after a few moments I lay my head back down on his chest.

"Tired babe?" "yeah just a bit. I'm gonna take a nap right here if that's okay?" "course it is darling" he says running his hand through my hair this time having moved from my back and into my hair. And that was how we spent the rest of the morning.

[sc-intothedarknightofthesoul]

Gonna go ahead and tag you guys real quick since y'all asked for the same character, but I'd feel bad answering to only one of you: @soulofamy @mommahoodie @ank3kur0

Also, I got a bingo! Yay!

I'll be honest, what if I told you I didn't like Grøh at first?

Shocking, considering I gush over this guy time and time again, but let me explain.

I'll admit I played the Main Chronicle first before Libra of Soul and one of the first things he does is come out of nowhere to ambush Kilik, and putting myself in Kilik's shoes, I'm just as confused as to what the fuck just happened and why he straight up attacked him.

But the thing I learned about Grøh from that scene and the one where he meets the Conduit in Libra of Soul is that he doesn't exactly give off the best of first impressions: he's stand-offish, cold, and blunt (some will call him pessimistic, like I did at one point, others will say he's telling the cold hard truth no one at the time wanted to hear), didn't stop to think about the feelings of others and would rather push them away.

So what made me go a complete 180° on my mind about Grøh?

One simple answer is that, unlike Taki in that story, Grøh does come back to help Kilik and Xianghua get to Nightmare hiding out in Ostrheinsburg Castle, which ultimately made me curious about him that his Soul Chronicle became the first one I watched after completing the Main Chronicle.

The complicated answer is that I actually sort of relate to Grøh in the sense of, "I act aloof and cold at times without meaning to, I've made people cry because I get blunt as a sledgehammer when I thought it was me being honest with them, and I tend to push people away in favour of protecting myself and others from harm."

Point is, it took time, patience, and a bit of looking in the mirror to get me completely on board with Grøh's character.

Then I watched his Soul Chronicle and we got hints as to why he acts the way he does, something I have sort of expected all along: The Malfested took his friends, family and home from him, Nightmare took away his squad and a part of his humanity away and made it ten times harder to be himself without the fear of his Malfested side taking control over him, Azwel basically gave Grøh the worst kind of emotional whiplash imaginable by saving his life and then forcing him to fight and kill his best friend Curtis when he revealed his secret to him, meanwhile also having Orzal, his teacher and probably the closest thing to a father figure in the Aval Organization, killed during Azwel's defection.

Then I finally get to Libra of Soul and I see him slowly open up to the Conduit and soften his heart for them and it's just...

...If Project Soul's definition of slow burn is not only having him and another character bond over time, but also having you, as the player, bond with him over time, then that deserves a chef's kiss from me!

Also, Grøh ends up standing between the Conduit and danger coming for them TWICE, if not THRICE. First being Valtro when we see his Malfested self for the first time, second being an attempt to protect them while they were sick but he messed up his footing in his attack before Taki came out of nowhere to finish the Berserker off, and then finally standing between them and Azwel in that cutscene in the Shrine of Eurydice before reckless succumbing to his Malfestation and throwing Azwel and himself off a goddamn cliff.

Like guys, one time is an instance, two times is a coincidence, and three or more times ends up becoming a pattern.

Also to add to what I said in the previous post about the final fight with Azwel being cathartic because you're making him pay for what he's done, I also fought Azwel in the name of Grøh knowing how much he suffered because of that fucker and that I felt was fulfilling a promise.

So it's no surprise that at the end of the Soul Calibur/Good Route, I cried when Grøh looked back to the camera, to the Conduit, and gave a smile, something that is a first in this game mode. It felt to me that not only is he thanking the Conduit for basically saving his life and bringing back his humanity, it's like a very emotional thank you to the player for playing Libra of Soul.

I also finished the Soul Edge/Evil Route a while back and yeah, it felt gut-wrenching having to fight him with Soul Edge, and just like that, a piece of me died when Grøh died.

So yeah, I can fully say without a shadow of a doubt that I fell in love with this character in a fashion I didn't expect to.

Regarding his design, I'm not too deep into the lore of King Arthur and the Knights of Avalon, but I do enjoy people's take on the lore (Quest for Camelot was one of my favourite movies growing up). Plus, I am also a sucker for Norse mythology and I liked how he kinda looked like Odin with the eye patch and the fur on his coat and the fact that he's from Norway. And the way they basically combined the two is very interesting to me. I also fuck with the punk aesthetic he's got going on.

One headcanon that I see a lot of people use and one I agree with a lot is that since we don't know how old he is or when his home got attacked or how long he's been part of the Aval Organization, I figured he probably was rescued and raised by the Aval Organization when he was really young, which would sort of explain why the Oath he took about taking on the Malfested, or Outsiders, is deeply ingrained into his mindset and why he follows his orders to the letter.

It also saddens me that he doesn't get a lot of love in the fandom or isn't as remembered as much as the other characters, to the point where there was a time a friend thought he was an OC of mine, granted she didn't know he wasn't cos she doesn't participate in the Soul Calibur fandom, but still.

But yeah, just gonna wrap up these asks and say that I love Grøh a lot as a character and I think is an underrated gem.

And maybe an analogy that Grøh is like a shy, distrustful yet lovable guard dog that I adopted at a shelter, while (to add to the previous post) Azwel's the chaotic cat causing mayhem in everybody's wake that I found in a dumpster in an alleyway one Monday morning.

[ash-and-books]

Rating: 3/5

Book Blurb: A rich and romantic new standalone fantasy loosely inspired by the classic Sleeping Beauty fairy tale, from the New York Times bestselling author of Cruel Beauty!

Perfect for fans of These Violent Delights and The Shadow Queen.

Centuries ago, the heretic sorcerer Ruven raised a deadly briar around Runakhia's palace, casting the royal family into an enchanted sleep—and silencing the kingdom's gods.

Born with a miraculous gift, Lia's destiny is to kill Ruven and wake the royals. But when she succeeds, she finds her duty is not yet complete, for now she must marry into the royal family and forge a pact with a god—or die.

To make matters even worse, Ruven's spirit is haunting her.

As discord grows between the old and new guards, the queen sends Lia and Prince Araunn, her betrothed, on a pilgrimage to awaken the gods. But the old gods are more dangerous than Lia ever knew—and Ruven may offer her only hope of survival.

As the two work together, Lia learns that they're more alike than she expected. And with tensions rising, Lia must choose between what she was raised to believe and what she knows is right—and between the prince she is bound to by duty...and the boy she killed.

Review:

How far would you go for your god? Reylo meets Sleeping Beauty in this story about gods, sacrifice, and forbidden romance. Lia is a girl who was raised by nuns to follow her goddess, believing that she was raised to kill the evil heretic sorcerer Ruven and bring back the royal family that was cursed to sleep. When Lia does succeed in killing Ruven, to her great disbelief his ghost begins haunting her. She also discovers that she is forced to marry the newly awakened prince and that if she refuses she will be killed. It also doesn't help that the new queen is forcing her to prove that she is blessed by gods... but Lia soon discovers just how monstrous the gods can be and that her love for them does not mean they will love her in turn. Then there's the matter of the fact that she is falling in love with the ghost of the boy who represents everything she doesn't believe in and the fact that she will have to turn to him for help as she fakes her miracles *(least she be killed by the royal family for not being blessed by the proper gods and performing proper miracles). Can she find a way to survive the royal family and bring back the boy who has captured her heart, no matter how blasphemous their relationship is. This was definitely an interesting stand alone fantasy romance. The pacing of the book was slightly odd to me, it felt rushed at some parts but dragged on at others. Lia was a frustrating protagonist and honestly I have to give her some leeway because she is 17 years old and was raised by nuns... but this entire book felt like watching someone's religious discovery of deciding whether or not to believe in god. I did like the romance (despite the emotional whiplash of : I love him, I hate him, I'm gonna make out with this other guy, but I love him again). So I am in between giving this a 2 star vs a 3 star, but I will give it that bit of bonus because I liked the overall romance in the end. It wraps everything up neatly. If you are a fan of Reylo, I'd say give it a go because I think you'll have fun with it.

*Thanks Netgalley and HarperCollins Children's Books, Balzer + Bray for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

[helenababs]

songs by maddie zahm that make me think about helena bertinelli deeply:

where do all of the good kids go?

Parker made me a leader at thirteen They ran out of adults, the closest thing was me And that made the other kids kinda hate me They showed me just how alone alone could be

I lead worship when my best friend's mom died And that was an honor but if I'm honest, I was terrified I was way too young to lead people to the other side I thought so much about death, I couldn't live my life

I was always way too young To be that good at growing up Does anybody really know Where all of the good kids go? I was always way too young Now I can't catch up

I got drunk the first time at twenty-three A total black out, I didn't know when to leave I hated playing never have I ever So I hooked up with a random stranger I can't tell the difference between fun and danger

you might not like her:

If you would've told me I'd throw away my purity ring In the middle of an airport My younger self would laugh, would never believe that It's against everything that we stood for She'd hate that I've smoked weed and cuss frequently And she'd try to convert everyone I call a bestie You'll throw shots in the dark and black out at a bar There'll be good, then there'll be bad parts

Some days feel like whiplash, one-eighties, and you'll hate that

... and numb how you feel And you'll miss the old you, but here's the deal That good girl you were was really fucking bad at being real

Someday, you'll kiss a girl and you'll panic Some guy'll break your heart and you'll feel manic Then you'll learn to let people have shitty opinions And talk about your traumas and like the body you live in Someday, you'll learn to keep your own secrets Say you're doin' okay and really mean it You'll lose your faith a bit and question if she's you For a while you might not like her, but I do

if it's not god:

Be pretty and don't make it look like you're trying Told to be Esther, when I felt like Goliath When they were wrong, I could never keep quiet I searched for the truth, and had faith that I'd find it Set myself on fire Let myself be the liar All the Sundays, I worried I'd disappoint my mom 'Cause I never understood some types of love being wrong Something inside me was always steering left What Father picks a few just to leave the rest? I heard a voice inside my head, it disagreed So if it wasn't God, well, thank God it was me Thank God it was me They called me a sinner when I was a saint Hiding in her bedroom praying depression away Killing herself for eternal life And losing her interest to be a good wife

Thank God it was me, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah If it was God, then I don't have to worry He'll know why I left, why I ran in a hurry So either way I choose, I'm not wasting my life 'Cause the voice in my head has always been right

[enchxanting]

our love is god [ethan landry x reader] pt. 8

read part seven here || all parts

pairing: ethan landry x fem!reader

warnings: angst then fluff then angst again i'm gonna give you whiplash, emetophobia warning (not graphic just implied), discussion of suicide

a/n: next chapter is gonna be crazy... just fyi so stay tuned i lowkey can't believe i've kept up with this through 8 chapters but i'm glad i did because it's been super fun interacting with you guys and a rlly good writing exercise. enjoy this short chapter!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Diary,

Funerals blow. I suppose they blow more when you were the one to accidentally kill the person, but I think they still blow in general. I tried saying something to Tara when we were all throwing roses into the grave (I know, how trite), but I ended up talking to God instead. I said something dumb, like “Technically, I did not kill Tara, but, hey, who am I trying to kid, right?”

I’ve started coping with humor.

No one ever feels much like celebrating at a teenager’s funeral. Sam was a wreck; barely even talked. I started a conversation, but she just stared through me. Mindy and Chad kept trying to get my attention, but I’m still kind of avoiding them. It’s easier this way, just to be with Ethan.

Speaking of, he didn’t show. Of course, no one was expecting him to– except me. I don’t know, I thought he’d want to be here.

I should probably go. I’ve been away too long, it’s getting suspicious.

Y/N

I close my diary in my lap and shove it into my bag. I’ve been writing in one of the bathroom stalls for the last ten minutes. Trying to kick the hand-washing habit. It’s hard to do much of anything with chapped fingers. Even though Dr. Stone’s writing therapy feels useless, it keeps my hands busy.

Making my way out of the women’s room, I spot my parents in the far corner of the church lobby. My mom has her head down, and her glassy eyes tell me that she’s reading some Times article that we’ll discuss on the car ride home instead of my best friend’s tragic suicide. My dad has the same vacant stare, too, but he’s not absorbed in anything– just staring out a window on the opposite wall.

For some reason, the sight makes me sick– I can’t spend another minute watching it. I storm out of the doors, chest heaving. 

Crossing the street, I end up on a small patch of grass by the parking lot. I double over, short of breath, and everything comes up. I’d be mortified if I didn’t feel like shit.

As I finish retching, I feel a hand on my back. I stiffen and turn to look.

“Fuck, Y/N, are you okay?” It’s Chad, with Mindy close behind.

“Uh, yeah,” I say, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. “Sorry. Just overwhelmed.”

His eyes soften. “I get it.”

I can’t lie: it’s good to see the two of them. After avoiding everyone but Ethan for so long, the relief I feel at being with them outweighs my grief and guilt for the first time in days.

“Are you guys holding up any better than me?” I ask.

Chad laughs softly. “To be honest, no. I try not to think about it. I’ll get sucked into the cesspool of grief.”

“Yeah.” I nod in agreement. “I get that. What about you, Minds?”

She sighs. “Thinking too much, I guess.”

“Mm.”

There’s a long pause between all of us, but I don’t mind. I appreciate the quiet after the service.

Chad clears his throat. “So, um, we get that you’ve been MIA recently, and that’s cool because grieving is personal and all, but we miss you. A lot, actually. So will you please, please, please come have dinner with us tonight? At our place? Our parents are going out, so we can break into their wine cellar like we used to, I will cook, and Mindy will let you choose the movie for once.”

“I don’t know about that last bit,” Mindy intervenes, and Chad gives her a playful shove. “But, yeah. Please?”

I should probably say no, but, fuck, I miss them. “Okay.”

“Yes!” Chad hugs me tight, and pulls away, grinning. “We missed you, Y/N. Don’t be a stranger right now. We’re a team– you, me, Mindy, and Anika.”

Mindy groans. “Save your pep talks for your actual team. Season hasn’t even started yet, dork!”

“Yeah, whatever. We’ll see you tonight, okay?”

I roll my eyes at them as they walk away. “See you then.”

For the first time since Tara died, I let a big smile creep onto my face. Maybe this will all be okay.

That is, until I catch a glimpse of a dark jacket and curly hair in my peripheral vision. Turning sharply, I see Ethan, parked in his car across the street. He’s staring at Chad as he and Mindy walk towards their car.

Then he turns and looks at me, and my blood runs cold. His eyes are unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. There’s no hint of that softness I’ve become used to, but they’re not wild like last night in his car. His eyes are dark and stony, perfectly calculating.

Against my better judgment, I start towards his car, but his engine roars to life. He drops his gaze, and I stop before I reach the curb. 

Ethan speeds away without looking back.

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