#that’s a FASCINATING dynamic. i want you to elaborate. please. what happened there.
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hello i'm here again! i saw your tags on the get to know your characters post and i'd love to hear you talk about murdoc!! (also gondolin campaign 😮 tell me more :DDD )
HIHIHIHIHI IM SO HAPPY YOU'RE IN MY INBOX THANK YOU FOR LOVING MY BOY YOU ARE A GIFT OF A PERSON ;w; i assume you don't mind if i answer these for murdoc then :0
What is the character’s go-to drink order? here's the thing: i think if murdoc is ordering, it's ale. just ale. murdoc is an alcohol snob, largely on account of being a hobbit AND specifically on account of his aunt being a brewer (and so therefore clearly HIS family's ale is the best), so it's an opportunity for him to be just a little bit showily snobbish and judgy and more knowledgeable about his choice of drink than the average patron, but it's not quite so personal to him as, say, tea would be. (murdoc never orders tea. from anywhere. he only drinks his own, or radagast's, or that of a few other trusted friends. tea is his craft. it's personal to him. he picks and dries and blends the herbs for his own brews. it's personal long before he even gets to brewing a cup, and there's meaning in just that act in and of itself already.) so, murdoc gets to be an alcohol snob in public, but it's a matter of showing off for fun. he'll scoff at ale from anywhere but his own inn, but he'll still order it and drink it. and enjoy it more than he puts on a show about.
What is their grooming routine? murdoc likes a long bath. murdoc likes to put a lot of effort into wrangling his hair in particular, when he has the time and effort in him for it. alone, at the inn, where he can rest and take breaks and manage things, shaving the back of his neck is very important to him (sensory comfort, and tied in a way to his sense of self). he doesn't like scents or anything of the sort, he just wants to feel... clean. put-together. both in the privacy and comfort of their respective homes, and while out on the road, letting ríros braid his hair for him becomes a very important part of murdoc's grooming routine. on a good day, it's a visible tie to someone he cares deeply for. on a bad day, it's accepting help with his sensory needs and energy levels, and allowing himself to be taken care of by someone he trusts.
What was their most expensive purchase/where does their disposable income go? oh, murdoc's cloak was ABSOLUTELY the most expensive singular thing he's ever purchased. it may not be real dragon scale, sure but. it's a fine fabric, and the faux scales are well crafted and gorgeous. it's luxurious and sturdy and him in every way. an item with presence. which, to the point, i do think murdoc is generally the sort of person who spends his disposable income on fine things to wear. having fun with and taking pride in his appearance is important to him, and he's financially comfortable enough for that bit of luxury.
Do they have any scars or tattoos? aside from the missing hand (extremely notable), and whatever assorted and unspecified scars he's picked up from adventuring? (which. he has. he's come close to dying before. he's got a few marks.) murdoc has a scar across his nose from some absolutely stupid shit he got up to as an utter hellion of a child. i think he probably fell and bashed his face open running to escape getting caught pulling a prank on farmer maggot or something like that. nothing angsty about it, just complete and utter childhood stupidity and rambunctiousness. something visible left on him from a time before he was overly concerned with responsibility, or duty of care, and entertaining his drive for adventure in much less consequential ways. (he’s also very freckled. i think it’s very adorable how much he freckles.)
What was the last time they cried, and under what circumstances? the last time i know for certain that murdoc cried, was after facing irmo. maybe not immediately. maybe much later, on the road home, having spilled the story to his companions and having thoroughly exhausted himself from hanging onto it all. but i'm sure he did cry. from anger at what was done to him, to his dreams, by a power larger than him, without any say of his own in it all. from all his internalization of himself as a weapon finally breaking over, from hearing that perception of himself lovingly rebuffed by the people who care about him. from fully and completely admitting that he's afraid of the person he's made himself in the face of the horrors, but that he would've hated the person he would have been for ignoring them. from exhaustion. from having to question his sense of self yet again. from a lot of things, really. you don't get personally chosen by a god and come away from it quite the same.
Are they an oldest, middle, youngest or only child? oh murdoc is an eldest sibling and it shows. maybe not by actual sibling birth order, but he was adopted by his uncles and aunt as a baby and very much raised as their eldest child. he's got two rascals of younger cousins, raised alongside him, to look out for. they're practically younger siblings from an actual family dynamics standpoint. and besides, he's got all the Eldest Child of being the brandybuck family heir apparent put on him. where else would the responsibility complex and the duty of care complex and the possessiveness over what's his and, most importantly, go-to instinct of sassing the literal servants of sauron have come from? This Man Is An Eldest Child And He Can Do This All Day <3
Describe the shoes they’re wearing. none. Those Feet Are Bare. and hairy. he DOES meticulously wash and brush his foot hair though. but listen. he's a hobbit. he's not FROM a culture that does shoes, and the one (1) time in his life ever that he had to wear them, his only takeaway from the experience is that they are a sensory nightmare that he will not be subjecting himself to under ANY circumstances.
Describe the place where they sleep. ooohhhh i think both at home in the inn and also to the greatest extent on the road possible, murdoc does cozy. i think his (+ his partner's) room at the inn is covered in like. throw pillows. nice big comfy sleeping pillows. lots of soft blankets. it's all very warm and inviting and kinda maximalist in a plush sort of way. i do think he cares about aesthetics and all his pillows and blankets look nice together, but everything is selected with comfort in mind. it's homey. it's warm. he's a hobbit. it's probably not particularly neat, but it's sort of charming in the way where it looks like a space that's meant to be curled up in. he probably accidentally leaves a few stray tea mugs about and this is his worst living space habit, but it adds to the charm as long as he remembers to actually keep up on putting them away (which. he does. he's just on top of it enough to make sure he has clean mugs to actually use for tea, but this may be the only reason he remembers). i think even on the road he'll bring as many blankets as is reasonable to carry and do his utmost not only to make his sleeping space, but the whole camp's, as cozy and welcoming as possible with whatever he has.
What is their favorite holiday? ohh see i don't know if i do know enough about specific hobbitish holidays offhand for this, but in general i do think murdoc is a holidays kind of person. anything sort of extrovert-oriented, where he can feast and dance and get drunk and just be around people, is very much his sort of thing. when he was growing up in the shire, any occasion where gandalf showed up with fireworks was an immediate favorite. for least favorite... i don't know how he feels about new year's (yule, in the hobbitish calendar). i don't think he hates it but. i think he's someone who lives with a bit of a sense of loss over who he was, or might have been, before his dreams and irmo and everything, and i think nostalgia-oriented celebrations grate just slightly up against that.
What objects do they always carry around with them? tea. lots of it. kept in his pockets. (he smells like it. it’s nice.) usually a particular brew (the flavor profile of which i imagine to be something like london fog) that he made for himself, which is very personal to him. a locket with his partner's portrait in it. an ornately carved matchbox, always full of matches, ready to light an arrow or for whatever else he may use his fire for. additionally, on the road: a jar in which he cultivates a toxic fungus, used for coating his weapons in tough battles. a set of his favorite cooking knives. a flask or two of his family’s ale, primarily used in his cooking, as ornate and pretty as all else he owns. (i will also give him that he most always is wearing jewelry, particularly his ruby necklace and earring set. the necklace in particular is important - usually maedhros resides in ríros’ sword, but the necklace is an ideal secondary vessel on the occasions that maedhros does have to remain where murdoc is, and murdoc has selected these pieces in maedhros’ colors for a reason).
as this has gotten LONG i will not try to do them for my new beloved tyelperëkko antar JUST yet. BUT @jaz-the-bard is planning to run a campaign set in gondolin in the first age and i am VERY excited for the character i have made. i’ve given them the oathsworn background. they’re going to be a loyal follower of maeglin, once he exists, but for NOW they’re a devotee of turgon. this is going to go great for them and cause no problems at all (lying).
#ALSO HI HI HI I SAW YOUR ELINYEL ANSWERS FOR THESE AND THEY MADE ME LOVE HER A LOT#man but i DO have some feelings about her before and during the war#like i know she’s your BBEG but. something about going from sleeping in a room full of trinkets and things her best friend gifted to her.#to just. not even sleeping. never mind in a room surrounded by reminders of people who care for her just. trancing. while riding.#something about that shift makes me INTENSELY sad for her??????#and like that’s not even the only way you’ve shown her self-care deteriorate.#not spending money on herself. not keeping up her hobbies or spending any more time than necessary on so much as taking a bath.#her shoes *look* fine but are being held up from disrepair through magic#something about her shoes feels like it’s getting SO much at Her. MAN.#also youngest but heir?? :0#that’s a FASCINATING dynamic. i want you to elaborate. please. what happened there.#anyhow i love elinyel a lot!!!!!!!#and thank you for loving murdoc thank you for giving me a chance to answer these!!! :0#if i do them later for antar of gondolin campaign would you want to see? :0#aaaaaaa <33333#beloved mutual is beloved!!!!!!!!#also#i do feel like some important context for like. the way murdoc connects to his appearance + grooming routine is. he’s trans.#cannot stress that enough#mirkwood campaign#nelyo askbox
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hey! first of all, the idea of baby!au is fantastic. I love all your points. you already wrote about galex "stressed out of their minds new age parents" and that was fascinating to read! would you mind to elaborate the same about carlando? pretty please 🥺🙏🏻
Awww! Thank you!!!
Of course I can write a Carlando one!
Carlos and Lando didn't mean to adopt Oscar. It just sort of happened. One minute they are in Australia and the next thing they are taking a 1 month baby home. Thankfully Carlos know how to take care of a baby and make a bottle and change a diaper because Lando was incredibly lost.
Lando is very sensitive to Oscar's emotions and baby's are very emotionally volatile. While Oscar is much calmer than other babies, it can go from 0 to 100 really quick. Lando's vibe is "Oh my god, what am I doing? I don't know what I'm doing. Wait, I do know what I am doing. Nevermind, I was very wrong."
Carlos is a bit more capable due to experience but the downside is Oscar prefers Lando more and it makes taking care of him incredibly difficult. Carlos brings a "I want to help you. Just let me help you" energy that quickly becomes "I know you communicate mostly through crying but can you try a different method." Carlos wants to zone out sometimes but he can't.
Oscar wrecks terror on their marriage and social life. The only thing that is really intact is their job. Oscar's pickiness pushes an unequal distribution of labor in certain areas which strains the marriage. Oscar also doesn't have the energy to be around a lot of people for long periods of time, and his parents keep an active social life.
They had to go to couples counseling a month into the adoption which helped them find equal ground when it came to balancing childcare and their marriage. It also helped that Oscar met Logan and now was fairly content as long as he got to play with Logan.
Lando also started bringing Oscar onto his streams which garnered him a ton of new subscribers. Oscar was fairly content being held and staring at the lights and moving pictures and people found him to be adorable.
Oscar slowly enjoys Carlos's company without Lando in the picture but Carlos is the more responsible party. Feeding, doctor appointments, making sure Oscar has a hat every time he goes outside to protect him from the sun.
The one activity they do enjoy together is golf. They get a couple hours on the course and Oscar gets to sit in his carrier and nap in the golf cart.
Babies are expensive and Oscar is no exception. The issue is that the biggest expense is the wi-fi. Oscar has a designated time to see Logan, whether it be in-person or through Face Time. If George and Alex are free, a play date is an easy thing to organize. However, a face time call is usually the result. The issue lies in Oscar falling asleep with the phone in his hand but will wake up and cry if the phone is removed.
Oscar, like Logan, is a clingy baby. Even though he doesn't say it, he still clings to Carlos's shirt when he has to leave for the race. While he doesn't cry most of the time, he does get upset and hides his face. He also does the same thing with Lando. Carlos is sad but he laughs it off and tells Oscar he'll be back. Lando, however, will carry Oscar as much as he can and is very reluctant to hand him over to the caretaker. While he doesn't cry, Oscar's sad little face and his outstretched hands makes the departure very difficult.
I hope you like it! It's not as cheery as the one I did for Galex but I wanted to show the difference in dynamic and parenting style.
Thank you for sending the ask and feel free to send me more!!!! :)
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lane u can't just say "pandoralecto" and leave it at that i need to know more please
it seems i’m incapable of talking about pairings without making a moodboard recently… but anyways YES let me tell you about them.
alecto is our resident radfem man-hating lesbian who can’t help but conform to patriarchal ideals in her quest to redeem herself and her family in the eyes of the rich elite. she’s mean and selfish and brutal yet she still cares what others think of her. pandora on the other hand could not give less of a fuck what anyone is saying about her, yet she just happens to be this (on the outside) “perfect woman.” she’s blonde and beautiful with delicate features and she’s rich and she throws elaborate parties that everyone who’s anyone is invited to. and she does it just because she wants to. pandora has never done a single thing she didnt want to do, and she’s praised for it. people don’t seem to care that she’s blunt and apathetic because she’s beautiful and alecto hates her for this. but she also wants to be her. she becomes jealously obsessed with pandora and somewhere along the way that blurs into lust. and it’s so ugly and gross but she wants to literally cut pandora open and wear her skin. she can’t help it.
then we have pandora, who is just living her life carefree exactly the way she wants to and there’s alecto standing in the corner of her party with an untouched martini just glaring at everyone. and pandora is like. what is her problem? alecto is so full of rage and pandora cannot understand how a person can hold so much inside of them and she doesn’t like it. she thinks alecto has the most massive stick up her ass and her failure to understand this woman bleeds into disdain for her. but it also means pandora cannot get alecto out of her head. she’s a natural observer and she finds herself to be so fascinated by other people because she’s so different from them. she’s low empathy like her brother but entranced by the way people interact with each other in a normative context. she cannot for the life of her understand why alecto cares so much about anything but for some reason she can’t get herself to leave alecto alone. their whole relationship is pandora doing things to get reactions out of alecto. good or bad. seeing what will make her tick. constantly antagonizing her. she’s obsessed with alecto just as much as alecto is obsessed with her. she wants to break her so bad.
their fighting turns into violent make outs which lead to creepy power-play sex. who will get the upper hand. it’s a fight to the death. they’re both trying to rip the other open.
also i thought it would be interesting to explore their relationship in the context of both of them being in some type of weird codependent twincest relationship. they don’t hinge on this but like pandoras relationship with evan is about belonging and alecto’s relationship with amycus is about dominating. so i think the pandoralecto sexual dynamic would be flipped. alecto finds their violent sex dynamic surprisingly fulfilling because it’s equal. they’re both women!! she’s not performing. she’s at her most feral and imperfect and pandora still wants her in some weird way. she feels more comfortable taking on a submissive role because she doesn’t have to uphold this power over pandora that she feels she has to uphold when she has sex with men. for pandora sex with her brother is not about sex. it’s very intimate and like. idk something otherworldly. but sex with alecto is about sex. it’s lust and obsession. i think she realizes that alecto has never not been in control and she wants to flip that. she wants to get on top of alecto and see what happens. she takes the reins because alecto has always had an iron grip on them.
tl;dr: they’re feral and they hate each other and they’re obsessed with each other at the same time. they both have an inability to let things go once they’ve zeroed in and that’s what drives this dynamic. they just can’t stop!
#oh geez… essay alert#this took a while because i had to stew and make a pinterest board and rant to renn about them#but i’m so fascinated by them#i haven’t stopped thinking about them for a second since i got this ask#pandoralecto#anons#lanes moodboards
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A short list of things that bother me about the Magisterium canon:
Forgive me in advance for rambling, I have to get these thoughts out of my brain lmao (also it's been a couple years so correct me if I'm wrong! (I really hope I’m wrong on some of these :’) )) Spoilers ahead obviously!
● The lack of Calron :(
● Not taking the opportunity to develop Tamara's character and keeping her static until she's randomly just different. Strong female characters aren't just skilled and perfect until their one flaw (usually it's having feelings like any other human being) is revealed shockingly (that's just sloppy characterization), they should be crucial to the plot and not overlooked in favor of developing other characters (from what I remember she literally was my favorite while reading the series until she just got annoying (??) after a while, of course that could just be because the story is told through Call's perspective but still)
● The entire school system that I need more info on bc it sounds so unthought out and not like something that has existed for hundreds of years
● The forceful nature of making people serve as masters?? That makes no sense? Like, “Congratulations on not dying during your schooling or in the war(s), your prize is forced labor 👍.”
● Also THE COLLEGIUM WAS MENTIONED AND NEVER ELABORATED UPON
● TGT. Least favorite book. Get out. Tgt truthers how do you do it??
● The Maugris plot twist. It destroys the meaning behind the past four books. It's just so uncalled for and frankly just sloppy ig? I love the idea in a way, but only if it's foreshadowed from the beginning. Also I'm too attached to the complicated dynamic of Alastair raising his possible ex-bestie for it to end up like that
● The fact that the iron trio is out of school for half the series, I'd like to know what's normal, y'know??
● THE LACK OF ELABORATION ABOUT THE FIRST GEN I WANT TO KNOW MORE I HAVE TO KNOW MORE
● They did my man Constantine especially wrong, give him some ✨️character✨️ aside from E V I L and problematic (trademark) and charming (???)
● AND ALASTAIR GOD TELL ME MORE?? He's characterized as distant and obviously traumatized with his hate of his magic involved past but I just need to know what that past was like. Like who was he before his dead wife syndrome?? Idk but I'd of liked any excuse to know more about it just so I can understand him more??
● Please give me a single character trait of Declan's?? Like he was mentioned a handful of times and that's all we got. He was just some guy and I am hating it !!
● And Sarah. Like. She was a mom and liked peace as a concept but she also made a cool ass knife. That's a lot of things left up for interpretation. And I know Call wasn’t allowed to ask questions for plot reasons but god i wish he had more information about his own dead mother for Christ's sake
● Also other than a victim, who was Jericho? I need to know who this kid who drew scribbles in the margins of his very important journal while writing about how he was slowly being killed was. What was his relationship really like with his brother if he was so scared to say that he was dying or what gave him the impression that he didn't care?? It's fascinating and I need him under a microscope immediately
● Also the lack of queer representation until the last two books. AND THEN IT WASN'T EVEN ANY OF OUR MAIN CAST. Literally the saddest L ever :(
● AND AARON WAS NEVER CONFIRMED QUEER LIKE WHAT THE FUCK JUST L O O K AT HIS CHARACTER AND INFACT ALL OF OUR CORE CAST IS AT LEAST BI LIKE C O M E O N (ik they're like kids but even I knew I was not straight when I was like 11 and i lived in the most conservative non-LGBTQ-friendly town known to man)
● Low key, callmara was so bad, like I love them but not the way it happened, horrible set up. Tamara deserved so much better and to not have her entire character destroyed by becoming a love interest. I wish they thought about her as an independent character instead of the means to implement a romantic subplot in tgt, they did so good in the first books with that
● Also there's no elaboration on what chaos is. It's the mystical 5th element. Wow! Let's go girl, give us nothing! You'd think that if Makaris were so exceptionally rare and special that we'd get some explanation on how they come to be and what it is exactly that they can control but we're just left to assume it's the special "chosen one" type of thing. Idk it bothers me for some reason :/
That's just off the top of my head and it's been years since I read the series all the way through (I should do a reread soon). For the most part I adore this funky series and I hate to bash it but I felt the need to ramble about it's shortcomings because I'm not crazy, right?? It had so much potential! Anyway, I'm sort of glad for the blanks in the story despite complaining about them because it leaves room for fics and fan interpretations that I always love to see, but on the other hand, I'd like for the story to feel finished and not like a last minute science fair project.
Thanks for sticking around for my late night rambling lmao
#magisterium#magisterium series#tamara rajavi#aaron stewart#callum hunt#maugris#alastair hunt#constantine madden#declan novak#sarah hunt#jericho madden#rambling
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Love In The Air episode 3 live reaction under the cut (long post)
Prapai is actually such a cutie
But so is Payu when he's smiling to himself (a smile that's usually meant for Rain)
Rain is baby tho
And Sky has their shared braincell like 99% of the time
Why is he writing on the board in English lol
And the way the camera pans over "How to date him in 30 days" and then snaps back to "him" xD
Love how Sky asks but then accepts it with no further questions <3
Also Rain keeps pretending he's only doing this so Payu will stop calling him stupid but it was Rain himself who decided that the only way to get Payu to stop was to make him fall in love (totally logical conclusion ofc that has nothing to do with the fact that he would have let Payu do whatever he wanted to him in that bathroom stall)
Rain should have brought gifts or notes to leave for Payu when he wasn't there come on dude make him think of you
OH. PRAPAI AND SKY DEFINITELY ALREADY HAVE SOMETHING GOING ON!!! Prapai was in a good mood and said it was thanks to Payu - and Sky didn't elaborate on what happened that night and just said he was fine AND NOW HE'S WALKING IN WITH A BIG FAT HICKEY ON HIS NECK boiiiis you ain't slick
Sky is so done with Rain lmao
Hahaha the dude working at the garage is the real MVP he's the shipper the matchmaker the enabler the supporter the sidekick that makes Payu's plan work I love him
PAHAHAHA RAIN FORCING HIMSELF TO BE POLITE
Payu really has a thing for politeness, huh? Or is it just about being dominant 👀
RAIN PRETENDING HE DOESN'T LIKE PAYU AND DOESN'T CARE BOIII DROP THE ACT
Rain is such a little brat I LOVE their dynamic
He's actually playing hard to get which means Payu ends up having to work for it (which only works because Payu is already interested) which does in fact help with making him fall in love
RAIN ANNOUNCING THAT HE'S HITTING ON PAYU TO THE WHOLE RESTAURANT LMAO
PAYU WANTING TO BE FED AND RAIN GOING "you have hands" I FUCKING CAN'T WITH THESE TWO who thought the cute one would be the cold one and the cool guy would be all soft and smiley
"Try replacing my 'stupid' with 'cute'" SO EVERY TIME HE SAID STUPID HE MEANT CUTE THIS MAN IS ALREADY HEAD OVER HEELS
And Rain gets sooooo shy about it awwwww babyyyyyyy and his smile is so adorable aaaaaa
Sky is still so done with Rain (same bby) and the guy behind Rain is fascinated with the taste of his pen cap wtf is going on
Rain still playing hard to get huh
And Aon getting caught in the middle of PayuRain
Every time Rain plays hard to get a little smile breaks through his stern face bc he can't contain the butterflies he gets from Payu's affection and I think that's beautiful
"What are you looking at?" - "A cutie." <3<3<3
OHMYGAWD THE CUTENESS
The shippers lmaoooo I love them
NOOO DON'T TAKE A NAP YOU'LL BE LATE
The dream tho lol
NOOO RAIN YOU GOTTA PERSIST
He doesn't accept comforting from his crush but goes to see Payu awwwwww
The way Payu packs up his things IMMEDIATELY so he can go home and comfort Rain who's been waiting for him in the pouring rain
THE WAY HE GETS DOWN ON ONE KNEE AND EXTENDS HIS ARMS TO RAIN WHO'S SITTING ON THE FLOOR aaaaaa this is so beautiful he's offering physical contact but leaving the choice up to Rain unlike Ple who squeezed Rain's arm AND RAIN GOES FOR THE HUG which mirrors how he removed Ple's hand from his arm I AM NEVER GOING TO BE NORMAL ABOUT THIS
He called him good boy oh my
How to make him fall in love with you: break down crying in his arms
"I'm here if you want to talk" THE PLE PARALLELS ARE ACCUMULATING
Payu actually helping Rain to learn from his mistakes and agreeing with his teacher but also sympathizing with him aaaaaaaa so wholesome and healthy
HE CALLED HIM NAUGHTY BOY how many more nicknames does this guy have for Rain
I just need them to kiss again please
"You'll get sick. I don't want to take care of you." HIS LITTLE SMILE WHEN HE PULLED AWAY MEANS EVERYTHING TO ME
Bonus scene: AWWW HE REALLY WAS CRUSHING FROM THE START
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N P T Y!
thanks for the ask! i kinda went ham on the AU question lol
N - Name three things you wish you saw more of in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).
oof this is hard! the thing is. i'm an extremely fickle mistress, so i don't really have a 'main' fandom? also i think most of what i want from fandom is extremely generic (more gen fic, more femslash, more AUs with interesting worldbuilding, more rarepairs etc etc) and most of my specific comments are aimed more at the source material than at the fandom
(that said, if anyone writes political intrigue and/or the mundane stuff of nation building about the Kree/Skrull Alliance please please please link! there's so much story potential there..............)
P - Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas).
okay so i LOVE most AUs, but my favorite are well-done roleswaps (by which i mean the characters' core personalities are intact, it's just that their circumstances have changed). I mean... i still lowkey think about the Persona 4 adult investigation team AU a friend and I talked about almost 10 years ago lol
(oh! speaking of the Persona franchise, i've always kind of wondered what would happen if P4 protag moved to Sumaru City after P4 and gets Jun Kashihara from Persona 2 as his homeroom teacher, and one way or another accidentally triggers a way for Nyarlathotep to return (most likely with P4 protag coming into contact with Tatsuya by chance through Jun)—after all, the theme of Persona 4 is to lift the fog of deceit, but not all truths should be remembered... though I guess this isn't really AU since it could theoretically happen as long as you handwave the mechanics about how personas/Nyarly and Philemon work)
my other pet AU is the Appmon Utena AU because narratives about roles and agency fascinate me! (appmon and utena endgame spoilers in linked posts)
as for something that I'm mostly making up right now........... uhhhh Loveless AU for Oda and Aoki from 2.43 Seiin High School Men's Volleyball Team, but only about the concept of Fighter-Sacrifice pairs and not... everything else (I have not read Loveless but it's got A Reputation)—mostly because i think it'd be so interesting if their pair name is "Selfless", seeing as Oda tends to think of himself as selfish in the novel, while Aoki's speech about "no need to thank me, I'm doing this because of ulterior motives" and his utter devotion to Oda's cause makes me kiiinda feral. (and from what little i understand about the general power dynamics of Fighters and Sacrifices, i think it makes sense for Oda to be the Sacrifice and Aoki the Fighter? idk)
i haven't thought of why they're marked, since they're meant to be Just Some Guys in 2.43 (i.e. not one of the star players on the team)
T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending?
i'm not willing to die on this hill, but i have this entire elaborate headcanon about Euanthe from Counter/WEIGHT having a dead fiance and them being essentially an anti-stratus due to the programming language disconnect between the Divines and the Apostolisian mechs. both are just something i pulled completely out of my ass tho (note: Twilight Mirage is the last sci-fi season from friends at the table that i've completed)
as for something i'm slightly more willing to die defending: Yukiko and Chie from Persona 4 lived on takeout for like 4 months after they got their own place, before grudgingly learning how to cook at the Inaba community center (also Yosuke heckles them about it and sends shitty pics of his humble homemade dishes at ridiculous hours to taunt them about it—at least, that's how they interpret his gesture
and i mean. they aren't entirely wrong about that.)
Y - What are your secondhand fandoms (i.e., fandoms you aren’t in personally but are tangentially familiar with because your friends/people on your dash are in them)?
oh boy most popular media is like that for me... i feel like ORV is one of these even though i did read some of it? (and i mean. i do plan on reading past ch 75 of ORV one of these days.) i've heard stuff about SVSSS (about a rarepair/side character) and the Owl House seems interesting from the general impression i get from my dash
I guess i also. learned about SPN on tumblr (and know more than I want to, even though in the grand scheme of things it's not much at all)
[ask prompts here!]
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Blackberry Winters.
PART 1 🌸 PART 2
Namjoon Werewolf Au!!
Pack Head Alpha Namjoon and mate OC!
Arranged marriage sort of?
Pack dynamics / strangers to lovers.
Part 3
“You did not think to tell him no? To demand that you had every right to stay there?” Her mother in law looked disappointed , eyes trained on her as Jiah carefully pulled the blouse of the tunic down over her tummy, frowning when she realized that it didn’t do a thing for her figure.
She felt self conscious, the grey cotton of the tunic making her feel drab and lifeless. Why did she always choose clothes in colors like this? Why did none of them fit her right? Why did she never make an effort to look at least a little good. Her hair was limp, a mousy brown and while it was thick, it had no luster… Why didn’t she use one of the hundred powdered mixtures the village healer liked to give the younger women?
“Jiah, are you listening to me?” Namjoon’s mother said sharply and Jiah jumped a bit, guilty.
“I didn’t want to be a bother..” She said nervously, not sure how to handle her mother in law. On the one hand she seemed to be understanding of her many hang ups, but she also looked impatient and upset, anytime Jiah failed to stand up for herself.
Lady Kim drew herself up to her impressive height and Jiah cowered. She’d hung around enough pack bonfires to recognize that stance and that gaze. The woman was about to give her a piece of her mind.
Sure enough, her voice thundered when she addressed her.
“If you keep viewing yourself as a bother, I’m not sure how others will begin seeing you as anything else. You’re the head alpha’s mate. Your place is by his side, helping him with the crown on his head. It’s not a choice. Your duties are not mine and I am tired of doing them for you.” She snapped.
It stung. Guilt churned and Jiah could feel the beginnings of one of her episodes. The ones that always left her shaking and breathless. Much to her surprise, Lady Kim’s gaze softened at that and the next second she was being drawn into a warm embrace.
“Good lord child, why are you so terrified? Has my family not been kind enough to take away this stark terror out of your veins?” She sighed deeply. “You must not let your fears dictate your life. I want you to live your life, pleasing the person you’re bound to .”
Jiah felt her shoulders sag. Please the person she was bound to. Of course. Namjoon. It all came down to the alpha wolf. And how was she supposed to please him, if he couldn’t bear to be in the same room as her?
“Yourself.” Lady Kim’s voice, laced with amusement made her jump.
Jiah frowned, pulling back to look at the older woman in confusion.
“You’re bound only to yourself , Jiah. You need to please yourself. To do and be the person you want to be. And then everything else will fall into place.”
Jiah watched as the woman went back to the door, calling for and directing a few more workers as they finished setting up the outer courtyard of her living quarters. Still a little chilled, she grabbed a thick coat from the small cupboard by the door, draping it over herself and tying it together with the sash. She moved quickly to the door, watching her mother in law talk to the workers, looking them straight in the eye , firm and clear in her instructions.
It was fascinating.
Lady Kim’s stance fairly vibrated with power and her voice brooked no disobedience. People looked at her and listened. They saw someone who knew what she was talking about and many a time, Jiah had felt it herself, the comfort of someone reliable. Someone who wished no ill on anyone.
Namjoon’s mother had lost her husband at a young age. Namjoon had scarcely been a babe of two when it had happened and the entire pack had expected the young wolf to lose his birthright as the heir. It was unheard of for a mate to take over the head alpha’s duties but Lady Kim had risen to the occasion with an elegance that had stunned everyone. The woman had met pack leaders and settled disputes, had negotiated boundary conflicts and made elaborate plans for new buildings , all while carrying around a babe that was still fed at her breast.
What was more, she had defended her position against the men who had wanted to usurp it. Mnhyuk and Jaejoon were two of her husband’s cousins, eager to sink their fangs into the woman to mate her, just to be able to get their hands on the pack. They were terrible men , even worse wolves. Their ideas on how the pack ought to be run dripping with archaic ideals and oppression of women.
But Lady Kim had humiliated them, told the whole pack in no uncertain terms that the next pack alpha would be Kim Namjoon. Her son would be raised to rule the pack with kindness and understanding and she would make sure of it.
The tales were told with hushed tones of disbelief and admiration and Jiah had listened to them with hunger and aching. Had felt such a huge surge of affection for the matron , had wanted to hug her and tell her she had done a great job.
And standing here as her daughter in law, she realized that she would be a fool not to listen to her. Not to learn from her. Especially when it was obvious that in the entire pack, the only one who didn’t seem to hold Kim Namjoon on a pedestal, was ironically his own mother.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“ They’re going to challenge you again. I can feel it.” Taehyung said gruffly, dropping the bundle of scrolls on the table and Namjoon flinched, head throbbing.
“That bad?” He asked hesitantly and Taehyung nodded.
“They want you to re-negotiate that treaty about courtesans owning property. Think it would make them quit the profession… if you let them own stuff” Seokjin said quietly and Namjoon bristled.
“They are no different from any of us. They work for their pay too. Why shouldn’t they be allowed to do what they wish with money that they’ve earned?” He demanded angrily.
“You’re a good man Namjoon. A fair one. And you’re striving to build a pack that treats all it members as equals . Obviously people who thrive on abusing their power aren’t going to like that. Especially Minhyuk and Jaejoon’s pups. Those two are terrible.”
“You should accept their challenge and just rip their throats out someday.” Taehyung said firmly AND Namjoon gave him a glare.
“I’m not going to shed blood without cause, Taehyung. Don’t suggest that. Even in passing.” He said firmly and the younger beta bowed politely in apology.
“Where is Jiah?” Seokjin asked casually.
Namjoon glanced at him, brows raised.
“Since when are you so familiar with my mate, hyung?”
Seokjin rolled his eyes.
“She used to come sit with me, when I watched over the herds on the outer pastures. Sweet little thing really. Very funny too.”
That made Namjoon pause.
“Funny?” He asked, completely confused.
“Witty. She would make these clever little riddles and jokes that would always leave me in stitches. We made a game of it. I would give her one of my funny jokes and she would give me a riddle. Is she feeling better now?”
Namjoon who was still kind of struck dumb by the idea of his cowering, reticent mate doing something as…. Normal and friendly as laughing and being witty….. could only stare at Seokjin in confusion.
“I…. Yes. She’s well. We’re expecting a pup.” He said softly.
Both Taehyung and Seokjin went still.
“What?!!! Why didn’t you say that first?!!” Taehyung exclaimed, offended.
“It’s not that important…” Namjoon waved it off, reaching for the scrolls , “ what about the treaties, then? You did tell Jungkook we aren’t changing anything right?”
Seokjin scoffed.
“ Only you would say that these treaties are more important than your own pup.” He snapped.
Namjoon sighed a bit at that.
“I don’t mean that. I’m just saying, what she needs now is to rest and take care of herself and the baby. I’m not what she needs . I’ve arranged for her to stay in some private quarters with the other women.”
Seokjin sighed deeply. After years of being one of Namjoon’s trusted friends, he could feel his heart ache for the younger and all that he hid from the people around him. He reached out and gently placed a palm on Namjoon’s shoulder.
“ Namjoon, you don’t have to do all of this by yourself. Tae and I , we can take over duties a couple of days a week… You can relax… Maybe spend some time with your new wife….”
“She hates me.” Namjoon said softly. “ I spent a whole month trying to talk to her, all she did was tremble and shake. Even when we…” Namjoon exhaled sharply, “ Even in bed , she made me feel like I was some kind of…. Predator.”
Taehyung bit his lips, looking worried.
“You’re not… You’re not going to break the bond are you?” He asked nervously.
Namjoon sighed.
“I’m not. I may have considered it, before . But now… She’s with pup. I can’t do that to her. I don’t want to either.”
“Why did you pick her?”
Namjoon stayed quiet.
“Because you wanted a wife who wouldn’t ask or demand or complain.” Taehyung said distastefully.
“That’s not… You make it sound so terrible. I’m supposed to be taking over pack duties, supposed to renegotiate every single treaty we’ve drawn in the past twenty years, not to mention get the entire pack ready for the winter…. Of course I wanted a wife who would adjust. Have you seen the omegas in our clan? The ones I could court ? They want to leave on trips… They want to visit the neighbouring packs…. They want me to arrange festivities and feasts for every damn thing…. You think I can marry someone like that??” Namjoon snapped angrily. “none of them understand a damn thing about helping me out. They’re shallow and vain. Jiah… I chose her because she didn’t seem like one of them. She seemed like she could understand what it means to be my wife. But I was wrong. I thought she understood my responsibilities and was giving me my space…. Turns out she just thinks I’m some kind of monster she needs to run and hide from.”
Seokjin reached out, patting his back soothingly.
“Namjoon I understand… It’s been hard on you, and you’ve been doing all of it by yourself. Its bound to take a toll. And that’s why I think you should take a few days off, a week. Give us all the instructions. We’ll carry it all out. You can relax.”
“That’s exactly what my uncles want. For me to slack off. They’ll summon the council and want to challenge me again. I can’t afford it. “ Namjoon shook his head.” Not until the babe is born and my position as pack alpha is solidified. I can’t let them use this against me.”
Seokjin and Taehyung exchanged looks.
“Joon-ah….”
Namjoon gave both of them a tired smile.
“I’ll be fine hyung. It’s going to be okay.” He said reassuringly. “ The council’s meeting tomorrow right? I’ll try to go over these tonight.”
“Its already past sundown.” Taehyung said worriedly.
“Then I better ask the maids to keep enough oil for the lamp to last.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“What are you doing here?” Namjoon blinked, staring at her like she was out of her mind and Jiah flinched. Maybe this whole thing was a mistake. But the sight of him made something curl in the pit of her stomach. He looked exhausted. Like he had been up all night. She wondered if perhaps she ought to retreat. Go back to the private quarters he’d arranged for her.
No. No , you will not chicken out of this.
“ You have a council meeting, this evening. Could I come with you?.” She said softly, watching his face carefully. She tried to read his emotions, tried to look for traces of irritation or anger but all she found was a sort of hopeless resignment. Like he had stopped trying to fight whatever was bringing him down.
“Come with me….?? ” Namjoon stared at her like he wasn’t quite sure what she was talking about.
She inhaled sharply.
“Your mother told me I could go. As your mate, I’m allowed to sit in on council meetings. She told me it’s a new provision. That you were the one who had it written in. So perhaps, you should… let me come with you.”
“My mother-“ He paused, sighing. “ You don’t have to do everything my mother asks you to.”
She blinked, the words throwing her off. The truth was, she had been the one, tailing the older woman all day, trying to see what she did and how she did it. Lady Kim had merely offered to help her do her duties. She had mentioned in passing, that for centuries , mates hadn’t been granted many rights of their own. Namjoon had spent the past couple of years making a lot of amendments to pack laws and the council hadn’t taken to kindly to all of them.
“ Of course. I just thought that, as I am your mate , perhaps I should accompany you. ” It was a miracle, the way her voice came out, steady . Not at all betraying the nervousness coursing through her veins.
“Jiah…. I’m not sure.” His voice dripped with hesitation and she flinched. Oh, well, no one could blame her for not trying.
“If you don’t want me there, that’s fine.” She said quickly.” I’ll go…”
She turned around, feeling her face burn red as she quickly descended the stairs to the courtyard.
“Jiah wait!!” His voice made her still.
She turned around swiftly.
“I didn’t mean to imply that I did not want you there. I just….Council meetings aren’t short. They tend to go on for hours. Will you be alright?” He asked gently, gaze dropping surreptitiously to her middle.
It took her a minute to understand what he was even talking about.
“I… Oh.” She quickly pressed her palms to her stomach, confused. “ I mean… I may have to be excused a couple of times to relieve myself. I’ve been doing that way more often than usual.” She laughed.
Namjoon’s lips quirked in a hint of a smile and she flushed. Surely, her stern mate didn’t want to hear about her body functions? What was she even doing…
“But, yes. I wouldn’t mind sitting with you. Truly.” She said quickly.
Namjoon nodded.
“Well, then. You can come with me. It’s an hour before sundown… I’ll come fetch you myself.”
“Yes , alpha.” She said brightly, curtsying lightly and immediately feeling like a fool.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“They’re called red feathers …” The healer, a middle aged woman called Selma, opened a small earthenware jar to show her the contents. Jiah peered into the jar, catching sight of a bundle of dried flowers and roots.
“These can help me…?” She asked dubiously and Selma gave a quiet chuckle.
“They help you sleep better and also help you relax. They’re good for you. You won’t feel this anxious if you take them regularly.” She said calmly.
“Oh… alright.” Jiah nodded, glancing carefully at her mother in law who was standing elsewhere, looking through an assortment of salves and tinctures. “ Can I…. is this safe for Namjoon?”
Lady Kim stilled, turning around to glance at her sharply and Jiah stiffened. God, her impulsive mouth. She wasn’t even sure why she said it. Just the whole , helps sleep better , had immediately reminded her of how tired Namjoon had looked.
“I’ve already tried to get him to drink some of it. He refuses.” Lady Kim said tiredly. “ He feels that it may affect his mental faculties”
“Auntie Selma?” A high, soft voice rang through the hut and Jiah glanced up. She went still, catching sight of Jisoo, dressed in red velvet and all of her ornate jewelry.
“Ah… Jisoo…you’re back.” Selma said cheerfully. “ How can I help you child?”
Jisoo stared at her, eyes steady and unreadable.
“I need some wild carrot seeds and ginger roots.” She said softly and Lady Kim scoffed.
“I hope the man you’re taking into your bed is not who I think it is , Jisoo.” She growled. The younger woman merely bowed.
“I’m but a courtesan, my lady. I go where I am asked to.” She said softly.
Lady Kim sighed.
“Then perhaps you should go back home. Now.” She said sharply and jisoo flushed and ugly red.
“Your son wants me to visit him for tea , this evening. I was hoping to meet my lovely lady there…but I hear you no longer stay in his hut.” Jisoo turned to her, tone dripping with acid and Jiah swallowed nervously.
“I… I’m…” She couldn’t quite talk, much less think of something to say.
“Because she is with child.” Lady Kim said sharply, a hint of triumph in her tone. “ Namjoon’s child.”
Jisoo had gone paper white, her face pale and bloodless.
“What?” She whispered.
“It’s true. She carries my son’s heir. You know what that means, Jisoo. It means they are bound, for life. I like you. I respect your courage and admire your talents. You are beautiful and you deserve a mate of your own. Do not pursue my son.” Lady Kim said firmly.
Jisoo didn’t respond for a few seconds.
And then she bowed again .
“Like I said, my lady. I only go where I am called.” She said quietly.
She turned on her heels, stalking away and Jiah could only stare after her, heart pounding a bit at what had just happened. She wasn’t sure why she felt so much disquiet. She’d never had high hopes of fidelity from Namjoon. The entire village knew that Jisoo had been his paramour. But now that she had seen how dismissive the younger girl was of her, she felt the unaccountable urge to fight back. To stake her claim.
“You look pretty upset. Don’t let her bother you. Namjoon will not break his vows.” Lady Kim said quietly and Jiah gave her a soft smile, although her heart still raced. She remembered how pretty the girl had looked in all her brocades and velvets. She stared down at her own murky yellow dress. She couldn’t go to the council meeting, dressed worse than a courtesan. Couldn’t embarrass Namjoon like that.
“ My Lady….” She turned to her mother in law. The older woman hummed, returning to examining the shelves.
“What is it, child?”
“Can we stop at the seamstress’ hut on our way back?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Whatever Namjoon had been expecting, as he knocked on his wife’s private quarters, it hadn’t been this.
He stared , or to be more accurate, gaped at his wife, completely thrown by her appearance.
She looked…. Cheerful.
That was the only word he could think of, taking in the warm yellow and green fabric of her gown, all with an abundance of ribbons and lace. She had also clearly made some effort to tame her hair.
Not a very successfully attempt, considering the dozen strands sticking out of her bun and curling over her bare neck and shoulders …..but an attempt nonetheless.
Which reminded him.
Why was her neck bare?
“I…. have you forgotten… part of your dress…?” He asked awkwardly, gaze trained on the pale, blemish less expanse of skin in front of him. Too much of it was on display he felt.
“Oh?” Jiah twirled about for a second, glancing at herself. “ Not at all, my alpha. This is how it is.”
Namjoon blinked.
“Right… the night is getting colder. Perhaps a shawl?” He suggested tactfully.
Jiah frowned, sticking a hand out of the door as though to the gauge the night air.
“Really? Feels quite warm to me.” She said thoughtfully.
“It may be cold for the baby.” He said quickly and that made her pause. She glanced back down at her tummy and he wondered what she expected to see, every time she did that.
“Perhaps you’re right alpha….let me be back.” She floated back into the hut and he sighed in relief when she reappeared with a white fleece shawl over her shoulders.
“Shall we go ?” She asked quietly and he hesitated before slowly offering her his arm. She gripped it lightly, and they began the short walk to the main village square where the council usually convened.
“You… You’re better adjusted to this place now?” He asked carefully, trying to find the girl he had taken to his bed. The terrified, nervous , trembling young girl.
Jiah didn’t respond at once.
“I… I’ve been drinking some of Selma’s potions. They help.” She said quietly and he frowned.
“Potions? Potions for what?”
“They help with my nerves. I get scared easily…imagine things ….” She trailed off nervously.” I’m very anxious by nature and it gets worse in a new place. With new people.”
Namjoon considered that carefully. That made sense. Perhaps, that was why she had been so odd.
“The potions help?” He asked carefully and she nodded.
“Yes…that and your mother.”
“My mother?”
“She’s very kind to me.”
Namjoon laughed a bit at that. In all the years he has had people talking to him about his mother, the word ‘kind ‘ had never come up.
“ I’m being honest….she has helped me adapt to this place. To see how things are run. I… I don’t want to be a bother. I want to pull my weight. In the pack. To help in any way I can…”
Namjoon felt a sudden unaccountable fondness bloom in his chest at the innocent words.
“ That’s very virtuous of you.” He said seriously and she flushed.
They didn’t say anything else, continuing the rest of the path in companionable silence Namjoon spotted the seven council members gathered around a blazing fire and lightly stepped closer to her.
“You can stay close to me. You don’t have to answer them. If they try to draw you into any controversial topic, just ignore them. I’ll handle it.” He said quickly.
Jiah gave him a wide eyed, nervous look but nodded quickly, fingers moving from his forearm to his palm , linking with his own and gripping tight.
“I’m here. You’re not alone.” She said quickly and it was ridiculous, how the words actually helped him relax just a little.
Taking a deep breath, he led her on to the meeting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Author’s Note : i thinks its about time i accepted that this is a full blown fic and not just a drabble. fuck my life.
Note : Red feathers are actually herbal medicines used as anti depressants. So this is just werewolf au equivalent of therapy.
#namjoon au#namjoon werewolf au#bts werewolf au#alpha namjoon#namjoon smut#bts smut#bts au#bts fics#bts fanfics
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Fanfic Drabble Requests (Rough FAQ I will update as time goes on)
ID: screenshot of Lemongrab 1 from Adventure Time smiling and punching the air with his left fist. ED.
Current status: Requests open
Examples of requests I’ve done so far:
Fluff:
LSP and Lemongrab play minecraft (770 words)
LSP and Lemongrab pick a movie to watch (fluff with minor hurt/comfort elements, 705 words)
Lemongrab and Treetrunks hang out (1600 words)
Hurt/comfort:
Lemongrab experiences fatigue and LSP looks after him (1440 words)
Lemongrab deals with phantom pain and is helped by a lemon subject (hurt/comfort, 1000 words)
Fern and Lemongrab hanging out (mild hurt/comfort 1200 words)
General Rules:
-I work to a word limit of 500 words minimum and 1000 words maximum. (But I may go over if I feel like it this is fun for me)
-Please request a maximum of 1 fic at a time per person! Otherwise Charlie will overheat like a computer and die.
-If requesting use the word please. I don’t want people to just send a list of what they want y’know! It feels a lil rude even if it’s unintentional.
-So I am a Lemongrab/LSP obsessive first and a human second, so I’m gonna limit requests to stuff that features these two (Lemon people also fine though I love those lil creatures). This doesn’t mean you can’t request additional characters like Fern and Marceline, but the blorbos are mandatory.
-I expect some sort of interaction after I post a request - :youtuber voice: please reply or reblog! (asks and dms also fine!) Thank you :)
Will Do!
-Fluff, hurt/comfort, and angst.
-Physical affection like hugs and kisses :)
-Aus! Gonna try my hand at these
-Gore: cannibalisms, amputation, wounds, body horror, basically anything that appears in the show. Though I ask people lean on the lighter side and not request very heavy gore. Plus I will probably shy away from graphic descriptions for fear of overstepping. If people are requesting gore feel free to list any limits you have! Like for example, someone might request a character getting injured and bleeding but not want any organ damage or bone exposure. Bit of a specific example but it’s to illustrate what I mean, though I will be erring on the side of caution. Also see Won’t Do for my personal limits.
-Abusive dynamics: So I’ve written for lg1 and 2 before that’s basically what I mean! Those guys are fucked up but they also fascinate me… I guess in terms of potentially upsetting content, the same rules apply as for gore! Feel free to list any limits.
Won’t Do!
-self inflicted wounds (self harm) and suicide, and character death that doesn’t happen in the show. (like lg1 and 2 being dead is fine but lg3 dying is no)
-Genderbends (this is a Fionna and Cake hate zone sorry)
-Crossovers. I’ve never rlly understood the appeal sorry.
-I view Lemongrab 1 to be a villain and an abuser, so if I get a request like “please write him to not be abusive” I won’t do it because those aspects of his character are intrinsic to who he is! You’d have to change his entire life story, family and personal history, personality and values - basically, you’d have to create a completely different character. One which is, in my opinion, less interesting and a sanitised version of a character who can be used to explore some truly interesting horror themes. This isn’t to say that I don’t think he loves his family, and that he hasn’t been nice to them ever and spent time with them, but if I do get requests for more light hearted stuff I will probably drop hints that he sucks.
-I guess elaborate/long things? I’m working to a 1000 word limit so stuff that has plot aside from just “1 thing happens” won’t fit my set word count.
-Sexual things. This goes without saying but no incest or fetish baiting. Don’t think I won’t notice we can all tell.
-I obviously retain the right to refuse any request!
How to request:
You can reply to this post, or send an ask! Just keep in mind that I will not do anonymous requests (various reasons like it makes me anxious and also people you have blocked can send anons) :)
However, the way I post requests is by making a post and then @ing the requester in a reply (as opposed to responding to an ask*) so if you don’t want your url attached to a request (which is totally fine and I won’t ask for any reasons or judge you!!) - just say and I won’t do that!
*this is bc I’ve done requests in the past for people who ended out to be transmeds and other nastiness, and now the thing I made has their url attached to it :/
#faq#fanfiction#my writing#will update this later and also add more things I do!#for now my plan is to leave this up over the weekend for people to send in reqs and then do them over the course of the week#if that works I'll keep that format up!#also feel free to ask for clarification#1
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Heyo, fellow Inuyasha fans! Happy Friday! This particular blog will serve as a collection of random thoughts I’ve been mulling over lately. Hope you’ll consider giving it a read. By the way, it’ll specifically pertain to the Sessrin ship. If that���s not something that is of interest to you, then no need to read any further. Whatever happens, I wanted to get this out before the sequel. Alrighty, let’s go!
I’m not sure many of us realize just how much fiction sparks public dialogue and shapes culture. There have been countless studies and research done to prove it, therefore this really isn’t up for debate. What the real question here should be is have we taken the time to fully contemplate and assess just how much fictional experiences are able to change or influence our perspective on real, everyday life? The visual arts are just one of many evolutionary adaptations that serve to give us more insight into one another’s mind. If our outlook on fiction contrasts with said insight, then perhaps some re-evaluating is in order.
Powerful works of literature such as 1984 and the beloved Harry Potter series are just two examples. George Orwell’s book contributed strongly to how readers viewed government and politics during that time, and to this day it’s a book that resonates with many. As much as Harry Potter is cherished all across the world, there are religious and academic institutions that condemn it or have even gone so far as to ban it. I may not agree with the extreme measures taken, but it’s fascinating nonetheless to witness the extent to which fiction can move and mobilize people for a cause.
The takeaway is that indicating fiction doesn’t have the power to create change in our everyday lives is misleading to say the least. So how exactly then can fictional stories that are, after all, completely made up affect society in such profound ways? It all lies in the power of the psychology of fiction. According to cognitive psychologist and novelist, Keith Oatley, who’s been researching the psychological effects of fiction for over a decade, he states that engaging with stories about other people can improve empathy and theory of mind. When we identify with these characters’ struggles, we begin to share their frustration for societal problems that plague them. These types of stories tap into our emotions more so than- believe it or not- nonfiction, and thus their effects inspire us and even have the ability to alter our worldviews.
I’ll be returning to that specific topic a bit later, but moving on for now!
It’s safe to say that I speak on behalf of the majority of antis. That being said, I first want to add that we are aware that sessrin shippers claim to agree that there was nothing inherently romantic that took place between Rin and Sesshomaru during their travels together. The thing is we have trouble believing you guys when you time and time again provide contradictory statements to defend your stance.
Voicing things like, “all signs point to Rin” and “it’s been foreshadowed” sends the exact opposite message of what you supposedly stand for and, if anything, confirms that you’ve had romance on your mind long before it would’ve been acceptable to come out with openly. You can’t just go along with what we say when it’s convenient to your argument and then back it up later with “who else but Rin.” How can the relationship you’re imagining be so obvious if they didn’t hint at it for the whole duration of the original series like we agreed upon? Elaborate on how we could’ve possibly come to such wildly different conclusions when we started AND left off with the same views for and throughout the series.
On top of that, making the excuse that we don’t speak for adult!Rin and that she has the right to make her own decisions once she’s old enough is a weak defense. Firstly, because we haven’t even met her. Secondly, because it’s unfair of you to assert that you know what’s best for Rin and then say we’re not allowed to just because it doesn’t align with your beliefs. I get that you feel protective over her character, but do recall that this adult version of her none of us have actually met yet. We have no idea what kind of woman she’s become, what her dreams or aspirations may be, and whether she’s married or even wants to be. I’m not against the idea of her falling in love, I just don’t think it’ll be with Sesshomaru. I guess I’m also a fan of the idea of her following in Kaede’s footsteps, because if anyone can grow up to be an independent, trusted, and wise leader of the community like her it’s Rin.
To make matters worse, way too many of you continue to celebrate the drama cd and profess that it was sweet that Sesshomaru basically promised he’d wait for Rin all while somehow ignoring the glaring grooming implications. Why do you only see what you want to see and fail to acknowledge that actual child grooming scenarios do in fact play out like this in real life? A high percentage of people who have been victims of grooming can attest to this. If Sessrin does go canon, all the sequel succeeded in doing to avoid the direct correlation with grooming was skip over the more questionable and dodgy portions of it. Take out the time jump, however, and you no longer have a loophole to cover up the scary unmistakable truth, which is that Sessrin and grooming are essentially one in the same.
No one case is identical to another so please don’t come to me with your “but how is it grooming if Sesshomaru didn’t manipulate Rin” refutes. Nobody knows what the hell went on during those years between The Final Act and this upcoming sequel. Based on everything exhibited so far- that is if we decide to recognize the drama cd like so many of you choose to do- Sessrin’s dynamic is eerily reminiscent of real life child grooming. Why else do you think a lot of us fans have a huge problem with it? It’s triggering for a reason.
Let’s be honest, Sesshomaru’s supposed love confession could’ve just been the first of many gestures like it. Who really knows, right? According to you shippers, a major shift in their relationship took place sometime during this critical period none of us got to watch unfold. I’m sure you all have explored the various ways this would’ve gone down in fan fiction and through other creative means of expression. Not to spoil the fun, but all I can’t help but wonder about is just how many of those supposed “cute moments” would’ve been as creepy and cringey as that proposal. Hundreds of thousands (possibly millions?!) of fans would undoubtedly agree with me, too. It seems to me this ain’t due to a mere difference of opinion. Taste is one thing, ethics a whole other.
By the way, in case you didn’t know, groomers don’t necessarily need to plan out every single move in order for their behavior to constitute as grooming. What we should be paying attention to instead is the fact that Sesshomaru made a conscious decision to act on his own selfish desire for a young girl who couldn’t have possibly known in that moment the magnitude of what he was asking of her. Why is it that a vulnerable Rin is put in a position that forces her to be the one responsible for making such a big, life-changing decision for the both of them? Yes, Sesshomaru gave her the choice and, yes, she doesn’t have to make it till later, but why on Earth is he coming to her with this well before a child her age is ready and mature enough to handle it? Even if his intentions are good (broadly speaking of course), his what you shippers probably call “innocent acts” are incidentally coercing Rin into reciprocating his feelings. Whether he planned for that or not, he’s at fault. Period.
That’s one way the power imbalance works. A child wants nothing more than to please the adult they look up to and adore, because they’re impressionable like that. Maybe Rin processes this like she’ll want whatever he wants, so that’s what she trains herself to believe- either right then and there or over time. Plus, if you really think about it, why wouldn’t she trust him if in her eyes he’s been nothing but good to her and that’s all she’s ever really known? (Psst! Charm is integral to the manipulative nature of grooming so it’s deceiving AKA manipulation can come off as praise or flattery.) Bottom line is that Rin is too young to have to think about this kind of deep stuff at all, and Sesshomaru shouldn’t have taken advantage of the power he had/has over her to influence a decision she was by no means prepared to hear about much less decide on. Your headcanons seem to imply that she’ll eventually have to choose though, and Idk about you but I rather not push my own fantasy agenda onto a underage girl regardless of how much I want it. Idc if she’s fictional, it wouldn’t feel right so why would I want to see that? My principals couldn’t ever allow for it.
Even if it wasn’t an official proposal, per se, it’s still disturbing to me that so many of you find joy in the thought of a grown adult male essentially waiting for a young girl HE KNEW to become old enough before pursuing her. I know this drama cd ain’t technically canon, y'all, but since this is literally the only source we have that may foreshadow a potential Sessrin to come, and it’s referenced a lot, I figured it still should be called out for exactly what it is- Grooming: 101!!!!
Just as I demonstrated above, fiction has the ability to make even the most inappropriate and uncomfortable situations be viewed in a favorable light when you put the right spin on it. *cough* Lolicon culture, need I say more? *cough* Despite what you may believe, the strategies fiction utilizes to explain themes/concepts can genuinely lead to how we perceive them, and ultimately to how we come to make sense of a similar event presented to us in real life. Especially if we have no prior experience with any of it and have nothing to compare something to, these perceptions can be dangerous yet still persuasive to certain fans- young ones in particular. The more narrative consistency across stories and different mediums, the more likely they’ll influence social beliefs. Minors don’t possess the same capacity as adults to think critically about the content they consume, and if we aren’t more careful about what we put out there then all of us will continue to face serious repercussions.
This is precisely why it’s crucial we persist in our fight against the rabid phenomenon of glorifying young girls in every sexual context imaginable. Just look at what something as seemingly harmless as fiction has the power to do. The scope of fiction is broad and far-reaching, and it’s about time we stop denying that fact and actually do something about it if we have the means to.
The truth of the matter is that we’re in desperate need of proper education and training programs on this issue in our communities. Families need to ensure their children have access to the necessary resources, but it isn’t just on them. ALL of us gotta do our part and ALL of us should be up for the task. It takes a village, right? If we do not properly discuss and address child sexual abuse (CSA) with our children and in public forums, including the internet, then we’re ultimately accepting incidents of CSA should they arise. Consequently, that also translates to indirectly accepting that the predators among us stay untreated and/or unpunished. That’s how the generational and societal aspect of the abuse can continue, and we must do everything in our power to secure our children’s future. Yes, even when it comes to fiction.
If you still somehow don’t think the Sessrin pairing has anything to do with grooming, allow me to break this down for you one more time:
1. If some of your fellow sessrin shippers say that a relationship like this in real life is harmful, then that should be pretty telling in and of itself.
2. Piggybacking off #1: if your only defense to that is “well it’s just fiction,” then you should ask yourself why you can’t ever come up with better reasons. Same goes for history and culture, so please stop using those to justify this relationship. None of the above can or should be applied since it’s already been established that fiction pervades our lives and vice versa.
3. If fellow shippers who are victims of grooming say they are drawn to Sessrin because it allows them in a way to “take back control” from their abuser so that they can better cope with past traumas, then they’re inadvertently admitting that Sessrin does possess qualities associated with the past child sexual abuse they underwent. AKA Sessrin is relatable for its abusive dynamic.
I have to ask by the way, but why do you get so offended when we don’t support your ship anyway? Is it because we interpret it to be controversial and you don’t like your ship getting a bad rap? Is it because it would be insulting to admit that antis actually have a point in it being problematic and you rather double down instead? Or is it because you’re projecting yourself onto Rin and prefer to not go into detail about why that is? Maybe it’s too personal, or maybe it’s because deep down you’re ashamed. Of course that doesn’t mean you’re bad people, but suppressing these kind of negative emotions can’t be healthy for anyone. A little awareness and self-reflection on your part can benefit not just you but all of us in the long run. Cognitive dissonance can suck, but it’s also part of being human.
I recently came across a comment I’d like to share with you. Unfortunately, this is not the first time nor will it be the last I see the likes of it. Anyway, in it a fan stated how embarrassing it must be being an Anti in this fandom when an episode like “Forever with Lord Sesshomaru” exists. Guys, this shipper and all those who liked their post are showing their true colors. Perpetuating and/or anticipating these sexualized images of young girls is a grave issue in both our society and media alike. I think we can all agree on that, or at least I hope so. It’s remarks like these that prove we still got a long way to go in terms of progress, and if we ever hope to effectively reverse some of our backwards way of thinking. So serious question for ya in regard to this: Why is it too much to ask that grooming be portrayed for what it is? Grooming. To clarify, grooming is bad and needs to be painted in a bad light. It’s as simple as that. If only we could all acknowledge it for what it is, we wouldn’t be in this predicament.
Historical accuracy and cultural differences aside, it appears the crux of the matter between Sessrin shippers and Antis is our acceptance and/or denial of fiction’s influence on real life. If we can’t agree on this, then we’ll never agree on anything else. As mentioned earlier, there is more than enough evidence to support the idea that fiction impacts our lives in extraordinary ways. I, for one, believe in the transformative power of stories. I think they do more for us than many of us give them credit for and/or are inclined to admit.
This is partially why I believe that the majority of sessrin folk are missing the point most of the time. All they do is focus on insignificant and irrelevant information that accomplishes nothing but more gaslighting and strawmanning. Whether it be an intentional or unconscious decision, whatever we argue goes right over their head. All they do is throw around deflections and antagonizing remarks that serve no real purpose other than to make Antis out to be the unreasonable and irrational ones. Making connections between our own lives and our stories is a completely natural and normal occurrence. If those particular shippers insist on denying just how interconnected real life and fiction both are, what that tells me is they’re either out of touch with reality or deliberately choose to be.
Just to be clear, I am of the opinion that most if not all antis aren’t real life predators. If they say they aren’t, I honestly take their word for it. Speaking to Sessrin shipper directly: We know it’s not Sesshomaru you want to be but Rin. No, we’re not calling you pedophiles or groomers. None of us think you are using a fictional ship to attract underage fans to be the Rin in your life or anything of the sort. We are well aware that many of you are self-inserting yourself as Rin, so please don’t feel the need to tell us yourself because that would be stating the obvious.
I learned from a few of you since this sequel was announced that the Sessrin relationship isn’t just a ship but an opportunity for you to confront the person who used and abused you. So there’s two issues with this I’d like to raise. (Sorry if I’m repeating myself, but it’s urgent I stress this again!) This is what I have to say:
If fiction does not affect real life or have the ability to normalize anything as you claim to believe, then why does “fixing” what happened to you via your preferred choice of coping associated with these two characters in the first place? Why bring your past abuse into this at all if at the end of the day it’s “just fiction” and nothing more to you but a source of entertainment?
By confessing that you use Sessrin to cope with your past trauma, you therein reveal that Sessrin does in fact resemble an adult-child relationship with a grooming dynamic. So why then would you want other fans to be exposed to a pairing that brings to mind the very abuse you endured? We’re supposed to stop this toxic cycle- NOT find more ways to manifest and relive it, much less subject other fans to it.
You may think that Sessrin doesn’t fit the textbook definition of what child grooming is, but that’s not to say it doesn’t embody it or that it doesn’t at the very least have traces of it that stand out.
“Antis are miserable people who don’t know how to enjoy a good story. It’s just fiction, stop ruining it for other fans!”
Well, no, it’s not just fiction or just a story. Some of you evidently went and proved that yourself, and without my help, by revealing how you relate Sessrin to your own life and apply it to cope with past abuse. Past abuse or not, as far as I can tell we’re all equally invested in these characters. That speaks volumes and just goes to show that fiction touches our lives in long-lasting ways.
I have something I want to say concerning some of who believe that it’s inconsiderate of antis who have been victims of grooming or another form of child abuse to tell other victims who ship Sessrin how they should cope with their trauma. Now as much as I respect the various means victims discover to deal with their painful pasts, there’s always an appropriate time and a place for these things to occur. We must seek out better ways to safely cope with the abuse we lived through (if any) without running the risk of hurting and endangering others.
There are plenty of fans in other fandoms who don’t try to defend their ships going canon, because they’re able to recognize an unhealthy or toxic pairing when they see one and won’t try to justify it. A Sessrin romance simply does not belong on a show geared towards teens, and I really don’t need to go into detail about why we shouldn’t support it, at least canon-wise. Shipping Sessrin is your right, but if you don’t keep it to yourself and your corner of the fandom then you really shouldn’t be surprised by the opposition. All we ask is you respect that their specific dynamic falls under the category of child grooming (or very close) and should be treated as such in public. The world of fiction may be wider than the world we live in, but that doesn’t always mean “anything goes.” In the creative spaces our minds occupy we must still adhere to the same fundamental and moral guidelines we live by in life. There’s nothing wrong with exploring new terrains and experimenting with ideas, but we must also remember that our stories are all about communicating and connecting with people. So let’s please be more mindful of the sort of messages they’re sending.
Besides, this isn’t only about you and what makes you feel safe, it’s about all of us. I don’t know how much more I can stress that really. How can thoughts endanger our children, you ask? Well, it’s not like we’re suggesting that our thoughts can jump out of our tvs, materialize themselves, and place kids under mind control. The forces behind fiction are a lot more complex and nuanced than a “monkey see, monkey do” approach, so don’t waste any more time trying to describe that to us. You’re taking this argument in the wrong direction.
Take the “violent video games breed killers” theory. I’m afraid you’re misconstruing what we’re saying and then taking it quite too literally. Please stop twisting our words, because nobody on our side is saying that just because you play violent video games that you’ll become a violent person. The Sessrin equivalent of that would be if you ship them then you must be a pedophile or turning into one. *sigh* I know you guys are feeling attacked, but I’m afraid your defensive nature is keeping you from thinking straight. Clearly, there are always exceptions (I’d recommend reading up on the Slender Man case), but Antis aren’t saying you’re one of them.
You see, it’s not so much about the content as it is the notion of the content. Kids and teens who are playing these video games have been informed that killing is wrong, because they grew up learning that early on like the rest of us. No sane person would advocate for violence and nonsensical killing in real life. Since they fully understand the severity of the consequences of killing a person in real life, they are able make a clear distinction between the two. When it comes to killing there is hardly any ambiguity. Sadly, that is far from the truth when it comes to sexualizing girls. It should immediately be perceived as wrong leaving no room for interpretation, and yet here we are still putting up with these inaccurate and demeaning female representations.
Most children who have been groomed don’t realize it till years down the road. If they aren’t ever taught the telltale signs to properly labeling grooming situations, how do you expect them to make sense of and relate to a fictional version? Let’s think of about it from a child’s perspective. Yes, this includes teens who rely pretty heavily on adult guidance and the content we put out there for them. Put yourself in their shoes for a moment and picture that you’ve never had child grooming explained to you (because that’s just the reality for so many unfortunately). Wouldn’t you say it’s possible for them to deduce that what they see on their screens is how they come to discern something in real life, especially if they have little to no experience with it? Perceived realism is plausible, y'all.
What it comes down to in the end is that the ideas and emotions we cultivate behind these stories leave an impression on others. Impressions are capable of influencing the way we see the world, which in turn affects us and beyond just our imagination. The way I look at it, stories contribute to how and why we normalize certain beliefs and trends. If fiction reflects real life like most of us tend to agree, then wouldn’t you say Sessrin is a (in)direct result of this world’s tendency to place young girls in overly sexual or romantic environments? Where do you think fiction draws its inspiration from? Sure, some of it originates from our imagination, but most of what drives us to create these stories is the real world and the people who live in it.
Fiction is meant to mirror reality, but it’s ridiculous to suggest that it’s only a one-way street. That fiction in no way, shape, or form influences our reality? Or that it only works the other way around? With all due respect, that’s simply not true. No productive discourse can be had if we choose to ignore the truth and don’t come together (at least halfway) to tackle the real issues at hand.
Okay, I think I’ll leave it off there! Thanks so much for reading. I expect this to be my last blog on any topic regarding Inuyasha in the near future. As much as I’ve looked forward to answering all of your asks and writing all the blogs I have over these past almost 5 months, I think it’s best if I spend some time away for now. With the sequel fast approaching, I’m doing what I always do: hoping for the best and preparing for the worst. I’ve met some amazing people along the way, that’s for sure. And who knows, maybe you’ll see me active in the tags sooner than we think. Until then, it’s been an absolute pleasure! Enjoy the sequel, all of you. 💜
#inuyasha#hanyo no yashahime#anti sessrin#it's been real y'all#catch ya on the flipside#(which I hope is in a promising sequel 🤞)
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Hello! First time sending you an ask so I'm a little nervous (haha *nervously sweats*) but I think you're the right person to send this to. I'm a big AU trash so whenever I join a fandom I'll come up with at least one AU focused in some way on my fav character (Me falling for Shin was just destined I guess)
So, please consider? Doll Shin AU where he died instead of Midori?? Kind of death game participant Midori AU as well.
I imagine that doll Shin would be super creepy in his own way because he'll be kind of a distorted version of AI Shin. Always smiling and making you forget that he's actually a doll and reality heavily crashing down on you when he stops smiling and all that stuff
I don't really know how Midori would react tho (I assume that he'll be at least a little uncomfortable since he didn't know at all that a Shin doll was even made. But I don't know)
Answering this quickly because I don’t want you to be nervous of me, Anon! I am simply one random wordy YTTD fan on the Internet. :)
Switching up Shin and Sou’s roles sounds fascinating! Sou abused Shin when they were both alive, so turning Shin into a Doll Floor Master while Sou remains a participant would flip that power dynamic. How would they react to seeing each other like this? Would Shin be thrilled at the chance to wield power over Sou? Would his kind, timid personality still sometimes crack through his villainous demeanor? Would Participant Sou still know the words to take Floor Master Shin down a peg, and put him in his place? Would Sara even want to encourage Sou to say cruel things to Floor Master Shin, since Shin is their enemy in this AU?
That could lead to some interesting moral dilemmas! At least, that would be the angle I’d be most interested in.
I don’t think I could resist a meta-joke where Villainous Doll Shin introduces the group to his Floor while trying to be grandly theatrical, and then Participant Sou comments that he could have done a better job. Doll Shin gets flustered and defensive like, “I’m trying my best! Why do you always do this to me?” And Sou is like, “Your decorations are so tacky, Oh my god.”
How do you think Shin would die in this AU? I started imagining an elaborate scenario where Shin happens to be there with Sou and Alice at the scene of the crime. Sou and Alice get into a fight, but Shin gets in the way—maybe trying to defend Sou?—and Alice accidentally kills Shin instead. That way, Alice could still go to prison for murder in this AU. I enjoy the melodrama of that kind of story.
But there are other ways you could go about it. Like, you could keep it as simple as “Sou killed Shin.” Or…Maybe Shin learned too much about Asu-Naro while he was at Sou’s house, going into rooms he shouldn’t have, and so Asu-Naro had to send agents to kill Shin, whether Sou wanted them to or not. Depending on the scenario, Sou could have all kinds of complex emotions about the death of his friend/favorite plaything. He could feel guilt about getting an innocent boy involved; he could feel relieved that he didn’t die himself; he could miss hurting Shin and that feeling of cruel power, or he could even regret being cruel to the boy who gave him such kind smiles. I suppose it depends how complex you want Sou to be, haha. He would definitely be scary even as a participant!
My mind jumped to Participant Sou taking Kanna under his wing instead of Shin, and he is much worse to her! Sou could even forge a cruel message on Kugie’s smartphone to break Kanna’s heart. Could this lead to Doll Shin sympathizing with the girl, and even rebelling to try to protect her? Would that be possible with his doll programming? We know that Rio Laizer was capable of kindness and compassion, but those emotions were stripped from him. I’d be curious what kinds of emotions Doll Shin could express! Especially since his true self is such an emotional, empathetic person. Maybe Floor Master Doll Shin would find it easier to express his righteous anger through violence! And evil laughter!
I generally see fan artists do more with role swap AUs. It’s a premise that lends itself to playing with characters’ aesthetics. Writers have to work through a lot of details to determine how the fun aesthetic-switcheroo even makes sense in the first place, haha. Switching Shin and Sou’s roles sounds like a premise that’s right up my alley; thanks for sharing it with me.
#yttd#your turn to die#kimi ga shine#sou hiyori#your turn to die spoilers#shin tsukimi#sou and midori#asks#aus#headcanons#mine#floor masters#dolls#shin sou roleswap au
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⇨ wall to wall (02)
↳ 1.2k preview. read the first part here.
:: female reader x jhs
:: smut, porn star! au
:: ~18k
:: sex work, insecurity, jealousy, slut shaming/objectification, boyfriend!jimin, filmed role played scenario that includes: d/s dynamics - dom!hoseok, anal sex, sex toys, erotic massages, humiliation, porn dirty talk, squirting, lots of cum (and oil!)
It physically pains you to admit it but Seokjin’s worrying isn’t unfounded. Your career is stagnant, your projects predictable and boring. You’re not bad at your job, but you don’t stand out amidst the sea of pretty girls hoping to make a name for themselves.
There’s no guarantee that Director Ryu’s new project will be as successful as the first. You’re no stranger to false hopes; there’s a chance that Seokjin’s wishful thinking might never amount to anything. Even so, you want to give it a shot. Not trying feels too much like giving up and giving up is not an option you’re willing to consider, not when you’ve already put so much on the line.
.
.
.
.
They’ve really gone all out this time, you muse as you cast a cursory glance at your surroundings. A small, electric waterfall fountain sits in the far right corner and crimson colored scented candles are dispersed all around the elaborate massage parlor set-up, dousing the room in a cosy, amber glow. It’s a surprising sight because porn sets are famous for never focusing on the details. Viewers are here for the sex, not the generic backdrop of a rented room or hotel suite.
Director Ryu vehemently protests.
“That’s precisely what sets apart my works from your average pornography film. I want the viewer to be completely immersed in the movie they’re watching. Porn is too constricting and underwhelming a word. What I’m creating is a feast for the eyes, one that leaves a lasting impression after consumption.”
“Ah... Yes.” You try (and fail) to sound impressed.
“People want to believe the sex is real, even if it’s just for an hour.” He sighs deeply, sounding pained, like explicating such a simple fact isn’t worthy of his time. “They need the escape and it’s our job to make it happen. A few extra candles might not make a colossal difference at first glance. But that’s where you’re wrong! It’s never been about the candles. It’s about the ambiance! The visual experience!”
It’s a pity the new budget doesn’t extend to your wardrobe, you remark internally as your gaze drops to observe the stylists’ pick of the day.
For the upcoming scene, you’ve been instructed to squeeze into a tight, baby pink shirt that stretches obscenely over your bust like something straight out of a frat boy’s wet dream. Inwardly, you congratulate yourself for hitting the gym religiously because your clothes—or lack thereof—put everything on display. The cotton material of your shirt is so thin, you’re surprised the stitches haven’t popped out, while the denim bottoms you sport are so tiny that you could hardly qualify them as shorts. Although—you suppose that there isn’t any use debating over semantics. It’s not as if they’ll stay on long enough for it to matter.
The scenario that you’ll be acting out today is pretty straight-forward. You stop by the parlor to cash in a voucher gifted by a generous and thoughtful friend. Hoseok, who plays the role of an erotic masseuse, gives you a deep tissue body massage worthy of a five star review on Yelp.
Director Ryu is extremely proud of the pitch. His spectacles glint as he pushes them up the bridge of his long nose.
“We’re gonna call it My Bare Lady. Haha, get it?” He gloats. “It’ll be different from our last shoot - the both of you aren’t supposed to be acquainted with each other at all. In fact, there won’t be any romance. We’re aiming for something new because as artists, it’s our duty to reinvent ourselves every day. Complacency is the enemy of creativity.”
At the mention of Hoseok, your gaze flits over in his direction.
His brown hair, two shades lighter than the last time you’d run into him, is swept to the side, giving him a professional and tidy appearance. He’s swapped his workout attire for beige scrub pants and a matching shirt. The color compliments the glow of his tan and the cut of the uniform is flattering to his figure. Diretor Ryu’s speech continues despite your wavering focus.
“—visual stimulation. That’s why one shouldn’t underestimate the proper use of props. A believable setting sets the tone for the rest of the scene. If you don’t believe the role you’ve been given, then why should the audience?”
“Mhm,” you nod here and there but you’ve long stopped paying attention to his one-sided speech.
Your eyes linger on Hoseok’s arms and the dimples that appear every time he laughs. You’re not the only one who stares. A small group of admirers flock to him like bees swarming around a rare and exotic flower.
You’d noticed it before but today confirms it; Hoseok’s presence is riveting. It’s not the first time today your gaze has strayed his way. More than once, you find your eyes drawn to him like a moth to a flame only to quickly avert your gaze whenever your eyes meet. Each time, the right side of his mouth quirks into a half-smile, the beginning of a question forming on his lips.
It’s embarrassing to be caught red-handed gawking but, in your defense, you aren’t the only one who ogles him—and many of them are far less discreet than you try to be, some gazes curious, others downright lecherous.
It bothers you. What exactly do you and everyone else find so fascinating about his character? He’s good-looking, sure—but you’re no stranger to handsome and pretty co-stars with nicely shaped dicks. You can’t put a finger on what sets him apart from the rest.
The gaffer comes over and momentarily interrupts the flow of Director Ryu’s monologue with a personal inquiry. Thank God. You use the opportunity to slip away, grateful that someone has put an end to your misery. As thankful as you are to the director for the career opportunity, you could do without his long-winded speeches that never seem to end.
“Hey, Hoseok.”
His smile widens, the corners dimpling the moment he spots you. “Hey! It’s been a while. Who would’ve thought we’d get to work again so soon, huh?”
“I didn’t think our last movie would do so well, honestly.”
Without its success, who knows what kind of movie you’d be participating in right now? Another re-hashed version of ‘BABYSITTER GETS CREAMED’ type scenario, most probably.
“I guess that’s a testament to your acting skills, right?”
You smile back, sheepish but nevertheless pleased. It always feels nice to be complimented, especially on days like today when you’re feeling less confident than usual.
“You changed up your hair.”
“Yeah! I thought I needed a change.” He threads his fingers through his locks self-consciously. “It looks fine, right?”
“It does!” you agree with an enthusiastic nod.
Jimin, who had insisted to be present on set today, hovers on the edge of your periphery. In the back of your mind you know he means well—that his presence is meant to be a source of support and security. On a typical day, you’re relieved that someone you trust is close by in case the situation escalates. While you’ve never had any horrific experiences, there have been the occasional uncomfortable encounters behind the scenes. Thankfully, Seokjin or Jimin have always stepped in before whichever entitled asshat could get too handsy.
But for the first time, his presence doesn’t comfort you the way it usually does.
.
.
dun dun dun cue the porn and the drama 🤪
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So I weirdly actually did a thing I said I was going to do.
Here’s a handy dandy list of Nozze productions to avoid if you, like me, love Cherubino, and believe he is a precious sunflower that needs to be protected at all costs.
After watching about 20 productions of this opera (though not all of them in full) I have compiled the following list.
Truncated because it got pretty long:
*Some of what is written here is subjective so I apologize if I end up disparaging a production you’ve seen and enjoyed. But I tried to stay objective and focus on the specific details that made the production safe or not for Cherubino.
**If you’re morbidly curious and want to know what, exactly, goes on in the first two listed here, perhaps message me first to ask before seeking them out to see for yourself, to prepare.
Salzburg 2006
Do not watch this one.
It’s weird, disturbing, and borderline sadistic. I can appreciate odd productions if they look at operas in new ways, try a different take, or magnify certain elements to bring in a fresh perspective. This production does none of that. It’s just weirdly disturbing for no apparent or forgivable reasons. I’ve spent a decent amount of time searching for answers on this one but none of the critiques I’ve found have any clue what this is supposed to be, so whatever the director was trying to say, their attempts failed miserably and left an atrocity in their wake. EVERYONE in this damn thing (except Cherubino) is a freaking asshole, the set is minimalist to the point of being irrelevant and confusing, and there’s this weird, winged Cherubino look-alike going around controlling people like puppets and making them do weird dance moves during their numbers. Obviously this director did not know how to embrace the concept that some people can just stand still while they’re talking or singing. Also, people hardly ever make eye contact and it’s unnerving, like they’re all zombies. There are a lot of other small, weird details that just keep building to make this thing a terrible production overall. The worst thing about it is poor sweet Cherubino. He’s an innocent, delicate flower that’s abused by everyone in unbearable ways. I don’t even want to go into it. I beseech you not to watch this because it’s honestly kind of traumatizing. Just pretend this one doesn’t exist and you’ll be okay.
Redeeming factors: absolutely none. Cherubino is adorable and too pure for this world but that just makes the whole thing ten times worse because of all the terrible, terrible things that happen to him.
Dutch National Opera 2016
Proceed with caution for this one. It’s a shame because the production itself is pretty decent, and Susanna and the Contessa are great. The set is interesting—versatile, rotating, lots of doors that are utilized in interesting ways. It’s mostly portraying the somewhat-empty house that the cast is moving into it (at least that’s what I gathered). Reasons to avoid: Figaro is an asshole, the Count is downright gross, and Cherubino is treated terribly by almost everyone (except the Contessa and Susanna, bless them). The only part I like is the Act 2 scene between the three of them where they are all very sweet to each other and Cherubino is delighted to dress up and the kindness he’s shown here by the ladies makes up for some of the other things that happen. The worst stuff I won’t get into; I can’t talk about it without getting super upset. In general, Cherubino is terrorized by the Count on multiple occasions (physically threatened, punched, and thrown around), Figaro is super mean to him, and he doesn’t really get any closure at the end except that Barbarina dotes on him and he clearly loves her so we can imagine that he’ll be okay. It is a joy to watch him being super awkward, dreamy, and cheeky; I just wish he’d been given a better production.
My recommendation for this one, if you do want to watch it, is skip “Non piu andrai” and go right to Act II, although there’s one aspect that’s hard to explain without seeing that. For now let’s just say: there’s a reason Cherubino is wearing a beanie at the top of the second act, and it’s Figaro’s fault. You don’t need to know what else happens. (My rec: skip forward like ten minutes after the last recit, then seek backwards until you see Susanna sitting on a crate holding a remote which is the start of Act II. That way you don’t have to see the scene even in fast-motion.) At any rate please don’t watch that scene. I want to find the person who staged it and punch them. The rest is bearable; just be warned, it’s not fun or pretty.
Honesty hour: Figaro is mean enough too that I want Susanna and Rosina to run off together and just marry each other because their chemistry here is amazing. And take Cherubino with them and keep him safe and loved forever.
Redeeming factors: Interesting set, great leading ladies, insanely adorable Cherubino, and also it’s insinuated that the Contessa actually leaves Almaviva at the end; she even threatens him with his own hunting rifle and everyone else just watches in morbid fascination. She does put the gun down at the last second, but she doesn’t go to him after, so maybe he gets kicked out. We can only hope.
Salzburg 2015
Tbh this one’s just weird and probably not worth your time anyway. The set looks like the wall of the house was cut off so we can see all the rooms inside, upstairs and downstairs, at the same time. It’s an interesting device showing how all of the scenes interact, but it’s no utilized very well. There’s so much business in multiple rooms at one time that it’s hard to focus on the people who are talking and singing at the moment. The cast is mediocre. We get Pisaroni as the Count which should have been worthwhile but isn’t because of the weirdness of the production. It’s honestly hard to tell what or who anyone is supposed to be here. Plus there’s blatant abuse from the Count to the Contessa and it’s hard to watch especially because I’m more used to a huggable Luca and this doesn’t do him justice imo. Additionally, I typically stan gay Basilio, but here he’s got a thing for Cherubino, and Cherubino is super not into it so it just comes across as gross. Mostly Cherubino is just pushed to the sidelines (the Count literally locks him into the closet for most of the end of the first act). So it really minimizes his character in general and is disappointing to Cherubino fans.
Redeeming factors: Susanna is really cute, Figaro is nice, “Non piu andrai” is not sadistic, but this is mostly because everyone leaves the room when he starts singing it so he’s just talking to himself which is weird anyway. At least there is nothing Unspeakable although I do wish I could wipe this Basilio out of my brain. Also Margarita Gritskova as Cherubino being dapper and sweet and I’d say Pisaroni but I’m not a fan of him being the mean old Count when he should be playing those sweet Rossini baritone roles.
Salzburg 1995
Susan Graham is Cherubino and she’s super adorable, although she’s taller than almost everyone else which is awkward and amusing. However everyone is VERY mean to Cherubino. Even Susanna. He gets thrown around a lot which is just sad to watch. The production overall is kind of unremarkable and the picture/sound quality isn’t great either. Watchable but just be prepared for an annoying amount of meanness from characters who should be a lot nicer.
Redeeming factors: Susan Graham is amazing and adorable. That’s pretty much it. Someone tell me what is up with Salzburg and this opera, seriously.
Royal Opera House 2006
This Cherubino is a precious duckling who gets thrown around by everyone, especially Figaro, which is super sad. Honestly so many of these are ruining the character of Figaro for me. This one is watchable and decent except for Mean Figaro. The set is elaborate and detailed but sometimes the background action with the supers gets distracting. The rest of the cast is alright but I wish they would be nicer to Cherubino who hasn’t done one single thing to warrant the abuse. I recommend avoiding it for those reasons but it’s not as bad as some of the others.
Redeeming factors: Intricate, pretty set, Dorothea Röschmann being an adorable Contessa, and Cherubino being gawky and cute.
To balance out the depressingness here are some Nozzes that I highly recommend!
Garsington 2017
My absolute favorite, a pure delight. Though there are no big names here, the entire cast is amazing. The set is glorious, detailed without being distracting, super versatile to fit all the scenes, and the final act is actually in a garden and it’s just so PRETTY. The chemistry between Figaro and Susanna is lovely; they obviously adore each other and are a great team throughout all their plots. The Count is reasonably dislikable without being detestable, so the apology at the end is actually kind of believable (though it’s hard to pull off in general). He and the Contessa actually have an interesting dynamic so you can kind of see how they might make things work in the end (some of their arguments are more banter-y than mean and they actually make out briefly in “Susanna, or via, sortite” as if they’re kind of turned on by each other’s fury). The supporting cast is great too, full of personality and mischief. The staging is lighthearted, genuine, and intricate. THIS is what a Nozze should be! Cherubino is adorable, cheeky, super loveable, a SHAMELESS flirt, and best of all everyone loves him (except the Count obviously). Figaro is really nice to him too and “Non piu andrai” is really cute because he and Susanna are teasing him the entire time but it NEVER gets mean and it’s honestly so refreshing. Highly recommend this one!
Met 1998
Featuring my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE CHERUBINO, the incomparable Susanne Mentzer, as well as my favorite Contessa ever, Renèe Fleming. I could talk about those two forever. They are both individually fantastic and their collaboration is amazing. I died, to be honest. Also features an amazing Susanna courtesy of Cecilia Bartoli and a simply adorable Danielle de Niesse as Barbarina. Figaro is pretty mean to Cherubino especially during “Non piu andrai” (seriously what is it with directors and this number) but it’s nothing compared to so many others so it’s watchable especially because Mentzer is fantastic and she steals the entire scene without even saying anything because she’s amazing. Her Cherubino is just the sweetest, sassiest, most adorable, energetic, and expressive Cherubino ever to bless the operatic stage. She’s exactly what Cherubino should be in every way and the production fully supports it. Watching the entire Cherubino-Susanna-Contessa scene in Act 2 is one of my favorite things in the world. The production itself is classic, detailed and true to the period, busy without being distracting, and the rest of the cast is good too.
Liege 2018
A very cute production featuring a super sweet Figaro who teases Cherubino but is not mean to him. Cherubino is sassy and endearing and very much the flirt with every lady in sight, and is pretty popular among them. The rest of the cast is good too and we get a particularly sassy Susanna (whose chemistry with the Contessa is lovely). The set is simple but very pretty. Another lighthearted, sweet, and genuine portrayal that stays true to the heart of this opera.
Glyndebourne 1973
A classic; lots of familiar names, lush period set/costumes, and staging that’s simple but effective. Featuring the insanely adorable Frederica von Stade as Cherubino. Her smile melts my heart every time. A mostly nice Figaro and great leading ladies.
Obviously there are way more productions out there, and I’ve watched more than this, but these are the ones that to me are most noteworthy from one end of the scale or the other.
This list may get longer as I watch more, but I think I’m going to take a break from Nozze for a little bit (or more likely just re-watch the Garsington one and Mentzer’s Cherubino over and over again).
#Le nozze di Figaro#the marriage of figaro#Cherubino#opera#opera tag#opera reviews#beware the Salzburg 2006#if that's your only takeaway i've probably succeeded#petition to slap whoever came up with that one#anyway i hope you find this helpful#Cherubino is precious and must be protected at all costs#monotonous-minutia critiques
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Ramblings on Grey Rainbow – Ep.3
Time jump? And whose place is this? – Oh, okay… Porsche’s house
YES! Live your life! Parents need to stop trying to live vicariously through their children.
Awwww cute kiddos
What’s with this ominous music?? I sense a villain *squints*
That’s right; stand up for yourself Porsche! It’s his life, dad!
“If two people are meant to be together, no matter how far apart they are, fate will eventually bring them back unto the same path.”
You didn’t pack pants, Porsche!!
The elephants are so beautiful ;;
Nuer in this dark grey V-neck… the FLAVOR!
You're welcome ;-)
That is such a clever way to discuss homosexuality with children.
“Love, whenever and wherever it happens, is always beautiful.”
Reunited and feels so good~~~~ (you were obligated to sing that)
Nuer and his souvenirs lol
It’s interesting that Porsche keeps gifting Nuer watches
He has such a fascination with time; especially when he writes his notes – I wonder why
“Raise your arms up!” – That was hella smooth, Nuer
“1.20 mins – I miss you… I miss you… I miss you… I miss you a hundred times more than you ever imagine.” OMG ;;;w;;;
N: I was cute [when I was their age] P: Who wanted to know that? – In conclusion, Porsche is a savage lmao
Uhhh... those wooden statues are very phallic
Let them sleep in the same room!!!
WHY DO Y’ALL REFUSE TO LOCK DOORS????!
Nuer's family is so lovely ;;
Ummm... was that a dream? I don’t like it, not one bit
Awww the paper airplane :’)
Can you please respect the single community?
“Love without obstacles is not true love.”
This is cute and all, but like the cold night air and mosquitoes tho
This ominous music again
Lawyer Porsche, come through!
I was right, Sam is an a**hole
Yes! Break the heteronormative stereotypes – there are men who cook!
I hope Nuer’s dad means that
Khampun knows what’s up lol
That’s right! Let aunty know, Khampun
Nuer noooooo... please don’t cry ;;;w;;;
Nuer’s family is AMAZING! The understanding and acceptance ;;
“No bride price” XDDDD
The difference between their families is staggering
Calm down, Nuer – Omg, mom is an angel :’)
Khampun is such a mood lol
Oh, we MEASURING now? Come through centimeters!!!
Oh gosh... this parents’ meeting...
BE GONE, SAM!!!
Just like that, Porsche? O_O
Dad is probably gonna... yep, there we go
HOW IS THIS HER FAULT???!
YES! Let him wallow in his ignorance, pretense and hypocrisy!!!
Don’t give up, Nuer :’(((
Note: I may elaborate further if I decide to do a full review, but I really appreciate how realistically everything has been portrayed so far, especially the dynamics between Porsche, Nuer and their families. We are able to see everyone’s perspective because not all families are as accepting and understanding as Nuer’s. As unfortunate as it is, most families are like Porsche’s and it’s important to have that representation so discourse can take place.
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Rated -ℜ- for Roleplaying
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Come closer if you dare,
Call me Imp, a multidimensional being who has made it her mission to travel through various dimensions in order to post her humble request on this website. Nah… just kidding, but you may still call me Imp ;) I am a lady in her twenties who has a penchant for roleplaying, writing, and drawing. You know, the Holy Trinity. I am a huge nerd and aesthetic lover boy - plain and simple. One of my main passions is video-games, illustrating, comics, live-action films, series and anime/cartoon shows, something I grew up and eventually fell in love with.
A friend recommended me to post an ad on this website and so I eventually figured, why not give it a shot? It couldn’t be any worse than receiving no messages at all. I’ve been roleplaying for a few years now and gradually gathered a good amount of experience throughout the years, but it's always fun to meet and learn something new. Name: Imp Age: 27 years Experience: 11 years Preferences: 1:1 Roleplaying Partner: Should be at least [18+], but I rather much prefer my counterpart to be 21 years or older EMAIL: [email protected] I am a very creative sort of individual with hundreds of ideas constantly swarming through in my head. And I am very spontaneous too, so I can always adjust to a new setting, depending on how good and compelling the concept is.
Inspirations come from various sources and origins, be it a fandom (an already existing universe) or an original storyline. Please read through these paragraphs before you decide to contact me! It's important to avoid any misunderstanding later! And I would less likely respond to a message with the title ‘Hey, wanna rp?’, since I hadn’t had any good experiences with these said messages. Thank you. °°°·.°·..·°¯°·._.· ☥ ·._.·°¯°·.·° .·°°° °°°·.°·..·°¯°·._.· ☥ ·._.·°¯°·.·° .·°°° Communication: It’s certainly chill. You can talk to me about whatever occupies your mind since I am very open and always happy to listen to others. I also tend to be chatty, sharing a meme every now and to loosen up the mood. If you consider choosing me as your roleplaying partner, be sure to maintain a certain consistency. I have nothing against going on a longer break or even a hiatus, but the whole `ghosting stick´ is something I have no patience for. So if you’re unsure of upholding a stable, long term partnership, feel free to skim past this ad. Plotting: Also very important to note! I am fairly quick when it comes to building new characters, concepts, premises, storylines, backstories, etc… This means there is certain flexibility available which allows me to adjust more often than not. Even though this is a hobby, I am still extremely passionate about good storytelling and interesting character arcs. I hope to meet someone who is just as enthusiastic and willing to put in the same amount of effort as I am. If it’s only me who's pulling all the weight, I will lose interest fast, just to get it out there. Aside from that, I love going a little crazy with the possibilities and push things to their absolute limits. Of course within the boundaries of the given setting. Pairing & Romance: Okay, right off the bat, I am a hopeless romantic through and through. I enjoy good and strong chemistry between characters just as much as the next, and this will be no exception. I prefer the good ol’ MxF pairing because I have more experience with this. But I also like playing a FxF dynamic or MxM. Everyone is welcome! When it comes to pairing itself, I want to make sure our creations are compatible, for I hate forcing characters into a romantic relationship for the sake of progression. A natural flow is what I am aiming for. ;) Mature? Yes, very mature: Adult and taboo topics are absolute. There’s no way around it because, in my stories, it’s a running theme. The adult world is not easy to handle, but it’s interesting to explore. That includes violence, cursing, shocking content, and all that dark stuff. My limits are few, safe for a couple of minor pet peeves that I have, I am pretty much open to some experimentation. When it comes to action-heavy scenes (be it an intimate situation between two characters or something on a cataclysmic scale), I won’t fade to black since I am not a huge fan of censoring. However, I will not force or push my partner into something they are not comfortable with. If you want to know the extent to how far I am willing to go, what sort of content or how detailed my writing will be, you can ask me directly. As for smut or lemons, whatever you call it, it will never be the focus of any of my roleplays, but I enjoy a good erotic scene with a lot of tension (if they are good). Boundaries: Not a big fan of things like pedophilia, necrophilia, scat, bestiality, and those dreaded ‘futas’. Inspirations and interests: There’s a pretty broad spectrum that I deem interesting and inspirational. From fallen angels and demon/monster hunters, mages, criminal masterminds, cybernetically enhanced characters to futuristic dystopian settings, ancient kingdoms who have fallen against the test of time. All of it causes my heart to skip a beat. For original content, I’ll just give a brief list of bullet points of the general themes that fall in line with my interests. Writing: My texts are lengthy, detailed, and elaborate. Third-person is usually my preferred way of playing my character unless there’s a special case where an exception can be made. Word count usually fluctuates, though I have a standard form of 400-500+ words per response. It also highly depends on the given situation. I don’t want to set anything in stone… just to give you a basic idea of what you’re in for. I also expect my partner to have an at least adequate, if not decent grasp on basic grammar and punctuation. Doubling: Yes, absolutely! If you are prone to doubling, chances are I might accept you as my partner straight away! Although I have nothing against the simple form of roleplaying, doubling is something I’ve done since my first time joining. Characters: Very character-driven with the main focus being on interaction. I take my time writing characters and love nothing more than well-structured sheets that illustrate the vision of its creator. Of course, there’s no need to write 10-20 pages worth of character information, but I wouldn’t want to limit you either. As for the depiction of the given character, I won’t be as presumptuous as to tell you what sort of medium you can and cannot use. Face claims such as photos of real models, illustrations, 3D models, drawings or descriptions are all okay. As long as it gets its point across, I am happy. Aversions: A few minor things that irritate me, or let's say, aren’t really my style are one-liners, low effort responses and out of character behaviors in canon characters. We all have different takes on characters, which is totally fine by me since I basically do the same. Though if the character acts and behaves unlike their personality dictates, it will break the immersion. I hope to stay true to my own words when saying this. If it happens on my side, just let me know! Another pet peeve of mine is that one plot that has been done time and time again…. and I’ve grown quite jaded towards it, which is ‘supernaturals trying to fit into human society’ thing… I mean, I’m not opposed to borrowing from this idea, but for me, it grew old pretty fast. Speaking from experience. ;( Passione: My wish is to find a partner whom I can have a good time with and develop some chemistry. After all it is a fun hobby. We both should have fun with what we’re writing. Brainstorming among other things is one of my favorite things to do. To see how things unfold and how the characters react to the given situation is the highlight of any story. °°°·.°·..·°¯°·._.· ☥ ·._.·°¯°·.·° .·°°° °°°·.°·..·°¯°·._.· ☥ ·._.·°¯°·.·° .·°°° FANDOM: I love roleplaying fandoms just as much as I have a blast with building something original universes. Worldbuilding is my preferred cup of tea… but if we opt for something more fandom inspired, I highly welcome in on expanding on the given universe and add some original lore too!
Hellsing: Haven’t done that one before and I am curious as to how things play out, especially in such a dark and mystifying universe like Hellsing. There’s a lot of subject matter that we can delve into, plus I am a big fan of powerful vampire characters!
Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure: I would love you for this. No, seriously, I would. This fandom has sucked me into a downward spiral and there’s no possible chance of escaping this inescapable void. The absolute insanity of this franchise had me hooked from the second I laid eyes on it and I would be forever ecstatic if you’d message me on behalf of roleplaying Jojo. I have plenty of ideas for this one, just you wait.
Full Metal Alchemist: One of my favorite mangas and animes ever made. Recently I’ve begun rewatching FMA Brotherhood and felt a small hint of nostalgia swelling inside my blackened heart. I’d be open to play it, though it is not one of my top cravings at the moment.
Justice League / Young Justice / Justice League Dark: Huge DC fan, though I much prefer the animations and comics over the live-action cinematic. Let's just say, I like the expansive and dynamic set of possibilities and deep, well-written cast. For instance Hellblazer Constantine or Raven.
Bayonetta: Need I say more? Let’s dance boys!
APH Hetalia: That includes the 2P version ;)
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Supernatural: From angels to demons, from gods to monsters, I’ve seen it all and I absolutely love it. There can be any sort of creature or being involved, ranging from vampires to sirens to elves, you have it. However, I’ve never done something quite relating to angelic beings and their offspring before. I’ve read up on Nephilim and angels and found it rather fascinating, and it’s a different approach from the usual vampire vs werewolf cliche.
Crime and intrigue: I never stray too far from the supernatural path, but hell, there’s nothing better than some good old gritty mafia inspired stories with a complex cast of characters and a solid storyline.
Sci-fi and urban fantasy: So this could be basically anything from genetically engineered superhuman (superheroes / - villains) with a dark take on the human psyche, dismantling the idea of heroism and villainy. Or a world where mankind began their interstellar journey to colonize neighboring planets, galaxies before transcending their own humanity by merging themselves with deadly technology. I have a few plans for this…
Historical and mysterious setting: So one of my favorite eras is the Victorian time period, 30s - 40s - 80s, Renaissance or Ancient times during the rise of the Egyptian / Roman / Sumerian Empire. During these times, a dark discovery was made by man, learning that they were not alone in this world. In fact, they weren’t even the supreme race that destined themselves to dominate the world, for another race of humanoids have lied dormant deep beneath the earth, slumbering through the millennia only to be re-awakened by a cataclysmic event. These ancient humanoids are gods among men, superior in every way imaginable, and they have made it their mission to reclaim their right to rule. But their nature is not what most people think it is…
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If you’re still here and haven’t fallen asleep reading through my loooong paragraphs, then I would like to thank you for bearing with me this far. I am looking forward to your messages.
Have a wonderful day ;)
#indie rp#indie roleplay#independent roleplay#oc rp#multiple paragraph#para#semipara#long term#email#spn rp#smut rp#dc rp#aou rp#submission
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BabyGirl 7.0
NOTES:
♥ this is based on a concept i received a few weeks ago and ppl asked that i made a story with it. ♥ i planned 3-4 long parts but i think it’ll be 8-10 short parts ♥ 3.4k. fluff. ♥ there may be smut but i doubt it and IF it happens it wont be as explicit as my other smut works. ♥ i didn’t proofread and if you read my stuff you know i never do because im a lazy ass. ♥ idk how i feel about this chapter? only his POV btw, was easier this way. please tell me if youre still interested in this story? i feel like its dying slowly lol ♥ if you have any questions please dont hesitate.
♥ PART 1 // PART 2 // PART 3 // PART 4 // PART 5 // PART 6
7.0 NEW MUSIC AND IMPORTANT QUESTIONS
HIM
Maybe It's time you go home.
Her words resonated in my head over and over as I drove back to my house and I couldn't help but wonder if I was really going to kiss her out of pity. I've been flooded with so many intense feelings in the past days that it was sometimes hard to unscramble. I barely understood myself, so I couldn't expect her to understand me at all.
The only thing I was sure of, is that I loved Chelsea. If I could have created the perfect child for me, I wouldn't even have came close to that perfection. She was turning me into a different man, a better one I believed, and I was so proud to be her dad it almost hurt. Still, if I wanted to be honest with myself, I shat my pants just thinking about her reaction to finding out I was her father. I could live easily with what the rest of the world would think, but if Chelsea didn't want me as a dad, I had no idea how I would take it.
I threw my keys on the counter and locked the door behind me, taking my coat off and leaving it on the couch, along with my beanie and my scarf. I walked slowly to the kitchen and opened my fridge, staring way too long at the inside of it. I was not exactly sure of what I wanted, and it made me think of her. I also was not really sure what I wanted when it came to my ex girlfriend. Did I want her to be my ex ex girlfriend? Or was I attracted to her simply because of the vestige of feelings that were once really fucking strong?
I couldn't blame her for moving away when I decided to kiss her but when I brushed my thumb on her bottom lip, I realized that even if I was not sure of the feelings we truly had for each other, I was well aware of how my body vibrated when she was near and it brought an other question in my head. Was it simply lust? Would we finally succumb to the temptation in weeks from now only to find out that it was only physical attraction? That thought made me grimace and I bent down to quickly grab a beer.
The last thing she told me was to leave and I felt like it ended things very badly. I didn't want to hurt her, and my instinct really told me to kiss her. My head, however, kept reminding me of all the wrongs she did me and it made me sigh.
I grabbed my phone and turned it on again. I had only brought it in case of an emergency but I was not going to let myself be distracted by it when I was spending time with my daughter. It turned on slowly and I sighed for the second time when all the notifications popped up. One made me frown though and I opened it, only to see an amazing picture of Chelsea on my shoulders with fireworks in the background. It was a great photo, and even if I knew it was her job as a photographer, I was still impressed by the quality of the picture. She hadn't written anything but the date and I quickly changed the background of my phone for this photo.
'Thank you for the picture Xx' i typed quickly before hitting 'send'.
I stared at the words I sent, my thumb still hovering over the keyboard of my phone, wondering if I should type anything else.
'I didn't want to hurt you. I'm happy we spent the day together,'
I debated whether or not I should try to comfort her, but no matter what I would send her couldn't be the completely truth. I couldn't tell her it wasn't a pity kiss I wanted to give her because I had no idea if it was. I couldn't tell her I wanted to try again with her since I was not even sure of my feelings. All I could do was tell her what I knew and was a hundred percent sure of.
I waited way too long for her answer, standing motionless in the middle of my kitchen, and finally gave up. I sighed, closing my eyes and sliding my phone on the isle next to me, and finally walked to my room, deciding that I needed a shower.
She hadn't texted me in a few days and although I was well aware that I had to wait for her to show signs of life, I was getting impatient. It's only on the morning of the third day without any news from her or my daughter that I got a text message from her.
'Niall I need you.'
I felt my heart jump in my chest, questioning the signification of her words but a few seconds later, I got an other text from her, clearing my doubts.
'I have to work today and I have no one to babysit Chelsea."
Her first text was not declaring her love for me in a short text message, she just needed someone to take care of our daughter while she was at work. I thought I would feel relieved but what invaded my whole body seemed more like disappointment. I shook my head slightly and finally, a smile appeared on my lips. Not only was I going to spend the whole day with my daughter but now I knew that my ex girlfriend trusted me enough to let me stay with Chelsea by myself.
'I'm on my way."
It only took me a few seconds to grab a coat and jump in my car and when she opened the door to let me in, she quickly left it open and continued getting ready.
"Thank you so much, Niall!" she expressed from an other room before coming back. "They called me last minute."
She had traded her sweatpants for a skirt and did all she could not to look into my eyes. I could understand that the last time we saw each other was awkward and emotional but I felt awful thinking things would be cold between us from now on.
"A photoshoot?" I asked, closing the door behind me and taking my shoes off.
"Oh, I wish, no." she admitted with a sigh, rolling her eyes as she ran around, trying to put her earrings on at the same time. "Being a photographer is not what I would call 'profitable', especially when you're a freelancer. I had to take a second job to pay the bills, you know how it is."
I kept quiet because I had no idea what it was. I did work my ass off all the time, doing something I adored, but not knowing if i'll have enough money to eat next week isn't something that ever happened to me.
I couldn't pretend it didn't break my heart to find out she was struggling so much and i was tempted to propose her a few solutions that I thought about. I decided against it, remembering we weren't on the best terms at the moment, but took a mental note to have a discussion with her later.
"I work in a hotel, at the restaurant during the day, and at the bar in the evening." she told me, raising her nose in a grimace. "I know, not really glamorous, but some clients pay very well."
I pressed my lips together, keeping my comments to myself, and let my eyes roam around.
"Where's Chelsea?"
"She's getting ready. She's very excited to spend the day with you. Be prepared, your day is going to be extremely long."
With a chuckle, she looked up and our eyes met, making her smile falter but mine grow. She breathed in and sighed as I took a step closer, keeping my eyes into hers.
"I'm sorry for the other day." i apologized in a very low tone. "I didn't want to hurt you. I never want to hurt you."
Without thinking, I brought my hand to her cheek and she held her breath as my fingertips brushed against her skin. I could feel my heart throb all over my body until she took a step back and looked away, bending down to grab a toy and throw it in the hall.
"It's okay Niall." she let out, grabbing her purse and opening it to look for something in it, once again not looking at me. "We both made mistakes and now it's over, let's move on."
I didn't know if she wanted to move on from this uncomfortable situation between us, or if she wanted us to give up on the feelings we weren't sure we had, but I didn't like it. I didn't really have time to ask her to elaborate.
"Okay so I'm gonna leave you a key of the apartment, but I thought you'd want to babysit her at your place. Either way I don't mind. Don't turn off you phone, leave the sound on, and if you have any problem, just call Louis, he will know what to do."
I nodded as she kept talking, grabbing her coat and putting it on. I couldn't help but think it was too cold outside for the outfit she wore but I kept quiet.
"Chelsea! Baby! I'm leaving!" she yelled loud enough for our daughter to hear before lowering her tone. "No junk food, no chocolate or trust me she'll make you regret it. Fruits, yogurt, ice cream, it's all good. She hates fish, too, and don't let her boss you around."
I had no idea how I was supposed to remember all of this but I just nodded, trying to engrave her recommendations in my brain, although I was pretty sure I was going to forget half of them.
"I'll text you when I'm done so you can tell me where you are and I'll just pick Chelsea up, okay?" she didn't wait for my answer and handed me a key. "There, lock behind you will you?"
Without thinking, she moved closer and I held my breath but she quickly stopped herself and turned around just as Chelsea entered the room. The dynamic they had together and that intense connection was something that fascinated me, especially since it seemed like they didn't even see it. She bent down and Chelsea let herself fall in her arms. They hugged for a while, and I noticed she was whispering something in her ear. My daughter nodded a few times and pulled away as they smiled to each other before moving closer again and brushing their noses against each other's. it made me chuckle low and my ex girlfriend finally got up, caressing her face gently.
"I really need to go, good luck, Niall."
She pressed her hand gently on my shoulder and it took me by surprise, accelerating my heartbeats for a few seconds but when I heard the door close behind her, I turned to Chelsea and sent her a smile, raising my eyebrows.
"Happy to spend the day with me?"
"Are you gonna show me where you live?" she asked with a frown, ignoring my question.
"Mmhm, if you want to!"
She clapped her hands a few times, a large smile on her lips, and grabbed her pink backpack, throwing it over her shoulders
"I'm ready!"
"Woa, Chels, you may need a coat and something to put on your head too, don't you think?"
She giggled but nodded as I started searching for her stuff but when I looked back at her, she was already dressing up. She struggled a bit but I bent down to help her with the sleeves of her coat before grabbing the beanie and pulling it on her head, over her eyes. She laughed more but stayed that way until I moved the beanie up slightly, allowing her to see. I took the scarf and put it around her neck and finally, I tilted my head, asking her if she was ready. She nodded frenetically and I laughed, getting back up and grabbing the bag her mother prepared.
I locked and we walked to my car. I was nervous and excited but I didn't know if I was going to succeed this test, because that's exactly how it felt like : a test. One that I was making myself try to pass, at least.
I made sure her seat belt was tied correctly and couldn't help but glance back at her through the mirror as we drove in silence. When we walked in my house, I turned the lights on and her eyes roamed all over the living room. Her lips parted and after a few seconds, she turned to me and grinned.
"This is where you live?" I nodded and she turned again to look at my Christmas tree. "Why don't you use lights of all colors?"
She quickly turned to me and frowned as I chuckled.
"I don't know, do you prefer multicolored lights?" I asked, glancing at the soft white lights in my tree.
Without even thinking, she nodded firmly and I bent down again, unzipping her coat and helping her getting undressed.
"I'll remember that, then."
I put our coats away and we both sat on the couch. She put her backpack between her legs and quickly opened it, placing books, movies and a few toys between us.
"What do you want to do today, Chelsea?"
"You're gonna read me stories, and we will watch movies, and we will play with my favorite barbies, and we will eat, too."
"Are you hungry?"
She nodded and I told her to leave her stuff on the couch and to follow me to the kitchen. I ended up making grilled cheese for both of us and we ate quickly in silence until she just looked up at me to stare. I sent her a smile and raised my eyebrows, watching her take a sip of her glass of milk before putting it back on the table, now looking at me with a milk mustache. I tried to keep my laughter inside and just licked my lips.
"Is everything okay, Chelsea?"
Without answering my question, she tilted her head. I grabbed my water bottle and she waited until I was literally drinking from it to talk again.
"Are you my new daddy?"
I choked on my water, trying not to spill it everywhere, and coughed a few time.
"What?"
"I saw you and mommy kissing the other day after the fireworks."
She was probably half asleep and had imagined it but who could blame her? I remembered holding her mom's face so close to mine that our lips brushed. I remembered being so close to kiss her that my heartbeats were erratic. I remembered feeling her warm breath against my lips. These thoughts made me shiver and I cleared my throat, trying to find a good answer. We hadn't kissed, but my daughter couldn't understand the complexity of the relationship her mother and I were in.
"Would you want me to be your new daddy, Chelsea?"
The answer was important for me, but she just shrugged and looked down at her plate. I waited a few seconds and she finally looked up.
"I want my daddy to come back."
I felt my heart jump so high in my chest that I had to swallow, as if it went close to escape by my throat. I could read sadness in her eyes and I felt extremely bad. She was only four and was already suffering from not having a father in her life.
"Where do you think your dad is, Chels?"
She tilted her head and squinted, lost in her thoughts.
"I think he's busy being a princess."
This time, I was glad I wasn't drinking water because I would have definitely choked on it for good.
"A princess?"
"Yes." she nodded. "He can't be here with me because he has to take care of a whooooole kingdom."
"That makes sense, but why a princess? Why not a king or a prince?"
"Princesses have more fun, and they can wear nice dresses like the ones mommy buys for me." she explained, making my lips curl. "I'm sure my daddy prefers to be a princess."
Her mind was intriguing but also incredible, and that made me realize I had never really been close to a little girl. No one close to me had a daughter I really interacted with, and the fact that Chelsea was my daughter suddenly made me extremely proud.
"No matter where your father is, Chelsea, he loves you, he cares for you, and he's thinking about you. And I know he would give anything to be with you, if he could."
She nodded and sent me a warm smile that made me hold my breath. I desperately wanted to tell her it was me, that there was nothing I wanted more than to be her father, but I kept it inside and brought our plates to the counter.
"You remember that shirt you wear to bed?" I asked her as we walked back to the living room. "Would you like to hear some of their songs?"
Her eyes opened wide and she looked up at me, her chin raised up.
"Do you think my daddy likes that band?"
"No doubt."
I put my spotify on the television to make sure the music would invade the room and when I turned around, Chelsea was sitting on the couch. She looked extremely tiny on my gigantic couch and it made me chuckle. She leaned her head on it to look at the ceiling as I started the first song.
I started with "Can't get you outta my mind" and sat next to her, leaning my head exactly the way she was. She waited about a minute after the song was over and I turned my head to look at her.
"What did you think?"
She stared at me and frowned slightly.
"I want to hear an other one."
Her attitude made me laugh and I started "She's a sensation". I closed my eyes and when the song was over, I let the next one play on random and felt my heart twist when "I won't let it happen" started. For some reason, the lyrics really hit me and I tried to keep my feelings in, turning to Chelsea again.
"So?"
"I like them." she just expressed, nodding slowly.
"Yea, me too."
My phone beeped and I grabbed it, to check the notifications.
'I heard you were babysitting. Freddie and I are coming over!'
I grimaced at Louis' message but decided to ask Chelsea what she wanted. I was not against seeing Louis, but at the same time, it was going on so well and easily with my daughter that I was not sure I really needed him.
"Louis and Freddie want to come over, what do you say?"
"YESSSSS!!!"
I watched her throw her tiny arms in the air and it made me laugh as I answered Louis' message. I was ready to give her anything she wanted, and although I knew it could be dangerous, seeing Chelsea happy was pretty much my only motivation for... everything.
"Maybe we could order a pizza for dinner?" I proposed. "What do you prefer on yours?"
"Cheese and mushrooms!"
"Mushrooms?" I asked with a chuckle. "Really?"
She nodded quickly and I decided to put on a movie she had brought while I would order. She sat better on the couch to watch what I thought was 'Open Season" and I walked to my room, sitting on it as I ordered pizza with my phone. As soon as I hung up, my phone beeped again.
'Order pizza, Neil. We're hungry!'
His message made me laugh and I shook my head, only sending him the emoji of a thumb up. For the first time since I found out Chelsea was my daughter, I felt at peace. I knew I would have to tell her who I really was at some point, but I didn't want to focus on that. I wanted to focus on spending time with her, getting to know her, and allowing her to get to know me too. I wanted to be a part of her life and it seemed like we got off to a good start, and I didn't want it to end.
#niall horan#niall horan fluff#niall horan story#niall horan writing#niall horan fanfic#niall horan fan fiction#niall horan fan fic#niall horan daddy#niall#niall fluff#niall story#niall writing#niall fanfic#niall fan fic#niall fanfiction#daddy!niall#my fanfics#ehh idk man is it remotely ok?
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About LLSHP AU (Afterword)
[Brief note about School Term] [other LLSHP AU stuff] [YohaMaRuby concept arts] [ChikaYouRiko concept arts] [KanaDiaMari concept arts] [Hogwarts Staff]
[FFN link] [Pixiv Link] [Translated to Chinese by plin2290]
I’m just so pleased and happy to have made it! I have so many existing incomplete stories that it’s astounding for me to actually complete a multi-chapter story. Once again, I’d like to say a huge THANK YOU!! to my readers for staying with me to the end, providing me feedback and expressing interest, motivating and inspiring me enough to reach this point.
The following is really just about my rambling, about my thoughts, about the planning process and my decisions, so do keep reading if you’re interested in the makings of this story. I just feel like sharing (aka: blah blah blah) since, again, I actually friggin completed a story omg (´;Д;`)
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First of all, let’s go way back to near the end of October 2016, not long after LLS Season 1 ended. Yes this is so long ago lmao. After drawing several canon-related fanarts and writing short blips to satiate my thirst, I decided to create a complete whole AU so I can fantasize more XD I ended up picking the Harry Potter verse because, come on, it’s always fun trying to Sort your favorite characters and think about their abilities and whatnot.
Ideas started to whirl and initial sketches began. There’s an old post explaining why I Sort the girls into their respective Houses. That’s also when extra details were pondered over, the why and the pros in doing so. You should know by this point that I’m a complete useless 3rd Years trash, but as I brainstorm more, I realize that their story is more suitable to be a prequel, something that supplements a main story. And so, what should the main story be about? What kind of story do I want to present? Who would be the perfect main character/narrator for this?
Yoshiko. In canon, she’s already associated with (black) magic and, as a First-Year and Muggleborn, she would be perfect for a reader to immerse into this fascinating new world of magic through her perspective. As an old post says, I fudged up the School Term and age during the initial stage and didn’t realize until everything’s all finalized, that’s why I had to keep it as it is XD;;;;
Anyway, at this point, I’ve already decided Yoshiko to be a Horcrux, with the antagonist of this story to be Yohane, and how the last few chapters are going to play out. Everything else, even the other characters’ backgrounds are all further elaborated and refined based off of this central plot. On a side note, how sexy is Aikyan’s solo in the 3rd Live, I mean, the white and black wing I could only think about Yoshiko/Yohane DX
Ahem, I’ve always found Yoshiko’s character fascinating, that there’s a Yohane side of her even though, really, she’s Yoshiko (a good girl). The Chamber of Secrets and the Half-Blood Prince are the main source of inspiration for this particular idea, but of course HP fans might notice many elements from the original story used or modified in my story. I’m also a strong believer that the Patronus Charm can do more than just warding off Dementors or Lethifolds (and Obscurus), hence its significance in this story, especially later chapters.
Therefore, each girl’s Patronus was tentatively decided at this early stage, with 1 or 2 possibilities. After this, I then thought of what ships should this story present. As much as I did not want romance/ships be The Major Point, I have to acknowledge that ships are what people go for in a story, myself included. I understand shipping might turn people away from even trying a story, that’s why I kept it secret for the first few chapters before confirming it on tumblr (where the chapters were first uploaded). I was just testing the waters, to see if people are interested in the story enough to keep reading even if the ships aren’t their preferences.
Back to planning stage - as a multi-shipper, I did not want to set in stone right off the bat what the ships are either. And thus I continued expanding on ideas and see where things would go, keeping most of the initial interactions and important moments intact. This is why there are times it might seem there are multiple pairings even though nothing was specified (cough wee kanadia, youriko etc (。・ ω<)ゞてへぺろ♡). Not to mention, as the main character, Yoshiko will always have moments with each of the 8 girls. I remember joking in an old post that, if this were a gal-game, there are various routes to this story, from the default path to those you have to unlock via certain conditions XDDD
Naturally, members of the 1st-year trio and Guilty Kiss get more screen time with Yoshiko. Then, as a fellow Slytherin and part of the tsurime trio, Dia does too. Not to mention Season1’s anime ED shows You & Angel together, You gets special moments too. Chika is Aqours’ leader who first accepted Yoshiko into the group as datenshi, so I tried to show that as much as I could given the circumstances in the story. And so, this leaves poor orca on the side lol. But yeah, YoshiMaru, YoshiRiko, YoshiRuby, so many possibilities! However, as more details get finalized, such as Yoshiko’s childhood, her Shiira-KANSU! Patronus and about the Augurey, YoshiMaru just happened. Things seem to click into place with their love as the focal point and I was able to keep expanding the story. First puppy love, innocent and pure. A dream that grew to become reality. Could other ships have worked? Yes, but then that would’ve given this story a different direction and it wouldn’t have been LLSHP AU – Yoshiko Tsushima and the Fallen Angel anymore. As I developed YoshiMaru more and more, I was very satisfied with my choice.
On a side note, I confirm Yoshiko did have a crush on You at first (and Hanamaru had a crush on Kanan) xD it’s mostly just physical attraction in a “the-senpai-I-admire” kind of way, and it soon morphs to strong friendship as this story progresses. I don’t know if this was obvious at all but that’s why these two girls always have a soft spot for Gryffindor Baka#2 and Baka #3 xD!!!
On the other hand, I was not expecting DiaRiko to form. Yes, it was my guilty ship but I didn’t intend for them to be a couple in this story, just close friends/confidantes. In canon, they’re already the straight man of their respective year trios (most of the time anyway, I’m looking at you ponkotsu penguin). Yet, given their respective pasts and personalities, they became intimately close and found solace with each other, and that kind of relationship is what I tried to show to the readers, especially through the Carbonado Interlude. They’re not predestined to fall in love but they did and found happiness. Out of the four ships, I was most worried about DiaRiko since it’s a rareship unlike the other three. That’s why I keep saying how pleased I am that it ended up being well-received by fans ;;A;;
ChikaYou came to be as I finalize the 2ndYears’ background and Riko’s part, while KanaMari’s story is set aside for the prequel and thus not given much spotlight in the main story (and also due POV effect). In spite of how much I adore ChikaYou, it’s also not shown much because of what happened in the story but also because I wanted to present their dynamic as a duo and CYR bond with Ruby (since that’s how Yoshiko perceives them most of the time anyway).
Ruby, my widdle cinnamon roll baby, is left unpaired for a reason. I want to show that platonic/friendship love is just as wonderful and powerful. There’s a saying ‘lovers come and go, but friends are for life’, and that’s exactly what Yoshiko and Hanamaru meant for Ruby, and vice versa. Now, while I’m on this, I have a confession about Ruby’s fate. After the concept arts were drawn and uploaded, I was finalizing the details of the three Arcs before I toss the first chapter onto tumblr. The end of ch19 is definitely one of the biggest climax of the story - Ruby ended up being Yohane’s target instead of Dia. Originally, uh, yeah, Ruby is supposed to die because her wounds were too much. Regular healing spells do not work on sectumsempra, only a special counter-Curse could reverse the effects. I tried very hard to find a way around it to save her. I don’t want my baby to die, any of them really, and she still have so much ahead of her. Fortunately, I was able to save her through Yoshiko/Yohane which, in turn, saved this raven-haired girl as well. I was able to continue working backwards on finalizing the Arcs and individual chapters with a peaceful state of mind.
‘Yoshiko’, as in the one who’s been narrating the story from ch1-20, still died in a way, but at least I was able to change the story from Bad End to True End (?). True End is the ch21 I uploaded. Bad End route would have Ruby dead, Yoshiko gone and ch21 would turn out completely different. A Happy End would be Yoshiko the Narrator miraculously alive and the others not having scars or still recovering, but I just find that too unrealistic. I’ve minimized the, uh, damage enough as it is, given the circumstances. J.K. Rowling did go on a killing spree in Book7 but come on, with a psychotic maniac like Voldemort and all those magical spells, you can easily kill people. You don’t need Avada Kedavra to kill someone, a sudden Diffindo or Reducto is enough. I’ve chosen my sacrifice and one is too many already. And speaking of sacrifice, let me talk a bit about Riko and why she was the ‘first victim’. Omoi yo Hitotsu ni Nare. Even though this story was outlined even before the First Live, this song already stands out to me from the anime, a song where the 8 of them sang in Riko’s absence but her spirit is still with them. And so, I sort of portrayed that the way it is in this story. Even though Riko didn’t get any lines from ch12 onward until ch20, her role remains significant and is the pivotal point for the remainder of Arc2 and Arc3. In terms of the plot, I’ve followed my outline quite closely. All the core points remained unchanged as I write out the chapters, though how I write a chapter (ie the wording, the extra little details, and actual professor dialogues instead of just narration) did change as I go along, influenced by more of the official content. Facts about characters that are only revealed in Season2 or other media such as SIF etc were not incorporated into this story (for example, Kanan being afraid of ghosts and height). As I mentioned in an older post about wands, I would have chosen phoenix feather for Ruby’s wand core had I known about the Duo-Trio results. The Kazuno sisters would have been incorporated into the story alas, back then, very little was known about Saint Snow in Season1 of the anime. Yes… season2 was finished and, like, a total of 15 live performances have happened between the creation and the completion of this story LOL Back to the plot. Seven is said to be a magical number in the HP verse and that’s why each Arc has 7 chapters. Arc 1 is the Intro, Arc 2 is the turning point, Arc 3 is the climax and the resolution. Sounds easy and straightforward so I thought I would’ve finished the story within a year. Well. It ended up almost taking two years lmao. Obligations IRL aside, new ideas, more AUs, more fanarts etc also make sticking to the update schedule difficult. It’s the worst when it comes to writer’s block – you have the outlines, you know what’s supposed to happen in a chapter, yet the words just aren’t flowing and you’re stuck. Thankfully, with you lovely readers giving the feedback and encouragement I need, I made it over each bump on the road to get to the finale. Hanamaru wrote most of this story, yes. Each chapter titles with exception of Ruby’s interlude and ch18-19 also showed up in ch21. The title of the ‘book’ is supposed to be revealed in the Epilogue but, since I had to upload it onto Fanfiction.Net, I can’t just call it LLSHP AU so I had to reveal “Yoshiko Tsushima and the Fallen Angel” right away. Back then I called this a temporary title because I did think about giving this story an alternate title, since she didn’t write the interludes, ch21 and the epilogue. However, at the end of the day, this still suits the story best. After all, the individual titles for ch21 and the epilogue make up the story’s title.
“Yoshiko has always known that she isn't normal like everyone else. Surely, she would master everything about magic at Hogwarts, and become the amazing fallen angel she's meant to be. Little did she know, her school year would be more than eventful as she makes great friends, uncovers secrets, and learns what it truly means to be Yohane.” - this is the summary I put on Fanfiction.Net. It speaks from both Yoshiko the Narrator’s perspective, and Yoshiko from the Epilogue’s perspective. It probably sounds confusing but I hope you understand what I mean. So, what’s next? I’ve invested a lot in this world of LLSHP AU already and there are still so many more possibilities, especially with the rather open ending both ch21 and the epilogue presents, so I’m definitely not done with this AU! Since I have the memory of a goldfish, I don’t know if I’ve already mentioned this but the prequel will be told mostly in Mari’s POV. It will have occasional Dia and Kanan POVs too (because I’m a shameless 3yrs-oshi and writer privilege); Rather than taking forever to write and cramping the scenes into a massive interlude chapters, I’ve decided to split it in shorter chapters - this will roughly be a 12-part story that took place before the main story, showcasing segments of the kanadiamari’s first 3 years at Hogwarts.
This prequel is… relatively normal and lighter compared to the main story, meaning it’s more school-oriented and more slice-of-life episodes for the most part (at least, that’s the outline), and much more Professor cameos. There will be more N-card girls to be showcased as well, such as kanadiamari’s Housemates and Quidditch teammates. Overall, it’ll be shiny °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖° There will not be a full sequel to the main story. Instead, there will be blips/drabbles about events that happen after the main story, as teased in the Epilogue - the TriWizard Tournament for one XD And, unlike the main story, the ideas for blips in this sequel-timeline are more vague, so I’ll be able to incorporate new content into it (as in, from official content 2017 onward such as proper characterization of Saint Snow).
There are plans for omake/filler fun blips as well - little incidents that happened throughout the main story or, rather, ‘excerpts’ that Hanamaru wrote but didn’t make it to the final version of her book. The first Halloween, more scenes with the Professors, birthdays and so on.
There are also plans for character-exclusive blips as well, similar to an Interlude. For example, DiaRiko’s ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) cough cough.
My tentative plan is to keep going with the prequel, and maybe every few chapter or so I’d write a sequel-timeline blip. I’ll see how my muse and inspiration is in the future, I’m already extremely satisfied that I finished the main story XD And I do want to work on some of my other existing AUs (ie Animus AU and Mafia AU just because I’ve already invested time in creating the concept arts and so I don’t want them to sink into oblivion…) or who knows, there might be new AUs. I mean, pretty much every new SIF set is enough to inspire a brand new AU please allow me a moment to giggle like the trash I am over the DiaRiko UR set *pterodactyl screech*
AHEM. Another thing is illustration/artworks. Since most of my time was spent on writing, there are much fewer artworks than I would’ve liked for this story. I think I mentioned this somewhere that I’d love to have an individual cover art for each chapter alas, no time at all DX I’d like to have at least one illustration per chapter too but OTL I can only pick one and so for this AU I chose writing over drawing. Cry.
Anyway, I’ve rambled long enough and I think I’ve talked about everything I want to get off my chest. If you have any questions/feedback, go ahead and fire’em at me, since I’m now able to answer anything without fear of spoilers now XD (unless your question is about the prequel or things that happen in the sequel-timeline)
Thanks for reading the whole thing and, ofc, staying with me until the end of this story!
#LLSHP AU#athyra rambles#really just athyra blabbering#this thing is almost 3k#at least it's shorter than the Patronus Ramble lmao#but yeah I think that's everything#all that's left are the fun times with the prequel and blips#makings-of#I feel accomplished to have come this far#it really has been an amazing journey#yeah I think that's everything I want to say#it's not like this is the end-end...#prequel and other stuff
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