#that you allow yourself to be vulnerable in front of someone you don't even know that well
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meowsticmarvels Ā· 3 months ago
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i think i mightve talked abt this a bit in my longpost about how insane phi as a character is to me but yknow what i really wanna point out? all the nonary game shit she has to go through happens in really quick succession to her - she doesn't really get a proper "break" in between VLR and ZTD for her mentally. junpei and akane at least have about a year between the two, and sigma has 45 years (not that either of those situations were particularly good either though, looking at how sigma and junpei especially turned out, and sigma spent years WORKING on the AB game, just not participating in it). but for phi? she has a matter of DAYS in between the two. the time sigma spends she spends in cold sleep, so mentally to her, her consciousness goes from the events of VLR's phi end to DCOM almost instantly. dcom only ends up lasting for about 5 days, and even then the prologue states that phi/sigma/akane spent most of it worrying about radical-6 and the future + the flashback with diana shows phi is just so Tired after everything after just that. and then the decision game happens. my point is just that i cannot imagine being in a death game like that (not to mention everyone had radical-6, so she went from a body that Did have it to one that didn't, which i can imagine would probably a pretty weird experience considering one of its symptoms is messing up your perception of time. and also she was on the moon.), spending 5 days like god how did the apocalypse start i can't let it happen this time and then being in Another death game that is much more gruesome and violent. not to mention both of them in a way HAD to happen because of her (2074 nonary game bc it needed to train sigma and phi's SHIFTing abilities to a good enough degree and decision game one of the reasons was to ensure she and delta were born). in summary: i would fucking die at that point if i was phi dealing with that All At Once. in the span of a few days. and with the memories of my + others' deaths. what the fuck
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riki-dazed Ā· 8 months ago
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You get into a bad argument with your boyfriend, Riki. The evening proceeds to end in a very unexpected way.
NSFW smut Ā· block & don't read if you're uncomfortable Ā· toxicity, cursing, pure angsty, smutty filth with a touch of softness at the end,, call it a heart-wrenching rollercoaster, if you will Ā· wc Ā· 1774 Ā· requested
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"You always find something about me to complain about," You cried, throwing your hands in the air as you stormed about Riki's tension-filled room in frustration, looking for your belongings.
"You're being dramatic," He snapped back as his eyes watched you from the door way, his gaze piercing. "Just say you regret ever becoming my girlfriend,"
Something within you snapped after Riki got home in a bad mood and decided to take out his frustrations on you. You couldn't control your emotions, considering it wasn't the first time he had done that. The both of you have already had to deal with a couple of arguments in the short time since you started dating, which was leading you to believe that you just simply weren't compatible for him in that sense. If you were to be completely honest with yourself, you were worried since the very beginning of the relationship. You and Riki spent many years as very close friends, you loved him dearly. More than any other friend. The thought of a relationship ruining things between the two of you scared you to death, though, Riki reassured you everything would be okay.
Until it wasn't.
His facial expression changed as he noticed you starting to pile clothes into one of your bags, his heart began to sink. He wanted to stop you but he didn't know how to approach the situation, he had never seen you that angry and upset in all of the years he had known you. The longer he watched you irritably pack your belongings, the tighter the feeling within his chest grew. The realization was starting to eat at him. He knew he messed up again, big time.
He watched you silence as your tears didn't stop flowing.
"Good fucking job for ruining this, Riki, I told you countless times how worried I was for us at the start,"
"Can you just stop and fucking talk to me," His voice began to tremble, his hands found their way into his hair and tugged at the strands.
"What's there to talk about? I do regret becoming your girlfriend!"
Although Riki was an emotional person, he was never great at expressing those said emotions. You kept your eyes off him, though, knowing how he affects you when he's upset. You cared for him so deeply, you'd cross oceans if you had to in order to comfort your boy, and by the sound of his voice, you could just tell his nonchalant composure was nowhere to be found anymore.
His tall frame stopped you in your tracks, his hands found their way to your shoulders as he towered over you. For someone so big compared to your frame, his voice sounded small.
"You don't mean that,"
"Get off me," You almost yelled, your eyes stayed focused on the floor, not daring to look at his face. Your body twisted and turned as it tried to get out of his grasp.
After not being able to break out of his hold, your tear-filled eyes finally looked up at Riki's. His bottom lip was quivering, the tears in his eyes threatening to spill. You had never seen his face look like that. Before you could process anything, Riki pulled you into his chest. His arms clung around you tightly, he was so afraid to let you go. Your arms stayed swinging by your sides as you stood against his warm chest, letting out silent cries as your tears continued to pour. Your eyes screwed shut.
Riki couldn't hold his emotions back after scenes of a life without you in it flashed throughout his mind. That was the first time he allowed himself to be so incredibly vulnerable in front of anyone, ever. Even you.
"You don't mean that," Riki repeated, he was crying into the crook of your neck. The sounds of his sniffles only made your tears fall harder. You raised your arms slightly, grasping the sides of his shirt within your hands.
"Y/n," His voice broke the sorrowful, long silence. He lifted his head from where it was settled beside your neck, and wiped at your tears with his thumbs. "Let me show you how much you mean to me,"
Your eyes drifted from his gaze, unsure of how to reply to him, "Riki.."
"Please," He pleaded, attaching his quivering, pillowy lips to one of your tear-stained cheeks.
One thing lead to another, and before you knew it, you were suddenly sat on the edge of Riki's bed. Your face was still struck by pain, you couldn't even force the frown off it. He stood in front of you, pulling his hoodie over his head. Your gaze lifted, eyes scanning him carefully as he revealed his breathtakingly toned body, you were sure it was sculpted by the gods. Silence continued to engulf the tension-filled room as your hands got to work on Riki's belt, one of his hands simultaneously pushed damp strands of hair out of your face. You shuffled your body backwards across the soft sheets, your eyes not leaving his. He climbed onto the bed after stepping out of his jeans, he followed after you and propped his body above yours.
Riki's woeful gaze burned into yours for what felt like an eternity.. Before his lips met yours in a fervent hunger. He kissed you like he had never kissed you before. Your tear-stained cheeks met his ones as he deepened the kiss, your mouth being entirely engulfed by his. Your breaths mingled, hot and heavy as you let his tongue fight against yours. The kiss spoke volumes without words, it expressed every single pent-up emotion he had buried deep within himself.
You couldn't believe this was how he was going to take your virginity, and you, his. While you were painfully upset at him. You thought about how you had different plans for how you wanted your first time to go, though, your focus was shifted back onto Riki as you felt him slightly lift your oversized shirt. He left gentle kisses across the skin on your abdomen, in which left you with chills running up your spine. He then tugged at the waistband of your sweatpants, helping you take them off. He left another trail of wet kisses up your legs and thighs, stopping at your soaked panties, almost drooling over the sight. Riki's eyes, puffy and red, found yours again. You gave him a nod, reassuring him that he could proceed.
His hands tugged the soft fabric down, his lips placing a kiss where your body needed him the most. He slipped a finger between your folds, wanting to ensure you were ready for him. Your body reacted immediately, your hips lifted off the bed and into his touch. He lips traveled up your body, and found their way back to yours in a sweet kiss. He reached a hand between your bodies, tugging at his boxers.
His voice was gentle as you felt him rub his length against your wetness, "Ready?"
"Yeah," You breathed out,
Riki's gaze didn't leave yours as he pushed himself into your core excruciatingly slowly, eliciting a gasp from you. He groaned at the feeling of having you finally wrapped around him. It took him a few moments to bottom out inside, before he waited for you to adjust to his size. He carefully analyzed your face for any signs of pain or discomfort. You were seeing stars at the feeling and size of him.
Riki became alarmed when he noticed your eyes starting to fill with tears yet again, he wasn't aware of the fact that it was due to how much of an emotional mess you were in the moment. You couldn't deny your anger towards him, yet you also couldn't deny the fact that you loved him more than anything and anyone in the world.
"Keep going," You broke the silence. He kissed your tears away before he began to thrust carefully into you, his gaze switching between your eyes and lips. A finger of yours settled on his bottom lip as you scanned his gorgeous features.
"Does it f-feel okay?" He managed to choke out quietly against your finger, as he continued his actions. Your back arched, your chest pushed against his.
Another moan escaped your lips, "More than okay,"
You could feel your release build up over the next few minutes as he repeatedly hit all of the right spots, he was thrusting into you like there was no tomorrow. Your hands ran along the soft skin of his back, he was so warm. The thin layer of sweat covering him made his skin glisten.
"Y/n," He panted into your ear, from what you could tell, he was very close, "I'm so sorry,"
You were closer.
A short, high-pitched moan fell out of your lips as you felt yourself come undone, Riki's pace quickened as he chased his own high. You choked out a sentence you had been meaning to tell Riki for a long time, in the middle of it all.
"I- I love you," You cried, barely being able to speak, your hands still stuck to the bed sheets,
Riki's gaze shifted back to your face instantaneously, he thought he was hearing things. His lips bit at yours as he pulled out and released all over your tummy, the sticky liquid felt warm against your skin. He felt another tear run down one of his cheeks, he was so overriden with emotions he didn't know what to do with himself.
"I love you so much more," The boy panted, trying to regain his breath as he laid his head on top of you, his chin nuzzling between your clothed breasts.
You pushed his hair out of his face as you raised an eyebrow at him, your voice tired, "But I'm still angry at you,"
His eyes closed as a light chuckle escaped his mouth, gaze soon softening as he continued to watch your face. Your fingers were still within the messy strands of his hair.
"I can live with that, but I can't live without you,"
His statement felt like a stab at your chest, god, you truly did love him.
"I never regretted becoming yours," You sighed as you suddenly remembered the angry sentence you spat at your boyfriend, just to get a reaction out of him for how he emotionally hurt you.
Riki moved his body to place a kiss on the side of your neck. He nuzzled into the space, his arms hung around your figure. He kept you close.
"I can't live without you either, Riki, we'll work through this."
...
Copyright Ā© 2024 riki-dazed. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED | Do NOT edit, copy, translate or repost any of my work without permission.
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yawnderu Ā· 11 months ago
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ramp up the angst by reader suddenly agreeing that ā€˜yes, it is the last timeā€™ coz sheā€™s tired of all the sneaking, feeling empty after dbf!simon leaves, and wanting to feel loved and to love freely in return.
letā€™s force simon to make the move and to choose between love and friendship. šŸ˜ˆ
ANON. UR MIND.
Loving Simon is tiring. You can give and give, and he'll do is take, never giving back even when you're empty. Kept a secret, he only dares to show you affection when he wants something out of you. Cuddles come with groping, and while sex is nice... it's difficult not to want more when you've been in love with him for years.
He was right, it was the last time. The last time until he learns how to grow a pair and decide what's best for both of you. Any cuddles he wants to give you finish as soon as he starts to grope you, pushing him away and telling him you're not in the mood. He's a patient man, way too patient and understanding, yet being rejected by you every single time he tries to initiate things is new.
''Gonna tell me what's your problem?'' He ambushes you once your father leaves to go to the store, arms crossed across his chest and blocking your way out of the room. Simon never uses his body to intimidate you on purpose or get in your way, but he knows you'll avoid conversation unless he does so.
''I don't have a problem.'' You bite the inside of your cheek, crossing your arms as well as you look up at him. The sight is nothing short of adorable, the urge to pinch your cheeks and shake you around passing through his mind, though it's cut short pretty fast.
''That's bollocks.'' He points out, walking closer to you and forcing you to crane your neck just to keep eye contact. You let out a frustrated sigh, eyebrows furrowed as you look up at him.
''Fine. Want to know what my fucking problem is?'' He stays quiet, simply nodding once in acknowledgement.
''You are my problem, Simon. You just... came into my life and ruined it.'' If he's affected by your words, his stoic expression is doing a great job at hiding it.
''You ruined me for everyone else. Can't date, can't flirt, can't even think about hooking up with someone to forget about you because they're not worth itā€” they're not you.'' There's tears rimming your eyes as you speak, trying to keep them in until you look away and a choked sob escapes your lips, the dam finally breaking as you sit down in bed, pathetically making yourself smaller for him even when it's not necessary.
''No one will ever be like you and Iā€” I don't know what to do, Simon. I fucking love you, but you treat me like I'm... like I'm just a toy.'' Your hands go up to cover your face, not allowing him the pleasure of seeing the tears roll down your cheeks and the pained expression on your face.
Silence.
It's quiet for what feels like forever until he crouches down in front of you, hands grasping your wrists and moving them away from your face. He cups your cheeks as soon as he sees the trail of tears staining your pretty skin, soft kisses planted all over your face while all you can do is let him.
'''M sorry.'' He mutters once he's done kissing you all over, face hiding on the crook of your neck as he lets out a soft sigh, preparing himself to make a decision once and for all.
''Your old man means the world to me. You know that, yeah?'' He keeps going once you nod your head, one hand holding yours while the other runs up and down your back soothingly.
''And you mean the world to him. Hell, you mean the world to me. I know it's fuckin' stupid, but I'm scared he'll keep you away from me.'' Your small scoff earns you a chuckle coming out of his lips, looking up just to see the pretty frown on your lips.
''Like hell he will. He'll be happy if... if we date, you know? No one treats me the way you do.'' You manage to speak despite the tears, drying your eyes with the sleeve of your hoodieā€” his hoodie.
''I know.'' He whispers softly, brown eyes shining with understanding. He's so vulnerable and so fucking scared he almost feels pathetic.
''I know.'' He repeats, sitting down next to you and holding you on his lap, as close to him as possible while your face is buried on his chest.
''... I'll tell him.'' He promises, planting a small kiss on your forehead, unaware of the man listening to the conversation with a small smile on his lips. He knows, of course he knows.
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spiceofvy Ā· 1 year ago
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SKZ - Reader get's insecure during sex
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cw: gender neutral reader, nsfw, insecurities, body image issues, comfort, lots of praise, bottom reader (Minho), mirror sex (Minho), overstimulation (Jeongin), my Changbin bias is very obvious in this one
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Chan: Kisses you softly after your confession. Worried about what made you feel that way. He feels so sad that someone or something in your past made you so insecure, that you even feel uncomfortable around him. Wants to make sure you don't ever feel like that again. "Let me take your mind off it, I promise I will make you feel better." From now on whenever you have sex he spends a ton of time complimenting you and caressing your body. Worshiping you, holding you close as he tells you again and again how lucky he is to get to see you in such a vulnerable position.
Minho: when you tell him he is taken aback a bit. He loves you so much, so he can't understand how you could not love yourself. "Can we try something? I wanna show you how beautiful you are." as he pulls you in front of his mirror, and fucks you in front of it. Making you look at yourself as you cum. Holding your face tightly so you can't break eye contact with yourself. After he is finished he carries you to the bathtub and slowly washes you body, whispering sweet praise into your shoulders.
Changbin: This man does not allow any kind of insecurities in his bedroom. He will worship it all out of your system. He lays you out in front of him and starts kissing every piece of skin. Every curve or angle. Every knuckle, every spot. While whispering the sweetest words into your ear. Calling you pet names. Tells you how beautiful you are to him. How perfect. How grateful he is to be able to touch you. And touching you he does. He probably makes you cum during so. And afterward, he holds you, not caring if he came too. He holds you and kisses your temple, promising the world to you. "So pretty. So perfect. My stunning love. I will not let you believe that you are anything but beautiful."
Hyunjin: He looks you dead in the eyes and pulls out his sketchbook showing all the stunning pieces of art he did inspired by you. Portraits of you with intricate sketches and watercolors are all so beautiful that it takes your breath away. "Would you call my art ugly too? Then why do you insult my muse like that?" He then makes some very slow love with you. Whispering in your ear how he hopes to someday draw you in a situation like this too.
Jisung: "Noooo babe, you're too hot to be insecure." He tries to pull a joke to put you into a better mindset. But in reality he is so heartbroken because he loves you so much and he wants you to always feel like the amazing person you are. Kisses you for a long time as you slowly makes love to you. He softly touches you all over you body, caressing your skin, telling you all his favorite parts of your body. Which are to no surprise: all of them.
Felix: He looks so devastated. He knows how terrible body image issues feel and to know that you feel like that too, it breaks his heart. He believes that you are too amazing to go through stuff like that, and that the world is so unfair to make you feel like that. Bites back some tears as he holds you tightly. "Please don't ever question your beauty." You have a deep conversation about insecurities, and how to deal with them. Afterwards he starts kissing you softly, and you making out turns into slow sex again.
Seungmin: He understands how you feel. He struggled with insecurities before and so he puts everything he has into making sure you can feel better. He whispers soft compliments into your skin as he slowly pushes you over the edge. During aftercare he wraps you in your favorite blanket and as he feeds you snacks he tells you about how he overcame his own insecurities. "You are the most beautiful person in this world, believe me please."
Jeongin: Oh sweet soft boy. He takes it slow. Pressing kisses to your skin. Holding you softly. He tells you how amazing you look to him. How lucky he is to have you. As he slowly kisses down your body. Whispering love into your thighs, looking up to you like you're the world. "Please let me show you just how beautiful I think you are." He makes you cum a lot that night. Whispering the softest words into your ear as he slowly pushes you into overstimulation.
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stylesispunk Ā· 11 months ago
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"The not so invisible string" | part 2
Not outbreak! Joel Miller x f! Reader
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summary: you and Joel were made right for each other at the wrong time. Now, thirteen years later your paths crossed when both of your daughters get in trouble at school. Would be the right time for you now?
chapter summary: You and Joel had a "lunch" together and some things were said, and the past between you both is meeting the present.
word count: 5k.
warnings: angst, implications of cheating (emotional). I probably made some grammar mistakes because I write things fast. Not proofreading, ups. Italics are flashbacks <3
a/n: Chapter two is here!! Thank you so much for your nice comments and appreciation for the previous chapter, I didn't think it would be good enough but thanks for appreciating. This one is less intense than the first one, but we still have a story to develop. I'm on my summer break from work, so I hope to have time to keep writing. Reblogs and comments are always appreciated. Happy reading šŸ’Œ p.s if you wann be taglisted, please I'm so shy so I feel asshamed of tagging people if you don't tell me šŸ˜³ and if I forgot someone, sorry šŸ˜­
dividers by @/saradika
"Are you waiting to see her again?" Sarah asked when Joel was parking outside school before driving to his job.
"Who?" He asked, trying to dismiss the nagging feeling settled in his stomach at the minimum possibility of seeing you again.
"Tara's mom?" She said, leaning toward his dad, "What's the issue with her, by the way? Was she your ex or something?ā€
"No,ā€ he said immediately.
ā€œSo why did you get so nervous?"
"She is the love of my life," he confessed, not turning his face to Sarah in shame of being seen in such a vulnerable state.
When you were a parent, you never showed yourself vulnerable in front of your children; you never allowed them to see that part of you thatā€™s beneath what they knew. But when they grow up, they understand you would never be a hero, but a human living life for the first time too.
Sarah's eyes widened at Joel's unexpected confession. The revelation hung in the air, leaving a palpable tension inside the car.
"The love of your life?" Sarah echoed, her voice a mix of surprise and curiosity. "But you never mentioned her before."
Joel sighed, his eyes fixed on the steering wheel as if it held the answers to a long-buried history. "It's complicated," he finally admitted. "We were each other's first love, but things didn't work out. We went our separate ways, and I thought I had moved on."
"But seeing her again..." he continued, his voice laced with a hint of vulnerability. "I never expected her to be here again."
Sarah studied Joel's profile, recognizing the struggle in his eyes. "And what about Tara's mom? Does she feel the same way?"
"I don't know," Joel confessed, a heaviness settling in his chest. "It's been thirteen years, and a lot has changed. She has a daughter now, and I have my own life."
Sarah reached out, placing a comforting hand on her dadā€™s shoulder. "Well, life is surprising," she said. "Maybe it's a chance for both of you to find closure, or maybe even something more. Who knows?"
Joel nodded, the weight of the past and the uncertainty of the future swirling around him.
ā€œPerhapsā€ He said, ā€œOkay, now go to class before you get late.ā€ He hurried Sarah, but before she closed the door, a bolt of thought invaded his mind before he could even think.
ā€œCan I ask you for a favor?ā€
She nodded.
ā€œAsk Tara for her motherā€™s number, please.ā€
Sarah grinned, nodding her head and blowing a kiss to his father.
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The days had passed, and life had settled into a new routine for you, unemployed and doing house chores, feeling just as the same twenty-two-year-old you once were.
But that wasnā€™t your only thought in the back of your mind. Since the day you had seen Joel, you hadnā€™t been able to take him off your mind, and as if it werenā€™t already difficult, Tara and Sarah were slowly becoming best friends, just as you and Joel were someday back when you had anything to lose.
For Joel, things werenā€™t different. There wasnā€™t a second of the day since he had seen you that he hadnā€™t thought about you. About how gorgeous you still looked and how much he had missed you for the past years. Despite the investable passing of time, the past seemed to cast a long shadow over the present; he couldnā€™t shake the nagging feeling that had resurfaced since he saw you.
Late one night, he found himself staring at his phone. Since Sarah got your number from Tara, he has been doing the same, contemplating whether to send a message. The words formed in his mind, but typing them out was a whole different thing for him. Trapped between the enormous desire to know about you or to let go of the best thing that had ever happened to him.
But before he could even formulate the thought, he pressed send.
Unknown number
"Hi, itā€™s me, Joel"
Your phone vibrated on your side of the bed.
"Honey?" Dwight called out,
ā€œYes?" you asked from the bathroom.
ā€œWhy is a Joel messaging you at this hour?ā€
You paused, the sensation of cold cream on your fingertips suddenly forgotten. The name "Joel" seemed too foreign on Dwight's lips; you even felt guilty.
"It's probably just something about Tara," you replied, forcing nonchalance into your tone. But the unease crept into your voice, betraying the facade.
Dwight's curiosity lingered in the room as you picked up your phone. The screen illuminated with a new message, and the familiar ache resurfaced in your heart.
Unknown number
Sorry for sending this at this time, but I've been thinking a lot about you since our unexpected meeting, and I was wondering if we could talk. No pressure, just a conversation.
You felt a mix of emotionsā€”surprise, apprehension, and a tinge of curiosity. The late-night timing added an unexpected layer of intensity to the message.
"Honey, is everything okay?" Dwight's voice carried a note of concern.
"Yeah, it's probably about Tara or something. I'll go better call him,ā€ you replied, forcing a smile. But deep down, you knew that hearing his voice through a phone would do enough damage to you.
ā€œHello sunshine! How itā€™s my best girl doing?ā€ he exclaimed, his sleepy voice from this time in the morning melted you.
ā€œIā€™m better now that you calledā€
ā€œRemember Iā€™m always just a call away from you, doeā€
The hallway felt colder as you left the room, and the phone gripped tightly in your hand. Your heart raced against your chest, its rhythm echoing the uncertainty of the moment. As you pressed the button to call Joel, each second felt like an eternity.
The phone rang once, twice, and on the third ring, Joel's voice filled the air. "Hello?"
"How did you get my number?ā€ you asked
"I... "I... uh, well," Joel stammered on the other end of the line, a hint of unease in his voice. "Sarah got it from Tara.ā€
Your mind raced with a mix of emotionsā€”surprise, frustration, and a touch of understanding due to your daughtersā€™ becoming friends.
"You could have asked," you replied, the tension evident in your voice. "But fine, what did you want to talk about?"
There was a pause, and you could almost hear Joel gathering his thoughts on the other end. "I've been thinking a lot about the past, about us," he admitted. "I never got the chance to properly apologize for how things ended. I just want to talk, to understand, and maybe find closure."
Closure. The word hung in the air, heavy with the weight of the years gone by.
You didnā€™t want to have closure with him; you didnā€™t want to forget.
"Joel, it's been thirteen years," you said, a mix of weariness and frustration coloring your words. "We've both moved on. What's the point of digging up the past now?"
"I know, and I respect that," Joel responded, his tone earnest. "But I've carried the weight of what happened between us for a long time. Maybe talking about it will help both of us. Besides Sarah and Tara, we could talk about them."
You sighed, the complexity of the situation settling around you. "Fine, let's meet. But just this once. I have a life, Joel, and I can't afford to let the past disrupt it."
"Thank you," Joel said, a note of gratitude in his voice. "I appreciate this, truly. Let's find a time.
"Tomorrow,ā€ you said, interrupting his rambling.
Tomorrow? It seemed like too soon you were conflicted between the desire to see him again and the guilt of not being able to erase that part of your life.
ā€œOkay, tomorrow at lunchā€ he spoke after what it seemed like minutes ā€œIā€™ll send you the address.ā€
ā€œOkay.ā€ You whispered, ā€œHave a goodnight, Joelā€
ā€œGood night, doeā€ he replied, before realizing how he had called you, he ended the call leaving you with no chance to answer back.
You were speechless, and the hallway felt emptier than before. Nobody had called you ā€œDoeā€ since you parted ways with Joel, as if the nickname was forbidden from the lips of any person who wasnā€™t him, carrying a reminder of a time when the two of you shared your own language.
ā€œFrom now on Iā€™m calling you, Doeā€
ā€œWhy?ā€ you asked, tilting your head
ā€œBecause you looked so innocent with those bright eyes of you and you remind me of Bambi but I donā€™t want to call you thatā€
ā€œWhatā€™s wrong with Bambi?ā€
ā€œNothingā€ he replied, ā€œWe could actually be like Bambi and Thumperā€
As you walked back into the bedroom, Dwight looked up from his book, sensing the turmoil in your expression. "Everything okay?"
You nodded, forcing a smile. "Yes, just Joel wants to meet tomorrow to talk."
Dwight raised an eyebrow, concern etched on his face. "Are you sure about this? You don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with. I can go."
"No, I know," you replied, sinking onto the bed. "But itā€™s nothing bad... I actually know Joel from before. "You confessed without looking at Dwight.ā€
Dwight's expression softened as he processed your confession. "Before we met?"
You nodded, finally meeting his gaze. "Yeah, Joel and I have history. We were closeā€”really close. We were actually best friends,ā€ you said, omitting the ā€œhe is the love of my lifeā€ part.
Understanding flickered in Dwight's eyes, and he reached out, gently cupping your face. "You don't have to go through with this if it makes you uncomfortable. I trust you, and I trust whatever decision you make."
A mix of gratitude and guilt welled up within you. "I appreciate that, Dwight.ā€
He nodded, offering a supportive smile. "I'll be here for you, no matter what."
After that, Dwight closed his book and said goodnight to you, falling asleep a few minutes later. It seemed odd for you, but you couldnā€™t help but feel weird because of his attitude, as if he didnā€™t care about you meeting with another guy.
Dwight's seemingly indifferent response to your revelation about Joel left you feeling conflicted. Was it a sign of trust and confidence in your commitment to the present, or was there an undercurrent of something else?
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As you drove to the restaurant Joel had suggested, your mind buzzed with memories of your shared past. The streets seemed to echo with the laughter and conversations of your younger selves. Navigating through familiar lanes, you couldn't escape the gravitational pull of nostalgia.
The restaurant's entrance loomed ahead, and you found yourself hesitating. The realization struckā€”this wasn't just a casual meeting; it was a reunion with someone who had once been the center of your world.
Once you stepped inside the restaurant Joel told you about, you were faced with reality. You were a married woman, going to have lunch not with another man who was your ex-boyfriend but with the love of your life. Your heart was beating so hard against your ribcage that you almost felt how your bones crashed at the impact.
You stopped at the entrance; your face was heating up. You wanted to leave, but before you could even make up your mind, those brown eyes found you, and you couldn't turn away.
Breathe in, breathe out.
One step, then another step.
It seemed like hours, but there you were, in front of the boy with brown eyes who put a bandage on your knee when you fell on the pavement at 5 years old. You were there in front of the teenager who kissed you at seventeen on a random night after doing homework in your bedroom.
You had decided to conquer the worldā€”or at least the little corner of it that belonged to your shared imagination. As you ran through the streets, giggles and laughter echoing, it happenedā€”the inevitable collision with the ground. Your knees met the pavement, and the sting of scraped skin sent tears streaming down your cheeks.
That's when Joel appeared, like a knight in a tiny superhero cape. His mom, hearing the commotion, had rushed him outside to play. In his hand, he held a box of colorful, cartoon-themed band-aids. With the unwavering confidence of a five-year-old, he approached you.
"Don't cry, okay? I've got something to fix you up," Joel declared, his eyes wide with sincerity.
As he carefully placed a band-aid on your scraped knee, something shifted. It was more than just a simple act of putting on a band-aid; it was the beginning of a connection that would thread through the fabric of your lives for years to come.
"See, all is better!" Joel announced, grinning proudly as if he had just mended the universe. ā€œIā€™m Joel,ā€ he said happily. ā€œWhatā€™s your name?ā€
You were surprised and speechless; you felt enamored by the kid in front of you, but in your brain, the boy was still gross.
Joel's expression mirrored a mix of surprise and recognition. For a moment, the world seemed to pause as you both stood there, caught in the gravity of your intertwined past.
But it seemed to be the night you were back in the house he had bought with the help of his parents, where you were supposed to grow old together. It looked like that night you came back, hoping to begin again.
But it wasn't, and time didn't stop because two lovers couldn't survive in the currents of the sea.
"Hi, doe," he greeted you, standing up from his seat.
Doe.
"Joel," you greeted back, gracing a small smile.
"Lovie" is forbidden now.
"Please, take a seat," he said, signaling at the seat in front of him.
You didn't know how to react, what to do, or what to say, so you sat on the chair, trying to ease your heart's beating.
Joel's gaze never left your form; instead, it traveled down your figure, but the golden band on your finger stopped his curious gaze, and somehow he felt the urge to cry.
He had always pictured the shiny rock he had bought for you back those years ago, wrapped around your finger.
If he had told you he spent those late nights doing extra work only to buy that piece of jewelry for you, perhaps you would be the one wearing it now, and in this situation, it would be one of those moments you share lunch between your work schedules.
But that shiny ring wrapped echoes of missed opportunities, and the haunting what-ifs painted a poignant portrait of a love that had slipped through his fingers.
You had been waiting, the anticipation mingling with worry as the hands of the clock inched forward. The scent of a hastily prepared dinner lingered in the air, growing colder with each passing minute. Joel's absence, became a palpable presence in the room.
As the door finally creaked open, revealing Joel's figure in the dim light, a wave of emotions crashed over you. The relief of his arrival was quickly overshadowed by the frustration that had been building within.
"Joel, do you have any idea what time it is?" you snapped, the words escaping before you could temper the edge in your voice.
Joel's expression shifted, caught off guard by the sudden confrontation. "I lost track of time at work. I'm sorry," he offered, attempting to diffuse the tension.
The apology, however, fell on ears numbed by the repetition of similar excuses. The words that followed, laden with accusations and frustrations, transformed the night into a battleground of emotions. The promises made in the glow of love were replaced by the harsh reality of unmet expectations.
"I can't do this, Joel. I can't keep waiting for you every night," you uttered your voice a mix of exhaustion and hurt.
He sighed, running a hand through his hair in a gesture of frustration. "I'm doing all of this for us. I'm working hard to provide for our future."
He had never sold the ring; he couldn't do it, thinking you would have come back to your home and built your story from the cracked fragments.
But he had made a mistake; however, that mistake that made you slip through his fingers brought his daughter to him, and he couldnā€™t find the strength to blame that night anymore.
And he thought that for you, it may have been the same; you have had a daughter too, and he knows that you love her more than life itself.
It was almost poetic; the mistakes that had separated you had, in a strange twist of fate, become the catalyst for a reunion. The bond between Joel and his daughter, the same bond you had with Tara, seemed to mirror the intricate threads that wove your lives together once again.
ā€œSo, how have you been?ā€ he began asking.
ā€œI thought you wanted to talk about our daughters,ā€ you replied, deflecting the conversation to the common ground that had brought you back together.
Joel's eyes held a glimmer of nostalgia. "Come on, Doe, you know I care about you."
ā€œPlease donā€™t call me that,ā€ you pleaded in almost a whisper.
Joel's expression shifted, a mix of realization and regret flickering across his features. "I'm sorry," he apologized, the sincerity in his voice evident. "I didn't mean to.ā€
ā€œBut Iā€™ve been fine.ā€ You finally said that, looking at him.
ā€œIā€™m glad,ā€ he said. ā€œI canā€™t help but be surprised about you being Taraā€™s mother."
ā€œWhy? Is it too hard to believe Iā€™m a mother?ā€
Joel's eyes softened, and he shook his head. "No, it's not that. It's just... it's surreal, you know? Seeing you as a mother, I mean, Tara is the same age as Sarah.ā€
ā€œI got pregnant a few months after we..."
ā€œWe broke up,ā€ he said, ending the sentence for you.
ā€œYes. I met Dwight one night, and I got pregnant.ā€
ā€œYou got over things soon, then,ā€ he added in an undertone.
ā€œWhat does that mean?ā€ You asked in a defensive tone.
Joel sighed, a mixture of emotions playing across his face. "I didn't mean it like that. It's just... seeing you move on so quickly, it's
"No, tell me!ā€ you exclaimed. ā€œDo you think it was going to be easy for me to stay with you while you take care of another woman who was carrying your baby? 2
ā€œYet, you still had a daughter with another man.ā€
ā€œSo what? It was forbidden for me to hook up with a guy because I was fucking broke. Yes, I ended up pregnant, but...
ā€œBut what?ā€ he inquired.
ā€œIt should have been you!" You cried, not knowing why you were acting so childish. "It was always supposed to be you." You repeated, calmer, "Since we were seventeen, I picture you being the father of my child."
Joel's gaze held a mix of surprise and remorse, realizing the depth of your emotions. "Doe, I never meant to hurt you. I had my own struggles, and I made mistakes."
"It's not about the mistakes, Joel," you said, wiping away a tear. "It's about the dreams we had and how they shattered. I loved you, and I imagined a future with you.
The silence that followed was suffocating, filled with the weight of unsaid words and the echoes of a shared past. The restaurant seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you in a bubble of unresolved emotions.
ā€œYou know this is repeating again,ā€ you chuckled between tears. ā€œIā€™m here with you while Iā€™m crying all over again. I had to leave my job and move back to the city that throws the past in my face, and I canā€™t find aĀ  job."You covered your face with your hands.
Joel's eyes held a mixture of empathy and regret as he listened to your words. The ache of the past lingered in the air, a haunting reminder of the dreams that had slipped through your fingers.
"I wish I could change it all," Joel confessed, his voice heavy with the weight of shared regrets. "I never wanted you to leave, and seeing you hurt now... it hurts me too."
"But we can't go back," you replied with a resigned tone in your voice. "We're both different people now, living different lives. Maybe it's time to accept that some wounds don't fully heal."
ā€œBut we can be civil to each other, at least for our daughterā€™s sake,ā€ he said, his voice soft.
You looked at him, your tear-streaked face reflecting a mixture of pain and acceptance. For a moment, you considered his words, acknowledging the shared responsibility of raising daughters who were connected by a blossoming friendship.
"Yeah," you agreed, a weary smile on your face. "We owe it to them to be civil, to show them that even when things don't work out, people can still be respectful and caring."
Joel nodded, a somber understanding passing between you. At that moment, you both recognized the importance of setting aside personal grievances for the sake of your daughters.
ā€œYou know? About the job, Tommy and I need an assistant.ā€
Your eyes widened at Joel's unexpected offer; the surprise was evident on your face. The mention of a job opportunity brought a glimmer of hope amid the emotional turbulence. It was as if a door, long thought closed, cracked open with the possibility of a new beginning.
"An assistant?" you repeated, the idea taking a moment to sink in. "Are you serious?"
Joel nodded, a faint smile playing on his lips. "Yeah, I am. We're expanding, and having you would be nice.ā€
"I appreciate the offer," you finally said, your voice cautious. "But-
ā€œJust think about it; if you want the job, you can call me tomorrow or go to our office," Joel added, his tone sincere.
ā€œYou know what? He asked after your silence, leaning into the table, "You are still looking at me with the same eyes you did before.ā€
You blinked, caught off guard by his observation. There was a moment of vulnerability in his eyesā€”a flicker of the past that hadn't entirely dissipated. The connection between you, despite the years and the changes, lingered in the unspoken words that floated in the air.
"I don't know what you mean," you replied, attempting to mask the emotions that swirled within.
Joel chuckled softly, a nostalgic warmth in his gaze. "Doe, you always had this way of seeing through me. Even now, those eyes of yours... they haven't changed."
"I'm married."
ā€œSo what? Canā€™t you have friends? He asked.
ā€œWhat about Sarahā€™s mother? Wouldnā€™t she get mad at you for being with your ex-girlfriend?"
ā€œThatā€™s funny because weā€™re not together,ā€ he confessed with a weird smile on his face. ā€œWe never were together. After Sarah was born, she left us.ā€
The revelation hung in the air, a mix of surprise and confusion settling between you. The complexity of his past mirrored your own, and in that shared vulnerability, there was an unspoken understanding.
"I'm sorry to hear that," you offered, genuine sympathy in your voice.
"It's okay," Joel replied, a shrug accompanying his words. "She is married to another man, and she had a son, but I won because I had Sarah.ā€
ā€œItā€™s fun how our daughters brought us together,ā€ you said calmly.
"It's true," Joel acknowledged, a wistful smile playing on his lips. Our daughters seem to be the common thread weaving through our lives now."
You smiled, feeling butterflies dancing inside your stomach. The closeness to Joel felt foreign yet so familiar, and all the sentiments making your way through your heart were there again, suffocating you.
ā€œI should get going,ā€ you said, out of the blue.
ā€œBut you haven't eaten yet.ā€
ā€œI know, but itā€™s getting late, and I have to go back to my house.ā€
"Okay,ā€ he said, knowing you were making a lie to run away again, yet he didnā€™t pressure you.
"I appreciate you taking the time to talk," Joel said, breaking the silence. "And about the job, just think it over. No pressure. Whatever you decide, I'm here for you, even if it's just as a friend."
ā€œThank you, Joel,ā€ you smiled.
And when you walked away to leave the restaurant, you stopped by the door just to have a second look at him, and when you turned, he was looking at you just as you knew he would.
You smiled at him, and he smiled back at you, mouthing a quiet "take care" in a language only your interlocked gazes understood.
And once you stepped outside, he was left in the restaurant, following you with his eyes.
You weren't the mother of his friend's daughter, but the girl in two ponytails was crying because of a scratch on her knee.
You were once his best friend,
You were once his lover, but that word was a small portion of what you were to him. No, you weren't his lover, but his twin flame that painted every single day of his life blueā€”the flame that never allowed him to dream about anybody else but you.
And you were the love of his life.
But Joel would do anything to get back on the first step, just to keep you close. He would rather have you back as his best friend than not have you anymore, even if his heart hurts in the process.
You were never his, but he felt the string pulling you together, just like the unbreakable chain you had hanging around your neck since he had memories of you, and he was going to do things right this time because he wasn't able to play pretend knowing there was no gap between you anymore.
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You drove around the city for an hour straight, navigating through the streets. Joel used to drive you around when trying to ease your mood after fights with your parents.
You had taken your love and packed it in a tiny little box to protect your heart from breaking.
And when you stopped outside your house, you cried. You sobbed like a little girl waking up from a nightmare. Joel still echoed in your mind, and you accepted that you would never be able to let that part of your life go, so you sobbed, and in that moment of vulnerability, you allowed yourself to grieve for what was lost.
ā€œPretty girls shouldnā€™t cry,ā€ Joel said when you didnā€™t say your name after his introduction.
As the tears subsided, you took a deep breath, the weight in your chest easing slightly, and you stepped out of your car and walked to your house.
The key turned in the lock, the door creaked open, and you stepped into the coldness of your home. You thought about the offer Joel talked to you about, but accepting would be a suicide, and as tempting as the invitation seemed at the edge of your consciousness. However, spending more hours of the day seeing him seemed like being unfaithful to your husband.
As you walked into the living room, Tara glanced up from her phone, and you noticed the concern in her eyes.
"Hi, mom," Tara said, greeting you with a smile on her face.
"Hey, sweets," you said, smiling back at her.
"How was it with Joel?" she asked, setting aside her phone.
"It was... complicated," you admitted, sinking onto the couch beside her.
Tara placed a supportive hand on your shoulder. "Complicated how?"
"He offered me a job," you explained, "and it's not an easy decision to make."
"A job? Why?" Tara asked, her curiosity piqued.
"He thought it could be a good opportunity for us," you replied, choosing your words carefully.
Tara's eyes widened in realization.
ā€œTo rekindle our friendship,ā€ you said, before she thought badly of you.
"Are you considering it?"
You sighed, grateful for your daughter's understanding. "I don't know, sweetheart. It's a lot to think about. It's not just a job; it's a connection to our past, to him."
Tara nodded thoughtfully. "Well, whatever you decide, I'm here for you. Just make sure it's what you want.ā€
ā€œAnd what about your dad?ā€ you asked
ā€œHe is not your boss."
Tara's straightforward response made you chuckle. "No, he's not. But he's my husband, and I should consider his feelings too."
Tara rolled her eyes. "Mom, you're allowed to have a life outside of being a wife.ā€
You admired Tara's maturity, appreciating the clarity in her perspective. "You've grown into a wise young woman, you know that?"
A hint of a smile touched Tara's lips. "Well, I've had a good teacher." She leaned in for a hug, and you embraced her, thankful for the bond you shared.
You found yourself alone with your thoughts. The house was quiet, and the decision about Joel's job offer lingered in the air like a delicate whisper. You knew it wasn't just about work; it was about revisiting a past that had shaped you in ways you couldn't deny.
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Later, after Tara had gone to do her homework, you found yourself alone with your thoughts. The house was quiet, still not in sight of Dwight coming home, and the decision about Joel's job offer lingered in the air like a delicate whisper. You knew it wasn't just about work; it was about revisiting a past that had shaped you in ways you couldn't deny.
Taking a deep breath, you picked up your phone and dialed Joel's number. The call rang for a few moments, and then his voice filled the silence. "Hello?"
"Hi, Joel. It's me," you said, the hesitation evident in your voice.
"Doe?" he responded, surprised.
"What did I say about calling me that?" you asked, with a tiny smile on your face.
ā€œRight. Iā€™m sorryā€
"I've been thinking about your job offer. Can we meet tomorrow at your workplace to talk about it?"
A brief pause followed, and then Joel replied, "Of course, I'll text you the address.ā€
"Okay,ā€ you said. ā€œSee you tomorrow, then.ā€
ā€œSee you tomorrow,ā€ he replied. ā€œTake care.ā€
The call ended, leaving you with a mix of anticipation and uncertainty about what was coming into your life again.
Towards the end of the conversation, Tommy glanced at Joel with a skeptical smile on his face. "Do we really need an assistant?" he inquired, unaware of his brother's hidden intentions.
"No," Joel replied, a smile playing on his lips. "But we're going to have one."
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tags šŸ’Œ: @joeldjarin @missladym1981
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eggluverz Ā· 1 year ago
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A STARE WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS
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PAIRING. dan feng x gn!reader
WORD COUNT. 1.4k
SUMMARY. you and dan feng were just friends. close comrades who challenged each other. but you were starting to suspect that just friends don't stare at each other like this...
NOTE: dan feng on the brain !!!! i was looking thru some writing prompts and there was a list of friends to lovers that inspired meeee :> i hope y'all enjoy this lil dan feng drabble!! :o ~sof
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It wasnā€™t always easy being a friend of the esteemed High Cloud Quintet, but it sure was fun. In a group of warriors and leaders, some of your morals seemed to go against the grain. With your more pacifist approach, you preferred healing and mediating disagreements rather than resorting to a clash of the swords.
Still, you were not young with folly such as before. You understood there was a time and place for everything and, sometimes, war was inevitable in this world. You could only sigh to yourself, wishing it werenā€™t so.
But while battles waged on, you at least wanted to help those wounded trying to fight for what was rightā€”no matter how misguided you thought their approach was.
Dan Feng was someone you chose to confide in. The great warrior, the Imbibitor Lunae, somehow empathized with your inner conflicts more than you would have expected him to. He may have been a cutthroat, fearless leader, but he was also gentle and thoughtful, pondering whether or not the ends truly justified the means in between brutal battles.Ā 
The people he led could never see that ever-questioning side of him. Nor could he ever find the vulnerability to show them. That was something he reserved only for the closest of friends.Ā 
That was something he reserved only for you.Ā 
You let out a deep breath after a long day of work, smiling only to greet Dan Feng who had asked you to meet up with him over dinner.
ā€œLike a date,ā€ Baiheng sang with a grin when you had told her the previous day.
Your cheeks flushed at the memory. Two friends could certainly partake in evening consumption of sustenance together without it being a date, you had reminded her. And yourself.Ā 
ā€œSure, but do just friends stare into each otherā€™s eyes for seconds too long like you two do?ā€
With a small laugh and a shake of your head, you brought yourself back to present time with Dan Feng.
ā€œGood evening,ā€ you greeted with a wave. ā€œHave you been waiting long?ā€
ā€œI have been left alone here all day waiting for your arrival,ā€ he jested with a dramatic sigh, one corner of his mouth tilting upwards to let you know he was only joking.
ā€œOf course,ā€ you played along, ā€œI do not doubt that the great Imbibitor Lunae has plenty of time to spare waiting about.ā€
ā€œFor you? Most certainly.ā€Ā 
You fought a grin off your face at his kindness. Dan Feng truly was a good person, always putting his friends first. For a moment, you wondered how much more thoughtful he would be towards a partnerā€”towards someone he had romantic feelings for. But you did not allow yourself to entertain those thoughts for too long. After all, you had food to eat.Ā 
ā€œI requested your favorite dish,ā€ he said as the meal came to your table. Establishments in which private outdoor dining was an accommodation were not common in your area, so you and Dan Feng often frequented the one closest to you. It was no strange feat for him to commit your favorite dish to memory. ā€œI hope I did not overstep, but it was getting dark out and I know you tend to grow rather famished at this hour.ā€
You smiled as the scent of the food in front of you wafted through the air, causing your stomach to grumble quietly. ā€œI appreciate your preparation, Dan Feng. You arenā€™t overstepping in the slightest.ā€
In fact, you quite liked that Dan Feng went out of his way to ensure you would have food to eat by the time you arrived for dinner. He was rightā€” You were running late today and you were rather peckish by the time you had arrived. It was a simple act of kindness, and you were grateful for it.Ā 
Dan Feng really was nice to his friends.Ā 
If you did not have a good head on your shoulders, you might have let your emotions confuse the situation and misread his intentions towards you. He simply was a good friend to you and the High Cloud Quintet, though in moments of delusion you felt yourself imagining more.Ā 
Especially moments of delusion fueled by the unnerving stare on his face directed right at you. Unnerving in a positive sense, of course.Ā 
Unnerving in a way of not being able to understand the depth of emotions behind those bright eyes of his. Unnerving enough to pique your curiosity and want to learn just what that stare meant.Ā 
The certain stare he was giving you right now.Ā 
Was he looking at you like a confidant? A scholar to share his pacifist literature with? A friend? A lover?Ā 
If Dan Feng noticed your inner turmoil, all he did was smile. It was a smile that said he knew exactly what was running through your mind. His piercing gaze stayed locked on yours as he tilted his head and took a sip of tea.Ā 
Unable to help yourself, you blurted, ā€œDo you intend to look at me in such a way?ā€
An expression of delighted amusement formed on his face before he regained his stoic composure. ā€œIn what manner are you referring to, my dear?ā€
Your heart stirred in confusion at his affectionate words. This High Elder truly had a disarming effect on you.
ā€œSuch as how you are staring at me right now!ā€ you cried, feeling rather indignant. ā€œIt is how youā€™ve been staring at me for the past few months, even. Itā€” It bewilders me!ā€
ā€œAnd how, exactly, am I staring at you?ā€ he pushed, a confident smile on his lips as he awaited your answer.Ā 
ā€œYou are staring at meā€¦as if you want me.ā€
His eyes widened for a brief moment, like he was shocked you gave in to his teasing and prodding this time.Ā 
ā€œYou keep staring at me like that, and treating me in a special mannerā€¦ You should be careful, Dan Feng,ā€ you said with a sigh, slowly bringing your utensils to your mouth. Before biting, you stated, ā€œYou could confuse even the most refined of individuals that way, are you aware?ā€
He studied you before asking, ā€œAs an esteemed and refined Vidyadhara yourself, what do you find confusing?ā€
ā€œWhether I am reading your intentions incorrectly or not,ā€ you said, no longer bothering to hide you frustration.Ā 
ā€œIt is not my desire to confuse you,ā€ promised Dan Feng, a genuine look on his face as you finally met his gaze again. ā€œFor that, I apologize sincerely.ā€
Your stomach churned in dejected understanding. ā€œThank you for the apologize. It is okay.ā€
Perhaps you shouldnā€™t have gotten ahead of yourself and confused his kindness for interest. You shoved the food around on your plate, trying to downplay your disappointment that Dan Feng did not desire you after all.
At your lackluster response, he cleared his throat. He looked at your downcast expression and frowned. ā€œPerhaps I am not making myself clear enough. Believe me, you are certainly not misinterpreting my intentions.ā€
Your eyes widened at his clarification. ā€œMeaningā€¦?ā€
ā€œI do want you.ā€ Dan Feng set his teacup down with a conspiratorial glint in his eye. ā€œI admire your strength and your intellect. Your desire for peace and your willingness to do what is right. You are nuanced and complex and, at times, even oblivious,ā€ he smiled at the thought of you misunderstanding his initial confession, ā€œand you are my close friend I have found myself getting more and more drawn to.ā€
Giggles bubbled up from inside you, more so in excitement than in amusement. If it werenā€™t unbecoming of an unpartnered Vidyadhara to show public displays of affection, you would have ran over to Dan Feng and given him a hug by now.Ā 
ā€œI want you, too, Dan Feng,ā€ is what you said instead. ā€œYou are cunning and sharp, yet understanding and gentle. Your thoughtfulness is inspiring and I have never met anyone more loyal than you.ā€Ā 
The apples of his cheeks tinged the lightest pink you had ever seen, and you fought the urge to continuously shower him with more compliments.
ā€œYouā€™re the only one I could confide my potentially treasonous thoughts in,ā€ you laughed while he nodded with amusement. Your gaze softened as your tone grew more serious. ā€œYou are one of my best friends, but I can envision a road in which we are more than that, evenā€” Lovers.ā€
If he was surprised at all, he did not show it.Ā 
ā€œThat is the path I would prefer to take.ā€ Dan Feng extended his hand from across the table as if it were a mere offering to your boundless grace. ā€œDo you desire to take it with me?ā€
ā€œWith you?ā€ you repeated, slipping your hand into his with a smile. ā€œMost certainly.ā€
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yandere-sins Ā· 7 months ago
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IM CRYING AT THE THOUGHT OF KƖNIG NOT LETTING DARLING COOK
No because imagine him approving of your combat skills (if you suck then you wouldn't be a KorTac operator in the first place) and enjoying how well you work with him on the battlefield but he draws the line if you were to get injured from cooking šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­
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Darling, KorTac, and TF141 when Kƶnig refuses to let darling cook but allows her to commit war crimes:
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Darling explaining (begging) to Kƶnig on why he should let her bond with the others like a normal soldier and cook for herself because she's not a child.
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Kƶnig towards anyone who tried getting too close to HIS platonic darling (they made a small talk).
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You're sooo right about Ghost being rougher yet gives his darling more freedom aka the bare minimum. The problem with platonic yandere Kƶnig is that he's infantilizing! Even if he's also friends with Horangi, you and Horangi are treated very differently. Horangi and KorTac pities you, truly.
I thought of something, since the rest of TF141 doesn't know the whole thing about you and Kƶnig, how would you think they'll react towards Kƶnig's treatment towards his darling? The only ones who came to my mind are Price and Ghost. Price who raises an eyebrow because he's not even like that with his men, and Ghost calling Kƶnig out on his treatment that makes you uncomfortable.
Kƶnig is just too afraid something might happen, he totally pulls darling from any missions if he can, but alas, they are more than capable. It also starts out as kind of nice for the darling, I mean, it's great if someone takes care of you for a while, right? But at some point they'll be pretty annoyed for even needing a chaperone to go to the toilet. But of course it's also hard to send Kƶnig away. He only means well after all... Darling will need to put their foot down even if it hurts (':
The 141 probably sees it as a weird co-dependant situation at first. You're like a service pet even though they never saw the "real" and vulnerable Kƶnig, so it makes even less sense. However, things do begin to ring alarm bells when they notice you getting frustrated about things like being sent away whenever you want to make food for yourself and Kƶnig taking over. Or when you don't show up to training. Ghost and Soap are more on the personal front, catching up to you and bumping into your shoulder, asking if you're okay. Price is more of a business front where he orders you to meet him, however, he's still kind when he asks if you need help or if there is something uncanny going on he should know about. They're not really in a position to interfer with KorTac employees, but if you tell them you need a break, they can at least try to get the big guy off your back ever so often. You'll have to do the reporting yourself if you have enough but they can give you the pen and paper or telephone if it's something you'd rather not do in Kƶnig's presence. But then again, do you want to?
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the-possum-writes Ā· 1 year ago
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You may have gotten a request like this already so please ignore it if you have!
I really enjoy your works so far and I'd like to request the nsfw alphabet with Marshall Lee if that's something you'd like to do! Gender neutral or afab anatomy if that's okay but I really don't mind if you keep it fully gender neutral!
I hope this request finds you well and happy! Thank you for your time to read this ask and for sharing your work, it's very enjoyable to read! (It also helps that I adore possums hehe)
[Marshall Lee NS/FW Alphabet]
Tags: NS/FW, mentions of voyeurism, hcs, dirty alphabet
A/n: Thanks for requesting! Ya'll eating good tonight-! This is for the AT version of Marshall, the F&C Marshall would probs have some differences without the whole vampire thing.
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A = Aftercare
Marshall doesn't need sleep so he'll help you clean up asap and lay in bed with you so his low body temperature can help ya cool off, he would also sing you to sleep in compensation if he went too rough on you.
B = Body part
Regarding his partner's, he's fond of your chest. He doesn't breathe so he likes seeing it rise and fall whenever you're panting, and enjoys listeningĀ  to your heartbeat during cuddle sessions.
As for his body, he likes every aspect of it but if he had to choose it would probably be his eyes. They're the first thing someone sees when he's lurking in the dark.
C= Cum
Slick like glue, and lacks any kind of odor or taste (I guess it's because he's a supernatural creature). He doesn't produce an exaggerated amount of cum in a single shot but he's determined enough to fill you up until it's sliding down your thigh, no matter how many rounds it takes.
D= Dirty Secret
Marshall snuck into your house once cause he wanted to gonna prank you by hiding your toothbrush and other stuff but he accidentally floated in on you in a private time and didn't leave until you finished. Nowadays he knocks before visiting you, but there are times where he touched himself to that memory.
E= Experience
Marshall has been around for thousand years, he knows his likes and dislikes regarding stuff done to him, and what he likes in a partner. He's confident in his performance as well, he has skill and learns fast, he knows that he'll find and exploit your weak points that'll have you sobbing in a good way.
F= Favourite Position
The dude can fly, he likes having you cowgirl (or reverse cowgirl) style while on mid air even though you've told him how dangerous it is.
G= Goofy
Though he gets heavily feral most of the time Marshall is a versatile man who can still crack a laugh even at the most heated times, if he's feeling playful and is on a full teasing rampage he'd use wordplay/puns that depend on the location you two are at.
H= Hair
Marshall is well trimmed but not fully shaved, his pubes are just as dark and wavy as his hair. However, sometimes he'd occasionally try to do funny patterns and would walk out of the bathroom bare ass naked and ask. "Does this look like a bat to you?"
I= Intimacy
Okay so we all know Marshall portrays himself as the residential bad boy and everyone buys it, but in reality he keeps his relationships at an arms length since he's lost people close to him. The guy craves intimacy and it's evident in the small affectionate gestures during sex like how he intertwineds his fingers in your hands, and after sex, he's got his legs tangled in yours, plays with your hair and rests his head on your beating chest.
J= Jack Off
In the early years of vampire hunting he couldn't allow himself a single moment of vulnerability even if his hormones were getting the best of him, but in current times in Aaa where he isn't always on guard he wanks it on occasion here and there when he's lacking company. Once he starts dating you he can't help but stoke himself in front of you when you touch yourself for him.
K= Kink
Pray/Predator play:
He loves playing the part so much. On a full moon he will give you a 10 minute headstart to let you run loose through the woods in that white transparent nightgown he likes so much (fits your role as the helpless victim) as he shape shifts into a wolf or a giant bat and hunts you down by the scent of your arousal alone.
Size difference:
Okay hear me out on this- The guy can shape shift, it would be impossible that he wouldn't develop a knack out of it (especially with the prey/predator thing) when he's near you. He gets a thrill out of it when he's in his bat form, slowly diving you down on his shaft until your thighs come in contact with his fur.
Blood kink:
At first he wasn't interested since he had enough fighting those bloodsuckers (and because it's an obvious thing for him to have). So everyday he fought the blood kink allegations but after years of denying it, its become a new curiosity. He doesn't need to drink the stuff to survive but there's something euphoric about yours that tastes better than any shade of crimson, he'd avoid your neck the first few times but would obtain it from you inner thigh, it's like biting into a lovely jelly donut.
Voyeurism:
It's rude to spy on others but Marshall is well known to watch over others regardless if they're aware of it or not, you'd learn it the hard way when he caught sight of you touching yourself in your private time. In recent times you purposely masturbate in front of him as he sits back in a comfy seat but only after kicking his ass for being a creep.
Exhibitionism: He doesn't mind taking things in a public space like a bathroom stall or just outside a party, he already has his initials marked all over Aaa so a quickie is just another way to mark his place as his.
Praise kink: can't get enough when hearing you say how much you love him, how good he feels inside you or the sensation of his mouth all over you.
L= Location
Anywhere, anytime. The only place he refuses to go is the Nightosphere cause his mom has eyes and ear everywhere and those pesky demons would rattle him out and before he know it his mom is asking for grandchildren.
M= Motivation
It takes so little to rile him up but the fastest way is when you're wearing on of his band shirts.
N= NO
Alright hot take. Although he jokes around with it sometimes; Marshall refuses to actually bite your neck with his fangs. Sure he'll nibble on your neck and bite your shoulder but his fangs never really pierce the skin of your jugular, it brings bad memories of his own forceful transformation and how it made him feel.
O= Oral
Appreciates anyone who's brave enough to let his teeth near their privates.
P= Pace
He goes rough and fast, he knows he gets too carried away but he forgets it right away when he sees you enjoy it as much as he does.
Q= Quickie
Doesn't mind them.
R= Risk
Definitely a risk taker. There's many ways to turn him on and he'd love to share them with you, his safe word is probably something like batshit or fries.
S= Stamia
Impecable. Unless you're a supernatural creature you can't match up with his subhuman self.
T= Toy
Marshall likes them both on himself and on his partner, he likes the dildo varities in particular (when he needs to prepare you for his bat form) and how crazy some designs can get.
U= Unfair
Ultimate tease, if you start taunting Marshall he's gonna return it in an instant. Doesn't care if you're out in public he'll get handsy with you as punishment, and dear glob have mercy on you in the bedroom cause he'd edge that bratty attitude out of you.
V= Volume
He isn't as vocal compared to you when he takes the lead, he would mostly let out an occasional hiss or groan intertwined with his dirty talk or teasing. Buuut, if he's the one on the receiving end he'll cry, whine and moan like a bish.
W= Wild Card
If it wasn't because of his vampire regeneration abilities he'd get dick piercings.
X= x-ray
A nice 9 inches long with a slight curve upwards, he's long but a bit on the slender side like most of his body, it's color is just as pale too but halfway it leads to a small dark gray tip.
Y= Yearning
High libido, watch out. Although he doesn't need to eat or sleep he can still feel lust and hunger which become stronger the longer his needs go unfulfilled.
Z= Zzz
He doesn't really sleep much nor does he get exhausted easily, if he's with a mortal partner he'd pretend to sleep just to keep you company or sing/ play a lullaby on his guitar for you.
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403tarot Ā· 1 year ago
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ā«¬ ā«¬ āŠ¹ . . . . WHAT'S STOPPING YOU FROM MEETING YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE?
this is my first general reading. take what resonates with you and leave theĀ rest. close your eyes and take a deep breath to choose the photo that calls you the most. let me know if it resonates to you or give me a feedback through the ask <3
PICK A CARD!
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IF YOU CHOSE THE FIRST CARD ...
You really want to meet someone worth loving. Maybe you've had some frustrating relationships with people who didn't appreciate you or maybe you just dream of having someone to dedicate that romantic song you love so much. You constantly wonder when, where, and how you will meet your future spouse, paying attention to the faces in the crowd and wondering if your love is there. The only thing you're not looking at before entering a relationship is at most important place: within yourself. Your inner self craves the care and affection that you're so willing to give to others but not to yourself.
The universe won't bring someone into your life until you learn to value yourself, take better care of yourself, and do whatever it takes to solve your own problems first. Take care of yourself. Put on nice clothes, fix your hair, wear your best perfume. Do it for yourself. Maybe invite your friends to have fun in a nice place, enjoy the moment, and don't tirelessly search for someone. Enjoy your own company and the company of the people you already have in your life. The universe is not foolish, and what is meant to be yours will come at the right time. You can't expect to love someone else fully if you only love yourself halfway.
cards pulled: the empress, the wheel of fortune, page of swords, 4 of cups, 9 of pents, 2 of pents, 3 of pents, 10 of wands and the devil.
IF YOU CHOSE THE SECOND CARD ...
After many romantic disappointments, you may have wondered if you will ever truly find someone to stand by your side. The past hasn't been easy; there were people who hurt you and made you doubt not only yourself but also whether there is someone in the world capable of loving you. You withdrew and hid from love, but that wasn't enough to make you stop dreaming of a healthy and reciprocal relationship. However, due to these past experiences, you doubt everyone who tries to get close to you and end up pushing them away.
You're afraid that they will see your weaknesses and no longer allow yourself to be vulnerable in front of anyone. While that's a great way to protect yourself, you can't find love by pointing swords at each other's faces. You need to open up emotionally and allow people to get close to you. The universe cannot send your future spouse at a time when you would likely just push them away without even giving them a chance. Consider gradually opening your heart. This doesn't mean you should let just anyone in; on the contrary, be responsible and filter people so that only the right one reaches the depths of your emotions.
cards pulled: three of cups, the moon, 8 of swords, 7 of swords, 8 of pents, 9 of cups, page of pents and 6 of swords.
IF YOU CHOSE THE THIRD CARD ...
It seems that the third picture concentrates the largest number of people who may be your future love just one step away. You have always taken care of others a lot, and it's likely that you are extroverted or have many friendships. You wonder if this whole "romance" thing is really for you because when you stop and think about your situation, not having love doesn't seem so bad. You already have everything you need, including that person you like so much... Love may be right under your nose. That person who is always with you, who makes you feel radiant, who cheers you up even in the toughest moments, that person with whom you are gradually building a relationship of companionship and care.
Open your eyes and your heart. Love doesn't always come suddenly; it can come slowly, with caution, respectfully nestling in your chest. If you have that person, communicate with them and explain your feelings. If by chance that person hasn't entered your life yet, be attentive to new friendships. For you, love is right there, just around the corner.
cards pulled: the sun, 3 of pents, knight of swords, page of wands, 3 of wands, page of cups, 3 of cups
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deck used: the marigold tarot.
you can give suggestions or request personal readings/with an idol of your choice. check my pinned to know more!
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bbieangel Ā· 3 months ago
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Love the Joel fic!!! plsssss do an Arthur cramps one!!!
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Moon Cycle ā€” Arthur Morgan x F!Reader
A/N: I loved writing this! It's my first time writing anything that's not set in the present world so please bare with me <3 And yes, the title is a reference to Melanie Martinez's song :) As always, thank you for your requests and I hope you love it!
Summary: Even when you try to act tough, Arthur Morgan always sees right through you. And, the day you finally allow yourself to feel weak, he's there to help you with your cramps.
Tags: Fluff! A LOT OF FLUFF. High honor Arthur. Self-deprecating Arthur, we all know how he talks to himself. Mentions of his past (Eliza and Mary Linn), reader has a uterus and is menstruating, she doesn't wear the typical clothes that women used in the 1800's (think of it more like Sadie, she dresses like her). This is set before Arthur even knows he's sick.
Word count: 7.8k
Divider by @/peony chance on Pinterest!
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Since day one, you had never failed to amaze the whole Van Der Linde gang with your dirty mouth and ways of pissing off Miss Grimshaw. To say the least, they had grown fond of you. And even if you could look after yourself just fine, you laid awake in your cot endless nights just wishing someone was there for you in times where you felt the most vulnerable, needing attention like the dog the gang had adopted. He always ran around, sniffing everyone and looking for any hand that would give him back scratches.
One particular day you had gone out to rob a stagecoach that a guy in Rhodes had told you about. Dutch assigned you to go along with Arthur, the gruff looking, almost giant man. But you knew he hid something else behind his blue-green eyes that often held a hint of tenderness whenever he looked your way.
"Now, stay right behind me, princess."
He muttered as he covered his face behind the rock you were prompted at, making sure the drivers didn't see you.
You groaned. Of course that, out of all of the women in camp, he would call you princess. But he didn't do it for the reasons you thought.
"Call me by my name, Morgan."
You muttered and he let out a deep chuckle, rumbling through his chest and sending butterflies to your stomach. But you wouldn't let your face show that, after all, you kinda liked being called princess by him.
The stagecoach robbery was a success, feeling like a breath of fresh air after what seemed like the gang had been cursed or just ran out of good luck.
Arthur counted the money effortlessly, the flicking of his fingers looking elegant. It was ridiculous, you thought as he you waited for your part.
"Don't forget to give some to camp, princess."
He said, pointing a finger at you. But he knew not to worry about you contributing to the little box Dutch had beside his tent, he had seen you do it more times than anyone else in the gang.
"You don't need to worry about me contributing, Arthur."
You said with a soft smile as you both rode back to camp, side by side, enjoying the nice weather and the views.
ā€”
Later that day, you were sitting up against a log in front of the campfire. A bead of sweat fell down the side of your face and into your shirt. Arthur was going to tease you about it, but he held himself back when he saw the slight frown on your face and your knees being held against your chest.
He sighed, knowing that caring about you wasn't the best decision. He couldn't bring himself to like anyone else, not after Eliza and Mary. But that soft, empathetic part of him was stronger than any of his insecurities, and it needed to know if you were okay. Which you clearly weren't.
He slowly sat down beside you with a look of concern on his face, and placed his calloused hand on your shoulder.
"You alright, princess? Did you get hurt? You should've told meā€”"
"I didn't get hurt."
You interrupted him. You were about to snap at him for teasing you, but when you looked into his eyes, glowing by the fire crackling in front of you, you noticed he was being genuine. So your expression softened, and he saw it, making his heart flutter and long to open up to you more.
"I'm.. I have cramps. It's that time of the month.."
You spoke quietly. You had grown to know it wasn't okay to talk about it, let alone tell a man about it. They found it disgusting, a woman bleeding monthly was seen almost as a sin, something you couldn't talk about.
But Arthur couldn't care less. He had killed people and had seen countless bodies, massacred by some fool. Hell, he'd seen his son be born. He could handle speaking about a monthly small amount of blood coming out of a woman's body naturally.
"I understand. Is there anything I can do for you?"
He asked, and your eyebrows shot up in surprise. Why wasn't he acting disgusted by what you just said? Why didn't he tell you to just suck it up?
It took you a few seconds to answer.
"Iā€”Uhm.. I don't know, actually. Can you help me get to my tent? I think I might've stained my clothes and I don't wanna get teased about it."
You spoke, your eyes darted towards the fire once again. It was fine if he declined, you would understand. But, once again, he surprised you.
"Yeah, let's go."
He said and wrapped his arm around your shoulder, helping you up. He looked behind his shoulder to make sure no one was paying attention to see the small stain in your pants, and led you to your tent.
"I've heard.."
He cleared his throat before speaking, the slight pink tint on his cheeks gave away the soft embarrassment he felt.
"I've heard that peppermint or chamomile tea helps, the ladies were talking about it the other day."
He said and you couldn't help but smile softly.
"Yeah, it does. I just ran out of both herbes."
At that, he raised an eyebrow. Why didn't you tell him? He would've gone looking for some if it brought you comfort. And, against his better judgement, he chose to speak.
"You should've told me. I'll make sure to bring you some."
He spoke gruffly, but unable to hide his growing softness and tenderness for you.
When he helped you into your cot, he made sure to cover you with a blanket before turning on his heels to go away. He figured you might want to be left alone.
"Wait."
You called out to him. You knew better than to call over a man who wouldn't hesitate to put a bullet between anyone's eyes, but a part of you knew he only did it when absolutely necessary. And that he would never, ever touch a hair on your body.
"Can you.. stay a little while?"
You asked, your cheeks turning a cute rosey shade. At that, he gave you a light chuckle.
"Yeah, 'course."
He sat down on the edge of your cot. You could see the sympathetic look in his eyes when your face would scrunch up every time a cramp hit harder.
"I'm not usually like this, I can take the painā€”"
"No need to explain to me. I know it hurts and I don't need you to act tough all the time."
He cut you off, easing some of the embarrassment you felt. Maybe it was stress, maybe your hormones were fighting against you, but this cycle felt different. It hurt a lot more, making you sweat as you tried to deal with the pain.
The tension between the both of you only continued to grow, hidden desires behind your eyelids that none of you could speak about. Heartbreaks and loss were two things you were too familiar with, and couldn't bring yourself to experience once again.
So he didn't speak as he laid beside you, carefully, treating you as if you were made out of porcelain and he didn't want to hurt you. His hand went to your lower stomach and began moving it gently, massaging the zone.
You let out a sigh of reliefā€”how did he know exactly what to do? As if reading your thoughts, he spoke:
"Mary told me this works. I didn't figure it out on my own."
He spoke quietly, and you felt kinda bad. How could she be such a fool to break up with such a kind man?
"Even if you didn't figure it out on your own, I'm grateful you know about it."
You spoke softly.
"Can I tell you something, Arthur?"
You asked, you heart pounding in your chest as if it wanted out just to be gifted to Arthur.
"'Course, princess."
He responded, his hand never stopped moving as he saw the look of relief in your face. A hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his lips when he noticed it was working.
"You're a good man. And anyone who doesn't see that, is a fool. A damn, blind fool."
You spoke and his eyes widened at that, letting you take in more of the particular color they had. You were so close to him yet none of you could move.
"I ain't much of a good person, princess. I've done things I'm not proud of, killed folks just because.. There's a price on my head."
He said, looking at you with that self-deprecating look he gave anyone who even dared to call him good. He wasn't good, he was a fool who didn't know how to be kind, how to be good. Or at least, that was what he thought of himself.
But on the contrary, you didn't see him that way, and he knew. So you doubled down, going along with your stubborn nature.
"Well, to me you are good. And nothing will change my mind about that."
You spoke in a firmer tone, placing a hand on top of his shoulder and rubbing it softly. He swore you could feel the way his heart jumped at your small gesture.
After a few minutes of just contemplating each other's faces, trying to read each other's minds, he spoke.
"You deserve someone better than me."
At that, you frowned. He couldn't tell you what you deserved and what you didn't, who you could or couldn't like.
"No one has ever cared about my cramps before. No one... No man has taken the time to try and make me feel better."
His expression softened. How could anyone treat you badly about something that wasn't your fault? But again, he reminded himself, it was 1899. You didn't live in a fair world.
"I couldn't just let you be in pain."
"Exactly."
You said. Everything he did or said was just another reason as to why you considered him a good man. After fighting against your fears, your mind, your insecurities, you leaned slightly closer. What were you doing? You didn't know. But the sight of his lips covered by his always perfectly trimmed moustache was something almost magnetic that pulled at your heartstrings right when you were the most vulnerable and needy.
"Princess..."
He tried to protest. His breathing hitched as he felt you slightly closer, his eyes kept darting towards your plush lips without even thinking. His heart thumped against his chest in a way that almost hurt.
"Do you trust me?"
His eyes shot up at yours. Of course he trusted you, even if a part of his brain begged him not to, he wasn't doing what his brain wanted. He was following his heart at this point, and his heart wanted you. Only you.
"I do."
He responded, his deep voice was now soft.
"Then.. Let me."
You whispered and pressed your lips against his, without giving your brain the possibility to make you think about it twice. You stayed still as you waited for him to pull away, to shut you down and never talk to you again.
But he kissed you back. He kissed you back, and his hand tangled on your hair as he did. Every move, every action was so gentle, so careful. And you couldn't be more grateful for that.
His other hand never left your lower stomach. He was determined to end with your cramps, even if his own hand ended up cramping after massaging your skin for so long.
He didn't leave your side that night. If anything, the whole situation only brought the two of you closer, to the point where he would look for excuses to sleep with you all curled up against him. His arm wrapped around your waist, holding your frame up against his chest. All while keeping a soft smile on his face even when he slept.
Because what started with the two of you being scared of letting anyone else in, ended up with Arthur going out of his way to look for anything that would relieve your pain. He would even ride his horse for hours until he found peppermint.
But in the end: all you wanted was the warmth his body provided you with and his hand pressed against your skin.
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adoringmha Ā· 1 year ago
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if you dont mind,can i have baku with a mommy kink?loved your needy bakugou fic,it had me clenching my thiiighsšŸ˜³šŸ„µ
this has literally been in my inbox for 2 years but i was saving it for when i had inspiration. | bakugo x gn!reader (but he calls you mommy) | nsfw !!! minors dni !!! also why is it a little angsty i'm sorry about that sjkfdhg
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thinking of bakugo only letting loose with you, only allowing himself to be that vulnerable when he's with you. he didn't even realize he had that kink until he was settled in his relationship with you, coming to a realization when he noticed how much he loved getting taken care of by you.
he wasn't really used to that. he was brash and blunt and aggressive, and most of all independent. he was always looking out for others, despite his tough approach, not the other way around.
so when you broke down his walls and let him rest his head on your chest, cooing at him that he was your baby and that you'd take care of him, he didn't even know what to do, but he knew he loved it. a lot. maybe too much.
but sometimes, he doesn't feel like he's deserving of that nurturing affection. so he's a little rougher on the exterior, even though inside he's dying for your soft touch and words. especially on those days where he feels he didn't do his best at work. he wasn't fast enough, he was too sloppy, someone could have gotten hurt, etc.
he tries to push you away (it's bad he knows, but he can't control it), giving you curt responses, not looking you in the eye, cause he knows once he does, he'll want to melt into you completely.
so he makes you work for it a little bit, unintentionally though, cause in his mind, he's the one that has to work for it, to earn it.
"katsu c'mere." your voice is soft, beckoning him over like a siren, and he literally clenches his fists and his jaw to refuse.
"m'busy." he goes into the kitchen, letting out a tense breath.
he gets a bottle of water from the fridge and places it in front of him on the counter, leaning forward on both his hands, going completely stiff when he feels your arms slide around his middle, too caught up in his head to even hear your footsteps.
"that wasn't very nice, baby."
he both loves and hates how your words send a thrill through his body, how you already have him in your clutches.
you're not mean to him, not with your voice anyway. that's the distinct difference between you two, you're not rough, you're always soft, even when he thinks he doesn't deserve it. and it makes him feel like shit sometimes. like he doesn't deserve you. but he won't say it, he can't. because what if once he says it out loud, you realize he's right and you leave him?
he doesn't think he deserves you, no. but he's too selfish to let you go.
he's brought back to the moment when your hands slide up and down his torso. you smell good, and your soft pressed up against him, he can barely think straight, already feeling himself slip through the cracks.
he doesn't respond but you know what's wrong with him.
"rough day?" you don't expect a response, so you simply press a few kisses on his back, feeling him loosen up with each press of your lips, and smile to yourself. you're sure he can feel it, but he doesn't seem to mind.
"let me see you." your voice is warm, tempting, but he still hesitates, only slightly straightening up.
"come on, baby." you squeeze him lightly before stepping back, immediately making him miss your warmth.
he turns to face you like you pulled him, and you did really, just not physically. his gaze is on the floor, but you're having none of that.
you step closer to him until you're pressed against him, your hands on his waist, and you can see the veins in his arms from how hard he's holding back, his hands in his pockets, itching to touch you.
you slide your hands up to his chest slowly. "can you look up for me?" he takes a second, but once he does, you smiles at him, luring him further into your hold. you have his heart right in the palms of your hands.
"take a deep breath with me." you nod at him, tempting him to follow your lead and he does, eyes roaming over your face like he still can't believe you're here, with him, for him. just looking at you has him feeling a thousand times better than when he walked in.
you smile even wider when he breathes with you. "good, baby."
you raise your arms, not even trying to reach his face, knowing he's far too tall, and he follows the silent request, leaning down so he's at your height. your hands hold his face gently and his eyes flutter shut for a moment before looking back at you, his gaze much softer than before, like a switch was flipped.
you kiss him and he whimpers, hands finally coming to touch you, arms wrapped around your torso like he's never letting you go. he lets you take the lead, letting you consume him wholeheartedly.
you pull back to let the both of you take a breath, knowing katsuki would rather reach his last breath then pull away from you. "m'here, yeah? i've got you." you notice his eyes are a little glazed over and slightly glassy right before he buries his face in your neck, inhaling your scent and holding you tight.
his voice is muffled and he mumbles but you make out the words against your shoulder. "m'sorry mommy."
you hold him tighter, wanting to hold him together. "it's okay baby, you're okay. let me take care of you, yeah?"
and when you're both finally in bed, him on his back fully nude, hands on your thighs as you sit on top of him still in your underwear, he's looking up at you like you're the moon and stars, moaning when you grind against him.
you slide one hand up his chest, the other holding the side of his face, leaning in close so your lips graze his and his hips buck up into you, making you smirk. "i'll take good care of you, baby. promise."
he nods before you even finish your sentence, completely in your control. "please."
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speedycoffeedelight Ā· 6 months ago
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An Animalistic Disaster
CH-19 : A Deer Vs Wolves
Masterlist
Summery :Where you get your ass saved from being almost killed.
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*Some time after you left*
Alastor and Niffty was sitting outside the cabin, lazily enjoying each others company. Niffty had turned into a human and leaned against Alastor's body. Alastor, even though he hated dogs,he has learned to at least tolerate Niffty's presence. That doesn't mean he allowed her to stay close to him in her full dog form. That form irked him.
"Hey Alastor.." Niffty finally broke the silence. "Do you think you'll ever transform?"
'Of course I will. Why would you doubt that?'
"Because what if you don't like (Y/n) ever? You need to like her so you can be human again."
Alastor scoffed and looked away. ' Don't you worry your little head about it. I will find a way somehow. I am the radio demon after all.'
Niffty still wasn't convinced as she looked into the distance again. "You know, she's likes you a lot! We talk about you sometimes."
That got his attention. He turned his head towards Niffty again. 'What did you guys talk about? It better not be something to tarnish my reputation my dear!'
" That's girl's talk silly. I can't tell you that! " Niffty chuckled with both hands covering her mouth. Alastor rolled his eyes at such a display ."But I can tell that she really likes you."
'We know that already. That isn't something new. I'm used to ladies fawning over me.' Alastor thought back to his time as a human in the 19's. Indeed, despite his colour back then, women would throw themselves at him nonchalantly. It was both a blessing and a curse for him. Blessing since it helped his popularity grow, curse since he hated those type of contacts. This lowered a lot after he became an overlord. People were far to afraid to approach him then.
"Yes but she's different. She might like you but she'll never push herself onto you. You're rumoured to be asexual and she respects that."
'I'm a what now?'
"Asexual!" Niffty repeated herself. "Don't you know what it is?"
'I'm afraid not dear. Is it one of those modern slangs?'
"Of course not! Let me explain what it is then."
And thus Niffty spent almost an hour and a halfĀ explaining different types of sexualities to him, including asexuality. It took a lot of tries to get Alastor to properly understand the concept.
' So you mean to say, that it's normal to not want to engage in such activities? My, all this time I thought I just hadn't found the right girl for me to have those desires. Or worse, there was something wrong with me...' Alastor's smile faltered a bit. It was crazy how times had changed. Normally he didn't like such changes but this was one of the better ones.
'Of course, not that I mind about having something wrong within me. Haha! I am a serial killer after all.' His smile came back as quickly as it disappeared, not wanting to seem vulnerable in front of someone. He supposed he could admire your respect about his boundaries too. Unlike those other girls in his past, you actually cared to make him comfortable, no matter how much you liked him. It made him feel a bit....warm inside.
He spent the next few hours just chatting with Niffty. As sun began to set, Vaggie came over to the pair.
"Hey, (Y/n) hasn't returned yet. It's already getting late. She said she'd be back before sunset. Have any of you guys seen her?"
Niffty and Alastor looked at each other and shook their head. "No...we haven't. We've just been chatting here all afternoon." Vaggie sighed, worry immenent in her face. "I see... sorry for bothering you then."
As Vaggie went back to the cabin, she couldn't help but think about what might have happened to you. You were an adult human. You could handle a night out yourself. Still worries begun to rush in one after another.
"Alastor...you don't think something happened to her do you?" Before Alastor could reply, a howl broke through the night. Both Niffty and Alastor's ears perked up. A blue light caught in the corner of their eyes. Whipping their head towards it, they strangely found a bright blue butterfly that was seemingly glowing in the dark.
Just like you before, they couldn't help but follow it. It felt like it was the right course of action. Though they couldn't tell why. They began to chase after the butterfly at full speed as it was rushing through the forest. Niffty had already transformed into her dog form to run faster.
Soon Niffty picked up scent of something. It was blood. There a familiar scent with it. Your scent.
Niffty's eyes widened with the realization as she shouted at Alastor to let him know. Soon enough, they were able to hear faint growls, snarls from distant. What really made their heart almost stop was the low moaning of you.
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You tried. You really tried to hold on by yourself as long as you could while trying to find find a way to escape. You picked up a nearby branch you found to defend against this horde of wolf that were dead set on eating you.
But there were only much you can do. After some time, you were bleeding all over, barely standing. A wolf's claw teared a big slash on your back. Another one almost teared your leg off before you gave it a good punch. There were small scratchs and bite marks all over. The blood coming out from all over your body was starting to harden on your clothes.
It was hurting to stand already as your body reached it's limit. You collapsed on your knees as the bloody branch you were holding fell down with a thud. You couldn't do this, not anymore. It all hurt too much. You felt tears pricking at your eyes as you thought of your inevitable death. Would there even be anything left of your body after these wolves finished eating you? How much would it...hurt?
A wolf jumped on you, teeths bared to finally consume your sweet flesh. It's teeth were only a few inches above your face as you closed you eyes. Suddenly something small but fierce jumped onto its neck from a side and bit onto it, pushing it to the ground. A sickening crunch followed soon after.
You opened your eyes warrily a little. Your vision was still blurry so you couldn't see clearly. Judging by the sound of the small thing...it was probably a dog. It looked back at you and transformed.
"(Y/n)!.......okay?? We'll...out..here.."
You couldn't hear her words clearly. You saw a big black figure rush through and stand in front of you protectively while facing the wolfs. Did they come to protect you? If so, you could rest a little right? You finally collapsed and shut your eyes.
Your head fell down on Niffty's lap as she shook you to keep you awake. 'Niffty my dear! Focus on protecting (Y/n) and getting her back to the cabin. I'll deal with the wolves!'
Alastor shouted out while looking forward at the canines. It was clear the wolves remembered him just as he did, increasing their anger tenfold. His consciousness was shouting at him to run. He doesn't need to do this. You weren't worth risking his life for. But against his better judgement he was still standing here, between you and these vicious animals.
One of the wolfs lunged forward as he quickly moved out of the way and pierced it with his antlers. But another one quickly followed and bit behind him. He kicked it off him as fresh trail of blood flew from his body.
"Alastor! Her conditions getting worse!" Niffty said screaming. "She'll die if we don't do something about it!"
Alastor knew that already. Niffty didn't have to spell it out for him to know how dire your situation is. He only gritted his teeth. No matter how much he thought, he couldn't think of a way out. It seemed like you understood that as well.
"L..eave..me..go.."
You choked out with the last of your breath before blacking out. Alastor pulled his ears back. You remained ever the good girl till your last drop of consciousness. Always sacrificing yourself for others sake. How admiring....
It's not like that thought didn't cross his mind. Leaving you here should be the wise course of action here. Yet why did did he feel so....bad? Is it because he lived with you all this time? Or when he saw how careful you are with touching him when you were stitching? Or the things Niffty told him about you this afternoon? He wasn't sure. He knew if he returned without you, everyone would shun him out.
"Haha...." He chuckled bitterly at himself. Perhaps you have began to make an effect on him. Whatever happens, he decided,
He was going to stay by your side.
Golden light shone brightly along his body, blinding the wolves that were about to approach him. Alastor looked at his hands. "Finally... about time..."
Suddenly a familiar blue light shone in the corner of Niffty's eyes. Turning her head towards it she saw the butterfly again. It was sitting on top of a carcass. Wait no, it was sitting on top of a handle. A handle that sparkled brightly from the moonlight radiating of it now. It was (Y/n)'s knife, Niffty recognised.
Looking around, when she saw no wolves close by she chased to it. The butterfly flew away again into the distance as she arrived. Niffty picked up the knife in a swift motion. "Alastor! Catch!"
Alastor eye's darted towards Niffty's voice that wasn't behind him anymore. He was about to scold her for leaving you alone but held his tongue when he saw the sparkle of a knife shine in her hands before she threw it at him. He caught it effortlessly in his right hand. As soon as she threw it, she ran back to you and scratched at a wolf that was threatening to come too close for comfort while growling.
Alastor was bleeding from his forehead and multiple gashes from all over his body. But he felt newfound strength flow through him as soon as he held the knife. Ah, he missed this, this thrill of the hunt. He had a crazed expression on his face as he looked over at the wolves standing before him now. The ears on his head perked up as it sensed a wolf coming in closer. Just as it launched he moved out of the way and cut a big slash across it's neck and kicked it away. The wolf's now limp and dead body fell onto the ground beside you and Niffty.
"Come on, it's time to play, puppies..."
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On the other hand, everyone was worried sick at the cabin. Angel found the bag you left at the edge of the forest and brought it home.
"What if something bad happened to her... Vaggie I'm scared!"
"Clam down toots! I'm sure she's fine.... probably..." Angel looked away, not being convinced by his very own statement.
"We cannot find Alastor and Niffty either. If Niffty was here, maybe she could have sniffed (Y/n) out." Pentious pointed at his nose. Husk took a gulp of orange juice you had since alcohol was gone. You really needed to stock up on some alcohol.
"What if we all go find 'er?" Cherri proposed. "She should be around somewhere here right? Since her bag was found close, she should be close as well."
"We... could do that...but what if we get lost? It'll take forever for everyone to get back together again." Vaggie looked at everyone present. "But it'll be our last choice, if she or Alastor or Niffty doesn't come back within half an hour. We're going out."
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The fight was going much better then before. Alastor easily transformed between deer and human befitting of the situation. He could stab a wolf with a knife and then toss it in the air and kick another in its shin after transforming. Then again collect the knife after becoming human. It was fun.
But this couldn't go on forever. He knew that from the fatigue coursing through his body. He had to end this quickly while the adrenaline was still present. After some more slashes and stomps, he remained the only one standing in a field of fresh corpses.
He didn't have time to celebrate his victory. As soon as the last wolf was down, he quickly returned to you. The black stripes of his dress has been painted red with both his blood and the animals. He crouched down to inspect your pulse. It was weak, but you still had it. Alastor let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding.
Alastor put the knife away in his pocket. He softly picked you up in his arms, careful not to put too much pressure on the cuts of your body. His own body was hurting severely, but he needed to be strong for your sake.
"Niffty, run back to the cabin and tell Vaggie to come immediately. And also bring someone to help carry her quickly. I'll be right behind you."
Niffty nodded her head and began sprinting towards your cabin. Alastor looked at your face with a soft gaze. He leaned down and whispered, "Stay strong my dear. You'll be fine, I promise.." With a final breath he began heading towards the cabin as moonlight shone on both of you.
Perhaps because he was so caught up to save you, he didn't notice a pair eyes watching the whole thing.
"Interesting...."
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By the time Niffty reached the cabin, she found all of them standing outside, ready to depart in search of you. Their eyes widened seeing Niffty with blood on her dress.
"NIFFTY WHAT HAPPENED??"
It didn't take long enough for Vaggie to reach Alastor with Niffty alongside to guide her. Alastor gave a small smile towards the crowd as they collectively gasped seeing the both of you. Without wasting a moment, you were transferred on the back of Husk as Vaggie cast her healing. Alastor was about to fall down but Pentious caught him just in time.
"Hang onto me!" Pentious took one of Alastor's hands and slid it over his shoulder to support him. Vaggie kept casting her healing all the way to the cabin as Charlie started to cry. You were placed in your room with Vaggie, Charlie and Cherri. They changed your bloody cloths and cleaned you up first. Only then the boys were allowed to come.
Alastor on the other hand was placed on the lounge in the other room with only Niffty and Husk. Niffty sew up all the cuts and scratches he had and Husk just stood in a corner watching. Alastor wasn't comfortable with showing anyone else his bare body.
After that was done Alastor laid down on the lounge with a cover on his body as Angel walked in and popped next to him sighing and started a smoke.
" How's....(Y/n)?" Alastor found himself asking while looking at the ceiling. He didn't want to appear too worried for you, yet he could help but be anxious. " She'll live. Vaggie's doin all she can to save her." Angel took a drag of his cigarette and blew the smoke. "But what exactly happened? Why was she in that forest and how did you two find her?"
Alastor and Niffty began to tell their tale from when they found the butterfly to Niffty seeing the butterfly on the knife to Alastor carrying you. He skipped the part of his determination to protect you though. But he greatly told the tale of him slaughtering the wolves with great detail that left Angel's stomach turning.
" That butterfly...do ya think it could be a demon like us?"
"It's very much possible. It certainly wasn't any normal butterfly. But how did it gain the power to control us? I don't think any of us had any power like that."
" What if it's something entirely different from us? " Niffty jumped in.
" That would certainly explain this phenomenon. Though we can't really be sure. To know about it properly we need that butterfly. But that isn't a safe choice considering what happened today. "
A silence befell the room once again as Cherri slipped into the room. She took a sit next to Angel. "Vaggie's working her magic right now. If she wasn't here, not sure what woulda happened to her."
" Yeah...also smiles, ya transformed..." Angel said with a toothed grin looking back at him. He had deep curly brown hair and light brown skin. Two fluffy deer ears stayed atop his head. His glasses which were drowning in blood when they first saw him was cleaned again and sitting on his face. Plus Angel could swear he saw a brown tail poking out from behind Alastor's dress when Pentious carried him back.
Alastor's amber coloured eyes scanned Angel's face. He knew exactly what Angel was trying to get at.
" So ya do have feelings for-"
" None of that! "
" But you needed to have intense feelings
Ā  to transform ~"
" I merely wished to protect her that's
all. If I came without her you all would have scorned me."
" Same thing!"
With Alastor transforming, it meant the whole crew was human once again. Things should be a lot easier now.
" Also...does (Y/n) know about this? That
Ā  we need to have feelings for her to
Ā  transform? "
" Obviously not. We all collectively agreed to keep this a secret from her."
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The night went by rather quickly. Before Alastor knew it, he was falling asleep. The fatigue and the effects of blood loss finally caught up to him.
You opened your eyes the next day at afternoon. The first thing you realised that almost every part of you hurt. With a huff and a grunt you pushed yourself up a bit. Vaggie was sleeping lying her head on the bed and and her hands on your torso. Charlie was asleep on the desk on the other side of the room. Angel came in with a plate of food and he let out a scream seeing you awake. He quickly put the food down on the table and rushed to you.
Apparently Vaggie has been healing you nonstop throughout the night, she pushed her body to her limit and passed out around the morning . Charlie was the same, she used her ability to smoothly clean your cuts and remove branches stuck to you. Your eyes widened hearing about Alastor.
" Alastor? Where is he?"
" He's fine, he's in the other room. Do you want me to call him to you?"
" Yes, him and everyone else. I want to know what exactly happened..."
Alastor wore one of Pentious's shirt's for now. He and others soon joined in your room. You made sure to talk quietly so you didn't wake up the sleeping girls. They deserve to rest.
"That butterfly....that damn butterfly is the reason behind all this.."
"But I don't understand one thing." Pentious looked lost in throught with a hand on his chin. "Why would that butterfly bring you both to danger and then help you fight back?"
"To know that we need to be in contact with it. But there's no need to rush considering what happened."
You sighed loudly, all that matters that all of you were still in one piece. You'll have to take a few days off from your work to recover. You'll ask your colleague to cover for you. He owes you one anyway for the time you secured him a date with his crush.
That being said, you finally looked at Alastor properly. This guy was handsome as fuck. His brown locks fell onto his bandaged forehead in a lazy manner. HisĀ honey eyes locked into yours as he felt you staring at him. You quickly averted your gaze, but you knew that he knew you were staring. A smirk formed on his face as he leaned in close to you.
"Don't I get a thank you for saving you back there, my darling?"
You let out a small yelp and whipped your head towards him. Then again backed your face away when you found his face inches apart from yours. When did he get so damn close?
"Yes uh, thank you..for saving me back there."
Alastor's grin just got wider seeing your flustered expression. He booped your nose as you blinked in confusion.
"Dear don't think I forgot all the things you did and said when I was stuck as a deer. I promise to pay back every.last.bit."
You couldn't help but gulp in the way he said it. Plus the intensity of his stare just added to this making you feel like fainting for the second time now. Just what did you get yourself into?
"Yeah, smiles ya gotta back up a bit. If Vaggie was awake she'd chew your ass up."
"Don't worry, I won't bother her too much. Rest assured my friend."
Something clicked into you just then. Today's the day you've been waiting for a long time. Hazbin hotel season one has officially been released!
"Guys, wake Charlie and Vaggie up again! We have your future to watch!"
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A.n: Sorry for the long wait. College has been straining all my energy and will to live (ā ć£ā Ė˜Ģ©ā ā•­ā ā•®ā Ė˜Ģ©ā )ā ć£
This was one of the main scenarios that has been on my mind since the beginning of the fanfic. I had to start writing a whole ass story to make it understandable lol.
Also guys! GUYS!! I GOT FANARTS!!! LOOK AT THIS!!
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These two were the first ones that got sent. It's Vox as the blue butterfly. Man I love his suit šŸ« šŸ« 
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The second was this, our two girls!! Charlie and Vaggie both in their animal and human forms!! Also there's our first ever transformation moment~
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Y'all remember the iconic moment of Husk putting on our shirt? šŸ„¹šŸ„¹ They drew this!!! And there's our cutiepie Niffty and Mr. Precious!!
Man I can't believe my silly little fanfic inspired someone to draw fanarts!!! God I was so thrilled!! All of these wonderful fanrts are drawn by @/ Little_Wonders7 (twitter) @littlewonders7 (Tumblr) thank you again!!!
As for who the butterfly actually is....I think this will disappoint a lot of you..
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Yes, tis I, your own author. Or the Hazbinfication animal of your author. I couldn't think of any way to bring reader back to the forest where the transformation was supposed to take place. So I forced a reason by placing myself there.(ā ā€¢ā Ā ā ā–½ā Ā ā ā€¢ā ;ā )
This conversation is a thought I had while putting myself there so I decided to draw it.
A clue about this was on my twitter account where there's a blue butterfly on my pinned plus my profile. Shout-out to "sdsblogmainblog" to be the only one to get it!! I feel sorry to everyone who came up with cool theories on who the butterfly could be (ā ļ¼›ā ^ā Ļ‰ā ^ā ļ¼‰
Also no, the pair of eyes watching Alastor and reader was not the butterfly and DW I won't interfere in the story much.
And the winner of the voting issss
šŸŽŠVOXšŸŽŠ
Vox had 27 votes on wattpad
0 votes on Tumblr
11 votes on ao3
Total - 38
Velvette had 12 votes on wattpad
3 votes on Tumblr
16 votes on ao3
Total - 31
I wrote "Your vote has been counted" on the votes I collected. So if you guys want, you can recheck. And I'll explain the requirements of a new character arriving in our world in the next chapter since this is already getting long (ā ā€¢ā Ā ā ā–½ā Ā ā ā€¢ā ;ā )
Also towards people who are sad velvette lost. I only asked who'll be in the harem, not who'll come into this world. And this goes for every single character. Take this how you will.
Stay tuned folks~
Tag list: @legostars @glowinthedarkbones1150 @darifes @aria-tempest @rainbowcake1212 @luxylucylou
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finniestoncrane Ā· 1 year ago
Note
What's a kink of each of the riddlers that you feel like you haven't really talked about?
More Riddler Kinks
Riddler Headcanons hooray, finally getting round to this one after the event!! it's a long one too oops... ok i am got INTO this. some of them i think i've mentioned before but i am so glad to put my silly little thoughts into more detail šŸ’š request info ā€¢ prompt list ā€¢ send me a request ā€¢ kofi ā€¢ masterlist minors DNI!! šŸ”ž cw: so many potentially triggering kinks here, cnc, piss, free use, roleplay, rough sex, violence, monster fucking, nude photography
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dano
i have written about it a LOT but he definitely has a thing for cnc/rape play
and with him, it comes from a space of feeling like he's not good enough, and follows his life's trajectory of having to take things he wants rather than wait patiently for them to come to him
he wants to be in control of a situation, something he's never had before in any aspect of life
something that allows him to feel like he's in charge, that he's got the power
and at the same time, it's so emotionally fulfilling for him to be trusted by someone to that extent
to know a partner is willing to allow themselves to be so vulnerable around him, to get to be so close and intimate with someone
to feel like he's someone you have actively chosen to trust and let him take part in something like that
and to speak to him like an intelligent adult while you cover rules and boundaries and safe-words
that's so healing for him to experience, and it only amplifies his sweet and adoring behaviour outside of your more intense bedroom sessions
plus, any excuse to offer you the most satisfactorily sickeningly sweet aftercare, that's what he's really after
arkham
i play with this man like he's a fucking doll honestly there's not a kink i wouldn't give him, but allow me to delve into my most recent fixation
because i'm giving him a piss kink and no one can stop me
i don't think it's so much about the piss for him, more about the mess and the sense of control over someone's behaviours and habits
definitely about the embarrassment and humiliation
because the minute you let yourself go, the minute you're vulnerable standing or sitting in front of him
bound by his rules to not interrupt him for bathroom breaks
knowing that any mess you make is your own fault
that's when he gets his kicks
and the ability to chastise and degrade you for making a mess of yourself and having very little self-control is an added benefit
telling you how ashamed you should be, while you can see the smug smile on his face and the growing tent at the front of his stupid cargo pants
i don't think he'd piss in you or on you though. as messy as he is i think even he knows standards of good practice when it comes to germs and such
(he's filthy, yes, but very picky over certain textures and substances, it's the autism)
plus the act of him defiling you would be too much, since this idiot harbours intense feelings of admiration and respect that he's too scared or embarrassed to admit to
gotham
i don't think i've gone into too much detail about his medical fetish, but he definitely has one
i mean, i did write that thing on the autopsy table... but anyway!
definitely veering towards the experimental side of medical roleplay
he'll get all of the correct gear on, nothing inherently sexual about it unless you're into that kind of thing
protective gear though, a smock, rubber gloves, maybe a mask
and you'll be expected to be fully nude, all of you exposed to him so that he can test the limits of each part of you
see how every square inch of your skin reacts to his touch
or to his various 'tools' that he's got, sterilised and prepared to work on you
there's no medical benefits to this, he's not aiming to fix you
but he is definitely good at making you feel much, much better than you did before you were laid down on his table
teased, torturous edging, new experiences and toys
until you're a shuddering mess, ready to be eased up for some aftercare before he cleans up for your next appointment
his desire to study you, to see what makes you tick and what makes you make the sweetest sounds is what motivates him here
and he will take rigorous and extensive notes during and afterwards
and then study them in his down time (or alone time)
telltale
corruption, for sure. like his whole personality revolves around being the best and greatest manipulator and schemer that ever was
so corrupting your innocence, real or roleplayed, gives him everything he wants from a sexual encounter
and in a relationship
it's not like he's 24/7 on with the whole "i am your master" thing
but it leeches into everyday life easily enough when you spend a lot of time in his company
any roleplay scenario where he can play an authoritative character while you are a weaker, more innocent position works for him
professor and student, master and servant, he's not beyond playing god and having you pretend to be a nun either, and there are more taboo pairings he's willing to try
there's often elements of bondage, dominance, spirit breaking, orgasm control
anything where he has the higher ground
and he can teach you and show you new and exciting, or scary, things
having you beg to show him the correct ways, to educate you, to give you a new experience, to touch you in a way no one else has
that's what gets him off for sure
twojar
100% is into breeding, and definitely barebacking
the idea of fucking you completely raw (pending your health checks. he's completely clean and fine, but you on the other hand... he needs the documents)
that's what he's most into, especially if he can incorporate some other kinks into the foreplay or actual sex
and then have the grand finale be painting your insides with his cum, letting you feel the warmth of him
but it has to end with you under him, whichever position you prefer the most he's not fussy
with his cock buried deep inside of you
cumming inside of you and holding himself there, keeping you pinned to him
thrusting a couple more times for good measure so he can be sure he's pumped his seed as deep as it can go
and holding you afterwards, telling you how good you took him
his perfect little breeding stock, his sweet little cumdump
filled up and ready to bear the fruits of his labour
btaa
there is no doubt in my mind that every waking minute that he isn't spending on schemes or building his little gadgets
is spent playing fantasy roleplay games, of any kind, on any platform, alone or in groups
he's a huge nerd! it's one of those things that he'll never outlive, once a big dweeb, always a big dweeb
so a big thing for him is roleplay, and specifically, roleplay where he can involve some monster fucking
he can either play the hero, slaying the beast and then saving the girl, who promptly rewards him with herself to use
or being the hero who sets out to defeat the creature and instead ends up fucking it
or let him be the monster and he'll show you how monstrous he could really be
as long as it involves preparation, dramatic reactions, practice and rehearsing, preferably a script with some room for improv
and, of course, the most extravagant and detailed costumes (accurate to the scenario or time period, obviously)
then he will be a very happy, and satisfied, boy
zero year
i haven't really talked about this but it's a huge one for me personally with him
but i think he's a big fan of free use obviously like he just screams it
loves nothing more than a sort of semi-permanent situation where you spend days completely naked and at his mercy
and add a bit of roleplay into it, maybe you're his live-in housekeeper
cleaning for him, cooking for him, washing him, feeding him
and whenever he feels like it, he can stick his dick in you
but you can't react to him unless he gives you permission
you gotta stand there, kneel there, sit there, lay there while he fucks you without making any sounds
and comitting to whatever task you were in the middle of when he decided to start going at you
i just think it would absolutely send him to the moon to know that when you're walking around naked, bending over in front of him
hanging on his every word and obeying his every command
he could also just decide to press his cock inside of you nonchalantly
unburied
he's literally devoutly into cuckoldery, but he's the bull
imagine watching your partner get railed by some ineffectual dweeb with a penchant for riddles
knowing that he's giving it to them with all he's got, making them scream in pleasure and shout out his name
making eye contact with him at some point
and having him wink at you? stick his tongue out? give you some finger guns?
all with the most smug, self-satisfied grin you've ever seen on a human being
and then to top it off, he's calling out sex-themed riddles?
and laughing at you when you don't get them right?
that's not something you can come back from
that changes someone, on several deep levels
and truthfully, that's the part that he likes the most
the emotional scarring on your ego, and the little stroke his gets
knowing he's so annoying that he's unforgettable, which would be the biggest crime to him
btas
i have these ideas about him that always revolve around something artsy or classy
and while i think he would be into some dorky roleplay (he's definitely pretending to be a minotaur, sorry)
i do, selfishly i suppose, think that he would be into body worshipping
specifically in the form of erotic photography
he'd be keen to take pictures of you, in poses, costumes, scenarios, roleplays
directing you, encouraging you, watching you loosen up and let yourself go
whatever you were comfortable with, that's key here
and he'd cherish seeing your face afterwards when he showed you the final products
knowing he'd captured everything about you that he loves and finds attractive
pictures that he'll keep if you want, or destroy
it doesn't matter to him in the end really
he takes them because he thinks of you as his muse, the act of photographing you, of being allowed the vulnerability
to create with you in mind
that's what he finds most erotic and exciting and ultimately, an expression of his love and adoration for you
young justice
if you managed to get him to find the courage to admit to it, you'd learn his favourite thing is uh...
well... just because it plays into his... awkwardness, and shyness, and inexperience...
just... it makes sense that he has a virginity kink
but interestingly, it goes both ways
while he's so keen to have you show him the moves, and pretend to be inducting him into your little black book
teaching him how to touch you or how to move his hips
he's equally interested in switching the roles up a bit
it's a challenge for him, sure, but he's the riddler! there's no challenge he can't live up to
even if that means weeks of practice and lessons with an acting coach to get past the initial nerves
it would all be worth it to pretend that he was confident, dominant, and knew what he was doing
that and the satisfaction of taking something from you, something important
the honour in knowing he's your first (or at least pretending)
and the lasting impression he might have on you for that
that's the kind of idea that has him rutting into you like a fuckin beast
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melanieph321 Ā· 5 months ago
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HIIIIIšŸ’˜šŸ’˜ could you please do some JoÅ”ko Gvardiol ones? I don't really see too many of them and considering I love your writing and the previous ones ypu've done I would love to see some more. Much love xxā¤ļøā¤ļø
Of course! ā¤ļø
JoŔko Gvardiol x Reader - Vunrable
+18
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Summary - JoŔko gets freaked out after Reader starts to bleed after a night together.
Enjoy!
Your relationship was fairly new, meaningĀ  you had never seen JoÅ”ko look so terrified before. But as he got off of you and the lights came on in his bedroom, there he stood, eyes wide at the sight of you. At the sight of what he had done to you.
"I don't know...?" You stammered, quite shook yourself. "This has never happened before, at least not since I was in high school."
"So you're not a virgin?"
"No, of course not."
"Then why are you bleeding?"
"I..." You had no idea. You sat in the pool of it, blood. Not period blood. You were obviously on the pill since you started seeing JoŔko. It was the one thing he requested of you, other than that he didn't have demands on what happened between you in the bedroom. It was very spontaneous, your sex life. The most exciting one you've ever had. Seeing JoŔko like this, with terror in his eyes, felt like the end of your sex life as it was now. How sad, since this was the first night that the two of you had gone all the way. It had taken time, earning each other's trust, especially JoŔko's, who for many reasons felt hesitant to engage in a sexual relationship with a woman like you. Someone who wasn't famous.
"I think it's normal...." You said, hands nipping at the sheets. "You're obviously bigger than most guys I've been with, and tonight when we...."
"It's not normal." JoŔko said, and seemed not to want recall the events of tonight. How he had your face pressed to the mattress, silencing your moans as he fucked you from behind. Or how he had you ride him with your breasts slapping across his face, the ultimate position before flipping you over to lay beneath him. It was during missionary that your troubles began. JoŔko held your gaze while pushing himself into you. He stroked your hair and kissed you gently, allowing himself and you to be more vulnerable than usual. "Fuck, I could do this forever." He whispered. But unfortunately that's when you felt the sharp pain between your legs.
"JoŔko, please. It's not like it hurts now when you're not inside of me."
"Well, what about the future?" He hissed. "Does this mean that I can't fuck you the way I want? I'm sorry Y/N, but you should have told me about your inexperience with men. Even if I'm not your first you obviously haven't been with many."
"And that is a bad thing?" You felt naked. Although your clothes had come off hours ago, this was the first time you actually felt the vunrability of being naked in front of a man.
"I don't know if I can do this?" JoŔko said, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Fine. I'll clean myself up and get out of your way."
"Y/N, that's not..."
You got out of bed and headed towards the bathroom. JoŔko tried grabbing your arm but you shrugged his away. Once in the shower you cried with the running water. You asked yourself why men had to be so stupidly sure of themselves in a way that stopped the from being vunrable? Vunrability is what could cure the unrealistic expectations that they had of the world and the women in it. But perhaps there was no desire.
"Y/N, please, stay."
You hopped out of the shower, eyes bloodshot from crying. JoŔko was sitting on the edge of his bed where new sheets had been swapped from the old once that you stained. He grabbed your arm as you passed him on your way to put on your clothes.
"You're obviously free to leave, but please help me make this right." He brought the back of your hand to his mouth, kissing it gently. "I'm sorry."
"For what?" You looked down on him unconvinced that he even understood where he had gone wrong.
He looked up at you with your hand still pressed against his lips. "For what I said and how made you feel." He nodded. "I was a bit freaked out, yes. But it's not an excuse to say the things that I said."
"And?"
His brows lifted. "And?"
"Yes, and?" You were not satisfied with his apology, certainly not after your cry session in the shower.
"Please Y/N, I'm not very good at this. I'm obviously terrible. All I know is that I want you in my bed. I want you to feel safe being intimate with me. When I saw you bleeding it was like a nightmare come true. I saw myself as a monster that...."
You silence him with a kiss. A kiss that lingered until a need to catch your breaths.
"You're not a monster." You're forhead knocked against his.
"I am a monster for questioning you instead of taking care of you right away."
Your hands went to his face, his beard scruffy beaneath your palms. "Take care of me now."
His arms cradled around your naked body, pulling you down to lay with him in bed. You picked up where you left off, with JoŔko stroking your hair and kissing you gently, allowing the two of you to be vulnerable again.
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ephemeral--dreams Ā· 2 years ago
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Clingy, sleepy s/o - Nikolai, Yosano, Chuuya
ā˜† ā˜¾ ā˜† ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€ā”€
Nikolai
Usually, he's the more physically affectionate out of you both. He's the one who pulls you away from whatever you're doing to demand a hug, who kisses you out of nowhere just to see the look of surprise on your face, who pokes at you when he feels like getting your attention.
But he has to admit, seeing you so sleepy and demanding of his affection is quite adorableā€¦ You're never this open when you're fully awake.
"Mm, has Dos-kun been working you too hard, little dove? You look absolutely exhausted~"
You only huff out a sigh, nuzzling into him a little, eyes half lidded. Do you know how dangerous it is to leave yourself vulnerable like this in front of someone as unpredictable as him? You're so lucky he likes you enough not to take advantage!
Certainly worked to the bone, then. Well, Nikolai can take care of that. He pulls you closer, and then the two of you are there and gone. You're too out of it to complain about how you dislike traveling through the overcoat the way you usually would. He coaxes you to get into bed, though it's tricky when you don't want to let go of him. "My, you're clingy today! I will join you momentarily, so lay down, yes?"
You finally seem to settle once he's in bed with you, allowing you to snuggle up to him more comfortably. If you remember this behavior in the morning, you'll certainly be embarrassedā€¦ Which will be just as fun! But for now, Nikolai doesn't tease or toy with you, merely holding you close as you drift off.
Yosano
She's a very busy woman! If she's in the middle of dealing with a patient, you can't disturb her too much, or she'll scold youā€¦
ā€¦So you've made a habit of napping at her desk, if you're sleepy during a workday. It's not the best place, but you can never sleep unless she's around, no matter how tired you areā€¦ Even if you have to listen to some screaming while she worksā€¦
And, hey, Kunkida can't yell at you for being as bad as Dazai, don't sleep on the job, when you're in here.
Yosano is very accommodating when she has the time to spare, though. On days off, or when she's taking a break, she doesn't mind if you come up behind her and wrap your arms around her, peeking over her shoulder sleepily to see what she's up to.
"Tired again?" She hums, finishing putting away her tools and turning to face you. You lean into the hand that comes up to stroke your cheek. "I suppose I could let you sit on my lap while I do the paperwork. Would you like that?"
"Mhmā€¦"
"Come along, then," She coaxes you to come sit with her, allowing you to curl up on her lap as she goes through files. Yosano pressed a kiss to your forehead, fond, before returning focus to her work.
Chuuya
It wouldn't be good for either of your reputations to be clingy at work, so it's reserved for when you're at home. God forbid anyone stops taking you seriously because of a little too much pda...
Chuuya always finds the contrast between how you behave there and here interestingā€¦ The way you go from serious and stern to not wanting to be more than a few feet away from him at any moment. He'd find the affection overbearing, he thinks, if it was anyone else. But he's content to let you lean against him on the couch, or follow after him whenever he's in the kitchen, or when you insist on being spooned at night.
This comes with some issues when the morning comes, though.
"We have to go to work, you're gonna have to let go of me eventually," he tells you, not actually doing all that much to get out of your grip.
You blink up at him, eyes hazy. "A while longer," aaand you're not letting go. Chuuya could fight his way out of bed if he really wanted to, butā€¦ It's not going to hurt to stay a bit longer. If anyone questions his lateness, he can easily scare them off with a glareā€¦
"Fine. You can have your way this time."
This time, and probably every other time. He just can't resist, when you look so cute all sleepy in his armsā€¦
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queenshelby Ā· 6 months ago
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An Illicit Affair
Part 41: Houses
Pairing: Cillian Murphy (46) x Reader (23)
Warning: Age-Gap, Taboo Relationship, Infidelity
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When you arrived at Cillian's apartment later that day, you couldn't help but feel a mix of excitement and anxiety. You had always been independent and strong -willed, but after your injury, you had felt vulnerable and helpless. Thus, having the man you loved look after you was both terrifying and comforting.
"Are you really sure about this?" you asked softly, looking up at him with a mixture of excitement and anxiety. You couldn't help but feel a little overwhelmed by the thought of living with Cillian, even if it was only for a short while.
Cillian nodded, his eyes soft as they met yours. "Yes, I'm sure," he murmured, reaching out to gently push your hair back from your face. "I want to be there for you, to support you and help you through this difficult time," he explained gently, his voice warm and reassuring.
"And, if I'm being completely honest, I've missed having you around. So, if this is what it takes for me to spend more time with you, then I'm all for it," he continued, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips.
You couldn't help but feel your heart flutter at his words. It had been a long time since someone had cared for you in this way and, despite all the challenges that lay ahead, you couldn't help but feel grateful for Cillian's support and understanding.
"Thank you," you whispered, your voice choked with emotion as you looked up at him with a mixture of gratitude and love. You couldn't believe that this man, who had once been your boyfriend's father, was now not only your lover but also your caregiver.
Cillian smiled gently down at you before leaning in to press a tender kiss to your lips. "You don't have to thank me," he murmured against your mouth. "I love you , Y/N. I want to be here for you, in every way possible."
***
Over the weeks that followed, Cillian did, indeed, take care of you and you were becoming more self-sufficient by every day that passed.Ā 
Your body was healing but, more importantly, so was your heart.
You spent every day with Cillian, watching Netflix and ordering take-out food, or sometimes just reading books, talking, and laughing together.
Cillian was incredibly patient with you and always made sure to make you feel comfortable, never pushing you to do more than you were capable of.
It was a slow and steady recovery - physically and emotionally - but with each passing day, you found yourself falling deeper and deeper in love with Cillian.
As your body mended, you also discovered a newfound vulnerability in yourself that you had never acknowledged before. It was a strange feeling to be so dependant on another person, especially considering that your life before the accident had been one filled with independence and determination.
After a while, you managedĀ  to get out of the wheelchair and start using crutches, which allowed you to move around Cillian's apartment with ease.
The physical therapy sessions in London were demanding and left you exhausted but, each passing day, you noticed an improvement in your overall mobility and strength.
The daily sessions were indeed strenuous, but with Cillian by your side, encouraging and cheering you on, it was bearable.
You fell into a comfortable routine, one which became your new normal.
"I want to get rid of these before we are going to the awards. I don't want to be there, in a fancy dress, with crutches," you told Cillian one morning, pointing at your crutches which were lean against the wall near the front door, but he reassured you thatĀ it would be fine.
"I know, but you shouldn't push yourself too much babe, alright? Don't worry about it. You will look stunning regardless," he said, brushing a lock of hair out of your face, and you smiled at him gratefully.
"You are getting an Oscar and I want to support you by not looking like an in injured little bird on your arm," you said, trying to laugh it off, but Cillian frowned, his eyes serious.
"I am not getting an Oscar Y/N. I am just nominated,"Ā Cillian corrected, positioning his fingers on your cheek to trace the curve of your bone structure.
"Well, I personally think you picking up that little statue is a given, but we shall see," youĀ  teased, leaning into his touch.
"Well, I suppose we'll find out soon enough," he said, a hint of nervousness underlying his voice, but that hint of nervousness was not because of the impending academy awards. It was because of the ongoing legal battle against his ex-wife Danielle and the charges that had been brought against her. These were all matters he had shielded you from and you knew literally nothing about how bad things had become.Ā 
Cillian was a great actor and pretended that everything was fine whereas, the truth was that, forĀ almost two months now, he not only had to deal with some negative press because of Danielle's actions, but also with strenuous court proceedings and appeals with regards to her care.
Having been admitted to an institution for treatment, it was no surprise that she tried her best to manipulate the situation by using Max against Cillian, reminding him over and over again that his father's actions led her to do what she did.
She wanted you gone from their life after the mess you had created and the fact that you now lived with Cillian angered Danielle greatly. Danielle, however, wasn't the only one who was angered by this. Max, too was angry, but not just for the reasons as his mother was. He believed that, despite his protests, Cillian had chosen to put his relationship with you before his relationship with him.
"You should have ended this once and for all after mum found out and none of this would have happened," Max thus told his father during the last hearing in court just a few days ago, but Cillian remained adamant that you two, as consenting adults, were able to choose what it was you wanted to do in your lives.
"Max, it's not that simple. Your mother has manipulated our marriage for many years and I stayed with her to protect you from, well, shit like this," Cillian said, trying to remain calm while explaining the situation to his son.
Max sneered and shook his head. "Tell yourself whatever you want dad, but all of this is your fault. You had an affair with my fucking girlfriend for crying out loud, and then you're surprised when Mom goes off the deep end?" Max said, disdain evident in his voice. Cillian sighed deeply, running a hand through his short hair. He knew that Max was angry, and rightfully so. But he couldn't let Max believe that Danielle's actions were solely his fault.
"Max, I understand that you're upset. And I'm sorry for that, I truly am. But I didn't force your mother to do anything. She made a series of bad decisions, and now she's paying the price for them," Cillian continued with a heavy heart.
"She certainly is and you still got what you wanted, didn't you?" Max sneered before telling his father that he should end it now at least. He told him to choose between you or him, whichĀ  left Cillian torn between a rock and a hard place.
"Max, I am not going to break up with Y/N," Cillian declared, his voice firm as he looked upon his son with a mixture of sadness and determination.
"Then I don't want to see you again, dad. You may as well be dead to me," Max replied, his voice filled with anger and resentment. "You chose her over me, over mum, and it's fucked up," Max added, before storming out of the courtroom's foyer following the hearing.
Cillian couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt as he watched his son leave, his heart heavy with the weight of the situation.
He knew that Max was angry, and he couldn't blame him. But he also knew that he couldn't just end things with you, not after everything they had been through together.
"He will come around," Dermont said, who had come to most court hearings with his friend for moral support.Ā 
"I hope you're right," Cillian murmured, his eyes clouded with worry. Max's rejection cut deep, and Cillian couldn't bear the thought of severing ties with his son permanently. "I can understand why he is angry and upset with me but, fuck, I cannot just end it with Y/N," he told Dermont as they waited for his solicitor who was still inside, talking to Danielle's attorney.Ā 
"You aren't with her simply out of pity though, are you?" DermontĀ  asked, his voice carrying a slight hint of concern as he looked at Cillian with a curious gaze.
Cillian looked back at his friend and shook his head firmly. "No man. I actuallyĀ have feelings for her," Cillian confessed, his voice steady but hesitant. "She's helped me see things differently, opened my eyes to things I never realized about myself. And I really love her," he admitted, a hint of vulnerability in his voice.
Dermont nodded, understanding the gravity of Cillian's words. "Then you have to follow your heart mate and give Max some space to come to terms with this," he advised, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder in a comforting gesture.
Cillian nodded, acknowledging Dermont's advice. He knew that Max needed time and space to process everything that had happened, and he was determined to give him just that.
As the days went by, Cillian found himself becoming even more invested in his relationship with you.
Despite the challenges that lay ahead, he was determined to make it work, to support and care for you in every way possible and even though you saw staying with him at his apartment as a temporary solution, CillianĀ  couldn't help but imagine the two of you living together long-term.
He saw it as a chance to start anew, to leave the past behind and build a life together and when, one later afternoon, he came home with a few brochures for houses in a different suburb of London, you became curious.
"Suburbia, huh?" you said with surprise as you looked over the brochures Cillian had set on the coffee table. "Are you looking to move?" you asked, not knowing that Cillian wanted you to move with him.
"Well, I think us staying in the same apartment building as my son isn't the best of ideas right now. I want to give him some space. He deserves that and I was thinking that, maybe, moving out of the city would be a nice change," Cillian explained, a hint of uncertainty in his voice as he looked down at the brochures on the table.Ā 
"Don't you have a house in Dublin?" you asked, genuinely surprised. You never thought about Cillian living in the busy city of London, at least not full-time.
He shook his head. "I am going to put it on the market soon. It holds too many bad memories to be honest,"Ā  Cillian replied with a shrug, a pained expression crossing his face as he took a deep breath. You could sense the pain in his voice, the sadness that lingered behind his words as he recalled all that had transpired in that once happy home.
For a moment, you reached out to take his hand in yours, to reassure him that you were there for him, that you would be there for him through every victory and every loss. "I get it, but I am just surprised, you know," you simply said with a nod, squeezing his hand gently in yours.Ā  "So, you want to stay in London then permanently?" you ought to askĀ  , a somewhat expectant smile gracing your features as you regarded Cillian with curiosity. There was a definite hint of hopefulness in your tone, one that you couldn't quite suppress.
Cillian nodded, looking at you with a steady gaze. "Yes. I want to make this work between us, and I know that your life is here, so it would make sense for me to live in London permanently, right?" he explained, a hint of determination in his voice as his eyes never left yours.
"Well, it would, but I don't want you to live here just for me," you murmured sincerely, looking up at him with a concerned expression.Ā 
"I intend to build a life here for both of us, Y/N," Cillian replied, a gentle smile spreading across his lips. "It would be our home, a place for us to enjoy together, and, maybe we could even get a dog and, I don't know, have kids or something one day," he continued, his voice strong and steady.
"You want to have kids? And a dog? With me?" youĀ  asked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in the conversation.
Cillian nodded, a smile on his lips. "Yes, with you, one day, not right now," he said emphatically. "Unless you don't want kids, or a dog, of course," he added, a hint of uncertainty creeping into his voice. "I mean we could always just get a cat or something," he then stammered , quickly regretting the word choice as he saw the surprised expression on your face.
"A cat!?" you laughed, shaking your head and playfully fluttering your eyelashes at him. "I am, uhm, I am not really a cat person,"Ā 
you murmured, still chuckling lightly at how absurd the idea seemed, but Cillian merely raised his brows, a playful grin tugging at the corners of this full lips.
"Well, I can cater to your preferences then, how about that?" he asked, his voice still soft, but now tinged with a slight hint of challenge, one that, if you didn't know him, might have given you the wrong impression.
"Sounds good but, just to let me get this straight, you actually want me to move in with you permanently?"Ā  you asked, placing the brochures down on the coffee table as you turned to face Cillian fully.
Cillian nodded, his gaze steady and determined as he looked at you. "Yes , I do want you to move in with me permanently," he said, his voice clear and strong as he took your hands in his. "I know it's a big decision and not one to be taken lightly. But I want you by my side, Y/N. I want to build a life with you," he continued, a hint of vulnerability in his voice as he looked at you with a mixture of love and hope.
You sighed softly, your eyes never leaving Cillian's as you considered his words.Ā 
"Okay, but no cats!"Ā  you said, laughing as you responded to Cillian's proposal. The idea of sharing a home with him felt both exciting and overwhelming. You had always been fiercely independent, but Cillian had managed to wiggle his way into your heart and life in a way that you couldn't deny. "And I will think about starting a family together one day, but not any time soon. For now, let's just keep practicing making babies, okay?" you winked at Cillian who broke out in a deep laugh.Ā 
"Practicing sounds good to me," he smiled back before pulling you into another deep and passionate kiss, a promise of things to come.
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