#that we still have a functioning relationship and he is actually the best coolest dad ever

[fruitydiaz]

my dad and i used to sing billy joel’s piano man with each other at every family party. like not actually sing it like perform it with each other but it was on every playlist at every party and when it came on we’d stand in the middle of the room and sing all of five minutes and 38 seconds of it together. because my dad’s been the biggest billy joel fan since the dawn of time and i learned the words because it was his favorite song. anyways over the last couple of years i obviously rarely attend any family parties but when i do ive noticed that they still play piano man but he never looks for me to sing it with anymore. he’ll sing it with his cousin or his friend or my 3 year old cousin that obviously doesn’t know the words because she is literally 3 years old. and i know that this is some bizarre kind of punishment because that is who he is as a person so i try not to think about it. of course this is relevant now because on our rsvp for the wedding i (stupid) left a space for song requests and my dad did of course request piano man. and now i have to decide whether or not i want to put it on the playlist.

[trashcankitty12]

Brandon Headcanons:

Everyone, I’d like to introduce Brandon Shapiro.

You may know him as Princess Stella’s boyfriend, or perhaps as Prince Sky’s bodyguard.

However you may know him, you probably have a positive opinion on him, as he’s one of the best guys around.

(All headcanons are for my main verses, the Balance/New Company of Light au and the Left au.)

-Brandon, like Flora, comes from a large family. (A fairly well-to-do family in Eraklyon. Upper middle-class, if you will. Mostly thanks to Mom’s job as one of Queen Samara’s guards and Dad’s job as the head of the stables.)

-(He has so many aunts/uncles/cousins… They literally have a family group chat to keep up with everyone. Once every few years there is an attempt at a family reunion. Many show, a few don’t. But it’s always fun.)

-He has two older siblings and three younger ones. (His eldest sister and his younger twin brothers are adopted. They were some of the displaced kids after the Great War.)

-Eldest sister is part of Eraklyon’s army and is pretty powerful elemental. (Her element of choice is air, but she isn’t above using a little fire power or some powerful stone spells.)

-His older brother (who is really only a year older than him) goes to the Eraklyon Institute and has hopes of becoming a Paladin (which he does become, serving Eraklyon of course.). Brandon really looks up to him.

-The twins are about a year or two younger than Brandon, and one of them has magic. (He’s not the best at drawing his power yet, but he’s getting there.) They also decide to go to the Eraklyon Institute, but for different career paths. The magical one is studying to become a healer/doctor with his magic while his brother wants to learn how to be a beast tamer.

-And then there’s the youngest, Brandon’s younger sister. She’s about five at the beginning of the series, but is currently about to enroll at Alfea. (She wanted to, pardon the pun, spread her wings away from her family.)

-As a middle child, Brandon often played mediator to his siblings whenever their parents weren’t home. He didn’t want anyone to get into trouble for fighting. (Especially the magically charged siblings… That would have been fun to explain.)

-When he was old enough, his dad would take him to the stables with him and show him how to properly take care of the horses and dragons. (Young Brandon thought they were just the coolest things and he was so excited and always felt so grown-up.)

-Which is how he met a young Sky and ended up becoming the prince’s best friend and bodyguard.

-He loved the education opportunities he got by being allowed to follow Sky to his prep school (even if he felt a little guilty about it because of his siblings, even though they encouraged him to follow his pursuits).

-And then when they got to go to Red Fountain, it was like a dream come true. (Granted, Brandon hadn’t wanted to be a military guy, but being a personal guard for Sky had become second-nature… And the fact that a Red Fountain education could get him into other lines of protection work…)

-(Brandon has a naturally protective personality okay? It comes with being an older sibling and growing up in a very family-oriented, we protect each other, household.)

-Of course, before they could go to Red Fountain, Brandon had to attend a few manners and etiquette classes and learn a bit more about the Eraklyon Royal Family’s heritage extensively. (He was going to have to pretend to be Sky after all.)

-He absolutely hated lying to everyone about who he was and he hated trying to pretend to be his best friend. He kept fearing he was going to act like a caricature of a prince instead of actually being princely. Or worse, that someone would end up hurt because of his lies.

-(Which, lo and behold, did happen.)

-(Honestly, Brandon never really likes speaking out against King Erendor, but he feels it was pretty fucking stupid for him to have Brandon and Sky swap places, and then to show up to MASSIVELY PUBLIC EVENT and out them like that. Even if was sort of brought on because of Diapsro.)

-(Which also pisses off Brandon, because Erendor and Samara knew that Diaspro has always been extremely public about her relationship to Sky because she thinks it brings her status. Which… It does… But dammit there were death threats!)

-Anyway, he did eventually make it up to Stella and the others, which was a huge relief.

-(Yes the others were angry with him. And not just the other Winx members either. Timmy had been extremely hurt about the deception, even though he had already pieced it together before the Day of the Royals. He had felt they were friends and that they should have told him sooner so he could have helped. And Riven…? He was still with Darcy at this point and was using the whole ordeal to gloat and honestly… Brandon had almost lost his hard-won cool.)

-Now out of the drama.

-At Red Fountain, Brandon really thrived. He found others like him who just honestly wanted to try and make the Magical Dimension safer for their loved ones. He made friends with those outside of Eraklyon’s (judgmental) high society. And he was allowed to be more himself instead of just Sky’s guard.

-Brandon is straight, but he’s not afraid to admit that there are some very pretty men out there. In fact, he wishes guys would be more accepting of complimenting each other and being there emotionally for one another. Society would be sooooo much better.

-(Then again… He was raised by fairly progressive-for Eraklyon parents and his older sister had actually explained and went over toxic masculinity with him and his brothers. Granted, she did it because she had a friend who got hurt because of this mind set and she wanted her brothers to be aware that she’d kill them if she found out they ever treated a person like that, but still… The lessons stuck.)

-In his squad, he mainly plays as support/rescue/or pilot.

-Besides Timmy and Helia, he really is the best at piloting ships and doesn’t even have to rely on the navigation system. (He’s been to so many realms because of functions Sky and Stella have to go, that he just memorizes the routes.)

-And it helps that he has a photographic memory. Which comes in handy given his current line of work protecting Sky. (And Stella. Radius and Luna have both made it very clear that even though Stella is capable of protecting herself, they still want Brandon do whatever is necessary to make sure she stays safe.)

-(Which he would have done anyway, but hey… Orders are orders.)

-Brandon is great with swords and shields, but his aim with bows and arrows sucks. He’s decent with blasters though.

-Also, dealing with cannons? Not his thing.

-He’s the greatest mechanic either… But he is a pretty good medic. (Thanks to Sky who always had to get into trouble as a kid. Brandon got firsthand experience with fixing injuries well-enough that no one would know the injury ever occurred.)

-Out of the squad, he is also the best at cooking, besides Riven and Helia. He loves cooking and it brings these calming memories of cooking with his dad and younger sister and it just… It’s peaceful. And seeing the looks of joy on everyone’s face after they eat his cooking, icing on the cake.

-Brandon loved off-world (out of Magix) missions/training exercises best. He loves to explore new places. Even if they are in the more dangerous places of the realm.

-Yes, he knows he has a pretty face and decent (okay, pretty attractive body). It’s good genes and a great workout/healthy eating regimen.

-(And even though he doesn’t always, he does flaunt it on occasion. Usually when he and Stella start their ‘who can get asked out more in one outing’ contests. Granted, she usually wins, but he’s had his moments.)

-Yes, he’s secure enough in his relationship with Stella that they can do those sorts of contests without truly getting angry. He knows Stella well-enough to know that if she ever really tired of him, she’d say it. (She tends to be blunt, after all.)

-He also tends to be the one, aside from Helia, to give advice to the others. It’s humbling and ego-stroking a bit to him that they think that highly of him and his advice. But sometimes, he honestly has no idea. (Just because he has Stella doesn’t mean he’s completely aware of how he’s kept Stella… Okay?)

-Brandon loves surfing. He started doing it when his older brother would take him and the other younger siblings off to the beach for a bit, and he just fell in love. He’s nowhere near as good as the Androsian or Tidese surfers, but he’s confident he’s one of the best in Eraklyon.

-(Nabu and Layla totally wipe him out when they all start to surf together. He’s pretty sure they cheat.)

-He also loves levibike racing. Nothing gets his heart pumping quite so fast. (And Stella made him a pretty awesome uniform. It hugs him well, is protective against injuries, and is in a nice blend of Eraklyon and Solarian colors. And the helmet as a little star on it, a Stella signature.)

-Brandon may have a slight addiction to this berry-tea blend that Flora came up with sophomore year. Just a slight one… Okay so maybe it’s a problem. But it just tastes so goooood.

-He loves spicy food, which is fantastic when he goes to Solaria for dinners with Stella’s parents. Solarian food tends to be super spicy.

-Yes, he’s met a few times with Radius and Luna. (The first time, at the same time. And then he’s had separate dinners/holiday things with each of them and Stella. He does his best to impress both.)

-Brandon has been extremely lucky in his life to have not broken many bones. Granted, he’s broke a few and had some serious stitches done a few times, but he’s never had too serious of injuries. (Riven on the otherhand…)

-He has a slight case of tendonitis in his legs. Its due to how much time he’s spent on his feet and the types of exercises he does/the sort of physical activity he gets in too. But he deals with it nicely and does all the PT necessary to keep the flare ups to a minimum.

-Brandon loves romance movies and sci-fi movies. He’s a very complicated man.

-He once tried to grow a bit of a moustache when he first hit puberty, but decided against it after seeing an old picture of his dad with one. (No. Just. No. They do not have the right face for that.)

-He’s able to speak several languages, but it’s mainly just the important phrases. Namely “This is Prince Sky of Eraklyon. Do not touch.”

-Honestly, he doesn’t mind all of the craziness that seems to follow him and his friend, but sometimes he wishes the Magical Dimension would just stay saved. Just for a little while. Please? He’s tired. He’s soooo tired.

-All of these adventures have also given him a bit of perspective and given him a chance to try and figure his own wants out a little better. (Particularly about Sky and Stella.)

-He’s not too sure yet, but if he and Stella ever do get engaged, (which, he has a feeling they will because he loves Stella and he knows that even with her insecurities about marriage, she’ll most likely want to marry him too) he’ll start personally vetting soldiers/guards for Sky. And then he’ll prepare to deep dive into Solaria’s history and laws.

-After all, if he does become the King of Solaria, he wants to be damn-sure he’s a good one. One worthy of Stella and the crown. (And one that his family will be proud of.)

[echodrops]

Home and a Half Pidge Headcanons

An ask I got yesterday reminded me that I never posted the HaaH headcanons for Pidge like I promised, so here they are! (I’ll answer the actual ask as soon as I can with some new material instead of headcanons I already had written... oops...)

Anyway, without further ado, some headcanons for Pidge related to my fic Home and a Half!

Pidge:

- Grew up in the picture of the nuclear family: mom, dad, two kids, dog, nice upper-middle-class house in a quiet neighborhood, dinner on the table at 7:30pm on the dot… Of all the paladins, Pidge had the most stable and “average” childhood… at least on paper.

 - In reality, there is not a single person in the Holt family who isn’t eccentric as fuck. Grandma Holt? May or may not still be an active intelligence agent for MI6. The dog? Woofs in Morse code. Auntie Ariana? Has actually seen the Jersey Devil. Colleen Holt? Has killed a man. If you ask Pidge, she’ll say that her upbringing was perfectly normal and she’ll genuinely mean it, but this is a consequence Pidge having no idea what “normal” even means.

 Rest under the read more to save your dash:

- Not actually a girly-girl when she was young. Although they’re eight years apart and thus unlikely to be mistaken for one another, very early on Pidge got frustrated by how similar she and Matt look, and she definitely did not want to wear his tacky hand-me-down clothes, so she pitched a royal fit and insisted on wearing dresses and hairbands so that her family would have to buy Pidge all her own things. (They probably would have bought them anyway if she’d just asked calmly, but Pidge was three at the time, and they were all very impressed by her grasp of cause and effect.)

 - Of course, when Matt disappeared on the ill-fated Kerberos trip, those tacky hand-me-downs ended up being some of the most important items in Pidge’s life. Even outside of infiltrating Garrison, wearing Matt’s old clothes was one of the few comforts Pidge would allow herself—when she cut her hair and put on his baggy shirts, for a second, looking in a mirror, she could almost convince herself he was still there—

 - Pidge has no intention of changing the way she dresses or styles her appearance until she’s reunited with Matt and her father. After that? Well, they may not be the coolest looking things ever, but Matt does have a point that baggy t-shirts are very comfy…

 - And okay, because I’m sure everyone expected this headcanon first: Pidge and gender is a surprisingly uncomplicated subject. Side note before I go further: I’m sure everyone has their own headcanons for this and none of what I say here should be taken as rejecting or invalidating any other fan’s views on Pidge. The only thing invalid in the Voltron fandom is canon. Anyway, I personally like to imagine that Pidge is very ambivalent on gender. There is so much else going on—the war, Sam and Matt being missing, freaking giant robot space cats—that sitting down and sorting out the question of “Do I identify as male, female, nonbinary, or anything else?” is just really, really low on Pidge’s to do list. Pidge thinks of Pidge as “Pidge” and even that’s rare because Pidge doesn’t sit around thinking about herself or what other people think of her.

 - In fact, what strangers think is, in general, extremely low on Pidge’s radar. Although she used to be more self-conscious due to bullying from both classmates and her teachers, the combination of her parents’ consistent support and Matt’s… extreme tactics (“I’m telling you Pigeon, nanobots in their lunches will solve all your problems.” “That’s illegal, Matt.” “Nothing is illegal until you get caught.”) Pidge (mostly) overcame the phase of being affected by other people’s opinions. Who cares what strangers think? Absolutely none of them will ever be even close to as smart and talented as her family anyway. (My IQ is three times yours, your argument about my gender is literally invalid.)

 - By the way, I’m using “her” simply because that’s what I’m used to seeing in the fandom and to keep the fic and headcanons consistent, but in the functional world of HaaH, Pidge answers to any pronouns and doesn’t have a preference for any set in particular over others. In fact, Pidge is used to going by different sets of pronouns coming from different people, and might be “he” to one person, “she” to another, and “they” to yet someone else. Pidge is just… Pidge.

 - Again, with the war and Voltron and missing family and literally everything else going on--and the fact Pidge is far more practical than all of the rest of her fellow Team Voltron members combined--she isn’t wasting time and energy doing something as troublesome as falling in love with an alien. (“Keith, can’t your melodrama wait until after we win the war?” “My drama waits for no man.” “Then please explain how you and Lance manage to engage in synchronized dumb-fuckery at least three times a week.”) Eventually, after life has settled down and Pidge has had some time to think about it, she’ll realize that the reason she somehow managed to avoid any romantic entanglements in space isn’t because she’s just much more mature than her teammates (although this might be true)—it’s that she’s just not really interested in romantic engagements with anybody, period. 

 - Pidge’s one true love is discovery; she feels far more passionate about knowledge and learning new things, encountering new puzzles, and grasping new concepts than she does about anything else. In between all her creations and codes and experiments and observations, it just doesn’t feel like there’s room—or that there needs to be room—for a romantic relationship with a real person.

 - Pidge will make room for friends though, if and when they insist on worming their ways into her life. She tends to be a fairly private person who has never really had a large friend group (back on Earth, before Garrison, there wasn’t anyone but Matt and her parents who really understood her, and she didn’t have much in common to discuss with children her own age), but once someone earns Pidge’s trust, she does open up and form close bonds and she will give her all to help and be there for her few, but close, friends.

 - Meeting Hunk at Garrison was a huge revelation. Up to that point in Pidge’s life she had never really met any young person outside her own family with a soaring genius-level IQ that was a match for her own. Although she and Hunk bicker frequently because their approaches to science are extremely different, she’s still over-the-moon to have someone who doesn’t stare at her like she’s talking gibberish whenever she goes off on one of her tangents.

 - If you ask Pidge, she will violently swear up and down that Lance never and in. no. way. reminds her of Matt, fills in for Matt in the lame-older-brother role, or helps her miss her brother just a little bit less. That did not happen, never had a chance of happening, what are you even talking about—

 - But if you ask about Shiro, she will be flat-out honest and admit she totally thinks of him as Space Dad. It’s not her fault. Shiro literally hero worships Sam Holt (still to this day!!) and may or may not have taken on more of his mentor’s mannerisms in order to fill the leadership role for Team Voltron. Sometimes Shiro will say or do something and Pidge will be absolutely dumb-struck because he got that from my dad is an actual thing she has to deal with.

- “Pidge” is actually a derivative of “Pigeon.” Everyone in the Holt family has a bird-based code name. Mr. Holt is Eagle Two.

 - People often get the impression that Pidge is scatterbrained because she can talk about ten different things at once and pounces on leaps in her own logic that other people just can’t follow, but her thoughts and speech are very organized. It’s not her fault you couldn’t understand her system of organization if you tried.

 - Put Pidge on the spot on a subject she doesn’t know, though, and watch the awkward jump right out. (“Oh, you meant the pop band Galileo, not the person. You know, that’s really an easy mistake to make. You can hardly blame me when you stop to consider all the similarities between modern chord progression and the trajectory of supermassive objects like—”)

 - And if it’s not awkward, it’s defensive. Pidge may be hyper-intelligent, but she’s still very, very young, and it’s hard not to get snappish when challenged by people whose opinions she really does care about. She has a far quicker temper than Matt (who is a “revenge is a dish best served cold” champion), a trait she shares with their mother. Colleen, in turn, blames it on her having been born in New Jersey. Pidge has flipped so many tables on the Castleship that Coran and Lance eventually went around and bolted them all down.

 - Do not even so much as hint that Sam and Matt Holt might be dead instead of just missing in space. Keith is still scared after his last attempt at reasoning with Pidge about her family’s fate.

 - Has a bad hoarding habit. Back on Earth she had her parents there to insist she clean her room at least once a week, but in space, things are getting a bit crazy. The Castleship closets and cabinets can hyper-condense their contents and she’s STILL running out of room for all the neat doodads and parts and scientific wonders she finds on their adventures across the galaxy. Is definitely in the “Look, there’s still a mostly clear path to the door; it’s fineee” category. It’s not like she finds it hard to let things go once she’s gotten attached to them or anything. Nope. Definitely not.

 - Pidge’s mess is absolutely of the “everything has a proper place” type though. Move anything with her name on it and you will feel her wrath.

- As the only one of the Earth paladins to have technology on her when they were unexpectedly swept off to war, everyone on the ship relies on Pidge’s laptop for their monthly dose of Earth nostalgia. Good thing for them Pidge and Matt’s pirating skills put Pirate Bay to shame, and she’s got basically every Earth movie from 1980 to the present. She even has every episode of the timeless classic F.R.I.E.N.D.S. (Keith hates that show with a burning passion that even he cannot explain.)

 - Speaking of technology Pidge had on Earth—every single person in the Holt family is (and has been for decades) aware of the existence of aliens. Pidge’s family tree has been involved in communications, radio wave technology, and interpreting space observations since those fields were first invented. When Earth first identified patterns of waves that obviously corresponded to alien communications going on outside Earth’s galaxy, Pidge’s great- great- grandfather was there. When world governments covered up the discovery, he was the loudest voice of dissent. Since then, the Holt family has been deeply involved in military and space operations across several countries, operating from within an oppressive system they fundamentally disagree with, using their positions of authority to monitor the Milky Way and beyond, keeping tabs on what the aliens might be saying—and what messages Earth might be inadvertently sending back.

 - Of course this is top secret work—secret even from the Garrison and government where the Holts were employed. Other kids learn how to play piano and soccer; Pidge and Matt learned how to hack virtually impenetrable military databases and hide their data behind uncrackable ciphers instead.

 - But the Kerberos Mission was supposed to be safe. They’d all monitored the chatter so closely—there hadn’t been anything hostile anywhere even near Earth’s galaxy, no sign at all of any technologically advanced race like the Galra in years and nothing about one little Earth mission that would disturb any other intergalactic travelers anyway… Why would they...

 - Pidge is surprisingly athletic for a self-professed nerd. With youthful energy to burn and a family to save, Pidge took to Allura and Coran’s intense Altean training like a duck to water, and while she’s not quite Shiro or Keith when it comes to hand-to-hand combat, she can definitely holds up better than Hunk or Lance.

 - Favorite color is actually yellow, and if Green wasn’t totally The Coolest™ lion, she’d be sort of salty about Hunk getting the Yellow Lion instead.

 - Absolutely capable of cursing up a blue storm, and hasn’t been friends with Hunk quite long enough yet to remember to censor herself around him all the time like Lance does with his “Holy crow!”s. She’s trying, dammit!

 - Big on pets. Gets attached to pet-shaped creatures (whether living or robotic) very easily. 110% kept the space caterpillars, who live happily free-roaming the piles of space junk in her bedroom. The space caterpillars and the space mice do not get along, however, as the space mice do not take well to having their status as the favored fuzzy team mascot squad threatened. In their micro-Cold War, which is occurring without any of the ship’s humanoid occupants being aware, the space caterpillars are currently winning.

 - The caterpillars’ names are Copernicus, Kepler, and Newton.

 - Remember that one post about Lance drawing angry brows on the space caterpillar and siccing it on Keith? I very much accept that as canon. Pidge was Not Happy™ when she found out what Lance had done and she is NOT letting anyone else near her caterpillars again any time soon. Is very, very careful not to let Niresh see the space caterpillars so that they don’t end up stolen right from under her nose.

 - Speaking of the kids, Pidge is super awkward with them and skedaddles at the first sign of tears. Next to Allura, there is probably not any member of the team worse suited to babysitting duty. That said, as someone who has lost members of her family in the war, Pidge is probably the member of the team who most directly understands Dulsara’s anger and the children’s loss. That doesn’t mean she’s really ready to let herself sympathize with the Galra though, at least not until she finds her own family first.

- Pulls all the most bullshit moves in Monsters and Mana. Whenever the team reminiscences on the truly legendary moments from their campaigns, somehow Pidge is the star in all of them.

And that’s all I’ve got for now!

[rynhaswritersblock]

new york boy (hc) | p.p.

a/n: 50TH IMAGINE WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWWWWWWWWWWW!! this shit go 🅱razy!

summary: life is hard when you visit your uncle in new york and all of a sudden there's a cute boy named peter parker in your life (i suck at summaries just stick with me here)

warnings: the usual fluff/hella cussing + like a minute of slight angst, also DEADASS THIS IS LIKE 8.5K WORDS I GOT SO SO SOOOOOO CARRIED AWAY AHSAHDJFKSNFK

ALSO I APOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCONSISTENCIES OR TYPOS OR ANYTHING I LITERALLY WROTE THIS OVER A FEW DAYS AND GOT SO CARRIED AWAY WITH DIFFERENT PLOTLINES AND BASICALLY WHAT IM SAYING IS THIS IS VERY VERY CHAOTIC BUT I HOPE YOU GUYS GET THE POINT LOL

+ + +

- SECOND HEADCANON IN A ROW YEAHYEAH

- you guys i've had a one direction relapse i was literally Obsessed with them like eight years ago (when they were still together rip) and all of a sudden they are just living in my brain Rent Free once again

- btw harry is my favorite and always has been. call me basic but it's been an eight year bond so try and fight that 😌✋

- anyways time to write the actual fucking story

- haha Oops!

- no i didn't accidentally spell oops "opps" at first. the fact that you even think that is complete absurdity

- CAN LITTLE THINGS BY 1D STOP MAKING ME EMOTIONAL RIGHT NOW

- this is the eighth bullet point and i have yet to get into the actual story holy fuck

- guys i just watched knives out (yeah i know i'm late whatever) and i haven't fully processed it yet but it was Muy Bueno!

- STEAL MY GIRL IS PLAYING

i knowwww i knowwww i knowwww for sure

EVERYBODY WANNA STEAL MY GIRL

EVERYBODY WANNA TAKE HER HEART AWAY

- i am so sorry

- OKAY THIS IS WHERE THE ACTUAL STORY STARTS HOLY SHIT

- yeah ❤

- SO BASICALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- fuck what is this imagine about again?

- OH RIGHT

- OKAY

- YOU'RE TONY STARK'S NIECE OKAY

- don't ask me how that works i have No Fucking Clue (which i'm sure you've gathered at this point)

- (i don't know what i'm doing)

- y'all i've got a headache but ❤ nevertheless she persisted ❤

- so basically

- you live like

- not... in new york...?????????

- so like SOMEWHERE ELSE

- let's say you live in like california

- YEAHYEAH OKAY

- SO LIKE YK HOW TONY USED TO LIVE IN CALI

- so you and uncle tones (😌) were super close when he lived in cali and he'd like pick you up from school and get you ice cream and basically be the Coolest Uncle Ever

- ur mom (let's say she's tony's sister) would be like 🙄 whenever he'd goof around with u but she loved y'all's relationship

- ain't that fluffy

- but THEN

- tony moved to new york

- bitch how fucking rude is that

- so u were like

- a little dead inside

- but that was when you were like six so time moved at Hyper Speed back then and you don't really like Remember the Pain 😀

- OH AND BY THE WAY KINDA IMPORTANT SIDE NOTE!!!!!

- SINCE UR MOM GOT MARRIED SHE TOOK YOUR DAD'S LAST NAME (aka l/n) AND YOU KEEP THE FACT THAT TONY IS YOUR UNCLE A SECRET FOR LIKE SAFETY REASONS IG LOL

- Anyways! from there on you only visit once a year and be there for a week

- but u best BELIEVE those visits were HYPE AS FUCK YEAHYEAH

- when you turned 13 ur mom surprised you by finally letting you start going by yourself

- badass 13 year old y/n 😌

- so u were like Heck Yeah!

- YeahYeah 😀😀😀

- happy picks you up from the airport and ur like "uh hi"

- ANYWAYS THE POINT IS YOU START TRAVELLING TO NEW YORK ALONE

- SO!!!!!!!!!! WE ARE NOW IN PRESENT TIME

- you go on your annual trip

- happy picks you up as per usual

- the usual awkward convo goes on which typically goes something like:

"are you excited to see your uncle" "yeah" "cool" "mhmm"

- yeah ❤

- but anyways by the time you're like 10 mins away you're practically Bouncing in your seat

- happy is like.... Girl. Calm Down! 😀

"oh by the way tony has the kid over today"

- bro Huh???????????

- ??????

- "the kid" Very Specific Thank You!

- you're like "who tf is the kid"

"spider-man"

......

😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳

- your head SPINS over to happy

"he's SPIDER-MAN?"

- happy just gets that Smug Smile Look on his face (y'all know the face) and shrugs, pulling into the garage

- you JUMP out of the car

- you wanna see sum real speed?

"identific-"

"FRIDAY! it's y/n let me in!!!"

- bitch calm down

"welcome back, y/n"

- WANNA SEE SUM REAL SPEED? 2.0

- you BUST through the doors

- not to mention your backpack is Barely Hanging On and happy is still in the garage hurling your suitcase out of the trunk

- sorry happy 😔😔

- happy ain't lookin so happy rn!

"friday, where's my uncle?"

"he's in the laboratory"

- WANNA SEE SUM REAL SPEED?????? 3.0

- go! go! go! go! go! go! go! go!

- spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬

- you FLY down the stairs to the lab

- tony looks over and a smile immediately breaks on his face

- you look disheveled as HELL cause you're like panting and Far Too Excited

- peter looks over and sees you and is like 0_0

- as soon as you see peter you're ALSO like 0_0

- he cute

- wait no fuck he's HOT

"short-circuit!"

- you manage to tear your eyes from peter Somehow and look over at tony, smiling like a madwoman as you jump into his arms and give him a hug

"short-circuit?"

- oh damn

- this kid's Voice!!!!!!!!!!

- adorable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- you and tony pull apart and tony explains the nickname

"peter, this is y/n, my niece. short-circuit just so happens to come from when this idiotic girl will be talking about something when we're in the lab and she suddenly drifts off and gets this zoned out look on her face. she short-circuits, basically"

- peter's Still like 0_0

- his brain can't even Function Properly because tony was just explaining the next updates to peter's suit and then you're here and you're really pretty and tony apparently has a niece? and Everything Is Happening!!!!!!!!

"well im so sorry that i drift off because my brain is coming up with super cool stuff, which usually tends to make your little inventions even better. let's not forget me figuring out how to properly program JARVIS"

- *not peter's 0_0 look managing to amplify*

- eyebrows are RAISED

- (also quick moment of silence for jarvis i miss him 😔)

in memoriam:

graphic design is my passion 2.0

fyi graphic design is my passion is becoming a new ~segment~ on these hcs because i love making them and i deadass couldn't stop laughing at my last one

- okay back to Da Program

- all tony does is scoff, clapping you on the back

"anyways... peter's interning for me, so i was just explaining-"

- intern? i don't think so!

- time to be a stark and fuck things up!

- YEAHYEAH

"happy told me he was spider-man? the suit is literally on that table over there? unless he's doing both spider-man and an internship? which is honestly impressive, i mean-" you look over at peter, "with school and everything- unless you don't go to school, but still-"

- you look back over and tony and this man is.........

- he's got that Look on his face you know what i'm talking about

"dammit, now i gotta go yell at happy"

"oh shit was i not supposed to know?"

- tony gives you an exasperated look and you're like Oops!

"it would've been better if you didn't know. just don't go running that big mouth of yours"

- you give him an offended look before being like Okay Fine Whatever

- tony is just tired and peter's standing there like OH FUCK UH OKAY??????????

- aka that one scene in infinity war

moving on

"y/n, your room is set up. i'm gonna finish up here with pete and then we can go get cheeseburgers. deal?"

- you smile and nod, giving tony a kiss on the cheek (signature stark move)

- (i'm sad now)

- (fuck)

- you start to walk off and look over at peter

"it was nice meeting you, peter"

- mans is like Oh! Who? Me!

"oH- uh- y- yeah, it was nice meeting you, too"

- you give him a small smile and walk up the stairs out of the lab

- fucking dopey ass smile on your face because YOU JUST MET CUTE BOY SPIDERMAN AND HES CUTE AND HOT AND KJSDFHKSDJF FUCK!!!!!!!!!!

- peter looks back from watching you walk away and makes sure you're out of earshot

- fyi his ears are like Red Red and homeboy looks WHIPPED

- silly goose. fools fall in love

"i-um, i didn't know you had a niece?"

- tony just kind of scoffs

- very original reaction, tony! Never Been Done before, Especially by you! Wow!

"and i didn't realize how little time it takes for you to fall in love. i mean the bar was low but, jeez, kid"

"wait- no- i'm not in love"

"hmm okay. but if i catch you pulling something i will not hesitate to say i told you s-"

"no- yeah- that won't be, uh, that won't be a problem, mr stark"

- yeah tell that to your FACE peter

- he's like No! Of Course Not! meanwhile his face is just 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

- why are emojis so goddamn funny. they're the stupidest shits ever but i love them so much

- ANYWAYS!

- you go to your room and unpack and everything and yeahyeah whatever

- btw tony Knows you so when he first moved into the headquarters he immediately set aside a room for you with a view he knew you'd love and like all ur favorite things (posters, comfy bed and pillows and blankets, any instruments u like to play etc) because Uncle Tony is Bae Man

- then tony like sticks his head in and knocks on the doorframe

- ur like "hola!" (soy dora!)

- is that what she says? fuck idk i didn't take spanish and have the memory of a breadcrumb anyways!

"y/n i think you made my intern fall in love with you"

- bro Huh?????????/

- cute random slash ryn! Very Good At Typing!

"what on earth do you mean?"

- on the inside though ur like YEAHYEAH

- MOVING ON I'M GETTING A BIT DETAILED AND IT'S CONFUSING MY DICKHEAD OF A BRAIN

- you and tony get cheeseburgers yeahyeah okay

- so you have the whole week in nyc right

- guess what

- guess

- the fuck

- what

- can i just make my goddamn point already goodness gracious

- these hcs are literally me just writing down every single thought i have while writing these

- you guys do be living rent free in my brain 0_0

- OH MY GOD ANYWAYS

- you best BELIEVE peter is at headquarters

- every

- fucking

- day

- YEAHYEAH

- now the whole reason for that is

- when you got back from the Cheeseburger Extravaganza! tony called peter and was like

"sup bitch"

- i'm kidding

"kid listen my niece needs a friend and at this point maybe even a boyfriend. she hasn't managed to pull anyone yet and you'd be a nice fit ANYWAYS come over tomorrow and show her around new york"

- now, hearing this, peter cannot breathe

- internal monologue be like holyhdhdjhksjdbfhitshitskjfdbjfk

- basically me

- my thoughts

- ✨always✨

- the inner snape in me just came out SORRY

- I JUST MADE MY SCREEN SMALL WHAT THEFUDBS

- oh i fixed it

- okay so YEAH

- peter wakes up next morning and pays SO MUCH ATTENTION TO THE WAY HE LOOKS

- puts on his best science pun tee (i love him so much wtf) and makes sure his hair is just right

- aunt may is like o_0

- Hmm...... something Hinky is going on!

(once you get your bearings, find the carpet that covers the taillight, peel back the carpet, make a fist, punch the taillight out the back of the car, thus creating a hole in the back of the automobile, then stick your little hand out and wave to oncoming motorists to let them know that something hinky is going on!)

- bae man john mulaney

- i can't hear or even fucking THINK of the word hinky without thinking of detective jj bittenbinder STREETSMARTS

- shut up! you're all gonna dieSTREETSMARTS

- guys i'm starting to think i have ADHD

- oh my god okay BACK TO THE FUCKING STORY COME ON KAMRYN

- writing my full/actual name on here felt weird as fuck. dunno how often i'll be doing that okay anyways

- peter gets to headquarters and is immediately met by thor

"ah, the spider!"

0_0

"sir stark said something about you coming today to show madam y/n around the city!"

- thor gives peter the biggest pat on the back and peter Does Not Know How To Act

"uh, yeah, that's um.. that's what i'm doing"

- thor smiles (the smile he gives hulk in that one scene in ragnarok makes me LOSE MY MIND it's so FUNNY)

- can my cat stop rubbing her face on my laptop goddamn

- I MADE MY SCREEN SMALL AGAIN WTF

- okay reset ANYWAYS

- take a shot every time i say anyways

- hi i'm editing this imagine rn and according to ctrl+f i wrote "anyways" 20 times. time to get blackout drunk and chug a bottle of perfume everyone!

- Not Me with the john mulaney reference Again!

- thor's like "go get em kid"

- peters like "y-yeah thanks"

- gets in the elevator and he's still so flustered and confused and anxious

- his voice fucking CRACKS when he asks friday to take him to your floor

- why is it so cute when boys' voices crack wtf

- when he reaches ur door his heart is like WANNA SEE SUM REAL SPEED? 4.0

- he just knocks quietly and ur like "yeah?"

- ohgodohfuckohgodohfuckohgodohfuck

- peter opens the door and the LOOK ON HIS FACE

- he (⊙ˍ⊙)

- as soon as you see him you go into Fight Or Flight ur like (ง •_•)ง...?

- but u regain ur composure cause ur a stark 😎

"oh, hi peter!"

"hey, um,"

- he like slowly walks in

- mans is So Unsure of what he's allowed to do

- ur just like My Man it is OKAY

"mr. stark- your uncle-"

- yes peter i know hes my uncle

"so i said to her, 'we've been married for three and a half years.' and she knew that."

no i will not stop with the john mulaney quotes do not even try me (Do Not Fuck With Me)

"told me to show you around new york today"

- ur like O Shit Okay?

- you already know tony is tryna pull some SHIT because this is deadass like the idk..... at LEAST tenth time you've been to new york??????

- you tell peter you'll be ready in a few and he just cautiously sits on your bed cause he's so unsure of everything (babey)

- the two of you talk about the whole story about you and tony and stuff

"so yeah then he moved to new york and i've just been visiting him for a week once a year"

"wait"

- you look over, aggressively shoving on ur shoes and peter's just Thinking

"if you've been here before then why does mr. stark want me to show you around"

- you shrug

"he's weird like that"

- so ANYWAYS (take a shot!)

- ur ready n stuff so the two of you leave

- sam is being himself ofc so he starts clapping for the two of you and whooping as you walk past

- bucky starts clapping too but he doesn't know what he's clapping for so he's just looking around like o_0? 👏

- (he eventually sees the two of you though and smiles SO BRIGHT)

- sam's like

"I KNOW THE TWO OF YOU JUST MET BUT DAMN Y/N'S BEEN NEEDING A MAN!"

- you turn and almost beat the Fuck out of that bird-man ur like:

┗|｀O′|┛

- WHY IS THT SO FUNYNJFDN

we ┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛

WHAT THE FUCKDBGKDJFGNSKDJFNHEHAHHFSBJDFA

┗|｀O′|┛I'M WALKIN HERE!

- oh my god ANYWAYS (TAKE A SHOT)

- tony just chillin in the back with a smug look on his face

- so you guys just start walking through the streets and peter just points out random things

"this is where an old lady gave me a churro"

"right up there is where i did a flip for this guy at a hot dog cart"

"i hung a bike robber right here- oh shoot well like i didn't hang him but i like suspended him in the air.. with my web.... if you, uh, know what i'm sayingi'mgonnastoptalkingnow"

- ur like bitch if you keep acting like this (aka like yourself) imma start Acting Up

- it's Too Cute

- the two of you take the subway to get to queens so he can show you around His Area Of New York

- which is a whole experience cause it's

- the fucking

- subway

- in new york

- you see a subway rat and you get SO EXCITED

- the fucking brightest smile is on your face and peter just looks at you in awe because it's a fucking rat but for some reason you got so happy over it???????

- the subway car was PACKED AS HELL (aka peter. we all know it)

- (there's NO WAY peter's dick is small moving on)

- so the two of you are forced to hold onto the pole things

- and since cali doesn't have subways and subway poles are not something you generally see

- does it? i've never fucking been there i shouldn't be spitting facts that probably aren't actually facts

- for the sake of this imagine california does not have subways

😌

- you decide to Pull a Move and fucking wrap your leg around it, laughing as you spin slightly

- very ungracefully might i add

- we're talking about y/n. the Clumsy Messy Hair Bitch from every goddamn book on this app

- can we talk about how y/n is a whole ass character. like ask anyone who reads fanfic to describe y/n and they Would Not describe themselves DESPITE THE FACT THAT Y/N LITERALLY MEANS "YOUR NAME"

- anyways (two shots of vodka *glug glug*)

- peter gets slightly flustered at your stripper move but covers it up with a laugh

- something about The Way peter's holding onto the pole above ur head is VERY ATTRACTIVE

- now is the time to go look back at the gif i used for this imagine

"what's a camera like you doing in a place like this?"

- fuck you tom for being cute shut up

- the car stumbles and

- CLICHE MOMENT ALERT y'all know what's going on

- you stumble slightly and peter (speedy spidey reflexes) quickly grabs you by the waist to steady you

- AWKWARD MOMENT

- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"thanks"

"oh- yeah, uh, no problem"

- he like... awkwardly pulls his hand away from your waist and suddenly his hand feels like a fucking lead balloon with No Purpose so he just stuffs it in his pocket because Pockets!

- you lowkey wish he'd kept his hand on your waist OOPS

- we desperate for human contact 😔

- the two of y'all get off the subway at his stop and as soon as you step out into the like Actual Street or Whatever you're like 😀 cause it's so PRETTY and it's peter's home so it's even more exciting

- you get lunch at delmar's (ofc)

- mr delmar kept making suggestive eyes between the two of you so you were like o_0

- but it was SO CUTE BECAUSE PETER AND MR DELMAR JUST HAD SUCH A CUTE RELATIONSHIP TOGETHER

- AND FUCKING MR DELMAR HAD THE BALLS TO GO

"supongo que ya no preguntarás por mi hija, eh?"

- WHICH

- IF YOU DON'T SPEAK SPANISH CAUSE I SURE AS HELL DON'T

- thank u google translate for the assistance😌

- TRANSLATES TO "guess you won't be asking about my daughter anymore, huh?"

como estas tu hija eh?

that'll be ten dollars

IT'S FIVE DOLLARS

- anyways (shots! shots! shots shots shots shots! shots!)

- ur like Bro Huh and peter's like NOTHING

- and fucking 🅱ETER

- this BITCH

- ALSO HAD THE BALLS TO FUCKING REPLY IN SPANISH

"ella es la hija del señor stark" (she's mr. stark's daughter)

- ngl you couldn't breathe for a second

- cause who The Fuck can when 🅱eter 🅱ucking 🅱arker speaks ESPAÑOL

- ????????????? WHO

- moving on (not saying a****** to give you a break from the shots you're welcome)

- you get your sandwiches and they fucking SLAP

- peter smiles SO HARD WHEN HE SEES YOUR REACTION CAUSE HE'S SO EXCITED THAT YOU LIKE HIS FAVORITE SANDWICH (not you saying "i'll have what he has" just because you were too busy thinking about him speaking spanish oops)

- the two of you share a bag of gummy worms

- overall 11/10 experience

- i got a bit carried away with that and we're running on over 3000 (rip) words here so i'm gonna hurry this up goodness fuck

- editing ryn here to say HAHA 3000 words little did i Fucking Know

- the two of you get back to headquarters and peter DROPS YOU OFF AT YOUR ROOM LIKE THE GENTLEMAN HE IS AND IT'S KINDA AWKWARD BECAUSE HOW ON EARTH WOULDN'T IT BE BUT HE'S SO CUTE SO IT'S OKAY

- ngl you lay on your bed for a second like "wait was that a date?"

- peter legit just walks to the end of the hallway before closing his eyes and leaning back against the wall, letting out a sigh

- he's like holy shit i need to stop getting so whipped over girls within less than 24 hours

- then fucking sir STANK rounds the corner

"hey, pete! how was showing short-circuit around?"

"oh, hi, uh, it was good"

- this boy is fucking Flustered As Hell

"good? good. what'd y'all do?"

"we, just, um, walked around and i showed her around queens, too"

- tony just looks at him for a second and is like damn this kid needs a break i'll lay off of him

- so like the Cool Guy he is he like awkwardly pats peter on the shoulder and walks over to your room

- u and tones have a convo about your day and you end up gushing about it a little bit OOPS

- tony is so proud of himself him and his egotistical ass Goodness

- a n y w a y s  ( t a k e  a  s h o t ! )

- peter ends up coming over everyday because It's Summer! and he has No Life!

- just thought i'd let you know that i have spent the last couple days binge watching bestdressed's videos and now everything i write down is being narrated by ashley

- actually fuck that everything i THINK is narrated by ashley

- also can we gush about her in the comments like she seems like the coolest person ever and like the big sister i never had and she's so open about her life and funny and quirky but in a good way and i just have So Much Respect For Her!!!!!!!!!!!

- and i want her apartment SO BAD I'M LITERALLY OBSESSED WITH IT

- THE FUCKING FIRE ESCAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- not me having a weird obsession with fire escapes ever since reading/writing peter parker fics which tend to involve them in some way or another

- SO YEAH peter's hanging around a lot

- at first it's a bit weird cause you're like..... You Don't Live Here.....??????????? but At This Point You Almost Do????????????????

- AIN'T NO COMPLAINTS THOUGH

- the two of you break the ice pretty quick

- the night of the day after peter showed you around (did that make any sense at all probably not) you were just chilling in your room watching uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

- let me think rq

- um okay uhhhhhh (bonus points to you if you read that in peter's voice)

- OKAY SO YOU'RE WATCHING LADY BIRD (bomb movie)

- fun fact time! i like saying "what you do is very baller" at random times because idk why but that line makes me laugh SO HARD

- timothee's character in general was just..... so............

- ????????????

- yeah so you're watching lady bird and peter passes your doorway cause he was "going on a walk"

- headass

- you see him and ur like o_0

"peter?"

- bitch fucking TRIPS

- oh u got me trippinnnnn oh stumblinnnnn oh flippinnnnnnn oh fumblinnnn oh

- clumsy cause i'm falling in ~love~

- are those the right lyrics? eh whatever

- CANADA EH

ah the serotonin.. okay MOVING ON

"y-yeah? oH hi y/n didntuhhhhhhh didn't see you there"

- he's casually scratching the back of his neck because he's nervy

"yeah, i'm, um..."

- YOU'RE NERVY TOO

- composure equals regained though bc stark. yeah!

- my thoughts are........ incoherent

"i'm watching lady bird, uh, if you wanna join"

- WATCH A MOVIE?

- WITH YOU?????????????????

- hells yeah!

"o-oh, yeah, sure"

- mans awkwardly waddles in and sits at the edge of your bed

"you can like... lay down, peter. i don't bite"

- he just awkwardly lays down and his side lightly presses against yours

- you have to shut your eyes for a second because MAN does unexpected contact from a boy have such a big effect on you

- not even kidding one of my guy friends patted me on the head as he walked past my desk and i DEADASS GOT BUTTERFLIES I WAS SO ASHAMED

- LIKE WHAT THE FUCK WHO ALLOWED THAT ???????????????

- so anyways (🥂)

- why isn't there a shot glass emoji this is discrimination (i'm kidding)

- the movie was great like

- you and peter would just laugh at random parts and eventually just started critiquing every little moment

- it ended up as a very great moment very nice very cool

- we like furthering our relationships with cute boys :D

- those of you who have been following the story (on my message board) abt the boy i'm talking to aka furthering my relationship with... yeahyeah!

- essentially you and peter start hanging out every day

- the Chemistry you have is Unmatched

- like you just clicked really well

- mainly y'all just watch tv in the commons

- you binge watch i'm not okay with this even though you've already seen it

- peter's like "so why do you like this show so much?"

- ur like 0_0 ... "the plot"

THE PLOT IN QUESTION: stanley barber

- who happens to give me peter parker vibes a little bit

- food network turns on and it takes you like five minutes tops to migrate to the kitchen

- the brownies y'all made did not turn out well

- bucky took a bite, made a face, then smirked

"you two put weed in here?"

- no, bitch, we just suck at baking

- lots of late night convos ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

- BIG ICEBREAKERS THERE

"wait so like... how big do you expect our dicks to be"

"peter what the fuck"

"i'm curious!"

- if you haven't had one of those convos with someone of the opposite gender... You Haven't Lived

- also why do guys like talking about their dicks so much???? the amount of comments they make about them during those convos.. meanwhile i'm just trying to figure out their personality 😔

- the two of you even spend time in the lab together

- this is when he sees ~short-circuit~ in action

- y'all are doing some dumbass experiment idk

- OOH IDEA

- so y'all are making ✨something✨ for an upgrade on peter's suit

- my idea was only half developed don't make fun of me

- and you make a Stunning Realization and fucking SPIN around in your chair to face peter

- ur just rambling making science-y smart connections and peters like holy shit she's a fucking genius of course she is how on earth did she just

- and then as you get further into your discovery you suddenly just cut off and stare into the distance with this Super Serious Look on your face

- THE WAY THAT AS I WROTE "SUPER" 1D WENT "I CAN'T BE NO SUPERMAN"

(but for you i'll be superhuman!)

- then you just SPIN AROUND in your chair and start working on the suit again

- peter's just like 0_0 for a moment

"huh, okay"

- it takes you a few seconds to realize he even said anything but then you look up and ur like 0_0 (we're gonna have to start taking a shot every time i use that face goodness fuck)

"what?"

"you short-circuited!"

- he's all giddy and smiley about it too cause he FINALLY UNDERSTANDS

"shut up, parker"

- peter Totally has a thing for being called parker i just know it

- MY CAT JUST JUMPED UP AND CLAWED ME

- greedy bitch

- AS I WAS SAYING...

- once you get in the ~thing~ that you designed for the suit

- okay i really need to think of an actual upgrade give me a min

- OKAY SO YOU MADE A VOICE CHANGER

- wow very cool, me! innovation that Excites!

- we're just gonna ignore the fact that the interrogation protocol has a voice changer got it? yeahyeah

- peter's like No Way when you tell him you finished it

- you slip on the mask and tell karen to activate the Grown Man Protocol (not peter being offended by the name)

- you start talking and immediately BUST OUT LAUGHING because you sound like Siri

- and since you're Hella Genius you made it so you could change the voices just like how siri is

- so suddenly you're a BRITISH MAN

- you and peter can't stop laughing

- you give it to peter and then you're like

"wait no try it on with the suit too"

- peter's like o_0?

"for effect!"

- walter beckett?

- TOM?

- okay whatever

- peter's like

"okay um i'm just gonna uh... change over here"

- you nod and turn around

- just the sound of his clothes hitting the ground itself gives you butterflies

- and then you realize

- you can deadass See Him Through The Reflection Of The Microscope

- is that even possible? for the sake of this imagine Yes

- your face gets SO HOT

- it's a very small reflective area thing so not a lot of detail but ENOUGH TO SHOW HIS TONED SEXY ASS PHYSIQUE

- fucking crush me peter please i beg it would be an honor

"i want you to do it so i can stomp you with my hooves, i'm so fucking crazy"

- (crazy for you, peter!)

"okay it's on"

- you practically BLAST around in your seat because the VOICE IS WORKING AND IT'S STILL BRITISH

- peter your tom is showing

- ngl though you couldn't stop thinking about how peter looked through the reflection and you didn't even want to THINK about how he would look-

...

- you know

- in all actuality you did want to think about it like think about it for literally the rest of your life if you could but we're gonna ignore that

- nonetheless the experience was Muy Bueno Very Fun and you and peter spent a solid hour just messing with the voices

- ALSO!!!!!!!!!! another plotline: WHEN PETER'S AT HEADQUARTERS FOR A LEGITIMATE REASON

- that reason being training

- let me just say

- even though he only trained twice during ur visit

- you fucking CHERISHED those moments

- because when peter told you the night before his training session that he would be training in the morning you were like Hmm...... I Need To See This

- so you deadass "take a walk" (Very Peter Of You) by the training room

- and ur met with the sight of this:

i hate him so fucking much

who the FUCK ALLOWED THIS i can't breathe

- you definitely take out your phone to snap a few pics DON'T EVEN LIE TO ME YOU WOULD

- ur camera is on live mode too 😌

- then you run away before you get caught but DAMN

- when you go back to your room you just Inspect those pics like a crazy person and keep replaying the live

- then u look at the time

"friday, when does peter's training end?"

"peter parker's training is scheduled to finish in two minutes"

- TWO MINUTES?

- SAY LESS!

- you check yourself in the mirror before ZOOMING downstairs and distracting yourself in the kitchen

- silently thanking the gods (thor?) that no one was in the kitchen when you got there

- (hi i'm getting carried away with this mini plot so just like don't mind it)

- (carried away as in i really really did get carried away LOL)

- you're like what the fuck i can't just Stand Here in the Middle of the Kitchen so you grab some strawberries from the refrigerator and start cutting them up (they just Taste Better that way don't fight me) for a "snack"

THE SNACK IN QUESTION: peter

- yeah ❤

- just as you pop one into your mouth peter walks in to get a glass of water

- now let me just set the scene:

you: mouth in a weird 'o' shape as your mouth forgets how to chew because fucking peter just walked in peter: curly hair a sweaty mess, skin glistening with sweat, wearing black shorts and a gray tank top which Just Fucking Ends You, his usual adorable baby face, oh and he's also panting cause he's fucking exhausted and now you're also out of breath because damn that is Hot strawberries: chopped

"oh, hi y/n"

- the fucking PANTING

- why is breathing heavy so hot?

- i think we all know

"hey, peter"

- shoutout to your stark genes for giving you fake confidence whenever you need it

"want any strawberries?"

- he fucking chugs half of his water just Right In Front Of You

the jawline i hate him so much can he shut up right now like genuinely please shut the fuck up goodness fucking gracious tom

jk please step on me

- he swallows and has Finally Caught his Breath

"oh, yeah, thank you"

- he just walks over to you

- as if he doesn't look the way he does

- and just grabs a strawberry and pops it into his mouth

- nonchalantly or whatever

- you pray to THOR he can't hear your heart as it fucking SLAMS AGAINST YOUR STERNUM

- it's beating so fast it's like LET ME OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- he hums

"strawberries taste so much better after training"

- you know what would taste better after training?

- lol

"thank you for the snack, i'm gonna go shower now"

- he elbows you and smiles lightly

- you almost can't speak because it's all Far Too Much for you to handle rn

"no problem, peter"

- as if you weren't having a heart attack okay

- i really got caught up in that but WHATEVER

- ladies and gents we are running on over 5k words at this point holy shit

- SO I'M GONNA START WRAPPING THIS UP A LITTLE

- basically you and peter become good friends by the end of your trip

- and then

- the dreaded

😔

- time to leave, bros

- the night before is kinda weird cause you and peter are just hanging out on the roof of headquarters because why not

"leaving new york usually doesn't feel as weird as this"

- peter looks over at you

- btw at this point 🅱eter is Beyond Whipped so he's fucking SAD that you're going home

"what do you mean?"

- the two of you share a look and it's very sad because you both know that you've become really good friends and both want a bit more

- part of you considers being a baddie and just trying to like at LEAST kiss him tonight (maybe more wink wink) so you could at least have that before you go but you chicken out

- the two of you say goodbye that night because your flight is at the Crack of Dawn

- he awkwardly pulls you in for a hug and suddenly you deeply consider locking yourself in your room so nobody can make you leave

- and then you remember vision can fucking Hover through walls and you're like Well Damn!

- you hug him tightly (a bit too tight yeah maybe)

- when you pull apart this Bitch literally goes

"well it was nice meeting you"

- you CAN'T FUCKING HOLD IT IN AND JUST MAKE THE MOST OBSCENE LAUGHING NOISE

"peter we spent a week together and you're acting like we had a 5 minute encounter"

"i don't know how to act!"

- me neither, peter. me neither

- so you leave in the morning and you're fucking UPSET

- tony is in the car with you and happy and he WONT STOP TALKING ABOUT YOU AND PETER BECAUSE YOU SPENT AT LEAST HALF OF YOUR TIME WITH HIM

- YOU'RE LIKE SHUT UP I'M GOING THROUGH A HEARTBREAK OVER A BOY I'VE KNOWN FOR SEVEN DAYS

- aren't we all

- your goodbye to tony is sad but like Not Even As Sad as your goodbye with peter which is KINDA MESSED UP BUT

- the heart wants what it wants

- and just when you get on the plane

- is when you realize

- you and peter didn't get each other's numbers

...

- Wtf 💔

- so THE WHOLE PLANE RIDE IS SAD

- YOU LISTEN TO MUSIC AND DRAMATICALLY LOOK OUT THE WINDOW LIKE UR IN A SAD MUSIC VIDEO FOR HALF THE FLIGHT

- YOU ALSO REWATCH LADY BIRD :,(((((((((((((((((((((((( in remembrance of the good old times

- when you get home you're like kinda happy to be home but you miss new york and tony and peter and everyone So Much

- even ur mom notices she's like 🤨 Hmm... this Ain't The Usual!

- so this is where the request ended off but i'm adding to it because i do Not want to leave this on an angsty note

- I'M ABOUT TO HIT 6K WORDS BUT IT'S FINE

- LET'S CRANK THIS OUT WOOT WOOT

- so peter just so happens to wake up that morning and SIT UP VERY QUICKLY AS IT HITS HIM

- (ur like on ur flight probably zooming over the Goddamn Midwest)

- he has the same realization that you did

"may!"

- the woman RUNS in she's like WHATISEVERYTHINGOKAYAREYOUOKAY

"i just realized i didn't get y/n's number"

- woman melts she's like i thought you were fucking DYING goddamn spider bitch boy

- but then she melts even more because she didn't even need peter to tell her how Whipped he is

"awh, i'm sorry hon"

- next time peter goes to headquarters he talks to tony and the mans just like This Is Your Fault!

- but then nat pops in

"peter, you do realize you could probably find her on social media, right"

- moment of silence for you and peter's stupidity because somehow Neither Of You Thought Of That???????????

- rip

- as soon as he leaves from training (looking Sexy As Hell) he searches your name on instagram

- "y/n stark"

- and nothing shows up

- because you never told him your actual last name because IT NEVER CAME UP

- he just assumed it was stark cause why wouldn't he

- SO HE'S LIKE :,)

- until his next time at headquarters

"mr. stark i couldn't find her on instagram"

- tony's like i really got this kid hooked huh

"pretty sure she has one, pete"

"well i looked her up! y/n stark. nothing"

- then tony's like oHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"kid, her last name's l/n."

- peter just sits there like 0_0 for a second before it all ties together in his head and makes sense

"oh my god"

- SO HE GETS YOUR INSTAGRAM

- he definitely looks through all his posts and deletes a few embarrassing ones before requesting to follow you

INSTAGRAM peterbparker has requested to follow you.

- you SHOOT UP IN YOUR BED

- NOBODY MOVE

- you do the same thing peter did and look through all your posts and delete a few before accepting his request

- and then you request back and he immediately accepts it

- commence the hour of stalking!

- the two of you just fucking Investigate each others' accounts before peter's like O Shit! i should Probably message her!

peterbparker: Right after you left I realized I forgot to get your number

- kinda awkward but your heart is RACING you're like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- the two of you begin talking and get each other's numbers and snapchats and whatever

- over time the two of you get really close over the internet like

- you become the first ones you go to when you see a dog or get food at a cool place or see a funny meme/tiktok or just like have a problem in general or want to talk

- and ofc you gush about him to your friends and they're like

- Girl... u really fell for a New York Boy Huh

- after a few months you finally muster up the courage to facetime him

- you almost Collapse once his face shows up because guess the fuck what

- he just finished training

- mua ha haaaa

"hello!"

- he says it all goofy like hi hello we're facetiming now holy shit oh FUCK we're FACETIMING!!!!!!?????!?!?!?!?

- i luv him

- the two of you talk for a bit and you fan yourself off-screen because the sight of him Genuinely made you light on fire and plus you were just nervous in general

- he even runs around the entire fucking building to find everyone so you can say hi cause he's babey

- the team DEFINITELY yells stuff like "lovebirds!" and "date already!" in the background and peter's face just gets So Red

- he finds tony and deadass goes

"mr. stark! it's your niece!"

- tony's like No Shit!

- overall amazing 100/10 time facetiming

- so the two of you start facetiming practically every day even though it's not summer anymore and you're back in school and have hella busy lives (peter's literally a superhero?)

- you'll facetime while doing homework and he'll help you with physics (even though you don't really need the help you pretend you do anyways) and it's so cute when he does because he Loves physics so much so he gets really excited and into it

- sometimes you'll fall asleep while on ft and he'll take screenshots

- ngl he set his favorite one as his lockscreen because he loved it so much and ned and mj definitely saw it and were lowkey like 🥺🥺 cause they ship you two so hard

- and when he'd fall asleep on ft you'd take screenshots too and look at them every time you missed him

- NOW THE EXCITING PART

- so it's winter now

- the Horrible Disgusting period between thanksgiving and christmas break

- because of finals the two of you facetime a bit less so it's kinda sad

- BUT THEN

- right when you get out of school for christmas break you're about to call peter so the two of you can celebrate (not peter checking the time every few minutes after he got out of school because he's a couple hours ahead)

- somebody's got a surprise

- you get a call from peter right when you get into your car and you're like Perfect Timing Hell Yeah

- you answer it and are met with the sight of him and tony smiling at the camera

*immediately screenshots it*

"oh, hi tony!"

"we have a surprise"

- peter's like bouncing from excitement and tony gives him a look before starting to talk

"we're fl-"

"WE'RE FLYING YOU TO NEW YORK FOR CHRISTMAS!"

- peter interrupts and tony looks so defeated but YOU BARELY EVEN NOTICE BECAUSE YOU'RE SO EXCITED

- tony explains everything cause he worked it out with your parents (y'all are just gonna celebrate early)

- (tony doesn't say this but deadass the reason ur parents even let you is because they know how much you wanna go back mainly to see peter)

- eventually tony leaves the two of you alone to talk and you're just in your car in the school parking lot practically yelling at your phone as you and peter talk about how excited you are

"and you can finally meet may-"

"may!"

"yes, may! and we can go back to delmar's and see murph-"

"murph!"

- peter can't stop smiling cause you're so excited and you look so cute cause you're Trying Your Best to get out of the parking lot while maintaining excitement

"can we go see times sq- MOTHERFUCKER GET OUT OF THE WAY JESUS CHRI- sorry peter i didn't mean to explode"

- if anything that made you even cuter in his eyes

- you and peter facetime while you pack and neither of you can handle your excitement AT ALL

- the night before you leave you're both in your beds across the country just talking quietly to each other over the phone and it's like the quiet cute excitement because you're seeing each other in less than 24 hours and you're both so so whipped by each other and just Cannot Wait

- it's really late ESPECIALLY for peter since he's ahead of you but he doesn't care at ALL

- so y'all are just whispering to each other

"i'm so excited, pete"

"i know, me too"

"i'm not gonna know how to act"

"me neither. you're not allowed to make fun of how awkward i am, okay?"

"peter, you being awkward is cute"

- the two of you can barely sleep from excitement but you fall asleep (on ft ofc) with smiles on your faces

- as soon as you wake up you text peter and you're like GO GO GO (spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬)

- you call him one last time while you're waiting at the gate

"i think i'm gonna pee myself"

"well if you do at least clean yourself up before i get there"

- his LAUGH

- the boyish laugh that FUcking Ends Me

"i'm still so amazed at how i managed to convince mr. stark to let me pick you up"

- you can't stop smiling especially at the thought of peter DRIVING (hot as FUCK)

"you'd better be a good driver, peter"

"it's fine, the car has autopilot so we won't die"

"glad to hear it, pete- oh sHIT my plane's boarding"

- peter FREAKS OUT

"have a safe and amazing flight and text me when you land, okay?"

"i will peter, thank you. see you in new york"

"see you in new york"

- y'all say that in the most Giddy Way (literally how could you not)

- you're bouncing in your seat the whole flight and the dude next to you is like o_0

- the SECOND you land you text peter

y/n: IM HERE IM HERE WE JUST LANDED ILL BE OFF THE PLANE IN A FEW MINUTES

- peter's sitting in this Far Too Expensive Car and he's just bouncing in his seat cause he has so much pent up energy

- he gets the text and that's when it really settles in

- he starts freaking out a little and like constantly checks himself in the rearview mirror and starts playing the playlist the two of you made together (puppy eyes) and makes sure he smells good

- then he sees you walk out out of the airport looking really excited and tired and confused

- mans JUMPS OUT OF THE CAR

"y/n!"

- you see him and ur literally smiling SO HARD

- you run at him, suitcase flopping around and backpack nearly falling off of your shoulders

- but you look so cute and peter can't handle it especially when the two of you finally make contact and your arms wrap around him

- he squeezes you so tight and even lifts you off the ground cause he's Strong and Excited

- that sounded a bit sexual OOPS

- you can't even process the fact that you're finally back in peter's arms after half a year and now you're literally so much closer than you were when you left new york last summer

- when you pull apart you can't stop looking at each other and just smiling giddily

- your arms are still like holding onto each other

- what finally breaks you is a fucking Ungodly gust of wind and you're like

"holy shit winter here is a lot colder than cali"

"oH, right, uh we have blankets in the car"

- the two of you just take another few seconds to look at each other until it gets a bit awkward and you clear your throats

"i can take your bag?"

"yeah, thanks"

- you watch his muscles flex as he lifts your suitcase into the back and you're like i hate this man

- this GENTLEMAN even RUNS OVER TO YOUR SIDE AND OPENS YOUR DOOR FOR YOU BEFORE YOU GET THE CHANCE

- you MELT

- when you sit down he closes the door for you and you're hit with the sound of your shared playlist and the car smells like peter's scent and it's AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- when he gets into the driver seat (which was very attractive to watch) you're just staring at him excitedly

"you put on our playlist!"

"why wouldn't i?"

- he smiles at you before reaching back and getting the blankets for you, also turning on your seat heater to make sure you're comfy

- mans just watches you as you shift around, buckling in and getting your backpack situated at your feet

- by the time you're all ready and stuff you look over and he's just looking at you

"pete-"

"would it be too soon for me to kiss you?"

- AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- it takes you a second to process but you're like OH MY GODKFSDKNFSK

"yeah, peter, it would"

- your serious tone RUINS PETER

- HE'S LIKE OH MY GOD WHY DID I ASK THAT WHY DO I EXIST

- until you laugh and wrap a hand around the back of his neck, pulling him to you and planting your lips on his

- (AAAAAAAAAAHDKSJDFHSKJDFBKSDJGNSDKJFNADSJKABBJFS)

- bonus: the two of you are just singing in the car and (peter looks so hot when he's driving anyways) peter suddenly goes silent and you're like "what" and he just glances at you before going "is it bad that i really want to pull over so i can kiss you again?"

- double bonus: he pulls over and y'all makeout LOL

+ + +

holy FUCK i got so so carried away but i really like this one soooooo

OKAY HERE'S MY LITTLE THANK YOU NOTE IN HONOR OF THE 50TH IMAGINE AAAAAAAAAA: you GUYS. when i started this book it was literally just me being like "i'm in love with this fictional boy and need an outlet and have FAR too many ideas," which is really how every fanfic writer starts tbh. but oh my god, i never expected to get so much love and support and just such an amazing experience from this. there are people all over the world that read my chaotic fluffy shit, that are actually touched by my work and it legitimately blows my mind. 180k reads in almost a year? like 250 followers? INSANE. i've made so many friends on here that i can come to when i have no one in my real life to talk to and every time i reach out, you guys are here for me and so incredibly supportive and helpful and amazing. i love each and every comment you guys post on my works. they make me laugh so hard and are so beyond sweet and make my heart melt. some of them blow my mind cause you guys will be like "omg hi you responded oh my god i love your work" and like hype me so much and i'm like BRUH!!!! i'm literally just a stressed out, anxiety ridden teenage girl in love with peter parker lol and the fact that you guys support me so much and love my work just truly makes me so happy. i love writing and i love that my writing has reached other people, even if it's literally just silly fanfiction. I APPRECIATE AND LOVE YOU GUYS WITH EVERYTHING IN ME AND EVEN IF I DON'T REPLY TO YOUR COMMENT I SEE IT AND YOU GUYS MAKE ME SMILE AND AAAAAAAAAAAKJSDFNKJDF <33333333333333

okay now i have 5 more requests to write HAHA but i hope u guys are having an amazing day/night/whatever and that ur drinking enough water and eating enough and staying happy and healthy <3 MWAH!

[demaury]

the best of me (chap.2)

“If anything bad happens I flush the rings, I leave my bestman spot to Baz, and I fly back to Paris.“

OR. Eliott and Lucas have never worked up the courage to actually make a move, and thus spent years dancing around each other without ever acknowledging their feelings. However, an engagement party gone a little too wild, an hotel room and a very bad idea might be all it takes to make everything blow up. (read on ao3)

“LALLEMANT’S HERE.”

Lucas should have known that having Arthur and Basile at the same time around a pool wasn’t a good idea, yet it wasn’t until he heard his two friends wail as soon as he set a foot on the deck installed on the rooftop that he realized it was a completely fucked up idea. He barely had any second to blink before two pairs of arms grabbed him like vices; next thing he knew he was sputtering water after getting back to the surface.

At least he had the bright idea to change into swim trunks before coming there.

Bless him.

“You,” he scowled, hair dripping all over his face as his two friends were laughing their asses off, “I swear to God you both are dead.”

“Oh, c’mon, don’t say you didn’t expect it,” Arthur snorted, hands falling to his hips.

Lucas lifted himself up onto the edge of the pool in a splash of water, warily accepting the hand Basile landed him. “Astonishingly enough I thought that we were between civilized people. My mistake,” he groaned as he grumpily fistbumped them hello, before going to see the girls.

Only Nola and Manon were there, but he wasn’t surprised since Emma had already been told by the girls herself that Daphné, Alexia and Imane were held back in some shopping session but had promised to run back to the hotel as soon as possible. Yann’s girlfriend-turned-fiancée had been a part of the group for almost two years now, and since she didn’t have a weird obsession with how hot Eliott and Lucas getting it on together would be — Arthur’s ex had one of those and Lucas had wanted to strangle her more times he could count — she had been welcomed to stay. She and Yann had met up through Imane, both working as interns in the same hospital, so it had been easy from there, Lucas could only guess.

“Consider yourself lucky,” Manon pointed out from her spot on one of the deckchairs, closing the book she was reading as she pushed up her sunglasses, “you’ll never have to worry about keeping a wedding dress clean for a whole day with these two around.”

Next to her, Nola paled. “Oh please no.”

“Already talking about wedding dresses but I don’t see any ring yet,��� Arthur snickered.

Nola grinned. “My fiancé couldn’t wait to propose, I guess? We’re gonna go shopping when we get back home.”

Lucas turned to Yann with a shocked expression. “Who does that?”, he scoffed.

They were at the beginning of their relationship. Lucas didn’t know much himself about functioning relationships but he could only guess that technically those kinds of inadvertent dick moves happened later down the road, usually.

Yann looked a bit sheepish. “I wanted her to pick something she likes,” he mumbled. “She’s gonna wear it after all.”

“Didn’t you pick your wedding suit for your dad’s second marriage, like, two days prior or something?” Basile quipped.

“I didn’t want to go,” he grumbled. “That’s different.”

“I don’t think any of us particularly wanted you to livestream us the whole thing but I guess we all take one for the team, uh?” Eliott casually chimed in, joining him on the edge of the pool and letting his long legs dangle in the water.

Since Lucas was mature, and a very functioning adult at that, he stuck his tongue out as a response.

*

“It’s too bad we’re only here for the weekend,” Eliott complained with a sigh as he flopped down onto Emma’s bed. “Remember those three weeks after your BAC?”

Lucas snorted as he kept rummaging through his travel bag, squatting at the foot of his bed. He hadn’t wanted to take everything out but now he was starting to rethink his decision as he exhumed a wrinkled denim button down. Daphné, Basile, Eliott, Yann, Nola, Imane and him had gone out for lunch in a restaurant nearby, while the rest was dispersed in the city to do some shopping, then everyone had flocked back to the hotel and they had spent the better part of the afternoon by the pool occasionally trying to drown each other when they were mostly alone, on the seventh floor. It was the coolest thing Lucas had ever seen. It wasn’t so much that he had never seen something like that before, but he just had a thing for climbing and rooftop activities — back in Paris he had specifically chosen his new flat according to whether or not he had access to the one of his building. And well, also if he could afford it or not, but that was another story.

“We were young and wild and free,” Lucas commented dramatically.

He eventually set the shirt down, before grabbing his travel bag and emptying all of its content on his bed. It wasn’t like Eliott of all people would bat an eye at his calvin kleins. He reached for a pair of black pants finally standing out on the white comforter now that they weren’t lost in the deep end of the bag.

“I’d pick the black shirt,” Eliott said casually.

Lucas quirked a brow at him. “You just say that because it’s the one you bought me.”

Eliott grinned, making his eyes crinkle. “Well, yeah. Precisely,” he said, shrugging a little.

“I’m not going to dress all black, that’s right up your alley,” Lucas quipped.

“I’m trying to bring a little bit more colors, if you must know,” Eliott retorted, tugging at the hem of his light grey tank top as if it was a proof that it was a color. “Besides, the jeans you had this morning were fine, and they would look even finer with the black shirt. Who bought them for you?”

Lucas pondered the question and considered telling him to fuck off, but instead he just sighed. “Manon,” he grumbled, and Eliott started laughing like an asshole. Which was kind of sweet, but vaguely irritating. Lucas glared at him. “Someday I’ll claim back my closet, and you and Manon will finally stop dressing me up like I’m some sort of baby doll.”

“Wrong choice of words on every level.” The bastard smirked cheekily, regardless of the unimpressed look Lucas sent him. “Plus, we dress you up because you’d still be wearing sweatpants to your dates if it weren’t for us meddling in.”

“You’re admitting you’re meddling in, we’re getting at it,” Lucas bit back haughtily.

“Just admit I care about you, you little shit,” Eliott snorted.

Lucas cocked an eyebrow. “What did we say about size jokes?”

“It was a term of endearment,” Eliott protested, sitting up on Emma’s bed and leaning back his weight onto his hands.

It cruelly emphasized the veins on his arms and the sun was shimmering onto his skin and the tattoos he had on the underside of his arm. Not afraid? Not afraid. It had been a recurring joke between them when they were younger (a lifetime ago) and someday Eliott had snapped and just gotten it inked for good. Lucas had almost chocked himself when he had seen it on Instagram.

“And I’m feeling so endeared right now.”

Eliott flipped him off and Lucas chuckled. “Who are you rooming with anyway?”

“Arthur,” Eliott said casually. “Why, needed me to brush your hair?”

“Not really, but who’s gonna read me stories about hedgehogs and raccoons?” Lucas deadpanned.

“Hilarious,” Eliott deadpanned with the same voice.

Lucas laughed and went to push open the bathroom door, then stopped halfway and turned back. “Hey, I was meaning to ask. You still have the address of the tattoo parlor where you got those?”, he asked, gesturing at Eliott’s tattoos with his chin.

Eliott glanced down at his arms, a little bit lost, then he grinned. “No way, you’re gonna get one? After all this time?”

Lucas huffed and shrugged. “Dunno. Maybe? I’ve been thinking, you know. So you still have it or not?”

“Yeah, no problem,” Eliott smiled with a nod. “I’ll send it to you. They’ve got an Instagram page and all, no bad surprise.”

“Nice,” he nodded, almost to himself.

“What are you thinking about getting?” Eliott asked, curious. “If you don’t mind me asking, of course.”

Lucas pondered the question. “It’s not really- I don’t know, I was thinking about maybe getting something about my mom, but it sounds- I don’t know it seems kinda stupid.”

He scrunched his nose, mostly to himself. Now Eliott was gonna imagine him with a real-size portrait of his dead mom tattooed on his chest or something equally weird. All he had thought about so far was something small and rather casual, like a date or something no bigger than that. He had debated for months about it, thinking that it was maybe a bit hypocritical — after all he hadn’t really been the best son towards the end and he still had to live with a sense of relief that had washed over him after she had passed, before the actual pain could settle in — but now he considered that it didn’t mean he couldn’t honor his mom anyway simply because she wasn’t there anymore.

“It’s not stupid if it means something to you,” Eliott said.

Lucas huffed a laugh, which was his number 1 reaction whenever he had shared too much and just wanted it to stop. “Yeah, well, I’m just thinking, you know? Plenty of time for me to chicken out.”

“Not afraid. Remember?”

“Thank you Octavia Blake. I’ll remember that,” he snorted, pushing past the bathroom door.

*

Everything was fine, Lucas thought.

Absolutely, a hundred percent fine. He was fine. Yann was fine. Nola, Imane, Manon, Arthur, Basile, Daphné, Emma, Alexia were all fine. Eliott was fine. And the waiter who had been painstakingly hitting on him for the better part of the past hour was absolutely fine too.

They had all reunited at a bar down the street to get predrinks before hitting the clubs to celebrate, and Lucas was happy about it, he really was. Having all his friends gathered in one place and a free night to remember the good old times, what more could he ask, right? The third time Guillermo or Guz or whatever that stupid nametag read came around and eye-fucked Eliott without even the slightest hint of embarrassment, he genuinely thought he would burst though. The problem wasn’t that anyone was hitting on Eliott — water under the bridge and all — but it was rather that everyone seemed to find it the funniest thing on the goddamn planet.

Daphné certainly didn’t need another umbrella in her stupid cocktail.

Arthur didn’t need a refill.

And no one cared about the goddamn tapas and their fucking recipes.

As soon as the stupid waiter had gone back to the kitchen with a bright smile and a lingering look on Eliott, Emma leaned over the table. “He wants to give you the d so bad,” she grinned devilishly.

Eliott snorted and shook his head, leaning back against the backrest of his chair. “Maybe hookups at the back of a restaurant are your thing but they aren’t mine.”

Yann laughed, making his glass spin a little between his fingers. “Mr. Demaury’s a romantic, we been knew after all.”

“A romantic who’s single and isn’t getting any,” Emma commented, nose in her glass.

“That’s comforting, Emma, thank you.”

The table started laughing, but apparently Emma’s remark had sparked some interest in Daphné’s mind. Lucas knew something stupid would come out of it even before she opened her mouth — it wasn’t that she was stupid, it was just that this whole conversation was.

“She’s got a point,” she said thoughtfully. “You’re like one of the hottest guys I know, don’t tell me you’re still hung up on Macha.”

“Macha’s hot,” Alexia added, widening her eyes comically. “You guys were goals.”

Lucas almost snorted, but managed to hide it behind a coughing fit. Everyone knew that Eliott was bipolar, but he didn’t like to bring it up or to speak about it to all of them; in the end Lucas was generally the only one, sometimes along with Alexia or Basile whenever he needed advises, to know the extent of his low lows. The fact that at least one of Macha (her name was Marie-Charlotte, but beware to your nuts if you dared to call her that) and Eliott’s many breakups had been caused by a tantrum she had thrown because he wasn’t answering her texts fast enough, when he had already made a supreme effort to write her, with words, that he wasn’t feeling alright at the moment, was one of the things that only Lucas knew, and sometimes he wished he could share this information and the resentment towards her without betraying Eliott’s trust.

It was a tough balance to maintain, but he was managing it most of the time.

“Yeah, well. Macha’s busy these days,” Eliott shrugged. “It just wasn’t working with her in Berlin and me in Paris anyway. We’re both better apart.”

“Maybe we should try to set you up instead of trying to set up Lulu,” Basile said. “That’d make for a nice change.”

“I’ve never asked anybody to set me up,” Lucas scoffed.

“My bestman isn’t going to attend my wedding as a single man,” Yann retorted. “If by then you don’t have anybody to rock your nights, I’ll have to provide.”

“You wish you could, Cazas.”

On the other side of the table, Eliott grinned at him with a knowing look. “Spikey much, uh?”

Lucas rolled his eyes and downed his drink when he saw the waiter come back to their table with something they hadn’t even ordered, everyone holding back their breath with conspirator looks.

*

The first club they went to had a fifteen meters queue spilling outside the entrance and the slowest bouncer of the century. It took him an infinite amount of time to decide whether or not the group of five boys at the top of the line should be let in, before eventually deciding to ask them for their IDs. They all pretended to fumble for a while — or maybe they truly were this intoxicated already, hence why reaching for one of the four pockets of their jeans was so hard in the first place. In the meantime, Lucas was repressing the urge of constantly rolling his eyes by chatting away with Alexia and Eliott, until both got hooked by two girls (Dutch, apparently) from the group behind them. It wasn’t like he could really blame them. Eliott was Eliott, and Alexia radiated the cool vibe every single breath she took. It was rather the feeling of being left out that he resented always a little bit more than he was supposed to, and not just because people were hitting on Eliott.

Why should he care, after all?

If Eliott had game, he was happy for him.

Okay, maybe he was a bit upset. For the first time in forever they both happened to be single at the same time, and thus had no one clinging onto them for attention. This time, Lucas was clingy. Problem was, Eliott was one of those people who could fall in love with a doorknob, and when it was paired with good looks and good personality, celibacy wasn’t bound to be Eliott’s strong suit, and up until now Lucas’ theory had been pretty much verified. With a huff to himself he lost interest in trying to keep up with the conversation with the Dutch girls. On his other side, Daphné and Basile were happily sucking faces, which kept grossing Lucas out even after all these years, so he sidestepped them to reach Nola, Imane and Manon and finally find civilized people to talk to.

When they got inside, the club was packed, the walls thrumming to the beat of the music, the air stuffed and the bartenders busy for a while. Arthur, Manon and him lost a few more minutes of their time, trying to get their attention for drinks, while everyone was flocking into a booth somewhere on the side of the dancefloor. Apparently it was vodka night, a weird mix that made the drinks a blue as icy as the neon lights spread everywhere around the club. Two of those helped him relax and enjoy the night, and from his spot in the nearly desert booth his friends had managed to get a grip on, he could see them dancing the night away. Yann and Nola were giggling stupidly while doing those sickeningly couple dance moves, Alexia was busy making out with one of the Dutch girls from before, and Eliott was laughing with some girl in a corner, her extra-long, extra-straight hair cascading to her hips Ariana Grande style.

He blamed it on Emma’s insistence during their flight, on the drinks he already had, on the colors of the neon lights, but suddenly he was sixteen again, and he was kissing Chloé until he jaws hurt, while his eyes were desperately glued to Eliott’s as if he needed those stormy grey pools to breathe. What was that party called again?

Right. Kiffance.

What a joke.

*

He had only scarce memories of the second club, probably because it was not all that different from the first one. The third one, however, was in one of those underground locations that tried so hard to look grunge and hipstery — not like he minded. He was on whatever beverage Basile and Arthur had deemed fit for the occasion, and it tasted a bit weird and was strangely colorless, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as what he feared at fist. The floor swayed a little when he got up, but it was a fun feeling that made him giggle for almost nothing. He felt warm and fuzzy and his accent in English had gotten so thick that he wasn’t sure anyone could get a single word anymore, but it didn’t seem to put off the guy who had pressed him up against the wall a while ago, and who was slowly climbing his way in the top 5 of the best kissers Lucas had come across in a long time. He was kinda hot too, the kind Lucas wouldn’t mind letting in his pants. In their booth, the boys were apparently cheering on him for some reason, and Yann raised his glass to him, making Lucas huffing a little breathy laugh between wet kisses.

When the guy reached for him to drag him in a more secluded corner, he followed suit.

For some reason though, the memory of a pretty brunette with bangs and a chirpy voice stuck at the back of his head while they walked around the dancefloor.

*

What time was it? He had no idea. All he knew was that, while he was making his way back towards the booth after maybe or maybe not giving a blowjob, ‘fuck yes’ was the answer he had given when Arthur had come across him with the promise of some fresh air and some weed. Like the good old times. The air hit him in the face as they got outside through the back door, a welcomed kick he didn’t know he needed that made his head spin a little. They settled against some sort of railing, taking a hit every now and then.

Emma showed up at some point, and Lucas vaguely heard something along the lines of the girls minus Daphné going back to the hotel, and Arthur probably needing to find a place to crash because she was sure she had seen Eliott leave with someone.

Lucas handed the joint to her then went back inside. There was probably some room left in his system for another drink.

*

There was some room left for one, but probably not for three. The fact that the ground now swayed dangerously should have disqualified him from dancing, but the beat was just so alluring and the movement of the other people helped him steady himself and follow — to a certain degree. People and faces and neon lights kept printing themselves a second too long in his brain each time he blinked.

*

He tripped over his own feet in the stairs leading up to the street, nearly falling face first in a fit of giggles. The others were lost to the crowd, for those who still remained at least, and his mind kept skipping what looked like a frame every now and then.

*

Wow, what the fuck, you okay? The voice was familiar. French? Maybe. He didn’t know, and suddenly the brick wall next to him grew alarmingly close.

*

Fuck he was gonna regret this. A giggle burst out of him.

*

Lucas cracked his eyes open with the feeling of rising up from the dead. His brain was fuzzy and his throat dry as a desert, and if there weren’t many pleasant occasions on which those two things gathered at the same time, this one was definitely not one of those. He found himself staring at the void, eyelids heavy, for at least good minute. The blinds hadn’t been shut at all, and apparently all the sunlight in the world had decided to flood in this particular room in order to make his eyeballs melt. With a wince at the pounding headache, he closed his eyes and tried to swallow down some saliva. Which, in fact, wasn’t that good of an idea. Lucas winced some more in disgust at the bad taste, curling a little bit on himself. The question was now how much courage he had left to get up, for a total of three minutes, just enough to grab a glass of water he’d probably apply first thing on his forehead, then go to the bathroom to relieve his bladder from all the liquid he had the night before. Good plan. Good. Plan. That was a good plan, Lucas thought sluggishly. The major flaw was that he didn’t know if his stomach would make it.

Said stomach started gurgling and Lucas felt a chill run up his spine.

Okay. The bladder would wait. It would. He squeezed his eyes shut, digging his face deeper in his pillow. Fuck. How many fucking drinks did he have? He hadn’t had a black-out since college, and now he was starting to remember why he had stopped pushing himself to the breaking point.

Because it fucking sucked afterwards.

A quiet huff echoing in the room and a movement on the other side of the bed made his eyes snap back open, the mattress dipping a little bit.

Oh no.

Oh no, no, no.

He forced his last two surviving braincells to connect together, but his mind was blank. All he could hear was the birds chirping aggressively outside, a few cars passing down the street and someone walking outside the room, feet digging into the thick carpet.

Thomp, thomp, thomp.

He didn’t remember hooking up with anybody. Let alone bringing them back to the hotel afterwards. That being said he didn’t remember much at all in the first place. He tried to scan his memory for any available clue but the only that came to his mind was Yann happily cheering on him for some reason, a very colored cocktail he didn’t remember the name of and-

Oh. Yeah.

He had hooked up with someone. Some guy. In a club.

Now he recalled. He also recalled getting down on his knees and he humfed to himself.

Yeah. Great. He didn’t dare to move now. It wasn’t his first one night stand, don’t get him wrong. He had had his share of those. But rarely ever with a hangover of this magnitude. Fuck he wasn’t in the right state to have the awkward morning after talk. No matter if the guy was all casual about it — they lived in two different countries and Lucas was literally there for two days, it wasn’t like something else would happen anyway. It still felt impossibly awkward regardless and the prospect of dealing with it didn’t help his already unsteady stomach. Particularly when he couldn’t get out. Because it was his room, right? Lucas squinted his eyes. It must be. Who else’s would it be?

It didn’t make sense. He spared a glance around. The armchair in the corner. The table aligned against the wall. The commode with a small tv screen. He could make up the dark shape of a building towering outside, across from the street.

It wasn’t his hotel room, Lucas thought.

Unless they had built whatever that building was last night.

He knew the hoodie thrown carelessly on the armchair though. And the sneakers near the foot of the bed. Heartbeat rising as realization downed on him, Lucas mustered enough courage to sit up, and after taking a deep breath, he turned his head to the other side of the bed, hands clutching at the sheets pooling low around his waist, where Eliott was still dead to the world.

[consultthemuses]

Sentence Meme: 170 Buffy Summers Quotes

Some will be more easily applicable than others. SOME WILL CONTAIN TRIGGERS (violence/blood mentions/supernatural references)!! Feel free to change pronouns/genders at will.

❛ Darn your sinister attraction. ❜

❛ You stabbed [name] to death. What were you trying to do, scratch his back from the front? ❜

❛ Judgemental? If I was any more open-minded about the choices you two make, my whole brain would fall out. ❜

❛ TV is a good thing. Bright colours. Music. Tiny little people. ❜

❛ They never just leave. Always gotta say something. ❜

❛ Oh come on! Stake through the heart, a little sunlight, it's like falling off a log. ❜

❛ I have no time for orders. ❜

❛ [name], when you tried to be head cheerleader, you were bad. When you tried to chair the Homecoming committee, you were really bad. But when you try to be bad ... you suck. ❜

❛ You said it was big. You told me, but you never said it was huge! ❜

❛ He's 243 years old. He doesn't exactly get the prom. ❜

❛ So I'm treated like the baddie, just because he has a sprained wrist and a bloody nose...and I don't have a scratch on me. Which, granted, hurts my case a little, on the surface. ❜

❛ I don't have time for vendettas. The mission is what matters. ❜

❛ What I want is the [name] that's dangerous. The [name] that tried to kill me when we met. ���

❛ Sex and death and love and pain -- it's all the same damn thing to you. ❜

❛ Have you completely lost your mind? ❜

❛ I'm not just some crazy person. I'm the Slayer! ❜

❛ You named your stake? Remind me to get you a stuffed animal. ❜

❛ I'm sixteen years old. I don't wanna die. ❜

❛ It's all [name]’s fault. She's like poison. No, worse, she's like acid that eats through everything. Maybe she's a bomb. ❜

❛ You know, you really should watch your language. Someone didn't know you, they might think you were a woman-hating jerk. ❜

❛ The least you could do is exhibit some casual interest; you can go hmm. ❜

❛ You sounded like Mr. Initiative. Demons bad. People good. ❜

❛ See, I didn't think this was a popularity contest. I should have equal time to bake them cookies, braid their hair.. ❜

❛ There is something bad down here. Possibly everything bad. ❜

❛ [name] is not dangerous. Something happened to him that wasn't his fault. God, I never knew you were such a bigot. ❜

❛ My diary? You read my diary? That is not okay! A diary is like a person's most private place! ❜

❛ A bad omen and we just ignore it? There's going to be a lot of red faces when the world comes to an end. ❜

❛ Good.'Cause I've had it. [name] is going down. You can attack me, you can send assassins after me, that's fine. But nobody messes with my boyfriend! ❜

❛ This is [name]. He's um.. It's a really long story b-but he's not bad anymore. ❜

❛ I don't want any trouble. I just want to be alone and quiet in a room with a chair and a fireplace and a tea cozy. I don't even know what a tea cozy is, but I want one. ❜

❛ Say it's true. Say I do want to... it wouldn't be you, [name]. It would never be you. You're beneath me. ❜

❛ I don't know what's coming next. But I do know it's gonna be just like this -- hard, painful. But in the end, it's gonna be us. If we all do our parts, believe it, we'll be the ones left standing. ❜

❛ Best of all... I'm not stupid. ❜

❛ Anyone else who wants to run... do it now. Because we just became an army. We just declared war. From now on we won't just face our worst fears, we will seek them out. ❜

❛ Look, I broke a nail, ok? I'm wearing a press-on. ❜

❛ So, what I'm wondering is, does this always happen? Sleep with a guy and he goes all evil? ❜

❛ I'm going to give you all a nice, fun, normal evening, if I have to kill every single person on the face of the earth to do it. ❜

❛ It was exactly you, [name], every detail. Except for your not being a dominatrix. As far as we know. ❜

❛ I see one more display of testosterone-poisoning, and I will personally put you both in the hospital. ❜

❛ I'm beyond tired. I'm beyond scared. I'm standing on the mouth of hell, and it's going to swallow me whole. And it'll choke on me. ❜

❛ I was just thinking about the life of a pumpkin. Grow up in the sun, happily entwined with others, and then someone comes along, cuts you open, and rips your guts out. ❜

❛ Oh! That's my skirt! You're never gonna fit in it with those hips. We have to kill them! ❜

❛ I hate it when they drown me. ❜

❛ Okay, I'm cookie dough. I'm not done baking. I'm not finished becoming whatever the hell it is I'm gonna turn out to be. ❜

❛ I'm looking for this guy. Bleach-blond hair, leather jacket, British accent, kind of... sallow? But in a hot way? ❜

❛ Death is what a slayer breathes, what a slayer dreams about when she sleeps. ❜

❛ A flare gun? If I find [name], I'm staking him, not signalling ships at sea. ❜

❛ It's my first day! I was afraid that I was gonna be behind in all my classes, that I wouldn't make any friends, that I would have last month's hair. I didn't think there'd be vampires on campus! ❜

❛ There's only one thing on this earth more powerful than evil. And that's us. ❜

❛ The fast-growing field of personal grooming has come a long way since you became a vampire. ❜

❛ The whole earth may be sucked into hell, and you want my help 'cause your girlfriend's a big 'ho? Well, let me take this opportunity to not care. ❜

❛ You have fruit punch mouth. ❜

❛ You smell this bad when you were alive? ❜

❛ [name]’s a vampire? She must be dying without a reflection. ❜

❛ What kind of girl travels with a mummified corpse? And doesn't even pack a lipstick? ❜

❛ If I need someone to scream like a woman I'll give you a call. ❜

❛ Well, a man that worships chaos and tries to kill you is a man you can trust. ❜

❛ I accidentally killed [name]! That's okay, right? ❜

❛ That'll be then. When I'm done. ❜

❛ Do you have everything? Books? Lunch? Stakes? ❜

❛ I'm the thing that monsters have nightmares about. And right now, you and me are gonna show 'em why. ❜

❛ I'm the one that dates dead guys. And, no offence, but they were hotties. ❜

❛ I haven't processed everything yet. My brain isn't really functioning on the higher levels. It's pretty much fire bad; tree pretty. ❜

❛ Hey! Remember this? I took it from [name]. Stuck it in her gut. Just slid in her like she was butter. You wanna get it back from me? Dick? ❜

❛ You know. No kick-o, no fight-o. ❜

❛ [name] has minions? ❜

❛ Oh yes! Like how the cow and the chicken come together even though they've never met. It's like Sleepless in Seattle if, if Meg and Tom were, like, minced. ❜

❛ What was the highlight of our relationship -- when you broke up with me, or when I killed you? ❜

❛ You're right. He's manipulative and shallow... and why doesn't he want me? Am I so repulsive? If there was something repulsive about me, you'd tell me, right? ❜

❛ We're not ready? They're not ready. They think we're gonna wait for the end to come, like we always do. I'm done waiting. They want an apocalypse? Oh, we'll give 'em one. ❜

❛ You had sex with [name]? You had sex with [NAME]? ❜

❛ Sorry, [name]. Changed the locks. ❜

❛ Besides, I look cute in a tiara. ❜

❛ Oh, [name]! Of course it's yes! ❜

❛ I'll end up an old lady who can only live with cats. ❜

❛ Okay, I was hoping to not get that cynical till I was at least forty. ❜

❛ I don't have time for bondage fun. ❜

❛ She knows about viscera. Makes you proud. ❜

❛ They were supposed to be my light at the end of the tunnel. I guess they were a train. ❜

❛ It was terrible. I moped over you for months, sitting in my room, listening to that Divinyls song "I Touch Myself".. of course, I had no idea what it was about. ❜

❛ I'm working. Go away. ❜

❛ The one who, according to [name], is the, quote: "smartest, funniest, coolest, hottest, and having the thickest boy eyelashes boy in school," and quote. ❜

❛ I just saw you taste your own nose blood. You know what? I'm too grossed out to hear anything you have to say! ❜

❛ Pop culture reference. Sorry. ❜

❛ How can you tell me you understand what those vampires are feeling? You aren't a passion to them, you are a snack! A willing, idiotic snack. ❜

❛ You want credit for not feeding on bleeding disaster victims? ❜

❛ Let me answer that question with a head-butt. ❜

❛ Right now you're asking yourself, "What makes this different? What makes us anything more than a bunch of girls being picked off one by one? ❜

❛ I-I was... just thinking, wouldn't it be funny some time to see each other when it wasn't a blood thing.. ❜

❛ Will you just hold me? ❜

❛ If it's possible, you seem more monosyllabic than usual. ❜

❛ I'm just worried this whole session's gonna turn into some training montage from an 80's movie. ❜

❛ How do you get to be renowned? I mean, like, do you have to be nowned first? ❜

❛ Not too crazy? Those are your credentials? ❜

❛ I can fool [name], and I can fool my friends, but I can't fool myself. Or [name], for some reason. What I want from you I can never have. ❜

❛ Nooo... I think you're up in the clocktower with a high-powered rifle because you wanna blend in. ❜

❛ You've awakened the prom-queen within. And that crown is going to be mine. ❜

❛ I'm pretty spry for a corpse. ❜

❛ Oh, look at my poor neck... all bare and tender and exposed. All that blood, just pumping away. ❜

❛ This is a beautiful moment we're having. Can we please fight? ❜

❛ And the thing is, I like my evil like I like my men - evil. You know, straight up, black hat, tied to the train tracks, 'soon my electro-ray will destroy Metropolis' bad. ❜

❛ We can't actually do any of those things. You'd lose your soul, and besides, I don't even own a kimono. ❜

❛ Doesn't matter how well prepped you are, or how well armed you are. You're a little girl. ❜

❛ Repeat until insane. ❜

❛ You're in love with pain. Admit it. ❜

❛ What are you doing here? Five words or less. ❜

❛ [name] seems so solid. Like.. he wouldn't cause me heartache. ❜

❛ Okay, a scenario: you back off, I'll back off, but you promise not to go all wiggy until we can go to my Watcher and figure this out. ❜

❛ [name], your mouth is open, sound is coming from it. This is never good. ❜

❛ Can a vampire ever be a good person? Couldn't it happen? ❜

❛ I don't know. I kinda' see [name] as the loyal type. ❜

❛ No, [name], it's not you. You're the one freaky thing in my freaky world that still makes sense to me. ❜

❛ Sarcasm accomplishes nothing, [name]. ❜

❛ You're disgusting. ❜

❛ Well, we'll fix it. We'll hit serious research mode. ❜

❛ Every year, my Dad buys me cotton candy and one of those souvenir programs that has all the pictures. ❜

❛ Now might be a good time for your trademark stoicism. ❜

❛ So I told him that I loved him...and I kissed him.. and I killed him. ❜

❛ I'm getting better, honest. In fact, from here on, you're going to see a drastic distraction reduction. Drastic distraction reduction... try saying that ten times fast. ❜

❛ [name] and I are getting married! ❜

❛ We're going to the magic shop. No school supplies there. ❜

❛ [name] tried to kill me! ❜

❛ So you haven't murdered anybody lately? Let's be best pals! ❜

❛ I may be dead, but I'm still pretty. Which is more than I can say for you. ❜

❛ This is not gonna' be pretty. We're talkin' violence, strong language, adult content. ❜

❛ I have to get away from that 'bad boy' thing. There's no good there. ❜

❛ Exactly. I'm sure [name] is flogging and punishing himself.. This is sounding wrong before I even finish.. ❜

❛ I just don't want you to get your hopes up. ❜

❛ Oh, time has no meaning here. ❜

❛ Does Elvis talk to you? Does he tell you to do things? Do you see spots? ❜

❛ Right. I'm the chosen one. And I choose to be shopping. ❜

❛ Just look at you, [name]. Less than 24 hours ago you killed a man. And now it's all zip-a-dee-doo-dah? ❜

❛ You had to tie me up to beat me. There's a word for people like you, [name]: loser. ❜

❛ Hey! I was intimidating here. ❜

❛ I know you guys think it's just a big, dumb, girlie thing, but it's not. I mean, a lot of those skaters are Olympic medal winners. ❜

❛ Yeah, just see him in a relationship. 'Hi, honey. You're in grave danger. I'll see you next month! ❜

❛ We're not friends. We never were. ❜

❛ Sure. We saved the world, I say we party. ❜

❛ Great. My secret weapon is PMS. That's just terrific. Thanks for telling me. ❜

❛ You have a lot to learn about women.. ❜

❛ Aren't you going to introduce me to your... Holy God, you're [name]! ❜

❛ I got older. ❜

❛ Yeah, I'm also a person. You can't just define me by my Slayerness. That's... something-ism. ❜

❛ My boyfriend had a bicentennial. ❜

❛ Boy, you've really thought this through. How bored were you last year? ❜

❛ This.. is not your business. It's mine. ❜

❛ Hey, the way things were going, be glad that's the worst that happened. At least I got to the two of you before you actually did something. ❜

❛ Come on, you've been dating for what, like 200 years? You don't know what a girl means when she says maybe she'll show. ❜

❛ Well, when you've been around since Columbus, you're bound to pile up a few exes. ❜

❛ D'you have any gum? ❜

❛ You know, I know what that looks like, but I-I swear it's not what it looks like. It's magic weed. It's not mine. ❜

❛ I didn't even break a nail. ❜

❛ God, [name], is that all you think about? ❜

❛ [name] didn't set this up. [name] did. This is the wrapping for the gift. ❜

❛ You're older than him, right? Just between us girls, you are looking a little worn around the eyes. ❜

❛ Mom, I'm a Vampire Slayer. ❜

❛ You know, nothing's really going to change. The important thing is that I kept up my special birthday tradition of gut-wrenching misery and horror. ❜

❛ I think I speak for everyone here when I say, 'Huh?'. ❜

❛ Guys. The environment. I'm telling you, it's totally key. The earth is in terrible shape, we could all die. ❜

❛ Unfortunately, that's all I could get out of my informant before his aggressive tendencies forced me to introduce him to Mr. Pointy. ❜

❛ You know what? I like the look. It's um, it's extreme, but it looks good, you know, it's a leather thing. And, uh, I said extreme already, didn't I? ❜

❛ What about me? I love you so much. And I tried to make you go away. I killed you and it didn't help. And I hate it! ❜

❛ It's a stupid dance with stupid people I see every stupid day! ❜

❛ My Dorothy Hamill phase. My room in LA was pretty much a shrine. Dorothy dolls, Dorothy posters. I even got the Dorothy haircut, thereby securing a place for myself in the Geek Hall of Fame. ❜

❛ Guys, I think reality stepped out of here about five minutes ago. ❜

❛ There are two things that I don't believe in: coincidence and leprechauns. ❜

❛ I thought a professional demon chaser like yourself would've figured it out by now. ❜

❛ You know, if you're not too busy having sex with my MOTHER! ❜

❛ Don't worry. They can't come in unless they're invited. ❜

❛ They were powerful men. This woman is more powerful than all of them combined. ❜

[aion-rsa]

Awesome Moms of Science Fiction and Fantasy

https://www.denofgeek.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/harry-potter-movies.png?resize=400%2C400

Fantasy tends to be a genre of dead mothers and wicked stepmothers. Perhaps this shouldn’t be a surprise since modern stories often draw on generations of fairy tales and retellings with absent moms. Yet when the mothers are part of the story, they frequently function solely in their parental role, without an indication of their own personhood beyond that. So for Mother’s Day, I wanted to create a list of some of science fiction and fantasy’s (SFF) amazing moms. We may not get to see the lives of these moms on screen or on the page, but we’ve got the clues to know that they are their own people—and that makes them realer mothers.

Laurel Lightfoot

I’ve already written about what I loved about Pixar’s Onward as a gamer, but my first response to the film really came as a mother. Laurel Lightfoot, a single mom who has been raising two boys since her husband died 16 years earlier, doesn’t hesitate for a second to charge into danger when she thinks her boys are in trouble. While there’s a classic Mama Bear element that emphasizes her mom-ness, there’s also the fact that she picks up a giant sword and goes head to head with a dragon.

I watched the film thinking “I want to be the kind of mom who does that.” Part of the reason Laurel’s in shape enough to go dragon-slaying is that she does her own workouts in the morning and she’s got a mean ogoshi (hip throw) that she utilizes early on. She obviously still loves the husband she lost, but she’s moved on and is in a long-term relationship. At the end of the movie, she goes out for a girl’s night, wielding a battle ax. As a mom character, she’s got plenty of personhood beyond her role as a mom—and all of that comes together to a high degree of awesome.

Queen Ramonda

Being the mother of the Black Panther can’t be easy. Being the mother of two Black Panthers, as happens to Queen Ramonda in a recent run of comics set in Wakanda (Shuri has taken on the Black Panther mantle twice), has to be even harder.

While there’s never a doubt that Queen Ramonda takes the back seat to her children, she’s clearly got a backbone of steel. In the MCU, when Killmonger (Michael B. Jordan) wins in ritualistic combat against T’Challa (Chadwick Boseman), Angela Bassett’s Queen Ramonda, along with her companions, brave Jabari land to gain allies in taking back Wakanda. In the first issue of Nnedi Okorafor’s excellent run on Shuri, Queen Ramonda brings back The Elephant’s Trunk, a group of women who would secretly guide Wakanda from behind the scenes. Queen Ramonda is always there to support her children, but she’s also always there to support her country, and to make sure that Wakanda stays strong.

Molly Weasley

For the majority of the Harry Potter series, Molly Weasley (Julia Waters in the movies) serves as the good-mom vision of what Harry could have had. She dotes on her children. She supports her husband, even when she thinks he’s made the wrong choices (flying car???). But there’s a moment at the end of the series when Molly Weasley unleashes, and we see that, as well as being a maternal presence, she’s also a witch packing a whole lot of heat in her wand. While there was a debate back when the last book came out that her magic was wasted as a housewife, there’s also an element of choice there: Who says that having powerful magic as a mom isn’t important?

Captain Callisto

While Miles from Tomorrowland may not be a television show on a lot of adult radars, it has the rare distinction of having the mom be the captain of a family run ship. Captain Callisto works for the Tomorrowland Transit Authority, and it’s her job that takes Miles and the rest of the family all over the galaxy. She’s the final word when it comes to decisions for any mission—but she’s also mom, and she’s there to help her children navigate their own place in the universe.

Janet van Dyne

The original Wasp has gone through a number of incarnations in the comics, and not all of them were great moms. Michelle Pfeiffer’s recent MCU incarnation, where it’s the hope of seeing her daughter again that allows her to communicate from the Quantum Realm, that works best for me as a character who is both all-mom and all-person.

First, Janet’s work as an agent for SHIELD led her to make the ultimate sacrifice to save the world—not something mom characters are always allowed to do. When she returns from the Quantum Realm, she’s got even more abilities, something I hope she’ll get to explore with the help of her family. But even while she’s a superhero, she still calls her daughter Jellybean with so much love, you can see it radiate from her—even when she’s doing it from inside the body of Scott Lang.

Sally Jackson

One of the guiding beacons of light through the “Percy Jackson and the Olympians” middle grade series by Rick Riordan is Percy’s mother, who is the one person who loves him unconditionally. Although for the entire first book, Percy’s motivation is that he thinks his mother is dead, it turns out the gods were just playing havoc with mortals, and by the end of the novel, not only does she return to life, but she also reclaims her own personhood from an abusive relationship.

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As the novels progress, Sally only ever appears in the background, but you can tell there’s growth and development for her off stage as she pursues her dream career, and as she becomes romantically involved with a really solid boyfriend. When Percy tries to get them both to safety late in the series, the pair enthusiastically join in the battle to save the world—which shows that parents don’t have to get left at home to do nothing while their hero kids battle against incredible odds.

Joyce Summers

While Joyce Summers (Kristine Sutherland) of Buffy the Vampire Slayer actually does stay at home for the most part, she also stepped up to the plate when needed. She and Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar) had a tumultuous relationship, and she actually doesn’t take it well at all when Buffy’s Slaying comes out, but eventually, she becomes a supportive figure in Buffy’s life, as well as a center of normalcy in the midst of weirdness.

Joyce serves in a supportive mothering role to other characters in the series—including in one heart to heart with Spike (Jason Marsters)—and loves Buffy’s supernatural sister, Dawn, despite having had her memories rewritten in order to accept her. While in many ways Joyce fits into the category of the mom who only ever gets to be a mom, the series frequently hinted at aspects of her life beyond being mother to the Slayer, and her loss was felt deeply by the characters after her (natural) death.

Muneeba Khan

Unlike Joyce Summers when she discovered Buffy’s secret identity, Muneeba Khan, mother of fan favorite Kamala Khan/Ms. Marvel, drops another kind of bomb when Kamala fesses up: she already knew. While Kamala has been running around, hiding her superhero activities for months, Muneeba figured out what was going on and quietly supported Kamala’s activities.

While frequently Muneeba’s role in Ms. Marvel has been as a parental figure to avoid, rebel against, or seek out for solace and comfort, there are few moments or parent-child interactions in comics that have hit me as deeply as that reveal in Ms. Marvel Vol. 3 #18. It’s both the ultimate in realizing that your mom always knows what you’re up to—and an ultimate showing of love.

Martha Kent

Moms aren’t defined solely as the person who gives birth to a child. Some of the greatest moms in SFF are adoptive, or found family. One such mom who consistently reassures with her presence is Martha Kent, who raised the orphaned Kal-El as her own. But she’s not one to just sit back and let the world happen around her. On Smallville, not only did Annette O’Toole’s Martha serve on both the Kansas State Senate and the U.S. Senate, but she also took on the mantle of the Red Queen to protect Clark’s secret identity. That’s a lot for any mom to take on!

Granma Ben

In the excellent Bone comic series by Jeff Smith, Granma Ben emerges as one of the coolest grandmothers around—early on, readers find out she’s the reigning champion of the annual cow race, and that’s long before they realize how much of her life she had to hide in order to keep her granddaughter Thorn safe.

She’s the only mother that Thorn ever knows, and she’s continually heroic in the way she stands up to the evils of the world around them, serving as a role model for Thorn—and Fone Bone—as they navigate the evils Granma Ben accidentally helped set into motion.

Alfred Pennyworth

Sometimes, the role of mother falls beyond the neat boxes celebrated on the card-giving holiday, and I think one such character who consistently serves as a mother to a broken superhero who badly needs one is Alfred Pennyworth.

Both as Bruce Wayne and Batman, the hero relies on Alfred to manage things. Alfred also regularly serves as Bruce’s moral compass, particularly in the Christopher Nolan films where he’s played by Sir Michael Caine. Alfred loves Bruce unconditionally, even when he’s making the wrong decisions, and he’s there to help Bruce be a better person—which is one of the best ways to describe the job of a mom.

Who are your favorite mothers in SFF?

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