#that sleep deprivation be hitting hard ngl

[emotionalsupportgoblin420]

Nothing like randomly crying over some fake angst you made up in your own head 👍

[elf-osamu]

Hello!!! I hope you don't mind me requesting a comfort scenario with GN!reader and Gojo Satoru. The reader is touch starved and tired in general so Gojo soothes them to sleep <333

“I WISH YOU SWEET DREAMS”

[ masterlist ] [ reblogs are v v v appreciated ]

hurt/comfort (kind of), romantic relationship, satoru gojō x gn!reader

warning(s) : touch-starved!reader, trouble sleeping, sleep-deprived!reader, pre-established relationship

word count : 583 words

plot : “life can be stressful and exhausting - sometimes, people crave rest and affection”

a/n : I'M SO SORRY FOR WRITING THIS AFTER ALMOST A YEAR OMG, i've been so busy between mental health struggles and school. but i managed to write it ! this request was adorable to write, truly 😭<3 ngl satoru is one of my comfort characters and i love writing for him !!

tiredness seemed to be lingered over your body, like an invisible coat pressed with force on your shoulders, reluctant at the thought of disappearing too soon. it was a rather troublesome feeling, making everything more complicated than it already was — an unpleasant situation to find yourself in.

there wasn’t a specific reason for your behaviour (or was there? as of now, you were too restless to think about your feelings), it had been just an awful week and you hadn’t been able to sleep properly, if not at all. your whole body demanded a place to lie on, to finally rest peacefully without worries on your mind, but it seemed an unsurpassable task, something which required too much trouble and energy to be actually put into practice.

on top of that, your need for physical contact was becoming more and more persistent as the time passed; you craved the comforting sensation that was human warmth; you missed your boyfriend’s, satoru, presence and affection.

it had been a rough time for the both of you: your free hours didn’t align with his and viceversa, resulting in an unmet wish and a desert apartment. you tried to occupy your mind with everything you could think of when waves of loneliness hit you — you had to distract yourself from that constant feeling, otherwise you would have completely succumbed to despair.

however there you were, laying down on the bed with your face drowned in the comfort of your mattress.

as your thoughts got the best of you, you didn’t have the energy to do anything, but your restless mind kept you from feeling enough at ease to rest, even for a short time.

you were planning on another boring and sorrowful night, already visualizing all kinds of misfortunes that could happen from there to the following day, until you suddenly heard a familiar humming. it was low, but it brought a cheerful sound to your ears; hope was growing in your chest, the possibility that at first seemed unthinkable was now almost reality.

as you sensed his presence, you quietly said, almost in a whisper, “satoru?”.

footsteps echoed in the room, answering to your question.

“the one and only” he made himself known, leaving a kiss on the crown of your head.

after he changed into more comfortable clothes, satoru lay down next to you, hugging you to bring you closer to him. your muscles relaxed under his touch and so you hugged his waist, feeling finally comfortable after days.

“bad day?”, he asked softly, not wanting to upset you, and kissed your forehead.

you rested your head on his chest, “bad everything. i’m… so exhausted and i’ve missed you so much”.

he was able to calm your worries with his presence, which was comforting to you. despite being a powerful sorcerer and having to make incredibly hard decisions on a daily basis, he felt like he could show his vulnerable side to you. it wasn’t always like that, it took time to get to the point you two were now — and you both were fine with it.

he kissed your head again, “i missed you too” he whispered, hugging you more tightly. “do you wanna stay here like this?”

your nod was enough to reply to him.

you slowly closed your eyes, listening to his heartbeat and syncronizing your breath with his — and soon enough you fell asleep.

“goodnight, [name]” satoru murmured; he was glad he could make you feel safe.

[ do not copy, translate etc. | by @ elf-osamu ]

[daz4i]

being sappy and vulnerable under the cut 🧐

i am not the type of person to be proud of myself often (or. at all) but since i'm getting better lately, esp in the department of hating myself a little less, i gotta give myself props for going against my avoidant instincts with that show. like i've been thinking of quitting it for months before it went up and it really hurt my mental state to the point others also told me that i should quit but! but. i persevered and it absolutely paid off bc it felt so good to go through with. and it's been a month and i haven't had a "mm actually i wasn't THAT great :/" moment i always have whenever i do anything bc this really was an objectively big achievement. everything i've been doing since march-ish is tbh. and so i'm allowing myself to feel pride while simultaneously trusting myself not to let it go to my head like it used to do in the past (since. the main reason i haven't been proud of myself or any achievement i had in years is that i wanted to keep myself in check abt precisely this, so i think it's innate in me by now) and it's leaking into other areas of my life now too, like how i end up liking my writing or thinking i have good ideas, enough that i want to pursue more skills to develop myself further (which tbh i always did but was just too scared to try 😳 honestly still am but. a little less). there are still A Lot of issues that ik are holding me back in many parts of life and my mental health but. it's very clear that i'm getting better

*since a lot of my vents reach that topic and ik others related to those sentiments i do wanna say tho. i am still suicidal, like i'm managing through life as long as i avoid thinking abt certain topics, and i can very easily lose it when i'm hungry or sleep deprived or imbalanced with my hormones n such, so. still i think it's important to say that these thoughts are quieter now. if they were loud and booming and always there before, they're more easily cast aside now, a tad quieter, less overtaking and nebulous, and more of a solid thing i can grab and put away, if that makes sense. so. i think this is an important thing to point out too. since ik a lot of my mutuals and followers struggle with this too and i want them to know that like even if it doesn't go away, it CAN become easier to handle

i still don't quite believe in the 1000 hits approach or w/e it's called ("the rock doesn't break on one hit but thanks to the 999 blows that came before it" or however it goes) nor do i relate to these posts that are like "one day you'll wake up and realize you haven't thought of killing yourself in months/you like your life/you're feeling good" etc lmao i still very much think they're annoying and still have "recovery" and "positivity" blacklisted for that reason 🫡 BUT for me it was this moment when i got to do smth i love, always did love, that i deeply care about and worked hard to achieve, and this is what made the switch in my brain for the better in the most significant way i think. idk if this is how it'll work for everyone but either way the most important advice i can offer is: find people to be with that you like. this was probably the most important part of this, for me. bc they made the hard work a little easier and part of me not avoiding shit for once is bc i didn't wanna let them down or make things harder for them, which is probably a part of why i'm feeling good abt this whole thing too (like. pursuing the thing i want and love was the least selfish option)

but yeah. things are still hard, but easier than before. it's hard for me to be proud of myself or give myself credit but i'm doing it. as if i removed some veil from my eyes that used to block any of my progress and achievements, but i can now see them more clearly (tho. getting constant praise for my work and effort from multiple people absolutely helped me get rid of said veil hehe). also not to sound cringe but my main self ship atm also helped ngl 😭😭😭 but i may get into that in another post in the future lol

if you read this far: thank you. also why. i appreciate it tho mwah <3

[ghost-of-you]

I just came across your analyses of all the 5sos albums and can I just say: chefs kiss. amazing. from the way you approach them both musically and lyrically (are you a musician? you have a very good ear) to being able to tell who is singing which part of the harmony (when there’s more than 2 singing at once I have No Idea, and even when there’s just 2 I’m still a little hit and miss). so grateful you exist and did them!!! not only for my enjoyment purposes but also because of my crazy projects I’m about to tell you about just in case you’re interested

anyway, it started with the RAH version of teeth. I’m a classically trained violist, I’ve played in many orchestras, I looked and asked everywhere I could think of just to lay my hands on something like the score so I could maybe pull some musician friends together and play it. No avail. Then, sleep deprived and slightly manic and very unmotivated in the middle of writing my honours thesis I must’ve played that bass riff when messing around on my viola and was like ‘this isn’t even hard let me just open musescore’ and decided Luke’s voice best fit the cello and calum the viola and six hours later it was a whole orchestral piece with the riffs passing around the upper strings like the RAH version and also woodwind and brass instruments somehow and then the bass riff led me straight into thin white lies which quickly morphed into NITSW (and can I just say that bridge is the best thing ever when played by strings) and I was like, this is telling a story. That became the first movement of the concerto.

second movement had to start with the flutes playing the piano intro of lover of mine, then I borrowed ghost of you from youngblood and threw in lonely heart, all the ones in vaguely 3’s as far as timing goes went in, all satisfactorily longing (if mvmt 1 is Relationship Angst) ending on a reprise of ghost of you chorus a semitone up (I’m not even sure anymore tbh, it’s def less cohesive but pretty I think) and I tried to copy its RAH intro as an outro. By then I realised I wanted to make the third movement about self discovery that ended on red desert because the album is just SO SAD and it deserved a happy ending and I wanted to try fit as many songs from the album in as I could (no shame and kill my time didn’t fit thematically unfortunately and easier should’ve been in movement 1 but sonically it just didn’t go, at least not yet I’m open to attempting to incorporate any of those songs) so started with old me. I realised I could overlay it with best years. Weird choice I know but the chords and melody worked well enough (and I still don’t think best years has been brought to justice ngl). Then I overlaid wildflower with high which is surprisingly a combination that I love, and it worked music wise and I thought they offset each other alright?? I’m still not quite sure where I’m going with it yet. but then comes red desert and I did the RAH intro and the whole song with harmonies (does get repetitive and idk what to do with that yet) and it’s like. yay, I gave CALM a happy ending.

I guess what I’m asking is I want to do more of these for more of their albums or combination of them (like they’re genuinely so fascinating from a musical and storytelling lens I can’t get enough) and I’ve got some ideas but I want to hear if you have anything you can just hear coming after each other. like complete mess and red line or smth?? even moodswings and space between a rock and a hard place?? idk. just ideas. throw them all at me. I’ll do it and dedicate it to you

Okay, first, no, not a musician, it's just that my dad was a dj, so i grew up around a lot of sound equipment because he's very particular about sound quality and that totally developed my ear for that type of stuff and my interest for music is that much more intense because of it (i did teach myself how to play the guitar and i do sing, but, like, i don't have any real training) and I really appreciate you coming here to say these, because i have a lot of fun writing those. Also I saw your tags, don't know if you ever figured it out but the milf anthem is mrs all american lol

Second, I'm desperate to hear what you did with calm, from the description alone it feels like something impressive, I'm very interested to see how you overlayed high and wildflower because i can see it, but i can't really imagine how that would actually work sokaosksokas

And third, I actually have quite a few smaller combos i like to push together (i went through a mashup phase when i was learning how to play 5sos songs lol) but i usually go from lyrics and adjust the guitar to fit my voice, i have no idea how that could work for you, but one i always do is vapor -> lie to me -> why wont you love me -> bad omens (it used to be high at the end, but then they dropped bad omens and i liked the way that narratively bad omens closed the loop, you end up trapped in the relationship you know it's not working I like that a lot for this combo), i have a few weirder ones, that are mostly the ones that i never fully managed to make it work but i think they could, like moodswings into bleach, story of another us into close as strangers, i know you saw my post about rearranging 5sos5 to tell a story and for some reason i think you can overlay caramel and bad omens, and red line and you don't go to parties (this one i admitedlly don't really know, but i think the red line riff with the ydgtp riff could be something, just a feeling lol), there's the rhythm section mashup, tomorrow never dies -> babylon -> tears, that I think you can make something with the bass in all of them, for some reason vapor and me myself and i, talk fast -> not in the same way -> blender -> kill my time, this one i think its cool because of the 80s pop of the melodies and the progression of the story with the lyrics, lover of mine -> best years -> older -> ghost of you, again you have the narrative and i think the piano can work all of there to make this tragic love song. And this is everything i can think of right now, but i will probably think of more as soon as i hit post tho soaskookasas

But seriously, this sounds really cool, please let me know how it progresses <3

[fillinforlater]

Monday of Appreciation: Part 42

Hello everyone, Smite here!

Guys, a lack of sleep is dangerous, ngl. Don’t be sleep deprived and drive, or you’ll quickly not do anything anymore. That aside, I sadly wasn’t able to read as many fics as before, which means the number of fics on here today will be rather small. 

BUT that does NOT mean that the quality is low! We have some real gems this week! Please check them out.

Update: I got two stories out, the rest is being dragged along, and I don’t know how I’ll be able to time manage it all. No promises.

1. @firagaarmor​: O Sole Mio ft. Gaeul (fluff)

This one is very cute, and nowadays a big inspiration to write more fluffy stuff. The constant hardcore stuff is feeling redundant (as long as I’m not horny), so I’ll try to change things up more. Thank you for this piece, Gaeul will be thoroughly loved!

2. @nsfwflint​: It’s Raining Cats and Dogs ft. Eunbi

Then again this is great. An amazing dynamic, a toxic relationship, but no one can resist Eunbi. I adore the tittle, as well as the ending. The hard smut in the middle is Flint-Level-Good, which we all know and love. How can this woman have so many smuts about her, but there is still new, interesting stuff???

3. @digipigichopshop​: 520 ft. Shuhua

OKAY WOW! Not going to lie, this one hit me out of nowhere, unexpectedly like a truck. Digi’s writing is just HOW THS FUCK IS THIS SO GOOD??? ARE YOU BASICALLY LEVI???. This rant should already show that I see this as an absolute masterpiece and an all time classic (G)I-DLE story. Fuck, the cheating scene is so good, my L4 can’t compare.

4. @midnightdancingsol​: JJN-001 ft. Heejin!, Kim!Lip (female reader)

“The shot pans around the empty room a few more times before it settles on a broad-shouldered woman with shoulder-length brown locks in an oversized white turtleneck knit who sits demurely—although clearly not her natural stance, judging by her barely-concealed wincing glance—on a brown distressed-leather-upholstered armchair.” This straight out of the story btw. Don’t tell me Sol isn’t on a GOAT level... I adore that writing. Futa is killing me lately.

(I still won’t put the whole damn title here xD)

[mythiccheroacademia]

Single-Parent!Headcanons

Characters: Kirishima Eijirou, Kaminari Denki, and Bakugo Katsuki

A/N: Inspired by y’all. Enjoy <3

Warnings: fluff overload? one tiny curse word

Kirishima Eijirou:

the day his son was born was both the worst and best day of his life

his wife died upon delivery and he almost fainted when he heard the news, bakugo caught him before he could hit the floor

it took him 24 hours before he could gather the courage to go to the nursery and see his baby. he thought he wouldn’t be able to stomach the reminder of losing the love of his life

but when he held the small boy, who instantly nuzzled into his father’s chest, sighing with relief, kirishima was hooked for life

he just continued to hold his son into his chest and cry until he couldn’t anymore

from that day on, he swore he’d be the best parent he could be for his wife and his child’s sake

bc kiri is such a youthful and loving person, taking care of his son was easy, fun, and rewarding

ofc there were hard days, but it was all worth it when his baby would wake up with an adorable laugh, smiling up at him like he was his entire world

they’re two peas in a pod

he and his son are just the cutest pair

he takes his son everywhere, strapping him on his chest with a baby carrier

you bet your ass he’s taken him on (a safe) patrol around the block

kirishima is the kind of dad that puts his kid in a laundry basket, sits them in front of the tv, and acts out rollercoaster sounds

he lives for that loud laugh of his son’s

blows raspberries into the kid’s stomach whenever he starts getting cranky

his son’s first word was “manly” and kirishima spent the entire day bothering the bakusquad about it

everyone has 12 different copies of the video—y’know...just in case

when he takes his first steps, kiri’s swinging him around the house and giving him so many kisses on his chubby cheeks

when he saw his son had one spiky tooth growing in, he almost drowned from the cuteness

the kid gets himself into a lot of trouble tho. he’s always crawling towards the edge of something and putting his hand in things that could totally cut it off. kiri has a heart attack at least once a week

calls him, “son” “bud” and “buddy”

I hc that even though he’s lively around his dad, his son is very shy with new people and in new environments so school is kind of tough for him

but kirishima is always understanding of his troubles and tries his best to let him know that as long as he’s his son, he’ll always be his biggest supporter

if that doesn’t work, they go buy their fav meats and have a random bbq (kirishima just looks like the bbq dad™️ lmao). that always seems to do the trick

when his son enrolls in U.A., he’s there with a banner, his fav meat, and a bunch of tears when he sends him off

his son wears their matching crocs only to cheer up his dad. nothing else

aka he lowkey likes them but you didn’t hear that from me!

kirishima always has the urge to ft his kid, like, every hour. but he won’t bc he knows he’s busy training to be a hero

but he does send him uplifting snapchat videos from time to time

his son still wonders how in the world his dad even knows about snapchat

he makes sure nobody knows about this

when his son calls him about his insecurities, comparing himself to his classmates, kirishima is right there to lift him up. he also dealed with those same issues and tells his son that even on his worst days, he’s strong for just facing the day and he needs to believe in himself before others can believe in him

the next day, the bakusquad is watching the tournament together

kirishima has manly tears in his eyes as his little boy places second place in the sports festival

bakugo is threatening to kill him if he ruins his shirt

Kaminari Denki:

denki becomes a dad from adopting a pair of four year old twins (one boy, one girl) that were left homeless and without parents after a villain attack

he kinda knew the parents from hero work and felt it was an obligation to at least make sure their children were okay

he wasn’t planning on necessarily adopting them. he was young and inexperienced with children. how could someone like him raise a kid when he could barely raise himself?

but after two visits to the orphanage and seeing how miserable they looked, he couldn’t leave the building without signing the papers

the transition was awkward. the twins were not only traumatized, but distrusting and scared. they didn’t really know kaminari and now he was suddenly their adoptive parent

kaminari tried everything from ice cream, to late night movie snacks, to hide n seek to get them to relax but it wouldn’t work

he almost gave up hope, and thought maybe it was a better idea to take them back to the orphanage. but that was before the night he woke up to them crawling into his bed, scared from the thunder storm that rumbled on outside

kaminari froze, scared that he’d frighten them away with any sudden movement, but he soon relaxed and hugged them close to his chest when they snuggled into his sides. he sleeps with a peaceful mind that night

although, he’s awoken to them bawling their eyes out over the nightmares they had. he panics but takes comfort in how they still grip to his shirt, face in his chest, seeking his comfort

therapy becomes a regular thing after that

kaminari finds more focus in his life

and as those helpful sessions go on, kaminari finds the twins beginning to open up more and more

they all sleep together now bc cuddle piles always scare the bad dreams away

the boy starts asking for kaminari to help him pick out his outfits

and the girl starts asking him about his quirk

it’s small things like that that lead up to things like this:

they’re in the midst of playing tickle monster when they scream with laughter, “stop! stop, daddy, you caught us!”

the twins stare at him in confusion (and slight worry) when he scoops them up and cries like he broke his leg or something

they got two huge scoops of ice cream that night so they don’t question it

dad jokes are a must

he wears typical dad outfits like hawaiian shirts, cargo shorts, and flip flops

he calls them his “little rockstars” and yes, it’s still embarrassing

kaminari is a playful dad who doesn’t really take things too seriously

his children are always laughing at his dumb jokes and are never afraid to talk to him about anything that crosses their minds

although, they won’t talk to him about love interests bc he likes to play match maker

the last time his daughter told him about some girl she was crushing on, she found out she left her a personally signed chargebolt poster for the girl in her name

kaminari called it a little boost in spirit

her brother found it funny

she was horrified

kaminari swears up and down he’s the cool dad. his kids think otherwise, but their friends LOVE how much of a jokester he is. and he lets them stay up at sleepovers

plus, he’s literally chargebolt

how could they not love him?

denki has a little trouble being serious when he needs to be, but he has good kids so it’s not that much of a problem

there was that one time his son tried to help him during a villain attack. even though kaminari ordered him to get to safety, he didn’t and ended up getting hurt

the twins had never seen their father so angry. it was kind of scary. however, in the next moment, he gathered them up in a big hug and made them swear not to scare him like that again

overall, kaminari is the sweet, fun loving, dad that everyone wishes they had

Bakugo Katsuki:

katsuki became a father the day he found a baby and a note at his doorstep

the note read: “surprise! you’re a dad. i gave you all the legal rights, but you can place her up for adoption if you want.”

least to say, bakugo was pissed

he was even more pissed at himself for getting someone so cold and unloving pregnant

however, he decides to put the baby up for adoption. he cant take care of a baby! he’s at the height of his career. he can basically taste the number one hero spot on his tongue

he’s dead set w the decision, but as he stands outside of the orphanage, he freezes. he just can’t move

bakugo looks down at his daughter as she opens her eyes for the first time. he sees an identical pair of red eyes that make his chest tight with a feeling he hasn’t experienced in a long time

he turns back around and heads back home. it’s easily the best decision he’s ever made in his life

ngl though, growing into the dad role for bakugo was tough

before the girl, he only ever had to think of himself. he was still used to doing everything on his own time and for his own benefit. so being forced to put 100% of his attention to a small helpless human being was not easy

katsuki admits that the first couple of years weren’t his proudest. he was still short tempered, angry with the world, and frustrated bc he felt like his life was ruined

one time, the frustration and sleep deprivation would hit him all at once and he’d just start going off at the baby to just “shut the hell up!” before breaking down and crying with her

it was a dark moment for him, and yet, even after that, his little girl still curled up in his arms to rest when the tears tired her out

it had been a while since he felt unconditional love like that, and so he decided to change for the baby’s sake

you cant tell me that little girl isn’t spoiled rotten

bakugo is a hardass, but he’s all bark no bite. no matter what, he just can’t resist his little girl’s puppy dog eyes

he’s a girl dad to the t

yes he played the princess that needed saving from the big bad dragon. what about it?

his daughter is a firecracker. she started sassing him as soon as she could gargle

he pretends he hates it but his daughter is lowkey funny asl

they go at it when they fight. bakugo’s learned to be a little more patient, but he still has a bit of a temper and it doesn’t mix well when his mini-me has the same explosive anger

is the kind of dad that says sorry by asking her what she wants for dinner

they totally talk mess about other heroes together. he ignores the fact that she admires deku as long as she keeps it to herself

emotional talks are...awkward, but he forces himself through it

she finds it embarrassing (yet oddly endearing) that he got kicked out of a PTA club meeting for threatening to light up some mom for saying the art program didn’t matter

his daughter absolutely won’t talk to him about potential love interests unless she wants them coming up missing

bakugo won’t admit to watching baby videos of his daughter when he sends her off to U.A. and no, he didn’t cry, he got dust in his eye

doesn’t bother her too much, but jumps for his phone when he hears her ringtone

kirishima says he getting soft, but that’s just his little princess

[mainveyn]

yo here's a challenge for ya 😏 write smth for tsukishima about that song u posted on ur story because he is quite similar to ur rinnie but we're tired of you keep talking about him already 🥱 time for our blonde cocky first year to shine 😍 -your bestie irl

a/n : honestly i have no idea which one of you is sending this lol but how dare you stomped into my domain expansion with these kind of bratty attitude 🤨 so no i'm adding my suna into this too 😉💗

genre : angst fluff

characters : suna, tsukishima (not specified so it works for both)

extra notes : this is pretty much self indulgent ig and i was kinda tired while writing this so i dont rlly like how it turns out 🙃 but ngl this song literally screams tsukki, i mean will u look at the name 👀

your eyes were glued on the screen since the movie started, but he knew your mind was somewhere else. it wasn't that hard to notice you're not your usual self. your sleep-deprived look and stiff posture, like you'd been on edge but for no reason. your favourite drink that he made for you is left untouched on the coffee table. and damn, that little space settled between the two of you on the couch. 

all these signs suddenly remind him of the fight he'd with you last week. nothing too serious, it always revolved around the topic of 'you'd been so distant lately' and 'you're not making time for us'. and those words always came out as a whining banter with that cute little pout you excessively used against him.

so what is this faint yet unnerving feeling churning at the pit of his stomach? was it because the argument doesn’t get you as worked up as before anymore? or was it the way your complaint about his neglectful behaviour started to come out as tired already? do you not bother anymore?

he puffed out a sigh, hoping to relieve this sudden heavy weight crushing his heart. internally cursing because he can’t focus on the movie anymore, his brain can’t multitask when he tries to think of ways to make up for you. 

a date at your favourite cafe? or that stupid matching keychain that you keep pestering him about few days ago? shit, what was the name of your favourite kpop group again that you were itching to get their upcoming album? should he get you the polaroid of your bias? is he even okay with the idea of you having someone else's photo at the back of your phone case when you already have him? 

a deep soothing tune from the strumming of the guitar starts to play out softly and pull him back from his haywire thoughts. and he was glad it helped you loosened up too, watching you relaxing on the back of the couch now. so he took the opportunity to scoot closer and slings his arm around your shoulder, pulling you in briefly to place a kiss on your temple. 

when you’re not in front of me

i know insecurities 

get in your head

he wasn’t paying much attention to the first half of the song. but now he can’t help himself from getting hooked into it when the lyrics resonate across your shared apartment, wondering if god is watching him right now because he can taste the irony from each verse.

i’m not gonna interrupt

if you need to talk about it

roll my eyes or get offended by

the way you doubt it 

you curiously peeked at the corner of your eyes, witnessing him nodding along the beats with unusual enthusiasm. your eyebrows lifted in a questioning fashion, because five years of dating him had you know his music taste better than your calculus module. and it's definitely nowhere close to these hopeless romantic genres that you hogged in your playlist.

you know you’re mine

you just forget sometimes 

so promise me you won’t

your mind lets the words sink in, interpreting the chorus to know what really drew his attention but it only hit you hard in the face. the embarrassment slowly takes over, either the fact that he knows you're still not over with those resolved arguments or how he effortlessly gets his message across to reassure you through this very song.

and you know i’ll remind you

when you think i don’t

a smirk was evident on him as he caught you with blushes painted all over your feature. he shifted in his seat so he is facing you now as he wordlessly waited for you to speak up first. but your stubbornness won’t allow you, determined not to give away that your sour mood was long gone. 

“hey stupid, i love you.” he playfully sing along in a teasing tone, but the fondness in his eyes says otherwise.

reblogs are very much appreciated <3

[zepdeans]

there’s not a lot I can say about s3 that hasn’t already been said (and articulated 200x better) but! here are some of my (albeit dumb) thoughts :~)

ep1 -isak leaning against the bathroom wall gets me EVERY time its such a powerful scene esp introducing you to s3 and tarjei..... spare some talent for the rest of us please -LiTeN gUtTeN fRa StRaNgEr tHiNgS -isak rly ties his pants w a shoelace...... -isak noticing even for the first time bc of his laugh.. whew.... also. i love this intro SOOO much bc its so non-monumental? theres no dramatic music or whatever but its not subtle.... like you know right away o shit love interest!! hello sir!! bc isak’s expression watching him :’) i could go on -isak is a bad liar HOWEVER this only applies to stupid nontrivial things e.g. the black sweatshirt. but when you look at him lying about like, his sexuality, he hides that shit well -”c00l” isak. i hate u so much -honestly all u have to do is look at even for .2 seconds and u can tell this boy has had a crush for a solid month bc he just looks awestruck (HOWEVER henrik’s acting is *chef’s kiss* bc its subtle enough to go undetected b4 you actually know eVEN SAW HIM ON THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL) -even isak and emma all sitting on the bench together is funny enough on its on but then a song called threeway comes on and like. julie sdshjsfdjfkjskd ep2 -there’s something so endearing about even’s handwriting idek what -i LOVE even’s video w mikael it reveals so much about him to us- how weird (ok we saw how weird he was w the paper towel thing but) and dorky he is? and his love of film! his view on love stories and how he sees the world :( but it also shows a lot abt isak because he saw even making stupid jokes about vladimir putin and was like yeah we about to fall in LOVE love -isak not using headphones to watch even’s video or r+j?? bde or general incompetence what’s the verdict guys -the isak watching r+j scene hits so hard like yall ever think about isak lying in bed at 3am staring at the ceiling probably thinking about how he’s never gonna get a beautiful world-shattering romance like that like ..... also him changing positions skam get out of my life go away ur too realistic -not to make this even more self-projection-y but isak simultaneously being the least emotionally vulnerable person ever but crying during r+j > -i made a post abt this already but even’s INTENSE staring vs isak’s “i have never looked anyone in the eye in my life” gets me it says so much about their characters -even said i see your bde move (asking me to buy you beer) and i raise u with my own (inviting you to my house after faking not having my id) -”if you listen to music” even is such a dick fsdjhsdff -when the message comes on...... i rlly do owe julie my life huh -”have you heard about my rapping?” “I have actually” have we talked about this enough????? 1. isak finally feels comfortable enough w even to flirt and his first move is to RAP for him jesus christ. keep in mind this is the same man who pulled that smooth af ibuprofen line w emma like...... 2. even has heard about isak’s rapping. either this means im-not-on-social-media even went out of his way to go thru homeboy’s instagram OR isak’s rapping is actually talked about. i- -the group chat messages. cant believe i forgot about the 2016 clown epidemic

ep3  -mahdi is a good friend and i love him. thank u -even wearing isak’s cap until he chucks it at him sjksfjsdjsd -how much yall wanna bet isak’s been listening to illmatic on repeat since last friday thinking abt even (even tho meeting sonja shattered his heart a lil) [also kinda an aside but i think a lot about how isak n even bonded over rap and how some homophobic lyrics in 90s etc rap might have impacted them? or how that little detail ties into julie’s story? e.g. halftime by nas, which is on illmatic] -whats worse. even staring into isaks soul wearing a size xs see-through white t shirt or isak staring at even for five (5) seconds before chugging his beer and immediately making out w emma. OR even crashing that party before it can start “i think you guys are bonding too much” cheesy ass shjhfsdhskdf -yall act like evak didnt invent hands. did even shaking isak’s shoulder telling him his apartment is nice mean nothing to u -im convinced robyn wrote call your girlfriend for this scene specifically bc how could anything fit so perfectly by coincidence -is anything better than egging isak on- even bech naesheim (2016) -idk if yall have read the scripts but i love the sock thing so much bc its soo true to how isak thinks and it makes everything so much more interesting and !!!

ep4  -i will never get over even sending isak bad seinfeld memes -even smacking open isak’s locker. first of all whew second of all u think as soon as he got into the stairwell he lowkey cried bc ow -parallel of isak saying “it’s 2016, why are you religious?” to sana vs. emma’s “it’s 2016, get out of the closet” to isak anyone :( -”takk sanasol!!!!” thank u isak for my life -I wanted to be with you aloneeeee -even’s face when he sees the pool like we get it youre a director -how many times do i need to say even is such a dick sjkfsd “does it look like i care about my hair?” “usually but not right now” like this would only work on isak i love soulmates!! -even just.. fully choking isak out ssdhgfd got em -when the first notes of im kissing you start ooh boy -even going in for the kill kiss and isak going from huh to oooo shit and pushing his lips out at the last minute. phenomenal 

ep5 -ngl as soon as im not in love comes on my heart goes uwu bc like!!!! that song the meaNING.... them......... i jus love this scene sm like theyre in their own little bubble and they both feel so comfortable and at peace :((  -even leaving isak comics about an inside joke of theirs like yall mind if i scream -isak feeling left out from the conversation and his friends whew i felt that... and having them talk about how gross it is to makeout with a girl w facial hair?? blease :( -taking stock of isak’s nicknames: issy k, isabell, izzy, baby jesus, -im not even gonna bother trying to articulate thoughts on Pause bc it’s a literal masterpiece. thank u tarjei henrik and julie for inventing television with this one  -MAGNUS SDFKJSDFJKDSHK "oooh my name is Jonas and I love idealism and reading klassekampen and I don’t like plastic and I skate on a skateboard made of sustainable wood and wear old clothes because new clothes are bad for the environment and I only drink recycled water” screAMMM -what i said abt pause also applies to pride ugh its such a powerful scene and!! the beginning of kicks to isaks stomach. honestly what i fucking love about this episode is how it goes from hell yea best day w even ever to crying in the street within one week (s3 had the best balance of angst and payoff thanks) -even’s Soft Party Flannel... forever tainted by this scene rip -not knowing why even kissed sonja keeps me up at night -speaking of. how used and stupid isak must’ve felt when he saw even completely unbothered, hooking up w his ex at this party?? whew :( -bros is one of my all time favourite clips solely bc of the music?? lift me up gives me chills and when hold my liquor starts i LOSE it -ep5 and 6 remind me of that quote “to see what your characters are really made of you have to break them” because julie rlly goes all in and god it hurts so good

ep6 -never have i ever seen insomnia portrayed as accurately as tarjei did here and i remember when i first watched the cantina scene i was like. winded bc its SO true to sleep deprivation whew -i really like that isak wasnt together with even when he reached out for help and came out to jonas. bc it was him, on his own, being strong enough to talk to his friends and then eventually he was confident and secure enough in himself to be in a good place when even started reaching back out!! -i have no idea what its like to come out to someone, to be afraid of your friends rejecting you, everything isak went through. but tarjei’s acting of when, like, you have something you KNOW you have to tell someone, and youve put yourself in the position where youre going to have to tell them, but youre terrified and eventually just force yourself SAY the words??  -and isak’s smile when he realizes jonas is gonna be his bro no matter what :’)))

ep7 -weirdly one of my favourite isak looks (black t-shirt grey snapback c-c-c-combo) -”what’s your name again?” have i mentioned i love sana and isak bc i love sana and isak -jonas truly is the best friend oh man. perceptive, thoughtful, loving, laidback, a friggen BRO. tbh i was wary of him in s1 and thought he didn’t treat eva well (tho I recognized he loved her a lot, he was just bad at being a boyfriend) but jonas in s3?? just goes to show how powerful your perspective of someone can change viewing them in a different role!! because while jonas was a crappy bf, he literally is SUCH an incredible friend and his actions and words and just! him! in s3 completely redeemed any illwill I had towards him :’) -maybe im a little gay (up there with other s3 comedy classics such as “thats a boys name”) -mahdi season WHEN ugh a legend -’when someone asks isak if hes going to a family party’ literally what other reason for living do i have if not to read the boy squad text convos -isaks locker finally opening and his smile at evens drawing whewwwwwww!! also even rlly is that guy who wont text you back but will leave hand written love letters in ur locker -also. another stellar look from valtersen -slutt a meld meg is a whole masterpiece like what other piece of media has the RANGE -eskild: play hard to get. jonas: no smiley!!! isak: nah fam im good B)

ep8 -this episode is BEAUTIFUL bc you feel practically euphoric?? like hell yeah theyre finally together!! isak is out and accepted and even is done with sonja! but theres also this unsettling undercurrent of worry bc you know deep down something isnt right? why is sonja calling isak? why is even acting kinda strange? whats going on? yknow?? -literally never going to get over 5 fine frokner :~) even is such a goddamn nerd and he’s the man of isak’s dreams can u believe!!  -sana’s little speech is SO important in so many ways ooo i love her so much -also have we discussed eskild making evak do a photoshoot for him. highkey those are my favourite pictures of ALL time u can tell even was like hm strange but im down while isak was more omg guys stop🙄 omg haha eskild i cant believe youre making me cuddle with even for a photo🙄 i cant believe ur making me snuggle this dude for a pic!!!! definitely would not have done this otherwise!!! -magnus only realizing it’s THAT even after seeing how isak looks at him. whew -isak is so brave i rlly love that kid! his text to his mamma <3 -no r*make will EVER nail text conversations like mari/julie did w evak’s this week thanks for coming to my ted talk. i'd quote the best ones but it would literally double the length of this post (ok ill cave. “hahaha shut up❤️” GETS me) -you dont know whats in store but you know what youre here for. hallo -isak running around oslo with even’s clothes looking for him :( his heart is so big he cares about even so so much -when Part II (on the run) comes on in the credits its like a kick in the teeth honestly

ep9 -ive already screamed enough about cherry wine but god it fucks me up -cannot put into words how much I love eskild and how good of a person he is, he just has so much love in his heart  -”wait they have waffles here? see ya” -this convo is why i love skam so much!!!! magnus giving insight and good thoughtful advice to isak was such a brilliant move by julie (also truLy heartwarming) bc like. magnus is a flawed layered character! he’s dumb and ignorant and not very careful with his words BUT hes also such a sweet guy. i genuinely dont think he would hurt a fly and him talking about vilde (in ep10) is ;-; bc he really likes her and respects her and wants to be a gentleman! hes so loving and just. yeah. also i wonder if isak and magnus (and vilde) ever talked about having mentally ill parents and lent on each other for support bc like....<3 [sidenote- this is why i HATE b***** like they absolutely massacred magnus’s character and magnus did not deserve that!] -det er bare slutt........ very cool of tarjei to invent acting here. also the character development makes me WEEP like at first isak lied and told his pappa it was over bc its easier to brush stuff off and say you were joking than be vulnerable especially about 1. having a boyfriend and 2. saying youve already broken up?? but then isak was like hey im done with lying about who i am bc i want my life to be REAL and he told his dad the truth even if it was hard and even if he was trying rlly hard not to cry  -isak reaching out to even<3 standing up for even<3 -o helga natt. another scene i genuinely cannot comment on bc u cant really put into any written language how magical and breathtaking and heartbreaking and powerful and brilliant this scene is. so. -jk. obvs i cant say anything intelligent enough to give this scene justice but probably the most stunning piece of television i have ever had the privilege of watching. even’s text breaks my heart every gd time (esp since we never really see this side of him before finding out he’s bipolar? his guilt, insecurity, feeling like a burden, being scared of losing everyone in his life because he thinks he’ll hurt them). the music is SO beautiful i cry real tears as soon as the strings start. also the brilliance of JUST o helga natt playing and no dialogue except for isaks one line? isak’s realization when he sees the cross. him RUNNING across oslo to go to even. the FLASHBACKS all going backwards in chronological order until them smoking on the bench. isak looking at the bench and not seeing even and u can feel his heart breaking and urs breaks too! but then he remembers the bathroom and he turns and theres even and whewwww. du er ikke alene<3

ep10 -minutt for minutt is THE most healing clip im telling u. and like.. seeing even depressed really is hard and as someone who was very very depressed for 4-ish yrs of their life it rlly hits me? like when youre in an especially bad funk and you cant get out of bed and youre just numb and exhausted and feel so shitty and u want to be alone but you really dont???? could go on but literally i owe henrik holm my life for his portrayal of even  -not to be a soft bitch on main but when isak tucks the blanket over even and it keeps getting pulled off his back so isak just. covers that spot with himself? -i do love that call between sonja and isak bc once again! a flawed (realistic) human being -and isak thinking its his fault even is depressed? it means a lot that sonja told him its no ones fault, even is just bipolar. and i wonder if isak felt that way about his mamma as well, guilty for her being ill, and if what sonja said made him feel better about that situation too :( -lowkey random but when isak is rambling really fast and he goes “maybe we’ll get bombed tomorrow and talking about all this is a waste of time” it continually punches me in the throat bc that is /exactly/ how i ramble and think like tarjei........ pls -like eskild said. there really is so much love in isak’s little grumpy teenage body<3 -isak no longer just passively accepting life as its given to him, now he fights for him and even!!!!!  -isak is such a forgiving person and seeing him able to just accept things and move on? incredible -i remember when i first watched ep1 i was like oooo even and isak are gonna be kosegruppa partners and thats when theyll first get together, cooking food or smth!! but lmfao after episode 3? kosegruppa whomst???? also hilarious vilde thought isak of all people would willingly sign up for kosegruppa just to go to revue parties -even and linn friendship!!!! -cannot articulate how mf heartwarming it is to see even smiling and being more himself after being depressed (also thank u julie for having ups and downs coming out of his depression- its so true to life having one day when youre feeling awesome and then the next you feel awful again for no reason and its SO frustrating) -I had to stop watching passe pa meg cause it made me toooooo crazy! it would just be like: “I like seeing you laugh” and I was like: *SCREAMS* -im the fucking master of lying 😤 -literally don’t know why isak and even ragging on kosegruppa is so funny but “did you think I joined to have fun” gets me every time -I SAW YOU THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL -also even literally radiating love @ isak watching get snarky w vilde on the phone bc it reminded him of the first time he saw him! even rly is that boyfriend who thinks isak being pissy is the Best Thing he has Ever seen -halla boiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiz -literally the glo up of isak telling his friends the order in which he’d bang them -No filter! wow I love symbolism -so nice to see the girls together for a lil bit :) -the boys hyping up mags while also telling him to be respectful awwwwww -take desperate to a whole new level- Confucius  -who’s going to show isak how to properly hold a beer can -literally evak banter gets me thru the day. thank u tarjei and henrik for having phenomenal chemistry + improvisation skills + making isak and even the dumbest nerdiest boys i have ever seen -biology partner. and friend. ;-; -even literally is the biggest stoner blease -isak’s talk with eva is just sooooo<3 and not to be emo on main but every single word of the last few sentences he says hit me so gd hard because i feel the exact same way in my BONES -livet er nå 💛

final thoughts :( <3 -this season is so special. it feels like one really long oscar-worthy movie or smth?? i cant even exblain, its just magical. ALSO very dear to my heart. -julie really said you guys have seen isak sad and alone and repressed for the past two seasons so heres him falling in love with the best person in the world and coming to terms with who he is and being brave and opening up and finally being happy and living a real life -this season definitely feels different from s1/2/4 to me editing or production or music smth wise? as in, its got a lot fewer aesthetic shots and the cinematography seems a bit different if that makes any sense???? I also think this is the season most focused just on the main (i.e. not many- if any? sideplots going on) -literally will never get over the thought, love, and detail put into this season. when i say there is literally nothing i would change about it, i mean it and coming from my nitpicky ass??? means a lot lmfao. the acting, directing, music choices, symbolism...... sublime -s3′s cold rainy autumn aesthetic makes me ACHE for fall and also nostalgic for a highschool experience I never had lmao?? also. all the nighttime clips >>> -don’t know what else to say except thank u skam for my life

[illicitlullabyy]

i took some notes whilst listening to the album for the first time

(reminder that this was early in the morning and i was sleep deprived)

1 - I Forgot That You Existed 

yes! boppy! 

omg the laugh is so cute! 

i love the chorus so much this makes me feel so good and the lyrics are so cute i asjhshgjf

“it isn’t love it isn't hate its just indifference”

the beat reminds me of ‘trouble’ by iggy azalea 

the notes and that one run go off

2 - Cruel Summer

jhgkdjvghgu. what. I’m confused. yes! i feel like im dreaming ajkgfjgyjgs

oh the bridge omg yes sjkabgasg

hE LOOKS UP GHRINNING LIKE A DEVIL djjdhjgd YES BITCH POP OFF

i love it it slaps omg 

I LOVE YOU ISNT THAT THE WORST THING YOUVE EVER HEARD 

3 - Lover 

so cute 

awwwww 

the bridge aksjghsghjsdfdghs

did they get married omg 

anyway i love this but it makes me sad cuz I'm lonely 

4 - The Man

ok go off the fast talking rapping yes

yes the beat

yES

YES

the references in this album are sick omg 

BITCHES

ID BE A BITCH NOT A BALLER this might be my fave so far???

5 - The Archer

its slow, very different from everything we've had the past couple years

there's a buildup but no real drop

awwwww

the spite my face line really hits oof 

6 - I Think He Knows 

ok this beat.. work 

oh the moan

7 - Miss Americana & The Heartbreak Prince 

ok lit

a title repetitive but i like i t. 

very cute. 

call it what u want vibes. 

8 - Paper Rings

omg yes

jhrjhvhsfdjhsd

loveeee

yes yes yes 

the lyrics are amazing 

omgggggg

so cute like the perfect love song

folky country isn i love it 

dirty dreams i- 

9 - Cornelia Street

cfhdrdhtsjhdh

cute!!!

id never walk cornelia street again- im crying 

so cute omg i love it inwjhsj

awwwwww

the bridge. this sounds so honest. 

damn hit those notes tay. 

nooo the next track is gonna be sad

10 - Death By A Thousand Cuts 

wait. 

oh 

what

ok slaps

oh no sad

awwww

wow this is like,,, stripped down i loveee

not my fave 

these lyrics thoooo

yes the fast singing. 

awww i

“ill be alright” damn 

 11 - London Boy

awww joe

omg so cute 

these rhymes omg

THE ACCENT AJGGUYDGIUUGUG

hes best METES lmaooo

loveeee this one 

12 - Soon You'll Get Better

oh ok

cute 

omg 

country.  its so simple i loveeee

this is about her mom right im so sadim crying djhfjdf 

13 - False God 

ok werk 

hm 

i don’t really understand this but werk

14 - You need to calm down 

oh 

OH 

yes this beat slaps

that ‘damn’ tho,,,, yessss

she said gay jvjkdkgkdsgjhjkgsd

omg pride anthem 

HIS gown 

yes female empowerment 

the fast talking i love 

15 - Afterglow 

ok cool

yeah 

good cute sweet sad nice 

hmmm...

16 - ME! 

kidz bop anyone 

i mean... ok kinda slaps 

really fun 

not a huge fan of the selling is fun part but eh 

17 - Its Nice To Have A Friend

its really simple

its got like, Japanese? idh music vibes idk its the plonking in the back

really cute 

one of my favourites 

the harmonies in the back give me chills they're stunning

18 - Daylight

CIWYW/Gorgeous vibes 

the harmonies on ‘daylight’ 

yes its so good

it doesn't hit me that hard bc we knew the lyrics but damn the lyrics 

wait i lied it just gets better

its really long but ok

im kinda bored ngl

you gotta step into the daylight and let it go omg im so emotional im crying 

[jungtookthejams-blog]

Stray Kids in College/High School

[@softbuntaes requested:

“Stray kids and bts college at drabble”

YES]

stray kids | bts

Chris;

always sleep deprived

he’s really friendly tho

but for the most part he keeps to himself & his friend group

everyone goes to him for english tips

but they have no idea you’re fluent too kekekek

you find him really cute

like you don't like him but you find him pleasing to look at

bc you don't know him that well

but his friends catch you glancing at him a lot & tell him

he looks at you while you're taking to someone and he's like oH

he finds you so so gorgeous

so when you glance at him again he's LOOKING AT YOU

you both blush & look away from each other

so your friends end up setting y'all up

"soomin said she wanted help w english??"

"really? that's what i came here for, too. to help her.. with english."

you're blushing lol

"you know english too? are you fluent?"

"uh, yeah. aha.. i lived in (country) for a few years.."

and that lead to a beautiful friendship

lots of english speaking to tease everyone else lmao

he confessed at a coffee shop via the barista & a note 

cutiE

Woojin;

he tol

teddy bear!!1!

well-respected for his grades & personality

so when he saw some jock shove you into a locker

he was not having it

he shooed the asshole away & helped you

he was so concerned honestly

after seeing you’re all right he’d smile & tell you that you can come to him anytime you need protection

you’re all uwu

you smile at each other in the hall a lot from that day on

you ended up going to him abt being friendzoned by someone

through his comfort you realized that you really really liked him

so your friendship grew & blossomed from there

until he asked you out one night on a hill under the stars

what a man istg

Minho;

talking to you was a dare tbh

like his friends saw you, thought you were hot, and went like “MINHOOOOO GOGOGO”

so minho, the school’s king, did it

he hasn’t dated much but girls are falling at his feet

his good looks, up-kept grades, and talents make him everyone’s ideal type

but he’s not a playboy

he wants someone he can keep to cherish & love

so he talked to you

and you were like lmao no

bc you kinda judged him based on his status ngl

but he’s stubborn sooooo

“i’ll make you fall in love w me!”

he tried

he always hung out w you, was touchy & affectionate w you..

lmao you couldn’t resist his charm

but you never let it show

you stayed rock solid on the outside

on the inside you were all fikshrfksi

after a few months he got frustrated and confessed that while “failing” to get you to love him he’d fallen head over heels for you

you almost cried bc he honestly seemed so heardbroken

y’all got together & had your first official date the next day :’)

Changbin;

“i like dark”

soft emo bby™

keeps to himself & his friend group

doesn’t say much to anyone else tbh

but if you talk to him he’s chill

you’re quiet as well

not unpopular tho

quite the opposite actually

everyone knows you as the cute shy bean

& a lot of people can see that you have a crush on binnie

but ofc he can’t

he eyes you a lot as well bc you’re too adorable

his friends obviously see all of this

so one of them befriends you over a couple weeks and convinces you to tutor changbin in english

you can bet your ass that friend was chris

he just wanted a break

so you had a hard uwu and agreed bc that poor bab

so you met up w changbin and y’all were all blushy the whole time

he let you hold gyu

you were like :o

you loved gyu

n’ he was all

fsuijkfjsbfs

y’all got together a couple weeks later when he randomly kissed you bc you were being too fkn cute

you’re not complaining tho

Hyunjin;

pretty boi!!

he’s kinda reserved but loved nonetheless

helpful

always has anything anyone needs in his bag

like he’ll straight up pull out a curling iron or smthn

y’all met in the library 

you were too short to get the book you wanted lmao

so he grabbed it for you

it was short & sweet, a simple occurance

but he found you so so pretty

so when he found you crying in a closet the next day

he was like bitch who the F-

he comforted you despite not really knowing you

you got in a fight w your best friend & they said some really nasty things that really hit home

after that you found yourself clinging to him a lot

he didn’t mind at all

he introduced you to his friends & they became your new friend group

they all ship y’all hardcore

felix set y’all up lmao

“felix said he was going to give me my chemistry notes back??”

��eh..”

ofc y’all ended up confessing & sharing a sweet lil kiss

Felix;

the school’s closeted class clown

like he thinks of some amazing things to do/say that would be really funny

but he doesn’t have the balls to do it bc he’d probably get in trouble

dabs

so cute tho

he’s pretty popular

party boi

you find him cute

cutecutecute

so you actually started leaving cute little anonymous notes in his locker

not love letters but like

selfcare notes

“don’t forget to get lots of sleep!”

“know that you’re loved no matter what”

god he was so SO soft for whoever this person was

bc holy shit i can’t even

he became obsessed w finding out who it is

seungmin was like !!! that’s (Y/N)’s handwriting!!

so felix shyly confronted you one day and you owned up to it

you were so so shy and kinda scared

until he basked you in affection

“you’re mine. please be mine.”

uwuwuwuwuwuwu 

Jisung;

sunshine boi

will happily talk to anyone

has girls falling at his feet

but is so oblivious to it lmao

he sees you one day and he’s like :o

bc you’re at a lunch table w no food

that & you’re stunning

so he happily sits next to you & strikes up a convo while subtly giving you food

 you find his upbeat personality endearing

so you shyly give him your number

he’s over the moon abt this

so y’all call & text on the daily

you’ll facetime him at like 2am crying and he picks up

you panic but he’s already on the defensive

“who hurt my little sunshine??”

your family was being harsh on you

so he told you to move in w him once y’all are out of school

you’re like

sadfikusahfujnbks

throws rocks at your window in the middle of the night

confessed by climbing in your window

lol

you love him tho

Seungmin;

he’s pretty reserved

he’s chill if you talk to him but he’s kinda shy

has good grades

awkward bean

y’all met when you were at chris’ house

he was helping you w some of your studies

& seungmin just walked in lmao

he got all shy & apologized but y’all were like no no

so chris introduced you two

all was well

but from that point on seungmin couldn’t help but notice you more in school

like damn you’re so gorgeous & cute

so he works up the nerve to talk to you

you’re like :D

and he’s all uwu

so y’all have lots of study dates

he asks you out by leaving a note in your textbook what a cutie-

suddenly y’all are the power couple lmao

Jeongin; 

he’s just a lil cutie

like

that’s it

he’s the school cutie ok

kinda reserved? he keeps to himself most of the time but is totally cool w someone else talking to him

loves new friends

so when you talked to him bc of a dare he was all uwuwu

bc you’re a lil cutie like him

tbh your classmates shipped y’all

so you two became good friends lmao

his friends adore you

they always tease him saying that y’all would be perfect together

and he gets all blushy

after a growing friendship he asks you to a school dance

that’s where y’all share your first kiss :)))

sings for you at said dance

you just,, fall for him

UWUWUWUWU

[the-suriel-deserved-better]

Thoughts while reading Acowar.

Mind the swearing and spoilers kids. -2 years before the wall? Wait is this like a baby bat Rhys POV? -oh God this field isn't a nice place. Kinda like it tho. - omfg 6 High Fae... 6, to defeat one Illyrian... damn. - Rhys is so protective if his brothers it's killing me. -AGH PART ONE HERE I FUCKING COME. -Yes Feyre, burn this shit. -Already thinking about that wingspan Feyre? Can't blame ya. - Ugh Tamlin no can you not enter this moment just yet. Ugh Lucian I'm fucking watching you. -Oh for Fuck sake I gotta read about Ianthe soon to? -ugh I just want some smut and it's only page nine. -Feyre you can roll your eyes. God knows I am. - Oh hey Ianthe, go Fuck yourself Ianthe. -You definitely revived something from Rhys hands Feyre, but it was far more pleasurable than torture. -Lucian I won't ship you and Elaine. But please, for the love of God, kill Ianthe. -Oh hell fucking ni, Jurian, go fucking Fuck yourself and stay the Fuck away. -Oh snap, Nesta and Elaine already so powerful they can drain the cauldron. -Oh snap, Feyre laying down these facts. Also that's how I spell Miryaim's name. -Feyre you savage. -Jurian, talk about Elaine like that again and I will kill you. -Oh Fuck off Ianthe, I've read enough of you. -Okay Lucian, my heart is softening towards you. -God I missed you Alis. -Damn summer solstice is giving me goosebumps. -Rhys you are giving me life. -Uh Oh, Tamlin's getting jealous of friendship. -YOU FUCKING BURNED THEIR WINGS. -Ahhh Feyre you also cringing about Elaine being fucked by a fire blooded male?? Let me introduce to Azriel. He's far better in my opinion. -All these painting titles... we're they like, working title for Acowar. -Rhysand you get that tongue to work. -Also Tam you prick. -TAMLIN YOU MOTHERFUCKING PRICK HOW WOULD YOU LIKE A WHIPPING. -God Alis, my bae. -Feyre slit her throat. -Yes Feyre Fuck this bitch up. -Oh these twins. Can you fucking not. - Go Lucian Go. -Bring on Part Two. -"He can get in line," Feyre getting a list of people who wanna kill her to rivals Aelins. -Oh for Fuck sake, everything was going so well, until Lucian's brothers showed up. -OMG CASSIAN YOU'RE BACK. -AZRIEL MY CUPCAKE. -"There's no such thing as a High Lady," bitch excuse me. -Cassian you melt my stone cold heart. -Mor my darling. -OMG IT'S HAPPENING, RHYS IS COMING. -Amren, boo. Hru? -Lucian being called a girl, I'm dying -AGH RHYS. -"Go find somewhere else to be," I know what that means. -The smut was worth it. -Oh I missed the banter of my baby bats. -And Rhys' swearing begins. -Cassian sunning his wings. I wonder if a certain Nesta sees. -Cassian trying to be chill around Nesta is my new aesthetic. -Nesta reads romance. Hell Yes. -"You come between a male and his mate, Nesta Archeron, and you're going to learn about the consequences the hard way." Trying to foreshadow something there Cassian? I Ship. -No is mentioning the sorrow and longing in Cassian eyes, Feyre, for the same reason no one mentioned it when Rhys looked at you all those months ago. -Reading about Elaine is painful. -I'm relating to Elaine and all those open curtains too much... shit. -Cassian you're to precious. -I missed the Amren/Cassian banter so much. -Shit Mor is getting pissed. -Feyre keeps calling Rhys mate and I'm feeling bad for the Australian readers. -"Because I can't stay away" well Fuck me if they ain't mates. -Nesta looking as Cassian like he's the only one in the room. -Damn right there was a reason Lucian wore a fox mask. -Idk what to write but the nessian at pg.203. gahhhhhhh. -"Surely Nesta wasn't anything he couldn't handle," omfg Feyre, it's hilarious of you to think that. -Feyre were you not there for Acomaf. He was very clearly, cocky then. -Library sex? I'm in. -oh, so no library sex. -To the Bone Carver we go. RIP. -Oh so, the Carver, and the Wearer are- I'd be shocked only I read that spoiler. -Oh so the Carver is a mirror type of perosn? What even is a mirror person? Is it his kink? -Oh Nesta having death powers. -Feyre constantly calling Rhys mate tho. -Tbh all I wanna know is who or what the carver appeared to Cassian. -Everyone in this book be complementing Rhys good taste. -Ah Az and Elaine be starting. Az be carrying his ship. -Poor Cassian. Nesta will come around, I promise, I read the spoiler. -YES AZRIEL SHOW HER THE GARDEN. I'VE READ THIS SPOILER PAGE SO MUCH AND NOW IT'S MINE. -You know, I wrote a fanfiction about Az and Elaine in a garden and her calling his scars pretty. They kissed in it. -"Azriel isn't the ravishing type," Rhys you should read the fanfic I wrote about him. He loves to ravish. -omg Cassian calming Nesta- ugh how many more pages until this kiss? -Az, sunning your wings for Elaine? How scandalous. -"Why not make them mates?" Feyre babe I'm asking the same question. -FEYRE YOU SHIP ELRIEL TOO? Oh sweetie I love you more than Cassian rn. -Rhysand, let Feyre play matchmaker. -I was about to bash Kier for insulting Az, but Az got this shit. -Oh not this fucking Eris bitch again. -Rhys the Fuck you playing at? -Okay, ngl I know Mor is gay but those Eris know? Ffs. -Okay everyone is fighting and I'm more intrigued than I should be. -D'as Nessian. -Double d'aw Elriel. -Pg.303 and back to sassy Az. -Sassy Az KS giving me life. -It was at page 306 that I realised I was in love with Az. -Nephelle's be giving me goosebumps. -Yes bathtub scent with Rhys. -Oh it's actually a massage scene? I'm in. -Feyre are you trying to start a war? Cassian flying with Nesta. Dammit who am I kidding I wanna see that. -Yes Az, help Elaine in the garden. I am sailing this ship. -Nesta watching Cassian lick his fingers and I'm like, now imagine that kissing elsewhere. -Nes? I ship. -Some shit happening in the library. -ohhhh so we finally reached the part where people wonder if Elaine is a seer. -Yes Feyre, put Elaine's riddles together. -Okay that scene was intense but Nessian at the end was calming. -"Amren on the hunt," a novel by sjm. -Damn Az, took you awhile but bravo, she's a seer. God it couldn't be any easier to love you. -Lucian I swear to God if you die, looking for this sixth queen, I will kill you. -Also where is my Suriel. -Shit Alis don't die. -oh FFS, look, "king" of Hybren, old buddy. If you'd kindly fuck off. Only it's late, I don't need these plot twists. -Look, "King," I'd pay good money to see you try and take Feyre. -Rhys if you could destroy my upcoming exams the way you did those ships, I'd be grateful. -pg.379, more smut, hell yes. -pg.381, Nesta all concerned. -The amount of sex feysand are having. That wingspan must be truly impress you Feyre darling. -So Cassian is terrible at complements. -Ah yes boys, bringing up that wingspan again. -This Nessian tho. -"she threatened to freeze my balls off," Kallias, Viviane, welcome to my heart. -I'm in love with Viviane. -God sake, Tamlin Fuck off. -Tamlin, let me tell you, Rhys and Feyre have fucked so much I'm sure he could recount every noise she is capable of making. -Fucking shut up Tamlin. -Eris if you'd kindly shut the Fuck up too, it'd be a pleasure. -Pg.438, Nesta, damn, *blows kisses.* -nvm of 439, Go Feyre. Slay. -Helion.... wait... look I can't go around loving all these people. It makes me look like I have a heart. -You know I'd be surprised at Lucian being a whole, some air of dawn court, but I already read that spoiler. -Okay mor is gay why is- you know what, never mind, I give up. -Oh. Oh Fuck. -lol, I'm so tired, whenever I hear the wall mentioned all I can think of is humpty dumpty. -"Don't even start," Nesta, sweetie, we've been shipping this since the last book. -Part three here I come. -btw this is still the same day for me. I've read up to part three in a few hours. It's two in the morning. Never underestimate a fangirl deprived of her smut. -Jurian just has to show up, doesn't he. -idk who I am to believe anymore. -I wanna say Fuck this shit I'm out. But I am so in. -So am I meant to trust Jurian or not. -Damn Tarquin. -Nessian will kill me quicker than these plot twists. -Ayyy more shut, god I love you Sarah. -Yes, the Suriel is coming into play bitches. I'd been surprised by what happens only I've seen this spoiler too. -Okay first thing first, Ianthe please Fuck off Secondly rip Suriel 2K17. -Cassian what happened. Nesta please. I know the ending and shit but tf happened. -Feyre be joining up these dots about which way Mor floats. -This, Varian, Amren thing, yeah I'd like another five books of it. -Awww, Az, you're to sweet and selfless. -I'm so tired IDK how to feel anymore. -Oh greatttt, Feyre got hit with an arrow. Any more plot twists. -Wait Tamlin? Fuck, ugh. -d'aw, Elaine kissed his cheek. -it's four in the morning. I have less than one hundred pages left. -Shit. -Fucking hell Elaine stab them bastard. -Also Nessian hell yes. -Also...wait what's happening. -Rhysand you fucking bastard it's five in the morning don't do this to me. I know you live god dammit don't fucking do this. -oh thank fuck that's all settled. -This book. These plot twists. These ships. It's all so heart wrenching and shit. -Wait is she flying over Velaris in her lingerie. -Fuck it's half five in the morning. I read this book in under 24 hours. I need to sleep. *hours later* -omfg I need to read this shit again. It was so good. The High Lords, the banter, the near death experiences. The romance. The sass. Sarah you queen. -if the at least the novellas don't have nessian or Elriel tho I may be tempted to cry. And that, my friends, is a snippet of the roller coaster if thoughts and emotions I went through. I was too tired to cry during it but my heart was successfully ripped out a few times.

[jmkitsune]

50 (yes fifty!!) Things You’ve Never Been Asked…. Let’s lighten the mood & have some fun! I always enjoy reading these and seeing a quick glimpse into my friend’s lives. (Just copy this & change the answers..😁)

Thank you for the tag @ruaniamh​

I have a couple of these to catch up on too lol.

1. What is the colour of your hairbrush?

black and purple

2. Name a food you never ever eat.

a LOT of food lol but without a hesitation to- anything with teriyaki 

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?

I'm usually too warm.

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

trying to will myself out of bed to shower and start the day

5. What is your favourite candy bar?

uhhh i guess I’d have to say white chocolate

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game?

Yes.

7. What is the last thing you said out loud?

where the hell is the other basket (laundry)

8. What is your favourite ice cream?

strawberry and vanilla 

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?

water (gotta get yours 64 oz a day)

10. Do you like your wallet?

dont use a wallet

11. What was the last thing you ate?

uhhhh a sammich last night

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

last thing I got was my Henley shirt back in Jan soo no

l13. The last sporting event you watched?

I haven’t watched sports since the last world cup lol

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

i dont really eat popcorn but when I do its movie theater sooo 

15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to?

Britt, we’re debating if Tifa is a top or bottom and I said Tifa is a power bottom and Cloud is a submissive Top, she got pissed at me I think lol

 16. Ever go camping?

Yes. and while I’m not the biggest fan of nature, I liked camping THEN cause it was w my ex- im one of those people where my enjoyment of things is hella dependent on who im with during said thing

17. Do you take vitamins?

i do not

18. Do you go to church every Sunday?

do I look like someone who goes to church

19. Do you have a tan?

eh not really

20. Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza?

burn both and keep em away from me

21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?

nope

22. What color socks do you usually wear?

White

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit?

well I don’t drive sooo

24. What terrifies you?

being left behind/abandoned, failing people I care for, sensory deprivation

25. Look to your left, what do you see?, the ps4, my capsule corp hat

my water, my controller, my phone 

26. What chore do you hate most?

Cleaning the bathroom.

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?

my friend @hexvexed​ trying to say No, Boat, Arkansas and other words that I’ll inevitably laugh cause hearing them say things is probably a cure for depression some times :D (I like the aussie accent soo sue me its up there with scottish and irish)

28. What’s your favorite soda?

root beer, vanilla coke

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive?

dont care either way

30. What is your favourite number?

don’t have one

31. Who’s the last person you talked to?

Daisy, talkin bout the FF7 remake and how gamers are mad (SHOCKER) over stupid shit

32. Favourite cut of beef?

the kind I’m not eating?

33. Last song you listened to?

All Around Me - Flyleaf (shower tunes are usually flyleaf, paramore, halestorm or something like that)

34. Last book you read?

the stars we steal AND I LOVED IT you can go get it here

https://www.amazon.com/Stars-We-Steal-Alexa-Donne/dp/1328948943

think Jane Austen romance meets the bachelor IN SPACE

it includes a plus sized protagonist, a canon Lesbian best friend who doesn’t die (and is unashamedly out)- who has gay dads, a proper ACE guy in a courting ceramony who is all like “ehh im in this cause my parents said so, but I’m not gonna lie I’d be ok with a friend not a wife to have kids with lol” and a MURDER MYSTERY!!!

its good I promise

35. Favourite day of the week?

i dont get people who have favorite days of the week >.> ngl

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards?

the Alphabet backwards :D

37. How do you like your coffee?

i dont

38. Favourite pair of shoes?

my boots

39. The time you normally get up?

uhhh which time? I’m up off and on from the minute I go to sleep

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets?

sunsets

41. How many blankets on your bed?

1

42. Describe your kitchen plates.

black

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment?

Small, not enough counter space.

44. Do you have a favourite alcoholic drink?

I stopped drinking back in 2014-2015, last time I drank I had rum and coke and the bartender gave me TOO MUCH rum and it was a wasted drink, but I took some of Stephs strawberry hard lemonade I think instead, it wasn’t bad but it was just to wash the excess flavor of rum away

45. Do you play cards?

not anymore really

46. What colour is your car?

here is where I’d point to my car IF I HAD ONE

47. Can you change a tire?

Lol, nope- that is what calling for a mechanic/road side assistance is for

48. Your favourite state?

state of happiness, it eludes me, she is a cruel and fickle mistress but the chase reminds me of Eleven and River, constantly out of sync but those brief meetings are worth it

49. Favourite job you’ve had?

writing/streaming

50. How did you get your biggest scar?

uhhh its pretty much gone now but I was thrown against a curb as a kid split my head open, had six stitches xD

[28-11s]

i’m going to start off this post with an apology for disappearing again, especially before valentine’s day. i was trying to hold back from doing it so i could spend the 14th with you and finally ask you out on a date but my need to ghost prevailed and well. yeah. it’s been rough like it hasn’t been in months, (and i think you understood it since i haven't posted here in days) but i guess it is because i’ve been dealing with constant uneasiness? i’m actually not sure what’s wrong, though. do you ever feel anxious even when things are going well? like, you cannot sleep or focus on your work or do anything really because you’re too busy feeling overwhelmed? it’s horrible, especially when you cannot pinpoint the reason and so you end up just locking yourself away. we're going to blame mercury retrograde and not my mental health, tho. especially since sun and mercury are in pisces. 🤕 🤢 i’m sorry for being so distant both physically and emotionally and just... not being there for you. the worst thing about me ghosting is in fact not knowing what to say once i feel better. i can write here rather easily but the moment i have to dm you i feel awkward and guilty and i never know how to act... i’m not good at saying sorry but appearing randomly after days without saying anything makes me feel even worse, so i never know how to be. but anyway, that’s not what I want to talk about in this message. i needed to feel better the other day so i checked the padlet and found the message that you wrote a month ago… it hit me a lot and kinda really resonated with me. it sucks how late I saw it and I feel really bad since you opened up to me so well and idk, it’s like i looked down at your effort by not replying immediately, even though it was involuntarily. but i cannot just ignore it so here’s my (late) reply to all of that. first of all, let me tell you how much i appreciate the straightforwardness of that message. it gave me an input on how you have been feeling and it also made me feel closer to you, especially considering the fact that i can strongly relate. not gonna lie, I hadn’t cried (like, actually cried with sobs and all that shit) in months but i couldn’t even reach the middle of the message because i literally couldn’t see SHIT. knowing you have been struggling with these emotions is… devastating? to try and explain: it’s like the whole world came crashing down. this whole ghosting thing isn’t something i can actually get mad at you for, because i know how exhausting life can get and how comforting being alone can be. as you can see, i do that a lot, too…  which is why i make “excuses” for you. of course, when it gets to three weeks it stings and i do get annoyed at times . but it’s not something i will crucify you over? especially because it would be super hypocritical of me. so, please, don’t ever think that you’re “taking advantage of me” or whatever, because you’ve been nothing but amazing to me for the past years and i literally /know/ that i couldn’t do better than this even if i tried to. you’re one of the few good things in my life rn and if i haven’t gone completely insane yet is thanks to you too. and while i'm happy you do know that i sincerely treasure you a whole lot, i can't help but get worried because of you being insecure. you're human and like everyone else, you experience lack of confidence, and honestly i'm glad you told me about it. more than insecure, i’d say i’m way too paranoid for my own good. i often get ugly thoughts that try to make others look like they’re out to get me and i always have to stop, take a deep breath and remind myself that not everyone is trying to hurt me, but i also get those moments of "what if". what if i say this and sound weird or what if i talk too much about myself and make royal uncomfortable by coming off as vain. and there are times where i hesitate or straight up don’t post on the blog because i don’t want to burden you with /my/ emotions, so i understand that too well. but we've talked about this so many times: we both have to fix these problems, but you know it won't happen overnight and every single little step counts, even if it requires lots of courage and trust. i don't think you realize how happy it makes me when you reach out randomly or open up to me directly. it makes me feel trusted, worthy and useful, so please don't villainize yourself for being human and wanting to share your feelings with others. you're far from being toxic and you need to finally understand that you're not putting any kind of pressure on me and being able to help you, even if just by listening, helps me as well. we deal with situations and feelings that are similar and i've found a solution to my problems the times we've opened up to each other. but lol. that part right there about you being self serving pissed me off so fucking bad, you have no idea. when i say i cannot find a single flaw in you, i mean it. i know it might sound fake or exaggerated but it's true. you’re one of the kindest and most selfless people i know and it's hard to even imagine you as selfish or “self serving”. i want you to think for a minute. do you think you’ve ever done anything to me to get you the title of self serving? i have a really good memory when it comes to you and i can assure you are far from being that. you have NEVER asked for anything, you have NEVER made me feel wrong or treated me badly. obviously i don't know what happened in your previous relationship and even after * dmed me to befriend me and then ask me to deliver you that message, i’ve been meaning to ask you about your dating history since i don’t think i have ever seen you as upset as you were those times, but it felt like i was being nosy and out of place so i just sucked it up and moved on. ngl though, i have been curious about it. both because i want to learn something new about you and because i want to be prepared. i told you about keo and how he mostly affected my self-esteem, so i kinda feel bad for not knowing about what has affected /you/ in the past. folds hands. let me also add something. me being scared of confrontation isn’t an excuse for us to avoid talking directly about certain things. if we keep on avoiding any kind of serious talking 1) i’ll never learn how to deal with it 2) i think we’ll be missing out on a huge part of relationships and on the long run it will show. and i’m not exactly scared of confrontation. i’m scared of hurting you by saying something wrong. i get so defensive /and/ passive aggressive for no reason when i feel the mood shift and it makes me say really mean things just to get a reaction out of people. but i’ll never be able to fix it if i don’t start talking with my own partner. but still. you’ll have to be the one to bring it up if you want to because i’m still a scaredy-cat after all and i’ll never start anything. <3 you have also talked about me deserving better and it reminded me of all the times i’ve said you do deserve someone better and you said that you don’t care because i’m the one you want. it goes both ways, really. there is someone out there for me, even more than one person, but just like there is someone else out there for you too. but it literally does not matter to me if someone is waiting, because i don’t want them. i want You. you're the love of my life and my best friend and i seriously cannot imagine my life without you. i can promise you that i will be here by your side. we can be scared of being vulnerable together. LMFAOOOOO WHY IS THIS SO LONG I'M SO SORRY FUCK AND I AM NOT EVEN DONE SINCE YOU POSTED ANOTHER MESSAGE ON THE PADLET AND I WANNA REPLY TO THAT TOO. yes it takes me days to reply to one (1) singular message yes i live like this. anyway the latest message put me in such a good mood. your care package isn't here yet but i can already tell that it is going to work perfectly. but?! your hobby is literally naming pets after food or things and honestly? i respect that life. i still remember when you talked about wanting to get a cat to name it pancake. 🥺 i hope you took pictures of your friend's dog, though. 😡 and on god i knew something was gonna happen to you. kisses your wrist and puts a bandaid on it. the fact that you're still running around sleep-deprived and with a sprained wrist is so You. fucking sagittarius sun gemini rising headass. but OMFG I USED TO LISTEN TO THAT SONG WHEN I WAS A KID. you brought back so many memories. </3 while my baby was being a busy bee, i was busy being Lazy. my week has been kinda ok? i've been spending my days watching stuff on netflix but now i'm sad because i saw a possible spoiler of the drama that i am currently watching aND . I DIDN'T SPEND THE LAST FOUR DAYS CRYING FOR THEM TO PULL THIS SHIT. also since there is straight up a coronavirus outbreak in my region, all the schools are closed and the shops have to close down at 6pm so i don't have to work at the office this week! a win! kinda! if we ignore the reason why i can stay home! will that stop me from going out though? absolutely not. x today i went to the gym despite the warnings lolz and i even passed out so fr who's doing it like me! then i went grocery shopping and i napped for like 6 hours. i had an appointment with my old school's head master scheduled for tomorrow since we have to talk about uni and stuff but they cancelled it :/// so i'll spend my day maybe doing some work and Sleeping. anyway. this message is a big mess but  i mith you so bad and i feel so shitty for disappearing and i'm over being a ghost so! we're sleeping together tonight. :)

[the-little-prophet]

CHARACTER QUESTIONNAIRE: CHARLIE LITTLE 

ORIGINS & FAMILY: Name: Charles Boon-Mee Kai Little   Nickname: Charlie, Kai (Kai is Charlie’s chu len-- or Thai nickname.) Reason for name: Charles’ father wanted Charlie to have an English name first and foremost and named Charlie after himself. Boon-Mee is Charlie’s Thai name which means “good fortune.” Kai was the nickname that his mother chose because he was born early and was very small. Kai means chicken. ;) Age: 19 Gender: Male Place of birth: Swynlake, England Places lived since: Nowhere! Number of siblings: Charlie has one stepbrother from his mother’s second marriage. He usually only sees them when he visits his mother-- usually twice a year, hardly ever more. 

Relationship with family (close? estranged?): Dad–Charles “Buck” Little used to be a pro baseball player from Los Angeles California, but an injury early on in his career benched him and ended that career. Instead, Charles “Buck” Little became an insurance agent and got a job working at InterPride until Taka Lyons took over and fired half his department. That was four years ago. Now Buck gets disability insurance and works at Pride U in their IT department.

Mum- Dr. Phailin Dilsworth, formerly Little, formerly Chaisurivirat. First-generation American, became a college professor and found a job teaching at Pride University where she had her first child, Charlie. She was NOT into the magick-friendly thing as much as Charles was and wanted to move for a long time. She blamed Swynlake as a big part as to why Charlie had his chronic sleeping disorder. Eventually she got a job teaching in a school down in Bournemouth and left Charlie and Buck when he was 9 years old. She remarried when he was 10 and moved with her husband, who was also a professor, to Toronto. Charlie talks to his mom on the phone every month or so and sees her for a few weeks in the summer/every other Christmas.

Sylvester Dilsworth- Charlie’s stepbrother-- same age-- who thinks Charlie is a #freak for growing up in Swynlake, aka England’s great failed experiment. Wants to go into Psychology like his dad (thinks Charlie is #crazy). Charlie does not like Syl.

PHYSICAL Height: 5’6 (teeny) Weight: 125 ish idk height Build: Charlie has always been very short since he was a child and grew very slowly. He’s kinda still hoping he’ll put on another inch or two before he’s done growing but… looking pretty hopeless Nationality: English Disabilities (physical or mental, including mental illnesses): Charlie has severe astigmatism in his eyes. He’s severely sleep-deprived and suffers from dissociative episodes. Complexion (freckles, acne, skin tone, birth marks): Olive-toned skin, and a few moles on his face and neck. Often times cuts himself shaving (does it like every few days) and so he’ll have tiny nicks here and there. Also misses lil hairs all the time, look he’s trying Distinguishing facial features: His very big thick glasses lmao and he’s got quite pretty eyes in my opinion, even if they are hidden behind his messy fringe and big, thick glasses.  Round cherub cheeks.

Hair color: Black. Usual hair style: Messy and long-- Charlie never has time to brush his hair in the morning   Eye color: Dark brown Glasses? Contacts?: yes to both though contacts bother his eyes.

Style of dress/typical outfit(s): Charlie comes from a middle-class family and dresses like a typical Brit-- sweaters over collared shirts, that kind of thing. He leans toward hipster-esque if only because he likes comfy sweaters because it’s easiest to fall asleep in haha, and he’s often seen around in pajama pants and zip up jumpers if he slept past his alarm and had no time to change. I would call his style “frumpy nerd chic.” Typical style of shoes: He wears a lot of Toms because they are comfy and easy to slip on, so you know, better than sandals. Health (is this person usually sick? or very resilient?): Chronically sleep-deprived, Charlie also suffers from migraines. He’s noticed that if he has bad migraines one day, he’ll probably have a night terror. Which stresses him out. And makes the migraine worse. Otherwise, Charlie is a relatively healthy young boy, with pollen allergies in the spring but no other sensitivities.   

Grooming (does she/he wear makeup? shower daily? wear only clean clothes? pluck her eyebrows?): NGL this could be better but it’s not his fault he’s just very tired. He does take a shower nearly every day (cold showers to wake him up) and does his own laundry so he had clean clothes. But he often does not brush his hair and wears hats to make up for it. Jewelry? Tattoos? Piercings?: None thus far! He does wear a watch. Accent?: Typical brit Unique mannerisms/physical habits: He rubs his eyes a lot and toys with his hair. He cleans his glasses both as a compulsion and because a lot of the time when he tries to rub his eyes he will hit his glasses and need to clean them from all the finger smears.   Athletic?: He’s pretty fast and limber due to yoga and many years spent running from disasters, whether real or imagined. But Charlie won’t be beating anybody up lol INTELLECT Level of education: Completed a nurse’s assistantship and has a pheblotomist’s license. Taking uni courses on the side, hopes to one day be a proper doctor/surgeon. Level of self esteem: Medium-low. Charlie feels like a burden to his father and a freak to other people even though he knows he can’t help his condition. Years of therapy mean he’s pretty in touch with his sense of self though so while he beats himself up, he does have coping mechanisms. He also knows he is trying his best !! Gifts/talents: An excellent drawer, a pretty great cook, and a hard worker. He also has a lot of practical life skills. He’s a practical guy. Shortcomings: He can struggle to concentrate because of his health issues, he’s pretty cowardly and paranoid, he overreacts, he’s a bit socially awkward (not in a shy kind of way-- Charlie is actually outgoing ish but because he doesn’t have many friends he doesn’t understand a lot of the social cues. His desperation for friendship is also Not Attractive). Style of speech (loud, mumbler, articulate, etc.): Nervous talker for sure. Doesn’t stammer, just goes on and on and on. Definitely overshares when nervous. “Left brain” or “right brain” thinker?: Left-brained.Charlie is deductive, rational, and wants to be a doctor someday. His secondary -claw is super strong and he craves an explanation for things and hates that he doesn’t have one for his night terrors. The fact that it could be magic also doesn’t comfort him but scares him, despite growing up in Swynlake (hey he thought he was a Mundus all the time ok!) beccause he doesn’t uNDeRstanD and can’t conTrol it. Artistic?: Yes, uses charcoal and pastels. Mathematical?: Yes, he’s p good at math. Languages? Just English. He once spoke in Tongues during one of his Doomer episodes but that was probably a glitch haha. His mother never taught him any Thai.

Makes decisions based mostly on emotions, or on logic?: Logic, always logic.

Neuroses: Thinks World Is Ending At All Times

Life philosophy: uh don’t die? Do the good you can with the tools you have. Be Prepared-- Two is one, and one is none (aka hvae two of everything; its a prepper mantra). 

Religious stance:  Is starting to explore aspects of buddhism which is tied to his Thai culture (something he’s very distanced from especially because his mother no longer lives with him and she was pretty removed from it too) and hopes will help him with his night terrors.

Cautious or daring?:  Cautious Optimist or pessimist?: Pessimist- the world is literally always ending.

Extrovert or introvert?: Ambivert, leaning to introversion. If Charlie had friends, he’d probably prefer smaller get togethers and that kind of thing but he would totally socialize and likes talking to people and working together in group projects charlie it is so sad that school is your main form of interaction.   Level of comfort with technology: Very comfortable. True millennial. Instagram, Twitter, FB, blog. He depends on his phone and computer a lot for his social life/coping mechanisms. He definitely has internet friends who are doomers like him.

RELATIONSHIPS Current marital/relationship status: Single Sexual orientation: Bi. Charlie doesn’t really think about romance that much because he’s mostly preoccupied with Death but he had a crush his bff as a smol boy (who was also a smol boy) and also has crushed on girls from afar (and tbh probably kinda crushes on Minnie a bit because she’s so pretty and kind to him). He never really questioned it and so its a nonissue for him. He would like to have a romantic life one day but kinda thinks its impossible like who would like him he’s CRAZY. He can’t even sleep a whole night thru let alone with another person in the bed.

Past relationships: As a boy, he had a crush on his bff at the time--Nate. Nate’s family moved away following one of Swynlake’s disasters bc they weren’t gonna fuck with that shit.

A social person? (popular, loner, some close friends, makes friends and then quickly drops them): Charlie is not afraid to strike up conversation and sort of accepts his reputation as a Crazy Person so that helps deal with any social anxiety (he’s too busy with his generalized anxiety thanks hahahah.) He has a few people in his classes who are willing to work with him on projects and stuff, a few internet friends-- but otherwise he considers a lot of the patients at the hospital his friends… problematic charlie ur friends r gonna die

Most comfortable around (person): His...cat? SECRETS Life goals: Charlie has always wanted to be a doctor. He wants to be able to respond to medical emergencies like the ones that he’s seen, so he’s thinking of trauma surgery but is open to other paths (he’s also pretty interested in neuro because of his own disorder; he also loves kids, so pediatrics). Just as long as he can help people.   Dreams: it would be nice to have a normal one whats that like   Greatest fears: Death, dying, disaster. And that he’ll be helpless in the face of all that and can’t save the ones that he loves. Also that he’s gonna be a lowkey embarrassment to his father for the rest of his life. Most ashamed of: His night terrors and the fact that he drove his mom away (he didn’t). Compulsions: Snacking. He snacks a lot during the night and when he watches tv. Obsessions: Watching the Golden Girls a lot, also the impending apocalypse which he had been prepping for since he was small.   Secret hobbies: ...being a prepper…. Is that a hobby…astronomy also thats more normal !! Secret skills:... prepping… Crimes committed (and was he/she caught? charged?): none thank god What he/she most wants to change about his/her current life: Find a cure for his illness/curse What he/she most wants to change about his/her physical appearance: Charlie would really like to be TALL. His dad is very tall and he got none of those genes and he feels like a pipsqueak and kind of helpless and he sort of is. So number one: TALL. Then he’d like to not have glasses and one day wants to get laser eye surgery to correct his vision, especially if he wants to be a surgeon.

DETAILS/QUIRKS Night owl or early bird?: Night Owl bc he’s terrified of sleeping. Light or heavy sleeper?: heavy sleeper. When he is sleeping, nothing can wake up but like, his dreams or his father shaking and yelling at him. He sleeps like he’s dead lmao Favorite food: Spicy food is his fave. Loves sushi, also loves chips and potato crisps and snack foods in general. When he’s too tired to cook, he’ll just eat an entire bag of crisps.   Least favorite food: Charlie isn’t a fan of a lot of red meats, like burgers and stuff. Favorite book: uhhhh mmmmm charlie isnt a big reader, he’s usually watching television. If he’s reading, he’s reading medical cases and articles.   Least favorite book:  horror story books Favorite movie: old musicals, honestly-- Hello Dolly, Pajama Game, that kind of thing. Very soothing. Probably LOVES It’s A Wonderful Life. Least favorite movie: horror movies leave him alone Favorite song: gosh idk Least favorite song: idk eIETHER probably does not metal Crunchy or smooth peanut butter?: crunchy Lefty or righty?: leftY Favorite color: green or brown Cusser?: er, a bit, normal youngin. He doesn’t curse in front of adults though he’s pretty good about that. Smoker? Drinker? Drug user?: Charlie has had a few drinks here and there a social drinker if anything. Though he does wonder if drinking a lot could squash the dreams though this is a bad path for him to wander down. He has also thought the same about #drugs but is kind of a wimp and so he hasn’t tried any...yet Biggest regret: Charlie feels like he was a big part of the wedge that drove his mother to divorce his father because they had diff ways of dealing with charlie’s condition aka-- his mother wanted to deal with it and his father didn’t. This isnt really true, just another thing the two disagreed on. Pets?: A cat that his mom left behind! She’s old and fat and grey and her name is Emily