#that question may or may not be relevant to a secret project lmao

[theputterer]

*shows up an hour late with starbucks only to realize we never had an appointment* This is awkward. To make it less awkward, answer some questions for me. What song makes your body go 'oh, we should flail about to this!', what is a weird fact more people should know, and what is the ideal beverage to sip upon when it's pleasantly warm (without being too hot) outside?

aww Rifle it's always good to hear from you <3

I saw I SAW THE TV GLOW this past weekend and it Unhinged Me and i have been mainlining its soundtrack like nobody's business since. it is a great soundtrack that really Gets the dual horror and euphoria of being a teenager. a standout is "Starburned and Unkissed" by Caroline Polachek that I am obsesssedddd with

the middle name of the great American science-fiction writer known as Philip K. Dick is Kindred. Philip Kindred Dick. (his mother's maiden name was Kindred). but it is a very prescient name once you know he had a twin sister who died at six weeks old; and once you know that, you'll never stop seeing her and the idea of the "phantom twin" in his writing

a second weird fact that suggests EVERYThING IS CONNECTED: the man who invented the x-acto knife is the father of Louise Glück, the wonderful American poet.

and similarly, but possibly more relevant to your interests: here in Ireland, the mines in Glengowla were active in the latter half of the nineteenth century where they dug up gold, quartz, marble, and galena. the galena was shipped to neighboring Britain where it was made into bullets and then exported to the United States, which was experiencing a civil war at the time.

at the same time, the irishmen (because it was men) working in the mine would order supplies to be shipped to them from America because it was somehow *cheaper* to do so than to either make or buy tools in Ireland. there are wood ladders still in the mine today (can't be brought out or they'll fall apart in the non-mine air) that were once American trees. it's! all! connected!

ideal beverage to sip when it's pleasantly warm... a cup of black tea with milk that has cooled a bit so you can drink it without scalding your tongue.

this has been fun Rifle and really funny and pretty impeccable timing because I was legit thinking about messaging you to get your opinion on: a Saw Gerrara in a modern real-life world who is not a soldier: what does he do for a living???

[unproduciblesmackdown]

How do u feel about Eno from MonsterKind?

closes book & spins around in chair—oh! didnt see you there. well i’m glad you asked. sets down cup i was drinking from.

tldr i quietly cherish him. i figure it is not exactly his best look right now but i would be surprised if it was to turn out he is/was secretly evil & trying to work against everybody the whole time lmao…..honestly i figured that things were doomed in this way when kip said he trusts eno the most…….that can’t go unpunished. rip

but it is also an endorsement that he must’ve been top quality all this time if kip trusts him that much. i doubt its as Misguided as just being taken advantage of. no idea what the broader con here needs to further take advantage of re: kip….the fact that ppl listen to him whether he likes it or not? or that he can probably survive mad low temps? if he was assumed to die back in the day then the latter seems somewhat relevant one way or another. but i am too dumbassed to make good guesses w/little info

anyways i’m kind of assuming…that eno does sort of have suspicions or straightforward knowledge abt what happened behind the scenes, & its being confirmed just by kip saying there’s some link b/w wallace & the investigation of yore…like, i know i just said im dumb as hell & my guesses are bad, but i’d guess eno thinks that their inside info getting out elsewhere was via himself, not yumi, despite what he said. or even technically if it couldve been yumi i think he thinks it was his own fault. and its not surprising he wouldnt bring up his own suspicious abt his self involvement because like after everything went to shit & the entire project seemingly destroyed, there’s not much relevance to investigating how it happened if nobody plans to be involved. and it would be a little awkward then & now for him to tell kip he thinks he may have been involved in the downfall, even if inadvertently…hm

like……it would be nice if he had secretly developed some kind of assassin level knife throwing skills in the past years. wouldnt it always be. but honestly kip was fuckt the whole time…….nobody seems to be threatening anyone else with knives but i guess if some shadow organization that murders at whim & unhindered shows up & makes threatening demands, the implication is that anyone could be killed, even if some people get to stay alive for the moment just for the sake of pushing them to do something or other thats convenient for whatever latest death plot is underway

e.g. i’m not sure what the point is of purposefully trying to put kip on alert besides having him fall back on eno even more than he would without bringing up that specific threat

but really besides the “well i’m already resigned to someone stabbing kip in the gut while killing everyone he knows in front of him w/promises to kill everybody else too” factor of it all (im not really but—) another reason i cant be that mad is b/c i am also resigned to the fact that wallace is basically in the same kind of position eno was, of an accidental accessory to secret murder

b/c it would truly be a twist if wallace WAS actually in on it the whole time lol….but i doubt it. but the fact remains that he is definitely unwittingly a pawn of the devil!! this wouldnt be a problem if, marxism. anyways the thing is that i really, really doubt that wallace will smoothly learn of whats actually going on before anyone else knows or anyone gets fucked over and be able to gently reveal this to everyone in ways that nobody feels betrayed or breaks their trust with him. i am not even sure how that would be possible…..it is basically inevitable that wallace will have to be exposed as connected to this whole secret society of nightmares, and nobody really knows wallace well enough to be certain that he actually didnt know. and really, the fact that he Doesn’t know doesnt change the fact that he is in fact a part of it and facilitating it, even tho arguably it isnt quite his fault

tbh im assuming that the reason he’s having to do all of this is that he was willing to be transplanted from a to c, and because of that he is like totally clueless about like….everything. he presumably has no idea the kinda shit everyone around him is worrying about like all the time lol & wouldnt know not to try to push past those boundaries. but he can’t exactly be asked to do anything that much different from what he’s doing now / anything too clearly Heinous…besides maybe getting Extra Info or simply making ppl nervous, like making kip think he’s endangered.

coz t.b.h……………i’m not sure that, between kip seeing wallace as harmless and well-intended vs dangerous & ill-intended, the latter is worse? because he is a mix of the two….he doesnt mean any harm but he IS dangerous, technically. not directly thru his own actions quite as much, but still, obviously……kips first impression was basically correct lol rip. i dont think there WAS a way for kip to ever not suspect wallace as being less than purehearted, and of course i also dont think he won’t have to find out that wallace doesn’t want to hurt everybody, but at least he’s a bit on guard about all this fuckery…..even if putting him more on guard is part of some evil plot, which also means its bad…….obviously ideally everyone gets to only ever be best friends and also all be kip’s boyfriends, but i don’t think i my wishes have a tendency to come true, so maybe wait on anticipating that one. in the meantime maybe the inevitable revelation that wallace may have been a double agent will be lessened if kip was holding out for it all along lol. i guess it depends on how much more inadvertent damages wallace’s role is intended to invoke. weird sentence there but i stand by it

basically like dude!! try Knowing Shit instead of not knowing shit!! he may only be an accidental hand of the devil but that doesnt mean he’s totally not working for satan here, so hopefully when he finally realizes the extent of it, he gets to help to right the situation. presumably. idk. but how would anyone know for sure that he never knew what was going on besides trusting that he is not just an excellent actor? i suppose we are in the same situation with eno, huh. despite being given kip’s endorsement, there is only a limited picture of him & then the knowledge that he probably played a part in all the bs w/all these ppl dying. i suppose you can guess that he knew all of what was going on or he didnt or somewhere in between….

basically w/wallace and eno i am assuming that with both itmd a case of well-meaning humans being taken advantage of and accidentally infiltrating these vulnerable circles and sending back information and oh oops, atrocities, and everyone’s dead. i cant imagine that at least kip is meant to survive, and not sure why eno would feel particularly safe on that front either, and clearly any casualties that seem even vaguely necessary can just be carried out at random so you know. bless wallace’s well meaning heart that doesnt know shit but like still, if ppl get fucked over they still have the right to be mad, and if theyre dead theyre still dead, and etc, and also try to learn shit even if it was just a regular, non Agent Of Evil job.

basically what i am trying to say is that im pulling up on my motorbike and telling people that if they’re going to be mad at eno, they ought to be equally condemning of wallace, or that is just inconsistent. like, feel free to either way surely…….i can’t guess that it’d be smooth sailing for eno either if he has to awkwardly divulge that maybe he knows stuff about the whole assassination backstory.

i do wish he had those knife throwing skills for sure…..wish he wasnt being gunpointed into pressuring kip into something or other that surely will endanger him & surely others….but i get why he doesnt exactly seem to have other options at the moment lol. this guy could have assassins all over the block if whatever godforsaken conspiracy is already underway and waistdeep. smh. as i have to assume that he would only endanger kip if he was basically being given a catch 22 of Endanger Kip or Endanger Kip. i suppose he could be doing it solely so he himself won’t be assassinated, but i am personally piecing together that he and kip Are Really in fact That Close & he hasn’t like, faked caring about him this whole time or something

uhhhh tldr i think of him as basically in the same position as wallace, tho to be fair i dont think of wallace as blameless part for not knowing whats going on (like im guessing eno didnt understand until it was too late) and in part because even without the devil he IS just barging in from a in the middle of c & also pursuing audiences w extra vulnerable ppl w/o knowing fuckall (unlike eno who i am also guessing is not from a…)

and perhaps the sole answer to your question as really i was only inferring the part abt asking if eno is suspicious and dubious or not: I Am Fond Of Him Like I Said

what an essay! as all my asks turn out to be!! but i can’t help but theorize. even though i am a dumbass. this is in part because i watched mh for years, and in part because i never assume i’ll still be alive to see any particular plot point in any ongoing media i consume, so i furiously speculate and create au’s in my head and all. for example if i die before its definitely revealed kip doesnt get twenty husbands—which, good luck proving that to me anyways—can anyone tell me he doesnt? no, because i died. so he definitely does. and thats all i have to say on the matter, thank you for tuning in to Milo’s Hour Of Speculation, And Knowing Everyone Is Kip’s Boyfriend

[sunnybimbo]

*sneaks inside askbox* Shunkeith? the most blofiest ship there is

it occurred to me halfway through writing this that you may have been asking for headcanons,,,, so expect some of those a little later today LMAO featuring hunk and keith trying to be domestic and only failing a little bit

(also, just a warning: this is barely edited! feel free to point out any errors okay love you bye!!!

edit: now on ao3!

“Are you sure this is a good idea?”

Keith paused midstep, eyes contemplatively glancing to theceiling before he shrugged. “Probably not. But we should try anyway.”

Hunk grunted, turning back to the space sewing machine whileKeith paced around the room, measuring and rolling the twine back into the ballthat the two of them had accidentally unraveled.

You see: Shiro had accidentally ripped his vest. All that hehad left to wear was his black undershirt, and he kept getting the shivers,despite it having been made of a thin material anyway. Keith and Hunk were, ofcourse, upset that their boyfriend was catching the sniffles because of a tinytear, and so decided to band together and fix it with their combined prowess.

As soon as they’d found the strange little sewing machineand got it working, they’d jumped around for joy (mostly Hunk’s doing) andaccidentally upended an entire box of string. It unraveled before either couldcatch it, and a few were subsequently kicked across the room, unrolling themcompletely (mostly Keith’s fault).

And so, Keith was focusing on cleaning the mess while Hunktried to learn the mechanics of the new machine and patch up Shiro’s vest withoutdamaging it beyond repair.

“You know, we definitely could have asked Coran forhelp. Or Allura, even.” Keith pointed out, half an hour into their ordeal.He’d finished two rolls, and was working on untangling a mess of pink.

Hunk paused, and the machine decided to rip out the stitchhe just made. With a muttered curse, he moved it back in place and started allover.

“We could have.” He agrees. “But won’t Shiroappreciate it more if it comes from us? It’s like… a lover’s gift. Orsomething like that.”

Keith shrugged, and Hunk tossed him a smile.

“Aren’t you having fun?”

Keith pulled a face at that, his nose scrunching up, andHunk couldn’t help but laugh. “That’s fair.”

For the better part of an hour, they worked in acompanionable silence. Hunk, despite his troubles with trying to get themachine to actually hold on to the string, it was going along rather well. Thevest was about halfway patched, and they’d be finished before anyone camelooking for them.

Keith had finished his task extremely quickly, as soon ashe’d gotten into the rhythm of it. Faint red marks lined his fingers from wherehe’d pulled too tight, but those were easily soothed by a few of Hunk’s kisses.

Then, just when Hunk was getting confident in his abilitiesusing the space sewing machine (which he’d decided to dub the spewchine.Totally rolled off the tongue.), it decided that enough was enough, andsputtered to a stop. Smoke plumed from the back, throwing the two boys into apanic at the thought of a fire.

It did little more than smoke, though, and once they’dcalmed down, Hunk pried it open to try and fix it.

“What’s wrong with it?”

“I think it’s just a gear that got thrown out ofplace.” Hunk grunted, trying to stuff half of his body in the tiny machineto fix said gear. “I don’t think I’ll be able to fix it unless we takethis to the workshop.”

He pulled his fingers out, and oil dripped from them like aleaky faucet. “Oh, whoops.” He wiped his hands off on his frontbefore he thought about it, and then he had greasy hands and a greasy chest.

He stood frozen where he stood, staring in horror at hisruined shirt, for so long that Keith couldn’t help but snort, smothering hislaugh against a closed fist.

Hunk huffed, his mouth twinging upwards in a small smile.“Oh, you think that’s funny?”

“Nope.” Keith said, deadpan as ever as hesidestepped around the dirty mess that was Hunk, prying Shiro’s vest from theevil spewchine’s clutches. “Maybe we can just finish by hand?”

“Do you think Alteans used sewing needles?”

“Only one way to find out.”

The two of them split up, then. Hunk went to clean off andto make sure Shiro was still occupied. He was, but only because Lance and Pidgewere distracting him in a game of chess. Or, well… Altean chess. Where ruleswere only relevant if you had enough pawns, and gravity was an illusion. OnlyPidge and Shiro seemed to understand the actual mechanics of the game, and Hunkgot so confused the first time they were shown it that he swore himself off thething.

But, yes. He was well distracted. Atleast for another hour.

This gave Keith plenty of time to hunt down the requiredmaterials. And so, he did the most logical course of action.

He asked Coran.

“Needles, you say?” Coran said, juggling the micefrom one hand as he gave them their check-up. “Like these?”

He lifted a needle full of medicine, and the mouse in hishand - Platt, if Keith wasn’t mistaken- screamed so loud that he passed out. Ormaybe he passed out because of the needle?

“Uh… well, kind of. Something like the endpiece.” Keith described. “With a hole at one end. I think they callit an eye? And you put thread through the eye, so you can fix clothing.”

Coran tossed the syringe over his shoulder. “Oh, ofcourse!” Then, with a few inputs into a nearby monitor, a port opened upand supplied them with an assortment of different sized needles. “Willthese do?”

Keith didn’t question where they came from, or why thesyringe didn’t break upon impact with the floor. Instead, he took the offeredneedles with an appreciative nod and left Coran with his veterinarian duties.

He met up with Hunk in his room, catching him just as hepulled a fresh and clean shirt above his head. He let out a startled scream asthe door opened, crossing his arms in front of him for privacy.

“Keith! Knock first.” he said, only mostly teasingas he squeezed his head in the shirt opening.

“Sorry.” Keith mumbled. “I found needles. Doyou want me to do it this time?”

Hunk paused, pulling out Shiro’s half-finished vest andshaking it free of any lint it had collected. “You can sew?”

Keith looked honestly offended at that insinuation. “Ofcourse I can.”

Hunk plopped down on the bed, and, once Keith settled on theother end, spread the vest between them. Keith quickly got to work, feeding thestring through the eye with surprising ease. His tongue stuck out in hisconcentration as he sewed a strong backstitch into the fabric.

He worked in pure silence, not unlike how they sat togetherbefore. Then, Hunk laid longways across the bed, head settling against Keith’soutstretch leg.

“I guess there’s a lot of little stuff we don’t knowabout each other, huh?”

Keith paused, glancing over at him. Then he gently pappedhis palm against Hunk’s forehead, offering him a smile. “We have plenty oftime to learn.”

This is what Shiro walked in on. His head peeked in, and thetwo scrambled to hide the project (without stabbing themselves with needles)before he saw.

“What are you two up to?” He asked, hiding a bemused smileas the vest slipped from their grasp and pooled at their feet. “Is that my…?”

Hunk heaved a dramatic sigh and plopped back on the bed.Keith gathered up the vest and handed it off to Shiro. “We were trying to fixit for you before you were finished playing.”

“But then we got attacked by a sewing machine.”

Shiro looked vaguely alarmed at that, but Keith waved offHunk’s dramatics easily. “If you don’t mind waiting a little longer, I shouldbe able to finish it soon.”

He looked between the two of them, both barely masking theirdisappointment that they couldn’t finish it in time. And so, Shiro slid ontothe bed between them and patted either side of him, motioning them closer. “Ifyou wouldn’t mind… I have a better idea.”

—

Hours later, after the excitement had died down, and Shirohad kissed his boyfriends silly for their hard work and their sweet gesture,found the team winding down with a nice pre-dinner drink. Lance and Shirosipped at their “coffee byproduct”, as Lance so fondly dubbed it, while Pidge,Keith, and Hunk tried a new type of tea Coran had whipped up.

“I’m still mad you beat me.” Pidge griped, swirling the teaaround the dainty little tea cup. Seemed the things were universal, even inspace. “Was it because I tried to bait you with a pawn, or…?”

Shiro shrugged his shoulders, leaning back in his seat. “Amagician never reveals his secrets.”

“If you cheated…” She vaguely threatens. Shiro reaches overto muss up her hair with a grin. “I’ll tell Allura and Coran on you.”

The four of them dramatically gasped, before falling outlaughing at the thought. Hunk polished off his tea in record time, and had justbegun to stand to grab the teapot for seconds when Shiro motioned for him tosit again.

“I’ll get it. I need a refill, anyway.”

He leaned over and pressed a kiss against Hunk’s temple,before turning in the opposite direction to kiss Keith against his cheek. “Beback in a tick.”

Lance was about to tease the young lovebirds, just as Shirostood and turned towards the kitchen. On his back was a large, stitched heart.One half was a vibrant red, and the other was a strong yellow. In the middle,exactly where Shiro had ripped his vest, was a long line of black thatconnected the pieces perfectly.

He shot Keith and Hunk and incredulous look, and they justembarrassedly shoved their faces back into their drinks, despite one having acompletely empty cup.

“Incredible.” He tossed his hands up in the air. Pidgesnorted, plucking his drink from his hands to steal some of his coffee forherself.

This would only be the beginning of their lovey-dovey phase,and the two of them were going to need buckets of it to survive to onslaught,no doubt.

Shiro returned quickly, with an extra cup for Hunk andKeith. He seemed to have forgotten he’d gone for more coffee for himself, butHunk and Keith gave him big kisses all across his face anyway, snuggling up ontheir side of the table.

Behind his back, Keith and Hunk hooked their hands together. With their free hands, they stole his as their own and cuddled him securely between their bodies. Shiro felt the two of them pass their fingers across his heart (that is, the heart on his back), and he melted into the touch. 

“Love you guys.” Her murmured, after stealing a sip from Keith’s cup. 

Hunk caught Keith’s eye, and the two of them shared a pleased grin. 

—

(And after dinner was over and the three decided to retire to their bedrooms together, nobody mentioned the tiny black hearts sewn on the shoulders of both Hunk’s and Keith’s usual outerwear, matching Shiro’s new patch in style.)