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allwaswell16 · 1 year ago

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Part 2 of a fic rec of spooky One Direction fics as requested in this ask. You can find part one here! If you enjoy the fics, please leave kudos and comments for the writers! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!

—Louis/Harry—

💀 Shadow Dances by @itsmotivatingcara

(M, 101k, FBI/Medium) Harry Styles was brought into the FBI for not only his skills, but his ability to mitigate the influx of spirits surrounding the elusive and obnoxiously infuriating sharp-tongued medium he’d been assigned to. Louis gets under his skin, he’s impulsive and a risk to the team according to Harry.

💀 Demon and Immortal (series) by delsicle / @eeveedel

(E, 90k, demon) Harry is a demon and Louis is his eternal mate.

💀 Suddenly Last Summer by @disgruntledkittenface

(E, 44k, mystery) Suddenly he has someone who listens to him and cares about what he thinks. Someone who really sees him. But their happily ever after is forever marred by an incident at a party during Labor Day weekend, and Louis is left with a choice to make.

💀 Mind of Stone by amomentoflove / @daggerandrose

(M, 41k, mythology) Louis gingerly moves around the statues, trying not to look at their faces. The room is quiet, probably a basement from the low ceiling. He mentally curses when he doesn’t see a door leading outside.

💀 Across The Lines by @creamcoffeelou

(E, 28k, haunted house) With a camera in hand, Louis sets off on the road trip of his life to explore the most famous haunted houses of the UK. Things don't exactly go to plan.

💀 Where the World has Come Together by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

(M, 26k, magic) For the crime of elven blood running through his veins, Louis Tomlinson spends his days protecting the human kingdom he’s been cast out of.

💀 If You Ever Did Believe by patdkitten

(E, 25k, haunted) While doing research for his newest book, he winds up in a quiet little village with a whole lot of ghost stories and rumours waiting to be discovered and a single man who happens to have just as many stories and rumours that follow him as well.

💀 In the Strangest of Ways by SunTomato / @sun-tomato

(NR, 17k, ghost) When he is hired to research the origins of a mysterious music sheet, he soon finds he’s not the only one at the manor; a dark presence keeps following him around. The more time he spends at the historic site, the clearer it becomes that something tragic happened here.

💀 it's time to find your wings again by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed

(T, 12k, magic) The first reports are dismissed, as tall tales or folklore. As mental illness, poor Bathilda, she’d gone loopy. As people simply getting scared in the dark woods and seeing things, making things up.

💀 Veni, Vidi, Amavi by @fallinglikethis

(E, 10k, ghost) Harry remembers why he stayed now, why he’s always had that feeling of waiting. He was holding out for Louis, his soulmate. He was keeping his promise.

💀 All The Songs That You Sing In The Dark by pukeandcry

(M, 10k, zombies) What happened was that first people got sick. What happened after that was that they died. But the worst thing was what happened after that. After they died, they came back.

💀 We'll Never Be Lonely in the Dark by QuickedWeen / @becomeawendybird

(E, 6k, psychic) Detective Louis Tomlinson keeps getting blocked when he tries to use his psychic gift to locate a missing child.

💀 Somethin' Old and Red by nonsensedarling / @absoloutenonsense

(NR, 5k, vampire) He’d pour a splash into a wine glass —his favourite little joke was telling humans he loved a nice glass of red every now and again— then sat down in his living room and listened to music while he drank.

💀 Then Came The Rain by whoknows

(M, 4k, magic) His vision swims, brain trying to focus, trying to stop seeing double. The rain might begin to wash the blood away, but there’ll be no cleansing of his soul.

💀 Rapture by @allwaswell16

(E, 3k, vampire) It was New Year's Eve in Victorian London, and a lonely vampire could no longer resist the stunning lamplighter he watched night after night.

💀 Needle by @nouies

(NR, 666 words, magic) “You didn’t deserve this,” he muttered between hiccups. “She didn’t have the right.”

💀 Foreshadowing by @neondiamond

(NR, 666 words, horror) Alone at home on a rainy Friday night, Harry reads a story that resembles his own life a bit too closely…

💀 head all full of stuffin' by Lhhome / @lhhomefics

(T, 666 words, scarecrow) “I don’t!” That’s what Louis had said on live television a little over a month ago when asked whether he thinks scarecrows are sentient creatures. He is severely regretting that right at this moment.

—Rare Pairs—

💀 come take my pulse by nicheinhischest

(M, 38k, Zayn/Niall) Zayn sighs and tells him tiredly, “Y'know, you say eerily cheerful things for someone who bashed a zombie’s face in with a golf club today."

💀 Love's First Bite by skipper / @skipperxao3

(E, 6k, Zayn/Louis) For Zayn, love was never a part of life’s equation, not when you’re considered a lowly vampire while working in the Vampire’s royalty club, Love’s First Bite.

#ficrec #trackinghappily #trackinghome #tracksintheam #1dsource #1dficvillage #hltracks #ficsfor4am

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mybluelonglegs · 11 months ago

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2d x reader mini story

(backstage y/n is a beginning singer)

i closed my eyes finished singing my lyrics and heard the crowd scream. i smiled in response

" Thank you so much guys!, ill be right back but with the time ill be gone a wonderful group called the.." i said looking at my hand which had the name of the band. " the GORILLAZ" i said yelling the bands name, i heard the crowd scream in response while i started walking off the stage until... "o-" i said closing my eyes feeling my body fall from the impact that hit me, i felt someone's arm wrap around my waist and said "oh im sorry love, i didn't see you their" he said laughing softly and nervously " you, okay?" i quickly opened my eyes "oh ya sorry, i wasn't looking where i was going"i said quickly getting up off of him" oh go,go your gonna miss your que" i said running backstage "bu-"i heard him say before i ran far enough backstage. ( what the fuck was that) i thought to myself, i shrugged it off and started getting ready for my next song after them which was about in 20 or so, so i had time to change into a new outfit " hmm what should i wear?" i said looking at my closet. "oh perfect" i said heading to the bathroom in my changing room i changed and walked infront of my body lengthen mirror

y/ns hair

y/ns shirt

y/ns pants

y/ns shoes

" okay i think this will fit the song good" i said shrugging and walking to my makeup desk and starting my makeup

" that was a weird interaction, never had that happen before" i said thinking about the situation while doing my makeup

" okay and done" i said smiling at my art work

y/ns makeup

jewelry

"okay i really went off with this look" i said looking into the mirror when my ear bud buzzed my managers voice coming from it

" okay y/n its time to get into place"

i pushed a button " you got it mom" i said jokingly

i heard my manager laugh in response " come on if we go at this speed you'll miss it"

"okay,okay im going mom" i said laughing and walking out my changing room

i slowly made it to the side of the stage watching the man that caught me from falling singing i looked at him confused and buzzed my earbud " hey who's the guy that singing?" i waited for her to answer

" thats the lead singing of the gorillaz" i heard her voice

" really? i thought the band would be older than that how old is he anyway?" i said buzzing my ear bud

"um let me think by the way hes acting and how he looks i would say maybe like 24 or 5 why?" my manager asked confused

" just curious i guess i mean the name just sounds like they would be older" i said crossing my arms and listening to the song he was singing

( he was singing 5/4) the girls were going crazy for him and he was eating it up winking and kissing their hands i rolled my eyes waiting for my turn

but when i was about to turn, i was someone in the corner of my eyes so i looked back and he was Infront of me.. he pulled the mic away listening to the tempo " sing with me" he said putting his hand out

i grabbed my mic and walked out with him the crowd went wild screaming our names i laughed in response. he continued to sing his bands song

" she turned my dad on~" he sang winking at me

i laughed in response and looked back at the crowd walking over to the other side of the stage and started humming to the tempo

"she turned my dad on~" i sang looking at him and started moving my body ( hips) to the beat

( i noticed a light tint of blush on his face while he sang making me laugh softly)

"dad on, dad on" a little girl sang playing the guitar

i turned and smiled

" she made me kill myself come on~" he sang as the song slowly ended looking at me

the crowed cheered us on and we walked to each other and bowed. i turned to him " your really good" i said smiling

"thx love you to" i said winking at me

" thanks so whos in your band we might have to chat" i said winking back

" well then we'll meet you after the show" he said winking and walking off the stage with his band

i looked at the crowd and waited for my song

~skipping my song hermit the frog~

"we broke our glass ballon let go of my glass ballon" i said singing the lasts of the lyrics and bowed

" thank you, thank you i hope you enjoyed the show tonight and have a wonderful lasting night" i smiled and blow a kiss at the crowd and walked backstage still hearing them clapping

i sighed going to my dressing room and started humming music and taking off my outfit and putting on a black crop top on with some flannel pjs. i sighed again laying down on the couch when was a knock at my door.

( hey guys if you would like a part two pls like or give me some ideas pls)

#2d x reader #2d gorillaz #gorillaz x reader #gorillaz 2d #stuart pot #murdoc niccals #gorillaz #noodle gorillaz #phase 1 gorillaz #fanfic gorillaz #y/n singer #2d x singer

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vanalex · 6 months ago

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I can't help it... I'm obsessed with him...

A little "history lesson" (for the ones interested) about how I became a fan of Type O Negative... and my feelings towards them...

When I heard 'my girlfriend's girlfriend ' for the first time in 1996 I was just a teen. Watching MTV in my bedroom. I was, at that time, very much into 60s music and aesthetic. A hippie après la lettre, sort of speak... I was also, for as long as I remember, obsessed with vampires and a huge fan of Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles.

So when this video came on I loved the colorful backdrop and sixties influences. And then there were 4 guys dressed in black, looking like vampires. Especially the singer. I lost it. This was my new favorite band. 🤗

When 'Love you to death' came out I ordered the T-shirt (a girl t-shirt, not the unisex shirts they sell now) via postorder catalogue Large. I loved that T-shirt and would still have it, if my mom didn't throw it out with all my other band shirts, because she thinks you need to keep the economy going by buying new stuff all the time and getting rid of "old" stuff. Insert *dramatic eyeroll*

Type O Negative were not a mainstream band and unfortunately, growing up in a small town, I was about the only one, as far as I know, that liked their music.

So, I completely missed out on their 1999 world coming down release. ☹️

In the early 2000s, a record store in the city where I went to college had a clearance sale. I found the least worst of CD and bought it. Around that same time I bought the After Dark DVD. It was only then that I found out about world coming down. I liked the "new" songs, but also had mixed feelings about them. They depicted an unhealthy lifestyle.

In 2003 'I don't wanna be me' was playing on MTV and I was excited to hear more new music from them and seeing them on MTV again. I remember also being shocked with Peter's appearance in that video. He did not look well... It would become clear he wasn't doing well at all: mental and physical health problems, addiction, jail time, forced rehab, relationship problems, etc...

Later that year Type O Negative came to a festival a few hours driving from where I lived... Unfortunately I had noone to go with and my boyfriend and I were volunteering for a local 'save the forest' non profit that same weekend. I thought I would see them next time, but the same circumstances made me not see them in 2007... 😥

And although Peter looked better (healthier) in the late 2000s, he aged a lot due to his addictions and lifestyle, he also looked kind of sad when he was performing on Wacken in 2007.

When he died in 2010 I initially had peace with it, thinking it was probably for the best.... knowing about his struggles and losses...

I did not know about the circumstances of his death until many years later and since then I've felt it could have been prevented. He did not OD, he did not commit suicide... he was clean for almost a year (!), he looked happy in his last interview 🥹... he died because he didn't receive the correct medical care on time... because he was taking care of his sick cat instead of himself, because the people nearby him didn't help (Did they not see/know how severely ill he was? I guess we'll never know)...

I've always felt like I missed out on something with not seeing Type O Negative live. From all the bands I've listened to as a teen until now, they're the only band that I love more with each time I listen to them. I don't have this kind of connection with other bands/artists... Seeing pictures, videos, ... of them makes me very nostalgic... it feels like they're still around. And then it hits me they're not 😥 I just miss this band a lot and wish we had more years with them, more music...

So... seeing old pictures of them, especially Peter in his more happier and healthier years (everything before world coming down era and even before 1997), makes me feel nostalgic ... "obsessed" ... and the pictures where he smiles are solid gold. 💚

I wonder... did he ever know how truly special he was ? Handsome, intelligent, goofy, creative, sensitive... I guess he didn't and let his value be determined by others. At least, that's how I interpret some of his lyrics... What do you think about this?

So, what's your story? Why do you love their music? I would love to find out!

This last picture is my absolute favorite 💚

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malleablemusic · 1 month ago

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unfortunately, my boyfriend unironically listens to weezer, and has caught wind about this blog. after a month of trying, he has successfully convinced me to use this album for this week's blog. let the record state that i have heard island in the sun before, as aquamarine is one of my favorite movies in the entire world (for anyone wondering, he will now be watching that fantastic piece of cinematic history with me in exchange for this post). anyways, here's my review of weezer's self titled album:

don't let go: 3/5 stars

i love when a man sings "ill be down on my knees" for some reason its just so vulnerable

loving the simp energy he is giving, whole song is just begging so far

this is transforming me into a 14 year old boy with a spiky haircut, learning guitar in my room, suddenly i want to play basketball in my driveway

his voice is very classic, especially for the music genre, but doesn't feel unique enough for me

photograph: 2.9/5 stars

i always love clapping in songs, especially in an intro

such a fun beat, i could dance around my room to this

i think he just liked getting to repeat "re-erect it" over and over

hash pipe: 4.6/5 stars

oh okay raaaangeee!!!! is this a completely different singer

feels like such a different vibe than the first two

what happens when that 14yr old spiky haired kid gets older and gains access to marijuana lmao

i didn't know weezer could be angsty this is great

"you've got your problems / i've got my eyes wide / you've got your big g's / i've got my hash pipe" he's truly speaking words of wisdom

island in the sun: 5/5 stars

it is very hard for me to separate this song from the film that means so very much to me (aquamarine) so i simply will not be

the pure joy and light and love this song exudes its insane

i am instantly transported to a beach, in a bikini and big shirt, hair damp and sun-bleached, off a margarita and dancing in the sunset

i am obsessed with the guitar solo and need to learn how to play just for this

the way he sings "we'll never feel bad anymoreeee" !! IM HEALED

crab: .1/5 stars

okay continuing with the beach theme

brb googling what it means to crab?

according to the internet they're just complaining about the women. ok way to let me down after one of my favorite songs ever

is this just a man upset a woman won't sleep with him

"crab at the booty / 'taint gonna do no good" shutttt uppp ! just shut up (:

this is really gonna lower the album's average huge L for them

knockdown dragout: 2.5/5 stars

lyrics are kind of giving nothing, repetitive

i do enjoy the guitar, they always eat with that, but this is kind of boring

smile: 2.8/5 stars

i like his little belting when he sings "'cause i don't wanna break"

the guitar solos in this album !! even the short ones, so good

follows the common theme i see of wanting a girl to give him a chance...

simple pages: 2.8/5 stars

yup okay another song asking a girl to give him a chance - truly, i get it, and this is a valid form of art you go sir, i just do not see myself listening to this kinda music

i do enjoy pining every once in a while do not get me wrong

another bangin guitar solo

feels like i don't have much to say about this..

glorious day: 3/5 stars

angsty nerdy boy decides its time to finally make a move and ask a girl out

i like these kinds of weezer songs more, the "grittier" sound

giving angry high school band in a battle of the bands competition

o girlfriend: 2/5 stars

i think what i don't like about them is while their sound is good and i enjoy it, the lyrics are truly so generic and not special

i think I said this in an earlier post, and i am not trying to be disparaging, but an AI chatbot could've easily written this in 30 seconds- i just don't believe he's actually hurt and grieving a love, i want to feel the artists genuine pain, this does not sound like a man torn apart

sadly, i was very underwhelmed by this album. to my partner's credit, this is not his favorite of their work, so maybe i will give the rest of their music a try eventually, but for now that was very mid (aside from the perfection that is island in the sun) and i'd give the album 2.7/5 stars.

#music #music review #weezer #spotify #Spotify

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fuckedprophet · 1 year ago

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🍍🍅🥭

🥭 : how important to my muse is their hometown, or where they’re from? are they proud of it, or considered a hometown hero? did they move away, or do they wish to?

He's from copperwood, tx. Its a small middle of no where rural town that sits off hwy 87 at the very bottom of tx. It aint got nothing more than four gas stations, two fast food chain joints, five churches, and maybe a max population of 5,501 residents. It aint much of nothing sitting on the very edge of a swamp and woods; and its where hell came to exist in the run down craftsman the mcmeen family rented thanks to the church. Dallas' hometown doesn't mean much to him, not really. There are about a handful or two of folks he'd think kindly of and the rest he'd watch drown if the tide rose too high. They turned a blind eye a lot of them did to what his father did to him; and the very night he killed his father a couple of them even accused him of staging the whole thing. They wanted him to be the monster, not their pastor they let chaperon their kids church camp bus rides.

He isn't considered a homeown hero, if anything he's considered an unfortunate soul that survived and now has to bear the burden of what his father did. He at least isn't alone -- his grandmother picked him up when he turned 16 and he moved his ass out of copperwood, tx and now lives in cold river, ma. Its better, not too many bible thumpers up there to demand he show respect to his dead beat shit father.

🍎 : how stable is my muse’s mental health? have they been diagnosed with any mental illnesses and / or conditions? do they have any undiagnosed mental illnesses and / or conditions? do they or should they attend therapy?

Not very. We'll be 110% honest here, he is not mentally stable or sound. He's been through too much and his doctors explained that to him when he was being watched. He'd come to them point blank and asked them what exactly they were looking for, and they'd explained to them after he delicately said ' i don't want bullshit answers. I don't want sugar coated. What are you looking for in me? ' they were trying to see if he showed symptoms like his father, if he bordered on possibly picking up where his dad left off. I mean after all this was a 15 year old boy who brutally bashed his father's (40) head in with a book end out of his sisters bed room. They were a tad concerned.

He was diagnosed with ptsd, depression, anxiety, and a few other things depersonalization disorder as well as dissociative amnesia. The amnesia cleared up after a couple of weeks, but he was still being watched for it there after in case something triggered him. He had several therapist from the age of 16-18 before one finally stuck. Eleven years he's been seeing the same man and regards him highly, they are in each others emergency contacts believe it or not. He takes therapy rather seriously and because of it he has gotten better with expressing his emotions, it was his therapist that encouraged him to write songs and follow his dream of being a guitarist.

🍍 : how comfortable is my muse in their body? how do they feel about their height, weight, strength, and body type? how important is being attractive to them?

Now? very. Before dallas struggled a lot with self image, especially after he healed and saw his scars. He went through his teen years thinking he was rather ugly due to the damage his father had done to him. It was a struggle a lot growing up and he got to the point where he didn't want to be shirtless, he didn't wear short sleeves or anything that showed his arms. He was skinnier back then, lanky and tall and while he is genetically dispositioned to be muscular and larger with his mental issues he wasn't taking the best care of himself.

Now as an adult he is very confident in how he looks, he has worked endlessly to cultivate the appearance he wants and has succeeded. He has tattoos all over covering his scars so they are visible and he feels more himself wearing short sleeves and sleeveless shirts. While he hates lifting he does put it into a regimen to do so just so he is able to use his upper body strength. He runs and walks a lot, he swims a lot too now -- focusing on things that put him at a higher level of endurance rather than brute strength. ( not to mention that when he does get tapped into his corrupt blood and nephilim blood he does inherit a extreme amount of strength )

He is grateful to his height, he enjoys being tall -- he cant imagine not being able to see over peoples heads and the thought makes him anxious and just he doesn't like the idea. His weight doesn't bother him, when his hit around twenty two and started taking care of himself he bulked up and gained weight. He looked at it as the heavier you are the harder it is to get you off your feet or knock you over, he was right. Now he is very content with his body type; he doesn't dislike how he's shaped or how anything on him looks. He is even proud of how he looks now.

Not obsessed. Lets put it that way, he knows how to dress now, he knows how to appear to others -- he's gotten very good at dressing himself according to who he is surrounded by. He isn't the most stylish but he isn't hopeless and while he doesn't always fix his hair; he knows being attractive will get you farther. He has learned people help pretty people and if he can be pretty; he tries his best.

#. asks #. headcanon #. study

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riverdamien · 3 months ago

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Life Is An Allusion!

"Life Is A Grand Allusion!"

(Elijah's Trauma!"

1 Kings 19:4-8

New Living Translation

4 Then he went on alone into the wilderness, traveling all day. He sat down under a solitary broom tree and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors who have already died.”

5 Then he lay down and slept under the broom tree. But as he was sleeping, an angel touched him and told him, “Get up and eat!” 6 He looked around and there beside his head was some bread baked on hot stones and a jar of water! So he ate and drank and lay down again.

7 Then the angel of the Lord came again and touched him and said, “Get up and eat some more, or the journey ahead will be too much for you.”

8 So he got up and ate and drank, and the food gave him enough strength to travel forty days and forty nights to Mount Sinai,[a] the mountain of God.

--------------------

Elijah is one of my heroes. He admits radically when he is traumatized by the violence of the regime he has fled; it has crippled his ability to care for himself and God responds to Elijah's very precarious situation, by performing an extraordinary act of solidarity, not in the prophet's violent rampage but in his moment of vulnerability.

In the same way these past weeks I have been pushed into my most vulnerable moments, moments of deep fear, rage, and anger; Over twenty years ago I was stabbed in the bottom of my skull and a piece of the instrument broke off, where it has remained simply being there. In my bi-annual examination in L.A., the Doctor discovered that it is now slowly moving, inoperable, and will in all likelihood kill me in the next three years. The song The Grand Allusion by Styx rings in my head:

“Welcome to the Grand illusion Come on in and see what's happening Pay the price, get your tickets for the show The stage is set, the band starts playing Suddenly your heart is pounding Wishing secretly you were a star But don't be fooled by the radio The TV or the magazines They show you photographs of how your life should be But they're just someone else's fantasy So if you think your life is completely confusing because you never win the game Just remember that it's a Grand illusion 'Cause deep inside we're all the same We're all the same... So if you think your life is completely confusing because your neighbors got it made Just remember that it's a Grand illusion And deep inside we're all the same America spells competition Join us in our blind ambition Get yourself a brand new motor car Someday soon we'll stop to ponder What on Earth's this spell we're under We made the grade and still we wonder Who the hell we are?” Styx

Like "Jessie" who long ago drew the painting, amid the depression, that led to his suicide, over his plight over being gay I have and am questioning everything I am, and whether or not I have failed. All I have tried to do is be a pastor, listening, caring, and supporting. Is all this simply a "grand allusion!"

Last night I encountered a fifty-year-old man, eating out of a garbage can, and I said, "Hey come here and I will buy you some food. He had not eaten in two days, was obviously on drugs, and was mentally ill, feeling threatened by everyone. I bought him a couple of pizza slices and listened to him. I wonder a lot if I have failed, after all, I mostly listen to people, I do not feed hundreds a day, I do not scream at the government, I sit, with a sign once a week, and if someone wants to talk, we talk, hopefully planting a seed of change. I am simply doing "Little by Little!" I believe that gentleman is the "broken body of Christ", and I fed Jesus! Is that a grand allusion?

"Life is a Grand Allusion!" Society has surrounded us by ways of finding meaning, and religious traditions that ultimately are destructive when taken to the extreme, and all I see is people suffering on the street and dying.

I have spent the past three weeks in the desert alone, with just me and my Bible, reflecting on maybe I should end it now- I am a failure, and no one gives a da. . mn! "Take my life, Lord, for I am no better than my ancestors. ."

Amid my fears and depression, a poem that has meant so much to me for years rang into my head:

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” ― Rainer Maria Rilke

And the words of the Angel came to me: "Get up and eat some more, or the journey ahead will be to much for you.!(19:7). I will get up and continue my journey in ministry!

And so I am moving back into life and will seek to "Live the question now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it live along some distant day into the future!"

And in living the question I will "Live to the point of folly and in the words of

Kawaga: “Being a freelance tramp, a

Vagabond for Christ. I must go until

Christ’s work is done. I go like the wind!” Deo Gratias! Thanks be to God!

Put me in jail, then. Throw me behind your religious bars since you have dubbed me a breaker of your law. I live my days in the courtroom of your criticism. I move unbothered under the gaze of your gavel. I have no interest in defending myself before your bench. Go on, clench your fists, raise your voice to make your point. Type the rebuke that you must make on my page. Who asked you to come through anyway? Is this rage your duty? We operate under a different set of obligations and get worked up to frustration for different reasons, even though we both claim fidelity to God. If you were interested, which I doubt, here is where my passion lies: feed the hungry, clothe the naked, heal the sick, defend the rights of the orphan, plead the widow’s cause, and woe to you who unjustly enforce God’s Law. Why spend your energy policing me when that same energy could be used to love, fiercely? Justice, mercy, and humility. Go learn what this means. Drew Jackson Deo Gratias! Thanks be to God!

======================

30th Anniversary Celebration

Victor’s Pizza

6 p.m.

November 9, 2024

WE ARE BEGGARS! WE REALLY NEED MONEY--Really Badly At the moment!

FOR FOOD, SOCKS, HARM REDUCTION AND OTHER SERVICES!

P.O. Box 642656

415-305-2124

[email protected]

pay pal

www.temenos.org

(Temenos and Dr. River seek to remain accessible to everyone. We do not endorse particular causes, political parties, or candidates, or take part in public controversies, whether religious, political or social--Our pastoral ministry is to everyone!

Temenos Catholic Worker

P.O. Box 642656

San Francisco, CA 94164

Dr. River Sims, sfw

#homeless #spirituality #povertyy #youth #homelessness #lgbtq;

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noellehooves · 5 months ago

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in honour of my first post ever, im gonna be talking about something that ive been brewing over for a while.

so, the pop genre in 2014-16 has been on my mind. the super upbeat style and (mostly) encouraging lyrics have always had a warm place in my heart. im talking Avicii, Maroon 5, American Authors, that sort of sound. i lived through a major part of my life listening to these bands on the radio, having moved multiple times throughout the ages 5-14 and spending most of my time in the car. i didn't have a phone until 13, so to pass the time i liked to listen to music.

my step mother and my father were always more of a metal and rock type, which i also enjoyed, but i never really thought it was my favourite genre. they never got me hyped like the pop sings back then. i guess nowadays it more sounds like commercial music, like songs you'd hear in an Old Navy ad talking about a shoe sale, but that's besides the point. anyways, what im getting at is that i grew up listening to those types of songs. im sure most people did, but it had a big part in developing my music taste now.

i still listen to those bands, and, (call me emotional), it even makes my eyes water sometimes as i think about my younger self listening to them and being so effortlessly happy. nostalgia definitely helps with that, but that's not the only thing that the genre makes me think of.

i guess it's the sort of idea that the music gives me about the future, weirdly enough. the idea of like, 'yeah, today is great and we should party, but tomorrow is gonna be even better!' is what i think of when i listen to it. the future where everyone is happy and we all have fun that i always imagined as a kid but the future i never got. i always wanted to be in the suburbs, hanging out with friends after school and riding our bikes to the gas station, the idea of belonging somewhere. the idea of listening to OneRepublic as i sit on the curb outside of the school and eating a sandwich with my friend. it's sort of a silly dream, seeing as how it's so... mediocre? it's not grandiose like most dreams are, but that's why it hurts even more to think i never got the chance to experience it, sort of.

my parents hated the idea of living in the city. my dad came from Tennessee and my mother from Colorado, so they much rather preferred to stay by themselves in the woods or in farmland. and while im not saying a cabin in the woods doesn't sound nice, it's the isolation that i hate. im not built for that life, i prefer a noiser place where things are always moving rather than dead quiet. it leaves me alone with my thoughts and obviously, as shown by this ramble, that's not particularly a good thing. i never got to experience the suburbian life, and that sucks.

back on topic. the idea that the genre promises a sort of better future is an idea that ill die by. it oddly almost resembles Fruitiger Aero, in nature. the pictures of computers with fish and dolphins and rainbows flowing out of it, the idea that technology could coexist with nature and that we would run on largely solar panels and keep the earth clean. it was made to introduce technology in a way that wouldn't startle people by promising it wasn't going to do harm, almost. that whole idea that 'hey, this is new, but it's an improvement! we're going to have a better tomorrow' is similar to the pop genre in 2014-16 to me. promising a better future that never happened, and that's why it's so enjoyable to listen to that music. the sound of happiness and pure excitement about the future is something we can't get anymore. the world is going to shit and we'll never have that sound again.

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albumwalloffame · 11 months ago

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Top 10 Worst Album Covers of 2023 - Part 2/2

Part 1

#5. Lordi - Screem Writers Guild

You know, one of the key differences between drawing for illustration and for animation, is that animation does not require a whole lot of detail, especially on characters because that is just more stuff that has to move and more time spent on superfluous details. Illustration allows you get more detailed… but this may just be too detailed.

Also, I get the pun, but it still bothers me "Screem" is misspelled.

#4. Various Artists - A Very Metal Christmas

I'm sorry, but you cannot make Christmas a "badass" holiday.

#3. Dungeon Wolf - The White Elf

The sad thing is… the last time Dungeon Wolf had an album cover on this list, was an improvement. It was disgusting as Hell, but it was at least competently put together, I mean… do I even need to explain why this is awful? It should be pretty obvious right? Then again I thought it would be pretty obvious to not take influence for your album cover from Adema's "Topple the Giants" and Louis Prima's "The Call of the Wildest". It's got a frame and everything too, it's like the most basic ass photoshop job ever, I could have done this when I was learning to use Photoshop in High School. The worst thing is, I'm pretty sure it's intentional, I'm fairly certain that the guys behind Dungeon Wolf just want attention and will try to get it in anyway that doesn't involve putting in any actual effort. Congrats, you got your consolation prize, your participation trophy, bronze medal, you reached third place again, even your practically offensive album cover wasn't bad enough to be number one, but to be number one means you would actually have to try, put genuine effort into what you do.

I doubt this is the last we'll see of Dungeon Wolf, but we can hope, right?

#2. Willie Nelson - Bluegrass

I know it is… wrong to speak ill of our patron saint of country and folk music Willie Nelson, but my autistic ass just wants him to back the Hell up. I can get the blue tinting, the weird effect on the edge, I can buy all that, I can vibe with that, but I don't want an old man getting so close in my face I can hear him breathing, frankly I don't really want anyone that close to my face without my consent. Willie, please, back up!

#1. Parannoul - After the Magic

There is thought that goes into ranking these lists. I really do have to think about what the intent behind the album cover is, if it's funny bad or just normal bad, sometimes I even have to ask if I actually hate the image or if I'm just attaching something around the album to the actual album artwork. However, something I do have to think about is, "Can I really argue that this is the 'worst' album cover", like I have to justify this to myself before I justify it to you. I mention all of this because, as soon as I laid eyes on this album cover, this bright ass photo with a television static filter placed over it, this eye-burning eye-sore of an album cover, I knew this immediately had to have the number one spot. There are more boring album covers, album covers that are lazier, more offensive, uglier, grosser, sillier, album covers that actually make me uncomfortable to look at, but this album cover is just the least good. There it is, worst album cover of the year.

Honourable Mentions:

Melanie Martinez - Portals; You know, I think even Marilyn Manson was done with this schtick at one point.

Roger Waters - The Dark Side of the Moon Redux; Obviously, the best way to improve one of the greatest album covers of all time is to shrink it down and put in something's eye, clearly.

Sufjan Stevens - Javelin; This would have been on the list if I wanted to have a three-way tie on the list.

Flume - Arrived Anxious, Left Bored; This album cover is a mood and I hate it.

Tim Hecker - No Highs; It was between this and the Foo Fighters cover.

U2 - Songs of Surrender; Come on guys... You're better than this.

Veil of Light - Sundancing; Okay, honestly, I hate pastels. Not enough of a reason to put it on the list proper, but I hate pastels.

Fairly Odd Bops; This was on the list before I remembered that Dungeon Wolf did a thing.

Everything But The Girl - Fuse; I'm sorry, F U S and E do not make shadows that look remotely like E B T or G.

Haken - Fauna; I'll admit, I kinda like this one, but it's so silly. It's the kind of bad that loops around and becomes good.

#music #art #album art #album covers #bad album covers #top 10 list #rock and roll #pop music #Album Covers Wall (Hall) of Fame

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kmr95 · 1 year ago

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well up until last month some time in late mid july I was prepared for every body knowing simply real eabos home life. can't top it. recess smh and before july I was frustrated to say the least as ya see down below in the digitized text. everything's always been old school can't top it. seriously & simple life fact from 2022 real human not fake or evil . well before thanks for nothing a lot of you real humans and of course fake evil humans damn y'all all to hell controversial aside can't bring memories etc"after life " scary etc real humans all us mostly on earth real eabos home life society I'm prepared simply. approaching. I like that I'm a virgin forever no asodomy no kissing any humans mouth no born again bs hah not ralph real fan friendly usually bletchley park ww2 some devoted trolls of analog silicon that are fe"male" human garbage fake evil for real down there pun no & no intentions seriously damn general but seriously again stereotypes any real human or minorities any type of person of color or asian. so distinguish physical discipline verbal or abuse like abuse song musician not always the case with mental illness health etc it's difficult for everybody to process the purpose of eabos life mostly bad for ya. not special to stop good or bad free will. . my not too hangry bestiality mouth sort of hah breath but seriously. analog silicon smell through hah he he he he

yet again it was a ghost town barely any digitized views almost a no show pretty much. digitized train wreck. real eabos home life mottos slogans in the corrupt system.

well it's safe to say I'm done and we'll pyrogen a good weird digitized name like analog can again of course from bodybuilding misc digitized forums or any real human who cares what I say about eabos in analog real life or digitized I am done fighting fire with fire since still many humans dismiss don't get what I'm saying or dint care to share eabos so again simply of course you are not special to stop good or bad free will do exactly so I will ignore not read or see or listen to your whatever analog or digitized I don't like digitized anyway of course again so good riddance and this is scary sad or idiotic again

#chatgpt #military #ymca #tech #modern warfare ii #algorithm #life

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broken-balance-baby · 3 years ago

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a meta post for an AU playlist

this post goes out to @swearingcactus for managing to read all of forgotten idols and their intertwined destinies while simultaneously screaming at me. last night was a blast homie, now i've been plunged back into au brainrot, enough to deduce that i still love this playlist. Please, enjoy it as you play it, kids, there's a lot to delve in with my mental illness being projected onto this story. This post contains spoilers from the fic, though if you're planning on reading that fic I assume you can wait until you finish to finally understand the context I'm explaining behind this.

So without further ado, here we go!

The Setlist(TM):

Karma - Sarah Kinsley

Hard Feelings/Loveless - Lorde

American Money - BORNS

Reset Me, I Was Just A Kid - Nothing But Thieves

Teenage Fantasy - Jorja Smith

Cure, Gold - Felix Rabito & Saint Dismas

From The Gallows - I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

Body High - Mystery Skulls

Sideways, Primavera - Santana

Misery - Maroon 5

Still Don't Know My Name - Labrinth

It Will Come Back, Arsonist's Lullaby - Hozier

Sex n' Drugs, Somebody to Love - Abhi The Nomad

Swoon - Beach Weather

Poplar St. - Glass Animals

Jesus lived in a motel room - HYUKOH

Old Soul - Saint Motel

Enchanted, My Prayer - The Platters

Fly Me To The Moon - Bobby Womack

Excuses - Shakey Graves

Superposition - Young the Giant

Cuz I Love You - Lizzo

1. On Heartbreak/Betrayal and Trust Issues

Tell me, fortune teller Will I let another broken heart in?

I think this one holds up an obvious choice of words. We'll be going back to this later on in the essay, but I'd like to preface these lyrics as a way of understanding what being broken, surrounded by broken people does. Bhadra fears that the next person in her life will be broken; crooked, all wrong, someone who would fuck her up in the worst ways possible, as well as also unable to let herself relive the kind of heartbreak she went through as a child. This goes the same for Diego; after the events of part 2 it began to become unbearable to just let himself be. Will he let himself get his heart broken again? Will he let his fears get to him? Who knows.

'Cause I remember the rush when forever was us Before all of the winds of regret and mistrust Now we sit in your car and our love is a ghost Well, I guess I should go, yeah, I guess I should go

This song was honestly too good not to put into this playlist. Aside from the fact this will come back in multiple points later on, this verse specifically highlights the calm before the storm, the multitude of "it's over, this is the past, and I have to move on," details upon details that paint how much the love was still there even if it was going to be gone forever. The death of a loved one will never truly leave when their things still remain, after all. This is Bhadra's acceptance of never getting the time she had hope for Ajay to the fullest extent, for him to be the man that would save her and her country, so she decides, yes: she has to go. She has to move on. At least by the final chapter/epilogue, she finally says a proper goodbye to him and the life that she'd known for the past 32 years of her life.

Yeah, I don't wanna live like this Where were you when we needed you the most? I know exactly what you think So I'll push 'till I see you no more

Diego is tired. He's sick of psychosis, he's sick of the repetition that his life gave him. Where the most important figures of his life were were long dead and gone, he still sees them as hallucinations and delusions, people he thought he was allowed to need were simply there to haunt him. So what does he do? He works it out, unable to take medications at first, goes about his life as El Presidente like it's normal. But then, as Eric and Gary rolled into Yara, he realized something: he wanted to break this cycle. He wanted to break this repetition, this mundanity like he did before, even if his demons sat on his shoulders while doing it. He needed them, lost them, and they came back to haunt him until he couldn't take it anymore.

Words drip like honey dear how sweet it is to hear But not everything that you are presented is as it appears So he tells you love you now?

Oh, you think he's looking lovingly at you But it's nowhere near the truth

Another one for Bhadra's distorted affections for Ajay, but it comes with the price of having to deal with a man blind to his own volition. Bhadra's perception of Ajay prior to his betrayal is a warped one, idolizing and pressuring him to be something that he couldn't possibly achieve as a man on his own. She loved him, Ajay loved her too, but he also ripped her apart and never put her together again.

She asked him, a man she loved, a man who had given her hope, a man who belonged, if he could save her.

In her heart, he says yes.

In his lips, there was silence.

Now time to go back Ocean of tears Before the sailing gonna turn back Now it's the time to go back My tongue can make or break Before I slip and realize

There's something about the anxiety this entire song brings. Broken in thoughts, you only ever get Hyukoh's lyrics in this form, a strange poem that gives off the same thoughts-only lyricism from e.e. cummings. It's something that happens when you think fast, when everything goes out of hand, suddenly everything feels far removed from one another and you're just feeling all sorts of emotions. It's what Bhadra feels and thinks every time, she's a fast thinker, but she isn't coherent when you put her out there in the world if you want her to speak what she thinks. This comes from the fact that this is just a constant thing in her life. So what does she do, if her tongue "breaks"?

'Cause I don't have time to fall in love I don't have time to fall in love No no no, not today Maybe tomorrow is too far away Can I change before my time runs out?

The fear of having to love in both part 1 and 2 are pretty evident, but both Diego and Bhadra can't help surrender to the feeling no matter how much it actually gave them the risk. They don't have the time to fall in love, but as the song goes, they can't wait to either. I think it also complies with the idea that they just won't have it different when they die, you know? So they beg for something different. Something to find love with. In turn, it changes them.

2. Sex and Taste, Who Knew That Was Love's Base?

Sex n' Drugs - Abhi the Nomad | Poplar St. - Glass Animals | It Will Come Back - Hozier | Swoon - Beach Weather | Body High - Mystery Skulls

Born faceless Please save me My soul's tainted It's how I've been born

With the song discussing about how the persona craves sex and drugs (as per the title) I thought it'd be appropriate to center this around Diego's adult life and how sex had become one of his many unhealthy coping mechanisms as he grew older. See, he doesn't use sex as a way to get his feelings of repression out, he uses it as a way of escaping from the things in his head as a substitute for drugs. Dissociating as you have sex just isn't a pleasant experience and chapter 1 of part 2 reflects that in this excerpt. He knows that something is wrong with him, but he just thinks that this is what he has to live with now.

His head may have been on his shoulders, but the further he went, the more his body had disconnected from the frame of reality. It was as if he was looking at a picture of himself, watching a moaning woman getting thrusted into a dinner table, something that should’ve been so thrilling but ended up with something too empty. Far too empty.

I feel like a new man Red flowers in my bed Breathe straight through the crisp air Dead flowers in the sand

If I were to put this in another manner, I would say that Diego coming into the gripes of sex as he gets older makes him into a new man. Petals fall in an image that falls fleeting, he sleeps, in love with sex, but it all dies with him even as he grows to love the woman he sleeps with.

Don't let it in with no intention to keep it Jesus Christ, don't be kind to it Honey, don't feed it, it will come back

Well, to put it into more words, it's within Diego's lust. He's happy Bhadra returns the sentiment, but it becomes more apparent that the more they play around, teasing each other in the middle of the war, the harder it is to try killing each other if they actually want each other. Still, when you have a big beefy guy who has rage as hot as the elephant's foot of Chernobyl lusting after you, chances are he might have to know how fucking dangerous (and exciting) it is.

You're my cannibal lover I feel it when you're underneath the skin Creepin' in again Well I know this chemical feeling Is making me forget about the drugs You poison with your love

It's pretty straight forward. Love can eat Diego alive, and he knows this when he's literally been poisoned and drugged, lmao. But anyway, it's an addicting thing to him altogether. Falling in love and getting to be involved is scary though, but love was also the reason he ended up having Bhadra in his life. Some things were meant to be no matter how cruel the circumstances were. The fate was intertwined, lmao.

I try to make my baby understand Move my hands like an analog Make you forget 'bout every other man Tell you stories with my body love

If you guys didn't already know, I have a thing for hands. Hands tell stories: they're the catalysts of creation, after all. Diego's hands are damaged from having to deal with the amount of death they inflicted upon people; his hands are wrapped to protect him from breaking his wrists when he punches people, and also so that the blood stains the fabric of the wraps, not his knuckles. So using his hands on Bhadra, he touches her as gently as he did with Isabel, but then takes a swing like he did with Carlos and ends up showing his history of violence with her like Mateo. It's enough for Bhadra to forget about Ajay for a moment, to make sure that he's the enemy she needs to take out, and she knows what kind of man Diego really is with how he uses his body against her.

“That’s my question.” She hissed. In the light of the day, he noticed how her eyes were colored brightly. They shone almost like gold, but upon closer inspection it seemed to have become green.

He tightened his hold on her head.

“You will answer me. You will tell me who you are working with. You will tell me,” Diego said, running his hand down her hair before pulling it up, making her wince as he spoke. “What. I. Need.”

“Or what?” she replied in a harsh whisper. The grip on her head tightened and she was met with a punch to the face.

[...] As Ajay let go of her head, Diego carded his fingers through her hair again and pulled it back, exposing her face. “Aren’t you lucky that your papa doesn’t want to hurt you?”

3. Superstitious Associations and Other Fantasies

Still Don't Know My Name - Labrinth | Superposition - Young the Giant | My Prayer - The Platters

I'm dreamin' of all of the possibilities I'm kissing all over your body, my Nefertiti And every time I think the planets aligning You're still so close, but yet so far

Aside from this song being one of those "songs to put a music video into" for this AU, but this verse blatantly opens up something for Diego and Bhadra. I think it's important to distinguish that this song is about not being able to have the love you've given, considering how Bhadra loved Ajay in a way that made her forget what he was, while Ajay loved Bhadra in a way that made him forget who he was. This also goes out for Diego, whose love has been betrayed many times in the process: losing his father thanks to his own fear, and losing someone he wanted so badly to love but ended up killing off because he couldn't drown in his paranoia and be correct about it in the process. Nefertiti is an Egyptian queen, her name meaning, "A Beautiful Woman Has Come", and the fact that Bhadra is brought up as beautiful when Diego first tries to strangle her is what provides evidence for his first instance of attraction to her. We're also bringing this song back in the next point.

It occurred to him that Bhadra was beautiful; it would be a shame to kill someone like her.

But he would do it again.

I don't believe in fate No psychic vision But when things fall into place, superposition In any universe you are my dark star

I want you to want me Why don't we rely on chemistry? Why don't we collide the spaces that divide us? I want you to want me

Basically:

I'll just leave this section from chapter 25.

“Do you believe in fate, Diego?”

Diego blinked. “Why?”

“I just think,” Bhadra said, “maybe there was a reason for us to meet.”

Diego could feel himself smile. He didn’t know why. “To kill each other, maybe.”

“But there’s always more, isn’t there?” Bhadra asked. “We were kids when everything went wrong.”

“And a revolution came upon us.” Diego finished for her. “I think I understand what you mean. What, you think it was destiny?”

“I’m not religious, but there are some things that…” Bhadra trailed off. She let out a laugh, as if disbelieving her own theory. “I don’t know. I could be wrong.”

“Maybe there is a reason,” Diego said, “especially when one of us hasn’t died yet.”

“What do you think it is?” Bhadra asked. He pictured her green eyes on him, shining against the moonlight.

“I don’t know.” Diego admitted, hair draping over his tired face. He wonders if she thinks of him too. He heard a snicker.

“Okay. I don’t know either.”

My prayer is to linger with you At the end of the day in a dream that's divine My prayer is a rapture in blue With the world far away and your lips close to mine

Prayers are always such meaningful actions of worship towards your deities; but to wish and hope for someone to be with you is a pretty big request from the universe. Obviously, both Bhadra and Diego aren't religious people, but they show a curiosity towards it, towards their coincidental situations. As per the excerpt above, it's a simple wish to be close to each other despite everything that's happened to them both. In the end, they could make their own world together.

In each other’s arms, they moved on to a future together.

4. Parallelism is Never Individual

Misery - Maroon 5 | Gold - Felix Rabito & Saint Dismas | Reset Me - Nothing But Thieves | Loveless - Lorde | Still Don't Know My Name - Labrinth

I am in misery There ain't nobody Who can comfort me, oh-yeah Why won't you answer me? The silence is slowly killing me, oh-yeah

Listen, I know we like to meme a lot on this song thanks to the fucking CPR remix, but listen. I added this song in before it got ruined. As much as this both represents Bhadra and Diego together, I like to lean a little further into Diego's side of the story since he's burdened with having killed people he's cared about for a really long time. It's hard to comfort someone like that when he knew what he was doing. He's trying to pray for something good, something different in that universe of repetition and silence, so he works on it rather than boil in his misery. Unlike Ajay, who carries a thing for being unable to do anything about his pain but take it out on the others around him, but they're both in parallel to that need of calling for Bhadra to pick up the fucking radio, to let her presence be known in their life, to let them know she's okay. It's very evident that Ajay just has nobody to help him in this time, not even Noore.

Of course I swore that next time i’d be better but it was all over before it began, cause i am dying to feel so important that now I can't even become my own friend

I think we can all agree that Ajay's canon motivation for bringing Ishwari to Lakshmana was that he also wanted to do the only good thing he would ever do in his life for her, trying to do right by her one last time as an apology for the lifetime of hell he gave her when she was still alive. Similarly, Diego is trying to do right by his country, to feel important, but in that range both characters end up losing themselves, unable to know remember who they are, but unlike Diego, Ajay suffered the consequence of it.

'Cause what if you reset me? What if we restart? What if you reset me? Before it falls apart

Pretty self explanatory, but I'll expound anyway. You know what I'm happy about? Ros pretty much brought up the parallels drawn between Bhadra and Ajay throughout the story of forgotten idols. The fact Adhrit represents as both Amita and Sabal (honestly gender goals though), Divin represents the innocence of Bhadra, but then you break the cycle as it actually does fall apart. Life is getting better even though sometimes you'll do the same things that ruined your life in the first place.

Bet you wanna rip my heart out Bet you wanna skip my calls now Well, guess what? I'd like that 'Cause I'm gonna mess your life up Gonna wanna tape my mouth shut

For Bhadra? She's blatantly threatening Ajay with this. Isabel falls into this category, even if she means it unintentionally to fuck Diego over. Pain. Smiling through it all.

Still don't know my name You still don't know my name And I would die your slave

Ugh, we're back on this song again and I've played it far too many times to count today. This part makes me think of scenes past Bhadra and Diego, really. This one goes out to the trials and tribulations on Bhadra's end, losing Ajay in the process while Noore echoes this. See, I have plans for Noore and Ajay's relationship which will later come to be revealed in part 4 and part 5, but this one pretty much parallels Noore losing Ajay to his insanity. They're losing him, doc.

She wanted for him to be part of that life. She wanted to be together with him for as long as they could have, instead of spending years upon years trying to reach and get closer to him without the burden of Pagan in the way.

5. Childhood Trauma

I Was Just A Kid - Nothing But Thieves | Arsonist's Lullaby - Hozier | Old Soul - Saint Motel

I was just a kid I needed answers I found a screen Promised adventure Just as I thought I had it all I pulled the trigger And nothing happened

You know how the reality of being a child in comparison to the fairy tales of stories always managed to make it suck? Yeah, make it the state of childish innocence, in a state of war and suddenly BOOM, the reality of war sets in! The reality of like, the promises of escape are suddenly slipping through your fingers greatly. I like to believe this revolves around Bhadra, but if we're being honest this also has a lot to do with Diego too. They both thought things were going to change if they had their finger on the trigger.

It didn't.

All you have is your fire And the place you need to reach Don't you ever tame your demons But always keep 'em on a leash

The boiling point. The culmination of matter. The repression, the anger, and the agony of being alive, it all culminates into one being and it's a taste for violence that gets both Diego and Bhadra riled the hell up. They use it as a weapon after years of having to suffer, and you know what? Good for them, good for them.

'Cause the more I get to know you Well, the more I feel I knew you In a lifetime a long time ago

Relatively self-explanatory, but I feel like this scene would suffice.

“I just… I wish that I met someone who wasn’t trying to ruin my life. I’m tired.”

Diego squeezed his fist.

“You will meet them one day.” Diego tried.

Then, Bhadra laughed. “Do you tell yourself that, Diego?”

“I gave up, but you have hope.”

6. It Hurts To Love

From The Gallows - I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME | Somebody to Love - Abhi The Nomad | Cuz I Love You - Lizzo

You're beautiful And evil too Sinister and vile For you, I'd die Or kill myself Whichever makes you smile

Vibes, man, vibes. It's the cynicism of this song that has me thinking; love is a hard and complicated thing for both Diego and Bhadra, they fear the things that might get them killed but would do it for love (or do it because it's love) in this primarily fucked up way because that was how they were taught to love.

I need something that'll get you out my eyes Take off my jacket and my tie I need something that'll get you off my mind Somebody to love me

Their lives have been intertwined in a way that provides this like, repetition of doing the same shit over and over again. It's time to break that cycle especially when you have no one to love you over it.

7. Yearning For A New Life

Fly Me To The Moon - Bobby Womack | American Money - BORNS | Primavera - Santana | Enchanted - The Platters

Oh, I wanna see what spring is like On Jupiter, on Jupiter and Mars In other words, hold my hand In other words, darlin', I love you, oh

Bhadra snorted, moving to punch him in the shoulder. “You’re annoying .”

Diego laughed, then winked at her. “You love it.”

“I don’t,” Bhadra said, looking away. Diego tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and cupped her cheek. Then, as Bhadra pursed her lips, she kissed his palm and held the hand close to her.

“I see.” Diego remarked.

He leaned away as Bhadra took a swing at him. Then, he threw an uppercut that she shoved away, kneeing him in the stomach.

As he fell down on one knee, he looked up to find a hand grabbing him by the necktie. Bhadra stood above him, so tall, and so beautiful. He yanked her by the wrist as he hopped upwards, pulling her close as their lips pushed against each other.

The kiss was long, inexperienced on Bhadra’s end— something that made the blood rush through Diego’s veins as he pressed his tongue against her mouth and was allowed to slip in for a moment before they had to pull away.

So take me to the paradise It's in your eyes Green like american money

If you noticed Isabel and Bhadra's appearances, you'd probably realize that they bare a resemblance to each other, especially in the eyes. Diego has a thing for brown girls with green eyes, that and the fact the shade of those eyes happen to shift whenever Diego focuses on her. But who's her? Gradually, the chapters where Diego looks Bhadra in the eyes changes from being reminded of Isabel to being reminded of who exactly Bhadra is, and it's an intense one.

Green eyes, dark skin, but a certain stubbornness to that woman named Bhadra made something itch under his skin and he didn’t like it.

[...]

In reaching out to take her by the neck, though, something happened. He saw curly hair, tan skin covered in freckles. He heard a sweet voice overlapping with Bhadra’s, and soft, gentle hands touching onto his callous palms.

[...]

But there was always more, wasn’t it? Something about those green eyes, the color of her skin, there were darker colors in another woman who had a fire lit in them.

Como la semilla Lleva nueva vida Hay en esta primavera una nueva era En el aire de este nuevo universo Hoy se respira libertad En primavera ya

As the seed brings new life there's in this spring, a new era. In the air of this new universe today there is freedom in spring already

Another case of self-explanatory lyrics, but I think the part that gets to me is the concept of a new world that Diego and Bhadra step into together once the story comes to a close. This song is real fun.

Living is a dream when you make it seem enchanted Lovers take for granted all the world's aglow, they ought to know When you touch a star then you really are enchanted Find a seed and plant it, love will make it grow

I remember during a depressive episode, I played this song so many times I was drowned out by my own cries as the song just kept going and going and going. I think I just find it to be a good, dissonant song, but it's also a world that Diego and Bhadra find themselves in, being that they're both people who've gone through constant episodes, living became a nightmare until they found someone they could build a paradise with. And yet, within the events of part 1 and part 2, you find that they've lost it prior to the events of part 3.

8. Identity

Teenage Fantasy - Jorja Smith

I need to grow and find myself Before I let somebody love me Cause at the moment I don't know me

Something for Bhadra, in reference to this excerpt of chapter 7 of forgotten idols. To Kyrat, she had been Sakshi Bal. If she was herself, as Bhadra Najjar, this country would have eaten her alive long ago. Nobody else knew her, not even Noore, not even Ajay, for fuck’s sake, because nobody wanted her to stay alive long enough. [...] So today, for now, from yesterday to next week, she was Sakshi— the hero of Kyrat. The fighter for freedom. She made sure of that as she shot down one soldier after another during a package drop in Utkarsh.

#anyway to conclude #yes im insane this took me around 13 hours to write down and my background music had a lot of fuckin labrinth playing #last part is to be edited since this might have to shift with ajay being involved #but yeah to anybody thank you for sticking around for this au its super slay of yall to enjoy my baby my masterpiece my WORK #far cry 4 #far cry 6 #diego castillo #bhadra #ajay ghale #noore najjar #crazy old tyrant au

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nahoyaglock · 3 years ago

Text

WHEN I STOP BREATHING..

pairings! ushijima x reader

summary! sitting on the beach, so close to each other they can hear each other’s heartbeats. They both smile and they watch the world end right in front of them, reminiscing on all they’ve been through together. Why does the end of the world look so beautiful?

genre! angst

word count! didnt bother actually counting so ill estimate maybe 2000+

warnings! end of the world, death, murder mention, slight ooc ushijima idk its the end of the world so pff

a/n! uh idk i wanna hurt people, sorry if this is bad i havent written in a while :p i feel like the beginning was really good, the middle was ass and the end was okay but hoh im happy enough w this. I also cried writing this ngl lmaoo also did not fix any errors so my bad

You knew it was coming, you both did. New reports, articles, it was trending on all social media platforms. It was unavoidable, what could you do but waste away your last few days, watching old shows you watched as a kid, harsh knocks and cries from your doors from friends and family. You couldnt face them, you just wanted to drown out the thought of what was coming the next few hours of the day.

You had woken up and sluggishly dragged yourself from the comfort of your bed to your dirty kitchen, littered with dirty dishes and some uneaten food that youd try to make, but didn't have the stomach to eat. Your phone rang atleast every hour or two, many unanswered calls and long voicemails you couldnt bother to listen to.

There was a knock on your door, and you sighed, not wanting to bother with facing the person at the door. You turned on your heels, about to head to your room when you heard the voice call out to you.

"y/n."

Out of all the people why did it have to be him. You bit your lip and let out shaky breaths. You took another step, freezing at another set of knocks. The last persom you wanted to see was your boyfriend.

"y/n let me in or ill tear this door down." His voice was stern, laced with seriousness and slight concern. You wanted to open it, let him in and crumble into his arms, but it hurt so bad.

"Go away." You spoke, loud enough to be heard through the door, but not loud enough to be a yell.

"y/n."

You hesitantly walked to the door, unlocking the bottom lock, the top lock remaining unlocked, too bothersome for you to have delt with anyways. At the sound of the click of the locks he opened the door with quick motions, while also being careful not to knock you over.

At the sight of his big frame you felt like the world had just stabbed you through the chest 28 times. You backed up with quick steps are your boyfriend reached out to hug you, scared that his touch would break down your facade. You tripped over your own feet, landing hard on your butt.

"Ush.. Ushijima," you started, not knowing exactly what you were trying to say, "Please dont touch me."

His heart sank when he saw you, lifeless and so frail. He guessed you havent been getting much sleep- or maybe too much sleep, and not eating as he took a quick glance towards the food littered kitchen counter.

It wasnt any better for you, seeing your normally cold and calm boyfriend with a worried expression and eye bags that made it obvious he hasnt got much sleep either.

You pull yourself up, your eyes boring through your boyfriends abdomen as you bit your lip, trying to think of what to say, and to also keep yourself from falling apart. "What do you want?"

"y/n. Dont be cold to me." It wasnt a question, but it wasnt a demand. "Sorry," you mumbled, leaving you two in silence for a while.

"Ushi, you should go home," you said, feeling your heart race, every second you spent in his presence, under his gaze, killed you. "You should call Tendou or something."

"Toshi." He said, making your head shoot up, looking him in his eyes, seeing a tear roll down his cheek, his face remaining mostly emotionless, fear slightly present in his eyes. "Please keep calling me Toshi."

You felt a pang in your heart, suddenly the reality of things hitting you. You were the only one going through this, you knew this but never gave it more than a mere thought. He was scared, he didnt know what he was doing, he just knew to find comfort in you, like youve told him to for many years into your relationship.

"Toshi," you breathed, reaching up to wipe the tear from his cheek, "Toshi lets go somewhere."

You never felt the need to go outside, wanting to be isolated, but being here with your boyfriend, you felt like running away, wanting to escape from the dark pit of your home. "Lets go to the beach"

"y/n–"

"Lets go. Lets go, right.. right now Toshi," you felt as if though youve felt shoked by lightning, like you suddenly got hit with some sugar rush.

"We dont have time–"

"We do Toshi, we do, we do," you saw the corner of his lips raise up into a small smile. He hated seeing you like this but he was glad you were more alive than you were minutes before. You knew this, what he was thinking, and you knew his smile had so much sadness behind it, "we have time, lets go, lets go!"

You grabbed his hand and dragged him out of your apartment, not bothering to change from your days out clothing or close the door behind you. It wouldnt matter in another hour anyways.

The ride there was mostly silent, songs playing quietly on the radio. You watched as you passed through the town, the streets were slightly empty, stores looked run down, some stores even tore up and empty.

"Has it been like this since.. since the announcement?" You mumbled, earning a hum for Ushijima.

"Yeah, yeah it has." He knew that you didnt go out, and he was slightly grateful for it. The world went to shit after the announcement, many lootings, murders and other various crimes being commited.

"Im glad your safe Toshi," you spoke into your palm.

"Im glad your safe too."

The ride went on in silence until you got to the beach. You both climbed out of the car, the beautiful blue sea sparkling under the sunny sky. It was funny how such a depressing day could look so so beautiful.

"Hmm, this is the beach we went to with the team our senior year, remember?" He asked and turned to face you. The fear in his eyes was much more evident in the light, along with signs of personal neglict. He hasnt been taking good care of himself either.

You walk around the front of the car to grab his hand, your small hands tracing light circles on his rough palms before linking your hands together, giving him a comforting squeeze. "I remember."

He let out a shaky breath he didnt know he was holding in, and you two found a nice spot on the beach to sit and watch the sky. "Toshi, do you remember the time goshiki got gummy bears stuck in his nose?"

He looked at you, and his face softened, "yeah. Yeah i do." He let out a small chuckle at the thought of his old teammates. "Do you remember when Tendou took my water bottle and filled it with really sour lemonade?" He asked, you could hear his voice unravel into a more comfortable tone, instead of one holding in so much hurt and fear.

"Ha, i actually helped him with that you know?" You spoke up, a small grin on your lips as your boyfriend grabbed your waist, pulling you closer to him. "We'll its okay, because it was 2 years ago."

It had been 2 years. 2 years since you had become shiratorizawas manager, 2 years since you made the number 1 ace fall head over heels for you, 2 years since you had went on your first date with him.

"2 years, its been so long." You laid your head on Ushijimas arm, feeling tired. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and placed a kiss atop your head.

"Thats when we first started dating," you spoke, shoulders shaking with a small laugh, "i would've never imagined to have the nations number 1 ace fall so madly in love with me." You laughed and turned to your boyfriend to continue your teasing, but stopped when you saw him looking back at you.

He couldn't respond with anything more than a mere chuckle, tears now streaming down his cheeks. You bit your lip, scooting closer to him so you were in his lap, wrapping your arms around his large stature.

"Toshi, I love you." It was no more than a whisper and he placed a warm, loving kiss to your temple, rubbing your back softly as he let out a shaky laugh.

"y/n god, you make it so hard not to cry." He whispered in an unstable tone, resting his head atop yours. "I love you too."

This was how it was, clinging to the other and sharing old tales of your days spent with Ushijima and the boys, tales of times tendou had snuck out of the dorms and got caught by washijou, or when goshiki cut his bangs too short, or how Ushijima brought your parents a half eaten watermelon as a gift.

Those last moments spent with laughs and tears, kisses and hugs, warmth and comfort, those were your best memories. Despite the fate to cross you, Ushijima and everyone else in the world, you felt like you could smile for the first time.

You would smile alot, but it felt different this time. You convinced yourself that it was just because you had been withering away for the past days, but you knew it was because you felt free.

You had no worries in the moment with your lover, you didnt need to think about getting up for work the next day, or how you would afford next months rent. You felt like the largest weight had been lifted off of you, and you could really smile for the first time.

There was a slightly rumble if the ground that had made you and Ushijima go silent. You pulled away from your spot in the crook of his neck to look at him, fear still in his eyes.

"I dont wanna die," he chuckled out, "but im not sad." He drew small shapes into your hips with his thumbs, looking onto your laps instead of your face, and you just stared at him.

His usually stoic face was calmed, relaxed, his jaw unclenched and his eyes soft. You hadnt seen so many emotions from your boyfriend so much, it was almost scary. But he looked so gorgeous, he was your world.

"Wakatoshi Ushijima, you know," your placed your hands on both sides of his face, "it doesnt matter what happens to this world, because," you placed a passionate kiss to his lips, the tears finally falling from your eyes, "you, you're my world Toshi."

He let out a noise that was similar to a choke, tears rolling down the apple of his cheeks as he placed his forehead to yours, letting his shoulders shake with hard sobs. Loud crashes, screams and car alarms had let you know it was coming, the end of the world.

The last thing you saw was Ushijima, smiling snd crying, mouthing out one last 'I love you'.

Why does the end of the world look so beautiful?

#writings 📃#ushijima.💭#ushijima x reader #ushijima x y/n #ushijima angst #ushijima imagine #ushijima fanfic #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #ushijima wakatoshi fanfic #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu fanfic #haikyuu imagine #hq x reader #hq x you #hq angst #hq fanfic #hq imagines

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karlyfr13s · 4 years ago

Text

One Love, One Lifetime

A Phantom of the Opera inspired Captain Swan AU

Rated M, cover art by @hollyethecurious

Chapter Two: Think of Me

Friday dawned clear and bright, and Emma woke earlier than usual. While she was normally happy to lay in bed until mid-morning, today marked the beginning of the season and the opening gala at the opera house, and she was anxious to get limbered up and ready for tonight’s performance. The day would require all-hands on deck, and Emma loved it when the whole venue was buzzing with excited and busy cast and crew members. Today was particularly special for Emma as she was given her first starring role. Regina hadn’t shown her face since the incident earlier in the week, though several of her lackies had been spotted skulking around backstage, most likely gathering gossip for her as usual. Emma was sure the managers spent most of their waking hours attempting to call Regina back and garner her favor. Sure, she wasn’t beloved by most of the crew--who she constantly berated and treated like personal servants--and a substantial portion of the cast ran hot and cold in their feelings--probably because she criticized everyone but Sidney and herself--but... Emma lost her train of thought as she stretched with her fellow dancers. Regina was the leading lady, so surely they had no choice but to try and lure her back, right?

Emma wondered aloud to Ruby whether Booth and the others were hellbent on getting Regina back on stage because they didn’t have faith in Emma’s own abilities, guessing that her managers might already fear the worst in tonight’s opening show. Ruby dismissed the thought out of hand as any best friend would do with only hours remaining before showtime. Of course, her managers had no idea how nervous Emma was, but ever since the impromptu audition on Tuesday evening, Emma had nightly conversations with her hidden Angel. He had coached and encouraged her as she practiced, working to perfect her enunciation and ensure she hit each note of the final cadenza in the complex aria with precision and confidence. Though the Angel didn’t always speak to her, Emma never felt alone in the moments she practiced despite the rest of the large venue sitting dark and silent in the small hours of the night.

As she readied herself for costume and makeup, anxiety rushed through her, sending Emma’s pulse racing and her breathing became shallow gasps. She tried to still the fluttering in her stomach, tried to shift into the single-minded focus she usually felt as she warmed up with the rest of the chorus, but doing so alone was far more difficult. Yet as she gazed at her reflection in the floor-length mirror, Emma felt a strange and sudden quiet fall over her. She could do this--she was going to do this. Tonight. She had trained for it, had been practicing numerous complex pieces for years now, had intentionally set herself the repeated challenge of playing secret understudy to Regina. With a nod to her reflection, Emma left her room and made for the theatre and the final rehearsals for blocking.

That evening as she slipped into the sparkling white ball gown, as the costuming crew clipped glittering crystalline stars into her long golden waves, she coached herself under her breath. She said a quick word of gratitude to the spirit of her father and to the Angel whose influence brought her to this moment. As she took her place backstage, Emma straightened her shoulders and Ruby snuck in to give her a quick kiss on the cheek. “They’ll never know you’re sweating a river under that thing--way too many layers for anyone to notice. Plus, they’ll be so blown away by your voice that nothing else will matter. Go get ‘em, girl!”

With that, Emma Nolan took the stage and had her first moment in the spotlight. It was an out of body experience. Surely it wasn’t little orphan Emma who commanded the entire stage? There was no way some girl from small-town Maine stood at the Paris Opera House-- at Palais Garnier --and bespelled an entire audience with the light, complicated, and wondrously beautiful “Think of Me”. Knowing the box would be vacant, Emma set her sights on box five and put her whole heart into the next four minutes. She could feel the swell of the music accompanying her, letting the warmth of the strings pull her onward, compelling the crowd with the sudden softness as she reached the third verse, and allowing herself to be taken over by the moment as the song crescendoed.

Recall those days

Look back on all those times

Think of the things we'll never do

There will never be a day

When I won't think of you

In the back of her mind, she heard a loud call, “Bravo!’” ring from the audience, and in the last verse of her solo, Emma felt as though she were flying. Her voice building higher and higher in the cadenza, each note crisp and clear as it rang across the theatre and back to her so that when the last two notes burst from her like some wild, magical thing they were half drowned out by the standing ovation that spontaneously began right in front of her.

Emma didn’t have time to remove her makeup or change before she was completely swamped by well-wishers. Cast, crew, and several attendees who’d somehow made their way to the hall that led backstage all vied for her attention. She couldn’t catch half of what they were saying, wished desperately to get out of her heavy gown, and found herself repeatedly saying ‘thank you’ more than anything else. It was entirely overwhelming. Thankfully, her managers interrupted, Jefferson swooped in and took a bouquet from her laden arms, offering her a flute of champagne instead. “Hell of a first night, Emma,” he beamed at her and they clinked glasses. “Seems Madame Lucas was right about you -- we’ve had to set half the stagehands to temporary security so we can get people out of the building instead of having them wander in search of you.”

“He’s right,” Locksley chimed in, freeing her other arm from the elaborate bouquet of stargazer lilies, which had been starting to make her nose tickle. “You’re quite the sensation, Miss Nolan!” She thanked him for the kind words and he insisted she call him Robin, introducing the dark-haired woman who’d appeared at his elbow as his wife, Marian. “With that, we must take our leave. Babysitters are ludicrously expensive in this city, and Roland should already be asleep anyway. Enjoy the moment, Miss Nolan, it certainly won’t be the last.”

Gradually, the crowd began to disperse and Emma was given a small amount of breathing room between introductions and congratulations. Her feet were aching and she was about to call it a night, when she saw a familiar face lingering in the crowd. “Graham?” She took a few steps toward the man, his light brown hair falling into his eyes as he grinned at her. She took off at a run, kicking off her heels, and he caught her in his arms. “I knew that was your voice -- I just knew it! What are you doing here? How?”

He spun her in a circle, the vast skirts of her gown swirling around them and clearing a space as several onlookers gawked at the pair. “My parents are patrons of the opera,” he explained briefly, kissing her cheek and blushing pink at the public attention. “When I heard tonight was your debut, I told them I’d represent the Humberts for the opening gala -- Emma, you were incredible out there!” The reunion was abruptly interrupted when Granny caught Emma’s eye where she lingered near the hall to her apartment. Granny gestured to her watch and Emma immediately stepped back from Graham’s embrace.

“It’s so good to see you, but...I have to go for the night, Graham, it’s late.” As she spoke, he took both her hands in his, wrapping her slender fingers in his warm grasp and insisting they go out and celebrate both her triumphant debut and their unexpected reunion. “I can’t, Graham, I’d love to -- it’s been so long since we saw each other -- but curfew is strict here, and I have to go. Goodnight.” She stepped back, gathering up her shoes as she fled the attention. The last thing she saw before making her way to her room was Graham with his brow knit in confusion. The image was quickly swept from her mind when she saw her whole apartment overflowing with bouquets and congratulatory gifts.

She turned to face Granny, her eyes wide. The old woman offered a kind smile, though she didn’t mention Graham or even ask who he was, which seemed odd. Instead, she handed Emma a single, perfect pink rose unlike any she’d seen. The stem was tied with a black satin ribbon and as she passed the delicate bloom to Emma, Granny’s only explanation was “He’s pleased with your performance, Emma. You sang like an angel tonight.” She helped Emma out of the elaborate costume, taking care to brush out her hair as she removed the numerous clips and pins. Emma hummed to herself as the two worked, Granny focusing on the items that needed to be brought back to the costuming department while Emma swiped her way through layer after layer of makeup until she was left fresh-faced and rosy-cheeked from the experience. She slipped behind the wardrobe screen after Granny left, changing into a soft floor-length robe.

Graham was here. It had been years since they last saw one another, and Emma tried to hold the vision of him now -- a man grown, complete with stubble on his cheek -- alongside the boy she’d spent so much of her childhood with. So many days had been spent at the top of her father’s loft, daydreaming and sneaking chocolates with Graham -- he was an excellent storyteller, and seemed to have a knack for knowing when her father was feeling particularly unwell. After they received the news that her father’s illness was incurable, Graham had become a daily presence in the house. He was always helping out -- fixing leaky faucets or repairing the shutters after a bad storm. As she sat and pondered her own reflection, Emma was drawn back to their freshman year of high school and to her first kiss -- their first kiss --she’d always assumed she’d end up with the boy next door.

That had changed with the revelation her father was taking her to Paris. Graham had not taken it well, and had stormed out her door for the last time two weeks before she uprooted her whole life with the move. She had needed him, had relied on him as a constant in her life, but almost immediately she saw him around town with someone else. Emma found out later it was some woman a few years older than Graham, and heard they had followed one another through Europe for a year before starting university in England. While that clearly hadn’t worked out, the old wound still stung. Undoubtedly, he had been through Paris several times, and he knew precisely where she was. So why had he never visited until now? It seemed likely she was only catching his attention now that it was her name on the marquee.

“Darling, who exactly is Graham Humbert to you?” came the voice in the darkness. Though Emma knew it could only be her Angel, she’d also never heard him like this. Usually the voice was low and encouraging, a mentor and gentle guide to her, but now...something was off. His pitch was too high, his pace too rapid and it felt angry somehow. She explained to the darkness around her that Graham was a friend, and had been for years. “Uncanny, isn’t it? He reappears suddenly just as you step into your own destiny,” the voice trailed off, his tone harsh and clipped.

“What do you mean? You don’t think...Graham wouldn’t do that! We’ve been friends since we were kids -- his family’s a patron of the arts, that’s all.” Emma felt oddly torn, needing to defend Graham’s intentions, while also feeling compelled to soothe the hurt her Angel so clearly felt right now.

“Men of low ambition seek greatness only through possessions -- through acquiring what is not theirs to have , darling.” His voice kept shifting, changing its origin as though he was everywhere and nowhere. “You are a marvel,” he crooned, voice softening to a low purr in her ear though he remained out of sight. His tone shifted abruptly, voice nearly a growl. “You were born for more than his small mind can imagine, and I will not see him bask in your glory. This triumph belongs to us -- to you and I alone.”

Emma realized then that she mattered to this unseen Angel, though for the life of her she couldn’t understand why . What’s more, he seemed to have eyes and ears everywhere -- had he been in the crowd after the curtain call? Had she seen him and simply not known? The thought seemed impossible; she’d always been sure she would know him the instant she saw him. “I know that,” she began, not knowing what he wanted from her, but wanting to try. “I never thought I could do anything like I did tonight, and without you, I know I never would have tried. Please,” she faltered then, wondering where to go from here and how best to help him understand how much she valued every lesson and moment they’d spent together. She squared her shoulders, looking at her resolute expression in the mirror. “Please, let me finally see you. Let me know who you really are -- who it is that made tonight possible.”

“Flattery will get you everywhere, my dear. Go on then, if you’re sure you can handle it, keep watching your mirror, Emma.” She leaned forward, at first seeing only herself gazing back until the surface swirled with crimson smoke and from the cloud emerged two brilliant blue eyes set in an astoundingly handsome face.

“Oh,” she heard herself gasp softly and she reached toward the image as the smoke cleared. She took in the black hair that tumbled artfully into his eyes, the confident smirk that gave her a brief flash of white teeth. She reached out, startling herself when her fingers found, not the solid glass she’d expected, but the scratch of the stubble that dusted his cheek.

“Come now, darling. I know you’re more curious than that,” he hummed, waiting patiently and leaning against what now appeared as a doorway rather than her mirror. She took her time, sweeping her eyes over his strong, lean frame. He wore all black from the embroidered silk waistcoat to his full-length leather coat and Emma was sure on most men it would look outlandish, but he was definitely not most men. His wolfish grin must have erased something in her brain because she realized belatedly he had a gleaming silver hook where his left hand should be. It appeared deadly sharp, and she wondered what story had led to its existence. She knew she was staring and tried to say something, anything at all.

“How?” she eventually sputtered, not knowing how to form the question she wanted to ask. He was real, and here. The man -- the Angel? Did angels look like this? -- who had watched over her for years now. The man who taught her to take raw talent and shape it into art. He was real. She reached out, laying her hand flat against his chest, her eyes fixed on the place over his heart. Taking a steadying breath, she slowly turned her gaze up to meet his eyes. “You’re real.” She felt stupid the instant it left her mouth, though his low chuckle wasn’t unkind.

“Real indeed, darling. And to your earlier enquiry: magic.” She tittered, faking a laugh at this and thinking she may have found herself at the mercy of a lunatic. He broke out in a warm laugh at her expression. “Not many people greet me in such a way, but you are not most people are you Emma?” She briefly wondered if he read her earlier thoughts, but before she could think much more he offered his arm which she took out of pure curiosity. “Perhaps a demonstration then?” And suddenly the world was shrouded in crimson smoke.

...

Thank you @ultraluckycatnd for beta-ing this piece, and @lonelyspectator12 for being an incredible brainstorming partner.

Shout-out to @eastwesthomeisbest for your artwork--it inspires me to persevere past writer's block!

Tagging CSMM Discord and those who've asked:

@kmomof4, @teamhook, @veryverynotgood, @caught-in-the-filter, @hollyethecurious, @laschatzi, @donteattheappleshook, @lonelyspectator12, @the-darkdragonfly, @zaharadessert, @winterbaby89, @jrob64, @wefoundloveunderthelight, @ultraluckycatnd, @stahlop, @alexa-fangirl-forever, @superchocovian, @monosalvatore16, @snowbellewells, @batana54

#one love one lifetime #karly tries to write #CSMM #captain swan AU #cs ff #killian jones #emma swan #dark hook

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stoopsbookstore · 5 years ago

Text

The Fan (Chapter 2)

Warnings - Mentions of groping, accident at a performance

“Do you know what happened to your fansite, Y/N?”

Aya looked at her group member, scrolling through Instagram to see Milton's post, showing the phone screen to Y/N.

"Wow, he seems pissed," Y/N read the post, feeling uncertain about the post, "I mean, I guess it's sweet he cares enough to get mad over people trying to get upskirt shots."

"And he hasn't tried to grope her yet," Sanghee jumped over the sofa to sit next to Y/N, throwing her arm around her, "and if he does, I'm sure security will ban him like that guy who tried to go through our dressing room and sniff our underwear."

"Not funny," Y/N threw a pillow at the laughing Sanghee, hitting her face, "Yunhee was terrified, the poor thing wanted to escorted everywhere."

"She's our maknae, of cours-"

"To be fair, a 15 year old should be able to handle going to the bathroom without having a security guard stand outside the stall," Aya corrected Sanghee.

"Let's focus on something good. The previews of the photos are amazing! Look!" Chinsun hooked up her laptop to the TV, gleefully sorting through the photos, "Firethorn is amazing! Look at the angle on this one."

"Is he one of the guys from that ATEEZ studio Milton mentioned?" Chinsun opened a bag of chips, crunching them one after anothet, "isn't there a bunch of them?"

"However many there is, they take amazing photos," Y/N clicked the mouse, seeing all of the members throughout the year they've been together.

The group was broken out of their trance, their manager had entered the dorm's living room.

"We have to go, girls! 2 hours until showtime!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why am I being dragged along?"

Hongjoong was being pulled by Yunho and Wooyoung, the pair hurrying through the crowd.

"Because we need someone to hold our shit!" Yunho gave his camera bag to the older boy, looking through his camera, taking test shots of the arena, "I would've asked Seonghwa, but he's still upset about his camera."

"I would be too if some sleazeball pushed someone into me," Wooyoung snapped a picture of the crew setting up the stage.

"Well, I need to go take a piss, take your shit," Hongjoong handed Yunho back his luggage, handing to the bathroom before the performance started.

"He's going to miss the performance, he's not going to be able to get a good seat!" Yunho freaked out, waving his camera wildly and accidentally hitting a little fanboy who had been holding a sign for Yunhee, "oh shit, my bad, little dude. Here, you can have my lightstick."

The little boy stopped sobbing, snatching the Blossom Bong out of his hand, walking away from the tall boy, pouting for his father. The lights had changed to the group's signature colors, a dark green and a light mint, representing the stem of a flower. Erupting from the audience, the cheers drowned out the sound of whacks on metal.

Yunho's phone started buzzing, a text from Hongjoong appearing.

Dude, I can't get back in. They said once you're out, you're out.

Wtf thats bull shit! Its fine, the mall is just 2 blocks away, I'll go there, get some food, how long is the concert?

"Pick your petals! Hi, we are Bloom!"

Only about 90 minutes

ok, do you guys want anything?

Yeah, just get us some pizza. Ill text you when it's over. Sorry bro.

Its okay, Im not big on them anyway. And we'll have plently of more chances to see them.

After a few songs, the girls stood on stage to talk to the audience, a formality of their concerts.

"Petals, we are so proud of you," Chinsun had someone's camera, taking a selfie with Yunhee who was talking to the crowd, "because of you, we are able to stand on stage and dance, rap and sing, we're allowed to live our dream."

"Yunhee, you softie," Y/N was on the other end of the stage, holding a stuffed animal that someone had thrown on stage, "We may not have had a first win, we may not have a number one album, but we're with you guys and that's all that matters!"

"But I'm expecting a win for our comeba-"

Sanghee and Yunhee ran to Y/N, covering her mouth and dragging her to the floor.

"Just ignore her, she has a big mouth," Aya pointed her microphone at Y/N, the trio laughing on the stage floor, "she's always talking about crazy stuff. A comeback? Next month? That's insane!"

"But," the audience held their breath, Yunho and Wooyoung's camera clicking photos, a smug grin adorning Chinsun's face, "do you want a preview?"

The crowd roared into a thunderous applause, the girls gathering at center stage, waiting for Aya to come to them.

When Aya was about to step on the platform, it had collapsed, causing her to fall six feet onto her ankle.

"Fuck!" She had screamed in pain, the other members being held back by security as backstage crew helped Aya to her feet, her ankle throbbing in intense pain, "my leg! My fucking leg!"

"Holy shit!"

Wooyoung and Yunho saw the incident, Aya just a few feet front of them. She held her ankle when a security guard came, picking her up and bringing her offstage. The rest of the members were in a circle, talking to each other when their managers walked up, pulling them off stage. An announcement came up, the audience groaning and booing at what the voice had to say.

"Due to unforeseen circumstances, we have to cancel the rest of the concert. Check your email for any information about refunds, exchanges or other opportunities. We apologize for the inconvenience."

Yunho's phone vibrated, Wooyoung snapping a few photos of the downed platform.

"Dude," Yunho looked at Wooyoung with a disappointed look, the younger male lowering his camera in shame, "it's Hongjoong. Come on, let's go."

What happened?! Im in the lobby and heard a crash!

Aya got hurt! The stage fell

how did the stage fall?

I dont know. Theyre kicking everyone out and Bloom was pretty much ripped off stage. Its fucking bullshit, but I hope Aya's okay.

How is everyone else? Hows Yunhee hows Y/N?

Theyre fine from what we saw, a bit shaking. Where are you in the lobby?

Near the dipping dots

"Do you think that Milton guy will have something to say?"

"I don't think I even saw him there," Wooyoung mentioned the apparent absence of the fansite master, "I wonder if he had to do something with it."

Yunho scoffed at the theory, spotting Hongjoong in the disgruntled crowd, passing by the little boy, who was now full on pouring out tears.

"He may be crazy, but I don't think he would be that crazy."

"Who?" Hongjoong sipped his soda, Wooyoung taking his drink while the trio watched the people leave the arena, "that White Jasmine guy?"

"Yeah, he wasn't there," Yunho checked his phone, "no post either."

Hongjoong, Yunho and Wooyoung begun to hid out to the car, the cloud hanging out the parking lot dark and gloomy as the cries of little boys and girls could be heard for miles. Yunho started the car, Wooyoung getting in the back while Hongjoong turned on the radio, the car filling with one of Bloom's b-sides.

"Not now," Wooyoung reached between the front seats, switching it to classic music.

The rest of the ride spent in tense disappointment.

#Hongjoong #ateez #ateez scenarios #ateez au #ateez smut #ateez imagines #the fan #Halloween series #my writings

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smileyoongle · 6 years ago

Text

Idol BTS! Reaction To You Having A Terminal Illness Part 2

Hey there! I didn't think my terminal illness reaction was that good. Thank you so much. I'm pretty shocked that you actually wanna read more to it. So I hope you like it, anon!

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Kim Seokjin:

Jin sat at the very bench where he had found out about your illness. He still wasn't over you, he would never be. It had been a year since you passed away and this was a usual habit of his. He would come to this place and imagine as if you were sitting by him, listening to whatever he had to say. He closed his eyes and let the wind caress his face. "Hello, princess. I'm back, as always." He let out a chuckle at his own words. "I hope heaven's treating you well. If they aren't, then they better be careful. I'll be there soon, you know." He said, looking at the stars in the sky. Jin knew very well that soon meant a pretty long time, but he was willing to wait it out. "Oh, did I mention that they tried to set me up on a blind date again? Yeah, I don't understand why they wouldn't give up because there's no way someone else can be what you were to me." He mumbled, eyes gazing at the empty seat next to him. He remembered how you told him that he had to find someone. Someone who would love him as you did. But Jin knew that there was no one. There could never be. Suddenly, his phone rung, screen flashing jungkook's name. He shook his head and ignored the call. "I'll be back, princess. Take care. I love you." He smiled at the stars. Getting up from the bench, he went to his car, knowing that he'll be back and you'll listen to him. Like always.

Kim Namjoon:

Namjoon stood near the grey stone, your name engraved in it. It gave him great comfort in knowing that you were still here, beneath all the mud, resting in peace now. He kneeled beside your grave, placing the fresh orchids above all the other flowers. Everyone had gone home after the ceremony was over, leaving Namjoon to grieve in his own way. Your family had also left with heavy hearts, tears streaming down their faces on the loss of someone so dear to them. "I miss you, already," Namjoon whispered, clenching his eyes shut, trying not to cry. Not being able to hold it back, he let it all out. Taking off his glasses that you loved so much, he covered his face with his hands. The gentle wind ruffled his hair as if it were your fingers. He felt your presence, your head on his shoulder, your hand rubbing his back soothingly. "It'll be okay, Joon. I promise." Your sweet voice sounding like music to his ears. He slowly removed his hands from his face, revealing his red eyes and wet cheeks. You smiled at him before placing your lips on his forehead. Namjoon knew very well that this was only an illusion and he wanted it to last as long as possible. "I know it'll be okay, Y/N." He said, crying and holding your hand as you started to fade away. "I love you." He sniffled, watching as you left him. He stood up, taking slow steps backwards, eyes never leaving your grave. Turning around, he forced himself not to look back. "I'll be fine, Y/N. I promise." He muttered, taking in a deep breath and preparing to start a life without you.

Min Yoongi:

The computer screen emitted light strong enough to illuminate the dark studio. Yoongi had been writing songs for the upcoming album, barely getting any sleep. He decided to take a break and proceeded to save the track, closing the tab to reveal your face. It had been 4 years since you went to a better place but it didn't feel like it. Instead, it was as if you never left, as if you were constantly around him. Maybe it was because of a certain 12-year-old girl that had eyes like yours even though she was adopted. Yoongi sighed and closed his eyes, ready to take a nap. A few minutes later, he felt hands covering his eyes and a small giggle ringing through the studio. "You're back early," Yoongi mumbled, taking the smaller hands into his own. "Yup, I had a dream where mom told me to check on you so here I am and clearly she was right." Said your daughter, gazing around the darkroom before going to switch on the lights. Yoongi let out a groan before turning his chair around to see her sitting on the plush couch, fiddling with the hem of her school uniform. Yoongi frowned and went to sit beside her. "And what could be bothering my rockstar?" He asked, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. The young girl hesitated before raising her head to see Yoongi's concerned face. "It's Mother's Day tomorrow." She let out the words and gazed down at the carpet. Yoongi felt a wave of sadness go through him when he saw the tears trailing down his daughter's cheek. "I miss her, dad." She mumbled, voice cracking before she broke down into sobs. Yoongi pulled her into a hug and tried to control the tears threatening to spill. "She doesn't have to be here to be with you, remember? She's watching us from up there and she would hate to see us like this. Do you want her to be sad?" He said, voice as gentle as a feather. The 12-year-old shook her head and wiped her tears. Even though you left, you definitely prepared them to live without you. It wasn't easy at first but life goes on and people move on too.

Jung Hoseok:

The children laughed and chased each other around, the sun shining brightly in the sky. Hoseok admired the scene in front of him, thinking about the possibilities of saving at least one of the kids from being consumed by the illness that took you away from him. He looked up at the sky and smiled. He had just made a generous donation to a cancer charity for children in your name. He didn't want anyone to ever go through the pain of losing someone in such a terrible way. He felt his coat being tugged at, making him snap out of his thoughts. He looked down to find a little girl, holding a little teddy bear in one hand. "Hello Mr, are you an angel?" She asked, looking up at him with big and hopeful eyes. He chuckled and kneeled down in front of her. "What makes you say that?" He asked, still smiling. "Ms Jo said that an angel had come to let us know that we'll be okay. I'm sorry though, you see it's our playtime so no one was inside." She explained making hoseok's heart fill with warmth. He looked down at his shoes before looking back at her. "I am not an angel, sweets. But I do have an angel who sent me here. She's watching us from up there." He said, pointing up at the sky as the girl looked up. She smiled and asked him what the angel's name was. "Y/N." He answered. The little girl nodded and handed him her teddy bear. "Will you please give her this and tell her I said thank you?" She asked, gazing at Hoseok with her innocent eyes. Hoseok looked away as his eyes started to water. It had barely been 6 months without you and he was still trying to cope with the pain. He blinked away the tears and accepted the bear, nodding with a tight-lipped smile. The girl grinned and hugged him, making Hoseok feel better. He hugged her back and let a tear slip down his cheek. Before pulling away, he quickly wiped the tear. Waving him goodbye, the little girl ran back to her friends and Hoseok walked away. Maybe life won't be so bad. Maybe, just maybe he'll be happy again.

Park Jimin:

Jimin leaned his elbows on the railing in the huge balcony of the penthouse he had rented. The sun was setting on the horizon, the sky a beautiful mix of colours. This vacation was absolutely necessary after everything that he had been through. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of peace and contentment. Slowly, he felt your hands wrapped around him from behind. Smiling, he leaned his head back, resting it on your head. "Hi." You mumbled, grinning from ear to ear. He chuckled and turned around, pulling you into his chest. "Did you take your medicines?" He asked, swaying from side to side with you in his arms. You nodded and closed your eyes, listening to his heartbeat. A miracle recovery, the doctors had called it. You had survived even though everyone had already begun counting the number of days you had. "I'm happy." You stated and looked up to see Jimin's eyes. He smiled and leaned his forehead against yours. "Not more than me." He mumbled before kissing you. "I don't know what I would have done if-" you stopped him before he could complete that sentence by kissing him more deeply. Eventually, you both pulled away, gasping for breath. Jimin intertwined your fingers with his and kissed them one by one, letting his lips linger longer where the diamond ring adorned your finger. Now there was nothing that could take away the love you shared. "I can't wait to call you mine completely." He said, burying his face in your neck. You giggled and ran your hands through his hair. "And I can't wait to be yours completely." You replied, gazing at the sky which was now devoid of the sun.

Kim Taehyung:

Taehyung fluffed the pillows and arranged the blankets, making sure they were comfortable enough. The light from inside the truck streamed through the glass window lighting up the back of it. Taehyung grabbed his phone and checked the time. 2:00 AM. He smiled and looked at the sky. Finally, another item was checked off the bucket list that you both shared, witness a meteor shower together. "It's almost time," Taehyung announced, looking around once more to make sure everything was okay. He got off the back to help you climb up. You were still weak from all the treatments and medicines. Once he tucked you in, he got in beside you and held you close to him. "Are you cold?" He asked, brushing your hair off of your face. You shook your head and looked up at him. Suddenly, you saw bright lights from the corner of your eye making you turn your head. The rapid movement of the stars appearing and fading had you gasping in amazement. But Taehyung couldn't take his eyes off you. He had come so close to losing you. He was relieved that everything was okay now, you were okay and so was he. "I told you I'd complete the bucket list with you, didn't I?" He asked, taking your attention away from the stars. You smiled and kissed him. "I love you so much." You stated, closing your eyes and leaning on his chest. He grinned and kissed your head. "I love you more."

Jeon Jungkook:

Jungkook kicked a stone to the side as he walked beside his date for the evening. It was a blind date set up by his brother, an attempt to help him get over you. The date had thankfully come to an end and it was time to head home. Lana was a nice girl, warm and welcoming but she wasn't you. And Jungkook didn't want anyone who wasn't you. He turned to look at her when he heard her sigh. "So, who is she?" She asked, looking at the ground while continuing to walk. Jungkook almost tripped but composed himself. "What?" He looked at her with wide eyes. Lana chuckled and shook her head. "I've been on enough dates to know when someone is interested in me or someone else. So, tell me, who is that lucky girl?" She asked again, tucking her hair behind her ear. Jungkook bit his lip, guilty that he was caught. "She is no more. Died about 4 months ago." He answered. Lana stopped walking while Jungkook continued. "I'm sorry." She mumbled. Jungkook shook his head and gave her a small smile. He wasn't okay but he had to be. He promised you. Taking a glance at his watch, he cringed. It was almost midnight, he needed to hurry home. "Uh....look, I'm sorry that I probably ruined your hopes for this date but I really need to go now," Jungkook said in a rush. Lana smiled sympathetically and nodded. "I'll be here if you ever need anything." She waved her hand at him while he nodded and took off running. Opening the door to his house, he jogged to the kitchen and took out the cake that he had baked earlier in the day. Placing candles on it, he lit them up and took the cake to the living room where your photo hung on the wall above the fireplace. "Happy Birthday, my love." He whispered, blowing the candles and blinking away his tears. He missed you and he'll never stop missing you. He just needed to learn to live with this feeling and he hoped that someday he would.

Personally, I don't think this is good enough but hopefully it isn't that bad.

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