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luvbotclub · 4 years ago

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stay — part one: mark lee.

it’s not me, it’s you— you had a change of heart. what kind of change of heart was that and why didn’t feel it? or in which mark doubts himself as an idol, a boyfriend, and a person.

content warning for angst, i’m sorry markzens. 4,867 words.

this can be read as x reader or x oc since i didn’t give mark’s girlfriend a name (this applies to the other parts as well). the other parts may be a little delayed since i’m working on some other fics as well, but i’ll try my best to finish this series! i hope you will enjoy reading this one :D

the sun was shining outside his window. the sunlight seeped through his silk curtains, and for some reason, mark lee didn't feel like sliding them aside and welcoming the april warmth with open arms today, or any other day to be honest. he didn't bother getting up and cooking himself some delicious breakfast, nor did he get up and at least fix his appearance a little bit. he was so disheartened to do anything ever since she left.

but mark has been feeling less like... well, mark nowadays, so there was no question as to why he was acting the way he is. but who could blame him? almost five months has passed and he has made close to no progress with moving on from her. her departure and the demise of them has impacted mark in the worst ways there is to exist.

mark has managed to go out with taeyong and jaehyun for some coffee two days prior to this unfortunate saturday morning without somehow making everyone around him feel burdened by his troubled presence.

mark hated that feeling the most ㅡ the feeling that he’s slowly becoming a burden to the people around him. and perhaps he is, indeed, starting to become a burden to the people around him.

he's tried. he's tried so hard. but it hurts, so so much. the feeling of her warm embrace and the sound of her laugh and the way she smiles are all fucking imprinted in his mind. there was no escape from her torturous murder. the poison she uses is cutting into his skin… slowly, leaving a trail of rotten memories behind.

maybe if she hadn't left him so harshly, mark would've dealt with her farewell a lot better than he is doing right now. maybe, just maybe, if she hadn't been so cruel enough to just tell him straight in the face that it's not me, it's you, you had a change of heart; mark would've forgiven himself faster. his chest would have been filled with something other than guilt and confusion to what he's done wrong, why did she leave, who made her leave, what kind of fucking change of heart was that and why in fuck's name didn't he feel it.

mark has tried to spend more time with her. he really did try, but success came for his group faster than nct and sm entertainment had expected, and he trained longer in the practice room for six days per week for their tour and comeback to make a bigger impact than before. but, in the end, when he's back in their shared apartment, it feels like everything he did wasn't enough. the awards he won, the effort he put into dancing, each lyric he sings out every blurred, sweaty night just for millions to hear. they weren't enough to make her smile reach her eyes. they weren't enough to make her satisfied with him.

they weren't enough for her to stay.

sometimes, mark would think. maybe he's really the one to the blame. maybe he should have just taken more breaks and spent more time with her ― cook lunch with her, cuddle with her on the couch, give her massages while she ranted and ranted about the rude customers at her workplace, the marais. maybe, instead of sweating and singing his heart out, he could have stayed home. maybe he should have been a better boyfriend. maybe he wasn't good enough.

for the past few days, mark's mind has been filled with maybe's and what if's and i'm never going to be good enough's. it was strange. he felt all this remorse ― he even blamed himself because he was doing what he had been wanting to do for a long time ― and all this confusion because of a girl who has sent his friends snapchats of her playing just dance with her workmates a day after she said goodbye, because of a girl who left him on a living room floor with a heart that fell into pieces and the echoes of his pleas for her to please stay with me in each corner of the room ㅡ haunting him, crawling to his skin like the remnants of a bad dream.

it was selfish for mark to think, nor to say aloud, but a despicable part of him wished she felt somewhat guilty for leaving him behind in the dust like this ㅡ or even be concerned about his well being. but no. she left in the first place without a care ㅡ why would she care about whatever’s happening in mark’s mind, now that she has a great life without an idol boyfriend who's always dragging her down?

but today. today. it felt like the day to start living his life again, to live like mark lee who could make people smile just by the sound of his laugh alone. he's disappeared for exactly two weeks from television appearances, family dinners, and friendly get-togethers ㅡ even company parties, he couldn't attend. he was in the stage of denial in the first week, like he was mourning over a death of a loved one. fans have left comments, questions as to why he disappeared all of a sudden all over nct’s twitter and instagram pages and they’ve started to worry whether mark was doing okay or not. his family grew concerned for his well-being, so did his fellow members. they sent him food with stupid little hearts taped to the lunchbox (taeil once sent him naengmyun, along with a paper heart with a classy dad joke and his well wishes scribbled on it). they sent him encouraging messages almost everyday ― the fans, his family, his fellow members. they're all there for him, because they knew that mark isn't okay.

mark decided to get up from his bed an hour after he finished the piece of toast and cup of coffee he both made in a haste. he didn’t even bother putting anything along with the toast, and it was burnt. everyday, his breakfast gets worse. but he needed to put something in his stomach ― he's not going to be in this state forever and he still needed to take care of himself.

mark's grip on the plate was tight, knuckles white as he rested the ceramic plate on the sink. he turned his head after washing his hands and saw the shoe and coat rack by the front door. it was strange to see her newly bought pair of nikes and her ivory coat gone from the racks ― they were her least favoured articles of clothing. maybe she could have left them with him, so he could have something that reminds him of her presence.

but, no. that's way too cruel, isn't it? she did mark a favour of not leaving a single trace of her behind, even as little as a speck of dust from her belongings or a smear of her red lipstick on his favourite white mug. she knew she was practically death itself to him ― her name a lethal spoken curse, her scent a guilty pleasure, her voice a melody so deadly. to love her will be a death wish, but he feels and loves her without a single trace of fear that it'd harm him one day. he loves her. every inch, every night spent watching stupid random shows in the tv, every kiss, every parent joke they've cracked together. he misses them. he misses her. and sometimes he didn't even care if it were his fault or hers ― because either way, she'll still leave an empty shell in his chest, a shell that longed to be filled with her love again.

mark lee never thought it was possible for his heart to ache for someone so much.

he closed his eyes and breathed out a heavy sigh, wanting nothing more than to scream out his frustrations and drink some good fucking coffee right now. but the coffee maker was broken, and mark didn't feel like going out to town and buying a new one. it might sound like it was a stupid reason and he knew perfectly well of the fact, but he doesn't want everyone to see him like this... whatever he is right now.

is he even human at this point? he feels like someone ripped half of his body and soul and he just feels the opposite of the caring mark everybody adored. he feels like he doesn't even have a heart beating right now as his eyes are closed to the darkness — just an empty chest and an empty head.

mark wants to be somewhere else other than this damn apartment. it was way too depressing and he finally got sick of being burdened by it all — it was way too exhausting to be so burdened all the time, to have your head weighed down by thoughts of what could have happened. maybe he can go to a clear field with a nice, baby blue sky, or the coffee house in town where soft jazz played. he didn’t even like jazz. maybe anywhere, just to get away from this place. even the recording studio sounded inviting right now.

the roar of mark's ringtone ripped through the silent room, and it took him a few seconds to recover from the small jumpscare he got before he grabbed his phone that was in his sweatshirt pocket. mental note: put your phone in silent mode next time.

it was a text from jeno.

[jeno]: hi hyung. you up for coffee later with jaemin later? XD

mark suppressed the urge to roll his eyes at the emoticon. jeno could be really ridiculous (and cringy) sometimes, yet he couldn’t ignore the letters that were practically glowing at his eyes, screaming for his reply to be fuck yes i am up for this, but as mark was somewhat in mid reply (and it was an awfully nonchalant yeah, sure with no stupid emoji to support his message), his fingers stopped typing.

would it be worth it, though? he doesn't even have the mental energy to go out and buy his own food, let alone go out for coffee (even though he's succeeded once...). a small part of him felt bad for jeno. all the boy wanted was to drink coffee with his members, but mark's fucking sadness is stopping him. it's not even jeno's fault mark turned out like this these past few weeks.

after a few seconds of contemplating, mark continued typing his message, feeling a little afraid of making jeno think he was uninterested.

[me]: yeah, sure. 😃 can you pick me up?

he tapped the send button, instantly regretting that he added the smiling emoji at the end (because now he sounds so enthusiastic to go, even if a part of him really did) and the fact that he just asked his friend to do him yet another favour. mark felt bad for jeno, he really did, but he didn't even know where the coffee shop was, and, knowing mark, he gets lost sometimes because the boy had no sense of direction whatsoever. jeno's response came a few seconds after, which amazed mark for a bit since jeno was never the fastest replier.

[jeno]: geez, hyung 😒

[jeno]: i'll be there around 1, jaem had to run some errands so he’ll be a lil late. see you later!!!

feeling relieved jeno didn't pry any more into the subject, mark locked his phone and put in his sweatshirt pocket. he felt more fresh, somehow, he felt like his steps won't be heavy and that his life will actually improve today. like an imaginary weight has been lifted off of his shoulders. maybe he should treat jeno and jaemin with lunch one day, if the day went well.

after a few hours of sitting in the sofa and listening to a bunch of songs taeyong has sent him over the past few days, mark went to take a nice, warm shower and changed into his “outside” clothes (...which were the same as his stay-in clothes) and waited for jeno and jaemin outside his locked home, foot tapping on the pavement out of habit.

as promised through his text, jeno arrived at mark's place at the same time when the clock in mark's phone read 1:00 pm. mark felt like grabbing jeno and giving him the biggest hug he's ever given to another member once he jumped off of the black van he arrived in ㅡ the boy's done so much for him ㅡ sending lunchboxes, agreeing to meet up with him in 3am nights where mark couldn't sleep at all, and, now, agreeing to pick mark up right on time even if he probably had million of things going through his mind right now, with nct dream's comeback slowly approaching them.

“hey, hyung,” greeted jeno, brown hair swept to the side messily. after a very long time, there was a genuine smile on mark's lips ㅡ he was happy to see a familiar face in the midst of this chaos. “you ready to go?”

mark gave the younger man a nod, and pocketed his phone in his pants.

a few minutes of catching up led them to full time story-telling, which is totally typical of the parent-like pair of friends. mark was smiling the whole time, because, again, he was with a familiar face and he hadn't been able to speak his mind to another person for a few days, constantly insecure of what others would think of him and his thoughts.

they were overcome with surprise when the driver pulled up on the pavement since they were too caught up in their conversation to pay attention to their surroundings, signalling that they've arrived in the said café. it seemed like the other cafés he's visited before. it had treats and specials lined up by the baby blue tinted window, ranging from strawberry cream puffs to the manager's favourite mushroom pizza. mark looked at the café’s exterior in astonishment and glanced back at jeno. jeno had good taste.

mark looked at the café one more time. he still had a few moments before they went inside; jeno was taking too damn well to adjust his facemask. it was perfect ㅡ black tables at the patio with white chairs as a contrast, fancy little plants lined up just by the café's entrance.

it was all fun until his eyes darted over to the shop's logo, etched in a fancy script font and a mighty golden colour. the light in mark's eyes faltered and the smile plastered on his face dropped in desultory, as the letters made his throat go dry.

the marais.

singing is a stupid thing now. he doesn't feel like singing a bunch of twisted words just for millions to hear. no. he doesn't feel like doing anything. getting scolded at for not singing a note properly is getting tiresome. constantly redoing certain parts because the producer didn’t like it is getting tiresome. thinking of her at any given opportunity is getting tiresome. doing this, whatever it is... it's tiresome.

“i hope you’re happy today,” came the soft muse of donghyuck through his headset. it was strange that mark felt something strong snap in his chest just because of these words. they were going through the songs in the album and mark didn’t know why he was even required to be here for that — he wasn’t even in make your day.

when he heard his dongsaeng’s verse, he felt like crying again. he’s gotten so bad — this was just all so fucking tiring. all he can think about is the way she looked that day in the café, stunned to see the two tall idols in her sight and soon seeing jaemin rush into the shop without much care if he was causing a ruckus or not. she didn’t think that she would see him ever again, thinking that she’s ran away from all of that, the exhausting world of mark lee and being constantly shoved to the side.

“i'm ― i'm sorry," his voice is weak. the words were strained coming out of his throat. he couldn't breathe, but he had to do this. “i can’t do this. not today, no.”

am i really doing this?

mark's heart skipped a beat. yes.

he removed his headset quickly, the song cutting off just as jaehyun’s part began. mark grabbed his cap and mask from the table and put them on. he felt no feeling of hesitation or remorse from his actions as he stared at the producer and members, all staring back at him and obviously stunned. mark shook his head and turned his back on them, ignoring donghyuck’s tired and annoyed stare burning at the back of his head. he really tried to be okay for one day, but he can't do that. the closure she gave wasn't enough — well, was there ever any closure in the first place? he had to give his own closure, or else he'll explode from all these feelings burning his insides with guilt that he didn't even have to feel in the first place if he just became a better boyfriend, a better person.

“mark, come back here,” taeyong’s tired drawl came, echoing through the halls. mark stopped walking but didn’t face his hyung. “you’re really going to skip a recording just for a girl who doesn’t even want to see you anymore?”

taeyong’s words stung, but mark swallowed and gave a firm, “yes.”

as he walked down the hallways and ignoring the incredulous burning stares of the crew, wondering why the hell he was out in the hall instead of being in the recording studio like his schedule declared so, mark thought of all the things he'll say. they need to make sense or else skipping a recording session will all be for nothing and the scolding from taeyong would make him feel even guiltier for the rest of his entire life. i love you, you heartless prick. no. that's way too blunt. i love you, and i don’t need you to say the same thing. i just want you to say goodbye one last time.

that’s all mark ever wanted.

that’s all mark ever needed.

he called a taxi and immediately got in, telling the driver his destination which was the marais. a frown was evident on the young idol's face as his phone vibrated text message after text message, all either from taeyong or taeil telling him he has the next two hours to get his ass back to the studio or else they were telling the ceo about it. it was tiring. he was debating whether to ignore them or reason it out like the adult he was, because he was feeling annoyed at their lack of understanding and at the same time he just wanted to be mature with them.

both of mark’s options sounded too far out of his reach when the taxi driver suddenly stopped his car and told him they were already at his destination, and he was forced to lock his phone instead, ignoring the constant vibration of the device.

he started shaking as he gave the driver money, and his hands became sweaty when he exited out of the car and slammed the door shut. mark walked over to the café with a heavy heart, his legs wanting nothing more than to retreat to the studio and spare his ego the embarrassment, but he was here now. there was no point in turning back. he’d embarrass himself anyways if he came back to the studio, he could practically hear donghyuck cheekily saying “i told you so” and the small knowing smirk on the younger’s face. mark shuddered at the thought.

as he went through the door of the shop, he instantly got a whiff of the strong coffee they were brewing — their bestseller and the same coffee she used to bring home for mark to drink. the boy only swallowed the fear in his throat and shook the memories off.

he walked up to the counter, legs still shaky as the employee working the cashier looked at him with a bright smile, “um, hi. i’m looking for someone who works here? is—”

“mark?”

mark looked up at the sudden voice, his words cut off halfway. if his heart was already beating fast even before he'd seen her, mark was pretty sure it’d jump right out of his chest as he made eye contact with the woman who got him into this predicament in the first place. he exhaled heavily and bowed his head to the employee behind the cashier, apologizing for the interruption before walking over to her who was standing just by the kitchen door and dressed in the white coat she hated so much. the sight made mark want to go home for some reason.

“what are you doing here?” she laughed nervously as he came closer. “aren’t you busy? i heard you guys are having a comeback?”

mark shook his head, ignoring the urge inside of him to tell her i skipped a recording for you. he knew it wouldn't matter to her anyways. “i’m not busy at all. i just want to talk to you about something. is that okay?”

she nodded yet the look in her eyes clearly said she really didn’t want anything to do with him at all. “sure, do you want to step out for a bit?”

mark only noticed the stares of the customers at the pair of them when she glanced around the room, and he immediately nodded. the last thing he needed was for someone to recognize him and spread rumours (even though he knew that was practically unavoidable at this point—people were already starting to point). she took hold of his hand and led him out of the coffee shop, ignoring the incredulous whispers of everyone.

once they were outside, mark was the first to pull his hand away from her grasp in such a haste. he almost apologized when he saw the brief shock emerge in her face at the brash action, but at this point, he didn’t have time for games anymore — figuratively and quite literally, since he only had an hour left before taeyong and taeil will call the ceo on him.

“so what is it that you want to talk about?”

“i wanted to talk about us,” mark exhaled, finally feeling a weight being lifted off of his shoulders. he saw her face contort a little, obviously displeased at the topic. “i just — you gave your closure. but i didn’t.”

“mark, it’s been months,” she laughed, the sound coming out as breathless. “you still haven’t moved on?”

“how could i do that?” mark started laughing too, albeit humorlessly. he ignored the pang in his chest as he realized that she found the entire situation funny. “everything i see, everyone i talk to. everything reminds me of you. i can’t even do anything right, i can’t even live normally anymore, because i keep thinking, why? why did she break up with me? was i a bad boyfriend?”

“mark— no,” the smile on her face dropped. “you weren’t a bad boyfriend. i just—”

“then why did you tell me i had a change of heart?!” mark was enraged. he didn’t want to be angry. he didn’t mean to raise his voice like that. he didn’t mean to let his tears cascade down his cheeks. he probably looked so pathetic right now, practically seething at the image of himself, tears falling and eyes pleading for an answer, for anything. “i didn’t. i didn’t have a change of heart. if i did then i would have been the one who ended things. if i was such a good boyfriend, then why did you leave me? right when i needed you most?”

mark didn’t even let her open her mouth before he spoke up again, the pain in his voice raw. “i tried so hard. i’ve always tried so hard but you made me feel like i didn’t. i’ve always protected you from everything and everyone. i’ve always defended you. you made me feel like everything i’ve ever done, for myself, for you — they weren’t enough for you. i always thought that maybe i wasn’t good enough to make you stay. i guess i was right, wasn’t i?”

“i was scared,” she answered calmly. “i fell out of love with you and i didn’t want to admit that. it was my fault. all of it. i only said that so i wouldn’t feel terrible about leaving you but i didn’t realize it was too harsh of me to say that right away. i’m sorry, mark, for everything. please stop blaming yourself.”

mark only nodded, wiping at the tears that were on his cheeks and blinking away the ones that threatened to fall. he got what he wanted. he got the truth. he gave his closure. so why did it still hurt? why did it still pain him to see her, looking at him like he was the saddest, most pathetic person to ever exist? the pitiful stare she was giving him made mark feel so sick in the stomach that he had to look away so that the feeling won’t resurface.

“just know,” mark breathed out shakily, fingers trembling and aching to brush the stray hair that fell on her face aside. he bit the inside of his cheek to stop the urge until he tasted blood. “i still love you and i don’t think that will ever change. even if you hurt me. even if you broke my heart so bad to the point that i didn’t know if i’ll be fine by the end of it all. you became a part of my life no matter how bad it got in the end.”

“i love you too, mark,” she smiled warmly and mark knew she was lying straight to his face right now. but he didn’t care. it felt good, strange almost, to hear those words tumble out of her lips again. “i don’t want to leave you like this but i have to go now. i made some plans with a friend. maybe we can hang out together soon? i can call you?”

“it’s okay,” mark shook his head. “i’ll be busy anyways. enjoy your day. thank you for everything.”

he was pretty sure his friends had already deleted her number from his contacts (it was either johnny or donghyuck who did it). after this, he was going to back to the studio and suffer the consequences of his actions, he’d have to put up with the hyung line staring at him with disappointed glints in their eyes during the entirety of the car ride back home and donghyuck bombarding him with questions about what happened once the younger boy has cornered him somewhere in the dorm. but he wasn’t bothered or even annoyed that he’d be experiencing these things soon.

mark was about to turn away and find a taxi when a tall man approached them, his long arms soon snaking around her shoulder and pulling her into an embrace. mark was quite surprised but shook his head — he was going to stop caring about her from now on. whatever business this man had to do with her, he didn’t care.

“who’s this, babe?” the nickname caught mark off guard.

“hyunwoo,” she mumbled under her breath, obviously uncomfortable at the current situation. “this is mark. remember? i told you about him.”

“oh, the idol?” ‘hyunwoo’ turned his head to mark and the shorter boy nodded. “nice to meet you! i heard you’re quite acquainted with my girlfriend here. she told me a lot about you.”

“oh, girlfriend?” mark was surprised at the cool tone of his question. “well, yeah. i used to be quite close with her.”

“we’re not dating or anything,” she tried to laugh off, but the nervous glint in her eyes screamed otherwise. “i’m just friends with hyunwoo. it’s like what it looks like, mark—”

“it’s okay,” mark smiled warmly, looking at her then back at hyunwoo. “i don’t care who you date. it’s not like you owe me an explanation of any sort.”

“i—yeah, of course,” she mumbled to herself, looking down at the ground before looking back up at mark. “it was nice talking to you. we’ll get going now. keep in touch, okay?”

mark nodded and the warm smile on his face didn’t falter even for a second. after the two had walked away, mark stayed in the same spot. he didn’t miss the way the two shared a short kiss before hyunwoo opened the car door for her and helped her inside before hopping in the driver’s seat and driving away. once they were gone, mark’s phone began ringing, calls from taeyong flooding his missed calls.

mark only smiled to himself, pressing the call button on taeyong’s number while his eyes were still fixated on the spot where hyunwoo’s car was previously parked.

i’ll forget about you, someday.

#mark lee #mark lee imagines #mark lee prompt #mark lee angst #nct imagines #nct prompt #nct angst #nct #nct series #( writings )#out of all the parts i think mark's is the least sad #but it's still sad nonetheless

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neoniverse · 5 years ago

Text

heal me. | chapter II

disclaimer: this series is a work of fiction. any businesses, events or incidents are products of my wide imagination. all of the character’s personality does not reflect and has nothing to do in real life.

warnings: smut, angst, usage of strong language, mentions of death, alcohol & drugs, cheating issues and lots of flashbacks (read each chapter carefully)

pairings: jung jaehyun x reader

a/n: unedited ;)

« CHAPTER I / CHAPTER III »

“Hey, you still there?”

“Who’s this?”

The other line silenced—a brief pause. I’m certain it’s not him.

“Jaehyun.” I froze in my spot. Holy crap.

“And what’s the bouquet for, Mr. Jung?” I don’t even recognize my own voice, I’m agitated, again.

“I just wanted to express my gratitude.” His voice is so low, I can feel the depths of it pulling me. He sounds so cozy—alluring, to be honest. My breathing is slowing, almost hitching. I’m abruptly aware Johnny is staring at me, brows furrowed, I dart to my swivel chair and turned it around.

“It’s not like I did something honorable.” Stay calm, Y/N. Breathe.

“Hmm. Well, fortunately, I’m certain you did.”

“Thank you for the roses, Mr. Jung.” I’m all trepidatious—my traitor heart is abnormally beating.

“The pleasure’s all mine.” Oh hell, I can visualize the enticing gleam in his dark brown eyes. How can he make such four words titillate? He hang up. I turned around again, phone in the chest and eyes closed.

“I’m assuming there’s a comeback, yes?”

“Words, Johnny.” I snap. He laughed as if I just told him a funny joke.

But me and Jaehyun again? To hell with that. My feelings are too fragile, that being with him could even crush my heart into thousands of pieces. That’s how fragile my whole system is. I will never forget the day he chose to cheat on me.

Loving someone is so shallow that it could bring pain because you have to sacrifice something, but it doesn’t have to be always painful. You should also learn how to love yourself.

When I left him, I thought things will go better. I looked desperate, finding for solace to everyone’s arms after I lost Jaehyun, tons of projects, my interest in doing things I like and my mother. Her death is something I will always look back on because I wasn’t with her.

I lost her.

For the times that I also lost myself, Johnny had come to save my losing ass to the pit of darkness and loneliness. I’m so thankful for him even though he reminds me of Jaehyun.

I am restless that night, not paying attention and rolling in the sheets of my bed. Dreaming of something that will enliven myself and dark, deep unfathomed places. I woke up in the middle of the night, ended up watching the still, lit up busy city lights before crying myself back to sleep.

The first week of April went smooth and peaceful. I often see Jaehyun in the site but I decided to wait for him to leave so I could completely avoid him. Having Jaehyun close to me is something I never prayed for. I still hate his guts.

“How about we go to a nightclub after this and at least have some fun? You guys, especially Y/N, looks so exhausted as fuck.”

Johnny shouted in delight. “Damn, that’s what I’m talking about!”

Like what Architect Lee suggested, we went to a club that Johnny recommended. It was just a ten minute drive from the office.

“Ladies, this is my cousin Mark,” Johnny introduced the man who just came—probably in this twenties. His hair is ruffled jet black and he’s wearing white button-down dress shirt, sleeves are rolled up three-fourth. “Mark, this is Y/N, Seolhee and Rosé.”

“Architect Rosé Park.”

“Hi! I’m Architect Seolhee Lee!”

Mark extends his hand so I immediately placed my hand in his. He smiled and sat in the empty space of the black leather couch beside me.

Rosé offered me a shot of foreign alcohol, Jägermeister. She seems to be a party girl who knows a lot of things in alcoholic beverages. I drink, but I have to tolerate myself. For the last time I was drunk, I ended up sleeping in my bathtub because I kept going back to the bathroom.

We ended up finishing one bottle of Jägermeister and JD and two bottles of vodka before finding ourselves on the dance floor. The colorful lights strobed with the blasting music. I danced and danced until I felt someone staring at me.

I looked around to find the set of eyes who has been observing my every move, grind, and ruffling of hair. As I try to look for them on the dance floor, my eyes accidentally stayed in the second floor. I saw Jaehyun sitting in the black velvet couch, eyeing me as if I’m his prey. He drank the dark-colored liquid that was in his glass.

I rubbed my eyes and tried to look for him, again. He wasn’t there anymore.

The fuck?

“Y/N! Is that you?”

I promptly looked behind me and saw an unfamiliar person in front of me. My brows furrowed for a moment.

“Oh my god,” I exclaimed before hugging him. “Madexeus!”

He chuckled and tightened the hug. We moved away from the dance floor to sit on the high chairs placed before the bartender’s counter.

“2 glasses of my regular, please,” He told the bartender before looking at me. “Holy shit. Is that really you?”

I shrugged. “How long have you been here? It literally felt like ages since I last saw you.”

“Just came here for a short visit, though.” He passed a glass to me. “And I also heard what happened to your mother. I’m sorry.”

I gave him a short smile and drank the alcohol that felt like thousands of knives in my throat. The pain of losing my own mother is still in my heart, stabbed like a poisonous dagger.

“Thanks. I’m fine,” I lied. “It has been two years, already, Xeus. There’s no way I could never get over to that.”

“What are you doing for living now? Am I free to call you Doctor Y/N now?”

“Oh, that. I didn’t pursue it anymore. I’m an Engineer now, though!”

I’ll try to be happy, at least for my mother and not for anybody else.

“Well, are you sti-”

I was about to talk when someone gracefully dragged me from my seat. He lifted me up and placed my stomach to his shoulder like I’m a sack.

“What the fuck? Help!” I shouted and averted his hands from holding my legs in place.

“Shut your ass up or I will spank that.”

The voice is so manly, authoritative and dominant. There’s only one person I know who is pretty much likely to act like that. He opened the shotgun seat’s door before carefully putting me inside. I pushed myself more to the side of the door.

When he entered the car, we fell silent.

“Jaehyun, just bring me back insi-”

“No and I wont.”

“Why did you dragged me just like that, then?!”

“Who are you with? That ugly ass man or my cousin Johnny again?”

His left hand gripped the steering wheel while the other hand is behind my headrest. Jaehyun revived the engine before drifting away from the club’s valet parking. I looked at the buildings outside.

“Does it matter to you if I’m going out with one of them?” I softly whispered.

His eyes focused on the road.

“Are you avoiding me?” He scoffed. “Yeah, of course, you’re avoiding me.”

I remained my eyes to the buildings outside until Jaehyun pulled up somewhere unbeknownst to me. He removed his seat belt and went out. I rolled my eyes before following him.

He sat on the hood of the car and slid his hands to the pockets of his black slacks. I sat beside him, admiring the view of city lights.

“That night..” He heaved a deep sigh. “I was drugged by Chaewon. That’s why I wasn’t able to remember everything when you asked me.”

I remained silent.

Speechless.

“When.. did you know about this?” I asked, still looking straight at the view.

“A week after you moved out and left me alone, broken.”

He knew and he didn’t even bother to tell me even a single detail about it.

“Chaewon is my old secretary’s sister. I was out with my brother that time when my secretary was with her. She saw me and greeted us. Apparently, she knew me already that time but acted like she didn’t. I don’t remember the other things that happened after that. All I know is she’s the one who drugged me.”

Jaehyun stared at me and I locked gazes with him.

“I didn’t bother telling you since you already had Johnny beside you. I also heard from him that you lost your interest in Engineering when your mother died that’s why I asked him to make you back on track again. Because I know I won’t be able to do so.”

Fresh hot tears slowly streamed down to my cheeks, which made my heart clenched. I couldn’t stop the tremendous pain I’m feeling.

“I-I’m sorry,” I whispered.

He looked away, realizing what I said before moving closer to me. “Shh. Hey, love, it’s alright.”

“Jae, I’m sorry,” I said, softly. He cupped my face to wipe the tears.

Jaehyun didn’t answer. Instead, he held my head and pulled me. Making me lean on his chest. I bit my lower lip to cease my loud sobs.

That same night, Jaehyun drove me back to my penthouse. I dozed myself to sleep so I could at least escape from reality. The day after next, I visited the site to check the supplies if we ran out of something.

“Excuse me. Are you Engineer L/N?”

I looked behind me to see who called me when a man in dark blue button-down dress shirt, red necktie and dark blue slacks appeared in front of me.

“Yes, and you are?”

“Taeyong. May I ask if Jaehyun Jung is here?”

Jaehyun?

“He’s not yet here. Jaehyun often goes here at around 4 pm.” I answered while closing the folder I’m holding.

“Oh, yeah? Thank you, gorgeous.”

“Wait! Are you Jaehyun’s cousin? I can contact him if you want.”

He turned around again and removed his wayfarers.

“I’m his brother, Taeyong.” He winked. “It’s already quarter to four, maybe I could stay and wait for him here?”

I led him towards the office. When I opened the door, Johnny was scanning to some paperworks.

“Come on. It’s hot there, we have AC inside.”

He entered the room and silently sat on the black couch beside Johnny’s desk.

“Jae-” Johnny stopped. “Holy fuck, man!”

The Taeyong guy chuckled. “I knew you would be here, John. What’s up?”

Johnny sat on the single couch, still surprised.

“I’ll just go outside.”

I immediately went out afterwards. If he is Jaehyun’s brother, how come I haven’t seen him before?

“Hey.”

I almost fell on my feet when I heard Jaehyun spoke. He laughed. He was wearing a white button-down shirt, open at the collar and sleeves are rolled up, and gray slacks. His gray coat is hanging on his arm.

“Your brother’s inside,” I said, softly. His brows furrowed.

“My what?”

“Taeyong? Your brother?”

His jaw clenched and instantly opened the office door.

I stood behind Jaehyun and saw his brother grinning widely.

“Oh. Hey there, brother. Miss me?”

“What are you doing here?” Jaehyun authoritative asked. What’s with them?

He held my hand and pulled me closer to him.

“Woah. I won’t steal your lady. Right, gorgeous?” Taeyong looked at me. “Anyway, since you’re already here, come home tonight. Father’s asking for your presence at the family dinner.”

Jaehyun scoffed. “And if I won’t show up?”

“Oh, you would absolutely want to, dear brother.”

Taeyong went outside and walked towards his orange Lamborghini. Jaehyun made his way to his black Tesla and they both drove away from the site.

“What’s with them?” I asked Johnny. He just shrugged.

Another week has passed when I was invited to a charity event in Paris. I wore a simple maroon satin slip dress that ended just one inch below my knees and hugged my body well. Then I let my ash brown soft wavy hair down.

The whole event was so boring, it was all about business and that’s not even my field. I looked at the guests and all of them are known for being wealthy and leading capitals of fiscals or law firms. If not, most of them are either CEO or stockholders.

I finished the last faint brown-colored liquid in my wine flute in just one drink and stood up so I could leave the place quietly. I was about to exit peacefully when I bumped into someone’s shoulder, making me almost stumble on my own feet.

“We met again, gorgeous.”

I looked up to face the person and saw a familiar face— the owner of same playful grin.

“Allow me to introduce myself again and make up for my first bad impression to you,” He offered his right hand. “I’m Taeyong Lee.”

#nct #nct 127 #nct jaehyun #nct au #nct angst #nct smut #jung jaehyun au #nct fanfic #jaehyun angst #jaehyun smut #nct x reader #jung jaehyun #jaehyun x reader #jeong jaehyun #jaehyun fanfic

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jaehyunspeachparty · 5 years ago

Text

daddy jaehyun

ii.iv. (m)

warnings: smut wc: 3.247 a/n: okay this one is a little bit longer - again. Thats the reason why it takes so long. But now you have the update of the series aaaand it’s full of smut haha sorry not sorry ;)

Daddy Jaehyun Masterlist

"He has never really had the bottle. It could be that he will not sleep." You stood between door and corridor and just could not go. Jaehyun was already at the lift and rolled his eyes. "We also want to have a child soon, we have to get used to it anyway." Johnny and his girlfriend, with whom he has just moved together in a new apartment nearby, took care of Miga and Sunoh this night. Since you have had a second child, Johnny is completely in baby fever and now wants to become a father too. "And Miga can may be acting bitchy, especially when Sunho is whining." Somehow you could not quite tear yourself away. It would be the first night you will spend without your two children. "We'll do it, you really don’t need to worry." Johnny tries to calm you down and leans against the door. "Come on Y/N, the elevator is already here." Jaehyun called this to you and you finally take a step out of the apartment. "If anything happens, call me immediately." You look desperately into the room again, but then Johnny closed the door. A little sad, you go to your husband, who was finally able to get in the elevator. "Everything will be fine." Jaehyun took you in the arms and kissed your hair. "I know, but Sunho is still so small." You never thought that you would ever belong to the women who can’t live without their children. But after all, Sunho was only a few weeks old and only lived from your breasts. "You are no longer in puerperium and today is our anniversary. Let's just enjoy this night." Jaehyun was right. Everything has been all about your kids lately. Now it was time to take care of your relationship. For two weeks you already had the okay of your doctor that you can have sex again. Everything had formed back to normal. But your body has not been ready for sex until now, as you still felt a little bit of sore. But now you take the birth control pill again and slowly feel better in your body too. It was the perfect evening for it today. Jaehyun has reserved a table in a nice restaurant and then a suite in one of the best hotels in Seoul. He had really worked hard and you were very impressed. But you still could not switch off, the topic of your children at the dinner. You always have to think about Sunoh and Miga. "And on Wednesday we have to go to the paediatrician, because he gets a few more vaccinations. I hope it does not scare him." "Y/N, he is two months old, he will not remember." Jaehyun sighed and watched as you poke around in your salad. "Yes, but he is still so fragile." Now it was you who sighed and you take a bite. "You know I love our children, they are really wonderful. But can we forget today that we are parents?" Jaehyun looked at you with his dark brown eyes and put his hand on yours. He was right, because once again you had only thought of your duties as a mother. "I'm sorry, I don’t know why I suck on leaving the kids behind." You look up to your husband and smile slightly. "Because you are a good mother." It was a compliment that meant a lot to you and made you all red in the face. You were glad that Jaehyun saw everything so easily. "By the way, Johnny wants to propose his girlfriend next week." Jaehyun took a sip of his wine as he told you the news. "It's all very fast or?" A few months ago, Johnny was back in Chicago. Then he met his old childhood sweetheart and they fell in love again. She came to Seoul for a few weeks and now 4 months later they want to marry and have children. "I know, but I trust Johnny. He knows exactly what he's doing, and then somebody else is finally going to be a father too." You laugh and order, then another round. And you two done something this evening that you have not done in a long time - just talking about friends and about yourself.

After the meal, Jaehyun immediately took the hotel room key. Slowly you got nervous, but it was all so exciting. It was so long ago that you had sex and after the birth is the first time more difficult. After the birth of Miga, you had no idea that the first sex after would be so painful. You went to the thing pretty blue-eyed. But now you knew that it would not be so easy and that made you nervous. Many questions went through your head and your insecurity got bigger and bigger. When Jaehyun got the key, he came right to you. He looked unbelievably good that evening. He wore a black suit with a white shirt. His hair was styled backwards and black, with hardly comebacks lately, he didn’t have to dye them that often. "The suite is ready for us." He lifted the key card in the air. You smile and give him a kiss and when you wanted to break away from him, he did not let you go. "I hope you know you're driving me crazy with your dress." He whispers this in your ear and grabbed into your ass. You briefly gasp and look at him with wide eyes. It was all as intense and it felt as if you were alone in the hotel. You were sure people saw you, but you did not care. You just wanted to keep Jaehyun as close to you as possible. He smelled so good and his lips tasted incredible. Jaehyn called for the lift without letting you go. He pressed his lips on yours and his tongue played its own game in your mouth. When the elevator was there, he didn’t stop for a second and pushed you inside and against the wall. "Look what you do to me." He took your hand and put it in his crotch. You feel how his length was really hard and you start stroking over his bump. Jaehyun suppressed his moan as he devoted himself to kissing your neck. Goosebumps arose and your breaths grew louder. But then it rang, and you arrived on the top floor. Jaehyun took the key card, unlocked the door and opened his pants and that’s all between your kisses. You still could not see much of the suite, except that it was huge and all glazed. But before you could examine it further, Jaehyun already pulled you again to his body and distributed greedy other kisses on your neck. You reach back to his bump and rub over the fabric of his underpants. Jaehyun groaned again, but this time it was different. "Wait ... Stop ... fuck ..." And at that moment it was actually too late. You feel something wet and see how Jaehyun’s body twitched. "Did you cum?" It was very untypical for him, because otherwise he always had himself well under control. "Shit…yes." Somehow he was embarrassed. He ran his hand through his hair and his ears went red. "I mean, we probably had no sex for three months and you look so incredible good. I think I just could not wait for this here today." He broke away from you and looked ashamed to the ground. "I take that as a compliment. I mean, you still find me attractive after two children. You're surrounded by so many idols, stars and good-looking people. I'm just standard…a simple girl." Now it was you who looked down and Jaehyun was shook. "Do you really think so?" He came to you again and raised your chin with his index finger and thumb. "Do you think I'm so superficial that I'm just blinded by looks, do you think that of me?" Jaehyun looked deep into your eyes and you were completely frozen. He was right, but so much was going on in your body that he would never understand your thoughts. "I don’t want to blame you. Only, you must understand it best. If you're surrounded by beautiful people all the time, that you're under pressure yourself, and in addition to that, after just two kids, my body is just a bit deformed and I thus have another vulnerability. " Tears gathered in your eyelids and you knew it was just the hormones that made you so sad. "Hmm ... okay, I can understand it somehow. But I don’t think like that. I don’t care about the others, okay? It's just important to me that you know that you are the most beautiful woman of the world to me and that I really love you." "I love you too." You lean you head more to him and give him a soft kiss. It was good that you talked about it. After the whole thing with his ex-girlfriend Suji, who works with him again in the company, it builds up a lot of thoughts inside you. "Come, I'll make you feel good." He took your hand and led you to the bed.

His lips were back on your neck and with his figurines he reached for the zipper of your dress. You got cold for a moment when he pulled the fabric over your shoulders. Although his touch was not new to you, your body was filled with excitement. For a long time, you have not had this time for each other, just to touch you. Jaehyun started everything very slowly. He took off your dress very carefully and spread a trail of kisses over the places where your skin was covered with the fabric before. When he took off your bra, he began to groan. You never liked your breasts when you were breastfeeding, because they were always very blue because of the big veins. But Jaehyun just only saw that they were big and plump. He begins to stroke the outside of your breasts. With a flat hand he started to massage you. His fingers brush gently over your nipples and you feel that it triggered something in you. At some point he placed a few kisses between your breasts and squeezed them a little so that his face was dented by it. You hear a grunt and feel how he continues to walk down with his mouth. He pulls off the rest of your dress and plays with the waistband of your panties. "We start very slowly okay?" He smiled as he pulled the last fabric down. It was all very strange, as if you had your first time. So many times have you slept with Jaehyun. During the first months of your relationship you went hardly out of the bedroom. But now you were nervous and Jaehyun realized that. He carefully placed you in the middle of the bed and also took off his shirt. "You hardly train anymore, how can you still have such a six-pack?" You laugh and stroke his skin. "Miga keeps me fit." He smiled and gave you a kiss. And that kiss lasted longer again. You almost forgot what a good kisser Jaehyun was. It was always magical, because his lips were so soft and his tongue was so gently wrapped around yours. As you dwell in the kiss, you feel Jaehyun placing two fingers between your folds and stroking them along. You startle, because you were not sure how sore you were. "Relax, I promise I'm very careful." Jaehyun's eyes were serious and you nod. After all, you trust him. And you thought he would continue with his fingers, but you were wrong. Jaehyun now moves down on you. Put his head in front of your pussy and spread your legs. You look down at him in astonishment, but then try to lean back and relax, how he said. And then you feel his breath in your most intimate area. With his fingers he stroked over your folds and spread them apart. And suddenly you feel the light pressure of his tongue on you. It was cold for a moment, but then you get used to his temperature. Jaehyun's tongue played with your clit and you had to say one thing, he had not forgotten how to lick. His tongue was just pure magic and sometimes you asked yourself how he could do it. He was gentle, but at the same time he exerted the perfect pressure on your clit, so you feel that incredible feeling in your whole body. Previously, you could always come right away if Jaehyun satisfied you orally, but this time you were too tense. You had read about it the last days and learned that it is very unusual to get an orgasm the first time after birth. But it was not important for you to cum in this evening. Jaehyun always brought you to climax the other times anyway. Jaehyun devoted himself to your pussy for a long time, but then he looked up and smiled at you. "I think you're ready or? I mean, I think I've prepared you quite well." With his fingers, he stroked over your swollen clit and at the same time leaned towards you again. "Yes? You think so?" You joked and pull him to your face to give him a quick kiss. "I don’t just think that, I know! Your pussy is so wet for me." He also kissed you briefly and then he straightened up again. He got rid of his last garments and positioned himself in front of you. "But you also make me incredibly hard." He put his length on your lower abdomen. You feel like his cock was full of blood and thus hit hard against your skin. "Wow I forgot how big he can become." You look anxiously down to you. From the outside it looked so unrealistic. His hard length lay on your lower abdomen and his tip reached almost to your belly button. "You've had him in you so many times inside you. I can assure you, he fits." Jaehyun laughed and leaned down to you. "I penetrate you very slowly and you just say if it hurts, is that okay?" He looks deep into your eyes and you nod to his question. Jaehyun stayed down by you, his eyes rested on yours and you feel his tip pressed very carefully against your entrance. "Ok, I'm starting now. I'm very gentle." He smiled soft and stroked through your hair. With big eyes you look up to him and try to relax. When he started to fill you slowly, you realize that it was a bit uncomfortable. But it also felt good and a weird mix of feelings evolved. "Everything okay?" Jaehyun asked as he was completely inside of you. Your eyes were still big and everything felt very special. You could not describe the feeling to yourself. "Yes, it does not hurt." You smile and bury your fingers in his skin. "Don’t worry. I'll be very slow today, it's just about you." Before you could say anything, his lips were back on yours and it ended again in a wonderfully long kiss. Meanwhile, Jaehyun began to move a bit inside you. He just pulled his dick out a bit and slowly pushed him back into you. In the beginning you were still tense and your fingers were still tight around his forearm, but with more movement, you became more relaxed. Your fingers relaxed and you start to moan softly. As you become more vocal, a smirk was on Jaehyun's face. "Does it feel good?" His pace remained constant while he watched you. "Yeah, that's good," you moan further and feel how the small movements were getting more intense. Before, you had never tried slow sex, but it had its appeal. It was so intimate, and it was so extraordinary, because you have not had that much time for sex for a long time. It passed many minutes and you get more and more accustomed to the feeling of his cock inside you. Although you did not come to your orgasm, but you were close. Jaehyun's movements were still soft and slow. You both enjoy your togetherness and it was just nice to hear your moaning and breathing. "I'm close, can I fuck you a little faster?" You knew that Jaehyun needed it harder and faster. But you thought anyway that you were ready for more. “Yes.” You clasp Jaehyun's forearms again and look up at him. He was still bent over you and you notice him slowly increasing his pace. "Fuck, you feel so good." Jaehyun groaned and his breath became heavier. With the increasing speed his breath became heavier. You try to relax, but it hurt a little. However, you did not want to take his climax and try to relax even more. His grunt grew louder and then he straightened up, pulled his dick out of you and finished himself on your stomach. You had to say that this picture was very hot. He looked so tall and powerful, with his cock in his hand. His cum sprayed all over your upper body and when Jaehyun was done, he took a deep breath. He was out of breath and his body was sweating. "How do you feel?" He lay down beside you and took out of the bedside table tissues. He stroked them gently over your stomach and wiped you free from his orgasm. "It was so good. Thank you for being so patient." You turn to him and smile at him gently. “For me it is important that you liked it." You did not have to say anything, you simply kissed him, showing him how great he was, how gentle he was, what a wonderful husband he was. "I love you so much." With these words, you finish your kiss and sit up. "I love you too." His eyes rested on yours and he gently touched the tips of your fingers. The rest of the evening you could only end with a bath. The suite requested an open bath overlooking the skyline. You two spent a while in it, chatting and touching. But in the end you were young parents and sleep was slowly becoming a foreign word for you.

It was the first night in a long time, when you finally could sleep through. For a long time you had not felt so relaxed. You have ordered breakfast in the room and enjoy it once in bed to eat. But then it was time and you had to slowly check out of the hotel. "I know that sounds bad and I love our kids so much, but I wish this could take even longer." You sigh and looked one last time in the suite. Jaehyun came up to you and put his hands on your hips. "I feel the same way, maybe we should do that more often?" Jaehyun smiled and kissed you gently again. But during your kiss, his hands moved down to the hem of your dress and his fingertips starting to touch the fabric of your panties. "Jaehyun, we have to check out." You look at him with wide eyes. "We have 10 minutes left." With these words he grabbed you and carried you back to bed.

Daddy Jaehyun Masterlist

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aesjae · 7 years ago

Text

Boyfriend! Mark

#6 of Boyfriend! Series

Word Count: 2,214 ( yea i got carried away... again... hahahaa) Style/ Genre: Series-- Headcanon Date Posted: 17 Sept 2017

i feel so emotional just thinking about how we watched mark gradually grow up since the smrookies days

i mean he matured so much :”)

okay but anyways

for mark, i would take into the assumption that mark is an idol while he is your boyfriend (which would be different from other members)

i’m just going to comment on this first

mark is the epitome of perfecting the concept of duality man

okay let’s get on to it

just like jeno, he would be one of the sweetest boyfriends among all the nct members

and just like jaehyun, he would be extremely dorky

but the sweetness and dorkiness from mark would be different from other members

he would elude a different and unique aura in every aspect of him

like that mark boy video where he does cherry bomb and we young choreography?

yep just like that

with mark being your boyfriend

you would be able to see completely new sides of him as compared to when you were merely his friend

he would be really manly in terms of protection and would always stand up for you

if somebody teased you about something

a text to mark and he would zoom right to where you were

oh but if you were shorter

the only teasing he would not protect you from is those about your height

he would probably chide the other person off for attacking someone smaller than them

but when both of you walk away

he would rest his arm on your head, snickering

bUT ACTUALLY

he would just be dorky and adorable most of the time

the manly side he had was more of an exterior

because when he's with you

he melts

literally

because some people are worth melting for ;)

he would become this really fluffy soft ball

it's was as if there was a hidden teddy bear spirit in him

but we all know marks an actual teddy bear so

in front of the dreamies

he's like this very independent and reliable leader and elder

even though he gets attacked by all of them every time

he would be firm about his decisions and instructions

but when it comes to you

he wouldn't even be able to bring himself to be as firm

let's say both of you were on a smoothie date

and you begged mark for you to get another glass

mark would obviously be aware that you shouldn't be drinking so much sugar

but the way you asked of him just made his heart go pudding and liquidy

he would part his lips in protest because he cares about your health

but then the sparkles in your eyes in anticipation of his approval just grasp onto his heart like

‘bOY UR GURL IS BEGGING YOU’

and mark’s just like

"h- .... haish, fine."

and when you actually get your second glass of smoothie

mark would feel so elated looking at your blissful expression??

and when you just sip on your smoothie like an excited little child

internally he would be like "i'm so glad i fell in love with this angel here??"

and he would actually be shocked with himself because he had never told you that he had loved you yet

since it had only been a few months into your relationship

yet that thought popped up so effortlessly and unconsciously

since mark is an idol in this boyfriend!,

he would actually be quite busy

especially since he is in 3 subunits, and also has individual activities

he may not be able to reply to your texts or voice/ video call you very often

but whenever you start spamming him with messages and raving over his latest comeback/ activity

with tons of emojis and sound effects

they never fail to put a wide grin on his face

seeing you being so excited like a puppy gives him more reason to persevere on

even though being an idol was tough

you gave him courage and motivation to carry on his a smile on his face

whenever during fanmeets/ fansigns/ lives

and a fan mentions your name

that particular comment would capture his whole attention

and a faint blush would instinctively start tainting his cheeks

they weren't v bright but were obvious enough for his members and fans to start teasing him about

there would definitely be some fans who wouldn't be happy about your relationship with him

and even though he really loved all of his fans

mark would be quite upset about the hate you were getting from some of the fans

he would probably take a protective stance for you

making a public statement (maybe in an interview or smthg) that he understands that not everybody would be satisfied with his relationship with you, but he wouldn't be able to satisfy everyone, hence, the only person he would focus on making happy in this affair, is you.

and that would really touch you tbh

you knew that mark was a sensitive person

but he was very strong willed

so if he had to make such a statement against certain fans of his

he must've really treasured his relationship with you

it was this that made you develop even stronger feelings for mark

even when mark wasn't in a relationship with you yet, he composed amazing lyrics

so when he became attached to you, wow i shit you not,

every single song and lyrics he wrote would be like hITTING THE CHARTS

he would dedicate most of his songs and lyrics that he wrote to you

constantly thanking you for the continuous and never-ending support you provided him with

and for always staying by his side even though he wasn't able to physically stay by your side every time

the songs and lyrics would be so pure

and they resonated the innocent and truly authentic feelings he had for you

when mark finally has a break from activities,

he would usually spend most of his days with you

on some of the days, maybe just relaxing with you either at home or in the dorms

uall can go from a lazy day full of cuddling on the couch and literally just doing nothing but lying down beside each other

to hardcore jamming to different tunes

dancing around the house/ dorm like mad people

to just sincere acoustic playing of instruments and singing

mark’s vocals weren’t the best

but whenever he sang

his mellow and soulful voice warmed your heart

and when he looked directly into your eyes as he sang

your insides just start to do their thing

like flip flop backflip somersault cartwheel forward backward rolls

and when he rapped

it gave you completely different feelings

mark would be brimming with charisma while rapping

a distinctively different aura as compared to mark singing

and you feel your blood pulsating with adrenaline

feeling yourself getting sucked into his endless charms

whether or not you were musically inclined,

mark would really enjoy making music with you

like sharing his passion with the love of his life?

wOw he would have never felt so blessed

it was as if reality was a dream ( dream is reality )

yea but the majority of mark’s dreams had you in them

on some of the days of his break spent with you

both of you would go out and do various kinds of activities

maybe zoo dates with mark

oh that’d be realllyyyyyy fun

“oH MARK YOUR COUSINS”

mark: ???????

you: *points to the monkeys in their enclosure and grins like a fool*

mark: *wants to facepalm both himself and you but can’t help but chuckle at how adorable you look*

“mARKEU why can’t you be as tall as the giraffes like johnny :-( then i can get a piggyback from you and be tall toooo”

“i’M NOT THAT SHORT” said mark as the tips of his ears turned red

“my gem, your dear maknae is already taller than you.”

“naw.”

“what.?”

“naw.”

“why do i like you, you dork.”

“hhehehehehe”

uall would be legit kids at the zoo

being so excited and literally jumping around everywhere to the point that even children around started staring at the both of you

but neither mark nor you were bothered by the stares anyway

because both of you were having so much fun with each other by your sides

you and mark would go busking on the streets or at the park sometimes too, just for the fun and enjoyment

it might have been a bit embarrassing for you at first since you weren’t used to performing in public

but mark reassured you that it would be a worthwhile and thrilling experience the first time uall busked

and it was

uall would have a large crowd around the both of you

mark with his guitar and you singing ( or playing any instruments that you know or any other talents )

everybody would be singing along to the well-known songs mark and you performed

and tbh, busking along with mark really gathered even more support from fans and the public for both of your relationship

idk why i got carried away by this idea but i think that you being in a relationship with mark would really bring out the best of you, and let you try many different things that you have never tried before

furthermore, i think busking with mark would be a really memorable experience haha

mark would L O V E your hugs and kisses

like ASDFGHJKL

he would be stunned whenever you abruptly attacked him with hugs and kisses and he may momentarily tense up

but afterward, he would melt completely into your arms

instead of smooches or something lmao, i think he would prefer pecks

short, quick pecks that would really cause you to feel like a monster was gnawing on your insides

the briefness of his kisses would tease you as you craved for more

but mark would usually turn around and walk away after he had pecked you all of a sudden

because he knew what his pecks did to you and he absolutely loved to tease you

mark would have constantly sent you on the edge of loving him even more

the first time he verbally said the 3 sacred words to you

would be on christmas day one year

both of your families would gather together for christmas dinner

and after dinner both of you would head to the backyard

lying down beside each other on the snow

silently enjoying each other’s comfortable accompaniment while making snow angels

christmas lights would decorate the backyard

and decorative lights from the neighbours’ houses would also make the whole of the surroundings a magical sight

you would turn your head to the side

only to catch mark already staring at you with an inexplicable expression on his face

his eyes twinkling under the christmas lights and a blissful smile tugging at the ends of his lips

and suddenly he would turn his body towards you and prop his head on his palm, never breaking eye contact with you

and he would really just go

“i swear to god, i love you so much.”

and it would have taken you by surprise

because you definitely weren’t expecting that

and you would feel your face getting really heated up despite the cold

you felt really shy hearing those words come out of mark’s mouth, but you wouldn’t be able to turn away from his intense but soft gaze

and you would just continue staring at him, not knowing what to do

you would expect mark to be really shy and flustered after saying ily to you, but he never once looked away or diverted his eyes

for you only saw sincerity in his eyes, only noticing then the passion of his love burning like a crackling fireplace in his beautiful hazel orbs

and this tight clenching of your heart would overwhelm you

and you couldn’t resist but say the 3 words back to him

and at that moment, once the words had left your lips

your heart would feel so elevated, so light

because you had finally said it

and jpg mark would finally come back to life

his eyes and eyebrows rising so high up as a bright, resounding laughter reverberated out from his lungs

his elbow would slip as his mind processed the reciprocated words

and his head would plop into the thick snow as he continued giggling like a fool

and then he would turn back to you, leaning much closer to you this time

and just giving you an actual kiss on the lips

not a short and quick peck anymore, but one that lasted for at least a few seconds

one that filled your heart with warmth to the brim, warmth that was so great it made you completely forget about the chilly weather

because both of you had finally said your “i love you”s, and tbh that was the best moment in your life for you

because under the magic of the christmas lights, under the magic of being madly in love, you had never felt more blissed to have met someone

that someone who was mark lee minhyung

the best person you could ever ask to love

I HOPE UALL LIKED THIS ♥︎

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