#that i've said anything when i try to talk about it or share anything related to it

[arctic-reptile]

sent my fanzine pieces to some friends and most didn't acknowledge them at all and the only one who did just went "nice" and nothing else :(((

[obae-me]

Human Things that Confuse the Non-Humans

I've seen a lot of headcanons on my feed recently that are all about demonic traits and things that seem to scare or facinate MC, but what about the opposite? So I was wondering what sort of typical human things might either unsettle the non-humans, confuse them, or enchant them in some way.

Most of these are based off of personal heasdcanons I already have, so it's very self indulgent.

If ya'll have any other ideas, feel free to share, I'd love to hear them.

Also not proof read cuz I'm writing this at like 5 am due to sleep issues.

------

Circadian Rythem. I've always wanted to bring up how I headcanon that the Devildom doesn't even follow a 24 hour schedule, since the 24 hour thing is entirely based around the sun, and since they don't have a sun, it makes sense that days would follow some other set rule (I always think that Devildom days are much much longer, hence why MC is caught so many times in canon just taking naps wherever even when Belphie is not around), but that's a headcanon for another time. Anyways, I think the fact that Humans almost need to follow a certain sleeping schedule would totally confuse the demons. Demons only really sleep to stay at their strongest, it's not as vital to them. And the fact that humans can die if they don't get the proper sleep? Totally freaks them out. If MC ever pulls an all-nighter, they all think they're one foot in the grave. Having Solomon and MC getting naturally sleepy more often than the non-humans do might seem pretty adorable at times though.

The fact that human hair does indeed shed. I don't personally think demon or angelic hair would, I feel like hair is something they can change at will within reason (There is a chat with Mammon about him getting his haircut, but he said he was going to change it, so I like to think he made it grow back instantly and cut it like normal again). So I like to think that MC or Solomon leaving strands of hair behind is shocking, because the non-humans only ever associated that trait with animals, but they also find it weirdly cute in a way. The demons and angels do try to ask to comb or brush Solomon's and/or MC's hair from time to time. They feel like they're helping.

Being able to roll (curl? Fold?) your tongue. I think it would be hilarious if despite the millions of other things demons and angels can do, none of them can roll their tongues. And then they get confused too when they discover that not every human can do it either, just certain ones. Solomon can do it and treats it like a party trick.

Allergies. I don't know if it's said in Canon anywhere that demons and angels can have allergies...I hope not because (as much as it sucks) it would make sense for it to just be a human thing. Just the concept entirely would have the non-human's heads spin. What do you mean certain things can just have your body essentially attack itself? And it's different for every human? It can be quite literally anything? (The non-humans would absolutely have a heart attack if they knew about mine)

Human mimicry. I think we as humans just have a natural instinct to mimic or repeat certain things. It's a lot more noticeable with internet culture and memes and references and things, but I think a very human thing to do is repeat or mock things we come into contact with. For example, if we hear an animal noise, we try to repeat it like we're talking to it. If we see something in a weird position, we might try to pose like it, etc. We try to relate to things, which is why personification is so prominent in everything we do. (Like how some of us tell wobbily objects to stay or loud machines to shut up) The non-humans think this is very cute. They don't really do that. The closest thing they might relate to is a current trend, but those pass by rather quickly. Mammon probably thinks we're almost like a bunch of crows.

Emotional control/suppression. Hear me out. It's well known in canon that the brothers blow up easily. They'll fight someone over miniscule things. Even Lucifer, who says he prides himself on his control, loses his temper quite often. And Mammon, while seemingly the best at controlling anger, is very open about all his other emotions. The only two demons that clearly have the best control overall are Barbatos and Diavolo who are the two most powerful demons in the Devildom. It probably takes so much energy and power to keep themselves in check. We hardly ever see that dark aura around them if at all in the game, which seems to give the two this unspoken common respect. As for angels, it was already mentioned once that the angels do have magical methods forcibly controlling emotions, and despite that, I'm sure it takes ages of training and practice to get to the level of "patient perfection" they're supposed to exhibit. Now, humans aren't perfect, and of course, there's a lot of nuance to this like mental illness I won't get into, but generally speaking, we quickly learn how to regulate our emotions or how to supress them for society's sake. At the very least, when we get angry we dont suddenly get surrounded by a dark shadow or shift into a different form. And I like to think this terrifies the non-humans to a degree. They don't know when humans are angry or upset until it's blatantly obvious. They already are off-put by Solomon because they never really know what he's up to. And what if it's not even because he's doing "weird" things, what if it's just because he seems to be so calm all the time and no one knows how to read him? None of them know how to read human body language. There's no aura to see, no puffed up wings, no glowing eyes, no whipping tails. Humans can just...stand there, sometimes with a blank expression, sometimes just staring. It can give even the stronger willed beings the creeps. Bonus points if MC is great at masking too. You mean humans can just...take extreme emotions and tuck them away for later? I'm sure that's an absolutely wild concept. Most of the non-humans are just not capable of that kind of control. Albeit its not always the healthiest option, but just the fact that humans have the willpower to just sometimes choose or force themselves not to feel at all is Barbatos level intimidating.

[billthedrake]

BIG SKY

I won't lie to you and tell you that I've never perved on my brothers, but with Keith I managed to keep the lust in check. But objectively, my older, middle brother is a hunk. Even as I walked past security at the regional airport and saw him standing there waiting for me, I was struck by how attractive he was. 6-foot-even in casual summer clothes with a build that looked almost wiry-lean at first but was super solid when you got closer.

"Alex!" he called out to me to catch my attention. Then stepping up to meet me in a quick bear hug he added in a more normal voice. "So good to see you, bro."

OK, I mostly felt that normal fraternal affection and his excitement was rubbing off on as he clapped my lats through my polo shirt and I felt his own taut bod underneath some faded National Parks T-shirt he had on. At least I hoped his excitement was rubbing off on me. I was low-key dreading this trip and not so low-key resenting how much even the air ticket out west was costing me mid-summer, not to mention my share of the lodging costs.

Seeing Keith happy made it worth while. "Glad you could make it," he said, giving my shoulder a playful squeeze, as if we were still in high school and as if I weren't not taller than him. "I know it's not your thing."

I shrugged. I promised I wasn't gonna be an ass this week. I knew this meant a lot to Keith and to be honest I was glad and a little impressed he wasn't doing the typical Vegas thing, or even the typical Nashville thing. Keith loved the outdoors, so his buddies planned a week of fly fishing and light hiking in big sky country.

"Come on, Keith," I objected. "I'm glad to be here."

It was the right answer, but my brother couldn't help but tease me. "Dude, your idea of nature is Central Park." I had a carry-on that I knew how to efficiently pack, so we didn't need to wait for bags. I followed my brother's lead out toward the exit.

In addition to not being an ass, I had two related goals for the week: one, dial down the bitchy gay humor. I mean, I don't think of myself as bitchy or queeny or whatever, but I know these guys probably do, and I lived enough in the Midwest to know how my normal wit comes across.

And two: have fun.

"Look at you expanding my horizons," I said. Then as we stepped outside the doors, I saw a vista of the Rockies in the background. "Fuck, that's beautiful," I muttered.

Keith smiled, amused at my big city reaction maybe but I think also enjoying that I liked it here.

We got in his rental car and were on our way.

"You didn't have to pick me up," I said as I took in the scenery that unfolded in front of us, flat but also majestic.

"No need for everyone to get a car," he said. He gave a quick glance over at me. "I'm really happy you came, Alex," my brother said in that sincere tone of his that used to drive me crazy - I don't know it sort of seemed West Coast people talk super earnest about every fucking thing - but now it hit me in a certain emotional place. I felt bad that I even considered for a moment saying no to this trip.

"Of course," I replied. "Big step for you and Rebecca."

He grinned. "It is," he said. "We were taking our time, not rushing anything you know, and then all of a sudden, we weren't taking our time," he chuckled.

"It'll be great," I said. "You're a great couple."

He nodded and shot me another look. "What about you, bro? Anyone in your life these days?"

I wouldn't say I was the black sheep of the family, but whereas Keith and Mike were close with each other and close with our parents, I had established some distance.

"Nah," I replied. I about tossed out some bitchy-witty comment, but reminded myself that I was going to be a new Alex Miller this week. "I've been trying to date more seriously, actually," I admitted. "But that shit's hard."

Keith smirked. He was always the supportive brother. Whereas Mike could be the typical ex-jock, Keith had a protective streak about his kid gay brother. Still, he was sometimes amused by the differences between gay and straight life. "How so?" he asked.

"Man, I need a couple of drinks in me before I start in on that," I said.

"Fair," Keith replied. Maybe we weren't that different.

We drove for a bit more in silence before Keith spoke up again. "Listen Alex, I wanted to thank you again for showing us around New York on last visit. We had a blast, and it meant a lot to Rebecca, I know."

I muttered a thanks. I mostly was enjoying the big sky country unfolding ahead of us as Keith drove us to the place where we'd rented a couple of cabins for the week. But, yeah, I couldn't help but sneak glances at my big brother, looking hot as fuck as he relaxed in the driver's seat. Keith very much had the body I was working for - muscular but lean. I got annoyed with how straight guys made that kind of body seem effortless, though in reality, I knew they put in the work, too.

***

Mike was Mike. Pushing 40 and looking very much like the high school football coach he was - 6'3" with 230 pounds that was a combo of solid muscle and some married spread, including a slight beer belly that filled out the Ohio State T-shirt he had on.

"Alex!" his voice boomed as I stepped into the cabin. I set down my bags as he got up off the couch, where he'd been watching the Cubs game. "Guess the party's starting now," he laughed.

If Keith was the sincere, serious one of the Miller brothers and I was the wry, cynical one, Mike was happy-go-lucky one, like an overgrown kid who still hadn't gotten used to adulting. Even if we shared a lot of genetics, Mike looked the most midwestern, with fine, pale brown hair and a strong stockiness, and a booming Midwestern accent.

I felt his big body clasp mine and I could smell the body wash on him and feel the heat from his build. If I kept my lust for Keith well repressed, I hadn't been able do the same with Mike. We had a complicated history and the fact I'd sucked his meaty cock before made compartmentalizing that much harder.

"I'll let you guys get settled in," Keith said. "Dinner up at the big cabin in an hour?" he added. "But feel free to come up earlier if you want. We'll just be hanging out."

I got settled into my room and freshened up. The place we'd rented wasn't cheap, but it was pretty damn nice, I'll admit, and Mike and I had our own rooms in the smaller, secondary cabin, while the best man Ben and the other two groomsmen Ian and Nathan were sharing the larger cabin with Keith.

Mike was popping open a beer can when I stepped back into the main open living/kitchen area. "Vodka's in the freezer for you," he said. "Picked up your brand."

"Thanks," I said. Vodka-soda was my go-to, but after the long travel day, a martini sounded perfect. "You must think I'm a picky bastard," I said, half in self-deprecation.

Mike grinned. "Oh, I KNOW you're a picky bastard," he said, taking a sip of his beer. "It shows on your face every time your back home."

I shrugged. He had me there.

"How are things back home?" I asked, pulling out the vodka and the chilled rocks glass my brother had put in for me.

"Same ol, same ol," Mike said. "Cat and I are getting divorced," he said bluntly, like he wasn't dropping a bombshell."

"Jesus!" I exclaimed, setting my glass down on the counter. "Really?" then seeing his nod, "Fuck."

He gave a shrug but I knew my big brother was an emotional wreck beneath his boisterous personality. "Technically it's a separation. But writing is on the wall."

"How are Emily and Jase taking it?" I asked, referring to his kids, my niece and nephew.

"Fine," he said, blue eyes looking at me intently. "Maybe. I don't know, A."

"We don't gotta talk about it," I said.

"Thanks," Mike said reaching forward to clasp my shoulder and giving it a strong squeeze. It was friendly and brotherly and flirty at the same time. "I don't mind you knowing, bro, it's just some things can't be fixed, you know?"

"Yeah," I replied. His hand didn't leave, nor did his gaze relent. I lowered my voice. "You want some head, don't ya Mike?"

He gave a shy grin before his face grew bedroom serious. "It's all I've been thinking about since Keith told me you were coming."

I felt my throat tense up. I hadn't expected sex, not this soon, but the thrill of sucking my coach brother off was getting to me. "What about the other guys?" I asked.

His voice grew sultry. "I'll keep watch, A. Just work your magic. Please."

Before I had a chance to agree or to crouch down, Mike was leaning in. He was a little buzzed from the beer, but I loved his combination of relaxed and excited as we swapped tongues. This wasn't a first for us, but it was new territory, something we'd tried when we stole off surreptitiously last Christmas.

Even as we kissed I could feel him reach down, undoubtedly pulling down his shorts. "Please, A," he grunted into my mouth.

I nodded. Giving a quick look out the window.

"They're not coming to check on," Mike said with some horny exasperation. "Just suck my cock, man."

I wasn't sure I liked my brother in bossy mode, but I was into the naughty thrill of this. I crouched down and took a second to admire this hard tool. We had similar cocks, if I had to measure I was probably a half inch longer, while Mike Miller had about a half inch of extra girth. I ran my hands up his furry legs - if his middle had a softness, the legs were all hard muscle. I leaned in and traced my tongue up from the base.

"Fuck yes," he hissed. The tone was now appreciative and begging rather than commanding. Pariticularly as I teased the shaft some, wetting my big brother down before I craned my head up to position my mouth over his leaking head.

I tasted that sap, then the saltiness of his prick, as I went down on him. I'm not an OnlyFans expert at giving head, but I'm good enough. Even without his telling me, I knew I gave the best blowjobs my oldest brother ever had.

"Holy Christ, bro... yeah, just like that." I felt his fingers grip my head. Not roughly, more cradling my temples to encourage me as I went up and down.

I frickin loved my brother's dick. It's meaty and just enough of a challenge without being too much. I relaxed my jaw and willed my throat to cooperate as I began deep throating him at a good clip. Working up and down with long mouth strokes, feeling the thick rigidity in his bone spear my gullet in rhythmic succession. It's the kind of vigorous cocksucking that I can't kepe up for a long session, but I knew I wouldn't have to.

"Oh FUCK, Alex! FUCK!"

I felt the quiver of that hard cock and was being fed a healthy appetizer of pent-up sperm. I adjusted my sucking pace to milk out that load without overstimulating him.

"Oh shit," I gasped as I pulled off. I had a healthy sex life but brother sex was some of the hottest and made me feel like a starved man. "That was hot, Mike."

I looked up and saw a look of pure sexual contentment and gratitude. "Bro... you're the fucking best. Seriously."

I mean, I kind of knew that, at least in comparison to Mike's wife or his past girlfriends. But I liked seeing him happy and knowing I'd put him in that state. It was fucked up.

"Stand up," he urged softly. But Bossy Mike was gone and it was his normal buddy tone of voice.

That only made me more willing to do as he asked. I stood up, hardon aching. We'd done this before, maybe a half dozen times over the years. Sometimes I jerked off in Mike's presence after I'd sucked him off. I wanted to now, so I started undoing my shorts.

I got the surprise of my life to see my big stud brother kneel down. Right there in the kitchen of the rental cabin.

"Oh shit, Mike," I grunted. "Are you gonna?"

He didn't really answer. He just flashed a smile before his face got closer to my hardon. And before I knew it was feeling my brother's tongue on my dick.

It took me a second to even think. I looked out the window. The coast was clear. I absolutely didn't want anyone to walk in on this. But I also enjoyed the fact Mike was blowing me out here in the open.

I touched his skull like he had mine. Gentler, even, since I didn't want to spook him. Mike was better at this than I thought. Wisely, he didn't try to take too much dick in. Holding the base of my cock he worked the top in steady sucking motions. It was gonna work, all right. I was already turned on like crazy.

"Mike... I'm gonna..."

His lips and tongue worked me faster and he hummed around my prick. Then as I felt the first shot fire out into his mouth, he raised up off my dick and rapidly stroked out the rest of my cum. I fired a good five or six heavy jets, right on to Mike's handsome face, and splotching that Ohio State shirt stretched over his meaty body.

"Yeah... stud..." he encouraged, his blue eyes wide as he watched the last of my ejaculation.

I was breathing hard now and my dick twitched, even after Mike let go of it and stood up. I watched him pick up his beer and take a healthy swig. "I fucking hate the taste of cum," he announced, before taking another sip to wash the flavor away. "I don't see how you swallow, Alex."

I shrugged. "I don't know... it's the best part." I felt throughly drained, and yet the sight of my hunky big bro dripping with my semen was going to keep my boned.

Mike got self conscious all of a sudden and grabbed a napkin off the counter to wipe his cheek and chin of my seed.

The reality was sinking in. "That wasn't your first dick," I said softly.

He grinned. "I've been fooling around with one of my players. Graduated senior now. Yeah, yeah, I know that's dumb as hell."

It was my turn to reach forward and pat his arm. "Maybe. But it's hot as fuck."

That seemed to relax him. "I guess we got some catching up to do, huh?"

"Sounds that way," I laughed. I looked at my watch. "I guess we should make our way up."

Mike peeled off his shirt. He wasn't fit like Keith, but I loved the view of his body. For all our times together, I'd never seen him head to toe naked. "I'll go get a new shirt," he said, reaching down to pull his shorts back up.

My glass was no longer ice cold, so I swapped it for a fresh one in the freezer. I could use that martini. The first sips were great, and between it and the sex I was glad I'd come out here.

Mike came back out, with a polo shirt that was his version of dressy. He picked up his beer can and patted me on the shoulder. "I'm glad you came, Alex." He was surprisingly on the same wavelength as me.

"Me too," I said.

Mike paused and looked at me more intently. Then leaned in again. Soon we were kissing once more, not just a gotta-fuck kiss. But something else. I guess we'd figure it out this week. And try not to get into too much trouble.

[lavishlyleo]

Astrology Observations 5

One thing I've noticed with Gemini Moons is that while they do love to talk to people and share their thoughts, if they aren't interested in the conversation's topic or if you stay on one topic for too long, they tend to zone out. If they aren't very invested in the convo at hand it will be VERY noticeable (e.g. blank stares, they suddenly go very quiet, dry repetitive responses, checking their phone frequently).

The same can be said for individuals with a lot of Air in their charts in general, especially Gemini and Libra. It can be hard to keep these individuals attention for prolonged periods of time. They like to cut to the interesting part so keep what you have to say very brief and to the point.

Not something Leo Moons are known for, but that I've noticed is that they can be really good at analyzing peoples behavior. Like, they'll see how someone acts and can make connections to their own behavior to understand some elses emotions and feelings. It's how many Leo Moons relate to people, bonus points if their Moon is in a water house!

In your Natal chart, if your ruling planet 's transit is in opposition or square with your natal ruling planet's sign, it can indicate a period of bad luck and hardship. It may feel like the world is against you at the moment, especially if said aspect is in a less than 5° orb. Not a great transit aspect to have.

For example, My ruling planet is Jupiter (Sag Rising) and it's in Scorpio at 9°. IRONICALLY ENOUGH, in my Solar Return chart for this year, Jupiter is in Taurus at 9°. So I'm expecting a lot to happen this year. Later on this year I'll make an update on this aspect.

If you have Scorpio or Pisces in your SR top 3 this year, don't take this lightly!! Like I said in my last post with manifestations, this will be a year that your manifestation power is at an all time high! You may literally speak things into existence, for better or for worse.

On the topic of Scorpio/Pisces SR top three, my advice for this (and I'm speaking from experience) is try to think about things you want to happen, not things you don't want or like. For example, if you think about how much you don't like a certain person, later on down the line you may find yourself suddenly coming back in contact with that person a lot more, when either you wanted to or not.

People with Cancer personal placements, I'd advise you to frequently check the Moon's transit and positions! Whenever it's the full or new moon, keep tabs on what happens those days and how you feel. Let me know in the comments anything interesting that's happened to yall during those times!

I've said this once and I'll say it again, Scorpio Mars are some of the most PERSISTENT people I've ever seen. When it comes to their desires, NOTHING stands in their way. However this can be detrimental if it's bad habits like drinking, smoking, stealing, ect. One way or another they will get what they want, even if it costs them everything. These people can truly be the victim of their own desires. Honorary mention- Taurus Mars.

Listen, if you ever need someone to promote your music, call an Aquarius Venus/Dominant person. I swear to god these people listen to the most obscure, outta pocket things I've ever heard.

Taurus 6th/5th housers tend to be those people at work that live by the slow and steady motto. They don't like to rush and do a sloppy job on whatever their working on.

On the other hand, Aries 6th/5th housers may be very fast workers, and it usually works well for them, works well under pressure. not the most thorough people but for the most part they get the job done.

People with a lot of Gemini and Leo placements in their chart tend to give off Aries energy.

Capricorn and Scorpio relationships are literally ride or die. I know a couple with many of these placements and they are so possessive of each other. Even after heated arguments and many hardships, they always come back together and work out their issues, it's really sweet!

When in an awkward situation, Libra Risings tend to try and break the tension first. Sometimes they can make the situation more awkward doing this but they're always the ones to bring the vibes back to the way they were, so I appreciate it. Gemini Risings may also do this but can be slightly more unhinged in their methods. I love both regardless for it😭💕.

The reason puberty for all of us hits hard is because it's around this time that Saturn is usually in the sign opposite from our Saturn sign. It makes a lot of sense when you think about it, itcchanges a lot of what we focus on and introduces us to new struggles. Although with Saturn retrograde, the age of which these changes can affect us can range from 13 all the way up to 25. Saturn is trying to toughen us up before we become adults.

What your Rising Sign's season is may be the season/months you prefer. For example, I'm a Sagittarius Rising and I tend to like late fall/early winter.

Your Moon sign can show how you process not just your emotions, but how you handle other peoples emotions, and how you relate to them. For example, a Leo Moon may relate to others by thinking of themselves in someone elses shoes, and how they would handle situations. While a Gemini Moon may relate other peoples emotions with stories from others that they've heard, and use what they've observed from other people to help others.

Venus PC Moon can also show this, I'd look at both sign's relationship to see the full picture of how one truly processes theirs and others emotions.

Moon/Pluto Aspects in someone's chart can show a relationship where however the mother treats the native, is how the native will end up treating her as they get older. For example, if the mother was negligent to the native in their younger years, then as they get older they will have a detached and impersonal attitude towards her. Basically the natives mirror how they were nurtured in youth.

"She say do you love me, I tell her only partly. I only love my bed and my mama I'm sorry." -Drake, a Cancer Moon.

People who say Gemini/Libra placements are indecisive have CLEARLY never met someone with many personal fire placements, especially if it's their top 3. Fire sign energy is naturally high and can be all over the place sometimes, this can include their thoughts and decision making as well, mostly concerning the direction of their passions and work. They may have a million ideas of what they're about to do but have trouble slowing down and planning it all out into managable chunks at a time. Will fight for what they want but may have trouble picking their battles wisely.

[deezneezz]

Leona & ADD

I got a few ppl (on twitter) wanting me to elaborate on Leona and ADD, so I figured I will share my thoughts here as well, please be nice it's just a personal hc. You don't have to agree at all!! Since it contains some personal experiences I ask of people to please be kind about it!

Anyway, Leona and ADD.

I think a lot of people usually agree on Floyd and Kalim having ADHD, but Leona actually shows a lot of lesser talked about traits of ADHD. Namely Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), sensitivity to clothing/textures (he doesn't like restrictive clothes).

He also has the more commonly talked about traits of course, executive dysfunction being a big one. And his depression definitely exacerbates these traits, when i was undiagnosed and depressed i used to sleep my entire days away. I wasn't getting anything done anyway.

Not to mention not sleeping properly, so I was desperate to find moments to sleep during the day. I've slept on floors, on toilets, in an abandoned corner in uni instead of going to class. I was just *so* tired all the time I didn't want to sit in class, I wanted to sleep.

I was lucky I passed classes without studying, cause i would've never gotten through uni otherwise. I still took longer than necessary. The moment my support system (Ruggie, anyone?) graduated and left I had no one taking care of my basic needs, and I certainly didn't.

I had a dorm mate who cooked for me, made sure I had even an ounce of self-care, and also looked at my room and said "hmm, Deniz, maybe it's time to clean up a little" and then I very reluctantly admitted that it may have gotten a little out of hand.

She would just sit in my room sometimes chilling around while I cleaned cuz that was one of the few ways I cleaned at all (this is a real thing for ADHD, called body doubling. It works). Ruggie arriving at NRC and Leona suddenly performing tons better in school is no coincidence.

Coming back to RSD.. I mean I don't really have to explain it do I.. book 2, Lilia's scathing remarks, the shame of disappointing his dorm, etc. I know a lot of ppl call book 2 an 'overreaction' but like, this is genuinely what it feels like internally when RSD triggers

book 6 too, Jamil's over-protectiveness is clearly (to the audience) smth that's mostly Jamil's own habits and trauma doing. But to Leona it's a rejection/insult to his ability to take care of himself, his skill, etc. This was genuinely smth that set me off too.

"How dare you try to explain to me smth I already know, do you think I'm stupid?" "You're not like me." The unwillingness to admit that someone may be relatable in any way because making any comparison to yourself makes you vulnerable to what you haven't achieved for yourself.

"I would ace these classes too if I wasted my time and life studying as much as they did, but I actually love myself." <- guy who was jealous and did not know he was coping and didn't study cause of executive dysfunction and concentration issues.

Leona clearly knows a lot about the things he genuinely cares about, Ancient spell language, chess, magishift, so its kind of funny to see him so low effort in classes. Though honestly i know the game also says that "Leona already knows all this stuff" so.. who knows really...

Now I'm more chill but I used to legitimately go off the handle a little cuz RSD doesn't really care about whether the shit u feel is proportional to the offence it physically hurts in your chest and you just wanna burn down the world at that exact time and... IS THAT NOT LEONA...

TLDR: give Leona therapy and meds, lol.

[yazthebookish]

Maybe I'll spoil you guys and talk about Gwynriel and ACOTAR5 and anything related to it overall. I recently finished my HOFAS reread and have some fresh thoughts. I'll let my thoughts guide me and some of these points I've already addressed in my insta stories yesterday. I just rather share a lengthy post here since I'll only tag under #gwynriel.

I often see arguments about how Gwyn and Azriel can't move the plot forward because the series is centered on the Archeron sisters.

First, that's not true because Sarah is following what she called "a traditional romance route". She's following the same patterns of Nalini Singh, Kresley Cole, and Lisa Kleypas where they publish multiple books in the same series following different couples.

This is fitting for a series like ACOTAR because it's romance-centered. And Sarah have already said that each couple is getting one book and there will likely be more books beyond ACOTAR6.

Saying that doesn't dismiss the importance of the sisters to the story, Feyre already has a trilogy centered on her. The spin-off just follows different characters including the sisters.

I won't try hard to convince people on this because I've already posted almost everything Sarah said about the spin-off series and what's it's about. So if the next book is not centered on an Archeron sister, that's for Sarah to bamboozle the fandom with.

One thing that stuck out to me is when I compared the ending of ACOSF with the scene of Bryce giving Nesta Gwydion and seeming like she left Nesta with a new quest.

First, this is what the text says, and this is Chapter 80, the very last chapter in ACOSF:

Succeeding in the Blood Rite didn't mean the training stopped. No, after she and her friends told Cassian and Azriel most of the details of their ordeal, the two commanders had compiled a long list of mistakes that the three of them had made that needed to be corrected, and the others wanted to learn from them, too. So they would keep training, until they were all well and truly Valkyries. Gwyn, despite the Rite, had returned to living in the library.

1. The Valkyries are not yet a unit.

2. SJM only and specifically highlighted that Gwyn, despite the Rite, returned to living in the library. It was like "hey, remember all the talk Gwyn did about wanting to leave the library after two years? Yeah that's on hold a bit but keep that in mind". She didnt even add Emerie or the other priestesses to that sentence.

With Nesta being left with Gwydion to find out why the 8-pointed star was tattooed on her, I don't think the next book will start with "hey Elain take this sword and deal with it". Who are Nesta's main companions now? Gwyn and Emerie.

I'll be back to the Valkyries but let's just talk about Azriel for a bit.

It is so painfully obvious to me that Azriel is being handed the Illyrian plot on a golden platter. How big or small of a plot it is depends on SJM, but it's important based on the fact that she fleshed out the Illyrian's origins and tied them to the crossover AND making Truth-teller the knife of Enalius.

That is a big deal for an Illyrian like Azriel.

And I quote my friend Lacie on this, it is very poetic for Azriel to be the owner of the knife that originally belonged to the person who freed his own people from the Daglan's clutches, perhaps because he saw his people are more than just slaves to the Daglan—how powerful would it be for Azriel, who loathes his own people, to parallel Enalius.

And for years some people were against Azriel dealing with this plot because he shouldn't make peace with his "abusers", its true his own family and some Illyrians failed him but he is condemning an entire population. Good people like Emerie and Balthazar. Even Rhys's mother, who had valid reasons to hate her people especially as a female, still made sure to make Rhysand connect with his Illyrian heritage and he even goes on to say that his mother didn't forget what they did to her but still loved her people.

If both Cassian and Rhysand (and by extension the author) continue to flag Azriel's hatred of the Illyrians as an issue—then it is a damn big issue for it to be addressed repeatedly.

Okay so to address my final point about Gwyn and Azriel and how they can move the plot forward.

Now I didn't detail out much about what the next book will deal with because that's another post (and I already have a post on that).

All of our theories and predictions are based on information that is available to us. Saying Azriel and Gwyn cannot move the plot forward does not make any sense because the central plot is tied to multiple characters, Archeron or not.

If SJM wants to make a character move the next book's plot forward, she can do it because she's in control of the story. She's in control of the narrative. She's in control of the characters.

The characters are puppets and this is an unfinished story. If some characters would add more value and make for a more interesting story before the others, she can decide on that. If she wants to make Eris the protagonist of the next book, she can easily do that whether the fandom wants it or not.

Let me give you an example of minor characters that pushed the plot forward and became main characters: Yrene Towers and the Hind. These kind of arguments could've been used for them in HOEAB or HOSAB and Pre-TOD. Before HOSAB/HOFAS and TOD, could we have predicted that they would have played a crucial role before those books? Not likely because they had minimal appearances and were not part of the main cast. This is what I'm talking about.

You can't know how a character will contribute to a story until you see how it all unfolds. We can make guesses on the information we have which is why I believe three characters are likely to join the main cast: Gwyn, Emerie, and Eris.

Why is it so easy to accept that Emerie might be sharing a book with an original character like Mor but it's hard to comprehend the fact that Gwyn could also share a book with Azriel? Because Emerie showed up in ACOFAS? To me that's not really a strong argument based on Sarah's writing and what we have in the books, she doesn't really pick based on who showed up the earliest. Here's a good example: Hypaxia, who showed up earlier, didn't even get her own chapters but the Hind did.

And there's one argument I recall about how I need to rely on Nesta to have a plot focused on Gwyn or the Valkyries in the next book. Nesta's arc is clearly not over based on HOFAS, but does that mean she's getting a POV? Not necessarily. I don't think she is. Gwyn is the perfect candidate for us to see what's going on with Nesta post-HOFAS and how they all deal with the Valkyries and whatever Sarah will set up with them.

There is this whole Valkyrie/Illyrian conflict that could be triggered as a result of the Blood Rite, with Ramiel definitely being an important location to explore in the next book, we also have the Pegasi and the Prison and the implications of the crossover. It makes sense to have an Illyrian and a Valkyrie POV to deal with some plots in the next book.

"Gwyn contributes to nothing" we can't know until the book is out. How sure are we that maybe SJM won't connect her to the crossover by making her mysterious father a Worldwalker? Or Prince of Hel? Or an Asteri? Maybe I'm right maybe I'm wrong.

"But Koschei! And the Human Queens!" Koschei will always be a background player pulling on the strings until the final book as it's obvious he is the big bad in the series, unless someone even worse is revealed. But no one is dismissing Koschei or the Human Queens messing around.

Literally what's the point of the story or the fun elements of surprises or plot twists if you need Sarah to list down everything that the next books will deal with. That's not how a story develops to me. I don't need to know everything in advance to just know how it will go. That's like knowing spoilers early on and checking off with each book what happened and what didn't happen. I feel like it's close to how a lot of readers were disappointed with not having enough ACOTAR in HOFAS, because Sarah implied half of the book would be set in Prythian. So by the time the book came out and it wasn't that, people were vocal about it.

In my opinion, SJM set a good foundation for Gwyn's arc to build up on in ACOSF and her arc is not over. We won't get mentions of her still carrying the guilt of her sister's death or not leaving the library after she said she's sick of being there for two years without us seeing resolution for that. She wouldn't be in Azriel's bonus chapter if she is not involved with him.

To conclude, my reread still affirms to me that the next book with an Azriel/Gwyn book. Azriel is clearly being set in the forefront.

[copperbadge]

https://www.wired.com/story/therapy-broken-mental-health-challenges/

I came across this (old) article and it made me think of what you shared about your therapy experience. Would you say your therapy experience worked? It almost feels like you were telling us about how you were A/B testing your way through it.

Yeah, I remember reading that article at some point either before therapy or early on. I don't remember what I thought overall but I do remember being astonished that people expected therapy to help them in six sessions, and that most people report improvement in only 15-20. Not because I think either of those things are unrealistic based on any kind of evidence, but because that's not the expectation I was ever handed when I was in therapy. I was in therapy for nine years as a kid, until I turned eighteen and could legally refuse to go. Not for anything I did, like it wasn't a court order, I was simply put into therapy and wasn't allowed to leave by the adults in my life.

The thing is, because it was mandatory, because at least one of those therapists broke ethical constraints, and because across nine years and three separate therapists nobody caught my ADHD, I have a more complicated relationship to therapy than a lot of people. I still catch myself thinking of things I can't tell my therapist because then she'll have leverage on me. Which is absurd, but it took me a long time to start saying those things to her. I am difficult and private and smart enough to make that a real problem, so it's been a slow process for me.

I also think that article is complicated, because it makes a lot of good points but it also seems at times to confuse therapy itself with the abusive nature of the American healthcare system. So while it's a useful article particularly when it speaks to marginalized peoples' experiences, it may discourage people who could benefit from therapy from doing the work to find a therapist. It's a good article to learn from, but I wouldn't advise people to decide for or against therapy based on it.

(My thoughts on my own therapy under the cut)

I'm still in therapy. It's difficult to measure results. I think I handle interpersonal stress better than I used to, but I haven't been able to find much to help with some of the emotional volatility I experience, and while I've set some good boundaries with family, the process of doing that was and continues to be stressful and upsetting, in some ways harder than simply not having them, so I'm still assessing that. Part of the problem for me is that I don't find cognitive-behavioral therapy useful for what I need, and while I understand there are differences, like 90% of all therapeutic systems boil back down to those techniques. Reality checking, visualizing, physical stimulus responses, mindfulness, as I said once to Therapist, "It's CBT all the way down." I don't respond to many of them and others I was already doing, so *shrug emoji*

At that point, when I realized there was no system that was going to help with my specific problems -- in part because the problems are ADHD related in a way that you can't train your way out of -- we also agreed it was time to try medication. Which felt like a failure, but I know that realistically I looked at the situation as it is, assessed my options, and made an appropriate choice, which is after all what therapy is often about.

So I've been on Clonidine for a couple of weeks. And it's doing fuck-all so far, but it's the lowest dose and there are other options too, so it's an ongoing process.

Outside of frustration with trying to fix problems that I honestly don't think anything but medication will fix, therapy's ok. If nothing else the expectation of it helps me identify actual problems in my life. And like most people I enjoy talking about myself but I also have a lot of struggle around asking for that kind of indulgence from friends, so doing that for an hour in a structured transactional kind of way is easier for me.

Ultimately, there's no real one-size solution that's called "Therapy", so whether or not I have found it useful isn't really material to whether someone else would. Some people use it as maintenance stress-relief, some people need to do deep emotional work, some people are in crisis and need an objective commentator. Sometimes you move from one need to another. Right now I'm in a liminal space because we're trying something new, so it's tough to say. But I'm finding it worth the cost in time, energy, and money, so I'll keep on until I don't anymore.

[yamujiburo]

I'm so thankful for you sharing the importance of protecting minors from sexual content. My parents and I didn't have much knowledge back then and I was exposed to this kind of stuff too early. I developed bad habits. I somehow deceived my family into trusting me way too much and, when I saw I had lost control and I asked for help, I saw my family was also hurt and they spent a lot on therapy and my anxiety medication. I have forgiven them for not knowing back them. But I still haven't forgiven myself for getting them through all that stuff. It's important to understand how much we need to protect minors from sexual content. Family members and artists, please pay attention to the content young audience is exposed to.

Of course! I can relate a lot to this. My parents were really good at monitoring what I was doing online for a while but they started trusting me more and I unfortunately started seeing a lot of stuff I shouldn't have but would keep it secret. Gonna talk about my experience a lil bit under the cut just bc I've been reflecting on it a lot recently (tw for grooming)

I gained a following of around 25K on deviantart by the time I was around 15/16. It was in the worst fandom too (mlp). I'd have a lot of much older men talking to me, drawing/writing nsfw of my characters who were underaged (they'd draw nsfw of myself and my sonas as well). It was so normalized for me and I didn't see anything wrong with it at the time.

I'd shipped Spike and Rarity at the time (very much do not anymore) and adult men would use that ship as a basis for trying to talk to me or get in a relationship. "We're just like Sparity! You're young but you're very mature for your age, so it's fine." I remember one guy trying REALLY hard to try and get me to move in with him. I was pretty creeped out then, but like holy shit that's SUPER creepy and I'm fortunate that he didn't keep trying after I gave him a hard "no".

It bled into my real life a bit when I met a 22 y/o man who asked me out when I was just 16 just turning 17. Luckily the relationship was NOT long lasting (I think he realized that I'm a very boring person LMAO) but I think about how I thought that that was a perfectly normal. I'd date go on to date people who were probably too old for me.

Also around when I was 16/17, people started shipping me with another artist in the fandom who was several years older than I was (side note: nothing wrong with an age gap! but it's very not okay when there's "waiting" for someone to be of legal age involved). I did end up dating said artist after I turned 18 and it was fine, I wasn't hurt or anything but I did find weird that we were shipped when I was still a teenager looking back (there was also nsfw drawn of us together before/when we were dating)

I just had such a warped sense of reality for a long because of this shit. I'm glad there's more conversations about this stuff and it's more known that adults should have little to no personal interaction with kids on the internet and vice versa. There's way too many stories of kids getting taken advantage of in fandom spaces. I think I got off fairly lucky all things considered. But bottom line YES kids need to be protected online and their exposure to sexual content/adult spaces should be limited or monitored. It's also really tough though because not all kids have adults in their real life that they can trust or go to to ask questions about sex so they seek solace in adults online and it's just a constant cycle.

I'm honestly unsure of what to do about that and I don't have all the answers but I ultimately just don't want kids online to end up in similar positions I was in when I was younger. I just do my best

[tenkohibari]

A crazy theory about the traitor of Tokyo Debunker

°°°

I have a theory about who the traitor ghoul could be.

[This is all translated with the translator, I'm sorry for any possible lexical or spelling mistakes, I hope you enjoy my theory]

[Spoilers for everything up to chapter 7]

Okay, I think that they really told us the truth from the beginning.

No, don't go, listen to me--

I think that, in the preface, before the story itself, where they give you to choose a ghoul to supposedly save, that's where the truth lies. Who is the traitor. And that's why I've been studying each of the statements of the 19 ghouls (except for Ed and Lyca) and GUYS I HAVE FOUND SOMETHING.

Before I tell you who I think the traitor is, I'll give you a little introduction: I've studied each of the ways ghouls throw themselves off the terrace and I've found 5 different base drawings, because they are bases that are repeated within the ghouls when they throw themselves off.

For example, base 1 (that's how I called it) is used by Jiro, Alan, Jin, Luca, Leo and Ritsu. I've been looking for ways to relate them to each other, but I haven't found any. Neither between their statements, nor their names, nor their ways of acting in front of MC. I mean, these guys seem to apologize to MC (each in their own way) except for Leo... That said, Leo's statement seemed hopelessly interesting to me, but I'll talk about it in a few paragraphs later. I thought that maybe the Kanji of their initials in Japanese, or maybe the pronunciation of their names in another language give rise to a secret message of why they chose these characters for this pose, or maybe I'm just thinking too much.

Well, the next position, position 2 (according to me, again) is occupied by Yuri, Rui, Taiga and Towa. Here I think the position fits with the boys and their statements, because none of them seem to really want to let you go. That's why they are trying to reach out their hand towards the MC, although perhaps timidly, because they are really accepting their fate.

Position 3, occupied by Tohma, Haku, Haru and Zenji, in their posture they don't try to get close to you in the least. They know they are going to die and they have accepted it. Again, I don't know how to fit it or link them together, but I know that they haven't been chosen at random. In this game nothing is a coincidence.

Position 4, the last one shared between ghouls, is occupied by Kaito, Sho, Romeo and Subaru. Again I don't know how to link them together. Oh well Subaru's statement made me very intrigued, I'll also discuss it later.

Well, and there is ONE LAST POSITION THAT ONLY HAS ONE CHARACTER

That character is Ren. And I think he is the traitor.

WAIT DON'T GO, LET ME EXPLAIN

Now is when you will say "why do you think Ren is the traitor just because of his falling position?" well, WELL. To start with I don't think there are "coincidences" in this game, that is, if they have made an effort to make only one drawing for Ren, there must be a reason, right?

Well, let's analyze his line now step by step:

~~ "This is exactly the reason I didn't want to do this! I knew this was how it would end! What am I doing here? This is all your fault..."

'This is the reason I didn't want to do this'? What does he mean by 'this'? It could be anything, but what if he's talking about betraying MC? Because Taiga never said who the traitor works for. What if he works for Darkwick...?

We can't trust Darkwick, that's become clear throughout the chapters. Also, the ghouls are aware that they're trapped inside the academy, and that's not counting what he did to Lyca. So I don't rule out the possibility that Darkwick was the one who 'hired' our spy, so to speak. Also, from the beginning it's clear that Ren doesn't fit in at Jabberwock, where he was assigned... What is he doing there? What if the academy put him there by rigging the entrance ceremony? Because we all know that Jabberwock is home to a hundred anomalies... And if a student in charge of taking care of them deals with them, it won't look weird. That's why Darkwick brought Ren into Jabberwock and somehow bought him to work there. Because, do you remember the mermaid named by Hyde in chapter 7? The one that's not in Morktranken? The one under Haru's custody? Ren is from Jabberwock, he might know something about it... And have gotten hold of it to give to the patient... Although this deduction leads me to another question: why would the academy do this? Or is Ren working for someone inside the academy, like an independent body...? Like that janitor who appears four times throughout the story, that very suspicious one about whom we know nothing.

Guys, I repeat that in this game COINCIDENCES DO NOT EXIST

'I knew this was how it was going to end!' Ren knew there was something wrong from the beginning? Not even Taiga knew, in his statement he asked us what we had done wrong... And now Ren comes and tells us that he had a bad feeling from the beginning... This causes a lot of doubts. Because what is Ren doing telling us that if he lives always locked in his phone? That only means that he knows more than he says.

'What am I doing here? This is all your fault' To begin with, why does he blame us? Not even Leo (u, damnit bitch) talks to us like Ren does. Also, speaking of Leo, his statement tells us that "I will make those assholes pay for this" IN PLURAL which indicates that the traitor works for someone else and does not do it for his own ideals... With Leo's statement I completely rule out that he is the spy, to tell the truth. But I could be wrong.

Returning to the subject of Ren blaming us, I can only wonder what leads him to that. Why does he blame us? What leads us to the hell in which the game begins...? And why is Ren the only one who blames us while the rest of the ghouls either blame themselves or don't name it. I mean, not even Leo does! This just makes me think more and more that Ren isn't hiding anything good... And I also wonder why Subaru is the only one who blames himself directly. I know his personality is like that... But I can only think of Subaru and his misleading statement... Maybe the company wants us to think badly of him? After all, Professor Moby told us that the Hotarubi ghouls are hiding something. And we don't know if we've really discovered what they're hiding or if we've only seen the tip of the iceberg. And Haku seems pretty suspicious to me too, after telling the principal "have I ever hidden something from you?" BUT WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT HAKU RIGHT NOW. I know he's hiding something, but I don't think he's the traitor.

Now let's talk about Ren's position.

He's the only one who, when he jumps off the balcony, really seems like he doesn't want to do it. He's the one who stretches his hand out more emphatically towards MC, as if he were regretting what he's doing, or as if he's doing this because he has no other choice or... I don't know. His very stiff posture towards you just seems suspicious to me.

But that's because I think he's the traitor, right? Maybe I'm thinking too much, right?

Remember guys that this here is JUST A THEORY because there are still many chapters and many tests left to be able to refute what we've seen so far. I'm also a follower of several theories that I will be publishing and outlining in the future.

And I'm not an expert in making theories so if you see holes in this one, DON'T HESITATE TO DEBATE WITH ME IN A RESPECTFUL WAY. I'll be reading you ^^

[naoreco]

I figure it’s worth putting on the Tumblr radar since much of this is current discussion of Niosi is happening on Twitter.

(content warnings for sexual assault, abuse, manipulation, and otherwise taking advantage of people)

On Chris Niosi, and Kyle McCarley’s defense of him:

Recently Chris Niosi (aka Kirbopher), who has admitted to abusing people around him for at least a decade, was cast in Honkai Star Rail as the character Moze. Five years have passed since his public apology, where he addresses some specific callouts from victims to debatable effect, but unfortunately he’s lied about apologizing to all of his victims (1, 2), and the specific apologies he has written are now deleted from his tumblr, calling his efforts into changing for the better into his question. Furthermore, as he has a history of taking advantage of his fans even in his more underground days (1+2, 3), putting him in a situation where he has access to more fans to put him on a pedestal is dangerous. Other users have iterated much of this already on tumblr, where it was already discussed in previous years, so this is just some context.

But I’m here to talk about something related that hasn’t gotten any Tumblr coverage. For example, people here have talked about Griffin Puatu’s reddit post defending him already. But nobody has mentioned Kyle McCarley defending him yet.

On July 19, 2024, in the replies of Moze’s introduction tweet, he had this to say:

He addresses his use of “bad boyfriend” downplaying legitimate abuse later. I don't think it's great but we’ll get to that. However, “the court of public opinion” is a concept that he does stand by, perhaps reinforced by the backlash he received for this. Some of this was vitriolic, given the kind of person he was defending from further criticism, but others did try to reason with him, including some of the above and more as evidence that Niosi isn’t being entirely truthful about his atonement, and overall most responses expressed disbelief and disappointment more than anything else.

Still, he deactivated his account the following day, on July 20, 2024.

Unfortunately, our story doesn’t end there. In the early morning of July 21, 2024, he made an announcement in his Discord server.

So here's the thing about Niosi not being a confirmed sexual abuser or rapist or pedophile. I don't have everything, with this being such an expansive case so this is off what I've found. You know the time he planned to take advantage of his girlfriend at the time while said girlfriend was intoxicated (plus this follow-up where he attempted to cover for himself)? Drunk people cannot consent, especially not when drunk sex is already a hard boundary. Although this technically doesn't make him a rapist, to my knowledge, if you're gonna argue semantics it'll just sound like "well he didn't ACTUALLY rape someone so it's not as bad". Is it not already terrible that he tried to and still downplayed it when called on it? Besides, as mentioned in Lighty's testimony linked above, he's let other in his sphere groom minors under his watchful eye, and his other ex Audrey had things to say about how he weaponized sexual favors too. If someone actually has more on a history of sexual abuse and pedophilia, though, please bring it to my attention. I'll add it to this post.

Either way, we don't know what he knows. At best, Kyle has a very incomplete picture of the situation, and at worst he does have a complete picture and he just doesn’t think it’s valid or up-to-date criticism. The person who first brought this to people's attention on Twitter also mentioned that her messages in the server were being deleted when she spoke up to provide evidence, so for someone who welcomes others to share evidence how open he actually is to it is questionable. (UPDATE: There's more to this part of the story but we'll get to it in a future update.) His final message a couple of hours from these just solidifies it.

Having joined the server myself to see, around the time of the announcements seems to have been scrubbed clean, but there is some current discussion of the topic as of this post. Furthermore, someone there has stated that they're compiling sources to send his way to give him a better understanding of the situation (even if they're not sure if he still wants to talk about this), so maybe this will finally get him to reconsider his stance! Only time will tell.

Overall, though, I stand by my point that if Niosi makes a living, it should be somewhere far away from the public eye. Don't give him a platform to find new fans to take advantage of. Don't give his victims the opportunity to be retraumatized whenever they start a new game of show. He's been given more than enough chances. It's time to turn over a new leaf instead of digging his heels into the ground.

Still, I don't know if Kyle will change his mind at this point. I want him to - I tried, back when his Twitter was still up - but even at this stage he's doubled down on a situation he knows he might not have the full story on and I'm not sure if I can trust that. For any other fans, give this some thought - keep an eye out for any future developments if you still want to have faith in him, move on from him if you can't stand it. I just want him to at least hold his friend accountable instead of trying to shield him from the lasting consequences of his own actions.

(I'll be linking future updates here: #1, #2 and #3 for now.)

[rey-jake-therapist]

I was sent an ask related to the armor that Sauron *apparently* gifted Galadriel with, in Numenor. Apparently, some people believe that this gift was Sauron love bombing Galadriel. We all have our analyses, I just think this one's wrong.

Proof 1 : we didn't see Sauron give her the armor. We don't even know if it's him who gave her that. I don't know why it suddenly became "canon" that he did. Because Charlie nodded after a producer said the armor was a gift ? That's not how it works, sorry. I like to believe that the armor was a gift from Saurbrand, but what's show!canon is what we see in the show. Nothing more, nothing less.

So why is it a proof ? Because the writers would have wanted us to see him gift her with the armor, and see it as manipulation after the Sauron's reveal. Heck, maybe that's why this scene didn't made the final cut at the end, because they knew that this would be misinterpreted ?

And seriously, I can't see Sauron believe that Galadriel would become codependant of him because he forged her an armor lol This is giving Haladriel a dynamics it doesn't have.

Proof 2: I know what love bombing is, for I had my share of it and the odious behavior that inevitably follows love bombing. Sauron never love bombed Galadriel. He never flattered her, never gave her gifts (except, perhaps, this armor), never promised her anything, never had any "we will do this or that, you'll see it will be fantastic" bs talk. He compared her to a HORSE for god's sake. Galadriel of the Noldor, a horse ! lmao We as the audience saw he couldn't keep his eyes off her, but he never told her she was beautiful (except when he proposes to her, indirectly, when he told her she was "fair as the sea and the sun"). if he ever did love bomb her, it was during his proposal. Before that ? Never.

It's an entire different tactic that Saurbrand uses with Galadriel: "chase me and I flee". From the beginning he shows her he doesn't give a shit about what she wants ("I have other plans, Elf"), and keeps asking her to leave him alone, not very nicely. He also gently lectures her about how she should behave in public ("kneel", "try not to make new enemies"), criticizes her methods and gives her advice... Something that constantly unsettles her because she's not used to that. She's a Elf princess, a commander ! And here goes this little man, this mortal ! who forces her to calm down and listen to something else than her own voice, for once.

THIS is not love bombing by any means. I can tell you who he loved bombed though : Celebrimbor. This relationship was abuse 101 : love bombing, isolating the person from their friends, antagonizing him then saying "I'm sorrryyyyy", another love bombing, gaslighting, emotional violence followed in the end with physical violence... Except for the violence part that I have never been subjected to, I recognized all the patterns. It was quite unsettling, let me tell you, to witness this abuse unfold and think each time, "wow, I've been through that too, but I didn't realize until I got out of it".

Personally, I feel like he made that armor out of a possessive desire to see her wearing something that HE made, so that he can feel validated, but as a manipulation tactic to guilt her into staying by his side? Idk...

I don't think that as arrogant as he is, Sauron believed he could make Galadriel dependant of him just because he offered her an armor 😂 If he did forge this armor, I think he made it as a reconciliation gift of sort. The last scene they shared on screen before the departure to Numenor, they didn't leave on good terms... This gift could be his way to tell her, "Okay, let's do it, let's lead this army together". Of course it wasn't a wedding dress... Strange idea, people think that ?

She obviously lied to Adar about what Sauron promised her. The only thing that Sauron promised Galadriel was to make her a QUEEN, which involves much more than an army. Of course she wouldn't say that to Adar, while she didn't even tell Elrond, her best friend... She is the one who promised Sauron an army, and she indeed, gave him one. I mean at some point people can twist the narrative as much as they want to make it look like she was entirely manipulated by Sauron into giving him an army, it will still be wrong lol Not to mention that it takes away Galadriel's agency.

Did he provoke her, by reminding her constantly that she was "short of an army"? Yep. Did he learn her a few tricks for her to use against Miriel, knowing he would profit from it eventually ? That too. Is he the one who convinced her to recruit an army so they could fight their mutual enemy together? NOPE. She did that on her own.

And the funniest, it's that Galadriel convinced herself that Halbrand was the one who convinced Miriel to send an army in the Southlands. No wonder why she's in such denial in season 2. She's not much different from Sauron in that they both refuse any responsability in their wrongdoing: "He deceived me !" "You chose it, not I !" "I was played like a harp !".

I don't think I ever saw this parallel pointed out...

Source

See these two liars being called out by the people who know better...

It's about time we stop treating Galadriel as an innocent victim who was targeted by the evil villain who played 4D chess with her. She's just not that. Celebrimbor was Sauron's victim, because he had little to no control over what was happening. Sauron did everything to blindsight him, and used all the tactics of the abuser book to get what he wanted from him. And when Celebrimbor resisted, he threatened him, tortured him and murdered him.

He didn't do any of that with Galadriel, who wanted an army to hunt Sauron wayyyyyy before she found him on the raft, or do we forget that too ?

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

The Arcana HCs: M6 with an MC who's been through SA

~ here's some angst/hurt/comfort, friends. I've held off on writing this for so long because I know it's a heavy topic, but considering how I've yet to meet a femme-presenting person who hasn't been through this and how unacknowledged masc-presenting survivors are, I figured it was worth a shot. you are seen, you are loved, you did not deserve it, and you are more than worthy of good things <3 ~

CW for, obviously, references to SA (sexual assault) and descriptions of related triggers. Rated PG-13

PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF IT WOULD DO YOU MORE HARM THAN GOOD

-- for headcanon purposes, the details of MC's experience (what happened and when) are up to the reader's interpretation and comfort level. However, MC is able to remember it by the beginning of the prologue --

Julian

When you first tell him about it, you can almost hear his heart cracking with every word. He's pained and horrified

And he's not going to interrupt or make it about him. He carefully navigates himself to put all of his attention into listening to you without his presence being suffocating or overwhelming

Heartbroken

Waits until you've finished talking, and gently asks if he can ask you a few more questions in a medical capacity

He'll never, ever press you to share details that you're not comfortable with, but he understands the human body and given how much he cares about yours, he wants to make sure you're ok

If there's anything medical/physical that needs to be addressed and if you're comfortable with it, he'll do the gentlest, safest job of taking care of you that he's ever done in his life

His greatest impulse is to wrap you up in a hug and tuck your head under his chin and swirl his cloak around you like a pair of wings until you're all bundled up and safe

But he doesn't want to touch without permission, and - oh, please tell him his particularly blatant brand of flirting didn't bother you. Or if it did, please do tell him, because he never wants to hurt you

Walks on eggshells for each physical progression of your relationship because he's terrified of discovering your boundaries the wrong way, quick to establish that none of it is your fault

Never, ever lets you think less of yourself for it

Asra

When they first heard about it, they physically froze in place

He said very little. The only spoken words on his end were either to invite you to talk about it, or to comfort you. He spent most of the time with his hand over his mouth and pain and anger in his eyes

Their determination to never impose their feelings on you tripled, and much of their tendency to leave on such physically distanced trips came from wanting to preserve your personal living space

Made sure to teach self defense moves, both physical and magical

Long after your relationship turns from friendship to romance, he continues to ask every time he shares a sleeping space with you if it's okay, and is always happy to snooze nearby instead

Double and triple checks which kinds of touch you're okay with when they want to be affectionate with you. They can hold your hand, but please don't grab your wrist? They won't even touch it

Given how connected your bond makes you, both emotionally and physically, he's very careful about establishing boundaries

They can tell you're struggling emotionally - is it okay if they try feeling it with you?

He's on a trip, and wants you to feel a hug - is it okay if he sends his touch to you like that? Would you rather touch him instead?

Both versatile and creative when it comes to finding ways to share love without triggering you - wrapping their shawl around you in lieu of a hug, playfully sitting on their hands to share a kiss

If time heals all wounds, love turns the wreckage into a garden

Nadia

Her chin snapped up and the look in her eyes became so fierce when you first mentioned it that you almost became afraid

Which is why her whole demeanor shifted into something both soft and protective for the rest of the conversation. Tell her everything you're willing to, and then please let her take care of you

She's extremely gentle with you afterwards, until she's once again sure of what kind of physical and relational dynamic you want

She knows there's nothing wrong with her liking to take the lead, but she loves you and the last thing she wants is for her preference to play into your trauma. She does bring this up in conversation

What are you comfortable with her initiating? What are things she can change about how she initiates touch to make you feel safer and give you more freedom to speak your preferences?

Very, very gently asks if there's anything she's done so far that has bothered you, and offers you the most loving, sincere apology

Goes out of her way to make sure that you always have accommodations to let you ensure your own safety

Crowded party? She's got a quiet room to slip into if you need it, with a guard at the entrance and a signal if you need to retire

You don't like to feel restricted/touched in certain ways? Everything from your clothing to the jewels she gifts you are tailored to feel as safe and protected as possible

Nobody knows what happened to the person who harmed you, but you never hear from them again. At all

Muriel

You swear you could see him shrink a little when he first heard

It was like a little bit of life left his eyes, and all that was leftover was a deep, respectful, shared grief

It's not as if he can relate to the type of harm you experienced specifically, but he knows what it's like to have his body exploited and objectified for someone else's gain, and he knows it hurts

That's most of how things proceed at first - he doesn't drastically alter his behavior around you (let's be honest, he never touched you without knowing it was safe for both of you to do so)

But he does move differently around you. Even fewer sudden noises, body language designed to be as non-threatening as possible, a small, reassuring nod anytime you make eye contact

(though in that last case, the nod happens as he's flicking his eyes away and blushing at being caught)

Anything he can do to acknowledge your personal space and physical autonomy, he does, and he doesn't stop doing it

The more you find yourself comfortable opening up about what happened, or at least, how what happened has affected you, the more easy he finds it to open up to you in turn

Hypervigilant about how other people perceive you and their intentions with your personal space. Can and will scare off anybody shady with his perfected stinkeye

Always, always, always touches you like you're something precious, never without asking, with gentleness and reverence

Portia

She still feels a little bad about how extreme her outburst was when you first talked to her about it, when what she really wanted to do was give you a safe space to express yourself

Jaw dropped, a loud indignant "What?!", and then her chin wobbling with rage while her eyes began to well up with tears

Oh she wanted to scoop you into a hug so bad while she cried for you, but she knew that wasn't what you needed

Quick to make a time and space as calm and cozy and safe as possible to talk about it more with you, with fuzzy blankets and tea and snacks to make it a little less unpleasant

Not pushy at all, but not hesitant to ask you questions, both about what happened, and about how you feel about it and how that changes the way you do relationships and touch

Couldn't help crying for you on and off the whole time, but used her handkerchief quietly and refused to take attention from you

She's the most touchy-feely, so she's quick to ask you questions about what kinds of affection you're okay with receiving in general, what kinds you'd like to be asked about first, what to avoid, etc

Already the type of person who picks up on social vibes quickly, she never hesitates to steer you away from a shady character

And now that she's seen how it impacts your life, she's quick to ask around about people with weird vibes, and warn both you and anyone who seems like they might be vulnerable to them

Dedicated to reminding you how important you are every day

Lucio

He didn't get what you were talking about (beyond being able to tell that you were describing a past unpleasant experience) until you straight up told him without beating around the bush

Shocked, and later, furious

It ends up being a conversation you have to come back to, because once he gets a rough idea of what happened, he's spending half an hour pacing and brandishing his gauntlet and spewing threats

How dare they - how dare anyone think for a moment that treating someone as incredible as you is okay? He is throwing them in the dungeon. He's not Count anymore, but he'll find a way!

Doesn't think for a second that you could be remotely to blame

Which means he also doesn't think to remind you that it's not your fault and that you haven't somehow become worse for the experience until you bring up those feelings

He will happily rage about all the good things you deserve if you do

He knows you're strong and capable, but the thing he intuitively wants to do is make you feel safe. Whether that be by keeping watch while you sleep, or standing between you and strangers

Not very used to restraining himself when he wants to fling himself at you for a hug, and it takes a little trial and error for both of you to figure out what sudden affection feels safe and what doesn't

Won't hesitate to pull his sword on anyone crowding into your space or making you uncomfortable

Never sees you in the shadow of your pain. You are you - that's all

[howlsofbloodhounds]

Is yugo a proshipper/neutral? Genuine question because they’ve done some… questionable things in the past (shipping frans, using slurs they can’t claim in a comic (the f slur).

I mean I came across a post that said they were pretty chill with someone shipping epic with freaking Xgaster in march of this year and I was like??????? (Dude?? 1. That guy is an alternate version of your abusive father. 2. He’s basically Cross’s father (y’know your canonical best friend?)  who also abused by him. like what????)

(here the link btw https://www.tumblr.com/yugogeer012/745992208927293440/im-very-interested-in-how-yugo-reacts-to-the-fact?source=share )

And I find it weird that they seem to chill about that, but if you try and bring up epic in any way possible they lose it since they have unbridled hatred towards him and his fans. (bonus points when someone talks about shipping epic and cross, heck shipping epic with anyone male tends to make them annoyed, despite some early art depicting epic FLIRTING WITH METTATON) 

(also here the link: https://www.tumblr.com/sanicpluushy/761634810556039168/can-we-see-epicsans-flirtin-i-do-imagine?source=share ,

and my thoughts : https://www.tumblr.com/talonsirgo/761779011986800640/this-is-even-funnier-when-you-scroll-down-to?source=share)

I'm pretty sure they wiped Epic and his papyrus out of the comic just so they wouldn't have to deal with them anymore.

At this point i've already blocked them for their hostility towards all things epic/epic being gay/shipping him with xgaster and the whole frans stuff. I mean dude, even comyet is grossed out by anyone trying to ship ink with a gaster or his fathers (who are gasters and aren't even related by blood. Not that it matter tho, it's stil gross).

Come on yugo. You're better than this

(oooh btw did you se my where i @ you?? I found some pretty interesting analysis on cross thats been agreed upon by jakie herself, unfortunately it was done by the creator of dreamswap eugh.)

I don’t know if they are or not, because shipping Frans (or used to) and using f slurs while they actively seem to really really hate any gay ships but is very okay with lesbian ships seems a little strange. Potentially fetishizing perhaps, although maybe they’re just annoyed if they were constantly bombarded with sans x sans questions and stuff.

I don’t know Yugo, haven’t finished reading any of the Epictale content and i haven’t scrolled all through the blog, so I can’t say for sure. Maybe someone with more knowledge on this can chime in.

Although, after reading one of the links you sent me, i think you might’ve misread something.

The asker and yugo didn’t say they shipped Epic x XGaster or were okay with that, they say were okay with Epic Gaster x XGaster. No alternative sons being shipped with alternative fathers, although DILFs (im using this word just because they are both fathers not because i personally want to fuck them 💀) who are the same person are being shipped and yugo at least doesn’t mind or doesn’t care.

I don’t know what their issue is with their own characters and people liking them, but I think yugo probably needs to set some boundaries with fans if they haven’t already.

rather than getting annoyed when people inevitably ship best friends and one of them is their character who they make flirt with men, perhaps they should just ask people to not send them questions about sans x sans ships, or crepic if it really makes them that uncomfortable. and if anyone does, just delete the asks or comments or reblogs.

getting annoyed when people bring up or ask about the characters you made seems pretty strange to me, it’s just a sign that people really like your character enough to be obsessed with them, but i can understand if they got annoyed if epic was all anyone focused on and not any of the other characters. but in that case, they should probably just delete anything they get about epic (from fans) they don’t want to see or answer.

but to allow your emotions and fans like of your character to cause you to change a story, or erase or get rid of the character, just to spite the fans/character or just so you don’t have to deal with them seems very odd to me. perhaps yugo needs to take a step back from the Epictale “fanbase” and stop engaging with it.

they can’t control what fans do with their work and characters as soon as it leaves their own eyesight, and they’d be better off not stressing over it. and fans should respect them, and stop bringing fandom stuff to them like ships or asking their opinions on ships—no one needs a creator’s opinion on a ship.

epic is a different thing, since he’s literally a character in the story, and a sans at that—which of course means people will bring him up and ask about him. if they don’t want to answer anything about epic, they should make that very clear and then don’t answer. Not answer just to give annoyed, passive aggressive replies. I think it’s sad when creators allow a fanbase to taint and affect their feelings about their work.

{ @talonsirgo }

[guardian5tiger3]

Tarot pick a group ....

Anything that comes up.

1. 2. 3.

One

You guys are what people call lovers of life. A lot of you are really into some form or forms of art. A lot of you are really wise, open minded , really psychedelic type of individuals know it or not. You have a fresh way of looking at things a lot of the time and other people may feel that way about you all. You're definitely something a lot of people and really what the world needs . It's like you would be something missing and things would be incomplete without your uniqueness. :)

Oddly I got something about fried food maybe some of you work in a restaurant but really I'm getting the energy that you should treat yourself like you love yourself and fuel yourself with love when it comes to anything you take in and just generally the energy you put yourself in and feel. I'm picking up a really light nice energy. So I'm getting a quote from Alan Watts . Oddly I can't find the quote I'm thinking of .. but I saw one that said " waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be. "

I seriously can't find the quote some of you should look into Alan Watts and what he talks about. Generally, though, I'm getting you're searching for something maybe consciously or unconsciously and the universe wants to motivate you to continue to do that and I'm feeling a lot of refreshing energy, so if you open yourself up and allow any energy the universe is trying to gift you that. I heard "a peace of mind" and felt in my third eye really calm. And I see a bird with its wings open now. So there's some information or knowledge or wisdom or something and you will find it just stay on the path that you're on and focus on any good vibes around and within you. Spring time also is looking good for you guys a few of you might be moving also seeing about someone adopting a dog if you thought about that this is saying you should or maybe you already know you're gonna idk. For most of you though look forward to spring I see seeds you planted growing metaphorically which is totally with the season, and good surprises and just really good happy fun light energy. Especially!!! If the winter was kind of rough. Even if you just didn't have fun with the weather if you live where it snows. Or any personal struggles with that being a metaphor for that, I saw a heavy snowstorm, so , yeah. :)

Two

I've been getting a lot of weather symbolism so far and I saw like a rain storm for you all. I also got two cards about conflict, in general. So if you can relate to any tense , irritating energy, anything negative going on this is for you . Even just negative vibes especially with other people or for some living situations even for someone something to do with a kid in your life so it really depends and of course is gonna be specific for everyone what it might be. Seems like you've been trying to stay stable and "hold your own" best you can while also trying to go with the flow in terms of regulating your emotions according to the situation at hand. I just got three nines in a row, 999. That can tell you this is all coming to an end around this time or soon ok. Really picking up queen energy too ..? This is kind of strange but I'm picking up on the energy of treasure like you'll have a surprise or gift or something good from the universe like a present cause of this stuff and just y'all being good people thru this stuff and everything as best you can and being very stable for the circumstances or in general, but I initially got it worded and presented like, treasure. Like pirates or something which is funny cuz I just got a pirate sword tattoo haha. I'm also channeling old cartoons for some reason, like Tom and Jerry specifically, the old ones, like when you were a kid chilling Sunday morning watching the cartoons with your bowl of cereal or whatever. That's a vibe a lot of people share having to be able to experience. I rocked with wacky races and Scooby Doo lol. Among others ..Maybe something you're manifesting now goes all the way back to your childhood, somehow that's a hint. I'm also getting candy and heard sweettooth y'all better be careful with all that or find alternatives so to not damage your teeth ok. And if any of you are eating cuz you're bored ok straight up I heavily got play video games lol. I can relate to that. Also going for walks. Some of you need to drink cold water and make sure you're focusing on hygiene in any way. And for anyone feeling like life is bleak or boring or whatever or unexcited I would say stick to a routine and keep yourself busy for now, things always change no matter what that's a rule of life, and something might come to you one day that's a good idea for something to do, a new adventure, hobby, maybe you volunteer somewhere cool or anything really, it seems like you'll just have an idea eventually.

Three

39, 41,14,13 ,15 all might be significant. Maybe something about math and how math works.....? Wtf... Ok....y'all might talk about the matrix or get references to that. Also a lot about nature especially.... During the day. Also about camping. And ....parks? Depends on who you are. Andddd 16. Right I don't know if this all adds up to something or what I've never been super great at math so... Or maybe something is straight up building up to something ...? Lol. Lot of riddle like energy in this. I got humpty Dumpty . Y'all WTF is this . ? This is so specific and doesn't make a lot of sense to me but what I just channeled was like a group of people or at least two chilling like campfire vibes and sharing something to smoke and just hanging out kinda..... Idk if you want a time like that you can manifest it or some of you already have vibed like that idk. Cuz I saw multiple instances around a campfire and not but mainly at night or in the afternoon ,also sitting on steps outside. I guess you guys in your lives right now it's a lot about synchronicities and ... Going with the flow...? I keep picking up on Dora. The explorer. Anyway y'all seem like ok if your lives are all stories at the end of the day and you're in the middle of your journey but it's like a dope journey ,like embrace whatever adventures you're on and all the obstacles you face cause you have a destiny at the end of it. And by end I don't mean the end end I mean once you meet the ending of this your life will go on, after the happy ending (didn't mean to say happy ending but I added happy. :) . ).... Are you guys just confused in life cause I couldn't tell you what any of this means but hey if it resonates than I guess this is your confirmation youre on the right path.

I'm really picking up that the amount of fun you have at this point in your life at any given moment is mostly up to you. I think there's some points in time in the past and future that are destined to be certain vibes. Like looking at the stars or you have a altercation with someone or whatever you know but , I heard "in the meantime" like, for most of the time you can kind of decide to have fun, make things fun, you're free to do whatever you want. Some of you need to hear and absorb that. You are free. So make the most of that. Whatever you feel in any given moment.

Also , in the meantime is a song by spacehog, me being me I'd say listen to the whole album it has a few of my favorite songs on there personally, but yeah that's a great song so I do personally recommend it , too. Also I heard space song, space, traveler. Maybe I'm picking up on song names and don't know. I know space song is obviously a song but idk about traveler or space so idk. If you know a song like with those words it's significant. For some reason I wanna say, have a good day, lol. I hope this makes sense if it was meant for you. :) . Y'all definitely get a happy ending. So worry less and enjoy the moment it couldn't be more clear to me if you resonate with any of this, you definitely get a happy ending and it'll all be more than ok. Just roll with it. ;) 💗

[kinkandkreep]

𝑩𝒊𝒕𝒆 𝑴𝒆

A/N: Hey hey y'all! 👋🏾 Long time no Miguel huh? Well, to remedy that, I've got here a shorty, but a goodie. I've named her Bite Me, and you'll see why as you read. I hope y'all enjoy, and feel free to share your thoughts and send in more Miguel related asks, provided you read my rules first. Ok, and again I say, enjoy! 😁

❥︎ 𝑮𝒊𝒈𝒊 𝑴𝒊𝒏𝒊 𝑴𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕

You had a bad habit of getting on Miguel’s nerves. 

Not that you were necessarily trying.

At least, not all the time, or even most of the time. 

Is what you say. But Miguel knows better. 

He knows that you may or may not-so-secretly enjoy setting him off. And it’s not even always in the words you say, although those can be particularly infuriating. 

It’s in the way you sashay around him, curves and dips on full display. It’s in the way you touch him, gentle yet teasing. A “comforting” hand on his shoulder, that slowly but surely begins to trail downward, resting just on the small of his back.

Which for Miguel, is particularly sensitive.

To sum up, you're driving Miguel insane. 

He’s always especially on the verge of losing it when he sees you interacting with the other spider people around the complex. 

You’re so friendly and jovial, always offering to help and lending a hand whenever anyone needs something. 

This is undoubtedly a good thing, and Jess always comments on how nice it is to have a go getter like you on the team. 

She’s right, and your propensity for helpfulness would be fine…

If you didn’t insist on also being so touchy with the people you aid. 

And always in front of Miguel no less.

Miguel’s not exactly sure where this sudden possessiveness stems from, but he just knows that he loathes the thought of you touching anyone else the way you touch him. 

He quietly observes you as you go about your business, talking and mingling with the other spiders. 

A seemingly innocuous touch on the shoulder here, a comforting rub on the arm there. 

And a playful butt slap?! 

Uhn uhn, nope.

Miguel stomps over to where you are, currently doubled over laughing at the flushed face of one of your fellow spider men. 

“__? May I speak to you in the lab? There’s something I’d like you to see.”

Miguel’s tone is apparently firmer than he intended, as you quickly straighten up, clearing your throat and gesturing for him to lead the way. 

You don’t miss the way his eyes throw daggers at your companion, but you decide against commenting on it. 

The trek to the lab is mostly quiet, and while you’re not exactly afraid of Miguel, you wonder what it is he needs to show you. 

Different thoughts occupy your mind up until you reach the lab, such that you nearly bump into Miguel when he abruptly stops walking. 

“So, what can I do ya’ for Mr. Boss Man? You said you needed to show me something?”

Miguel is silent for some seconds more, and you’re about to speak again when he suddenly turns, leveling you with a glare that has you taken aback. 

“Do you have any idea how infuriating you are?”

Well, you certainly weren’t expecting that. 

Mouth agape, you grasp for words like a fish out of water. 

“Wh-..I-I’m…what?!”

“You switch around here like you’ve not a care in the world, always so chipper and touchy. Everytime I look around, there you are laughing with or smiling at or touching someone. Why can’t you just be still?”

You’re so taken aback that you can’t even formulate a response for several moments. Where on Earth was this coming from? Since when had Miguel been observing you for long enough to even begin harboring these feelings? And why was he just now saying something? Was it because of earlier?

“-__…hello, Earth to __?”

“Miguel, what in the world? This whole thing has thrown me for a loop. Where is this coming from all of the sudden?”

The man doesn’t answer for several seconds, blood red irises burning into yours. 

After a moment, he turns his back to you, waving a dismissive hand over his shoulder.

“Nevermind __, forget I said anything.”

“No Miguel, I’m not just gonna let this go. I want a proper explanation.”

Approaching him, you place a hand on his shoulder, fully intending to turn him to face you when, in a swift couple of movements, he’s grasped your wrist and flipped you around, your back now pressed up against the large console in front of him. 

Miguel now looms over you, eyes roaming slowly across your face and front. 

“Miguel, what-...”

“Aye coño, I had planned to keep this to myself. You just make everything so difficult, huh?”

You find yourself mesmerized by his low tone of voice and the intoxicating crimson of his irises, such that you’re unable to respond immediately. 

“E-explain Miguel.”

The man gives an exasperated roll of his eyes, caging you in with his hands on either side of you. 

“Useful though you may be, you’re certainly not the brightest crayon in the box, hm?”

You scoff, rightfully offended. 

“If this is your way of flirting, you’re going to seriously have to get better about it.” 

Miguel chuckles, and the sound makes you smile slightly despite yourself. 

“Is that so? Well then, I suppose you’ll have to give me pointers. You know best what tactics work on you after all.”

You begin to speak, before your eyes widen in realization. 

“Wait, you were actually flirting with me? But you just insulted me! Like, two or three times in the span of fifteen minutes. The way you talk, it sounds like you don’t even like me.”

Miguel hums, bringing a gloved palm up to cup your cheek. 

“Ah, my sweet __, you’re so simple. It’s adorable.”

You’re not entirely sure why, but when Miguel’s thumb subconsciously nears your mouth, you bite down on it with some force, causing the man to yank the digit away.

He stares at his thumb for a moment, which glistens slightly with a bit of your saliva, before leveling you with an incredulous look. 

“You bit me.”

You nod. 

“I did. And you totally deserved it. As a matter of fact, I should have bitten you even harder.”

You humph, a little grin curling your mouth. 

It’s quiet between you for a moment, before Miguel does something that frankly shocks you. 

He brings the bitten finger up to his mouth, licking over it slowly while maintaining eye contact with you. 

You can’t deny that the action makes you feel…things, and you’ve little time to react before Miguel has caged you in again, a smirk shaping his infuriatingly handsome face. 

“I never took you for a biter.”

This time though, you’re better prepared for the close proximity. 

“There’s a lot you’ve yet to discover about me, Gigi.”

The distance between the two of you is subconsciously closing, your lips getting closer and closer. 

You can see Miguel’s irises slowly turning scarlet, the color bright and piercing. When next he opens his mouth to speak, you can see the beginnings of sharp fangs dropping from his upper gum line. 

“Really? Well, I’d be interested in getting to know all about you, muñeca.”

You snort quietly, before deciding to bite the bullet and pull Miguel in for a, frankly overdue, kiss. 

The two of you stay connected in your lip lock for quite a few moments, tongues gently exploring one another. You teasingly graze your tongue over the, unbeknownst to you, sensitive film of Miguel’s fangs. 

The action causes the man to moan, and the sound travels straight between your legs. 

Pulling away, Miguel touches his forehead to yours, chuckling breathlessly. 

“Considering you’ve already had your opportunity, I think it’s only fair that I return the favor.”

Before you can inquire about what Miguel means, he quickly leans up and nips at your bottom lip with his fangs, licking soothingly over the plump flesh right after. 

Your giggle at the action evolves into full blown laughter as you double over, jokingly pushing at Miguel’s shoulder. 

“Such a tease Gigi. But sure,” you playfully flick his nose.

“You’re free to take a bite as often as you like.”

[softpine]

can i just word vomit for a min...

there was a point in late 2023 where i felt like i overstayed my welcome on simblr and i planned on just wrapping frozen pines up as quickly as possible and moving on. continuing to write when it's clear that the audience for it is dwindling felt so embarrassing that i almost didn't even want to put effort into it anymore, because i was afraid it just looked pathetic (obligatory disclaimer: no one made me feel this way, you're all so lovely, it's just the nature of seeing a community change over 7 years). writing already feels very personal to me and it's becoming increasingly harder for me to put my work out there (again, for reasons unrelated to simblr and entirely related to mental illness 🤙🏻). i know my story is so long that it deters new readers, and so sporadic that it makes old readers drop off with time. this has really been bothering me lately because i don't know what i can do to fix it. i don't think there IS anything i can do.

but. okay. don't make fun of me for saying this. dan and phil returning to youtube kinda changed my mindset? they may be pulling a fraction of the views they got in their peak, but they're happier than they've ever been and they're working on things they actually want to do, not things they think will be particularly popular. seeing that has made me realize that it is possible to keep finding joy in a community that has largely moved on without you. obviously my little blog is nowhere near the same scale, so this feels kind of silly, but i've been thinking about all the things i used to do on simblr that were never fun for me, i mainly did them because i knew they would get notes or because i felt like i had to do it. making cc, lookbooks, sim requests, reshade help (oh my god the reshade help), lot downloads, etc. they DID get notes, but i can't imagine spending my time doing any of that stuff ever again tbh.

on top of that, it makes me sad to scroll through my dash and realize that i don't recognize most of the people i see anymore. i still talk to some wonderful people here who i consider friends and that's invaluable to me (💖), but the broader community aspect is something i no longer feel a part of. and believe me, i know i'm at fault here because it's not like i'm going out of my way to talk to new people or participate in trends like i used to. i don't blame anyone except the passage of time!!

frozen pines, and simblr by extension, played such a gigantic part in my life when i needed it the most. and that's not to say that i don't still care about it, because i absolutely do, but it's a different kind of feeling. i've always promised that i would give frozen pines a satisfying conclusion rather than silently abandoning it someday, and though i do intend to keep that promise, i know it's possible that i might never get there. but i don't want to let my own insecurities get in the way of something i really enjoy doing. writing is an intrinsic piece of me that i'll never quit doing, but sharing my writing on tumblr is something that can't (and shouldn't) last forever. i know that. but i'm going to enjoy it to the fullest while we're all still here together 💞

to anyone who's still reading my silly story after all these years (especially those of you who still check in on my blog even though you're not on simblr anymore): thank you thank you thank you THANK YOUUU. you don't have to change a single thing about what you're doing. this is not me fishing for compliments or putting down an ultimatum, this is just me trying to make sense of my feelings.

but with all this being said, i've decided to quit simblr and start my own exclusive streaming service for $60 a year, i hope you'll all support me as i increase my production value 😌

(just kidding. ily. okay that's all)