#that fake tenderness gives me chills

[lady-buggerinton]

My Top Five Polin Scenes in Part One (and why!)

My darling gossipers, so far this show is making literally all of my hopeless romantic dreams for this couple come true and who knows what kind of angst and drama were in for in part two, so before things gets too real I just wanted to go into (too much) depth on my favorite scenes and a few swoon-worthy details from part one! *whips reigns on carriage* shall we?

5. Drawing Room Lesson/Journal

Pen's brain: TOUCH ALERT! HIS HAND IS ON MY BACK.

This scene is so best friend coded with the way they are bantering and flirting the whole time. There's an adorable contrast between Penelope's fear of being discovered and Colin being like it's chill!(when in fact it is not Chill because they get interrupted after 5 minutes of gazing into each others eyes)

He just clearly wanted to be completely alone and behind closed doors platonically with his very beautiful friend (who looks like an angel in this scene) to pretend they are courting. Nothing suspicious about that!

I love how he's so into the lesson to the point that he has set out the lemonade as a prop and brought her to Bridgerton house in the first place specifically because she said it was where she was most comfortable (previously, but he's doing his best, and probably hoping she will become comfortable again, ouch)

Colin being the "dashing suitor" for her to flirt with (loser) and when she's resistant to fake flirting with him he hits her with the, "you don't have to be embarrassed, you know me!" trying to put her at ease. And he succeeds! Penelope is so comfortable during this scene when she's opening up about how it's hard for her to get her personality across, it's so sweet and honest.

And this is when the ROMANCING really starts, I love how it's Penelope who takes the lead here. mostly by accident, but the poor man is still left in shambles.

I do kind of wish for this scene they had gone with a more back and forth flirting moment, and seen them both get a little taste of how overtly flirting with each other would feel rather than her little poetic moment, but it was sweet to see her expose a corner of her feelings for him and watching him get a tad flustered at the compliment.

Ok, while it was rather uncool of her to read his journal, I love this part so much. Because I am no better, I would 100 percent do this given the chance. Her examining the space where he spends time, her running her hand over his pirate coat, (who wouldn't) the quiet yearning of that action. As a snoop myself, this was wish fulfillment.

Penelope being hit with a confusing mix of jealousy and intrigue by the contents of the journal entry, the way she stops reading for just a second and then gives in and devours his writing, not being able to hold back from getting inside his head. Don't think about how she probably missed his letters.

Colin's anger here is warranted, and I liked how he didn't come across as aggro-angry Colin from the books but is still justifiably upset that his privacy has been violated. He is likely aware that there are certain DETAILS he wouldn't want her to be reading, like how he's a lonely lonely sad little man trying to be rakish and roguish because his beautiful platonic friend isn't writing him back and encouraging him like she usually does.

Can I just mention that bandaging a wound is an excellent trope and it's such a good romancing vehicle: the care, the tenderness, the touching! the GRUMPINESS! But my favorite thing about the wound bandaging is his reaction to her complimenting his work, of which he hasn't shown ANYONE. He's just so shocked that she likes it, and clearly starved for her encouragement/anyone to be interested in his travels.

I think its also worth noting that this is THE moment that Colin thinks back to when he's considering activating his chaos tendencies by rolling up to the red ball to interrupt her proposal, so I'm gonna interpret that as him recalling his first realization/admittance to himself that he has feelings for her beyond friendship.

It wouldn't surprise me since it is after this moment that we see the hints of jealousy start to manifest at the full moon ball (looking for her, asking her if she likes a suitor, he's not subtle with it). Can't blame him, he was just touched with intimacy and care, and told his creative outlet is well-written, he is being ROMANCED to the max and he can't handle it.

We also have our first "please" as Pen asks to help, and as we will see, these two can't say no to each other once the magic word is spoken! I hope this theme makes a comeback in part two (please please please)

4. Market Scene

ok, besides a semi-silly looking wig on Colin (reshoots) this scene is first of all, so beautiful.

SHE IS SO FINE IN THIS SCENE I CAN'T EVEN THINK. She looks like a preraphaelite painting and I'm gnawing at the bars of my enclosure.

I literally kept saying "wow" out loud. It actually makes the scene very silly to me because she keeps talking about how she'll never snag a husband and I'm over here on one knee begging for a chance.

If Penelope has been Colin's cheerleader and #1 supporter for their whole friendship, this is where that flips. This scene is all about Pen feeling dejected about her prospects and Colin trying to lift her spirits -basically by saying she doesn't need to work on anything because he already likes her so much without her doing anything but I digress!

There is nothing hotter than your crush talking about a shared memory! Literally nothing! You can see her absolutely light up here when he talks about their first meeting like "I can't believe he remembered" and "Shit, I'm trying to not be in love" and it makes me ache for her.

I am very sad we didn't get a meet cute flashback (hello romcom!!) but this was the next best thing. He's also definitely still in Rake Mode with the way he is being charming and flirty, but there is a core of genuine feeling here as he is trying to get her find her confidence and be more like the non-self conscious children they once were. I believe a lot of the rift between them was directly because she had such strong feelings for him and couldn't just connect with him as friends due to the pedestal she put him on, this scene shows that without that as a barrier, they are able to connect much more naturally.

"Living for the estimation of others is a trap, once you break free the world opens up," he says, and he's starting to realize this idea but hasn't quite put it into practice. I think seeing Penelope struggling to be something she's not, just like he is, shows him how it's not working for either of them. This I think kickstarts his self-reflection and eventual rejection of external pressures later on, leaving him open to pursue other passions.

Ok but what I LOVE most in this scene is his subtle digging for information about her that she isn't forthcoming with. He asks her why she wants a husband and where she feels most comfortable, peppering her with questions and also giving her zero personal space. He's very curious about her and what is going on inside, but she's not exactly open with him at this point, giving short and simple answers.

She's genuinely not used to someone asking her this many questions about herself, receiving this kind of devoted attention, and she clearly doesn't know quite how to respond. In fact, the dynamic has always been reversed, where she was encouraging and inquiring about him, so this switch is just excellent. there have been little moments throughout the series where he asks about her and she always seems to deflect to talking more about him, so it's nice to see this shift.

Also fun detail, the grecian statues behind them are a little nod to the eros and psyche vibes of the scene as cupid is trying to find a match for his psyche, but is slowly beginning to fall for her, his curiosity the first step towards total downfall.

When he asks about Eloise is where Pen just completely shuts down and says she has to leave, and the "before we are noticed" with the little smile? I have fallen in love. She's clearly using that as an excuse to dodge the question, and it is almost an inside joke, sadly. As if she's saying "No one would believe you are courting me anyway haha". And yet he's clearly bummed she's leaving, he was having such a good time, and she leaves him hanging, wanting to know more. I also absolutely love the Rae side eye, lethal!

3. Candy Tent

Post-kiss insanity is on full display here. The way she beckons him with a sexy head tilt and he came running, the way his hands give away his nervousness and his eyes keep locking on her helplessly. Just FULL ON crush mode. The soft "How are you?" he missed her!

Also outfits are incredible here, the pearls in the hair, the painted vest, Colin inventing the color brown, it's a rococo dream. The plushy pink of the tent, the ambiance, everything is just in a word: sumptuous? never used that but it feels right here.

Pen's giddiness here is just adorable, she's experiencing blatant interest for the first time and I couldn't be happier for her. But someone else is very peeved, indeed. He's trying to play the part of supportive friend while also just kind of feeling a lot of "confounding feelings"

The way he is trying to be so casual and attempting to keep up his swagger, but his true feelings are showing through BAD kind of harkens back to how Pen would interact with Colin in s1 and 2, with barely contained affection and hope. The script has been FLIPPED and it feels so good!!

I literally squeal every time he asks her if she's formed an attachment to Debling, this is the shit I signed up for!! Her saying Debling is not "unpleasant to gaze upon" and watching Colin just completely glitch out with jealousy. He's like AND WHAT ABOUT ME! Must be frustrating to be the most eligible bachelor of the season, and yet your very beautiful crush friend is complementing another man on his looks. When your crush expresses interest in someone it can be truly insanity inducing, so I feel for him here.

Pen is oblivious completely, she doesn't think any of what she is saying is negatively affecting him, in fact she thinks this news will make him happy! His lessons worked, she didn't care about being perceived and it is having the desired affect! and yet, he's miserable. Mission accomplished unsuccessfully if you will.

He does ALMOST a good job of hiding his feelings, but if Pen were not completely convinced he couldn't have feelings for her, I think she would've picked up on the vibes here. He's way less enthusiastic about the lessons, and is giving fairly curt responses, when before he was yapping on about being yourself and such.

Then of course the blatant staring at her mouth, being the yearning sort of man he is and likely recalling their kiss in detail, reminder it's been at least a week since. She's romancing him without even trying. It also makes sense for "food motivated" Colin to have Penelope + cake equals critical override of his facial expressions and his literally standing there slack-jawed with lust.

His soft "good luck", when she leaves and the fact that he doesn't mean it AT ALL.

I've seen it talked about, but it makes a lot of sense that Penelope wasn't as affected by the kiss as he was. I'm sure she enjoyed it, but for her the kiss was an end (more on that later) and for him it was the moment he admitted his feelings (which were already growing slowly). so it makes sense the yearning is very colin-sided in this scene.

Apart from the yearning, it's also just sweet to see them in cahoots and discussing this development with Debling like its a little group project, and its the perfect scene to show Down Bad Colin, and I love it. She also clearly wants him to share with her in her success, still wanting to be close to him in any way she can, which if I think about too much I'll cry.

Bonus points for him eating the cake later on, such an intimate detail, he just wants to be close to her in any way he can. CRIMINAL! ARREST HIM!

2. First kiss/Dream Sequence

Ok I'm combining these scenes because they happen back to back and sort of like a mirror of each other, sue me. This first kiss scene is, as Whistledown says, RECKLESS. It's nonsensical, it's desperate, and it's beautiful.

This scene has only improved upon rewatches, it really has everything. Best kiss scene on Bridgerton and possibly in anything ever? no doubt no doubt?

The silly back and forth on the "You're not going to die" and the way she doesn't back down when he seems to get embarrassed, but instead says what? The Magic Word! "Please" she says, which of course is both of their activation word. His expressions here definitely mirror the book, where as soon as she asks him to kiss her, he's a bit taken aback by how much he realizes he wants to already.

This is such a low moment for Penelope, and it's one parts embarrassing and two parts brave of her to ask him to kiss her. In her position, she doesn't even have her pride left, so why not ask the boy you love to kiss you? nothing will come of it anyway, and he probably won't even do it, so why not ask? And what are friends for!

then the moment comes, and the music swells, as does the tension as he closes the distance between them, her shocked face and shallow breaths as she realizes its actually going to happen, the way he lifts her face to his with his hand under her chin. It's just pure romance. and this thing between them, this space that has never been crossed, is being crossed, and it feels insane. reckless. intimate!!

What I love is the shot that focuses on his face after they deepen the kiss, he's intent and confused by how good this feels, how little like kindness this is for him as soon as their lips touch. Like we will see later, he just kind of mind-blanks and forgets what is happening.

Whatever he thought they were has just crumbled with this kiss, and he leans his forehead against hers, no awkwardness when there is such tenderness. which is why he's so shook when she whispers "thank you", and rushes off. he's like "wait why is she thanking me? where am I? weren't we doing something here?" The hopeful strings as it focuses on his dumbstruck face, the earth literally shifting under his feet in that moment. UNREAL.

THE DREAM: I won't say a lot about the dream sequence but I just had to throw it in here because it shows how aligned they are romantically. They are both HUGE romantics, and he has orchestrated this sort of do-over kiss where he's really going for it and proving to her that he wants this too, he wants her. And she's enjoying herself, clearly, which we know is something Colin wants more than anything. It's a great way to show his inner feelings with the lack of an inner monologue that a book brings. And this is clearly a sort of parody of Bridgerton itself, or at least the books. It's over the top, a little silly, and exactly what we all want to see.

This dream also isn't just ripping off clothes, it's emotional, a key element is him expressing how he's been thinking about her, consumed by her. This kiss also isn't as innocent and patient as the first kiss, and it's full of Reciprocation, she can't stop thinking about him either. AND NEITHER CAN I!!!

Both of these kiss scenes also set up our contrasting feelings, where Pen views their first kiss as an end of a dream, a bittersweet act to finally let go off him, the dream of him. And then his dream shows the opposite, how she's ignited something in him that begins his dream of her, awake and asleep. Dream-swap! Also the hand on the wall behind her to catch her from hitting the wall. no comment.

1. Carriage Scene

Yeah like what can I say! It's incredible! I honestly have no idea how they can top this scene, but honestly if this is the best love scene they share in the season I am 10000% content. All of my little qualms with how they did the season melt away when I watch this scene because this was what was crucial to nail and they NAILED IT. TO THE WALL BABY. YAY.

And how did he gain access to the carriage (and Penelope)?? by saying please!! we love the magic word!! I do like the confession a lot, especially the "what if I did have feelings for you?" and the way he gets to his KNEES, a truly inspired moment.

How he completely dies inside when she says they are friends, and still accepts it with grace. There were SO many obstacles to him expressing his feelings to her this night, and he just red rovered each one, and we are all very grateful.

Something about this scene is just built different, I like a lot of the love scenes in the show, but this one has some kind of secret ingredient that we didn't know we'd been missing. Maybe its the location, the context, the way they are just grasping at each other desperately (which if you think about how Penelope thought this was a one time thing in the books and she wanted to make the most of it, actually don't think about that)

He's also just so sweet about it, he's not angry, or insistent, he's just honest and intent. and she's just bewildered and INTO IT.

The lightning is gorgeous, the way it looks like Penelope is catching on fire and glowing. the catharsis, the giving into passion. The way she smiles like her dreams are coming true (because they are) before he just completely attacks her. What else can I say but EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

so many of the kisses are so tender and gentle, and they just build and build and build in intensity as they get lost in each other.

on a more horny note, so many moments here actually make me physically roll my eyes back in my head with how insane they make me. The desperate boob grab, the consensual nod, the way his hand slips under her dress, they were truly so insane for this. something tells me they knew I've waited literal years for this, so they knew they had to make it good.

Someone said Nicola should get an Emmy nom for moans, and she should, somehow they don't come across as cartoonish at all, and it doesn't take me out of the scene like some "noise making" does in these types of scenes. and for the record I'm not jealous at all, of either of them. in fact, no sooner did my head hit the pillow that I was met with complete and total darkness....not even a dream....

Like everything I could say has already been said, but it was so much better than I thought it was going to be, blew my expectations out of the water and DELIVERED. and DEVOURED. and RUINED ME. AND I AM VERY GRATEFUL.

Anyway that's all, I'm very afraid for part two so I needed some escapism, why am I already nostalgic for the good ol' times when Polin was happy for 6 minutes. thanks for reading! <3

[tookhimtomypenthouse]

Hate Yourself - Chapter Two

series warnings: female!reader x oliver quick, past/implied felix x oliver, dub-con, stalker behavior, voyeurism, degradation, dacryphilia, bloodplay, gaslighting, manipulation, untagged story elements (the warnings aren't exhaustive!), DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT bbgirl

summary: you’re hired as a maid after Oliver comes to own Saltburn, and find your employer to be very invested in your work

minors dni!

Lyuba had left this morning. She hugged you tightly before stepping into her cab, much to your surprise. The normally stern woman was unexpectedly tender with you that morning.

“Take care, zayka,” she whispered as she held you. “Don’t let this house devour you,” she added before pulling away and walking to her cab. 

You shiver at the thought, her words chilling. You try to ignore the eeriness of her warning as you dust the study. Dusting was gentle work and a welcome reprieve from scrubbing and scouring the other rooms. Plumes of dust kicked up by your duster shimmer in the late afternoon sunbeams, and you catch yourself watching them float around. The study is full of dusty spots – tall bookshelves, busts of important men, and an overstuffed upholstered chair. Your focus is on the chair when you look up to see one of the many hanging frames of art. 

Unlike most art decorating Saltburn, the frame doesn’t hold a stuffy oil painting of a king or lord. Instead, a sketch of a handsome young man looks back. His soft eyes and nonchalant pose invite you in. His clothes seem modern, his messy hair unfussy and tousled. The strokes of charcoal are loose and messy, giving the impression the subject wasn’t as buttoned-up as the rest. Who might he be? In the corner was the artist’s signature, a delicate cursive EC. You search around the perimeter of the sketch for a name, but there’s nothing else. Only the kind, mysterious face.

“Keep your secret, then,” you fake pout to the sketch. You’re pulled out of your examination by clicking footsteps from the hallway. You keep at your dusting, but you hear someone come into the study and rifle through the stack of papers on the desk. Turning your head, you see Oliver sit down and shuffle through a few documents, concentrating deeply on his task. Plucking up some unknown courage, you decided to soothe your burning curiosity.

“Pardon me, sir,” you start, faltering a bit as his eyes connect with yours, “but do you know who this is?”

Oliver pauses as his attention moves to the frame. A sad smile ghosts over his mouth. “Ah,” he says gently. “That would be Felix Catton.” He returns to his task at the desk, but he seems distracted.

“D-do you know him?” You ask, curiosity piquing at his visible reaction.

“I did,” he starts, stepping back from the desk and approaching the picture. “We were…mates.” He’s close now, close enough that your shoulders touch. “Met at Oxford.”

You feel your brows furrow. He’s not giving enough detail for your tastes. “How did he get a picture on the wall if he’s just a mate? There must be more to it than that.” You try and meet his eye, but he is fixated on the image. 

“His family owned this place. He invited me to stay for a summer back when we were in university and died at the birthday party they threw for me here. In the maze.” He angles his head back to you, an unreadable expression on his features. 

“Oh,” you mumble, “I’m so sorry.” An uncomfortable silence envelops you for a moment. You remember Lyuba’s clipped warning in the bathroom, and you aren’t sure how to react.

“The rest of his family followed,” he finally offers, “so his mother left me Saltburn when she passed.” The revelation surprises you, but it makes sense. You had never seen his surname in the numerous journals, paintings, or statues that graced the halls. It seems odd that an Oxford pal came to own this massive estate. Then again, you’re just a maid. Rich people do crazy things like give away houses to friends, right? Maybe people like Lyuba and you could never understand. The few precious things you own you guard fiercely, but finery probably doesn’t seem as precious when you’re constantly surrounded by it. You can understand the grief on his face, though. His prolonged, desperate look at the drawing makes your chest twinge with sadness. 

“Wow,” you whisper. “You must miss him terribly.” The weight of his gaze rests squarely on you. His presence feels suffocatingly close, especially because everyone else has so far made themselves scarce. You haven’t had someone so near to you since Lyuba left. You fight the urge to lean in even closer. 

“Sometimes,” he admits. He lingers next to you for a moment longer before stepping back to the desk and grabbing a sheet of paper. You shake your head quickly and return to dusting, hearing his footsteps move out the door and down the hallway. You give the picture of Felix one last glance before busying yourself with the rest of the room.

~

Hands on your hips, you survey the pristine room. You feel a sense of satisfaction, having made it through your to-do list earlier than anticipated. Making your way back to your room, you decide to reward yourself with a soak in the bathtub. A hot bath. The thought alone is enough to bring a dreamy smile to your lips. The days of work haven’t been too exhausting, but your muscles are sore from adjusting to the workload.

Reaching your room, you rifle through your drawers. Grabbing out your pajamas and socks, you move on to the underwear drawer.

That’s…strange.

You rifle through the contents frantically. Where did they all go? You know you brought more than this. Only a few pairs are left. You shake your head, trying to be rational. They’re just in another drawer, you tell yourself. Hands shaking slightly, you paw through all the drawers in your dresser. By the final one, your breathing comes in raggedly, and your vision blurs with tears.

“What the fuck?” You feel sick to your stomach. Who had been in your room? Suddenly, you feel very vulnerable, too exposed. You rush to the door and try to lock it. The handle jiggles uselessly. A sob breaks from your throat as you sink to the ground. Everything feels like too much.

You miss home, your shoebox room with the ugly brown shag carpet and the tiny window to nowhere. You miss your mother, the twins, your friends. It’s so lonely here. Everyone keeps their distance, and now the one sanctuary you have to yourself feels tainted. Unsafe. If you could go back home, you would.

But you couldn’t. Well, wouldn’t. The private school the twins attend has steep fees, and Mum’s cashier job isn’t cutting it. You think she has enough to worry about as tears flow down your face freely. 

“Pull it together,” you choke out to yourself. It was probably a cruel prank, hazing the new girl. You won’t let them send you back home with your tail between your legs. You’d give your siblings a shot at a life beyond the dreary little town you grew up in. They wouldn’t have to clean other people’s houses if you had any say. Peeling yourself off the ground, you resolved to take your bath. Fuck it, you weren’t going to give up so easily. You could take the silent treatment and other nonsense if it meant a future for them.

Clutching your things, you walk to the bathtub and run the water. You can’t help but feel the hair on the back of your neck stand up, but ignore the feeling. I’m just overthinking, it’s fine. You slip out of your work dress and slide into the steamy bath. You bring your head underneath the water, heat soothing your puffy and tearstained face. You weren’t going to let this place break you.

It’s too bad the person peering through the bathroom keyhole would disagree.

~

You sleep terribly. 

The broken lock and missing panties have rattled you despite your best efforts. You spend your nights watching the door, muscles twitching in anticipation of a confrontation that never comes. Each morning, an increasingly wan face stares back at you in the mirror. 

You decide to do something about it. Your distant coworkers have offered you nothing but wary glances and clipped responses the whole time you’ve been here, so you feel certain it had to be one of them. A good boss would want his employees to feel comfortable here, so you make it your mission to bring it up with Oliver once you finish your tasks for the day.

You wander the house looking for him, nervously popping your head into every room. You don’t think he has business outside the house today, so you get increasingly worked up with each empty room. When you end up back in the foyer with no sign of him, you stomp out into the garden. It’s dark and chilly out, but you can’t even care. You just want somewhere private to scream. The maze beckons you. You’ve never had a chance to go inside, so you trudge right inside it.

The twists and turns are dark and disorienting. You feel your anger ebb away into fear as you make your way deeper. The cold nips at you, but you press on. How much time has even passed here? You’re tempted to turn around and try and find the exit when you see a clearing. You press onward, unsure of what lies ahead. You notice a huge statue, its form monstrous but somewhat amorphous to you in the darkness of the night. It looms menacingly over the space, filling you with dread. 

You hear rustling and nearly jump out of your skin when you realize you aren’t alone.

“W-who is it?” You call out, voice trembling. You cast your eyes around and see a man’s form in the corner.

“It’s just me,” comes the response, and you almost sigh with relief at the sound of Oliver’s voice. You sheepishly walk to him, relaxing at the edge of the clearing. “Are you alright, love?” He peers up at you with concern. 

You try to clear your throat and give a nonchalant response, but your voice comes out brittle and pinched. “Of course,” you rasp out, faltering. You don’t even realize the tears are coming out until Oliver hops to his feet and gently swipes his thumb over your cheek. The unexpectedly tender gesture has all of your exhaustion and worries pouring out.

“Hey,” he breathes, gently cupping your face.

“I’m sorry,” you sob, crying into his hands. “I haven’t been well. Someone broke my lock, a-and stole my clothes, and-“

“Woah, woah, woah, it’s okay,” he soothes, stepping in close and wiping your face. “Someone stole from you?”

“Y-yeah,” you reply.

“I’ll get the door fixed, yeah? And replace what got taken.”

“Really?” you ask, a spark of hope returning to you.

“Of course, I hate to see such a pretty girl upset,” he answers, stroking your hair. He gives you a gentle smile, and you can’t help but give him a teary smile in response. “Now, run along inside. It’s cold out here.”

“Okay,” you mumble, sniffing and drying off the last of your tears. You turn back to the entrance and walk slowly, mulling over his words. Maybe somebody does care about you here.

“Get some rest, please,” he calls after you. “I can’t have my best girl so sad.”

You stifle a giggle as you trace your way back out of the maze, slightly delirious from the attention and unexpected tears. Maybe you really will get some sleep tonight.

~

[sixlane]

Newlyweds

Jegulus microfic | 830 words | A little Mr & Mrs Smith au thingy for u | pt. 2, pt. 3

“So… what’s your favorite color?” James asks. They’re meant to be getting to know each other but the agency told them not to reveal any identifying information. This is the best he could come up with.

Regulus raises an eyebrow, unamused. James knew it was a stupid question. He’s about to take it back when Regulus looks down at his plate and says, “green, like a dark green. Almost black.”

James hums, studying the way the man in front of him cuts his food into even pieces. He thinks he could learn a lot more about Regulus by just watching him rather than asking superficial questions. Regulus likes order. Noted.

After a minute of silence, broken only by the scraping of silverware, James speaks again.

“Now it’s your turn to ask a question. See, we’re doing a back and forth thing here. Swapping secrets. If we’re going to be fake married we have to know things about each other.”

Regulus doesn’t miss a beat. “I already know everything I need to know about you, James.” 

James scoffs. This is going to be the longest mission of his life. He’s known Regulus for all of an hour and he’s barely gotten five full sentences out of him.

“Ok, tell me three things you know about me. If you get something wrong, I get to ask you anything I want.”

Regulus sets his knife and fork down neatly next to his plate. He wipes his mouth, clears his throat, and looks up at James, pinning him with an icy gray stare. For a second, James loses his breath to the chill. Regulus’ eyes slide over him, stopping at his lips for a brief moment, but James catches it all the same.

“You’re an only child, you’re rich already so you’re not in this for the money, and you’ve been married before, maybe recently. I’d probably even say that’s why you’re here.” Regulus takes a sip from his wine glass, not looking away from James as he does it.

“How did you… Did the supervisor tell you about me? Because that’s not fair I didn’t get anything on y—” 

Regulus cuts him off with a hand. “You’ve been talking incessantly since the second I got here. Attention seeking behavior. Only child. That was probably the biggest stretch but I figured I’d give it a shot. You’re wearing an Armani sweater, so that one wasn’t even hard, and you have a tan line around your left ring finger. Is the divorce even finalized yet?”

James just stares, mouth parted in an attempt to form literally any word from the wide array of languages he knows. Nothing comes, though.

“Aren’t you supposed to be a spy, James? This is day one stuff.” Regulus goes back to his meal. A curl of his hair falls briefly in front of his eyes and he brushes it back with elegant fingers. 

James doesn’t think he’s ever been speechless in this life. All he can think to say is, “the divorce is finalized.” 

“Did you love them?”

Well, that was unexpected. He answers anyway. “Yes”

“Do you still love them?”

“No, not anymore,” James mutters, looking down. It’s true but that doesn’t mean it’s not still tender.

“Good.”

James shoots a look at Regulus then, incredulous. “Good?” he asks. “Why is that good?”

“No attachments, James. It’s bad business.” He says it so casually, so plainly, but James can see a twitch between his brows. This hits home for him too.

“You forget, honey, we’re married now. It’s me and you ‘till the end. We’re ‘attached’ for life.” He smirks, wanting to move the conversation away from lost loves. Hoping the humor will smooth the tension in Regulus’ face.

“We’re fake married, James. Partners. That’s it.” He’s looking up at James through jet black lashes and James finds himself thinking about running his fingers lightly across them. Counting every one until he runs out of numbers. 

“It doesn’t have to be.” Okay, maybe he’s flirting now. So what? If they’re going to be stuck together he might as well make it interesting.

“Yes it does.” Regulus says, but James doesn’t miss how a slight flush creeps onto his cheeks. “We’re doing this by the book. It’s easier that way, trust me.”

“Oh I'm not worried about me, Regulus. I can keep my hands to myself. Don’t think I haven’t missed the way you’ve been looking at my mouth, though. I can be observant, too.”

Regulus looks away, obviously flustered, and James preens internally for getting a reaction out of him.

“I’m going to bed,” Regulus says, getting up. 

Before he’s out of the room, James responds. “Alright, love. Let me know if you want some company. You know where to find me.”

Regulus stops. It’s too long of a pause, almost like he’s considering the offer, but he doesn’t look back. “Goodnight, James,” he whispers before heading up the stairs, and James swears he hears a smile in it.

[milgram-tournament]

MILGRAM Best Song Tournament, Round 1, Match 9 CAT vs. THE PURGE MARCH

Propaganda for both options under the cut!

Propaganda for CAT:

"You like jazz? Jazz is chaos within order. Got to love the whole band. Vibraphone, saxophone, trumpet, flute, piano, guitar, drums, bass… Go, rhythm section, go! The song sounds tender at times and aggressive at others as different instruments pop up at different times. Sometimes they follow Kazui’s voice (“follow the king of the masquerade”). Sometimes they get to be the focus. You have the chill piano one moment and the screaming guitar in the next.

You’ve got a lovely “jingle” (“Lie until it gets better…”) which occurs at the beginning, middle, and end. It fits the “newspaper ad” style of the video really well. Also at the very end, there’s one more line that gives the jingle an upward contour, giving a sense of finality. “Until you can meet the king of the masquerade.” You’re there now.

The two verses start off differently before they take on a similar melody. It feels like Kazui is talking to a different person in each verse.

The chorus is a beautiful façade the first time and a sinister truth the second time.

The opening for solos shows that this jazz song means business. I love how the saxophone and trumpet especially get in your face. And with the tacet on vocals, the walking bass really shines if you lend it your ear.

And the smoke break! Silence is golden. Glass click. Lighter. Huff.

As always, Kazui’s voice is super deep. He hits even lower notes this time around. He’s a fifth lower than the next lowest singers (Haruka and Shidou)."

---

-Great instrumental choice. Kazui and jazz is *chefs kiss*

-Symbolism. THE SYMBOLISM. I can’t type out all my thoughts but ifykyk

-The almost comic like style of the MV is really appealing.

-Lyrics!! There is so much to unpack but it’s really cool.

-Kazui eating the dove… fricken iconic.

---

FIRST OF ALL the vocals????? BEAUTIFUL. His va put his whole pussy into this song and you can tell!! The way he sings the chorus is so damn addicting I'm so in love with him. His voice is more or less stable throughout the entire thing until the final chorus but you can hear the emotion peaking out which fits perfectly with Kazui keeping everything hidden. The way his voice turns into a sort of whisper during "all the things I wanna do that I can't say outloud"??? The way his voice starts trembling during "this feeling it's yearning to be satisfied"???? The way his voice turns into a sort of whisper AND starts trembling during "hey, if I said I liked-liked you, what would you?"?????? HEAVENLY! You can really feel how afraid Kazui is under his disguise and my heart breaks a little everytime I listen. Not to mention how absolutely powerful his voice gets at the climax!!!!!! It's insane!!!!!!! It's genius!!!!!! It makes me wild makes me crazy makes me eat my walls!!!!!!!!!!

THE SMOKE BREAK?????? What other song has something as powerful as that huh???? This isn't just a song produced by the milgram machine using his memories, this is HIS song and he is OWNING IT! The music builds up so much and gets so intense right before it, I can literally feel myself get tense and starting holding my breath right before he takes the break and everything relaxs… it's not just a break for him, but a break for the viewer. The song is spiralling out of control just like his life and his lies and he has no choice but to put it to a quick stop before its too much to handle.

THE IMAGERY IS WILD!!!!! He's a magician!!! Little magic guy!!!! Using tricks and lies to amaze and captivate the people around him! Trying desperately to magic his own feelings into something else! But it's all fake! It's all tricks and no matter how hard he tries he can never actually change himself into what he wants! But he's trying to convince himself the same way he's convinced his audience!! And when you're watching a magic act, are you there for the magician themself or are you there to watch the show?? The people in his life only cared for him when he performed for them, but they didn't give a drop of love to who he was a person! ALSO the transformation of the wedding ring to a cigarette to the dove at the end??? Makes me wild every single time! Right infront of his wife, he showed her that their marriage was something unhealthy for him that was slowly killing him from the inside. AND THEN he uses it to harm himself???? And then he turns that cigarette into a dove- a representation of love and literally TEARS INTO IT. He tears his marriage apart with his mouth!!! AKA HIS WORDS. makes me wild. Also fun fact Kazui says he started smoking because when he was younger it was "just natural for everyone to smoke" and that lines up with his reasons for marriage perfectly.

Kazui looks really hot in it. You should vote for Cat because Kazui is insanely attractive. What other reason do you need huh? Hot gay middle aged man.

Propaganda for THE PURGE MARCH:

"Despite the shorter length, the Purge March has several distinct sections in its structure.

It starts with a rolloff, and then… they don’t follow it. Amane isn’t here to follow the beat.

There’s the spoken-word intro and the upbeat first verse listing the tenets. The prechorus (“dou shiyou mo nai…”) has an amen break. The most-sampled four-bar drum beat. Well, there’s half of it. Is it supposed to mean something? Can I get an amen?

The chorus is so, so cheerful… unless you’re actually listening to the lyrics (“I’ll crush your throat too”) or watching the video. And it’s super catchy. 

The second part of the verse dials things back. Now we’re in reality. This is how Amane breaks her tenets. All the while, those tenets are spoken into both ears over the singing. Get some good headphones. She sounds different in each ear.

The music picks up again with the amen break as Amane happily strolls back home, and then-

Oh.

The somber second chorus, with Amane’s lower singing voice and mournful spoken words, leads into the final chorus, with new lyrics and a more forceful tone. The once-meaningless chanting now has real words. “You’re sorry? I don’t care! Please go ahead and die already.” You can hear Amane’s anger despite the cheerful melody. She harmonizes in the final phrase, as if to say “we’re in this together, me and my little color guard troop.” And finally, it’s just her. Speaking. "Oboetemasuka?" Accompanied by only a single drum.

She is both Amane Momose and not. She upholds the doctrines that she was raised with, but she can’t."

---

"Purge March is geniunaly one of my favorite pieces of fiction both in and out of the context of trauma. Its fantastically directed and composed. The batton twirling is spetacular and energetic, the set and character design of Amane conveys a lot about the world she’s in and the story she’s telling. Purge March contextulizes a lot of Magic in both expected and unexpected ways (insert the entire cat symbolism thesis here) Purge March casts Amane in the role of a scary child. The glowing eyes, the framing of Amane as Above the viewer, the brutality and catharsis of it all. It seems tailored made to make you Scared of her. It’s a continuation of the cycle of abuse that we the audience repeated in T1 when we gave her that verdict. A red flashing warning sign about the Inhumanity and Monsterous qualities of Amane Momose. But Amane as a monster is fufilling and freeing. Again, its deeply cathartic. I would write more if I wasnt so sleepy at the moment but its just some Fantastic work overall. Purge March is also just fantasitic vocally and also hids electricity sounds in the instrumental which I think is evil and awesome."

---

-Amane’s vocals and how they slowly get more and more off the deep end is both really sad and cool to watch.

-The symbolism of the marching band and the flags. Ifykyk

-The beginning where it sounds like a propaganda TV show… really shows just how far Amane’s thinking is rooted in her cult and how that’s shaped her perception.

-The LYRICS. They work so well but it’s also creepy AF considering it’s a child who’s singing it.

-“So there is no second time, I’ll give back the judgment that you gave to me!”

-The overlapping part… gives me chills everytime.

-Building off the last point, the last “I’ll crush your throat too.” Ouch.

-“Remember MY cries, MY repents, MY words of “I’m sorry” that I said to you?”

-The song also does a great job of showing how much the guilty verdict messed with her.

[dadsbongos]

I NEED MORE RAGNVALDR SMUT THIS MAN IS MAKING ME GO CUCKOO

you n me both you n me both you n me both you n me both like!!

warnings - randomly lost the spark for this at the end and you can… tell lol, not proofread, fem body, whiny pathetic big man with big tits >>>>>, unprotected piv but liek cmon… what is the protection in that era youre lucky rag’s washed

845 words

~~~

“You’re very close.”

“You’re more comfortable than the bed.”

Ragnvaldr snorts a laugh, eyes fluttering shut as he grins, hands winding tighter around your waist and squeezing the soft fat, “You’re obsessed with flattering me, elskede.”

“You’re worth the flattery,” you lift your chin and settle it between his collar bones to stare up at the man.

Auburn strands of hair burn like gold in the pouring sunlight, soft sage eyes gooey as they return your gaze. Morning birds sing outside the gaping window, fresh air chilling through the bedroom. Last night, you’d fallen asleep side-by-side only for the man to pull you atop his chest in the dark. Or maybe he did it as the sun first rose, staring at your lax face through bleary eyes; determined not to wake you. 

Wringing both arms under Ragnvaldr’s head, you pull your face closer to his and earnestly giggle at how his cheeks go ruby red. 

“Hm, blushing is a good look for you,” you dance the blade of your nails across his sharp cheekbones, feeling the warmth from his face lick over your fingertips, “So bashful.”

“Bashful,” he scoffs at the mere notion, “I’m the strongest warrior in Oldegaard, I am not bashful.”

“No?”

“No.”

“So, then, if I do this…” you sit up slowly, making a show of petting your palms down his chest and curving your back to push out your chest, perhaps -- just by mere coincidence -- grinding your pelvis into his, “You’ll feel nothing?”

“Nothing,” the tremble in his muscles says otherwise. So does the upward, smitten twitch of his lips. His hands tighten around your waist.

Ragnvaldr is as much a lovestruck fool as he is a warrior, he’s big and simple and so, so tender in your hands. 

“Do you lie to me?” you pout, and though he knows it’s fake Ragnvaldr is tempted to smear it off your face.

He beams up at you, a chuckle rumbling low in his throat, “Of course, I’m lying. Have you seen yourself?”

You shrug coyly and he laughs again. 

“Beautiful,” Ragnvaldr stretches his neck to press his lips to your neck, “So very beautiful.” 

“Now who’s full of flattery?” you tease as hands larger and bolder than your own peel off the gown you’d slept in; Ragnvaldr lifts his hips while you fumble off his trousers.

Warmth lathes up your spine, washing over your skin in time with the softness of Ragnvaldr’s palms. He pulls and squeezes the fat of your hips in appreciation as your slick envelopes his cock. Tossing his head back in a throaty whine, Ragnvaldr bucks his hips up -- settling both feet on the creaky straw and pelts to better thrust into you. Slow and thorough, he curls both arms around your waist and binds you both chest to chest; earnestly moaning at the squish of your bare breasts against him. Leaning his head against yours, Ragnvaldr lovingly molds his lips against your forehead.

“I love you,” he proclaims, “Love,” he whines, high and pitchy and snapping into the back of his throat, “My love, my good love, sweet girl…” he shudders under your hands, pace quickening, “Please, sweet girl, kiss me.”

You should’ve known -- if you weren’t preoccupied with whimpering and wailing his name, you’d probably giggle. Ragnvaldr loves to kiss during sex, no matter how contradictory his wrapping and hugging says otherwise. You have to wiggle up from his sweaty arms to worm your face by his, kissing along his jaw just to tease your lips against the corner of his mouth.

“Please,” the big man huffs pathetically, arms cinching tighter around your body and hips rocking the thin mat below you, “Don’t be cruel to me.”

“Rag’,” you croon, finally giving him the pleasure of your lips locked to his, now mumbling against him, “My precious man, big, big man. You’re so good to me.”

His face flames beneath yours, only growing hotter the longer you speak, “Uh-huh?”

“Yes, yes,” you gasp, his cock driving harder into the spongy spot that makes you weep, “Fuck me harder, Rag’! Rougher, my love, don’t be gentle…”

“Uh-huh…” he nods weakly, and continues nodding against you -- skulls thumping dully in time with his fucking, “Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh…”

Fire rips up the seams of your tangled limbs, scorching up the loose ends of the building knots in both of your guts. Ragnvaldr tears his face back from yours, groaning and crying mixes of your name and gibberish. Gibberish until he finally crackles out,

“Can I- !" he's broken by a shiver and moan, "Can I cum inside, elskede?”

He wriggles one arm off you and in between your bodies to flick wetly around your clit. You burrow your face into the bend of his shoulder, biting the meat of his neck to muffle your swelling moans. You snag your nails into his broad chest, his soft hair tangling under your fingers, spurring you for an eager reply.

“Yes, yes, yes!” you chant dumbly, decisively numb to everything except Ragnvaldr and the ecstasy he brings.

BOOM bomb explodes you DIE!!!

[regalbootie]

Trying Something New In the Bedroom Chapter 3

Chapter 3 NSFW 18+ NO MINORS PLEASE

Larissa Weems x Reader

Warnings: NSFW, overstimulation, spanking again cos I'm a whore, shapeshifter peen, Dom Mommy.

Notes: This was requested by the lovely @marilynthornhilllover and I had also received great help with this fanfic from many people i gotta say you guys are awesome. there will be a chapter 4! it just may not be rather smutty hehehe.

Requests are still open and I'm also taking suggestions for other characters to write about so if you craving something ill give it a shot! let me know what you all think of this anyways!

You pout as the cabin slowly goes out of sight, wishing you could stay there forever with your wife. It was bliss a week of rough fucking along with some tenderness of curling up in front of the fireplace together breathing in the calmness that the homey little cabin provided.

“Oh Darling, I promise we’ll come back soon” Larissa ran a hand over your leg, her fingers drawing soothing shapes that had no meaning. Resting your head against the window and burning the memory of the scenery into your brain when you notice the car rolling to a standstill.

“what’s wrong darling?” looking over at your wife you notice a fork in the road.

“I’m just trying to remember which way to go my love” Squinting hard like she was envisioning a big sign saying this way. “I think it's right” starting to turn the car to go right you place a hand on her thigh.

“I’m pretty sure its left darling”

“No I am sure it is right” Larissa starts the car again “and I am pretty sure it is left” you scowl and let out a huff. Larissa turns to stare at you with that look that says ‘don’t be a brat right now.'

“Ok go right just don’t complain to me when you realize you went the wrong way” now it's Larissa’s turn to scowl and she takes the right turn. Smirking when she reaches the main road and lifting a brow to say ‘I told you so’.

You stick your tongue out at her and she rolls her eyes at you. The rest of the drive was smooth sailing and it was dark once the car rolled up outside the school, a storm had arrived at the same time and thunder was booming in the distance.

Jumping at the strike of lightning the two of you grab your bags as fast as possible making your way through the dim and empty school to your shared quarters. None of the teachers were arriving till tomorrow so it would just be the two of you as the grounds keeper and cleaners would be home hours ago.

Unpacking you notice Larissa is nowhere to be seen, huffing you unpack the last of everything and go hunting for your wife. Noticing a glow of light coming from under the door to her office you knock lightly as the door swing slowly open to the most beautiful sight before you.

Slowly you come up behind her as she gazes into the fireplace the fire roaring before you. Wrapping your arms around her waist resting your tired head on her back, feeling the tension release from her you lay kisses along her shoulders.

Turning in your arms you couldn’t help but smile up at her beautiful face, she was like an angel sent from heaven the fire casting a halo-like effect over her, but little did you know she was going to be the devil.

“You were being very bratty earlier darling” she pulled away from your arms and moved to sit in the armchair beside the glowing embers. “I think you should be punished for how you acted towards your mistress”

Blinking slowly, you realized what feeling she was making run through your body. The wave of excitement traveled down your spine, leaving chills all over your back. Licking your lips, faking a look of innocence for your mistress.

Patting her thigh, you slowly moved to lay across her legs, “I’m sorry Mistress.” Your core was already starting to throb with need as you lay over her like a good little pet for her.

“Oh, I don’t think sorry is going to cut it right now baby” running her hands up over your legs digging her nails in leaving red marks in her wake making you shiver and arch into her more. Reaching your core, she continues dragging her nails and suddenly rips your panties off, making you jump in her lap and even more juices gather and begging for her to taste.

A low seductive chuckle rises from Larissa it almost sounded like a growl and, you knew you were in for a real punishment tonight. Lifting your skirt, she roughly clawed up them from your core, lifting her hands to land rough spanks.

Crying out and yelping “Mommy please” you beg with her after each spank until your ass was glowing bright red and the heat from the fire was not helping with the pain, but the pleasure mixed with it was all-consuming.

“Oh, you want to please mommy? Let me see how good you're being” running her fingers through your folds, her fingers instantly drenched with your juices. Feeling her long fingers run through you was so painstakingly good, you had to stop yourself from gutting your hips back and displeasing mistress.

“Oh, look how good you’re being” licking her fingers clean moaning at how divine you tasted on her tongue. God, you wished you could suck those fingers, your thoughts earning a whimper as you stop yourself from drooling.

“Up you get” Barely giving you an opportunity to get up from her lap you fall to the floor scrambling to your feet, whimpering at the fabric of your skirt brushing against your burning cheeks.

Grabbing and pouring a glass of wine Larissa rested back into her seat, “play with yourself darling I want to see my little plaything warm herself up for me”

 A warmth runs up your face with her request and you shuffle on your feet “don’t go shy on me now, you were a whimpering messy slut just now” sipping on her whine she takes you by the waist guiding you to staddle her. Your dripping core meeting her front making it throb even more at the friction.

“Come on be good for mommy” she takes your hand with her free hand guiding it down, rubbing them over your dripping cunt. Moaning you dropped your head to rest it on her shoulder “fuck mommy” bucking your hips the new stimulation sending shock waves straight through your entire body.

“Keep going I want to watch you” She starts to strip you as you pleasure yourself over her, your fingers gliding over your core and how that you were free from clothes you used your free hand to grab your breast. Palming it as you pinched your own nipples, getting lost in the pleasure you were building you closed your eyes as your head fell back your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

Larissa couldn’t help but watch you, the way your eyebrows knitted together and the way you bit down on your bottom lip it was like a goddess had come down to bless her with your mere presence. Sipping on more wine Larissa drank all of you in her eyes roaming every inch of you.

The pleasure in you had built too quickly you didn’t think you would have been so close to cumming but here you were writhing above her gasping for air. “cum for me darling I want to see you”

All it took was those words, her voice was raspy from the wine sending that last piece of pleasure breaking the dam, a shiver running up your back. “Yes mommy” you cried out for her letting her know that she was the last piece you needed. Your hands jolted as the lingering pleasure ripped through you, slowing down once the stimulation got too much.

“oh no baby keep going” she took your hand again making you apply more pressure and picking up the speed. “It’s too much mommy” your hand falters in her grip but she keeps going making you rub your clit as your body shakes from the overstimulation.

“Let mommy help you” setting her glass down on the table beside her Larissa runs her fingers through your folds, slowly inserting her fingers inside your pussy instantly clenching around her. Biting the inside of your mouth you tried to regain your focus, the pleasure of everything was drowning you. Your eyes flutter open to look at Larissa who was licking her lips, her eyes were burning with desire, and it looked animalistic.

“Keep going until I decide you can stop lovely” her free hand guided your hips to thrust down onto her fingers. You were fucking yourself on her fingers and nothing could be hotter, you were on fire your whole body was burning up and the only thing that could fix it was those long fingers that were reaching those deep spots inside you that make your toes curl.

“Fuck mommy it feels so good” her grip tightening on your hip was strong enough to leave marks. Her other hand was still holding your hand in place making you rub your clit, moving your hand to move faster over your swollen clit.

Your legs were shaking the overstimulation was immense and not having a break between your first orgasm had you gasping and panting as your next one was building too fast for you to keep up with. She kept hitting that perfect spot in you pulling sinful moans and cries from your lips.

“God you look like a sinful mess baby” leaning forward she laid a soft kiss behind your ear making your knees buckle ever so slightly making her fingers hit even deeper. A scream of pleasure was all you could make and she attacked your neck.

She was ruthless as she bit and suck leaving deep red marks along your neck, it was unbearable the pleasure that was consuming you “Pl..please please I'm going to cum” sobbing as she bit that sensitive spot, you went ridged as you gushed over her fingers.

Screaming curses you shook, feeling like you were being torn in half with the sparks flying through your body as you came all over her fingers. “yessss just like that for mommy, let it go, ride it out”

Forcing your hips to keep moving as you shook, Larissa grinned you were a masterpiece of a mess and she was the artist. Licking over your bruised neck she slowly withdrew her fingers and it finally felt like you could breathe again and your body slumped against her.

“oh baby I am not finished with you yet” hooking her arms under your legs she stood and you scrambled to grab onto her holding tight. Your pulse quickened realizing there was more to come, your pussy was throbbing and you didn’t know how much more you could take.

You could feel the cold wood on your back as she lay you down over her desk, taking a step back to gaze over your sweat slicken body. “fuck you are so beautiful like this” your eyes were closed as you tried to catch your breath still and you could hear the faint noise of a zipper over the blood thumbing in your ears.

Next was the still new but familiar sensation of Larissa’s new favorite toy and also your new favorite, she ran her cock through your folds making sure her tip rubbed up against your clit spending more shock waves through you, jumping on the table from the over stimulation.

“Is it still too much for you baby?” Your pussy was a mess it was throbbing and spasming still and Larissa had no intentions of slowing down. Moving her shaft to your entrance she slowly pushed just her tip in, as if mirroring each other both of you had your eyes rolling back.

“Yes, mommy but it's so good” whining your answer right back at her, Larissa’s knees almost buckled with how good you felt, your over-stimulated pussy clenching around her instantly and almost pulling her over the edge. Resting her head on your shoulder she worshipped your body leaving kisses across your skin.

“Good girl” She started her thrusts going slow so she could torcher you a little longer but also so she wouldn’t cum so quickly. You were a beautiful mess below her, and she wanted to worship you, she wanted to get down on her knees and pray to your dripping temple.

“You’re my good girl baby, you’ve done so well tonight” Biting down on your ear lobe you pulled your tired arms to wrap around her running your hands through her hair and pulling her closer to you so she can continue her prayers over your skin.

She couldn’t stop touching you all over one of her hands held one of your legs so they could stay wrapped around her while the other ran over your neck caressing down to reach your breast palming it in her hand “I love your body so much darling it’s a gift from the gods just so I can defile it with my lust”

Throwing your head back whimpering you clench harder around her shaft, you loved her fingers but having her inside you filling you fulling and stretching you deliciously as your pussy wrapped around her.

Picking up the pace Larissa started to gasp and whimper as she continued her travels along your body, swapping her hand on your breast for her mouth causing you to scream out more and your legs tighten pulling her deeper within earning a thrust to that special spot deep inside nearly making you black out.

The room was filled with the sounds of slapping skin as Larissa drove deeper continuing to hit that spot now that she found it. “I... I’m going to ahh” trying to talk was so hard your brain was mush at this point and stringing a sentence together was getting more and more difficult as your walls began to tighten but Larissa knew what you were going to say, she could feel it and she wanted it so badly.

“That good baby you cum for mommy, I’m so close too I want to fill you up while you milk me dry”

The next sound you make was a scream that ripped all the air out of your lungs, it was like you could see the stars and the heavens above but you were slammed back down to earth when you heard Larissa’s growl as she came to her climax.

It was animalistic the way she drove herself deeper making sure you took every inch of her, she was drowning in you her eyes her as dark as the night sky as the lust and feel of you drove her to fill you with every drop. She was ridged as she bit down hard on your shoulder, she was shaking as the pleasure coursed through her.

It took a moment for you both to grab your breaths but having her collapsed against your body helped ground you and you couldn’t be more thankful for that. It took Larissa a minute more to come back but you didn’t mind as you curled her loose strands of hair around your fingers while the other soothingly ran up and down her back.

“That was amazing darling” huffing out a breath as she changed her core back to its natural beauty, so she didn’t hurt you by having to slide out. "you weren't so bad yourself" giggling like a child at her.

“Let's get you cleaned up” On wobbly legs, she scooped you up in her arms to carry you back to bed. Laying you so gently onto the bed and gracing your face with feather-light kisses, Larissa was always a completely different person after sex she was so caring and attentive to you always making sure you were well taken care of.

Fetching a cool cloth she cleaned you up and wrapped you up in a blanket, “get some rest darling” moving to get off the bed you grab her wrist.

“Cuddles?” putting on your best doe-eyed look knowing she’ll never refuse you and cuddles. A big smile grew on your face as she pulled the blankets back to curl up beside you. “Always my love” wrapping her arms around you pulling you closer into her embrace.

The thunderstorm had started to fade away and the room was filled with the soft rumbling of distant thunder and soft breaths as you kissed her softly to sleep thinking to yourself how lucky you were to have this woman wrapped up in your arms.

…

It had been a month since your little getaway and the students had been back for a while, unfortunately a flu had been going around the school and no one could escape it. You had been one of those victims of the sickness that plagued you for 2 weeks now.

Here you were slumped over the toilet for the millionth time today, not even making it to the staff toilets you had to charge into the students to expel what little of breakfast you had left in your stomach.

The students inside were certainly startled and ran straight out as you heaved, resting your head over the cold stall wall you heard a familiar sound of heels travelling down the hall outside. “Love!?” Larissa called out for you, and you cursed the student that went running to the principle, you didn’t want to concern her and it had taken you a week just to convince her to let you return to work.

“I’m ok Larissa jus...” the stall door flew open the light shining in and Larissa gasped at the sight of you. Your hair was a mess and you were so pale it scared her, swooping you in her arms she stormed down the hall. “I knew I shouldn’t have let you go back to work”

Kicking the door open to your private quarters she gently lay you down on the sofa “we are going to the doctor” you begin to interject but she shushes you earning a scowl.

“you have had this flu for 2 weeks now and you just keep getting worse darling!” she was rushing around the flat grabbing her things together and your coat. “we cant go now Larissa I have classes!”

“I have already had Professor Yen fill in for you, they will cover for you until we get this sorted”

[yourlocaltrashcan657]

Can I request yandere bertholdt x kidnapped reader if your comfortable with it?

Fake Comrade

Yandere! Bertolt Hoover x Female Reader

Y/N awoke to darkness, a thick blindfold tightly wrapped around her eyes. Her wrists ached from the restraints biting into her skin, and the cold, hard surface beneath her sent shivers down her spine. She struggled to remember how she ended up here, panic slowly rising in her chest.

Footsteps echoed in the distance, slow and deliberate. She froze, heart pounding, as they drew nearer. The blindfold was yanked off, and she blinked rapidly, trying to adjust to the dim light. A tall, shadowy figure loomed above her, and as her vision cleared, she recognized him.

"Bertolt?" she whispered, disbelief coloring her tone. His usually gentle face was etched with an unsettling intensity, a fervent glow in his eyes that she'd never seen before.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," he murmured, crouching down to her level. "I didn't want to do this, but you left me no choice."

She stared at him, trying to reconcile this version of Bertolt with the quiet, kind boy she had known. "Why? Why are you doing this?"

He sighed, running a hand through his dark hair. "You don't understand how much I care about you. Every time I saw you with someone else, every time you smiled at them instead of me, it tore me apart. I couldn't stand it anymore."

Tears welled up in her eyes as she struggled against the ropes. "Bertolt, this isn't right. You can't just... take me like this."

His expression softened, and for a moment, she caught a glimpse of the Bertolt she once knew. He reached out, gently brushing a tear from her cheek. "I know it's hard to understand now, but I'm doing this for us. For our future."

"You can't force someone to love you," she whispered, voice trembling. "This isn't love, Bertolt. This is obsession."

He flinched at her words, but the determined look in his eyes didn't waver. "Maybe it is. But I don't care. As long as you're with me, I can protect you. I can make you see how much you mean to me."

The door creaked open, and Bertolt stood, casting one last, lingering glance at her. "Just give it time, Y/N. You'll see. You'll understand."

As he walked away, she felt a sinking dread settle in her stomach. She was trapped, alone with a boy whose love had twisted into something dangerous and suffocating. And as the door closed behind him, she was left with nothing but the chilling echo of his footsteps and the oppressive weight of his obsession.

Hours passed in the dim room, the silence broken only by Y/N's ragged breathing and the occasional creak of the building settling. She tugged at the ropes again, but they held firm, chafing her wrists and sending spikes of pain shooting up her arms. Desperation clawed at her insides as she tried to devise a plan. There had to be a way out.

The sound of a key turning in the lock jolted her from her thoughts. The door opened, and Bertolt stepped in, carrying a tray. He set it down on a small table and approached her, his expression softening when he saw the fear in her eyes.

"I brought you some food," he said quietly. "You must be hungry."

Y/N glared at him, defiance warring with her hunger. "I don't want anything from you," she spat.

Bertolt's shoulders sagged, but he didn't retaliate. Instead, he simply sat down beside her, his large frame making the room feel even smaller. "I know you're angry," he murmured. "I understand. But I'm doing this for us, Y/N. You have to believe that."

She turned her head away, tears of frustration blurring her vision. "You can't keep me here forever," she said, her voice breaking. "Someone will come looking for me."

He sighed, a pained look crossing his face. "I know. But by the time they find us, you'll understand. You'll see that we belong together."

Days turned into weeks, and despite her initial resistance, Y/N found herself growing weaker. Bertolt was always there, a constant presence, watching over her with a mix of tenderness and possessiveness that made her skin crawl. He took care of her needs, bringing her food and water, but he never loosened her restraints.

One evening, as the sun set and bathed the room in a soft, golden light, Bertolt sat down beside her again. He looked different this time, more vulnerable, as if the weight of his actions was finally starting to wear on him.

"Do you remember the first time we met?" he asked quietly.

Y/N didn't respond, but her silence encouraged him to continue.

"It was at the training camp. You were struggling with your gear, and I offered to help you. You smiled at me, and in that moment, I knew I wanted to protect you. To keep you safe from everything."

She closed her eyes, the memory bittersweet. "I remember," she whispered. "But this isn't protection, Bertolt. This is imprisonment."

He reached out, gently taking her hand in his. "I know it seems that way now. But one day, you'll see that everything I've done was for you. For us."

As the days continued to pass, Y/N's hope began to wane. The reality of her situation settled over her like a suffocating blanket, and she realized that escape might be impossible. Bertolt's love had twisted into something dark and unrecognizable, and she was trapped in his web, with no way out.

One night, as she lay awake in the darkness, she heard Bertolt's soft, steady breathing beside her. For the first time, she allowed herself to really look at him. The boy she had once considered a friend was now a stranger, his face marked by the weight of his obsession.

In that moment, she made a silent vow. If there was any chance of escape, she would take it. She would find a way to break free from Bertolt's twisted love, no matter the cost.

But for now, she had to bide her time, waiting for the right moment. Because no matter how deep Bertolt's obsession ran, Y/N knew that her will to survive was stronger. And she would not let him control her fate

[smokerswifey]

Games : 4koa/ 7ds

Characters : Arthur, Fake Merlin/Giant Oc

Merlin..." Arthur rasped with tired eyes and a worn out smile on his lips .

He fell into the mage's arms, wrapping his arms around her tightly, hiding his face in the crook of her neck like a child .

Her arms stayed frozen against her sides for a moment before she raised them, her delicate hands resting against his muscled back.

" The knight of Death...Ironside's son- or- whatever the hell he is- is dead ."

" And if he's dead that means that the Four knights of the apocalypse are no more, which means that I won't die, which means that we can continue eradicating the rest of the non human races in peace !" Arthur as his voice pitched hysterically and his grip around Merlin tightened painfully.

He pulled his head away from Merlin's neck to look at her face to face, his bright purple eyes shining .

" Aren't you happy Merlin ?" He asked, his voice soft and small

Merlin looked down at Arthur blankly, trying to summon in vain an ounce of affection for the man nestled in her arms .

Yet nothing surfaced .

Not a smidge of love or fondness or tenderness .

Nothing .

Nothing except bone chilling fear.

Despite how soft this man acted with her, the sheer amount of bloodlust and cruelty she felt from him made Merlin terrified to go against his will .

That's why she said these following words .

" Of course I'm happy your maje- Arthur ." Merlin said giving the king a smile .

A small smile .

Soft .

Not to wide .

No teeth .

The smile she always made .

The smile Arthur had forced her to perfect .

The smile that was her's.

The smile that he had carved into her brain .

Merlin's smile .

Merlin's smile.

Arthur frowned at her for a moment before falling into her arms again.

" Merlin ? "

" Yes your- Arthur ?"

" Aren't I a good king Merlin ?" He simpered .

Fuck no .

" Yes you are Arthur ."

" All the non human races deserve to die, don't they ?"

No they don't!

" Yes they do Arthur ."

" And Meliodas and the rest of his pathetic group do deserve to die, right ? "

THE ONLY ONE WHO SHOULD DIE IS YOU!

" Yes they do Arthur ." She repeated her voice soft yet devoid of any warmth, only coldness .

The king stiffened in her arms, pulling out of the cook of her neck again to look firmly into her blank golden eyes .

" I'm a good person aren't I Merlin ?"

YOU ARE THE SCUM OF THE EARTH

" Yes you are Arthur. "

Arthur blinked his purple eyes slowly, before resting his forhead's against Merlin's, looking at her intensley with a soft smile.

" Do you love me Merlin ?"

I HATE YOU, YOU MONSTROSITY OF EVIL-

" Yes I do ."

Merlin spat out, violently.

As soon as the words left her mouth Merlin knew she fucked up.

Her voice was too cold, her smile was too forced and even her embrace was too rigid.

She broke character .

And if she broke character the game was over.

And if the game was over-

Arthur's bright eyes turned dark as soft smile on his lips slipped off .

He pulled out of Merlin's arms abruptly, slapping her hands away as she tried to pull him back in.

" No-no-no-no... I'm sorry-I'm sorry-" She squeaked trying to appease Arthur but it was too late.

Arthur sighed, irritated, ruffling his hand through his messy locks, shooting her a terrifying glare.

" You really had to mess up the smile huh ? I thought we had done enough lessons on it ." He said, walking towards her slowly as she backed away like a scared animal .

" I-im sorry-"

" But I guess you Giants have a harder time understanding basic sentences ." He continued, ignoring her, pulling his sword out of its sheathe.

" I'm really sorry-"

"You know I really liked that fairy better, she played the game really well until the end and if it wasn't for that little brat Guinevere you wouldn't be here in her stead..."

" PLEASE- Merlin tried falling to her knees, shielding her face her hands.

"...But sadly you'll have to pay for her foolishness-" Arthur said ignoring her cries, raising his sword-

" PLEASE ARTHUR DON'T, IT'S ME, IT'S MERLIN !" Merlin she tried, she begged, trying to convince hin to spare her life.

It was the wrong move

Arthur's purple eyes hardened, as he glared at the woman writing on the floor in front of him .

"No, no you're not ." He whispered quietly before driving his sword into Merlin's neck

The women let out a gurgle before falling back, falling onto the cool tiles with a heavy thud .

Purple smoke oozed out of her corpse replacing Merlin's dead body with the one of a female giant's .

Doris of the Giant Clan laid patheitcally in a pool of her own blood with tears running down her cheeks as she felt the last remnants of strength drain her body .

The last thing that she would ever see would be Arthur's guards bringing him yet another non human creature to transform into Merlin and pupeteer in his sick, sick, game .

She let put a strangled sob before her heavy eyelids shut and she drifted into unconsciousness.

The last thing that she would ever hear were these four.fucking.cursed.words-

" Don't you agree...Merlin?"

- Magnificent.M

Idk what the fuck I wrote and the ending was lazy as shit, but I just wanted to write about Arthur's victims and how he acts around them and vice versa 🫠🫠

[girlsdads]

Hello! If you like to read, who's your favorite author of all time? What's your favourite book? If you don't like to read, can you recommend me a movie or a music album? :)

Hi anon! I’m really flattered that you thought to ask me for book recs 🥹 Hope you or someone finds this helpful!! 🫶

One of my favorite books of all time is actually a YA novel- A Certain Slant of Light by Laura Whitcomb. Love story with a ghostly twist. Changed my LIFE as a teen. Still holds up as an adult.

My fave from more recent years is The Four Winds by Kristin Hannah. Period drama, Great Depression era, Dust Bowl. Strong female characters. Made me SOB.

My favorite series right now is definitely A Court Of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas. These books are definitely hate them or love them. EYE personally love the world-building and storyline and hotsexy characters but what do I know 🙄 Would encourage haters to give em a chance.

Psychological Thrillers/Crime/Etc.

Behind Her Eyes by Sarah Pinborough. FUCKED ME UP. BLEW MY MIND.

Survive the Night and Lock Every Door, both by Riley Sager. Easy reads, lots of suspense.

And Then She Was Gone by Lisa Jewell. Storytelling at its finest!!!! Anything by Lisa Jewell is perfect.

The Crow Girl by Erik Axl Sund. Deeply chilling and so good. (cw sexual abuse of a minor)

Period Romance

Anything by Cat Sebastian. Most of her books are m/m but she’s got some variety. Tender bodice rippers. (Faves: The Soldier’s Scoundrel 😏, We Could Be So Good)

A Marvellous Light by Freya Marske. m/m. Fantastic Beasts vibes. Heart-achingly good.

Captive Prince trilogy by C S Pacat. The GOAT. m/m. (cw sexual abuse of minors, very dubious consent situations, sexual slavery)

The Perks of Loving a Wallflower by Erica Ridley. f/f. We love gay girlbosses in victorian era England.

Contemp. Romance

The Charm Offensive by Alison Cochrun. m/m. The Bachelor but give it a gay happy ending.

The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang. m/f. “Practice sex.” Sizzling 🥵

Boyfriend Material by Alexis Hall. m/m. Fake relationship, grumpy/sunshine, all the tropes.

The Ex Talk by Rachel Lynn Solomon. m/f. Lots of banter, only one bed 😳

[zero-ek]

Route If - A day in life of a DiVA

New AZKi album let's gooo!

It's been just under four years since her latest full length album (not counting Futurity Step), which strangely feels like forever ago and just the other day at the same time. And my gosh the amount of things that have happened since: the end of INNK's music and AZKi's transfer to Hololive, reuniting with Suisei, her boom with Geoguesser and signing to a label, just to mention a few.

Looking at this blog i apparently never really discuss the pieces of music of the artists i like (despite my motto being my love of girls that sing), but while we absolutely haven't been short of AZKi releases since Re:Creating World, i feel like an album release is such a special occasion that i should at least attempt to talk about what i got out of it, to celebrate the achievement, if anything.

Probably my single favorite thing about this album is that it's AZKi's first concept album! Kinda, sorta... you see, i'm not 100% sure that it was intentional, but as the title of this post implies, the tracks are arranged in such a way to evoke the image of a daily routine, and the thoughts and emotions that each period of the day represent. I'll get into it as we go along but the reason i'm not super sure about this being like a strong concept in the album is that while the arrangement and the feel of each track does give off that vibe, their lyrical content is a lot more varied than a proper concept album would be, so while i'm kinda sure it is what she was going for, i'm not completely betting on it.

Lazy - waking up

No AZKi it's a workday you can't go back to sleep

First of all, i absolutely love this for an album starter, the way it begins with just her voice and the little synth hits not only sells the vibe of "your brain booting up in the morning", but it also serves as a sweet introduction to AZKi's "Temperature of the Voice" motif that this album and the subsequent Live have been leaning on, we start with just her voice (kinda), and that alone sets the mood for the remaining of the track.

Love this one verse in particular:

"As winter alone makes the temperature of my voice visible I wonder if it disappears in the spring, summer or autumn? Surely it's stil here, tangible, and dancing As if saying 'I'm here, i'm right here' From directly within my heart."

I seriously cannot recommend enough that you add this track to your morning routine, especially if it involves going outside for like getting breakfast or just taking a walk, the soft instrumentals make for a perfect match to the tender sunlight of the early morning, while AZKi's voice both puts you at ease with its texture and gets you ready for the day with the honestly very catchy rap-esque flow, and finally, the lyrics, which describe a variety of scenes taking place in the winter morning, painting a picture of a very lively world, even with all the coldness in the air.

Probably what i love the most about this one is that while it's very much in AZKi ReD territory, it's not a format that she's ever done before (the closest i can think is 'Time Capsule'), i'm not one to compare songs, but this seriously reminds me of 'fake news' by Nagase Yuka, with how it describes the world around you in this catchy, but laid back and not overly melodic rap-ish singing, over this very chill beat. Put it short, it's not a song that gets you paying attention to it as much as it gets you to look at everything around you.

+1 vote for more AZKi and Akki in the future

Entropy - opening credits

Look i know we're going off "theme" already but this is seriously the best way i can explain how it feels when this song comes up right after Lazy, like, literally the first thing that came to my mind was the opening scene of Madoka Magica Rebellion, where like you get this whole montage of Madoka getting ready to go to school and then "Colorful" begins playing once she sets off.

Though, to be fair, this song very much still aludes to a morning setting, specifically, going out in the morning to face the day, which is why i had that thought in the first place:

"I tightly hold this clear blue sky As today is yet another sunny day"

Surprisingly, my favorite thing about this song is not even that it was made by Wataru Sena (though i do 100% love that, my gosh have you heard that snare?), but that under the cheery singing and uplifiting instrumentals, this song is actually pretty melancholic (......just like "Real Melancholy", which is also by Wataru Sena... huh). The song is about this "feeling" that she can't put a name to, but it's the idea of being someone's light, and to keep looking up to the big blue sky even though she herself is burdened by her own sorrow and pain to carry.

"If i can shine light upon someone If i can lead someone to salvation I feel like even i could make a single miracle happen" "My singing melts away and becomes itself the morning Embracing sadness itself, i turn somewhat feverish And the sky remains warm and beautiful"

This feeling that she says she can't explain, i strongly believe that it should be called 'Life'.

So for a crash course, entropy is basically the idea of thermal equilibrium from the laws of thermodynamics taken up a notch, that is, in a closed system, there's only a limited amount of energy that can be used, and everything that happens inside this system uses up that energy, turning it from usable to unusable. The more unusable energy there is, the more the entropy increases, until it reaches its highest point, that is, there's no more usable energy left in the system, which means it reached its state of equilibrium.

In a macroscopical level, it sort of goes into the idea that once something in the everything in the universe has been formed, it can only decay, a plant withers, mountains erode, stars burn up, galaxies run out of gas, etc, etc.

Life, though, always seeks to make more of itself, to keep its lineage going, even if yeah, it is futile in the grand scheme of things. Life is one of the, if not the only thing in this universe that doesn't just stay in place, waiting for its existence to burn out, but is always seeking to persist one way or another, "it'll find a way", and the song goes on to say exactly that:

"If a flower is only to wither once it blooms Then by planting its seeds it shall live on Doesn't that mean 'fate' never meant anything to begin with? So bloom with pride, and smile as you're scattered away."

Just as there is meaning to life persisting in the face of the cold and uncaring universe, there is meaning to keeping your head up and being kind in the face of the struggles of the world, because it is exactly our sorrows that drive us to keep on going and do better.

My Strategy! - the challenges of the day

information war!

Something i find really clever about this song is how it's about this philosophy of self discipline and being proactive about your tasks, but not in a particularly positive way, but rather how it's a very "unhuman" way to go about things. And with that in mind, the instrumentals and main melody line being very Wafuu makes you wonder what exactly she could be refering to... hmmm."

I really like the little bridge with the beat change, not only because it sounds kinda cool, but also because i think it has the best verse of the song:

"The aim of self reflection is to keep the laziness of daily life in check Such a drastic kaizen doesn't allow aimlessness or personal involvement. This system of perfection goes... against levelheaded thinking. 'Hey, hey', the unexpected goes, 'hey, hey', clogging up the mind"

("Kaizen" is a japanese philosophy of continuous self improvement, it's often left untranslated)

This song is very much about the self perpetuating duality of trying to conform to uptight standards, and how it makes intrusive thoughts all the more alluring, which characterizes the "information war" she mentions. Though while i have some ideas, i'm not really sure what exactly she refers to when she says "can i go even further with you?" in the chorus.

Also i wanna highlight this line in the first pre-chorus:

"Once i get dizzy from being too restless, i'll just sing me a song."

Hmmm....

Operation Z - the crushing routine

Ok i can't be the only one who listened to this one and immediately went "this is a Tokino Sora song", like, this is straight out of Futurity Step and it seriously surprised me that it wasn't one of the returning composers from that album.

I'm a bit conflicted about this song, because on one hand the lyrics are really interesting if you know AZKi, and also very relevant if you're in that same spot. But at the same time, the song itself doesn't do it for me, i don't know if it's because it comes right after another "cutesy" song with a similar theme, but this really isn't a song i see myself going out of my way to listen. Maybe it'll grow on me in time but i don't know i just don't feel it right now.

Which sucks because like i said, the lyrics are actually pretty interesting to get into with this one, like, some seriously stinging verses hidden under the cutesy upbeat vibe, for example, the first pre chorus:

"I'm taken by euphoria, and it doubles back on me With this rate of consumption, the faster my life goes The quicker its end comes for me. I can't breathe, and my voice won't come out anymore."

Or the first bridge:

"To those who can't find it in you to persevere any longer 'Just leave it to someone', 'it's alright to quit' Take up a bargain on this big sale of words of comfort. Saying 'take it easy' is the default Believing that 'will conquers' marks the post mortem phase Working hard is just worthless pay? I'm half body, half spirit."

To me, this one is a "corporate drone" anthem, highlighting just how much this high-movement, high-stress life absolutely sucks, not being able to fully appreciate the small moments of bliss because everything is just going by so fast. There is some hope in the last leg of the song, but it actually surprised me just how pessimistic this one is.

I'm not sure what to make of the title, but my best guess is that it would be a name for this system that creates zombies out of people, seeing how they're alive, but not living. It's actually frightening that this is actually a real thing that happens.

I don't think it'll ever happen but i would love to hear a remix of this, i really feel like this one has banger potetial given a new arrangement.

Chaotic inner world - rejecting conformity

Died 2021 - Born 2024. Welcome back, AZKi BLaCK

And this is what i mean when i say Operation Z has banger potential, because the lyrics in this one follow right after the themes of the previous two tracks, and just absolutely knocks it out of the park with it, like goddang this song feels good to hear.

It sort of reminds me of "Rotated • Repeated" with how you're taken along by the piano to this very unusual and uneven intro, with the sudden stops throwing you off balance, and right when you feel like you get the hang of it, it cuts off to go into the verse.

And also, i love how encompassing the drums are on this one, they have that drier character that you usually find in metal songs, so the kick really punches right though directly on your face, while the cymbals overload your ears with how their sizzle sort of blends into the underlying synth line. The instrumentals complement the lyrics perfectly with this one and i love it.

Speaking of lyrics, for how intense this song is, the lyrics are actually pretty positive, but what's cool about them is that both the lines themselves and AZKi's BLaCK voice have this kind of smug feel to them, so it sort of gives off a vibe of "you know all the stuff that the previous two songs were about? Yeah i say f*** that."

This one line is particularly interesting to me:

"What meaning is there to get drunk on temperature? Beyond purity lies a dark, dark oath."

I'm not super sure on this, but i feel like this references the previous two songs directly, and i guess the whole motif of focusing on her voice. Like, the previous two songs were pretty happy sounding, but turned out to be pretty serious, something you don't get to if all you're listening to is her voice as a musical instrument, which goes on to apply to AZKi's music, or even just music as a whole.

"Will i reach you if it's through my voice? Will my voice reach farther and farther? Can you believe me? Will you believe me? I want you to believe. All this time i've been singing my truth, that i know for sure that you'll accept."

I also really love how the chorus goes right against that bridge in Operation Z about shallow niceties:

"Inner world, it's branches may be infinte, but i still want to come across you at the end of times. Though expectations are high, there it'll be made even. So what do you say of a dream that offers a sharp gratitude? Inner world, again and again, the lies will lose, and real feelings will win. So i see right through those pretty falsehoods, and indulge myself in this chaotic dream."

Going by what was said in My Strategy!, i'm assuming that the "chaotic dream" refers to the true intentions and desires that she has deep within that she's supposed to ignore in order to conform to the system of perfection, the chaotic and colorful self that's at odds with the grey and uniform world she rejects.

Dunno where this fits in the day though, i 100% lost the plot already...

Akenai Yoru ga Atta Nara - nightfall

This has to be up there as the most AZKi of AZKi songs, like i can't explain it well but i feel like this one is the most upfront she has been with the "i have a lot to deal with but i'll sing as long as i can make someone happy" theme that so many of her songs have.

Peep the duality between the first verse and the chorus:

"Ahh, this night doesn't seem to belong to me With only the stars twinkling up high to illuminate. I could never become as beautiful as them But tonight still, i sing to keep myself going" If the night were to be neverending I'd want to simply melt away and disappear If there was a night that was neverending Then i wouldn't have to become a shining star I wouldn't need to become a shining star."

Very interestingly, not only does the crux of this song goes back to "End Roll wa Owaranai" and "canopus", but even instrumentally they're very similar, like seriously, try putting the three of them next to each other in a playlist, it's actually crazy how well they flow together.

Also in the same vein as the aforementioned songs, i need to praise the rhythm section on this one, the drums are super crisp with beautiful sounding hits, and i love the slap bass during the little instrumental break at the middle.

There's this stinging slice of realism with this song, where she seems to accept that she can't be perfect, she can't be the brightest star in the sky, and that life will just go on like that.

"I've always had trouble with words, and the only thing i've gotten better at is sighing."

But the one thing that she holds on to amidst all that is singing, despite her realizations, she also knows that singing is a part of her, that she pretty much needs it to live, as she said so herself once and says again in the very last line of the song. Though she wants her voice to reach other people, and she wants to shine even if not as the brightest, the one person who needs to be satisfied the most by her music is herself.

"Every time i'm hurt, i'm made aware that i'm of a different kind But still i will sing with all my heart."

I really love the bridge of this song, where she describes something that is "hopeful, ephemeral, optimistic, but surely beautiful", which following songs like "Inochi", she is 100% talking about herself here and i for one couldn't agree more.

Shine bright, Canopus.

Étranger - evening

This one is my favorite, like it gave me goosebumps the first time i heard it, AZKi's voice just goes so perfectly with strings, and the song itself has this very pretty atmosphere that really got to me, the way it feels so gallant and magical reminds me of "petal dance" from the previous album, i certainly wouldn't mind hearing more of this in the future.

The lyrics on this one are possibly the most interesting, since while i do think there's a mainline interpretation, they feel vague enough that they can be taken multiple ways, which gives the song different flavors depending of which way you look. The crux of is the idea of longing for someone you can't meet, but it's not super clear how you relate to this person, so it can be someone who died, someone you know who is far away, or even someone you don't know who you look up to.

The first pre-chorus in particular caught my eye:

"With no words, and no way to get hurt You're as an étranger, my beloved."

For one it seems to call back to the previous song, where there's both mentions of not having a way with words, and having realizations upon getting hurt. But it also reminds me of "afterglow" and how in that song you can take the "your memories of me fade away" theme as both someone being so out of your life that they feel like a stranger, and also as someone who has reached their second death, as they say, from being forgotten after their passing.

The second pre-chorus, too:

"Before i knew it, the stars spread out throughout the sky. It's a panorama that waits for you, and only you. Fluttering beyond the clouds The image of it is so comforting."

I can see this as someone who's risen to the stars in both senses of the phrase, and i can't settle for a single interpretation.

In and of itself, it's interesting that the song keeps unclear what the relationship between the two concerned people is, which the first line of the chorus captures well.

"Even though you're here next to me, your being couldn't be further away"

It's impossible to truly know someone, be that someone you're closely related to, or just someone who feels close by some means or another (like an idol, for example). Conversely, we carry the people close to us that died near to our hearts, even though they're not here anymore. Each and any of these points of view are completely valid, and it's really cool to me how the song manages to encompass all of them.

Gogo 8ji no Chorus Song - night

This song will not leave my head and i love that.

This is the reddest AZKi ReD has been since "Intersection", like this is undoubtedly the most "basking in the night city lights" out of all the "basking in the night city lights" songs she has (which dang there's actually quite a handful of those).

While i do love the synth instrumentation in the rest of the song, i wish the song had more of what we got in the very beginning, like, her singing with the pitched down harmony to give the impression of a chorus, together with the hand claps and drums have this really, i don't know how to put it, "raw music" (?) vibe that really gets you listening, and when the little piano accents come, it's just straight up magical and i need to hear more of it.

Thematically, this song i think seems to be the continuation of "Akenai Yoru..." and the idea of the value that there is to sing, i mean the driving point of this one is "it doesn't even have to mean anything, just the act of singing itself is worth something", which is where the main scat line comes from. I particularly like how Akenai Yoru had the line of "I've always had trouble with words, and the only thing i've gotten better at is sighing.", while the first pre chorus and chorus of this one go:

"While there's a lot i want to talk to you about But rather than words, i'll use these overflowing feelings of mine..." "So resound, my symphony Through this melody we both felt I don't need words or even common sense, see? As long as i can sing with you."

Then the second verse has this very heartwarming callback to Entropy:

"C'mon, look around at what permeates this night Each and every single one of those glimmers Has the kind thought of 'let's be someone's light' Which binds them together."

The glimmers here obviously refers to the night lights, but i also interpret them as the stars themselves, and how in the previous two songs they could be seen as people like AZKi herself, who shine through the night for the sake of others. If we think of either the lit nightscape of the city, or the light of the stars themselves, it gives off the idea that the glimmers, united in their desire to illuminate, are never really alone, and i think that's very sweet.

Now if you'll excuse me, i'll be singing "la-li-lat-tas-sta-li-la, fal-li-lat-tas-stel-lo-li-hee" for the remainder of the year

Yoru no Rinkaku - bedtime

This song hurts.

The one way i can most effectively describe how this one feels is being completely out of energy, and completely alone, with only your thoughts to torment you. This song to me is about being exhausted, not just physically, but of everything, of living, of pushing forwards, of trying to be better. It's like the crash from all the tracks so far, where she's left to deal with the toll of all the things she's done and went through, and it's painfully overwhelming. I think the second verse conveys this the best:

"This unneeded heart grew so heavy that it can't be moved. Yet it comes to meet me as deep into the night. I again pretend not to see the yesterday i couldn't shake off, as it presses against me. I'm sorry i'm like this."

Despite being in pain in the way she is, it doesn't stop her from showing her "small and useless" kindness, but she then says that "she spews lies pretending to be an adult" so that she doesn't forget that, and that hurts her as well. In the second pre chorus, she says:

"I haven't given up, and that's why it hurts I haven't given up, and that's why i hate it"

The main thing i got from this song is a feeling of helplessness out of feeling left alone in the dark, it doesn't seem to me like she knows here how to break free from this pain, or what she's supposed to do to overcome it, so she just laughs it away until, like the first line of the chorus says, she gets tired of it. And i think this is further displayed by the way she sings here, i mean AZKi is notorious for how she can convey emotion through her singing. But with this song, she sings very flat and reserved, like, there's no power behind her voice like there was in Akenai Yoru or Étranger, which gives this air of resignation to the song that really gets to me, in a "what can i even do?" sort of way.

One thing i find interesting is that the song evokes this feeling of isolation, with lines like "it's so nice not seeing anything up in the sky" or "I break/hide myself without anyone knowing", but at the same time, the song still seems to be directed at someone, with the first pre chorus saying that "it's so easy for you to not keep your promises no matter how hard you try", or the second pre chorus, "My front bangs that i grew out because you praised them, did i come to like them?". This being a song about the self, i wonder if she's talking in third person or if you could read these as actually being directed at someone, it's been bugging me and i'm not really sure.

I've been having a hard time putting thoughts to words for this one because to me this is really a song that you have to sit with and wholly pay attention to, like, it's meant to be felt just as much as it's meant to be listened to, and i've been noticing that i actually have a pretty tough time describing how things feel for me. So this is only like 50% of what i got out of the song, and even then i think this one in particular has a lot more to get into the more you listen to it.

map in the cup - the next day

I already loved this song when i heard it on her birthday live, but man, listening to it after all the other tracks, and the last one in particular, makes it even more meaningful and heartwarming than it already was.

I love how this one sort of comes full circle back to Lazy, in how it describes these rather mundane events in such a way that they feel special and filled with love and life. Also i don't know if it's just me, but when i first heard the title "map in the cup", it reminded me of tasseography (yeah i had to google this one), like just the idea that the random patterns forming on a tea cup can hold so much meaning over someone's life and future, i don't think that's where the song was going but it's been on my mind all this time.

The song's spirit of finding joy in the small things hits extra hard after how the last one feels like being crushed by the weight of the world, a particular detail of this one is that with each verse being set at a different time of day, it conveys the idea of taking things one step at a time, and unlike "Operation Z", where she was so busy, physically and mentally, that she barely even had time to eat, this one serves to show how it makes for a much more fulfilling day when you can take things slow, not to laze around, but to do the things you want to do, at the pace you're most comfortable with, which you see with how the main chorus ends each time with a drive to do something after being soothed by each drink:

"[...] I slowly drink it all up, and i'm off to face this day." "If i turn the pages of nature, will a new season greet me each time? I'm off to find that out with you." "[...] In comfort, my dreams greet me, and i'm off to face tomorrow"

Also, i love this part from the last chorus, which is set during nighttime

"It warms my heart, and as i look up at the starry sky I feel like i can fly anywere In my own secret trip through the universe's endless possibilities."

Coming right after how the last song's first line was about an empty sky and what that entails, it's safe to say i much more prefer this one.

Personal suggestion, but try putting this one right after "Weekend Milk" by HACHI on your playlist, i assure you listening to it after work on a friday night heals your very soul

Inochi (2024 ver.) - end credits

In hindsight, it's actually genius that this song was the lead single for the album, not only because it's Inochi and that alone has its weight, but listening to it after all the other tracks puts so much of this song, and this version in particular, in a new perspective.

I say that this one is the end credits because not only i think map in the cup already wraps up all the themes of the album, but because with credit songs they're usually those themes in a more lyrical packaging, in order to really drive the point home, and i think this song, in the context of the album, serves that very purpose, like i don't feel like it continues the themes so much as it just talks about them, hence end credits.

The line "a life according to your mood" hits particularly hard here, since what i would say is the common throughline between all the songs so far is different aspects of life and how you choose or is made to position yourself in relation to that. This is a song that is directed not to a "you" within the lyrics, but directly to the listener, and in this context, i feel like this song is just as much about your life than it is of hers, like, it's AZKi encouraging you to think about how the song and this album applies to yourself and your experiences.

And so we get another perspective on the change from this to the original version, thinking back to Entropy and the idea of persisting, of being someone's light even when things are rough, While this version still doesn't deny that things end and that's just how it is, it doesn't do so with the tone of melancholy that the original does, "just the fact that you're smiling right now makes it worth it", as this version goes on to say.

You may not be the brightest star in the sky, you may not be free of the hardships and pain that all of us are saddled with, and you may still be part of this society that makes zombies out of people, but if through your efforts for your kindness to persevere through it all, you were able to shine some light on someone else's situation, then even if all that's left for you is to wither away, your blossoming was not at all meaningless.

That is the feeling of life.

... So uh, yeah, those are some of my thoughts on Route If, not all of them because otherwise i would be yapping here forever, but the ones i could most coherently put into writing. I'm finishing this up around a month after the album came out and i'm still over the moon with having this and the live concert within a week of each other so my mind is a big mess of AZKi related thoughts right now.

Speaking of the concert, i decided to make another one of those big compilation posts for the concerts on this second half of the year, so there will be a big post for that one too, it's just not gonna be out for a while.

Apart from tracks 3 and 4 not being my cup of tea instrumentally, i'm very satisfied with the album coming after Re:Creating World, though yeah, i would've loved to hear more AZKi BLaCK, i feel like she's really in her element in regards to her singing on this one, like she really honed down what makes her voice so compelling and is really capitalizing on it, and it has me very excited to see what directions she might be taking in the future.

AZKichi Big Love ��

[thisgirlnamedblusy]

Holi, espero que estés bien. Si quieres, claro ¿Podrías hacer que Marylin (laurel) y reader tuvieran una relación pero se termina porque te enteras de su plan de acabar con los excluidos, después de unos días ella te vea salir con alguien más y aún no acepte su rompimiento?

Hola!!! Eres la primera persona que me escribe en mi idioma natal, y eso mola mucho!!! Yo en Tumblr escribo en inglés para que todo el mundo pueda leerlo, pero si prefieres leerlo en español, puedes hacerlo AQUÍ. Muchas gracias por tu petición!! Espero que te guste!!! Cuídate mucho!!! :)

Translated request:

Hello, I hope you are well. If you want, of course, could you make Marylin (laurel) and reader have a relationship but it ends because you find out about her plan to finish the outcasts, after a few days she sees you dating someone else and she doesn't accept your breakup?

You can't hate me

Pairing: Marilyn Thornhill/ Laurel Gates x Fem, Teacher! Reader

Warnings: Angst love

Word count: 2,890

Summary: You know her, and she is not a murderer, she is your girlfriend, you have to be wrong, or so it’s that you like to think…

N/A: Requests are open!! Sorry if there is some delay answering them, work is an awful shit :( But I’m working every day on your requests to write them asap!!! Sorry about the language mistakes. I love you all!!!

“A house?” You asked amused, not believing your girlfriend's words at all.

Everything in Nevermore was beginning to be disturbing. A monster in the woods, a student in a coma, cover-ups...

At least you had her, you had Marilyn. She was the most innocent of your companions, a tender, sweet and affectionate woman. It didn't take much for you to love her, because she earned it every day. You were convinced that she was probably the woman you had been looking for for so long. You even declined an invitation to have dinner with a girl from the village who was apparently quite well known for her beauty.

You and Marilyn were walking around the academy when she unexpectedly told you that she had bought a house in that town.

“Yes, it was a real bargain. Although it is abandoned... Do you know the path that leads to the academy from Pilgrim World?” The redhead told you, with hope on her face. She told you that one day you would leave Nevermore and start a real life together, but you didn't think it would be so soon. The commitment was a little scary to you.

“Yes, I know… But there's only the old Gates mansion and… Wait.” You stopped walking, surprised by what you thought that meant. “Have you bought the Gates mansion?”

“Exactly,” she answered, sighing. “It had been abandoned for years, and it was reduced.”

“Uhh, just thinking about it gives me chills. Surely you don't know what happened to that family, right?” You said, creating a terrifying atmosphere. She looked away and made a strange face for a second.

“Well, I've heard some rumors. They didn't have much luck,” she told you, with a somehow broken tone, “sorry, such tragic stories make me sad.”

“That's because you're human, Marilyn. But don't feel sorry for them, they deserved it,” you said, taking her hand affectionately. The redhead nodded and faked a smile.

“Do you think someone deserves to die just for doing what they think is the right thing?” She asked, causing you to widen your eyes. You didn't used to talk about such philosophical things.

“Uoh, uoh, put the brakes on Socrates. I think I'm not ready for that kind of moral debates,” you said joking. “But what I am sure of is that if the right thing to do was to annihilate a group of people for a certain reason, they must not have been very right in the head…”

Marilyn looked at you and her expression relaxed, nodding slightly.

“You're right, (Y/N)…” She said with an almost inaudible voice. “I was wondering if you'd like to come with me to take a look at the house. You see, I want to reform it so that I can call it “home” one day.”

“Well, even though it's scary, it's probably much better than the rooms here, surely when I get out of here I'll need a good chiropractor,” you said jokingly, placing a hand on your back.

“It's just that the bed is too small for both of us…” she said, following your joke.

“I don't think that's why it is, I also like to sleep on the edge.”

Marilyn gave an adorable laugh and squeezed your hand hard.

“Will you accompany me tonight? The truth is that the place makes my hair stand on end,”she told you with some fear in her voice.

“Okay, but if the monster comes I'll run until I get to New York,” you said sarcastically.

You weren't some superhuman creature like a vampire, or a werewolf, you just had visions from time to time. If you had to face that horrible monster, you would have nothing to do.

The mansion doors creaked in a chilling manner. You couldn't help but look around. Now the house belonged to the nicest woman you knew, but something about that place gave you a bad feeling, and you were pretty good with forebodings.

“It looks like the Amityville house,” you said, contemplating the huge house that rose in the dark. The redhead laughed. Strangely she was very calm, and you knew her well enough to know that Marilyn wasn't exactly brave, or that she liked those kinds of places. You thought that anyone who bought a house should feel the same, after all it was hers, and with a little work, surely she managed to eliminate that terrifying aura that surrounded it.

“Don't worry, (Y/N). No one has died here, or at least that's what the real estate agent told me,” she told you, reassuring you while she put the key in the lock.

“It's still scary…” You muttered, glancing at the overgrown garden that surrounded the house. Marilyn looked at you and kissed you tenderly, running a hand over your cheek.

“Don't be afraid, honey, you're with me…” She whispered to you. You nodded, not quite sure that was any real comfort.

When the door opened, you peeked out timidly. Inside it was even worse. Your hands began to sweat, a sign that something was wrong. You swallowed and followed the redhead into the house. That there was electricity was clearly a plus. It was still a dark house, but at least it wasn't so dark.

“It's quite big,” you commented, looking at every detail.

“Of course, it is,” Marilyn said. “Too big for just one person.” Saying that, she winked at you and kept walking, entering what looked like an office. You smiled. Of course she was meaning what you thought she was meaning.

“That will have to be discussed, right?” You asked amused. She shook her head.

“When it's reformed you'll see that there's nothing to talk about,” she joked. “I need you to wait here for a moment. I have to check something in the garage.”

“Are you going to leave me here alone?” You asked scared. She shrugged her shoulders.

“I have read that this type of environment is ideal for rats. If you want to come with me….”

Rats terrified you. They were your worst phobia. You were definitely better off in that old office.

“Okay, okay, okay, I'd rather stay,” you said with a disgusted face.

“I thought so. If it's clear I'll come for you. I'm sure you like the car left behind by the previous owners.”

You nodded, as Marilyn grabbed what looked like some kind of rodent poison and headed out the door.

You sighed, trying not to get nervous. The office was intact, save for the obvious passage of time. On the wall was a large portrait of a family, the Gates, no doubt.

“I hope you don't mind that I'm here… Bunch of fanatics,” you hissed, remembering the terrible plan that family had for people like you.

There was something in that painting that looked familiar to you, but you didn't know what. You moved a little closer to take a closer look, and reached out your hand to brush away the cobwebs. Suddenly a dizziness shook your body, and you had an all too familiar feeling. Your legs wobbled and you fell to the ground, ready to receive a vision that surely would not be pleasant.

“Kill them all… Be a man!”

“She's too young, Ansel, you shouldn't talk to her like that….”

“Laurel is old enough to know that outcasts are scum….”

“Mom… Why has Garrett gone to heaven? Was he not happy with us?”

“Enough, Ansel! I have already lost a son…I don't want to lose our daughter too!”

“Don't tell me what to do! You are a coward, incapable of realizing that our son was murdered by those monsters, and they have to pay for it….”

“Oh, fuck!” You yelled as you opened your eyes. You were there, lying on the ground, and you had just had a rather disturbing vision. It was the Gates family, no doubt. Those horrible memories were accompanied by images, images of the monster, of the terrifying family, of Joseph Crackstone…. The last of them was a bookcase, which seemed to be in that same house.

“Shit, I knew it wasn't a good idea to come here…” You said getting up from the ground with somewhat blurred vision. “My goodness…”

Your eyes cleared and you leaned against a nearby table, trying to forget that horrible sight. But the problems were only beginning. The dim light in the office began to flicker.

“Oh no, what now?” You asked, looking for Marilyn with your eyes. Soon it was pitch black. The light that saved you from dying of terror disappeared. You immediately took out your phone and turned on the flashlight.

“Marilyn?” You asked on the air. There was no answer.

Your phone vibrated, making you jump in the air.

“(Y/N)?”

“Oh, thank God…” You sighed with relief when you heard your girlfriend's voice. “I'm in the dark.”

“I know. The fuse blew. You have to turn it on again.”

“Okay…Tell me where it is," you said, pointing the light towards the door.

“Leave the office and right in front you will find the library, on the wall at the back is the fuse box.”

“Okay, okay, here I go.”

You hung up the phone and left the office, trying to calm yourself down.

“Okay, okay, in front, it must be here,” you said to yourself. You entered the room, checking that at the end of it, there was the fuse box. You reached over and opened it, carefully lifting the switch. The power came back on and your heart rate returned to normal. You quickly searched for the light in that room and when you turned it on, you leaned against the wall, closing your eyes.

“Come on, (Y/N), you're 25 years old, you can't be such a coward,” you chided yourself. You pulled away and looked around you. You soon realized that there was something there that you had already seen. The bookshelf from your vision was in front of you.

Your curiosity was your weakness, and you went to the furniture observing every detail. It couldn't be a coincidence. Your visions were never a coincidence. You didn't see anything unusual at first, but a closer look made you realize something important.

“Why isn't there dust here?” You asked, looking at an ornament on the wood. It was evident that someone had touched it, as its twin on the other side was covered in the same layer of dust than the rest of the house.

Your instinct made you take your hand to that ornament, and as soon as you put it on it, it sank and the books that were there moved, as if they were a secret door.

What was behind that mechanism made your hair stand on end. It was an altar, but not just any, it was one dedicated to Joseph Crackstone.

“Disturbing...” You said, reaching your hand towards one of the candles that had been placed there. “This candle…”

A vision invaded your mind, but not so intense as to make you faint.

“No, it can't be…” You sighed, upset.

What you saw was something impossible. Marilyn, your dear Marilyn was there, lighting the candles and looking with great devotion at the image of that pilgrim. It didn't take you long to remember all the strange phrases the redhead had once said and the circumstances themselves, for a terrifying revelation to appear in your mind.

“She is… She is Laurel Gates,” you whispered, scared. In some way that you couldn't explain, you knew, but you had nothing to make you really think about it. You thought that this time your intuition was wrong, until that moment.

Marilyn was your girlfriend, you loved her, you loved her very much. Worse was not who she claimed to be. She was part of the most hated family at Nevermore, of the bigots who tried to kill all people like you. You couldn't tell her anything, you didn't dare. What you were also sure of is that you couldn't continue with her, your principles prevented you from doing so. The Gates were murderers, hate killed them all, and Laurel was probably up to no good.

You had to run away from there, and save your next move for later, or never.

 Some days later…

“Okay, we'll see you there,” you said before hanging up the phone.

The following days were horrible. You decided on the strategy of ignorance. She was looking for you, she was calling you. But you didn't answer. Avoiding her was difficult, but she seemed to give up after a while. You never talked to her. You hadn't even officially broken up. Silence became your best ally, and your next step was to try to forget everything you felt for her.

That girl you turned down seemed receptive to meeting you. You didn't want to use anyone to forget, but starting to meet people was a good first step.

You made it to the cafeteria, still thinking about Laurel. She might be a Gates, but she was still the woman you were in love with. If you weren't distracted, you would end up going crazy, or falling into her intolerant arms.

“Hi, (Y/N), I'm glad you decided to go out with me,” that girl said. You just nodded, calling the waiter.

To your dismay, Laurel walked in there too and fixed her eyes on you, looking surprised and clearly angry. That made things very complicated. The redhead seemed to ignore you and she went to the counter.

“Hey, why did you change your mind? I thought you had a girlfriend.”

You turned, snapping out of your thoughts.

“Oh, well… Not anymore.”

You didn't talk much. When the tea arrived at your table you used it so you didn't have to say a word. You were in love with Laurel, and that couldn't change that fast.

“Are you alright?” The girl asked. You shook your head.

A little dizziness, followed by a terrible fatigue suddenly hit you. Your vision became blurry, and it didn't seem like any trance. You made a feint to get up from the table, but you fell to the ground with a crash. You couldn't make out the voices you heard before everything went black.

Your eyelids were heavy, but you began to feel conscious, taking in a familiar smell of dust and abandonment in your nose. You tried to move, but something in your wrists prevented you. You were tied up

You were able to open your eyes and you found yourself in what seemed to be a little boy's room, or a girl's in this case. The atmosphere was familiar. You were at the Gates mansion, and you weren't alone.

“Finally you wake up…” A familiar voice said.

Your vision cleared and your worst fears were confirmed. Marilyn, or Laurel, was sitting up in bed, looking at you with a disturbing expression.

“What are you doing? What have you done to me?” You asked, trying to get out of your bonds.

“Calm down, I just want to talk,” she said, her voice too relaxed.

“Well, I don't want to talk to you, Laurel. Yes, I know everything, I know who you are, and be thankful that I didn't want to find out what you're up to,” you said furiously.

“Honey... I'm the same woman as always...”

“No, that's not true. Since you were a little girl, you were raised to hate the marginalized… To hate us…”

“You are not like them, (Y/N). You are my girlfriend, and I love you,” she said, caressing your cheek. You moved violently.

“We're not girlfriends anymore, Laurel. I could never be with you. You are just like your family, just like Joseph Crackstone.”

“You and me know that this is not true.”

You shook your head, giving up. You couldn't let go of the bonds.

“Wait until I let go. Because I'm going to throw all the Jericho police on you,” you hissed, with tears in your eyes.

“You won't do anything. You love me. You would never do something like that,” she told you, running her hand through your hair.

“You're wrong.”

“You think so? Let's check it,” she said, taking a knife from the table. You stared at her in horror, until Laurel began to cut your bonds. You sighed as you felt free and rubbed your wrists. “Go ahead, (Y/N), go hand me over to the police. I promise I won't move from here.”

Her tone of voice was childish and wicked. You were determined to do it, but when you got out of bed, your feelings attacked you mercilessly. Happy memories of your relationship came to your mind, to make you feel weak and powerless. You couldn't hurt her. She was right.

“Come on, (Y/N). You are free,” she insisted.

Tears slipped down your cheeks as you turned to look at her. She got up and approached you with painful slowness. You grabbed her waist and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.

“You should be locked up…” you whispered, leaning your forehead against hers.

“But you don't want that...”

You didn't answer. You just leaned in to kiss her. It was an evil kiss that you knew was wrong. She was your enemy, but you couldn't help but love her, and want to live together in that house, whatever the consequences were.

[themistymountainscold]

Frenchie: I think Izzy's cheating on me

John: The lying bastard!

John: How do you know?

Frenchie: I don't have any hard proof

John: Oh, then I'm sure he's not cheating on you! John: And if he is, I'll kill him!

John: But if he's not, you guys are great together!

_______

Frenchie: Izzy! This soup is flaccid!  Izzy: LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK DOES THIS MEAN?!

____

Frenchie: I have a problem.  Izzy: Kill it.  Frenchie: Can you chill for like, two seconds? 

__

Frenchie: My hands are cold.  Izzy: Here, let me hold them.  Frenchie: My lips are cold too.  Izzy: *covers Frenchie's mouth with their hand*

__

Frenchie: *Pulls a glass a water from out of nowhere*  Izzy: Where did you get that?  Frenchie: My pocket.  Izzy: How do you keep a glass of water in your pocket?  Frenchie: Skills.

--

Frenchie: Hey Izzy, have you seen the photographer?  Izzy: Nope. Have you seen the meat tenderizer?  Frenchie, confused: What?  Izzy, grabbing the meat tenderizer out of the drawer: No reason, cute girl things!

--

Izzy: Frenchie! For the love of god, please turn down that music. I have a hangover.  Frenchie: *blasting the mii theme at full volume* That sounds like a you problem, not a mii problem. 

--

Izzy: You want some leftovers?  Frenchie: What are those?  Izzy: You've never had leftovers before?  Frenchie: No, ‘cause I’m not a quitter.

--

Frenchie: Why would you think any of this was a good idea?  Izzy: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.  Frenchie: Izzy: I don’t know how you keep forgetting this.

--

Frenchie: *nudges Izzy at 3am* Pretty fucked up that we depict the moon as a girl and the sun as a boy. They're just floating rocks in space. Izzy? Wake up, Izzy! Listen! They're sexless!  Izzy: The sun isn't a rock, go back to sleep. 

--

Frenchie: I printed up a bunch of fake safety inspection certificates. Go slap one on anything that looks like a lawsuit.  Izzy: Frenchie, is that legal?  Frenchie: When the cops aren’t around, anything’s legal!

--

Frenchie, texting Izzy: *sends a voice message*  Izzy, texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent?  Frenchie: No, don’t worry, just listen later.  *later*  Izzy: *presses play*  Frenchie's voice message: THERE’S A FIRE-

--

Izzy: We just ate. Why are you making pancakes?  Frenchie: For the dogs.  Izzy: Why are you making pancakes for the dogs?  Frenchie: They don't know how.

--

Izzy: You’re giving me a sticker?  Frenchie: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!”  Izzy: I’m not a preschooler.  Frenchie: Fine, I’ll take it back-  Izzy: I earned this, back off!

INCORRECT QUOTES ANON IS BACK FUCK YES I LOVE THEM

[stickycave]

BoaF Shaun

You've always been more accustomed to the water than the air, your wings the best made for it. So you head to the river.

You take off, knowing where you can hide out for the season. Your wings are one of the best suited in the flock for water. 

The river's surface is wild as the rapid water rolls. Your sleek feathers and years of play have taught you how best to use them as fins. Plunging into the currants, the water has a chill you've gotten accustomed to even in the growing cold season. You speed down with water, a flash of shadow under the ripples as you head for the lake where reeds will hide you from any potential mates and the underwater plant life will entangle the ones who find you.

Sound is different underwater but even with the water rushing by your ears, you know you hear something in near you, darting past, no, not darting past you, you darted past it. A splash above you. It repeats a few times, something just barely brushing past you from the opposite direction, too consistent to be wood or rock. 

Something keeps flying ahead of you and diving into the water, trying to catch you with each swoop. The blood in your veins turns cold as the water, heart beating in your ears like the thundering waves around you. Predicting their moves, you fake right and left, but you can only go for so long, an ache spreading through your wings from effort and cold.

You will not make it to the river's end.

You have to make a move.

No more dodging or weaving, you keep a steady path straight ahead, faking to be more tired than you really are, slowing down. Listening carefully, taking advantage of how sound moves faster through the water, you wait. There. As soon as your hunter breaches the surface, your wings give a push and then wrap tight to your body, barrelling you forward. Slamming into the figure, you both tumble through the currants. It holds unyieldingly onto you. Your wings and shoulders crashing into dirt and stones, but your pursuer's holds on you shelters your head and stomach, all your tender parts, even a hand on the back of your neck from any real damage.

When the river spits you both out into the lake it’s like hitting a cushion that would wind you if either of you could breath. Your bodies are too large to move with the tapering strength of the rivers mouth as it joins the softer flows of the lake. What must be arms wrap around your waist as water is pushed around you in one strong gust and you surface. Gasping and panting for breath, the adrenaline of before had distracted you from the burning of your lungs that now feels almost seared into them.

The figure is panting and gasping for its own breath as it pulls you both onto shore, collapsing back, you land on something firm and he starts to laugh, squeezing you as he does, and you realize who it is.

Shaun, your best friend! You push up to see it's his chest you've landed on, your laughter joining his.

“That’s why you were so good in the river!” There’s not a lot in your flock suited or interested in the water, but when you befriended Shaun, he spent many days swooping through the water to join you in play. “Why are you almost drowning me? You should be…”

Your laughing dies down and words trail off, replaced with a warmth spreading over your face. Below you, his eyes are crinkled at the edges from a wide grin, fingers tips just barely tracing the sides of your face. You can note the red out of the corner of your eyes, and realize one of his hands is bleeding on the back.

“I should be what? Putting my feather in your wings?”

Another laugh bubbles form your chest as you realize of all your possible suitors, even in your indecision, a part of you was hoping it’d be him. Maybe that's why you choose the river, even if you didn't realize it at first.

“Yes! You should be, before someone else gets here.”

Shaun’s grin grows impossibly brighter as sits up with you in his lap, making quick work of swapping feathers between you.

“I don't know about you, but I'm starving. Let's eat before we start nesting,” one of his wings unfurls to drop a pile of fish into the grass. You can't tell if he's really hungry or already showing off how well he'll look after you and your future clutch.

---

back to start

[bh-writingdump]

Lock Me Up [Draft]

More clattering, rhythmic like a rumble of instruments playing together except eir bones. Ey writes in the air.

[Lock me up.]

Ey stumbles over a nearby doo, handing you handcuffs.

[I can’t be trusted.]

“I’m not locking you up. Cmon, let’s talk about this on very comfortable couch.”

You plop down on the couch. “Ahh, even better than I remember.” the mathematician merely gawks at you, unable to piece together how to solve this puzzle.

“Sit here or don’t. I don’t mind.” You kick up your feet, laying along the couch like a king.

Not a moment latter you feel a weight on your chest and a pair of eye lights boring into yours. You blink, catlike. “Nope. Chill.” You put hand into the rowdy skeleton’s face, letting yourself relax. “Not dead. Fun fact, skeletons can sit miraculously still and still be counted among the living.

At first, there’s a hard pressure of unspent build up magic pelting your hand. The longer you hold it there, the more it makes your hand tingle until you wonder why those teeth are still planted there.

“I could’ve killed you.” Ey whispers like it’s a secret only between them. Those once sharp eye lights softening at the corners.

“No intent.” You tap eir skull. “Gotta muster up a little hate if you hope to dust me.”

Ey reassesses you. taking in everything from your prominent brow to the scars across your nasal ridge. “Wanna know how I got these scars?”

The little mathematician’s nose scrunches.

“On a beautiful autumn afternoon, my arch nemesis Dovakin set u p a most devious trap that led me to wet the bed at the tender age of 6. So naturally, I declared a dual. I brough ta wooden sword. The dastardly Dovakin summoned a rake. Don’t worry, the other joy looked far worse.”

“Yet, you couldn’t reach the conclusion of how idiotic that is.”

“Hmph, was that a pun?”

This time, it’s eir turn to cover your mouth.

You mumble through it. “Kids are agents of chaos, they can’t help it.” You sigh, slumping further into the couch. “Mind if I nap here?”

“Yes.”  Fake snoring sounds ripple from your lips. “That means leave.”

You drag yourself from the couch sighing.

“I won’t charge you this time due to my… lack of consistency but it won’t happen next time. Be at my door by 8 sharp tomorrow morning—”

“Your door?”

“Yes, my door unless you know of another one that belongs to me.”

“Fair but you own several.”

“I do not… nevermind. Get out.”

“Damn and I thought we’d goo out for ice cream afterwards.”

“You saw what—”

“S you’d go if something was different?” you smirk. “Sweet tooth.”

“I didn’t say that!”

“Let me get your groceries and I’ll treat. How about that?” You say before actually understanding what you were offering. More savoring the way your shorter companion’s shoulders drop and unwind.

For once, your words rather than actions give em pause. “You’re offering?”

You nod, your mind going blank.

“Be back in an hour.” Ey sets cash on the table.

Let’s just say that King size drumsticks were the wrong choice of dessert.

[yanderetolove]

(Imma try this just for the heck of it, because Lord knows how down on my luck I've been recently :'') )

Name/nickname: Shadow / Kakyoin

Age: 28

Birthday: November 30th

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Pronouns: She / Her / They

Yandere or non-yandere: I am a non yandere looking for a yandere

What you like: Dogs, cats, honesty, games, Monster energy drink, chilling, swimming, Slime Rancher, Ponytown, anime, WWF/WWE, ect

What you dislike: Liars, cheaters, abusers, fake claimers, people who mock me for my comforts, ect

Age range in a partner: 20-30-40

Are you poly? HELL NO

Your idea of a "perfect" partner: Somebody who will love me unconditionally. Somebody who would be patient, loving, caring, and tender with me. Somebody who will be there to give some comfort when in need, but also cling on and tell me how much they love me as much as I love them back. I'm not the most perfect one out there, I will admit it I have my flaws, but I just want somebody who will understand me and love me no matter what... Affection is all I crave for, to be obsessed over and possessed is like a dream come true to me. I just want to be needed.

Your deal breakers: Make a joke about my illnesses, threaten my only family, lie or cheat on me. You're done, no second chances given.

Country/continent: Europe.

Contact information: You can contact me for now through Tumblr @giogiosbizarreplace and once I'm comfortable enough I'll give ya my discord :D

Extra(s): A lot of baggage in my life, but I'll share once I get to know you better and once I'm comfortable enough. All ya need to know is I am seeking medical and professional help for the mental illness in question.

Your submission's up :)

[witchcraftandburialdirt]

"Ohhh my, someone is in a bad mood," His voice mocks her with such a long repressed snarl, gums finally showing themselves which framed sharp, pearly teeth that his tongue runs over. Abel slaps her lasher away with ease, turning back down to gaze at Robin, who was seemingly in his own world, perhaps he couldn't even see Abel. Perhaps the demon was not letting him. The entity's stare clashes with Evelynn's as he snarls once more with venomous rattles within his words, "You're lucky I realized he was in this damn town, and decided to see what he was up to--Would you have perferred it otherwise…? --I should have let him suffocate under that body, maybe then I could gift you his corpse a second time. That day was one of the most curious days I've experienced, you bled emotions like swine for me, your own agony recycling itself into your food--What a hilarious result."

He snarls down at her, pushing their foreheads together as he continues to berate and harass, not easing up for a second. "Your failure as a demon was so horrendous that the Gods must have looked upon you with pitiful enough gazes to give that boy a second life. How noble of you," Abel's voice contorted, pitching upward into a perfect imitation of her little birdie, "Miss Evelynn." Although the laugh after was rumbled and low, his own body tenses as he hears Robin choke on his own blood, finally he pulls away from her and kneels back down to him after pushing the body off with ease, demon and all.

There is a tender way in which he cradles Robin's skull, a bizarre shift within his behavior that he swallows down a seething comment for one that's less acidic, "I died that day too, Eve, don't forget that." Abel gazes down to Robin with quiet recognition that the entity struggles to comprehend once more, how many centuries had it been since he had lived? Since Abel had existed? Since that horrifically bloody day that for the first time in all of eternity, two demons wept and screamed over something as simple as a human. With this form reattached to its core…it was unsure how much of that anguish was real or fake. If it felt real…was that enough to make it so?

The thought chilled Abel.

"I can't heal him. I don't have that sort of connection with this boy, but I can keep him stable until you call another pack of humans to take care of him, after all I…I still..."

The words trail off into a quiet drone that fills the alley with nothing but Robin's dwindling cries and the blaring of cars just outside their estranged bubble. Abel is loathed to bring it out, but he shifts to reach into his suit pocket and procures an earring crafted far too long ago. One that used to hang from a mage's ear who spoke about curing a polluted city, and who nursed animals back to health…The metal had barely rusted, implying that it had been taken care of throughout the years, the blue water within each orb swishing as he sets it down upon Robin's chest. Abel does not look to Eve as Robin's whimpers begin to fade, as the jewelry recognizes its owner and tries to keep him alive as it had so long ago.

"Use my phone."

It's a normal Thursday night -- at least it's meant to be. Ahri's scheduled yet another rehearsal, aiming to perfect their number before they even think about beginning their music video. They're just on their second break, for which Evelynn is more than grateful for.

Her phone is, per usual, blowing up with notifications which causes a questioning look from Kai'sa and Akali across the booth. It takes a simple glance, half lidded from her shades, for them both to peer in another direction before she returns her attention back to her cellphone. It is not long before a scowl consumes her features, grim taking hostage.

INCOMING CALL: ABEL (FUCKER)

Evelynn swears her vision turns red, the grip on her phone intensifying to the point that she barely catches herself before she nearly snaps the sad device in two. Violent memories overcome her, like she's back all those years ago bearing witness to the catastrophe before her. All the blood, the hopelessness that held in his gaze as the other demon finally presented itself.

How she was too late.

She could laugh, because Evelynn? Caring for a human?

Yet, despite it all, she swipes her thumb right to answer the call and quickly brings the device to her face. "The fuck do you--" and she cuts herself off, the mangled sobs piercing her. It makes her breath hitch in a way she doesn't like, hand coiling at her side as she knows her lashers dare to materialize.

Little birdie.

"Fuck." Is all she's able to say, scream even. To the point it catches the rest of her band off guard, Ahri's tail rising as Evelynn knows she's so very close to presenting a rather unpleasant side of herself. She doesn't shoot an apologetic look -- hell, she doesn't even spare them another glance as she's already rushing out of the studio, purse discarded and the keys to her Lamborghini jingling in her hand. Everything feels like it's racing as his voice cuts through the receiver once more.

Evelynn is barely in her car, engine roaring before she she speaks again. "Dare to even touch him and I'll be sure to send you into the next centaury." She doesn't even have to imagine the smirk he swears, how it causes her to growl in several tones as she shifts gears. "Keep him there, I'm a block away."

Normally, she's not this crazed of a driver. It would be a shock to many to know a simple law keeps Evelynn abide, yet she throws all care for that out the window with a sole purpose on her mind: Robin.

Failure is not something she takes kindly to, nor is a reminder to a past she's long put behind (or so she likes to tell herself and Ahri). And for Abel to taunt that, when it was him (yet not quite) who brought this whole scenario upon her then, it fuels a fire whose coals had been so cold. She swerves her car to the right, narrowly avoiding a law abiding citizen who absolutely had a green light (and yes, she has the audacity to flip them off), she's more than relieved to see a parking space by the corner of the two streets.

She ignores the meter, because she doesn't give a flying fuck about that, and takes off in a sprint. Which, is a sight to see considering the heels she's donning. Her phone is buzzing in one hand -- likely Ahri bitching about where she ran off to -- and her keys she's locked into a fist in her other. Evelynn finds the alley, practically skidding and taking down it.

Her senses guide her, the alluring temptation of food driving her forward. Like a finely cooked meal, now gone with all but crumbs for her to consume.

The scattered bodies, that she assumes either Abel or someone else killed she disregards. Not her problem -- her concern remains with the bloody heap that the shadow of a man hovers over. Such a scene, similar to all those years ago that instinct takes over her. The knowledge of the lack of prying eyes has her close the distance between them in seconds, a suddenly very clawed hand grabbing Abel by the neck and lifting him to his feet.

She completely ignores how her phone drops, shattering in the process.

"How long have you been following him?!" she barks, closing her own face onto his. Her eyes hue, glowing in the alley as she lets out a breath and presents her fangs. "Wasn't once enough?!"

Evelynn spares another glance down, churning at the very sight. She's unsure of how much longer he'd survive out here, but she knows she needs to rid the both of them of this nuisance.