#that I could finally have someone else handle situations and emotions completely | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

vodika-vibes · 5 months

Note

You are a true blessing to this generation of Star Wars fans tbh

May I have female (ex Jedi) inquisitor!reader x empire!cody

Can be fluff or something more serious like an interrogation or a mission

Love you sm <33

It Only Takes A Spark

Summary: Your relationship with Commander Cody is wrong. You know it. He knows it. Yet, neither of you are willing to let the other go.

Pairing: Purge Trooper Cody x F!Inquisitor Reader

Word Count: 2764

Warnings: Mentions of Torture, though nothing is shown in detail

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni @imabeautifulbutterfly

A/N: So...when you said you wanted imperial cody and imperial reader, you really meant you want almost 15 pages of these two doing everything in their power to stay together in spite of everything thrown against them, with a little fix-it hand waving. Right? Because that's what I wrote, lol.

“Ma’am,” You open your eyes and turn your gaze towards the man standing in the doorway, “We’re about to land.”

“Thank you Commander,” You reply, your voice soft as you slowly push to your feet. Pain shoots up your legs, a lingering gift from the Grand Inquisitor.

Commander Cody remains in the doorway, his expression blank but there’s a hint of concern leaking through the force, and you can only sense it because of how well you know the man. “Are you in need of medical treatment, ma’am?”

“I’m afraid that this is nothing that can be fixed, Commander.”

There’s a sharp burst of irritation and frustration and despair, and you glance at him. You know that he’s irrationally protective of you, and you know that he hates everything about this situation, but he’s usually better at containing himself than this.

For a moment there’s no movement, and then Commander Cody reaches out and presses the button that controls the door, allowing the door to slide shut. The room dims, no longer lit by the bright lights of the main part of the ship.

You watch as he pulls his helmet off and stares at you. “The Grand Inquisitor tortured you again, didn’t he?” He’s trying, so hard, to hide the fury in his voice, but he’s not trying hard enough to hide from you.

“You know I’m not a very good Sith, Cody.” You remind him gently, “I felt too deeply as a Jedi, and my Master thought that that would make me a good Sith. Instead I just became…apathetic.”

“You’re hardly apathetic, sarad.”

You glance at him, and tilt your head slightly, “I think you see more of me than anyone else.”

“That I can believe.” Cody absently passes his helmet from one hand to the other, “Tell me, do you think we’ll find a Jedi on this planet?”

You’re quiet for a long moment, “No.” You finally admit, “I think the Grand Inquisitor doesn’t expect us to find anyone here either, but we have to investigate anyway.”

“Good. I’m so…tired of hunting Jedi.”

You’re quiet for an even longer moment, “You volunteered for the position, Cody. You could have stayed a regular trooper.”

“Yeah, and we both know that it’s the only way that I was going to get that advanced aging issue handled.” Cody scoffs, “Plus…” He pauses, “Nevermind.”

“Go ahead. Speak your mind.”

“Joining the Purge Troopers meant that I’m able to protect you, sarad.” He frowns, “Well, in theory. I still can’t protect you from the Grand Inquisitor.” It’s a ridiculous sappy notion, and yet you can’t help but feel touched.

You shake your head, putting the emotions in the little box with all of the other things deserving of your protection, “You worry too much.”

“Someone has to.” Cody replies, and he sounds so tired that you feel a sting of guilt.

He doesn’t belong here. He’s too good for this life, for the Empire. But then, you’ve always known that.

The comm on his wrist chimes, and you watch as he glances at it. Cody exhales slowly, and for a moment his emotions are a whirlwind around him, before they vanish completely, and he pulls his helmet on, “We’ll be landing in five, Ma’am. Will you be joining us up front?”

You don’t answer for a moment, and then you nod once and pull your own helmet on. “Lead the way, Commander.”

Cody leads you through the small ship, and he settles himself at your shoulder as it lands on the planet's largest landing pad. Hardly necessary, you think, but people are funny about Inquisitors showing up on their planet.

You walk down the landing ramp, and a trembling man greets you on the landing pad. “It’s an honor to have an Inquisitor on our humble planet,” He stammers, wringing his hands, “But I assure you, there are no Jedi on Mora.”

“Perhaps.” Your voice is flat, “A report was made, and so we shall investigate. I trust this will not be an issue.”

“No, no! Of course not!” Somehow the Governor wrings his hands even more, “However, if you do find a Jedi…I hope you know that we aren’t harboring them willingly-”

“I will not make any accusation until I determine whether or not there is a Jedi on this planet.” You interrupt, “I wish to speak with the man who made the report.”

“I…yes…of course.” The governor nervously turns his back on you, “This way. I will be more than happy to show you where he lives.”

“You already know who made the report?” Commander Cody asks.

“Well, yes. He was very proud of it, you see.”

You’re sure that if Cody wasn’t wearing his helmet, he’d be glaring at the Governor hard enough that he’d burst into flames. And, frankly, you don’t blame him. Everything about this situation is screaming that it’s going to be a false report afterall.

Still, a job is a job, so you allow the nervous man to lead you through the winding streets, until you reach a massive house. The Governor’s house, he explains proudly. There’s a young teenage boy sitting on the front steps, nervousness rolling off of him in waves.

The boy looks at you, and then at Cody, and then back to you. Before he looks at the Governor, “You never said that actual Inquisitors would come to interrogate me!” He blurts.

The Governor glares at the boy, and opens his mouth to say something, but you take a step forward, and he stills. “Commander,”

“Ma’am?”

“Ensure the Governor here doesn't run off. Feel free to shoot him if you have to.” You order. You hear Cody unholster his pistols, and the Governor whimpers in fear, but then you’re focused on the boy.

He’s Pantoran, with messily cut lavender hair. His eyes are wide with terror. His clothes are filthy, but not the carefully curated filth that you’d expect from a teenage boy…more like someone who works hard labor.

“You are the person who made the report?” You ask.

“Y-yes ma’am. But I wouldn’t of if I knew that you’d actually come here.” He blurts.

“Then why did you?”

“Um…well…” He nervously fumbles with an old comm, “We…a message went out…”

“ A message?”

“Yeah.”

“Show me.”

The boy opens a message on his comm and hands the small device to you. There, written in black and white, is the message the boy mentioned. A monetary reward to anyone who reports a jedi to the planetary government.

“We…my ma and pa…we don’t have a lot of money. And I thought…that amount of credits would be enough that we’d have enough food-” The boy rambles, “I’m sorry for wasting your time-”

You pass the comm back to the boy, “Did you ever receive your payment?”

“Yes ma’am, though it was a lot less than he promised.”

“Hm.” You turn your attention to the Governor, “You can go.” You say to the boy. You remain still and quiet as he runs off, and it’s only when you’re sure that the boy won’t get involved that you speak again, “I’m find myself very curious,” You murmur, “As to why you might want an Inquisitor and a Purge Trooper on your planet.”

“I…I didn’t have a choice.”

“Is that right?”

“You have to believe me.”

“I think you’ll find that I do not have to do anything.” You correct quietly, “Commander, bring the Governor inside. We need information from him.”

“Yes ma’am,”

You absently wave your hand at the door, using the force to force it open to allow Cody access to the building. You follow him inside, and shut the door behind you.

“Do you wish to be present for the interrogation, ma’am?”

“It is probably for the best.”

“As you say.”

It takes Cody three hours to pull all of the information out of the Governor, and you watch, impassively, as the nervous man’s body lies sprawled on the ground between the pair of you.

“What do you think?” Cody asks as he cleans his knife.

You’re quiet for a long time, “I think it’s incredibly ballsy for him to claim that that Rebellion forced him to do this.”

“I agree.” Cody checks his knife and then slides it back into its holster, “That said, the Rebellion would probably do a lot of things to get their hands on an Inquisitor and a Purge Trooper.”

You pull your gaze away from the body, “You believe that we are the targets then?”

“Would make sense, wouldn’t it?

“It would.” You agree, “Generally speaking, hunting the Rebellion falls under the purview of the Imperial Army, not the Inquisitors or Purge Troopers.”

“You’re not wrong.” He’s quiet, “We should return to the ship and leave. I do not want you in any more danger than you have to be.”

You open your mouth to say something, and then you pause and tilt your head. “Ah. I fear that this is no longer our decision.”

“What do you-?”

Cody isn’t able to finish as the door bursts open, revealing a large group of people in mismatched armor, led by a man wielding a purple lightsaber.

“...well, it looks like there actually is a Jedi on this planet, ma’am.” Cody says dryly.

“So it would appear.”

Mace Windu, who you thought was dead, slides into the opening stance of Vaapad. “Lower your weapons. You’re both under arrest.”

“Well, seeing as you don’t have any actual authority in the galaxy, I would argue as to the legality of the word arrest,” You say flatly, “But very well. Stand down Commander.”

Cody pauses, and he releases a heavy sigh, as he slowly lowers his weapon to the ground and raises his hands. You, however, just raise your hands.

Mace Windu pulls your lightsaber from your waist, and hooks it on his own, and he roughly slaps force suppressors around your wrists.

Which is unfortunate, really. Since the force was the only thing keeping you conscious.

The last thing you hear as the world goes dark is Cody’s loud cursing.

Cody impatiently paces the cell that he’s been thrown in.

Well, it’s a room, with its own fresher and a very comfortable bed. But it’s still locked from the outside, which makes it a very comfortable cell, but a cell all the same.

He feels naked without his armor, but he does understand why he wasn’t allowed to keep it. He wouldn’t have allowed an enemy combatant to keep their armor either.

At least they gave him clothes to wear. Comfortable clothes even.

And he is getting three meals a day, though, tellingly, no one has come to deliver the meals personally. Instead they’re being delivered by Skywalker’s protocol droid.

Not that Cody’s been too eager to talk to anyone.

His mind is locked on his sarad. And on the way she crumpled when the cuffs were slapped around her wrists.

Cody’s no fool. He knew that she was badly injured. He knew that she was using the Force to keep herself going. He hadn’t, however, been aware as to the extent of her injuries.

If he had he wouldn’t have allowed her to leave the ship at all.

Not that it matters at this point, of course.

He’s pulled out of his thoughts at the sound of his cell door sliding open. Cody half expects to see that damned droid again, so he’s genuinely surprised to see Rex and Wolffe standing there.

With Obi-Wan Kenobi standing behind them.

“Cody!” Rex and Wolffe hurry into the room, stopping several feet away from him, “You’re alive!” Rex says, “I thought…for sure-”

“As if I would die so easily,” Cody replies, “I heard that you went down with your ship, though.”

“Yeah, well…” He shrugs awkwardly, “I did. I got lucky.”

“How’d you become a Purge Trooper, vod. I thought only NatBorns were slated for that.” Wolffe says, a frown on his face.

“It makes sense,” Obi-Wan says from the back of the room, “Anakin would absolutely want to keep you close.”

“I volunteered.” Cody says flatly, and when the three men jerk back in surprise, he continues, “Where is she? The Inquisitor I was with. What did you do to her?”

“She’s in the infirmary.” Rex answers without thinking, “We didn’t hurt her, vod.”

“I want to see her.”

“No one’s being allowed to see her.” Obi-Wan says, “She’s too dangerous.”

Cody’s smile is all teeth, “I’m dangerous. And I’m going to be more so unless you let me see her. And that is a goddamn threat.”

“Okay, easy there vod.” Wolffe says, “General, we can let him see her, right? So this doesn’t become a thing?”

“I think we probably should.” Obi-Wan agrees, sounding slightly shaken, “You’re not going to cause any problems, are you commander?”

“That depends on her.”

“Okay, that’s fair.” Obi-Wan pushes his hand through his graying hair, “Let’s go then.”

The infirmary where they’re keeping his sarad isn’t that far away. Which makes sense, you wouldn’t want an infirmary for prisoners located in the same place as an infirmary for everyone else.

Obi-Wan opens the door with a wave of a keycard, and then Cody ignores the three men walking with him. He pushes between his brothers and crosses the room to the bed where his sarad is sitting and peering out the barred windows.

“Hey,” She turns at the sound of his voice and he jolts when he sees her normal eye color, rather than the striking gold he had gotten used to, “Look at you.” Cody murmurs as he sits on the edge of the bed and presses a hand against her cheek, “No gold.”

Her lips turn up into the tiniest smile, “No force.” She offers as she holds up a single wrist.

“Are you okay?”

She considers his question for a moment, “I’m not in pain,” She finally says, “I had forgotten what it was like to not be in pain.”

“Oh, sarad.”

“I’m okay, Cody.” She reassures quietly, “Are you?”

“Yeah. They’ve been very kind so far.” He carefully tucks some of her hair behind her ear, “Has anyone come to talk to you yet?”

“No. No one.”

“Well, that’s okay then.” Cody says with a sigh, “I’d be cross if they were interrogating you while you were recovering from a medical procedure.”

“You’ll be cross anyway,” she points out as she lifts one hand to press against his, “You’re so protective.”

“Someone has to be.” Cody replies.

Her small smile fades slightly, “Cody…”

“Hm?”

“...if you want to stay here. To stay with your brothers…I wouldn’t tell anyone.” She says quietly, “You…don’t belong with the Empire.”

“And you do?” Cody asks, not touching on her first comment.

She drops her gaze, “We both know that my master will never let me go. You don’t deserve to suffer my fate.”

“My place, sarad,” Cody replies as he uses a single finger to lift her chin, “is by your side. No matter where you might be.” He leans in and lightly bumps his forehead against hers, uncaring for the audience. “It doesn’t matter what you choose. Whether it’s returning to the Empire, staying here with the Rebellion, or moving to Tatooine to pick up moisture farming. I’m going to be right there next to you.”

She stares at him, and then her nose scrunches up adorably, “Moisture Farming?”

“Hey, you never know. Maybe you’ll like it.” It’s something of a relief though, seeing some of her personality peeking through the shroud of apathy she adopted to survive the Empire.

Cody brushes his finger down her cheek, an idea starting to form, “You know…” He murmurs, “We could stay.”

“They’ll never let me stay.”

“They,” Cody says, his voice raising slightly so that their audience can hear you, “are two members of the Jedi Council who were so incapable of doing their duty that they allowed a large number of their padawans to get kidnapped and tortured.”

“...rather uncalled for, Commander.” Obi-Wan mutters from the doorway.

“If and when your Master comes looking for you, he’ll also have to deal with me. And I’ve become very good at killing Force users.” Cody adds with a wry smile.

She sighs softly, and her eyes close, “Alright then.” Her free hand comes up to press against his cheek, “We’ll try it your way.”

“I promise, sarad, no one will ever hurt you again.”

And a genuine smile crosses her face as she moves her other hand to press against his cheek, “Well, if you say so then it must be true.”

#star wars #tcw #commander cody x reader #cody x reader #star wars fanfiction #x reader fanfiction #f!reader fic #answered asks

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aphrodisiac-siren · 7 months

Text

Home~ Neteyam x Metkayina!reader

Summary: Leaving behind everything he knew was hard for Neteyam and then adapting to the ways of the new clan was even harder. He'd push himself, overwork and exhaust himself even, to live upto his family's expectations; never really giving his own wants a second thought. That's why Y/N was the prefect companion for him, someone who kept things in his life balanced, who made sure to let him know that what he wanted was just as important, perhaps even more so, than what everyone else wanted of him.

//slow burn, cute fluff, Neteyam being a sad bean//

masterlist, Part 4

Part 3

🫧

Jake was sure his eyes would pop out of their sockets any minute now. With every word his sons uttered his blood pressure only went higher and higher to a point where he was sure he was due for a stroke. From what he was hearing he was affirmative he passed down only a singular braincell that was being shared by his sons.

"You said what" Jake's voice cracked, hand flying up to pull at his hair "Neteyam she is the chief’s daughter!"

"I know, I screwed up" the older boy hung his head in shame, still cringing at how he handled the situation.

"And you didn’t disappoint as well did ya? You beat up the chief’s son" Jake turned to Lo'ak who was also looking everywhere but at him "He takes us in, trains us and this is how you show appreciation? By harassing his kids"

"He was picking on Kiri" Lo'ak tried to defend himself, knowing well that it wouldn’t work.

"Go make peace with Aonung" his father sighed "I don’t care how you do it but just.. go"

Lo'ak walked away in defeat, in no mood whatsoever to argue. Besides, he did agree that the situation could’ve been handled better and they both did contribute to making the situation worse than it already was.

"And I didn’t really expect this from you of all people" Jake continued once his youngest son was out of earshot "what were you thinking, talking to the poor girl like that?"

"I'm sorry, I was being an idiot" Neteyam apologised. He had kept his own feelings under wraps for so long, only concerned with looking after his siblings to a point where he had finally reached his limit and like a bomb, exploded earlier that day "I'll go fix it"

"Damn right you will" His dad let out another disappointed sigh "now get outta here"

Neteyam dragged his feet through the sand, absolutely dreadding having to face Y/N again. He was sure she hated him now, she'd made it pretty clear by letting them know that she wouldn’t volunteer to train them any longer and he wanted to run into a wall for ruining everything. His siblings liked her, they loved every second they spent with the girl and he made a mess of it by allowing his emotions to possess him.

He begrudgingly searched around the village, not really sure of what he could possibly say that would fix the damage he caused.

What he did not expect, on top of all of this, was to find Y/N with his mother. They both were practising archery, or more like Y/N was struggling to keep up with Neytiri.

"Yes, keep your shoulders pushed back" She circled the younger girl, giving her helpful critique "no, don’t hold on to the arrow so tightly"

The boy sheepishly approached, a bit more nervous than what he already was.

“Neteyam?” His mother called out when she finally saw him, shifting even Y/N’s attention to him. The moment her saphire eyes landed on him, he felt small, all his pride and confidence from before withering away under her gaze.

“Am I interrupting?” He asked, offering a polite smile nonetheless.

“No, you can come and help Y/N” Neytiri responded. She knew her children liked to spend time with the girl, completely oblivious of the events that took place earlier that day.

“It’s okay” Y/N immediately butted in, keeping her voice steady “he’s probably got other stuff to do”

“Not really” Neteyam knew she didn’t want him there but he wasn’t going to leave until he had a chance to properly apologise “no lessons today, remember?”

“Why not?” His mother asked, curiously.

“I got held up with something” Y/N lied convincingly and Neteyam understood that she wasn’t planning on telling anyone about what happened earlier. He was a smidge grateful for it, he wasn’t really wanting to earn a scolding from his mother as well.

“I can help you with this you know” he tried again, pushing his luck and hoping she’d just let him stay.

“No thank you, I’m fine” she snapped without missing a beat, looking toward the makeshift target once again and away from him.

Neytiri glanced between the two teens. The tension among them was intense and evident. What had suddenly caused such a weird atmosphere between them?

Her eyes searched her son’s and he stared right back her pleadingly and she could tell that he wanted to be around Y/N whilst she was actively trying to be rid of him. Something clearly went down between the both of them and the best thing to do was to take a step back and let the two of them sort things out.

“I have to make sure Tuk is with Kiri” the older woman made up a reason to excuse herself “I will be back, keep practicing”

She gave her son a look before she walked away, leaving behind a thankful Neteyam and an annoyed Y/N.

“Here” he sweetly approached her, reaching out to fix her form but she simply shifted away with an ‘I’m good’ and continued to shoot arrows that missed the target “trust me, I’m just trying to help”

Still not meeting his gaze, Y/N silently nocked another arrow. This time she didn’t scoot away from him so Neteyam took it as a ‘go’ for him to help her out. He was quite good at archery, he’d earned good praise from the other hunters in his clan.

He placed his hands under her forearms to raise her hand a bit that had begun to droop from tiredness. He then lifted her elbows slightly, inching closer until his nose was almost grazing her cheek.

“Loose” he whispered, right before she let the arrow whizz through the wind and hit the target. Not the centre, but still quite close. Impressive really for someone’s first lesson.

“I did it!” She happily chirped, as if she’d forgotten she was upset with him. Her face lit up and she chuckled with pure joy before she cleared her throat, regaining her stoic composure.

“I’m sorry about what I said” he wasted no time, lest she picked up her stuff and left. She already seemed to not want him around “it was arrogant and ungrateful of me. I was trying to defend my siblings but I guess I ended up letting out all of my pent up frustration on you, a-and that was wrong of me”

He was relieved that she at the very least was listening to him so he continued.

“I didn’t mean what I said, that you’re nothing more than a privileged girl” he looked at her, hoping she’d meet his eyes but she didn’t “we both know that’s not true and I fully understand why you wouldn’t want to be around me anymore. I won’t show up to your lessons if that’s what you want, but don’t distance yourself from Lo’ak, Kiri, Tuk- they like to be around you”

“That’s not what I want you know” she put away the bow to go retrieve the many arrows that had missed the target, now scattered in the sand “I thought we’d all get along. I liked being around them too, you included”

Neteyam’s ears pointed upward, like a child hearing praise from a parent.

“But then you said the most cruel things today, things I never thought you’d ever utter” she continued sadly “and I thought maybe I was wrong about you-“

“I’m sorry” he said again, feeling really stupid that that’s all he could really say “it’s been hard leaving the forest. That was my home, it’s all I’ve ever known. And then all of a sudden I’m in a place where I don’t know how to do the simplest of things, I feel useless”

“You aren’t useless, I know Aonung likes to poke fun and I know you miss your home but I really wished you’d just come and spoken to me about it instead of being mean to me” she finally looked at him, her pretty eyes saddened “I thought we’d be friends”

“We can be!” He said almost too enthusiastically, cheeks heating up slightly at his childish eagerness “I’ll make it up to you”

“How” she crossed her arms and tilted her head, patiently waiting for him to come up with something.

Neteyam pouted as he thought for a minute, wondering what he could possibly do for the daughter of Tonowari that would make her give him another chance. She was already a princess of a sort, probably too used to receiving gifts.

After another minute of thinking, he broke into a grin.

“Wait here” he held his hands out in front of him, asking her to stay put

“Huh-“ Y/N walked behind him, her hand dropping the arrows to the ground again “I’m still mad at you Neteyam”

“You won’t be after this” he smirked at her before fully breaking into a sprint “hopefully”

Y/N watched the boy run off into the distance, wondering what he could possibly do to change her mood.

Knowing some of the boys here on the island, most of them would give her shells or wild flowers when she’d be upset. And if not the small gifts, then a forced apology that Aonung bullied them into.

She loved her brother, despite his pride and snarky attitude. Which is why she was also very protective of him. If he was at fault, she’d confront him no doubt but privately, away from the eyes of the public. She wasn’t the type to tell him off and embarrass him in front of anyone else who wasn’t their family. Which is why when she saw him scuffed up earlier, her initial response was for him to go and get himself looked after.

Did she really not deal with it correctly?

Did she favour her brother to much for his own good?

No, definitely not.

The familiar sound of flapping was what made her look up, taking away her thoughts completely from the situation she was thinking about.

“Y/N” Neteyam called out to her even though she already knew it was him.

His majestic ikran let out a screech as it made its descent, landing in the sand gracefully a few feet away from the girl.

“It’s really cool that you can swim fast and all, but I think you’ll find flying even cooler” he patted his ikran’s back, at the space right behind him on the saddle “come on”

Y/N was excited, probably a little too much. Her heart began to flutter and eyes were probably doing that thing again of just staring at the beast with wonder. She slowly walked toward the boy, trying to conceal her enthusiasm.

Neteyam chuckled at her reaction. It was obvious she was dying to get on but he knew she wouldn’t just show it on her face.

“First time seeing an ikran?” He joked, quoting himself during their first encounter when he caught her gawking. He held his hand out to her, looking at her with that same boyish grin he’d have on his face whenever she was around.

“Shut up” she rolled her eyes playfully as she took his hand, swinging one leg over the saddle and seating herself right behind him.

“Hold on tight” he turned around slightly to look at her, faces merely inches apart. Her eyes had flecks of lilac in them, he noted, something he hadn’t really noticed before “you’re going to love this”

Y/N did as she was told, wrapping her arms around his middle as he clicked his tongue a few times. His ikran spread out its large wingspan, letting out a short screech before flapping its wings and taking off.

Y/N shut her eyes tightly at the first gust of wind that blew against her face, tightening the grip around the boy’s torso.

“Open your eyes, you have to see this” she could hear the laughter in his voice as they arose higher and higher into the night sky “don’t worry, I won’t let you fall ma Y/N”

Blindly trusting him, since she was already a couple feet into the sky, she opened on eye and then slowly the other. A smile formed on her lips at how beautiful her home looked from up here. The waters glowed in its bioluminescence and sky was littered with stars.

“You know my dad came from that star” Neteyam pointed it out to her, looking back to see if she was too spotted it “you see it?”

“I see it” she confirmed, her laughter sounding like music to Neteyam’s ears amidst the wind.

As they circled around the village, Neteyam kept glancing back to look at her, as if he wanted to make sure she was truly enjoying this and to admire the smile for which he was responsible.

She doesn’t hate me now, he thought to himself, there’s no way she does anymore.

After a few more rounds around the islands, Neteyam landed his ikran near their shack. He wanted to keep flying, that was the one thing he loved to do even back home but he knew the poor thing was probably tired.

“Had fun?” he asked Y/N on their walk back, knowing the answer already.

“Mhm, I did-“

“Y/N!”

Both her and Neteyam looked toward the source of the sound: Aonung. He looked troubled, still bruised, but not the point.

“I screwed up” he told his sister, throwing a nervous glance at the Sully boy next to her.

“What happened?” His sister asked, looking at him with concern.

“I took Lo’ak to hunt outside the reef” he hesitantly said, refusing to look his sister in the eye and disappoint her even more than he already had “we left him behind as a joke but it’s been a while and he hasn’t come back”

“What” both Neteyam and Y/N exclaimed in sync, eyes going wide with panic.

“Oh my this is bad, this is bad..” Y/N was beginning to grow anxious, pacing around both the boys as she worked herself up even more.

“Hey okay, calm down” Neteyam held her by the shoulders, trying to keep her from falling apart. They needed to keep their heads cool, despite him wanting to punch Aonung in the face again “look Lo’ak might be an idiot but he can handle himself, he’s fine”

Y/N only nodded.

“Now, I’m going to go find my dad and tell him what we know” he glared at Aonung before looking at Y/N again, face softened “you go and tell your father”

“Right” Y/N nodded again, patting his arm “take Aonung with you pretty boy, and I’ll arrange for a few people to go look for Lo’ak”

“Sounds good” he then turned to her brother who was dead silent. He caught him by the back of his neck, not caring if he was rough about it “come on”

The three of them split up, hoping to hurry and find Lo’ak. He knew he’d only just mentioned that his brother was probably fine but he couldn’t deny he was worried shitless. This was a new turf, some place they were still unfamiliar with and getting lost out here was not something either of them could handle alone. And not to- wait..

She thinks I’m pretty?

#avatar #avatarimagine #avatar way of water #neteyam x reader #writing #fanfiction #neteyam imagine #avatar imagine #avatar fanfiction #lo'ak imagine #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak fanfiction #neteyam fanfiction #jamie flatters

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remotepixel · 8 months

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Hi!! Can you write something for the platonic Yandere Avengers with a meta–human teenage reader? Something resembling emotion management. The reader can cause apathy, joy, etc. BUT at the same time he does not want to deal with the avengers

Hi!!! Thank you for requesting!

Tw: yandere themes + kidnapping mentions.

The way you meet the Avengers would really depend on how vocal you are about your powers.

-If you’re a vigilante of sorts, relying on triggering criminal’s emotions and fighting them head on, they would reach out first (they don’t really want unidentified superpower kids running around).

-If you hide/use your powers for smaller things, it would probably be another event (e.g. winning a national competition) that draws their attention to you.

Either way, as time progresses, you’re able to clearly see their obsessiveness surrounding you, and, obviously, you don’t want to be apart of that.

-Apathy was the first emotion you tried. If they simply didn’t care about you, they would you leave you alone, yeah?

-Yeah, no.

-If they didn’t yet know of your powers, they could take a good guess now.

Obviously all of them wouldn't be fans of it but I think Tony would hate your powers the most.

-He already struggles to deal with his feelings so constantly supplying him with more messes with his head, especially when it's a clear sign you don't like him.

-He would spend hours reaching in hopes of finding a solution.

Natasha would be a close second.

-Growing up as a spy who was taught to lack any emotion, there's a lot of unprocessed feelings still there.

-In a way, the apathy isn't that different from how she normally feels, or at least presents, but knowing someone else is trying to control her emotions again leaves a bitter taste in her mouth.

Steve, on the other hand, doesn't think too much of it.

-He's aware that this is your coping skill and this whole situation is a lot to handle.

-He'll still hang out, trying to ignore the chokehold of unwanted feelings you’re sending his way, and talk to you like normal.

Bruce would probably be uncomfortable but try to follow Steve's footsteps.

-In a way, the apathy is nice compared to the guilt he feels.

-He knows, probably the most out of all of them, the obsessiveness they all feel isn’t normal at all.

-However, he still goes along with Tony’s experiments and ideas of how to stop (or even better, fully get rid) of your powers, despite any regrets he knows he’ll have.

Clint is also a bit reluctant.

-Thanks to having a family on his own, Clint knows how to deal with kids.

-But those ones don’t ignore him and send him the emotional version of a death threat.

-I think he’ll go along with the other avengers for their sakes rather than his.

-He has a family to ground him, make him self-aware and less overbearing as the others, but he’s not going out of his way to stop them either.

Thor’s a bit unaware of how you want nothing to do with them.

-He wouldn’t be good at dealing with your powers, but he’s dealt with Loki for all his life, and he’s sure you’ll turn around eventually.

-He’ll try to ‘deny’ any emotions you’re sending him while acting too casual for a god trying to befriend some teenager.

If you don’t warm up after a few months, they’d resort to kidnapping.

-It wasn’t their favourite idea, since it would definitely take away any process they’ve made (not that it’s much), but it now means they can constantly be around you and you can’t do anything (yay!).

-Your powers would either be taken away, or useless (e.g. staying a certain distance away if it’s range limited), leaving you completely defenceless.

From there, it’s a waiting game for stockholm syndrome to kick in so you can finally realise who your true family :)

#RemotePixel #platonic yandere #yandere mcu #yandere marvel #platonic yandere avengers

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bi-bard · 2 years

Text

Mission - Gary "Eggsy" Unwin Imagine (Kingsman)

Title: Mission

Pairing: Gary "Eggsy" Unwin X Reader

Word Count: 1,058 words

Warning(s): argument

Summary: Eggsy is met with a familiar face when he begins the process of joining the Kingsman. That familiar face is ready for the pieces they so careful put in place to completely fall apart.

Author's Note: I found the first two films for free, so I spent my Sunday watching those. This was caused by those.

-----------------------

It looked bad.

It looked really, really bad.

No matter how I looked at the situation. It all just looked bad.

Eggsy's clearly confused face when he saw me was going to tip off Merlin. I had been trained to handle questioning. But if it was Merlin asking about this specifically, I don't know how well I would be able to hide the truth.

But when Eggsy's face shifted, I felt my heart drop. He looked angry. Angry and confused and sad. I kept facing forward. Reacting to him in any way would tip Merlin off even more. I couldn't afford that.

I had taken a lot of pride in becoming a Kingsman.

Most people would, but mine was just a bit different. It was rare that I felt like I was good at something, but this... this I was good at. I was a damn natural at it.

And then, Eggsy had quite literally stumbled into my life.

A roadblock. An interruption.

I planned on completely forgetting him after we first met.

But we just kept meeting.

I kept a low profile in a place that was apparently close to where Eggsy and his mom were staying. We bumped into each other everywhere. The shop and the pub and just walking around. Like someone was constantly twisting our paths and making it inevitable that we had to meet.

The first time Eggsy asked me out, I refused.

I tried to play it off. Be light-hearted about the whole event. I did like him, but I had a few variables to account for. I truly believed that it was for the best.

And then, he kept asking.

He tried to do the same thing that I was. Play it cool and light-hearted. But he was persistent. Annoyingly persistent.

It was about a month before I finally agreed to join him for a drink.

The rest was history.

A very carefully hidden history, might I add.

I spent so long working my ass off to hide my work with the Kingsman from Eggsy and hide Eggsy from the Kingsman. I wasn't an idiot. I knew very well that what I was doing was dangerous and against the rules of the Kingsman. I just thought that I could handle it. I could juggle all of it without getting caught.

But Eggsy had to end up in the tunning for Lancelot's place. Of course.

And now, I was here, attempting to stare him and the other future recruits down without showing an ounce of emotion.

Needless to say, I almost sprinted away once the task was over.

"Hey!"

Well, I tried.

"Hey!" Eggsy repeated as he grabbed my arm. I yanked myself away, more out of instinct than anything else. "We need to talk."

I froze for a moment before sighing and nodding toward a room that was off to the side. Eggsy followed me.

"I can explain everything," I said.

"I'd quite like that," he replied. "Please, explain to me why you never bothered to tell me that you were a secret agent."

"I couldn't."

"After months? I didn't deserve to know after how long we've been together? How long we've known each other?"

I didn't have an explanation. I never thought that I was gonna need one. I should've been better prepared.

"What was I then?" he snapped. "I was a mission, right? Were you just getting information for Harry-"

"Will you keep your damn voice down-"

"Why," he asked. "Are you embarrassed? Or was I some secret mission? Tell me, did you get grossed out every time we kissed-"

I stepped forward and slapped my hand over his mouth, my other hand grabbing the back of his head.

"Shut up," I muttered.

He glared at me.

"Will you stop shouting if I move my hand away?"

He glared at me again for a couple of moments before finally nodding.

I pulled my hands away and held them up for a few moments as I stepped back.

"You weren't a mission," I explained. "Quite the opposite, actually. Eggsy, you were a risk."

"Well, that makes it better-"

"I could lose my position here," I stopped him. "You aren't supposed to have relationships when you're a part of this group. It's... It's high risk and secret. It's just not meant to happen. Being with you..."

"You did it despite the job, not because of it?"

I nodded. "The only thing I lied to you about was my job. Everything else... everything I felt... that was all real. Every last part of it."

He didn't speak for a moment.

I looked down, opting to play with my fingers instead of looking at him.

His shoes came into my line of sight. I looked back at him.

"Was it worth it," he asked. "Being with me, I mean. Was the risk worth it?"

I let a smile cross my lips. It felt like every memory and emotion that I had experienced with him flew to the forefront of my mind. All of them hitting me at once. Not in a bad way. Not even close.

"Every second of it," I said.

There was a pause as a smirk grew on his face.

"Every second," Eggsy repeated. "Is that right?"

"Don't get cocky about it," I muttered.

"Cocky? Me? Never."

I rolled my eyes but was still smiling.

"So... can we-"

"Not here," I stopped him as he went to lean in. He furrowed his eyebrows. "I... I really can't lose this job. It's the one thing I've been properly good at."

"Alright..."

"Survive the tasks and we'll plan from there," I promised.

"How long will that take exactly?"

"I can't tell you that... first because I'm not supposed to and second because you will hate the answer."

Eggsy seemed to deflate in front of me.

"I'm sorry... I never thought this would happen. I really have no idea what to do about any of this."

"It's alright," he shook his head, reaching out to touch my hand. "I can wait."

"You sure," I asked.

He nodded. "It'll be worth every second."

I scoffed as he spun around on his heels and started walking away.

I tilted my head back a bit and mumbled toward the ceiling, "Dear... whatever entity is out there... please don't get him killed...

"I quite like this one."

-----------------------

Navigation Guide

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

#eggsy unwin x reader #eggsy unwin fanfiction #eggsy unwin imagine #kingsman x reader #kingsman imagine #kingsman fanfiction #imagine #fanfiction #x reader #taron egerton x reader #taron egerton fanfiction #taron egerton imagine

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bringthekaos · 7 months

Note

It's been almost 2 years now, and I can't stop thinking about Jayce's situation in ep 3. Imagine working SO HARD your WHOLE LIFE trying to prove the impossible, to recreate the moment that saved your life, and then BOOM it all gets ripped off in a day. You lose your funding, your friends, disgrace your House, your mentor expells you from the place you worked so hard to get into and are basically declared insane (in front of everyone). You are about to end it all and then out if nowhere the man who arrested you 48 hours before stops you, gives you hope, solves the final piece of the puzzle and risks it all to bring it to fruition for you (and he barely knows you)

Imagine what was like to wake up the next morning

—TW suicide mention—

OHMYGOD same. Like it makes me emotional sometimes, thinking about all that Jayce went through that day just to be hated by the fandom. This poor guy was chasing a dream, something deeply personal. He almost watched his mother die in front of him, and then he was basically gaslit for the rest of his youth by people who doubted that it was magic that saved them, and that he could replicate it through science. But he never gave up, he worked toward it for his entire life, made it his passion, his goal, his meaning. And he was careful, that’s the thing!! He knew what he was doing had the potential to be dangerous, and he took the proper precautions—per Mylo, he locked his balcony! “Who does that?!” He wanted to be as safe as humanly possible as he chased this dream.

And then through no fault of his own, everything came crashing down. Someone with no idea of the volatility of the gemstones ended up handling them, and dropping them. His apartment, his research, and most of his supplies were damaged in the blast, and we’re led to believe that some people on the street below were injured.

He then had his life’s work stripped away, and he was imprisoned for something he didn’t do. Imagine that you had your car safely locked up in your garage and someone broke in and stole it, then used it to hurt people. And they blamed you and arrested you for it, and threatened to derail your entire life. When you did nothing wrong.

And THEN, after all of that, he was put on trial, where he was condescended to and repeatedly called “boy” in front of his peers. And the head of this governing body came to him before the trial and attempted to scare and manipulate him into admitting fault. And he was going to, too, but in a moment of passion he had an outburst, which led to his mother making a desperate bid to save him from exile by standing up and calling her son crazy. You could see how much this hurt Jayce by the way he spun around to look at her—“magic didn’t just save me, it saved you! You’re alive today because of that mage, and now you’re gunna stand here and say I’m not in my right mind?! My own mother, abandoning me in front of God and everyone.” (Personally, I see what she did a little different; she said what she had to in order to save her son, even if she didn’t believe it to be true. She knew it would hurt him, but the alternative was worse. So in the moment, she said the hurtful thing, the thing she thought had the only chance of convincing the council to save him).

But that doesn’t change how badly it hurt him, how it left him feeling truly alone. So alone that he saw no way out. He had no future. He wasn’t prepared to abandon his only dream, his only passion, something he’d literally dedicated every waking breath to from the time he was eight (?) to go work in his father’s factory. And no one else would stand up for him, not his mentor Heimerdinger or his patrons the Kirammans. And he couldn’t even go to his best friend for comfort because they’d been cut off. So he decided to end it.

And then when he was at his lowest, to have such deep trust and confidence shown to him by a complete stranger—a stranger who’s willing to risk his own life and stability to see Jayce’s dream succeed. Who believes in it so wholeheartedly that he’s willing to betray the man Yordle he works for (who also happens to run both the Council AND the University) to get it done. And then in the process, he’s shown another person who’s willing to see what he can do, who believes in him. It’s catching like wildfire, and all it needed was that first spark that Viktor gave it.

I think Jayce must have literally been in shock. What a whiplash of emotions. He probably pinched himself multiple times over those few days, trying to wake himself up. And I imagine Viktor probably caught him once, furrowing his brows down at the reddening mark on the back of Jayce’s hand, the unspoken question in his eyes.

And Jayce probably blushed, looking down at his shoes as he bashfully rubbed the back of his neck and said,

“Oh, uh… just… just making sure I’m not dreaming.”

And that’s probably the first time Viktor felt the butterflies. 🥰

#helpppppppp #I just love them so much #and I want to give Jayce the biggest hug #and bash every Jayce hater over the head with a rubber chicken #arcane #jayce talis #arcane Jayce #arcane viktor #jayvik #(implied)#asks #ace answers

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multiplicity-positivity · 1 year

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Overwhelmed? Take a REST!

We’d like to share a coping strategy that we learned in therapy. Lots of systems have been traumatized, are sensitive, or otherwise struggle to deal with Big Emotions. If you find yourself in this position, the REST strategy may work for you!

REST is an acronym that stands for Relax, Evaluate, Set an intention, and Take action. It can help you remove yourself from a stressful or overwhelming situation, process what’s happening, and learn how to act accordingly!

When to use REST?

You can use REST anytime you are feeling overwhelmed with negative emotions. Our system has alexithymia, which makes us unable to distinguish much about our emotions other than whether or not they are Good or Bad. Fortunately, you don’t need to be super in-tuned to your emotions to use REST! You can use this whenever you are feeling bad. If you’re concerned you may hurt yourself or someone else, are close to tears, can’t stop shaking or shouting, or are having trouble catching your breath, these are all signs that you may need to take a step back. Time to put REST into action!

1) Relax

Try and remove yourself from your current situation. This could mean taking a walk or sitting outside, or simply finding a secluded corner to be by yourself for a while. Plan to be away from your current task for 5 minutes.

Once you’re by yourself, take deep breaths to calm down. Think of things that relax you - look at a stimboard, imagine yourself at the beach, pay attention to the world around you, stretch your muscles, or send your friend a quick text. Remember that you cannot think and make decisions as effectively if you are overwhelmed, and calming down is a necessary step to improving your situation.

Different folks will relax in different ways. Feel free to experiment in order to find a way to relax that works for you. Perhaps have one relaxation technique that you can use at home, and another that you can use when you’re out. If you’re trying to relax in a way that’s not working, abandon it and try something different.

2) Evaluate

Once you’ve calmed down and are able to think a bit more clearly, take some time to evaluate your current situation. Ask yourself questions like:

What is happening around me?

What happened that caused me to be overwhelmed?

What am I feeling currently?

Why am I feeling this way?

Don’t judge yourself for your feelings, situation, or initial reactions. Try to simply notice them as indifferently as possible.

3) Set an intention

After you’ve checked in with yourself and evaluated your situation and surroundings, it’s time to set an intention. Here’s where you take some time to think about what you can do or an action you can take to improve what’s going on. Don’t spend time beating yourself up for what has already happened - look ahead to what can be done to make things right. Ask yourself:

What can I do now?

What can be done to improve my situation?

What is my next step?

Plan out what you can do in this moment that will benefit you. Imagine yourself completing the intention you set, and succeeding at it! Try not to set an intention that is unrealistic or unachievable. If you need to break your goal down into smaller steps, that’s okay too!

4) Take action

Finally, it’s time to perform the action you set as your intention. Whether that means apologizing to a coworker after an outburst, keeping your mind busy with a new hobby, breaking your project down into simple steps, making amends with a friend or headmate, or anything else, you have the power to take action when you set intentions! There is no need to rush to action - take your time, go slowly, and be mindful of yourself and your situation as you proceed.

And that’s all there is to it! Remember to use REST any time you feel overwhelmed by your emotions or situation. It’s okay to use REST multiple times a day! This can help you step back from difficult or scary situations, and help you feel more equipped to handle whatever may come your way.

Our system has written down the steps of REST with questions we can ask ourselves on a little note card that we keep in our wallet. Whenever one of us is starting to feel overwhelmed, we take out the card and try to practice REST-ing! It has helped us deal with stress at work, traumatic flashbacks, inner-system strife, and interpersonal conflicts. We hope that learning to REST can help you and your system as much as it’s helped us!

Thanks so much for reading! Remember to treat yourself and your system with kindness and compassion, and have a wonderful day!

(Image ID:) A pale orange userbox with a cluster of multicolored flowers for the userbox image. The border and text are both dark orange, and the text reads “all plurals can interact with this post!” (End ID.)

#coping skills #dbt #dbt skills #rest

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additiva · 4 months

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I don't know if you have already answered this, but Charles comments to Max in a chapter that he had been attracted to men, but he never took the step to have a sexual or sentimental relationship with them, so why did Charles decide to take that step with Max?, and also, what was the process Charles went through to realize that he was in love with Max?

By the way, I love your story and it is one of the updates I look forward to the most during the week and regarding the last chapter I hope my boys will soon be back to being happy and so beautifully in love.

Ok this is gonna be a long as fuck answer. This is surprisingly difficult to explain, even though I've just written 150k words on it.

This is, on some level, a brief explanation of the entire fic so far.

He was never strongly attracted to men before; he was sort of ambivalent about them. Like he could recognise that they were physically and mentally attractive (like Lewis), and in the particular case of Lewis, he was sort of intrigued by the idea of sex with him as a new and probably enjoyable experience. That's why he would've slept with Lewis IF Lewis had approached him. But he never had the actual pull toward them that would lead him to seek out a sexual or romantic interaction.

With Max, Charles sortof fell into it.

Essentially, his relationship with Max develops in a way he hasn't had with anyone before.

There was a really good recap from.. ferrariisbabygirl? on a chapter for this:

Charles: oh yeah, i never considered being with man before you because this is my first time meeting someone i feel is at my skill level and developing a homoerotic, at times one sided, psychological mind game filled rivalry with said person

Basically, his relationship from the beginning has been honest with Max in a way he's never had with anyone else.

From the start he singled Max out as the target of his worst traits. He pushed and manipulated him and did anything he could to destabilise him to allow himself to win the championship, and he didn't particularly care about the collateral effects on the rest of Max's life. He only cared about his one goal which was the championship. And for once, he didn't bother to hide what he was doing from Max, because it made Max even angrier to know that it was deliberate, which served Charles' purposes of throwing him off.

And Max, in response, fought back. Charles has never been treated that way by anyone; he's always been loved and adored, and maneuvered people to his will. No one's ever really fought back and imposed consequences on him. And he unexpectedly quite enjoyed that on some level. He's competitive about everything. So they both escalate and the tension eventually, unsurprisingly turns sexual (chapter 3 in the story but about a year and a bit after things started between them on track).

So basically, the relationship with Max is something completely new for Charles, even before they get together. There's an intensity and honesty to it. In some way all of the manipulation is honest, in the sense that Charles lets Max see it and let's him know that it's happening, to make him even angrier. So there's some release for Charles already in not having to hide this particular part of himself, even though he's hiding everything else from Max.

Then, he ends up in a series of situations where he's vulnerable to Max physically and emotionally (Zandvoort, Singapore and Qatar X 2) and Max reacts in a way that opens up another facet of the relationship, and suddenly their relationship has some other basis than antagonism; there some emotional care and trust there that wasn't there before.

Zandvoort and Singapore are probably the first time Charles has really let control be taken out of his hands(sexually or otherwise), and he's surprised to find that he enjoys it. Max handles him in a way that let's him shut off his brain and just feel, for once. There's a sort of quiet to it that's addictive, like finally getting to rest after running a marathon (and this is Charles' ultimate experience of their entire relationship now; it's a safe place for him, where he can finally let himself be cared for).

Then in Qatar, Max helps him after the race, when he's again unwillingly vulnerable. He hid his state from his team because he didn't want anyone to know how much he was struggling, but Max obviously seeks him out to help him, and later tries to keep helping him at the gala (before the sponsor thing). Charles is exhausted and unwell, and emotionally quite affected by this, and it freaks him out a bit so he tries to distance himself, but already there's a level of trust developing, such that when he's in trouble, Max is the one he calls. Because he knows Max will help him. And Max does. And again, Charles is AFFECTED by this.

So Charles is actually alarmed by it all at this point and feeling quite out of control, so he avoids Max, to try to focus on the championship. But ultimately it doesn't work and he gets upset at the end of the season about the idea of losing BOTH the championship and Max, these connected things that have both become a large part of his life.

So then he decides fuck it, the pull is too strong, he wants to be with Max and they get together. And at this stage, they've developed somewhat of a friendship, they care about one another, and they're sexually very compatible.

Then there's a process of opening himself up to Max. Of them getting to know each other, and Max earning his trust. For Charles this is new and sort of terrifying because there's no one else who he lets see him this completely.

And Max is frequently terrified of scaring Charles off, but he's probably not giving Charles enough credit.

So Charles tells Max these things about his life and about himself, sort of as a test, but also because he wants Max to know him.

He gets addicted to the feeling of being known and understood by Max, and to the ease of being able to let go all of the threads he's normally holding (his facades and manipulations).

Max wants to know everything about Charles, and learn everything about him (throwback to his musings about the way he feels at one with the car on the perfect quali lap, and how he's made it his life's work to pursue it). And Max rewards Charles for trusting him by anticipating, validating and fulfilling his needs (emotionally and otherwise).

And through this, Charles gets to know Max more, and basically falls in love with his personality as well as loving how he treats him.

But the central theme of it for Charles is that he gets to be himself with Max in a way he hasn't, basically since he was a child (since he started manipulating people full time in pursuit of his career). Even his family, he hides most things from bc he doesn't want them to worry and try to protect him and interfere with his goals.

So finally with Max, he has this experience of just existing comfortably in life, of feeling things and doing what he wants and saying what he thinks and being himself, and Max loves it is entertained by it, and works with it. And Max creates a safe space for him to exist and be himself in, because he doesn't expect Charles to be the person he's pretended to be for such a long time. He expects Charles to be a feral lunatic, but that's his feral lunatic, and he loves him.

For Charles, it's his every day experience of being with Max that makes him realise he loves him. How he always wants to be near him, how he feels like he can breathe easier, and exist easier when he's near him, or even just knowing that he has him. Max challenges him and indulges him, and never makes him feel unsafe. Max doesn't ask him to sacrifice his goals or calm down on track; he understands Charles' hunger for a championship and his obsession with driving. He makes him feel more than anyone ever has, and helps him express his genuine desires and feelings. And, Max is trying to respect his decisions, and help him with the burdens of them, even though he doesn't always agree with them.

But Charles is also still trying to balance everything with his ultimate goal which is to win a championship, and everything with Ferrari, and the sponsors, has been in pursuit of that. His relationship with Max is the only thing that he does that's not to serve that goal. Which is great for him, but also a source of stress.

Let me know if that makes sense.

#frechheitfic #asks

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mymarifae · 1 year

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man i'm not exactly taiga's biggest fan rn either but if the only thing you took away from everything he said to the kiddos in lutf is "he's a shitty person and ruined their dreams" then... i think you missed the point? like it or not, this is a lesson vbs has needed to learn. they've needed to learn that they'll never produce anything better than rad weekend if they just keep trying to mimic it - because they'll never be in the same situation that produced the damn thing in the first place. not only are none of them dying from cancer, they're all very very very close friends which sets them apart from RADder in a BIG way. how many times has ken said that he and taiga weren't exactly buddy-buddy in their RADder days? part of rad weekend's insane atmosphere can be contributed to the animosity and competitive spirit between them! not that vbs lacks competitive spirit, but it's all friendly. that's already going to create an entirely different atmosphere than rad weekend's and that's okay. that's good, actually

vbs has needed to learn that they NEED to carve out their own path. if they chased after rad weekend forever they'd just be setting themselves up for failure and disappointment. you can't live your life trying to live up to or do better than someone else. you will never be that person; you are only You. so no matter what you do, your work won't be "as good" as theirs. it'll just look like a poor imitation.

ken and taiga have been trying to get this lesson through vbs' thick skulls for like 900 events. and now it's finally stuck. could it have been handled more tactfully and with less emotional trauma? absolutely. what taiga ended up doing was way way way way way over the line but you know what. whatever. it doesn't matter because in the end this is an extremely important step forward for vbs. now they can set out on a new path, one that's entirely their own. and one day they're going to put on a show that's so damn good that no one will even think to compare it to rad weekend because they blew it out of the water completely.

#my prediction for vbs's Ultimate show is l/n and wxs and mmj and n25 will all perform in it #like. especially now that arata and kotaro and ever have quit.....#just. trust me. they're going to start branching out into performing with the rest of the main cast #probably.#anyway lutf is heartbreaking but this is very much something that needed to happen #vbs got cocky. and complacent. i don't agree with the harshness of taiga's wake up call but they needed one #they were this 🤏🏾 close to trapping themselves in a loop of perpetual disappointment and failure

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tenebraevesper · 2 years

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Sonic the Hedgehog Analyzer, Sonic the Hedgehog Annual 2022

So, after what happened in The Battle for the Empire Arc, I think we all need to catch our breath and recharge before we can move on to The Overpowered Arc. Therefore, it’s time for some dumb fun, featuring the return of many familiar characters, their interactions and emotional moments.

Story #1: Guardians

Our first story follows Blaze, whom we haven’t seen since an amnesiac Sonic landed in the Sol Dimension. She is currently on a mission, fighting off pirates and destroying their ship.

As Blaze burns everything in her path, she grabs a robot’s head, demanding he tell her where the leader of the robot pirates is hiding. The head replies that there aren’t any, and that they’re all what’s left. Blaze doesn’t believe him, but the robot adds how they’re all gone, and that she won.

Blaze is shocked, having not expected that she’d manage to completely eliminate any threats in her world. She’s then called over by Marine the Raccoon (nice to see you again, Marine!), who asks her if she needs any help while everything around Blaze is burning down.

As they sail back home, Marine wonders what Blaze is so upset about, as they had been hunting pirates forever and they can finally have a vacation. Blaze replies how they have to be vigilant, but Marine insists that they had won and that Blaze has earned time off.

However, Blaze still feels bound by her duties as the Princess of the Sol Dimension and the Guardian of the Sol Emeralds. Marine replies that this doesn’t mean that she cannot relax, and if she cannot convince Blaze, then who can?

This is immediately answered by a cut to Knuckles, who is stunned to see Blaze appearing on Angel Island. Honestly, I think that it is amazing and heartwarming that Blaze decided to go to Knuckles for counsel, as she knows he’s stuck in a similar position as her as the Guardian of the Master Emerald.

Knuckles wonders why she’s here, and Blaze admits that, while they’re not well acquainted and she doesn’t want to place burdens at someone else’s feet, Sonic has taught her to seek help from others, so she was hoping to get his opinion, one Guardian to another. Knuckles is surprised, but tells her to walk with him.

As they walk through Lava Reef, Blaze asks Knuckles if it is ever acceptable to step away from his duties as the Guardian. Knuckles, in turn, asks her that, as the Princess, she too has her own duties, with Blaze explaining how her ministers handle the paperwork and she just reviews it, as her empire is peaceful and prosperous. She used her spare time to hunt down pirates, but now they’re all gone, and she knows she should be happy that everything’s at peace. As for the Sol Emeralds, they’re secure and under constant watch, and she can even get better security if necessary.

Knuckles comments how she has all that, and she still cannot step away from her duty because she wants to be there to fix things in case something goes wrong, with Blaze being happy that he understands her. But to her confusion, Knuckles tells her that she should take a vacation.

He explains how he cannot leave Angel Island since he cannot hide the Master Emerald somewhere more secure and that he’s on his own here, unless he needs to leave for the greater good, always taking a gamble. But Blaze’s situation? It’s a gift, and she shouldn’t waste it.

Admittedly, while Knuckles is on his own as a guardian, we know that he can always call on Sonic, Tails, and the rest of his friends in case he needs help, but at the same time, this would be his last resort, as he wouldn’t want to burden them with his own problems.

Blaze admits that it was nice being around everyone else, referring to the time she helped them against Neo Metal Sonic, and thanks Knuckles for the insight, as it means a great deal to her, while Knuckles is happy to talk to someone who understands responsibility.

Blaze then notes how she could repay him for his kindness by taking over his Guardian duties and allow him some time off (yeah, she’s definitely a workaholic), but Knuckles replies how she isn’t getting a working vacation and how he isn’t going to put her through that trouble. Blaze is fine with that answer, vanishing in a pillar of fire as she has preparations to make. Honestly, this was such a sweet moment between the two and I live for stuff like this.

Back at Blaze’s world, she brings along with Marine and her guards the Sol Emeralds to Coral Cave Island, where the Jeweled Scepter is. The guard has been tripled and Marine will be the one in charge. Speaking of Marine, she actually gets a tearful.

Marine tells Blaze just how happy she is that Blaze is taking care of herself, but that she is also going to miss her and hugs her and d’aaaaaaaawww, just look at these two, this is so adorable! And Blaze even hugs her back, saying how it’s not too late to change her mind, but Marine tells her that she deserves the vacation and that she can leave everything to her. If there’s trouble, she’ll call Blaze back, but she should leave.

Blaze then casually walks out of a pillar of fire at Sonic’s world, with the most hilarious smile on her expression, taking in that she’s now on vacation. Sonic, Amy, Cream and Cheese are having a tea party, with Amy recounting what happened in Trial by Fire (meaning this takes place shortly before the whole battle at Eggperial City), and the three are happy to see Blaze again, with Cream hugging her and Sonic noting that her visit is a reason to celebrate.

Remember how Sonic asked her to come visit sometime when she’s not on duty? Yeah, now, Blaze can finally fulfill that promise.

Story #2: Weapons

Our next story takes place place sometime after Chao Races and Badnik Bases, with Tails and Belle having managed to fix Omega and Gemerl. Omega is happy that he’s fixed and ready to cause more carnage, thanking Tails for the hard work, suggesting he and Gemerl go for a test-drive by having a sparring match outside the workshop. Omega and Gemerl agree, with Omega noting how he cannot guarantee Gemerl’s welfare, while Gemerl replies how he’ll teach him a lesson.

Predictably, the two go all out on each other, Gemerl firing missiles at Omega, and Omega rushing towards Gemerl, boasting how Gemerl isn’t a match for him.

Omega notes how, according to the data files, Gemerl once fought Sonic to a stand-still while serving as Eggman’s enforcer, yet he’s now put on the defensive. Omega proceeds to tell Gemerl that him caring for Cream, Cheese, Vanilla and Chocola made him weak and that he lost his edge, beating him up and offering him to join in his destruction of Eggman’s forces and abandon Cream and her family.

Gemerl is pissed off.

He rejects Omega’s proposal, knocking him down, and replies how, while they are similar, Omega was built to destroy, while he was built to evolve. His function has changed and now he protects Cream, Cheese, Vanilla and Chocola rather than operate on the battlefield. Badass!

The two stare at each other for a moment, then charge once again at each other for another round.

The results of their battle are seen later, as they return to an exasperated Tails and Belle, both beaten up and missing pieces, requesting to be fixed... again! Tails is annoyed, saying how he sent them to spar, not have a no-holds-barred grudge match, but Omega replies how he warned him that welfare wasn’t a guarantee. Yeah, that was on you Tails.

Nevertheless, we see that Omega has newfound respect for Gemerl, and Gemerl has newfound respect for Omega, with the two fist-bumping each other. Honestly, I love these two.

Story #3: Hero Camp

The next story focuses on Cream, as she and some other kids enroll in Hero Camp, wanting to learn how to become a real hero. However, when we see the camp, it is more of a rundown shack.

We also see Orbot and Cubot... and that explains why the place looks like this, as they’re running it. The two had decided to gather information on the Restoration from the kids, hoping to deliver Sonic’s biggest secrets to Eggman. They put on their best Team Rocket disguise (seriously, how the hell doesn’t Cream recognize the two?), introducing themselves as Cubert and Orville, certified heroes (with “Orville” having certified them personally). One of the kids asks whether they know Sonic, with Orbot and Cubot quickly turning the question around to test them on their knowledge about being heroes.

For their first test, they’re all tied up, with Orbot and Cubot saying how they should figure out how to untie themselves. Cream does it by cutting the ropes, explaining how Sonic taught her that, much to Orbot and Cubot’s chagrin.

The kids are next tested on building a hideout similar to the Restoration, with Cream not really looking happy about it. Orbot asks her, as “the member of Sonic’s inner circle” what she thinks about it, with Cream replying how it’s missing a few things. Orbot and Cubot wonder if she meant the security systems, but Cream replies how she was referring to the mall and playing area. As she grows suspicious, Orbot and Cubot promptly pull a plug to this test, destroying the “hideout”.

For the last part, neither Orbot nor Cubot are sure what to do, with Cubot suggesting a telling a scary story around a campfire to scare a hero, but both are hilariously bad at it. One kid suggest they could toast s’mores, only for the two to be confused by what s’mores are... and that’s what ticks Cream off, making her realize they’re not camp counselors and leading charge against the two. Honestly, this is pure hilarity and I love it. No clue when the story takes place, though, but I think it would be hilarious if it takes place after Test Run and this was part of the “reconnaissance” Orbot told Eggman about while they were actually taking a vacation.

The next day, Vanilla picks Cream up, asking her if she had a good time and learned how to be a hero, with Cream sheepishly replying how the main thing she had learned was that they maybe already are the real heroes. We then pan to a tied up Orbot and Cubot, who are so proud that they taught the kids well.

Story #4: Future Growth

The next story focuses on Silver, who has returned to the past to help with the harvest in the garden he and Blaze had worked on (also, who the hell gave Charmy shears?!). Admittedly, Silver doesn’t appear to be as happy and carefree as his friends.

He’s suddenly startled by Sonic, squishing the tomato in his hand, who’s here to grab the basket with the tomatoes. Silver replies that he’s done, with Sonic quickly carrying his and Amy’s basket away. Amy approaches Silver, noting how she’s glad that he could return to the past and help them out, with Silver just laughing it off. Amy then turns to Tangle, who’s about to dig out the potatoes in her own fashion, panicking. Silver, on the other hand, is upset, something that is noticed by Espio.

Silver leaves the group, looking really troubled (and I’m getting this “if anyone hurts Silver, I would first kill everyone else in the room, then myself” feeling), only to be startled by Espio, who has followed him.

Silver tries to assure him that he’s fine, just on an important mission for the future and... yeah, Espio doesn’t buy it, pointing out that Silver is bad at lying. Silver relents, knowing that, and Espio wonders if he’s concealing some kind of danger. Silver replies how it’s not that, and that he actually isn’t here for the harvest. As a matter of fact, he has no clue why he’s here at all.

Usually, he knows why he’s sent to the past, as he would be sent to save the future from turning up wrecked. This is his purpose and he always knew what to do to change history. But this time, he has no idea what he’s supposed to do. There is no crisis in the future and everything’s fine, but... he’s not.

First of all, someone please give Silver a hug! Second, this is the same situation as with Blaze - Silver just cannot fathom to be sent to the past for no reason (and speaking of which, I don’t think we ever learn how he travels to the past or who sends him there).

Silver starts hyperventilating, wondering if he did something wrong, or if he missed something, fearing that there’s some kind of disaster looming over them, but Espio tells him to take a deep breath and calm down first.

He then proceeds to explain how, as a ninja, his priority is the success of the mission, but as a friend, it is the safety of his team. Danger could be waiting everywhere and if he allows it, the fear would consume him. He points a kunai at his chest, noting how he would have lost without his enemies even lifting a finger. Silver then wonders how he deals with that fear.

Espio explains how he just needs to have faith in himself and his friends. Silver may not know why he’s here, but that doesn’t matter, as he is where he needs to be. If there’s trouble, everyone has Silver’s back, and he should go back to the garden and enjoy himself. After all, he deserves it.

Honestly, this is so adorable and heartwarming and I absolutely love it! Again, Sonic had also asked Silver to join them when the world isn’t in danger, and Silver is finally in a situation where he literally doesn’t have to worry about the future and can just hang out with his friends.

Silver agrees that Espio is right, and while he is scared, he can count on his friends, proceeding to hug a stunned Espio and thank him for the counsel. They then overheard Charmy causing trouble (presumably along with Tangle) and Silver offers Espio help, with the exasperated Espio agreeing.

Story #5: Another Grand Adventure for Jet the Hawk

Our next story focuses on Jet and Whisper, and we know this one takes place before Trial by Fire, as Whisper has been sent on a mission by Jewel. Before we get to that, we observe Jet in his room on the blimp, preparing a calzone and reading a birthday card sent from his father. Honestly, I love all the little details in his room, but the most hilarious bit is the photo of him and Sonic, which Jet as torn in half.

Jet hears the microwave being done, only to be shocked when he sees a Wisp carrying the calzone, yelling after it as it flies away to Whisper, who is currently on the above-mentioned mission. Whisper is really happy about her lunch.

Apparently, her mission is to take out a huge Badnik, but she’s interrupted by a furious Jet, who notes how she stole from him and that she will make it up to him. Yeah, I’m with Jet here, I’d also be hangry if someone stole my food.

Whisper is genuinely confused, guessing that she will, while Jet goes on a rant how she should think about the time he wasted chasing his lunch around when he could’ve stolen more gems (you’re not helping your case here, Jet!), so now she owes him gems and a calzone. The Wisp brings him a banana over, but Jet tells him how he doesn’t want that. Whisper tells him to be quiet, trying to warn him about the Badnik, but Jet yells how he cannot her hear whispering over the rumbling of his stomach... and gets promptly grabbed by the robot.

Jet yells at the Badnik to let him down, then tells Whisper to grab his Extreme Gear to help him. Whisper struggles with it, obviously not being used to riding it, while Jet yells at her to be more like him and she’ll be fine. He then continues ranting how he personally doesn’t have a clue how hard it is to use as he’s born gifted and that a wise old man (literally his father) told him “With skill and confidence, you are as fierce as the wind”, while Whisper tells him to stop talking as she gets the hang of the airboard.

When Jet doesn’t, she yells at him to be quiet as she snipes the Badnik, who falls over into a net, disabled. Jet is genuinely impressed by her skills, asking her to join the Babylon Rogues, but Whisper refuses, leaving. The Wisp then happily returns the half-eaten calzone to Jet, who tells them that they still owe him a fresh one.

Honestly, this one was pure hilarity and I just love Jet and Whisper’s interactions.

Story #6: Rough Patch

The last story focuses on Rough and Tumble, as well as Tangle and Rouge, and I have no clue when this takes place. I assume it is after Bad Guys, at the earliest and Hit The Pavement at the latest.

So, Rough and Tumble are having an argument at their hideout (which sticks out like a sore thumb) over their rhymes, with Tumble bringing up how they need to get it right since Sonic laughed at them the last time they met. Rough notes how Sonic laughs at everything and wants to move on with their plan, but Tumble insists they work on their intro. When Rough refuses, Tumble refuses to listen to his dumb plans and the two split up, going their separate ways. Not gonna lie, I’m hella invested in their relationship drama.

We then cut to Jewel’s museum, and apparently, she has found one of the Chaos Emeralds, deciding to display it (last time we saw them was when Sonic and SIlver went Super to fight Kaiju!Zavok). Rough and Tumble climb inside, starting their usual rhyme shtick...

...only to be shocked by the team-up of Rouge & Tumble and Rough & Tangle. The two yell at each other, wondering what they are doing here. Tangle tells Rough that he told her that those “ruffians” would come to steal the Chaos Emerald and that they wanted to take it to protect it. Meanwhile, Rouge notes to Tumble how they must’ve followed them here to stop them from taking the Chaos Emerald.

Rough and Tumble fall for the lie hook, line and sinker, starting to beat each other up, while Rouge and Tangle observe the show. Both note how they’re here undercover to keep an eye on the skunk brothers, with Rouge explaining how she was in the neighborhood for... reasons (you’re not fooling anyone, Rouge) and that Tumble waved her over and explained her plan to take the Chaos Emerald. As for Tangle, Rough pretended he was a vigilante hero now and wanted to protect the Chaos Emerald, begging Tangle to help him as he needed someone to order around.

Rouge comments on her breaking into her friend’s museum, but Tangle notes how it is a regular occurrence. Rouge then notes how they should bring this to a close, already having a plan, with Tangle being happy that they’re undercover buddies.

Meanwhile, Rough and Tumble question each others motives for teaming up with Tangle and Rouge, only to realize that they had the same plan and... d’aaaaaw, look at their eyes! Look at them reconciling! This is so sweet!

The two then get up, turning to Rouge and Tangle, ready to deal with the two only to be stunned when they see their ex-partners teaming up.

“You played me for a stooge...”

“So now you’re gonna get mangled!”

“Your master plan is about to be stopped by...”

“ROUGE AND TANGLE!”

Tangle then punches the two, with Rough wondering why everyone keeps stealing their shtick (maybe because it’s fun) and Tangle wraps them up, telling Rouge how the Chaos Emerald is safe... only to realize a moment later that Rouge stole it (she really can’t stop herself, can she?). As Rouge leaves, Tangle tears up, feeling betrayed, and just look at those big eyes!

“But... undercover buddies...”

My God, this is both hilarious and heartbreaking, and then hilarious once again, all at the same time. I swear, Tangle gets the best expressions in this comic. We also now know that at least one Chaos Emerald is with Rouge.

As for Rough and Tumble, they agree to only team up with each other, fist-bumping.

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sandersgrey · 2 years

Text

A Study in Greys

Eventual Kit/Ty Endgame, Mutual Pining, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Psychological Trauma, Kit Rook Has ADHD, Kit Rook has C-PTSD.

First / Second / Third / Fourth / Fifth / Prev. Fic also available on ao3.

Wordcount: 6k.

A/N: Huge thanks to everyone who commented and gave me the motivation to finally finish the chapter. As always, shout out to @thechangeling for being a very supportive friend and not killing me for the hiatus, and @jynxlovesluck for being the amazing partner and beta they've been this entire time. I could not do it without you. At the very least, I could not do it this well. TW for a bit of unconscious self harm right at the beginning, and for a lot of conflict between characters, including brief fear of domestic violence that doesn't come to pass. (Not a lot of physical injuries, though. Not... yet.)

Seventh Chapter: The Ghost At The Feast

“Absolutely fucking not.”

With her arms crossed and that snarl, Livy would be any horror director’s first pick. Ty could feature in it, too; he’s pretty enough to be the star cast in marble in the dusty light of the room, his silence heavy. He hasn’t spoken in five minutes.

Kit would have liked to say he’s been handling this tension with all the poise and resilience of a Herondale. It’s true if you know a Herondale’s bad habits. He’s bit down so hard on the inside of his cheek that the thin rope of badly-healed skin split open again, coating his tongue with a taste of iron.

He’s never been good at arguing with people he actually likes. It’s his biggest flaw.

Still. No better time to learn than the present. Draping a shaky arm over his knee, Kit risks a grin: “Are you sure?”

Livvy’s stare grows unimpressed:

“We’re not using you as bait.”

“Why not?” Kit asks. “I’d be really good at it.”

Ty’s frown deepens. He’s been incessantly tapping the ground since the idea first came up, faster the longer it went on. It’s honestly a little insulting. Kit might not be the best with a dagger, but he can figure out a social situation better than anyone in this room, alive or dead, that’s for sure. He resents the worry.

“No,” says Ty.

Livvy emphatically gestures at him. “Yes, thank you, Ty. It’s a terrible idea.”

“Eh, is it?”

“Kit, we’re not risking you getting hurt.” she sighs.

That gets a snort out of him. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m already at risk. I’ve been at risk since the beginning. The safest option- for everyone- is to shut down their entire operation as soon as we possibly can, or did you forget about their whole Puppet King idea?”

“That doesn’t mean we should put you at more risk!” Ty blurts out.

“I think that’s really up to me, isn’t it? We’re-” - sitting on top of a time bomb, waiting for it to explode- “ risking more the more we wait. Someone might figure out we know; I’d be really fucking surprised if they don’t already suspect you, and I’d really rather not figure out how subtler the next assassination attempt is gonna be, okay?”

Ty presses his thumb against the center of his palm, massaging the muscle. Stress tightens his shoulders into boulders- it makes Kit feel a little bad, honestly. He doesn’t mean this to be anxiety inducing to anyone else.

Rolling his tongue against the open wound in his mouth, Kit waits.

The mortar between the stones, at least, is easy pickings for a clever enough hand. He digs his nails into it and wonders how long it’d take to bring the whole castle down in itself. Longer than he has. He picks at it anyway.

“It’s too big a risk,” Ty says at last. “I won’t be able to get to you fast enough if you’re caught.”

Shaking his head impatiently, Kit says:

“Look, I can do it, alright? It’s like ten, fifteen minutes, tops, and then we’re home free. I know I fumbled it- I know I should’ve realized what they wanted sooner, but I’m not completely incompetent. I can handle some manipulative idiots.”

A tilted head. Confusion briefly crosses Ty’s expression, resolving itself into something unreadable. His clever fingers grip the hem of Kit’s jeans until the fabric stretches, near painfully, over his bruised knee. Kit doesn’t flinch. He can’t.

“It’s not about whether you could do it. You shouldn’t have to.”

Kit shrugs. “I shouldn’t have to do a lot of things.”

“What does that mean?”

Right. He sighs, more disappointed in himself than on anyone else, and pinches the bridge of his nose between his pointer and thumb. No more cryptic bullshit: Ty doesn’t play mind games.

But, as he opens his mouth… Kit finds himself stuck. He pauses, wondering, and closes it back again. What does that mean? Does it mean anything?

For some reason, what comes to mind is this: his ten years old self, the Market, and a pocketful of stolen wallets. Then: his fifteen years old self, the Market, and a pocketful of strange ingredients. The way he had felt stuck back then, too. The way he’d felt useful.

Ty’s attention tastes like iron. It feels like it, too.

“I just want-” Kit swallows. His exhale cracks, brittle. “I don’t know. I guess I can’t go home.”

He picks at a loose thread in his jeans, wrapping it around his finger until it turns his skin swollen, a purple protest. Lets go. Once, twice, a third time, relieving the pressure just before it bursts. Ty says:

“You could go.”

It hits like a wave of nausea. Kit squeezes his eyes shut, dizzy with it.

A familiar tempo, discarded like a dirty coat on the ground. There’s nothing to say. The thread digs into his knuckles, a bright spot of pain in the darkness, and Kit holds onto it.

“What we mean ,’ says Livvy, in a meaningful tone of voice, “is that it’s a really fucked up situation that you don’t need to stay in. We’re not saying we don’t want you around.”

“Of course we’re not,” Ty says, a little perplexed. His elegant fingers twitch towards Kit’s own.

Kit can’t help it: he laughs. God. How like Ty to utterly destroy him without even meaning to. Dragging a hand over his face, he presses the palm against the orbit of his skull until he could map the bones by feel alone and asks, tired:

“What even for?”

It’s nearly comforting how baffled Ty’s “What for?” sounds, like he can’t even figure out why they’d need a reason at all. Ty pauses, his grip on Kit’s jeans tightening. “Just because, I guess.”

Just because.

It’s not anything. It’s just a sentence. Kit lets his hand fall on his lap, exhausted, the strength of Ty’s earnest expression a little too heavy to bear. It’s no good. Kit can’t deal with that right now.

“I-”

His phone rings.

The sudden trrrrrrrr makes Ty wince back, his entire face scrunching up in pain.

Scrambling, Kit paws at his pocket, frantically mumbling sorry sorry sorry until sweat-slicked fingers manage to get a grip, pressing against the screen harder than they usually need to. He hangs up.

Ty rubs a thumb against the palm of his other hand, self-soothing. “Who was that?”

“It says Nessie”, Livvy observes from over Kit’s shoulders. He sighs, mourns his privacy, explains:

“A friend from Devon.”

“You’re not going to call back?”

A grimace. Kit gently kicks at Ty’s thigh until he gets the memo and lets his foot go. Pulling his knees up, Kit rests his chin in his arms, just a little bit colder, and says:

“Nah, all my friends at home are mad at me. I’m going to wait til the dust settles.”

Ty frowns, the perfect line of his jaw tightening, but Livvy tilts her head and a few of her hair strands no-clip into the wall. It never looks quite right. Kit holds back a shudder.

She asks:

“Why are they mad at you?”

He sucks air in through his teeth. “Well, Lizzie and Mari are mad because I left with Zach, which makes sense. He was a dick to them. Nessie is mad, because…” Wincing, Kit raises a shoulder in a how to put this? way. “Well, because I’m here.”

Ty shifts his weight to lean closer, staring down at the thread around Kit’s finger until Kit lets go of it, shame-faced. “What do you mean?”

The awkward position strains at the seams of Ty’s right sleeve, the sculpted, lean shape of his arm tensing to keep him upright. There’s deceptive strength there. It had felt like a steel bar across Kit’s chest when Ty had caught him.

Someone pointedly clears their throat:

“Could it be,” entones Livvy, “because you left? Did you even tell her you were coming here?”

The tiniest flicker of a flinch in Ty’s hand. Kit tightens the reins on his own gaze, tips his chin up at Livvy, half-lidded and scornful:

“How would you want me to explain this to her? Sorry, I can’t hang out this week, I’m too busy scheming? Would you mind putting our plans on hold while I uncover a conspiracy I can’t tell you about?”

“If that's the truth,” says Ty. Kit scoffs:

“She would’ve wanted to come.”

“Then let her.”

“Yeah, that sounds like such a great idea,” Kit sneers, then pauses, chagrined. Adds: “That’s sarcasm. Nessie is a vampire. Letting her come would probably be the most efficient way to get her fucking killed. It’s too dangerous. No , thank you.”

Ty says, aggrieved:

“Then tell her that.”

“Yeah? Have you told Alyssa?”

A pause. “How do you know about her?”

Kit looks away, dragging his feet across the floor. He hadn’t meant to say that.

(Dust rises through Livvy’s form. She shakes herself off, impatient, and floats a little away when that previsibly fails to do anything. Like this, they can barely see her.)

“You’re not hiding it as well as you think you are,” he says. “Not everyone thinks you’ve cut off all contact.”

“Ragnor wouldn’t tell.”

“You’re right, he wouldn't. He didn’t need to, anyway. Harry noticed you’ve been sneaking off.”

“Like you do? You haven’t been all that careful either,” Livvy points out.

Shrugging, Kit leans back against the wall as casually as possible. He tips his chin up, allows a leg to extend, and keeps a very tight lid on his voice as he says:

“Sure. The difference is that people suspect Ty’s ‘consorting with the enemy’ because he’s openly done it before,” like an idiot, Kit doesn’t say. “They think I’m having an affair because that’s the fun and exciting thing to believe.”

Ty pauses. “They think you-”

“There’s no proof, obviously, but that doesn’t matter. It makes sense. You should’ve given them a hint of a scandal, Ty… It would’ve worked better than silence.”

Shoving the (quite helpful, honestly) suggestion away with a gesture, Ty frowns:

“They think you’re having an affair… with me ?”

Livvy turns to the wall, concealing her laugh with a cough. Briefly, but fervidly, Kit wishes for the ability to banish a spirit.

“Sorry”, Kit says. “I know I’m not your type, but I figured it’d be safer than them realizing we’re colluding. It gets the message across now that they know they can’t just kill you off openly. Heather had a moment-”

“The poltergeist.”

Kit nods. “I know you noticed. Me insisting on going with you is what sealed it, I think. Now she’s at least going to be a little subtler about it- make sure it can’t be tracked back to her.” A pause, then: “You should be careful.”

“You should have told me.”

“I knew you already knew you were in danger, Ty.”

Ty drags himself into an upright position, jaw tight with the kind of defensiveness Kit usually saw in him around Julian. His dark brows are furrowed. They cast a shadow upon his eyes.

“I didn’t know about this ,” Ty snaps. “I’m glad you trust my intelligence, but I can’t just guess what you want, Kit. I can’t just know what you’re thinking. You need to tell me things.”

He bristles. “You didn't tell me anything until last night either!”

“I didn’t know you wanted to hear it.”

“Of course I do!”

“Kit”, Ty says, “I didn’t know. Of course I didn't tell you. The last time we’d seen each other you said you didn’t know when you’d forgive me, and then you show up here, years later, dating one of the people who are trying to kill me. I knew you were after something, but fuck if I knew exactly what-”

“I had to do that! I had to date him, how the fuck else was I gonna get here-”

He bites down, but it’s too late.

Dread filling his chest cavity with something far too cold and heavy to name, he watches, scared even to blink, as the blood drains from Ty’s face. There is something devastating about the delicate pink of Ty’s mouth trembling, the dark brows creasing his marble-perfect skin into the kind of expression that would send Kit to his knees if he could move at all.

Kit watches, and fears, and regrets only that he misspoke.

Slowly, Ty says: “You’re using him.”

The tone is very nearly casual. It’s the phrasing that sends a jolt of ice into his stomach. Kit lowers his head, sinking his teeth hard onto the inside of his cheek, and waits.

“That’s why it didn’t fit. That’s why you felt so off around him. You knew he was a centurion; you knew he could bring you here, so you… instead of doing anything else, you…”

“He was insulting my friends in a downworlder restaurant. He wanted a fight.” The voice out of his mouth is nearly unrecognizable. “Ty, he was a threat. I was unarmed.”

“And now?”

Hands into fists. Sharp nails.

“He’s still a threat. This is my best weapon.”

“So you lied to him.”

Kit raises his head, heated. “We just found out that they sent him as bait on purpose, so what does it matter? That’s what I was meant to do!”

“You didn’t know that back then!”

“I knew he was a racist piece of shit who would love a chance to kill all my friends,” he says. “I knew things were going wrong here and I knew that you’d know that, but- I couldn’t just stand there! I couldn’t just hope you’d be fine!”

That pale throat moves as Ty swallows, his face a blank canvas- Kit could project anything on it, anything and nothing at all. His mouth moves:

“You said you didn’t forgive me.”

“I don’t.”

“ When,” bites out Ty, “will you start making any fucking sense?”

Kit throws up his hands, careless of the dust:

“Well, fuck me, Ty, I don’t know what you want me to say!”

“Why are you here?” Ty immediately lists. “Why would you put yourself through all that trouble for someone you’ve said you don’t forgive? Why would you send the necklace? Why would you send the book ?”

Bashful, Kit says: “So you know about the book.”

“Of course I know about the book. There aren’t that many people who would anonymously send me a special edition of Sherlock Holmes. It was either you or Ragnor Fell.”

“Ragnor doesn’t do presents.”

“Yes. I know.”

Kit runs a hand through his hair, tugging just enough to feel it under his skin. “I don’t forgive you,” he says. “Fuck. That doesn’t mean I don’t…”

“You don’t?”

A strangled, frustrated noise, deep in Kit’s throat:

“Don’t make me say it.”

“Say what?”

“Oh, you never forget anything”, says Kit, bitterly. “I’m sure you’ll figure it out if you dig hard enough. It was a big day for you.”

From behind the dust, Livvy says: “Don’t talk in riddles.”

His amygdala screams. Feeling a little like he’s buzzing, Kit cradles the elbow he’d thrown against the wall and considers, not for the first time, the very few weapons the living have against the dead.

“ Fuck, Livvy, you scared me!”

“Boo”, she says flatly. “Shouldn’t have forgotten I’m here.”

“ Say something next time, Jesus-”

“I did-”

Movement in his periphery startles Kit back into his guard. Ty has taken a step forward, his delicate fingers hovering over Kit’s hold- too afraid to touch and overstep? The darkness of his brows have furrowed further, worried:

“You’re hurt.”

Kit shakes his head, softening. “It’s fine. I was just startled.”

Finally resolving himself, Ty lays a gentle hand on top of Kit’s. His skin is dry and bitingly cold, the tips of his fingers and parts of his palms hard with calluses, his grip loving. Kit clenches down on the shudder before it starts.

“If you weren’t fine,” says Ty slowly, “would you tell me?”

No. Kit wants to lean back against the wall, wrestle himself back into the shape of someone who doesn’t care about it, but he can’t risk Ty moving away. He stands still. “Does it matter?”

“ Yes.”

“I came here because you were in trouble,” Kit says, because that , at least, is easy. “I sent you the book because I thought you might like it.”

Something about Ty’s mouth softens. “I do.”

“Good.”

“I still don’t get it, though.”

He shakes his head:

“I can’t explain.” Please. “Don’t make me.”

Ty’s hold on his arm tightens, sinking nearly deep enough into his flesh to be satisfying, before Ty lets go. “Fine,” he bites out. It doesn’t feel good.

Hardly anything does, these days.

“I have to go back before anyone gets suspicious. We should put the plan in motion tonight- it’ll only get harder the longer we wait, alright?”

Alarm and frustration rise with Ty’s head: “Kit, no- you should at least have a weapon-”

“I’ll come with you,” Livvy interrupts. Both boys stop in their tracks. “It’s been a while”, she explains, confronted with Ty’s surprise. “Promise I won’t read over your shoulder, Kit.”

It’s a lie.

Kit lets her tag along anyway.

It’s not so bad at first. Livvy hums, some unfamiliar melody that echoes strangely in the stone corridors. Sound carries. Kit can imagine the notes floating down, down, down into the lived spaces where the enemy lies. He nearly tells her to be quieter before he remembers. If no one else can hear it, does it even make a sound?

Her white dress flutters to a wind that isn't there. Her hair is as still as the grave, irradiating a cold spot big enough to envelop Kit in its gelid embrace.

It’s never good to spend too much time around ghosts. You’ll forget how to be warm.

Her legs curl under her as Livvy leans forward, unbothered by gravity:

“He’s right, you know. You really should have something to fight with if you’re going through this.”

Didn’t help you, he doesn’t say. “I guess.”

Kit’s never liked swords much. They always make him feel like he’s pretending to be the storybook hero he just isn’t, but, besides the gun, they’re still what he’s best with. Getting close enough to use a dagger isn’t exactly his favored position.

And things are not nearly bad enough for the gun. He hopes, at least.

He’ll just stand behind Zach around his little posse. Idiot or not, he could make a good body shield. The shame churning inside his stomach isn’t relevant.

Livvy hums. “I’ve been thinking a lot about when we met.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. It’s been three years…” and I haven’t changed since, her frown says. She catches him looking. “Kind of weird to be nostalgic for that, right? Everything was so awful.”

“I get nostalgic about that, too. Sometimes. I think it’s just human nature.”

That makes her smile. It’s a thin one, nearly invisible against the backdrop of the stone wall. “Back then,” she says, “did you already know?”

Kit sighs, resigned.

“Know what?”

“That you’re in love with my brother.”

This time, he manages to avoid his elbow making contact with the wall- Kit still curses, unnerved, and turns to her with about the same urgency of a spy who just heard his co-conspirator sneeze mid-infiltration:

“Don’t say that!”

Livvy straightens herself up, unimpressed: “If I can’t say it and you won’t, what’s the plan there? Morse code?”

“I’m not saying shit, and you better not fucking tattle.”

“Yeah, I got that . That’s why I’m asking about the plan,” she drawls. “I don’t think you’re the type to keep Zach as your pet centurion after this is over, but then again, I didn’t think you’d do it at all. Where did you learn how to honeypot?”

Sighing, he gently butts his head against the closest wall. Wishes for brain damage. Then starts walking again:

“I’m a good improviser.”

“I guess,” says Livvy, doubtful.

“And there’s no plan,” he adds. “ I’m going to get this over with, make sure Ty’s okay, and- I don’t know, go home, probably, if my friends aren’t waiting outside with torches and pitchforks… Livvy?”

She’s only a step or two behind him. Her expression is dark.

“So you’re leaving him again.”

“It’s not leaving him”, Kit scoffs. “What, did you want me to move in permanently? I should be going home soon anyway . Didn’t you guys just say I could go?”

“That’s different.”

“ How?”

“You’re not leaving because it’s dangerous,” she accuses. “You’re leaving because you’re a coward. You’re too afraid to be around him.”

There is, he thinks, something deeply wrong with his heart. “ And ?”

“You can’t do that to Ty. Not again.”

Kit scoffs, and turns to keep walking.

Temperature shock stops him in his tracks as Livvy emerges from his body and plants herself in his way, a dangerous glint in her eyes . His body shakes. The hallway behind her nearly fades from view.

Silver-green eyes.

“Christopher, you’re my friend,” her voice is like velvet. “But if you break his heart again, I’m going to make your life a living hell.”

It gives him a second of pause. Mostly, to assess the damage. It’s not so bad- he’ll stop trembling, but his body doesn’t know it yet. That’s always the hardest part.

“I didn’t break his heart a first time,” he finally says. “It’s not like that.”

“You didn’t see him then. Kit, he was-”

“Yeah, because the thing with you didn’t work. I bet he was fucked up about it, but it was never about me. ”

Livvy crosses her arms, stubborn as a mule and just as strong. “He needs you.”

“Sure,” Kit says, “like a thief needs a crowbar. But I’ve taught him about picking locks. He’ll be fine.”

“Could you, for just a fucking second, pretend like I know what I’m saying about my own twin brother and listen ?” Livvy snarls.

A half mocking sweep of the arm: “Go ahead.”

“He does need you, Kit. Not just to help solve this situation. He was devastated when you left- I’ve never seen him quite like that before, not once, and it wasn’t just because of me. I know you don’t want to believe it, but he lov-”

“No.”

“Kit!”

“Don’t you dare stand there and tell me that. I don’t want to hear it.”

She makes a deeply frustrated noise in the back of her throat: “Why not?!”

“Because,” Kit grits out, “it’s not fucking true.”

“But-”

“I told him, okay?” Kit snaps. “I told him, back then, and it changed nothing. I was never anything more than- than a shiny new toy, someone he could drag around and have fun with. It was never about me , Livvy, it was about the first guy his age who wasn’t either related to him or a piece of shit, and good for him!! I’m glad I could help for a bit! But I can’t- I can’t- I can’t let myself believe it means anything again. Livvy, you’re my friend, too, but let’s not pretend you wouldn’t bleed me like a pig if it would make Ty even slightly happier. I can’t do it, okay? I don’t have anything else to give.”

Livvy tries: “I wouldn’t-”

“You’re doing it right now,” says Kit. “You’re even doing it to yourself. Are you happy like this , Livvy? Really? Or are you just sticking around because you think that’s what Ty needs?”

The ghost says: “Fuck you.”

“Don’t look at me like that. I’m not even the one who dragged you back up.”

A sneer:

“You didn’t stop him.”

Kit lunges.

Something is deeply, deeply wrong.

It takes a small eternity. The fingers of his right hand cramp with the bone-deep certainty of the cold, but he sets his jaw, ignoring the oppressing pressure of Livvy’s presence grasping at him with much more force than a non-corporeal being should have any right to. She’s dead . She can’t keep him. That’s not how it works- that’s not what happens, and Kit shoulders through.

When he emerges, shivering, her eyes are as wide as plates.

She opens her mouth- Kit snarls, something primal taking over- and she snaps it shut with an expression of deep resentment.

Wordlessly, she turns her back and leaves.

And he’s the coward?

It takes him a long time to stop shaking. It’s not even the cold; it’s the fragile, flimsy way it’d made him feel, like ice ready to shatter. The pain is nearly welcome compared to that.

Distantly, Kit thinks his phone vibrates a few times while he gets himself together. It’s such a far off worry it barely registers until he can breathe again, uncurling himself from a fetal-like position next to the wall. God. With numb fingers, he clicks on his messages.

Jem. Jem, and an answer.

Not much, Kit thinks, could make him smile right now. This does.

It’s not a nice smile. It’s not a nice smile, but it’ll do.

He does get lost on the way back, though.

It’s fine. If you keep walking long enough, eventually you’ll get somewhere.

And, anyway, it’s not his fault every single hallway looks exactly the same. The Scholomance, Kit thinks, was designed by someone who thought labyrinthine was in fashion and so was bare, grey stone. You could drop a Minotaur at the center and it would not find a way out in seven years. It’d have to make itself wax wings. It’d have to drown.

At least it’s marginally warmer without any ghosts around. Raymond’s coat tail does briefly infringe upon his peace of mind, but the local spirit grimaces at him and disappears through a wall. Kit’s not even offended. He gets it.

He would also disappear through walls if he could. He’s done that once or twice, actually; it’s called climbing through windows.

Still. Ghosts do have an advantage in that field.

The window he’d nearly fallen through on his first day is, therefore, a welcoming sight. He has kind of some idea of how to get back from here.

“You’re really quite low, though,” Kit tells it. “That doesn’t seem safe.”

It doesn’t answer, which is good news.

The halls get less and less dusty as he goes on. His fingers stop leaving cleaner trails on the walls, gathering a thick layer of grime themselves. There’s a packet of tissues in his pocket, which means he can get most of it off, but seeing it there reminds him of Mina’s own sticky fingers, and it’s just- he misses home. He misses his family.

It’s better like this, though. If even shadowhunters are already trying to use him, they’re probably safer with him away. At least for now.

He wonders what his dad- what his first dad would say. Nothing good, probably. Nothing helpful.

What would his first mom say? Kit doesn’t know. She hadn’t stuck around long enough for him to be able to guess. Then again, maybe that’s an answer in and of itself. Maybe she’d agree with him.

Tessa wouldn’t. Kit sighs, shoving cleaner hands into his pockets.

“Herondale?”

“ Fuck ,” he groans.

The centurion, sword fortunately sheathed at her hip, raises a judgemental eyebrow. “Hello. I was unaware there were any cremations here today.”

He’s taken aback for a second before he realizes that the dust coating his jeans is peeling off, leaving a gray, grimy trail on the ground. Maddening. It’s stone, who the fuck cares- she should be at home with dust by now, old as their fucking traditions are, no chance centurions lower themselves to do spring cleaning.

None of that leaves his mouth. Instead, he smiles blankly and says: “Can I help you?”

Looking a lot like she wants nothing more than to correct him on the proper usage of can versus may , the centurion replies “No, I don’t think you can. However ”, and, with a flourish, takes an envelope out of her pocket, “I believe I can help you. This was left with the rest of the mail this morning. We checked for traps.”

The reason is clear. There is no name on it besides his, not even an address at all, and none of the marks of a fire message. “And it came out negative?”

“ Obviously,” she rolls her eyes.

He takes the envelope. It’s immediately, nearly dropped.

What the fuck? Even to his numb fingers, the stiff paper is cold- much, much colder than it should be, nearly enough to burn. His hand cramps again; he fumbles with the envelope, catching it at the last second.

The centurion scoffs. “Jace Herondale is alive and well, I presume? We all wish him a fruitful marriage.”

Envelope forgotten, Kit tucks it into an inner pocket and straightens up:

“Thanks. Virginia Whitecastle, was it?” Same patrol shifts as Zach. Which means he’s off duty right now, and yet was not the one to bring him the letter. Fuck shit damnit. “How’s your brother? Still hasn’t been sent out?”

Her upper lip curls. Bingo.

“He’s too important to be on the field,” she blusters.

“Oh, I bet. Don’t worry. I’m sure your brother is very, uh… integral to the cause, somehow. What’s he called again?... “

Whitecastle’s face is a silent mask of fury. “Shut it, H- Carstairs. I’m not here for chit chatting. Some of us are working, you know- you may want to check your correspondence yourself from now on.”

“Of course”, Kit says sweetly. “Thanks again for taking the time. I know your family is very busy.”

Her hand twitches toward the pommel of her sword; Kit tips his chin up, daring her. It twitches again, but she moves it away, her jaw set.

“You’re welcome,” she grits out.

Her tightly wound retreat, it must be said, is a sight for sore eyes.

Zach’s door looks the same as it has always been, which is to say: better than a lot of people.

The doorknob is a beautiful round mirror, as silver as mercury. Kit can never get himself to grip it right away- it always feels like he’s going to dirty it, somehow. Even the wood itself is shiny. The zipper on this hoodie, Kit knows, is rusted.

Eventually, you do have to face the music. The smooth surface of the doorknob feels judgmental.

“Christopher.”

Of course.

Zach is waiting for him on the bed.

Much like the door, he is- hatefully well groomed. Shoulders squared, hair carefully combed to a solid geometric shape, uniform precisely creased. His shoes shine so bright Kit starts automatically planning how to steal them.

When Zach’s eyes flick up to meet his, they’re shadowed by a deep scowl.

The only saving grace is that his sword has been carefully laid out on the dresser, out of arm’s reach. He’s not optimistic enough about human nature to assume Zach did it on purpose.

Resentfully, Kit allows the door behind him to slam shut with a bang. Zach winces. Good. Kit hopes he broke his precious door.

“It’s been an hour,” Zach informs him briskly.

“I’m sorry,” snaps Kit, “was I being timed?”

Thin lips purl like an asshole. “You know that’s not the point, Christopher. I can’t keep covering for your shenanigans. It’s not easy, people have already seen you chasing after ghosts like a madman-”

“You wanted a Herondale,” says Kit. “Don’t complain now that you’ve got one.”

“It’s not about that; I can’t keep protecting you.”

Halfway through hanging up his jacket, Kit pauses. “ Protecting me?”, he softly repeats.

Zach grimaces and turns his hands palm up in the air, pacifying: “Look, you know I think you belong here. You’re a shadowhunter too. But some people think- you weren’t raised as one of us, you didn’t drink from the cup, you don’t even live with other shadowhunters…”

“Jem was a Silent Brother. Tessa-”

“-is a warlock”, says Zach, “and Carstairs is retired, which isn’t supposed to happen. Face it. Your entire family is an outlier.”

Kit tugs the worn denim back onto his shoulders, its weight unnaturally light without the anchor of Oliver’s dagger. A muscle twitches in Zach’s jaw. His big hands flex, ripple the fabric of his gloves, but nothing else moves- still the perfect statue of a centurion. Raymond would be proud.

“And?”

“You can’t let them have leverage”, Zach emphasizes. “There are some concessions you get from being Jace Herondale’s cousin, but once people stop thinking you’re fun, they’ll- you’ll lose all privileges. Stop hanging out with the Blackthorn. He’s a ticking bomb.”

In a velvet tone, Kit says: “Would you like to elaborate on that?”

“Stop getting mad at me. I’m the one who should be angry- you’re making people think I’m a cuckold!”

“I haven’t done shit. It’s not my fault your kind doesn’t understand the concept of friendship. And, anyway, cuckold ? What the fuck kinda word choice is that? We’re not married, Zacharias.”

Zach says: “ Is it friendship, though? He has your fucking necklace.”

“It might be a little too complex for your little shadowhunter brain to understand,” Kit sneers, “But outside of this death trap of a cult, some of us manage to have meaningful friendships without having to have our skin burned about it.”

“You can’t possibly be comparing that to parabatai.”

The very idea is repugnant. Still- “I’m sorry, were you there for me when my dad fucking kicked it?”

“You haven’t talked in years!”

“As far as you know,” Kit scoffs.

“Why does it have to be fucking Tiberius Blackthorn, anyway? Can’t you pick literally anyone else?”

Kit takes a step closer. His hand grips the back of a chair, nails biting into the wood. “Oh? Would you like to explain to me why Ty is such a bad choice, then?”

Wisely, Zach stays silent.

“C’mon, now, don’t be shy. Tell me exactly what your thought process was on that one.”

“See?” Zach blurts out, glaring. “You’re even defending him now!”

It’s hard not to laugh at that. Kit doesn’t even try. “I never said I didn’t care. I’d like to believe I wouldn’t go for such an obvious lie, dollface.”

“You’re in love with him.”

Wood creaks. “ Don’t,” Kit bites out, “ ever say that again, or I swear, Zacharias Cross, I will end you.”

“You couldn’t.��I’m just saying what everyone’s thinking, anyway.”

Carefully easing his death grip on the back of the chair, Kit puts forward a smile. “Oh, I love hearing gossip. Do go ahead.”

Stupidly, he does. “The Blackthorn’s family is half changeling already, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Tiberius were one of them, too. You know that. I don’t care how many privileges he gets because he’s the Unseelie King’s in law, the only one allowed headphones in the training room-”

“It’s not a privilege. He needs them.”

Zach makes a dismissive noise. “That’s what he wants you to think. The precious little Blackthorn- Ragnor Fell nearly bites off the head of anyone who dislikes him, it’s pathetic. You can’t expect people not to assume anyone who wants to be around that has ulterior reasons. You can’t expect them not to want to balance the scales a little.”

“I see.” Kit does. “Those people your friends?”

“Maybe. Maybe so.”

Kit allows the smile he can feel tugging at his mouth. Judging by Zach’s expression, he doesn’t find it very reassuring. What a shame.

“They actually tell you what they plan to do with their ulterior motives, or do you just do whatever the fuck they say and hope it works for the best?”

“Don’t- it’s fine, okay? They’re mad right now, but it’ll just blow over. I just need you to keep your head down.”

The bark of laughter startles both of them.

Kit leans into it, throwing his head back, until the hysteria bubbling up inside of him has left his stomach empty. He bares his teeth:

“Really? You think I can just keep my head down and everything will be fine ?”

“Sure. You’re a shadowhunter- you’re a Herondale. We’ll be fine. Just- just need to be careful, right now, just need you to stop acting like a Market rat, and then everything will be alright. It’s not like this shit will last forever.”

That’s hilarious. Laughter punches Kit’s throat, but he presses his lips together, grinning. The expression on Zach’s face nearly sends him right back into a fit. God. He should be spending more time around Zach, he really should; this is fucking priceless.

“Zach”, Kit manages, “They tried to kill you.”

A flinch. The smooth planes of Zach’s forehead scrunch up into mountain ranges, his confusion palpable. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Heather sent you to a famously shadowhunter-killing poltergeist in your uniform .”

“I mean, I know she wanted Ty to die-”

Now that’s new. Kit takes in a sharp inhale, reeling. “You knew?”

“It wasn’t subtle, of course I fucking knew. I knew as soon as Mayhew told me about the assignment- That’s why I volunteered. We don’t have enough centurions to be wasting them out of grudges; I knew you’d be acting up again, and I could handle it, anyway.”

“Aww. Could you?” A hysterical grin stretches Kit’s mouth a little too wide. He can see it in Zach, clear as day; the curl of his upper lip, the unnerved twist of his fingers against the bed, leaning away from him. “You were a second away from being minced meat when I saw you.”

“I had it under control-”

“She gave you physical weapon s to fight a ghost .”

“It worked the first time!”

Kit leans against the wall, running a hand through his hair. “You know, I did wonder about that. How could a poltergeist have turned up in Devon without me knowing about it? I have been dealing with those things for years.”

Zach’s eyes dart from him to the door and back, a cornered animal. Broad fingers twitch restlessly. His weapon is still laid out of immediate reach, an useless tool this far from home. Kit bets he’s regretting it now.

“Unless, of course, there was no poltergeist. Not really.”

“There was,” Zach immediately protests, “They wouldn’t-”

Kit drops the smile, face turning to stone. It makes Zach take a sharp inhale.

“They wouldn’t- what? Lie to you about it? You just admitted to believing they’re at least attempted murderers. Tell me, Zach. Did anything even happen when you walked into that first ‘haunted’ house?”

Silence. His lips twitch upwards.

“Yeah. That’s what I thought.”

“That makes no sense,” says Zach, empty.

A carefully casual shrug. Kit’s hand finds the doorknob behind his back, curling around the key ring. “Face it, Zach”, he says. “Your entire social circle is a death cult."

"You're lying. You’ve always hated them- of course you're lying! You want to keep me away from them so you can have your way with Blackthorn! Well, fuck that shit, I’m not falling for that!" Zach stands up, a head taller, two heads wider. Kit's back touches the perfect door:

"Alright. You’ve done me a favor, Cross, so I’ll do you one better. If they don't think you're disposable, if you feel like they actually care about you- then why don’t they know you're only second gen?"

Mid-step, Zach freezes.

"How do you-"

"Your surname was the first clue. Cross isn’t really a shadowhunter name, is it?” Kit says. “You guys like to pretend you’re not painfully Christian where it matters. Now, Zacharias- that’s a good, respectable name for a shadowhunter, if a little overused. I never understood the urge to recycle all the same names.”

“Kit…”

“You have my dad to thank for yours, you know? Jem oversaw your mother's Ascent. Sarah- the real poltergeist- that’s what made me think about it, because why wouldn’t you accept at least a little disguise, unless you’re overcompensating- but he’s the one who really confirmed it for me,” Kit adds, pleased. “That's the thing about him being a retired Silent Brother; he can actually talk , now. You'd be surprised just how much ."

Unlike some, Zach doesn’t look good that pale. It just makes him look unwell.

"You can't tell them. Please."

Kit can't help it: he coos, as sweet and cloying as honey. "Aww, what's wrong, Cross? Do you not trust your friends to stick by you?" He clicks his tongue. "Afraid to find out how little they really care? You can't escape that, you know. No matter how fast you run, you’ll always just be- their tool . You’re not even that important, you know? They were talking about replacing you."

Zach’s hand closes around the pommel.

Kit lurches back, twisting the doorknob, and the cold air of the hallway hits his back like a physical wall- Zach's eyes widen in horror; he takes one, two, three quick steps forward- Kit slams the door shut on his face-

And, at the end of his last shred of self control, Kit does what he does best.

He runs.

#alex wont shut up #alex's arty: writing #tda #tsc #sobh #twp #kit herondale #kit x ty #ty blackthorn #livvy blackthorn #zach au #a study in greys #blood tw #self harm tw

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