#thant's my husband

[hstylesmermaid]

❤️‍🔥I died dead ❤️‍🔥

Lando fucking Norris arriving at Silverstone GP knowing he's the #1

[bigavidmostallsportsfansaftyco]

Wa a know what George bush not sr but George bush jr did I would have preferred if mr bill Clinton’s vice presidents right hand man won the presidential election bush one a narrow squeaker election in flarida paper ballots jbodh not st but jr gose in to iraq and Asante’s gose to wall for Arabian oil and bush owns a oil gas business hemself a nother guns in butter got no gut no glory tough root in totem te Ian like Lyndon herald names Jonson was who escalated the veitnnam war and go a hundreds aboun hundreds opinions thousands of our innisent troops killed and left thir momies with no husband to take of the young kids bush not stbbuy jr from midland s we’ll blue coller town in Texas went in to Iraq thaught he was a tough better man like lbjna guns in butter demionic wicked no good keester who eskalated the 1950 60s cruet nam war and gif hundreds appointed thousand of our innisent shoulders killed for no reason a war I’m a peace loving old school hippie wood stick era a war we should have state out to be gin with it wasent like the japs blamed pestilence garner or sama laden s bomb king 911of the nyc world trade s enter towers we need to reall y to mind our foutain pollacy business bush jr not sr his dad who so defantsly warns him bush jr not to go in to Iraqi and to go after s Adam Husain the evil Iraqi dicktatar but bush jr de died him any way and went in

To Iraq any like a shirt with a wanted post

Et he was the shirf in town and the brush jr not sr thaugh he could get peice to the land and rid of the world of a o other normal kadafi ans a nother ruthless wild sick mean dictator he thaught wrong alfully dead wrong it’s be cause of bushes feffed up restarted dumb ass he went in to Iraq so desptetalt to remove sadam Husain the evial but let’s say he bush jr dude d go in to Iraq a kill Husain leaves to a nother conlclusain when he Husain like the putain of todays russia who did the same thing thing Husain did by being greedy power hungry thirsty for more blood lust and might in power wo replace the he e Eli Iraqi dicktatet Husain we he get too sick or I’ll to do his job or passes a way who the hell replases hi or who in the hells world has the enevidaple task of replacing him his son i Thant really do nt think he sadam Husain had a sun or even daughter he just has nj he sadam Husain was just a mean old so be cause of bush jr ass we have all the he problems we have in the middle east today palistine vs it’s real god time clock be for his no matter whatbtrumphant red turn to save all his good church going people. My hope community church people my mana squan and my United methodist going people I’m a devout christain I love jusus the sone of go who no matter what is going to comb back wone last time to save all his church going people no matter whstbdenamstionnyou aremwtho sty Egyptian Catholic Greek epispal Lutheran or pilgteam preyesbtterainnchurch usabwith the greivesces

Jewishnbuddiis a wicked wich that I’m a wake a salaried self or acting white witch of healing holistic craft of spear Italy healing

Inabsalutr love if no bd cause bsck to thre oraganial stour bush jr not sr went in to Iraq to remove bush for war crimes on in vsiding 1990iraqui gulf war be he thaught he has the Mich o us tough gun toting guns n butter us president of of the United States of America like Lyn who eskalated in he fenam a when he’s took office for jfk when’s he’s was assassin Ted in the early sixty’s Dallas Texas and ot all air us poor inns emt troops killed for no reason at all hundred apon of thousands et our innocent men in the war the mouthed little kids now with a father to take care of thir kids poor widdiows no father for thir kids mother poor mama has to work and watch her kids shame on former us Husain butter us Texan president none other than obj who su seized jfk whe n he was assinatef with sadam Husain the Iraqi evial mennanicing dicktater gone this no sex toy or war toy for the evial dictator r the iotola of Iran to play with rembrr when jimmy carter was president way back in the nineteen sevandys the Iranian Iran Ian war with the origami’s iotola deceased the shard remember when the country was then with the shard inmchargebpessia no Iran later the country became Iran them I was a little boy then born in 1976 in dint watch tv mutch then now I watch every thing now cnn wolf blizzer news nation news max my country is verry importanty to me and my friend family who live and online church and streaming meet me online buttinevdcres liberal msnbc nbc want to get liberal Fox News or even abc I used to watch and now Iran and now he iotola is he telran is going to take it on a h bus and other news nicent nato people and be cause od bushes Texas gun in butter lbj police’s just like win no on the brink of be nuked or on a he brink of ectinctain or www3 looser suckey exexp for Jonson bacause od what George bush jr not sr did in the Persian gif Iraq be stsy safe eversnyd one ilove my country Alabama nj state of Alaska and suport at our armed forded snd troops fire end surviesies and police and state troopers and border potrol I’ve

[clementinesgulag]

✧ Day 20- Pumpkin Carving! ✧

Sometimes you need some chicken soup for the soul, and sometimes thant chicken soup is actually pumpkin soup made from the aftermath of toddler Moroha slaughtering a pumpkin. 

Mama definitely has another pumpkin hidden up her kimono sleeves, she knows her feral daughter and her equally feral husband far too well to think one would suffice for their level of halloween spirit. 

You can pry these good parents from my cold dead hands sunrise ;; 

kofi - patreon - website - instagram

[gallavictorious]

It's such a weird thing to do tho - go gay friends hunting. "Imma be friends with you, but only if you're gay!" Mickey would find that ridiculous, lol. But I'd find it hilarious if Mickey actually made friends with some gay dudes while Ian ended up disappointed because they don't "do it" for him. ;)

While I agree that the sole fact of a shared sexuality isn’t necessarily very much to build a friendship upon, I don’t find it all that strange that gay people living in a heteronormative society would want gay friends: as long as not being straight is perceived as setting you apart and marking you as ‘other’, finding a group and a space in which you are the norm can be quite important. In a world of perfect sexual equality, seeking out specifically gay friends might be weird; in the world we live in, not so much.

However, not every gay person will think having specifically gay friends is important or desirable, and my instinct would be to agree with you on Mickey finding the notion ridiculous. I'd be a little surprised if going friend shopping is his idea, unless something happens to prompt this sudden wish, but who knows? He might surprise us!

No matter who suggests it, though, I'd love for Mickey to find some friends who will adore him because everyone should love him always (even if I tend to think that Mickey isn't only pretty unconcerned about having gay friends but having friends in general)! But to be honest, I'm not sold on the notion of Ian ending up disappointed because he's had a lot of disappointment to deal with already. Yes, he's married to the love of his life and that's not nothing, but it's also not a cure all and I think out boy's been struggling quite a bit lately. Him having some fun wouldn't be so bad, would it?

Still, I could kind of see them getting to whatever LGTB+ space they've chosen and Mickey's still not convinced of this idea, but Ian's excited, all ”c'mon, Mick, it'll be fun, there's gotta be some interesting people here!”

Eyeing the partying crowd with characteristic skepticsm Mickey mutters something about only seeing a bunch of [semi-offensive adjective] [slur] and not knowing why they're even doing this because there's no way they're going to meet anyone even remotly fun here.

Ian shrugs, deliberatedly. ”Well, I mean, you probably won't.”

”The fuck's that supposed to mean?”

”Just saying, you're not exactly a people person.”

”Not a– ! Fuck you, I can be a people person. But in case you haven't noticed, most people are fucking morons. Not worth my goddamned time.”

”Uh-huh.”

Ian's smiling and looking condescending as fuck and maybe Mickey wants to punch him a little, but he doesn't, he takes an aggressive sip of his beer instead, and he's never been good at backing down from a challenge, not even when he knows what Ian is doing, so obviously the whole thing escalates into our favourite husbands heading off to see who can find the most and the best friends before the night is through.

And you know, Mickey isn't wrong about how he can (fake) be(ing) a people person if he's properly motivated and right now he's motivated as hell, so in the end he presents Ian with no less than half a dozen people that he persistently claims are real fucking funny, just great guys, you know, wouldn't mind hanging out with them for the rest of my life.

He's lying through his teeth; he doesn't give a rat's ass about any of these dudes (well, two of the dudes are actually chicks, but whatever, he ain't got nothing against women as long as he doesn't have to fuck them), but whatever it takes to stick it to Ian, right, and of course they should all meet up again for a beer on Wednesday, that sounds super fun, doesn't that sound super fun, Ian?

And they do meet up (somehow... let's not question the corona of it, okay?) and it turns out that these random people ain't actually so bad? Hell of a lot better thant he three potential friends Ian's managed to scrounge up, anyway; that trio quickly reveal themselves to be self-important and boring assholes. Ian readily admits as much and admits defeat – but he's not actually very disappointed about it, because the end result is still them having six gay friends to hang out with. (And part of Mickey will forever wonder if Ian didn't plan it like this, right from the start... but so fucking what if he did, it was still Mickey who charmed them.)

How about it, nonnie? Everybody wins? Acceptable?

[tastingmellow]

Try Me

A/N: So I realized I’ve been making the reader more sweet and there is nothing wrong with that but I want to show a side of the reader that Erik has yet to see!

Summary: Somebody speaks down on your daughter and they aren’t scared of Erik...but they should be terrified of you.

Warnings: Cursing.

Word Count: You know I don’t know so why even assume that I might this time?

“Erik, we gotta go. The wedding starts soon, I don’t want to be late.” You say, smoothing our your daughter’s red dress. She twirled around happily as Erik made his way out of the the living room, fixing the cuffs in his shirt. You adjusted his tie and smoothed out his jacket.

“I forgot how good you looked in a suit, baby.” You mumbled, mostly to yourself as you eyed him. He chuckled and kissed your lips. “God bless sun dress season.” He spoke, rubbing your back. You wore a yellow sundress with white scandals, deciding against heels since your cousin’s wedding was outside.

“Mommy, do you have my sweater?” Nala asked, rubbing her arms. “Cold already? Here, baby.” You helped her out it on before you all made your way out the door.

_____________________________

On the car ride to the venue you got a text from your mom. ‘Vena is coming.’ Is all it read and you groaned, leaning your head back. Erik glanced over at you, grabbing your hand. “What happened?”

“My aunt Vena is coming.” Erik gave a confused look so you further explained. “She’s the super religious woman you met at the reunion last year. She kept saying ‘Sex out of marriage ain’t God’s will.’” Erik nodded in realization, irritation covering his face.

“Oh, yeah. That old broad that kept calling Nala a brat and ‘unworthy’ to even be in the family?” You nodded, sighing deeply. Your great aunt Vena was so religious and foul, she was on your Dad’s side. She despised you and your mother because you were born outside of of marriage and Vena was just convinced that your mother was the reason your dad stopped coming around her and going to church. That was far from the truth.

“All I know is, today is not the day. Better find somebody to play with.”

___________________________________

The wedding was absolutely beautiful. Your cousin looked radiant and her husband looked handsome as ever. The guests had now moved to the reception, talking and waiting for the bride and groom to enter. You, Erik, and Nala sat with your parents, talking and chuckling at everyone who came to gush over how gorgeous Nala was.

“She’s so beautiful, I bet she’s just the smartest thing.” Your grandmother spoke, Nala smiling and hugging her legs. You nodded and smiled at the two of them. “She is, so intelligent and she’s such a sponge. Absorbs everything.” You spoke, referring to the fiasco of her repeating everything Erik had said.

“A sponge covered in dirt maybe.” You heard someone mumble and turned, noticing your Aunt Vena. You gave her a tight smile, Erik lightly squeezing your thigh. “Aunt Vena...” You spoke, giving her a weak hug as she gave your mother a fake smile, you as well. “Hey baby, still snacking up with this man, I see.” Your eye twitched, before you slightly chuckled. “Yes, we’re actually engaged.”

“But not married.” She spoke. If your grandmother hadn’t walked off with Nala to greet her cousins Vena would’ve been put in check. You were always taught to respect your elders...as long as they respected you. “And son, you should keep your hands where we can see them.” With that she walked off to hassle someone else.

Erik scowled while you sighed, placing your elbows on the table and rubbing your face, thanking God you’d decided against makeup. Erik leaned over, kissing your cheek and reassuring you that all would be fine while your father had to legit hug your mother with all his strength for her not to get up and swing.

_______________________________

The bride and groom had made their way out and the food was served. The cake was cut and everything was going well. Nala was off dancing with her big cousins and Erik and your older brother were talking about something. You sat with your mother and some cousins taking a sip from your champagne.

“I don’t know why Aunt Vena acts the way she does. She’s the one who got nearly 5 abortions from sleeping with a married man.” Your cousin spoke, having had too much alcohol. You chuckled in disbelief, so many hidden things about Aunt Vena had been revealed. And apparently they weren’t hidden, everyone knew but no one really talked about it.

“For a woman thinks we don’t know that she doesn’t know who Mike’s father is, she talk a sh—“ you were cut off by your daughter trying to climb on your lap, tears covering her face. You immediately put down your drink, grabbing her and putting her in your lap. The table became silent as everyone gave Nala a worried look.

“What’s wrong, honey?” It took a minute for her to calm down before Nala spoke up in a tiny voice. “That lady yelled at me...” she spoke and pointed to Vena. Your cousin who was just a few months from turning 17 came up to you. “Nala bumped into Vena on accident and for some dumbass reason she called Nala a bastard and pushed her.”

You blinked before looking down at your daughter who was distraught. You thanked your younger cousin before getting up and walking to Erik, placing Nala in his arms. “Hold her and find somebody to go to the ATM machine. Imma need bail.”

You made your way to Vena, tapping her shoulder before politely speaking. “Hey, Aunt Vena. Did you tell Nala she was a bastard and put your hands on her?” You spoke calmly while your Aunt rolled her eyes.

“If I did she deserved it. That little brat doesn’t know how to sit still. I should expect that from her though. Her mama was made the same way she was.” Aunt Vena nodded, taking a sip of her drink before attempting to walk off.

You made your way back in front of her and the tension caught almost everyone’s attention. “I don’t know why but you think just because you’re older Thant you can disrespect anyone, grown folks included.”

“They should respect their elders.” She spoke and you shook your head, chuckling. “With an elder like you, you deserve to have yo’ ass whooped.” Vena looked at you shocked, turning to your father. “Get your child.”

Your mother stepped up before he could speak and shook her head. “No, you need to learn how to stop being an old bag and start respecting your family.” Vena laughed and before she could speak you started again.

“You talk so much shit for a woman who slept with a married man, had a baby out of wedlock, the thing you condemn me and my mom for, being an entire ran through tunnel, and don’t act like we don’t know your oldest son is a pedophile. His ass should be in jail and you know it. But yet there he is. He has touched MULTIPLE kids in our family, and not just girls. But his ass is still invited to family functions. You don’t even know who the father of your youngest is yet you have the audacity to try to condemn for having a child...with a man I love!?”

You looked at her. “What typa bullshit is that?” You were her shit out and she was pissed. “Little girl, watch who you talking t—“ you put your hand up for her to stop talking. “Bitch, shut the fuck up.”

“If I don’t? What’s gonna happen? Your man gon’ put his hands on me? He a sinner and a woman beater?” She spoke, looking to Erik who was livid from the way she spoke to you.

You stepped up, getting closer and lowering your voice, your eyes never moving from hers. “No, he don’t put his hands on women. But I’ll I’ll beat your ass regardless of the consequences. You been putting your hands and mouth on everybody in this family but you touched the wrong child today. So, get to stepping or I swear, on my baby girl, I will fuck up yo life for eternity and make you wish yo’ ass could die faster.”

With that you walked away, grabbing your purse and walking past Erik, nudging your head to go. You kissed your cousin and parents good bye before walking out.

_________________________________

You had put Nala to bed and you were tired, still irritated but you were better than earlier. You had gotten a text from your mom once you’d gotten home, ‘Vena was so angry when you left 😭. Btw, Tyson was taken to jail tonight. I’m so proud of you, baby. You had me thinking you were about to kill her right there.’ You laughed and told her good night before getting in the shower.

You were lathering your body up when you felt hands wrap around your waist, your back pressing against a muscular chest. You smiled, leaning your head back against him. “If I ain’t know any better I’d thought you were in the military the way you went cold today.” He spoke, lightly kissing your cheek as you laughed. “I just couldn’t take the damn hypocrisy anymore. She deserved it.” You shrugged and reached back, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“You looked good threatening her old ass.” You laughed loudly before he leaned over and kissed you, his tongue slightly grazing over yours. You sighed and turned around, jumping and wrapping your legs around him. “You think so?” He nodded and softly kissed your neck while grabbing at your ass. “But you’re right, she deserved it. I thought I was scary? Babygirl, you are a couple more levels than me.”

“Only when it comes to my little one. Mother’s instinct.” You shrugged and laughed as he kissed your cheek. “Well, you looked so fine angry, as generic as that shit sound. Let me show you Daddy’s instinct.”

_______________________________

A/N: Like and share! Comment and give me feedback! Y’all ready for more fics?

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[hstylesmermaid]

LANDO NORRIS WINS THE DUTCH GRAND PRIX!!! 🧡🧡🧡🧡

I knew it!!! Let me recap, Taylor Swift wore a lot of orange on her last London show and sang Getaway Car and Florida

Also, Lando got "injured", maybe a little cut aaaaand Taylor also sang Dead by a thousand cuts...

Last, but not least, LANDO NORRIS IS A TWO TIMES GRAND PRIX WINNER