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Hills Animal Home [Petopher]
Day 3: "Stop coming back"
For the @petopher-events
Tags: pre-slash, animal shelter, mentions of covid-19
[It's not betaed so if you find any mistake, let me know]
[AO3 link]
Hills Animal Home
The Hills Animal Home was an animal shelter that had opened at the beginning of the pandemic. Many pet owners abandoned their animals with the stupid idea that they could get infected by them. The shelter saved them from almost certain death. The place was big, it was on the outskirts of Beacon Hills, bordering to other two towns. The main building had space for a veterinary clinic with an operating room and spacious rooms for sick animals. Behind the building there were several square yards divided in areas for cats, dogs and other animals. There were big kennels for them to sleep outside if they so wanted and also closed huts with beds if it was cold outside. There were also large play areas with little trees to climb for the cats and lots of toys to play for the dogs. And everything was clean and cared for thanks to all the workers there. They did not receive any help from the State or the County, but it was rumored that the owner was some millionaire animal lover.
Chris hadn't paid much attention to it, but as the pandemic dragged on and things in Beacon Hills had settled down, he felt lonely and bored. He had had dogs when he was younger. Well, they were hunting dogs, and he wasn't allowed to treat them with love like any other family would do. He wanted to do it right this time.
He went to Hills Animal Home early on a weekday, when he was less likely to meet other people there. He put on his mask before getting out of the car. There was a woman in her seventies at the reception desk, her white hair in a bun and dressed in a striking pink flower shirt. She gave him a big smile as he approached the counter, or that was what he thought giving that he couldn't see her face behind the mask.
“Welcome! What can I do for you?” she asked.
“I want to buy a dog.”
“Adopt.”
“Huh?” Chris frowned.
“We don't sell dogs, we have them up for adoption,” she explained. “Would you like to adopt a dog?”
“Yes, I... I want to adopt a dog, please.”
He suspected they would charge him some money later with whatever excuse, but he already intended to pay so he didn't care. The woman called someone through an intercom, and another woman appeared. This one was a bit younger but not by much. She was wearing a skirt suit and had a folder in her hand.
“Hello, I'm Miranda. And you are...”
“Argent. Chris Argent.”
“Pleased to meet you,” she said with a little bow without even holding out her hand. Chris had to consciously refrain from doing so. “Come with me, I have some questions for you before we consider you qualified for adoption.”
Chris opened his mouth and closed it again. What was she talking about? He only wanted a dog.
As he learned in the following minutes, it wasn't that easy. Not here at least. These dogs had suffered a lot from the abandonment and even abuse, and they had no intention of handing them over to the first guy who walked through the door. She asked him a lot of questions about his daily life, about his house, his job, his previous pets, his family... He commented that it was a bit invasive (even more than a job interview), and Miranda told him that he was not obliged to answer, but then he would leave without a dog.
It seemed that his answers were satisfying enough, and he was allowed to go see the dogs. What he didn't expect was to find Peter Hale there. He was dressed in casual clothes (more casual than Chris had ever seen him) and was playing with the dogs. There was at least eight of them jumping around him while others ran after the balls he threw at them. He had a big smile on his face. A real smile. Chris had never seen him like that.
When Peter felt someone approaching, he took a mask out of his pocket and put it on. It was strange since Chris was pretty sure that werewolves couldn't get infected. Then Peter realized who he was and stood still. As if following his lead, all the dogs stopped jumping and running and looked toward Chris.
“To what do I owe this visit?” he asked coming closer.
“Mr. Argent is qualified for adoption,” Miranda said, handing Peter a clipboard.
“Thank you, Miranda,” Peter nodded and took the clipboard without taking his eyes from Chris. “You can go back inside.”
“Okay. Good luck, Mr. Hale,” she said and left.
Chris wasn't sure why he needed luck, but he nodded anyway.
“So you came to adopt a dog,” Peter said. It wasn't a question. He took a look at Miranda's report and left it on a table full of toys and treats.
“Do I get to choose?” Chris asked and wasn't surprised by Peter's answer.
“Of course not,” he said with a snort. “You only get to choose if you want a small one or a big one.”
“I don't really care, but I have enough space for a big one.”
“Good. Get one of those and play with them,” Peter said, pointing to the toys on the table.
Chris didn't know why, but he just took one of the knotted ropes and followed Peter to a more open area. The dogs relaxed as soon as Peter did and some of them came to Chris and started playing with him. Peter played with them too, and the man looked the most relaxed Chris had ever seen him, even if the 'wolf kept an eye on him all the time. He looked almost... happy?
Chris wasn't sure how long they were there and for what exactly, but he was having fun so he didn't mind. At some point, Peter walked up to him and with just a couple of gestures, all the dogs turned away except for one. It was dark brown, and Chris couldn't guess what breed, probably a mixed-breed, but he didn't care.
“This is Burger,” Peter said, petting its head. “I think he'll be perfect for you.”
“Burger,” Chris repeated arching an eyebrow. “Can I change his name?”
“No. And you can't turn him into a hunting dog either. I'll make sure of it,” Peter said with a clear threat in his voice.
“I won't. I don't work like that anymore,” Chris answered truthfully.
Peter looked at him, and maybe he was satisfied with his steady heartbeat because he just nodded.
“Let's go to my office.”
The three of them went back into the building and got into a small office with windows to the back yard. Peter sat behind the desk and Chris in front of him with Burger at his feet.
“You're the owner of this place, right?” Chris asked while Peter took out some documents.
“What gave it away?” Peter said sarcastic.
“Why?” That was what he had been wondering from minute one.
Peter shrugged.
“Because I can.”
“A lot of people could, but you did it. Why?”
Peter left some papers in front of him and leaned back in the chair with a pensive expression. He probably wasn't thinking of his reasons for opening an animal shelter, but if he should tell him.
“Cora left, Derek left, most of the McCall pack has left, including the alpha. And now this fucking pandemic and the first thing people do is abandon their pets as if they were not part of the family. The same assholes that refuse to wear a mask,” Peter said almost with a growl.
Pack. That was what this was for Peter, a pack. He was there for the same reason as Chris, he felt lonely.
“Why do you wear it, a mask?” Chris asked curiously while he started to fill the papers.
Peter seemed grateful for the change of subject.
“I may not get sick, but I don't know if I can carry it and infect others. Although it's mostly as an example for my workers.”
“I didn't think you were so aware.”
Chris signed the papers and gave them back. Peter was looking at him with narrowed eyes.
“You don't know me at all, Argent.” Peter got up and went to the office door. “Take care of him, let us know if you need anything and don't forget about the vaccines. You can vaccinate him here or at your own vet,” he said almost like a robot.
Chris hooked Burger to a new leash and left the office with him. Peter disappeared through a door, and Chris took his new dog home.
Not even three weeks later, Chris was back at the Hills Animal Home. Again in the morning of a weekday. Peter appeared immediately at the reception desk with an angry look.
“If you're here to return him-.”
“No, no, Burger is wonderful,” Chris hurried to say. “He's quickly adapted to the house and is a fantastic boy.”
“I'm glad. Why are you here then?” Peter relaxed a bit and rounded the desk towards him.
“I thought... Maybe Burger would feel better with a friend.”
Yeah, that's why he was there, there was no other reason. Right.
“Well, dogs are pack animals so yes, I think it'd be a good idea. Beside, you have the means to take care of both.”
Peter gestured for Chris to follow him, and they went to the dogs enclosure.
“Should I take Burger too,” Chris asked at the door.
“Of course, it's gonna be his companion after all.”
And just like that, they spent a couple of hours playing with the dogs. Peter laughed, he really laughed even if Chris could not see it with the mask, but the sound of it was... The dogs, he had to focus on the dogs. Yeah, he was there for the dogs. Fuck.
Chris left the shelter with a golden retriever with only three legs that jumped higher than any other dog. His name was Nigel. And no, he couldn't change it.
“Stop coming back!” Peter almost whined when Chris returned to the shelter two weeks later. “You're not getting another dog, two are enough for now!”
Chris opened his mouth and closed it again. Burger and Nigel were with him and greeted Peter cheerfully.
“I wasn't... I didn't want another... dog...” Okay, now he didn't have an excuse to be there.
“Then what?” Peter asked, crossing his arms. Chris' eyes went straight to his cleavage (you couldn't blame him). Why was he wearing a V-neck instead of casual clothes like the other days? And why did it have to be so wide? “Oh, I see.”
“What?” He was glad that the mask partially hid his face. Surely he had blushed (which was ridiculous for a man his age).
“You don't need to adopt a dog to get a date.”
“I-I don't-,” Chris stammered.
“I can smell it, Chris, even through the mask. Knowing you, you'd fill your house with dogs before you muster up the courage to ask me out,” Peter sighed, rolling his eyes.
He gave the dogs a treat and turned to the back door while Chris looked at him speechless.
“Pick me up at five!” he said before disappearing.
Well, he now had two dogs and a date. That was a lot more than what he had five weeks ago.
#Teen wolf#Petopher#chris argent#peter hale#fanfic#fanfiction#covid mention#covid19#animals#dogs#pre slash#gay#yaoi#petopher events
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Smokey brand Movie Reviews: I’m In Lesbians With You
It occurs to me that i don’t have a proper review of Scott Pilgrim on here. I really should work through the current backlog of films that i still need to watch; Uncut Gems, The Lighthouse, Parasite, Ready or Not, but i f*cking love Scott and his shenanigans so... Scott Pilgrim it is! Considering how much i love this film and the fact that I’m just going to be gushing about it for however long this review is, let’s just get this out of the way immediately: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is an excellent movie and you should go watch it right now!
The Outstanding
Yo, before anything, can i just express how much i adore this f*cking soundtrack? My taste in music is varies wildly but, at it’s core, my heart beats for the Indie and the New Wave and the Post Punk. For this soundtrack to be packed with so much excellent, underground, indie fair? Oh, my goodness! It’s musical sex to me. Shout out to Nigel Godrich. Motherf*cker did the best of jobs on this one!
Even more than that, the way all of this music is integrated in each scene s absolutely brilliant. There’s not one note out of place or out of line. It’s rare that happens, so deftly that i actually recognize it. Usually, it’s all background noise to accentuate whatever scene but i legit took in everything.
While on the subject of music, i want to take a minute to acknowledge the sound design as a whole. Scott Pilgrim is based on a graphic novel, which i also love, so there is a rather kinetic energy that needs to be conveyed. It’s chock full of all the spastic nonsense us Millennials grew up with like Mario token sound effects and obscure cartoon references. Integrating certain sound effects like the random game noises here or there is absolute brilliance. It lends an air of authenticity to this adaption.
While i can gush about all of the audible genius for years, i would be remiss if i didn’t speak on the goddamn eye candy of this film. Holy sh*t is thing gorgeous! And not just the Evil Ex set pieces, even though those are absolute chaotic bad-assery, this entire film is a work of art. It really is. You can frame almost every shot in this thing, it’s that gorgeous.
Speaking of gorgeous, these costumes are amazing. A lot of them are ripped right out of the comic but they’re like, real clothes. Nothing feels cartoony or comic book-ish, it all feels organic to the tone of film and characters therein. Like, i wear the same kind of sh*t Scott wears. It’s all graphic tees and jeans with me, much to the chagrin of my darling missus.
The writing in this flick is absolutely brilliant. Like, seriously, nothing feels out of place, the dialogue feels organic, and the plot is a pretty decent condensing of the graphic novels original six volumes. I have interactions like these with my friends. I legitimately talk like this. Of course, there is a little polish on some of these line but, overall, it’s pretty on point.
All of this standout awesome can be traced back to the vision of it’s director, Edgar Wright. No one believed in this little experiment so he had carte blanche to create whatever he wanted and he did just that. You can tell there was a real love for this material and while not everything from the books made it into the movie, he did an excellent job of capturing the major beats and important aspects with his absolute mad style of movie making.
The cast in this thing is weirdly perfect. All of them. Every one of them. Seriously, it’s like a who’s who of young Hollywood from way back when, almost all of whom have grown into proper A-list talent and i love it! Alison Pill, Anna Kendrick, Jason Schwartzmen, Ellen Wong, Brandon Routh, and Mae Whitman are all excellent in their respective roles. There are, of course, standouts but before i get to them, i just what to acknowledge how great the casting is, overall, in this movie. You can feel the comradery onset and it’s reflected in the fact that there are no weak performances, at all, in this flick. F*ck, dude, there’s even a Thomas Jane and Clifton Collins cameo in this thing that feels absolutely at home!
This film would be nothing without the right person in the lead. Scott Pilgrim is a neuritic, self-centered, anxiety ridden, asshole of person but still lovable in a very dry and sarcastic kind of way. There are very few that can capture that energy so when i found out Michael Cera as cast in the lead, i knew this movie was in good hands. Every movie i have ever seen him in, Cera carries that energy expertly. He is he living embodiment of Scott Pilgrim. Like, this is MCU levels of casting, for real.
The second role you had to nail to make this work was definitely Ramona Flowers. You had a little more leeway with this one but i think they still nailed it with Mary Elizabeth Winstead. I’ve been a fan of hers since way back when she was in Sky High (I actually love that movie SO much) and even further back with The Ring Two, but that’s more a deep cut than anything. Anyway, Mary is perfect as Ramona and one of the best things about this movie.
So the performances of the Evil Exes are spectacular, Particularly Schwartzman’s. His Gideon Graves was just so smarmy and condescending and disingenuous you couldn’t help but hate his guts. Dude was awesome, no doubt, but he was outshined by what Chris Evan was able to create with Lucas Lee. That’s right, Captain America himself was in Scott Pilgrim as the first Evil Ex and he f*cking killed it! I’ve loved Evans for years. Not Another Teen Movie is actual one of my favorites and he was easily the best thing about those first two Fantastic Four films but you can see him shine in this role, even if it was only a few minutes.
It’s no secret i love Brie Larson. I’ve raved about her performances in the past but it was this movie that made me take notice. Her interpretation of Envy Adams was pitch perfect. It’s melodramatic and over-the-top but at the same time, incredibly vulnerable. Natalie has one hell of an arc in the book and it’s a little short-changed in the movie, but Larson makes gold with what she has to work with. Plus, she actually performs the cover to Metric’s Black Sheep. Those are her vocals and i find that to be absolutely dope.
Of course, you can’t talk about Scott Pilgrim without talking about his gay roommate, Wallace Wells. Dude is one of the best characters in the book and is an absolute scene stealer n this film, thanks to the deft hand of Kieran Culkin. It’s hard for me to praise gay character in cinema because cats always right them as caricature but Culkin’s Wells feels real and grounded, none of that Hollywood gay bullsh*t. Dude is a person that just happens to be gay and i love that.
And last but not least, Aubrey Plaza. There’s a little picture of Julie Powers that is the spitting image of Plaza. Like, her casting is as perfect as Scott’s casting. Seriously, she is what Michael Cera is to Pilgrim. It’s rare a cast in a film is so goddamn perfect. Even the MCU has had some missed but literally every one in this film is absolutely prefect and Plaza might be best of all.
Also, all of the LGBT representation. While the movie didn’t capture all of the many, many, sexual presentations, they didn’t shy away from some of the most prominent. Pilgrim’s roommate Wallace Wells, is extra gay and he has a myriad of boyfriends throughout both the book and film. Nothing too graphic, but there are scenes with them in bed and one pretty heavy make-out sessions early in the film. Hell, they even included Ramona’s one female Ex, Roxy Richter, in one of the best Evil Ex fights of the entire movie. Bravo film, bravo.
The Verdict
I said this in the beginning and just in case the previous gushing didn’t give you a clue, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is a f*cking great film, man. It stands on it’s own as a wonderful coming of age story but it’s so much more than that. It’s a love story to music. It’s one of the best comic adaptions i have ever seen. It’s an ode to the Millennial coming-of-age journey. It’s a nostalgia bomb for kids my age, who did sh*t like play video games all day then spend all night in coffee shops that had live music and f*cking waffles. It’s an amazing representation, and unique presentation, of those early twenties when you aren’t sure of yourself or your direction or anything and you just want to drift through life for as long as possible. It’s heartbreak and new love and learning about who you are, deep down, not some shallow representation or facade. I love Scott Pilgrim because it tells a great story. It tells MY story. And it does it with a banging ass soundtrack, too.
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Smokey brand Movie Reviews: I’m In Lesbians With You
It occurs to me that i don’t have a proper review of Scott Pilgrim on here. I really should work through the current backlog of films that i still need to watch; Uncut Gems, The Lighthouse, Parasite, Ready or Not, but i f*cking love Scott and his shenanigans so... Scott Pilgrim it is! Considering how much i love this film and the fact that I’m just going to be gushing about it for however long this review is, let’s just get this out of the way immediately: Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is an excellent movie and you should go watch it right now!
The Outstanding
Yo, before anything, can i just express how much i adore this f*cking soundtrack? My taste in music is varies wildly but, at it’s core, my heart beats for the Indie and the New Wave and the Post Punk. For this soundtrack to be packed with so much excellent, underground, indie fair? Oh, my goodness! It’s musical sex to me. Shout out to Nigel Godrich. Motherf*cker did the best of jobs on this one!
Even more than that, the way all of this music is integrated in each scene s absolutely brilliant. There’s not one note out of place or out of line. It’s rare that happens, so deftly that i actually recognize it. Usually, it’s all background noise to accentuate whatever scene but i legit took in everything.
While on the subject of music, i want to take a minute to acknowledge the sound design as a whole. Scott Pilgrim is based on a graphic novel, which i also love, so there is a rather kinetic energy that needs to be conveyed. It’s chock full of all the spastic nonsense us Millennials grew up with like Mario token sound effects and obscure cartoon references. Integrating certain sound effects like the random game noises here or there is absolute brilliance. It lends an air of authenticity to this adaption.
While i can gush about all of the audible genius for years, i would be remiss if i didn’t speak on the goddamn eye candy of this film. Holy sh*t is thing gorgeous! And not just the Evil Ex set pieces, even though those are absolute chaotic bad-assery, this entire film is a work of art. It really is. You can frame almost every shot in this thing, it’s that gorgeous.
Speaking of gorgeous, these costumes are amazing. A lot of them are ripped right out of the comic but they’re like, real clothes. Nothing feels cartoony or comic book-ish, it all feels organic to the tone of film and characters therein. Like, i wear the same kind of sh*t Scott wears. It’s all graphic tees and jeans with me, much to the chagrin of my darling missus.
The writing in this flick is absolutely brilliant. Like, seriously, nothing feels out of place, the dialogue feels organic, and the plot is a pretty decent condensing of the graphic novels original six volumes. I have interactions like these with my friends. I legitimately talk like this. Of course, there is a little polish on some of these line but, overall, it’s pretty on point.
All of this standout awesome can be traced back to the vision of it’s director, Edgar Wright. No one believed in this little experiment so he had carte blanche to create whatever he wanted and he did just that. You can tell there was a real love for this material and while not everything from the books made it into the movie, he did an excellent job of capturing the major beats and important aspects with his absolute mad style of movie making.
The cast in this thing is weirdly perfect. All of them. Every one of them. Seriously, it’s like a who’s who of young Hollywood from way back when, almost all of whom have grown into proper A-list talent and i love it! Alison Pill, Anna Kendrick, Jason Schwartzmen, Ellen Wong, Brandon Routh, and Mae Whitman are all excellent in their respective roles. There are, of course, standouts but before i get to them, i just what to acknowledge how great the casting is, overall, in this movie. You can feel the comradery onset and it’s reflected in the fact that there are no weak performances, at all, in this flick. F*ck, dude, there’s even a Thomas Jane and Clifton Collins cameo in this thing that feels absolutely at home!
This film would be nothing without the right person in the lead. Scott Pilgrim is a neuritic, self-centered, anxiety ridden, asshole of person but still lovable in a very dry and sarcastic kind of way. There are very few that can capture that energy so when i found out Michael Cera as cast in the lead, i knew this movie was in good hands. Every movie i have ever seen him in, Cera carries that energy expertly. He is he living embodiment of Scott Pilgrim. Like, this is MCU levels of casting, for real.
The second role you had to nail to make this work was definitely Ramona Flowers. You had a little more leeway with this one but i think they still nailed it with Mary Elizabeth Winstead. I’ve been a fan of hers since way back when she was in Sky High (I actually love that movie SO much) and even further back with The Ring Two, but that’s more a deep cut than anything. Anyway, Mary is perfect as Ramona and one of the best things about this movie.
So the performances of the Evil Exes are spectacular, Particularly Schwartzman’s. His Gideon Graves was just so smarmy and condescending and disingenuous you couldn’t help but hate his guts. Dude was awesome, no doubt, but he was outshined by what Chris Evan was able to create with Lucas Lee. That’s right, Captain America himself was in Scott Pilgrim as the first Evil Ex and he f*cking killed it! I’ve loved Evans for years. Not Another Teen Movie is actual one of my favorites and he was easily the best thing about those first two Fantastic Four films but you can see him shine in this role, even if it was only a few minutes.
It’s no secret i love Brie Larson. I’ve raved about her performances in the past but it was this movie that made me take notice. Her interpretation of Envy Adams was pitch perfect. It’s melodramatic and over-the-top but at the same time, incredibly vulnerable. Natalie has one hell of an arc in the book and it’s a little short-changed in the movie, but Larson makes gold with what she has to work with. Plus, she actually performs the cover to Metric’s Black Sheep. Those are her vocals and i find that to be absolutely dope.
Of course, you can’t talk about Scott Pilgrim without talking about his gay roommate, Wallace Wells. Dude is one of the best characters in the book and is an absolute scene stealer n this film, thanks to the deft hand of Kieran Culkin. It’s hard for me to praise gay character in cinema because cats always right them as caricature but Culkin’s Wells feels real and grounded, none of that Hollywood gay bullsh*t. Dude is a person that just happens to be gay and i love that.
And last but not least, Aubrey Plaza. There’s a little picture of Julie Powers that is the spitting image of Plaza. Like, her casting is as perfect as Scott’s casting. Seriously, she is what Michael Cera is to Pilgrim. It’s rare a cast in a film is so goddamn perfect. Even the MCU has had some missed but literally every one in this film is absolutely prefect and Plaza might be best of all.
Also, all of the LGBT representation. While the movie didn’t capture all of the many, many, sexual presentations, they didn’t shy away from some of the most prominent. Pilgrim’s roommate Wallace Wells, is extra gay and he has a myriad of boyfriends throughout both the book and film. Nothing too graphic, but there are scenes with them in bed and one pretty heavy make-out sessions early in the film. Hell, they even included Ramona’s one female Ex, Roxy Richter, in one of the best Evil Ex fights of the entire movie. Bravo film, bravo.
The Verdict
I said this in the beginning and just in case the previous gushing didn’t give you a clue, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World is a f*cking great film, man. It stands on it’s own as a wonderful coming of age story but it’s so much more than that. It’s a love story to music. It’s one of the best comic adaptions i have ever seen. It’s an ode to the Millennial coming-of-age journey. It’s a nostalgia bomb for kids my age, who did sh*t like play video games all day then spend all night in coffee shops that had live music and f*cking waffles. It’s an amazing representation, and unique presentation, of those early twenties when you aren’t sure of yourself or your direction or anything and you just want to drift through life for as long as possible. It’s heartbreak and new love and learning about who you are, deep down, not some shallow representation or facade. I love Scott Pilgrim because it tells a great story. It tells MY story. And it does it with a banging ass soundtrack, too.
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Ever since 1999’s The Blair Witch Project sent early internet denizens scouring the web to figure out if its spooky, shocking story was actually true, we can’t seem to get enough of found-footage movies.
In the 19 years since Blair Witch’s theatrical run, 18 found-footage horror movies have made $15 million or more at the box office — which constitutes a financial success, considering how cheaply most of these movies are made. (See: The Gallows, which made almost $24 million on a reported production budget of $100,000.) That’s about one hit per year. As niche tastes go, found footage has a nice track record.
The subgenre has also seen its share of genuine blockbusters. Blair Witch and 2008’s Cloverfield became bonafide cultural phenomenons during their days. Two of the Paranormal Activity movies topped $100 million at the US box office and another grossed $80 million, huge hits for three consecutive Halloweens.
As streaming takes over, the market has continued to grow for the kind of low-budget, easy wins that found-footage films can provide, and the barrier to entry for filmmakers looking to try their hand at some quick-and-dirty handheld scares is lower than ever. Searching “found footage” on Amazon Video yielded 222 results.
So what is it about found footage? In an age when you can pull a phone out of your pocket and record movie-quality video, I think there’s something deeply authentic and compelling about a movie that mimics something we ourselves might shoot. It’s escapism in its rawest, most intimate form. Pair it with the primal emotions of horror, the genre that’s home to most of these films, and you have a reliable formula.
Personally, I love found footage, and think it doesn’t get enough credit for how flexible it is: It’s a subgenre that can work for everything from claustrophobic chamber dramas to fantastical epics like Cloverfield and Troll Hunter. I myself often find the cheaper ones, in their rawness, more compelling and more legitimately unsettling than the found-footage movies Hollywood produces. The amateurish aesthetic only heightens their effect.
But as any fan knows, the quality variance is high, and not just because seemingly anybody can make a found-footage movie. You’re as likely to find a dud as something memorable — and you can never be sure which you’re going to get, given these films rarely attract top-tier stars or directors that might serve as some kind of proxy for quality.
However, in the defining paradox of found footage, that can also be their strength. Strip away the big names and movie magic gloss, and you’re left with a couple actors, a camera, and a story — and when the right combination clicks, it can result in an effectively terrifying experience.
This fall, I jumped headlong into the world of shaky cams and sudden pans to something creeping around the corner. I’d seen the big hits and the cultural touchstones — now I wanted to burrow deep into the found-footage catalogs on Amazon Prime, Netflix, and Shudder. (If you haven’t seen The Blair Witch Project, it is on you, my friend, to correct that immediately. I think it holds up. Just don’t expect the scariest movie you’ve ever seen.)
I found some great horror flicks. I also saw some duds. So, as a Halloween treat, and in an effort to uncover some hidden gems, I’m pointing you in the right direction with this list of some of the best found-footage horror available on streaming. And I ranked them, because why not.
(Sadly, I cannot recommend that you watch [REC], the 2007 Spanish entry that’s probably the masterpiece of the subgenre. The only version available to stream is a very bad English dub and I would not wish that on anyone.)
The details: USA, 2014. Directed by John Erick Dowdle. Available with subscription on Netflix.
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Why watch: Sometimes, all a found-footage film needs is the right setting. This descent into hell (played here by the Paris catacombs) is visually mesmerizing, which makes this movie worth your time even if the scares can be a bit inert and the drama a bit hackneyed. Plus, Perdita Weeks is compulsively watchable as Scarlett, the alchemy student who brings a documentary crew and ex-boyfriend in tow, and the hellish final act is appropriately bizarre and discomfiting.
This is one of those found-footage movies with an impressive sense of scale: You’ve taken a real journey by the final frame.
Try if you like: The Descent. With its narrow passageways and suffocating sense of claustrophobia, the comparison is inevitable.
The details: USA, 2013. Directed by Karl Mueller. Available with subscription on Shudder.
[embedded content]
Why watch: It’s best to go into Mr. Jones knowing as little as possible. Part of the joy of Halloween horror movie season is stumbling upon titles you would never otherwise look for and seeing where they take you. That mindset can only help when watching Mr. Jones, which takes likable characters and distinctly creepy imagery and applies them to a story that becomes quite the head trip. To say much more would spoil the fun.
Try if you like: Unbreakable — but, again, I’m reluctant to elaborate. Let’s just say found footage has a special ability to, in its practical limitations, force filmmakers to be more imaginative.
The details: Canada, 2012. Directed by Christopher MacBride. Available for digital rental on Amazon and iTunes.
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Why watch: This one benefits from a great set-up: What if the man raving about the end of the world outside of Congress was right?
I’m a sucker for any found-footage story that’s framed as “everything went wrong for this documentary crew.” There isn’t much more here than a killer premise and a memorably creepy finale, but that is one beauty of the found-footage genre: These movies often don’t need much more than that to be successful.
Try if you like: Rosemary’s Baby. The occultism is omnipresent, and the movie is less interested in scaring the pants off of you than in constantly nudging you about how near to your own reality this whole scenario seems to be.
The details: USA, 2016. Directed by Phil Guidry, Simon Herbert, and David Whelan. Available with subscription on Amazon Prime.
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Why watch: The most horrifying thing in Savageland might be the dialogue uttered by some of the white, openly racist side characters who populate its mockumentary pastiche.
Say this for the filmmakers: They’re willing to let those characters be as nasty as need be. They don’t pull any punches in this gory tale set in Arizona near the US-Mexican border. Through a narrative not unlike that of Making a Murderer, we learn the story of a Mexican immigrant who might have been wrongly accused of a truly gruesome crime.
This is another small film, made on a self-evidently low budget, that has a big imagination and is bedeviled by tough, urgent political questions.
Try if you like: Get Out. It’s certainly not the scariest film on this list, but, like Jordan Peele’s masterwork, this movie is more interested in making you uncomfortable than making you jump out of your seat.
The details: USA, 2016. Directed by Nigel Bach. Available with subscription on Amazon Prime.
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Why watch: This is a genuine one-man show that might leave you wondering if Nigel Bach just took $1,000 and rented a random house for a weekend. Bach (who receives every notable credit here) plays Tom, a man who thinks he’s buying a house that will make for a quick flip and a tidy profit. But then the furniture starts to move on its own.
As found-footage set-ups go, Tom’s reasons for filming are left a little … vague. But you don’t come to these movies looking for iron-clad logic. And even with no budget to speak of, Bach’s film still got to me, thanks in part to an unforgettable final shot, which has been a staple of the genre since Blair Witch.
Try if you like: The Blair Witch Project. The setting is totally different, but Bad Ben marries a do-it-yourself-attitude with an impeccably realized atmosphere in a way that echoes found footage’s breakout movie.
The details: Canada, 2011. Directed by the Vicious Brothers. Available with subscription on Shudder.
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Why watch: Finally, a little self-awareness: Colin Minihan and Stuart Ortiz, a.k.a. filmmaking duo the Vicious Brothers, effectively spoof those ghost hunter shows that were briefly a hot trend, while still building toward a genuinely suspenseful second half.
A key element of many found-footage films set in one place (which is a lot of them) is geography. Each haunted house or hospital has rooms or hallways — or, in the case of Grave Encounters, tunnels — that start to gain a personality and help build expectations that skilled directors like the Vicious Brothers can then exploit as the audience grows a little too comfortable.
Try if you like: Scream. It’s not taking itself too seriously but there are still solid scares to be found.
The details: USA, 2011. Directed by Henry Joost and Ariel Schulman. Available for digital rent on Amazon and iTunes.
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Why watch: Looking back, it’s honestly impressive that the Paranormal Activity series squeezed three worthwhile movies out of its premise. There was so much potential for this franchise to get stale — and it did, eventually — but it took longer than you’d think.
The mythology really took over as the series went along, and the third film’s exploration of the story’s universe, while turning back the clock a little bit, gives it a fresh feeling and a gloriously gonzo finale. The 1980s, with their flickering, ever-skipping videotapes, are a great period for the found-footage aesthetic.
Try if you like: Any Paranormal Activity movie. This is a series you can jump around in, so if you’ve only seen the first or gave up after the second, this is the franchise at its best.
The details: USA, 2015. Directed by Stephen Cognetti. Available with subscription on Amazon Prime.
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Why watch: Critical to any found-footage movie is the set-up. Why are they filming? Why do they keep filming? Why, for the love of God, do they keep filming?
As set-ups go, Hell House LLC’s is pretty great: A crew of drifters put on haunted houses for money in random towns over the Halloween season. They like to record themselves for the memories and to document their talents in scaring their guests. There’s an implied history that adds some heft to the characters and their relationships.
But as the movie goes on, the haunters become the haunted. Their latest house has a bloody backstory, and, as we learn at the very beginning, something is going to go horribly wrong on Halloween night. But what?
This movie is extremely seasonal in the best way. There are also clowns. I’m not going to say anything else.
Try if you like: It. With its strong sense of place and some seriously scary clowns, Hell House LLC is a nice compendium to last year’s huge horror hit.
The details: USA, 2013. Directed by Blair Erickson. Available for digital rental on Amazon and iTunes.
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Why watch: Your definition of “found footage” might vary, but much of The Banshee Chapter is archival video or in-universe uncovered footage placed within a mockumentary framework. It counts.
It’s also, scare-for-scare, the most frightening film I’ve seen this year. Director Blair Erickson just knows how to craft a terrifying moment, and the film’s backstory of real CIA programs adds to the disquieting ambiance. It’s unsettling throughout, and you’ll yelp at least once.
Try if you like: District 9. Especially in its formatting, the film is reminiscent of that movie’s blend of found footage and conventional moviemaking.
The details: USA, 2017. Directed by Patrick Brice. Available with subscription on Netflix.
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Why watch: The Creep films constitute the only found-footage series that doubles as an enthralling, inexplicable character study. Mark Duplass stars as our killer, Aaron, who is … reflective on his murdering ways. He likes to share. He likes to talk. He even hires random people off the internet just so they can film him talking — for starters, anyway.
The first Creep, released in 2014, is good, but the second, which brings Desiree Akhavan’s Sara in as Duplass’s sparring partner, is even bolder. It’s sort of funny, highly uncomfortable, and totally terrifying in a few sequences.
Try if you like: The Silence of the Lambs. Duplass’s unforgettable performance, combined with his complicated relationship with Sara, a worthy foe, reminds me a lot of the Hannibal Lecter-Clarice Starling classic.
The details: Japan, 2005. Directed by Kôji Shiraishi. Available with subscription on Shudder.
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Why watch: This is the mother of all horror mockumentaries. Whereas many other found-footage movies go small, Noroi runs in the opposite direction, with a speaking cast of well over 25 characters and a nearly two-hour runtime.
The film follows paranormal researcher Masafumi Kobayashi, who embarks on a hellish odyssey while investigating an odd woman, her mysterious son, and some strange deaths. Along the way, we get a taste of everything: Japanese variety shows, classic talking heads, presumably recovered footage from Kobayashi’s own files. It gets very meta when actress Marika Matsumoto shows up playing a possibly possessed version of herself.
Noroi is more interested in building a searing sense of dread than conventional scares, but images from its final reel will still burn into your brain. Shiraishi is maybe the world’s only found-footage auteur (he’s made at least four others over the past decade or so), and Noroi shows all the things he can do with the form.
Try if you like: The Ring. Maybe that’s a bit obvious. But J-horror does have its own distinct mood, so your feelings about the most successful American crossover are probably a good indicator of how much you’ll enjoy Noroi.
The details: USA, 2014. Directed by Adam Robitel. Available for digital rental on YouTube.
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Why watch: A possession movie that starts as a drama about Alzheimer’s disease, The Taking of Deborah Logan offers such a singularly brilliant premise it’s a little baffling that nobody thought of it before.
For this subgenre, The Taking of Deborah Logan stands out as an impressive artistic achievement. It is first and foremost a painfully relatable family melodrama, with affecting performances and fully realized characters. But the terror comes hard and often in a second half that goes off the rails in the best way, when our millennial documentary crew discovers they are filming a very different story than they originally imagined.
Try if you like: Hereditary. Jill Larson and her remarkably malleable physique dominate this movie much the same way Toni Collette owned 2018’s best horror film. Both films successfully plumb issues of mental health and psychology with a demonic motif.
The details: UK, 2013. Directed by Elliot Goldner. Available for digital rental on Amazon and iTunes.
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Why watch: What makes Final Prayer work so well are the relationships: a semi-disgraced ex-priest is joined by a goofy, agnostic cameraman and a mildly authoritarian church official to investigate a demon-haunted church in rural England. The performances are strong and the characters actually get the time to talk about life and reveal themselves a little.
The trio sets up cameras in their house and the church and they wear headsets almost constantly because they’ve been charged by the Vatican with figuring out whether there is any evidence for this alleged haunting. It adds a little authenticity, providing an answer to that ever-present found footage question of why they’re filming and why they keep filming. You get agonizingly still, quiet scenes while waiting for something to move in the sanctuary (a la Paranormal Activity) and more kinetic action when we switch to the characters’ point-of-view.
It’s creepy throughout, without leaning on jump scares. Then, at the end, the story goes in a wildly unexpected direction.
Try if you like: The Exorcist. Final Prayer’s horror incorporates a lot of Catholicism, in a good and thoughtful way.
Original Source -> 13 found-footage horror movies actually worth watching this Halloween
via The Conservative Brief
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