#thank you irl who told me every theory and kept the hope

[mycardinalromance]

#LETS FUCKING GOOOOOO #GREAT DAY TO BE A WOMAN ENJOYER #LESBIANS ARE INDEED STRONGER THAN DEATH ITSELF #WELCOME BACK NOBARA KUGISAKI EVEN IF I NEVER BELIEVED YOU WERE GONE

[away-ward]

im sorry for this rant KO, but why on earth is the bonus content for nightfall is the start of the horsemen? Like omfg. I really dont need it to exist because i like the mystery of them. Why can't we just have a willemmy bonus 😭 i'm so fucking upset. I initially wanted to pre-order the paperback but thinking about that whole alex drama in BC, i didn't, thank the lord for that! But i was still hoping for a willemmy bonus or maybe a will or emmy's back story, but we're getting to see Damon, A-FUCKING-GAIN? How many fucking bonus do we have to see him??! Fuck, i'm so upset, idk who to rant this with because i don't talk about this series to anybody irl.

Excerpt from PD's insta:

DAMON GRABS HIS JACKET OFF THE COURT AND PULLS IT ON AS HE LEAVES.

"YOU OKAY?" MICHAEL ASKS KAI.

BUT KAI JUST GESTURES TO DAMON WHO PUSHES THROUGH THE HEAVY DOUBLE DOORS. "I TOLD YOU, MAN," HE BLURTS OUT TO MICHAEL. "HE'S TROUBLE."

"NO," MICHAEL QUICKLY RETORTS, LOOKING IN THE DIRECTION DAMON LEFT. "HE'S AN ENFORCER, KAI."

HIS FRIEND STARES AT HIM.

"AND EVERY TEAM NEEDS ONE," MICHAEL ADDS, DROPPING THE BASKETBALL INTO KAI'S HANDS. "TELL THE COACH I'LL BE RIGHT BACK."

end-

🥲 ngl, i'm so sick of damon's appearance, at this point not only his character wasn't my fav, pd over-pushing him makes me really hate him now. "He's the enforcer" ughhhh, and when did this branding ever came up in the devil's night series? I only remember this point being discussed here on your blog of your meta about damon's character and his implicit role in their friend group and family. Istg i really never saw his role being discussed and branded like this anywhere, so the only place it could happen was in the private chat's of their pendragon fb group or between PD and their editor/most trusted beta readers. Istg the pettier side of me feels like some of PD's fb group fans saw your discussion posts here with other anons and told on PD, then they got inspired by you ideas about "his role" in the family. Which in theory, i don't see much wrong from it, but truly, where did this role establishment and branding came from? And ofc in PD's fashion, they had to rebrand Damon's role to be positive and borderline inspiring 🙄

and fuck, who cares about logic right? Definitely not PD when they kept on writing A and meaning B in their stories, but kept on being pissed off when readers understood it as A. 🤡

at this point, i'm not even excited anymore for this bonus content. I genuinely thought something good will come out of it, but with their opinion of willemmy a few weeks ago, and now with this. Idk. But I just know and fully sure now that PD just wanted to avoid the alex-aydin-will-emmy qna discussion extra materials, because they knew they fucked that one up, and many readers hated it, and so they probably want to just bury that shit and move past it. So of course, we'll never gonna get a willemmy bonus content. Ugh. I can't fault them for wanting to move on, but for someone who wnats to move on so bad and ignore the uncomfy parts of their own mistake in writing, they sure as hell is still be talking and hinting at this series from time to time especially for their most fav characters 🙄

but fr KO, it really left a sour taste in my mouth when an author behaves like this. Penelope Douglas is just so, ugh, idk. At this point ideky i'm still hoping for them to be better tbh when they've always been known to be problematic, like they're always just so disappointing. I need to detach my feelings for books i like to read with their authors, because i'm just gonna end up upset like this. But it's so hard!!! Especially when they're indies and you like some parts of the things they put out, and can't always find it anywhere else. Ughhh. i heard that series by Monty Jay was giving DN, so i might check it out, and i really hope it's better.

+ when you get a reach of the bonus materials, will you be sharing them here and share your thoughts and opinions about them? I'm a big yapper and i just wanna yap with somebody about it frfr.

Hey. Oh man, I feel your pain.

I really dont need it to exist because i like the mystery of them. Why can't we just have a willemmy bonus

Ohh, I wish I was with you on this but I’m actually excited about it. As someone who wants to understand these characters better, and who absolutely goes bonkers over character origin stories, this is right up my alley. I never expected any kind of Willemmy scene, so maybe I’m not as disappointed as I would be otherwise.

From what I heard, there are some willemmy scenes in this origin story though! So not all hope is lost (although I don’t know how it’s supposed to make sense, since I’ve also heard that this starts during their freshmen year and Emmy’s a year younger so… but whatever. I’m just happy for the moments!)

I am so sorry that this isn’t what you wanted!

Istg the pettier side of me feels like some of PD's fb group fans saw your discussion posts here with other anons and told on PD, then they got inspired by you ideas about "his role" in the family. Which in theory, i don't see much wrong from it, but truly, where did this role establishment and branding came from?

As much as this idea tickles me, the fact is that this was probably written months ago, and I only really had that discussion with in the past few weeks. More than likely, we were just picking up on something PD was implying the entire time.

But I just know and fully sure now that PD just wanted to avoid the alex-aydin-will-emmy qna discussion extra materials, because they knew they fucked that one up, and many readers hated it, and so they probably want to just bury that shit and move past it.

I’m still holding out of that pinterest board and discussion questions (though, it may be a lost cause). It just seems so stupid that they’d withhold those two things since they’re so minor compared to the bonus scene.

they sure as hell is still be talking and hinting at this series from time to time especially for their most fav characters

Coming from a writer’s perspective, it’s hard to let your favs go. Long after the other characters stop “speaking” to you, your favs come back. You still see them doing stuff. And PD is proud of the series, so of course they’re not going to bury it.

But yes, I agree that the fandom has been pretty loud about wanting some more willemmy content for some closure, and it shouldn’t be this hard to sit and think about the characters and deliver something, just to be kind to your readers and fans. I can’t say why PD is so resistant to it, but that’s for them to know.

i heard that series by Monty Jay was giving DN, so i might check it out, and i really hope it's better.

I had to look it up, and I’m assuming you’re speaking about the hollow boys? I haven’t read it, but if you do get around to it, I hope you enjoy it.

Regarding PD, I hardly ever look into the background of an author or give them a second thought. I also have never had the desire to contact an author, or do meet and greets or anything, that’s just me. So, I’ve never had the issue of needing to detach a work from an author, but I can see the struggle.

+ when you get a reach of the bonus materials, will you be sharing them here and share your thoughts and opinions about them? I'm a big yapper and i just wanna yap with somebody about it frfr.

I absolutely will share my thoughts, of course! I might do a reading react, or just a summary of my thoughts, whatever feels right. Again, I feel for your frustration and disappointment. The let down is never easy, but you'll read better books in the future. This isn't the last of it for you. So look forward to finding your next favorite read.

-KO

[krakenbait]

kraken bait 3: the moment of truth

the moment is finally upon us! no, not the actual expansion draft, that’s in 10 days. i mean my last (but best) installment of the kraken bait expansion draft theories! 

this has been a long, long work in progress, basically since i posted the last one. i’ve asked nearly every hockey fan i know, as well as randomly messaging several friends and cool people on hockeyblr, for their ideas and opinions on their favorite team’s expansion draft situation. and as with my previous lists, i had my friend and capfriendly consultant corwin (@chaos-hockey) collaborating with me to make this semi-reasonable (largely against their wishes). i’ll be including commentary from myself and my variety of sources with each pick. 

for reference, this is a somewhat plausible look at who seattle might take in the expansion draft. it’s not a prediction, because even i don’t honestly think the kraken will take some of these players, but it’s a fun simulation. it does follow expansion draft rules, and even comes under the cap (which took some last-minute finagling by me and corwin).

without further ado, let’s get into it! this list got long, so it’s all under the cut.

Anaheim Ducks: Haydn Fleury

this one comes straight from resident danton heinen fan, ergo ducks fan @dantonheinens, so thanks for your help casey! they sent me a very detailed explanation of anaheim’s expansion draft situation basically explaining that there’s a whole lot of “ands, ifs, or buts” with the ducks, but if fleury is exposed, he’s a slam dunk (slam duck? i’m sorry)

Arizona Coyotes: Christian Fischer

the one thing i know about this dude is he got wrecked in a fight with nathan mackinnon in the 2020 playoffs. this is the first of several picks on this list i borrowed from The Athletic’s mock expansion drafts, which happens if i don’t know the team and i don’t know anyone else who does. corwin and i also considered taking adin hill from the yotes, but we decided on some other goalies instead (stay tuned).

Boston Bruins: Jeremy Lauzon

i have a lot of friends who are bruins fans, so credits are owed to: corwin, casey again, alex (@patron-saint-of-boston-hockey) & luna (@kureally) & any other bruins fans in the nwhl discord, and my irl bruins friends. i got a lot of opinions on the bruins pick, including jake debrusk, jakub zboril, connor clifton, and trent frederic. but the one name almost everyone could agree on was lauzon. therefore, i’ve decided he’s headed to seattle. 

(it feels worth it to mention that at the prospect of having to take someone from the bruins, corwin said “curses be upon your name!” in an aggressively thick boston accent)

Buffalo Sabres: Rasmus Asplund

i could not tell you who this is, other than the fact that he’s one of buffalo’s three rasmuses (rasmi?). corwin and i had also talked about maybe putting anders bjork here, like i did in the last go-around, but i defaulted to The Athletic this time, and they thought asplund was a good pick, so here we are.

Calgary Flames: Mark Giordano

another pick borrowed from The Athletic, but i’ve seen predictions of giordano to the kraken a fair amount. it just seems right (and a whole lot better than corwin’s proposition of matthew tkachuk from last round).

Carolina Hurricanes: Brady Skjei

this one comes from the lovely @summerteukka, so thank you kinga! she gave me a very good rundown on the canes and the expansion draft, with the conclusion being the canes have so much defensive depth that it’s definitely going to be a defenseman, and especially if they resign dougie hamilton, skjei seems to be a likely choice. i’m all for it- we’ll have “an S and a K and a J all next to each other” on a kraken jersey.

Chicago: Adam Gaudette

similarly to the arizona pick, corwin and i considered a goalie here- in this case, it would have been malcolm subban. but he is not one of the goalies we ended up going for. instead, we opted on bringing micaela gaudette and her husband back to the pacific northwest. 

Colorado Avalanche: Ryan Graves

this is really a no-brainer. gravy is a good defenseman, but the avs have such a strong defense between cale makar, devon toews, and sam girard (and you could add erik johnson when he’s healthy), plus up-and-comers like bo byram. gravy will almost definitely be exposed, and i think he’s a great pick for seattle. plus it’s relatively painless for avs fans who also will like seattle (like yours truly).

(corwin also wanted me to mention that they want gravy traded to the bruins so he can play with curtis hall, who is basically “color-swapped ryan graves”)

Columbus Blue Jackets: Dean Kukan

another pick taken right from The Athletic. i do not know who this is, but he’s a defenseman and the writers liked this pick so i went with it. for the record, corwin really wanted this pick to be boone jenner because he has a funky name, but i wanted another defenseman, so the fun name was sacrificed for function.

Dallas Stars: Jason Dickinson

i don’t really have an explanation for this one. corwin and i were talking about the stars options and picking dickinson just felt right.

Detroit Red Wings: Vladislav Namestnikov

thanks are owed here to joce (@doubleminor) for her red wings expertise! she gave me a few players who were likely kraken bait and i picked from there. it came down to evgeny svechnikov and vladislav namestnikov, but i went with namestnikov in the end. he was with the avs for a brief period and i liked him then, plus the vibes just seem right, so here we are.

Edmonton Oilers: Tyson Barrie

really, tyson barrie was the player who started the whole kraken bait thing. corwin made the drawing, i made the first list, and the rest is history. do i actually think tyson will be going to the kraken in a week? not really. do i still really like the idea of it? 100%. therefore, i will continue to engage in my “tyson barrie to seattle” nonsense.

Florida Panthers: Chris Driedger

oh look, our first goalie! florida had some interesting skater options, but when it came down to it, corwin and i thought the cats were a good place to take a goalie from. driedger did pretty well this season, plus the panthers’ goalie situation is locked up between $10 million man bobrovsky and future star spencer knight.

Los Angeles Kings: Viktor Arvidsson

corwin was feeling pretty strong about this one, so i’m trusting their judgement. according to them, seattle expressed interest in arvidsson, so nashville traded him to the kings instead of giving him up for nothing. now the kings get to give him up for nothing, which works out pretty well, considering i had absolutely no clue who to pick from the kings. 

Minnesota Wild: Matt Dumba

like some other picks, this just seems right. i like matt dumba a lot. he seems like a fun and wholesome guy, and his activism, both on his own and with the hockey diversity alliance, is admirable. i hope he gets to display his personality and keep working to better the sport of hockey with the kraken.

Montreal Canadiens: Jake Allen

goalie number two! picking a player from the habs was weird because i got attached to them during the playoffs, but i really don’t know many of their players? so corwin and i deliberated on this a little, and after looking at our goalie situation, decided that allen was the right pick from montreal. 

Nashville Predators: Calle Jarnkrok

after doing art for and getting a featured article from the preds, corwin thinks they’re some kind of nashville expert. i originally had matt duchene here, but corwin said not him. their logic? they did art of duchene for their preds project, so they probably want to keep him around. fair point. so we went with calle jarnkrok. the logic behind that choice was simple: “calle jarn-kraken”

New Jersey Devils: Andreas Johnsson

i wish i kept a counter of how many times corwin told me “ron francis doesn’t care about your feelings!” when we were discussing the devils pick. they kept advocating for either nate bastian or mikey mcleod, but i would not stand for the superbuddies being separated. this is my kraken bait list, so my decisions. i asked a few of my devils friends for their input (props to sabs @jakejuentzel and h @bigmouthnatebastian), and in between the mild panic, andreas johnsson got tossed out. therefore, it’s mango getting shipped to seattle. does it further lower the average age of the devils? yeah, but it’ll be fine! the nhl could use some youthful chaos.

New York Islanders: Jordan Eberle

all of my kraken bait ideas for the isles came from the bardown breakdown podcast (a great listen if you like hockey and pop-punk/punk music!), since both hosts are isles fans. they had a few names tossed out, including josh bailey and casey cizikas, but corwin and i decided on eberle. like with a lot of these, right vibes.

New York Rangers: Kevin Rooney

i’ve seen two names pretty consistently for rangers kraken bait: colin blackwell and kevin rooney. is blackwell is better and therefore the more likely pick? yes. but kevin rooney is a former devil and also mocked tom wilson, so i voted he gets to go seattle.

Ottawa Senators: Chris Tierney

i don’t think i could name more than three, maybe four players on the sens, so i defaulted to The Athletic on this one. i have no idea who chris tierney is, but it works, so there we go.

Philadelphia Flyers: James Van Riemsdyk

@phillyjoel left some fantastic notes on the flyers kraken bait in the tags of my last list, giving me good evidence to tell corwin that for the last time, nolan patrick is not kraken bait. the argument i saw was that the flyers are probably going to trade patrick instead of giving him up for nothing and make cap space by giving away van riemsdyk or voracek. The Athletic liked the van riemsdyk pick, and corwin could live with it, so that’s where we settled.

Pittsburgh Penguins: Zach Aston-Reese

i honestly don’t have a whole lot of explanation for this one. another pick borrowed from The Athletic, corwin and i liked it, there we go. we considered going with kris letang, but the vibes weren’t right.

San Jose Sharks: Ryan Donato

shoutout to my sharks friend and amazing artist K (@18minutemajor) for their help! i originally had brent burns in this slot, on K’s suggestion (we had a fantastic exchange about brent burns befriending bigfoot). however, i ran into last-minute cap trouble and had to switch the pick. ryan donato came from The Athletic, but i think it’s kind of a fun pick. he’s been passed between a few teams recently, but most of what i know of ryan donato comes from the 2018 olympics (aka the first time i really watched hockey!), when he was apparently doing pretty well for team usa. 

St. Louis Blues: Vince Dunn

thank you @powerblais (and the blues fans group chat) for your input on this one! vince dunn was one of the names on the list erin sent me, and The Athletic also had him listed, so we went with it. 

Tampa Bay Lightning: Blake Coleman

thanks @heddy for responding to my out-of-the-blue message with some good input on the bolts! ana gave me some good suggestions like tyler johnson plus something else so they take on the contract, alex killorn, and ondrej palat. in the end, this devils fan defaulted to pickles. this pick is in the same category as tyson barrie- do i actually think coleman is going to the kraken? not really. do i still like the idea? absolutely.

Toronto Maple Leafs: Travis Dermott

borrowed from The Athletic and some other kraken bait predictions, because everyone has something to say about the leafs. corwin and i waffled between dermott and alexander kerfoot for this pick, but we eventually settled on dermott to seattle.

Vancouver Canucks: Madison Bowey

this pick changed so much in just one day. we originally had braden holtby here because original kraken bait, but then i ran into cap trouble. so i switched it to zack macewen, following a pick by The Athletic. but then i wanted one or two more defensemen, so i switched to madison bowey, who was the other pick from The Athletic. after all that, it seems like the right pick.

Washington Capitals: Vitek Vanecek

our third and final goalie! corwin and i had our eyes on vanecek as kraken bait for a while- a young goalie with promise and room to improve seemed like the right pick for seattle. we briefly considered tj oshie--he’s from washington state, and corwin wanted to upset caps fans (we were talking during the first round of the playoffs)--but ended up back with vanecek as our pick.

Winnipeg Jets: Mason Appleton

last pick of the list! not much to say here, though. it’s a pick borrowed from The Athletic, but we went with him over the other option from the jets because he has a fun name. to quote corwin, mason appleton sounds like “an apple pie in a mason jar on skates.”

and there you have it folks, the final kraken bait list! if you want to know the specifics, we’ve got 3 goalies, 16 forwards, and 11 defensemen, and the total cap hit is 76.4M. i’m pretty doubtful that this will be the actual expansion draft lineup, but we’ll have to see how many, if any, picks corwin and i got right. 

thanks again to everyone who helped me out, and i hope you enjoyed the chaos and commentary of the kraken bait lists!

[aspenflower17]

Finding You (Part 17 of ??)

Hello everyone! Thank you all for being so patient! I had pretty bad writers block and couldn’t figure out where I wanted the story to go from the last chapter. I was also dealing with some irl problems as well. It seems like a lot of creators were having the same problems though January and February though. Hopefully March will make everything smooth out! I think I figured out where to go from here (I have the end all planned out, but getting there without ruining the pacing is what’s been giving me problems). I appreciate everyone’s patience while I figured things out, and hopefully I can get back on a normalized schedule!

Anywho, if you’re new to this story and would like to start at the beginning, here’s the link to part 1. Every chapter should have a link to the next part at the end, so hopefully you decide to read it all :D

Tags <3 : @simpingforsatan @naimena @hachimochi @wrathandgreed @magi-minminxiii @rensphilia @a-dream-at-night @chloelikesobeyme @getbehindme-satan @theuglypugling @oofthelazyweeb @mammonismyfirstman (I’m not great about putting this on every chapter, but if you want to be added to the tags list, just comment below asking to be added (I don’t want to assume everyone commenting wants a tag so just make sure to mention tag in the comment) or you can send me a DM :) Also, I just went through all the chapters so far and I think I have everyone. If I missed you just remind me and I’ll put you in!)

Word Count: 2566

TW: some angst relating to last chapter but that’s about it

Satan sat in his room, contemplating whether telling Mc about Michael was a good idea or not. It’d been a couple days since she’d come over and he hadn’t heard anything from her. It was worrying him more than he wanted to admit, but he knew from spending a lot of time with her as a human, it would be a better idea for him to leave her alone until she was ready to talk to him. From the way she speaks about him, it’s pretty clear their relationship is a bit strained. Actually, it reminds me a bit of me and Lucifer, though with obvious differences. 

While the Avatar of Wrath would never admit it aloud, he did have a kind of respect for Lucifer. It took a different form than anyone else’s mostly because he knew him. All of him. Flaws, strengths, weaknesses, secrets. Well, at least up until his birth. He’d had no idea about Lilith and what Lucifer had done. Lucifer had definitely changed a lot since the Fall, but Satan could generally figure out what he was thinking or how he was going to respond to a situation. So, what was going on with Mc and Michael?

Obviously he didn’t want her talking with him at least. There was probably some fear she’d fall, taking the path of her ancestor but for a being in the Devildom. He couldn’t see any war resulting from her Falling. It would be from her own choice, with no forbidden fruit or humans involved. He was pretty sure Michael didn’t feel anything romantic for her, so it probably wasn’t anything involved in wanting her to stay for him. So why?

He was pulled from his thoughts by his DDD ringing. Hoping it was Mc, he answered by the second ring, “Hello?”

“Congratulations! You’ve won an-” Satan growled and hung up. Stupid solicitor.

There was a knock at his door, “Yo Satan. I got somethin’ for ya’,” Satan sighed, but got up to answer the door. Pulling it open, he saw Mammon and Mc on the other side, “Said she wanted ta talk ta ya. It sounded urgent so…” Mammon smiled a bit apologetically.

“That’s quite alright. Mc, hello. How lovely to see you. Do you want to come in?”

“I’d appreciate that. Thank you,” Mc entered his room as Satan shot daggers through his eyes at Mammon.

“A little warning next time would be nice.”

“Oi! If ya hadn’t been so… gloomy lately maybe I wouldn’t have been so worried- No, ya should just be grateful to the Great Mammon. I’m not an errand boy ya know,” and with that, Mammon stalked off down the hallway.

Satan rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything back. He understood Mammon was just trying to help him, “Well, it’s nice to see you Mc. How… Are you okay?” Mc was turning slowly, looking at his room in awe. He would’ve just figured she was simply impressed by his room like she had been the other first time she’d seen it, but she looked rattled.

“Oh! I was just… Umm… Your collection is really impressive,” she deflected his question, smiling. The unease remained in her eyes though.

“Yes. This is my personal collection,” Satan answered, leaving his question unanswered.

“It’s quite… impressive,” as she turned, Satan caught her frown again. Does she not like how messy it is?

“Though they’re not all on shelves, I make sure they’re all kept in good shape. I honestly just don’t have enough wall space or bookshelves for them all.”

“Oh… I understand. I tend to get book piles too,” Mc answered, a bit caught off guard. 

So it’s not the mess. What could it be?

“So, what are you doing here? Not that I’m not happy to see you. I just haven’t heard from you for a couple days.”

“I’m sorry about that and just showing up out of the blue like this. I had a lot to think about after… last time, and some things to research. Then inspiration randomly struck for my next art show. Not to mention, Michael’s been keeping a close eye on me ever since he blew up. I wanted to see you, and I didn’t even think to message you first. I’m sorry about that.”

Satan was at a loss for words. She wanted to come see me. She wanted to see me so much, she just showed up. I should really say something to her right now, but I’m not sure what to say.

“You’re not angry with me, are you?” Mc turned back to him, looking worried.

“Of course not. I was afraid you were possibly upset with me, and Lucifer I suppose, for what we told you. I know hearing something like that must be hard.”

Mc smiled, “Well, that’s good to know. As to what you told me… I do trust you guys. More so than I trust most of the other angels in fact… But you are demons and what you told me was… Anyway, I was researching what you told me to see if I could corroborate your story and I did find a couple different mentions of Lilith, one of which told of a connection between her and the fruit. I couldn’t prove or disprove the claims that he… That he was the one that shot her, but with how defensive he immediately got after I mentioned seven angels falling instead of six… I… I can’t bring myself to believe he’d do something that terrible yet, but I do believe you guys on everything else, and… it’s not beyond the realm of possibility. In any case, the Celestial Realm definitely covered up much of the war, including its causes. I had a suspicion when I originally learned about it, but figured it was all just in my head,” Mc looked Satan straight in the eyes, “I want to thank you for being honest with me.”

“How are you so sure we didn’t lie to you? Like you said, we are demons.”

“Call it a hunch,” Mc smiled, “Anyway, I really appreciate it, and I wanted you to have this,” she handed him a very lifelike drawing, “I thought you might like cats, so I frew my favorite one from the Celestial Realm.”

Satan couldn’t believe his eyes, “Leo?”

“Huh?”

“That’s Leo. I… half adopted him a while ago.”

“How can you tell?”

“Well, he’s got hearts all over him right? The one on his forehead and chest are the most prominent, but there’s a couple more on his back and stomach right? Hold on. I have a couple photos here,” and Satan went rustling through a drawer. It was hard to find a photo of him without Mc, but he knew there were some. Leo was a cat that he and Mc had adopted together. She’d used all her charm and reasoning skills to get Lucifer to agree to allowing a cat in the house. She had promised him it would only be the one cat, though they secretly were planning on getting another once Leo passed. They unfortunately didn’t get the chance to see that happen, as Mc passed away before Leo did. Lucifer had allowed Satan to keep the cat as a way to cope with Mc’s death. He listened to me! I told him to go find his Mom once he left me, and he did! I’m so happy!

He finally found a good picture to show Mc, “See? Same cat.”

“Oh my! You’re right! That’s incredible!”

“So, you said he was your favorite?”

“Yeah. Because of how transient most cats are, they don’t spend long in the Celestial Realm. He may not spend a lot of time with me, but I do see him around a lot, and he has comforted me before. A lot of the other angels think he was a pet of mine from my human life, and that's why he sticks around.”

“Well, who wouldn’t want to stay with you?”

Mc looked up at Satan, “You really think that?”

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“You didn’t even know me then. What if I was boring or really dumb in the human realm?”

Satan slapped himself internally for not being more careful, “I highly doubt you were either of those two things. I know when people come down here, they don’t lose any of their personality.”

“Really?”

“Yup. It makes the whole process of breaking them so much more entertaining,” seeing Mc’s worried expression, he cleared his throat and moved on, “With that line of thinking, angels would be the same way. Your placement was just decided by how good you were in life.”

“What if I was a Wanderer though?”

Satan sucked in a breath at that. She had been a Wanderer? There was a chance she could have ended up here with him?

“There’s a lot of theories on why someone might Wander. None of them are conclusive though. I wouldn’t worry too much about it if I were you.”

“Satan?”

“Yes?”

“When the time comes, will you answer my questions?” Mc didn’t look at Satan, but he had the feeling this was an extremely important question.

“Of course I will.”

Satan watched some tension leave Mc’s body, as she turned to him and smiled sincerely, “Thank you.”

“Well, of course. That’s assuming I can answer them.”

“I have a feeling you’ll be able to,” she answered cryptically.

“Very well then. Since you’re here, would you like to stay and read? Or we can go somewhere if you’d like,” she turned to him, and he couldn’t help the words that fell from his lips, “I just want to spend some time with you.”

Mc looked a bit shocked, but then she smiled softly, “I’d really like that.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They decided on reading, but not before they went downstairs to grab some snacks. As predicted, Beel was there as well.

“Hey Mc,” Beel grinned, his feast not yet begun.

“Hi Beelze… Actually, is it alright if I call you Beel?”

“Huh? Why wouldn’t it be okay?” Beel cocked his head to the side in confusion.

“It’s just… I don’t know you very well, so I didn’t know if it was alright. Plus, they always refer to you as Beelzebub in the Celestial Realm.”

“Wait… Do they talk about us up in the Celestial Realm?”

“Not a lot, but when speaking about our history they do talk about you all, especially Lucifer.”

“What do they say about me?” Beel had grabbed his wrist.

“Yeah, what do they say about us? I wanna know,” Belphie’s head popped out from underneath the table, making Mc yelp a little and grabbed onto Satan’s arm. His hand automatically covered hers, a reflex from when she had been a human.

“Oh yeah. Belphie’s here too,” Beel added happily, watching the angel and his brother.

Belphie smirked, eyes on their arms, “So, what do they say about us?”

“You give me a near heart attack and then carry on like nothing happened?” Mc asked, a bit embarrassed.

“Your fault for not looking,” Belphie grunted, looking at Satan who was nearly frozen in place, his eyes focused on the point of contact, “You woke me up so maybe you should be apologizing to me.”

“Belphie, don’t be mean. You were hiding weren’t you?” Beel asked.

“Well, yeah, but that’s not the point. And how long are you going to keep clinging to my brother like that? I know he’s stronger than me, but I’m not going to hurt you.”

Mc looked to see she was still grabbing Satan’s arm, “Eep! S-Sorry! I didn’t realize,” she removed herself and took a step away, face burning.

“That’s quite alright Mc,” Satan managed to get out.

“So, what’d you guys come down here for?” Beel asked, frowning a bit at Belphie.

“Ah, right. Snacks. We came down for snacks,” Mc said quickly, face still flushed.

“I can help with that,” Beel said, “Come over here Mc and I’ll help you pick food out.” By the time their snacks were decided, both Mc and Satan had to carry them up to his room.

“We have way too many snacks,” Satan observed, “I’ll still have some in my room a month from now.”

“Awww, come on you guys! I went down to resupply early to avoid Beel taking everything, but it was really you two I needed to watch out for?”

“He was already there when we went down. He sent us back with all this,” Satan answered, not really wanting to deal with Levi at the moment. The twins had already taken up enough valuable reading time as it was.

“Of course he would. He never thinks about me when he cleans out the fridge. It’s not like it’s easy for me to just leave the house to go get something, but no one ever thinks about me. It’s probably because I’m a-”

“Oh, do you want these then?” Mc cut him off, extending her full arms.

“Wha…? You’re giving these to me?”

“Sure. Why not?” Mc smiled at him.

Levi’s eyes went wide and his lower lip quivered a bit, “You’re so kind. You’re truly an angel now.”

“Because I wasn’t before?” Mc chuckled.

Levi’s eyes got even wider and he looked down, “W-Well, I-I… Just… Thank you for the food. I think I need to go back to my room now!”

“Oh, sure. Here you go,” the snacks were handed off, Levi only dropping 3 in his haste, and then he was walking as quickly as he could down the hallway towards his room.

“That was weird,” Mc commented, watching him hurry down the hallway.

“He’s weird,” Satan sighed, extremely grumpy that Levi not only interrupted them but then said something so thoughtless, “Don’t worry about him.”

“Sure,” Mc replied, though he was sure she was still wondering about it.

“Let’s just get to my room before we’re interrupted by anyone else.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Satan closed his book and stretched, enjoying the increase in blood flow throughout his body, “How are you enjoying- Oh,” Mc, who he had given the bed to, the place she had read before they would read cuddled together, was asleep. She was breathing deeply, book still clutched in her hand.

Chuckling, Satan padded over to the bed, and pulled a blanket over her. Coincidentally, it was one she had given him. She had been convinced it was the best blanket for reading ever. He had put a perseverance spell on it so it never got worn past where it was comfortable. Now that he had it for a long time, he found himself agreeing with her.

He allowed himself a moment to admire her sleeping form, the muntins in his window throwing a line across her face. She adjusted in her sleep, pulling the blanket closer. She smiled sleepily, murmuring something that almost sounded like his name. She truly is just as beautiful as before she left that last time. The last time I ever saw her alive…

His hand caressed her jaw line before he knew what he was doing, “I’ll never lose you again. For as long as you’ll allow me in your life, I’ll be here. I promise you that,” he whispered, leaning down and lightly pressing his lips to her forehead.

She stirred at the contact, eyes opening sleepily and focusing on him, “Mnh, Satan?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As always, likes, comments and reblogs are always welcome! Until next time!

[stormquill]

mahpiohanzia | chapter three [Remus Lupin/Reader]

You are an Animagus-in-training nearing the end of your education. He is Generic Defence Against the Dark Arts Teacher Replacement #7. Your final year at Hogwarts couldn’t possibly be any stranger than the previous six...but seven is one of the most powerful numbers in magic, after all.

Author’s Notes: Co-written by Andrew. Follow the blog @mahpiohanzia.

Notes: sorry for the lateness, I was much busier irl than I expected! I hope you had a wonderful holiday.

The most unexpected side-effect of carrying a Mandrake leaf in your mouth was the way it poisoned every swallow with bitterness.

Each sip of drink, every bite of food was tainted with a medicinal acridity that made your nose twitch and sent a shiver down your spine. You quickly made the transition to the plainest foods possible to prevent yourself from developing aversions, and six days into the endeavour, all you wanted to do was remember what non-Mandrake-laced roasted chicken tasted like.

The second most unexpected side-effect was how hard it was not to play around with it. With McGonagall’s approval, you’d used a Sticking Charm to keep the leaf affixed to the roof of your mouth, but you kept finding yourself tonguing idly at the thing, like a mouth wound you just couldn’t leave alone. Though the charm had to be reapplied multiple times throughout the day, it worked well to prevent accidents, especially while eating and sleeping.

With your mouth full of Mandrake and your gut constantly swirling with quarts of bitter saliva, you didn’t speak much for the remainder of September.

Snape and McGonagall, the only professors of yours who knew of your Animagus training, didn’t give you any preferential treatment, but at least extended you the courtesy of not asking you direct questions in-class. McGonagall only called on you when it was your turn to cast spells, which were performed non-verbally, while Snape took the simple approach of pretending you didn’t exist.

Flitwick and Vector were more difficult to handle. On the occasion you were called upon for an explanation, you kept your answers short and to the point, as your every other syllable was softened by a heavy lisp you clearly didn’t have before.

Not speaking in Lupin’s class, however, proved to be the biggest challenge.

You were studying advanced theory that month, starting with a thorough review of all offensive and defensive spells you’d learned since year one. The bizarre focus on wand movements would’ve been tedious under any other professor’s instruction, but Lupin had a way of making the most mundane of subjects fascinating; you were convinced he could’ve read the dictionary aloud and still had his class hanging onto every word.

Yet, Lupin encouraged class discussions more than any other teacher--the more you tried to keep to yourself, the more he’d pick on you for answers. You were sure he thought your reservedness was residual shyness from the Shield Charm incident earlier that month--a thought which only frustrated you even more, as you wanted to contribute--but every class, you were forced to choose between pretending not to know the answer, and speaking with a new speech impediment.

You didn’t want to answer any intrusive questions about it, and you certainly didn’t want to risk the leaf falling out, losing all your progress for the sake of engaging in some class discussions.

Idle thoughts of your next Defence Against the Dark Arts class distracted you during Potions one day, almost enough for you to miscount the rat spleens you added to your cauldron--but as you brought a stoppered vial of Shrinking Solution to the front after class, Snape jolted you from your anxious reverie by calling your last name.

“Wednesday,” he said, once again not bothering to make eye contact as he spoke. “Astronomy Tower. Eight o’clock.”

And just like that, your month was up.

-

Bzzt.

Your enchanted watch gave you a jolt, marking 7:45pm on the night of October 6th.

You were already here.

As the Astronomy Tower was off-limits outside of class time, you hadn’t stepped foot in this place since your finals in fifth year. The tower was just as you remembered it, though, with the familiar wooden floors creaking beneath your feet, and the massive floating gyroscopes rotating silently in the middle of the room. Open stone arches made the tower a bird’s nest, granting a breathtaking 360 degree view of the grounds below and the sky above. The stars were not yet at their brightest, and the pitch-black sky was broken only by the pale glow of the full moon.

You leaned against a railing. The scent of night autumn air was intoxicating--clean and cold and vaguely nostalgic. A stray intrusive thought urged you to jump.

“Clear skies,” said a dull voice behind you. “How fortunate.”

(How was he so damn quiet?)

“Good evening, Professor.”

Snape swept to your side, beneath the open archway with the best view of the moon, and offered up a crystal phial without looking at you. You accepted it. At this point, you didn’t need to exchange words--if you hadn’t memorized these steps by now, you had no right being here.

Holding the phial directly under the moonlight, you finally, finally removed the cursed leaf from your mouth, now dripping with spit, and slid it into the phial, careful not to get anything gross outside the lip of the bottle. You plucked a single one of your hairs from the root, adding it in as well. Snape pulled a second small bottle and a silver teaspoon from the inside of his cloak, measuring out a clear liquid onto the utensil before tipping it into your phial.

Reaching back into his pocket, Snape pulled out a dark, pod-like object and held it up between his fingers. Under the low light, the size and shape of it sort of reminded you of a Licorice Snap.

You offered your phial, but he shifted his arm away from you, as if he were playing keep-away with a child.

You realized he was making eye contact, now. You were not to take his next words lightly.

“The ingredients needed to create this potion are notoriously difficult to obtain,” he said, slowly. “Keep that in mind before doing anything that would warrant asking me for a second chance.”

You blinked.

The incantation. He must’ve meant the incantation.

From tomorrow morning until the next thunderstorm, you would need to recite a very specific spell, every sunrise and sunset. Failure to do so even once would mean having to get a fresh Mandrake leaf and starting the entire process over again.

That was why keeping time was so important this year.

You would charm your watch tonight to give you a five-minute warning before every sunrise and sunset. You would add bone conduction to the enchantment, if you had to, which would rattle you to your core any time the alarm went off. You would have to be incapacitated or dead to miss the alerts, and either fate would be through no deliberate doing of your own.

“I understand, sir.”

Still staring at you, unblinking, Snape took the crystal phial from you and plunked the moth chrysalis inside, before slipping the concoction into an inner pocket of his robes.

He turned his heel and strode away. “You are not to leave school grounds until the ritual is complete.”

“Yes, sir,” you called at his back. “Thank you for your help.”

“Don’t disappoint me,” came his reply, as he descended the steps of the Astronomy Tower.

-

On Monday afternoon, Lupin limped into the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom with a cane in his hand and colour in his cheeks, seeming much lighter and brighter than the exhausted wreck of a man who’d instructed you the previous Wednesday, if not somehow more disheveled.

“Good afternoon, class!” he said, cheerfully.

‘Good afternoon,’ chimed the room.

“We missed you on Friday, Professor,” said a girl in the front row. “Are you quite alright?”

“Ah, yes--thank you for your concern, Miss Perrot.” He rested his cane against the side of his desk, and began unpacking his briefcase. “I should’ve told you all sooner so it didn’t come as such a surprise. I deal with a...chronic illness, though I’m sure you couldn’t tell just by looking at me.” (A sympathetic laugh from the room.) “On the occasion I am too unwell to teach, Professor Snape has kindly agreed to substitute. Now,” he added lightly, facing the class, “how did he do?”

Silence swallowed the room like a Lethifold.

When he wasn’t asking deliberately absurd questions on material you hadn’t yet covered, Snape had used every opportunity to make rude comments about Lupin and his curriculum. Sure, it was a well-known rumour among the older students that Snape had been gunning for Lupin’s job for years. Sure, Snape was probably still raw about the whole Boggart-in-a-dress incident that happened in one of Lupin’s third-year classes earlier last month. As seventh-years, you were all well-accustomed to Snape’s baiting tactics whenever he was in a foul mood, knowing the best way of dealing with them was to keep your head down and your mouth shut.

But no one wanted to break the news to Lupin, especially not when he seemed to be feeling so much better.

“We’re just happy to have you back, Professor,” you finally said, breaking the silence, to the emphatic agreement of the rest of the class.

It was the first time you’d spoken in his class in over a month.

He met your eyes, and all you could see was the pale green, green, green of his own.

“Well, then,” he smiled at you. “It’s good to be back.”

You were just being honest, but the way he beamed at you made your heart leap into your throat.

You looked down at a particularly fascinating scratch mark on your desk, trying to will away the steam you swore was pouring out of your ears.

“Now,” he continued. “It’s been a little over a month since the start of term. I have a fair idea of how we should advance.

“The standard Defence Against the Dark Arts curriculum for your first several years entails a balanced mixture of spells and dark creatures. Your sixth and seventh years, however, have a much stronger focus on practical defensive magic. Professor Lockhart was on the right track, I think, starting a Duelling Club--though, my idea involves a bit less showboating.”

Lupin walked around to the front of his desk, leaning back against it to face his class.

“When it comes to this level of study, there is a level of understanding I must help you achieve. Yes, to pass your N.E.W.T.s, of course--but for real life application, as well. You’re far more likely to face another witch or wizard in combat than a Hinkypunk, after all. As with all things within this classroom, I pray you’ll never need this knowledge outside of it, but if you do...I want you to be prepared.”

A boy sitting near you raised his hand. “What is it we’re preparing for, exactly?”

Lupin shrugged, his shoulders shifting with the ominous weight of a history he would not share. “Whatever wicked this way comes.”

-

The purpose of your earlier spellwork review became clear as you spent the next few weeks practicing the identification of an opponent’s spell based on how they moved their wand. Of course, the readings only worked with spells that required more complex movements than point-and-cast, but once you knew what to look for, it was a surprisingly useful ability.

“Spellcasting is, in part, a visual skill,” Lupin had said, pacing through the classroom of duelling pairs, “universal across all spoken languages. When you cast a spell, you are writing your intentions in mid-air, plain as day. We each have our own little differences, our own styles--almost like a signature. With enough practice, you can learn to read an opponent’s moves as easily as their handwriting.”

Professor Lupin was a phenomenal teacher.

Though topics grew more complicated, he would do his best to ensure everyone’s understanding before moving on to something new. His exams and essay gradings were tough, but fair--whenever you received a paper back, you could expect the margins to be filled with his neat handwriting, containing helpful notes and further readings to help you going forward. During practical exercises, he would give careful attention to every student he passed by, providing praise and advice alike, adjusting the wrists and hands of those whose stances were a little off--and over time, you found yourself getting your stances wrong on purpose, just to have an excuse.

Defence Against the Dark Arts quickly went from your worst subject to your most anticipated class.

“Today,” he began one day, “we will be learning about one of the most satisfying techniques in the art of duelling: spell chains.

“Now, without getting too much into the details of wand movement theory and multi-spell compatability, spell chaining is exactly what it says on the tin--chaining spells together, one after the other, for faster casting and maximum effect. Before today, when you performed spells, each spell was exclusive from one another, yes? You’d practice a charm, reset your wand, and practice the charm again.” He exaggerated waves of his own wand as an example. “This gave you the habit of resetting your wand to center between every single spell. Wastes quite a bit of time, if you’re battling it out. If spell one ends here,” and he pointed his wand off-center, “spell two can be started instantly, right at this point. Spell chaining. Understand?”

The class gave murmurs of general agreement.

“Good. Who can tell me about Hobblemane’s Fourth Law?”

You and a few of your classmates raised your hands. He called on you, and you tried to ignore the way his eyes seemed to brighten as he did so.

“Hobblemane’s Fourth Law of Magical Energy,” you said, “states that a deflection of a spell, followed by a chained cast of that same spell, will use residual magic from the deflected spell to increase the chained spell’s strength.”

“Excellent! This is a very important concept to remember, mind you--I would be surprised if it wasn’t a question on your N.E.W.T.s. If I cast a Stunning Spell, and you deflect it with a Shield Charm chained into a counter Stunning Spell, that chained Stunning Spell will be much more powerful than you rebounding my spell back at me, or performing a Stunning Spell all on its own. Let’s give it a go, shall we?” he asked, and he motioned for you to come up to the front of the class.

The way your stomach churned made you feel full of Mandrake spit, again.

For some reason, you glanced around the room before you walked up, as if searching for someone else to volunteer as tribute. Your classmates were already muttering amongst themselves. You tried not to think about what they were saying about you.

Lupin offered a small smile. “The theory’s more complicated than the execution, I promise you.”

His hand rested against the small of your back to guide you, and your heart lodged itself somewhere in your windpipe, again.

All too quickly, he positioned himself several feet across from you.

“Very straightforward,” he assured, pulling his wand from his robes. “I will cast a spell. You will shield yourself and chain cast the same spell back at me, without repositioning your wand to center. Simple enough?”

“Yes, Professor.”

“Good. Wand at the ready, then.”

You drew your wand from your robe pockets--jet-black, a little worn--and raised it, swallowing hard. He wasn’t giving you much time to be nervous, but you figured that was his point.

“One spell into the other,” he repeated, his own wand raised in return. “Just like a signature.”

You nodded.

A beat of silence.

Lupin’s movements were brisk and immediate, but a month’s worth of practice had you recognizing the shape of his spell moments before blue light erupted from the end of his wand.

You focused to make sure muscle memory didn’t bring your wand back to center--you made a slashing movement for the Shield Charm, flowing straight into the wispy movements for the chained Knockback Jinx. Another blue light, much more intense than the first, shot from your wand almost instantly.

Lupin shielded himself, and the spell dissipated with a deafening crack.

The duel had taken less than a second.

The sheer speed of the exchange, in combination with the enhanced power of the chained spell, drew amazement and applause from the rest of the class.

“Brilliant!” Lupin cheered. “Fantastic work, ten points to Slytherin.”

You broke into the biggest smile you’d felt on yourself in months.

You could still feel the ghost of his hand pressed against your lower back, and you had a feeling it might be there for a while.

-

Halloween brought with it the first Hogsmeade visit of the year.

As per Snape’s instructions, you weren’t allowed to leave the castle grounds until the next electrical storm. You were almost frustrated about not being able to make the day trip until you realized that, since the potion was made, Snape and McGonagall were also having to coordinate one of them being at the castle at all times, entirely for your supervision. Frustration gave way to overwhelming gratitude. Once this was over, you definitely needed to show them how grateful you were.

You had too much work to do to go to Hogsmeade, anyway.

In lieu of an in-class exam, Professor Vector wanted a historical number chart plotted for the entire year of 1872. Professor McGonagall wanted a roll of parchment on the Principle of Artificianimate Quasi-Dominance by Friday. Professor Snape expected his entire class to brew the Volubilis Potion from memory tomorrow morning, which was already difficult without him adding multitudes of instructions that weren’t even in the textbook he assigned. And you were behind on your Protean Charm practice for Professor Flitwick--you still hadn’t managed to get your second match to catch fire when the first one was lit, though you thought you saw it at least smoking a little last time you tried.

Your steady improvement in Defence Against the Dark Arts made it easier to see the gaps in your knowledge: things you should’ve known from earlier years, but never fully grasped. You added your previous years’ notes and books to the pile of things you needed to study, only to realize you didn’t have any proper material from year six--just a stack of discredited autobiographies from an old fraud.

Maybe Professor Lupin had some textbooks you could borrow.

As you made the familiar trek down the second-floor corridor, you spotted a third-year Gryffindor leaving Lupin’s office. The boy had unkempt dark hair and round glasses, and as his bright emerald eyes flickered up at you in passing, you couldn’t help but feel a little starstruck, like you did whenever you passed him in the halls.

If the rumors were anything to go by, Potter had been through the goddamned ringer since he arrived. You found it a wonder he kept coming back to Hogwarts, as you would’ve packed up ages ago if you’d seen half the things he saw at this school; two years in, and stories of what he’d done here were already legend. The famous jinx on the Defence Against the Dark Arts professorship was in effect long before he arrived, but he’d still killed Professor Quirrell-slash-You-Know-Who in his first year, and sent Professor Lockhart to St. Mungo’s long-term care in his second.

...you really, really hoped Harry Potter liked Professor Lupin.

Lupin was at his office entrance when you arrived, seeing Potter off. He didn’t seem to notice you at first, and you failed to ignore how charming he looked just standing there, half-slouching against the doorway with his hands in his pockets. He wasn’t wearing his robes, just a loose cardigan over a dress shirt and tie, with wear and tear in all the wrong places; he wore his dishevelment on his threadbare sleeves, and he made it work, somehow, wholly comfortable in his own skin.

His pale green eyes fell on you, and you remembered his hand on your back, again.

“Oh, hello,” he beamed. “Surprised to see another student not at Hogsmeade.”

“It loses its novelty after the first few years,” you lied, smiling back.

“Really? I’d think Honeydukes alone is worth the trip. What I wouldn’t do for a square of Pink Coconut Ice...I’ve been clean out for a while, now.”

“Why aren’t you at Hogsmeade, Professor?”

He suddenly looked rather tired. “I’ve got my own fair share of work to do, here.”

“Oh!” You pointed over your shoulder, into the distance behind you. “If you’re busy, I can come back later--”

“Not at all, I could use the distraction. I’ve just put on some tea, actually.” He jerked his head towards his office. “Come, keep me company.”

Your heart fluttered as you followed his lead.

Professor Lupin’s office smelled like freshly laundered linen and old parchment. A large, gilded window kept the room well-lit. Dark bookshelves lined the walls, overstacked with old, battered tomes of all shapes and sizes. A massive water tank took up a whole corner of the office, its small, tentacled occupant swimming in agitated circles behind glass. You had a sudden flashback to the first time you tried to visit; if Lupin kept live dark creatures in his office, you figured having a magical seal on his door made sense.

“Please, have a seat,” he offered.

You parked yourself in the squishy armchair in front of his desk, as he rounded his office to the still-steaming kettle nearby. An empty goblet sat on his desk, surrounded by rolls of half-marked student papers, and you couldn’t help but notice that the goblet was identical to the ones lining the shelves of the Potions classroom. Professor Snape was already substituting for Lupin’s classes--was he helping him manage his illness, as well?

Before that train of thought could develop much further, Lupin leaned right over your shoulder, setting a chipped mug in front of you. For the briefest of moments, you caught his scent: clean and cold and vaguely nostalgic.

He smelled like an autumn night.

(A stray thought urged you to jump.)

Sometime within the past couple of months, you’d come to terms with the fact that you may have fancied your professor. It was harmless, in the grand scheme of things--it wasn’t as if you were ever going to tell him, nor were you absurd enough to think it could ever be reciprocated. As it stood, it was something that made you eager to come to class, something that made you work just a little bit harder--and with the amount of studying you needed to do as-is, you would take every bit of motivation you could get.

You definitely had this under control. Definitely.

Sipping your tea, you watched him take the seat behind his desk. Cursive words faded onto the surface of his own mug as the ceramic warmed up in his grasp.

Your such a teas!

“Interesting cup,” you smirked.

“Oh, this old thing?” Lupin turned it towards himself, reading what it said. “Yes, it tells a different tea pun each time you use it. A friend gave it to me, years ago--I daresay the enchantment’s wearing off, though, that grammar is atrocious. How are your studies?”

“Fantastic,” you said, a touch more resolute than the situation warranted.

He raised an eyebrow. “Unusual word to describe your seventh year.”

“If I say it enough, maybe it’ll come true.”

“Given, it’s not the strangest coping mechanism I’ve seen so far.”

“Are you making fun of me, Professor?”

“I would never.”

You smiled at one another from behind your mugs.

Lupin set his back on the desk. “Well, if you’re here to inquire about your grades, you’ve nothing to worry about. Your in-class performance left a bit to be desired at first, but you’ve shown significant improvement this month. It’s wonderful to see you coming out of your shell.”

You bristled. There was no shell, you just had to carry a disgusting leaf in your mouth for four weeks and couldn’t talk properly, but you couldn’t very well tell him that now. If he interpreted this as improvement in his class, however, that was to your advantage--improvement stood out more than consistency, after all.

“Thank you, Professor. That’s good to know, but that isn’t why I’m here.”

“What can I do for you, then?”

“I’m reviewing my old Defence Against the Dark Arts notes, and I realized I don’t have any…” You chose your words carefully. “...credible materials for year six. I was wondering what textbook you assigned your sixth years, and if you had a spare copy I could borrow for a while?”

“I do, actually,” he said, brightening up. “I assigned Arsenius Jigger across classes. Sixth year would be Defence Against the Dark Arts: An Introductory Guide for Practical Use--and I’m sure I have an extra copy lying around here somewhere...”

He rifled through his desk drawers, and the hasty ruffle of parchment filled the room. Muttering to himself, he ducked to continue his search through the drawers, lowering further and further until you could barely see the top of his head behind his desk. He shoved a drawer closed with too much force; rolls of parchment went tumbling across the desktop, and on reflex, you stretched your hands out to keep them from falling off the edges. They were all labelled ‘N.E.W.T. Progress Guide,’ in Lupin’s careful handwriting, each a different version marked with roman numerals.

“‘Progress Guides’?” you read, aloud.

Lupin popped up from behind his desk, a book in hand. “Oh, yes. I’ve got my work cut out for me, as you can see.”

“There are fourteen versions here,” you said, reading the numbers as you tried to stack the rolls back onto each other. “Are you running fourteen different N.E.W.T. classes, Professor?”

“Gracious, no--just three, in total. But with Lockhart’s curriculum...well, everyone I teach is almost a year behind.” He gave a tired laugh, and a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Catching up seventh-year students with sixth-year concepts isn’t too complicated, as sixth and seventh year N.E.W.T. curriculums tie into each other. But catching up sixth-years with fifth-year content in addition to what they should be studying for the N.E.W.T.s is...rather challenging.”

All too empathetic with his dilemma, you nodded. “With all due respect to Professor Dumbledore, I’m surprised someone like Lockhart got hired in the first place. The teachers I’ve had for Defence Against the Dark Arts have all been pretty abysmal so far, but he was really...something else.”

“Dumbledore did his best with what he had, I’m sure. This post is an extremely difficult position to fill--it is jinxed, after all.”

“At least he got it right this time,” you said, unable to stop yourself.

“That’s...very kind of you to say.”

You continued busying yourself with the small tower of rolled parchment. You could hear the warm smile in his voice, coating his words like a happy secret, but you couldn’t bring yourself to actually look at him, not after such flagrant flattery--you were here for a little self-indulgence, sure, but now you were just being careless.

“You can borrow this one, by the way,” he offered. “It’s my personal copy, you may find the notes helpful.”

Your eyes flitted over to the textbook he was handing you. The book was bound in dark hardcover, its edges worn and its title glittering silver. Accepting it, you chanced a glance up at him, only to meet his eyes as he considered you--really considered you--his mouth rounding some word he hadn’t yet voiced.

“This might be unconventional,” he started, sounding wistful, “but I think I may have a solution that would work out for the both of us.”

“...sir?”

“How would you like to be my teaching assistant for the sixth years?”

“Me?”

“Why not?” he offered, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “You’ve shown the most improvement in your class over the past two months. And you’ve demonstrated an earnest, self-motivated drive for learning, just by coming here today and asking me for this book.”

You gave a small, uncomfortable laugh. “But that hardly makes me qualified to teach.”

“Not teaching,” he corrected, pointing a finger in the air. “Teaching assistant. Going over assignments, grading papers, gathering resources for my classes. You would be studying the same curriculum as my sixth-years in real-time, which is--if I’m not mistaken--where you need the extra study. And you would be helping me just as much,” he sighed, motioning to the rolls upon rolls of his multiple curriculum revisions. “I could do with another pair of eyes on this. Only if you had the time, of course.”

You did not have the time. You did not have the time.

You definitely did not have the time.

“I’d be honoured,” you accepted, stupidly.

“Excellent! I’ll need to clear it with Dumbledore and Professor Snape, but I’ll let you know as soon as I do.”

Your heart sank as quickly as it had lifted. “Professor Snape?”

“I can tell you’re worried,” he smiled. “I’ll need to speak with him, yes--he is your head of house, after all. But let me take care of that. I’m only glad to have some help.”

Lupin offered a handshake over his desk, and you took it.

In three hours’ time, you would find yourself at the Halloween feast down in the Great Hall, surrounded by dancing ghosts, delicious food, and far too many sweets to not stuff your pockets for later. In five hours’ time, you would find yourself ushered back to the Great Hall from your dormitory, quarantined to a sea of squishy purple sleeping bags, as news of a break-in that evening instigated a school-wide manhunt for Sirius Black.

But in that moment, his hand was in your hand and his smile was in your eyes.

He is an autumn night, and you jump.

[proverbsofpestilence]

I know this coward blocked us all, but I’m still gonna publish it, BECAUSE I WAS READY TO POST IT JUST BEFORE OUR QUEEN VALENTINA BLOCKED US ALL. I knew you were waste of time, but damn. I guess that’s it for “I don’t care about this discussion and I’m back to my great amazing life”, huh?

tbh I hadn’t planned to respond in the beginning, because of this post:

(that you btw deleted after few minutes and didn’t even mention me like an unbothered warrior princess you are) if there were fucking diplomas in pseudosciense yours should had been taken away after saying that “ENFJ 6 so/sx is the type that’s more able to survive/navigate in the real world”. girl, have you seen sp blind 6? they’re rare, but they’re exist. and you’re one of them.

>I’m replying to you idiots @hitsujinko @proverbsofpestilence on a different post because that’s what you two should have done in the beginning

oh you mean, we should reply to you in different post without even mentioning you and then delete it right away? like you did? wow great, thanks for your tip.

>Hmm no, @syntheticalcomposure didn’t have to be “sceptic” of my post because it said nothing controversial, she just doesn’t fucking know how to read

no, girl. she just noticed that you’re post is kinda. basic. and then commented to straight things out. and you got all defensive and acted like she was attacking you while she was actually agreeing with you. you’re disintegrating and trying to act like you’re better than smarter than all the other people to cover up your mistake. been there, done that.

>And bitch i’m sorry but i’m not attacked at all because you don’t have any power over me, i’m literally chilling on my bed drinking a smoothie and you’re the only one who cares so much about my type but okay

oh I care! because I hoped you would actually type yourself correctly after this whole time. you know, I mentioned I followed you. it was a long time ago, but guess what! I actually liked you. past tense. don’t judge book by its cover, right?

now it’s just entertaining to make fun of you.

>And again, I have no inch of enneagram 6 on my body. Their outlook in life sickens me and it’s completely different to how I survive, if i was a 6 I wouldn’t even be alive lmao. You have absolutely no basis to type me as a 6 other than what you’re projecting into me

you have no inch of 6 in your body and yet u were mistyped as one? :0000 just like u have no inch of 9 in your body and you’re mistyped as one? gotcha.

and you keep. accusing others of projecting. like you’re doing it yourself.

“ew dont call me sweetie, we’re not there yet” okay. bitch. are we there yet? :))

>Also what community??? What the fuck is a community and especially online??? Shut up your soc”

do you think soc blinds are dumb? no, seriously. another prove you don’t understand theory at all. soc blind have poor understanding of social bonds and constructs or just simply don’t even acknowlegde them in the first place. they know what fucking community is. you know. the way a lot of soc blind people use to describe “””typology fandom”””.

also wow! I’m soc. yeah I have fucking soc in my stacking u fucking moron. what are u even trying to prove.

> Which by the way was: you can’t type someone’s enneagram based on outwardly behaviors alone but instead you have to think of the reasons why they do them

don’t worry, you’re not a special snowflake. if INFP 4 so/sp can be typed by one single post alone, you can be too.

>Also what community??? Again with your SOC bullshit???? Who is defending me??? Of what????? The way you all think is so freaking weird

are you serious. like. I know you think I’m dumb. but have some fucking respect for soc blinds. they’re not that fucking stupid as you try to portray them.

>Just because I don’t sound like those stupid infjs here using difficult words and concepts because they’re so smart uwu , doesn’t mean I’m not one

what. who said that. who fucking said that.

>Check how @mowoths expresses her thoughts vs the way I express mine. She’s an enfj, i’m not and you can clearly see how different we both are

she’s not 6. also she’s not dumb. important factor, ya know.

>You: valentina is a fe-dom Also you: valentina is not capable of having the most basic skills of a real fe-dom

yay! and I actually believed you know your shit since you were into it for so long.

>Like… Make a decision????

like u did with your typing that u kept constantly changing back?

>What???? The reason behind this is not inferior Ti. It’s simply because English is not my first language and I don’t know how to express myself correctly in a way that makes sense, especially not to natives or more advanced speakers. If all of you spoke Spanish, i promise I wouldn’t sound “disconnected from everything”. So stop being a bitch just because you understand this language better than I do

babie. sweetie. honey. bitch.

1) I’m not native English speaker neither,

2) you speak English just fine,

3) that’s not a fucking excuse because your English. is just fucking fine. probably better than mine.

>But have you seen my actual aes instead of the shit I reblog? Let’s be realistic: They suck. If you compare them to the aes of the actual high se users

>there are actual parameters that show wether someone’s a high se user or not and i don’t have any of those, not even one

umm what. I said your aes is tert Se. not high Se good.

wait, who was accused who of not being capable of reading again?

>I do have the presence of a gut core but you can’t fucking know that because you have never seen me in real life. And yes, i know people can see through you online but NOT in the way you’re doing it. This is not it. I do have everything a 9 core has but that could only be seen if you actually knew me

oh you have such poor self awareness but you know what type of presence you give off? also. it’s. a fucking. vibe. I don’t need to see you to feel your presence. every single gut core has it. every single one of them. I can fucking talk to person online and still figure out that they have gut core energy. sad you apparently can’t.

>And so-dom??? What the actual fuck???? I am EVERYTHING except that. I have never exhibited any behavior of that ???? I’m a so-blind, the end.

yeah sure. I totally believe you. soc blinds don’t know what community is. don’t realize when someone’s defending them even when they mention them in their own post to support their stand. that’s not like you also automatically assumed I’m friends with synthie just because I agree with her on this topic. like you know. soc would do.

>Okay, okay… I would maybe believe you if you told me I’m a SX/SO because that would make some sense and i typed as that before. Except that i don’t have ANY trait of a sp-blind. Then nope, i’m still a so-blind

okay, so sx/so would make sense because you typed as one before? then why the fuck ENFJ and 6 are completely out of options? you were mistyped as them too. also I love that you keep saying you cannot be this type because either just no or other factors. but don’t worry. most people are able to type people by, you know, observing their behaviour and talking to them. which I just did.

>Also, i’m the most SX-dom to ever exist???? If we could have only one IV, i would simply be SX

nah, you’re not. you have sx, it’s true, but it’s not dom.

>What a stupid argument adjfkrk. I haven’t ended this conversation because a) I’m right and b) who gives a single fuck about an internet discussion????? Do you know all of this literally doesn’t matter in real life????? Do you know i’ll just post this and go back to my amazing life as if it didn’t happen????

wow, so because it doesn’t matter you keep responding? addition: that’s why you blocked as all? also “amazing life”??? can you turn off your fucking 3 fix soc for one goddamn second.

no one taught you that the harder you try to appear as something you’re not, the worse it gets?

>In real life, i’m conflict avoidant and i don’t have to prove that to you

THIS IS REAL LIFE. YOU’RE TALKING TO A REAL PERSON. I’M TALKING TO YOU. A REAL PERSON. YOU FUCKING TYPED THIS ON YOUR KEYBOARD OR ON YOUR PHONE. WHATEVER. YOU SPEND YOUR APPARENTLY SUPER AMAZING IRL TIME TO INTERACT WITH ME IN THE SAME WAY YOU WOULD INTERACT WITH ACTUAL PEOPLE. seeing you in real life would change NOTHING, except I’d be able to see your body language. which honestly doesn’t matter when you’re so obvious to type.

9 would end this conversation a long time ago. An actual INFJ 9 told you that.

>finally the fact that I don’t understand english well enough (again, stop being so fucking condescending about this)

??????SDFfkhkfhjjkKDFKFGFJjkg?YUHRTO7O78??????????????????SDFKDFKDH??? WHERE BITCH. WHERE. you’re projecting. I didn’t say anything about your english skills in my post. nothing. but you’re insecure about it and you’re projecting your fear onto me, thinking I was mocking you for it. why can’t you see the shit you accuse others of doing?

>Also I love that you genuily think I’m an ENFJ 639 SO/SX… As if that wouldn’t be the type most known for their amazing social skills

once again. you don’t know theory. you don’t know what soc blidness actually looks like. you don’t know what Fe is like. you don’t know what any enneagram type is like.

also, sp-blind 6s are rare, but they exists. mostly nothing but a giant mess.

>Literally no one could ever get close to my level of optimism and hope in other people, the universe and life in general

>For 6s, when something goes wrong they literally think their whole life is over. While instead i ignore whatever is going wrong and get back up without thinking

psst. have u ever heard of 6w7? because I just found out your wing!

>I also trust people a lot. Of course I’m not a naive bitch who lets everyone in because I have SP. But what I mean is i don’t distrust everyone and think that they’re all against me and are going to betray me, as 6s usually do. I don’t test people to prove if i should trust them or not. All 6s do that and I think it’s pathetic

you don’t understand what 6s are.

also. everyone thinks 6s are pathethic. including 6s themselves.

>Finally, If I don’t trust myself it’s because of my mental illnesses and countless childhood trauma. Literally every type can distrust themselves. But fuck you for making me bring that up

no one fucking made you bring it up. fucking. no one. stop being so goddamn defensive. stop acting like a victim. stop projecting. stop trying so hard to act like someone you’re not. you could, you know, FUCKING YEET OUT OF THIS DISCUSSION LIKE A PROPER 9 WOULD DO

>If i ever use projection as a defense mechanism, it’s only due to my mental illnesses and what i have always been taught. This was literally the point of my post, every single type can be an emotional mess: as proven by me and my family

“ever”. ha. funny joke.

you realize just because your behaviour can be justified by external something, it doesn’t mean you can’t be a 6? like. for example, you can be a shut in because of your social phobia AND be a 5. one doesn’t exclude each other.

or like fucking me, be a 6 and have clinical anxiety that is actually not fucking related to your type.

>And i’m not acting defensive and attacked??? I’m literally chilling here… and unlike you, studying for my future and doing something productive with my life :) 

wow I’m so unbothered wow :) and chill :) like a conflict avoidant type I am :) like the person that keeps projecting shit :) that doesn’t know when to give up :) that keeps accusing people of attacking her :) that calls people bitches and then delete post because they’re a coward :) that blocks people because she can’t handle admitting she was wrong :) that feels a need to consantly repeat how unbothered she is because god she’s so unbothered :)

>No shit sherlock, there you go again schooling me about something I already know

wow you know this? weird. because u keep proving you don’t know basic stuff.

oh and louder for people in the back.

STOP BEING SO GODDAMN DEFENSIVE. STOP ACTING LIKE A VICTIM. STOP PROJECTING. STOP TRYING SO HARD TO ACT LIKE SOMEONE YOU’RE NOT. AND FOR SAKE OF THIS FUCKING WORLD TURN OFF YOUR 3 FIX SOC BECAUSE YOU’RE LITERALLY UNBEARABLE TO LISTEN TO.