#thank you for the ask hahahaha
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compacflt Ā· 2 years ago
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okay "normie median Biden voter ice" got me. That's funny. But also so true! It prob took him a bit to vote dem too (though I believe that Ice would have never voted for Trump). Would love to hear more thoughts on Ice and Mav's politics. Also the list of who they would have voted for if you're willing to share.
i do worry that posting my extremely in-depth headcanons about some of this stuff will have the JKR ā€œwizard shitā€ effect on my writing and ruin it a little, but ask and ye shall receive
copy-pasted straight from my list of ā€œunhinged compacflt!top gun headcanonsā€ that ive been keeping since september: on ice & mav's politics
16. Since their friendship began, Ice has always told Maverick who to vote for, since Maverick doesn't care enough to pay attention to national politics. They are begrudging ConservaDems (conservative political views, would vote conservative every election if Republicans werenā€™t actively sending them to war/actively promoting fascism). Iceā€™s voting record (and after 1988, Mavā€™s too) 1980-2020ā€”note that he has always considered himself an ā€œeducated moderateā€: 1980: Reagan. 1984: Reagan. 1988: Bush. 1992: Bush. 1996: Clinton (reaction to aftermath of PGW. Doesnā€™t care that Clinton enacted DADT because ā€œIā€™m not [redacted], so it doesnā€™t apply to meā€). 2000: Gore (refusal to vote for another Bush). 2004: Kerry (Mav votes Bush this year out of spite as he and Ice are going through their break-up). 2008: McCain (Navy loyalty). 2012: Obama (liked him as a person/worked closely with him, didnā€™t like his policies so much). 2016: Clinton (no other alternative). 2020: Biden (actually liked/previously worked with Biden, and now actively married to another man and therefore had to make some liberal concessions). 2024-onwards they will vote for any Democrat as long as they arenā€™t a ā€œsocialist.ā€
17. Also, Maverick didnā€™t vote in 2016. Partially because in my universe the TGM mission takes place that November, very near the election, and he has bigger fish to fry (something Ice will later take him to task for), and partially because I genuinely think he wouldnā€™t be able to stomach either mainstream candidate and probably wouldā€™ve voted for Libertarian Gary Johnson, which might have torn his relationship with Ice to shreds a few days before schedule. ā€œAre you fucking kidding me? Johnson? Pete, this moronā€™s moronic party wants to abolish the driverā€™s licenseā€”ā€ / ā€œā€”Yeah, and then I could ride your sweet wheels with no problem whatsoeverā€”maybe heā€™ll abolish pilotsā€™ licenses, too, Iā€™d like to see thatā€”ā€ / ā€œIf you vote for Gary fucking Johnson, I will very happily stop footing the bill for your piece-of-shit airplane, and you can see how useful your pilotā€™s license is thenā€”ā€ / So Mav didnā€™t vote in 2016.Ā 
35. In terms of what he Tweets: I do foresee, post-retirement, Ice basically becoming a neoliberal military intellectual type on Twitter a la Mark Hertling (look him up on Twitter). Bio: ā€œRetired @SECNAV. Advisor @WhiteHouse and @VoteVets. Contributing writer @TheAtlantic. Interested in geopolitics & modern warfare. Aviator, husband, Padres fan. [American flag emoji]ā€ Only posts pictures of himself and Maverick at three specific annual events: 1. their wedding anniversary (ā€œ36 years with this fool and heā€™s still surprised to find out that I like the F-5 better than the A-4 #happyanniversaryā€), 2. every EAA Airventure (huge airplane convention), 3. San Franciscoā€™s Fleet Week (which of course they MUST attend, they even headline it in 2018). Informative, analytical, highly-respected. Maybe goes on CNN or NBC all the time to talk about civil-military relations shit (aversion to FOX since the start of the Iraq War). Gonna say he had like four really viral threads about Russia and Ukraine in April or May and so has 300k followers or something like that. He has a personal website that links back to his Twitter and every essay he writes for international publications, with a pretty braggadocious bio (something along the lines of ā€œTom Kazansky has directly almost started global nuclear war twice in his life, and in the thirty-year gap in between, sold the Swiss half their entire goddamn Air Force and directed an entire Fleet during the Iraq Warā€). Lots of tweets like ā€œMilitary aviation hot take: Compared to the F-22, the F-35 is a waste of money. Source: husband with 400+ hours of F-35 experience.ā€ / ā€œ[Quote tweet of Russian Foreign Minister boasting about Su-57 production lines] Oh, so you guys finally figured out how to make more than one every other year?ā€ / ā€œAnalysis of the failure of Russiaā€™s Black Sea Fleet in Ukraine, from an ex-US Pacific Fleet Commanderā€™s perspective: a short [thread emoji] [This thread gets 26k likes and 4k retweets]ā€ / ā€œThis weekend my husband & I flew in to @EAA Oshkosh #OSH19 & took home first place for best P-51. Not to brag, but.ā€ (A reply to this tweet: ā€œSir, you really know how to bury the lede that your husband is Adm. Pete ā€˜Maverickā€™ Mitchell. I had to look it up on Wikipedia.ā€ / @TKazansky: ā€œWhat, was it not obvious? Who else could it have been?ā€) Also, I see him writing a whole bunch of op-eds for international political magazines a la Tom Nichols (look him up on Twitter too). Writing analyses of recent geopolitical/military events for the New York Times, the New Yorker, the Bulwark, the Navy Times, the Atlantic, Bellingcat, etc. Not so much focused on domestic issues (but VoteVets [socially progressive vetsā€™ group] board member, and ardently pro-democracy, yay!). Heā€™s a smart guy.
37. This is not a headcanon, just kind of aā€¦ a real-life implication. My Ice was Deputy Commander of Third Fleet in 2003, meaning heā€™d have been there in command of the USS Abraham Lincoln when President Bush gave his ā€œMission Accomplishedā€ speech aboard that ship in May less than 2 months after the initial American invasion of Iraq. Very premature & embarrassing. Ice wouldā€™ve been in direct contact with Bush/Cheney/NSC bureaucrats many, many times during the war. I genuinely believe this is what pushed him over the edge into firm liberal territory.
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resplendent-ragamuffin Ā· 4 months ago
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I have encountered issues with JVP in the past in regards to not accommodating kashrut/shabbat observance (and wheelchairs), but previously hasnā€™t heard about the Mikvah thing. Do you have any sources I can refer to?
Oh boy. Oh boy oh boy oh boy. The noise I made when I saw this ask.
You are probably unaware but I have literally been working on a post on this topic since February. Bless you for asking me about it and giving me a reason to share it. Genuinely. I'm delighted.
Without further ado, now that I've finally finished:
On the JVP Mikveh BS
Some of you are no doubt aware of the Jewish Voice for Peace Mikveh Guide (on JVPā€™s website here, and here on the Wayback Machine in case that link breaks). You may have seen the post I reblogged about it, you may have seen the post about JVP in general on @is-the-thing-actually-Jewish, or you may have heard about it elsewhere. Or maybe youā€™ve somehow managed to avoid all knowledge of its existence. (God I wish that were me.) Even if you know about it, even if youā€™ve scanned through it, you probably havenā€™t taken the time to read it through properly.
I have.
God help me.
I was originally looking through it to help draft the @is-the-thing-actually-Jewish post back in February, but some terrible combination of horror, indignation, and probably masochism compelled me to do a close reading, so that I could write this analysis and share it with you, dear readers. For those of you whoā€™ve never heard of a mikvah, for those of you whoā€™ve immersed in one, for those of you whoā€™ve studied it intenselyā€”I give you this, the fruit of my suffering, so you too can understand why ā€œMikveh: A Purification Ritual for Personal and Collective Transformation,ā€ written by Zohar Lev Cunningham and Rebekah Erev for Jewish Voice for Peace has got so many people up in arms.
Brace yourselves. Itā€™s going to be a long journey.
First off, a disclaimer: When I say something is ā€œrequired in Jewish lawā€ or whatnot, Iā€™m talking about in traditional practice / Torah-observant communities; what is often called ā€œOrthodox.ā€ Thereā€™s a wide range of Jewish practice, and what is required in frum (observant) Judaism may not be required in Reform Judaism, etc. Donā€™t at me.
Second note: I myself am Modern Orthodox, and come from that perspective. Iā€™m also very much more on the rationalist side than the mysticism side of things. I did run this past people from other communities. Still, if Iā€™ve missed or misrepresented something, it was my error and was not meant maliciously.
Third: I am not a rabbi. I am a nerd who likes explaining things and doing deep dives. Again, I may have made errorsā€“please let me know if you spot any, and Iā€™d be happy to discuss them.
Now then. Before we get into the text itself, letā€™s give some background.
WHAT IS THIS MIKVEH THING ANYWAY?
A mikveh (or mikvah, both they and I switch between spellings; plural mikvaā€™ot) is a Jewish ritual bath, sometimes translated as an immersion pool. Some communities or organizations that run mikvaā€™ot will have a single all-purpose all-purpose, some have separate human- and utensil-pools, and some have separate womenā€™s and menā€™s pools. The majority of the water in a mikvah has to be ā€œliving waters,ā€ i.e. naturally collected rather than from a tap or a bucket. Some natural bodies of water can also be used, such as the ocean and some rivers (ask your local rabbi). The construction is complicated and has extremely detailed requirements. Hereā€™s an example of a modern mikvah:
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(By Wikimedia Commons (ויקיגמדון) - Own work, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=17373540)
Whoever is being dunked (the scientific term) has to be entirely immersed, and the water has to be in direct contact with all of them. That means no clothes, no makeup, no hair floating on the top of the water, no feet touching the floor, no clenched fists. You have to be completely clean as well, so no dirt is obstructing you from the water.
In essence, a person or thing is immersed in a mikvah to change their/its state from tameh (ritually ā€œimpureā€) to tahor (ritually ā€œpureā€). I use quotes because ā€œpure/impureā€ arenā€™t really good translationsā€”they have value judgments that tameh/tahor donā€™t. Thereā€™s nothing wrong with being tameh, you arenā€™t lesser because you are tamehā€”itā€™s just a state one enters when one comes into contact with death and related concepts. (There are also different levels of both.) As a matter of fact, technically speaking even after going to a mikvah basically all people are tameh nowā€”the tumā€™ah (ā€œimpurity,ā€ sort of) that comes from contact with dead humans can only be removed by the Red Heifer offering (see Numbers 19), which we canā€™t do without the Temple. (Why I say ā€œallā€ even if youā€™ve never been to a funeral is a much much longer tangent that Iā€™ll spare you for now.) To quote one of my editors on this, mikvah is ā€œabout the natural oscillation between states of ritual purity and impurity. Men go to mikveh after having seminal emissions. Menstruating women go to mikveh on a monthly basis (emphasis added).ā€ Itā€™s just states of life.
In the days of the Temple, one had to be tahor to enter it (the Temple). Archaeologists have found a ton of ancient mikvaā€™ot in Jerusalem that were presumably used by people visiting the Temple, which personally I think is extremely cool.
Nowadays, there are three main traditionally required uses for a mikvah. First, and most importantly, observant married women will go about once a month as part of their niddah (menstrual) cycle, part of practice known as Taharat HaMishpacha, or ā€œFamily ā€˜Purity,ā€™ā€ which at its root is a way to sanctify the relationship between spouses. Until she immerses, a wife and husband cannot resume relations. And not just sexā€”in some communities, they canā€™t sleep in the same bed or even have any physical contact at all.
The second use is for conversionā€”immersion is a central part of the conversion ceremony. One enters the water a gentile, and emerges a Jew.
The third usage is a bit different as itā€™s not for people. Tablewareā€”plates, cups, etc.ā€”made of certain materials have to be immersed before they can be used. This isnā€™t what the Guide is about, so Iā€™m not going to go into that as much, but felt remiss if I didnā€™t mention it was a thing. If you want to know more, Chabad has an article on it here.
Aside from uses required by Jewish law, there is a strong tradition in some communities for men to go to the mikveh just before Yom Kippur, or sometimes every week before the Sabbath, to enter the holiday in as ā€œpureā€ a state as possible these days. (The things theyā€™re ā€œpurifyingā€ from still made them tameh, it just matters less without the Temple.) There is also a strong custom to immerse before oneā€™s wedding. Less traditional communities have also started using mikvah for other transitional moments, such as significant birthdays or remission from cancer. There has recently been an ā€œopen mikvahā€ movement, which ā€œis committed to making mikveh accessible to Jews of all denominations, ages, genders, sexual orientations, and abilities (Rising Tide Network old website, ā€œWhy Open Mikvahā€).ā€
To quote others:
No other religious establishment, structure or rite can affect the Jew in this way and, indeed, on such an essential level. ā€”Rebbetzen Rivkah Slonim, Total Immersion, as quoted on Chabad.org
The mikveh is one of the most important parts of a Jewish community. ā€”Kylie Ora Lobell, ā€œWhat Is a Mikveh?ā€ on Aish.com
How important? According to Rav Moshe Feinstein, one of the great American rabbis of the 20th century, one should build a mikveh before building a synagogue in a town that has neither, and even in a town where there is a mikveh but itā€™s an inconvenient distance away from the community (Igros Moshe: Choshen Mishpat Chelek 1 Siman 42).
A mikveh is more important than a synagogue.
Iā€™d say thatā€™s pretty important.
Tl;dr: A mikveh is the conduit through which a convert becomes a part of the Jewish people. It is traditionally used to sanctify the relationship between spouses. It was required for people to go to the Temple, back when we still had it. It is extremely central to Jewish practice.
So. What does JVP have to say about it?
THE JVP MIKVEH GUIDE
The document in question is titled ā€œMikveh: A Purification Ritual for Personal and Collective Transformation,ā€ by Zohar Lev Cunningham and Rebekah Erev. I am largely going to quote directly from the text and then analyze and explain it.
Now let me be clear. Iā€™m not trying to say the authors arenā€™t Jewish. Iā€™m not saying theyā€™re bad people, or that you should attack them. I am not intending any of this as an ad hominem attack. But given the contents of this document, I do think it is fair to call this appropriative, even if it is of their own cultureā€”in the same way someone can have internalized racism, or twist feminism into being a TERF, I would argue that this is twisting Judaism into paganism. In fact, while I use ā€œappropriationā€ throughout this document, an extremely useful term thatā€™s been coined recently is ā€œcultural expropriationā€--essentially, appropriative actions done by rogue members of the community in question. One example of this would be the Kabbalah Centre in Los Angeles, which is the source of a lot of the Madonna-style ā€œpop Kabbalah.ā€ It was founded by an Orthodox Jewish couple, but it and its followers are widely criticized by most Jewish communities. In much the same way, the Guide is expropriation.Ā 
We start off with a note from the authors.
Hello, Welcome to the Simple Mikveh Guide. This work comes out of many years of reclaiming and re-visioning mikveh. The intention of this guide is to acknowledge and give some context to what mikveh is, provide resources related to mainstream understanding of mikveh and also provide alternative mikveh ideas. Blessings for enjoyment of this wonderful, simple Jewish ritual! Zohar Lev Cunningham & Rebekah Erev
This is fairly normal, though ā€œalternative mikveh ideasā€ is a bit odd to say. I also find ā€œblessings for enjoymentā€ to be odd phrasing, somewhat reminiscent of the Wiccan ā€œBlessed Be,ā€ but it could be a typo.
The first main section is titled ā€œIntro to Mikveh,ā€ and begins as follows:
Mikveh is an ancient Jewish ritual practice of water immersion, traditionally used for cleansing, purification, and transformation. It's been conventionally used for conversion to Judaism, for brides, and for niddah, the practice of cleansing after menstruation.
This is relatively accurate, and credit where credit is due avoids making niddah out to be patriarchal BS. I do object slightly to ā€œpurifyā€ as a translation without further explanation, as I went into above, and ā€œcleansingā€ for similar reasonsā€”it implies ā€œdirtiness,ā€™ which isnā€™t really what tumā€™ah is about. Also, though this is pretty minor, a bride going to the mikveh before her wedding is actually a part of the laws of niddah. Iā€™d also note that they entirely leave out that it was important for going to the Temple in ancient times, though given this is published by JVP Iā€™m not terribly surprised.
For Jews, water signifies the transformative moment from slavery in Egypt, through the parted Red Sea, and into freedom.
On the one hand, I suppose itā€™s not unreasonable to connect the Red Sea and mikveh, though I think Iā€™d be more likely to hear it the other way around (i.e. ā€œgoing through the sea was like the people immersing in a mikveh and being ā€˜cleansed,ā€™ so to speakā€). Though they were, rather importantly, not actually immersed in the water. However I donā€™t think Iā€™d say water as a whole signifies the Splitting of the Sea. In fact, water imagery is more often used to signify the Torah, see for instance Bava Kamma 82a.
There is also a mystical connection to mikveh as a metaphor for the womb of the divine.
A mikveh being like a womb is also not uncommon. Itā€™s found in the Reishis Chochmah (Shiaā€™ar HaAhavah 11,58) and the writing of Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan (The Aryeh Kaplan Anthology, vol 2., p. 382; both as quoted in 50 Mikvahs That Shaped History, by Rabbi Ephraim Meth), see also ā€œThe Mikvehā€™s Significance in Traditional Conversionā€ by Rabbi Maurice Lamm on myjewishlearning. Filled with water, you float in it, you emerge a new being (at least for conversion); itā€™s not an absurd comparison to draw. Iā€™m not sure Iā€™ve found anything for the Womb of the Divine specifically, though. (Also, Divine should definitely be capitalized.)
Entering a mikveh is a transformative and healing experience and we have long wondered why it is not available to more people, including the significant trans and queer populations in Jewish communities.
So. I am NOT going to say thereā€™s no problem with homophobia and/or transphobia in Jewish communities. Itā€™s definitely a community issue, and many communities are grappling with it in various ways as we speak. And Iā€™m certainly not going to say the authors didnā€™t have the experience of not having a mikveh available to themā€”I donā€™t know their lives, Iā€™m not going to police their experiences.
However, while Orthodox mikvahs are often still restricted to married women (who by virtue of the community will generally be cis and married to men) and potentially adult men (given the resources and customs, as mentioned above), there are plenty of more liberal mikvaā€™ot these days. Some even explicitly offer rituals for queer events! The list of reasons to go to the mikvah linked up above, for instance, includes:
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(Mayyim Hayyim, ā€œImmersion Ceremoniesā€)
Again, thatā€™s not to say there arenā€™t issues of queerphobia in the Jewish community, but if you are queer and want to go to the mikvah, there are options out there. If youā€™re looking, Iā€™ve included some links at the end.
When we make ritual, we are working with the divine forces of presence and intention. The magic of mikveh comes in making contact with water. Contact with water marks a threshold and functions as a portal to bring closer our ritual intention/the world to come.
This isā€¦a weird way to put things. I would say this is the start of the red flags. ā€œWhen we make ritual,ā€ first of all, is, to quote @the-library-alcove (who helped edit this), ā€œa turn of phrase that is not typically associated with any branch of Jewish practice; we have a lot--a LOT--of rituals, and while it's certainly not completely outside of the realm of Jewish vernacular, the tone here, especially in light of the later sections, starts veering towards the vernacular of neo-paganism.ā€ One might say ā€œmake kiddushā€ (the blessing over wine on Shabbos and holidays) or ā€œmake motziā€ (the blessing over bread), but not generally ā€œmake ritual.ā€
The next section is titled ā€œWho Gets to Do Mikveh?ā€ Their answer:
Everyone! Mikveh practice is available to all of us as a healing tool at any time.
The healing tool part isnā€™t the original purpose of mikveh, but there are some who have used it as a part of emotional recovery from something traumatic, by marking a new state of being free from whatever caused it, see for instance Mayyim Hayyimā€™s list linked above.
The ā€œeveryoneā€ bit is a little more complicated. To explain why, weā€™re going to skip ahead a little. (Some of these quotes will also be analyzed in full later.)
We want to make mikveh practice available as a tool to all Jews and non-Jews who want to heal wounds caused by white supremacy and colonialism. [..] To us, a queer mikveh welcomes anyone, regardless of spiritual background or not. [ā€¦] Queer mikveh is accessible physically and spiritually to any and all people who are curious about it. You don't have to be a practicing Jew to enter queer mikveh. You don't have to be Jewish. (pg. 2, emphasis added)
Now, I am told there are mikvaā€™ot that allow non-Jews to immerse. I have yet to find them, so I donā€™t know what rituals they allow non-Jews to do. I also havenā€™t been able to find any resources on non-Jews being allowed to immerse. I have found quite a few that explicitly prohibit it. If there are any sources you know of, please send them to me! Iā€™d love to see them! But so far everything I have come across has said that mikvah immersion is a closed practice that only Jews can participate in. (Technically, to quote the lovely @etz-ashashiot, any non-Jew can do mikvahā€¦once. And they wonā€™t be non-Jews when they emerge. There is also one very extreme edge-case, which is absolutely not mainstream knowledge or practice, and basically isnā€™t actually done. You can message me if youā€™re curious, but itā€™s really not relevant to thisā€“and even in that case, it is preferable to use a natural mikvah rather than a man-made one.)
If there are any legitimate sources that allow non-Jews to do a mikvah ritual, I would assume said non-Jews would be required to be respectful about it. Unfortunately, this is how the paragraph we began with continues:
Who Gets to Do Mikveh? Everyone! Mikveh practice is available to all of us as a healing tool at any time. You don't need any credentials. Your own wisdom is all the power you need to be a Jewish ritual leader. (emphasis added)
This is where we really go off the rails. First of all, you need more than ā€œwisdomā€ to lead a Jewish ritual. You need to actually know what youā€™re doing. You canā€™t just say ā€œoh you know what I feel like the right thing to do for morning prayers is to pray to the sun, because God created the sun so the sun is worth worshiping, and this is a Jewish ritual Iā€™m doing.ā€ Thatā€™s just idolatry. Like straight up I stole that from a midrash (oral tradition) about how humanity went from speaking with God in the Garden of Eden to worshiping idols in the time of Noah (given here by Maimonides; note that it continues for a few paragraphs after the one this link sends you to).
Second of all, this is particularly bad given this guide is explicitly to Jews and non-Jews. As @daughter-of-stories put it when she was going over an earlier draft of this analysis, ā€œthey are saying that non-Jews can just declare themselves Jewish ritual leaders based on nothing but their own ā€˜wisdom.ā€™ā€
I hope I donā€™t need to explain why thatā€™s extremely bad and gross?
While weā€™re on the topic of non-Jews using a mikvah, letā€™s take a moment to address an accusation commonly mentioned alongside the mikvah guide: that JVP also encourages (or encouraged) self-conversion.
I have been unable to find a separate document where they explicitly said so, or an older version of this document that does. This leads me to believe that either a) the accusation came from a misreading of this document, or b) there was a previous document that contained it which has since been deleted but was not archived in the Wayback Machine. EITHER is possible.
Even in the case that there was no such document, however, I would point out that such a suggestion can be readā€“intentionally or notā€“as implicit in this document. This is a guide for mikvah use by both Jews and non-Jews, and includes an idea that non-Jews can perform Jewish rituals on their own without any guidance or even background knowledge, as quoted above. Why would a non-Jew, coming into Jewish practice with very little knowledge, go looking to perform a mikvah ritual?
I would wager that the most well-known purpose of immersing in a mikvah is for the purpose of conversion.
Nowhere in this guide is there any explicit statement that you can do a self-conversion, but it also doesnā€™t say anywhere that you canā€™t, or that doing so is an exception to ā€œyou donā€™t need any credentialsā€ or ā€œyour own wisdom is all the power you need to be a Jewish ritual leader.ā€ It may not be their intention, but the phrasing clearly leaves it as an option.
Even if this were from a source that one otherwise loved, this would be upsetting and disappointing. The amount of exposure this document is getting may be at least in part because it comes from JVP, but the distress and dismay would be there regardless. If there is further vitriol, itā€™s only because JVP is often considered a legitimate source by outsiders, if no one elseā€“in other words, by the very people least likely to have the background to know that this document isnā€™t trustworthy. Itā€™s like the difference between your cousin telling you ā€œthe Aztecs were abducted by aliensā€ versus a mainstream news program like Fox reporting it. Both are frustrating and wrong, but one has significantly more potential harm than the other, and therefore is more likely to get widespread criticism (even if you complain about your cousin online).
On the other hand, as one of my editors pointed out in a moment of dark humor, they do say you donā€™t have to be Jewish to lead a Jewish ritual, so perhaps that mitigates this issue slightly by taking away a motivation to convert in the first place.
Returning to our document:
We do mikvahs in lakes, rivers, bathtubs, showers, outside in the rain, from teacups, and in our imaginations.
At this point the rails are but a distant memory.
In case youā€™ve forgotten what I said about this at the beginning of this post (and honestly I wouldnā€™t blame you, weā€™re on pg. 9 in my draft of this), there are extremely strict rules about what qualifies as a mikvah. Maimonidesā€™s Mishnah Torah, just about the most comprehensive codex of Jewish law, has eleven chapters on the topic of the mikvah (though that includes immersion in it as well as construction of it). Iā€™m not going to make you read through it, but letā€™s go through the list in this sentence:
Lakes and rivers: you might be able to use a river or lake as a mikvah, but you need to check with your local rabbinical authority, because not all of them qualify. In general, the waters must gather together naturally, from an underground spring or rainwater. In the latter case, the waters must be stationary rather than flowing. A river that dries up in a drought canā€™t be used, for instance. (The ocean counts as a spring, for this purpose.)
Bathtubs and showers: No. A man-made mikveh must be built into the ground or as an essential part of a building, unlike most bathtubs, and contain of a minimum of 200 gallons of rainwater, gathered and siphoned in a very particular way so as not to let it legally become ā€œgroundwater.ā€ Also, it needs to be something you can immerse in, which a shower is not.
Outside in the rain: No? How would you even do that?? What??
Teacups: Even if you were Thumblina or Kā€™tonton (Jewish Tom Thumb), and could actually immerse your entire body in a teacup, it wouldnā€™t be a kosher mikvah as a mivkah canā€™t be portable.
In your imagination: Obviously not, what the heck are you even talking about
We will (unfortunately) be coming back to the teacup thing, but for now suffice it to say most of these are extremely Not A Thing.
Mikveh has been continually practiced since ancient Judaism. It is an offering of unbroken Jewish lineage that we have claimed/reclaimed as our own.
I find the use of ā€œclaimed/reclaimedā€ fascinating here, given this guide is explicitly for non-Jewsā€”who, whether or not they are permitted to use a mikvah, certainly shouldnā€™t be claiming it as their ownā€”as well as Jews. I find it particularly interesting given the lack of clarity of how much of JVPā€™s membership is actually Jewish and JVPā€™s history of encouraging non-Jewish members to post ā€œas Jews.ā€ Kind of telling on yourselves a bit, there.
(Once again, Iā€™m not commenting on the authors themselves, but the organization they represent here and the audience they are speaking to/for.)
We want to make mikveh practice available as a tool to all Jews and non-Jews who want to heal wounds caused by white supremacy and colonialism. We want to make mikveh practice available for healing our bodies, spirits, and the earth.
Setting aside the ā€œJews and non-Jewsā€ thing, since I talked about that earlier and this is already extremely long, I do want to highlight the end of the paragraph. While there are some modern uses of the mikvah to (sort of) heal the spirit, I havenā€™t heard of anyone using a mikvah to heal the bodyā€”as a general rule Jews donā€™t tend to do faith healing, though of course some sects are the exception. Healing the earth, however, is absolutely not a use of a mikvah. Mikvah rituals, as weā€™ve now mentioned several times, are about tahara of a person or an object, and require immersion. You canā€™t immerse the earth in a mikvah. The earth contains mikvaā€™ot. Healing the earth with a mikvah is a very strange worship (IYKYK).
We acknowledge that not all beings have consistent access to water, including Palestinians.
This is a tragedy, no question. I don't mean to minimize that. However, it is also unrelated to the matter at hand. The Guide also doesnā€™t give any recommendations on how we can help improve water access, so this lip service is all you get.
A lack of water does not make mikveh practice inaccessible.
Yes, in fact, it does. Without a kosher mikvah of one variety or another one cannot do anything that requires a mikvah. Thatā€™s why building a kosher one is so important. I havenā€™t gone looking for it, but while Iā€™m sure thereā€™s lots (and lots and lots and lots) of Rabbinic responsa out there of what to do in drought situations, you definitely do need water in all but the most extreme cases. If you do not have water, AYLR (Ask Your Local Rabbi)--donā€™t do whatever this is.
The spirit of water can be present with us if we choose to call for water, so even when water is not physically available to us we can engage in mikveh practice.
This is just straight up avodah zarah (ā€œstrange worship,ā€ i.e. idolatry) as far as I can tell. The ā€œspirit of the waterā€? What? Weā€™re not Babylonians worshiping Tiamat. What source is there for this? Is there a source??
Like all material resources, the ways water is or is not available to us is shaped by our geographic and social locations. The ways we relate to water, what we decide is clean, treyf (dirty), drinkable, bathable, how much we use, how much we save, varies depending on our experiences. We invite you to decide what is clean and holy for your own body and spiritual practice.
This is going to require some breaking down.
To start with, letā€™s define ā€œtreyf.ā€ To quote myjewishlearning, ā€œTreyf (sometimes spelled treif or treyfe) is a Yiddish word used for something that is not kosher [lit. "fit"]. The word treyf is derived from the Hebrew word treifah, which appears several times in the Bible and means 'flesh torn by beasts.' The Torah prohibits eating flesh torn by beasts, and so the word treifah came to stand in for all forbidden foods.ā€
You may note the lack of the word ā€œdirtyā€ in this definition, or any other value judgments. Myjewishlearning continues, ā€œover time, the words kosher and treyf have been used colloquially beyond the world of food to describe anything that Jews deem fit or unfit.ā€ While this does have something of a value judgment, itā€™s still not ā€œdirty.ā€ I canā€™t say why the authors chose to translate the word this way, butā€¦I donā€™t like it.
Now, when it comes to what is kosher or treyf, food and drink are most certainly not based on ā€œour experiences.ā€ There are entire books on the rules of kashrut; it generally takes years of study to understand all the minutiae. Even as someone who was raised in a kosher household, when I worked as a mashgicha (kosher certification inspector) I needed special training. What is considered kadosh (ā€œsacredā€ or ā€œholy,ā€Ā  though again thatā€™s not a perfect translation) or tahor is also determined by very strict rules. We donā€™t just decide things based on ā€œvibes.ā€ Thatā€™s not how anything in Jewish practice works.
Water, in fact, is always kosher to drink unless it has bugs or something else treyf in it. And mikvehs arenā€™t even always what Iā€™d consider ā€œdrinkable;ā€ I always wash utensils Iā€™ve brought to the mikvah before I use them.
We come to our next heading: What is Queer Mikveh?
What is Queer Mikveh? To us, a queer mikveh welcomes anyone, regardless of spiritual background or not.
As Iā€™ve said above, I have yet to find a single source (seriously if you have one please send it to me) that says non-Jews can go to a mikvah. As one of my editors for this put it, ā€œto spin appropriation of Jewish closed practices as ā€˜queerā€™ is not only icky but deeply disrespectful to actual queer Jews.ā€
Also, and this is not remotely the point, but ā€œregardless of spiritual background or notā€ is almost incoherently poor writing.
As Jews in diaspora we want to share and use our ritual practices for healing the land and waters we are visitors on for the liberation of all beings.
I have tried to be semi-professional about this analysis, but. ā€œJews in the diaspora,ā€ you say. Tell me, JVP, where are we in the diaspora from? Hm? Where are we in diaspora from? Which land do we come from? Which land are we indigenous to, JVP? Do tell.
Returning to the point, I would repeat that mikvah has nothing to do with ā€œhealing the land and waters.ā€ Itā€™s ritual purification of whatever is immersed in it. You want to heal the land and waters? Go to your local environmental group, and/or whoever maintains your local land and waters. Pick up trash. Start recycling. Weed invasive species. Call your government and tell them to support green energy. You want liberation for all beings? Fight bigotryā€”including antisemitism. Judaism believes in actionā€”go act. Appropriating rituals from a closed religion doesnā€™t liberate anyone.
We have come up with this working definition and welcome feedback!
Oh good, maybe I wonā€™t be yelled at for posting this (she said dubiously).
Queer mikveh is a ritual of Jews in diaspora. We believe the way we work for freedom for all beings is by using the gifts of our ancestors for the greatest good. We bring our rituals as gifts.
I have nothing in particular new to say about this, except that I find the idea of ā€œbringing our rituals as giftsā€ for anyone to use deeply uncomfortable, given Judaism is a closed religion that strongly discourages non-Jews from joining us, and that has had literal millennia of people appropriating from us.
It acknowledges that our path is to live on lands that are not historically our peoples [sic] and we honor the Indigenous ancestors of the land we live on, doing mikveh as an anti-colonialist ritual for collective and personal liberation.
Again I would love so much for JVP to tell us which lands would historically be our peopleā€™s. What land do Jews come from, JVP? What land is it we do have a historical connection to? What land do our Indigenous ancestors come from??
And why does it have to be our path to live on lands other than that one?
Secondly, to quote the lovely @daughter-of-stories again when she was editing this, ā€œMikveh as anti-colonialism, aside from not being what Mikveh is, kinda implies that you can cleanse the land of the sins of colonialism. So (a) thatā€™s just a weird bastardization of baptism since, mikveh isnā€™t about cleansing from sin, and (b) so does that mean the colonialism is erased? Now we donā€™t have to actually deal with how it affects actual indigenous people?ā€
Iā€™m sure that (b) isnā€™t their intent, but I will say that once again they donā€™t give any material suggestions for how to actually liberate any collectives or persons from colonialism in this document, including any links to other pages on their own website*, which surely would have been easy enough. It comes across as very performative.
*I disagree strongly with most of their methods, but at least they are suggesting something.
Queer mikveh is a physical or spiritual space that uses the technologies of water and the Jewish practice of mikveh to mark transitions. Transition to be interpreted by individuals and individual ritual.
I have no idea what the ā€œtechnologies of waterā€ are. Also usage of a mikvah to mark transitions beyond ritual states is a fairly new innovation, as mentioned above.
Queer mikveh in it's [sic] essence honors the story of the water. The historical stories of the water we immerse in, the stories of our own bodies as water and the future story we vision [sic].
This just sounds like a pagan spinoff of baptism to me, if Iā€™m being honest. Which would be non-Jewish in several ways.
Queer mikveh is accessible physically and spiritually to any and all people who are curious about it. You don't have to be a practicing Jew to enter queer mikveh. You don't have to be Jewish.
First off, once again whether or not non-Jews can use mikvah seems at best extremely iffy. Secondly, accessibility in mikvaā€™ot is, as one of my editors put it, ā€œa continual discussion.ā€ We have records of discussions regarding access for those with physical disabilities going back at least to the 15th century (Shut Mahari Bruna, 106; as quoted in 50 Mikvahs That Shaped History by Rabbi Ephraim Meth), and in the modern era there are mikvaā€™ot that have lifts or other accessibility aids. That said, many mikvaā€™ot, especially older ones, are still not accessibleā€“and many mikvaā€™ot donā€™t have the money to retrofit or renovate. Mikvah.orgā€™s directory listings (linked at the end of this) notes whether various mikvaā€™ot are accessible, if you are looking for one in your area.Ā  If you want to help make mikvaā€™ot more accessible to the disabled, consider donating to an existing mikvah to help them pay for renovations or otherwise (respectfully) getting involved in the community. If you want to help make mikvaā€™ot more accessible for non-Orthodox Jews, try donating to an open mikvah (see link to a map of Rising Tide members at the end of this essay) or other non-Orthodox mikvah.
Queer mikveh is an earth and water honoring ritual.
Not even a little. We do have (or had) rituals that honor the earth or water, at least to an extentā€“the Simchat Beit HaShoā€™evah (explanations here and here) was a celebration surrounding water; most of our holidays are harvest festivals to some extent or another; there are a large number of agricultural mitzvahs (though most can only be done in Israel, which I suppose wouldnā€™t work for JVP). (Note: mitzvahs are commandments and/or good deeds.) Even those, though, arenā€™t about the water or earth on their own, per se, but rather about honoring them as Godā€™s gift to us. This description of mikvah sounds more Pagan or Wiccanā€“which is fine, but isnā€™t Jewish.
Queer mikveh exists whenever a queer person or queers gather to do mikveh. Every person is their own spiritual authority and has the power to create their own ritual for individual or collective healing.
Absolutely, anyone can create their own rituals for anything they want. But it probably wonā€™t be a mikvah ritual, and it probably wonā€™t be Jewish.
Do you know what itā€™s called when you make up your own ritual and claim that itā€™s actually a completely valid part of an established closed practice of which you arenā€™t part? (Rememberā€”this document is aimed just as much at non-Jews as at Jews.)
Itā€™s called appropriation.
With the next section, ā€œSome Ideas for Mikveh Preparation,ā€ we begin page three.
(Yes, weā€™re only on page three of seven. Iā€™m so sorry.)
The most important part of mikveh preparation is setting an intention.
This isnā€™t entirely wrong, as you do have to have in mind the intention of fulfilling a mitzvah when you perform one.
Because mikveh is a ritual most used to mark transitions, you can frame your intention in that way.
To quote myself above, ā€œusage of a mikvah to mark transitions beyond ritual states is a fairly new innovation.ā€ Iā€™d hardly say it is mostly used for marking transitions.
You can do journaling or talk with friends to connect with the Jewish month, Jewish holiday, Shabbat, the moon phase, and elements of the season that would support your intention.
If this were a guide for only Jews, or there was some sort of note saying this section was only for Jews, I would have less of a problem. But given neither is true, they are encouraging non-Jews to use the Jewish calendar for what is, from the rest of the descriptions in the Guide, a magical earth healing ritual.
This is 100% straight up appropriation.
The Jewish calendar is Jewish. Marking the new moon and creating a calendar was the first commandment given to us as a people, upon the exodus from Egypt. Nearly all our holidays are (aside from the harvest component, which is based on the Israeli agricultural seasons and required harvest offerings) based on specific parts of Jewish history. Passover celebrates the Exodus and our becoming a nation. Sukkot celebrates the Clouds of Glory that protected us in the desert. Shavuot celebrates being given the Torah.
According to some opinions, non-Jews literally arenā€™t allowed to keep Shabbat.
If you are a non-Jew and you are basing the collective earth healing ritual you have created under your own spiritual authority around Jewish holidays and calling it ā€œmikvah,ā€ you are appropriating Judaism.
Full stop.
This isnā€™t even taking into account the generally Pagan/witchy feel of the paragraph, with ā€œmoon phasesā€ and ā€œelements of the season.ā€ Again, if you want to be a Pagan be a Pagan, but donā€™t call it Jewish.
Things only go further downhill with their next suggestion for preparation before you go to the mikvah.
Divination: A lot can be said about divination practices and Judaism.
There certainly is a lot to be said. First and foremost, thereā€™s the fact that divination is forbidden in Judaism.
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(Screenshot of Leviticus 19:26 from sefaria.org)
One method of divination they suggest is Tarot, which is a European method of cartomancy that seems to have begun somewhere in the 19th century, though the cards start showing up around the 15th. While early occultists tried to tie it to various older forms of mysticism, including Kabbalah, this was, to put it lightly, complete nonsense. (Disclaimer: this information comes from wikipedia; Iā€™ve already spent so much time researching the mikvah stuff that I do not have the energy or interest to do a deep dive into the origin of Tarot. It isnā€™t Jewish, the rest is honestly just details.)
I have nothing against Tarot. I think itā€™s neat! The cards are often lovely! I have a couple of decks myself, and I use them for fun and card games. But divination via tarot is not Jewish. If I do any spreads, I make it very clear to anyone Iā€™m doing it with that it is for fun and/or as a self-reflection tool, not as magic. Because that is extremely not allowed in Judaism.
The authors suggest a few decks to use, one of which is by one of the authors themselves. Another is ā€œThe Kabbalah Deck,ā€ whichā€”holy appropriation, Batman!
In case anyone is unaware, Kabbalah (Jewish mysticism) is an extremely closed Jewish practice, even within Judaism. Traditionally it shouldnā€™t be studied by anyone who hasnā€™t already studied every other Jewish text (of which there are, I remind you, a lot), because itā€™s so easy to misinterpret. I mentioned this above briefly when explaining cultural expropriation. Pop Kabbalah (what Madonna does, what you see when they talk about ā€œAncient Kabbalistic Textsā€ on shows like Supernatural, the nonsense occultists and New-Agers like to say is ā€œancient Kabbalisticā€ whatever, itā€™s a wide span of appropriative BS) is gross, combining Kabbalah with Tarot is extremely gross. Iā€™m not 100% sure, as the link in the pdf doesnā€™t work, but I believe they are referring to this deck by Edward Hoffman. For those of you who donā€™t want to click through, the Amazon description includes this:
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(Screenshot from Amazon)
Returning to our text:
Another practice that's been used in Judaism for centuries is bibliomancy. You can use a book you find meaningful (or the Torah) and ask a question. Then, close your eyes, open the book to a page and place your finger down. Interpret the word or sentence you pointed at to help guide you to answer your question.
Bibliomancy with a chumash (Pentateuch) or tanach (Bible) in Jewish magic is kind of a thing, but the tradition of Jewish magic as a whole is very complicated and could be its own entirely different post. This one is already long enough. This usage of bibliomancy is clearly just appropriative new-age BS, though, especially given you can use ā€œ[any] book you find meaningful.ā€
Also, if you arenā€™t Jewish, please donā€™t use the Torah for ritual purposes unless you are doing it under very specific circumstances under the laws for Bā€™nei Noach (ā€œChildren of Noah,ā€ also called Righteous Gentiles; non-Jews who follow the 7 Noachide Laws).
Sit with your general intention or if you aren't sure, pose a question to the divination tool you are using. "What should be my intention for this mikveh?" "What needs transforming in my life?" "How can I transform my relationship with my body?"
As I hope Iā€™ve made clear, there are very specific times when one uses a mikvah, even with more modern Open Mikvah rituals. You always know what your intention is well before goingā€”to make yourself tahor, or mark a specific event. Iā€™m not here to police how someone prepares mentally before they immerseā€”meditation is fine, even encouraged. But magic? Like this? Thatā€™s not a thing. And given the fact that divination specifically is not only discouraged but forbidden, this section in particular upset a lot of Jews who read it.
Those of us already upset by everything weā€™ve already covered were not comforted by how the Guide continues.
How to Prepare Physically For Mikveh: Some people like to think about entering the mikveh in the way their body was when they were born. By this we mean naked, without jewelry, with clean fingernails and brushed hair. This framing can be meaningful for many people.
We went into this at the beginning of this essay (about 6500 words ago), but this is in fact how Jewish law mandates one is required to immerse. This is certainly the case in most communities, whether you are immersing due to an obligation (as a married woman or a bride about to be married) or due to custom (as men in post-Temple practice) or due to non-traditional immersion (as someone coming out); wherever on the spectrum of observance one falls (as far as I could find). A mikvah isnā€™t a bath, itā€™s not about physical cleanlinessā€”you must first thoroughly clean yourself, clip your nails, and brush your teeth. Nail polish and makeup are removed. There canā€™t be any barriers between you and the water. Most mikvaā€™ot these days, particularly womenā€™s mikvaā€™ot, have preparation rooms so you can prep on site. When you immerse, you have to submerge completelyā€”your hair canā€™t be floating above the water, your mouth canā€™t be pursed tightly, your hands canā€™t be clenched so the water canā€™t get to your palms. If you do it wrong, it doesnā€™t count and you have to do it again. Itā€™s not a ā€œframing,ā€ itā€™s a ritual practice governed by ritual law.
We suggest you do mikveh in the way you feel comfortable for you and your experience.
This isnā€™t how this works. If you have a particularly extreme case, you can talk to a rabbi to see if there are any workaroundsā€”for example, if excessive embarrassment would distract you from the ritual, you may be able to wear clothes that are loose enough that the water still makes contact with every millimeter of skin. But you need to consult with someone who knows the minutiae of the laws and requirements so you know if any exceptions or workarounds apply to you. Thatā€™s what a rabbi is for. Thatā€™s why they need to go to rabbinical school and get ordination. They have to study. Thatā€™s why you need to find a rabbi whose knowledge and personality you trust. For someone calling themselves a religious authority in Judaism to say ā€œyou can do whatever, no biggieā€ with such a critical ritual isā€¦Iā€™m not sure what the word I want is.
The idea is to feel vulnerable but also to claim your body as a powerful site of change that has the power to move us close to our now unrecognizable futures.
The idea is to bathe in the living waters and enter a state of taharah. Though that could be an idea you have in mind while you are doing it, I suppose. I could see at least one writer I know of saying something like this to specifically menstrual married (presumably cis) women performing Taharat HaMishpacha (family taharah, see above).
For some people, doing mikveh in drag will feel most vulnerable, with all your make-up and best attire.
Absolutely not a thing. As I said last paragraph, the goal isnā€™t to feel vulnerable or powerful or anything. It may feel vulnerable or powerful, but that is entirely besides the actual purpose of the ritual. What you get out of it on a personal emotional level has nothing to do with the religious goal of the religious practice.
And if you are wondering how one would submerge oneself in water in full drag, donā€™t worry, weā€™ll get there soon.
For some, wearing a cloth around your body until just before you dip is meaningful.
This is just how itā€™s usually done. Generally one is provided with a bathrobe, and one removes it before entering. You donā€™t just wander around the building naked. Or the beach, if youā€™re using the ocean.
If you were born intersex and your genitalia was changed without your consent, thinking about your body as perfect, however you were born, can be loving.
Iā€™m not intersex, so Iā€™m not going to comment on the specifics here. If you are and thatā€™s meaningful to you, more power to you.
We enter a new section, at the top of page 4.
Where To Do Mikveh: There is much midrash around what constitutes a mikveh.
ā€œMidrashā€ is not the word they want here. The midrash is the non-legal side of the oral tradition, often taking the form of allegory or parable. This is as opposed to the mishna, which is the halachic (legal) side of the oral tradition. They were both written down around the same time, but most midrashim (plural) are in their own books, rather than incorporated in the mishna.
There is, however, a great deal of rabbinic discussion, in the form of mishna, gemara, teshuvot (responsa), legal codices, and various other genres of Jewish writing. More properly this could have just said ā€œthere is much discussion around what constitutes a mikveh.ā€
Most mikvot currently exist in Orthodox synagogues[ā€”]
This is perhaps a minor quibble, but I donā€™t know that Iā€™d say theyā€™re generally in synagogues. They are frequently associated with a local congregation, but are often in a separate building.
[ā€”]but there is a growing movement to create more diverse and inclusive spaces for mikveh. Mayyim Hayyim is a wonderful resource with a physical body of water mikveh space. Immerse NYC is a newer organization training people of all genders to be mikveh guides. They also work to find gender inclusive spaces for people to do mikveh in NYC.
This is true! Mayyim Hayyim is a wonderful organization Iā€™ve never heard anything bad about, and ImmerseNYC also seems like an excellent organization. Both also only allow Jews (in which group I am including in-process converts) to immerse.
The mikveh guides thing I didnā€™t explain above, so Iā€™ll take a moment to do so here. Because the rules of immersion are so strict, and because itā€™s hard to tell if you are completely immersed when you are underwater, most mikvaā€™ot have a guide helping you. Depending on the circumstance and the mikvah, and depending on the patronā€™s comfort, who and how they do their jobs can differ somewhat. For a woman immersing after niddah, it will usually be another woman who will hold up the towel or bathrobe for you while you get in the water, and will only look from behind it once you are immersed to make sure you are completely submerged. If you are converting, customs vary. Some communities require men to witness the immersion regardless of the convertā€™s gender, which is very much an ongoing discussion in those communities. Even in those cases, to my knowledge they will only look once the convert is in the water, and there will likely still be a female attendant if the convert is a woman. While there are negative experiences people have had, it is very much an intra-community issue. Weā€™re working on it.
Mikveh can be done in a natural body of water.
Again, this is true, though not all bodies of water work, so AYLR (Ask Your Local Rabbi).
Some people are also making swimming pools holy places of mikveh.
Weā€™ve already explained above why this is nonsense.
In the Mishneh (the book that makes commentary on the torah [sic]) there are arguments as to what constitutes a mikveh and how much water from a spring or well or rainwater must be present.
The main issue in this section is their definition of the Mishneh. As I explained above, the Mishna (same thing, transliteration is not an exact science) is the major compilation of the Oral Torah, the oral tradition that was written down by Rabbi Judah Ha-Nasi so it wouldnā€™t be lost in the face of exile and assimilation. Itā€™s not so much a commentary on the (Written) Torah as an expansion of it to extrapolate the religious laws we follow. Itā€™s certainly not ā€œthe book that makes commentary on the Torah.ā€ We have literally hundreds of books of commentary. Thatā€™s probably underestimating. Jews have been around for a long time, and we have been analyzing and discussing the Torah for nearly as long. There are so many commentaries on the Torah.
The second issue is that while there are arguments in the Mishna and Gemara (the oral discussion on the Mishna that was written down even later), they do generally result in a final decision of some sort. Usually whichever side has the majority wins. Variations between communities are still very much a thing, and I can explain why in another post if people are interested, but there usually is a base agreement.
We are of the school that says you decide for yourself what works.
The phrasing they use here makes it sound as though thatā€™s a legitimate opinion in the Mishnah. I cannot emphasize how much that is not the case. While I myself have not finished learning the entire Mishnah, I would be willing to wager a great deal that ā€œwhatever works for youā€ isnā€™t a stance on any legal matter there. Thatā€™s just not how it works. While some modern branches of Judaism may have that as a position, it is definitely not Mishnaic.
If you are concerned about Jewish law, the ocean is always a good choice. There are no conflicting arguments about the ocean as a mikveh. As the wise maggid Jhos Singer says in reference to the ocean, "It's [sic] becomes a mikveh when we call it a mikveh." Done.
(To clarify, I donā€™t know if that typo was carried over from the source of the original quote or not.)
This is true. However if you are concerned about Jewish law I would very much urge you to look to other sources than this oneā€”be that your local rabbi or rebbetzen, the staff at your local mikvah, or a reliable website that actually goes into the proper requirements. If you want to use a mikveh according to Jewish law, please do not use this document as your guide.
We recognize immersion in water does not work for every body. Therefore, a guiding principle for where to do a mikveh is: do a mikveh in a place that is sacred to you. Your body is always holy and your body is made of mostly water. Later in this guide there is more information on mikveh with no immersion required.
I cannot emphasize how much I have never once heard this before. This, to me, reads like New Age nonsense. If you are unable to immerse in a mikvah, talk to your rabbi. Donā€™t doā€¦whatever this is.
Our next section is a short one.
Who To Do it With: Do mikveh with people you feel comfortable with and supported by.
This is fine, though many mikvaā€™ot (perhaps even most) will only allow one person to immerse at a time.
Do a solo mikveh and ask the earth body to be your witness.
With this, we return to the strange smattering of neo-Paganism. The ā€œearth bodyā€ is not a thing. Yes, the Earth is called as a witness in the Bible at least once. Itā€™s poetic. You also, unless you are converting, donā€™t actually need a witness anyway. A mikvah attendant or guide is there to help youā€”if you were somewhere without one, you could still immerse for niddah or various customary purposes.
Do mikveh with people who share some of your vision for collective healing.
As Iā€™ve said before in this essay, collective healing is not the point of a mikvah. If you are Jewish and want to pray for healing, there are plenty of legitimate places for thisā€“the Shemonah Esrei has a prayer for healing and a prayer where you can insert any personal prayers you want; thereā€™s a communal prayer for healing after the Torah reading. You can give charity or recite a psalm or do a mitzvah with the person in mind. You can also just do a personal private prayer with any words you like, a la Hannah, or if you want pre-written words find an appropriate techinah (not the sesame stuff). If you want to work towards collective liberation, volunteer. Learn the laws of interpersonal mitzvot, like lashon hara (literally ā€œevil speech,ā€ mostly gossip or libel). Connect fighting oppression to loving your neighbor or the Passover seder. We have tons of places for thisā€“mikvah isnā€™t one of them.
Next segment.
What To Bring to A Mikveh: 1. Intentions for the ritual for yourself and/or the collective.
See previous points on intention.
2. Items for the altar from your cultural background[ā€¦] (emphasis mine)
If I wasnā€™t appalled by the ā€œimmersing in makeupā€ or the ā€œdo divination first,ā€ this would be the place that got me. This is wrong on so many levels.
One is not allowed to have an altar outside of The Temple in Jerusalem, the one we currently do not have. Itā€™s an extremely big deal. One is not allowed to make sacrifices outside of the Temple. Period. This is emphasized again and again in the Torah and other texts. Even when we had a Temple, there were no altars in a mikvah.
And you certainly couldnā€™t offer anything in the Temple while naked, as one is required to be when immersing in the mikvah.
Even when we did bring offerings to altars (the Bronze Altar or the Gold Altar, both of which were in the Temple and which only qualified priests in a state of tahara could perform offerings on), the offerings were very specifically mandated, as per the Torah and those other texts. Even when non-Jews gave offerings (as did happen) they were required to comply. You couldnā€™t just bring any item from your cultural background. This is paganism, plain and simple.
Now, again, let me be clear: if youā€™re pagan, I have no problem with you. My problem is when one tries to take a sacred practice from a closed religion and try to co-opt it as oneā€™s own. Itā€™s a problem when someone who isnā€™t Native American decides to smudge their room with white sage, and itā€™s a problem when someone who isnā€™t Jewish tries to turn a mikvah into a pagan cleansing rite. And even if the person doing it is Jewish--I have an issue when itā€™s Messianics who were born Jewish, and I have an issue when itā€™s pagans who were born the same. Either way, whether you intend to or not, you are participating in appropriation or expropriation.
Which makes the line that follows this point so deeply ironic I canā€™t decide if Iā€™m furious or heartbroken.
After suggesting that the reader (who may or may not be Jewish) bring items for an altar to a mikvah, the Guide asks:
[ā€¦] (please do not bring appropriated items from cultures that are not yours).
Which is simply just... beyond parody. To quote one of my editors, ā€œThis is quickly approaching the level of being a new definition for the Yiddish word 'Chutzpah,' which is traditionally defined as 'absurdist audacity' in line with 'Chutzpah is a man who brutally murders both of his parents and then pleads with the judge for leniency because he is now an orphan bereft of parental guidance.' If not for the involved nature of explaining the full context, I would submit this as a potential new illustrative example.ā€
The next suggestion of what to bring is
3. Warm clothes, towels, warm drinks
All these are reasonable enough, though most mikvaā€™ot provide towels. Some also provide snacks, for while you are preparing. They may also not allow you to bring in outside food.
4. Your spirit of love, healing, and resistance
This, again, has nothing to do with mikvah. The only spirit of resistance in a mikvah is the fact that we continue to do it despite millennia of attempts to stop us. Additionally, to me at least ā€œa spirit of loveā€ feels very culturally-Christian.
Our next section is titled ā€œHow to Make Mikveh a Non-Zionist Ritual.ā€
Right off the bat, I have an issue with this concept. Putting aside for a moment whatever one may think of Zionism as a philosophy, my main problem here is that mikvah has nothing at all to do with Zionism. In Orthodoxy, at least, Jews who are against Zionism on religious grounds perform the mitzvah the same way passionately Zionist Jews do, with the same meanings and intentions behind it. It is performed the same way in Israel and out, and has been more or less the same for the last several thousand years. It is about ritual purification and sanctification of the mundane, no more and no less.
There is a word for saying anything and everything Jewish is actually about the modern Israel/Palestine conflict, simply because itā€™s Jewish.
That word is antisemitism.
How to Make Mikveh a Non-Zionist Ritual: Reject all colonial projects by learning about, naming & honoring, and materially supporting the communities indigenous to the land where you hold your mikveh. Name and thank the Indigenous people of the land you are going to do your mikveh on.
If you removed the ā€œnon-Zionistā€ description, this would be mostly unobjectionable. We should absolutely help indigenous communities. The framing of ā€œreject all colonial projectsā€ does seem to suggest that there is something colonial about the usual practice of going to the mikvah, though. I would argue that the mikvah is, in fact, anti-colonial if anythingā€”it is the practice of a consistently oppressed minority ethno-religion which has kept it in practice despite the best efforts of multiple empires. Additionally, while Zionism means many different things to those who believe in it, at its root most Zionists (myself included) define it as ā€œthe belief that Jews have a right to self-determination in our indigenous homeland.ā€ Our indigenous homeland being, of course, the land of Israel. (This is different from the State of Israel, which is the modern country on that land.) If you are a Jew in Israel, one of the indigenous peoples of the land your mikvah is on is your own. Thatā€™s not to say there arenā€™t othersā€”but to claim Jews arenā€™t indigenous to the region is to be either misinformed or disingenuous.
Take the time to vision [sic] our world to come in which Palestine and all people are free.
I really, really dislike how they use the concept of The World To Come here. The Jewish idea of The World To Come (AKA the Messianic Age) is one where the Messiah has come, the Temple has been rebuilt, and the Davidic dynastic monarchy has been re-established in the land of Israel. Arguably thatā€™s the most Zionist vision imaginable. This isnā€™t to say that all people, Palestinians included, wonā€™t be freeā€”true peace and harmony are also generally accepted features of the Messianic Age. But using the phrase in making something ā€œnon-Zionistā€ is, at the very least, in extremely poor taste. (As a side note, even religious non-Zionists believe in thisā€“thatā€™s actually why most of them are against the State of Israel, as they believe we canā€™t have sovereignty until the Messiah comes. They do generally believe we will eventually have sovereignty, just that now isnā€™t the time for it.)
Hold and explore this vision intimately as you prepare to immerse. What is one action you can take to bring this future world closer? Trust that your vision is collaborating with countless others doing this work.
Having a ā€œvisionā€ of a world where all are free isnā€™t doing any of the work to accomplish it. A ā€œvisionā€ canā€™t collaborate. At least not in Judaism. This sounds like one is trying to manifest the change through force of will, which is something directly out of the New Age faith movement, where it is known as ā€œCreative Visualization.ā€ Even when we do have a concept of bringing about something positive through an unrelated actionā€“like saying psalms for someone who is sickā€“the idea is that you are doing a mitzvah on their behalf, to add to their merits counted in their favor. Itā€™s not a form of magic or invocation of some mystical energy.
(Once again: I have nothing against pagans. But paganism is incompatible with Judaism. You canā€™t be both, any more than you can be Jewish and Christian.)
Use mikveh practice to ground into your contribution to the abundant work for liberation being done. We are many.
If you will once more pardon a brief switch to a casual tone:
Nothing says liberation like *checks notes* appropriating a minority cultural practice.
The next section of their document is titled ā€œIdeas for Mikveh Ritual,ā€ and this is where the Neo-Pagan and New Age influences of the authors truly shift from the background to the foreground.Ā Ā 
We start off deceptively reasonably.
Mikveh ritual is potentially very simple. Generally people consider a mikveh to be a full immersion in water, where you are floating in the water, not touching the bottom, with no part of the body above the surface (including the hair).
Technically, most people consider a mikveh to be a ritual bath (noun) in which one performs various Jewish ritual immersions. But if we set this aside as a typo, this isā€¦fairly true. What they are describing is how one is supposed to perform the mitzvah of mikveh immersion. However, in much the same way I wouldnā€™t say ā€œgenerally people consider baseball to be a game where you hit a ball with a bat and run around a diamond,ā€ I wouldnā€™t say itā€™s a case of ā€œgenerally people considerā€ so much as ā€œthis is what it is.ā€
This works for some people. It doesn't work for everyone and it doesn't work for all bodies. Because of this, mikveh ritual can be expanded outside of these traditional confines in exciting, creative ways.
Once again, if you are incapable of performing mikvah immersion in the proper manner, please go speak with a rabbi. Please do not follow this guide.
Before we continue, I would just like to assure you that. whatever ā€œexciting, creative waysā€ you might be imagining the authors have come up with, this is so much worse.
Method One:
Sound Mikveh: One way that's felt very meaningful for many is a "sound mikveh." This can be a group of people toning, harmonizing, or chanting in a circle. One person at a time can be in the center of the circle and feel the vibrations of healing sound wash over their body. Another method of sound mikveh is to use a shofar or other instrument of your lineage to made [sic] sounds that reach a body of water and also wash over you.
This makes me so uncomfortable I barely have the words to describe it, and I know that I am not alone in this. This is not a mikvah. If someone wants to do some sort of sound-based healing ritual, by all means go ahead, but do not call it a mikvah. This is not Jewish. I donā€™t know what this is, aside from deeply offensive.
And leave that poor shofar out of this. That ram did not give his horn for this nonsense.
(I could go on about the actual sacred purpose of a shofar and all the rules and reasons behind it that expand upon this, but this is already over 9000 words.)
Method Two is, if anything, worse. This is the one, if youā€™ve seen social media posts about this topic, you have most likely seen people going nuts about.
Tea Cup Mikveh: Fill a special teacup. If you want, add flower essence, a small stone, or other special elements. Sing the teacup a sweet song, dance around it, cry in some tears, tell the cup a tender and hopeful story, hold the teacup above the body of your animal friend for extra blessing, balance it on your head to call in your highest self. Use the holy contents of this teacup to make contact with water.
This is absolutely 100% straight-up neo-pagan/New Age mysticism. Nothing about this is based on Jewish practice of any kind. Again, Iā€™m at a loss for words of how to explain just how antithetical this is. If you want to be a witch, go ahead and be a witch. But do not call it Jewish. Leave Judaism out of this.
They end this suggestion with the cute comment,
Mikveh to go. Weā€™ve always been people on the move.
Let me explain why this ā€œfunā€ little comment fills me with rage.Ā 
As you may recall, this document was published by Jewish Voice for Peace. Among their various other acts of promoting and justifying antisemitism, JVP has repeatedly engaged in historical revisionism regarding Jews and Jewish history. In this context, they have repeatedly ignored the numerous expulsions of Jews from various countries, and blaming sinister Zionist plots to explain any movement of expelled Jews to Israel (ā€œIn the early 1950s, starting two years after the Nakba, the Israeli government facilitated a mass immigration of Mizrahim,ā€ from ā€œOur Approach to Zionismā€ on the JVP website; see @is-the-thing-actually-jewishā€™s post on JVP and the posts linked from there).
So a document published by JVP framing Jewish movement as some form of free spirited 1970s-esque Bohemian lifestyle or the result of us being busy movers-and-shakers is a direct slap in the face to the persecution weā€™ve faced as a people and society.Ā  No, we arenā€™t ā€œon the moveā€ because weā€™re hippies wandering where the wind takes us . Weā€™re always on the move because we keep getting kicked out and/or hate-crimed until we leave.
But there is no Jew-hatred in Ba Sing Se.
Method three:
Fermentation Mikveh: Some food goes through natural changes by being immersed in water. If we eat that food, we can symbolically go through a change similar to the one the food went through.
Again, this has no basis anywhere in halacha. We do have concepts of ā€œyou are what you eat,ā€ specifically with reference to what animals and birds are kosher, but there isnā€™t any food that makes you tahor if you eat it. In the Temple days there were, in fact, foods you couldnā€™t eat unless you were tahor.
Jews may like pickles, but that doesnā€™t mean we think they purify you.
Also, the change from fermentation is, if anything, the opposite of the change we would want. Leavening (rising in dough or batter, due to the fermentation of yeast) is compared in rabbinic writings to arrogance and ego, as opposed to the humility of matza, the ā€œpoor manā€™s breadā€ (see here, for example). Is the suggestion here to become more egotistical?
As we wrap up this section, Iā€™d like to go back to their stated reason for using these ā€œalternativeā€ methods (ā€œIt doesn't work for everyone and it doesn't work for all bodiesā€), and ask: if these really were the only options for immersion, would these really fill that same spiritual need/niche? These obviously arenā€™t aimed at me, but from my perspective it seems almost condescending, almost worse. ā€œYou canā€™t do the real thing, so weā€™ll make up something to make you feel better.ā€ If any of them had an actual basis in Jewish practice, that would be one thing, but this just feelsā€¦fake, to me. Even within more liberal / less traditional streams of Judaism, there is a connection to halacha:Ā 
ā€œWe each (if we are knowledgeable about the tradition, if we confront it seriously and take its claims and its wisdom seriously) have the ability, the freedom, indeed the responsibility to come to a [potentially differing] personal understanding of what God wants us to doā€¦ [Halacha] is a record of how our people, in widely differing times, places and societal circumstances, experienced God's presence in their lives, and responded. Each aspect of halacha is a possible gateway to experience of the holy, the spiritual. Each aspect worked for some Jews, once upon a time, somewhere in our history. Each, therefore, has the potential to open up holiness for people in our time as well, and for me personally. However, each does not have equal claim on us, on meā€¦Portions of the halacha whose main purpose seems to be to distance us from our surroundings no longer seem functional. Yet some parts of the halachic tradition seem perfect correctives to the imbalances of life in modernityā€¦In those parts of tradition, we are sometimes blessed to experience a sense of God's closeness. In my personal life, I emphasize those areas. And other areas of halacha, I de-emphasize, or sometimes abandon. Reform Judaism affirms my right, our right, to make those kinds of choices.ā€ ā€“ Rabbi Ramie Arian
ā€œ[Traditional Reconstructionist Jews] believe that moral and spiritual faculties are actualized best when the individual makes conscious choicesā€¦The individualā€™s choices, however, can and should not be made alone. Our ethical values and ritual propensities are shaped by the culture and community in which we live. Living a Jewish life, according to the Reconstructionist understanding, means belonging to the Jewish people as a whole and to a particular community of Jews, through which our views of life are shaped. Thus, while Reconstructionist communities are neither authoritarian nor coercive, they aspire to influence the individualā€™s ethical and ritual choicesā€“through study of Jewish sources, through the sharing of values and experiences, and through the impact of the climate of communal opinion on the individual. ā€¦While we may share certain values and life situations, no two sets of circumstances are identical. We hope that the Reconstructionist process works to help people find the right answers for themselves, but we can only assist in helping individuals to ask the right questions so that their choices are made in an informed way within a Jewish context. To be true to ourselves we must understand the differences in perception between us and those who have gone before, while retaining a reverence for the traditions they fashioned. If we can juxtapose those things, we ensure that the past will have [in the phrase of Reconstructionismā€™s founder, Mordecai Kaplan,] a vote, but not a veto.ā€ ā€“ Rabbi Jacob J. Straub (Note: the Reconstructionist movement was founded in the late 1920s, and has gone through a very large shift in the past decade or so. I use ā€œTraditionalā€ here to refer to the original version of the movement as opposed to those who have shifted. Both are still called Reconstructionist, so itā€™s a bit confusing. This is on the advice of one of my editors, who is themself Traditional Reconstructionist.)
You may note, neither of these talk about inventing things from whole cloth. To paraphrase one of my editors, ā€œYou donā€™t completely abandon [halacha], because if you did how would you have a cohesive community? Even in a ā€˜do whatā€™s meaningfulā€™ framework, youā€™re taking from the buffet, not bringing something to a potluck. Even if you donā€™t see halacha as binding, there are limits.ā€
(Again, disclaimer that the above knowledge of non-Orthodox movements comes from my editors, and any errors are mine.)
The next section is ā€œPrayers for Mikveh.ā€
As a note, Iā€™m going to censor the names of God when I quote actual blessings, as per traditional/Halachic practice. Iā€™ll be putting brackets to indicate my alterations.
Iā€™m not going to go much into detail here, because frankly my Hebrew isnā€™t good enough, and the six different people I asked for help gave me at least six different answers, but I will touch on it a bit.
First, the Guide gives a link to an article on Traditional Mikveh Blessings from Ritualwell (here is a link on the Wayback Machine, since the original requires you to make an account). Ritualwell is a Reconstructionist Jewish website, and accepts reviewed submissions. Here is their about page. The blessings on this page, as far as I know, are in fact exactly what it says on the tin. Iā€™m not sure the first one, asher kidshanu bā€™mitzvotav vā€™tzivanu al ha-tā€™vilah, is said for non-obligatory immersions (i.e. not for niddah or conversion), as it is literally a blessing on the commandment. The second blessing at that link is Shehecheyanu, which the Guide also suggests as a good prayer. This is the traditional form of the blessing, given at Ritualwell:
Baruch Atah Ado[-]nai Elo[k]eynu Melech Ha-Olam shehekheyanu vā€™kiyimanu vā€™higiyanu lazman hazeh.
Blessed are You, [LORD] our God, Monarch of the universe, Who has kept us alive and sustained us, and brought us to this season.
(As a quick note, you may notice this is not quite how they translate it on Ritualwellā€“I have no idea why they say ā€œkept me alive,ā€ as itā€™s definitely ā€œusā€ in the Hebrew. Thereā€™s a long tradition, in fact, of praying for the community rather than ourselves as an individual, but thatā€™s not the point of this post.)
The Guide, however, gives an alternate form:
Bā€™rucha At y[-]a Elo[k]eynu Ruakh haolam shehekheyatnu vā€™kiyimatnu vā€™higiyatnu lazman hazeh. You are Blessed, Our God, Spirit of the World, who has kept us in life and sustained us, enabling us to reach this season.
Under the assumption that most of you donā€™t know Hebrew, Iā€™m going to break this down further. The main difference between these two is grammatical genderā€“the traditional blessing uses masculine forms, which is common when referring to God. However, while there are often masculine descriptions of God, it is worth noting that Hashem is very specifically not a ā€œmanā€--God is genderless and beyond our comprehension, and masculine is also used in Hebrew for neutral or unspecified gender. A whole discussion of gender and language is also beyond the scope of this post, but for now letā€™s leave it at: changing the gender for God in prayer is pretty common among less traditional Jews, and thatā€™s fine. Some of the changes they make (or donā€™t make) here are interesting, though. The two letter name of God they switch to isā€“despite ending in a hey (the ā€œhā€ letter)ā€“not feminine grammatically feminine. Iā€™m told, however, that some progressive circles consider it neutral because it ā€œsounds feminine.ā€ ā€œElo-keynuā€ is also grammatically masculine, but a) thatā€™s used for neuter in Hebrew and b) itā€™s also technically plural, so maybe they didnā€™t feel the need to change it. Though if thatā€™s the case I would also have thought that Ado-nai (the tetragrammaton) would be fine, as itā€™s also technically male in the same way. Iā€™m also not sure why they didnā€™t just change ā€Melech HaOlamā€ to ā€œMalkah HaOlam,ā€ which would be the feminine form of the original words, but perhaps they were avoiding language of monarchy. Itā€™s apparently a not uncommon thing to change.
One of the responses I got said the vowels in the verbs were slightly off, but I canā€™t say much above that, for the reasons given at the beginning of this section.
Also, and this is comparatively minor, the capitalization in the transliteration is bizarre. They capitalize ā€œAtā€ (you) and ā€œElo[k]eynuā€ (our God), but not ā€œy[-]aā€¦ā€ which is the actual name of God in the blessing and should definitely be capitalized if you are capitalizing.
The Guide next gives a second blessing that can be used:
Bā€™rucha at shekhinah eloteinu ruach ha-olam asher kid-shanu bi-tevilah bā€™mayyim hayyim. Blessed are You, Shekhinah, Source of Life, Who blesses us by embracing us in living waters. -Adapted by Dori MidnightĀ 
The main thing I want to note about this is thatā€¦thatā€™s not an accurate translation. It completely skips the word ā€œeloteinu.ā€ ā€œRuach ha-olamā€ means ā€œspirit/breath of the universe/world,ā€ not ā€œSource of Life,ā€ which would be ā€œMā€™kor Ha-Olam,ā€ as mentioned above. ā€œKid-shanu,ā€ as she transliterates it, means ā€œhas sanctified us,ā€ or ā€œhas made us holy,ā€ not ā€œblesses usā€--both the tense and the word are wrong. ā€œBi-tevilahā€ doesnā€™t mean ā€œembracing us,ā€ either, it means ā€œwith immersing.ā€ In full, the translation should be:
ā€œBlessed are You, Shekhinah, our God, Spirit of the World, Who has sanctified us with immersion in living waters.ā€
The Shekhinah is an aspect/name of God(dess), though not a Name to the same level as the ones that canā€™t be taken in vain. It refers to the hidden Presence of God(dess) in our world, and is the feminine aspect of God(dess), inasmuch as God(dess) has gendered aspectsā€“remember, our God(dess) is One. Itā€™s not an unreasonable Name to use if you are trying to make a prayer specifically feminine.
(Though do be careful if you see it used in a blessing in the wild, because Messianics use it to mean the holy ghost.)
ā€œEloteinuā€ is, grammatically, the feminine form of Elokeinu (according to the fluent speakers I asked, though again I got several responses).
It is, again, odd that they donā€™t capitalize transliterated names of God, though here there is more of an argument that itā€™s a stylistic choice, Hebrew not having capital letters.
The Guide then repeats the link for Ritualwell.
Finally, we come to the last section, ā€œResources and Our Sources:ā€
First, they credit the Kohenet Institute and two of its founders. I do not want to go on a deepdive into the Kohenet Institute also, as this is already long enough, but I suppose I should say a bit.
The Kohenet Institute was a ā€œclergy ordination program, a sisterhood / siblinghood, and an organization working to change the face of Judaism. For 18 years, Kohenet Hebrew Priestess Institutes founders, graduates and students reclaimed and innovated embodied, earth-based feminist Judaism, drawing from ways that women and other marginalized people led Jewish ritual across time and spaceā€ (Kohenet Hebrew Priestess Institute Homepage). It closed in 2023.
I have difficulty explaining my feelings about the Kohenet Institute. On the one hand, the people who founded it and were involved in it, Iā€™m sure, were very invested in Judaism and very passionate in their belief. As with the authors of the Guide, I do not mean to attack themā€“Iā€™m sure theyā€™re lovely people.
On the other, I have trouble finding a basis for any of their practices, and most of what practices I do find trouble meā€“again, with the caveat that I am very much not into mysticism, so take my opinion with a grain of salt.
Of the three founders, only one (Rabbi Jill Hammer) seems to have much in the way of scholarly background. Rabbi Hammer, who was ordained at the Jewish Theological Seminary (a perfectly respectable school), has at least one article where she quotes the New Testament and a Roman satirist making fun of a Jewish begger who interpret dreams for money as proof ā€œthat Jewish prophetesses existed in Roman times,ā€ which to me at least seems like saying that the Roma have a tradition of seeresses based on racist caricatures of what they had to do to survive, if youā€™ll pardon the comparison. In the same article, she says that Sarah and Abigail, who are listed in the Talmud as prophetesses ā€œare not actually prophetesses as I conceptualize them here,ā€ (pg 106) but that ā€œabolitionist Ernestine Rose, anarchist Emma Goldman, and feminist Betty Friedan stand in the prophetic tradition.ā€ Given God says explicitly in the text, ā€œRegarding all that Sarah tells you, listen to her voiceā€ (Genesis 21:12), I have no idea where she gets this.
The second founder, Taya MĆ¢ Shere, describes the Institute on her website as ā€œspiritual leadership training for women & genderqueer folk embracing the Goddess in a Jewish context,ā€ which to me is blatantly what I and some of my editors have taken to calling Jews For Lilith. Now, it is possible this is a typo. However assuming it is not, and it would be a weird typo to have, this rather clearly reads as ā€œthe Goddessā€ being something one is adding a Jewish context toā€“which is exactly what I mean when I say this guide is taking Paganism and sprinkling a little Judaism on it. If it had said ā€œembracing Goddess in a Jewish context,ā€ Iā€™d have no problem (aside from weird phrasing)--but ā€œthe Goddessā€ is very much a ā€œdivine feminine neo-paganā€ kind of thing. We donā€™t say ā€œthe Godā€ in Judaism, or at least Iā€™ve never heard anyone do so. We just say God (or Goddess), because thereā€™s only the one. In fact, according to this article, she returned to Judaism from neo-Paganism, and ā€œbegan to combine the Goddess-centered practices she had co-created in Philadelphia with what she was learning from teachers in the Jewish Renewal movement, applying her use of the term Goddess to Judaismā€™s deity.ā€ The ā€œGoddess-centered practicesā€ and commune in Philadelphia are described earlier in the article as ā€œinfluenced by Wiccan and Native American traditions, in ways that Shere now considers appropriative (ā€œAfter Kohenet, Who Will Lead the Priestesses?ā€ by Noah Phillips).ā€ Iā€™m not sure how it suddenly isnā€™t appropriative now, but taking the Pagan practices you were doing and now doing those exact same rituals ā€œbut Jewishā€ is, in fact, still Pagan.
Shere also sells ā€œDivining Pleasure: An Oracle for SephErotic Liberation,ā€ created by her and Bekah Starr, which is a ā€œdivination card deck and an Omer counter inviting you more deeply into your body, your pleasure and your devotion to collective liberation.ā€
I hate this.
I hate this so much.
For those who donā€™t know, the Omer is the period between the second day of Passover and the holiday of Shavuot, 50 days later. Itā€™s named for the Omer offering that was given on Passover, and which started the count of seven weeks (and a day, the day being Shavuot). The Omer, or at least part of it, is also traditionally a period of mourning, much like the Three Weeks between the fasts of the 17th of Tammuz and the 9th of Avā€“we donā€™t have weddings, we donā€™t listen to live music, we donā€™t cut our hair. It commemorates (primarily) the deaths of 24,000 students of Rabbi Akiva in a plague (possibly a metaphor for persecution or the defeat of the Bar Kochba revolt). It is often used as a time for introspection and self-improvement, using seven of the Kabbalistic Sephirot as guides (each day of the week is given a Sephira, as is each week, so each day of the 49 is x of y, see here). Itā€™s not, as Shereā€™s class ā€œSex and the Sephirot: A Pleasure Journey Through the Omerā€ puts it, a time to ā€œengageā€¦toward experiencing greater erotic presence, deepening our commitment to nourishing eros, and embracing ritual practices ofā€¦pleasure.ā€
The final of the founders, Shoshana Jedwab, seems to be primarily a musician. In her bio on her website, scholarship and teaching are almost afterthoughts. I can find nothing about her background or classes. Sheā€™s also, from what Iā€™ve found, the creator of the ā€œsound mikvah.ā€
So all in all, while Iā€™m sure theyā€™re lovely people, I find it difficult to believe that they are basing their Institute on actual practices, particularly given they apparently include worship of Ashera as an ā€œauthenticā€ Jewish practice, see the above Phillips article and this tumblr post.
The institute also lists classes they offered, which ā€œwere open to those across faith practices - no background in Judaism necessary.ā€ If you scroll down the page, you will see one of these courses was titled ā€œSefer Yetzirah: Meditation, Magic, & the Cosmic Architecture.ā€ Sefer Yetzirah, for those of you unaware, ā€œis an ancient and foundational work of Jewish mysticism.ā€
You may recall my saying something some 5700 (yikes) words ago about Jewish mysticism (i.e. Kabbalah) being a closed practice.
You may see why I find the Kohenet Institute problematic.
I will grant, however, that I have not listened to their podcasts nor read their books, so it is possible they do have a basis for what they teach. From articles Iā€™ve read, and what Iā€™ve found on their websites, I am unconvinced.
Returning to our original document, the Guide next gives several links from Ritualwell, which Iā€™ve already discussed above. After those, they give links to two actual mikvah organizations: Mayyim Hayyim and Immerse NYC. Both are reputable organizations, and are Open Mikvahs. Neither (at least based on their websites) seem to recommend any of the nonsense in this Guide. In fact, Mayyim Hayyim explicitly does not allow non-Jews to immerse (unless itā€™s to convert). ImmerseNYC has advice to create a ritual in an actually Jewish way. I would say the link to these two groups are, perhaps, the only worthwhile information in this Guide.
They then list a few ā€œmikveh related projects,ā€ two of which are by the writers. The first, Queer Mikveh Project, is by one of the authors, Rebekah Erev. The link they give is old and no longer works, but on Erevā€™s website there is information about the project. Much of the language is similar to that in this guide. The page also mentions a ā€œmikvahā€ ritual done to protest the Dakota Access Pipeline, in which ā€œthe mikvehā€¦[was] completely optional.ā€ And, of course, there was an altar. The second project, the ā€œGay Bathhouseā€ by (I believe) the other author and Shelby Handler, is explicitly an art installation.
The final link is to this website (thanks to the tumblr anon who found it), which is the only source weā€™ve been able to find on Shekinah Ministries (aside from a LOT of Messianic BS from unrelated organizations of the same name). So good newsā€“this isnā€™t a Messianic. Bad news, it also seems to have a shaky basis in actual Jewish practice at best. It is run by artist Reena Katz, aka Radiodress, whose MKV ritual is, like ā€œGay Bathhouse,ā€ a performance project. As you can see from the pictures on Radiodressā€™s website (cw for non-sexual nudity and mention of bodily fluids), it is done in a clearly portable tub in a gallery. As part of the process, participants are invited to ā€œadd any material from their body,ā€ including ā€œspit, urine, ejaculate, menstrual blood,ā€ ā€œany medication, any hormones they might be taking,ā€ and supplies Radiodress offers including something called ā€œMalakh Shmundie,ā€ ā€œa healing tincture that translates to ā€œangel pussyā€ made by performance artist Nomy Lammā€ (quotes from ā€œAn Artistā€™s Ritual Bath for Trans and Queer Communitiesā€ by Caoimhe Morgan-Feir). The bath is also filled by hand, which is very much not in line with halacha. Which, if youā€™re doing performance art, is fine.
But this Guide is ostensibly for authentic Jewish religious practice.
And with that (aside from the acknowledgements, which I donā€™t feel the need to analyze), we are done. At last.
Thank you for reading this monster of a post. If you have made it this far, you and I are now Family. Grab a snack on your way out, you deserve it.
Further Reading and Resources:
https://www.mayyimhayyim.org/risingtide/members/
https://www.mikvah.org/directory
https://www.mayyimhayyim.org/
http://www.immersenyc.org/
https://aish.com/what-is-a-mikveh/
https://www.chabad.org/theJewishWoman/article_cdo/aid/1541/jewish/The-Mikvah.htm
https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/1230791/jewish/Immersion-of-Vessels-Tevilat-Keilim.htm
https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/why-immerse-in-the-mikveh/
Meth, Rabbi Ephraim. 50 Mikvahs That Shaped History. Feldheim Publishers, 2023.
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shepscapades Ā· 3 months ago
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Shep. Shep how tall is Ex. Xisumas both looking up to see him AND youā€™re saying his design is taller than before??? How imposing is the evil doofus, the people need to know!
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Hahahahahahahahaha Xisuma is 6ā€™2 hahahahaha
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002yb Ā· 5 months ago
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Jasonā€™s ā€œplease donā€™t pull out I have abandonment issuesā€ vs Dickā€™s ā€œnot pulling out because I have separation anxietyā€
( Ė¶Ā°ć…Ā°) !!
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azu1as Ā· 6 months ago
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Hi, Tin! I love your writing and I have a prompt for you, if you are interested) what if Tang family is too afraid of Tang Bo leaving permanently and eloping with Cheong Myeong? So they initiate marriage negotiations with Mount Hua. It can be angst (CM is socially isolated and insecure about his position) or romantic comedy (awkward situations and protective Cheong Mun), up to you). Thank you in advance!
It was a well-established fact that the Dark Saint of the Tang Family was one of their generation's best.
So it came as no surprise when an influx of marriage proposals flooded their family's estateā€”because rumors started flying around that the Dark Saint was in search of a partner.
The Dark Saint held a reputation for being cold and ruthless. To cultivators and martial artists, he was someone they feared making into an enemy due to his sheer battle prowess and poisonous abilities. To normal civilians, he was a genius who wielded the Tang Family's techniques with cool precision and intent; to them, he was just another mysterious cultivator that they would only ever know of through gossip and stories.
However, in recent years, something shifted. His reputation among common folk was slowly altered. It started off with a supposed battle between him and the Plum Blossom Sword Saint which turned into a sudden and unexpected friendship.
Whereas in the past the Dark Saint would only go around Sichuan and closeby villages, he was now found going around different major cities and unknown ones.
He was often in the company of Mount Hua's Plum Blossom Sword Saint, who worked with him side-by-side to eradicate groups from the Demonic Cult and the occasional bandits and thieves.
For supposed Taoists, the two visited different establishments to drink alcohol and talk cheerily. It was during one of these moments that the first rumor began its spark.
"Ahhhh," The Plum Blossom Sword Saint groans in satisfaction. "That sure hits the spot!"
The Dark Saint chuckles as he tosses back his own drink. "If only I could enjoy everyday like this. Alcohol really is the best."
"What would your future wife think?" The Plum Blossom Sword Saint jokingly and dramatically shakes his head in disappointment. "To have a husband who loves alcohol more than his own wife...!"
The Dark Saint wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. "Trust me, I would make sure that my wife knows full-well just how much I love them."
The two of them share a silent, private conversation with just their eyes alone, that none of the other restaurant's customers could decipher, before they leave a generous tip and went on their way.
It snowballs from there.
All of a sudden gossip went around about the Dark Saint's interest in finding a wife. And so several people came to the same conclusion.
The reason why the Dark Saint is travelling around more than usual is because he's looking for a prospective wife.
Clearly, the Plum Blossom Sword Saint was there to provide moral support. How truly admirable and strong their brotherhood must be!
On the other hand, the head of the Tang Family was fully aware of their Dark Saint's single-minded interest in Mount Hua's Chung Myung.
Seeing all the stacks of letters that ranged from proposing strategic alliances and general marriage offers brought the current head of the Tang Family to a very different conclusion.
Tang Bo was trying to slowly draw himself away from their family by leaving their estate. He might be on the hunt, jumping from village to village, trying to create a dowry befitting for the hand of the Plum Blossom Sword Saint and scouting out all the best locations to settle down in.
It really wouldn't be too surprising of an idea if one day a letter turns up from the man with an intent of permanently moving to Mount Hua or some backwater village.
The Tang Family head shakes the thought of losing one of their best and genius members to one of the Ten Great Sects. If he wanted to maintain their family's reputation, he'll need to strike the first move.
And so he begins to pen a decisive letter to the Sect Leader of Mount Hua.
%%%
Chung Mun's hands tremble as reads the letter sent to him by the Tang Family.
'Who did they think they were?' He would have bit out if he had any less self-restraint. The paper crumples in his grip and he receives a questioning glance from Chung Myung who was sprawled eating mooncakes on the opposite side of his desk.
"What's got you so worked up?" The subject of the letter askswithout a care.
Chung Mun takes a deep breath. "The Tang Family wishes for you to transfer into their estate."
He refuses to say out loud the marriage proposal that came along with this request. His Chung Myung was too young! The man might be a sixty years old, but that round face, cheeks carelessly bulging with mooncakes with crumbs littered on his chin, screamed too young for marriage!
"Oh." Chung Myung nods in understanding.
Chung Mun is glad that Chung Myung agrees that this was nonsensical. To think, they thought that Chung Myung would even leave Mount Hua forā€”
"After the war is over, Tang Bo and I were planning to be roommates and travel the world a bit."
ā€”?????
"Roommates?" Chung Mun's voices comes out slightly strangled.
"Yup. It's going to be great."
"No."
"'No'?"
Chung Mun tries to run through his previous conversations with Tang Bo. He knew that the man was capable of being underhanded, but he was also well-aware that Tang Bo respected him enough to not blind-side him with something like this. Especially since it concerned Chung Myung.
...
...Oh no.
"Fuck." Chung Mun says, full of feeling as he recalls Tang Bo off-handedly asking permission to live together with Chung Myung in the future.
"...Sect Leader?"
Chung Mun had thought that was a joke! He thought Tang Bo wasn't being serious! They were talking with alcohol in their systems!
The alarmed look that crosses Chung Myung's face informed Chung Mun that the way he felt his blood drain from his face was a visible, physical reaction.
"He asked for your hand in marriage." Chung Mun says faintly. "I said yes."
Chung Myung blinked at him. "Yeah? He told me?"
Okay. Tang Bo, to his credit, hasn't been leaving Chung Myung in the dark at least.
If Chung Myung knows and isn't reacting violently that means that he isn't completely against this. Even if Chung Mun was, he had to reorganize his priorties.
And his number one would be to make sure Chung Myung was happy.
((And to make sure that the Tang Family doesn't think they can step on Chung Mun and pull his little brother away.))
"I'll have to recheck the sect's budget and my own savings to make sure we have enough for the wedding preparations..." Chung Mun mutters as he begins drafting a response to the Tang Family with what he thought were better marriage agreement conditions.
But then, a flash of dread causes Chung Mun to pause writing and leave a dark ink blot on the paper. He suspected, but he really wishes that he was wrongā€”!
"Huh?" Chung Myung gives Chung Mun a confused look. "We already got married though?"
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athousandbyeol Ā· 2 months ago
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tianwang and colours
teaser photos of this week's episodes were released and i couldn't stop staring at jiang tian and sheng wang's clothes.
@respectthepetty shared a brilliant post on the drama's colour theory, especially pertaining to the colours jiang tian and sheng wang are wearing or associated with. [thanks so much op for the insightful and beautifully written post ^^]
so, in this photo, jiang tian and sheng wang (maybe) are having a study date outside of school (and they look so domestic and cute and UGH). however, i do notice that jiang tian wears a darker shade of brown while sheng wang wears something lighter.
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directly quoting from op's post, "One is light, and the other is dark. One is the sun, and one is the moon. One is warm, and one is cool."
we're so used to seeing jiang tian in dark-coloured clothes (black, grey, blue) while sheng wang always wears something light/bright (orange, white, red, yellow). i think it's such a nice detail to be added in this drama and also jiang tian and sheng wang's characters, considering the progress of their relationship.
i guess, it's showing us how sheng wang has brought light into jiang tian's life, and now he's no longer drenched in only darkness. he still wears darker colours than sheng wang, but it doesn't have that usual gloominess. i think sheng wang balances jiang tian's darkness, and it's just so beautiful to witness this in the upcoming episodes.
[jiang tian's fit: darker brown t-shirt with light-coloured jeans and black high-cut converse; sheng wang's fit: light brown t-shirt with dark blue jeans and yellow converse and socks. they're balancing each other with colours/shades opposite of them.]
and don't get me started on the matching bracelets.....
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if my eyesight isn't deceiving me, jiang tian is blue and sheng wang is yellow/brown? again, op uses the motif 'the sun and the moon' to represent jiang tian and sheng wang and i think it's the most accurate representation of their personality.
even though the sun and the moon don't collide, they still belong to the same sky.
i honestly can't wait to see the shift in their relationship. since the walls between them are no longer high, will they finally be united? will there be more than just this feeling of wanting to be closer? what will happen in episode 7 that leads to them wearing these matching bracelets?
so many questions are left unanswered. we just have to wait and see.
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dreammeiser Ā· 8 months ago
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Boundaries!
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Hello, hi! Someone sent in an ask recommending that I put my Boundaries in posts across my social media, and you're very right, thank you for reminding me! I know it's not going to make people be nice/behave but they're things to be aware of. Thanks for reading and being mindful of them if you do. :o) It means a lot to me.
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therentyoupay Ā· 19 days ago
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hi kris!!!! as a longtime Jelsa shipper, have you noticed a shift in the random over the past 10+ years? esp as a writer? has the fandom lessened? is Jelsa still as popular?
HI NONNY, THANK YOU FOR YOUR QUESTION.
long story, short: yes and no! i could honestly write a whole essay on this. šŸ¤£ perhaps one day i will come back and reblog this and add some more definitive thoughts when i have the time šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’•
for now, i can say that (1) while there are definitely ebbs and flows to any fandom/any ship, and although ship wars/fandom!in-fighting/policing definitely fluctuate and change shape but typically persevere in one form or another... (2) at the end of the day, you can always find at least one peaceful, positive corner of the internet for pretty much any community šŸ’•āœØ
i don't have any concrete metrics or data re: jelsa fandom stats (e.g., "activity" in terms of the number of fics/fanart/posts/metas/commentaries/headcanons/theories/etc., "population" lol however defined) that we might try to use to operationally define how "active/big" a fandom might be at any given time, but based on nothing but pure personal, anecdotal experience: although activity fluctuates, inevitably, jelsa has been a pretty steady ship! off the top of my head, i can think of a few key "boosts" in which activity really ramped up... for example, we saw a boost in activity during the frozen ii release, unsurprisingly lol, and certainly, another boost now with @callimara's āœØunhingedāœØ video, resulting in our #kriscallicollab madness, more than you know, which has been SO AMAZING and inspiring and exciting and HEART-SQUEEZING to witness and to be a part of. šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ™šŸ™šŸ™šŸ’• overall, there's always new jelsa community activity each year! and remember, i also took a 3-ish-year on-again-off-again break from tumblr during the pandemic and the start of my ph.d. program and Life Activity, so i also missed out on a pretty active jelsa-tumblr time period too! like, nowadays, there are plenty of times i see a jelsa art or graphic on my dash made from 2019/2020/2021 that i've never seen before and it's like a special surprise treat šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ’•
it's also been very cool to see so many members of our OG community still enjoying life in the jelsa tag, or replying/commenting/liking posts and leaving comments on fics, or creating new art and fic, after so many years šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹ so many beautiful, lifelong friendships have been forged through this ship! likewise, there are so many newcomers or lurkers-turned-active-members and new community members that we've been able to meet in just the last few months alone, which is so exciting and really inspiring šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’• there's just a lot of respectā€”regardless of newness-or-OGness, generations (e.g., the Elder Millennials and Gen X-ers and Gen Z-ers)ā€”going in a lot of different directions, and that, luckily, is something that has stayed pretty consistent in the jelsa fandom for over a decade šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ„¹šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’•āœØāœØ
not sure how "popular" it is compare to other ships, though, i've never thought about it! šŸ˜‚ that bit doesn't matter šŸ’• just happy to still be here and enjoying our hobbies and creation and community, as ever šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’•šŸ’•
THANK YOU FOR YOUR QUESTION NONNY, HAVE AN AMAZING DAY āœØ
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turnipoddity Ā· 8 months ago
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when u get a post notification for turnip and then when u click it there's a mature community label u know it's gonna be good
you put too much trust in me
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gomzdrawfr Ā· 2 days ago
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ASKED THE WRONG PERSON BEFORE OOPS BUT.
Genuine question because I'm fascinated with phobias,
Does Raven struggle to eat fruit or vegetables sometimes because of her anthophobia? because they come from flowers and I was wondering what your perspective on her phobia is and itā€™s interesting from a psychological standpoint.
((I saw @s3rrrpentine tagged me on the original post too so))
The short answer is no to most of them, because while fruits and vegetables originates from flower, they lack the visual that would trigger her phobia.
Rambles below!
See the fear towards flowers stems from her experience of being in confinement in the face of sunflower wallpapers surrounding her, so sunflowers, in particular, creates a strong negative association for her. Over time because her fear went unaddressed, it generalized to all kinds of flowers, particularly bright yellow or vividly coloured ones. It's something like stimulus generalization where the brain begins to link fears towards similar stimuli.
The visual characteristics of flowers are the source of anxiety, followed by textures and smells. She is, sort of under some form of therapy (exposure, behaviour etc) to mitigate the stress associated with flowers. Last updated she was able to handle small shrubs and flower imagery (png etc).
The level of stress and discomfort from flowers depends on the context, if the floral scent is faint and overshadowed by other senses she can tolerate it. So fruits and vegetables are less likely to evoke reactions. Plus, given fruits and veges are usually combined with her everyday role in meals, there's a psychological separation from the concept of flowers.
Interestingly, this is why she is quite sensitive around tea! Some tea with strong floral scent might trigger her in one way or another. So she avoids tea like jasmine tea. Perfume as well! (the mask helps in blocking most scents)
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wildsaltair Ā· 23 days ago
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thoughts on commodus??
DESTROY HIM
So I am extremely prejudiced against Commodus and very much canā€™t give an unbiased opinion šŸ˜‚ because heā€™s the enemy of my beloved Maximus! Commodus is the epitome of an arrogant, selfish, sadistic psychopath who wrecks other peopleā€™s lives simply because they displease him. Heā€™s jealous of Maximus, so he:
murders his own father
tries to kill Max
has Maxā€™s innocent family slaughtered in the cruelest way (which wasnā€™t as a message to Max! he thought Max was dead! he just did it to be cruel!)
terrorizes / tries to assault his sister
uses his nephew as leverage
drives Rome into chaos and near-ruin with his blind selfishness
murders tons and tons of people
has no value for human life or decency
So yes. I despise his character šŸ˜¬
But on the other hand! Joaquin Phoenix played Commodus brilliantly and did an excellent job of giving him some measure of sympathy in a few scenes. The scene where Commodus chokes Marcus is really sad because you can see why Commodus is the way he is: because Marcus hasnā€™t been a good father and has alienated his son while pursuing other things. Itā€™s obvious through the film that Commodus just wants to be loved, which is why he does half of the awful things he does.
BUT that doesnā€™t excuse any of them. Even though I can see his troubled past and reasoning, heā€™s a grown man who chooses to destroy innocent lives and does horrible things to the man I love. So itā€™s a big no from me, dawg.
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friendlyforestbeast Ā· 30 days ago
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āœØšŸ‘€ hello I am here to inquire about Husk!!
Hello!!!! Thank you so much for the ask!!! šŸ„¹
Husk is the blorbo that chews on my brain and does not pay rent, I love them dearly XD
At the moment I'm fixating on some pre-campaign stuff (which I plan to make a comic for) based on the gang they were in during their teenage years :D
A consistent theme for Husk is their identity. After running away to the city, they weren't coping with the fact they were a changeling and had unknowingly deceived their human family for 12 years. They felt lost for a long while, shutting down and sleeping a lot to hide from their problems. They didn't even have a name for a few months until they were gifted one by a close friend. After breaking them out of their shell, the gang taught them many valuable life lessons, and it was the closest Husk ever got to being their true self prior to meeting Yikes. They were never on the side of the law, but they were a mostly honest fey with their heart on their sleeve but still had a deep love of mischief.
After being captured by the church, sent to the court wizard as a "science project" and subsequently recruited into Nonna's druid circle, they unlearned a lot of their healthier habits their friends taught them in favour of hiding their emotions under layers and layers of lies in order to handle their trauma and they sought power because deep down they're afraid of being made vulnerable again.
In campaign I'm so excited for Husk to reclaim their life and free themself from their homeland :D they'll never be a law abiding citizen but they've found people (the party) who want to know them without strings or bargains attached and they're finding their true self again :]
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stanpinesdykewife Ā· 1 month ago
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THE WAY YOU CHARACTERIZE STAN NGHGHHHH šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­šŸ˜­ i need to get him pregnant. THANK YOU AGAIN!!! your writing is so so soooo beautiful, both hcs and also your actual fics!! - šŸŽ€
HI HI thanks so much for requesting those hcs a while back they were the first collection of hcs i've ever made and i'm thinking in the future if i don't have prose in me i'll post more hcs instead! i really appreciate the idea and the kind words!!! šŸ«¶ and he's already pregnant. can you feel it kicking
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002yb Ā· 1 year ago
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Oh, I really like the idea of Dick being so ethereal that sometimes people get unease near him, magic heroes get goosebumps, magical artifacts shine, like he's just an forgotten ancient magic entity that came to the human's land
Omg yes, anon gets it!!! (ą¹‘ā€¢Ģ€ć…‚ā€¢Ģ)Łˆ Ģ‘Ģ‘
Let the above contrast with Jason, too. Where Jason makes people uneasy, as well, just in a different way. Because Jason is something that shouldn't be - a dead boy walking, a ghost come alive. People are unsettled by him; they see something damned and frightening when Jason is in the corner of their eye. He drives chills up their spines when he walks past and if he happens to touch them in any way - it steals their breath and takes it away because although Jason has been stolen away from them, he's been taken by Death. Jason still has one foot in that grave he crawled out of (the one deeper than he ever was tall, the one he dug his way out of, choking and keening).
Just Dick being seen as a blessing and Jason an omen.
Only, really? It's the other way around.
But I digress, Dick recognizing this and being drawn to Jason in spite of it. Or because of it. Because some part of them is kindred.
And oh, Jason resenting Dick because Dick is a beautiful sort of wonder while Jason is horror incarnate.
(āœæį‹• ā€æ į‹•)
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azu1as Ā· 3 months ago
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What do you think about tang bo vs tang gunak for cheongmyeong. With either tang bo time travelling/reincarnated to the future or tang gunak time travel to the past?
hello!! i am so so sorry this is super late šŸ„ŗ I've been rotating this ask in my head for two months because there's simply so many possibilities with this, I absolutely love love love it!
Ā»ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€“āœ„
To say that Tang Zhan's twin brother was a bit of a recluse would be an understatement.
Despite being named after one of the most renowned members of the Tang Family, Tang Gunak's son took after the known worst traits of their great ancestor.
Tang Bo was as cold and uncaring as the earlier recounts of his namesake. But unlike their ancestor, his son wasn't interested in improving his martial arts. Rather, he seemed to content himself with staying indoors and building that strange shrine of his that appeared to be dedicated to the Plum Blossom Sword Saint.
Tang Gunak sighs tiredly. He could never get a straight answer from his son whenever he asked about his odd obsession with Mount Hua's hero. Through the years, he's learned to brush it off as another eccentricity of his son.
The one time he ordered Tang Pae and Tang Zhan to remove their brother's shrine, they both ended up needing immediate medical assistance because of how viciously Tang Bo had attacked them for 'desecrating' his altar.
He thinks it's such a shame that Tang Bo refuses to partake in his siblings' training, but despite his adamant refusal, his son's core is still one of the strongest among his siblings.
And one of the purest too, it suddenly comes to Tang Gunak's mind as he watches Chung Myung cheerfully chug down another bottle of alcohol.
It feels almost wrong how easy it was to compare Chung Myung's core with his son's despite them being on vastly different spectrums while having equally well-known namesakes from their respective family and sect.
On one end in the dark, there was Tang Bo who quietly cultivated his core as he whispered quiet mutterings to his altar and refused interactions with people unnecessarily. And on the other was Chung Myung, who was at the forefront of Mount Hua's rise.
It was admirable, truly.
Tang Gunak would say so as much if it weren't for the sudden killing intent he could feel directed at him.
Standing outside right in front of the window with no subtlety whatsoever was his son, Tang Bo. His face was pressed against the window panes and Tang Gunak only realized then how threatening of an aura his son could produce.
Chung Myung wiped the drips of alcohol away from his lips and cast Tang Bo an amused look, "Aren't you going to finally let him in?"
Tang Gunak would have if he didn't know that his son would begin to antagonize him the moment he's let into the room by monopolizing Chung Myung's attention and looking smug about it. It happened during their first meeting in the dining hall so Tang Gunak wouldn't be surprised if it happened all over again.
He would lean overly into Chung Myung's space and call him 'hyung' with an exaggerated tone despite being the older of the two. And much to everyone else's bafflement and discomfort, Chung Myung wordlessly let him.
While Tang Gunak was glad that his son finally deemed it alright to leave the confines of his room, he isn't sure if the change in obsession from the Plum Blossom Sword Saint to Mont Hua's Divine Dragon was a fair exchange.
Tang Gunak watches as Chung Myung makes his way to the window and leans against Tang Bo from the other side.
Tang Bo's face noticeably softens as his gaze shifts toward the younger man and it twists a strange part of Tang Gunak's stomach to watch the same thing happen to Chung Myung's face.
Said man taps against the glass pane, "Stop being so intense. You're freaking your dad out."
His son grumbles while tossing him another stink-eyeā€”Tang Gunak has gotten his fair share of those this past week ever since these two struck up a sudden close friendship. His gaze turns petulant as he returns his attention to Chung Myung.
"What is it about me making friends that you hate so much," Chung Myung rolls his eyes in exasperation.
"My father doesn't want you to be 'just friends'."
Tang Gunak would be more offended by the vitriol in the way Tang Bo called him his father if he weren't distracted by the weird tone his son spoke the last phrase.
Tang Bo takes a look at the mutual confusion on Chung Myung and Tang Gunak's faces and isn't sure if he's thankful or annoyed that he's surrounded by painfully emotionally oblivious people.
Less competition but, at the same time, it's sometimes too embarrassing to watch the way Tang Gunak unconsciously acted around Chung Myung in private.
Tang Bo narrows his eyes. It's been more than a lifetime, surely his feelings will reach Chung Myung faster than his father's does. Right??
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fadelbison Ā· 1 month ago
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I want to preface this by saying that english is not my first language, and most of what I've learned has been on twitter, so if I sound condescending, I'm sorry lol. I swear that's not the tone of this message. Also, I'm sorry if I'm rambling.
That said, I like reading your takes because we have very different interpretations. It's so interesting to me lol. I'll give you one example, like when you said First is in his fan service era of trying to be masc and cool but he's always been like that?? He's very aware that he's not the "manliest," so when he says he wants to be cool and etc. he's joking. Idk if it's the language barrier but he's actually VERY funny, he's always joking around, and he knows he's cute and feels comfortable being cute, but at this point, it's like an inside joke that he "refuses" his cuteness (but like he doesn't and in fact he constantly plays it up lol). But he's also mentioned how he feels like he has grown up and how his personality has naturally become more serious and private, so maybe what you guys are interpreting as changing his persona for fanservice is just him getting older. Idk, I feel like things are simpler than you think.
That's just one example, but still I like reading your posts so please keep the conversation going hehe <3
I think rather than condescension when I get this type of ask I'm a little confused what people think I said hahahaha and how far our collective memories go back aka when I said First has changed which two points are you comparing versus which two points was I talking about ^^ Unless specified I'm always comparing Eclipse era First with post Only Friends. and this particular ask which I suspect was what spurred this was comparing pre-FK First with First now and the rest of the ask was focused on Khaotung. I think one of the first things I said about First is that he's effortlessly cool. Even though I did not mention it, it was for exactly the things that you said. I didn't watch a lot of Toew Laew but I am also super into BrightFirst. First is just a natural mood maker and class clown and even though he does have so much anxiety he's actually extremely good at it. Another point which maybe wasn't clear is that in their very recent interactions First is not making these comments (which is normal for him to make the comments so he's actually sticking to the script more) but it's actually Khaotung (it isn't normal for him because he generally likes sticking to the script) <- this is the change I was talking about. Unfortunately, I for one have never bought that he's actually an introvert. He's always called himself an extrovert and it wasn't until he started living in Khaotung's very gentle pocket as his branded partner that he's saying he's an introvert. He's 26 yo, constantly under scrutiny, constantly only specifically getting criticized for crying during their fanmeets. I see a type of pressure on First that just doesn't exist for Khaotung. I'm not sure First knows what he is lmao. But actually, since I'm not as obsessed about First as Khaotung I hesitate to say too much more about him? I don't...notice him with the same razor sharp focus that my attention stays on Khaotung dkfjsdfjhfhks And for the last part 'I feel like things are simpler than you think.' is just wrong hahaha. Fanservice both politically and economically has always been extremely complicated. In a place like Thailand where there is a formalized business around branded pairing (please remember I follow MANY branded pairs not just FK)... oh boy if you think it's simple I will bet you anything that A LOT of effort has gone into making you think so.
The core dilemma of any fanservice is that it's a performance whose main goal is to make it feel as natural and spontaneous as possible in the context of real life. Kudos to Firstkhao for their smashing success haha
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