#thank you anon i am eternally grateful for your understanding

[mousy-nona]

Hey this is the anon that had requested the mpreg story with Lucifer havin a drunken night with Alastor that lead to him having a child with Alastor that he didn't know about until Alastor brought the young boy to the hotel. I just want to say that the first part is really good as I see it as a prompt plot backstory that leads into the prompt itself

PART TWOOO 

Less porn, but still some porn, then mostly plot.

You have been warned.

Later that night

Alastor sneered and tried to buck him off again, but this time Lucifer was prepared. His angelic grace kept the bastard pinned into place as Lucifer lowered himself to Alastor’s weeping cock. 

“Now, that’s not very fair,” he scolded. Alastor stared daggers at him, but he couldn’t quite hide the hitch in his breath as Lucifer’s hot breath washed over his sensitive skin. “You had your turn. It’s my turn now.” 

“Fuck. You.” 

A tentative lick was all it took to send Alastor’s head careening back, every muscle in his body clenched as Lucifer sucked on the head of his cock with reckless abandon. The sounds that were coming out of his garbled throat – his heaving chest slick with sweat and desire – his clenched teeth, Lord, his eyes, hazy and drugged with pleasure as he watched Lucifer bob on his dick…

It was almost too much. One wrong move, and Lucifer thought he might cum again. Patience. He forced himself to go slower, to enjoy every waking second of this already half-forgotten dream. 

Alastor groaned. “Coming,” he managed, his voice hoarse as his hips shot up. 

“No you’re not.” 

“Wha–”

Lucifer squeezed the base of his shaft with his fist, stopping the seed from surfacing. His cock strained, swollen and red with pressure as Alastor cried out, his large body twisting wildly under Lucifer’s golden grip. His back arched, his heels dug in hard, his shadows whipping and snarling as he strained to get free, to release. 

Lucifer had never seen anything more erotic in his long, long life. 

“Lucifer!” Alastor, that cold, cruel, merciless soul, sounded close to begging. The radio static had nearly faded from his voice. With a shiver, Lucifer realized that, for the first time, he was hearing Alastor. The real Alastor. 

“Not yet,” Lucifer groaned, wondering if it was possible to come without touching himself at all. He licked his finger and pressed it between Alastor’s legs, the tight hole clenching and gripping his finger as he continued working Alastor’s dick. 

There was a low moan, but otherwise Alastor didn’t put up any more of a fight. His large frame was trembling, his whole self shaking with the need for release. His eyes were glassy, twin rubies shining through the dark as he watched Lucifer with overwhelming need. 

“Lâche-moi,” he whispered.

Let me go.

“Soon,” he whispered. 

He pushed another finger in, and then another. Alastor let his head fall back, his chest heaving, the sizzle of static and sex heavy in the air. Finally, Lucifer withdrew his hand and pressed himself against Alastor’s loosened hole. 

He leaned forward and captured Alastor’s mouth with his own. The wild animal he was, Alastor slashed at his lips with his teeth, gold blood and spit and pre-cum mixing in an unholy trinity as their tongues fought against each other, sloppily, angrily, violently. It was no more a kiss than it was a battle for dominance. There was nothing tender to it. Nothing sweet or loving. 

So that was how he wanted to play this? 

Lucifer snapped his hips forward, nearly losing himself immediately as his cock was swallowed by the tight ring of muscle. Alastor howled, feeling himself filled, claimed. His eyes flashed, but the anger was quickly replaced by ecstasy as Lucifer found the spot, found it over and over again. Both of them were spiraling quickly, their bodies still oversensitized from the last round. Alastor growled, his long limbs twisting and flexing, his eyes widening as cries burst from him, his hips rolling forward to guide Lucifer’s cock deeper, harder. 

The waves of pleasure washed over Lucifer, coming faster and faster as he lost himself in the rhythm of their bodies. He moved his hand down and grasped Alastor’s head in his palm. Alastor choked, his hips lifting, his back arching.

“Come.”

It was the magic word they’d both needed. Alastor clenched around him, a crazed shout ripping from his beautiful throat as Alastor’s unbelievable tightness milked every last drop from him. In that moment, the Heavens could have broken, and Lucifer wouldn’t have noticed. There was Alastor, and only Alastor. 

A whispered “Lucifer,” was the last thing he heard as the darkness claimed him.  -------------------------------

Lucifer woke up the next morning to a throbbing head, an aching ass, and an empty bed, in that order. Alastor was long gone – or maybe he hadn’t been there at all? Could it have been a dream? 

He rolled over in his sheets – and promptly smacked himself in the face with the remnants of his torn clothes. Ow. Okay, not a dream, then. 

Which only left one question: How the Hell was he going to face Alastor? 

But he needn’t have worried. When he made his way down to the kitchen, the table was set for six, not seven, and Husk was the one leaning over a merrily crackling pan, not Alastor. Lucifer had never seen the ex-Overlord in such high spirits. The cat was humming, for Chrissakes. 

“What are you so happy about?” 

“The annoying-ass deer moved outta here last night,” he crowed. “Back to whatever hellhole he crawled out of. Maybe he’ll actually stay there this time!” 

Husk was too busy whistling away to notice Lucifer disappear.

Alastor’s room. His radio station. The lobby. Every dark and shadowy corner. Even Rosie’s shop. Cannibal Colony. Lucifer searched, and searched, and found nothing.

The demon was gone, as surely as if he’d never existed in the first place.  -------------------------------

Days passed, then weeks, then months, and still no sign of Alastor. The others moved on, some faster than others (Husk, who’d damn near thrown a party the first night he’d left), some later (Charlie, who cried for days when she thought no one was looking), but one by one the mentions of Alastor disappeared. Time ticked forward. The world marched on.

Lucifer, though, never stopped looking. Never stopped staring at shadows, never stopped seeing antlers out of the corner of his eye. 

And then, on the fourth anniversary of his disappearance, there was a knock on the door. 

Because life loves symmetry, it was Charlie who answered. The rest of them crowded around the lobby behind her, each one mentally ticking off the names that mattered and realizing none of them was missing. So who was at the door? 

“Welcome to–” Charlie stopped in the middle of her well-practised speech. She went as still as a statue for one breathless second. Then she screamed and jumped onto the tall, lean figure silhouetted in the doorway.

Lucifer’s mouth went dry. No. No, it couldn’t be. 

“Alastor!” Then she gasped, her gaze shifting to a smaller shape standing by Alastor’s side. “And who is this?” 

“This little one is Dio.” The radio static was so familiar and so heart-breaking at the same time, Lucifer felt he’d been shot through the chest with it. “He and I were staying at Rosie’s –”

“Aunt Rosie’s,” a higher voice piped up.

“Yes, Aunt Rosie’s,” Alastor obligingly amended. “We were staying at hers until things had…calmed down, somewhat.” 

“And do you really think you can come barging back in here as if nothing’s happened?” Lucifer barged forward, pushing Charlie to the side. “It’s been four fucking years –” 

His voice trailed off when he came face to face – with himself. Well, almost himself. The boy had his pale skin, his marionette cheeks, but he had Alastor’s antlers, Alastor’s fire hair and Alastor’s bright red, cunning gleam.

Slowly, disbelievingly, he met Alastor’s narrowed eyes. “Who did you say this was?” 

Alastor ignored him, because he was a dirty, annoying, bastard. Instead, he crouched down so he was eye-level with the boy, his face softer than Lucifer had ever seen it. 

“Dio, say hello to your other father.”

“Hello,” the boy – Dio – said. 

That was when Lucifer keeled over in a dead faint. 

When he woke up, the lobby was empty. Well, nearly empty. Alastor was sitting next to him, and the boy was practicing throwing darts at a lumpy doll. There were at least eight darts skewering the doll in the heart, and three more stabbing it in the brain. 

“What did I say? Think about where you want the dart to land, then throw it.” Alastor was saying, sounding like his usual, terse self. Good to see that some things never changed, child or no child.

There was a child. And from the looks of it, it was most definitely his child. 

He groaned and rubbed desperately at his eyes. They both looked at him at the same time. 

“Welcome back, drama queen.” That was Alastor and his sharp tongue. 

“Where is everyone?”

“I told them to take a walk. There’s a couple of things we need to catch up on, and I thought it might be better if we did it without an audience.” 

“A couple of things?” Anger surged through him, hotter than the fires of Hell. His six wings flared wide, and when he stood, a red tail lashed around his legs. Alastor immediately stepped in front of Dio, his shadow tendrils creating a protective shield around the boy.

But it was Dio and his suddenly too-white face that made Lucifer take a step back. He sighed and forced himself to calm down, extinguishing the fire blazing around his head. “You left. You did…that –” he spluttered, feeling his face turn red at Dio’s curious gaze. “With me, and then you left without a word. And now you turn up here – with our child? How did you think I was going to react?” 

“Frankly, I had no idea.” Alastor’s face was carefully blank, smoothed out of any emotion. “That’s exactly why I had to leave. You dote on Charlie, but she was the product of your marriage. How you would have reacted to a son with an enemy was anybody’s guess. I couldn’t take that risk.” 

“Did you really think I wouldn’t have helped you?” Lucifer bit out. “Do you really have such a low opinion of me?”

“Listen to yourself,” Alastor’s voice snapped and snarled, the static thick in his words. “You hated me. That was fine. The feeling was quite mutual, I can assure you. But this child – I did not want him growing up in that environment. Rosie’s was a much safer bet.”

“Safer,” Lucifer scoffed. “He would have been safer with me. I am the king of Hell. I am the first and original Sin. Who would have dared hurt him under my roof?” 

His son. Lucifer’s mouth turned bitter as he thought of everything he had missed, everything Alastor had stolen from him – those first blissful moments of birth, his first cries, his first steps, his first words. All those years he would never be able to experience. “How could you do this to me?” He asked, his voice half-broken.

“Dio, to the kitchen.” Alastor ordered.

“But–” 

“Now.”

Grumbling, the boy marched away, reminding Lucifer of the way Charlie used to stomp off whenever it was time for bed.

Char-char! It’s getting way too late! 

Da-aad! 

She’d bat those adorable, huge eyes of hers and trick him into staying up just five more minutes, Dad, please! I’ll be super, super good! 

He softened, the deep, protective part of himself stirring for the second time in his life. There was no mistaking it. This was his son. 

And he didn’t know him, but he would die for him. 

Alastor watched him carefully, the stiff set of his shoulders relaxing just a touch when he saw the rage ebbing from Lucifer’s face.

“I’m…sorry,” Alastor said. 

Lucifer gaped. Alastor…apologizing? That was the second most surprising thing he had ever done – the first being giving birth to Lucifer’s kid, of course. 

“You – what? Sorry?” He repeated dumbly. 

“Yes,” Alastor repeated stiffly, as if it was causing him great pain to acknowledge it. “I didn’t want to keep him from you, but I didn’t see any other way. I didn’t know how you would react, and I believed it was safest to wait until he was old enough to defend himself. He means…” 

Alastor trailed off, and Lucifer placed his hand over his and squeezed. “I understand,” he sighed, because he did. Being a parent made you crazy. It made you scared. People did stupid things when they were scared.

The two of them sat in silence for a moment. It wasn’t forgiveness – the hurt ran too deep for that – but it felt like the start of something else. Something new. 

Finally, Alastor stirred. He pulled something out of his coat and placed it in Lucifer’s palm. “His favorite toy.” 

It was a toy duck. 

And suddenly, Lucifer knew everything was going to be just fine.

[blocksruinedme]

(hi there! sorry if this is disrespectful or anything, feel free to delete this ask! i was just concerned because in the comments of jimmy's recent videos, it seems that he might make a video reacting to fanfictions...

very concerning! especially because it seems like he didn't contact the creators of the edits in newest video beforehand. no offense to him, but i genuinely do not trust him to handle fanfiction in a respectful way. he's very hard-working, but he's getting dangerously content-brained!

anyways, the reason i'm sending this ask to you is because you seem to frequent his streams a lot. VERY sorry if this is disrespectful to ask, but if you do attend his next stream, is it ok to ask that you try and send a message in his chat? i would myself, but he streams after midnight where i live T^T i really hope that someone well-versed in the rules of fandom spaces (maybe scott (ｰ ｰ;) ) can talk him out of it, but i would be very grateful if any chatters could discourage him during his next live.

thank you very much for reading!!)

-a shy chinese anon who experienced the banning of ao3 in china because fans of a celebrity mass-reported an rpf fic to the government :<

(Hey shy anon, I didn't show up until a little after the ban, but I was on the english side of that fandom so i know a lot. my eternal condolences, I'll never stop being upset about what happened!)

It is not at all disrespectful to ask politely, which you have! I am not going to send a message in his chat because it is an absolute hellhole, but people I know have left thoughtful comments on his youtube, which I think is 20x more useful. He sees those in his own time and can think about it. Chat is running nonstop, super fast, you get instant reaction in the chat from all kinds of sorts - seriously i love jimmy and i have nothing against younger people, but holy hell that chat is mostly intolerable to read. Most streams I don't even have it visible. Jimmy has very little time to think in response to chat messages, it can't be nuanced, and the first thing he says is now public record.

Overall, I don't think Jimmy will react to fanfic. If he does (and I've been wrong predicting Jimmy before!), it's going to be something like Wholesome Seablings Adventures. I can not imagine Jimmy reading ship fic - unless I guess it's incredibly pg canon-ship? There's all kinds of "pg youtubers", and Jimmy's more on the Katherine side of thing, appealing to families and genuinely little kids. If you look at the saucy things he lets in, you generally need some real non-pg context for it to feel non-pg. (there's always exceptions)

When people demand he address shipping he tries to say as little as possible. He's been shown nsfw fanart while he was streaming. He knows what is going on and he's not going to touch that. He's thoughtful when it counts, and since these aren't stream reacts, he has time to think hard about what he's actually going to use. So if he did do fanfic, there would be plenty of never seen footage of Jimmy of going "holy moly!" and moving on. When it matters, he is generally thoughtful and respectful.

Like the time he realized he was confused about asexuality (he didn't know about aromanticism) and slowed down to be really careful he didn't say anything accidentally hurtful. (for context shelby is ace but dates and he knows that. look at his poor little face trying to understand.)

Maybe he'll mess up this time, I sure hope not, but I'm not personally freaking out.

Also, exactly one time he opened tumblr on stream, it was the sexyman poll, and he read my reply to the post (i'm the one who called him a wet paper bag of a man, my claim to fame.) I showed up to apologize, he was a sweetheart, and he said this about tumblr, that he knows we want our own private space. He's respectful at heart.

I am not on tiktok, but until your ask, I'll admit it never occurred to me he might contact the creators before reacting. Thinking on it, I guess I think of TikTok like youtube, where it is loudly tossed out at the whole world for attention, but I'm not on TikTok.

And why do I think ao3 is different? Well, I have no coherent answer besides "vibes" and "more contained audience" and "everyone knows everyone is on youtube and tiktok".

Here are some more Jimmy clips I've wanted to share on tumblr for one reason or another.

In the end, I have been hyperfixating on this man for sixteen months and I believe it'll be okay. If I'm wrong, well. We'll make it through this, gang. We'll take care of each other and keep going. Nothing's stopped us yet!

If you want to say something to Jimmy, leave a yt comment, don't go into his stream, please, not there, you'll just provoke people and he might have to respond to that, please

Everyone out there who read ao3 not logged in - go log in, people are locking things.

People on ao3, lock or don't lock, as you see fit!

(also joel lizzie and oli did fanfic readings/reenactments/whatever years ago, including writing their own snippets, i got through like 90 seconds of one, youtube at your own risk.)

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

Hey, Nyarla. I've been following you for a while and although this is a safe space and you seem extremely open minded and kind, I don't feel brave enough to say this off-anon due to past experiences.

You're one of the first authors who, without writing for it directly, has made me comfortable reading your headcanon sets and your fics and blurs, because they way you represent characters is comforting.

I am autistic, and it is extremely hard to have people not treat you like you're either mentally impaired (due to misinformation) or plain creepy (due to ableism), and it is disheartening to just exist sometimes. Often times, this kind of treatment gets applied from authors into their work. I don't think everyone has to know everything about every single condition in the world, but it seems there's a tendency to, most of the time, infantilize or demonize, or apply the aforementioned treatment, to neurodivergent people.

But to my very pleasant surprise, you had this set of headcanons for Mihawk, titled "Mood Swings", where you wrote the reader with some bipolar tendencies, and I couldn't help but bawl. I genuinely cried for a good while, in both relief and happiness. You didn't demonize bipolar tendencies, nor make him annoyed, nor anything of the sort. You were SO respectful about it, and so fucking mature in your writing, and it felt like a warm hug and a reassuring pat on the back.

You haven't even written anything for an autistic reader themselves, and you still helped me immensely with one single fic. Thank you so much for the way you write, and for the way you interact with your followers. You're wonderful, and I am eternally grateful to you for just one single set of headcanons like that. You reaffirmed the comfort within my comfort character. I hope you yourself find joy in the fact you, unknowingly, made a person so irremediably happy.

I can't thank you enough ❤️

I understand completely the desire to remain anonymous, but please know I still have the utmost respect for you for sending me this, and I really just wanna give you the biggest hug in the world, and I legitimately have tears in my eyes right now.

I'm going to come out and say right now, I'm schizophrenic. My official diagnoses is schizoaffective disorder depressive type, which essentially means that I experience symptoms of psychosis associated with schizophrenia (mostly auditory hallucinations in my case, occasionally visual, tends to worsen with lack of sleep) in tandem with symptoms characteristic of depression. I don't tend to tell people about it, because I know how schizophrenia is depicted in fiction and media in general. Typically as psychos that do bad things "because the voices said to."

I'm saying this because I want you to know that I understand how people tend to attach stigma to mental health conditions and neurodivergence, and I know how much it sucks and how much it hurts; and also that I respect you so, so much for talking about it. It's kind of skewed whether schizophrenia is considered neurodivergeant or not, but I tend toward identifying as neurodivergent. Experiencing the world differently, processing information differently, thinking differently is the general definition of ND, and I definitely identify with that.

I haven't specifically written autistic characters/readers largely because I don't feel like I would be able to accurately represent it, and I do not want to write it in a way that would make anyone uncomfortable or upset. I helped raise two of my nephews that were autistic, and they were both so different, in personality and quirks and "symptoms." They're also amazing and vibrant and intellient in ways that I can't even begin to describe.

Two of my favorite fictional characters that are generally accepted as being autistic are L and Near from Death Note. It's never explicitly stated in the manga or anime that they're autistic, but they're both written and depicted in a way that shows how they think and experience things differently without demeaning them for it; that other characters are a little nervous or intimidated around them at first, but grow to understand and form bonds with them over the course of the story; and they're also shown to be distinctly different from each other in personality, rather than carbon copies of each other. As such, if you haven't read/watched Death Note, I highly recommend it. Manga more than anime for personal reasons (there were some differences made in the ending of the anime that I don't agree with but I'm not going to get into that here)

ANYWAY

I'm also really beyond happy that you enjoyed Mood Swings. I wrote it with exactly the intention of representing Bi-Polar symptoms realistically and without any stigma. Knowing that you found it comforting makes me so, so happy. That was exactly what I wanted. I've seen "bi-polar" used synonymously with "psycho" so often, usually in tandem with a particular word rhyming with "witch," and I hate it so much.

Mental health isn't a joke. Some people are born with their brains wired differently. Some people are forced to live through trauma that rewires their brain. It makes day-to-day life exhausting beyond measure, particularly if it involves interacting with other people, and it's even more exhausting when others poke fun at it and don't take it seriously.

I know I'm repeating myself, but I really, sincerely want this blog to be a safe place for everyone. So it makes me so, so happy to recieve Asks like yours. So thank you again, and I hope you (and anyone else who needs it) continue to find this to be a safe place.

[stedesbonnets]

hi lets show some love for our mutuals. tag your favorite mutuals and tell them why you love them

thank you anon! this is so much fun. you've created such a nice, loving atmosphere in the fandom today! <3

obviously i'm gonna start with @theosrose my beloved. i am eternally grateful for their friendship. they are the nicest, sweetest, kindest and funniest person i have ever met. they just get me so much and i can be myself when i'm around them, i don't have to worry about anything. i can't thank them enough for always reading my fics and supporting me in so many other ways, and i can only hope the feeling is mutual. if there is one thing this site has given me that i'n grateful for, it's them

(meme fully intended) i have only known @aroacefrenchie for like, 2 months, but if anything happened to her--well, i wouldn't kill anyone, but the bottom line is that jums has become one of my favorite people on this site. so kind and soo funny, i love our conversations, i could talk with her for hours and never get bored. i'm really grateful for our friendship and i'm so glad being stem students brought us together <33

@xoxoemynn marianne is the kindest and sweetest soul i've ever encountered. seeing her on the dash just makes me smile. incredible writer, and i trust her opinion dearly. love you bestie!!

@blakbonnet i think everyone will agree that meow is one of the coolest people in the fandom, but very accepting and very friendly. i remember not having lots of friends in the fandom, and being welcomed by her was so very kind, i still don't take it for granted. i love our conversations, discussions, theory sharing, skincare talk, just everything.

@wecanbepirates this list cannot be complete without sarah!! her kindness always brings a smile to my face. she is so uplifting, with such welcoming and joyful aura. i always get so happy when i see her on the dash 💖💖💖

@asneakyfox has the absolute best metas, they just take anything i lowkey pick on and write it all down in such a beautiful, accurate way. like i am always standing up clapping whenever i read one of their posts, just WOW

@jellybeanium124 nina my jewutual!! always, always makes me laugh. it is honestly so nice to have another jew in the fandom, it really makes me feel not alone. like, i know there is someone who will understand me. i'm really happy to know you 💖💖💖

love you all!!!

[skyward-floored]

Anon about the IAU Four fic.

OH MY GOSH!!! I AM SO SORRY!!! I feel so embarrassed rn. I guess because this AU feels very niche I didn't even think to check for other people writing it 😓. I found it because of you and just went blind to other people playing in the sandbox. Thank you so much for the fic link, and I will try and remember to check for other authors next time! Have a good night!

Hey don’t worry about it!!! It’s completely understandable you’d be confused. I’ve written the majority of fics for this au since I am the creator lol, but a few other people have written some things for me (that I am eternally grateful for, you all are lovely)!

You’re right that it is pretty niche... or at least it feels that way to me. It’s definitely a random kind of thing lol. But to anyone who’s come along for the ride, thank you! Your support is what’s helped make this au what it is today.

[drabblesandsnippets]

Ok, I'm taking courage from the last anon. I personally don't read character x reader fic (I blocked those tags), and I just scroll past the hidden posts without ever thinking twice. I don't know what got me to click on your story, but I am eternally grateful that I did. I am big, and the amount of issues I have with my body are never-ending. I also happen to be in my late 30s and a virgin. I have never in my life felt comfortable or confident enough to be intimate with someone. Reading your story made me feel like I could be. Like maybe I will find someone I feel safe and comfortable with to explore that kind of intimacy. No story has ever made me feel that way, and I'm really glad that I leaned into the impulse to click on your story.

Oh gosh, this is going to make me cry.

Thank you so much for having the courage to send this! I'm so glad you found my story and that it resonated with you.

I completely understand about not being comfortable or confident enough to be intimate - it took me a long time too! I've always been bigger and felt like I missed out on a lot when it came to relationships and intimacy.

Even after I found someone who was kind and patient and did nothing but make me feel desired, it still took time for me to get to where I am today.

I hope you find someone you feel safe with. I promise there are people out there - it's scary and it can take some time to find them, but it's so worth it, and you deserve to experience it!

Sending you love 🩶

[emometalhead]

Tag some of your favorite mutuals to let them know you love them and it's going to be okay! 💖💖💖

Hi anon! This is so cute! Thanks for the opportunity to spread some love.

I'm going to copy what Andi did and write some paragraphs under the cut. 🩷

@morska--vila Andi, I'm starting with you because this was inspired by you!! I love you so much!! You understand parts of me that I can't put into words for other people. You have the best sense of humor, and you brighten every situation. You are resilient, caring, and so lovely. You're also a petty queen, and that's a high compliment. I am forever grateful to know you and to have your friendship. I know I can come to you with any problem and leave the conversation feeling lighter and more equipped to deal with it. Endless love and hugs to you 🩷🩷.

@duffmckagans First of all, I hope you're enjoying your vacation!!!!! Some beach time is always nice, and though I love having you here I'm also happy when you're doing something cool irl! Kelsey, I feel like I've known you for a lifetime. We are so similar, and I love how well you understand my brain. No one else can decipher my ramblings and random lyrics like you lol. You are so insanely smart and talented, and I am so glad you share parts of your life and work with me!! I'm in awe of you always. Love you!! Sending virtual hugs and one day real ones!!!!

@day-trippin-dreamer TINA. Hi. I'm going to act like I haven't already texted you today (and every day). You are like my biggest supporter, and I can't say thank you enough times!! You're the best pop culture, TV, and movie buddy!!!! You have great taste, and I love our little judgments and opinions we share. Also I'm happy you're finally getting into Imagine Dragons lol. You are so fashionable, fun, and I love how we can talk for hours about everything and nothing. Our chats mean so much to me.

@no-fxn-club Frankie!!!! I have to start by saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! You will get an actual birthday message too in about 30 minutes, but I had to say it here. I love you so much my dude. I am eternally grateful for your friendship. You have a great music taste. I love that we can make fun of ourselves and each other together. You are so fun to talk to, and I've literally never wanted to hug someone more! Also you just have such a cool style, and I'm so impressed with you in general!!

@inquisitiveheretic Lee!! I truly admire you as a person. I love how you compose yourself. You are articulate. You are such a talented writer. I'm in awe of you. I love our conversations, and I love every glimpse you give me into yourself. You help me feel confident and free, and I'll never be able to thank you enough for that. You have such good taste, and you're probably the only person from whom I've ever actually listened to every song/artist recommendation I've been given. I'm not sure what praise is higher than that.

@rebelrollerqueen Ren, you are such a force. I'm so impressed by all you've accomplished. You are crazy smart. You're multi-talented. (Seriously your makeup is to die for, but also you are musical, fashionable, and intelligent. Amazing!!) You seem so confident in yourself, and I love that for you. Not to go full mom, but damn my internet kid is cool. I am so proud of you, and I am sending such a big virtual hug your way. I love having you in my life, and I love being here to support you.

[adenei]

I just wanted to say congratulations and I know that you will be amazing. I hope you make the most memories and give the most snuggles to the little one. As always, you are one of my favorite writers, is that I have ever came across. I am so happy to be able to say I read your work because I don’t know how I would even go through life without reading it. And your stories has really helped me realize that there is light at the end of the tunnel and I am eternally grateful for that. I hope you take care.

Sending you lots of love, and I hope you’re always surrounded by love specially, now take care of my friend 🥺🥺❤️❤️

Thank you, anon! You're the sweetest! Sorry for the delayed response, though I'm sure you understand..time moves much differently now lol

[thatswhatsushesaid]

rote anon again! i just wanted to talk a bit about the books so far ❤️

right now my favorite characters are verity, kettricken, burrich, and patience (which as a lxc, wq, jc, and jyl fan... can't say i could really expect anything different haha)!

i love verity and kettricken, they're amazing individually but together they just... shine. the kind and wise king (in waiting, technically, but he's the true king in mine and fitz's hearts) and the fierce and noble queen (again... she's the true queen and girlboss)!! they're so beautiful together, i was so happy when they finally talked and worked things out between them 🥲 my blorbos are in love your honor!!!

burrich the tragic bisexual icon. my god. i wish he could just be happy but i fear he's doomed to pine hopelessly for the rest of his life. it's just the kind of person he is... my boy. i want to wrap him in blankets and feed him a cinnamon roll and a black coffee. old man (late middle age, but you know what i mean) blorbos can be so compelling actually

lady patience!!! i was really scared when she first showed up because it's a classic trope, the wife of the bastard's father being resentful and awful towards the kid (madam jin anyone?) but she was so lovely and kind. she truly cared for fitz, she was 100 percent on his side and so supportive and sweet to him. i love how autistic she is about her plants it's really charming! she reminds me of my favorite aunt and i am so fond of her. i want to write fic about her and chivalry falling in love. augh

molly!! molly molly molly... an incredible example of womanly virtue. and i don't mean that in a weird "divine feminine" or tradwife way or anything, it's just... she's a real one, you know? she's fierce and strong and independent and proud and also tender and loving and loyal and responsible and patient and so so amazing. fitz really fucked up when he fumbled her imo. she deserves the best and i hope she gets it!! <3

all the characters, male and female, are incredibly written, as are the relationships between them. robin hobb obviously put tons of care and thought and passion into the characters and the world and how everyone and everything interacts. i can't wait to read the rest of her books!

i never expected to get so invested in a random (and a little bit niche as i understand it?) series that started almost 30 years ago, but i'm really glad i did!! thank you so so so much for putting it on my radar, i'm eternally grateful. i feel like i owe you a life debt or something. i'm going to recommend this to everyone i know and everyone i don't. i'm going to shout it to the world. this series has changed me irrevocably and i'm only two and a bit books in. thank you.

anon, you are REALLY going through it, this is THE quintessential realm of the elderlings experience!!! also re: lady patience oooooh just you wait, if you think you love her now, you're going to love her even more as the story progresses. also i have many, many additional (and complimentary!!) thoughts about molly and how the very best thing she ever did for herself was Move On From Fitz, which is why [redacted spiel about the last trilogy, i will withhold all my thoughts on this subject for now]

please do keep me posted on your read of the series, i'm very keen to hear more!

[jibble]

hello <333 i just binged all of Mercy-Freeform and i am obsessed to the maximum so thank you so much for your service because you have my eternal gratitude!!!

firstly i just want to say that the original fic you took the concept from was one i read but ultimately stopped reading because i just didn’t feel comfortable reading the dynamics between soundwave and jazz in that fic, so reading a fic with an older and more mature soundwave and a jazz whos (far) kinder was definitely something that was heaven sent for me!!! so thank you so much for that

and theres so many little things in the fic i enjoyed thoroughly that i don’t know how to list them all in a cohesive manner but i will try <3

firstly jazz my beloved!!! he is so much kinder here in this fic and that was definitely something i was thankful for, even if the end goal was the same (make soundwave his husband/autobot) i liked the gentler approach in this fic with the cassettes all warming up to him or various other autobots (MASSIVE SHOUTOUT TO WHEELJACK HE IS AMAZING) but yeah jazz! he works so hard and is so in love with soundwave i chuckled a little when prowl and optimus took a jab at his (and soundwaves) obliviousness. also jazz repeatedly mentions this belief that he believes he is the inferior spy to soundwave and i don’t think that’s the case but hopefully jazz will see that too :( poor jazz

soundwave now! soundwave has been my favourite transformer since i was young and im aware thats a very popular choice but alas he is cool. and so mother. anyway i like the realistic approach in the beginning of soundwave choosing to escape from the autobots even though the doubts have already been sown into his mind about the decepticons because soundwaves loyalty to the cause is definitely one of the most defining aspects of his character but i like that the thing that causes him to give that loyalty up is his cassettes, with the scene of him attempting to escape only to witness buzzsaw’s death and the truth of his torture particularly just so sad but a believable reason for him to defect

other recurring have been delightful to read including ratchet, the cassettes, optimus and prowl and all the other various autobots

i did quite like the decision to have a decepticon perspective every once in a while because i truly to believe soundwave is the backbone of the whole army so it’s interesting to see them in such a dysfunctional manner and of course megatron needs to have every bad thing in the universe to happen to him because he deserves it all

anyway! this is an incredibly long ask and i will end my rambling here as its late where i am while typing this up (specifically 4:59 AM) i fear theres a good possibility this ask is incoherent but just know i am so utterly grateful to have read your amazing writing <33 that is all for now,

sincerely,

sleep deprived anon

Hi Anon,

I'm happy to announce you stayed coherent. It is such an honour and a surprise to see this in my inbox. Thank you for breaking down in sections what you enjoyed about the fic it made it easy to read and understand your thoughts. Jazz and Soundwave specifically are some of my all time favourite transformers (only eclipsed by my love for the combaticons). A lot of my writing decisions were made from the stance of 'what would x do in this situation' and I'd try to write it as closely to the character as I could. Nothing bugs me more than ooc writing and that was a big sticking point for me about the original is how they broke Soundwave severely.

I know a common complaint about the original was the icky feelings it gave people so i get that fic not being everyone's cup of tea if they were looking for pure hurt/comfort and not a dark fic. I'm glad you enjoyed my take even though I believe I delve into similar if not darker themes.

The choice to include the Decepticon perspective was done as a way to flesh out the loss and show how Soundwave was important instead of just saying it.

Everyone is wishing for Megatron's demise and to that I say:

Mechs like him don't die neatly, they always find a way to wiggle out of the mess they made.

Regards,

The well rested Author.

[boydepartment]

From sheep anon:

Oh boy, so I originally wanted to write about how I discovered skz, but then I saw the reasoning behind your username and I wanted to share a bit of my life with you. And then I realized that if I wrote all that I wanted to say, you would have a entire college thesis in your request box. So, uh, I'll try to condense this message as much as possible without losing the "rawness" of it. I'm actually really nervous about sending this message that I can feel my hands shaking. I hope this can inspire confidence in yourself and your writing. It's a bit of a vulnerable story, so don't read yet if you feel like it would bring your mood down, but I hope it helps you. =)

While reading your story behind your username, it reminded me of myself in some ways. I never felt like I had a talent or purpose in life. Like I was never destined for something that I could spend my entire life on chasing. I looked at other people who had a goal and knew what they wanted to do in life, and then looked at myself and saw nothing. So, I just believed that since I didn't have a talent, I would just have to work twice, no ten times harder than others. I would have to put in more effort in my work to make up for my lack of purpose. That's why your response to me was so precious. I felt like my reason for existing was to spread positivity and kindness, even if the world was cruel. To make people smile and laugh, and to prove to my younger self that the world was filled with kind people that would help each other. That's why I'll be eternally grateful for your comment and I hope you remember that we're here for you through thick and thin.

It's a whole lot easier to articulate things in my head, so I hope that was comprehensible. I believe that the most valuable part of writing is that it can connect people through shared emotions and inspire empathy and understanding. I don't really know how to end this, but here's quote from a wish that my past self had: "I want to be there for others, to support other people when they're feeling down and during the good times. Celebrate the wins and the losses. I want to live for others, see their pain and help them through it. So that one day, I can give the same kind of kindness to myself." Not sure if that's great advice, but maybe it'll help you during tough times. You are so strong for getting to where you are now, and you should be proud of what you have accomplished. Stay hydrated and remember that it's okay to not be okay. Hugs for everyone (⁠づ⁠｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡⁠)⁠づ

- 🐑

Sheep anon you never fail to amaze me with your messages in my request box. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your story with me. It truly means a lot that you are comfortable enough here on my tumblr to share. Spreading positivity as your purpose in life is so admirable, I am so glad you have found it. People like you make the world a little brighter day by day and we need that. Thank you for your advice, and thank you for making my day a little brighter with your messages. Remember to get sun today if you can, and stay healthy. I heard green tea has a lot of health benefits, especially if you add honey <3 Thank you again my dear for making the world a little sweeter

[levi-supreme]

Happy New Year sunshine! I wish you and your loved ones a holiday full of happiness and rest. Thank you for sharing with us a bit of your culture! I'm really interested in Asian countries' cultures ❤️

Oh yes, I saw it! I'm sure that would be a nice way to celebrate your birthday haha! Same here, I'm really excited for the new season and to see Levi again 👀

I'm always so happy and in awe to hear you're glad to have me on your blog and that you consider me a dear friend of yours. My heart feels so warm right now and that's all thanks to you. I know I'm repetitive haha, but thank you from the bottom of my heart. You're playing a big role in my road back to recovery and for that I'm eternally grateful. Remember the same goes for you! Whatever problem you're facing, I'm here to help you and give you the love you deserve so much 💖

Omg you make progress really fast haha. So glad to hear you keep enjoying the game and that you're almost done with the first part of the experience. Haha yes, those hybrid flowers seem easy to breed, but actually it's quite hard at the beginning. I still remember my failed attempts haha. Congratulations for your first hybrid flower dear! I'm sure it'll be followed by many others. Oh I've never heard that game before and I wasn't aware it existed a mobile version of animal crossing. If you didn't like it you did a good thing deleting it. I have some games on my phone I don't really play anymore, but I don't want to delete theme because I feel like maybe I could have a change of heart. However, that never happens and then I end up with my phone's memory clogged! I wish you good luck with your progress! But with the rapidity with which you proceed, you probably don't need it 💕

Oh god! I've always wanted to play God of War Ragnarok!! Unfortunately I have a Xbox and the game isn't avaible there, only on ps4/5. I hope your bf likes it and that he's having a good time. When I was younger I used to play Cooking Mama with my brother and we loved it so much! It may seem childish but it's actually a good game. Glad to hear you were able to convince him to buy it and that everything worked out in the end. Once or twice I played GTA with my cousin, I never learned how to drive properly there and I always broke the car by crashing into something. Omg same! I have those Pokémon toys that used to come with McDonald's Happy Meal too. Unfortunately, I don't know anymore where I put them haha 💙

I'm glad to hear you came to a decision regarding Levi's birthday this year. Keeping mind of your creativity, I'm sure it'll be a great event! I'm excited for it and I can't wait to se what you have in mind 💗

Talking about shyness, I feel like I'm ready to reveal myself to you! But I remember you saying once that you enjoy not knowing who I am. So I want to let you decide! I'm happy with being one of your emoji anons so please don't feel pressured! 😊

Yes, you're right. We've come a long way together and likewise, I'm thankful to have you as one of my dearest friends! 🥰🥹

No need to thank me! I read your shipping fics in the past and I was in awe! Like you said, you and Levi are perfect for each other. I feel like with you Levi would be so happy and content with life. I'm so glad to hear you've overcome your insecurities and that you're enjoying this experience!

Thank you so much for the message! You saying that I make you happy makes my heart melt! I'm the one who should thank you for your support, for chatting with me and for letting me become one of your emoji anons! Never apologize for taking your time to reply! I understand you perfectly. Enjoy your holiday sunshine, I love you 💞 ~[🧸]

Hi there my dearest 🧸 anon!!! Good day to you! Thank you so much for the well wishes! It's been raining the entire day and even though I'm not complaining... it's too cold XD I'm glad that I can show you bits and parts of East Asian and Southeast Asian culture over here!!! I'm so happy to hear that you're interested in learning about my culture too. There's probably only a few people here who understands my culture, and I'm really touched to hear these from you hehe. Other than spreading my love for Levi, my blog will also be here to spread the love for East and Southeast Asian culture too!!

Hahha for SNK to air on my birthday is either the best or worse way to celebrate tbh... But yes!! I can't wait to see Levi again 🥺💖 I'm sure everyone misses him terribly and we can't wait for him to appear on the big screen again <3

Hehe. I think I'm also very repetitive, because I'm always talking about how grateful I am to have such a supportive friend like you too! There may be lots of bad things happening on the internet all the time, but I'm glad to have found you! ^^ let's continue to support each other for a long long time ☺️

Hehe, yesterday (21/01) my new Residence Services opened and now I have Isabelle on my island!!! Yay!!!! And Tom Nook just started talking to me about building that campsite to invite K.K. Slider over 😂 and urgh I have to farm for iron nuggets again................ :/ I'm making friends with my island's residents and I'm having so much fun!! I love it when I gift them something and they give me clothes in return haha, it's so cool!!

Talking about hybrid flowers, I got a second pink windflower again! And I got an orange pansy too, and a second one is blooming ^^ I'm trying to manifest for my other flowers to have hybrids too... other than windflowers and pansies, I have hyacinths, cosmos, and mums!! My tulip seeds are still in my storage because I have too many flowers outside my house XD

Pocket camp is actually quite fun!! It's similar to acnh, but you're at a campsite instead of an island. I kinda liked it, but it was hard earning money and I wanted to get those spring-limited kimonos and sakura decorations etc, but then I didn't want to spend money on those lol... so I gave up pocket camp XD but I'm the same!! Sometimes I keep games on my phone because of nostalgia, and I think I'll go back to playing them one day. In the end, I don't and it's just there wasting space.... hahaha.

Well my bf finished God of War Ragnarok already!!! He was complaining about how ridiculously hard it was to get the platinum trophy for the game on the PS achievements, so he stopped playing and he's going to uninstall it haha. I don't follow the God of War series, so it was interesting to watch him playthrough Ragnarok too! Aww cooking mama is really fun!! I used to play it on my cousin's PSP and that's how I got to know cooking mama lol. He loves playing cooking mama now XD

Don't worry, I'm terrible at GTA too. I tried playing it and I failed my first mission miserably???? I keep banging my car and killing people too, so I gave up on the game HAHA. I think my pokemon toys are still somewhere in my room though... I hope I can find them some day hehe.

Since Levi's birthday falls on Christmas, my idea for Happy Birthday Levi this year somehow coincides with the theme of gifting hehe. I'll leave it as it is so that I don't drop anymore spoilers~

Awwww!! 🥺💖 haha, tbh I'm okay with either too! I would love to know who you are, but at the same time, I love the anonymity about you too! I love seeing you as my emoji anon! It feels like I am talking to a secret admirer XD don't feel pressurised to let me know your identity as well, I actually really do enjoy this 'mysterious' factor about not knowing who you are hehe.

Haha I'm glad I overcame that insecurity too! Ultimately, I started writing Levi fics because it makes me happy to show my love for my favourite character is this way, and I started selfshipping because it makes me happy too. I realised I shouldn't be embarrassed for being such a huge selfshipper, and as long as it makes me happy, why not! Even though not many people read my Reivi stuff, I know that there will always be people out there who do read them and that's good enough for me 🥰

Thank you so much for this very thoughtful message too my dearest 🧸!! I appreciate you a lot and I am always keeping you in my thoughts 💚 also, not sure if you saw, but I made a discord server for my followers here!! There's not many of us yet, and I'm still trying to make it a nice cosy place just like my blog too hehe. If you have discord, feel free to join my server!! But same thing: please don't feel pressurised to do so as well ☺️ take care of yourself, and I'm looking forward to hear from you again!!! (*^^*)

[maaarshieee]

hey hi! i saw u asking for dottore requests so here i am with one :)

how about what a relationship w dottore is like while ur both attending the akademiya? before he was expelled? i would love to see ur interpretation on what he was like and what it was like to be with him!

also for the reader could i possibly ask it to be male? if not then gender neutral is fine! thank u in advance! <33

⎯⎯ ୨ 𝐀𝐤𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐲𝐚 𝐃𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐇𝐂𝐬 𝐰/ 𝐃𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐞 ୧ ⎯⎯

➢ Iʟ Dᴏᴛᴛᴏʀᴇ x Gɴ!Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

➢ Mᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

a/n - ANON THANK YOU SO MUCH IVE BEEN ACTUALLY THINKING ABOUT WRITING THIS ILYSM /P this wasn't my best but honestly i just needed to write him,, titled "akademiya days HCs w/ dottore", have a good day/night!! ALSO PLS REQUEST THIS MAN, I PROMISE I CAN WRITE BETTER THAN THSI.

↬ cw: established long-term relationship with reader, mentions of experiments, canon typical violence, slight obsession (basic dottore warnings) usage of the name 'zandik' for dottore

You've known him, Zandik, for as long as you can remember. From childhood to your teenage years. Together, you were chased out of your hometown. Him, for being a "madman", and you, for supporting and even encouraging his maniacal tendencies.

You only went to Sumeru Akademiya to be with him since the two of you were practically inseparable. You wanted to stay by his side and help him with his experiments. That, and also the fact he needed you.

He will never outright express it, but without you, it just doesn't feel right. Like he's missing something very important. You.

At first, it didn't really mean anything to him when you stayed, but the more you stuck around? The more he was internally grateful for you staying with him, even if he wasn't the best to be with.

And the more he has to keep you with him. No matter what. Luckily, you're not letting go of him either. The two of you were a perfect match. Both have loose screws in their heads and are madly in need of each other.

Perhaps for eternity.

So he does these things for you when the two of you shared a house back in Sumeru. It's always the little things about with him. Doing the laundry before you do it, organizing your files of research when you fall asleep on your desk in midst of trying to finish them, helping you with your studies, and many more.

Sometimes he'd add notes and corrections to your research papers whenever he happens to get his hands on them.

Zandik knew you were never engrossed in researching and would rather do things with his instructions instead, so he'd help you do your tasks if it meant keeping you close to him at all times.

He'd cook you breakfast if he wasn't too busy, but he'd always complain about he has to cook for the two of you every morning when you can always just cook for yourself, albeit later, and won't be eating with him.

Zandik is so subtle in showing his love for you, but you've been with him for so long, enough to be able to understand what his actions meant. But back when you were at the Akademiya? He was like a househusband. Hell, he even folded your clothes for you and you had to scold him to stop.

He merely rolled his eyes, saying; "Your room is a mess. How can you live in this filth?"

You're caressing my clothes like a weirdo, is what you wanted to say but you knew better and kept your mouth shut. After all, you'd often steal his clothes, just wrap them around you and inhale his scent.

Since he's the type to never really mingle around others, often intimidating them or just being plain rude enough for them to start avoiding him, you took the role of being the sociable one. Basically talking to others to get more information about anything and if it's of use, you'd tell Zandik.

And he greatly appreciates how helpful you are, especially when he abhors conversing with seemingly brainless, so-called scholars of Sumeru.

You're really the only person he could tolerate the most.

Always together. From walking the halls of the Akademiya, in classes, libraries, anywhere. Anyone who knows you would always see you together. It was always odd when the other is absent next to them.

Though, to others, sometimes it wasn't clear if the two of you were in a relationship or just really close friends. Mostly because the two of you never indulge in (obvious) PDA.

Scholars would see the two of you in the library, minding each other's business, and would occasionally speak to each other. Or the banter the two of you would share here in there, usually consisting of you crying to annoy Zandik and him telling you to shut up.

But they don't even notice the hand he'd always have at the small of your back. Or the way he'd ask you if you need any help with your research. Or the way he'd always bring you coffee when he buys one himself.

It's not like both of you hate PDA, it's more like you act naturally with each other. Sometimes you'd even hold onto his arm, to which he would give you a questioning look but would never push you away.

It's the subtly outsiders of your relationship won't ever get. And you both prefer it that way.

Back at the Akademiya, it was rather docile and tame beside the secret experiments behind closed doors. Being with him was both chaotic and calm.

One moment he'd be making a fuss about his experiments to you, willingly doing errands for him to quell his frustrations, then you'd be laying on the floor, dozing off to the sounds of pen scribbling on paper, a small huff of amusement coming from Zandik.

There were many things he'd do for you, and you share the same sentiment. So, if someone were to insult you? Make you uncomfortable or just look at you in the wrong way? Well, next time you'll be seeing them strapped on a metal bed.

───── ❝ encore! ❞ ─────

"I'm honestly running out of ideas." You sighed, an arm covering your eyes while you sprawled yourself onto the cool floor. Papers surrounded your laid form, an utter mess in the middle of Zandik's way whilst he just wanted to go towards the kitchen to prepare dinner for both of you.

You were supposed to do your chores for tonight, but it's clear he'd also have to take up those tasks as well. Not when you're lamenting your own 'doom' if you've not passed your research on its due date. Not like you cared about graduating, you just thought it would be nice to achieve something while you're at Sumeru Akademiya. And now you're at risk of not graduating if you don't pass it in time.

Zandik always found humor in the way you'd fuss over your research though. You always said you've never cared, but it was clearly obvious you did. He knew you had other goals before you indulged yourself in his, so he never held you back on your own research and experiments while you were at the Akademiya. It's also nice to see you so dedicated to other things, especially if it's something you're very passionate about.

"Who knew this would be much more stressful than your research?" You grunted when Zandik nudged you to move aside with his foot, unceremoniously stepping on your thesis papers which earned a glare from you. "I hate the Akademiya..." You'd mumbler under your breath. He merely scoffed at your behavior, ignoring your existence once he finally arrived at the kitchen.

Knowing him, you sat up from the floor and made sure you were a meter away from the line drawn on the ground. Zandik put that there since, as it turns out, you're never to be trusted in the kitchen, with or without his supervision. He couldn't simply comprehend how the kitchen was up in flames when he turned away for a few moments, mistakenly trusting you to cook eggs. Eggs.

A hazard is what he calls you. So the kitchen became his territory in the house you shared. You're only allowed to enter after he's done cooking. If you somehow find yourself in the kitchen? Expect a flying spatula right at your face. You never really minded, you always preferred his cooking.

Plus, you get to see him roll up his sleeves and put on an apron.

When he was finished, he called out your name, inviting you into the kitchen. Once you entered, your stomach immediately let out a loud growl as your mouth watered at the sight of your favorite food. "Oh, is there an occasion?" You asked, taking a seat opposite of him, and immediately started digging in after you'd thanked him.

Zandik raised a brow at you, sipping on his cup of tea before saying; "No, nothing of sorts." You just let out a thoughtful hum, a smile etching your lips at each bite.

"Ah, then why?" He could only sigh at your question, grabbing a napkin and wiping the mess you've made at the corners of your mouth and your chin. You only leaned in closer, staring at his crimson eyes.

"Do I require a reason to cook something you like? It just happened to be what's available for tonight." He scoffed, shaking his head, and went back to eating his food with an annoyed expression.

You let out a silent chuckle, letting it go, and continued to eat instead. You guess that he needn't a reason, but you felt so much better after he cooked your favorite meal.

He's never straightforward with you sometimes, no? Well, as they say, actions speak louder than words.

If you want to be tagged in future works, fill out this form to be added to my taglist! Remember that usernames are only lowercase and have no spaces!

Taglist: @anniejourn, @dilucssiliconedildo, @achlysyo, @sunoo-bby

- ̥۪͙۪˚┊❛❛ If you like this a lot, consider reblogging! I'll appreciate it very very much! Don't repost and/or translate my work anywhere. ❜❜ ┊˚ ̥۪͙۪◌

[rubysunnday]

helping hand

Request by anon: If requests are still open can you do sentence prompts #2 and #4 with Kaz and romantic reader? Congrats on all the followers! You do an awesome job and deserve all the love!!

Summary: Three times Kaz let Jesper help Y/N and one time he summoned the confidence to do it himself

warning: mentions of blood and other six of crows things

Y/N wouldn't say she was a naturally clumsy person - alright, fine, she was a naturally clumsy person. There was a certain nuance it took to become so clumsy without doing it on purpose. From knocking over an entire shelf of alcohol in the Crow Club to accidentally stabbing Kaz, there was an ever-growing list of clumsy things she'd done.

This, however, definitely took the ticket.

"I don't understand what you tripped over."

"Does it matter?'

"Well, no, but I'm curious."

"Jesper, I am hanging on for dear life and you want to discuss this now?"

Jesper shrugged. He tilted his head to the side and put a hand under his chin. "Are you sure -"

"Yes, I am sure I am stuck, now will you please pull me back up before I fall into this bloody canal," Y/N snapped, glaring up at Jesper.

Jesper sighed but knelt down, wrapping a hand around Y/N's wrist and quickly pulling her off the edge of the bridge she'd somehow almost fallen off of.

Kaz was watching from the shadows, a deep ache in his chest as he watched Y/N fall onto Jesper and drop her head onto his chest in relief. He yearned for the day that he could be the one to hold her hand and touch her without feeling like he was drowning.

But until then, he had to stand by and watch Jesper jump to his feet and hold out a hand to Y/N. She put her hand in his and Kaz felt a wave of jealously at the way Jesper's hand entwined with hers, at how she let him pull her to her feet. At the familiarity, the two clearly had with one another.

"Thank you," Y/N said, wrapping her arms around Jesper and hugging him.

"Anytime, love," Jesper replied, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

Kaz clenched his jaw tightly. "If you two are quite finished, we have a job to do."

And with that, he pushed himself off the wall and limped down the alley, his cane clicking against the cobbles.

"What's his issue?" Y/N asked, frowning.

"He's Kaz, his middle name is issues," Jesper muttered, throwing an arm around Y/N's shoulders.

Y/N turned her head away as Jesper pulled up her sleeve. Dark, red blood dripped down her arm, following her veins to her hand.

"Do you not like blood?" Jesper asked, watching Y/N's eyes scrunch shut.

"I don't like my own blood," Y/N replied, her nails digging into her palm. "I can cope with anyone else's but the moment it's mine..."

Y/N trailed off and a shudder went through her body.

Kaz watched from the shadows, Inej perched on a chair by his side, silently cleaning her knives. He knew about Y/N's phobia of blood - he'd discovered it in her first month of being a member of the Dregs.

It had been Y/N's most embarrassing moment - passing out at the feet of her boss was not on her list of things to do to impress him.

But Kaz hadn't said anything to anyone - not even when he called Inej in to help Y/N up. He'd just said she'd forgotten to eat.

And for that, Y/N had been eternally grateful.

"I am sorry," Inej called, looking over at her.

"Inej, it isn't your fault, I got in the way," Y/N replied, opening her eyes and looking at her friend, giving her a reassuring smile.

Jesper paused. "Now, hang on. When I accidentally shoot you, I'm at fault, yet when Inej stabs you in the arm, she gets off scot-free?"

"Unlike you, Jesper, Inej cannot control where her knives fly or if I get shoved in the path of one," Y/N replied, turning to look at him and instantly regretting it as she caught a glimpse of the blood trailing down her arm.

She quickly turned away again but Kaz, who was watching her and only her, noticed the colour in her skin fade and her hands began to shake. He readjusted his grip on his cane as the urge to walk up to her and take her hand began to drown him.

"Don't pass out on me," Jesper warned. Despite his joking tone, Jesper did move closer to Y/N, his leg resting against hers.

"If I do, I know I won't live it down," Y/N mumbled dropping her head back against the wall. 'Again' she added silently. "It'll be like the time you shot yourself in the foot, Jes."

"I didn't shoot myself in the foot -"

"Yes, you did," Inej cut in, a smile pulling on the edges of her lips. "I remember the squawk of pain when you did it and I also remember Y/N falling over with laughter."

Jesper glowered at Inej but his displeasure at being reminded of the tale just made Y/N giggle.

Kaz bit the inside of his cheek as he heard her laugh and looked down at the floor. Y/N's laughter was the equivalent of coins landing on his desk - it made him happy and give him a weird, fluttering feeling inside his chest.

Kaz forced himself to get out of his head. "I'll find us some transport, Y/N, don't die while I'm gone."

Jesper and Y/N looked up at Kaz as he limped off out the shed they were hiding in without so much as a glance back.

"Every time I think he's exceeded my expectations, he manages to exceed them even more," Jesper muttered, but his tone held no venom or hatred.

Y/N stared at the door Kaz had walked out of with a sense of wanting inside her. Wanting something that would never happen and yearning after someone who could never reciprocate her feelings.

Y/N swore as she lost the grip on her necklace again, the chain falling down her blouse.

"You good over there?" Jesper asked curiously, looking up from the map he was studying with Kaz.

"I can't get this saint-forsaken necklace on," Y/N muttered, fishing the necklace out of her blouse and trying again, the clasp slipping between her fingers. "Oh, for fuck's sake!"

"Let me," Jesper said, shaking his head with a laugh as he jumped up. Y/N held the necklace out to him, lifting her hair out the way and tilting her neck down.

Kaz tried not to watch. He tried to keep his eyes on the map and ignore the way Jesper straightened the necklace, his fingers brushing the back of Y/N's neck. Kaz realised he'd looked up and immediately looked back down again. He winced slightly as he moved his leg and cleared his throat.

"Jesper, Y/N, you'll go in disguised as one of the performers," Kaz said, his voice slightly croakier than usual.

"I still think this outfit is ridiculous," Y/N grumbled, plucking at the poofy sleeved blouse that was hanging off her shoulders.

"I think it suits you," Jesper replied, leaning on the table and crossing his arms, looking her up and down. "The corset pulls it all together."

Y/N narrowed her eyes at him. "Fahey, stop ogling me."

"Sorry, ma'am."

Y/N pulled the strap of her corset back up and wiggled it around a bit. She wasn't used to the heavy layers of fabric and the rigid boning of the corset that restricted how she moved. She missed her lighter clothes and she missed her weapons.

"Ok, is this... performer ish?" Y/N asked, turning around in a circle, arms out either side.

"Oh, your corset's come undone," Jesper said, pushing himself to his feet.

Y/N turned her back to him and Jesper quickly undid the knot and pulled the lacing of the corset tighter.

"Oh, ok," Y/N said, stumbling back into Jesper as he yanked a little to hard.

"Oops, sorry, love," Jesper said, letting out a snort of laughter as he tugged on the laces and Y/N wobbled again

"Jesper, stop trying to kill me!" Y/N exclaimed, reaching behind her and whacking his arm.

Kaz just watched with deep yearning in his heart. He cursed Jodie, he cursed Pekka Rollins and he cursed Kaz Rietveld for making him this way. For breaking him. For making him incapable of love and of touching anyone.

He yearned to be able to hold her hand the way Inej and Jesper could. All Kaz wanted to do was be able to touch her without drowning and without feeling like he might vomit.

But, for now, he watched Jesper touch her and hug her and kiss her and watched Y/N smile back at him, her little finger wrapped around his.

Because she wasn't broken. She was still in one piece.

"Can you stand on it?"

Y/N pushed herself up off the barrel that she was sat on and gingerly began putting weight on her right ankle. She barely even managed to put a quarter of her weight on it before she hissed in pain and sat back down, breathing deeply.

"Not unless you want me to pass out," Y/N replied, squeezing her eyes tightly shut and trying to slow her breathing down. "And we both know how that went last time."

Kaz sighed. He was beginning to regret sending Inej and Jesper off together.

"What if you use my cane?"

Y/N's head shot up and her eyes opened wide - it was almost comical. She looked like she'd been switched on - she actually looked like a lightbulb being turned on.

"What?'

Kaz rolled his eyes. "Have you gone deaf as well as lame?"

"No."

"Then answer the question."

Y/N pressed her lips together, eyeing the cane resting in Kaz's gloved hands. "It'll be slow going with both of us limping."

"I meant to ask - did you mean to injure your right ankle?"

Y/N frowned. "Kaz, love, I didn't mean to injure it full stop! Why?"

Kaz shook his head. "No reason," he said, but his eyes glanced down at his right leg - the one he'd broken at fourteen.

"Right, give me your cane," Y/N said, pushing herself up to her feet, standing on her left leg, her position making her look a bit like a flamingo. Just distinctly less feathery.

Kaz handed it to her, taking a sharp breath in as their hands brushed for a second.

Y/N put a hand on the crow's head, lifting her fingers up and down as she got used to the feel of it. She put it down on the ground and then leant on it as she took a slow, painful step forward, her limp obvious.

"Ok, we can do this," Y/N said, mainly to reassure herself.

She wasn't sure they could do it - they were both down a leg and Kaz, despite his offer of his cane, was struggling. On the bright side, they could probably enter a three-legged race and potentially win, but stumbling through the streets of Ketterdam wasn't the same as hobbling through a grassy field in Ravka.

Kaz watched Y/N take another wobbly step forward and noticed the way she grimaced with pain as she did so and how shaky her other leg was.

Kaz Rietveld took over before Dirtyhands could argue.

"Here, lean on me."

Y/N barely spared him a glance. "I am perfectly -"

"I know, but, please, just humour me."

Y/N stopped. She looked up at Kaz, her face serious. "Are you sure, Kaz? You don't have to, I can -"

"I know you can," Kaz replied, cutting her off. "But I can... I can also see how much pain you are in and so," he offered his arm, "here."

Y/N looked up at him and into his eyes. She'd never understood authors who would go into extensive detail about someone's eyes. About how they were as green as emeralds or as blue as the ocean which was factually incorrect since the ocean was clear.

But Kaz's eyes were literally a storm. The emotions and memories swirling around created the perfect storm. But within that storm was a determined little ship, riding each and every wave. Yes, it occasionally got soaked and almost sank but it popped up on top of every wave.

Y/N put her arm through Kaz's.

For some reason, she flinched when she touched his arm. It was only the second time in their friendship that they'd touched - the first being to shake hands to confirm that she was a part of the Dregs.

She felt Kaz stiffen and gave him a moment to grab control of his mind, fully prepared to let go if he needed her to.

Kaz could feel the tug and pull of the waters - the urge to let go overwhelming him as the waters did. He could feel the saltwater in his mouth and shivered slightly as he remembered how cold the water had been.

Y/N shifted, gripping his arm for a moment before loosening her grip. Kaz looked down at her hand. It rested on top of his thick, woollen coat - there were several layers between her hand and his skin yet he could still feel the heat of her hand.

The heat pushed the waters away. They guided him through the waters, through the storm, like a lighthouse. Y/N stood there, swaying every so often, waiting for him to tell her what to do next. She was like his lighthouse - her light guiding him to the shallows.

The waters lapped at his shins.

"Ready?" Kaz asked quietly, his voice rough and hoarse.

Y/N nodded, not trusting herself to speak, worried she might ruin the understanding Kaz had come to with himself.

Slowly, the two of them began walking back to the Slat, Y/N leaning on Kaz and relying on his cane to help lessen the pressure and weight on her ankle.

Y/N looked up at Kaz as they walked. "Thank you."

Kaz nodded. He glanced down at her and his face softened slightly. "It's fine."

It wasn't just fine. It was a massive gesture. Kaz was trusting her and she was trusting Kaz. But neither one said anything out of fear of scaring themselves.

So, the two broken members of Brekker's Crows limped back to the Slat, relying on each other like a ship does a lighthouse in the midst of a dark, stormy night.

[the-lonelybarricade]

for the feysand oneshot, how abouuuutttt............ omg a feysand wedding!!!!! we've been deprived of it and you're the only one i trust to write it correctly :D

Hello my lovely anon! Sorry it took me so long to get to this one, I got a bit swept away yesterday and then I was prepping for the ACoFD upload today, but we got to it in the end! This one was a little tough for me because I may or have not already written a Feysand wedding scene for ACoFD and I didn't want this one to by a copycat.

Anway, here's a short and canon compliant wedding scene starting immediately after the end of chapter 60 in ACoMaF:

Read on AO3

“So I won my wedding ring without even being asked if I wanted to marry you.”

“Perhaps.”

Feyre cocked her head. “Do--do you want me to wear it?”

“Only if you want to.”

“When we go to Hybern… Let’s say things go badly. Will anyone be able to tell that we’re mated? Could they use that against you?”

Rage flickered in his eyes. “If they see us together and can scent us both, they’ll know.”

“And I show up alone, wearing a Night Court wedding ring--”

He snarled softly.

Feyre closed the box, leaving the ring inside. “After we nullify the Cauldron, I want to do it all. Get the bond declared, get married, throw a stupid party and invite everyone in Velaris--all of it.”

Rhys took the box from Feyre’s hands and set it down on the nightstand before herding her toward the bed. “And what if I wanted to go one step beyond that?”

“I’m listening,” she purred as he laid her on the sheets.

And Rhys slowly explained his plan to Feyre as he unwound her in his arms. A whisper of words across the valley of her chest, his tongue and lips emphasizing each promise of devotion. He summarized the vows with his head buried between her legs, and explained the ceremony as their body joined. It was certainly a thorough demonstration. Once Feyre had thoroughly become undone in his embrace, he kissed her lips, her neck, her stomach, her legs, and helped her dress.

Still lost to the stupor of their love-making, they snuck out of the town house with a twin pair of elated grins. Rhys looked about as dazed and in love as Feyre felt. She took the moment to savour the feeling, understanding that it was fleeting. That tomorrow, they’d wake up and go to war. But right now, she was walking through Velaris with her mate at her side and the stars above and everything was as it should be. This taste of bliss, it would be worth whatever tomorrow brings.

When they arrived at the temple, the two of them were nearly giddy, drunk on the love and joy throbbing through the golden thread that tied them together. Their sacred bond. The High Priestess was already waiting at the entrance, having been mentally notified of their arrival by Rhysand. She offered them a pleasant smile beneath the hood of her blue robe and bowed her head respectfully before she led them through the temple.

They were escorted into a room with large moonstone arches in place of windows, the space completely open to the soft, saltwater breeze blowing in from the Sidra. The ceiling above was carved with markings reminiscent of Night Court and at its apex, it opened to the night sky. Feyre stared up in awe, marvelling at the waxing moon that shone through, bright and bold among the star-swept sky. It was the perfect place to offer her heart to her mate and his court.

Feyre turned to face Rhys. He was staring at her, adoration plain on his face, and her face heated to realize that he’d been marvelling her in mirror to her gaping at the temple.

Of the glorious sights in the world, Feyre, your beauty surpasses all.

She raised her brows, stepping closer to her mate to play at adjusting the lapels of his jacket. The sight before me certainly challenges such a statement. She made a point of sweeping her gaze over him, stopping at those heartbreaking eyes that were staring at her with such a soft love. Feyre swallowed thickly, feeling all at once enveloped in warmth, like she’d been bundled in a pool of silk.

Rhys swept his arms around her, encircling her in his embrace as he pulled her closer. Then what a view the pair of us must be, he mused.

The High Priestess had been scurrying about, gathering items for the ceremony, but now she appeared at their side. Any mortal notions about modesty didn’t seem to exist in fae ceremonies, for the priestess seemed almost encouraged by the way Feyre and Rhys were clutching onto each other. She made no move to separate them as she began the proceedings, and Feyre was grateful for being able to stay in Rhysand’s arms, safe and warm and complete.

“Feyre Cursebreaker,” she began, her voice loud and clear. It echoed in the open space of the room, carried through the gentle wind, “do you swear to protect and serve the Night Court; to uphold its laws and stand against its enemies; to lead and govern its people; to be a just ruler; and to bow to no and nothing but your crown?”

Feyre pulled away from Rhysand’s embrace, but kept his hand grasped firmly in her own as she faced the High Priestess. “I swear on my life,” she answered resolutely. “I will protect and serve the Night Court and its people. I will lead and govern as a just ruler, and I will uphold the Night Courts laws and stand against its enemies. I will bow to no and nothing but my crown.”

“Kneel now, Cursebreaker, to your crown and country.” The High Priestess gestured to the symbols carved into the moonstone floor and Feyre realized they were standing on the inside circle of the Night Court emblem, the High Priestess just outside the carving.

Feyre nodded, bowing to her knees before the three stars of Ramiel engraved on the floor. The Priestess retrieved a shallow bowl she’d placed on the ground and raised it before Feyre.

“Drink now, from the water that flows through the streams of Ramiel, and let the Mother bless and protect you as the High Lady of the Night Court.”

Feyre raised her chin and drank from the bowl, letting the cool water stay on her tongue as she sent a silent thank you to the Mother and her Cauldron, for having been blessed with such a place to call home, and such a mate to stand beside. And as she drank, she felt her right hand tingle as a twin to her bargain tattoo etched itself into her skin like a lace glove, marking her as High Lady.

When the High Priestess removed the bowl, Rhys was instantly there, fingers placed under her chin. He used that contact point to raise her back to her feet until their lips met. He kissed her so tenderly it scorched her soul, branded her there irrevocably. No one’s touch would ever feel so harmonious, so magnetic.

Then, Rhys pulled away. For a brief second their eyes met, and the burning reverence she saw in those starkissed eyes was staggering. Her whole body felt ablaze as he dropped to his own knees before her, drawing the back of her hand to his lips. “My Lady,” he breathed, his voice thick with emotion. “I will protect and serve. Always. Your word, your command, your will, they are as good as my own, and I will uphold them all. Every breath I take, it will be in your service. Everything that I have, it is yours. Will you take me, as your mate and husband and High Lord?”

“I will,” Feyre said, her voice cracking on the word as she fought against the emotion that clogged her throat, that stung the back of her eyes. Were High Ladies allowed to become blubbering, happy messes in the sacred temples?

Your High Lord has already become one, so I don’t see why High Ladies should be excluded, Rhys murmured. Feyre met his glittering eyes, where tears fell freely down his cheeks. With a sob, Feyre joined him on the floor, both of them kneeling together on the Night Court emblem.

“Will you take me, Rhysand?” Feyre managed to choke out through her tears. “As your mate and wife and High Lady?”

“I already have,” he whispered. “From the moment I met you, and long before that. I have loved you and accepted you as anything you would offer to me. And I always will. My wife, my mate, my High Lady. I love you with everything I am.”

“I love you too, Rhys,” she answered, throwing her arms around his neck to crash her lips to his.

She could taste the salt of their tears, but beyond that she could taste him. Her mate, the soul for her soul, the very person she’d been searching for all her life. And as they burned together on the temple floor, as bright and enduring as the stars themselves, Feyre thought that she was finding more than her other half. She was finding herself, her family, her home, everything that had always felt unattainable and farfetched. For so long she’d never known what it was to be loved, but now, in her husband’s arms, crowned as his equal in every way, she felt so much more than that.

For the first time since turning High Fae, she truly felt immortal. Powerful, everlasting, eternal. High on love and life as she kissed her mate endlessly under the blanket of moonlight. She’d never dreamed she could feel this way, so liberated, so unabatedly happy.

To the people who look up at the stars and wish, Rhys.

To the stars who listen, mate. And the dreams, like this one, that are answered.

Taglist:  @cretaceous-therapod @live-the-fangirl-life @feybaenc @imsecretlyaherondale-blog @tanvee1231

[heretherebedork]

Hi! I just wanted to say how eternally gratefull i am for your meta posts. I struggle grately with grasping all the layers, and connecting the dots of why, who, when, what etc. and also have the memory of a goldfish, so i dont fully remember what happened in previous episodes (especially watching something as it's airing 1ep per week), and all that half the time makes me not understand and appreciate the bigger picture, and generally what's trully going on. And so, always as soon as i finish an episode, i go to your blog as i know you'll have all the hows and whys neatly explained with a pretty bow on top, and having read that i have all the lightbubs of appreciation (towards you and the show) going of. So once again thank you so so much for your time ❤🌻

Thank you very much anon! I'm so glad you enjoy my meta and I can help you understand everything! It's one of the reasons I love writing metaanalysis so much, it helps me put things together as well and figure out and notice new things.

Glad to have you here, hope you stay, feel free to send me asks about anything you want me to talk about specifically! I do my best to cover everything but you never know what'll spark me losing my mind over a whole new concept.