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vanchlo · 4 years ago

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The Assistant / Chapter Forty-One, “Finally”

*Gifs are not mine*

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Warnings: None

Word Count: 10.3k words

Song: You’re Still The One by Shania Twain, bc duh Just Like Heaven by The Cure (click to listen)

A/N: I am SO excited for you to read this chapter, you’ll soon find out why ;)

SNEAKYYYYYY PEEEEEK

For the fiftieth time in the last two days, I couldn’t be more grateful for how easy things are coming together. I couldn’t be more thankful to have him by my side. It still feels like a dream getting to live this life now, and getting to work with him on the daily, singing Spice Girls amidst stolen cheek kisses.

One puzzle piece at a time, and there’s only one or two pieces left in this puzzle of ours.

"And then my soul saw you and it kind of went ‘Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you.’"

- Iain Thomas, ‘I Wrote This For You’

There was truly nothing that could rock the waves I was currently riding, and I couldn’t wait a second longer to do the very thing that would make them even bigger. They had only climbed since telling Asher earlier this evening, and the smile that shared on our faces.

Skye was sprawled out on the sofa when I opened the door, finding it impossible to hide the grin on my face as I read a text from Harry that had dinged a moment before.

i havent been this excited for somethin in a long time bug. absolutely cant wait to see u on friday, idk if i can wait that long ;) good luck on ur case with Myles 2moro, you’ll do great Becks xo

“Well, look who has a pep in her step, all of a sudden. I don’t think I’ve seen you smile in days, since Harry’s left. What’s the occasion, Ree?” she teases, surprising me with the simple act of muting an episode of The Great British Bake Off that our nights consist of as of late.

“I may have had a good day,” I suggest with a shrug of my shoulders as I put my coat away in the closet.

“Since bloody when? You were in a shitty mood the last time we spoke, having ‘Harry withdrawals,’ or something. I’d say the only reason you could be happy right now is if you’d seen him, which would be impossible seeing he’s in Glasgow for another few days,” she mutters. I observe the look on her face change and how her eyebrows dance along her forehead after I turn around to face her, letting the smile lose. “Wait, he’s still there, isn’t he?” she questions, reaching a hand out as if looking for an answer with her body, too.

My head shakes from side to side slowly as my lips part to show my teeth, a rarity among my smiles, and the expression dawning on her face tells me she recognizes it too. “He came back today, his case finished early, Skye. And I asked him out on a date!”

“You didn’t?! Ree, you better not be kidding with me, or I’m gonna be really pissed at you!” she chuckles, feigning intimidation in her voice. Hints of the emotions buzzing around inside of me play across her face, meanwhile, my happiness keeps growing notch after notch.

I don’t know if I can wait that long either, Harry, cause I can’t remember the last time I was this excited. Thank you so much xxx

“I’m not kidding, Skye, and he said yes! He didn’t even let me finish asking and he said yes!” I exclaim after sending the text I had been typing, feeling her arms come around me in a shock when I look back up.

“I’m so fucking happy for you, Ree, it’s about bloody time!” she remarks excitedly, almost crushing me in a hug.

“Me too, I can’t remember the last time I was this happy,” I admit softly, relaxing in her arms, even though part of me wishes they were the arms of somebody else. Only an hour later, and I already miss him. Wow, I’ve got this bad.

“Did you kiss him at least?!”

“No, I’m waiting for the date, I guess. I looked like proper crap today, I’ve been up so late the last few nights prepping for the case with Myles,” I laugh, pulling away from her smell of peaches and chocolate when my pocket dings.

“First kisses aren’t something you plan, Ree, they just happen out of nowhere. The sooner, the better.”

“I guess you’re right,” I confess with a smile stuck to my lips. “We’ll just see what happens.”

Happiness and its synonyms still fill me to the brim an hour later, and whilst my thumbs flit across the screen of my phone. Her words stare back at me, and unbeknownst to me how, I wish I could see her again already. My footsteps wander down the main hallway, and before I know what I’m doing, I arrive at her door. Low and behold, it’s closed and my heart sinks into my chest when I find darkness waiting behind it.

miss u already bug xoxo

My words are whisked off to her, and soon my legs are entering the doorway of a certain somebody’s office, although not the one I was hoping for.

“It’s about time you made your rounds and came to say hi to me. Should I feel offended I’m the last one on your list?” Myles teases from behind his desk with a grin lining his lips.

“Oh, shuddup. Did Becks leave already fer tha night?” I question, letting my shoulder fall to the door frame as I watch the small ‘delivered’ appear under my blue text.

“Yeah, I ran into her about twenty minutes ago in the break room when she was clocking out. What, didn’t you already see her?”

“Ya, she was me first visitor. I was jus’ hopin’ t’ see her ‘gain,” I shrug, well aware of the terrible job I’m doing of hiding the one hundred watt smile I’m wearing.

“And does that have anything to do with you blinding me with that smile of yours?” he inquires, raising a sandy blonde eyebrow at me.

“Maybe it has sumthin’ t’ do with me havin’ a date with her on Friday, as of an hour ago,” I reveal casually with a shrug of my shoulders, feeling the smile grow larger somehow.

“Fucking finally,” Myles chimes with happiness spreading across his face, and I nod quickly.

“I know, ‘s all finally comin’ t’getha fer us.”

It would be accurate to say that I was still in utter disbelief after yesterday, and rehashing it all to Skye the second I got home only made it all seem more real, and even better. Then again, that was an understatement, because I had been waiting for this for years. I had been waiting to feel this way for too long, and to be able to say and think that I have a date with Harry tomorrow. An actual, proper date. Several times, I cursed myself for not making the date on Thursday night, tonight, because although I had waited painstakingly for five days, another two felt like twenty years.

It was even bittersweet coming to work the next day and not seeing him there, confusing the habits and expectations I had come to know. I still had to finish up the case with Myles that he would finish arguing, with my help, for the next two days. I tried to think of it that way, that the date would be even better after finishing that case, and in a way, signifying my return to Harry. God, it was all too perfect, but it would be even more so if I didn’t have to wait another bloody day, well actually two, to see him. Yesterday wasn’t long enough, but when I think about it, no length of time ever is with him and that’s how I know I’m in trouble.

Also, that I’m walking right into one of my dreams.

After a morning spent in court starting off the case, I was back at the firm with Myles after lunch to work on it some more. He had given me more time to myself to work on my own than Harry had, but I preferred it that way. Harry was right, Myles was good to me, and I did learn a lot from him, but it wasn’t the same as being with Harry. Nothing has ever and never will be the same as being with him, certainly not. Also, the whole Family and Interpersonal side of court was depressing as fuck, I found out. The topic littered Harry and I’s conversations the last almost week, resulting in me taking after him and deciding to stay far away from it for now.

I’m reminded of him everywhere I go, and it definitely makes trying to get my work done all the more difficult. I see his face in the succulent sat at the corner of my desk, behind my office chair where he would lean over me to help me on my laptop, on my sofa where he opened his birthday presents with explosive happiness, and in the reflection on the tall window where I now stand in the same spot as on his birthday when he hugged me against his front with a kiss to my head. A day later, and it all still feels so surreal to me, and I’m not mad about it. I appreciate its distracting qualities, leaving me to not worry as much about what the hell I’m going to wear tomorrow, and messing things up. Skye’s already picked out five outfits for me by now, I’m sure, but I was at a loss last night when I perused my closet. The pressure to impress somebody I’ve already met a hundred times, feels even greater than my second interview I had at the firm, and I tell myself I don’t know why, even though I do.

I want to wear the right thing, and feel beautiful. More than that, I don’t want to mess things up between us, again, no matter how stupid that sounds. No matter how premature it is to worry about right now.

With the happiest of sighs, I wander over to my bookshelf that now sits a dozen law books, gifts from Harry, Skye, Robbie, my dad, and Asher. Perhaps my favorite, to no surprise, is the Lawyer’s Dictionary that Harry got me. It has a section for all of the law jargon, another on many important laws, and lastly finishes with a guide for working the courtroom. I was just getting on my tippy toes to grab it when I feel a pair of arms surround my chest and pull me against theirs.

“Hiya, brat,” a voice teases, tickling my neck.

“Harry!” I exclaim with surprise, grabbing hold of his forearms. “Why do you love to scare me so much?”

“I dunno, ‘s fun, and coz yer a brat, so ya deserve it,” he giggles, and finally I relent and do too as I turn around to face him.

“I am not a brat!” I argue, finding his flushed stubbly cheeks, taking a second to get used to the thick stubble covering them now.

“Ya are, I reckon, couldn’t even wake me up last night t’ finish tha rest o’ tha FRIENDS episode on FaceTime, jus’ kept watchin’ along without me. If that doesn’t make ya a brat, then I dunno what does,” he tuts, clucking his tongue as he shakes his head at me. My giggles grow into a hearty chuckle as his folded hands settle at the small of my back.

“Harry Edward!” I scoff, swatting at his chest once again hidden by his Northface coat, matching his black skinny jeans.

“Hey, ya betta watch that hand o’ yers, bug, and that mouth too.”

“I’m not a brat,” I whine, all facial features falling into a pout that immediately grabs his attention.

“Rebecca Ann, don’t even start with me. Put that bloody pout away befo’ ya regret it,” he insists, pointing his eyes at me with the smallest of smirks peeking through on his lips. It wins him over and soon his dimples accompany his deep laugh. “Stop, yer not a brat, bug, ‘m jus’ teasin’ ya. Y’know that. Jus’ can’t believe it didn’t even take a week fer ya t’ skip ahead o’ me in our show.”

“The episode was already three quarters of the way over!” I protest, earning a good finger wag at me. I fight back and push against his chest. “And I didn’t want to wake you up, you were so tired.”

“No, it was not! It was only half way through and ya couldn’t even wake me up! How rude o’ my Becks t’ be makin’ up excuses.”

“Stop being mean to me,” I pout again, beginning to turn away with my arms crossed over my chest.

“Hey, ‘m jus’ givin' ya a hard time, bug, y’know that. Yer neva a brat, and even if ya are, yer my brat,” Harry hums warmly, the honey returning to his voice in full force as he catches me around the middle with his arms once again. I can’t remember the last time I heard his voice absent of the honey, though. I don’t ever want to. “I wouldn’t want ya any otha way.”

“I knew you were only joking.”

“You li’l liar!” he laughs against my temple and mine joins his ever so contagious one. “Y’know, ‘ve always loved how ya neva take me shit and how ya can dish it right back, Becks.”

“Of course, I figured out at the very beginning that I wouldn’t get by without it.”

“That’s me girl,” he coos, bringing me forth and round to find his gentle green eyes once more. They smile at me with a sparkle to them I haven’t had the pleasure to know before. I’ve yet to see him look at anybody this way, and I wonder if I have my own special look in my eyes for him, too. If I do, it was born long ago.

“What are you doing here? I thought you had said you were going to take it easy until Monday, since your case got done early,” I wonder aloud, unsure of what to do with my hands until they venture to his coat’s zipper on their own, pulling it up and down distractedly.

“I was, until My’ roped me into a partner meetin’ t’day, and I wanted t’ see a special sumbody,” he sighs with an accented roll of his eyes at first, and then they dish out their dazzle on me. “But that’s it, and ‘m off afta that. I hafta do a li’l work fer my case afta finishin’ it, but it’ll only take ten minutes tops. Then laundry, cleanin’, and tha like at home before grocery shoppin’. Only jus’ now got outta bed, tha bloody jetlag.”

“Ah, I see. The work of a lawyer never ends, it seems,” I comment and he nods above me, eyes watching my every move closely. “God, if I knew you’d be here today I would have tried a little harder when I got dressed this morning,” I laugh nervously, my eyes falling to his crimson button-up peeking out from his coat, decorated with gray flowers and foliage.

“Ya don’t even hafta try and ya look gorgeous, Becks. Promise,” Harry disagrees, the molasses pouring out from his words and into my heart, pushing the very last chip away. Just like that, I’m all his again, but I think it happened long before this and I didn’t know. Daring a look up at him, the dimples couldn’t be deeper in his cheeks as his sunshine smile radiates onto me, the pad of his thumb rough against my cheek. “I sure missed seein’ that smile, ‘s me favourite.”

My anxiousness carries away with the sunshine, and I’m left with red cheeks and a smile that makes them hurt. It almost pains me to look into his bright sunny eyes, but I wouldn’t want to be looking anywhere else. Finally, I let myself look and with that, I let him in a little further and start to let go.

“You’re really laying it on thick,” I jest harmlessly with a smile, dragging my finger down the seam of his chest where the two sides of the fabric meet in red cloth buttons.

“Ya, coz I finally can,” he grins, and the warmth spreading across my body in tingly waves finds an outlet in a soft laugh of mine.

Anxious yes, but ever so happy while his hand spreads out flush against my back, fingertips moving lazily. I’ve already pinched myself once or twice today wondering if this is all a dream, and shocked that I could ever be this happy. There were so many times I doubted the existence of it and its possibility, and everything it had to do with having this with Harry. Predictably, an electronic twinkle interrupts our conversation, and I’m confused to find him lifting his wrist.

“Woah, look at the fancy lawyer,” I tease, his already colossal smile growing taller as he flicks a finger across his shiny new Apple watch. “That must have cost a pretty penny.”

“Ya, and My’ dished out e’ry last cent,” he titters, pressing his palm to the shiny surface rounded by space grey edges, returning his eyes and hands to me. “It was his birthday present t’ me, sayin’ that I should be mo’ organized at me age, or sumthin’.”

“Talk about brutal honesty right there.”

“Don’t go bloody agreein’ with him now!” Harry scoffs, but his mouth open in disgust is no more, lined by joyous lips that soon attack my cheeks in kisses.

“No, no, no!” I beg aloud in shrieks when his quick fingers dance along my ribs, sending jolts of electricity across my body. More exclamations and pleas escape them before I say the magic words, “Harry Edward!”

“What d’ya want, hmm, Rebecca Ann?” he asks breathlessly, that adorable breathy laugh falling off of his glossy cherry lips.

“I think you like saying my full name too much,” I contend, giving up and falling into the sage green abyss of his eyes for the hundredth time, or more.

“Maybe I do. Maybe I like it,” he shrugs mischievously, that smirk glued to his lips that pull me in.

“Do you like it, the watch?”

“Ya, ‘s nice. I thought ‘d told ya ‘bout it, sorry. Reckon it has helped me t’ stay organized. Speakin’ of, me meetin’ ‘s inna few, so I hafta take off, bug,” he croons with disapproving lips, his bottom lip soon jutting out from the top.

“Harry Styles, don’t you even!” I threaten rather weakly, the sounds of happiness leaving my lips doing a good job of that.

“Oh, and what if I don’t? Hmmm, Rebecca Holte, jus’ what will ya do ‘bout it?” Harry returns, wiggling an eyebrow at me that makes my chest rumble with harder laughter.

“I’ll just have to stop you, but I don’t know how just yet.”

A devilish smirk is born on his lips before my eyes, and soon leaves my view while his face escapes to the crook of my neck, his voice soon tickling my skin, “Lawyers gotta be quick on their feet, bug. Reckon I can think o’ a way ya can make these lips stop poutin’, maybe ya can try it on me t’morro’ afta our date,” he hums against my neck, knitting up his sentence with a whisper of a kiss below my ear.

I feel like a fricken sixteen-year-old all over again, and I’m loving every second.

“You better get going to your meeting, before you’re late, Harry,” I giggle uncontrollably, sure that my face is blotchy with red all over because of what he just said. My suspicion is confirmed when he lifts his head of moused curls to look me in the eyes again, and the glint in them tells me so. I feel like I can read him even better now, all because he’s letting me.

“‘s alright, they expect me t’ be late by now, ‘s a given,” he insists with a comedic shrug of his shoulders, hands wandering away from my back and to our sides where they invite my hands into his.

“Will you stop and say goodbye this time?”

“‘Course, bug. ‘m sorry I missed ya yestaday, ya had already left afta I had made me rounds,” he assures me, receiving a quiet ‘it’s okay’ from me.

“Try not to fall asleep at your meeting today,” I joke, watching his eyes roll into the back of his head briefly before he scoops me into his arms for a squeeze.

“I won’t if ya promise not t’ be a brat anymo’ and skip ahead in our show.”

“Get lost and go to your meeting already!” I laugh, shoving him away by his chest, observant of his mouth relaxing into a disbelieving ‘O’. His laugh echoes mine quickly, only disrupted when my hand comes to his cheek to plant my lips on his other for a few seconds longer than necessary. “I’m so glad you’re back, Harry.”

“So am I, Becks, so bloody much,” he echoes, holding my hands a little tighter in his, even bringing one to his lips for a kiss. “Good luck on yer case, love, for tha thousandth time. ‘m so proud o’ you.”

With that, he leaves me in a puddle of my own surreal emotions, disappearing from my office with a look over his shoulder wearing that smirk. That very smirk I want so desperately to kiss off those cherry lips already. Tomorrow, I think, if I can make it until then. Just one more day.

I had been struggling with finishing this last part, or rather redoing it, for too long now. When my eyes again strayig to the violet clock, I was surprised to find that it had been almost an hour, and I hadn’t gotten much further. With my head in my hands, I sigh as feelings battle to be felt within my insides. After today’s argument, Myles and I had to shift our approach, and I still wasn’t sure of how to do that. He had been helping me, of course, but I still felt so lost. It doesn’t help that he’s currently caught up in the partner’s meeting that Harry is also at, and Jennings who is but isn’t a partner. I still don’t get it, even though Harry explained it to me a few times. The next time he does, I’ll have to remember to ask him to dumb it down for me.

Even after pouring over our shared notes in Google Docs, and my several law books strewn across my desk, I’m at a loss for what to do.

I wish more than anything that it was already five pm tomorrow, and that the only thing I have to think about is my date with Harry. I still don’t know what the hell to wear, or to do with my hair, or how heavy to go with my makeup.

“Why tha long face, bug?” somebody pipes up, pulling me away from my immersive thoughts. Blinking hard, I tear my eyes away from the laptop screen and look over to the door, but I don’t lift my tired head from my propped fist.

“I don’t know what to do for my argument.”

“Still? Why didn’t ya jus’ ask, Becks?” Harry hums with an inviting smile, pressing the door to come just shy of closing.

I shrug my shoulders with a heavy exhale, scrolling through what I have so far, quickly realizing how embarrassing it’ll be to show him. I can’t exit out quickly enough, hearing his footsteps arrive behind me.

“Hey, what d’ya think yer doin’?” he teases when I switch tabs, quickly feeling the weight of his hand on top of mine, dragging the mouse along. “Don’t be nervous, love, ‘m here t’ help. Always am,” he coos softly, a hand settling on my adjacent shoulder, earning me an encouraging squeeze.

“It’s embarrassing, Harry. I’ve been sitting here for over an hour trying to figure out what to do, and I have next to nothing to show for it.”

“Relax, ‘s only yer first official case yer arguin’. Don’t be so hard on yerself, Becks. It sounds like ya need a break, bug,” he insists, sending sparks along my left arm as he rubs stripes along the skin. It’s not long before I hear a familiar laugh and slowly, Harry’s dancing figure comes into view. “Yo ‘ll tell ya what I want, what I really, really want. So tell me what ya want, what ya really, really want,” he belts out, his phone blasting the song cupped in his hand.

“Oh my God,” I sigh with an accidental laugh, my head falling into my hands. I’m too curious though, and so I peek out from behind my spread fingers to watch him sing passionately with his eyes closed while breaking out some amusing dance moves. “Please, stop,” I chuckle, but I’m sure he also hears the lie in my voice.

“‘m not stoppin’.”

“Please, Harry. You’re going to make me die from secondhand embarrassment,” I confess into my hands, feeling brave and letting my fingers fall down to below my eyes. Mistakenly, his catch mine and they fly back up to cover my eyes, or for the most part.

“Rebecca Ann, ‘m not stoppin’ ‘til ya come and join me.”

“Then you’re going to be there for a while,” I say with a shrug of my shoulders, certain of one thing and that’s the smile claiming my lips, and the forgotten document staring at me. I’m too preoccupied with the silly, dancing man in front of my eyes, and how somehow this makes me love him all the more.

“Becks,” he insists, in between singing along to the song very badly. Oh no, I think as his steps near me once again. Before I know it, I’m staring into darkness as his breath tickles the back of my neck.

“Stop,” I beg with laughs interjected among my pleas. They grow into near shouts and exclamations when his singing is accompanied by his fingers dancing across my sides, and along the slopes of my neck. “Harry!” I almost yell, and when my laughs couldn’t hurt my belly more, it all ceases. Only the singing remains and is joined by his stubbly cheek against my temple, and his arms coiled around my shoulders. “If ya wanna be my lova, ya gotta get with my friends.”

“Make it last forever, friendship never ends,” I continue for him, giggles heard at the end when his nose tickles the corner of my sensitive neck.

“There’s me happy Becks, ‘m glad I found her ‘gain,” Harry coos, leaving a kiss on my temple before he helps me to tackle my argument.

Five days did and didn’t feel very long when I think about it now, with his arms wrapped around me as his voice tickles my ear. Too easily, I can remember his absence over those long days, and how effortlessly they felt far longer. I barely survived with his texts and phone calls alone, and it hurts to think that if it hadn’t been for his case finishing early, I’d still be sitting here in my office all in my lonesome.

Those thoughts are yanked away - thank God - when his voice brings me back, spewing legal mumbo jumbo that luckily nowadays I can understand, but I couldn’t have always said that. Harry makes quick work of what would be my best route to take and how I do that, and for the fiftieth time in the last two days, I couldn’t be more grateful for how easy things are coming together. I couldn’t be more thankful to have him by my side. It still feels like a dream getting to live this life now, and getting to work with him on the daily, singing Spice Girls amidst stolen cheek kisses.

One puzzle piece at a time, and there’s only one or two pieces left in this puzzle of ours.

The murmur of voices assaults my ears when I walk through the door, and feel my vision tugged towards the ceiling decorated with chandeliers. A song by Frank Sinatra floats around the entryway, hardly calming my overactive nerves, despite it being a favorite of my late grandpa’s. When I finally reach the host’s stand, the nerves topple out with my words, jumbling them.

“Reservation for H-Harry Styles, please,” I tell the towering, dark haired man. After a few moments tapping away on the kiosk, he grabs two menus and leads me through a maze of linen covered tables sat under the glow of the several chandeliers.

I try to hide my disappointment when he leads me to an empty, round table, leaving with a few words about my server being with me soon. Another feeling bubbles up inside me, forcing itself to join all of the others mixed together within me. I had a feeling I was too early, I think silently as I shrug off my long pea coat to hang over my chair. Skye’s wishes of good luck and ‘lots of snogging’ float back to me, filling my sad cheeks with another wash of pink. ‘No, you aren’t driving yourself, I’m dropping you off so then you can get a ride home with him, and lay a big one on him when he walks you up,’ she had insisted, but the anxiousness years in the making is doing a good job of making me doubt myself tonight.

My attention drifts to my phone that is silent with no new messages, but I still check our conversation. The last message was from him:

see u in half an hour for our date bug :) xxx

My thumb scrolls through our previous messages, straying to last night’s that brings a smile to my face.

I have no idea what to wear tomorrow :/

meant it when i said u look beautiful in anything Becks ;) help what should i wear ? xx

I might be a little impartial to that gray suit you wore to my class lecture that one time ;)

noted ;) i may especially love the color red on u if u wanna know

Noted ;) Question....

shoot, love

Skye was gonna drop me off tonight on her way to her boyfriend’s …. Would a ride home be too much to ask?

course not Becks. anytime u need a ride im here. id love to give u a ride home. perfect we can jam 2 some spice girls in the car then ;)

I can’t wait

neither can i bug :)

My reminiscing is interrupted when my eyes fall to my outfit of choice, tugging up the scoop neck that Skye insisted wasn’t ‘too slutty.’ Now, I’m not so sure about it, and I can’t decide if I wish he’d show up already, or if I’m not ready. Those thoughts are stolen away when the texts disappear on my phone, his smiling face claiming the screen with a jingle.

“Hello?” I answer with a gulp, trying to hide the anxious tremble in my voice. I can’t help it, my eyes dart to my wrist, noticing it’s already 6:05 pm.

“Hi, bug. ‘m sorry but tha traffic ‘s horrendous and ‘m afraid ‘ll be late gettin’ t’ tha restaurant. E’rybody else ‘s comin’ home from work too,” Harry explains from the other side, a weird sound taking over his voice. Yeah, we’re not too good at this pretending thing anymore, are we? I can hear the nerves in his voice, probably just like he can hear them in mine.

“Oh, it’s okay, Harry. I don’t mind at all, just be careful driving,” I respond, feeling a sense of relief at knowing where he is. I know he never would, but it squashes the tiny voice inside of me saying he wasn’t ever going to show up.

“‘Course I will, love. Thanks fer understandin’. Reckon ‘ll be there in ten. Are ya there already?” he responds, just the sound of his voice doing wonders at calming me down. The only thing that could take it all away is a hug, one of his.

“Yeah, I just sat down.”

“Mmmm, d’ya mind scopin’ out tha menu while yer there? I won’t be too long, we can order once I get there, if that’s alright,” he asks, the sound of traffic sneaking into our phone call for a second. Then, I hear him sigh ‘finally’ and the subsequent thrum of the motor.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll see you soon then, careful driving.”

“I can’t wait t’ see you, Becks,” he hums before hanging up, leaving me sitting across from an empty chair that I can’t stop picturing him sitting in.

This is really happening.

Finally.

The sound of her voice rings in my ears, and does nothing to stop the anxious shakes coursing throughout my body. Curses fall under my breath as I honk at somebody who pulls out right in front of me, making me slam on my brakes. With a sigh, I turn on my indicator before making my turn.

Pulling my keys from the ignition drenches my surroundings in silence, and reminds me of my heart beating wildly within my chest. Looking up, the decorative windows of the restaurant appear before me in shrouded light. She’s somewhere in there . . waiting for me.

Get it together, Harry. You can do this.

My eyes drift to the rear view mirror and I card my fingers through my hair until it looks decent enough. That’s as good as it’s going to get, I almost mutter while smoothing down my blazer underneath my coat. The bone chilling February night nips at my face once my feet touch the tarmac. Streetlights cast glows all around me, as well as the headlights of several cars. The thumping within my chest grows louder and faster as my feet near the door, and then the stand where a manicured man waits.

“Hi. I made a reservation unda the name ‘Harry Styles’,” I tell him, immediately casting my eyes to the tables within view, searching for her dark chocolate locks.

“Right this way,” he replies, waving a hand to follow him and I do. He leads me past several tables, empty and occupied, and almost gets me lost in the process.

The last thing I feel is lost when my eyes finally find her.

“Thank you. I-I got it from here,” I tell him hurriedly, holding a hand out that brings us both to a halt. He walks away after a short ‘you’re welcome,’ leaving me there, right where I want to be.

I don’t remember the smile reaching my ears or my heart quieting within my chest as I watch her flip through the menu thirty feet away from me. The prettiest red dress dons her long body, falling just underneath her collarbones and draped over the curve of her shoulders. Her hair falls in dark, natural waves, almost hiding the round opal sitting above the scoop of scarlet fabric. A tingling sensation blankets my body from head to toe, and the image of Becks sitting there waiting for me is burned into my mind.

It feels like I’m meeting her again for the first time, but I’m not. This feels like a new first time, and I know it’s one I won’t ever forget, much like the very first time I laid my eyes upon her.

It felt like a Monday. For the bloody life of me, I couldn’t remember if it was one at the moment. Is it Monday? I’m not sure, but with the way things were going today, it sure felt like one. The copier had a jam, I forgot the first lunch I’ve made in years at home, and my girlfriend had been annoying the fuck out of me this morning. To top it all off, I had applicants being interviewed today to fill the position of my personal assistant, ever since the last one bolted. She didn’t last more than two weeks, a big surprise.

Pete had been blowing up my phone for the last ten minutes, and I finally had had enough. Without an announcement or a knock, I stride into his office, fully intent on finding out what the hell he wants.

“I’m a little busy, if you haven’t noticed,” he retorts over the head of dark chestnut locks sat in front of him. Presumably, one of the new applicants for my personal assistant. Hmm.

“Well, ya kept ringin’ me bloody phone, Pete. So, what tha hell d’ya want?” I insist, throwing up a hand that falls to my thigh with a loud slap.

Suddenly, I wish the quiet little thing would turn around, and give me a look at her. Shy, she is, it seems. There she sits, tucked away into her little shell, dressed to impress in a dark dress.

“I’m in the middle of an interview!” he exclaims, certainly making a good first impression with the applicant. It makes me wonder for the tenth time why I bother having him do the interviews, but then I remember that I don’t really give a fuck, as long as I don’t have to do them.

“What fer, huh?” I tease, instantly getting a snappy response from Pete about it being for me, as if I didn’t already know. But, I did, and am only doing this to bother him even more.

“Ooo, ‘s it now? Ya get me a good one? Huh, Pete?” I grin, taking a step forward as a hand in my pocket plays with the tiny, metal guitar attached to my key ring. Sticking my head out as I move forward, my eyes dance across her head, and her profile that soon comes into view. “Hullo, love. Gonna be me new one, are ya? Petey here says I can’t keep one fer tha life o’ me, so here he ‘s interviewin’ me anotha one. How’s she doin’ so far, Petey? Think she’s a winna?” I joke aloud, knowing full well the effect my words have on the both of them.

My subsequent introduction falls from my lips after a retort from Pete, and then the stranger finally turns to look me in the eyes. I rack my brain, trying to put a name to her face from a prior conversation with Pete. Or was it going over her resume when it came in the other day? I can’t remember which, and I blame it on her captivating baby blue eyes, as well as the intoxicating smile that greets my own. Words float from her lips and grace my ears for the very first time, and I knew immediately that she was something else.

“Hi, my name is Becky. Becky Holte.”

Little did I know how drastically she would change my life, sometimes I thought for the worse, but ultimately for the better. The better, always. I had no way of knowing at that very moment, how many times she would come to save me.

My Becks.

The sound of homemade ravioli filled with chicken and three kinds of cheese is almost making my mouth water. It also makes me wonder when Harry will finally be here, and habitually, my eyes lift to look for him. To my surprise, I find him standing a ways away with the sweetest smile stuck to his lips.

“Hiya, Becks. Sorry ‘m late. Ya look . . absolutely gorgeous, by tha way,” he comments once he’s within a few steps of the table. He reaches across to squeeze my arm before sitting down across from me, a blush pinching his cheeks.

“Thank you, Harry. I uh, like the suit you went with, you look very handsome in it. Good choice,” I return, failing to not focus on the fast thrumming deep inside of me.

“Ya, a certain sumbody said it was their favourite on me, so I couldn’t disappoint,” he grins with a shrug, unfastening the button at his waist, exposing the satiny black button-up hidden underneath.

“Good, I’m glad you didn’t,” I smile, sure of the warmth he can see filling my cheeks, because I can see it mirrored in his own. “I like that you kept the stubble.”

“Why thank you,” he comments, once again rubbing it with his thumb and forefinger, and like before, making me all the more jealous. “I trimmed it up a li’l bit, figured I betta.”

“Oh, I hope you keep it. I think I prefer you with it.”

“D’ya now, Becks?” he teases with a lift of his eyebrows, his tousled curls almost tickling his forehead, but just barely. “‘ll hafta rememba that,” he smiles, and more than ever, it’s incredibly contagious. My cheeks are starting to hurt from smiling by now, but I don’t even mind.

“The um,” I begin nervously, my eyes falling to the elegant paper menu opened in front of me. It pains me to look away from him and the sunshine emanating from his smile, but it’s not so bad when I feel his chelsea boot knock against my heel, remaining there against the back of my ankle. “Chicken ravioli sounds good, as well as the margherita pizza, and Cacio e Pepe. Lots of good choices for dessert, too.”

“Mmm, they all sound good, love. Thanks fer lookin’ fer us,” he muses aloud, head bent down to peer at the menu when I glance over to him.

His habit returns and his bottom lip is caught between his teeth, and somehow, it makes my smile grow bigger. I didn’t think that was possible, but here I am with aching cheeks. I nudge his foot with mine and he looks up with a question on his face, soon relaxing into a sparkling smile. That effervescent look in his eyes from the other day returns, and if I hadn’t known it already, I truly could look into his eyes for the rest of eternity. The dimples haven’t left his cheeks since he arrived, and his raspberry lips beg at me from across the table.

“Let’s give it a try then,” he remarks, closing his menu without breaking our eye contact. The words dipped in honey flow from his lips and tickle something inside me, and I want more than anything to hear another meaning in them. His foot nudging at mine in return only makes me give in to it, and so does his wink.

Our server arrives at our table shortly, and I thank God for the champagne she pours into tall flutes, not taking the edge off fast enough. A conversation blossoms between us about his case, and then mine with Myles.

“Ya did great by tha way. Congrats on tha win, Becks, ‘m so fookin’ proud o’ you,” Harry grins adamantly, sweetness pouring off of his words that come out with a shake of his head.

“Thank you so much, Harry. Wait, how’d you know we won it? I was just going to tell you,” I ask with furrowed brows, and receive a measly shrug of his shoulders in return. The look on his face, as if a revelation is threatening to burst from his lips, teases at me until it abates when the server brings us waters and we order.

“So so bloody proud o’ you t’day, Becks,” he whispers as she pulls out her notepad and a pen. Possibilities blossom within my mind after he sends me a coy wink and knocks his foot against mine again. It doesn’t leave my own throughout the rest of our time there, during our meal and the laughs we share over glasses of champagne, and a plate of Tiramisu that I somehow let him share with me.

“I knew it! You were there today, sitting in the gallery, weren’t you?!” I exclaim, mumbling a short ‘thank you’ when he opens the car door for me.

“Maybe,” Harry shrugs casually, walking around the front of the car as I fall onto the leather seat.

“Harry Styles!” I nearly shout, if it weren’t for my voice dissolving into a giggle as he slides behind the steering wheel next to me.

“What? I had some stuff t’ do at tha courts, so I may have popped in fer a mo’,” he explains.

“Sure,” is all I say as I pull the seat belt across my chest.

“Hush, and play some music, bug. Here,” he insists, handing me his grey iPhone that looks normal sized in his hand, and then gigantic in mine.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming to watch?”

“Coz o’ that right there, Becks. Yer nervous ‘bout it right now afta tha fact, imagine how ya woulda been if ‘d told ya I was comin’ befo’ yer argument t’day,” he returns, pressing buttons on the dash and soon, waves of hot air greet my cold body.

“I guess you’re right.”

“‘m what? I didn’t catch that,” Harry jests, cupping his ear. A scoff flies from my lips and I playfully swat his shoulder. “Hey, watch it. ‘m drivin’.”

“You haven’t even switched gears, so shut up,” I laugh, catching the eye roll he thinks I don’t see. “I see that eye roll, Styles, you better watch it.”

“You betta watch it, Becks. Betta pick a good Spice Girls song too, ‘m payin’ attention,” he jokes, soon his fingers diving into my side. A laugh escapes me unwillingly, and yanks my eyes over to his giggling lips.

His name leaves mine in a near shriek, and after a blink, his tickling fingers are gone and lacing between mine. The dark flecks in his sage green eyes catch under the overhead light before it turns off automatically. He gives my hand a good squeeze as his eyes melt into mine, and a zing of electricity runs up my fingers and then my arm. The smile falling into his cheeks mirrors the one that’s been glued to my lips all night, and now grows higher and higher. I return the squeeze just as he looks to his mirrors, the click of the doors locking when he shifts to Reverse.

It almost hurts to look away, but so many other feelings and thoughts are occupying me as my eyes fall to his phone. Disbelief washes over me as his long, ringed fingers sit between mine. It only grows when he lifts our intertwined hands up and over the middle console, to sit on his warm thigh.

An uninvited wave of pain hits me when I spot familiar sad songs amongst his music library, like the familiar ‘When She Loved Me’ that could make any Toy Story fan weep within seconds of hearing it. It intensifies when my eyes run over the songs Before You Go, Wish You Were Here, Say You Won’t Let Go, and With or Without You. Chancing a glance over at him, he stares straight ahead into the dark night, and a bittersweetness greets me. I try not to let it in, and the realization that perhaps those lost seven months were hell for him too, as were those five days apart.

“Find it? I have Spice World on there sumwhere. I know I have loads o’ shit on there, sorry,” he comments, turning his head to check his left before pulling onto the busy road.

“Y-Yeah,” I stutter, looking back to his expansive music library spanning from the 50’s to current music. His thumb drawing circles onto my knuckles brushes some of the sadness away as I bring up the album he speaks of.

“Bloody hell, why ya choosin’ tha sad one, Becks?” he titters, glancing over to me when we come to a stop at a light. His smile shining back at me whisks away the last drops of the sadness, but hints of it remain with me, begging to be felt. I shrug my shoulders as the beginning lyrics of ‘Too Much’ fills the car, and I only turn it up louder. “I get t’ pick tha next song, if yer playin’ sad stuff. Bloody rubbish you are at pickin’ songs,” he sighs jokingly with a shake of his head, curls tickling his ears and the nape of his neck.

“I am not!”

“‘Kay, brat, keep talkin’,” he snickers, earning another scoff from me that he answers with a harder laugh. I cast my eyes to the window with an exaggerated whimper, soon hearing his profuse apologies. “‘m kiddin’, Becks, bloody hell. I already know ya have a good taste in music from all o’ our talks. I like this song too, jus’ thought ya’d go fer some happy songs, seein’ tha . . occasion and e’rythin’. Hey.”

I answer him with my eyes returning to him, finding his wink before he looks back to traffic, and with my thumb coasting back and forth across his smooth skin. I listen to the lyrics, feeling another squeeze of my hand from him before I change the song.

“Hey, don’t change it befo’ ‘s done!” he exclaims, and I just laugh, watching his shocked lips soon do the same.

“Then stop complaining,” I argue, catching another roll of his eyes as the car slows to a stop in front of another light. Joy buds on my lips as the surprise unfolds on his features, meanwhile his eyes crinkle, the dimples fall deeper, and his raspberry lips thin out as a smile consumes his face.

“I knew ya were sumthin’ special,” he notes aloud with a shake of his head, a giggle emanating from his joyous smile, right before he joins me to sing along to Shania Twain’s ‘Man, I Feel Like A Woman.’

His fingers laced between mine continue to send my heart into overdrive as we belt out the song between contagious laughs, and then another crowd favourite, ‘You’re Still The One.’ This one gets me and sometimes throughout the song, I can’t get myself to look at him with the sincerity held in the lyrics. As well as the words that hit too close to home.

Finally, I can’t stand it anymore, and my eyes drift over to his at the end of the song, finding that his are already on mine. “‘m so glad we made it. Look how far we’ve come, my baby,” Harry finishes with his eyes dancing upon me with that smile dripping with molasses. As if his hand squeezing mine periodically throughout the song wasn’t already making me want to cry, now I really could. I return the gesture before looking out the window, blinking back the arriving tears from my eyes as those lasting words sing inside of my head.

Yeah, we finally made it, Harry. Belatedly, but finally.

“‘s been years since ‘ve been here, hasn’t changed much tho’,” Harry remarks softly, only a few steps away from my door.

“Yeah, the inside looks bout the same too.”

“‘m sure. Maybe I could see fer meself one o’ these days,” he remarks aloud, and when my eyes drag over to his nervously, I answer him with a nod.

“I’d like that.”

“Me too,” he coos, rubbing the pad of his thumb along the back of my hand. A shy smile nudges at the edge of my lips as he stands in front of me, my right hand still safe within his. “Well, I had a wondaful time t’night, thanks again.”

“You’re welcome, and thank you too. I had a lot of fun . . with you.”

“So did I, bug. ‘ll um, text you later then?” Harry says, clearing his throat awkwardly, his bottom lip soon returning to its nervous spot.

“Y-yeah, sounds good,” I mumble quietly, eyes falling to my hand that he drops. The absence of his warmth against mine feels very strange now, having been holding hands for the entire drive and subsequent walk up to my apartment.

“Night, Becks.”

“Goodnight, Harry, careful driving,” is the last thing I say before slipping behind my door, finding Skye perched on the sofa. The monotonous, forced words echo in my ears and my eyes fall to the floor, disappointment flooding every inch of me.

“So, how’d it go?! Did you finally fucking kiss him?!” she shouts the second the door meets its frame.

“No,” I admit between shy lips, the steps I take seeming as if they’re from somebody else’s body, not mine. The entire last five minutes feels like somebody else had lived them, not me. No, it can’t end like that. “Not yet, anyways,” I rush, ignoring my shoes I already toed off, spinning around and ripping open the door. “Harry, wait!” I exclaim, finding his surprised expression waiting in front of the lift.

“What?” he asks, eyebrows bent into a questioning mess.

“I-I forgot something,” I manage, the words spilling out in a heap while he closes the distance between us, stopping right in front of me. Right where I need him.

“Forgot what, bug? Did ya forget yer shoes in me car?” he titters, the fluorescent glow overhead picking out the few blonde hairs in his stubble.

“No . . something else,” I finally admit, taking a step when there aren’t any left.

The dimples remain set into his cheeks while his eyes fall to my lips and mine raise to his. His facial hair is prickly and dense under the pad of my thumb, and his coveted bottom lip is warm and pillowy. The golden hue of his olive green irises fills my mind when my lips finally meet his, and at last, I find his bottom lip between my own. His sweet giggle sounds against my lips as my fingers get lost in his buttery curls. I come to echo it when his hands shock me with their coldness against my hips, pulling me closer to him. One strays to the back of my head as his lips move against mine, the word ‘finally’ repeating incessantly within my mind. His barely there beard is scratchy against my skin, contrasting to the smooth tip of his nose grazing my cheek. The cinnamon and cocoa powder from the Tiramisu cake tickles my taste buds while his spicy vanilla smell covers me like a blanket. Zings shoot across my palm pressed to his smiling cheek, his facial hair prickly against the sensitive skin.

Not feeling like what was actually mere seconds later, air fills my lungs when we pull away at the same time, sharp inhales filling the air. Quickly, his sweet giggle joins it, and ropes one of my own in. The tip of his nose leaves trails on my cheek as his forehead falls onto mine.

“Ya have no idea how long ‘ve waited fer that,” Harry rasps, his warm breath dancing across my lips. His own press a whisper of a kiss to mine briefly, although after that, now I’m sure it could never be long enough.

“I think I do know,” I mumble, my hand straying to his chin where I brush the tip of my thumb against the flesh of his bottom lip.

“‘m sorry it took us so long, bug.”

“It’s okay, we’re here now. Finally,” I tell him and he nods, the twinkle in his eye bright as can be. For the first time, I let myself melt and lose myself in the greens of his eyes. Something I have wanted to do ever since the very first time I looked into his green eyes and knew I was fucked.

“Yes, we are. And look at you, Becks. Ya beat me t' tha first date and tha first kiss,” he smirks with a decadent laugh adorning his words. I can’t help but join him while I twirl a ringlet of his hair around the tip of my finger against the back of his neck.

“Oh, it’s okay, Harry. You got the first hand hold, and the first Shania Twain car duet.”

A roll of his miraculous eyes accompanies his continuing laugh, “Ya, well, so did you, but I got tha more romantic one,” he insists, words welcomed by my surprised scoff.

“Wait, you don’t find ‘Man, I Feel Like A Woman’ romantic?!” I nearly exclaim in faux disbelief, my voice softening into a giggle quickly.

“Only when you sing it, bug,” Harry smiles, thumbing circles into the small of my back.

“Wait, you got tha first handhold, brat. Rememba, when I visited you at yer old work that day? Bloody hell, you beat me t’ all tha good ones, Becks. No fair,” he snickers with a sigh to his words, the two contrasting the other. I suffice my response with an obligatory nod, feeling my heart just now starting to settle into a regular beat. “Becks, there’s so many things ‘ve wanted t’ say t’ you, and now, I finally can.”

“I think I know how you feel.”

“First thing ‘ll say ‘s I get tha second date and tha second kiss,” Harry contends with a smirk held in his eyes.

“Oh, really?” I giggle and he soon nods. He quiets the laugh beginning on my lips with his own giddy ones, my lips molding against his effortlessly. Thoughts blossom quickly within my mind, including why I waited so fucking long to kiss him. If I’d known all of these years how wonderful it feels to kiss him, I never would have waited this long. Our kisses are slow although hurried, our lips searching for the other’s desperately, and somehow perfectly. Years overdue, and it couldn’t feel any more perfect.

“Fookin’ hell, I jus’ wanna keep kissin’ you, Becks. Dunno if I can stop,” he chuckles, brushing his nose against mine softly. Shockingly, his eyes are even more gorgeous from this view, and I didn’t think that was possible. Evidently, anything is.

“You don’t have to,” I laugh and he shrugs his shoulders while his eyebrows mimic the expression, his giggle soon vibrating against my tingling lips.

“We have loads o’ lost time t’ make up fer,” he notes aloud.

“Yes, we do. A couple years, give or take.”

“Mmmhmm, yer right there, li’l one. Fook, there were so many times I wanted t’ kiss ya ova the years,” he sighs with a sad shake of his head. His dimple is soft under my fingertip, hidden under the warm brunette facial hair.

“Then kiss me.”

Too soon, his lips leave mine after a short peck, but I press at the back of his curls and envelope his laugh with my lips. My name falls from him in a delighted whisper before one more kiss. Our laughs grow louder only to be muffled, although weakly, when a figure walks by into their nearby apartment. My face runs to the crook of his neck, my very favorite song dancing along my ears as he holds me against him.

“Nothing to see here, sir,” I joke, and the warmth filling my insides grows at the sound of his happiness.

“No, I rememba I got tha first handhold that night we went out fer drinks tha first time. Tha night with tha Purple Hazes and all those shots,” Harry insists from above me, and I give him the funniest look when I come out of hiding.

“You’re still going on about that?” I ask in near disbelief, watching his curls move when he nods his head, dipping to meet my lips with his for a slow kiss.

“I don’t want this night to end,” I hum against the strawberry color of his decadent mouth.

“Neither do I, Becks. ‘ve been waitin’ fer it fer so long,” he agrees, the wispiness of his eyelashes ghostlike against my forehead.

“It’s getting late, and Skye is probably dying to hear how tonight went.”

“Ya betta go and tell tha poor girl then,” he responds, pulling my eyes towards his that sit just a moment away, sending all of the sunshine in my direction.

“That’s okay?”

“‘Course. I may or may not ring Myles on tha way home t’ tell him all ‘bout it,” he shrugs with a telling lilt to his sing-song voice. The only sound that leaves my lips is an amused laugh that he echoes, and I know that he feels the same way.

At last, I know after over two years that he feels the same way, through and through.

“We’ll figure out sumthin’ fer this weekend t’getha, sound good?”

“Yeah, sounds great, Harry,” I agree slowly and he nods ever so slightly, leaving kisses starting from my temple and down my cheek.

“G’night, bug.”

“Night, Harry. Drive careful,” I tell him and once again, he answers me with a nod.

“I promise, babe.”

“Goodnight,” I almost whisper, the very last breath of the word stolen away by his lips. I wouldn’t want it any other way, I barely am able to think as his lips massage mine between his. His neck is fiery beneath my palms and I’m sure mine is likened to it underneath his fingertips, surges of electricity passing below my skin. The skin is balmy against my blushing cheek when my arms come around his middle, surprising us both with a long hug, before I pull away first.

“Night, my Becks,” he murmurs against my lips, a shiver running down my spine when he leaves with a final squeeze to my hand. If that didn’t do it, the song flowing from his humming lips sparks memories behind my eyes, but I still can’t figure out where it’s from. But, I know that I have plenty of time to figure it out, and to get all of the kisses that I want from him.

Fucking finally.

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reallifesultanas · 5 years ago

Text

Portrait of Gülfem Hatun / Gülfem Hatun portréja

Gülfem is one of the most contraordinary person in the whole reign of Sülyeman I. There are a lot of legend around her and we know very few on her directly. In this post I would like to collect all what we know. Most of the informations are thank to Leslie Peirce (again). I also put my ideas into the post, what I think about her, what seems logical about her.

Origin

Based on what we know about her, she may have been born between 1490 and 1500 and was perhaps Greek. Her origin is questionable, but most sources agree that she was most likely of Greek or Balkan origin. According to the best-known legend (actually there is no evidence for this) Gülfem was Süleyman's concubine in Manisa, but their child died. Gülfem then asked for it or was invented by Süleyman, but Gülfem became one of the leading servants of the harem. Perhaps this gave new meaning to her life after the death of her child. But there are other options also, which are maybe even more logical! I will address these at the end of the post, summarizing the more likely ones based on what I have known so far.

During the reign of Süleyman I

Gülfem was not listed in Süleyaman's Manisa harem register as a concubine, so she was probably never a harem concubine, but steward of the harem.

Hürrem often mentions Gülfem in her letters, always saying good things about her. Gülfem seems to have been a kind of supporter of Hürrem (c. 1503-1558) from the beginning. This fact makes it probable that she was a senior harem servant rather than a former concubine of Süleyman (r. 1520-1566). After all, the jealous Hürrem certainly would not have befriended Süleyman's former lover. The relationship between the two women was so good that when Süleyman was away from Istanbul, in her letters Hürrem always listed Gülfem as the person sending greetings besides herself and her children. This intimate relationship makes it clear that Hürrem regarded Gülfem as a kind of sister who may have guided her in the early days and helped her to navigate in the harem, possibly even giving her tips about Süleyman. Gülfem knew Süleyman very well so it would make sense to help Hürrem how to seduce him. In fact, perhaps it was Gülfem herself who introduced Hürrem to Ayşe Hafsa (c. 1475-1534) or even Süleyman!

In addition to Hürrem, Gülfem was also very close to Süleyman and they were in a friendly term. Their correspondence is not official, but very simple, loose-spoken, not formal at all. It is clear from the letters that when Süleyman went on a campaign, he entrusted Hürrem to Gülfem. In addition to paying general attention and helping Hürrem, Süleyman also asked Gülfem to secretly monitor and report on Hürrem's spending. Presumably, Hürrem had trouble scheduling her money in the early period of her reign, so Süleyman asked Gülfem for help. In one of her letter, Gülfem openly expressed to the Sultan how uncomfortable this double game was for her and asked him not to cover her up in front of Hürrem ever. In any case, Hürrem must have known or suspected of the unity of the two. According to Gülfem's account, in vain did she ask, Hürrem did not confess about her financial situation to her, and so she had to obtain information from a eunuch. From this Gülfem learned that Hürrem had little money left of what Süleyman had left for her before he left for the campaign. However, it is not Hürrem's financial situation that is particularly relevant here, but the language of Gülfem's letter about it. It is so direct that it makes it absolutely clear that Gülfem was very close to Süleyman and thus also had an entrance into the family. Gülfem, for example, once recounts in another letter to Süleyman that she mistakenly thought that the perfume she had received from Süleyman as a gift, was a liquer (alcoholic beverage) and she drank it. She writes, “I drank the cologne right away, you should have seen tha state I was in. There were guests, I have no idea what I said, I dozed the whole long day... You made a complete buffoon out of me! God-willing, when we see each other again, we can talk about it.” This kind of language and theme suits two good friends rather than the dialogue of a former consort and her master.

Who could Gülfem be then?

Overall, I don’t think Gülfem was ever Süleyman’s concubine. After all, if she had been bedded, she would have been on every list like "mother of XY", even if her child had already passed away! Hürrem was also listed as “Mother of Prince Mehmed” and after Mehmed’s death as “Mother of Prince Selim”. The concubines whose only child died were listed as “the mother of the late XY”. So the names of the concubines and mothers were not recorded in these lists. Gülfem, on the other hand, appeared under her own name. Moreover, the fact that Hürrem never showed jealousy towards Gülfem does not make it likely that there was ever anything sexual between Gülfem and Süleyman.

But then who could she be? I think she was either a simple slave who, as a child, was a companion to one of Süleyman's sisters, so Süleyman could know her well. She may have been a personal servant of Ayşe Hafsa, so she spent a lot of time with Süleyman, who may have regarded her as a governess or sister as well. But it could also be that she was a simple harem servant who was close to Süleyman for some reason. Maybe Süleyman's sisters could have been a milk sister to her, and she stayed in the harem for some reason? There are a lot of possibilities before us and since there are no specifics, everyone can think of what is the most sympathic version for them. In any case, whoever she was, she must have been a very influential person, as she was one (if not the only) close female friend of Süleyman and Hürrem.

Her death

Just as described in the previous paragraph, I do not consider it probable that the legends about Gülfem’s death are true. Legend has it that Gülfem wanted to build a mosque, but she had no money for it, so when the sultan invited her to his bed, Gülfem sold the right of the night to a young concubine to raise money. Süleyman became so furious at this that he executed Gülfem. The story is problematic at several points. The woman who speaks as openly to the Sultan, as previous letters have shown, the woman who was the sultan’s friend, sister, would have asked for money openly if she had needed it. And anyway, where would a simple concubine have had enough money to help Gülfem? According to a 1552 register, Gülfem received 150 aspers per day as stipend, while ordinary harem concubines received 6 aspers. This list is also important because it indicates that Gülfem was alive in 1552. Nevertheless, the Mosque of Gülfem was very much completed in Üsküdar and, according to local legends, she created it specifically for women, men could only enter occasionally.

So while we don’t know anything specific about her death, in my opinion, this legend can by no means be true.

Gülfem probably died of natural causes in her old age, presumably in 1562. She was buried in her own mosque in the tomb she had already prepared for herself.

* * *

Gülfem az egyik legellentmondásosabb alak Szulejmán uralkodásának időszakából. Nagyon sok legenda kering róla, azonban nagyon kevés egyértelmű információnk van. Ebben a posztban összegyűjtöttem mindent, amit jelenleg tudunk róla. A legtöbb információt ismételten Leslie Peirce-nek köszönhetjük. Saját véleményemet és kvöetkeztetéseimet is beletettem a posztba.

Eredete

Azok alapján, amit tudunk róla, 1490 és 1500 között születhetett és talán görög volt. Eredete kérdéses, legtöbb forrás azonban abban egyetért, hogy legvalószínűbb a görög vagy balkáni származás. A legismertebb monda szerint (bizonyíték erre nincs) Gülfem Szulejmán ágyasa volt Manisában, ám gyermekük meghalt. Ezekután Gülfem kérte, vagy Szulejmán találta ki, de Gülfemből a hárem egyik vezető szolgája lett. Talán ez adott új értelmet életének gyermeke halála után. Ám más lehetőségek is vannak! Ezekre a poszt végén fogok kitérni, összegezve az addig tudottak alapján a levalószínűbbeket.

I. Szulejmán uralkodása alatt

Gülfem nem szerepelt Szulejmán Manisai háremének névjegyzékében a háremhölgyek között, így valószínűleg nem volt sosem háremhölgy, hanem a hárem igazgatását végezte.

Hürrem leveleiben gyakran említi Gülfemet, mindig csupa jókat mond róla. Olybá tűnik, hogy Gülfem egyfajta támogtója volt a kezdetektől Hürremnek (c. 1503-1558). Ez a tény valószínűsíti, hogy inkább magasbeosztású háremszolgáló volt, mintsem korábbi ágyas. Hiszen a féltékeny természetű Hürrem egészen biztosan nem barátkozott volna Szulejmán (u. 1520-1566) korábbi szeretőjével. A két nő viszonya olyan jó volt, hogy amikor Szulejmán távol volt Isztambultól, leveleiben Hürrem mindig felsorolta Gülfemet is a levél végén, mint üdvözletét küldő személyt önmaga és gyermekei mellett. Ez a bensőséges viszony egyértleművé teszi, hogy Hürrem egyfajta nővérként tekintett Gülfemre, aki lehetséges, hogy a korai időszakban irányította Hürremet, és segítette, hogyan navigáljon a háremben, a politikában esetleg még Szulejmánnal kapcsolatban is adott neki tippeket. Sőt talán maga Gülfem volt az, aki Hürremet bemutatta Ayşe Hafsának (c. 1475-1534) vagy egyenesen Szulejmánnak!

Hürrem mellett Gülfem igen közeli, baráti viszonyban volt Szulejmánnal is. Levelezéseik nem hivatalosak, hanem igen egyszerű, laza nyelvezetűek, egyáltalán nem formálisak. A levelekből kirajzolódik, hogy mikor Szulejmán hadjáratra indult, Gülfemre bízta Hürremet. Az általános odafigyelés és Hürrem segítése mellett Szulejmán arra is megkérte Gülfemet, hogy titokban figyelje és jelentse Hürrem költekezéseit. Feltehetőleg Hürremnek a korai időszakban gondja volt a pénz beosztásával ezért kérhette Szulejmán Gülfem segítségét. Gülfem egyik levelében kifejezte nyíltan a szultánnak, hogy milyen kellemetlen számára ez a kettősjáték és kérve kérte, hogy ne leplezze őt le Hürrem előtt. Mindenesetre Hürrem bizonyára tudott egyeségükről vagy sejtette azt. Gülfem beszámolója szerint ugyanis hiába kérdezte, Hürrem nem vallotta be neki az anyagi helyzetét, és így egy eunuchtól kellett információt szereznie. Innen tudta meg Gülfem, hogy Hürremnek már alig maradt pénze abból, amit Szulejmán a hadjáratra indulása előtt hagyott neki. Azonban itt nem Hürrem anyagi helyzete a különösen lényeges, hanem a levél nyelvezete. Annyira közvetlen, hogy teljesen egyértelművé teszi, hogy Gülfem nagyon közel állt Szulejmánhoz és bejáratos volt ezáltal a családba is. Gülfem például egyszer egy másik levelében elmeséli, hogy tévesen likőrnek vélt egy parfümöt, melyet Szulejmántól kapott és megitta azt. Azt írja: „Látnod kellett volna, milyen állapotban voltam. Vendégek voltak a háremben én pedig arra sem emlékszem, hogy mit mondtam, egész nap szundikáltam… Teljesen bolondot csináltál belőlem! Isten segedelmével, amikor újra találkozunk, megvitathatjuk ezt az esetet.” Ez a fajta nyelvezet és téma inkább illik két jó barátra, mint egy korábbi ágyas és ura párbeszédére.

Akkor ki is lehetett Gülfem?

Összességében nem hiszem, hogy Gülfem Szulejmán ágyasa lett volna valaha is. Hiszen, ha ágyas lett volna minden jegyzékben úgy szerepelt volna, mint XY anyja, még akkor is, ha gyermeke már előtte elhunyt volna! Hürrem is a jegyzékekben, mint „Mehmed herceg anyja” szerepelt, Mehmed halála után pedig „Szelim herceg anyja” néven. Azon ágyasok, akiknek egyetlen gyermeke elhunyt, azok pedig úgy szerepeltek a jegyzékben, mint „a néhai XY édesanyja”. Tehát az ágyasok és anyák nevei nem kerültek lejegyzésre ezen jegyzékekben. Ellenben Gülfem saját néven szerepelt. Mindemellett a tény, hogy Hürrem sosem mutatott féltékenységet Gülfem irányába nem valószínűsíti, hogy valaha is lett volna Gülfem és Szulejmán között bármi.

Na de akkor ki lehetett? Szerintem vagy egyszerű rabszolga volt, aki gyermekként Szulejmán valamelyik nővérének volt társa, így Szulejmán is jól ismerhette. Esetleg Ayşe Hafsa személyes szolgálója volt, így sokat időzött Szulejmánnal, aki talán nővérként tekintett rá is. De az is lehet, hogy egyszerű háremszolga volt, aki valamiért közel állt Szulejmánhoz. Esetleg Szulejmán nővéreinek lehetett tejtestvére, aki valamiért a háremben maradt? Nagyon sok lehetőség áll előttünk és mivel nincsenek konkrétumok, mindenki azt gondolhatja róla, ami neki a legszimpatikusabb verzió. Mindenesetre akárki is volt, bizonyára igen befolyásos személy lehetett, hiszen Szulejmán és Hürrem egyik (ha nem egyetlen) közeli barátja volt, aki bejáratos volt a palotába.

Halála

Éppen az előző bekezdésben ismertetettek alapján nem tartom valószínűnek, hogy a legendák Gülfem haláláról igazak lennének. A legenda szerint Gülfem mecsetet akart építeni, ám erre nem volt pénze, így amikor a szultán magához hívta héjszakára, Gülfem eladta az éjszaka jogát egy fiatal ágyasnak, hogy pénzt szerezzen. Szulejmán ezen úgy bedühödött, hogy meggyilkoltatta Gülfemet. A történet több ponton sántít. Az a nő, aki olyan nyíltan beszél a szultánnal, ahogy a korábbi levelek mutatták, aki a szultán barátja, nővére volt, nyíltan mert volna kérni pénzt, ha arra lett volna szüksége. És egyébként is honnan lett volna egy egyszerű ágyasnak annyi pénze, hogy azzal segíteni tudja Gülfemet? Egy 1552-es jegyzék szerint Gülfem 150 aspert kapott naponta fizetés gyanánt, míg az egyszerű háremhölgyek 6 aspert. Ez a jegyzék azért is fontos, mert jelzi, hogy Gülfem életben volt 1552-ben. Mindazonáltal Gülfem mecsete nagyon is elkészült Üsküdarban és a helyi legendák szerint kifejezetten nőknek hozta azt létre, férfiak csak alkalmanként mehettek be. Így bár haláláról nem tudunk semmi konkrétumot, véleményem szerint ez a legenda semmiképpen sem lehet igaz.

Gülfem valószínűleg természetes okokból hunyt el idős korában, feltehetőleg 1562-ben. Saját mecsetjében temették el abban a türbében, melyet már előkészített önmaga számára.

#gülfem #hürrem #sultanate of women #süleyman i #ayse hafsa sultan #ayse hafsa #hürem sultan

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hazkiwislutt · 6 years ago

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chapter one: singles, one night stands, and a baby shower

{ hey friends, it’s athena! here is chapter one of the chasing love series! if you haven’t read the prologue, it’s linked on my master list :) i hope you enjoy this series, and i’ve never written anything this long on this blog so if my writing gets a bit tired at the end, i apologize. i would like to improve on that to make the whole piece good! thank you for reading, it means the world, i loaf u! }

The night at Niall’s had come to a smooth close. The alcohol had hit Y/N harder than a freight train. She had been gently transported up the stairs to Niall’s guest room by Harry, who had left the party shortly after, and who decided that although he genuinely would have loved to stay behind and take care of her, he did have an early morning meeting with management that just couldn’t be postponed any longer. He’d laid her down on the bed and peeled back the covers to allow her to crawl under them, but to his amusement, she wrapped the covers on only one side of her body, and left the other half in the open air.

“Gotta make sure there’s not… a… uh… shit, what do they call it?” She slurred heavily as her eyes fluttered open and shut before she finished her sentence promptly, punctuating it with a burp. “Temperature imbalance.”

Harry had laughed at that, and she smiled lazily before patting his hand softly.

“You’re not going to be here when I wake up, huh?” Her voice was soft, and he was taken aback by her question. His face must’ve given away his surprise because she simply giggled sadly, and patted his hand once more, before shutting her eyes and dozing off.

Harry hadn’t seen her in over a month and a half since that night (not that he was counting), and while there was no terribly passionate burning to see her again, he couldn’t deny that she’d been on his mind more times than was socially acceptable. After his meeting, he’d gone home and immediately followed her on Instagram, and added every single one of her songs to his playlist. He was both irked and amazed at the talent she possessed and the music she produced, wondering how “she could be tha’ talented, an’ lovely, an’ captivating. S’a bit unfair, innit, Evie,” as his feline friend purred in response. He found himself picking up his phone to ask Niall if he had her number, but then he realized she was preparing to release a new single (it was the only thing she’d been posting about on her social media), which Harry knew meant that she’d be swamped in the studio. How many times had he been in that same position?

However, that didn’t stop him from watching every interview she’d ever done, and looking up trivial facts about her. He thought of her smile every time the sun flitted in through the airy curtains he had that covered his balcony window, and her laugh when the summer breeze rustled the trees that lined his driveway, and the way she’d looked at him with such adoration when the moon rose and he stood on his back patio to gaze at the stars.

Maybe there was a little bit of terribly passionate burning.

He supposed he just adored the energy she gave off– something he always looked for when making new friends, and he craved the witty conversation she’d carried with him that night, even if she were hammered.

Harry was threatening to crack under the weight of not wanting to disturb her musical process, and desperately wanting to meet her again, and it seemed that the universe had finally had enough of his sullen moping as he went to pick up his mail at the end of his driveway. He had opened his mailbox, a simple ivory one with pastel pink and purple handprints covering the expanse (courtesy of Anne and Gemma), and pulled out its contents, shuffling through the various envelopes as he sauntered back to his front door. Bills, no problem. Fuckin’ advertisements. Oh, coupons!

Harry had stopped dead in his tracks, right outside his own front door, as he held a small envelope that had been sent from Y/N. He smiled with endearment as he turned it over in his hands; sending a letter rather than asking for his number was exactly like something she’d do, even though Harry had only met her once. It’s hardly fair, Harry thought as he fumbled to open his door, that her handwriting is pretty, too. Her clunky scrawl wasn’t displeasing or difficult to read, but it was so characteristically her that it nearly made Harry’s head spin. He gently tore the envelope open to reveal a thick ivory card that had the words “you’re invited” printed nicely in the middle, before unfolding the card to read its contents.

Harry,

My newest single is dropping in three days! I’m holding a gathering with a few close friends and my team if you’d like to drop by for a bit… I never did get to thank you for being so lovely to me at Niall’s party. People will start coming by around 8:00 PM, but you’re welcome whenever it suits you… I don’t do much, anyhow. I hope this isn’t too last minute!

Fondly,

Y/N

Her number was written under her signature, and Harry’s heart lurched happily in his chest as he skipped giddily to the pantry, since this was a victory that deserved a bit of sparkling water and quinoa chips. Thank God, thank the universe, and thank the aliens nine galaxies over for this miracle! As Harry tore open a bag of his chips, crunching happily, he debated whether he should send her a text to acknowledge that he received her letter or not.

Before he could change his mind, he quickly punched her number into his phone and sent her a quick text.

It’s H. I’ll be there. Thank you for thinking of me. Xx

Her response came instantaneously, and Harry’s face broke into a grin, biting his lip as he read what she had to say.

Yay, I’m so glad you can come!

By the way… I didn’t know anyone even sent letters anymore. You’re old.

Heyyyyy :( You’re mean, Styles! I just think it’s nicer when someone sends you a letter. You can save letters… Can’t always save texts.

Her answer endeared Harry, but he soon began to think quickly, debating what to say in order to keep the conversation going, similar to the way he’d scrambled for words the night they met. However, his phone chimed with another message that brought him from his frenzied thoughts.

You know… I’ve released a lot of songs since all this happened to me, but I still get nerves before I release another one. That ever happen to you? Sorry if that’s weird to ask.

Harry stared at the screen, cheeks beginning to hurt from how much he’d smiled in the past few minutes, and began to type a response. He should’ve known, even after one meeting, that with Y/N, he’d never have to scramble to keep the conversation alive.

After a month of some terribly passionate burning and restless nights, Harry fell asleep soundly, head filled with floating images of a nice girl with a preference of letters to texts, a beautiful voice, the ability to chug Belvedere as if it were simply water, and CareBear pajamas.

...

Harry couldn’t resist coming earlier than eight o’clock. He wasn’t terribly early, just by fifteen minutes, but Y/N had given him the option! Was it so selfish of him to take the opportunity?

He’d deliberated his outfit for over an hour, scrutinizing which white t-shirt he should wear with his loafers and about five pairs of the same colored grey pants, before walking briskly to his car before he could change his mind. He couldn’t resist playing a couple of her songs as he drove up to her house, which was closer to his own than he realized.

Y/N’s house exterior was a pretty white and yellow scheme, and several accents, such as the door, were colored a warm mauve, and the setting LA sun cast a pretty glow upon it. It was very modern, just like Harry’s own house and most houses in this area tended to be, and seemed to be just as spacious as his own. There were windows nearly everywhere, and the house itself gave an air of fluidity and freedom of movement that put Harry at ease.

He stood at her door, shuffling his loafers quietly as he waited for her to answer his timid knock. The summer breeze ruffled his hair, and he swore to himself that he was only sweating because of the waning LA heat, not because he was about to see Y/N again. When he heard the lock click, Harry couldn’t help but break into a large grin as her eyes brightened and her smile reflected his own.

“Harry,” she cheered, before reaching out to hug him, and Harry tried his hardest not to squeeze her too tightly. She pulled away too quickly, if you asked him, but the way she grabbed his hand and led him into her home was enough to make up for it.

“Hello, love.” Y/N couldn’t help but swoon at his deep voice and the incredibly cute pet name that dripped from his lips thickly but sweetly. Harry noticed her eyes downcast, and smiled a bit smugly. She looked him over, thinking he looked lovely, before she realized he caught her eye and she averted her gaze shyly.

“Sorry… But do you mind if you take your shoes off? I just cleaned the floors.” She smiled sheepishly as Harry replied, “Course, love. S’yeh house, innit? Don’t mind it at all.”

After Harry removed his loafers, Y/N tugged him quickly towards the kitchen, as he studied her outfit: colorful striped pants that flowed loosely (and hugged her nicely, but he tried not to dwell on that) and a hanging gold necklace that lay atop her white t-shirt. Her hair was put up and her feet were bare. It was all very simplistic, but Harry could not stop looking at her.

“I’m so glad you could come! I’ll be honest, I would’ve wanted to see you earlier than today but I didn’t want to ask Niall for your number and be a creep, so-”

“So yeh asked for m’address?” Y/N turned around quickly, mouth open in an O-shape before she dropped his hand in mock offense.

“You are mean! And to think, I invited you into my home, to be here for the release of my new single!” She fisted her hands on her hips and scoffed, unable to deny the warm feeling in her cheeks as Harry stifled his boyish laughter with a fist, his eyes crinkling beautifully.

“M’only joking, love. I appreciate yeh thinking of me. Need any help setting anything up?” Y/N had led him into her kitchen, which was painted a soft mauve similar to her front door with white trim, and had light grey appliances. It was both very modern and cozy, and Harry adored it. The countertop of the island was littered with various trays, as well as a large bouquet of flowers that tied it all together.

“I think everything’s set, but if you don’t mind, I have to FaceTime my best friend. He left for San Diego this morning to visit his family, and I just want to make sure he made it okay.” Her phone was sitting on the island as well, nestled between some sort of casserole and the plates.

“Sure, should I just go out to the patio?” Harry began to walk toward the floor-to-ceiling glass sliding door, but Y/N reached for his bicep and pulled him back a bit.

“Oh, no! Please, it’ll only take two minutes. I don’t want to send you out there for so little time, plus it’s hot. He’s probably about to conk out anyway, and he’d love to say hello.” Harry smiled and nodded in acknowledgement as Y/N quickly unlocked her phone and went into her phone history to call her friend. She hummed as she clicked the most recent call, before pressing the speaker button and letting it ring.

“Fuck, that hurts… shit, I’m on the phone now, go away…” A slow, but pleasant, voice floated through the speakers as the video tumbled around wildly, showing the phone falling from some height. “No, do your own damn work, stop being a beggar. I’m on the pho- Ow! Get out already, Christ…”

The person cleared their throat before the phone was picked up and repositioned, showing a man with unkempt, but not unclean, light brown hair that flopped over his forehead as if he hadn’t done it that day. His glasses were a bit skewed upon his face and his eyes were a bright hazel, a sharp contrast to his cheeks that were flushed. He was rubbing his bicep and wincing, as if someone had just hit him.

“Sorry, Tony socked me ‘cause I won’t let him borrow my good swim trunks. I swear to God, one of these days I’m gonna suffocate him in his sleep… Anyways, how’s my girl?”

Harry’s eyes were raised in surprise at the quick events that had just unfolded, but Y/N seemed unfazed, gently drumming her fingers on the countertop. He admitted he was curious to see just how much of a best friend Y/N’s best friend was, since he’d called her “his girl” and it made Harry deflate a bit, but he didn’t show it visibly.

“One day, he’s going to shove you into the oven and cook you for dinner. But also, you ate the last of my iced oatmeal cookie granola bars yesterday, so you deserve it. As for me, I’m alright. I’m nervous, but excited.” Y/N spoke, her lips set in a pout that Harry thought was adorable as she positioned the phone so that it was standing upright against a bowl of fruit, showing both of them in the camera.

Harry watched as Andrew squinted at the screen of his phone before opening his mouth. “Hello, Harry. Thank you for taking care of Y/N. She’s annoying, and she sucks. Big fan of your music, and I’ve heard a lot about you ‘cause Y/N talks about you an insane amoun-”

“Andrew,” she shrieked, hands flying up to cover her face while she let out an exasperated groan. Harry chuckled and grinned as he absorbed the bond between the two of them; their energy was infectious, and after Andrew had revealed that Y/N talked about him, his spirits were lifted. .

“‘Lo, Andrew. I appreciate that, an’ I totally agree. She’s the worst, huh? Tell me about it, she got drunk at Niall’s party jus’ so I would carry her up t’bed. Then, she sends me a letter, to m’home address, as if tha’ isn’t weirder than sending a text.” Harry giggled and poked Y/N in the ribs, to which she responded by swiping at his hand and grunting. Andrew laughed as Harry assuaged her, “M’kidding, love,” and before he knew it, he’d slung an arm around her, pulling her into him and holding her close.

Y/N squeaked audibly, but Harry pretended not to notice as he rocked her back and forth. Internally, however, Y/N’s mind was screaming, because Harry was here, and Harry was holding her, and Harry was rocking her back and forth and she was so sure she would combust in the next few seconds.

“I swear to God,” she griped, her voice muffled from where her face pressed into Harry’s chest, “When I see you tomorrow, I’m going to kill you.”

“I love you, too. I’m tired, but I’ll see you tomorrow. I’m driving back up around 10:00 so I can make it by 12:00, but you have to make sure you’re on time. I’m serious, Y/N, you have to be there by 10:00… You don’t want Hannah to kill you. Be safe tonight, and call me if you need anything. I’m proud as hell, and I can’t wait to hear the single. I set an alarm to wake me up at 11:50 so I don’t miss it. Call me then so you can hear my reaction, okay?”

“You piss me off all the time but I guess I love you, too. Thank you, I’ll talk to you later.” Y/N’s voice was still muffled, but she pried herself away from Harry to end the call.

“I’m so sorry, I swear I didn’t tell him to say that, he just likes to piss me off but I-”

“Relax, love. S’okay, I don’ mind. Now, let’s fill tha’ vase up with a bit more water, yeah?”

Harry wanted to tell her that he thought about her just as much as she talked about him, but he decided against it. It was only the second time meeting her in person, and he didn’t want to frighten her. Hell, he didn’t want to frighten himself anymore than he already was, because everything with Y/N seemed to come so naturally, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to delve too deep into that dilemma yet.

...

As Y/N’s friends and team arrived, her and Harry became less attached so that she could greet everyone and play hostess. Harry talked with her management and some of her friends, because he was quite the social butterfly at times, but his eyes remained on her, and his mind couldn’t fathom the way she captivated him just by walking across the room. Harry was standing in the corner of her kitchen, finishing another capirihana and watching her lean against her counter, giggling prettily at one of her friends’ stories, and her eyes were glossy and blown out from the alcohol. Harry was buzzed, feeling more at ease and more free in his affectionate stares.

“Y/N! It’s 11:50, I’m going to get everyone together in the living room so we can start getting ready for the release!” Her manager, a spritely woman named Celeste, stood up excitedly from where she sat at the island, grabbing Y/N’s hand and twirling her around. “Oh, I’m so excited, I can’t wait for everyone to hear it! You really went all in for this one, and I’m so proud of you.” Y/N twirled and did a cute little dance that was a bit uncoordinated from the alcohol she’d consumed, but it was still painstakingly adorable to Harry. Everything about her made him starve, but he wouldn’t admit that yet.

They made eye contact as she looked around the room, and she smiled warmly at him, waving softly. Need you, she mouthed, and he nodded in acknowledgement.

“Okay, could you just give me a minute?” Y/N’s words were a bit slurred, but Celeste understood and nodded, ushering out the few people that were also in the kitchen. They casted glances at Harry, seeing that he didn’t move from where he stood rooted in the corner. Once they’d all left, Y/N had padded over softly, almost timidly, before coming to stand next to him and gently leaning her head upon his shoulder.

“I’m nervous, Harry. What if they don’t like it?” She inhaled deeply, shuddering on the exhale and turning her head to look up at him with large eyes that he could get lost in. He reached for her hand, stroking his thumb over hers gently.

“S’alright, love. I know wha’ it feels like to be scared tha’ no one’s going to care, tha’ they expected more, tha’ they wanted yeh to do this or summat else. But yeh made this from yeh heart, right? All the songs yeh make, the lyrics yeh write, an’ the melodies yeh sing are all from the heart, and f’they don’t like it, yeh shouldn’t give a damn… For the record, I know m’going to love it.” Y/N smiled up at him, bobbing her head and blinking rapidly, trying to stop tears that Harry hadn’t noticed were there.

“Oi, stop tha’, let’s go celebrate yeh.” He grabbed her by the hand, and led her down the hallway to the living room where everyone had gathered.

“Y/N! Andrew is on the phone,” Celeste shrieked, grabbing Y/N by the wrist and dragging her to the middle of the living room. Y/N’s phone was connected to the flatscreen at the front of the room, where Andrew was shovelling chips into his mouth sleepily. His nap was evident in the way his hair was tousled in every direction and the way his eyes drooped as he chewed.

“Andrew, you know those are bad for you!” Y/N, even in her inebriated state, was keen on keeping Andrew’s well-being at the forefront of her mind.

“I’m a struggling college student, I’ll eat chips at midnight if I damn well please.” Andrew’s eyebrows were knitted together as he shoveled chips with more vigor, causing Y/N to roll her eyes and mumble, “Drama queen.”

“Is everybody ready? It’s 11:58, I’m so nervous I could throw up,” Celeste moaned, covering her eyes with both hands before fanning her face rapidly. She grabbed the sound system control off of the coffee table and hovered her finger over the play button. “Anything you want to say before this one gets out?” Celeste began to hop from one foot to the other, jittering up and down as her eyes continued to flicker toward the clock on the wall. Y/N hummed thoughtfully, swaying back and forth before stating flatly, “I’ve released many singles since this all has happened to me, and each time, I feel like I need to shit.”

Everyone laughed, and Harry’s mouth dropped open before he began to giggle. He could never predict her train of thought.

“Holy fuck! It’s 12:00, Y/N, “Flower” is available on all streaming platforms!” Celeste jumped up and down wildly, pressing play on the remote, and the first seconds of Y/N’s song blared through.

It started off simply: a crackling noise reminiscent of records on vinyl layered on top of a soft guitar solo filled the room, before the last note wavered with a pretty vibrato. Suddenly, a lewd moan followed by a breathy “yes” permeated the sweet tension and a new melody, lilting, sultry, and passionate, floated in with a rocking beat on the drums.

Harry’s mouth dropped open as he processed the quick change of pace. He was no stranger to surprises; hadn’t he done the same thing to his fans on one of the tracks of his first solo album, all those years ago? The element of surprise was what gave Only Angel its edge.

But this was so much to absorb, he thought, as he listened to Y/N’s innocently sweet voice dance tantalizingly over the melody. The words were absolutely sinful, and as Harry listened on, he realized the song was about sex so good that it felt as if it were the first time she’d ever been touched. Harry began to sweat lightly, his face warming up as he listened to Y/N describe, in lyrics and guitar riffs, a fucking that was so good she felt it in her bones the next morning.

The song ended, and everyone in the room began to cheer, giving their accolades to a bashful Y/N.

“You’re sinful, Y/N, absolutely sinful! I’m calling the actual police! It’s a crime, it’s an absolute crime to write music that good, I can’t even believe...!” Andrew began to ramble, his sleep-heavy eyes were now blown wide, and his bag of chips discarded as he pressed his hands against his head and stared straight into the camera, dumbfounded.

Harry was still as stone, staring at Y/N as she moved around the room, sweetly shaking people’s hands and crushing them in tight hugs.

He would never think of flowers the same, ever.

...

Y/N’s guests had cleared out shortly after, but Harry had lingered. At first, he had gone into the bathroom to calm himself down, pacing back and forth in her guest bathroom and dabbing his face with cold water. He stared at himself in the mirror for a solid mirror, commanding himself to get it together.

Then, he’d walked out, right as Y/N was bidding goodbye to the last guest, and offered to “help clean the kitchen, love, ‘cause I made a right mess of tha’ casserole tha’ Celeste brought”. They’d giggled and talked about everything, from aliens to their favorite films, and their favorite snacks to Y/N’s old bus driver from when she was still in middle school. They were both still buzzed, but talking to her made Harry feel as if he were sobering up.

Now, the kitchen was nearly spotless, especially since Harry had been scrubbing the same corner of the counter for almost five minutes, prolonging the time he got to spend with Y/N, and he knew that he had to say something to at least convey a small part of his feelings.

“The song… Yeh song s’really fuckin’ great… Threw me for a loop, but in the best kind of way.” Harry decided to start there, divulging this information as he wrung out the towel he had been using to wipe the counter with in the sink. Y/N was sitting on the island counter, legs swinging back and forth aimlessly.

“You really liked it?” Y/N’s voice slurred in a hopeful manner, as if she could hardly believe him, and it made Harry’s heart ache. Harry turned around to look at her fully, before drying his hands and crossing the short space between them in one stride. He stood in front of her, reaching his hands out to grasp her shoulders and rub soothing circles on them with his thumbs. She responded by placing her hands on his waist, whimpering softly, eyes fluttering with the weight of the alcohol, and God, she was just so cute that Harry could just kiss her right now.

“F’course I did, love. Who knew someone so sweet could write something so tastefully naughty?” He felt Y/N shiver, and watched her eyelashes rest upon the tops of her cheeks as she shut her eyes. Harry felt the way she unintentionally squeezed him where her hands were positioned, and maybe Harry was a lot drunker than he thought because he probably wouldn’t have said that so blatantly while he was standing in such close proximity if he weren’t.

“Let me see yeh eyes, love. Don’t run from me.” Harry tutted and chucked under her chin with two fingers as Y/N’s eyes snapped open, her breathing beginning to shallow. Her caught her bottom lip in between her teeth and blinked slowly at him, and Harry wished that he could be the one doing that to her. The alcohol was doing all of the talking at this point, because Harry felt himself smugly enjoying the effect he was having on her, and the effect she was having on him, if the tightening in his pants was anything to go by.

“Such a pretty girl, hm? But yeh so naughty, aren’t yeh?” Harry’s voice was low, and without thinking, he ducked his head down to tuck into her neck, breathing heavily and skimming his lips along her skin.

“Harry,” she breathed, “You’re making me dizzy being so close.” Harry pulled back slowly, because that statement was ambiguous, and although the alcohol was talking, his brain wasn’t deaf to reality, and he would never overstep boundaries without checking if the person was more than sure of his, or their own, actions.

“M’sorry, love. Too much? I can stop. M’so sorry, don’t know wha’ came over-”

“No,” Y/N squeaked, her eyes wide and her skin radiating enough heat that Harry could feel it even from where he’d put space between them, “I like it. I like what you’re doing to me, please.. Please keep doing it.” She rushed out the last sentence quickly, before pulling him back in, diminishing the space between them, and Harry couldn’t help but chuckle darkly.

“Wha’ did I tell yeh? Absolutely filthy,” he hummed, leaning back in to graze his lips over her throat, “Tell me, love. Wha’ kind of experience did yeh have to have to write a song so nasty?” He sunk his teeth softly into her skin, revelling in the way she pulled him closer so that their bodies were flush against each other and whined as she felt Harry growing underneath her.

“I didn’t,” she gasped, her thoughts swirling as Harry continued to skim her skin, “It’s not about me. It’s… it’s about someone else describing their experience and me wanting to have something just like it.. Oh!” Harry bit down once again as she finished her sentence, groaning as she revealed this information in her inebriated state, before trailing kisses up her neck and placing one, hot and heavy, on her lips that were slicked with spit and puffy from being held between her teeth.

“Wha’ a shame, innit? Tha’ someone as beautiful as yeh has never had an experience like tha’? If I could, I’d treat yeh proper… I’d have yeh absolutely soaking for me, an’ I’d give yeh a good fucking all night long.” Y/N whimpered wetly, breath coming out in short puffs and thighs pressing against Harry’s hips as he stood in between them.

“Please, please do it.” Her voice was reedy and breathy, and Harry exhaled as if he’d been punched in the stomach. He pulled away momentarily to make sure he wasn’t reading anything wrong, before capturing her bottom lip between his fingers, pulling gently.

“Want me to give yeh the type of shag tha’ puts the description in yeh song to shame?”

Y/N’s nod was all he needed to grab her and cart her up the stairs, pressing sloppy kisses against every inch of her face as she leaned into him and groaned into his mouth. It was a bit funny, Harry thought, that he was carrying Y/N up the stairs to put her into bed again, but this time he’d be joining her.

He wasn’t complaining, he decided, as he set her on the bed and rucked his white t-shirt off quickly while Y/N’s eyes stared at him hungrily, before ducking down to kiss her with more fervor.

He wasn’t complaining at all.

...

Y/N was having a lovely dream. She was in a field, but the day was sunny and the brightness of the sky reminded her of Harry. The ground began to shake in a thrumming beat that reminded her eerily of her own song that she’d released the night before…

“Fuck,” Y/N whispered to herself, eyes blinking open and squinting shut again as the sunlight flickered in through her window. The thumping in her dream was actually the thumping headache she had from last night’s festivities: the party, the alcohol, the single, and…

“Holy shit.” Y/N whispered once more, biting her knuckle as she slowly turned around to take in the sight of a very beautiful, but very naked, Harry Styles. The comforter was covering his lower half, but his hair was spread out upon Y/N’s pillow and his arm was wrapped around her midsection, which was just as bare as he was. Fuck, shit, fuck, shit!

Y/N didn’t regret it; she fully understood what was happening last night, and the answer she’d given Harry to take her to bed was something she wanted wholeheartedly. However, as Y/N’s bleary eyes focused on the red numbers of her alarm clock, her heart dropped into her ass as she realized what she’d done. Y/N was almost certain she was going to die today.

Today was her other best friend’s baby shower, and Andrew had even specifically told her to not be late on FaceTime yesterday. Hannah was going to kill her. Y/N was supposed to pick up the cake, the centerpieces, the food, and some last minute decorations, and she was supposed to be there by 10:00, which was fifteen minutes ago, and Hannah lived about a half hour away, maybe more with LA traffic. The baby shower starts at 11:00, and Y/N had to be there because not only was she bringing the majority of the party, she was also going to be the godmother.

Y/N breathed in deeply, gathering herself and trying to find a way out of Harry’s hold on her waist. She didn’t want to wake him up, or disturb him, and she had to leave as fast as possible. She turned a bit to look at him once more, feeling guilty as she realized he’d wake up and she wouldn’t be there. She knew what that felt like, but maybe she could write him a nice note and tell him where she went, and that they could catch up soon.

She had two options: roll as quick as she could off the bed and break Harry’s hold, or simply unwind his arm from her. Both would probably result in him waking up, but Y/N decided she was wasting too much time thinking and not enough time getting ready, so she chose the first option, and rolled off of her bed, landing on the floor with a dull thump. She held her breath (although, falling on the ground surely knocked it all out of her) and waited a beat, waiting to see if Harry would wake up. He didn’t.

She sighed heavily, before scampering downstairs to retrieve her phone where she left it in the living room the night before. She picked it up from where it lay on the table, face down, and turned it over, to reveal she had twenty-three missed calls from Hannah, four from Andrew, and a flurry of texts from the both of them in their group chat. She was dead.

Groaning quietly, she unlocked her phone quickly and sat down on the couch, trying to decide who to call first, and ultimately deciding on Andrew, because at least he wouldn’t chew her head off as aggressively as Hannah was about to.

“Hello?” Y/N’s voice stuck in her throat, but before she could clear it and repeat herself, Andrew’s voice carried through the speaker shrilly.

“Holy shit, you’re dead, you’re dead, you are so dead! I told you it wasn’t a good idea to have the party, Y/N, I told you… Fuck your driving, grandpa, get out of the fast lane! You just woke up, you literally… Oh my god, Hannah’s going to rip you to shreds.” Y/N winced, holding the phone away from her ear as Andrew kept rambling, his voice making the pounding in her head louder.

“Jesus, Andrew, will you chill the fuck out? It was Celeste’s idea, for the record, to celebrate this, I didn’t know I was going to get carried away and have… Shit, I mean, anyways, where are you?” Andrew gasped on the other side of the phone.

“Have what, Y/N? What did you have?”

Y/N groaned, slamming her palm into her hand, “Nothing! Fuck, I didn’t have anything, we’ve got bigger things to worry about. Now, where the hell are you?”

“I don’t believe you. You did something, and I’m going to find out, but right now I’m about to get on the freeway back. I can’t come save your ass this time, I’m afraid.”

“Okay, okay. I’m just going to tell her sorry that I got drunk and didn’t listen to you guys, and that she’s welcome to punch me in the head after she gives birth… Listen, you think I’ll be able to make it to her house in under thirty at this time?” Andrew was silent, and Y/N already knew the answer.

“It’s a Saturday morning, Y/N, and the freeways are going to be packed… I don’t think you can do it. Just try to get there as fast as you can. Be safe, love you. Call Hannah!” The line went dead, and Y/N sucked her teeth and inhaled deeply as she dialed Hannah.

“Oh, my God, Y/N, you better have a damn good reason why you’re not here right now otherwise I’m revoking your godmother privileges and tearing your heart out to feed to my child!” Hannah’s voice came through the speaker as a growl.

“I’m really sorry I didn’t listen to you guys! I literally just woke up, and I know you’re going to be super angry but I’m going to get there as soon as I can, okay?” Hannah grunted in a displeased manner, and Y/N heard scuffling and a murmur in the background.

“What? Can’t you see I’m busy? Get out! Christ… Okay, fine. Just get here before 11:30 or your godmother position is being given to Julie.” Y/N gasped, ready to protest, but the line went dead.

“Damn it, damn it… Shit, okay… I’m going to get ready, and I’ll call Dan…” Y/N trailed off, her head beginning to hurt more as she realized she gave her driver the day off because she was supposed to be on schedule today. She groaned loudly, before leaning her head against the sofa and closing her eyes. She couldn’t drive like this, not when her head was pounding and she saw colored lights behind her eyes.

“A’right, love?” A deep voice croaked from behind her, and Y/N whipped around to see Harry standing in the doorway of the living room, boxers slung low on his hips, knuckling at his sleepy eyes.

“No, I don’t know, I just-”

“Yeh’re the godmother to yeh friend’s first baby an’ yeh were s’posed to be there already, huh?” Y/N eyed him, brows quirking up in question.

“Happened to me too, w’my first godchild. And, yeh had about a thousand Post-It notes reminding yeh of wha’ yeh needed to get done all over yeh bedside table. Tha’ gave it away.” Y/N bit her lip, worrying it as she thought about how to ask Harry if he could give her a ride. What if he had other things to do?

“Tell yeh wha’, love. Yeh look like yeh in worse shape than I am, so get ready, I’ll send my assistant to grab the stuff, an’ I’ll give yeh a ride down to yeh friend’s house. Tha’ okay?” He was a mindreader, apparently, because Y/N’s mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. “Close it, love. Going t’catch bugs if yeh do tha’, an’ I’m not sure I’ll kiss yeh again with a mouthful of bugs.”

He turned around promptly and Y/N heard him climbing back up the stairs. That was one way to address what happened last night. Sighing, she stood back up from the couch and followed.

...

“So, tell me about yeh best friend, then.” Harry and Y/N were stuck in traffic, sunglasses adorning both of their faces and Y/N ducking down a bit in her seat. Both of them knew the risks of the lives they lead, and they knew that anyone could see anything at anytime.

“Her name’s Hannah, and she’s been my best friend since we were in middle school, just like Andrew. We all went to school together. Her and her husband have always wanted kids early. He lived on the east coast at the time, because they met online, and she’d always wanted to go to school there. They weren’t in the same state, but they were within three hours of each other, and they made it work. She flew back the summer after freshman year and told me they were getting married, which was like, a year and a half ago, and now they’re having a kid.” Harry nodded, pulling his lip between his thumb and pointer finger.

“I think s’nice,” Harry said, “tha’ yeh still friends with the friends yeh had before this all happened to yeh. Keeps yeh rooted, dunnit?”

“Always.” Y/N replied, staring out the window as the traffic started to move.

...

“Thank God, you’re finally here!” Hannah crushed Y/N in a hug as soon as she knocked, all anger forgotten. Hannah lived in the suburbs, about a half an hour away from Y/N’s Beverly Hills house. The gate was decorated with pastel yellow duck cutouts, and pastel pink balloons swayed in the wind from where they were tied to the gate posts.

“Hello to you, too. Careful, you might crush your child. Besides, I thought you were mad at me.” Y/N pulled back and smoothed her hand over her best friend’s bump, smiling as she felt a small kick.

“Shut it, you know I love you. Whose assistant dropped off the stuff, anyway?” Hannah placed her hands on her stomach, rubbing gently.

“S’mine. M’Harry, lovely to meet yeh.” Harry walked up the step, coming into view from behind Y/N, and Hannah’s mouth dropped.

“What the fuck? Harry Styles is at my doorstep? Why the fuck is Harry Styles on my doorstep?” Hannah’s eyes darted from Y/N’s to Harry’s as both let out a laugh. “Oh, my God, you should’ve told me Y/N, my house looks like hell!”

“It’s fine! Harry doesn’t care.” Y/N flashed a grin at him, which he returned, and suddenly the wheels in Hannah’s head began turning as she realized exactly why Y/N was late. Y/N and her had been best friends long enough to know what the other was thinking, and Y/N’s eyes widened as she realized Hannah had figured it out.

“I’m going to walk Harry back to his car,” Y/N screeched abruptly, grabbing Harry’s arm and flying down the steps.

“Isn’t he going to eat? Or did he already?” Hannah called out, snark and teasing lacing her tone, as Y/N quickened her pace.

“He’s got a meeting, so hard pass!” Y/N called back.

“Lovely to meet yeh, hope to see yeh soon! Congratulations!” Harry waved as Y/N dragged him along down the driveway and to his car. “Hey, slow down! What’s the matter?” Y/N was puffing hard, and she released Harry’s hand with an apologetic look.

“Nothing. Nothing’s wrong! I… Thank you. For taking care of me, again… Um… in more ways than one.” Y/N felt her face heat up as she mentally beat herself up for saying that out loud, but Harry simply chuckled and rubbed her arm with the back of his hand.

“Pleasure’s all mine, love. I had a really good time last night. No regrets or anything. Text me later?” Y/N nodded eagerly, giving Harry a tight squeeze after quickly scanning the area. That was another way to address what happened last night.

Harry hopped into his car, starting the engine and began driving away from the curb, watching Y/N’s figure get smaller as he picked up speed, before turning the volume up on his radio and plugging his phone into the aux cord.

He drove onto the highway, merging quickly onto the freeway as Y/N’s song blared from his speakers, drumming his fingers to the beat, which reminded him of last night. If he ran his tongue over his teeth, he could make out the faint taste of her. He let it flood his taste buds, smiling smugly to himself knowing that he gave her a shag that put her song to shame as he remembered the breathy whimpers of “yes, there” and the weepy cries of “Harry!” that left her mouth. He couldn’t wait to hear them again.

75 notes · View notes

elsewhereuniversity · 8 years ago

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FAQ and Tags Masterpost

What is Elsewhere University?

Elsewhere University is a university on a fairy hill, as first depicted in this comic I drew a year ago! People began asking questions about the world, and then writing stories and drawing art set within it, and then building on each other’s stories and on my answers about the world, and it’s become a big lovely sandbox (the second comic‘s entire purpose is to celebrate some of my favorite things that have grown exclusively out of the fandom). The various submitted stories aren’t necessarily compatible with each other, because there are currently well over 2k stories and asks building this world and expecting anyone to know all of that is absolutely mad. But they’re all built on the same base mythology of folklore+college weirdness outlined in the first comic.

Where can I find the original comic?

As part of my Tapastic series, or on my main blog.

My ask/fortune/submission hasn’t shown up yet.

At the time of this writing, my inbox is around 2500, and roughly 3/4 of those are student asks. There’s going to be a bit of a wait before anything you submit sees the light of day (although stories will show up before fortunes do). I know it’s not ideal, but I will reach it eventually, I promise!

That said (given that this is tumblr) message me privately, off anon, if you’d like to make sure it hasn’t been eaten by the website. If you can give me a username or an exact phrase to ctrl+f, I’d be happy to check that it made it safely to my inbox! But if you send a find-it ask on anon, I won’t answer it - I get enough of those that it would clutter up the blog pretty badly.

Are there any guidelines for Elsewhere U fanworks?

The bare minimum - it should be readable with regards to grammar/spelling, it should be related to Elsewhere University, and, you know, don’t be an asshole. Don’t worry too much about continuity! Due to the sandbox nature of the project, that’s all a bit fuzzy anyway.

Fortunes should be about the size of a single ask.

Nothing made or sold for profit.

How should I get my submission to you?

One option is to submit a story through tumblr

Another is to publish it on your own blog, or on AO3 (there’s an official tag!) or somewhere else

If you opt for something other than submitting it through this blog, send me a link through messaging or an ask if you’d like to see it shared here!

You can try @’ing me but I’m not great at checking that.

And lastly if you do post it somewhere else, please credit this blog or the original comic specifically. Thank you!

Types of posts

Stories - written prose submissions

Art - comics and illustrations of the world

Students and Charms - fortunes and futures

Vignettes - very short stories

Podcast - episodes of Elsewhere University Student News, a fan podcast

Tv Tropes Page

Poetry

Recs - Reader-submitted books/games/etc in the vein of this blog

Love letters to majors - submissions specifically regarding the ups and downs of a major

Newsletter - Elsewhere U newsletters and notices

Prophecies - vague, ominous, regarding the future

Advice - do

Warnings - do not

Original - my contributions to Elsewhere

GENERAL TAGS

Changelings - what the Fair Folk leave when they steal your roommate

The Forbidden Major - the (banned) study of the Fair Folk

Knights - students keeping the campus safe. Crusaders, mercenaries, and idealists.

Stolen Away - so you’ve gotten yourself kidnapped into a weird magical summer world

Deals - striking bargains

Debts - Owing

The Aftermath - Graduation and afterwards

Courtesies - the politics of please and thank you

Legacies - people who fit in better than they expected

The Treaty - Posts touching on the delicate agreement between the university and the Elsewhere

Belief - reality gets malleable here

Names - Names and their power. Full FAQ below.

PLACES

Location - where the fuck is this school, anyway (and a masterpost of the borders)

The Pool

The Library

The Theatre (and The Play)

The Dorms (dorm list/summary here)

The Forest

The Train Tracks

The River

The Wishing Well

The Greenhouse

The Unsea

Walmart

Denny’s

LIFE ON CAMPUS

Student Life - anything to do with day to day Elsewhere U existence

Majors - a full alphabetized list of majors and their standing with the Gentry at the end of this page

Prospective Students - why people come to EU

International Students - how they deal with this bullshit

Sports - what sports, where, and why they’re Off

Parties - hella revels

Food - “We must not look at goblin men, we must not buy their fruits: Who knows upon what soil they fed their hungry thirsty roots?”

Electronics - how that works out (or rather, doesn’t)

School Spirit, and on a related note the Mascot and the school Motto (full list of mottoes below)

Graduation

Greek Life

Holidays

Games

Sign Language

Marching Band

Clubs and Secret Societies

Student Witches

STAFF

Professors - who in their right minds would work here (list and summary of notable professors here)

RAs - Resident Advisors and their responsibilities

The Librarians

Administration

Groundskeepers - nonacademic staff. A statistically unlikely number own swords.

NOTABLE INDIVIDUALS AND PHENOMENA

The Foxy Lady

Jimothy

The Wyrm -the dragon sleeping under the condemned building in the western corner of the campus

Anna Monday

The Wild Hunt

The Washer at the Ford - she will tell you the time of your death, but only if you’re into that

Courts - here the year turns on Spring and Autumn

The Tall One - warning

Royalty - don’t speak of them

Cat-Eyes - purveyor of Seeing glasses

The Rose Prince

FOLKLORE

Protection - including iron, salt, and running water

The Sight - including modified glasses, silver, and mirrors

VARIOUS

Ghosts

Werewolves

Banshees

Brownies

Sirens

Selkies

Gremlins

Mermaids

Kelpies

ANIMALS

The Crows - Do Not Wrong The Crows

Pets - Fish, Cats, Dogs

Wildlife - Birds, Insects

Horses

School Mottos thus far (translations may be incorrect - I haven’t personaly checked them)

Cauti, Cordati, Auspicati - Wary, Wise, and Lucky

Cum Gladio Et Sale - With Sword and Salt

Fainiciúil, Ciallmhar, Ámhar - Wary, Wise, and Lucky

yn dilyn y seren - Following The Star

Beware the Lights

Swallow the Hidden Names

BLOOD AND BONES BLOOD AND BONES BLOOD AND BONES

Tine Agus Airgead - Fire and Silver

כבדו את העורבים - Respect The Crows

Tha Iad Ag Innse Gun Bhreaug - They Tell No Lies

Carpe Nihil - Seize Nothing

Iron and Salt - a warning

Aspectum, Dolorem, Sacrificium - Sight, Sorrow, Sacrifice

Scientia Defendit Fideles - Knowledge protects the faithful

What Doesn’t Bend Will Break

Names FAQ

What’s a true name? The name that you consider to be truly yours; it’s highly personal and subjective.

Does the legal status of the name matter? No.

Can nicknames be true names? Yes.

Can you have more than one true name? How would that work? Yes. Depending on what each name meant to you, each true name might have power over you in its entirety, or each be part of a larger whole.

If I pronounce or spell my name differently/use a derivative or variation of my true name as a safe name, would that be safe? No. It wouldn’t have power over you, but it wouldn’t be hard to discover your true name.

What happens if someone speaks my true name? If you are given a command with your true name, you are compelled to obey it. This is only true in the Elsewhere and areas affected by it.

Can safe names influence a person over time? It’s unusual, but it’s happened.

Can a safe name become your true name? Yes; if you feel yourself becoming too attached to a safe name, it’s time to change it (not an uncommon event).

How does the school deal with safe names? Student IDs and role call lists for professors include the student number and the preferred name of a student. There’s a hard ban on obscenity, at least as far as the safe names in the school system go, but even so, they range from mundane to pop culture to total nonsense.

Would a name with negative associations be a good safe name? Yes, in the sense you’d never have to worry about growing too attached too it.

Is it possible to be nameless? Yes, which renders you invulnerable to this particular hazard. There are still plenty of other pitfalls, so overall the nameless don’t attract too much malice from the Gentry.

Is my last name part of my true name? It depends on the importance it holds for you. But even if it doesn’t signify anything, it’s recommended you keep all parts of your legal name secret in order to make it more difficult for anyone to find personal information on you.

How does the school protect true names? The administration offices are heavily guarded against both human and Elsewhere intruders, including but not limited to 24/7 guards, iron in all the walls, heavily password-protected computers, and formidable custom iron filing cabinets that hold all the paperwork they couldn’t avoid printing out.

Does everyone on campus go by a safe name? Almost everyone. There’s always a few skeptic freshman who don’t buy into what is presented as Elsewhere university’s ‘unique traditions’. The lucky ones are given nicknames by other students who persist until the skeptic has stopped protesting. The unlucky ones find out the hard way why you don’t want anyone to know your true name.

Majors

accounting majors

animal husbandry majors

anthropology majors

architecture majors

art majors

art history majors

astrophysics majors

bio majors

biochem majors

biomech majors

business majors

chem majors

classics majors

comp sci majors

culinary arts majors

dance majors

econ majors

education majors

engineering students

english majors

environmental studies majors

film majors

forestry and wildlife majors

geology majors

history majors

humanities majors

journalism majors

language majors

law majors

math majors

midwives

military

mortuary science majors

music majors

philosophy majors

physics majors

poli-sci majors

pre-med majors - any medicine-related fields

pre-vet majors

psyche majors

smiths - the tag for shop class and metalworking

sociology majors

stats majors

textile majors

theatre majors

theology majors

#tags #faq

883 notes · View notes

akxyaptn-blog · 5 years ago

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tellytantra · 5 years ago

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Nandini's POV: Wow what an eventful day.... Today morning i had a fight with my husband opps so - called husband.... Grrrrrrr..... I just hate him can't he just fulfil my one wish huh!! And now I am sitting in a club drinking alcohol. I am not so high. I know what i am doing and i have to be in control so that i can go home. And suddenly i saw a man approaching towards me and he came and asked me for a drink, why wouldn't he as i am wearing a short dress or you can say very short dress and he must be thinking that i am inviting him. Nandini's attire: Huh!! These men na i tell you always demanding Huh!! These men na i tell you always demanding. But he is really hot and looking so handsome uff.. Maar daala Man's attire: Man's attire: End of POV. Man: hi beautiful N: hi handsome Man: oh so you think i am handsome? Hmmmm!!!! N : i can also ask you the same.. You think i am beautiful..??? He chuckled and said: well if you are asking this then i should say the the truth Nandini putting her hands on his chest and said sexily : yes you should😉 Man: hmm so the truth is that you are really very hot and sexy.. He said huskily N: (smirking )thanks 😉 But i have to ask you something Man: Don't ask baby just order N: Then i order you to come with me Man:(smirking )if i will come with you then what will you do with me N: is there any need to ask this question With this she pulled him by his jacket's collar and pressed her lips against his. They were kissing wildly and hungrily biting each other lips and sucking them. They both parted away as they were out of breathe. Man: Whats your name sweetheart N: (huskily ) don't ask the name baby lets be strangers and enjoy tonight. But before that i have to tell you something Man: what N: I am married Man: ohh Is that so N: yes but i don't think so that it matters to you Man: Nope it don't matters to me at all because now all i want is you. N: So shall we Man: as you say so Then my place or yours N: Nah lets just go to the hotel. It will be more fun (she said tracing her finger from his eyes to his lips) Man: Ok babes lets go. They were on there way to the hotel but he stopped the car in between N: Why did you stopped the car Man: 2mins baby... Ill be back She nodded and came back with a paper bag N: Whats in this.??? Man: Ill tell you later. First lets just find a hotel. Nandini nodded her head in a yes and they both drove towards a hotel. After some time they reached a high class hotel and asked for a room. The receptionist gave them the keys of their room and told them the way. Inside the room: N: finally we are here ALONE N: finally we are here ALONE Man: yes baby With this he pushed her on the bed and hovered over her and said Man: Baby let me tell you one thing that i am kinda wild person so i love everything wild even sex also so i am warning you if don't want it rough and wild then i can stop N: you don't need to as i also want to experience something wild The man smirked and started kissing her neck and cleavage. He was biting her harshly and she was moaning. N: Oh god.... You are too much Ahh... Man: do you like that (he asked while kissing ) N: Oh.. Yes Then he started removing her clothes and left her in her undergarments She also removed all his clothes and left only his boxer. The man got up and took her in his arms and make her sit on the table beside the bed Man: you wanted to know na whats in the packet N: yes He opened the bag and took out many packets of condom. N: oh so this is the thing you bought but why these are so many Man: Its because i want you to choose which you want while we do it as there are so many flavors N: what flavors Man: chocolate, strawberry, coffee and.... N: shhh stop Man: what happened N: its enough we can use strawberry one and keep all those back Man: ok babes He kept all the packets of condom and took only strawberry one Then he picked her again and made her lay down on the bed Man: Shall we start She nodded and pulled him for a kiss. After some ti.e they broke the kiss and he removed her undergarments and his boxer N: Impressive Man: what is impressive baby N: you know what i am talking about He smirked and moved towards her chest and started sucking and biting her breast. He was sucking her n*pples with great force that she can't even breathe N: (moaning)Oh god.... You are such a monster.... Man: Told you He started moving downwards while kissing her and reached between her thighs and started licking her core ferociously and sucking it very hard. There were no limits of nandini's moaning all she want his him inside her. But he wasn't even stopping his torturers and he inserted his 1finger inside her and she moaned loudly N: ahhhh... Ah.. ah Please After hearing this he inserted his second finger inside her and she moaned to the loudest. He was moving his finger very fast and going faster time to time and nandini couldn't handle it anymore and she orgasm. Man: Baby you are so wet for me and i cant wait to be inside you N: You don't have to, i also want the same With that he wear the condom and entered inside her. N: Oh fuck.... You are so big.... Ahh.... Man: i know baby.. He started moving in and out and was doing it fast Man: oh.. Baby this feels so good to be inside you.. Agggghhhhhh... N: ahh... ahhh.. Faster... Faster... Faaassttt. He increased his speed and started doing it very fast Man: baby.... I haavee... to.. ask.. you... sooomeeethiinggg... N: yeees.. Oh god.. Man:(while doing it)if you are married then why are you here i mean you can do it with your husband also N:(breathing and moaning)yes i can..... do.... it...... with... myhusband....... but its my.... Wish... Ummm... Ah... Man: what wish N: To do it with a stranger Man: your... wishes.... are..wierd N:ummm..... Yes i know.. (she chukled)ummmm.. Man: Whats the name of your husband N:(moaning )Manik... Manik malhotra Man: Nice name huh!! N: Shut up and continue your work After 2-3 hours they stopped and was breathing very heavily Man: This was soo good N: I know Man: But ab tumhare 5 hours poore hue N: no na itni jaldi nhi bas 1 hour more na Man: shut up now no more. I am tired of this yaar bas ab bahut hua N: Maanik please na Please please please please please pretty please M: Shut up nandu ab mujhse aur nhi hoga ye stranger wala naatak ab tumhari wish maine poori kardi na. Tumhari saari wish list complete hufffffffff.... N: NOOO mani please na abhi nhi hui bas thodi der aur na kitna maza aa rha tha tumhe stranger ke avatar me dekhne me M: Nandini STOP ab bhut hua. I know tumne kaha tha ki tum mere saath apni saari wish list poori karna chahti ho aur maine tumhare liye kya-kya nhi kiya chori kari, jhooth bola, tumhare saath b-grade movie dekhne gaya aur toh aur tumhare liye bandar bhi bana aur ab toh kamaal hi kar diya direct stranger bas ab aur nhi. He said all this in one breathe N: Ok manik take deep breathe and you only said na you will fulfill all my wishes then what had happened to you M: bas ab yaar saari wishes ho toh gyi ab please na baby N: ok my dear hubby ho gyi saari wishes complete. But the best part was monkey one awww you were looking shhhooo shhhoooo sshhhhhhooooooo cute Aww my baby M: Yaa yaa kaise bhul sakta hu vo din jab tumne mujhe bandar banaya tha Flashback Nandini was sitting in their room thinking something very deeply when she saw manik coming towards her and she totally ignored him thinking something very deeply when she saw manik coming towards her and she totally ignored him. He came and sat beside her. M: kya hua mere baby ko what are you thinking shona.? N: Manik i think meri wish list kabhi bhi poori nhi ho payegi.... She started sobbing M: kyu baby kya hua why are you crying shhhh don't cry na tell me what happened N: (sobbing )Manik meri na ek wish hai ki i want to spend time with a monkey for a whole day and i want to enjoy it to the fullest with him and na and na... M: STOP..... Seriously nandini like seriously tumhari wishes ko ho kya gaya hai tumna lahi zoo me jaa kr raho wahi better hai tumhare liye After listening this nandini started crying loudly and was literally shouting N:(while crying) Manik you don't love me. You can't fulfil my ittu si wish M: Nandu i love you shona but ab mai monkey kaha se arrange karu vo bhi aaj N: (childish)Who shaid that i want a leal montey M: Then which kind opps which breed of monkey do you want (he said sarcastically ) N: (cutely) I na want you to be a monkey . M: what!!!!! Noooooo N: mani please na please please please please please please please M: Nandini no ways I am not gonna do this N: If you love me then you have to do this or else i will start crying again and and and i.. i.i. will na M: You will what tell me tell me N: I will.. i will haa i will not let you touch me for 1 week yess M: what but N: 2 weeks M: par N: 4 weeks M: 1 min 2 ke baad 4 kaise N: are double ho rha hai na iss liye. Now this is your punishment if you will not do what i want M: (murmers) this is called emotional blackmailing N: What did you just said M: Nothing baby i said that i will be your monkey for one day ok na Nandini happily hugged him tightly and said : Maniii you are the best I love you.. After some time manik came wearing a costume of monkey After some time manik came wearing a costume of monkey N: Aww my monkey is looking shoo cute my baby M: aacha aacha theek hai now do whatever you want to with your monkey it is only for one day N: Hmm so the first thing i want you to do is dance haa yes dance M: nandini... N: shut up u r my monkey you have to do whatever i say or else you know na M: fine. N: hmm so dance on one of my fav. song ''Shiela ki jawani'' M: nandini seriously shiela ki jawani i am a monkey ok.. No no no i mean i have became a monkey Ok so how can you want a monkey to dance on these kind of songs N: only my monkey can do this chalo start ho jao i am playing the song She started playing the song and manik started dancing like katrina kaif. Nandini was laughing like crazy and after some time they both were dancing on romantic song. N: wow this was so much fun M: now can i change He started going N: Are wait na abhi toh starting hai chalo now come with me to the kitchen M: hmm They both entered the kitchen N: chalo monkey you must be tired na so drink this milk N: chalo monkey you must be tired na so drink this milk She handed him a glass of milk He was making disgusting faces but he drank it as he knows if he wouldn't do that then she might started crying again M: done N: aww my monkey now you have to catch me as i will run ok M: are par tum bhaag kyu rahi ho jab mujhe tumhe pakadna hi hai toh mai aise hi pakad leta hoo na Manik comes close to nandini and back hugs her N: No na i will run and you will catch me that will be so much fun. M: (accepting his defeat ) fine N: now start With this she started running in the whole house and manik oh sorry monkey started chasing her and after sone time he caught her M: WOW nandu you make me so tired N: Aww manik you must be tired na M: (in mind) agar yes bolunga toh fir se doodh peene ko bolegi. M: no baby i am not tired N: Ok then now you have to give me a piggyback ride M: (frustrated )Par mai toh monkey hu piggyback ride kaise de sakta hoo say something else After listening this Nandini was on the verge of crying and manik saw that she might cry any moment so said yes M: (in mind) blackmailing ki bhi ek limit hoti hai. Dikh nhi raha mai kitna tired feel kar raha hu aur ab kahunga toh rono start. Such a dramebaaz wife... Huffff.. N: Monkey listen M: Nandini I am not a monkey call me manik N: (angrily ) NO you are monkey for one day so i will call you monkey only. You understand M: (accepting his defeat ) ok N: You wait Ill be back in five minutes. After 5 minutes nandini came holding a box of sweets and chocolate After 5 minutes nandini came holding a box of sweets and chocolate M: nandu ye kyu N: Vo mujhe pata hai ki tumhe milk pasand nhi hai so while you will give me piggyback ride, i will make you eat this ok M:( excitedly ) done Manik made nandini sit on his back and nandini fed him sweets and chocolates time to time. After sometime nandini sense that manik is tired so she stopped him and made him sit on the dining table N: Monkey Ill be back you sit here ok Manik hmmed After some time nandini came back with wine and glasses M: Nandini ab ye mat kehna ki tumhe monkey ke saath wine bhi peeni hai M: Nandini ab ye mat kehna ki tumhe monkey ke saath wine bhi peeni hai N: yes monkey you are right so chalo now be a good boy M: Yaar nandu mai iss monkey ki costume me wine peeta hua aacha nhi lagunga. Kitna awkward lagega. No i won't do this N: (cutely) Monkey please na please its my wish to drink wine with a monkey M: Tumhari choice ko kya ho gya hai. In your whole life you have choosed only one thing which is right N: what M: me. Mere alava tumne kuch aacha choose hi nhi kiya N:(irritating ) shut up monkey now come and drink this with me And again manik has no choice left so he came and sat infront of her and they both had wine. N: Monkey you must be tired na M: Agar is baar tumne mujhe milk pilaya na toh mai yeh monkey wala natak abhi khatam kar dunga N: Are no no i think that you must be tired with this so, i want you to change the costume and take some sleep M:(excitedly) sacchi N: mucchi Manik came near Nandini and kissed her cheek tightly and went to the room to change. Later in the evening N: manii wake up M: no nandu let me sleep i am very tired N: acha ok pehle kha lo fir so jaana M: ok Manik and Nandini came downstairs and started eating food. After it manik was about to go back when nandini stopped him and said N: manu listen maine na tumhare liye na ek cake banaya hai M: wow impressive but kis khushi me N: Vo tumhe na aaj meri wish poori kari iss liye. Now come and have it M: wow this is so tasty M: wow this is so tasty Manik and Nandini had their cake withlots of love, teasings and kisses + End of flashback N: Manik that was so much fun na M: haa haa fun toh hoga hi par sirf tumhare liye kyuki monkey toh mai hi bana tha na N: aacha na theek hai and now my all wishes are complete M: Finally last wish check To do it with a stranger

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captain-unlikelynutbouquet-blog · 6 years ago

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