#thank u for ur input <-about 2 go crazy
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Leaked atsv scenes trust me (part 2)
My humor is still lacking
#ME WHEN I FIND ANOTHER PERSON WHO GETS IT AND FURTHER ENCOURAGES MY BRAINROT#anyway sorry tumblrstranger but im very abnormal about them and if i dont celebrate every chance i get id explode#or be diagnosed with something#thank u for ur input <-about 2 go crazy#ANYWAY FIC UPDATED LETS GOOOOOOO#SO SO INSANE ABOUT IT IM GOING TO TAKE A BEAUTIFUL LOOK AT THE MOON AND APPRECIATE MY BEAUTIFUL LIFE AND FRIENDS#GRRRRR
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Can you please write about a threesome w nahyuck... I can imagine like donghyuck being ur bf but jaemin kinda finds you hot so one day u three are alone in the dorms and... they end up spit roasting you or some crazy shit like that lol THANK U I LOVE UR WORKSSS
TITLE: SPIT GONE WRONG
PAIRINGS: DONGHYUCK X READER X JAEMIN
GENRE: Fluff
WARNINGS: None.
A/N: This has been in my drafts for months but I really like this combo and concept, so these two may become a regular together. Wasn't sure if I should include smut in here so a part 2 is coming soon...
"Ew," you say as you set your things down on the counter. Shifting your eyes towards the member in front of you you cringe. "This isn't even your dorm why are you here?"
Donghyuck's eyes peirce yours with irritation.
"I should be asking why your here?" He throws back making you fiddle with your fingers as your gut wrenches.
"Jaemin's my friend, a better friend then you ever were," you pause. "And your my boyfriend."
A hand flies to his chest as he closes his eyes.
"Went to far," he grasps out.
"Shit, sorry. I got to into it," you confess wrapping around the counter to peck his lips. "How are you? Where is Jaemin, anyways?"
"Right here, watching you guys roleplay... Again," he sighs out pushing you to the side, fingers lingering, to get to the fridge.
You lift you head towards him making eye contact as you wrap your arms around your boyfriend!Donghyuck putting your head against his chest watching the other.
"You should join sometime, its really eventful," the older boy says.
Jaemin eyes you both in disbelief as he closes the door and begins to walk out of the kitchen muttering something you couldn't hear.
"What was that?" You ask loudly.
"You both disgust me," Jaemin rasps out, heading into his room.
Gripping Donghyuck's hand, you both follow after the youngest as he sits in his chair facing his computer.
Taking a seat on the bed your boyfriend sits on Jaemin's lap as he gets a game ready to play. His arms wrapping around the others neck as he let's a pout spread across his face.
"I want to play too," he whines kicking his feet a bit.
You smile at his antics while Jaemin barely flinches, being use to this type of behavior. Even though, you were also familiar with this side as your boyfriend was a playful kid at heart, it never fails to spark an excitement within you.
Pushing yourself off the bed you wrap your arms around the youngest neck as his game continues to load.
"Me too! Can I please, please, please play?" You beg shaking the chair.
Jaemin let's out a sigh and closes his eyes.
"You don't even know how to play," The youngest states.
You scoff.
"Maybe, I want to learn. I didn't say anything when I taught you how to properly cook," you shoot back. A defensive tone overtaking you as you step back.
Donghyuck scrunches his face.
"You taught Jaemin how to cook?" He interjects.
"Not really, she just tried to teach me to use measurements," he grumbles as he clicks the keys on his keyboard.
"Nobody uses measurements," Donghyuck insists.
"I do!" You argue.
"The more reason why you don't cook," your partner says, letting go of Jaemin's neck.
Eyebrows furrowing together you open your mouth to respond but Jaemin beats you to it.
"Don't tell me you're the type to read at parties," Jaemin snickers.
Your lips seal together in guilt as you slump on the bed.
"Unfortunately, she is," Donghyuck confesses for you.
You feel your face heat up as your boyfriend outs to your friend. He was suppose to be on your side, or so you thought. With Donghyuck there was no telling what he was planning on doing in any situation.
"It was one time!" You input loudly of the cars racing on Jaemin's computer.
"Pfft," he waves you off. "Sometimes I forget just how much you act like a grandma."
You purse your lips as you suppress a smile.
"Sometimes I really wonder how you were the fastest out the millions of sperm," Jaemin ponders.
Donghyuck howls in laughter.
"Ha. Ha. Ha. So funny, let's all just roast, y/n today," you mock standing up to occupy yourself.
Fixing the blanket you hear your boyfriend sober up as he begins to talk.
"No, but really sometimes you do the most oldest shit," he admits.
Dropping the pillow on the bed you turn with your hands on your hips.
"Like what?" You question, truly confused.
"You schedule when we have sex," he points out.
"Schedule your sex?" Jaemin questions.
You spin on your heel and pick up the pillow putting it in place. When he says it out loud you can't help but think how ridiculous that sounds. You'd assume not many people should have to schedule their sex lives or even think out it as an option (unless you're trying to get pregnant).
"I mean we- we have busy schedules," you defend.
"Wait, you schedule when you have sex?" Jaemin repeats in a louder tone. "What else do you do really? Hold on-," he gets up from the chair, shoving Donghyuck off, grabbing his phone.
Sitting down for the third time you lift your hands as Jaemin points his camera at you.
"What are you doing?" You shriek as the light to his camera go off.
"Seeing if I can photo shop a better personality for you," he speaks with a shrug of his shoulders.
You gasp out loud as the oldest once again trembles in laughter.
Jaemin smiles at his joke as you launch for him having enough of their jokes.
"You guys suck.. Big time," you express hanging on Jaemin's back, ignoring the tightness of his grip on your thighs.
#kpop#nct#nct dream#kpop imagines#kpop reactions#nct dream imagines#haechan#haechan imagines#haechan fluff#nct dream fluff#jaemin imagines#jaemin fluff
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My roommate has been commiting auto insurance fraud for the past 7 years. She registered her car in Georgia even though she's been living, working, and driving in NYC for the past 7 years. Somehow the auto insurance company found out. In NY auto insurance rate fraud is I THINK a federal offence now. So I told my roommate that even though they can proove she's been living and working in NYC for the past few years they can't proove that her car has been here the whole time too. So she should be a-ok and not worry, right? Obviously they will make her start paying nyc rates, but since they can't make her pay for the past 7 years because proof of employment and living here doesn't proove she's been driving to work every day here too right?""
Who has the cheapest auto insurance?
I'm about to come back from active duty overseas and I just bought a 2004 Ford F150 4x4. I'm 28 and havent had any accidents or driving infractions in the past 5 years. Which provider is generally the best to use? Thanks.
What is the best car insurance provider for young drivers?
I have recently passed my driving test, and was wondering which car insurance provider is cheapest as most of them seem to be very expensive!""
How much would i have to pay extra on my car insurance if i added my 18 year old son?
he jus got his license a few days ago?
Can I pay a AAA Auto Insurance bill online?
I'm in California but I don't know if that makes any diffrence.
Car Insurance?
anybody know what the Uk cheapest car insurance for somebody with 15 years no claims discount car engine size 2.8cc?
Will insurance cover girlfriend who lives with you?
My boyfriend and I live together and are going to get married within the next year or two (i am in nursing school and want to finish before getting married so we can afford a really nice wedding). He has United Health Care insurance and I've tried to find info online but cannot find the info i'm needing. He has this insurance through his employer. Can I be covered on his insurance without us being married? I see online you can do a family plan, but that's all i see. doesn't say if non-married couples can be covered.
Do you think my dad is paying to much for insurance?
my dad is around 44 years old and he has never been in a car accident. He has gotten tickets from when he was 19 years old. He has California casualty and he has been with them for years, we live in oregon. He has a 2006 toyota tundra darrel waltrip edition 4.7l v8 valued around 20k. He told me he pays around 100 a month for full coverage. We have 2 cars on his insurance, toyota, and my eclipse. Iv never gotten any tickets(dont know if that would affect it). THE reason i ask this is because my bf's dad just got a 2006 mustang gt and they said they only pay 76$ a month. So im just curious, Do you think my dad is over paying?? THANKS""
Car insurance for a beginner driver?
how much do you guys reckon it will cost a total new driver (17, male) to insuare either: mark 2 golf mark 2 golf gti any VW corrado thanks""
Repair cost for rear view mirror?
I broke someones rear view mirror. If I don't have to go through my insurance company I'd rather not. About how much does it cost to replace them? I don't know the make or model of the car.
Teen and Parent car insurance?
Im 19 year old female learning to drive, i want to drive my dads car so i can get more practice. People keep telling me different prices so how much would this cost roughly to be added to my dads insurance?""
How is California's New Auto Insuranse Law Enforced?
The state of California has closed a loop hole in the law that allowed people to register their cars with phony insurance or to register with good insurance and cancel a short time afterward. Now when you cancel your insurance, the insurance company will notify the DMV electronically and you car's registration will be revoked? What happens afterward? You still have the valid looking sticker on your car...so Are police going to be stopping you now just to check for insurance? How do you get your registration re-instated if revoked under these conditions?""
WHERE IN THE UK DOES CHEAPEST CAR INSURANCE AT THE MINUTE?
WHERE IN THE UK DOES CHEAPEST CAR INSURANCE AT THE MINUTE?
Does insurance go up for out of state speeding ticket?
I hae a New York drivers license, i was pulled over going 45 in a 30.....$150 ticket....................i looked it up and i know i do not get points on my record, but does my insurance go up? does anyone knoow and have a good source they can provide? Thanks""
Insurance and pregnancy...
I am planning to get pregnant in March, 2009. After working things out with my husband, it seems like the best time for us Anyway, my insurance policy will finish in August and I'll have to get new insurance (I won't be able to continue with my current insurance policy for reasons beyond the scope of this question). Will this cause me problems with the new insurance company (I still don't know what insurance I am going to purchase)? Will the NOT cover my pregnancy and delivery and consider it a pre-existing condition? What's your advice? We really don't want to postpone pregnancy any more and now is not the best time for us""
How much does Dental Insurance Cost in Chicago Illinois. ?
What type of insurance? What insurance provider? My teeth are in pretty good shape, my wisdom teeth are gone and i don't need braces. I want a policy that covers me for the basics like checkups / cleaning / cavities. I would like it to be able to see the dentist near me and have 80% or better covered by insurance. Where should i go? Thanks in advance.""
Advice on teen car insurance ?
I'm 18, from Ontario and have had my G2 for over a year now. I was in a deathly car accident in january on the highway because of really bad weather conditions, I'm lucky to be okay. The cop didn't charge me because the weather was so bad and there were a number of car accidents that week. However the insurance company faulted me because I spun out first. Its been 2 months and my dad has done nothing but complain about his car being wrecked. He blames me 100% for the accident even though I hit black ice and there was nothing I could do, and he wasn't even there... For my 18th birthday my grandad (his dad) is giving me $10,000 for a car. My dad is making him wait to give it to me and he won't take me car shopping ! And when I do get one he's not putting me under his insurance ! I have to insure my own car at 18 with only a part time job. Is this unfair? Not being able to drive has been a huge hassel. What are the cheapest cars to insure ? I can drive standard so there's no limitations. What's the best insurance companies ? How much do you think it would be ? Also I'm going to college in Florida next year on an athletic scholarship so what is insurance like down there ?""
Why do people buy insurance?
is it for saving or protection of life? What are the reasons that motivate people to buy insurance?
Auto insurance for 22-year-old.?
I'm considering getting a '96 Toyota Camry this summer. Do you think that it will be expensive to insure this particular vehicle? A little more information about me, i'm 22, and I got my license about a year ago, and I live in the Washington D.C. area.""
How much a month for loan and insurance for a 350z?
Ok so I'm gonna be 20 in a couple months and I'm tired of driving my crappy integra. I've been saving up and I'm set on getting a 350z. My price range is about 12,000 tops. If I put a down payment of about 5 or 6 grand how much would I pay per month for the loan. And how much would I pay a month for the loan along with the insurance. I'm on my parents plan. I don't know much about interest rates. Can you give me estimates on different lengths of loans and interest rates Thanks ily""
EX(executive) class model car insurance?
Is it true EX class model car have higher insurance rate? I want to buy an honda accord 2000 EX.
Where can i get on birthcontrol cheap and without insurance in dc or md?
I really need to get on birthcontrol and i'm looking to get on the pill. i need something affordable and i dont have insurance. I also go to school in a different state than where i live so i would need to get it comehwere that allows me to pick it up from different pharmacies depending on where I am at the time.
Do I need to include a speeding ticket that got reduced to a moving violation on a new insurance policy?
I am trying to get a quote for insurance and it asked if I have had any tickets. i did get pulled over and got a ticket once, but I had a lawyer get it reduced to a moving violation so it wouldnt affect my insurance at the time. do i need to mention it when i try to get insurance somewhere else?""
Where is the best place to get an auto insurance quote?
Where can I get a free auto insurance quote?
Old car insurance help?
just bought a new car and part exchanged my old one but the old one still had some months of insurance, can i get my money back for the un-used months? this ill help fund the new car's insurance""
Need help on car insurance for young driver?
Hi! I've been struggling to get a good quote for car insurance for a while now. I tried all the big name comparison sites and every one is quoting me 4k (monthly installments). I opted for third party and theft, i am 22 years of age and my postcode starts with sl1 (slough) and i got pass plus and had my licence (manual) since march 2011. I got my car already its a Peugeot 206 1.6l petrol manual 1999 3doors. If you have time you can try for yourself with the above details the quote is freaking too much. Is this just how it is or am i doing something wrong? If you can point me to the right direction that would be amazing!!""
Can I still own a car but without insurance?
I'm moving out, my car insurance is at 361.00$ a month now and I wont be able to afford rent and that. Is there anyway to either not have any insurance at all or just some sort of just minimal coverage?""
Can I get insured for a Volkswagen Golf GTI? (i'm 18)?
Hi! I wanted to buy the new golf gti, and I was wondering how much insurance would cost. What do you think will be cheaper, insuring the golf, or importing a car from another country (i won't have to buy it- i'll just take one of my parents' cars. Please don't say you won't be able to afford it etc. Trust me, I can afford it. Full stop.""
Occasional Driver Insurance.?
My had has 02 Mazda under his name as a First Driver and Insured. I got my G2 License Dec 11 and i have been using the car ever since ~ 40-100KM a week. I am not insured in any way. I got a Left-Turn Signal Ticket and the COP did not say anything. I got stooped 2 other times driving a work car not in my name and they did not say anything. Is it safe for me to drive like this. I have been told by some family member that i have to be listed as a Second Driver. Whats the benefit on this? I am 22 years old. Would it cost a lot to get Insured?
Current or prospective vehicle insurance?
i was preapproved for financing a used vehicle; they want me to bring in proof of insurance when i close loan. does this mean my current insurance on the vehicle i wont be using anymore or for the new one that i dont own yet
Is it against the law to drive without insurance?
Been driving for 30years clean here in Canada with know accidents, until I got into my first incident a few years ago, my insurance went up more then doubled!!, The insurance company RBC didn't want to forgive me on my first accident told me I had too wait 6 years, I I feel this is extortion, Im almost tempted to drive with out insurance is this recommended?""
""Am I paying too much for auto insurance, or is it average for my age range?""
Insurer: GEICO Premium: $240/month (6-month policy, includes collision and comprehensive w/ $1,000 deductible) Gender: Male Age: 20 (almost 21) State: FL Driving for: 5 years Accidents/tickets: None Vehicle Type: SUV Vehicle Year: 1995 Supposedly, my premium is supposed to go down when I turn 25, at least that's what GEICO said. The other companies are just as expensive. What are your thoughts?""
Will insurance cover girlfriend who lives with you?
My boyfriend and I live together and are going to get married within the next year or two (i am in nursing school and want to finish before getting married so we can afford a really nice wedding). He has United Health Care insurance and I've tried to find info online but cannot find the info i'm needing. He has this insurance through his employer. Can I be covered on his insurance without us being married? I see online you can do a family plan, but that's all i see. doesn't say if non-married couples can be covered.
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/tip-cheap-car-insurance-drivers-points-patrick-rice/"
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Your Friday Morning Roundup
Put aside the protests and the Zeke Elliott situation, actual NFL football returned last night. And it was fun to watch if you hate the Patriots.
The Andy Reid-led Chiefs took care of the defending Super Bowl champs, 42-27. That’s the most amount of points the Pats have given up under Bill Belichick. And Reid did a really good with time management? Weird world.
Anyway, Alex Smith, who could be entering his last year as the team’s starter with Patrick Mahomes behind him, went 28-for-35 with 368 yards passing and four touchdowns. Rookie running back Kareem Hunt had himself a night after fumbling his first carry in the NFL. He ran for 148 yards on 17 carries with a touchdown, and also caught five passes for 98 yards and two scores. He set an NFL record for yards from scrimmage in the first game of his career with 239. The Eagles play the Chiefs in KC next Sunday.
Tyreek Hill made seven catches for 133 yards and a touchdown, but left the game in the fourth quarter with cramps.
Star safety Eric Berry was carted off the field after suffering an Achilles injury. Looks like it could be a tear.
#Chiefs coach Andy Reid said star S Eric Berry has a potential Achilles tear. They'll know more tomorrow… but horrible news after a big W.
— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) September 8, 2017
Tom Brady went 16-for-36 with 267 yards passing, and Mike Gillislee scored all three of New England’s touchdowns on 45 yards rushing.
Andy Reid put up 42 points and 536 yards on the Super Bowl champion Patriots. My god. Next week should be fun.
The Roundup:
Eagles’ owner Jeffrey Lurie held an impromptu press conference where he discussed clickbait, Kelly Green jerseys (better happen), and having dinner with Andy Reid.
The Eagles also unveiled their new hype video for the season. Thumbtack. Thumbtack. Thumbtack. Kyle ranked all the yearly hype videos. If you give a crap, here’s mine:
5. 2016 (solely because it included St. Joe’s Prep, my high school’s (La Salle) archrival
4. 2014
3. 2015
2. 2017
1. 2013
Tim McManus went on a car ride with Carson Wentz and asked him a few questions.
Zach Ertz is going to break out this year, finally, and more valuable fantasy advice from fantasy guru Jim.
Alshon Jeffery’s cleats are fire.
These are the personalized "AJ XIII Cleats" Alshon Jeffery will be wearing this weekend #Eagles http://pic.twitter.com/mkqweL0uWy
— Eliot Shorr-Parks (@EliotShorrParks) September 7, 2017
He also won’t chirp at Josh Norman on Sunday.
Finally, check out Sean’s first Eagles Mailbag post.
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Some not-so-good news regarding Joel Embiid from Howard Eskin on 94 WIP yesterday:
“He’s not ready for five-on-five play, according to the Sixers. But what I understand is, his agent wants a new contract before he — remember he’s eligible to get a new deal. Now, if you’re the Sixers you can’t give him a max deal until you see that he can play, how many games he can play during the season.
“But my understanding, part of the reason that they’re saying — whoever it is that is saying that he’s not ready for five-on-five play, is because — and Joel Embiid, I don’t think worries about the money, but they listen to their agents. And the agent wants a new contract.”
Brett Brown on WIP – article from Liberty Ballers – said Eskin’s report is BS.
Training Camp will take place from September 26 until September 29 in Camden. One practice per day.
Amir Johnson said some more promising things about Ben Simmons after a community event at the Strawberry Mansion PAL Center:
Was going back over Amir's comments from today.
There was also this: "I truly believe that Ben is going to be the future of this league."
— Brian Seltzer (@brianseltzer) September 7, 2017
Did we see a glimpse of a new red jersey yesterday? Our good friend Conrad Burry made some predictions:
Took a stab at some predictions…I actually don't mind the wacky art deco font. Maybe it'd be alright if they re-drew it cleaner. http://pic.twitter.com/KASlHlRLMS
— Conrad Burry (@conradburry) September 7, 2017
To add to the intrigue, CEO Scott O’Neil gave some input about the funky 70s wordmark in a Tweet two years ago:
I actually like those u? https://t.co/S9Nh0UY6TR
— Scott O'Neil (@ScottONeil) April 17, 2015
EuroBasket updates:
FINAL: 107 – 69
Saric – 22MIN / 18PTS / 10REB / 3AST
— Philadelphia 76ers (@sixers) September 7, 2017
Furkan Korkmaz (Turkey) got a rebound in eight minutes of play in Turkey’s loss to Latvia.
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The Phillies played a game last night as well. They lost to the Nationals 4-3.
Odubel Herrera extended his hit-streak to 20 games, and Jorge Alfaro hit his second big league homer. Aaron Nola gave up three runs on seven hits in 5.1 innings.
Phillies and Nationals do battle again tonight at 7:05. Jake Thompson takes the mound for the Phils against Max Scherzer. God bless.
Scott Kingery and Tom Eshelman were the recipients of this year’s Paul Owens Awards, given to the team’s top minor league player and pitcher.
Meanwhile, former pitcher Brett Myers has a new music video. Not gonna lie, he’s kind of good. Him and Kyle had a weird Twitter exchange:
Thanks… wasn’t bashing you (really). Just not my scene. The song itself isn’t bad
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
Maybe u should come down and hang and see how we have a good time then u might change ur mind
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
Can we talk about the girl in the Yankees shirt though?
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
I didn't like that either but I don't tell them what to wear…she was actually there to keep an eye on my youngins while we shot the video
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
Fair enough.
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
By the way it's at 2300 views and climbing..I just released it at 11pm last night but thanks to u it's gonna keep going up! Seriously thanks
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
By the way just to correct u on the Military issued Belgium Malinois…the dog is actually a German Shepherd…he wants to meet u http://pic.twitter.com/FlYi8vnPF9
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
He should take that as compliment!
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
No he doesn't he's not Belgium he's German! lol Shepherds are larger than the malinois
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
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The Flyers officially announced their training camp would open up next Friday in Voorhees. A complete roster is attached.
—
Villanova head coach Jay Wright unveiled Nova’s tribute patch to Rollie Massimino.
In honor of those who came before us… http://pic.twitter.com/xskiNw3AdC
— Jay Wright (@VUCoachJWright) September 7, 2017
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In other sports news, the Cleveland Cavaliers officially introduced Isaiah Thomas, Jae Crowder, and Ante Zizic after acquiring them from Boston. Sam Hinkie also broke his short Twitter silence, retweeting “Isaiah’s” Players Tribune piece:
Real talk. So good. https://t.co/FvWBekIsdL
— Sam Hinkie (@samhinkie) September 6, 2017
Roger Goodell says he’s not a “football expert” on a show nobody watches. I’m not kidding on that second part either:
Source (who or may not be based in Bristol, Conn): The debut of FS1's "First Things First" had a 0.0 rating in 46 out of 56 metered markets.
— John Ourand (@Ourand_SBJ) September 6, 2017
Oregon’s football uniforms for Saturday that were designed by young cancer survivors is fantastic.
"I really think that this is the most important uniform Oregon has ever worn." – Todd Van Horne, Nike Creative Director #StompOutCancer http://pic.twitter.com/8jXgHBObgG
— Oregon Football (@oregonfootball) August 24, 2017
The Browns continue to Brown:
UPDATE: Myles Garrett has been diagnosed with a high ankle sprain. His status will be updated in a couple weeks. http://pic.twitter.com/YvBM4HXnPc
— Cleveland Browns (@Browns) September 7, 2017
Officially, #Browns coach Hue Jackson says S Calvin Pryor is being released for "an "internal matter." Crazy, days before the opener.
— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) September 7, 2017
Free agent kicker Josh Brown has been suspended six more games for domestic violence. He was suspended for one game last year.
Lenny Dykstra is trying to get with Lena Dunham, apparently.
Ohio State will wear LeBron Soldier cleats for their game against Oklahoma Saturday night.
An African World Cup qualifier is getting replayed after a referee from the match was issued a lifetime ban by FIFA.
Tweet of the year:
Should've named it Hurricane Roberto Aguayo. Would've missed Florida wide right and sailed right into the Atlantic
— LiTiRilla (@LiTiRilla) September 5, 2017
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In the news, the lawsuit that wanted parking on the Broad Street median has been thrown out and can’t be refiled. Great move by the judge.
Meek Mill explains how much Allen Iverson meant to the city of Philadelphia.
Equifax says about 143 million customers may have been affected by a cyberattack.
Kyle: FUCK EQUIFAX. Seriously. Fuck them. You lose the social security information for HALF of America? Worse, three of their executives sold their stock the days before this came out. How is that legal? The whole credit industry is such a farce. I spent a full year before we bought our new house playing their game, trying to get my credit one level up to save on my mortgage. Opening new lines of credit �� I didn’t need – and strategically making purchases and paying them right away all because an algorithm liked it. Worse, there are multiple algorithms depending on the type of credit you’re seeking, so the number you get in your report isn’t what most creditors see unless you pay more for the industry-specific scores – which I did – adding to the mysterious nature of it all. Who would’ve thought that a few agencies having the most important data for all functioning adults in the country could be dangerous? Now some hacker has all of my info – and yours, too! – and Equifax just shrugs about it. Meanwhile, God help you if you missed a student loan payment in 2014 and want a good mortgage rate. Seriously, fuck them. Fuck that whole industry.
Amazon is looking for a location for their second North American headquarters. Mayor Jim Kenney, with puns, has one suggestion:
We think Philadelphia would be a PRIME location for Amazon that would make people SMILE! Look forward to submitting a proposal! https://t.co/l60Wn5BVdg
— Jim Kenney (@PhillyMayor) September 7, 2017
Your Friday Morning Roundup published first on http://ift.tt/2pLTmlv
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heyyyy thanks for answering! i really enjoyed reading your take on these guys. sorry it's taken me several days to get to this! last time i got into a discussion like this it took me hours to write my response and i had Big Test coming up and also an essay that i didn't write yet so i haven't been able to give this post my attention until now!! (i literally didn't even read your response, i just kept it in my drafts for days bc i knew i'd immediately start typing up my response, and i needed to STUDY)
anyway, in short: i see where you're coming from, but i still don't agree. you are, of course, 100% entitled to ur opinions and ur interpretations of ed and izzy's relationship, but the way you read some scenes is very different from how i do, which directly contradicts your claim that "izzy likes ed, not blackbeard" is confirmed by the text.
and, because i also like to present arguments at length, i am going to elaborate!!
first thing's first: im taking a lot of this from the posts u linked, not from this post itself, but i feel like ur interpretation of how blackbeard's crew was run before the show starts takes a lot of things that were said in the dialogue at face value. i'm not gonna say you're wrong because i definitely think your interpretation is plausible! it's not how i personally imagine things on Queen Anne's Revenge, but as of right now all we have are characters' behaviors and a few lines of dialogue to try and picture how the past several years (decades?) have gone. we could look to real-life pirate history for ideas, but considering the way this show treats historical accuracy, i'm not inclined to use that as a blueprint. so it's kinda hard to say either way.
but as an example of where we disagree on pre-canon stuff, there's your take on the "I’ve massaged this crew when they were worried about your judgement" line:
Izzy means and Edward hears: “I’ve kept the money flowing and the supplies stocked. I’ve talked up your reputation and mystery. And I’ve immediately and effectively disciplined anyone who was stupid enough express doubts."
Edward’s response in this conversation is a mocking “Sounds stressful, Izzy” because he’s already got what he thinks is a foolproof and brilliant plan (which he’s concealing to fuck around), so as far as he’s concerned, Izzy’s complaints are baseless and therefore he’s just bitching about doing his job.
i think these are both perfectly reasonable interpretations to make. again, we don't know a lot abt what life looked like for blackbeard's crew before stede. the only things we see him do before stede are just sit ominously in his cabin and smoke; izzy's the one who's going out and running errands (and whining about it). so maybe this is an accurate look at how their operation is run!! maybe izzy is the logic behind the blackbeard brand, taking ed's crazy ideas and making them actually work, making sure they have enough munitions and crew and whatnot. and maybe ed just kinda does whatever he wants with little to no regard for the logistics.
i don't think that's the case for two reasons: 1. izzy says blackbeard is the most brilliant sailor he's ever met, and in my mind this means that ed is fully capable of coming up with and executing some wild plans with minimal input, we just haven't seen ed giving piracy his full attention and 100% effort at any point in the show, and 2. what he says in the next scene when lucius is giving his countdown and izzy was trying to get stede to do captain shit:
"You wanted to be Blackbeard, this is what it's like[...] They're on us now. Time for a new idea, Stede. The crew's gonna die. Hurry, you're gonna lose all your men. It's all gonna be your fault. All of the men who trusted you. All their blood's gonna be on your hands. It's going to be your fault!"
and from the way izzy looks at ed in this scene (and the fact that the writers/showrunners/david jenkins/whoever chose to edit a second of his face into the middle of this rant), i don't think ed's just spouting dramatic bullshit to make stede panic. i think this is genuinely how ed feels whenever there's a situation where they actually have to come up with a plan. from how ed's described it, it sounds like blackbeard is such a feared name that as long as they just avoid european military ships, everything runs fine. and when they do get backed into a corner (like they are in this episode, albeit only bc ed made them fire on the spanish ship to save stede), izzy is instantly turning to ed for a plan. ed's plan to escape the spanish was flawed, but we... don't see izzy come up with anything better??? ed might spend most of his time these days just lurking in his cabin or whatever, but he's still the real genius behind the legend of blackbeard.
so, when izzy mockingly says "sounds strEssful, izzy," i don't think it's just bc he already has his own plan. i think he's mocking izzy's complaints bc izzy is exaggerating his own importance. i think at this stage in the game, blackbeard is such a legendary figure that izzy is like the ships that fly ed's flag: easily striking fear, obedience, and surrender without ed even being there. there's not a lot of "keeping money flowing and supplies stocked" that ed or izzy have to do, if they're running low on supplies they can just go raid a random ship and they'll surrender and give them everything. there's not a lot of "talking up ed's mystery" or "disciplining anyone who shows doubt" required because who would doubt blackbeard? (ivan voice: this is why you do not doubt captain blackbeard!)
and, because my personal interpretation of izzy and ed's backstory has them meeting when "blackbeard" is pretty well-established, in my mind this is probably how it's always been, more or less. maybe years ago, when ships didn't immediately surrender every time they flew his flag and not everyone had learned to fear blackbeard yet, izzy probably helped ed figure out plans and come up with new fuckeries, probably helped recruit new crew members and bully them into submission. but these days it's hardly a challenge, so ed is mocking izzy for complaining about how hard he works, when there's hardly anything izzy even needs to do.
anyway. that's not even what this ask was even about lmaoooo
the main gist of your argument, from what i gathered, is that ed and izzy act very casual around each other, so obviously izzy knows and gets along with ed, and he's not only in it for blackbeard (there's a second part of ur argument, and i will get to that later. much, much later). i get what you're saying, and i also agree that the way the two of them interact is very familiar and comfortable. however, i don't see all of those interactions as ed fully dropping the blackbeard mask. there are only a few times when ed and izzy interact and ed is more ed than blackbeard, and every time this happens, izzy is Not About It.
like, of course izzy knows that The Legendary Blackbeard is a myth made up of fuckeries. izzy isn't stupid. at least, not in the same comedic way where the crew of the Revenge fully believe ed has met the kraken, or where stede totally believed pete when he said blackbeard's head was made of smoke. izzy knows blackbeard is a human man. he knows his head isn't made of smoke. he knows ed can bleed (he's probably run ed through on several occasions). so he definitely knows ed isn't always violent, always bloodthirsty. he sleeps and eats and gets drunk and shits. he's a guy. but that doesn't mean blackbeard isn't real. izzy's seen him in action, seen him come up with brilliant ideas and get them out of tight corners for years. izzy says himself: he's honored to work for blackbeard, the most brilliant sailor he's ever met
so blackbeard is an incredible badass, genius sailor, and also a human guy, one that izzy works for. the thing with the "workplace comedy" aspect of this show, and the thing with captains and first mates, is that being on a pirate ship is not like clocking into the office. you're stuck in a wooden box with a bunch of other men for days and weeks (months?) at a time, you're gonna get cozy. captain and first mate, in my opinion, is inherently a more casual relationship than your usual boss and employee. there's gonna be some level of joking around and shooting the shit that isn't the norm for other jobs.
but in my opinion that doesn't negate any of how badass and notorious blackbeard is. izzy knows that the blackbeard who floats down from the sky surrounded by smoke and fireworks is also the blackbeard who gets tangled up in the harness. but he still came up with that idea, and used to to successfully raid god knows how many ships. so for izzy, by being able to call blackbeard by his real name is an honor. he's the only one who really gets to talk to ed.
it also doesn't mean that the two of them are actually emotionally close, or that they even really know each other that well outside of Being Pirates. this discussion started bc of my post where i was thinking about ed's "i don't have any friends" line. i elaborated on my stance more on that in the notes and also in this ask, and im just gonna copy and paste the last paragraph i wrote on that ask bc it basically sums up how i read ed and izzy, which of course forms the foundation for why i think izzy likes blackbeard more than ed:
i totally think they were closer in the past, but not in a friend way. they had each other's backs, they came up with plans, helped each other when they were wounded. but did they like, talk abt anything other than piracy? did they talk in depth abt their pasts? did they talk abt their interests? people can interpret this show however they want, but ed saying he doesn't have any friends makes me think that they didn't, or that if ed ever tried to, it wasn't received well (and i don't think that's entirely izzy's fault, ed's language can sometimes be hard to understand. but the point is that izzy didn't understand it, doesn't understand it, doesn't understand ed. not the way ed wants to be understood)
and when i look ed and izzy's interactions through that lens (that they're comfortable enough to whine to each other and maybe even tease each other a bit, but izzy still values ed for blackbeard more than as a person and a friend), i don't have a hard time reading their behavior in a way that still fits my interpretation. i'm not gonna talk abt every single time ed and izzy say words to or about each other in the show, but i am going to look at some of the scenes you specifically mentioned:
1. "Oh Edward, can't I just send the boys?"
short analysis for this one, bc i basically tackled this one a few paragraphs ago: i agree that this is a semi-joking little bit, where izzy is whining and ed is giving this task to izzy specifically bc he knows izzy's not gonna want to do it. that's some funny, friendly banter right there! imo tho it still fits with like, weird work friend whose personal life is a mystery to you
(and as for the bit you said abt izzy not meaning to lie to ed, i would be more inclined to believe that if it wasn't for the fact that he verbatim says "i explicitly told him... blackbeard requested your company." when izzy walks up to stede and says "my boss would like a word with you," i actually don't think he was trying to hide who his boss was. but when stede just brushes him off, i think he probably knows why he's being so dismissive, or at least suspects. i think the word choice in "so i'll tell my captain that you're declining then, yeah?" was more deliberate. and sure, maybe by the time he got back to the ship he'd forgotten the specifics of the conversation, but bc this is a fictional show where like, dozens of people choose exactly which words end up in the final product, i don't think it's a mistake for the writers to show us a scene where it's very clear that stede doesn't know who izzy's captain is, and then a few minutes later have izzy say "i explicitly told him... blackbeard requested your company." the writers want us to know that izzy is not giving a true account, and i think the writers were trying to show that that was intentional on izzy's part)
2. "Izzy, they've got a bird guy"
i will grant you that the imminent death of the approaching spanish warships was probably putting a damper on izzy's mood that day, but i'm not sure i'd believe that there's ever been a time when ed was excitedly showing izzy something non-pirate related and izzy was anything more than bored and tolerating of it, not without explicit proof from the show. i don't think ed would rlly be dissuaded from showing excitement abt weird shit just bc izzy wasn't into it; again, they're weird work friends who are friendly enough to tease each other, and this sort of interaction falls into that category, imo. also, we already know that izzy responding negatively to things does basically nothing to stop ed from doing them (up until episode 10, anyway, but that's another can of worms): sending izzy to chase after stede, firing on the spanish vessel, banishing izzy from the ship. hell, when ed pranked the Revenge crew with the little surprise fuckery, izzy did not seem that into it! but ed just kinda listens to izzy complain and then does what he wants anyway. so if he's all excited abt this crew they've invaded that are all grubby and covered in rope and have a bird guy, and this weird fancy ship full of so much useless junk, what does ed care if izzy isn't playing along? giggling and showing izzy the miniature ship model doesn't seem out of character for someone with that sort of casual relationship with izzy. i'll give you that this probably isn't the first time ed has excitedly shown some stuff to izzy, but it's also probably not the first time izzy's response was flat disinterest
3. Edward goes straight from the boat to a vent about his boredom and frustration.
ed also goes and tells stede, a man he's known for less than an hour and also might be planning to kill, that he's tired of being blackbeard. i know a lot of fans talk abt the love-at-first-sight, instant-best-friend thing ed and stede have going on in episode 4, but my personal take on ed's thought process in this ep is a little different from that. so in all honesty, it wouldn't surprise me if ed's been complaining about being bored for years. drunkenly whining to the guy sitting next to him at a bar. chatting with the racist captain of some british vessel before he has his men kill the guy. he's probably complained to izzy before! the only real difference is that stede's the first person who actually listened and didn't just, like, laugh or brush him off. because it's kind of a wild thing, to suggest that the legendary blackbeard retire. it's the first time ed's even heard of the concept. so it's hard to imagine that ed's opening up here with the hopes of getting any actual support.
basically, my take on this scene with izzy is that ed's just venting to the closest person, who happens to be the guy who won't stop nagging him abt some dumb shit like trying not to get killed by the spanish or whatever
4. Izzy's resignation
imo, izzy gets really mean here not because he "doesn't fear backlash," but because he thinks he's gonna die and ed isn't coming up with any sort of plan. and izzy doesn't start off mean in this conversation, either. he drags ed away and starts complaining abt how ed made him track down stede and attack the spanish, which, much like izzy complaining abt being sent to invite stede aboard, still falls under what i consider to be "normal pirate and first mate interactions." he only really starts getting aggressive and insulting as ed continues to brush him off and even mocks him ("kinda the job, they're pirates," "sounds strEssful, izzy," "that's blackbeard. i'm stede, remember?" and also just ed's expression this whole scene, the smug smirking and the exaggerated frowning and the very blatant lack of attention being given to what izzy's saying to him)
like, izzy isn't afraid of backlash because 1. his intention going into this conversation was not to call ed a twat, just to try and get ed to please focus on their impending doom (and also maybe he was already planning to give his resignation at that point, just... not so colorfully), 2. ed was seriously being a dick, so he got so riled up he wasn't thinking too hard about consequences, and 3. he literally thinks he's about to die. i don't care how legendary a pirate is, if one of them is laughing at me while enemy ships are chasing me down, i'd probably flip him off, too!
5. Edward is the one he apologizes to at the end of the episode, and stays for when asked.
you only mentioned this part in one sentence and you do not elaborate on it, but im going to because i have a lot to say about this scene and love saying words
the thing with this scene is it starts with izzy throwing his stuff into a dinghy. there's like, a million ways to read this scene, but as far as i can tell, he wasn't planning to speak to ed—although, idk, now that im really thinking about it, maybe he was loudly tossing his stuff in the hopes that ed would hear him and come down to chat. that's also possible. but did he have a plan for if ed didn't come talk? or was he just gonna straight-up leave? where was he gonna go? back to blackbeard's ship? or was he gonna look for a new job? did he think ed would try and find him again? izzy what was your plan here
im throwing out all these possibilities just to sort of reiterate my point that a lot of scenes between these two can be read in a myriad of ways. if i'm being honest, my read mostly leans towards "izzy was planning to leave without directly seeking out ed, but he was also trying to get ed's attention, and he was hoping ed would either tell him to stay, or would want him back if he left," even tho that kinda goes against my main stance that ed and izzy are not good friends and izzy doesn't like ed much as a person
because like, whatever izzy was hoping for there, he was at least going through the motions of leaving. and the reason for that is because now that they're not going to die, izzy is realizing, "oh shit, i called blackbeard a twat." whether or not he thinks ed is going to do something to him, he knows that he was in the wrong (which is debatable, bc ed was keeping izzy in the dark and kind of being a dick about it; i do think ed tried to reach out abt his plan with the whole frankfurter thing, but that can hardly be called "clear communication" and oh boy did this thought process spark one hell of a discussion while i was still writing this post), and he knows blackbeard doesn't let that kind of insubordination slide. it was pretty reasonable for izzy to assume he was about to be banised from the ship (aka pirate fired). obviously, when ed approaches him, he's gonna apologize. he doesn't say im sorry, but he does admit that he was wrong and take back the mean things he said. because now that he knows he's gonna live to see another day thanks to a frankly lunatic plan that ed (and stede) came up with at the last minute, it makes calling ed an "unpleasant shell of a man that's merely posing as blackbeard" seem. wrong. and regrettable.
you don't have to be someone's bestie to feel bad abt calling them a twat, is what im saying.
6. "Let me kill for you" conversation ladyluscinia's beloved
oof ok. so. i hope u don't take my read on this scene personally, because it's very much Not The Same as yours. and for a lot of other parts in this show where our reads differ, i can generally see why you'd think that way and i actually think there's a chance you might turn out to be right. but for this one, i can see why you'd read the scene this way, but i'm preeeetty sure you're wrong. my thoughts on this are pretty much summed up by this post, but i didn't make that one and i want to put my thoughts down in my own words, so.
i don't think izzy knows that ed doesn't kill.
to start, looking at the first paragraph you wrote after the heart emoji: you are correct, ed and izzy do not talk abt their emotions, at least not to each other. you are correct, whether or not they've talked about something is less important than their actions. however, by not talking about something, they do set up a lot of opportunity for miscommunication and misunderstanding. because here's the thing: Ed Does Kill. he very much kills people. he burnt a ship with the crew trapped inside (and so did stede, probably, but that's beside the point), there is zero doubt in my mind that more than one of those maims that ed was so fond of were directly responsible for those maimed peoples' deaths. ed was excited to see soap at the pirate rehab academy, ergo: pirate ships do not regularly carry soap (unsurprising). ergo: sepsis. also, blood loss? hell, there's a good chance ed's gonna talk about pushing lucius overboard like "if you think about it, the ocean is what killed him. or maybe some sharks."
ed "doesn't kill," just like ed "doesn't have friends." it's significant that both of these lines came from ed in the same conversation, and picking these two lines apart is essential to understanding ed. because you were right, ed definitely has had relationships in his life that most people would consider friendship. but to ed, curled up in stede's bathtub after sudden PTSD flashbacks, he wouldn't trust any of those people to see him in this moment. that's what he means when he says he has no friends. he doesn't have anyone he can fully trust to be emotionally vulnerable, to admit weakness to (not until stede, anyway; and i think it's telling that the only time ed calls someone his friend, he's talking abt stede. he calls calico jack his old mate. whether or not ed even means for there to be a difference between friend and mate, i think the writers made the difference in word choice very deliberately). so, in the same way, ed definitely has done things that most people would consider murder. im gonna nab a quote from that post i linked bc i rlly can't think of any better way to put it:
the only part of killing that ed abstains from, or can’t bring himself to do, is being physically and consciously present for the victim taking their final breath as the culmination of his violence
and in the next paragraph, you use the phrase "kill with his own hands" to talk about how ed manages to shrug off the blame, in his mind, for killing people. but like, ed killed his dad with some rope, not technically his own hands. so it's not the his hands that bother him, it's the directly seeing a person die from his actions. ed could tie someone to some tracks and blame the train for that person's death. ed could probably string a guy up by the neck, and as long as he was gone by the time he finally croaked, he'd say it wasn't his fault.
so then, i'm not sure how much this confession really puts izzy's action into a new light. izzy might have noticed that ed doesn't kill as often as the legends probably say, but he's definitely has seen ed kill. he's not making the same distinctions that ed is bc like, the only person making those distinctions is ed. to borrow a line from this great post, i think ed's learned "how to kill somebody but make sure they die a few steps/minutes later, when he’s on homebase and it doesn’t count or whatever." and even if izzy has noticed something, i think at most it's just that ed doesn't often kill people if it's not 100% necessary, or maybe that ed orders people to be killed more than he kills himself.
but you said yourself at the beginning of this post: izzy doesn't really relish in violence for the sake of violence—but he does relish in power, and violence is a very useful tool in getting and maintaining power. we see his love of power from the way he bites back his grin when ed implies that izzy would take over after his retirement, and the way he smugly sits in front of his new crew and just. eats. while being a weird dick to them. izzy wants to have power, and failing that, he wants to serve power (that's why, when they almost throw him overboard and then ed goes and sings sad songs in a robe, izzy tries his best to shut that shit down. but more on that later). and while he doesn't relish in violence, he does recognize that blackbeard's legend is entirely built on violence. he expects ed to perform a certain level of violence, but it doesn't actually have to be all that excessive
so, if izzy's noticed that ed has a habit of "outsourcing the big job" to izzy and the other crew members, it doesn't necessarily mean he's noticed a weakness. ed having his subordinates kill people for him is hardly weak, not when izzy 1. doesn't give that much of a shit abt ed being Super Violent Always, and 2. izzy has seen ed kill before (by normal people's definition of kill, not ed's), even if ed didn't stick around to see them draw their final breath (also 3. it gives izzy a chance to be closer to ed, but im gonna get to that in like, three paragraphs). if anything, ed walking away to leave someone to slowly bleed out from his wounds or die from an infection is probably seen as more violent and cruel than just pulling the trigger against someone's forehead. like, it is kind of badass to cut someone's limb off and just then walk away while their screams echo throughout the brig, eventually dying down as the blood loss slowly starts to take its toll.
also in this paragraph you said that izzy probably put "ed killed his shitty dad" together. honestly, i don't even think he needed to. there's a good chance ed would've told him that himself at some point, in a way that wasn't a tearful confession, but probably more drunkenly bragging. either way, though, it doesn't really matter, point is that izzy knows ed killed his shitty dad. and killing your shitty dad, in izzy's gritty world, is hardly weak. if anything, it just adds another layer to how badass he thinks ed is: he killed his dad when he was just a boy!
now: your next two paragraphs, aka the last two paragraphs where you discuss the "let me kill for you" conversation. like you said, ed hasn't killed stede yet, but izzy doesn't necessarily think the plan is off. izzy's also watched ed get excited abt tiny ship models. palling around with some rich weirdo for a little longer than they originally planned is hardly the weirdest thing ed's done. izzy's getting impatient bc it's been a while, and he was promised he was gonna get to be captain soon, and ed is not doing cool badass pirate things. izzy hates everything that's going on and he wants it to stop.
so he's trying to end this weird stint on the Revenge and start captaining his own crew. finishing the job himself will be the quickest way to get to that. and izzy, who is basically ed's errand boy, has probably killed dozens of people specifically on orders from ed that were given in private—because you're right, ed's job requires that everyone think ed is 100% willing to kill people. again though, izzy sees violence as a tool, one that he thinks ed is willing to wield with no restraints. it's gratifying to him when ed puts that tool in his hands, because it means ed trusts him, and it means ed is letting him closer than he lets anyone else.
so, like, in my opinion, izzy thinks ed is perfectly capable of killing stede. he encourages the whole fuckery (twice! once when stede firsts suggests it to ed, and again when stede is trying to call the whole thing off) specifically to give ed the opportunity! at most, he maybe thinks ed is a little more reluctant than usual, but that's probably just because of the whole "stede is ed's pet" joke they keep playing with this episode (and also he thinks ed and stede are fucking. homoerotic stabbing scene my beloved). like, up until ed kicks izzy off the ship, i don't think izzy realizes just how much ed cares about stede. he thinks stede is has been, like, a fun fling for a few days and that ed's gotten a little too attached, but he still thinks the plan is on.
and the biggest reason izzy offers to end it, aside from expedience, is that getting to be the one who puts down ed's pet would probably extremely gratifying to him. this goes hand in hand with your line that "This is another behind the curtain thing, just like using Edward's name or getting teased by him in private, and Izzy loves those things." like, for all stede's managed to hold ed's attention these past few days, stede would never be able to do this for ed (not in izzy's mind, anyway, who knows where they'll go with stede in the next season). like, tell me izzy wouldn't pop a boner from killing ed's two-week fling. he's a weird little freak who wants to own and by owned by blackbeard! he's five feet and [REDACTED] inches of internalized homophobia buried in layers upon layers of toxic masculinity! he sees ed and stede (and the crew of the Revenge) being happy and gay and having actual gay sex, not just subtextual gay sex, and he's like, "right, wots all this now." izzy hands doesn't fit in here, and more importantly, he doesn't fit with edward here.
killing ed's fling is not just about killing the guy who is taking ed's attention away from him. it's about killing the person ed is becoming around stede. and ed, for his part, likes who he's becoming. he likes telling ghost stories and dressing up all fancy and hanging around with this goofy blond guy. and izzy, for all he thinks he's seen behind the curtain, for all he thinks that he's special for getting to call him edward and getting to jokingly whine at him, has never seen ed act like this. he's never seen ed. the "behind the scenes" blackbeard moments that izzy were privy to were just a continuation of blackbeard, a piece of The Legendary Pirate that izzy was the only one special enough to see it. or so he thought
7. Episode 10 aka The Things I Said I'd Come Back To Talk About Later aka That's Right Baby I'm Still Fucking Going
in case you forgot (and i'm assuming you forgot, because holy shit has this thing gotten long, i've been working on this response for four fucking days), there were two spots where i said i'd come back to Some Subject:
the main gist of your argument, from what i gathered, is that ed and izzy act very casual around each other, so obviously izzy knows and gets along with ed, and he's not only in it for blackbeard (there's a second part of ur argument, and i will get to that later. much, much later)
izzy wants to have power, and failing that, he wants to serve power (that's why, when they almost throw him overboard and then ed goes and sings sad songs in a robe, izzy tries his best to shut that shit down. but more on that later)
guess what baby!!! it's later!!!!!!! and the subjects i'm coming back to are actually The Same Subject!!!!!!!!!!
so, the second part of your argument is about why izzy is Like That to ed in episode 10 (which makes sense, it's the biggest hurdle in your argument, just like the "i'll kill for you" scene is the biggest hurdle in mine). your take is that ed rejecting piracy, rejecting the life he had with izzy, is what makes izzy snap at ed. not the shaved beard, not the blanket fort, not the crying and eating marmalade straight out of the jar. and i hear what you're saying, but i think there's like, two things from the episode before that you're not considering
the first is that when ed signed the act of grace, izzy did not seem that sad that ed was gone. he was appalled that ed would "lick the kings boots" (kinda hypocritical, iz, they're only here bc you chose to work with them), but the next time we see him he's sitting in front of the crew of the Revenge and stuffing his face. the man does not seem to be bothered. not until they try to kill him, that is.
and the trying to kill him is the part that i really think puts izzy's behavior in episode 10 into perspective. izzy literally almost just died. the crew almost threw him overboard. the only reason he's still alive is because ed just happened to make it back aboard literally one second before it was too late. and even after signing the act of grace, even with his beard shaved, even sadly shuffling away like a toddler who's been sent to time out, ed's presence is enough for everyone to fall in line. yes, there's the initial shock of "holy shit, what happened to him?" but then, presumably, izzy goes back to being first mate? aka first in command, what with ed hiding in his room crying? even though literally everyone on the ship was about to kill him, they go right back to following orders. but only because ed came back
we don't see izzy taking care of ed while he's sobbing away in the cabin, but i agree that presumably, he was the one bringing ed the tea, food, booze, and marmalade. i don't know necessarily that izzy climbed into the fort (he could've just left it all outside) or offered emotional support (i. truly. cannot fathom. what izzy trying to give anyone emotional support. would look like), but he was at the very least keeping ed alive in there. because without ed, izzy's a dead man
and i also think this is why he tries so hard to cover for ed and keep the rest of the crew from asking questions. i don't think it's because he's trying to give ed space to "be sad for a while." i do think it's because this is his nightmare scenario for his No Feelings Allowed mentality. because for izzy, who is relying on ed's presence to keep him from getting thrown overboard, the things ed is doing are not worthy of respect. and what happens to izzy if the crew doesn't respect ed anymore? what then? if they're not worried about ed's reaction, what's stopping them from finishing the job and throwing izzy overboard while ed's not looking? yes, izzy is not being hostile to ed (not yet, lol), but that's because izzy's position on the ship at the moment is very, very precarious.
and the tipping point isn't even when this goes public. or at least, not fully. because yeah, izzy's face as ed is singing is... not approving. he very much looks like he wants to puke. but he lets it happen! he lets ed get out there and sing his weird sad song! and for all that he's not having a blast, he still jumps to "defend" ed from being disrespected. he hasn't given up on trying to keep ed's fearsome persona alive (because, again, without it, izzy is a goner).
the tipping point is ed saying he wants to be called ed, because i agree, he's saying that izzy isn't the only one he talks to anymore, izzy isn't the only one who sees behind the curtain anymore, izzy isn't special anymore. and the tipping point is also when ed says why are we even being pirates, because the only thing izzy knows is being a pirate (and arguably isn't even that good at it). so izzy, who needs ed to be bleackbeard, and needs blackbeard to need him, is losing the only thing keeping him alive (being ed's first mate) and the thing he prided himself on most (being the only one who "saw behind blackbeard's curtain," even though, like... did he?)
and your take at the end, about how izzy was lying when he said "blackbeard is himself again." i hadn't seen those scenes compared before, and i'll admit, it's a strong argument. there's a good chance izzy is lying in this scene, and he's regretting ever opening his mouth. if he is, i don't think that necessarily ruins my stance. ed did cut off izzy's toe and feed it to him. i wouldn't be surprised if izzy's hesitation is not about ed being too violent now (because ed's done the toe move on people before), but about ed being violent towards him
but also, these aren't the only two times we see izzy smile. the moment that sticks out to me is how izzy reacts when ed is telling him he's gonna make izzy captain when he "retires." he gets this giddy little grin that he seems to fight against very hard. and the way he very quickly tamps that smile down is very similar to the way he seems to try and repress his smile in the "blackbeard is himself again" scene. i could see this moment as izzy lying, but i could also see it as izzy riding the same giddy high of being blackbeard's right hand man, of being so close to power.
because the thing with the "izzy didn't want this" take is that. well. he makes that face in the toe scene. after the initial scream in pain, after the ed forces him to chew in swallow, izzy's fucking face when ed removes his hand, the reverence in the way he whispers, "yes blackbeard." like, seriously, go back and look at that scene, i swear to god for a split second his lips twitch into a smile. because izzy, insane fucking freak of a man izzy, is into it. he looks like he's experiencing divine intervention or some shit. yes, he also looks scared shitless, but con o'neill is way too talented for that reverent, hushed whisper to have been intended as just fear. and the directors and editors are too fucking good at their jobs for the shot to look like that. all zoomed in and dark. like, with the way con's tits are out, it looks like it could be a shot from a goddamn sex scene, if you ignore the blood (or maybe not, idk, having blood all over your mouth is kinda sexy)
anyway, IN CONCLUSION:
i think izzy is in love with who he thinks ed is, which is informed by the years they spent together while ed was still enjoying being blackbeard. i think that the tragedy of izzy is that he thought he was the only one who knew ed, but he didn't actually know him at all. the way ed goofs off in episode 4 makes me think this isn't the first time he's tried to show other parts of himself to izzy, but for whatever reason (either ed being very bad at opening up, or izzy immediately shutting down anything that wasn't Badass Macho Pirate stuff—or maybe some combination of the two), izzy and ed have never gotten along when ed isn't having fun being a pirate. thus, izzy is in love with blackbeard, not ed. he wants to blackbeard's right hand man, the only one who's allowed to see behind blackbeard's curtain. he doesn't want that with edward.
but that's all my opinion and interpretation!! i might turn out to be wrong!!! i don't think i am, but who knows!!!!! the part that i really am gonna make a firm stance on (and the whole reason i sent the ask in the first place) is that i just don't agree that "izzy only likes blackbeard not ed" is contradicted by the text the way you claim it is. it's not explicitly confirmed, either! i think that from what we know right now it's just heavily implied, but it's vague enough that it could go either way. the fact that i can very clearly look at the show through both of our viewpoints means that your specific take is not as textually supported as you think it is. which is literally fine, this is just a gay pirate tv show, who really cares (says the person who just wrote. So Many Fucking Words, lmao)!! we are all just here. talking abt pirates online. vibing.
thank u again for responding to my ask, i really had a blast reading your takes and then picking them apart mercilessly lol. boy howdy do i love thinking about this show! AND NOW IM GONNA GO WRITE MY ESSAY OH FUCK
wait hi it's me ourflagmeansgayrights messaging u from the main blog. i liked ur addition when u rb'd my post abt ed saying he doesn't have any friends, but i also saw ur tags and i would LOVE to hear ur tangent abt why the "izzy likes blackbeard not ed" interpretation is contradicted by the text. i've personally have been reading it that way, and most of what i've seen/heard abt ppl talking abt ed and izzy have been reading it that way, but i would rlly like to hear the other argument
Oh yes, @ourflagmeansgayrights . Absolutely. I love presenting arguments. (At length, as you will see 😅)
(Link to the mentioned post for reference)
Ok, so first, most important point - Edward is not a soft marshmallow center person whose true self is silk robes and sweets and singing. My first major meta for this fandom was an analysis of his character, which is pretty long but worth the read since that's where I'm coming from for ALL of this. (Also the skeleton of this whole analysis is in there too.) I'm going to use names the same way I did in that meta, where Edward is the real guy, and "Blackbeard" and "Ed" are both at least partially fake personas he's putting on. Got it? Ok.
Why Izzy Loves Edward (Not Blackbeard)
Obviously, Izzy does spend a lot of time propping up the unapproachable legend of Blackbeard, which is where I assume the idea he's fixated on it comes from. The thing is that this is what Izzy does in public, to other people, and it's kind of his job. Izzy in private is a different story.
---
Broadly, Izzy's approach to the Blackbeard mask is very similar to and informed by Izzy's general approach to violence. Unlike multiple other characters, including Edward, Izzy isn't much of a sadist. He treats violence as a tool he's very skilled with. Uses it with purpose. He isn't invested in keeping Blackbeard around because he thinks he's real. Blackbeard is a tool that, in Izzy's assessment, they very much still need (and one that can be put away when not needed).
"Blackbeard" isn't just a persona of Edward's, he's a fuckery that Edward and Izzy both have invested a lot into maintaining. A way to keep them in power and unquestioned for decades in a profession where slipping up can get you murdered by your own crew. Blackbeard is especially armor for both of them because Izzy and Edward both have personal issues that cripple their ability to lead alone, so they operate as a codependent unit instead. Edward is still an active participant in this unit and the abusive power structure it utilizes when we first meet him, almost certainly because he agrees with Izzy that the traditional "never let them see you weak" style of piracy is valuable.
So you can imagine that his decision to go all in on trading "Blackbeard" for "Ed" a month or so later sends Izzy into a panic (exacerbated by the fact that Edward has not communicated with Izzy for shit in that entire timeframe). That's what's blowing up in 1x10. It has nothing to do with hating Edward himself, because as far as Izzy is concerned Edward is not being the real Edward at the moment, and he's mostly right. In fact, the main reason it can all go so disastrously wrong is because Edward is still himself under "Ed", and fully capable of making his own terrible panic decisions when Izzy reality checks him and accidentally hits the worst possible sore point.
That's Izzy and Blackbeard. A public front of intimidation and awe that keeps anyone from getting close enough to hurt Edward or Izzy. But the benefit Izzy gets from helping keep all this up is that he's is allowed, encouraged, even entitled to go behind the curtain as he pleases.
So he does. And Edward is happy to have him there.
Izzy in public is way more casual with Edward than others are, doing things like being the only one allowed to use his name, but Izzy alone with Edward is on another level. He can't possibly think Blackbeard is real, because there is no way in hell he would interact this comfortably with Blackbeard.
One of their first interactions is Izzy getting an order and immediately whining "Oh Edward, can't I just send the boys???" And Edward teases him about it! He's not remotely mad or treating it like insubordination (probably because there is no question Izzy will get it done). It's a joke between them! Oh lol Izzy's gonna hate this! And while I do think Izzy deliberately doesn't try very hard because he thinks Stede is stupid, I don't think he's consciously plotting to lie to Stede and then Edward or even entirely aware he did so. Stede did shut down that interaction very quickly without getting all the information, and that's kinda on him.
In 1x04 we are seeing them completely out of sync, but also the episode is littered with echoes of intimacy. Edward's little "Izzy, they've got a bird guy" bit and showing him the boat with such enthusiasm are not habits that get ingrained if Izzy has never reacted positively to that kind of sharing in the past, even if he's too distracted by imminent death for fun right then. And Edward goes straight from the boat to a vent about his boredom and frustration.
On Edward's end of the conversation alone the timing is awful, he won't share his plan to assuage Izzy's worries about the imminent death problem to make the timing better, and his wording leaves a lot to be desired, but it's a very human emotional moment and he's not afraid of or concerned at all about sharing it with Izzy. He trusts Izzy. Unfortunately, both of them are kind of disasters at solving emotional problems on a good day, so Izzy is not exactly equipped to respond well and unsurprisingly fails to do so.
Later, Izzy pulls Edward away to talk alone and does his own emotional vent in the resignation scene, which is about the same level of successful communication as the last one - read: basically none - but, again, Izzy isn't afraid of backlash here. He's talking to Edward, not Blackbeard. He's always talking to Edward. Edward is the brilliant sailor he chooses to follow and the person he treats like an equal in personal matters. And Edward is the one he apologizes to at the end of the episode, and stays for when asked.
And I think the real evidence that Izzy is perfectly fine with the parts of Edward that aren't Blackbeard is in 1x06. ("Let me kill for you" conversation my beloved! 💓)
The thing is that Izzy is not an emotionally vulnerable person, and definitely not a talking about your emotional vulnerability kind of person. And to be honest, I don't really think Edward is either, he's just so desperate for something right now that he'll do it anyway. So whether or not they've talked about something is less important then their actions, and holy fuck does this episode imply some actions.
The reveal that Edward doesn't kill with his own hands throws a lot of Izzy's actions leading up to the duel into a new light, because I just don't see how Izzy could not be aware of that fact. He's Edward's right hand. He must have noticed, and Edward likely knows he did. In fact, if Edward makes a habit of telling the kraken story, I wouldn't be surprised if Izzy put "Edward killed his shitty dad" together too. And that knowledge adds a lot of context to what Izzy's doing, even if I can guarantee they've never talked about it.
Of course Izzy is unsurprised that Edward never killed Stede in his sleep and isn't taking a lack of action as a sign the plan is off. Of course he doesn't assume that the conversation is done when Edward agrees to kill Stede in front of Fang and Ivan. So he goes to Edward, alone, and he offers to take care of it. That's huge! If Izzy had objections to the real Edward then this should be a massive sticking point. He should be irritated that Edward is too weak to handle his own problems at best, and more likely actively pushing him to do so, but he's not! The only part of this that Izzy seems concerned with is making sure no one else knows, and that's a matter of common sense considering Edward threatens to kill people for a living.
Izzy doesn't mind at all that Edward can't kill like Blackbeard ought to. He's happy do it for him. Note this is a good time to remember that Izzy is not a sadist or particularly prone to violence as problem solving, meaning the "for you" bit is way more important than the "let me kill" bit. This is another behind the curtain thing, just like using Edward's name or getting teased by him in private, and Izzy loves those things. Like, to the point of jealously guarding them and getting real pissed that when he's being shut out, Stede is getting let in.
This is getting kinda long and I'd like to wrap it up today so I'm going to skip straight to 1x10.
I already touched on the blowup, but let's talk about before the blowup. Edward is a mess. He gets back to the ship, asks Izzy to bring him tea, and the next time we see him he's gone full breakup mode. He's been crying, the room is covered in booze bottles and marmalade jars, and he's in a blanket fort. I doubt there has ever been a moment in his life where he is less Blackbeard than that. And what is Izzy doing (at least before Edward takes his mess public)?
Well, freaking the fuck out, but also trying desperately to cover for him. That's it.
Izzy is the only one who has been seeing Edward. He has brought him tea, and food, and booze and marmalade. If Edward hasn't left that fort - and it sure doesn't look like he has - then I think it is entirely reasonable to assume Izzy crawled in there every day and offered the saddest attempt at emotional support you have ever seen in your life, all the way up until Edward requested Lucius. Pre-blowup there is nothing about Edward's demeanor that implies Izzy has been unpleasant or hostile to his grieving.
Izzy is full on panicking in a nightmare scenario for the whole "don't let them see you weak" mindset - a crew that is way too comfortable asking questions with nothing to distract them - and at the same time he's just supporting Edward as best he can while letting him be sad for a while. His best is pitiful, yeah, but does that sound like a man who can't stand the real Edward?
The tipping point is only when all this goes public. A clear violation of the established rules, a serious potential danger, and Edward casually makes it way worse when he drops the double hit of "Why are we even being pirates?" and stating he wants everyone to call him "Ed".
That's rejection with a blast radius.
That's "I'm unilaterally deciding everything we've built is worthless." That's "Everything you've done to try and maintain us was pointless." That's "Seeing behind the curtain isn't special anymore."
That's "You aren't special anymore, and I don't even care enough to notice I'm telling you this by accident."
"Ed" rejects Izzy, Izzy rejects "Ed", the "Ed" mask slips...
Eventually we end up with The Kraken.
Another major point that people use to say Izzy wants Blackbeard is that Izzy wanted the Kraken. Except he doesn't say that. His "threats" in the cabin confrontation are completely vague. He doesn't tell Edward what he wants from him beyond NOT this unrecognizable "Ed", or even what he would do if his explosion was ignored. It's not fundamentally different from the explosion in 1x04, and that's kinda the problem for Edward because 1x04 almost ended with Izzy leaving for good. Hello, freshly hurting abandonment issues! Ready to drive Edward to some really fucked up decisions?
And as far as Izzy's whole "Blackbeard is himself again" goes... The man is not exactly a good liar, and that is a really obvious lie.
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So yeah. Izzy is in love with Edward. I feel like the text makes it clear that Izzy values the fact that he gets to know Edward while everyone else is kept at bay by the Blackbeard persona, and Edward doesn't maintain any personal boundaries on his end that imply this intimacy isn't reciprocal.
They are in the middle of a depression spiral and contested divorce right now and not communicating for shit, and I don't think either of them was a talk through their feelings kind of person before, but there is a history of vulnerability and trust there. And not just on a professional level, though their jobs and lives are so intertwined that everything is a little work related.
They are a disaster, honestly, but I do love them so. Mutual toxicity and all. 💓
(Season 2 really needs to make these men talk to each other, though.)
#txt#meta#izzy hands#edward teach#mine#THANK U FOR RESPONDING BESTIE I HAD SO MUCH FUN WITH THIS POST#SORRY FOR. THE WORDS. BY WHICH I MEAN SORRY FOR THE AMOUNT OF THEM.#rb
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Your Friday Morning Roundup
Put aside the protests and the Zeke Elliott situation, actual NFL football returned last night. And it was fun to watch if you hate the Patriots.
The Andy Reid-led Chiefs took care of the defending Super Bowl champs, 42-27. That’s the most amount of points the Pats have given up under Bill Belichick. And Reid did a really good with time management? Weird world.
Anyway, Alex Smith, who could be entering his last year as the team’s starter with Patrick Mahomes behind him, went 28-for-35 with 368 yards passing and four touchdowns. Rookie running back Kareem Hunt had himself a night after fumbling his first carry in the NFL. He ran for 148 yards on 17 carries with a touchdown, and also caught five passes for 98 yards and two scores. He set an NFL record for yards from scrimmage in the first game of his career with 239. The Eagles play the Chiefs in KC next Sunday.
Tyreek Hill made seven catches for 133 yards and a touchdown, but left the game in the fourth quarter with cramps.
Star safety Eric Berry was carted off the field after suffering an Achilles injury.
Tom Brady went 16-for-36 with 267 yards passing, and Mike Gillislee scored all three of New England’s touchdowns on 45 yards rushing.
Andy Reid put up 42 points and 536 yards on the Super Bowl champion Patriots. My god. Next week should be fun.
The Roundup:
Eagles’ owner Jeffrey Lurie held an impromptu press conference where he discussed clickbait, Kelly Green jerseys (better happen), and having dinner with Andy Reid.
The Eagles also unveiled their new hype video for the season. Thumbtack. Thumbtack. Thumbtack. Kyle ranked all the yearly hype videos. If you give a crap, here’s mine:
5. 2016 (solely because it included St. Joe’s Prep, my high school’s (La Salle) archrival
4. 2014
3. 2015
2. 2017
1. 2013
Tim McManus went on a car ride with Carson Wentz and asked him a few questions.
Zach Ertz is going to break out this year, finally, and more valuable fantasy advice from fantasy guru Jim.
Alshon Jeffery’s cleats are fire.
These are the personalized "AJ XIII Cleats" Alshon Jeffery will be wearing this weekend #Eagles http://pic.twitter.com/mkqweL0uWy
— Eliot Shorr-Parks (@EliotShorrParks) September 7, 2017
He also won’t chirp at Josh Norman on Sunday.
Finally, check out Sean’s first Eagles Mailbag post.
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Some not-so-good news regarding Joel Embiid from Howard Eskin on 94 WIP yesterday:
“He’s not ready for five-on-five play, according to the Sixers. But what I understand is, his agent wants a new contract before he — remember he’s eligible to get a new deal. Now, if you’re the Sixers you can’t give him a max deal until you see that he can play, how many games he can play during the season.
“But my understanding, part of the reason that they’re saying — whoever it is that is saying that he’s not ready for five-on-five play, is because — and Joel Embiid, I don’t think worries about the money, but they listen to their agents. And the agent wants a new contract.”
Brett Brown on WIP – article from Liberty Ballers – said Eskin’s report is BS.
Training Camp will take place from September 26 until September 29 in Camden. One practice per day.
Amir Johnson said some more promising things about Ben Simmons after a community event at the Strawberry Mansion PAL Center:
Was going back over Amir's comments from today.
There was also this: "I truly believe that Ben is going to be the future of this league."
— Brian Seltzer (@brianseltzer) September 7, 2017
Did we see a glimpse of a new red jersey yesterday? Our good friend Conrad Burry made some predictions:
Took a stab at some predictions…I actually don't mind the wacky art deco font. Maybe it'd be alright if they re-drew it cleaner. http://pic.twitter.com/KASlHlRLMS
— Conrad Burry (@conradburry) September 7, 2017
To add to the intrigue, CEO Scott O’Neil gave some input about the funky 70s wordmark in a Tweet two years ago:
I actually like those u? https://t.co/S9Nh0UY6TR
— Scott O'Neil (@ScottONeil) April 17, 2015
EuroBasket updates:
FINAL: 107 – 69
Saric – 22MIN / 18PTS / 10REB / 3AST
— Philadelphia 76ers (@sixers) September 7, 2017
Furkan Korkmaz (Turkey) got a rebound in eight minutes of play in Turkey’s loss to Latvia.
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The Phillies played a game last night as well. They lost to the Nationals 4-3.
Odubel Herrera extended his hit-streak to 20 games, and Jorge Alfaro hit his second big league homer. Aaron Nola gave up three runs on seven hits in 5.1 innings.
Phillies and Nationals do battle again tonight at 7:05. Jake Thompson takes the mound for the Phils against Max Scherzer. God bless.
Scott Kingery and Tom Eshelman were the recipients of this year’s Paul Owens Awards, given to the team’s top minor league player and pitcher.
Meanwhile, former pitcher Brett Myers has a new music video. Not gonna lie, he’s kind of good. Him and Kyle had a weird Twitter exchange:
Thanks… wasn’t bashing you (really). Just not my scene. The song itself isn’t bad
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
Maybe u should come down and hang and see how we have a good time then u might change ur mind
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
Can we talk about the girl in the Yankees shirt though?
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
I didn't like that either but I don't tell them what to wear…she was actually there to keep an eye on my youngins while we shot the video
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
Fair enough.
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
By the way it's at 2300 views and climbing..I just released it at 11pm last night but thanks to u it's gonna keep going up! Seriously thanks
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
By the way just to correct u on the Military issued Belgium Malinois…the dog is actually a German Shepherd…he wants to meet u http://pic.twitter.com/FlYi8vnPF9
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
He should take that as compliment!
— Kyle Scott (@CrossingBroad) September 7, 2017
No he doesn't he's not Belgium he's German! lol Shepherds are larger than the malinois
— Brett Myers Music (@BackWoodRebel39) September 7, 2017
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The Flyers officially announced their training camp would open up next Friday in Voorhees. A complete roster is attached.
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Villanova head coach Jay Wright unveiled Nova’s tribute patch to Rollie Massimino.
In honor of those who came before us… http://pic.twitter.com/xskiNw3AdC
— Jay Wright (@VUCoachJWright) September 7, 2017
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In other sports news, the Cleveland Cavaliers officially introduced Isaiah Thomas, Jae Crowder, and Ante Zizic after acquiring them from Boston. Sam Hinkie also broke his short Twitter silence, retweeting “Isaiah’s” Players Tribune piece:
Real talk. So good. https://t.co/FvWBekIsdL
— Sam Hinkie (@samhinkie) September 6, 2017
Roger Goodell says he’s not a “football expert” on a show nobody watches. I’m not kidding on that second part either:
Source (who or may not be based in Bristol, Conn): The debut of FS1's "First Things First" had a 0.0 rating in 46 out of 56 metered markets.
— John Ourand (@Ourand_SBJ) September 6, 2017
Oregon’s football uniforms for Saturday that were designed by young cancer survivors is fantastic.
"I really think that this is the most important uniform Oregon has ever worn." – Todd Van Horne, Nike Creative Director #StompOutCancer http://pic.twitter.com/8jXgHBObgG
— Oregon Football (@oregonfootball) August 24, 2017
The Browns continue to Brown:
UPDATE: Myles Garrett has been diagnosed with a high ankle sprain. His status will be updated in a couple weeks. http://pic.twitter.com/YvBM4HXnPc
— Cleveland Browns (@Browns) September 7, 2017
Officially, #Browns coach Hue Jackson says S Calvin Pryor is being released for "an "internal matter." Crazy, days before the opener.
— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) September 7, 2017
Lenny Dykstra is trying to get with Lena Dunham, apparently.
Ohio State will wear LeBron Soldier cleats for their game against Oklahoma Saturday night.
An African World Cup qualifier is getting replayed after a referee from the match was issued a lifetime ban by FIFA.
Tweet of the year:
Should've named it Hurricane Roberto Aguayo. Would've missed Florida wide right and sailed right into the Atlantic
— LiTiRilla (@LiTiRilla) September 5, 2017
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In the news, the lawsuit that wanted parking on the Broad Street median has been thrown out and can’t be refiled. Great move by the judge.
Meek Mill explains how much Allen Iverson meant to the city of Philadelphia.
Equifax says about 143 million customers may have been affected by a cyberattack.
Kyle: FUCK EQUIFAX. Seriously. Fuck them. You lose the social security information for HALF of America? Worse, three of their executives sold their stock the days before this came out. How is that legal? The whole credit industry is such a farce. I spent a full year before we bought our new house playing their game, trying to get my credit one level up to save on my mortgage. Opening new lines of credit – I didn’t need – and strategically making purchases and paying them right away all because an algorithm liked it. Worse, there are multiple algorithms depending on the type of credit you’re seeking, so the number you get in your report isn’t what most creditors see unless you pay more for the industry-specific scores – which I did – adding to the mysterious nature of it all. Who would’ve thought that a few agencies having the most important data for all functioning adults in the country could be dangerous? Now some hacker has all of my info – and yours, too! – and Equifax just shrugs about it. Meanwhile, God help you if you missed a student loan payment in 2014 and want a good mortgage rate. Seriously, fuck them. Fuck that whole industry.
Amazon is looking for a location for their second North American headquarters. Mayor Jim Kenney, with puns, has one suggestion:
We think Philadelphia would be a PRIME location for Amazon that would make people SMILE! Look forward to submitting a proposal! https://t.co/l60Wn5BVdg
— Jim Kenney (@PhillyMayor) September 7, 2017
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