#than misha takes off his coat and jensen is fanning himself and staring at misha

[castielscarma]

Cut

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24827896 Kudos and comments are deeply appreciated but not necessary <3 Cockles/Destiel fic 2.7k Rating:M

“So we're doing the thing today, Mish? Are you ready?” Jensen was pacing back and forth in Misha's trailer, glancing at Misha from the corner of his eye.

Misha nodded, a mischievous look in his eye. “Been a long time coming.” He walked over to Jensen and put a hand on his chest, stopping his furious pace back and forth. “We can call this off, Jen. Do another scene first or – “

Jensen shook his head. “Nah, nah, I'm good. I'm good. I just want it to be good, I want the thing to be every –“

Misha placed a finger over Jensen's lips. He smiled but Misha could see the worry in his green eyes. It was subtle but Misha had known Jensen long enough to know that something was off.

“You keep calling it the thing. How about just calling it what it is?” Misha's eyes held softness and Jensen finally relented.

“I know it's a kiss, Mish. It's just, what if it doesn't turn out good, what if the fans don't – “

“Have you ever doubted where we were going with this?”

There was a gleam in Jensen's eyes as he trailed his fingers down Misha's shirt. He was still in his own clothes – wearing an orange shirt that Castiel would never be caught wearing – and Jensen had every intention of divesting him of the fabric. “No, I mean I had my doubts and I know Andrew had the talk with us” – Jensen smiled, “but I knew. I know.”

Misha leaned in close to Jensen, capturing his fingers in his hands. He leaned in close to Jensen and grinned when Jensen licked his lips. Misha angled his head, whispering in Jensen's ear. “Just pretend it's me.”

“That's what I'm afraid of, “ Jensen muttered.

Misha just laughed. “We'll do fine, Jen. We're professionals.” He kissed Jensen on the lips, almost chastely.

“We're professionals at pretending we're professionals.”

Misha pulled away from Jensen.

“If Cas kisses Dean like that, he'll be disappointed. He's waited a decade, Mish!”

Misha erupted in loud laughter as he exited the trailer.

*

Jensen could hear Singer in the background, mumbling something about makeup. Jensen was pretty sure that everything was in order. They hadn't started yet so it wasn't like anything was messy. Although Jensen was a mess. Not on the outside thought, everything was fine on the outside. It was just a big moment and he wanted to do it justice and his stomach churned, turmoil rolling through him. Jensen exhaled softly. It was just Misha.

Singer's familiar voice sounded throughout the set. “Rolling, stand by. Three, two, one, action!”

Jensen felt himself enter Dean's headspace, an act that felt as natural as breathing by this point. Misha, no Cas – this was definitely Cas – stared at Dean, his eyes flitting to Dean's lips before finding his eyes again.

“Look, Cas, we don't need to do this, don't need to do anything.” Dean swallowed and tried to slow down his breathing. That was easier than calming his heart that thumped against his chest like a skittish rabbit.

Cas tilted his head slightly and his blue eyes seemed to stare into Dean's very soul.

There was so much staring.

Jensen opened his mouth, singing, as a smile touched his eyes. “It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes...”

Cas' stoic and somber facade broke as Misha's face split into a grin. He pulled up his shirt and his hips moved seductively. Unbuttoning his shirt, he pressed his groin towards Jensen's. The crew started laughing in the background. Jensen and Misha both started giggling as Singer yelled “cut!”.

*

Dean pushed Cas against the wall roughly, a pleased smile on his face at Cas' surprised grunt. His hands found the lapel of Cas' trench coat and pulled down. He got momentarily distracted as Cas stared at him with an intense look. It was as if Castiel had finally found the answers to a question he'd been asking for years.

Castiel breathed out, his eyes wide with lust. “Dean!” His name was a prayer on Cas' lips

Dean smirked. Now that he finally knew that Cas had felt the same thing for him, the same feelings, the same love as Dean had for Cas, it was like a dam had burst open. All Dean wanted was to claim Cas and let the whole world know that this former angel of the Lord was Dean's.

Slowly, Dean leaned in, finally ready to taste those lips that he'd been having dreams about for years. So many times had he fantasized about this moment, of how Cas' lips would feel against his own skin, of what Cas would taste like. He almost groaned at the mere thought.

Again, a puff of breath caressed Dean's face and Cas' body seemed to be on fire. Heat emanated from him like the sun itself but to Dean, Cas would always be the sun; his presence bringing hope and joy into Dean's life.

Dean pushed his knee in between Cas' legs, his body pressed against the angel's. He was so close to tasting those lush lips, to finally claim Cas when Cas' lust-filled expression broke off. Misha smiled one of his gummy smiles, his frame shaking with laughter. Jensen shook his head as he leaned his forehead on Misha's shoulder. There was amusement in his voice. “Mish, look it up.”

“Sorry, Jensen. We need a break.” Misha continued laughing.

Singer shouted again. “Cut!”

*

Dean moaned against Cas' lips. To finally taste Cas was almost surreal but Cas made sure to ground him with every touch. In the way his fingers carded through Dean's hair, in how his hands ghosted over Dean's chest, pulling at his flannel, in how eagerly his hands flew to Dean's belt fumbling there before Dean got impatient and pushed his hands away. “Hold on, Cas, one second.” He grinned and unbuckled his belt, unbuttoning his jeans swiftly.

“It's been a second.” Cas was on him in seconds, grabbing the ends of the belt and yanked Dean towards him.

A gasp escaped Dean as he felt Cas' body against his, their groins slotted against each other. There was fabric in the way but just the feeling, the press of Cas on him was enough for heat to course through him. Christ, he wasn't going to last for long if this kept up.

Cas claimed his mouth, banishing all future thoughts. The kiss, his tongue in Dean's mouth demanded that he stay in the present.

Dean groaned and pushed Cas against the wall, humming in agreement.

Misha suddenly jumped away, leaving Jensen stumped. His pulse raced suddenly, but not due to something sexy happening. “Misha, you OK?”

Misha was holding his hand over his mouth.

Shame burned Jensen's cheeks and horror turned his mouth dry. Finally, he uttered the words. “Did I – Did I just bit you?”

“I think you did.” Misha moved his hands away slowly and licked his lips. “Am I bleeding?”

“Oh, fuck, Mish, I'm so sorry...” Jensen could hear some of the crew chuckle awkwardly

Misha grinned, his eyes gleaming. “Slow your roll cowboy, we haven't even made it to the bed yet.”

Jensen's cheeks turned red again, but not from shame this time. He turned his eyes down to the floor, shaking his head softly. The crew chuckled again but what brought the broadest smile to Jensen's face was Singer's tired sigh. “Cut!”

*

Dean's hands roamed over Cas' chest and his stomach. “Look at you, Cas...”

Cas hummed in response, thrusting his hips down. “You like what you see?”

Dean moaned as he felt Cas' groin against the thick evidence of his arousal. He wanted to slow down, take it all in but at the same time he wanted to fuck Cas into oblivion. “Yeah, I do. Like the things I feel even better.”

Dean grinned and went for Cas' belt.

“Alright guys, we better cut!”

Jensen sighed in frustration as Misha stilled on top of him. “Why? Something wrong? I thought that was good.”

Misha turned his head to the side, a slight smirk on his lips. “Good call with the cut.”

Jared walked into the set, nodding at the crew. “Hi everyone, hi Bob. Fucking finally. How's it going, guys? Sailing my ship I see.” Jared grinned and waved at Misha and Jensen still laying in bed. “You know, this sight looks fam – “

“Shut up, Jared,” Misha called out.

Jensen rolled his eyes and slumped back down into bed, but couldn't fight the smile coming unbidden. It was going to be a long day.

*

“It's OK, Cas, fuck the shirt. It's not a favorite.”

Cas ignored Dean and continued to unbutton his flannel shirt, his fingers working hurriedly. “I like it,” he said, his voice husky with desire. He pushed it off Dean's arms and the momentary chill Dean felt was replaced by Cas' hands stroking, burning his skin with heat.

Cas pushed Dean gently towards the wall, never stopping with his caresses. Where his fingers trailed over his skin, Dean caught fire. “Fuck, Cas, I need you. I want you.”

A slow smile spread over Cas' face and if that wasn't the most beautiful thing Dean had seen. “I want to take my time, Dean.”

“Time, we've had nothing but time, Cas. We've waited forever, both of us.”

“Well, technically as a celestial being, I have a firmer grasp of the concept of eternity and I can assure you, Dean – “

Dean carded his fingers through Cas' hair and pulled him closer. “Shh.” He grazed Cas' lips, slowly at first, a teasing fleeting kiss but Cas opened up and Dean accepted the invitation. He invaded Cas' mouth and groaned as the taste of Cas was everywhere.

Cas was finally his, and he was going to enjoy every goddamn minute.

Dean's heart agreed and each kiss ratcheted up his pulse until he had to break off the kiss, breathing wildly. “Holy shit.”

Cas's hair was tousled and his lips puffy from all the kissing. His eyes sparkled. No, it was more than that. They shone, and it was not the cold blue glow from Cas' grace within. No, this was a shine that blinded you, that screamed adoration and love and for a brief second, Dean felt like it was too much. That all that love and passion that he knew was aimed at him was not his to bear. Not his to know.

Dean angled his head away. Away from that look that threatened to incinerate him with its honesty and pure, blinding love. He was amazed that Cas had managed to hide that light for so long. And he'd cursed himself a hundred times for failing to see that that brilliant light had been aimed at him. At him. All along it had been aimed at him.

Cas grasped his jaw lightly and urged him to look at him again. “Don't Dean. Everything is alright. Look at me. I love you.” He smiled as if that simple declaration was enough. As if it contained everything that Dean needed to know.

“Don't know when you became the smooth talker.” Dean smiled and kissed him once on the mouth, then trailed kisses down his throat. Each subtle moan escaping Cas' lips was further fuel on Dean's fire. Fuck, he was going to explode soon. “You have way too many clothes on, Cas. Let's get rid of this.”

Dean grabbed Cas' tie and yanked it downwards.

Misha broke and stumbled into Jensen's arms, making choking noises as Jensen continued to pull on the tie.

Jensen's eyebrow shot up.

“Cut!” Singer's voice was laced with frustration but Jensen could hear the amusement beneath.

Jensen glanced down at Misha who was bent over, laughing hysterically. Jensen looked into the camera and shrugged. “Wasn't that supposed to come off?”

The room erupted in laughter.

*

Jensen looked down at Misha and rolled his hips, a frown on his face.

Misha shook his head. “Sorry, Jensen, nothing happening. Not even a wiggle down there.”

Snickers from the crew filled the set.

Jensen smirked. “Damn, Misha, I even slipped you the blue pill and all.”

“My arthritis med must have counteracted it.”

Jensen fell down on Misha's chest, laughing with elicited more cheers from the crew.

“Cut!” Singer sighed, his shoulder slumping. “Okay guys, it's a cut. I think I need a drink.”

*

“We should have practiced more, Jensen.”

Jensen shrugged. “I figured we improvise, like we usually do.”

Singer called out. “Please tell me you've read the script at least. It's an important scene, guys.”

Jensen grinned as he waved at Singer. “Don't worry. We're pros. Of course we read the script.”

Misha grinned and adjusted his position. His smile died down as he turned into Cas. A few seconds passed and he sighed. “Where do I put my hands?”

Jensen leaned in close to Misha and winked. “Wherever you want, baby.”

Singer who had agreed to direct this whole mess was not amused. “We're still rolling, Jensen!”

Misha stared at Jensen and deadpanned. “I'll stick them in your pants then. No one will notice.”

Jensen turned away from the camera and burst out laughing.

“Oh for the love of... Cut!”

*

Cas looked up at Dean and Dean could see the uncertainty there. It killed him.

He took Cas' cheeks in his hands, whispering to him. “It's OK, Cas. I've got you. I got you...” He leaned in and kissed Cas on the corner of the mouth. Trailing kisses further down his neck, he sighed in relief as he felt Cas' strong arms embrace him.

He hugged him back.

Misha clung to Jensen and wrapped his arms tighter around him. He whispered in Jensen's ear but spoke loud enough that the crew would hear him. “Never let go, Jack!”

Jared burst out laughing in the background.

Singer sighed deeply, bone tired. “I'm starting to think this was a mistake.”

*

Misha sank down in the armchair in Jensen's trailer.

“Water or beer?”

“Water. I need to cool down.”

Jensen laughed and grabbed a chilled water from the fridge. He handed it to Misha and sat down next to him. “So... done for the day. You think the scene turned out good?”

Misha scoffed. “With how we goofed around I'd be surprised if they even have any scenes.” He took a sip of water and nodded. “Yeah Jen, I think we did good. How about you, how did you feel?”

Jensen sighed. “I feel drained. I mean don't get me wrong, I think we did good but... We've been building up to this for so long and now when it's shot and done. It feels like I've run a marathon honestly.”

“Ouch, I hope not. I need my hips.”

Jensen laughed and took Misha's hand, squeezing it. “You know what I mean.”

Misha turned solemn. “I do.”

Jensen leaned in and kissed Misha quickly on the lips.

“Not enough kissing for the day?” Misha quipped.

“My lips are raw. No more kissing for a week, Mish.”

Misha laughed. “Somehow I doubt you'll make it a week.” He took another sip of his water.

Jensen raised an eyebrow. “Wanna bet?”

“Jensen, you of all people should know not to make bets with me. Remember how the last one ended?”

Jensen licked his lips and nodded but couldn't keep the smile off his lips. “Yeah, I remember. It was worth it.”

“You brat.” Misha smacked him on the shoulder.

They sat there in silence for a while, just absorbing the day that had passed on set. Finally, Jensen spoke. “Do you think they'll like the ending?”

Misha stilled and looked at Jensen. “Do you want to hear my honest opinion?”

“You know I do.”

“I think the most important thing is how you and I feel. Do you feel that this was an honest and true ending for Dean Winchester?”

Jensen paused and tried not to get too emotional. He still had a really hard time processing the words “ending” and “Dean Winchester” in the same sentence. “I do. And I think the majority will be satisfied with how the show ends too.”

Misha nodded. “And if they don't?”

“Then I'll rest in the knowledge that I think we honored Dean Winchester and his journey. And that is enough. How about you?”

“Cas' journey has been perfection. He's the fan favorite. Of course, the fans will love it.”

Jensen burst out laughing and leaned in to kiss Misha. “Shut up.”

Misha grinned. “Make me.”

[castiel-left-his-mark-on-me]

“Destiel Deserved”

“So, they’re finally doing it huh?”

“Looks that way.”

Jensen closes the script and looks up at Misha, who is sitting close beside him and still reading his own copy. “What do you think?”

Misha finally tears his eyes away and turns his head towards him. “About the scene?”

Jensen nods. “Yeah—about all of it. About how this will change things. It’s gonna change the conventions, the fanbase, the questions we get asked—everything.”

With a sigh, Misha bows his head and takes a moment to think about Jensen’s words. “Yeah—I suppose it will.”

“I don’t know if I’m ready for that, are you?” Jensen asks after another beat, wanting some company in this tub of confusion.

Misha shrugs. “I dunno, maybe. I mean—it’s not like there haven’t been hints towards this for years. And a lot—a lot of fans want it to happen.”

“And a lot don’t.”

Misha sighs again. “A lot don’t, you’re right … but, do you honestly feel like this isn’t where the story is supposed to go?”

Jensen gulps and then hunches forward. “I don’t know, man! It makes sense, sure … but …”

“The change is worrying. Yeah, I get it” Misha confirms, making Jensen relax a little with the solidarity.

“I just don’t want this to cause some war, you know? I want this to be just another big moment for the show—not a moment that might end it.”

Misha leans over and bumps Jensen’s shoulder with his own, pulling the man’s eyes up to meet his. “You’re such a catastrophist” he says with a mocking smile. “I don’t think this will end the show … will it cause some clashes among the fans? Sure—but those fights have always been there, this is just the final round where the winner is announced. There will be some fallout, but there will also be huge celebration, and by the time we’re all back on stage talking to the fans about it, things will have settled down. You’ll see.”

Jensen huffs, but stays slumped over. “I hope you’re right.”

“Aren’t I always?”

“Uh—no.”

Misha grins before rolling back with a laugh. “Well, fine—I can be sometimes though, and I’m sure I’m right about this.”

Jensen laughs as well—but it’s softer and with half the heart.

Misha soon settles and then frowns at him. “What else is wrong?”

Jensen shrugs once more, not wanting to admit that he has deeper concerns than just the short talk and confessions coming up in the latest script.

“Jensen…” Misha mutters with warning.

“I dunno, man …”

“You don’t know what—about the scene, or about you and me?”

Jensen peers up in surprise, but he knows he shouldn’t be. Misha has always had the ability to read him like a book.  “I … um …”

Misha smiles before tilting in to kiss his forehead, causing Jensen to close his eyes and breathe the other man in. Scents of him fill Jensen up. The familiar lure of his being rock his tension away. Misha pulls back again and looks at him sternly. “You and me—our families, our life … I won’t let anyone change that, okay? Whatever happens on this show, whatever scene the writers put down in these pages, it won’t change what we have here.”

“You can’t be sure of that” Jensen says pathetically, barely whispering the words loud enough for himself to hear.

“Yes, I can” Misha gravels sharply. “I can because we are not the show. Fans can speculate and they can rumor, they can dissect every single thing we do or say, but as long as we keep a distance between our characters and ourselves, all they will ever have are their rumors. You and I just need to keep doing what we’re doing. We will be ourselves but not talk about us—not openly, not intentionally. It’s our business and no one else’s.”

Jensen watches Misha flare out his nostrils with his certainty, and it makes him smile. “Yeah” he finally says, looking over his friend’s face and all the memories that come with it. “It’s our business.”

That eventually causes Misha to break his stoned features and grin. “Exactly. And this … is our business too” he whispers, leaning in again to kiss Jensen’s lips. “And this …” he mutters against them as he crawls forward to climb over him and straddle Jensen’s lap. “And this too …” Misha breathes, slipping their tongues together, moving back and forth on top of him, chuckling as he feels the man’s body turn to mush.

“I like our business” Jensen moans, sliding his arms around Misha’s hips and pulling him closer.

“I love our business” Misha confirms as one of his hands finds its way beneath Jensen’s shirt.

“I loved it first” Jensen counters, halting his movement a moment so that he can lean back and look Misha in the eye. “I loved it from the moment I saw it.”

“So I’m an ‘it’ now?” Misha laughs, cocking an eyebrow as he stares down into those soft green eyes.

“You’ve always been it” Jensen says, with nothing but seriousness and heart filling his voice.

Misha’s cheeks turn red and the skin of his palm burns against Jensen’s chest. “You’re such a charmer” he mutters roughly, still trying to play it off—because he never knows how to react when faced with real praise and love.

Jensen smiles at him, in as much awe as he’s ever been. “I’m just being honest” he says finally, lifting up a hand so he can pull Misha down again, kissing him harder than before—but the taste is sweeter now that the honesty has coated his tongue.

They carried on until their clothes covered the floor and their skin was covered in sweat. They gasped in unison as Misha lied across Jensen’s chest,crumpled up on top of the couch—spent and delirious, but completely content in their togetherness.

“Hey, Mish?” Jensen eventually mutters—nearly asleep as his mind simmers into soup.

“Hm?” Misha hums, seeming like he’s circling unconsciousness himself.

“I’m glad that Dean and Cas are finally going to be together.”

Those blue eyes rock up—dark tousled hair and sleepy face surrounding them, and they look onto Jensen with such contentment, it’s like blanket warming both their bodies against the coldest Vancouver night. “Me too” he whispers, a smile dripping over Jensen’s skin. “I’m glad that they’ll finally get to feel like this. They deserve this kind of happiness.”

“Yeah” Jensen says, lifting his hand to run his fingers through Misha’s hair. “Yeah—they really, really do.”

[_]

[hornsbeforehalos]

Forever, Sweetheart: Part 3

Pairing: Rob Benedict x OFC, past Norman Reedus x OFC Warning: Smut, Language, RPF, mentions of violence and sexual assault, mentions of miscarriage, recreational drug use (weed), drinking, Rated E for EXPLICT A/N: I’m sincerely sorry for the lack of GIF usage in this chapter. I’m in desperate need of new gifs :/

As per usual I mean no harm or offense to anyone referenced or mentioned. this is a work of FICTION and no all your favorite people will be your favorite people in this. They’re characters.

Please do not read this if you are under the age of 18. Please do not copy or steal this and put it somewhere else. I will find you.

I do not own anything related to Supernatural or The Walking Dead or any other shows mentioned in this work of fiction. I am not affiliated with AMC or CW in any way.

MASTERLIST

Tags: @coffee-obsessed-writer @sandlee44 @wildefiction @sorenmarie87@through-thesilver-lining @runekisses @pink1031 @zelda2248@kazzieglove @journeyrose @his-paradox@docharleythegeekqueen @beffyblueeyes @death-unbecomes-you @daryldixonandfrogs @charlottecl Please let me know if you want to be added to the list!

“Kylin, where the fuck do you think you’re going?” Misha boomed, following me down the corridor as I quickly made my way to my hotel room, “You can’t just leave!”

I was done. After the previous night’s conversation with Mingus, hearing Misha bitch and complain all day about my brother and him getting into another fight, and the sixth convention guest to bring up my dead son, I was done.

As we passed my Jensen’s room, Misha stopped and pounded on the door as I rounded a corner, attempting to get away.

“What, dude? I told you-” I heard Jensen start to say, but was cut off by Misha’s muffled voice. I could hear the door suddenly slam closed as two sets of footsteps rapidly approached. the two men turned the corner and made it to me before I had the chance to get the door of my room closed.

“Stop, Kylin,” Jensen growled, shoving his foot in between the door and its frame, “Talk to me.”

“There’s nothing to fucking talk about, Jay. I’m done with this shit. I can’t deal with it. I’m going home.” I replied, attempting to shut the door again but was blocked by Misha’s large hand smacking against it. They pushed themselves inside, both looking like they wanted to ring my neck.

“You have responsibilities, here, Ky. Being here is your job.” Misha said, a firm tone to his voice as he crossed his arms over his chest, “You can’t just leave because you got your feelings hurt.”

“Fuck you, Misha! Dealing with inconsiderate fans is not in my fucking job description,” I seethed, turning around and beginning to collect my things around the room. “I don’t see how ya’ll don’t understand.”

Throwing my suitcase on the bed, I couldn't stop the tears from escaping my eyes as I began shoving things inside, “I told you I wasn’t ready.”

“It’s been over a year, Kylin,” Jensen retorted, running his hand down his face as he shook his head. His eyes were glaring into mine as, his voice low and annoyed, “You gotta move on.”

“Move on?” I snapped, jerking my head as I turned on him, “Move- What the fuck did you just say to me?”

I shoved him as hard as hard as I could into the wall, a deep thud sounding as he hit the drywall, “You think someone can just move on from losing their child, Jay? Really?! What if it was one of your fuckin’ kids!”

Jensen pushed himself off the wall, his eyes hard as he advanced towards me, his large palms wrapping around my upper arms, finger tips digging into my flesh as he shook me, “None of that shit would have even happened if you’d had let me take fucking care of it.”

I twisted out of his grip and raised my hand, grunting as my fist connected with his jaw. Misha took the separation as a chance to get in between us, but was easily pushed away by Jensen as he lunged for me again.

“You didn’t have to watch him die,” He snarled, his hands meeting my chest and knocking the wind out of me as he pushed me onto the bed, climbing on top of me and holding me down as I attempted to fight and kick him off of me, “You got to be in dreamland while we had to clean up your fuckin’ mess.”

“Jensen, what the fuck!?” Rob’s voice suddenly bellowed as him and Misha ripped him off of me. Rob instantly pulled me up and placed me behind him as Misha pushed Jensen back against the wall. Misha had apparently placed a call to him for help with me and he’d just now been able to get there.

“So you wanna blame me now, too, huh?” I seethed, pushing my hair out of my face as I panted. Robbie gripped onto my shoulders as I tried to push past him, my need to beat the shit out my brother raging, “Go fuck yourself, Jensen.”

Jensen stayed silent as his eyes said everything I needed to know. He pushed Misha off of him with a huff, shoving him to the side before exiting the room with a slam of the door.

“Get the fuck out, Dmitri,” I growled, venom drenching my tone as I spat my resignation, “I’m fucking done.”

Misha stared at me intensely for a moment before giving a quiet nod, leaving Rob and I alone with a click of the door.

There was a moment of silence between the two of us before Rob finally asked, “You’re really leaving?”

“I have to,” I croaked, turning my back to him as I straightened out my things again, “I told you I wasn’t ready and nobody wanted to listen to me.”

“I thought you were going to sing with me tonight.” Rob said, sadness coating his words, “I had a whole thing planned.”

“I’m sorry, Rob. I need to go home.”

2 weeks later.

I spotted Rob as I maneuvered the Camaro through the airport, pulling up next to him as he waited for me in the pick up area. He crawled into the car after putting his bags in the trunk, his mouth set into a firm line as I leaned over to kiss his cheek.

“How was the flight?” I asked as I pulled away from the curb and followed the signs for the exit.

“Fine.” Rob grunted, shrugging his shoulders as he leaned his head against the window and closed his eyes.

“You tired, babe?” I frowned, reaching my hand for his that he brushed off.

“I’m fine,” He sighed, still not opening his eyes.

“You sure?” I asked quietly, my eyebrows lifting slightly in confusion at his passiveness. Usually if we were apart for more than a couple of days he’d be all over me already. Or at leasts talking my ear off.

“I said I’m fine, Kylin,” He snapped, opening his eyes as he jerked them towards me, his brow set in annoyance and his eyes dark, “I just want to go home.”

“What’s with the attitude?” I recoiled, gripping the steering wheel tighter as I made my way through the Los Angeles traffic, “Grumpy gills.”

“What’s with- Wha- you know what, never mind.” Rob replied, shaking his head with a huff before returning it to his previous position against the window.

“There somethin’ you wanna say to me, Rob?” I drawled, my own annoyance bubbling up as I shifted my eyes back to him from the road.

“Not a thing.” He grunted in return, crossing his arms over his chest and appearing to go to sleep when I didn’t respond.

It was two and a half hours of silence between me and Rob and he ‘slept’ (I really don’t think he was actually sleeping. NOt many people can sleep in the car with me driving, especially in LA) until we reached his house. He finally peeled his face off the window as we pulled into his driveway, and he hopped out of the car to grab his bags before I could even get my seat belt off.

“I’ll be in the studio,” he announced as he walked past me after dropping his stuff in the living room. I stood up from where I’d knelt down to let Lilly out of her cage, the dog bounding for the backyard immediately. Turning back to Rob, my eyes finally met his, the blue orbs that usually brought me comfort, cold and barren, “Try not to bug me.”

“Bug you? What the fuck, dude? What the fuck is wrong with you?” I finally snapped, the anger and confusion spurring me into rage, “It’s obvious that you’re pissed at me for something so why don’t you act like a fucking adult and spill?”

“Well, I don’t know, Kylin, why would I be pissed at you?” Rob asked sarcastically, his eyes narrowing as he took a step towards me, “Why on God’s green earth would I be pissed off, huh?”

“Is this really about me leaving?” I shot back, my head cocking to the side as I narrowed my own lids at him, “You don’t think I tried-”

“It’s not about you leaving, Ky,” Rob interrupted, sighing as he wiped his face with the palms of his hands, “You-you… you know what? Never mind. It’s not worth the argument.”

“Not worth the argument? What the fuck, Rob?”

Ignoring me, Rob made his way down the hallway to the door of the studio. I followed him, but stopped in my tracks as he turned back towards me before turning the knob on the door. His eyes were hard, his brow furrowed in his anger and I could see his jaw clench and unclench as he tried to remain calm.

“Just leave me alone for right now, Ky. I’ll talk to you later.” And with that, he opened the door and stepped in the room, closing the barrier in my face.

Three hours later, I was laying out in the backyard by the pool with Lilly curled up by my feet, my eyes closed as I basked in the evening sunset. I heard the door open before Rob’s shadow cast over me, blocking the sun’s rays from my body.

“What do you wanna do about dinner?” He asked as I opened my eyelids to meet his gaze, his cerulean irises betraying his attempt at nonchalance.

“Oh, he speaks.” I snorted, sitting up from the chair I’d been lounging in to lean over and grab my pack of cigarettes on the nearby table.

I could almost hear the eye roll that came from him, his shoulders tensing as he watched me light the smoke with a huff.

“Pizza or cheeseburgers?” Rob asked, not responding to my comment, “I don’t feel like cooking.”

“Well, if you go look in the oven, there’s lasagna.” I replied, laying back against the chair as I exhaled a plume of smoke in his direction.

I had to swallow down the giggle that threatened to rise as he was unable to mask the way his eyes lit up. Clearing his throat, Rob looked down to his feet for a second before back to me, nodding his head as he regained his act. It looked as if for a second that he was going to say something else, but apparently decided against it as he crossed his arms over his chest, the cold look in his stare returning.

“You coming?” He asked before turning around towards the back door, not waiting on my answer before disappearing back into the house.

I gave him a minute as I finished the cigarette, smashing the butt into my ashtray with a sigh before heading inside myself. I found Rob in the dining room, the plates already sitting in our usual spots on the table as he set the dish of pasta down.

Turning to the kitchen, I grabbed the two wine glasses he had set out off the counter as well as the big bottle of red beside them. Returning to the table, I set them down beside the place mats and proceeded to sit down and make my plate.

Rob continued his vow of silence throughout the meal, keeping his mouth occupied with shovels of pasta and marinara and cheese. I ate slowly, substituting sustenance for alcohol.

“So is this how it’s gonna be now, or are you going to talk to me?” I finally asked, after watching him do everything in his power to avoid eye contact with me for a good thirty minutes.

Shrugging, Rob took a sip of his wine glass before muttering, “Nothing really to talk about, Ky.”

“Then why are you acting like this, Rob? You keep sayin’ it’s nothing when it’s obviously somethin’.”

Picking at the rim of the glass, his eyes finally looked into mine as he sighed, “I just… I had this whole thing planned at Jib and then you just...left and hardly have talked to me since.”

Sighing myself, my eyes shifted down to my hand that had been tinkering with my fork. I felt bad about leaving, but I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t deal with those memories like I had thought I could. It had taken almost a week for me to shake myself out of the funk, and even then it had been hard to talk to Rob when I missed him so much and knew that he was still there.

“I’m not going to say I’m sorry, Rob.”

“I tried really hard not to be pissed, Ky. I really did,” He said, his voice even and low but not angry like it had been previously, “But no matter how much I tried, I couldn’t help it.”

“Why? What did you have planned?”

“It doesn’t matter now,” He answered, shaking his head with a feint chuckle, “It was probably a bad idea anyway.”

Quirking my eyebrow at him curiously, My eyes bore into his as my tongue brushed over my teeth in annoyance.

“So, this is just how it’s going to be for now?”

“Until I can get over being pissed, yes.”

“Fine, whatever,” I huffed, pushing the chair back from the table and standing up. I picked up my plate and turned around, muttering over my shoulder, “I’ll be outside.”

The beautiful purple and orange hues had faded into an inky blackness, the faint shadow of clouds rolling over a few speckled stars that weren’t out shined by the bright city lights. I brought the  joint to my lips as I stared up into the deep abyss that was the sky, inhaling the sweet, thick smoke.

I’d been outside for another hour, finishing the bottle of wine as I lay beside the pool, my toes dipped into the cool water. The sound of the sliding glass was heard again as I exhaled, my head rolling lazily to the side as I watched Rob edge around the side of the pool to where I was.

Sitting down to where his legs were beside my head, he sunk his ankles into the water as he took the spliff from my fingers and took a drag. He suppressed a cough as he handed it back to me, his shoulders shaking before he let the smoke billow out of his lungs, the large cloud swirling and winding up to the dark sky.

“You comin’ inside?” Rob finally asked, after a few moments of passing the joint back and forth between each other in silence.

I sighed, raising myself up before tossing the roach, “Yeah, I guess.”

I stood up and brushed myself off, turning to go inside when Rob’s hand shot out to catch mine from his place still sitting. My eyes met his as I looked down at him, his bottom lip worried between his teeth as he gazed up at me.

Huffing out a exhale, he tugged me by the arm to turn back around to face him. He grasped my other hand with his as he rose to his knees, his blue eyes shining bright despite the darkness.

“What?” I asked, seeing a different look in his eye from earlier as his thumbs brushed the tops of my hands.

Shaking his head, he let me go as he stood up, and I followed him inside the house in silence.

“I’m going to go take a shower, I’ll be in bed in a little bit,” Rob informed as we reached the top of the steps, his arm curling into my waist to pull me to him so he could kiss the top of my head. The act was obviously forced, and I cringed as I felt him nudge me in the direction of the bedroom before making his way to the bathroom.

The smoke and the wine had settled inself deep in my bones by the time I got dressed in my pajamas, the cool cotton sheets feeling wonderful against my skin as I covered myself in them. I was already half asleep when Rob came in from his shower. I felt the bed dip in and could smell the clean scent of his body wash float through the room as he joined me under the covers. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and wrap my arms around him, but the rejection I had received earlier kept me rooted to my spot. I kept my eyes closed as I felt him press his lips to my temple, brushing a stray hair from my face as he whispered, “I love you forever, sweetheart.”

One week later.

“Ky? You here?” Rob called as I heard the alarm beep for the front door.

“In here!” I yelled back from my place in the kitchen. I was currently standing on the counter attempting to reach a cookie sheet that had somehow managed to be stored where neither I nor even Rob could reach. Not that Rob even ever made cookies.

“What the hell is this?” Rob asked, unable to hide the chuckle as he entered the room and saw the state of it. Let’s just say the flower had gotten away from me.

“Can you grab this for me?” I asked, extending the sheet out for him to take as he approached. I hoped down from the counter with a thud, taking the pan back from him after I got my balance, “Thanks.”

“What’re you doing?” He inquired with a cocked eyebrow, turning to examine the various plates of different types of cookies scattered around the room, followed by the dusting of flour over what appeared to be everything else.

Shrugging, I replied, “Makin’ cookies.”

“I can see that. You okay?”

“As good as I can be,” I snorted, rolling my eyes at his sudden interest in my emotions. He’d remained stoic for the past week, only talking to me when he absolutely had to and nothing about anything that could lead into any form of friendly conversation. I’d slowly slipped back into the depressive state I had worked so hard to get out of, that he’d helped me get out of, and didn’t see it ending any time soon.

“Choco chips are good,” Robbie mused from behind me with his mouth full as I began to clump out the remaining dough onto the sheet.

“Thanks,” I replied as I finished, sliding them onto the rack in the oven to bake. I set about cleaning up the mess that’d I’d made, wiping the counters off and throwing any trash into the can. I had just crossed passed Robbie on my way to put the bag of flour in the other pantry when my foot found a wet spot. The bag of flour flew out of my hand as I slipped, Robbie catching me just in time to prevent my head from being cracked open on the tile. The bag erupted on impact, covering the both of us with the white dust as Rob slipped himself, my body weight pulling him to the floor with me.

“Fuck!” I grunted as he landed on me, though most of his mass had been caught by his arms. Sputtering the flour out of my mouth, I wiped my eyelids to see Rob hovering over me, a grin splitting his face as he tried not to bust out laughing.

“Don’t you dare laugh at me, Benedict,” I hissed, my own lips curling upwards though as I took in the sight of him, “This is all your fault!”

Rolling off of me and onto his back on the floor, Rob let the laugh go as he sprawled out. It was a deep, hearty laugh, the kind that I hadn’t heard from him in a while, and I couldn’t stop it from spreading to me. His hand wrapped around my wrist as he pulled me to his chest, his arms encasing me as we both shook as we attempted to catch our breaths.

“You look ridiculous,” Rob chuckled, his free hand coming to my face to dust off my nose. I snapped my teeth at his fingers playfully, earning me a squeeze from his arms and another laugh.

“Let me go,” I giggled, swatting his hands away and prying myself from his arms. I carefully gathered myself to my feet, my hand reaching out to help him pull himself up.

His eyes met mine as we righted ourselves in a sweet stare, the love and adoration in his eyes showing once again for the first time in weeks. Running his hands up my arms and into my hair, he tugged me closer to him and pressed his lips into mine for the first kiss we’d shared since I left for the airport in Italy.

His tongue danced with mine for dominance the moment I parted my lips for him, a whimper leaving my mouth as he instantly pushed me into the counter. His arms enveloped me on either side, his calloused fingers running down my neck and arms.

“Let’s go get cleaned up, baby. Worry about the mess later.” He mumbled into my skin, enticing gooseflesh to the surface as he hiked me up his body and wrapped my legs around his waist, “I think I owe you an apology.”

His hands had reached around to massage my tender nipples as the water cascaded down around us, washing the sticky paste from the flour away with all the animosity we’d had for each other over the past week. His beard brushed against my shoulder, leaving red marks in its wake as his lips caressed the junction between my throat and collar bone. A deep, wanton moan slipped through my vocal chords as his guitar-worn finger tips trailed down my belly, dipping into the heated slickness between my thighs.

“I’m so sorry, Ky,” He panted as his teeth grazed my pulse point, his strong arms wrapping around me to hold me close, “I love you.”

“I love you too, Robbie,” I mumbled hazily, arching my back to grind my ass against his growing erection as the pleasure from his fingers coursed through me. “Forever.”

“Forever, Sweetheart,” Robbie echoed as he nudged my thighs apart with his foot, his hands moving to my hips to hold me in position.

He pushed into me swiftly, a deep-seeded groan reverbing off the tile walls lining the bathroom. His hips rocked back and forth slowly, grinding into my wet flesh and earning him another lust-filled keen to fall from my lips.

His hands caressed my body as he whispered sweet apologies into my ear, the pace of his thrusts quickening as the tension in us started to build. Pulling out to turn me around, I crawled into his arms again as he held me against the wall, his tongue immediately finding my own as he rutted between my thighs.

“I’m sorry I’m a dick,” He repeated, sliding back inside me as my nails scraped down his back, “You deserve better.”

“Shut up,” I hissed, my eyes rolling back into my skull as the head of his cock dug into my g-spot, “I love you.”

“Love you more,” he argued, slamming back into me for punctuation and punching another mewl from me, “Love you so much.”

“Fuck, Robbie,” I gasped as he pummeled into me, my shoulder blades bitten by the unforgiving tile, “Need you.”

“Need you too, sweetheart,” He breathed into my face, pulling away again to turn me back around, “Need to fuck you.”

“Fuck me, Rob,” I keened, impaling myself on his cock again. Driving himself as far into me as possible, Rob’s fingers dug into my skin as he unleashed a barrage of powerful strokes, knocking the wind from me as he pounded into my lithe frame from behind.

“Fuck, so good, Kylin,” He groaned, continuing to press crescent shape indentions into my hips as he rode me, “Fuck, so tight.”

“Harder, Rob,” I begged, feeling the coil already tightening in my belly as I dove my hand between my legs to rub my clit, “Fuck, babe, please, harder.”

“Shit,” He hissed as he followed my command, his body jerking back and forth as fast as he could, “Fuck.”

“Gonna come, Robbie,” I panted, my muscles instinctively clenching around him as the dam began to break, “Oh my god.”

“That’s it,baby, let me feel you,” He rasped, one hand coming to wipe the water from his face as he continued his assault, “Come on my dick, Kylin.”

“Fuck!” I barked as the bow broke, my body trembling as my world shattered into pieces that only Rob could put back together. Goosebumps pimpled across my flesh as my body convulsed, sucking Rob deeper than I thought possible as he pumped himself inside of me even harder.

“That’s it, good girl,” He praised between broken breaths, a groan vibrating through him as his own orgasm neared, “Fuck, gotta come.”

Pushing him back with my hips before pulling away from him, I got down on my knees before Rob could argue, swallowing him into my mouth just in time for the salty liquid to pour down my throat. His fingers curled into my sopping hair, holding my head still as his hips jerked as he worked his way through the waves crashing over him.

“Fuck,” He finally breathed, pulling his hips away from my face so I could catch my own breath, “God damn.”

I stood up and turned back around to face the spray, my legs still shaking as I rinsed myself off before cutting the water. Rob handed me a fluffy black towel from the rack outside of the tub, wrapping it around my shoulders before he pulled me back into his chest.

“I’m sorry, I really am.” Rob sighed, his eyes lowered as he rubbed my arms up and down, “I was just so disappointed I couldn’t…”He stopped, trailing off without finishing his sentence.

“Just talk to me about this shit, Rob,” I chided, bringing my hand from under the towel to cup his face, “You know you have to talk to me.”

“I know,” Rob replied, holding the curtain open so I could step out of the tub carefully, “You know I suck at this.”

“Yeah, well, I suck worse, so no excuses,” I chuckled, drying off the excess water from my body before wrapping the towel around my hair and reaching for my robe, “I don’t like us like that.”

“Me either, sweetheart,” Rob spoke, having wrapped the towel around his waist before pulling me back into his arms, “I promise, not again.”

Nuzzling into his chest, I inhaled his intoxicating scent, feeling secure and home for the first time since he’d returned.

[67-chevy-baby]

Something New

Ship - Cockles - Single!Jensen x Single!Misha

Rating - 18+ Only!!!!

Tags - First-time m/m sex, anal fingering, anal sex, rimming, oral (male receiving), mentions of coming out, mentions of not being accepted, anxiety, angst, fluff, smut, comfort, drinking, and language

Word Count - 3800 ish … I’m not even remotely sorry lol

Beta - The amazing @kittenofdoomage :) I am forever grateful to her.

Misha flirted a lot. Everyone knew this and accepted it as a part of his outgoing nature. Jensen, on the other hand, still hadn't grown accustomed to the lingering touches and longing stares from his best friend. It wasn't that it made him uncomfortable, no it was very much the opposite.

He tried to ignore the way his heart sped up every time Misha's fingers grazed his skin or the way he held him when they would hug, but it was impossible. Jensen didn't want to admit it. He was supposed to be straight, find a nice woman and give his Mother and Father the grandkids they wanted. Instead, he was having an internal battle with his mind on whether or not his male co-star was hot or not.

Jensen sighed and rubbed at his temples lightly. Currently, he was reading over the newest script for one of the upcoming episodes. People probably thought that playing Dean should have come to him naturally by now since he played him on TV for the better part of thirteen years. Sometimes it was more complicated than just 'getting into character' though.

Certain scenes, much like the one he was reading now, involved Cas and Dean staring into each other's eyes for a longer than normal period of time. That part didn't bother him as much. It was the stage direction that was written in the script. Of course, he didn't write the script or the stage directions so he didn't really have much of a say in how their characters did things.

Jensen stared down at the off-white paper. His eyes re-reading the same bold print that menacingly stared back up at him.

INT. THE BUNKER, DAY

There's tension between Dean and Cas from a previous argument.  They eye fuck for approx. 30-45 seconds until Sam clears his throat to get their attention.

He swallowed thickly wishing the direction would change probably for the umpteenth time now.

Couldn't they have picked a better way to word this?

A sudden knock at his trailer door made him jump. He tossed the script onto his coffee table before walking across the room to unlock it. The familiar silhouette of Jared should have put his mind at ease, but he knew his best friend of so many years would notice something was bothering him. Deciding there was no point in avoiding the inevitable, he flung open the door to let him in.

"Hey Jare"

Jared walked up the two stairs into Jensen's trailer and plopped down on his sectional.

"You're awfully quiet today, Jackles. What's going on?"

Jensen sighed running a hand across his face. Good thing he hadn't been to hair and makeup yet. He didn't wanna piss anyone off this early in the day. Grabbing two beers, he tossed one to Jared and sat down.

"I don't really wanna talk about it. Not like there's anything anyone can do about it anyway."

He took a long pull of his beer while Jared studied him. He watched Jensen's eyes glance at the stapled packet of papers quickly before focusing on the view from the window.

"It's something from today's shoot isn't it, Jay?"

Jared picked up the papers and leaned back against the couch. Jensen didn't try and stop him, but he didn't elaborate either. He just sat and watched as the taller Texan read over the page he'd been mulling over a few minutes ago.

"I don't see anything wrong wi-"

Jared stopped mid-sentence and turned to look at Jensen. He scooted slightly closer and pointed to the middle of the page.

"It's the 'eye fucking' part isn't it?"

Jensen looked away, picked at a loose string in the hem of his jeans. The beer bottle rested loosely against his lips as he took another swig.

"Jensen, you should really tell him, you know."

It was a miracle the beer didn't come out his nose. It took him a minute to stop choking and gain his breath back. The blush creeping up the side of his neck as he looked down at his lap.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Jared."

Once again the script was tossed carelessly on the coffee table. Jared scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"Oh c'mon, Jay! You can't possibly think I believe you. I know how you feel about Mish, and I think you do, too. It's okay to admit that you got a thing for him, and frankly, I think you should talk to him about it. I mean look at it this way, how many times have we told fans that it's okay to be yourself. Love is love, and honestly, I think Misha feels the same way."

Jensen let out a defeated sigh. He should have known better. He and Jared can read each other like a book, and sometimes that wasn't necessarily a good thing.

"I can't tell him, Jared. I'm not supposed to feel things like this for another man. My parents didn't bring me up this way. I'm just going to grin and bear it until we get through shooting this. I'm an actor. I can just push my feelings aside until this is all over with."

Jared set his bottle down and repositioned himself so he was facing him. Jensen looked miserable. He was clearly stressing way too much over this. He was pale and dark circles lingered under his eyes from lack of sleep.

"Jay, that's bullshit and you know it! You can't control the way you feel for someone. It doesn't matter how your parents wanted you to turn out. What does matter is who you want to be. If the real you is attracted to both men and women, then so be it. If your Mom and Dad can't accept you for who you are, then they aren't taking your best interest to heart."

Jensen rested his head in his hands and shook his head.

"Even if they miraculously accept the fact that I have a crush on Mish, how the hell am I going to tell him? I have no idea how I'll get the words out, let alone bring it up."

Jared stood up and walked toward the liquor cabinet. He pulled a bottle of Crown Royal from the top shelf and blew the dust off.

“Sounds like you could use some stronger liquid courage.”

Now it was Jensen’s turn to scoff. He watched as Jared grabbed two glasses from one of the cabinets and put a couple cubes of ice in them.

“I can’t shoot these scenes drunk off my ass Jared. Bob will have my head.”

If Jared heard him, he didn’t acknowledge it. Instead, he focused on pouring them each a glass. Handing one to Jensen, he sat back down and sipped at his slowly. After a minute of looking between his glass and his best friend, he sighed and licked his lips.

“Ah what the hell, why not? Gotta get through today’s shooting somehow.”

Forty-five minutes later everyone was on the Bunker set setting up for the next scene. The crew was getting the lighting perfected while the director, who just happened to be none other than Richard Speight Jr., conversed with Misha across the room. Jensen shifted his weight nervously and tried to look anywhere else. His eyes kept finding their way back to him though.

Even though their characters wore layers upon layers of clothing, Jensen could still tell Misha had been working out. His thighs were well defined in the black slacks, how the tan fabric of Castiel’s trench coat hugged his biceps made his mouth water, and the way his hair was tousled sent image after naughty image through his mind.

Jensen bit his lip and looked away. There was no way he was surviving this scene. Misha had him hook, line, and sinker, and the way things were looking he was going to end up walking offset before they had a usable take. Before he was able to dwell on it any longer, fingers snapped in his face bringing him back to reality.

“Hellooo! Jensen? You okay man? We’re ready to start, but if you need a minute we-”

Jensen pushed past Rich and stood on his mark that was taped to the floor.

“I’m good. Let’s get this over with.”

Misha studied him, his piercing cerulean eyes making him shiver. Jared walked around the table and sat in front of the open laptop. Things were eerily quiet between the three of them. Normally, they would be joking around until the moment action was called.

Rich took a seat in the director's chair and looked through the camera one more time making sure the angle of the shot was right before turning his attention back to them.

“Roll sound!”

One of the crew members came in with a slate board and held it in front of the camera.

“Supernatural scene thirty-two, take one! Marker!”

Rich took a deep breath and crossed one leg over the other. He knew this was an intense scene so he was mentally preparing himself to do more than one take.

“Action!”

Misha walked around the table holding a tattered old book. Jensen eyed him furiously as he snatched it out of his hand.

“Dammit, Cas! I know we needed this book, but I told you not to do anything stupid!”

Misha tilted his head sideways narrowing his eyes. The hand that was holding the book now rested rigidly at his side, his fingers curled into a fist.

“Dean, this was probably our only chance for us to get this book! I took a chance and brought it back unharmed. I did it for you! You want to save your brother don’t you?”

Jensen slammed the book on the table a little too hard causing Jared to jump. It wasn’t in the script, but no one said anything so he continued with his line.

“You could have waited for Sammy and me! We could have gone and got it together. Cas, you could have got yourself killed man! When are you gonna learn that you’re our family Cas? Family sticks together. Sammy needs you ... I need you.

Misha stepped slightly closer to Jensen and lifted those ocean eyes up to his green ones. Jensen was shaking. Whether it was with rage or nervousness he didn’t know, but he had to finish this scene. He couldn’t do this more than once. His eyes flitted down to Misha’s mouth just as his tongue came out to wet his lips, and dammit if he didn’t feel his cock twitch. He couldn’t do this. He needed to get out of there. Just as he was about to storm off to the confines of his trailer, Jared cleared his throat.

“Guys … get this! So, the writings in this book are apparently a dead language! There’s some sort of codex that requires piecing together, but I think I can crack it if I can just get past this encrypted file.”

“Cut!”

Rich stood up and rubbed his hands together.

“That was great guys! Very well done with the dynamics. Oh! Nice touch with making Jared jump Jay. His face was priceless! I’m recommending that one for the gag reel.”

Jensen wasn’t listening. He was still staring at Misha, who was now taking off Cas’ tan coat. He watched as his back muscles flexed under his white button-up, and immediately felt his mouth go dry. He couldn’t stand in the same space as his co-star any longer. It was too much. Everyone watched as he took off towards his trailer. Anything was better than feeling this way in his opinion.

“Jensen? You sure you’re feeling okay? You look a little flushed. Hey! Jens- Where are you going? We gotta do another take. Jensen?!”

Once he was back behind his trailer door he immediately stripped off all his clothes and tossed them in a pile. Nothing sounded more appealing than a cold shower. He relished in the feeling of the cool spray as it cascaded down his body. Jensen propped his arm against the shower wall and rested his head against it. He needed to figure out how to suppress his feelings because he didn’t think he could go through this every day.

Ten minutes later he cut the water off and shoved the shower curtain back. A wall of steam enveloped the bathroom and water droplets clung to Jensen’s skin. He wrapped one of his burgundy towels around his waist and padded back into his kitchen to grab another beer.

“Hey, Jens.”

He didn’t expect to hear another voice coming from his living room area, and he definitely didn’t expect it to be Misha’s. He nearly jumped out of his skin as he whirled around.

“Jesus, Mish! What the hell?!”

Misha stood and walked across the room not stopping until he was mere inches from him. Jensen swallowed thickly looking down at the neck of the beer bottle to try and distract himself.

“Why are you avoiding me, Jay? Jared says you’re not, but I can tell you are. You’ve barely said two words to me today other than when we filmed that scene. Even then, I could tell something was wrong. You rarely break character.”

Jensen shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Mish I … It’s not that simple. Y-You didn’t do anything wrong … I just … I can’t do this.”

Misha grabbed his arm before he could get away and pressed him against the wall. The way Jensen’s breath hitched didn’t go unnoticed to him, and that only confirmed his suspicions.

“Can’t do what Jay?”

Jensen inhaled sharply, the smell of Misha’s cologne nearly making him moan.

“Wha - What are you doing?!”

Misha rested a hand on Jensen’s chest. The water droplets still lingered and he could feel the rapid beat of his heart against his palm.

“Shh. Just relax Jay. Just let go.”

Jensen closed his eyes shuddering under the warmth of his fingertips.

“I - I don’t know what you’re ta-”

Before he could finish his sentence Misha’s lips were on his. For a split second, all Jensen could do was stand there. Eventually, he threw caution to the wind and began to kiss him back. His lips were pillow-soft and he tasted of spearmint. It was intoxicating, and it only made Jensen more dizzy with want.

Misha tilted his head and licked at Jensen’s bottom lip requesting permission. He granted him access without hesitation groaning as he licked into his mouth. Misha’s knee pressed between his thigh forcing the towel around his waist to come loose. The friction against his dick along with Misha’s perfect lips kissing and licking along his pulse point became his undoing. Jensen wasted no more time contemplating whether he was making a big mistake or not. The hottest man he’d ever laid eyes on was bringing him a pleasure he’d never felt before, and he intended on returning it tenfold.

“Unngh M-Mish… fuck…”

A low growl came from Jensen’s throat as he maneuvered them towards the hallway. His towel lay forgotten on the floor, his hands finding refuge in Misha’s short dark locks. He tore at the slightly shorter man’s shirt trying desperately to remove it. Buttons littered the small space scattering in different directions when it wouldn’t come off fast enough. Misha chuckled and brought Jensen’s head down for another bruising kiss.

“Wardrobe is gonna be pissed you know. That was one of Castiel’s only clean white shirts.”

Jensen worked at his belt and wasted no time in shoving Misha’s slacks down his legs. His mouth watered at the sight of his tented boxers, a noticeable wet spot becoming more prominent from his arousal.

“Don’t care. Wardrobe can take it outta my pay. Need you too bad.”

Misha knew how reserved Jensen was, and the fact that he was unable to speak in full sentences and on the verge of losing control was by far the sexiest thing he’d ever seen. Slowly Misha sank to his knees and looked up at Jensen through his long lashes. He wetted his lips placing open-mouthed kisses on his thighs. Jensen whimpered shamelessly when Misha licked a long stripe up the underside of his erection. Before he could process what was happening, Misha took him deep into his mouth and didn’t stop until he hit the back of his throat.

“F-Fuck! Christ, Misha... “

Misha couldn’t get enough of how Jensen tasted. It reminded him of sandalwood and old spice. He stripped off his boxers and began palming his cock, moaning at the way Jensen was coming undone by his mouth alone.

“Fuck Jay, you taste so good. Wanna feel you cum baby. Wanna taste every last drop of that sweet nectar.”

Jensen was so close he could taste it. The heat coiled in his lower belly, and his hands instinctively came out to grasp the back of Misha’s head. His rhythmic thrusts soon became more erratic as the first waves of his orgasm washed over him.

“Oh fuck! Mish, I’m gonna… fuck I-I’m gon- ah!!!”

Jensen watched as Misha swallowed around him making sure not to miss a single drop. He stood, pressing his lean body against his leaving a trail of kisses along his jaw.

“Such a good boy Jay. You taste so good too.”

Jensen’s breathing was ragged as he came down from his high. His eyes were closed and his cock was still rock hard. He was a goddamn goner. Never in his life had he came that hard, not until Misha anyway.

Mere minutes later, Jensen was sprawled out on his bed. Misha was rooting around in his drawers for something, and soon he realized what it was. His eyes went wide at the small bottle of lube and the predatory look in his co-star’s eyes.

“Mish, I… I’ve never…”

Misha silenced him with a sweet kiss to his lips.

“I know baby, don’t worry okay? I’m gonna make sure you’re nice and prepared for me. Gonna make you feel so good, Jay. Can’t wait to hear those pretty moans made just for me.”

The sound of the bottle cap opening filled the room and soon Misha was coating his fingers with the shiny liquid. He leaned his body over Jensen’s, resting his weight on one arm. The other slid between his bow legs finding his entrance with ease. Jensen sucked in a breath as Misha pressed one digit against his opening.

“Shh, baby you gotta relax for me. Just breathe, Jay. Let me in and I’ll show you how good it feels.”

Jensen opened his eyes and was met with Misha’s lust-blown ones. He let out a shaky breath, and let his mouth fall open as Misha eased in his finger. He eased it in and out slowly creating a steady rhythm. It wasn’t painful, but it was definitely foreign. Soon Misha slid in another finger and curled them upwards searching out his prostate. He knew he’d found it when Jensen’s back arched off the bed and the prettiest moan he’d ever heard fell from his lips.

“Mmmm, Jay… I wanna taste you. Get on all fours baby. Gonna show you how good it feels to be worshiped.”

Jensen flipped over on his belly and gripped onto his pillow. Misha hooked his fingertips into the place where his thighs met his hips and pulled him so his ass was presented to him nicely.

“So beautiful... “

Misha placed a hand on each side of his ass and spread him open. Jensen dipped his head low and groaned when he felt the wetness of Misha’s tongue against his hole lapping at him repeatedly. He could feel the familiar heat in his core and began fisting his cock furiously.

“Oh God… Mish! Please… p-please need to feel you…”

Misha pulled away, his chin glistening with saliva. He turned Jensen over so he was laying on his back again. He pushed two fingers back inside him and began to scissor him open gently. His mouth leaving love bites along Jensen’s inner thighs.

“Gotta get you ready for me baby. Don’t wanna hurt you any more than necessary.”

Soon Misha was three fingers deep and Jensen was wantonly meeting every thrust. He could almost cum like this. Watching his best friend coming undone by his hands alone. It was almost too much.

“Please f-fuck me… please! Need you. Fuck Misha please!”

Misha removed his fingers and slicked his cock up with lube. He once again leaned over Jensen and captured their lips in a heated kiss. He knew this would hurt, so he did his best to distract him from the pain. Pressing firmly against his fluttering hole, he sheathed himself inside him. Both of them moaned obscenely at the sensation, and Misha tried not to cum at the way Jensen’s muscles squeezed him deliciously. After a few seconds, he felt the Texan’s nails scrape bluntly against his chest.

“Fuck me, Mish… Wanna feel everything you’ve got.”

Misha growled and pulled out almost completely, before slamming back into him. Jensen threw his head back and gripped the sheets, not caring that his sinful moans filled his trailer. They built up a steady pace, and both were well aware that people walking by could tell what was going on. Soon Misha’s brutal thrusts became more sporadic. His forehead rested against Jensen’s as his cock pounded into his prostate over and over again.

“Fuck Mish, You’re gonna make me cum again… c’mon baby, fill me up. Wanna feel you cum inside me. Fuck baby, just like that...Oh, God!”

Misha swallowed his moans with a heated kiss. Jensen could feel his second orgasm of the day approaching as Misha continued to fuck into him. He began to stroke his cock feverishly, his walls tightening around Misha’s dick as the first spurts of white coated his belly.

“F-FUCK MISHA!!”

Misha wasn’t far behind, filling him up, as he felt Jensen’s walls clamp around his cock. They stayed like that, chests heaving, and beads of sweat covering their bodies. Slowly Misha pulled out and grabbed the nearest article of clothing to clean them up.

He climbed back on the bed and laid next to Jensen nuzzling into his neck. He felt the warmth of his arms snake around his torso and hold him close.

“Fuck, that was amazing..” Jensen purred.

Misha peppered kisses along his pulse point and raked his nails lightly down his back.

“You did so well for your first time, Jay. I’m so proud of you. Took me so well.” Misha said tiredly.

Jensen felt his breathing even out, and soon light snores fell from his lips. It was hard to believe how fast he was falling for this man, but he couldn’t wait to see where they’d take their newfound relationship. Whatever happened, he knew he would be along for the ride.

[67midnightwriter]

The Moment I Knew

A/N: Please enjoy this little one shot I’ve been messing with these past few days. Beta’d by the ever wonderful @sculptorofbeginnings

Angst/Fluff

Misha Collins x Reader

Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence and Death

W/C: 2172

Summary: It started out as a secret and it grew, as secrets often do.

You shifted in your seat, trying to blend in and look like just another fan. You smiled as they played his theme song, biting back a laugh while he sent you text after text as though he wasn’t currently holding up an entire convention. These were the moments you cherished, when he made you feel like the only person in world. They were fleeting, few and far between, but you burned every single one to your memory, like a tattoo on your heart that might fade in time but would be with you always.

When he came out on stage his eyes found yours, as if they were drawn by a magnetic pull. He gave a knowing wink, and you couldn’t help but grin as the girls on either side of you squealed in delight. Misha launched into a story about your morning adventures, quite literally running into a protest downtown, awestruck at how he dove headfirst into the cause, somehow scrounging up poster board and markers; easily coercing you into making signs with him with the promise of an extra large morning latte. When things had gotten too heated for your liking, you had grabbed Misha’s hand and led him away to the coffee shop on the corner.

You looked around as Misha began taking fan questions, and that’s when you saw his face. It jumped out at you from the crowd, causing your heart to palpitate in your chest, though you weren’t sure why. A few more questions were answered as you flipped through memories, trying desperately to figure out why this stranger was making your skin crawl and tingle in anticipation.

He stood up, a tan trench coat that was two sizes too big swaying as he made his way to the middle isle that led to the main stage. As soon as you saw the frayed and stained bottoms, everything clicked into place. The world slowed down as you jumped out of your chair, fear radiating off of your body as your eyes caught the glint of a gun you knew wasn’t a cosplay prop; he was the man that Misha had gotten into a fight with at the protest, and while you had brushed off his death threats there, now they seemed impossibly tangible.

The entire audience went silent as he said Misha’s name, stopping him mid sentence. The metallic click of the safety reverberated through the auditorium, urging you forward. You began to run as Misha dropped his microphone, all the color draining from his face while he took slow, unsteady steps backward. Someone screamed as he cocked the gun, and you stepped in front of it just as he began to aim.

“Don’t do this.” For a second the voice in the air didn’t register as your own. It was strong and steady, the exact opposite of how you felt currently. “You don’t want to do this.”

“Oh sweets, I think I really want to do this. Now move.”

You looked him directly in the eyes. They were a cloudy gray, hazy and rimmed in red. His pupils were dilated, and you realized that he was terrified as well. When you didn’t move he tried to aim the gun over your shoulder, but you wrapped your hands around the cold barrel and you pressed it to your chest.

“If you are going to kill anyone in this building, it’s going to be after you kill me.” He paused, his attention turning from you to Misha. His eyes bore into yours, confusion washing over them; you had caught him off guard, and now he wasn’t sure how to continue. People were now streaming out of the room, and you could tell he was getting flustered, his plan now thrown out the window. “If you are going to shoot anyone, it’s going to be me. After you watch the light fade from my eyes, feel my body go weak and useless against yours, then you can decide if you want to pull this trigger again while it’s facing another person.”

He swallowed hard. You felt his grip on the gun loosen momentarily, his hands starting to shake as the realization of the true consequences of his actions were catching up in his head. He looked over your shoulder, glancing at Misha once more. You could see in the reflection of the projector screen in his glasses that Misha was frozen, watching you with an open mouth and a pale face, resisting as Cliff tried to pull him backstage.

The lights in the auditorium went off. The gunshot seemed to echo forever. Screams harmonized as you swayed on your feet. The pain wasn’t instant. The gun was suddenly heavy in your hands as he dropped it, and you heard him fall as he backed away from you, semi-coherent apologies streaming from his lips. The front of your shirt was hot and sticky as you stepped backwards until your back hit the wooden base of the stage. You slid to the floor as the lights came back on.

Misha dropped to the ground beside you. He pulled you close, squeezing as though he was trying to hold you together. The gun fell from your hands as you reached for him, clutching the front of his t-shirt with whatever grip you could muster. One hand traveled to his cheek, forcing his gaze from your chest to your face.

“Misha, I-” Your voice shook. Tears began to spill from broken blue eyes.

“No, don’t say it.” His lip quivered.

“I love-” The edges of your vision were beginning to darken.

“Y/N please, I need you.” His voice cracked.

“You.” You closed your eyes, and he screamed.

Misha jumped as Jensen wrapped an arm around his shoulder. His touch pulled Misha from the memory, and after a few blinks the red faded from his shaking hands, the weight of your body in his arms a ghost once more. He swallowed hard past the lump in his throat, turning his attention once more to the fan that had asked the question.

He brought it upon himself, doing an interview three months after the incident when the fandom was buzzing with rumors you didn’t deserve. The headline still sat on the their coffee table, staring at him on calm nights while Vicki worked on her new book and he tried to think about anything other than what had happened; ‘Misha Collins and the fan that saved his life: “I loved her.”’ He hoped that he had done you justice.

Now, six months later, the first convention was harder than anyone had imagined.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t-” The fan backtracked.

“No, that’s okay. It’s a long story, so I’ll give you the cliff notes.” Misha took a deep breath, and Jensen squeezed his shoulder for support. “She strode onto set her first day with a confidence that I could only ever wish to have. She was wild, constantly pushing me past limits and somehow finding the best in every situation. She felt like sunshine and-” He paused, tears burning his eyes again as her memory danced behind his eyes.

“She was made for Misha.” Jensen interjected. “We could all see it. Vicki even started calling her his ‘set wife’ after her first visit for the new season.” Jensen’s laugh eased a bit of the pain that weighed heavy on Misha’s chest.

“It’s funny, when you think you have so much time with a person you waste it. You let precious days slip through your fingers like they’re never ending, when in reality-” Another pause, another shaky breath- “I refused to let myself feel what I should have been feeling all along. I hid her away like my own little secret, because I was scared of getting hurt. I put up walls that she didn’t deserve, and on this side of things I realize that I wasn’t shutting her out, but I was locking myself up. What’s the difference betweens walls keeping out the world and fencing yourself in anyways?” He bit his lip, turning to look at Jensen before continuing. “That moment, when she stood so strong in front of that gun for me, when she could have slipped away with the crowd and no one would have even questioned it, that’s the moment I knew I loved her.”

“Did you ever try and find her afterwards?”

“There was a bomb that went off in the lobby. A lot of pandemonium that day, and there was a mixup in with what hospital she was taken to. The last I heard she was pronounced dead in the ambulance-” Misha’s voice cracked again, and he bit his lip.

“Misha looked. We all did. We spent weeks calling all the hospitals in the area, searching for her by name, looking for Jane Does… It seems like something that could only happen in the movies, but she was gone.”

The crowd gasped, and for a second Misha’s skin prickled as panic started to spread. The memory threatened to break through again, the real world in front of him blurring as he started to lose his grip on what was here and now and what was in the past. Jensen laid his hand on Misha’s forearm, squeezing it and grounding him with the sensation. He could still hear her voice saying his name, and he shook his head, ready to leave the panel before he lost his control in front of the crowd.

“Misha.”

He looked up, sure that he was hearing a ghost, but there you were on the other end of the stage. You were tucked protectively beneath Jared’s arm, standing between him and Vicki, looking impossibly small. Bright red fresh scars peaked out from the dip in your shirt, and you had lost weight, but you were there.

Misha’s microphone clattered to the ground. He was on his feet, the sound of his chair falling to the stage causing you to flinch as his legs carried him to you. He wrapped you in his arms, crushing you to his chest as you wrapped your legs around his hips. He kissed you, not caring anymore who saw, or what they thought. Your tears mixed together on his face, hot and wet, and for a moment you  just existed together once more.

“I love you too.” He managed, pressing his lips to whatever skin of yours he could reach while your laughter bubbled out.

“Happy birthday Misha.” Vicki’s hand rubbed circles on his back as she kissed his cheek, and he turned to give her a kiss as well.

“And here I thought you couldn’t out-do last years gift.” Laughter floated through your little group as the crowd behind them cheered, bringing Misha back to down to earth.

He sat you down on the ground, grabbing your hand and lacing his fingers with yours before pulling you up on stage. Jensen followed, a bright grin on his face as Misha sat back down his his chair, pulling you into his lap.

“I’m sorry guys, but I don’t think we’re going to be able to finish this panel without a special guest appearance.”

No one protested.

“Why did you hide?” Misha asked, his thumb caressing your cheekbone as his hand cupped your face. You ran your hands through the hair on his chest, pressing kisses on his hot skin while you tried to work out what you wanted to say.

“I was scared. When this started you told me that you couldn’t love me. Not after what had happened before. I was okay with that for awhile, but somewhere along the line just having you wasn’t enough. I wanted you and Vicki, and the kids. I wanted to be a part of your family.” A tear slipped down your cheek and Misha kissed it away, pulling you closer and nuzzling against your neck. “I didn’t have control of myself and my feelings like I thought I did, and that scared me. You were in control, so I did the only thing I could think to do. I ran.” You could feel Misha’s tears against your neck, and you carded your hand through his hair comfortingly. “I didn’t want to force you to make a decision that you didn’t want to make. Or maybe I was scared of you not making the decision I wanted.”

“I’m sorry.” It was a whisper against your skin, and for a moment you wondered if you heard it or felt it. “I’m sorry for so much Y/N. I’m sorry for-”

You pressed your lips against his, cutting off his apology.

“If I let you continue we are going to be in this bed for another fifteen years.” A sad chuckle escaped his lips before he kissed you again, long and slow.

“Probably.”

Words stopped, and hands spoke. Touches mended cracked souls, lips pressed broken pieces back into place. You relearned each others bodies in the dark, not resting until long after the sunrise burned through the thin hotel curtains.

[proteus-no]

What exactly is going on with supernatural? I’m outside the fandom, but it sounds real exciting... whatever is happening...

brooooo...... SO MUCH is happening right now, so here’s a not quick run down cause I ended up rambling, have fun anon:

- Castiel was introduce 4x01, and from literally the day after, the fandom has been shipping him and Dean together. Cas was planned to be killed off fairly early on, but the fans loved him (and his dynamic/relationship with Dean) so much that the writers kept him around

- Originally a female angel (who Dean had sex with) was supposed to be his guardian angel. But the fans.... 

- And so begins a long and torrid history of Destiel, which personally I have been shipping for 10-11 years, and so have many other fans. There were too many things that added up, like every Cas did, he did for Dean. Like.... literally everything. And somewhere along the way, Misha (Castiel’s actor) started playing Cas like he was in love/pining

- People labeled Jensen as homophobic because he, personally, didn’t headcanon Dean as bisexual (even though most fans did), and got testy and upset with Destiel because fans would harass him over it, which is understandable

- But then season 15 happens

- The writers focused a LOT on Dean and Cas’ (platonic) relationship. And fans were getting hype. They loved it. They were acting like an old married couple and we were living.

- And in 15x10, Dean is high on anesthetics from getting dental surgery, and has a bit where he’s dancing in black and white, and it’s very much a Hayes code thing. And he briefly dances with a lamp (this is where the lamp memes come from). Light fixtures, light in general, and lamps have always been a symbol/stand in for Cas, so every goes nuts

- Also in 15x17, God says that in every other universe, Castiel never disobeys. He saved Dean from hell, then did what he was told. But this universe’s Castiel had a “crack in his chasis” and was the only one who disoeyed. Who rebelled. And now he was outside God’s plan

- And God (Chuck) has always been a stand in for the writers. So Castiel, who was so loved by the fans that he was kept on the show and completely changed their plans, is also outside the writers hands. We all just went  👀 👀 👀 

- And then, on November 5th, 2020, 15x18 airs and the internet loses its collective shit. It doesn’t matter if you were a die hard fan, lost interest along the way,never watched it but was interested, or never had any interest at all, EVERYONE was talking about this episode.

- Because, my dear anon, Castiel explicitly confesses his gay, homosexual love for Dean. 

- Sadly, Death wanted Dean dead for trying to kill her. And there was this entity called the Empty (which everyone calls Turbo Hell) that also wanted Death dead. But the thing is, is that Cas made a deal with the Empty to save his adopted son, Jack, who was trapped there. Jack would get out, but the moment Cas experienced true happiness, the Empty would take Cas.

- So Cas doesn’t want Dean to die. So he starts talking about how Dean is a good person, an amazing man. And fans were like... oh? And he continues, talking about how everything Dean has done, he has done for love, for his love of Sam and Jack, and how he loved the world and wanted to save it. And we’re like Oh????????? and then he says Dean changed him, and that he LOVES Dean. And then we lost out collective shit, and he pushes Dean away and gets eaten by the Empty.

- Everyone started calling Dean and Jensen homophobic because Dean wasn’t reacting much but like???? Home boy was being chased by and about to be killed by Death, and Cas starts saying stuff that no one has ever said to him before (see, Dean hates himself and thinks he corrupts everything he touches), and THEN his best friend (who he thought was straight, amongst other things but I’ll touch on that later) confesses he loves him before promptly dying.

- But the thing is, he was dying from experiencing true happiness, and his happiness was just confessing, not even being reciprocated, which is a huge oof.

- Also everyone not in the fandom conveniently ignores how Dean broke down crying on the floor immediately afterwards.

- But then the behinds the scenes information comes out and OH BOY.

- As it turns out, the actors joined the writers for writing and planning out season 15, and you want to know what was the first thing they wrote for this season?

- Thats right, you guessed it, Cas’ love confession. So they wrote the entire season with he knowledge that Cas is hopelessly in love with, and always has been, in love with Dean.

- I cannot stress this enough, but Cas has always been in love with Dean.

- And in the scene, when Cas pushes Dean away, he leaves a bloody handprint on the location that Cas had branded him when he dragged him up from hell.

- You want to know who gave that suggestion?

- JENSEN “HOMOPHOBIC” ACKLES

- BUT WAIT IT GETS EVEN BETTER

- BECAUSE JENSEN IN A CON SAID THAT HES BEEN PLAYING DEAN, SINCE HE MET CAS, WONDERING IF CAS EVEN FELT LOVE LIKE HUMANS SINCE HE’S A CELESTIAL BEING

- WHICH MEANS DEAN’S BEEN WONDERING IF CAS COULD EVEN LOVE HIM

- AHHHHHH

- THE JACKLES LONGCON FOLKS

- But then the next episode airs, and Dean is in a forward spiral, blacking out drunk. Everythings bad, but Cas and his confession arent really brought up and we’re like?????? ?????

- But the main story, really everything but Cas, gets resolved at the end of the episode.

- But also, the show runners have keeping Misha’s location during filming a secret. So we have no idea if he’s even in the finale. So everyone's obviously going to watch, and hope, that Cas comes back and Dean can finally reciprocate.

- But then the finale airs, and at first we were hopeful. Dean’s room is full of lamps, and Cas’ coat can be seen in the background. We also see an application as a mechanic on his desk. And we’re so hopeful, that Dean is moving on from the hunting life. He’s going to have an actual life

- But then Dean dies, from a fucking juggalo vampire, impaled on a rusty nail (actually its bent rebar, but rusty nail is funnier). During a simple hunt. And Dean doesn't want to be saved, which goes against ALL OF HIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND HIS ARC FROM NOT ONLY THIS SEASON, BUT THE PAST 5 YEARS

- DEAN, WHO IS CALLED A KILLER BY GOD AND SAYS “YOU SEE, THAT’S NOT ME” BECAUSE CAS SAID HE WAS A GOOD PERSON WHO LOVES SO MUCH

- JUST.... DIES.......

- And on top of that, Sam, who’s arc the ENTIRE SHOW has been moving past his toxic co-dependency from his brother and finding his own life just..... doesn't move on...... he spends literally the rest of his life grieving over his brother. Naming his kid after him, the whole shebang.

- And there was this awful “old Sam” who was in really bad make-up and a silver party city wig. it looked so bad.

- And Dean? Up in Heaven? Just drives his car around. Like, that’s it. He learns from Bobby that Cas is out of Turbo Hell and is fixing up heaven with their new God (Jack, which also goes against Castiel’s arc that he isn’t God’s little soldier, he’s his own person, he’s outside God’s plan. And yeah, Jack is God now, and he’s still Cas’ adopted son, but the point still stands that he’s God’s soldier again) and just continues driving until Sam finally dies and comes to heaven.

- Oh and not to mention that Sam’s love interest for the past couple of seasons (Eileen, a deaf woman) is just never mentioned again, even though she was shown to be brought back, and Sam was grief stricken when God snapped everyone out of existence. No, Sam gets a blurry face woman as wife instead, and Eileen is never heard from again.

- So basically the writer taunted us with Cas to get us to watch the finale because they knew we wouldn’t watch if Cas wasn’t in it.

- So even though the show has ended, more news comes out every day. Like, for example, the heavy focus on Sam in finale and lack of acknowledging the homosexual declaration of love was because they wanted to keep the Sam girls and cis white heterosexual audience pleased so they would follow over to CW’s new show, a Walker Texas Ranger reboot staring Jared Padalecki (Sam’s actor)

- It was also brought up that even pre-covid, the show runners didn’t even bother to ask past characters to come on the show for the finale, even though they said they wanted to have a big scene with all of Sam and Dean’s found family showing up in heaven (including the band Kansas, and I find the implication that the Winchester’s killed them is hilarious) but yeah. They never even asked.

- Jensen also asked a crew member to record the scene on his phone while they were filming, so it has all the cut content. And like Jensen, release the tapes.

- Misha also made a tweet linking an article about how to tell if nuts are rancid, highlighting that it leaves a bad taste in your mouth

- There’s a lot of other stuff that happened, but I’m forgetting

- But RECENTLY both the latin America and indian dub of 15x18 was released and more information came out.

- For example, Dean was originally supposed to scream Cas’ name that it could be heard from blocks away.

- But the BIG news is that, okay in the American version, Dean says “Do do this, Cas” as in, don’t sacrifice yourself. But the lips movements never really lined up.

- However, in the LA version, Dean says “y yo a ti, Cas” which translates to “And I you, Cas”, and in the Indian version, it’s translated to “I’m yours, Cas.”

- AND HOLY SHIT

- DEAN ACTUALLY CONFESSES HE LOVES HIM BACK

- AND JENSEN’S LIP MOVESMENTS WOULD LINE UP MORE WITH “I’M YOURS” OR “AND I YOU” THAN “DON’T DO THIS”

- So basically Destiel is not only canon, but RECIPROCATED, but like, only in Spanish, but hey, we’ll take what we can get.

- AND THEN Misha releases a video that’s summed up to “It was a rogue translator, blah blah blah” and just seemed like CW was holding a gun to his head to do damage control

- Everyone was pissed for like .2 seconds but then Misha immediately apologizes and goes to his replies and has been talking with fans about why they’re upset, and just genuinely just learning about the strife and anger people are feeling. It’s big “Dad trying to understand his kid’s problems at school” vibes. 

- And Jensen has been radio silent the entire time even though it’s obvious CW has been trying to get their actors to quell the fans, and honestly he stan a king.

And that’s what you missed, pretty much. But new information is coming out every day, so periodically send asks and I’ll update you on this shitshow, anon

[hitmeupaep]

sometimes i think i’m being over dramatic about jensen and misha than i remember jensens reaction to misha “stripping” versus jared “stripping” and i realize i’m not crazy