#tg drone
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kapitein-oranghien-29 Ā· 2 years ago
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Well, of the characters I've seen so far, drone seems like he'd be pretty likely to eat someone. All kinds of new traits from that experimentation may have given him a bigger hunger, that long tongue of his wrapping around prey and pulling them into his gullet. And if he's growing whenever he eats something I imagine the bigger he gets the bigger meals he'd need.. >//_//<
Sounds like you would provide him with that anon, hmm? Watch out, you might get the same fate as those snacks (ļ½”ā€¢Ģ€į“—-)āœ§
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kapitein-oranghien-29 Ā· 1 year ago
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IT'S TG DRONE (Ā“āŠ™Ļ‰āŠ™`)ļ¼
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Threatened @kapitein-oranghien-29 with drawing his character Drone sometime and then I found out it was his birthday today, so here's a sketch I whipped up.
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postpunkindustrial Ā· 8 months ago
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1991 issue of Bear Magazine talking about Throbbing Gristle and Coil.
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fanterfane Ā· 4 months ago
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Kittydrone Fayne! (Fanart)
Uncensored: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/57439090/ Fayne had been searching for extra curricular activities while at college, but hadn't gotten very far with many of the clubs he'd been trying. Until one day he saw a poster on campus for Gato Group, a club of cat lovers! He'd never really been that much into cats, being a dog person, but Fayne figured that cat people are probably pretty easy to talk to, right? You have to break out of your comfort zone somehow! Besides, who wouldn't wanna hang out with a bunch of cute fluffy kittens!? Fanart for the wonderfully talented Swirly Bunny, based on her comic featuring the Mewostress's kitty kattification mind control devices! This is the first ever official appearance of Fayne in his youngest form. 20 years old, and freshly moved to the city for college! How's it feel to see him BEFORE the pony tail? Probably pretty strange lolll
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itsmetord Ā· 4 months ago
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What If Corey Riffin Transform into uzi doorman
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spilladabalia Ā· 1 year ago
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T.G. Olson - III
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tgcg Ā· 8 months ago
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the master baiter
TG: dont be mad
TG: ok thats like asking water not to be wet but
CG: WATER ISN'T FUCKING WET GOD DAMMIT.
TG: look whatever remember when you said you would die for me
TG: is that karkat in the room with us right now
======
CG: I'M DYING "FOR YOU" EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU PEEL OPEN THOSE SHIT-EATING LIPS YOU KEEP PULLED TAUT OVER YOUR DRONING IGNORANCE SHAFT.
TG: heheheh
======
CG: YOUR WORDSLUDGE SPEARS EVERY PARTICLE OF MY BODY WITH PINPOINT STRIDERIAN IDIOCY.
TG: oh shit here we go
CG: A VERBAL BARRAGE THAT PULVERIZES MY FLESH INTO A FINE RED MIST, KILLING ME INSTANTLY. WIPING ME THE FUCK OUT, TO SUCH AN INCREDIBLE DEGREE THAT PALEONTOLOGISTS CAN'T FULLY DISCERN IF A "KARKAT" FUCKING EXISTED IN THE FIRST PLACE.
CG: THEY'D BE SCRATCHING THEIR NUGBONES OVER IT FOR FUCKING SWEEPS, IF NOT FOR THE SHOCKING REALIZATION MERE MINUTES INTO THEIR DEBATES THAT NOBODY ACTUALLY GAVE A SHIT.
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CG: AND YET THE TEMPORAL DEVICE STILL SWAYS TO AND FRO IN CONSTERNATION. VEXED BY THE COMPLETE MENTAL VACANCY PUT BEFORE IT BY MY HUMBLE SACRIFICE, BOUND BY ITS COSMIC ROLE, BEGRUDGED BY MY UNSOLICITED DEATH CLOCKING IT INTO OVERTIME. IT HAS BETTER SHIT TO DO, GOD DAMMIT! IT HAS A LUSUS AND A HIVE TO GET BACK TO!
CG: "WHAT IS THIS. WHO LET THIS ASSHOLE IN HERE," IT SAYS. THEY AREN'T EVEN QUESTIONS, JUST ORBITAL SIGHS OF AN UNCARING UNIVERSE. A REALITY NOW KEENLY AWARE OF ITS OWN LAUGH TRACK.
CG: AND ITS PENDULUM TEETERS, TENTATIVE IN ITS OWN DISBELIEF AND PROFOUND APATHY.
TG: damn
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CG: "THIS SCUMBAG ISN'T EVEN GODTIER YET," IT POINTS OUT. THE AUDIENCE FLIPS THEIR COLLECTIVE SHIT, AGHAST AT THIS REVELATION.
TG: hahaha
CG: IT WELLS UP SUCH A THRUM OF FUCKING ENNUI THAT THE TIMEPIECE FLIPS OFF-KILTER, LANDING SQUARELY IN THE "DUMBASS" ZONE WITH A "FUCK IT" LOUD ENOUGH TO REVERBERATE THROUGHOUT PARADOX SPACE.
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CG: IT THEN ELECTS TO KICK MY PATHETIC FUCKING HALF-CORPSE BACK INTO THE LIVING PLANE AND FORCE ME, VENGEFULLY FROM THE AUDACITY OF MY OWN IDIOCY, TO REPEAT THIS CYCLE AD NAUSEAM
CG: UNTIL EXISTENCE ITSELF FINALLY CROAKS UNDER THE COMBINED WEIGHT OF OUR COLOSSAL STUPIDITY.
CG: BECAUSE WHO THE FUCK WOULD I BE IF I EVER GOT TO HAVE A BREAK?
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TG: yep there he is thats him offincer
TG: the man after my own heart
TG: thats a karkat brand "soft yes" if i ever heard one and i know my karkatisms dude im a goddamn graduate in karkatology
TG: i got my degree in this shit
TG: im rocking up to our convos with the dumbass black square hat thing cocked 45 degrees
TG: literally incapable of snapping it back kinda by design of the stupid thing but damn if im not doing it anyways im emanating the snappitudes
TG: im rocking my intelligence right now
TG: also water is absolutely wet dude its like the wettest thing on the planet
CG: I'M NOT REPEATING MYSELF AGAIN
TG: yeah you are
CG: FUCK. I AM.
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CG: I SAID THE LAST THREE TIMES IT'S A CONDITIONAL TERM--
TG: and im saying its common sense like being wet isnt conditional when youre the perpetual thing of wettening
CG: NO
TG: and brother it is THE wet
TG: like following your conditional argument
TG: if water isnt wet then the other water molecules are constantly making each other fuckin wet so its a moot point
TG: great philosophical debate
TG: which came first the water or the wet?
CG: DAVE
TG: think about it all those particles are wetting each other up all the time and shit
TG: its a fucked up display
CG: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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TG: pretty much a perpetual orgy of the elements
CG: DUDE.
TG: that sounds kinda sick actually if you dont think about what it means
TG: h2orgy
CG: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO VETO THIS STUPID DISCUSSION--
TG: tell me im wrong dude
CG: I'M UNIVERSE-APPOINTED TO HOVER AROUND YOU POINTING OUT EVERY DUMBASS TAKE YOU HAVE FOR THE REST OF TIME.
TG: thats so beautiful to me
TG: i could cry
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kapitein-oranghien-29 Ā· 10 months ago
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uhm, is that a pregnant Wario on your ref sheet?
Yes, yes, it is. To show I'm down for all the good ideas. I get too a lot of 'what's the weirdest thing you've ever drawn', probably because this think I'd be scared or disgusted by the awesome idea they have in their head. Oh, here was a fun idea;
It involved TG drone pumping a dude full of cum and eggs and that poor poor human changing mweheh (Ėµ Ķ”Ā° ĶœŹ– Ķ”Ā°Ėµ) more under cut, if thouth dareth
The idea is similar to the womb tattoos you see in MPREG art but anyway, It is like the eggs sit in his stomach and the stomach will grow as the eggs do because they're soft and can absorb nutrients. we're talking about someone that Drone kidnapped here not Drone himself, by the way. And his new petā€™s internal systems begin to change. The muscle mass increase so the body can support its new giant growing dick and balls. The balls still produce cum sort of but itā€™s a lot of extra fluid for the main process. The change of the insides essentially changes the internal organs from being able to make piss as a waste system into the penis into essentially a birthing canal. So like one chamber lower than the stomachā€¦ I know hang in there it will get way worse partnerā€¦
And when itā€™s time Drone fully stimulates his incubator by having his toy sit on his giant cock and wrapping his tongue around and inside their mouthHeā€™s fucking their now super enlarged prostate while holding them in a place like a toy with his giant arms. And his tongue is easing his swollen eggs next to the walls where his cock can be felt.Ā 
Droneā€™s children start small with tails so when they begin to hatch they swirl and swim in the ā€œcumā€ formed by those new balls. You can see the toyā€™s giant ballsack writhing with their kidsDrone is focused on pressing against his toy's insides with his eggs until each one has hatched and theyā€™re all safely in the lower chamber. The cock itself looks so similar to wellā€¦a giant cock. Bigger than Drones' dick actually itā€™s half the size of the giant and if it didnā€™t have a foreskin beforehand it has one now. The head is huge and fat and glistening and the urethra has been built up with muscle now with three ringed sections dividing the beast. Each section is capable of contracting and pumping so they can help their children come out into the worldā€¦ Once his kids are in the ballsack Drone retracts his tongue from his crying toy (tears of joy, pain, lust whatever you fancy XP) and rolls a special dose of pheromones from his pits up to his lips before kissing his toy and triggering the most mind breaking intense orgasm of their life.
He withdraws his tongue to snake it across his toyā€™s writhing body while they go insane from the pleasure and stop making human noises entirely. He teases and prods his kids from the outside and encourages them to swim through the tunnel and follow the liquid to the exit
The slit itself is at first tightly closed but just larger like the dick itā€™s on until one baby gets there and with a jolt like blowing a load it opens and the child forces its way out. Bc the kid is larger than the hole itā€™s both painful the way it stretches and so fucking intensely good that the toy cums again and again. Any observer could see how deformed the end of the toy's giant cock is and could track the wriggling children as they escape. And in the case of a hatchling being stuck, Drone cums a healing hormone into his toy and pulls his cock out before walking around to the front. Similar to a gaping asshole or wide open birth canal the slit is just open for the world to look inside its now oozing tunnel. Drone gets on his knees and slides that masterful tongue inside to its furthest reaches (making his toy cum mindlessly again even more) and scoops his last kid out.
When done, the toy is physically exhausted but still leakingā€¦ well itā€™s not exactly cum anymore after those changes to its body and the kids can lap up their milk. And then bam Drone has a new incubator ready to go for as long as they can hold out. No longer human and desperately craving for the intense feeling of being full and cumming that hard again they canā€™t ever go back to their old lives fully corrupted by Drones musk and mutationsā€¦.
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old-memoria Ā· 1 year ago
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But nothing comes close to a drone hitting a neighbouring house 2 days ago
it's been raining the whole fucking week im done with it
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blankandhappytales Ā· 1 year ago
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Masterlist of stories and flash fiction..
It's about time I got up off my butt and put together an easy to reference list. I'll improve the tags and descriptions in the future, but for now these are all the ones I could find in my search for all my pieces. šŸ˜
New(ish):
Untilted (I'll get round to it!): You could save your friend from being turned into a drone, but why bother when you know she'll be so much hotter as one?
A Change in Perspective: (Slow corruption, tech control, chipped, masturbation, second tense) - You find yourself implanted with a control chip, but every attempt to get it removed just seems to slide out from between your fingers. All is Fair in Love & Hypnotism: (Slice of life, humour, hypnosis, self-care) - A Domme decides to lightly punish her sub for not taking care of herself.
All that Glitters: (Forced femme, rubber, tech-control) - Finn finds a higher calling beyond corporate sabotage
Bambi:
Bambi Betrayal: (f/f, brainwashing, tech control, betrayal, bambification) - Charity attempts to reason with Lex who is under the control of the Bambi virus.
Family Affair: (f/f, brainwashing, tech control, betrayal, minor incest themes) - Charity introduces the joy of Bambi to the local strip club.
Bambi: Banded: (f/f, brainwashing, tech control, betrayal, forced femme.) - A mind control headband? Why not. All shall be blonde and ditzy!
Betrayal is a Dish Best Served Obediently: (Dollification, tech-control, objectification, betrayal) - Rae discovers what has become of her friend after betraying her to the Dolls.
Bimbo Chip: (Tech-control, chipped, VR, Bimbofication) - Emma surrenders to the chip in the back of her neck.
Broadcast Control: (Tech-control) - The radio station prepares for a very special test broadcast.
Chasing the Score: (Tech-control, subtle indoctrination, gaming. f/f) - Getting the high score can open you up to all sorts of interesting messaging.
Cock goes in: (m/f, conditioning, hypnosis) - Alex has provided a rather more-ish way to empty out her mind.
Cocktails and Broomsticks: (Magic, witchcraft, oral fixation) - Your Mistress decides to have a little fun with you whilst out for drinks.
Cum to the Darkside: (f/f, corruption, betrayal, tech control, twinning) - Do you hope that your best friend would ever betray you to oodles of mind control?
Darkest Desires: (tg, succubus, corruption, enthrallment) - George finds out that being damned has some perks and benefits.
Darkest Desires
Enthralled
Hostile Takeover pt.1
Domestic Bliss: (slice of life, maids, hypnosis, very short, f/f) - A parental visit causes a minor argument between Domme and Sub.
Down Slope Doll: (f/f, headphones, brainwashing, tech-control) - If you go down to the slopes today, be none of your friends have other ideas about having some 'fun' with you.
Droned: (f/f, Hive, Assimilation, tech-control, betrayal) - Mia becomes a little more intimate with the hive than she'd like.
Halfway Down the Stairs: (f/f, headphones, tech-control) - Megan finds just enough of herself to try and sneak out of the brainwashing facility to try and save her friends.
Her Perfect Doll: (Forced femme, hypnosis, Fem Domme) - Finn discovers just how deep his hypnotic conditioning goes.
Factory Reset: (Tech control, robotization, damsel in distress, objectification, female solo.): A nosy reporter find herself on a factory production line after asking too many questions.
Franchised Perfection: (Tech-control, transformation, celebrity, forced fem) - The Kardashian brand finds a fresh, new way to franchise itself to the masses.
Looper: (Tattoo, self-induction): A very special tattoo helps Melissa see the hypnotic side of life.
Mal-Adjusted: (Tech control, hypno-virus, corruption, female solo, betrayal): Cassie finds herself under assault by a powerful computer virus hell bent on spreading it's influence.
Nesting Instincts: (Tentacles, corruption, transformation, breast growth, Hive) A researcher is given a fresh purpose when captured by a tentacle nest.
Perfect Pink Kitty: (rubber, slice of life(ish), kitty ears, tech control) - Jake starts to regret agreeing to playing with Jamie as his insecurities get the better of him, but the cute kitty ears he's wearing have other ideas.
Positive Reinforcement: (f/f, slice of life, hypno-positivity) - Martha has a novel way of helping to convince Aya that her coursework really should get done. Repetition Knows Best: (f/f, slice of life, mind control, hypnosis) - Ella toys with her friends mind, building on all the ground work she's laid so far.
Seductive Reasoning: (f/f, hypnosis, conditioning, cougar seduction) - Melissa finds out she really is into older women.
Sisterhood: (gender neutral, assimilation, transformation, bimbofication) - You've been targeted for Bimbofication. Resistance is futile.
Switching Off: (masturbation, headphones, self-conditioning, very short) - Anna helps herself become even more enamored with her Bimbo conditioning.
Symbosis: (conditoning, bimbotization) - Willow learns to accept a new mindset.
The Human Element: (tech-control, objectification, robotization, dollification) - Sometimes it's the human element of your newly minted doll which proves problematic.
The Bonding: (Tentacles, hentai, kidnapping) - If you go down to the woods today... Remember to close your windows, okay? Okay! Their are things that go squelch in the woods, otherwise.
Workplace Distraction: (m/f, very short, work place fun) - Who doesn't want to get hypno-triggered like a good little corporate drone?
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compacflt Ā· 1 year ago
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hi! im learning so much from your blog and its endlessly fascinating to me, im not american so i knew next to nothing about the us military before getting into tg (still dont know that much but. more than before), i never cared about or defined myself by us political terms but now i really want to know and understand the tg characters and its fascinating to me how much politics is a part of that, so thank you for sharing your views on that on here, id be lost without them!
(i havent read your fic yet because idk if im emotianally ready for it yet but when i do. im sure its gonna be great)
haha I do sort of worry that Iā€™ve made top gun too political. I think Iā€™ve always just been trying to come to terms with the fact thatā€¦ top gun wasnā€™t really made for me.
I saw Top Gun: Maverick for the first time in a movie theatre in rural southern Oregonā€¦. Which, if youā€™re not American/didnā€™t know, is a part of the country characterized by Jesus-loving gun-toting ā€œpatriots.ā€ The theatre was a full house. Everyone loved TGM. Itā€™s NOT an apolitical movie. It pushes a WWII-era narrative about the ā€œAmerican underdogā€ military that appeals to a certain subset of the population: the military deserves more resources because our heroes are disadvantaged on the battlefield (F-18 vs SU-57), though of course in real life no more than a dozen SU-57s have actually been produced, and American fightersā€¦ donā€™t engage in dogfights anymore. Cain was right, no matter how much TGM wants to sensationalize the adventurism of real life pilots: drone warfare is making extinct manned fighter jets. TGM is geopolitically out of date. ā€”And whether we like it or not, it is straight-up recruiting propaganda. The main emotional thrust of the movie is that we (audience) are supposed to sympathize with Bradley, who wants nothing more than to Join The Navy. We are supposed to be mad at Maverick (and later, conveniently, our scapegoat Carole) for preventing Bradley from Joining The Navy. The story of TGM does not make sense if the Navy isnā€™t the most desirable place to be. Top Gun: Maverick isnā€™t just recruitment MATERIAL; fundamentally it is a recruitment STORY. I feel like thatā€™s an important metatextual aspect to engage with & acknowledge.
Iā€™ve said elsewhere on my blog, the target audience for TGM is Republican dads of teenage boys: men who were teenagers when the first Top Gun came out, and have that nostalgia for a more dangerous/more exciting military, and are in the position to influence their sons to join up. The Navy would not have let Tom Cruise et al rent their $20,000-an-hour-operating-cost airplanes if that werenā€™t the case. Top Gun wasnā€™t really made for people like me.
Obviously how people in fandom engage with the source text is their decision. But engaging with Top Gun & Top Gun: Maverick is to engage with the Reagan-era reactionary, hawkish Cold War foreign policy that inspired Top Gun (the 1981 Gulf of Sidra incident really springs to mindā€”it wouldā€™ve been in the minds of many people watching Top Gun in 1986), and then the subsequent NOSTALGIA for that time period that inspired Top Gun: Maverick. Theyā€™re not apolitical movies at all; they have an agenda. Itā€™s good to take their agendas seriously.
I hope if you read my fics you enjoy them šŸ˜Š
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anglerfishchef Ā· 7 months ago
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zoes anyone kjnow how to get fluids out of clothing. zhey got me doing drone work dawg im cooked.
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šŸ˜ˆ limebloods-exist-deactivated4131111612
tent@bulge fĀ®ā€¢m @ mut@ntblā€¢ā€¢d
šŸ„¶ skibidi-loadgaper-gyattt
THEHEH CONDE5CENCE GOT HEHIS A55
šŸŗ highblooddetector
pāœ“rple6lood
ā™¦ļø moiralleganceofficial
LM7FAāˆ†āˆ†āˆ†
ā€¼ļø stroking-my-tentabulge-olive
YOU GUYS KNOW THAT. MOIRALLEGANCE OFFICIAL IS THE HEIR RIGHT????
šŸ’„ hoopthrowball-sized-shameglobes
-+-+TGĀ£Y &RĀ£NT Ā£VĀ£N DĀ£&CTIV&TĀ£D ITS JUST THĀ£IR URL IM SHITTING MYSĀ£LF+-+-
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šŸ©¶ xxtant-blood-xxxxxs-deactivated1205726
im a member of the skibidi goon
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bear-man74 Ā· 4 months ago
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Creating a sys cheat sheet. Don't mind me.
Huh. I'm labeled as potato.
Travel.. isn't that what i do? Out of body experiences whenever I want and controlling my vision like a drone? Sure I'm linked to this body and can't escape but i can see in any angle any direction from any height. I can phase through walls. Shit. Maybe i am in the same bote..
Soulbond.. so partly realistic but not fully.. cool.
Headmates? Ohh partners who met inside the head.. that took a bit to figure out.. so that's just sys members..
Facet? I should come back to this one. It just sounds like kin again
Amnesiac barriers.. that just sounds like slero.. or sif..
Comm b. Just sounds like a worse version.. all emotions gone? Yikes..
TG? Like endo? Oh wait. Endo isn't always?!
Sisa.. oh. Wow that's so simple.. just subsystems..
Same as cluster.. so simple.. wow.
That's a funny looking symbol.. trebelsand..
Quoi is dont care, crypto is do care. Got it.
Con is just hard to follow
Para and tulpa are going over my head. I must be eepy..
Oh hey! Multigenic! That's the one that I kept accidentally making when trying to make a dendrophiliac flag.
Pangenic.. so.. just religion. Okay..
Polygenic is the everything bagel
Icosce is hurting my brain.. I'll come back to it
Dawn and twilum.. uhhh.. idk
Oh. It's 11. Time is up. Time to post page 1.
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metoroidosoreru Ā· 4 months ago
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Altar of Plaguesā€™ Teethed Glory & Injury is one of the best metal releases of all time, perfectly showcasing how raw production and harsh sounds can be utilized in such a way that they can produce profoundly beautiful and emotionally resonant music.
There are moments on the album that are cinematic, oppressively heavy, dissonant, somber, and triumphant. Itā€™s a difficult listen if youā€™re not in a good headspace but worthwhile if you love music in any genre and want to have a listening experience that will challenge preconceived notions of the genre. I liken it to watching a dark or sad movieā€”itā€™s a cathartic experience and a fantastic musical palette cleanser.
The performances showcased on TG&I arenā€™t technically impressive but the way the jagged guitars, droning synths, cacophonic and atmospheric tremolo-picked ambient strings and ghoulish howls, growls and screams come together are composed and produced keep the listener engaged and enticed. Itā€™s a sound that is unique to Altar of Plagues; they convey emotions of despair, anguish and grief through musicality and cryptic lyricism in a way that I havenā€™t heard from any other artist.
And Iā€™m not praising them just because itā€™s dark, heavy music. Music doesnā€™t always have to be serious or ā€œbrutalā€ or an impressive artistic showcase to be good or enjoyable (looking at you, metal gatekeepers) but a group of musicians being able to convey such heavy emotion with the grace and proficiency that is showcased on TG&I makes it an electrifying album and an entirely unique release compared to Altar of Plaguesā€™ peers in the same genre.
This album is a very rare 10/10 for me, and given that the band has been long broken up Iā€™m sad that I wonā€™t be able to hear future releases from them. Throughout their career Altar of Plaguesā€™ sound had evolved with each subsequent release, with each being a masterpiece in their own right. Among them, Teethed Glory & Injury stands out to me as their magnum opus and it being their final release feels like the perfect swan song for a band that consistently pushed the boundaries of atmospheric/post-black metal.
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tgcg Ā· 1 year ago
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argument
its a big one
TG: alright this is probably a bust
TG: more i think about it how the fuck do you even make a marinara
TG: can i even alchemise cheese or do i gotta like alchemise the milk and curdle it myself
TG: how do you even curdle
====================
TG: make a goddamn
TG: curgler
TG: whatever
TG: internet archive gonna pull through
====================
CG: ALRIGHT DAVE
TG: shit
====================
CG: YOU BETTER BACK THE FUCK OFF. I DON'T KNOW WHERE IN BULGEMUNCHING VIRULENT FUCK YOU GET THE IDEA YOU HAVE ANY RIGHT TO TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD THINK ABOUT MY OWN GODDAMN PLANET. SORRY TO HAVE TO DEAL A BLOW TO YOUR IMPOSSIBLY INFLATED FUCKING EGO, BUT HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED THAT YOUR SIDE-EYE SLACKJAW HOPELESS DEADPAN BULLSHIT BEHAVIOUR IS ACTUALLY INCREDIBLY FUCKING CONTEMPTIBLE AND DOESN'T PUT YOU ABOVE OTHER PEOPLE? HAVE YOU CONSIDERED THAT?
CG: OR DID YOU JUST ASSUME FROM THE MOMENT YOU FOUND OUT I'M A REVOLTING FUCKING MUTANT LOWBLOOD FREAK THAT I'M SUDDENLY NOT ALLOWED TO LIKE THE IDEA OF MY LIFE MEANING SOMETHING AT SOME POINT?
TG: okay you are wildly misquoting me where the fuck did that come from
TG: also you scared the hell out of me
TG: im just trying to science some pizza here
====================
CG: OKAY THEN, DAVE! EXPLAIN TO ME AS WELL AS YOUR AMBLING ONE-NOTE SMOOTH EXCUSE FOR A 'THOUGHT'SPONGE CAN
CG: IN SOMEWHAT COHERENT TERMS, ALTHOUGH I KNOW THAT'S A TALL ORDER:
CG: HOW YOU SAYING MY ADOLESCENT DREAMS OF BECOMING A THRESHECUTIONER ARE "FUCKED UP AND IRONIC IN A NASTY ASS WAY" DOESN'T QUALIFY AS UNDERHANDEDLY KICKING ME IN THE MANDIBLE PRONGS!
CG: YOUR AUDIENCE AWAITS YOU WITH BATED BREATH! TAKE IT AWAY, M.C. BRAIN HEMORRHAGE.
====================
TG: okay i dont
TG: know how you got a hold of that phrasing because i said that shit in confidence
TG: get out of my business bro
CG: NEWSFLASH, ASSHOLE: THIS METEOR IS A PHYSICAL, LITERAL LOCATION WE'RE BOTH IN. IT'S NOT A FUCKING PRIVATE CHATROOM. THIS MIGHT BLOW YOUR PITIFUL MIND BUT PEOPLE CAN ACTUALLY HEAR OTHER PEOPLE TALK WHEN THEY HAVE TO SHARE A SPACE! BRO!
TG: ugh
====================
CG: AND IT'S VERY INTERESTING YOU ACCUSE ME OF MISQUOTING YOU, AND THEN SUDDENLY TURN AND SPOUT FROM THAT SHITTY DRONING GROANSHAFT OF YOURS THAT I'M INVADING YOUR PRIVACY WHEN I DIRECTLY QUOTE YOUR SMARMY LITTLE SHAMEGLOBES!
CG: WOW! TURNS OUT KARKAT IS ACTUALLY BEING GENUINELY FUCKING UPSET ABOUT SOMETHING ā€” WHO KNEW, RIGHT? WHO WOULD'VE GUESSED THAT I ACTUALLY HAVE GENUINE COMPLAINTS TO LEVEL AGAINST THE PEOPLE WHO GO SPOUTING HOOFBEASTSHIT ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK TO THEIR ECTOSIBLINGS?
TG: no dude can you shut up a second
CG: I MOST CERTAINLY FUCKING WILL, THANKS FOR THE OFFER! I'M NEVER TELLING YOU A GODDAMN THING AGAIN, SO I HOPE YOU MANAGE TO GAIN SOME WRINKLES TO THAT VESTIGIAL FLAWLESS ORB FLOATING AROUND IN YOUR CAVERNOUS NUGBONE FROM ALL THIS. I HOPE IT WAS WORTH ALL THE EFFORT ON YOUR END.
TG: listen!!!!
====================
CG: MHM! MY AURICULAR CHAMBERS ARE WIDE OPEN!
TG: jegus
TG: okay
TG: i have no defense for my literal phrasing but how expeditiously did you shadowstep the fuck away after i said that
TG: because that is some shrek tier "princess and ugly dont go together" level misrepresentation of my sweet self
TG: like if this wasnt obviously a heated platonic argument we were having i would probably be digging what the reference even if it was a shitty trope
====================
TG: i just
TG: have been thinking about some things and none of those things have got an iota of a thing to do with you or your blood
TG: thing
TG: man
TG: i dont know why you think id be so pressed about your vein juice its like
TG: a normal ass color for a normal ass guy
TG: and obviously it was a major fucking deal from how you talk about it but it doesnt need to be anymore
====================
TG: the thing is i just dont like have the same attitude as you about fighting and stuff and thats not something i am getting into right now but i am gonna make it expressly clear
TG: that its just kind of fucked up for me to sit my ass down and listen to someone spew gold and medals and confetti colored shit going googoo all over tall and loathsome ass bloodletters he never knew
TG: and have him tell me he wants to be the best guy at combat since samurai fuckin jack
TG: and thats my capital B business believe me the emphasis is there
====================
CG: SO IS THIS ABOUT ME WANTING TO BE PART OF SOMETHING YOU DON'T AGREE WITH? BECAUSE THRESHECUTIONERS DON'T EVEN FUCKING EXIST ANYMORE. I LITERALLY COULD NOT DO THIS IF I TRIED AT THIS POINT, SO YOU CAN UNKNOT YOUR ā€œKNIGHTY WHITIESā€ ABOUT IT.
TG: being anti-military is not my point but damn if it isnt a thing thats probably true anyways so good job sleuthing that out
CG: WHAT IS YOUR POINT, DAVE.
TG: bluh
TG: i just said i dont wanna talk about it man
====================
CG: OKAY,
====================
CG: OKAY.
CG: I MEAN. IT FEELS KIND OF IMPORTANT TO THE CONTEXT OF THIS WHOLE UNAMBIGUOUSLY PLATONIC ARGUMENT WE'VE BEEN HAVING
CG: WHICH I'M RELIEVED WE AGREE ON BY THE WAY
CG: BUT IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO KNOW I'M NOT GOING TO WRING IT OUT OF YOU. IT'S FINE.
====================
CG: ā€¦IF YOU DECIDE AT SOME POINT THAT YOU WANT TO TELL ME THOUGH, MY RUMBLE VESSELS ARE STILL OPEN.
TG: i swear youre making those up on the spot at this point
CG: I'M KEEPING MY LANGUAGE'S ART ALIVE, DAVE. IT'S BASIC DECENCY TO THE PLANET THAT RAISED ME.
TG: heh
====================
TG: yknow we got these things called anatomical snuffboxes
TG: its got that right amount of vague nose wrinklage to it that i feel like youd be right at home saying that
TG: snug as a grub even
CG: WHAT PART IS THAT???
TG: its that little weird bone bit that sticks out on the back of your palm when you flex your thumb right
====================
TG: look
CG: HUH. LOOKING AT THAT IS KIND OF WIGGING ME OUT.
TG: yeah its kinda gross rose told me about it
TG: but anyways
====================
TG: are we cool
CG: I MEANā€¦ I GUESS SO. YOU WEREN'T ACTUALLY INSULTING ME, RIGHT?
TG: hell no dude never
CG: OKAY. I COMPLETELY RESCIND THE MYRIAD OF WAYS I JUST INSULTED YOU. AND I'M SORRY.
TG: nah i know its just fluff at this point
====================
CG: I STILL DON'T APPRECIATE YOU TELLING ROSE THINGS I SAY TO YOU IN CONFIDENCE. THAT WAS BETWEEN YOU, ME, AND MY NOW NON-EXISTENT HOME PLANET ROTTING AWAY TO A CRATERED GRAY HUSK IN ANOTHER DEAD UNIVERSE.
TG: i swear that was like the only thing its just that she gets it and i cant keep my mouth from going on about the gettable stuff
TG: they call me the babbling brook the way my flows so audible
TG: i wont do it again
CG: NO,
====================
CG: I GET IT HONESTLY.
CG: I'M BASICALLY THE NUMBER ONE PROPRIETOR OF AIRED GRIEVANCES IN ALL OF PARADOX SPACE AND THEN SOME, AND I'D ALSO BECOME ITS BIGGEST HYPOCRITE IF I HELD IT AGAINST YOU.
TG: thanks
TG: but i mean
TG: at the gigantic risk of sounding uh
====================
TG: ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦..
CG: ?
====================
TG: well
TG: i kinda just think youre better at being a guy to chill out and watch movies with than a guy to tangle fists with
TG: and i dont think theres anything wrong with being that
TG: i think its cool
====================
CG: ā€¦THAT'S AN ALARMINGLY BRAZEN OBSERVATION TO MAKE OF SOMEONE YOU'VE KNOWN FOR ABOUT THE SPAN OF SEVEN SEASONAL EQUINOXES, DAVE.
TG: i dont know what that means but it sure is probably
CG: AM I ALLOWED TO ASK WHAT EVEN GIVES YOU THAT IMPRESSION????
TG: i just got that inkling about you man
====================
TG: and you can do whatever you want with that info
TG: throw it in the load gaper or whatever if you want i dont really care
TG: give it a swirly and slam it in a locker call it a nerd break its glasses whatever
TG: but beyond this whole lord english thing weve got going on i am pretty content to never aggress my fellow man slash alien slash monster again if i can help it
TG: i think thats pretty fair given what thats been like so far
====================
TG: and yknow its cool to have some company when im waxing emotional over the narrative depth of click starring adam sandler which we are watching next by the way
CG: UGH, FIIIIIIIIINE. JUST TO MAKE UP FOR CALLING YOUR THINKPAN SMOOTH AND SUPERFLUOUS.
====================
TG: score
TG: we should argue all the time
CG: SNRK
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kapitein-oranghien-29 Ā· 2 years ago
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Why is Drone stinky tho? Will he let me take a shower with him if I feed him enough?
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Will claw the doorframe when he knows you're leading him into the bathroom. He will just flop down and use his weight against you.
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