#telling myself i’m being delusional and it’s not a plant that would take so much fiddling.

[iksydk]

i had a conversation with my friend abt being crazy after having a baby earlier and then i talk to this guy and he tells me about how his friend was telling him about his wife who’s bipolar is worse bc she’s pregnant. waow synchronicity.

[poppyseedgirly]

today i shoveled dirt and planted seeds

cleaned up the yard, sat with my silence

and the sun was hot on my skin

and my period came early this month

but i think it makes sense for april

and i’m off my birth control so it’s just

regulating

anyway, gardening on your period makes sense to me

i’m going to care for this little garden

flowers mostly, and experimenting with cat grass and nip

there was a peacefulness

where moments i was thinking about

everything

and i felt okay

doing something on my own

whether it’s right or wrong

but it’s my own, and i think it turned out quite nice

two patches, surrounded by brick and stones

some water, some pats, and some hope

i’ve been thinking a lot about tears

and watering a garden

and that garden being myself

it takes time, change, fleeting moments

i wonder where tears come from?

probably straight from the heart i’d assume

i think about all the things i never felt

i did perfectly for others

i think about the worms in the dirt

and i think about worm hearts and frogs in pots of boiling water

and metaphors and i’m thinking about love

i’m trying not to be confused, but sometimes that’s all i feel,

other days it makes more sense

i thought about how mean you were to me at times,

in all my moments of patience, it makes me scratch my head,

i remember you saying you failed me,

and i didn’t understand and i pleaded to you

are you sure are you sure are you sure

delusional daffodil darling

i will never beg for someones love again

like i’m taking my rose colored glasses off,

like i need to take them off

i went to the eye doctor today

and asked please please please

i do not want rose colored glasses

give me the clearest lenses you got

( which is funny because my glasses are rose colored, i picked a brown pair out, a new era )

you wanted to crack the code so badly, the code of it all, of the universe, and i would always say it’s right in front of you, it’s simple, and it’s not simple, and it’s love

i still believe this to be true, i wonder if that will change, i wonder if one day you will understand

i sit on my twin size bed

and try to pop my sore knee back into place

and think about how at some point

i’m going to lose everyone

and i’m trying to sit with that thought

take it in doses but not too much

because i know when each day comes

i will not be ready, how can you

my grandma called me today

and started asking about depression

reminding me while if others are sad for me

to remember it’s okay if i am sad too

and that i am doing well for my situation

people keep telling me that,

that i’m seeming okay

i wonder what they expect

or maybe they aren’t seeing

what i feel in moments where

i am so scared of myself

she said they used to write books about depression,

and she misses the yellow pages

and they gave her some books when my grandfather died,

she can’t find them as she is blind now and i say that’s okay

she said, it’s like a death allison

one day the person who has been by your side all this time is just gone

and it shot hot tears through me, i said yes

she said talking about depression can be depressing though, so she doesn’t bother with it

and i think that’s really interesting and funny

sometimes her words are so wise and real and cut me so sharp and i want to jot it all down

she said give yourself a hug

i told her ice cream is good for the heart and it made her laugh a lot

she talks about how her own path changed and lead her to my grandfather

i still believe in good things

and better things to come

i believe my garden is just beginning to grow

i believe i’m going to be okay and i’m going to figure it out and be soft and tender

and still have a heart open and warm to love

poppet steps across my laptop

just like before and messes with all the keys

and i let her

some things are the same, most things are different

and that’s okay, i think that’s okay i still say through gritted teeth

i’d be lying if i didn’t miss a lot of things

but again i’m still accepting

rewiring my brain

i think i’m going to walk at the cemetery soon

explore neighborhoods around me

i grew up too sheltered to truly know

why is everything new

i sometimes wonder if people find life as an obligation rather than enjoying all that it has to offer

i worry about getting stuck sometimes but i think to myself i have this thought so maybe i can’t truly get stuck if i’m aware of it

i believe in something good around the corner, i believe in art, poetry, movies, all the words said before each day to come, marlee, poppet, our dreams, the seeds i just planted.

[nakamoto-aesthetics]

Varsity Jacket | j.jh

synopsis: your highschool boyfriend has a reputation of not showing affection in public nor sharing his clothes with other girls so why was he doing those things with you?

pairing: boyfriend!jaehyun x fem!reader

genre: highschool!au, sexual themes with some fluff on the side

warning: lots of touching “we’re touching each other, it’s all about interaction, we gotta be social” ~ mark lee

word count: 1.9k

Part 1 | Part 2

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

once you walk in your see jaehyun standing up and looking towards where you were, he smiles once he sees you and waves you over to his table. you’re about to walk over when you see your friends at a different table. you sighed, you blew off your friends the previous days already and you were beginning to feel bad.

you raise one finger to jaehyun and he nods sitting down. you walk over to your table, they smile at you immediately.

“are you sitting with us today?” mira asked.

“cant. I’m really really sorry” you reply feeling bad.

“it’s fine,” she says smiling softly. “yes it’s okay to be with your boyfriend” seongyeon winks at you. you smile and nod walking away but you couldn’t help but feel upset.

“there you are” jaehyun smiles as he notices you, he stands up. he looked so good at that moment, your boyfriend was incredibly sexy. it drove you crazy, he drove you crazy; especially when he was shirtless. you loved licking his abs. you could feel all the individual packs with your tongue. you even left hickeys on them and that’s why there were always dark red/purple marks on his abs when he changed for basketball practice, this hadn’t gone unnoticed by his teammates either.

“you kept my jacket on” he smiles when your closer to him and you nod at him.

“yeah I did because it’s comfortable and warm” you hug him.

“good” he smiles sweetly. “I’ve been thinking about you since I last saw you” he digs his head into the crook of your neck. you wrap your arms around his waist and kiss the top of his head. jae has always been clingy like this, he hugged and kissed you all the time.

“oh yeah? what were you thinking about?” you asked letting your hand travel down the sides of his torso and you slide your hands up his shirt feeling your way around his body.

“having you in my arms, smelling you, kissing you, and also touching your body” his hands explore your body freely, moving his hands up and down the grooves of your curves.

“how do you want to touch me,” you ask genuinely.

“I wanna explore every inch of your naked body,” he says in your ear making your breath hitch. his hands go down to your ass and he squeezes it tightly, you moan softly as he starts to kneed with his fingers and palms.

“are you guys gonna film a porno in front of us too?” johnny says directing all the guys’ attention to you both.

“I probably would just because I wouldn’t care” jaehyun turns his head to them and you do too. all their eyes meet yours for a reaction and that’s what you give them.

“you wouldn’t care but I would” you twist your face at him.

“well you heard her, we won’t be filming a porno in front of you guys” jaehyun stands up and takes his hands away from you, grabbing your hand and sitting down at the table.

“wow, jaehyun conforming to what a girl wants instead of just thinking about himself. that’s a rare sight” haechan says in a surprised voice. you wondered why that was. why did jaehyun treat you differently than past girls?

“this is not a girl, this is my girl,” he says looking at all of them. you caught that however, you needed to know now. why are you different?

“jae can I talk to you alone?” you whisper in his ear.

“sure princess. hey guys I’ll be right back” he stands up and grabs your hand.

“they’re gonna go fuck” and they all made noises. at least the boys didn’t seem to hate you at this moment. jaehyun chuckled and guided you out of the lunchroom and into what you both called your special place. it was a place up on the roof, it had all kinds of colorful flowers. it didn’t sound as magical as it was but it was a sight to see.

it was where you first came in contact with jaehyun. you knew him but he didn’t know you at the time, the more and more you and him saw each other, the more your crushes developed on each other. you guys were friends until finally, you confessed to him. it went well because here you guys were a year later, together in a relationship.

you both step onto the ground outside and he brings you over to the iconic spot.

“so what do you wanna talk about?” he sits down and pulls you into his lap so you're straddling him.

“I wanted to know why I'm different from other girls” his eyebrows furrow and you decide to explain further. “you’ve never given other girls your jacket but im wearing it and you don’t show affection in public but you showed a lot of PDA today” you wrap your arms around his neck and play with the hairs on the back of his neck.

“it’s because... I could see a future with you,” you raise your eyebrows not expecting him to say something like that. “I mean your wifey material and they weren’t. you’re the longest relationship I’ve ever been in but that’s because I couldn’t see myself marrying them or being with them long term. don’t you see? I can see myself marrying you and having kids, having an actual family with you because that’s how much I love you” he says, the whole time you were biting your lip and looking into his eyes. how did you get so lucky?

you place your hands on either side of his face and immediately pull him in for a kiss as soon as he was done talking. he smiled against your lips and kissed you back, gripping your waist. you move your lips to his cheeks and down his neck.

“you're so fucking beautiful,” you say softly in his ear and kiss under it.

“I should be the one saying that to you” he chuckles and pulls your face back up to his, kissing your cheeks gently.

“no, you’ve loved on me all day. it’s my turn to love on you now” you move down to his neck and nip at it.

“i’ll let it slide for right now princess” he tilts his head so you have more space. you smile against his neck and plant hot open-mouthed kisses on his neck, sucking on his skin a bit until bright red marks formed.

“today I got an argument with a girl and it was about you,” you say against his neck.

“why?” he rubs your back.

“because she thought she could look at me any type of way so I gave it to her straight. she was delusional, she called you her man and everything like who says that shit when you know that guy is taken?” you look up at him through your eyelashes.

“what did I tell you beforehand? don’t get into petty arguments, this is what I didn’t want happening” he says softly and kisses your head.

“yeah but at the end of the day who's receiving all your love? who’s getting kisses and ass grabs? who’s fucking you and making you groan? me that’s who. baby your mine, all… mine” you turn his face to yours and plant small kisses on his lips until he pulls away.

“you can’t just say some shit like that and then kiss me like that. fuck that was so hot. I love it when your possessive” he slips his hands up your shirt and lets his hands roam your skin. “I want you so bad right now” he groans. you knew he was telling the truth because you could feel his hard-on right beneath you.

“nope let’s go I’m not taking care of your problem right now” you stand up and hold your hand out to him. he groans in annoyance and takes your hand.

“your mean” he pouts.

“suck it up buttercup” you lead him back into the school. the walk was fairly quiet, both of you were enjoying the presence of each other.

“hey, baby?” you say before you walk into the cafeteria, making you stop in your tracks.

“yeah, sweetheart?” he stops walking also and looks at you.

“I can see a future with you too, I can see us having our own house with our own little family,” you smile at the thought and then look into his eyes. “that’s what I see when I look into your eyes, jaehyun your eyes are full of life they’re so pretty,” you place your hand on his face and caress his cheek. “your so pretty” you whisper.

he doesn’t say anything and instead looks into your eyes too, you both were intoxicated by the other; neither of you moving a single muscle that was until the bell rung and people started pouring out the room.

jaehyun immediately grabs your hand and pulls you off to the side. he pushed you against the wall and stroked your bottom lip.

“did you mean what you said? every word?” he asks biting his lip softly and his tone lower than usual.

“yes I meant it all. jae I can see our kids running around the house with smiles on their face while me and you are cuddled up next to each other watching them.” you instantly smile. “our kids would cute as hell too” you chuckle.

“for your genes obviously. your drop dead gorgeous from head to toe” he looks you up and down. “and your all mine that’s the crazy part”

you shake your head. “you definitely carry the looks in the relationship and will carry the looks in our kids genes”

“stop that non sense and kiss me” he looks deep into your eyes, his fingers dancing on your waist.

you do as he said and grip his biceps pulling him closer. you move your lips against his at the perfect pace, the kiss was full of passion and love you could feel it. you really loved him no doubt about that, you didn’t care who watched or stared now because he was yours and you were his.

“jaehyun come on we have class” doyoung says, making you both pull away.

“I guess i’ll see you later baby” jaehyun pecks your lips multiple times before you push him away gently.

“jae your gonna be late go” you chuckle and he quickly pecks your lips again before walking away.

you bit your lip as you watched him walk away. damn he was all yours. how in the world did you get so lucky.

“y/n let’s go” seongyeon says, pulling you by your hand and with that you were off to your next class, with jaehyun on your mind.

a/n: that’s the end! i know that was a weird ending but i wasn’t sure how to end it nonetheless i happened you all enjoyed it!!

NCT Masterlist

[tintinwrites]

my hero | Din Djarin x Reader | Part One

A/N: I know I teased about this fic and maybe you guys will like it? Please read the warnings!!

Rating: T

Warning: Character death, but he’s okay promise! This will include Dark!Mando in future chapters. Reader is gender neutral, but will be AFAB in future smut. Reader is Force sensitive but doesn’t know it or know what the Force is despite knowing Grogu because...I don’t know they’re stupid. I’m BSing a lot in this please forgive me I did do some research but had to make up a few things myself. Naughty words. Shady dealings here y’all.

Word count: 2,510, apparently!!

Summary: When Mando is killed by a quarry, you’re willing to do anything to bring him back to you.

GIF credit: ^

Tags: @hoodedbirdie @mitchi-c @bisexual-space-slut @equalstrashflavoredtrash @mishasramblings​ @dindjarinscyarika​ and open!!

                                     ---------------------------------

You were seeing things.

You had to be seeing things.

Mando was skilled and he was tough, so there was no way that this was possible.

You did not spend all that time getting to know him and learning about him and falling in love with him for him to just be gone.

But you could see the wound just under his cuirass from here, could see the way his armor laid there unmoving even though you could distantly hear yourself calling his name again and again.

It was just a fucking quarry who managed to break free of his grip, so how could this fucking happen?

He wasn’t supposed to be killed by a routine he knew so well, by a person who was desperate not to be taken back to whoever paid for them, by the type of beings that he always dealt with easily.

The bounty was dead now too; you were dimly aware that you screamed as soon as you saw your friend, your companion, the man you were too afraid to tell— as soon as you saw Mando fall to the ground when his blaster was yanked off him.

You pulled out your own blaster and shot the other man without a single care, and you just stood there in shock for several moments, and now you were walking towards the two bodies and you kept saying his name and he still didn’t answer.

“Mando.” Your voice shook as you finally came to his side and you moved down to your knees, your hands hovering over him for a moment before you gently shook him. “Mando, come on. I know this...this is a trick…”

He didn’t answer, didn’t move, and your vision was blurry as you looked up at the sound of a coo to find Grogu slowly walking over. His ears were lowered and he looked at the man who’d practically become his father with big, sad eyes.

“No.” You sobbed, looking down at Mando and touching his chest, his helmet, his shoulders, as if he would tell you he was faking it or if he would jump up at your touch. “No.”

But he still remained as he was laying there on the ground.

You started to weep as you fell back slightly, unable to do anything but stare at him for any movement, even the tiniest flinch of his helmet or his gloved fingers.

“This can’t be happening...I need you. What am I supposed to do without you?” You were pleading with him like he could hear you, your voice tearful and trembling the more you realized that Mando was gone. “What about the baby? What are...what are we supposed to do?”

You didn’t know how long you just knelt there begging him not to go, telling him you loved him and apologizing for not telling him before; eventually you just sobbed into your hands until you couldn’t cry anymore and you just looked at his body, both of you empty in different ways.

Looking for comfort and closeness from him now that he was no longer there, wanting to spend just a minute more with him, you laid on the ground and lifted one of his arms so you could pull it around yourself as you pressed up against his side.

All you could do was stare straight ahead with your cheek pressed against his cuirass as the sun set, barely even noticing Grogu cuddling up where your hip met the man’s side.

Even though you’d desperately shaken him and begged him and confessed to him, it remained the same; Mando was...dead.

                                              -------------------------

You managed to pull his body to the ship, leaving him there on the lower level as you took Grogu up to the cockpit.

You just sat there for a few minutes, not knowing what to do or where to go; what were you going to do with Mando? What were you supposed to do from here?

It occurred to you, as you sat there just staring at nothing, that this couldn’t be it for him.

There had to be a way to reverse this or bring him back or something, and you weren’t going to give up on him without trying your damnedest to find out if you could save him.

You knew there was a database on a nearby planet that had all the information they possibly could as told by ancestors or travelers, so you punched in the coordinates and guided the ship with determination.

A shaky determination that told you that you were being delusional, but that it couldn’t stop you from foolishly trying to find a way to bring the man you loved back from the dead.

You put Grogu in his satchel when the ship landed and put it over your shoulder, refusing to look down as you stepped over Mando on your way out. It seemed like everyone on the planet was looking at you, like they knew you were trying to do something impossible and stupid, and you walked to the database building as quickly as you could.

There were datapads connected to all the information and you passed by several different species who were looking up different things; some for whatever academy they went to, some for enjoyment.

You found a free datapad between a man and an Abenedo that you quickly walked over to, thinking for a moment before you quickly searched the database for the word ‘resurrection’.

Most of the information you scrolled through was about different religious beliefs and all the others seemed to be the titles for romance or mystery books. You scrolled faster and faster with a look of desperation, flipping through page after page in search of something about actually resurrecting someone.

“You’re not gonna find what you’re looking for here.” The voice to your right made you jump, looking at the man beside you who was eyeing your screen with amusement.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said quickly, unconvincingly.

“Maybe I’m wrong, but you’re standing there looking up ‘resurrection’ and crying.”

You reached up to touch your cheeks, finding that your fingers came away wet because you’d started crying when you realized there wasn’t anything in the database.

The man looked around to be certain no one was listening and then he crooked his finger as he backed away. “Come with me and I can give you information about someone who can help.”

Maybe it was stupid to trust this strange man promising you valuable information so easily, but you were willing to try anything if it meant a chance at bringing Mando back, so you followed him to a quieter part of the building.

He once again looked to see if anyone was listening and then he grabbed a datapad, typing on it quickly.

“You want to find Ratik Tillie, she lives in the forests of Corellia, she’ll give you the ingredients and the ritual you need to focus the power. You’ll find her,” he spoke as quickly as he could then showed you the coordinates for the location.

“Thank you.” You read over the coordinates a few times before turning to go back to the Razor Crest, only stopping when the man called out.

“Do you know the Force?”

“Uh, yes, obviously.”

You lied because you didn’t know what he was talking about, bolting off to the ship and making your way up to the cockpit, putting in the coordinates as fast as you could and taking off towards Corellia.

Lightspeed allowed you to be there within minutes and you landed right in the forest, not looking down at your feet again as you walked to the ramp and onto the planet.

There was a shack or a hut, you didn’t know the proper term for the little home. You supposed that was where this woman lived and you moved to knock on the door.

“Come in, come in.” The door opened, but there was no one standing there.

“—hello?” You stepped into the house and looked around until your eyes landed on a small, older woman who was tending to a pot of something. “Ratik? I was told I could talk to you about—”

“Resurrection.” She looked at you with a knowing smile.

“You know because I’m crying, right?” Though there weren’t any tears on your cheeks when you touched them this time.

“No, dear, your sadness is obvious. Your spouse?” She hummed when you shook your head, tilting her own. “Your lover.”

“No.” You looked down at the floor.

“Unrequited then?” Her guess made you look up at her again and she smiled, nodding. “But a friend nonetheless. You don’t know what to do without him.”

You didn’t know how she knew so much, but it built your faith that the man was right, that this woman would know how to bring Mando back.

You watched as she moved to a shelf and grabbed a few things, looking to your side when you heard Grogu let out a coo. He was looking up at you questioningly and you figured he just didn’t know what was going on.

Ratik walked over to you with a few glass bottles, some with plants and others with substances you didn’t recognize, and she tucked some into the bag with the baby then handed the rest to you.

She told you where you needed to go and explained that you needed to mix the ingredients in a bowl she put in the bag. “You’re just going to focus all your power on him.”

“Thank you.” You reached up to squeeze her shoulder and moved to grab credits out of the satchel, but she put a hand over yours, staring at you with almost fondness.

“With all that power between the two of you, this will work out just fine. You’re certain this is what you want?” Her eyes were blue, you noticed, as she looked up at you like she knew you.

“I want him back.”

“Then go. Take it for free. You’ll know when you’ve completed the ritual.”

You smiled softly, nodding before you walked out of the house and back to the Razor Crest.

Mando was still there on the floor, but you hoped that would change if you followed this Ratik’s ritual and were able to summon enough ‘power’.

What she meant by you and Grogu having enough power for this to work out fine, you didn’t know.

Maybe she was simply referring to your will to bring Mando back, that you needed to really mean it and want it for something like this to work properly.

Either way, you put in the coordinates for the planet she told you about; it was apparently a source of power in itself just outside of a planet that was focused on this power, and that was where it was best to attempt these rituals.

It looked like any other planet to you. You walked through the grass to a private spot where you thought you might not be interrupted and you set Grogu down before you took out all the ingredients.

You mixed them into the bowl she provided with your hands and then looked over at the kid, nodding slightly. “We just need to think of Mando.”

Closing your eyes, you tried to think only of Mando; of how you loved him, of how much you wanted him with you again so you could tell him.

Thunder rolled overhead and there was a flash of lightning, making the baby coo in fear and quickly crawl into your lap. You let him hold onto one of your hands that was messy with the ingredients, trying again to think of Mando.

You didn’t see the bowl trembling or how the ingredients were slowly disappearing like someone was taking them, but Grogu did and he whimpered, trying to tug on your hand.

You normally would’ve looked at him to see if he was okay, but all you could think about was Mando, your thoughts practically running around in your head and trapping you inside them like a fortress.

There was another clap of thunder right above you, almost deafening, and it seemed to set off a switch in your head that had you crying out, falling forward onto your hands and knees.

You didn’t even notice that Grogu rolled out of your lap as your thoughts turned dark and sinister, like every bit of hate and anger in the galaxy was now yours and yours alone.

It crawled into your chest and made you grip on tightly to the grass, wanting to rip every last bit of the ugly, green plant out of the ground as you trembled with pure rage.

You hated the grass.

You hated this planet.

You hated that man and Ratik.

You even hated Mando.

That thought released the hate and you fell back onto your heels with a gasp as your normal emotions came back, your eyes opening wide at the fact that you could feel that, that you could think that.

You sat there panting for a long moment before your eyes moved down to the now-empty bowl and then went to Grogu. “Did you eat it?”

He was looking at you with fright in his eyes and you realized you probably scared him with how you’d been acting, not caring whether he ate the mixture or not as you took him into your arms.

“I’m sorry, buddy, I don’t know what that was…” You looked up at the sky as the thunder now rolled in the distance. “Maybe that was it? Should we go check on...you know?”

There weren’t further instructions than mixing together the ingredients and focusing on Mando, and she said you would know when the ritual was complete…

It seemed to you like it was.

You grabbed the bowl and put Grogu on your hip as you walked back to the Razor Crest, hesitating slightly before you walked up the ramp.

Mando was still there, unmoving on the floor, and you pressed your back against the wall, tears quickly filling your eyes because it didn’t work. It was all you could do and it didn’t kriffing work.

Did you not finish it correctly? Did you not have this supposed ‘power’ or ‘Force’ that both the man and Ratki mentioned? Was it all just a joke and you were absolutely stupid for thinking you could resurrect him?

It was really just you and Grogu now, wasn’t it?

You let the kid down where he toddled over to Mando and you dropped your head into your hands as you sobbed, sliding down to the floor and bringing your knees up to your chest.

You didn’t know what to do now.

You didn’t know where to go.

The sound of a gasp made you jump slightly and you quickly lifted your head to see that the unmoving body was now sitting up, his helmet turning every which way as he looked around himself, and your eyes widened in disbelief. “—Mando?”

[starsscarmyceiling]

Sooooo, here's another Ben POV I wrote just because I love you guys and I feel like you deserve it waiting so long lol. It's Ben's perspective of finding the cupcakes and then the subsequent blind closing HEHEHEH. It's not really a requirement that you read the new chapter first. I really hope you enjoy!

“Okay, I understand you’ve been under a lot of pressure—right—would you just—okay,” Ben reasoned over the phone with his best paralegal, Daniela. She was trying to convince him that he needed to hire another one as she would very often now tell him that her work load was too great, “well, I don’t know. I trust you, why don’t you look at some resumes?”

He was in the elevator of his building, and it dinged as the older woman—Ben thought her name was Betty or Bertha or something like that—who lived under him got out. Then he was riding up to his floor and pinching the bridge of his nose with his free hand, “Yes, of course I do. You’re the best paralegal I’ve ever had.”

That wasn’t an exaggeration, and since she was helping him build up more clients, he figured he could trust her with finding someone to work with her. Ben didn’t need the extra stress anyway. The breakup between him and Bazine hadn’t been messy per se, more that the entire relationship was. Daniela knew this, too.

“I’m fine. I promise I am not going to work myself out into a coma—oh I think I got all of the junk food binging out of my system already—alright, I will see you tomorrow—” he stated as he rounded the corner of the hallway, and something in front of his door made him pause and blink for a couple of seconds before he answered Daniela, “okay, bye.”

It was just about the most random thing he could conjure in his brain. There, on the ground was...a half dozen cupcakes. He scowled at them as if they were going to give him answers as to where in the world they came from.

“Huh,” he let out. He scratched at his scalp before he bent down to pick them up.

Upon inspection, he found that there was no note; absolutely no indication as to who in the world would have left them.

But half of them were red velvets, which were his favorites.

“Maybe Hux is finally trying to poison me,” Ben said to himself somberly as he unlocked his door. He walked in still expecting the patter of R2’s feet, but alas, he was only met with silence as he was still recovering from the accident at his parent’s house. It made the apartment seem so much emptier.

Ben left the cupcakes out on his kitchen counter, and then he changed out of his suit. When he returned to them, they just stared back at him like six little secrets that he couldn’t solve.

He had so many questions. Why? Why in the hell would anyone just leave him cupcakes without any explanation?

And who? Who left them there? His mother? Daniela? Marisol? Poe? Maybe even Bazine to smooth things over post break up?

He sighed as his eyes flitted up to the place he told himself wasn’t a possibility because it was absolutely ridiculous, but he couldn’t deny the way his heart raced when he thought about it being her.

The sunshine that lived across the street from him. Hot neighbor girl. The woman who loved her plants and her cat, played video games or worked at her desk in the middle of the night, and had such bad eating habits that it almost annoyed him in an endeared sort of matter because all he wanted to do was provide a more formidable meal for her.

For a moment, he imagined her taking time out of her day and walking over to his door, leaving them there for him. It made his heart swell more than he thought was acceptable.

But again, he was brought back to reality where sunshine girls did not waste their time on storm clouds like him.

“You’re being delusional,” he said to himself as he walked past them and sat on his couch. She wasn’t even home, which he was somehow thankful for right now. Him pacing back and forth in front of several mystery baked goods wasn’t exactly something he wanted her to witness.

He decided that he didn’t really want to be here alone right now, so he stood up to go for a run. As he put on his shoes, he had the faintest of smiles as he thought about the next episodes of Parks and Rec that he was going to watch with her tonight.

Ben walked by his counter and eyed the cupcakes, still somehow thinking he would glean any enlightenment from their mere existence.

No, he thought to himself as he still dared not to even touch them again, despite the joint binging they had been enjoying lately from across the street, there was absolutely no way that she had been the one to leave them there.

He opened the door and thought he would call his mother when he got home in order to see if she was the one responsible. Or maybe he would just throw him away because god knows where they even came from.

Yeah, it was truly delusional.

Right?

...

It had taken a day for him to break down as they tormented him, staring them down like the little caloric monsters that they were. He tried ignoring them, working on his depositions, playing on his PS4, boxing until he his arms were about to fall off. None of it worked.

And for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to throw them away.

So he thought, perhaps he could try one. That wouldn’t be so bad. If Hux was really trying to poison him, he would soon find out.

He double checked to see if sunshine was there—again, did not want her to witness his weakness—and when he saw her apartment was empty, he he popped open the plastic covering and gently picked up one of the red velvets.

The fact that they were the most delicious morsels he had ever consumed, which was something he would never admit to his mother, was how he found himself here, in front of the bakery that was on the sticker of the box they came in a week later. He certainly was surprised to see that it was just down the street, only making the whole situation even more curious.

He sighed and opened the door, knowing he wouldn’t be able to resist now that he wound up at a cupcake bakery in the first place.

The baker of the place came out from the back once Ben had been standing there for a few seconds, and even though this was a perfectly normal activity, he still felt as awkward as a teenage Ben trying to ask a girl out.

“What can I help you with big guy?” The man asked. Ben looked to the embroidered name on the man’s baker’s jacket, which read as Dexter.

“Uhh, yeah…I guess I’ll take some cupcakes.”

“Well that’s a good start,” Dexter said jovially, “what can I get cha?”

The process of picking out six cupcakes felt more challenging than taking his bar exams in the moment as his social anxiety took over, which still reared its ugly head in situations like this where he was unfamiliar with his surroundings and the people in them.

Why did he think this was a good idea again?

When Dexter had packaged up Ben’s baked goods, he paid and turned to leave. He was focused on the cupcakes as he approached the exit. Just, now why did he buy these? This was a stupid idea. How did these insignificant clumps of sugar have such a hold over him? It didn’t make any sense. He was just going to have to go home and—

A body slammed into his chest and reverberated so severely off of him that both his cupcakes and what Ben believed to be the woman’s phone fell to the floor.

She exasperated in a British accent, which would have made Ben’s senses flutter, but then he looked down and really got a better look at her. Oh, his heart was going to explode out of his chest, leaving him to deal with the resulting cardiac arrest that would surely kill him because it was her.

And Ben felt like she had to be an illusion because there was no way that it could have been her, picking up the ruined cupcakes, apologizing in the most beautiful voice he had ever heard, and then pausing before she began to stand. Did she recognize him too? Did she know this was exhilarating him more than he had ever been in his life with every slow inch she rose?

It was almost like sweet torture by the time she finally stood to her full height as Ben stared down at her most lovely visage. Complete with the most adorable smattering of freckles across her nose, and wide, wonderous hazel eyes.

God, she was about a billion times more beautiful up close. How was he even supposed to function being in such a presence? Such a angelic creature? Such a—

It finally occurred to Ben that he needed to say something so he wouldn’t look like such a ginormous idiot, which he was sure he already was.

“It’s you.” He stated dumbly.

Well, that was just about the worst thing anyone had ever uttered to another person.

Ben was already mentally berating himself severely when she did the most unthinkable—she—she had shoved the offending cupcakes into his chest, and before Ben could do anything about it, before he could stop her and tell her how much she had meant to him over these past months, she was turning away from him, practically sprinting in the other direction.

He let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. What the hell had just happened? How did he…how did he just let her run away like that? After all this time? He couldn’t even be enough of an actual person to be able to say something of any substance to her?

Ben wasn’t aware of how long he had been standing there, but there were people trying to get inside the bakery while he still stood there like a dumb, flabbergasted statue.

“Hey, you wanna move there buddy? You’re scaring away my customers!” Dexter asked him somewhere in the distance.

Ben swallowed and faced him, still grasping the soiled cupcakes to himself, “I—”

He had nothing to say to explain himself. Nothing that would excuse away his atrocious behavior.

“You often just stand there and scare away nice ladies? Just what in the hell is a matter with you?” Dexter shouted at him.

And again, instead of doing anything practical, Ben also just jostled himself out of there, not staring back as he heard Dexter say something about his stupid mole face not being welcome there anymore.

Frankly, Ben couldn’t blame him.

Ben was pacing back and forth in his apartment like a madman. He still could not believe, or even really accept what just happened. Had he really been that close to her? Had he really seen the beautiful planes of her face in such detail?

And then did he really just stand there like a big dumb idiot and leer at her instead of doing literally anything else? No wonder she ran away from him.

He grunted and felt like ripping his hair out as his hands dug through the unruly mess.

“I am such an idiot!” He yelled to no one. He didn’t even have R2 to complain to.

Why had he just blurted out ‘It’s you’ instead of saying something charming? Something funny? Something that wasn’t the most horrendous two syllables ever?

Oh right, because he was a socially awkward goon that would never have a chance with someone as ethereal as her.

She wasn’t in her apartment and hadn’t been all day since the incident. His heart sank when he thought it was to avoid him. Though, to be fair, he was not sure what they were supposed to do now this had happened. What was he going to do, awkwardly wave at her or shrug? Like whoops, we’ve been staring at each other for a year and then totally flubbed their first actual meeting? It seemed very fitting for them.

Ben continued to pace around, cursing his stupid existence when a realization hit him as hard as hot neighbor girl slamming into his chest.

It was her. It had been her the whole time that left him those cupcakes.

He suddenly felt like he had to sit down, so he collapsed on one of his stools as he gawked wildly out at her apartment, clutching at his heart as it beat wildly against his sternum.

She had done it. It was actually her; it just had to be. Otherwise, why else would she be going that specific bakery that happened to be down the street from their apartments? There were so many thoughts racing through his mind as his stomach flipped at the thought of her being just outside his door.

Why had she done it? And why didn’t she let him know it was her? It didn’t make any sense. It was such a nice gesture, and for it to go unappreciated? Ben had no idea what to think anymore. Would he finally have the stones to go over and see her if she did identify herself? Probably not. It probably would have just made his anxiety worse, like how it was going to be when they would finally have to face each other again.

This all felt like too much and not enough at the same time. Maybe he should just go over there now and explain himself, except for the fact that she still didn’t appear to be home. He wished right now that he at the very least could know her name.

He sighed and stood up, hoping a long shower would ease his nerves.

Ben tried reflecting as much as he could as the water trickled down his body. He mattered enough to her to not only recognize their odd neighborly relationship enough to start binge watching shows together when he was at his lowest, and then she went out of her way to do such a kind and anonymous gesture. All of this had to mean something. He had to have meant more to her than someone who lived across the street from her.

Because what even was all of this anyway? What were they really doing? Whatever this was had been slowly developing for months upon months, and Ben was done trying to deny it. This whole thing with the cupcakes was just further cementing how he felt about all of it.

Ben had developed a lot of different confusing feelings for her, and he still didn’t even know her name. He was guessing that it wasn’t hot neighbor girl or sunshine.

After what felt like a very long time, Ben got out and toweled himself off. When he changed, he maybe thought starting dinner was a good plan. Though, he honestly was nervous to see if she was actually out in her apartment. He sighed and finally bit the bullet, opening his door and walking out.

Then what he saw, he honestly wasn’t prepared for, and he nearly felt his knees give out.

She closed her blinds. All of them. Something he had never seen in her do in the whole year he lived there.

Ben sucked in a breath and held it as he stared into the windows that were no longer open. He felt his heart twisting and his hands were shaky. This felt…wrong, and she clearly did this because of him and what transpired between them earlier. Perhaps she really had been freaked out by him, and was trying to put some distance between them and set boundaries.

This was all so insane! How could this be? When they still hadn’t even had an actual conversation?

All Ben knew is that this sinking feeling was probably not going to go away as long as those blinds were closed.

...

It had been a week, and Ben felt like he was a complete wreck. He was stressed out at work all of the time, taking it out on everyone who didn’t deserve it. His mother called him and he yelled at her for practically no reason when he had gotten home and was still met with those blinds instead of sunshine. He apologized profusely and made up some kind of excuse about a particularly demanding case he was working on.

How could he be panicking over someone he still technically hadn’t met? It seemed ridiculous, and Ben tried convincing himself on several occasions that he didn’t need to see her. She was entitled to her privacy, and if she didn’t want to see him, then that was her prerogative.

But after a few days, the more selfish, insecure part of him spoke out more widely and unwelcomed anxiety overtook him as he started convincing himself that he had been making up this entire situation in his head this whole time. He legitimately lost sleep over it. She never cared about him, how could anyone? Who was he to her, but her creepy ass neighbor that stared at her way too much and shamefully imagined her at his door while he jerked off?

Was this it? Was this the end of their whole exchange? Ben swore that he was going to come home to her one day and she was going to be gone, moved out and he would have no way of ever knowing her. That dark thought was almost too much to bear and he buried it with the rest of the intrusive thoughts that plagued his brain.

Ben sighed, feeling like the most pathetic human being to ever walk this earth when he heard a knock at his door. He had almost forgotten that Poe was coming over to watch the hockey game on tonight. He mentally psyched himself up before he opened the door to Poe’s smiling face, an actual nettlesome sight at the moment because he felt so low.

“Buddy!” He said, raising his arms to hug Ben, brandishing a six pack of beer, “Ready to get this party started?”

Ben chuckled a bit, despite himself, “You know I have a ton of alcohol here, right?”

Poe shook his head and walked inside, “You are like the only person to complain about a guest BYOBing. You probably just want to drink your pretentious imported beer anyway.”

He shrugged and crossed his arms, “Then don’t act surprised when I am my usual grumpy self.”

“Yeah, I never am anymore,” Poe stated, walking over to the fridge to put his beer inside, but taking one to drink and twisted off the top. After a swig, his eyes widened once they landed across the street, “since when does hot neighbor girl close her blinds?”

Ben grew red immediately and leaned on the nearest kitchen counter, looking down at the floor in shame, “Yeah, about that. There was sort of this…incident.”

Poe slammed down his beer on the counter and a shocked expression exploded his features, “Holy shit, did you actually finally talk to her?”

Cringing, Ben kept his gaze downward, “Not…exactly.”

“You better tell me what the fuck happened right fucking now Solo.”

He sighed and really should have figured that this was going to happen as soon as Poe came in and saw those blinds. So, Ben regaled him with the entire painful story, and everything that had led up to that moment.

When he was done, Poe shook his head and finished up his beer and turned to get another one out of the fridge. He opened that one and took a swig before he finally spoke, “You are such an idiot Benjamin.”

Poe could have been referring to a million different aspects of his idiocy, so he didn’t protest, “I know.”

“I mean, this girl, who you have clearly been making mutual googly eyes at each other for the past year actually makes an effort to take the next step, and that’s how you handle it?” Poe asked disbelievingly.

Ben raised his hands in the air, “I was a little bit in shock, okay? It’s not like I was expecting her to literally run into me at a cupcake bakery of all places!”

Poe pinched the bridge of his nose, evidently done with all of this bullshit, “Okay fine, but…why aren’t you over there right now explaining yourself to her?”

“Because I am a coward Poe! Why do you think I haven’t gone over there over this whole year?” Ben shouted, voice going more and more shrill as this conversation went on, and he gestured across the street, “And she clearly doesn’t want to see me!”

His best friend stood there aghast, actually looking offended at Ben’s words, “Would you stop making excuses for once and be honest with yourself?! What’s the real reason why you still wont go over there?”

Ben opened his mouth, ready to protest whatever Poe had to say, but he found whatever reply he was going to have would fall short, and he truly was a pitiful man.

Sighing, Ben walked to one of the stools and sat on it, burying his face in his hands, “I—I’m scared Poe. What if—what if after all this time, she really doesn’t want anything to do with me?”

The look of anger that was once on Poe’s face was replaced with what appeared to be empathy, “Oh, Ben. That just cannot be true. How could you even think that? She—she’s lived this parallel life with you for a year. She started binge watching shows with you when you were depressed. She bought you a half dozen cupcakes for Christ’s sake! Get it through you dumb thick skull: she cares about you.”

“Yeah, anonymously. And then she ran away from me the second she saw me!”

Poe ran a hand over his face and then pointed it at Ben after he grunted, “Would you stop? She was probably just as surprised as you were, and then she was also probably super embarrassed too! Girl’s obviously just as much as an idiot as you are!”

That thought gave Ben pause, and it lurched at his gut like a meal that didn’t sit right with him. If she blamed herself for anything, he was going to feel absolutely terrible about it, “I guess you could be right about that.”

Poe chuckled slightly and turned to the fridge, retrieving one of Ben’s pretentious imported beers, proceeding to open it and slide it in front of Ben, “Of course I am, and you know what? You are never going to know either way unless you go over there.”

Ben grasped at the bottle and held it between his too large hands, “Yeah, I suppose you’re right about that too.”

Poe shrugged a shoulder, “Yeah well, it’s just one street. I am sure you can manage it. I believe in you.”

Smiling, Ben picked up the beer and took a drink out of it, “Thanks. Glad someone does.”

Walking around the counter, Poe clapped a hand on Ben’s shoulder, “Always have and always will…now come on, I want to see all of the hockey players fight each other in their sexy, over aggressive way.”

After Poe left, Ben thought about everything they discussed as he stared out into those blinds. Poe was right; he couldn’t have been making this all up in his head. There was something here; there just had to be, and now he had to make things right.

Because there was something else besides straightening out this whole cupcake debacle. After all the late nights they had shared, after all of the parallel meals, workouts, and video game sessions, after all of the times he had seen her water her plants in the sunshine and laugh with her friends, he realized something. He missed her. And he truly cared about her. Without even words, she had become a staple in his life. A comfort whenever he would look up from his laptop at an obscene hour only to see her there as well, putting the kettle on the stove for another cup of tea.

He should have figured she was British. That thought truly had him smiling, and the notion of actually seeing her, talking with her in her home made him feel warm inside. He wasn’t going to be able to back out from this, and nor did he want to. If she would allow him to, he would ask her name. He would ask her all of the things he had been wanting to for a year, and he was really starting to get excited at the very idea of it. He also wanted to pet her cat. That adorable cat had been taunting him for far too long as well.

When he went to bed, his chest felt lighter than it had in days, and he closed his eyes while he smiled to himself. He had no idea what he was going to say, and he was probably going to make an ass of himself again.

Hopefully she wouldn’t slam the door in his face.

[eastofthemoon]

A Paladin in the Fire Nation

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Rating: PG

Series: Voltron Legendary Defender/Avatar the Last Airbender

Summary: After the fight with Zarkon, Shiro accidentally gets tossed into another reality where humans have the ability to bend the elements. His best shot at returning home is with someone called the Avatar, while he waits he might as well take on the job of being the Firelord’s bodyguard.

-----------------------------------------------------

Zuko was silent as Shiro told them his story. He tried to keep an open mind these days and being close friends with the Avatar had caused Zuko to experience very strange things.

However, Zuko did have limits and Shiro’s tale was pushing them to the extreme.

“So you’re from another universe,” Sokka said slowly. “Where you go into space inside ships in the shape of lions, who are sentient and can become on a giant ship shaped like a person called Voltron, and fight an empire run by beings called Garlic.”

“Galra,” Shiro had corrected as Iroh poured himself another cup of tea, “but yes.”

“And you got here because your lion accidentally sent you here while you were fighting the emperor,” Toph added.

“Correct,” Shiro confirmed.

Toph and Sokka turned their faces to Zuko, likely waiting for his reaction. Zuko took a deep breath. “That is an..interesting tale.”

Shiro raised an eyebrow as Zuko stood and tucked his hands into his robes. “Toph, Sokka, may I speak with you in private for a moment?”

“You can use my bedroom and shut the door,” his uncle offered and by the sound of his tone had been expecting it.

“Thank you, Uncle, we’ll just be a moment,” Zuko said briskly.

Toph and Sokka followed close behind while Zuko was being very careful to not say a word until they were all inside and he shut the door.

“I’ll be the first to say it,” Zuko said as he turned to his friends, “he is insane, right?”

Much to his shock, neither of them instantly agreed. Instead, Toph was silent and Sokka waved a hand back and forth.

“Ehhhh, maybe but my gut is telling me no,” Sokka replied.

“You’re kidding,” Zuko said in disbelief. “Did you hear what he said? There’s no way for it to be true.”

“But that’s the thing,” Sokka said as he paced. “Look, a real criminal would probably try to come up with a reasonable explanation. Why would Shiro tell us that story unless it is the truth?”

“You’re saying it’s so crazy it has to be true?” Zuko asked.

“Exactly,” Sokka said with a nod. “Why even bother with telling us about giant lion ships if he assumed we wouldn’t believe it.”

“I’m with Sokka,” Toph said. “I monitored the guy’s heart during the whole time he talked, he’s not lying.”

“He could be good at lying,” Zuko argued. “You told me Azula is able to pass it.”

Sokka raised an eyebrow. “You honestly believe that Shiro guy is at Azula level of lying?”

Zuko opened and shut his mouth. He hadn’t even known Shiro for a day, but he had seemed confused by the interrogation earlier. It was possible the man was a very good actor, but still…

“It would also explain why his armor is so odd,” Sokka added, “and his arm too. Not even Teo and his dad have designs that advanced.”

“Plus, Iroh is taking him seriously,” Toph added. “That should say something too.”

Sokka touched Zuko’s shoulder. “Be honest, what do you feel in your gut about Shiro?”

Zuko shut his eyes. “My common sense is saying he’s delusional,” he sighed, “but my gut says he’s telling the truth.”

“So we are all in agreement then,” said Toph with a shrug. “Now what?”

“How about we start by telling Shiro we believe him?” Sokka offered.

Zuko nodded as he turned around and led them back. Iroh was pouring another cup of tea while Shiro watched them come back with concern in his eyes.

“We believe you,” Zuko stated and sighed. “Although a large part of me is calling me crazy for doing so.”

“I don’t blame you,” Shiro said with a nervous chuckle. “I would have a hard time in your position.”

“So then spaceman,” Toph said as she sat next to him, “how do you think you can get back home?”

“Yeah, if this Black Lion sent you here by accident can she just take care of it,” Sokka said as he and Zuko took their seats.

“I wish it were that easy,” Shiro said, “but I’m too far away for her to help even though I can still hear her.”

Zuko froze as he tilted his head. “You can..hear her?”

“In my head,” Shiro said as he tapped forehead. “We paladins form a connection with our lions and it allows us to communicate them with our minds.”

“I see,” Zuko said, trying to keep his voice calm while he felt his common sense glaring at him. What have I gotten myself into?

“Right, okay,” said Sokka who also sounded unsure as he crossed his arms. “Only person I can think of to help you is Aang.”

“That is what I was suggesting when you three entered,” Iroh said as he sipped his tea. “Since it sounds like at least some form of the Spirit World is parly how you came to be here.”

“I wouldn’t exactly call the Astral Plane a spirit world,” Shiro replied as he rubbed his neck, “but I can’t deny it isn’t that either.”

It certainly felt like a place where spirits could dwell.

Toph sucked the air between her teeth. “Yeah, well, you’re going to have to wait awhile since Aang is dealing with settling some disputes over in the Earth Kingdom.”

Zuko sighed but nodded. Some of the towns had been former Fire Nation colonies that had been given back, but the previous Lord it had belonged to had died and so his twin sons were currently arguing on who the towns now belonged to.

“He is supposed to come straight here when he’s finished,” Zuko replied firmly, “but it’s hard to tell how long as it takes.”

“I see,” Shiro said with a sigh. “If you can recommend where I can stay I would greatly appreciate it.” His frown tightened. “Also possibly where I can make some money since I have nothing to pay-”

“No need for either since you’ll stay here as our guest,” Iroh said.

Zuko choked slightly as he shot his uncle a look. We barely know him and you want him to stay in the palace?

Iroh slightly glanced at Zuko before sipping his tea. “Given your circumstance, I’m sure our GENEROUS Firelord would be more than happy to accommodate you until we can figure out how to get you home.”

Zuko twitched an eye and wanted to argue, but Sokka grabbed his shoulder and whispered into his ear.

“I get your concern, but it’s probably better if he stays here since I doubt we want a ton of people finding out we got a person from another world just dropped into our laps,” Sokka muttered.

Zuko frowned, but gave a slow nod. A lot of people would dismiss it, but there were a few that would probably try to use it to their advantage and there were a few former FIre Nation nobles he rather kept that information away from.

“Alright,” Zuko said as he tucked his hands into his sleeves, “although we’ll have to think of an explanation as to why I’m suddenly treating the intruder as a guest.”

“Just say it was a prank I pulled that went wrong,” Toph said with a shrug.

Shiro raised an eyebrow. “You expect the guards to believe that a mysterious intruder was all just a prank pulled by you?”

Zuko narrowed his eyes before sighing and massaging his forehead. “After the Badgermole and Groundpecker incident, they would.”

Shiro blinked. “The what?”

Sokka sighed. “Don’t ask, trust me.”

Zuko nodded in agreement.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Once Zuko had announced Shiro was a guest, he and Sokka escorted Shiro to a guest chamber. It wasn’t nearly as big as Iroh’s room, but Shiro was just grateful to not have to return to his cell.

The rest of the day passed by rather quickly. Iroh told Shiro he would get him some more clothes in the meantime, and Zuko had his armour returned to Shiro. He assumed it was a lost cause, but Shiro attempted to see if he could contact the paladins through his helmet. Much to his chagrin, all he heard was static.

It was killing Shiro to not be there with his team. They were probably all worried if he was dead, Keith especially. Shiro hated that he was putting him through this again, but it wasn’t as if he had a choice.

He briefly wondered if the Black Lion could just send a message that he was still alive, but Keith’s connection with the Black Lion wasn’t deep enough for that yet. Which meant, all Shiro could do was wait and hope this Avatar would be able to get him home.

Shiro tried not to dwell on this as he ate dinner. Zuko and Iroh had other duties to attend to, but Sokka and Toph joined him. They were energetic, but they seemed to be good kids. Truth be told, Sokka reminded him a lot of Lance, and he wasn’t sure if the two met if they would get along or butt heads as a result.

Shiro didn’t stay with them long. He was exhausted both from the day, and it hadn’t even been a full 24 hours since his life or death battle with Zarkon. So, Shiro went to bed early.

It hadn’t taken long for him to sleep, and it would have been restful if not for the nightmare.

Shiro was back at the Castle of Lion. He wasn’t sure how, but it was wrong.

The lights were off and everywhere there was nothing except darkness.

And no sign of any of his friends.

Shiro ran through the halls. “KEITH! PIDGE! ALLURA!”

He called out but no one responded.

“HUNK! LANCE! CORAN!” Shiro ran through the endless hall. “ SOMEONE ANSWER ME!”

He reached the control room and barged inside.

Shiro froze.

Allura, Coran, and all of the paladins lay motionless on the ground.

The only one who was standing was Zarkon as he wiped the blood off his sword.

“You took too long to come home, Paladin,” Zarkon scoffed as he slowly approached.

Shiro told his feet to run, but they remained planted. His body wouldn’t move.

“Your friends are dead because of you,” Zarkon continued as he raised his sword. “Now you shall share their fate.”

The sword lowered for his head.

Shiro gasped for air as he sprang up in his bed. Sweat dripped off his forehead as Shiro felt his heart pounding in his chest.

“Just a dream,” he muttered to himself. “Just a dream. They’re alright.”

For now, he thought darkly. But they could get killed tomorrow while you're stuck here all nice and safe.

Shiro grip tight on his bed sheets. Once he felt his heart calm down, he scrubbed his hand over his face.

“No way I’m going back to sleep,” he muttered.

If he was back at the castle, he would do some reading or go to the training room for practice. Shiro sighed as he tossed off the sheets.

I’ll go for a walk, Shiro thought. Maybe I can find a quiet place to do some training exercises.

He threw on some clothes and went out into the hall. Shiro headed towards the gardens. Iroh had said he would be free to go there and it seemed the most likely place where Shiro could be alone. He couldn’t see anyone being there this early.

The sun was just starting to rise as Shiro ventured outside. He didn’t see anyone in the garden, except for the ducks in the pond.

At least Shiro thought they were ducks.

The creatures certainly had heads and bodies of ducks, but upon closer inspection they seemed to have turtle shells on their backs.

“Turtle ducks?” Shiro muttered as he kneeled.

A small turtle duck glanced up curiously at him and quacked.

“You are actually not the weirdest creature I’ve ever seen,” Shiro admitted.

The turtle duck tilted it’s head, and then quacked once more before swimming away.

“I didn’t mean it as an insult,” Shiro said with a grin.

“What are you doing here?”

Shiro jumped slightly, and rose back up as he turned around to see Zuko.

He looked different. Zuko’s hair was loose and not as neatly tied up like earlier, and he seemed to be wearing more casual robes.

“Oh, uh, sorry,” Shiro said as he rubbed his neck. “I couldn’t get back to sleep and was looking for a place to train.” He then gave a frown. “Why are you up so early?”

Zuko’s eyes narrowed. “I am a firebender, and thus the optimal time to train is when the sun rises.”

“QUACK!”

Zuko froze.

Shiro glanced downward.

A small turtle duck quacked again before using its beak to tug on Zuko’s pant leg. It was only then Shiro noticed a small piece of bread in the Firelord’s hand.

Zuko sighed as he kneeled and tore off a piece of the bread.  

“It..is also the best time to feed the turtle ducks,” Zuko muttered while blushing.

Another quack was heard when the turtle duck snatched the bread, gobbled it up and spirited towards the pond.

“I see,” Shiro said as he did his best to repress a smile, but couldn’t resist a small chuckle.

Zuko glared. “You find this funny do you?”

Shiro shook. “No, no, sorry,” he said quickly. “It’s just you look like my friend Keith when I caught him feeding some squirrels.”

He thought back to it. It had been Keith’s birthday, and Shiro had taken him into town to celebrate. They had ended up wandering into a park. Shiro had gone to get them some ice cream, only to discover Keith had been tossing some peanuts towards a squirrel.

Shiro may have quietly taken a photo on his phone before Keith realized he had been caught and blushed bright red.

Zuko frowned in response. “You mean rabbit squirrels?”

Shiro’s chuckles paused as he tilted his head. “Um..no squirrels.”

Zuko raised an eyebrow as the turtle duck finished the rest of the bread. “Your world must be very weird.”

Shiro held up his hands. “Look, I didn’t mean to invade your privacy. I’ll just leave.”

Zuko tossed the rest of the bread to a nearby duck and dusted the crumbs off his hands.

“It’s fine,” Zuko said as he stood. “I was about to leave anyway. There’s paperwork I wanted to get taken care of. You can use the garden if you like.”

“Um, thank you,” Shiro said, “and not just for the garden, but for also letting me stay here.”

“I’m not the one you should be thanking,” Zuko said as he crossed his arms. “That should go towards Uncle, Sokka and Toph for convincing me.”

“But it was still your decision in the end,” Shiro replied. “I realize it can’t be easy letting a stranger into your home.”

“It’s not,” Zuko said as he crossed his arms. “Frankly, I’m still suspicious of you.”

Shiro suddenly thought of Keith, who he knew would have had the same response as Zuko.

“Why are you smiling?” Zuko asked.

“Sorry,” Shiro replied. “You just remind me a lot of my friend Keith. He would have agreed with you.”

He couldn’t resist wondering if the two would get along.

“Then your friend is smart,” Zuko said as he turned his back to Shiro. “I’ll send a servant to fetch you when it’s time for breakfast.”

“You don’t have to-” Shiro began, but paused.

There was a metallic glint shone in the bushes. Why would there be-

Adrenaline and panic struck as Shiro dashed forward. “GET DOWN!”

He shoved Zuko to the ground and remained on top of him as an arrow flew over their heads.

“You okay?” Shiro asked as he and Zuko scrambled back to their feet.

“Ask our attackers that,” Zuko snapped and launched a ball of flame at the bushes.

There was a yelp and two men with scorched clothing tumbled out, one of them holding a bow.

“I don’t know who you are,” Zuko declared, “but surrender now and I promise you’ll be treated fairly.”

The archer snarled and prepared to launch another arrow.

“Oh no you don’t,” Zuko said as he charged and with fire burning in both his fists. The archer dropped the bow and pulled out a sword.

Shiro could only assume Zuko could handle it as the other attacker decided to rush at Shiro with a dagger.  He dodged, grabbed the dagger with his cybernetic arm and twisted it out of the man’s hand before kicking him away.

The man stumbled, but quickly regained his balance. He glared at Shiro, and then stomped his foot to the ground. Instantly, spikes popped from the ground and headed straight towards him.

Shiro jumped and rolled on the ground just barely avoiding the spikes. He panted as he leaned on his knees.

“Wild guess, but I take it you’re an earth bender?” he shouted.

“Oh gee, aren’t you smart,” the man sneered as he raised his arm.

A small spike rose out of the dirt, only for it to harden as the man reached for it and snapped it off the ground.

The earth bender charged again.

Shiro sprang to his feet in time to block and flip the man, but not before he felt the spike cut at his normal arm.

He hissed as blood dripped slightly.

Really wish I had my armor on right now, Shiro grumbled.

Flashes came from fighting hand to hand. Having to ignore every cut, every broken bone and keep fighting.

No, no, not now, Shiro thought as he shook his head at the memories. It wasn’t the time.

Shiro looked up. The man had crashed against a tree, but was already getting back up. A battle cry caused Shiro to look over to Zuko. The young Firelord was holding his own, but the archer wasn’t slowing down with each swipe of the sword.

“Do the world a favor and die with your father!” the archer snapped as he tried to slice at Zuko’s head, but missed as the boy ducked.

Shiro heard movement and managed to block the earth bender by gripping his wrists stopping the spike just inches away towards his face.

Shiro grunted and realized Zuko was closer to him now as an idea came.

“Zuko,” Shiro called out, “I think these two should face each other instead!”

Zuko abruptly turned, frowned and gave a nod signaling he got the meaning. Swiftly, Zuko yanked the archer’s arm, and tossed him over just as Shiro did the same with the earth bender.

It was satisfying watching the pair collide into each other and fall into the pond.

Shiro dashed to Zuko’s side. “You alright?”

Zuko brushed the hair from his eyes and gestured to Shiro’s arm. “I should be asking you that.”

Shiro glanced at his arm and gripped the wound. “I’ve had worse.”

Zuko looked ready to say something, until the attackers climbed out of the pond. Both of them were dripping wet and eyes full of fury.

Shiro and Zuko got into fighting position, but suddenly mounds of earth sprang up and trapped the attackers with only their heads poking out.

Shiro blinked, but saw Zuko glanced over and spotted Toph who was now retracting her hand.

“You guys got into a fight and didn’t invite me?” she shouted.

“It was hardly planned,” Zuko snapped.

“Whatever,” Toph muttered as she walked over to them. “Everyone okay?”

“Shiro’s injured,” Zuko replied and sighed, “and he also saved me from getting an arrow through my head.” He slowly looked up and rubbed his neck. “Thanks for that.”

“Welcome,” Shiro said as he gripped his arm, “and it’s not that bad.”

“I think a doctor will be a better judge of that,” Toph replied as she crossed her arms.

Shiro opened his mouth but was cut off by a yawn.

“Okay,” Sokka muttered as he stumbled out, “why was there such a ruckus-”

He spotted the trapped angry men, blinked and then looked to the group. “What did I miss?”

“Nothing good,” Zuko muttered grimly.

Shiro nodded. He might not be in a war, but he had landed right in the middle of a lot of trouble.

[memoirsofamessybitch]

In My Mind Part 7

Joe x Fem Reader

Warning; Strong Language/Fluff

The gap between 6 & 7 wasn’t as big as 5 & 6 and THAT is an achievment we can all get behind!

Enjoy!

Prologue  Part One  Part Two  Part Three  Part Four  Part Five  Part Six

“I'm not an easy person to be around, In fact I sometimes don't even like being around me” after a long silence I finally spoke. I didn’t want to give him any kind of delusion or illusion. The truth.

“I just don't see that Y/N....not in the slightest. You've been the highlight of my days on set, I know I may seem like 100% all the time but I struggle. Big time. God I just wanna...” He looked at me longingly. I bit my lip and sighed with my whole body. 

“Do you like insert favourite food?” I wanted to avoid any more speeches that would lead to touching. Mostly because I was naked under my robe and...I didn't want to start something that;

one: I wouldn't be able to stop myself from finishing and

two: I think would ruin this if rushed into too fast.

“I fucking love it” Of course he did, this man was perfect! 

I sniffed once more and dabbed my nose with the sleeve of my robe and noticed that he was fidgeting a little, then he spoke. “Are we doing like first date questions because I was totally going to actually take...”

“This is the first date stupid....make yourself at home, I'll order in and make myself less... naked” I touched his shoulder, signalling him to step aside so I could go get changed. As I brushed past him, his hand tickled my own and I felt my stomach knot up. I kept walking and changed into the cutest “comfy” clothes I had. When I returned I noticed Joe flicking through my portfolio. I always kept it on the coffee table. It's a great conversation starter.

“You worked on Star Wars?” I nodded and exhaled remembering the most stressful 3 months of my life. I slumped down next to him and pointed to generic alien I spent hours getting into makeup.

“Yeah I wasn't called back for The Last Jedi, but this paid off a lot for me, this got me some of my best gigs...and worst” I looked off, my brain almost forgetting Joe was sitting next to me.

“Okay scale of one to ten....how much do you hate this film we're working on” Joe smirked nudging me with my portfolio. I rolled my eyes and shook my head.

“I ain't saying shit, I know you're friends with the director...” I giggled like a child and covered my face. “Let's not talk about work....that's more like second date vibes. This is the part when you ask me about my childhood, what I like, what I don't like....you know date stuff”

“You really wanna do the generic first date questions...okay...lets do this” I kicked my feet up on the couch and got myself comfortable as we engaged in deep conversation. He told me about his family, his love for films. How many bones he has broken, his first kiss with “Sam Neil” which after him showing me a YouTube clip from Jurassic Park to refresh my memory caused a roar of laughter.

I brushed over my past very hazily. I focused mostly on my post College years. Rather than before. I thought Joe struggled to read the room, especially when it came to me, but he could tell I wasn't overly comfortable talking about anything earlier than that. And that just made me adore him even more.

I showed him photos of me and my friends, asked him about his. We played never have I never while eating dinner by my half melted candelabra I fished out from my broom closet. For ambiance of course. We drank only a little wine. I wanted to keep this as PG as possible. And of course Joe respected that. He even helped me clean up and heat up some hot water for some late night cups of tea.

“I can't believe you've NEVER yelled at a crew member, I do it on the daily” I leaned across the back of my couch and watched him busy around my kitchen area.

“I know you do, but I believe I certainly wouldn't have a job without the efforts of a crew. We are all as important as one another, even the interns you cuss out constantly” I covered my face in slight embarrassment.

“Ugh why are you so pure and wise, quit making me feel bad...how dare you” he chuckled and stirred our tea's one at a time. The slight clinking of my china cups drowning out my shame.

“When you've been in the business as long as I have, and worked with some of the people I have....you grow to have nothing but respect for an entire film crew. I know you respect them, just might not like them” I threw myself back on the couch and groaned.

“STOP” I looked up at my ceiling as I listened for Joe's footsteps back into the living area. He stood above me with the tea and shook his head.

“Never” he replied to me in the most over the top villain voice he could muster. He put the cups down, so I sat up and let him back into his seat. I went to sit back in my original position but he took me by the shoulders gently and eased me down so my head and shoulders were resting on his lap. I looked up at him with a genuine look of wonder in my eyes. Okay, surely i was asleep in the tub...this couldn’t be happening...so I opened my fat mouth.

“Serious question”

“Oh god” Joe replied with a slight chortle to it.

“Once the film is over....” My brain immediately went back to how it was thinking before. Joe's hand covered my mouth softly. I knew what was coming next.

“I understand you're still feeling a little nervous about this....trust me Y/N. I'm sticking around” His hand moved and revealed my smile of relief. Then his hand moved to play with my hair. Next thing I was snoring gently in his lap. 

                                                      *******

My eyes strained from the morning sun coming through my living room windows. My neck was stiff as was my back. I was on my couch with an arm lying heavy across my body. I felt someone breathing on the back of my neck. I grew even more ridged as I remembered last night.

Jesus, Joe and I must have fell asleep on the couch together. My very uncomfortable couch. I tried to sit up but Joe groaned half asleep still and held me tighter.

“Joe...Jooooe” I whispered gently shaking his arm. His hand gripped my waist tightly as I continued to call him and shake him.

“What” He groaned. Perhaps he was much more comfortable than I was. 

“Um...morning” I said in the sweetest voice I could get from my croaky throat first thing in the AM. I wiggled around awkwardly to face him as his eyes were slightly open.

“Hey” he whispered sleepily with a cute little smirk on his lips.

“Didn't have this in mind last night did you at all?” He shook his head in response and began to rub my back. His eyes opened more as his hand trailed down lower and lower. I didn't stop him, I maybe should have but the mornings always had me feeling a certain way. His hand stopped at my ass and squeezed gently. I smirked and lent in to kiss him. He didn't pull away so I guess he was game, even if it was just some early morning groping. 

My free hand rested on his waist as our kiss became a little more repetitive and a little more intense. Eventually I found myself on my back and Joe leaning above me resting his head on his right hand and his left hand running across my collar bone and down my chest. He looked at me with sleepy wanting eyes. I looked back at him with a similar look. The left hand kept travelling to the waist band of my sweats and then under them.

“Just tell me if you're not....”

“ssshh” I put my finger against his lips. As Joe's hand slipped deeper into my sweatpants, my heart was beating loud enough to hear above and below us. 

However a sudden series of vibrations coming from Joe's crotch caused us both to jump in surprise. He instantly took his hand from the inside of my sweat pants and rummaged around his own pants pocket for his cell. I rolled my eyes and then rolled off the couch carefully onto the floor.  

“Uh what time are we due on set” Joe asked shakily.

“7 am” I groaned back at him rubbing my eyes.

“Well its 9am and I have 12...now 13 missed calls from the stage manager”

“Fucking FUCK” I scrambled to my feet and rushed into my bedroom to change.

“You wanna ride in with me” Joe shouted through my closed bedroom door. I stopped hurriedly putting on my jeans to contemplate the offer for a moment. Would save me an ear ache if I went in with Joe....but then....I wasn't keen on everyone knowing about Joe and I. And gossip on the lot spreads faster than the flu.

“Um...maybe not...” I opened the door and looked at him disconcerted. He nodded.

“I totally get it, I don't wanna like put any pressure on you....”

“I just don't want anything to ruin this....I like....us” I groaned once more and rubbed my lower back. Note to self, get a new couch.

“I like us too kiddo. Okay but let me take you out tonight...I owe you for last night” The loving beam that came from him made what awaited me at work worth it. I got a good look at him in that moment. His hair full and fluffy mess. His half smile was enough to give me butterflies for the rest of the week let alone the day. His t-shirt half tucked in his pants. I could get used to seeing him in the mornings like this.

“What for shitty take-out and a lumpy couch” I snickered, I really knew how to show people a good time.

“And?? I loved every second of it” He winked at me. I very visibly blushed. Joe met me at my bedroom door way and planted a very gentle but warm kiss on my cheek.

“I'll see you on set”

“Okay” I exhaled through my words and watched him walk out. I stood a little dumbfounded for a moment. Unable to continue getting ready. Am I dreaming...or am I delusional. Everything felt a little too perfect. I heard my phone go off in my jacket pocket, it hung behind my bedroom door. I rummaged for it and answered straight away knowing what befell me as soon as I did.

“WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU....YOU ALREADY ON THIN FUCKING ICE” I didn't even care. I couldn't stop smiling.

Please let this work...please let him be different....please let this be something

[sassycassie-s-writing]

Playful Friends

By: SassyShoulderAngel319

Fandom/Character(s): DC, BatFam - Jason Todd/Red Hood

Rating: PG-11/T-

Original Idea: I have a lot of time to think during my job right now so... yeah.

Notes: (Masterlist)(By Character)(About Me) Been a while since I really wrote and this felt so good!

@welovegroot @jason-redhood @bat-shots @jason-todd-squad

^^^^^

“Jason!” I exclaimed as my friend opened his apartment door to accept me into a big bear hug. I laughed as he squeezed me. “What is up, my dude? I missed you!”

He chuckled, a deep, resonant sound rumbling low in his chest where it pressed against mine, and patted me head. “Not much. Work’s been murder lately,” he said. “But, yeah, I missed you too. It’s been a couple weeks since we could chill. Are you thinking Mario Kart? Because I’m thinking Mario Kart.”

I laughed and let go of the hug. “Oh, you wanna get creamed?” I teased.

“I was thinking more of a rematch for last time,” he replied playfully.

I patted the side of his face. “You’re just mad that I’m better than you at Rainbow Road.”

“No! I’m not!” He paused for a second. “Seriously though, how do you never fall off?”

Winking, I edged around him to slip into his apartment to get out of the cold. “Practice,” I said.

Jason laughed, shut his front door and spun around. He came over to me—I assumed for another hug—but he surprised me by scooping me up, laughing the whole time. I shrieked, scared, before he carried me to his couch and dropped me on it. “There. Now the night can really get started.”

I rolled my eyes. “Don’t scare me like that ever again,” I snapped. But the actual anger in my tone was diminished somewhat by my laughing. Jason smirked and flopped onto the couch next to me.

“So, shortstop, what brings you to me tonight?”

I whacked him in the arm. “Stop calling me that! We can’t all be as tall and muscular as you!”

Jason just laughed. “Okay okay. I’ll keep the short jokes to a minimum.”

“Sure you will,” I muttered sarcastically, not believing him for a second.

“I will!”

I scoffed. “Shut up. Let’s just make a homemade pizza and let me whip your butt at Mario Kart.”

Jason laughed again. I loved his laugh. He sounded so genuine.

Actually… that was one of my favorite things about Jason in general. He was just genuine. I knew a lot of fake people—ones who put on masks to hide who they really were. Who detached themselves from other people for one reason or another. But not Jason. Jason was real. He felt his emotions and owned them. At least… he did with me. I’d never really seen him around too many other people. Not even his family. Our friend Roy occasionally crashed our game nights but usually hanging out with Jason was a one-on-one thing. He claimed he liked it better that way.

Which I could understand. It was easier not to have to perform emotions for people. And Jason and I had established that we could be real with each other a long time ago. Any space with just the two of us in it was a no-judgment zone. I’d cried in his arms more times than I had in the presence of any past boyfriend. Because Jason and I got each other.

“Alright. Let’s get started on the food and we can play while it bakes.”

Which is exactly what we did. Between the two of us, Jason was the better cook. I mostly sat on the counter and watched. But he let me put the cheese on so I could pick how much. He filled half of it with his toppings and left the other half plain for me. Then it was in the oven and we were on the couch, probably disturbing the neighbors by shouting at each other about how dare you and don’t you dare red-shell me!

Oops.

Jason dropped his controller on the ground. “How do you beat me at Rainbow Road every. D*&%. Time?!” He ran his fingers through his hair and I caught sight of the white streak that hid under his bangs. He’d never told me how he got it and I never asked, but the curiosity was eating me up inside and had been for years. It just never seemed like the right time to bring it up.

I patted his knee. “Because God or the universe or something decided that I could be better than you at one thing. One single, solitary morsel of existence. And that morsel is Rainbow Road in Mario Kart,” I said.

Jason rolled his eyes. “You are better than me in so many ways. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh sure,” I said.

Jason got up as the oven timer went off. “You are,” he insisted.

“Apart from the fact that I can’t cook to save my life, and my sense of style is far less refined than yours. I snooze my way through classic literature yet I claim to love reading. You are a classy dude—even if you try to hide it under a frat-bro façade. You’re a fantastic cook, really well-read and academic. You dress like the most elegant businessman possible when you want to make an impression. And let me tell you: you make an impression. And then there’s me. I look like a vampire who just emerged from her coffin after a three-hundred-year nap half the time. So yeah. Rainbow Road in Mario Kart is basically the only thing that I’m at better than you,” I said.

Jason had pulled out the homemade pizza in the time it took me to spew all that at him.

“Thanks for the confidence,” he said. “But you’re wrong. Your life is so much more put-together than mine. I am a trash fire about ninety-percent of the time.”

“Then I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree,” I said as Jason slid the pizza off the baking tray and onto a big serving plate and started to slice it up—being careful to keep the toppings separate from the plain side.

“S’pose so,” he agreed.

We dished up the slices we wanted and sat next to each other at his breakfast bar.

A few moments of comfortable silence stretched on between us. We’d always had that easy-going relationship where we understood that we didn’t need to fill every moment with conversation. Hanging out with Jason was basically me-time and I was pretty sure he felt the same way about me.

After a minute, a thought struck me. “Jay, I think you’re working too hard. We should take a trip. Go to… I don’t know. Miami? Orlando? We should just fly to a beach or Disney World for a couple days and get away from everything.”

“Beach is more relaxing, Disney World is more escapist,” Jason mused. “But I can’t just leave Gotham yet.”

“How come?”

“Too busy. I really have to get this project done. But it’s easier when you come over and hang out for a while,” he said.

“Oh yeah?” I teased, raising an eyebrow.

“Hey, if you’re going to tease me about a genuine moment, I could just… not invite you over. I can handle myself just fine on my own, thank you very much,” he said. He took a bite of his pizza to punctuate his point. “I don’t need some girl coming around and poking holes in my pride the way you do.” He had a playful tone to his voice, so I egged him on.

“Then why do you?” I asked. “Hmm? Why do you invite over some girl to poke holes in your pride?”

“Maybe it’s because I think you need some entertainment. Thought you might be getting bored.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah. Yeah it’s all for you.”

I scoffed. “You are so full of it, Jason Todd!”

“Oh yeah.” He laughed. Then his face sobered up. “But, for real, I wanted you to come over because… there is something I’d like to talk to you about tonight. But not now. When pizza and ice cream are over with.”

I laughed. “Okay. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah it’s fine. It’s just something I’ve been thinking about.”

“Okay.”

We finished our pizza and after waiting a few minutes—playing another couple rounds of Mario Kart that I beat him at—we had digested enough to have a quick dessert. We each had a bowlful of ice cream, laughing and joking around. Jason stuck his spoon on his nose  and then tried to lick the ice cream off his nose when the spoon fell.

I sighed and set my bowl on his coffee table, leaning back on the couch. “Oh man. I missed this. How come it’s been like three weeks since I saw you last, man?”

Jason also sighed. “Been busy and… I’ve been kinda trapped in my own head,” he said, setting his bowl on top of mine on the coffee table.

“How come?”

“Op—you’ve got a little bit of…” He reached out and wiped the corner of my mouth with his thumb. “Ice cream,” he finished.

I snickered and wiped at my own mouth. “Thanks. So what’s up? Why have you been stuck in your head?”

Jason took a deep breath and sighed. “Remember the last time we saw each other? We got in that argument?”

“I recall,” I said.

“Don’t bristle. I know you still think you’re right and you probably are. But that’s not what this is about. I’m not trying to restart that argument. I wanted to… explain something else,” he said. I cocked an eyebrow.

“What?” I asked.

“Look. When you and I first met, all those years ago, I knew there was something powerful in your soul. Your fiery spirit. Your emotional and mental strength. It was stunning. And I was very intrigued on how you would use it. Then a few weeks ago when we got in that argument…” He sighed again. “I don’t know. I saw it again. That passion—that drive. And… it was beautiful.

“And… you know, I know Roy likes to joke that I’m a big brother to you. But… is that all I am? Is that all I am… to you?”

Jason reached out and touched my wrist with his fingertips. My mouth was slack but I hadn’t let my jaw drop yet. Was he really saying this?

He wasn’t done yet though. “Is this just me? I’ve seen the way you look at me and maybe I’m delusional but it doesn’t look like a platonic gaze. I could keep acting like I’m cool with this weird limbo between friends and something more—but I’m not. I just… I need you. I’m dying for you.” He took another fortifying breath. “Now, I’m not expecting any sort of immediate answer. Take your time figuring it—umph!”

His sentence was cut short by me leaning forward and planting my mouth on his.

Jason’s whole body relaxed. His shoulders curled forward and his hands slid over my waist. He let out a small, low sound—a cross between a coo of contentment and a moan of relief. I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck.

He withdrew from the kiss just enough to whisper against my lips, “So… is that a…”

“Shut up, Todd,” I teased. “I’ve been waiting for this. I just didn’t want to scare you off.”

Jason laughed. “Sure,” he replied playfully.

I kissed him again, and he reciprocated hungrily.

“I’ve been waiting years to call you mine,” he whispered.

[sebbybooks]

Beautiful Sinners (PT4)

Sebastian Stan x Fanfiction

"I don't care how complicated this gets

I still want you."

Ella's

P.O.V

I could close my eyes and still see the fiasco that took place less than six hours ago. Sleep would not come despite how badly I wanted to erase the thought of yesterday. I tossed and turned in my bed feeling my body grow more and more restless. Looking up with only the ceiling to stare at. My memories unfortunately projected onto it for only my eyes to see. To offer me a painful reminder that no matter hard I try I can't escape the people from my past. For nearly ten years my new life has been somewhat tolerable until that one phone call from my mother and it wasn’t even my number that she dialed.

Whatever my best friend Matt talked about on the phone with her managed to sour his mood even more. I could only guess what the topic of conversation was about, Sky Porter. She was a fire starter and I don't mean that just metaphorically. I didn’t even want to find out what my little sister had done this time. It was always going to be a next time and in truth I was still very much still angry over what she let me take the blame for. I've felt like a runaway ever since because of Skylar's lie. I hid in my room till Matt was sound asleep. I knew he was waiting up so we could talk about it. I wasn’t in the mood and frankly my head was elsewhere. Of all the things I had to worry about my mind only wanted to focus on one person. Sebastian should have been the furthest thing from my thoughts right now.

To which in my case was a blessing and a curse. From the time that I’ve known him he tried to help me forget about my not worthy ex boyfriend Nate. He helped my regain my confidence to even stay here. Sebastian undoubtedly made me feel things I’m even not suppose to feel. And now he’s making me sound like terribly written poetry. The tiny little seed was already planted, and I was trying really fucking hard to not let these feelings for him grow. I couldn’t let them because that would only make me like her. Mary Blackwood an I are polar opposites and that’s exactly how I want it to stay. Even saying her name in my head put a horrible taste in my mouth. Plus the immense amount of sugar I’ve been consuming would also do the trick. I was laying in a bed of chocolate wrappers and sweets that wasn't to be eaten for another two weeks. I was getting ready to put a reminder in my phone to replace Greta's stash when my phone buzzed loudly on my nightstand causing my heart to thump rapidly in my chest. I rolled over on my side following the only illuminated light in my pitch black room.Sebastian’s name flashed across my lock screen. Even in the dark I’m pretty sure someone could see the slow grin that appeared on my face.

3:13 a.m Sebastian: Did you know honey bees communicate through a series of dances?

3:13 a.m Sebastian: Wikipedia says it’s called the waggle dance

3:15 a.m Ella: how fascinating...

3:16 a.m Sebastian: It's a useless fact but hey you never know when someone will ask you that

3:17 a.m Ella: Exactly its always good to bee prepared

3:19 a.m Sebastian: I see what you did there

3:20 a.m Sebastian: Did I wake you?

3:22 a.m Ella: no. Why are you still up?

3:22 a.m Sebastian: couldn't sleep

3:26 a.m Ella: maybe something is in the air

3:31 a.m Sebastian: maybe

3:31 a.m Sebastian: Ella?

3:32 a.m Ella: yeah?

3:33 a.m Sebastian: seeing you again tonight. . . . I could've sworn you came from a dream.. I just thought you should know that

I turned my phone on its face clutching it tightly to my chest. What the hell was he doing? I read his message six times before I settled on it being a hint of causal flirting. Then I quickly realized I was being delusional, because the last time someone flirted with me a few years later he cheated on me. If it was then I on the other hand could not reciprocate. My ego however was doing somersaults over the simple fact that Sebastian liked the dress.

3:36 a.m Sebastian: it's ok you can admit I looked pretty sexy I won't hold it against you

3:36 a.m Ella: .....

3:37 a.m Sebastian: what the hell does that mean

3:38 a.m Ella: it means we can't say things like that to each other

3:38 a.m Sebastian: Friends can't compliment each other?

3:39 a.m Ella: is that all you were doing?

3:39 a.m Sebastian: ......

3:41 a.m Ella: You can’t say stuff like that to me Sebastian.

3:43 a.m Sebastian: don’t be mad at me Ella. You are the last person that I want mad at me right now

3:44 a.m Ella: I’m not mad....just don’t ruin the dynamic between us. It’s good and I like you!

3:45 a.m Sebastian: you like me??

3:45 a.m Ella: AS A FRIEND! I like you as a FRIEND!

3:46 a.m Ella: gosh You really know how to get under my skin

3:47 a.m Sebastian: Believe me it’s the other way around

3:48 a.m Ella: Are you saying I annoy you?

3:49 a.m Sebastian: the difference between you and I is that I want you underneath.

3:49 a.m Ella: Goodnight Sebastian!!!

3:50 a.m Sebastian: I kinda need your help with something first

3:50 a.m Ella: What is it?

3:51 a.m Sebastian: Your doorman is probably ten seconds away from calling the cops on me cause I’m pretty sure he thinks I’m drunk off my ass and scoping out the place

3:52 a.m Ella: Where the hell are you??

3:53 a.m Sebastian: I’m outside of your apartment

I jolted upward from my position in my bed. The feeling in my chest tightened as if I was startled by a ghost. He can not be here. What on earth was I suppose to do? I asked to no one. I turned my body so that my feet could touch the cold wooden floorboard contemplating my next move. In an alternate reality I would rush through that door to see if he was really out there. I would let myself feel the butterflies rushing around in my stomach, reminding me that it was okay to be excited and happy. What happened in my grandparents barn house ten years ago would've just been a bad nightmare that I dreamt and Nate would be a stranger I'd happily know nothing about. Sebastian could be someone that I was allowed to have. The further I thought about the what ifs the more I realized I was living in the present. My actual reality consisted solely of regret, but with Sebastian maybe it could be different?

This tortuous mind fuck was not at all fair to me. Sebastian if he knew it or not was putting me in a difficult situation. The second I left my room I'd be stooping to Mary and Nate's level. I was confused ,frustrated and seconds away from eating Greta's stash of Halloween candy for the trick or treaters. I let out a loud sigh that sounded like a groan more than anything. As I stood up searching for some shoes to put on, I tossed my phone onto my bed. I heard the notification chime again, thinking it was Sebastian needing me I left out of my room. When I closed the door to the apartment I told myself at this point what else was there that I could possibly lose?

Spoiler alert. Everything.

3:56 a.m Nate: Look I know you won’t see this until you’re getting ready for work, but do you think we can meet for coffee? I think we need to talk

Sebastian

P.O.V

I am desperate.

I felt so lost and yet there I was sitting on her doorsteps. I just couldn't seem to let the night end. I reached down for the bottled of liquor beside me on the step that I had swiped off of the counter as I was ushered out by Ella's roommate Matt. That creepy prick couldn't wipe that shit eating grin off of his face at the sight of me leaving. I needed to tell Ella about what I had saw earlier. Hell there was a list of things that I wanted Ella to know, but what would she think of me if she found out the shit I had been hiding. She would want nothing to do with me. I didn't want to even think about that because despite only knowing her for a short amount of time I just couldn't give her up yet. I wanted more time with Ella. Taking a heavy swig of the cheap tasting booze, I downed it like it was best damn wine I'd ever tasted it. I didn't think twice about taking it. I just wanted something to help me feel everything then nothing at all. Fuck. Even in my head I don't make sense.

I looked at my phone again to see if I had a new text from Ella. The way it was looking she clearly left me on read. I don't blame her for it I just told her I wanted her under me, then proceeded to tell her I'm outside her apartment. Lately I have turned into such a mess and I can't seem to get my life back on track. Especially when I'm not even the one calling the shots. Being blackmailed by Mary's father will do that to a guy.

"Sir for the last time you need to leave the premises or I will have to involve the authorities." Taking two steps at a time I walked closer to the glass entrance where a man dressed head to toe in a ugly gray and red uniform with a hat to match guarded the front of the building.

"Like I told you several times before my friend Ella lives here. She will be down any minute." I said, buying myself more time.The air was beginning to grow frostier and my breath was coming out in a thick fog.

"There is no one here by that name son. This is a private property so why don't you take your entitlement and intoxication back to East Village." Passing his judgement he doesn't look up from his phone, evidently grown tired of me already and ready to call the cops. I retreated from my stance finally accepting that Ella wasn’t going to show. Maybe it was better that way. I needed to leave her out of my drama anyway.

“Sebastian!” When I heard heard my name coming from her mouth my heart actually stopped beating for a second. I was already on the sidewalk when I turned back around to see Ella standing by the doorman in nothing but her pajamas and a frantic expression on her face. My eyes followed the curve of her face memorizing it just like I did the first time I stumbled into the backseat of her cab. Perfection was what I saw every time I looked at her. Ella's gorgeous curly dark brown nearly looked black underneath the bleak lighting. She looked more surprised than pissed off. I take it as good sign for now. Besides I was more distracted by what she wore to bed.

Ella's matching set of very short green silk pajama was doing something to me. It took all of my willpower and then some to not stare at the shape of the nipple ring underneath her top. It felt wrong to wish I was an article of clothing that got to touch her skin. It felt wrong wanting to know what her plump lips tasted like. It felt wrong chipping away the promise I made to help my friend. I needed a night off from being myself. An I hoped like hell I was saying this all in my head.

“Do you know this man miss?” He directed his question to Ella, but I sensed the distaste in his voice. His eyes flit between and Ella, then back to me. I open my mouth to say something, before I get the chance to Ella steps around him assessing me probably already spotting the bottle of wine dangling from my grasp. She stared into my eyes for the longest time and it felt like the two of us was sharing a private conversation despite there being no words exchanged. The warning signs going off in each of our heads were loud and forewarning. Thank God she wasn't listening.

Her voice sounding so unsure. "I'm afraid I do".

I took long strides bypassing the uptight doorman. With the rim of the bottle swinging between my fingers I lunge it into his arms. A dick move I know. Tonight I was so far gone I didn't know what I was doing. I think the best part was that I didn't even care. I could tell she was trying to control her breathing by the way her chest would rise and fall in a rhythmic pattern. If only she knew I was the one nervous around her or maybe a little drunk because my coordination was starting to falter. I almost stumbled backwards and missed a step.

Ella reached forward grabbing onto my shirt, all night this was the closest I got to her. Her body shuddered against mine. Titling my head up just enough Ella's mouth nearly grazes mine and I bask in the feeling of her touch. For a second we wade in this feeling of now or never. "We should get you inside." Ella says in a hush tone. A small white cloud came from her mouth as evidence the temperature was dropping.

"That sounds ideal." I take in a sharp breath revealing in the fact that Ella hasn't released her hold on me yet.

"Sam would you mind holding the door for us?" So the rude bastard has a name.

"Really?" Ella gave me a disapproving glare and I just laugh to myself for actually having said that out loud. Her grasp on me is firm and I'm conscience enough to not lean all of my weight onto her as she helps guide me into the building. I know I shouldn't go inside with her. I don't need to disrupt her life anymore that than my fucked up problems will probably do on its own.

"Watch your step." Ella's voice was so damn beautiful and calming. Two sisters whether they knew it or not had me torn between a sacrifice and my salvation. I just hope Skylar could forgive me for whatever happens next. {To be continued.}

[bandaidsforaids]

Two Ghosts

Note to the reader: This is a travel essay I had passed already. Originally, this was a test blog, but it fit the theme of my blog so much that I decided to keep it. This is not part of the five essays to be graded for this blog. It’s like a free taste of my writing - devour it, enjoy it. 

It had been one week since.

I was in a 13C jeepney, somewhere in between a classmate and someone else. That someone else could have been anyone - a boy wearing a face mask or a girl clutching her Jansport backpack or a child and his mother or his father or hers. Whoever it was, I wouldn’t have known. All I knew was, in that moment, I was staring at the distance as the scenery shifted passed me rapidly. The gasoline station with a couple taxi drivers smoking. The carinderia that housed an annoyed woman swatting flies with her hand. The group of boys coming from their own school, enjoying the walk to wherever. My eyes observed these things, but, if you had snapped your fingers in front of my face, I doubt I would have blinked.

Because my mind was elsewhere.

My mind was sat in an audio visual room, somewhere in between an uninterested college kid and a chatty high school student. Then you over there. You with your ribbed t-shirt and denim skirt. You, getting awarded for having joined a Mathematics quiz bowl. You, smiling for the camera, as I hollered your name from where I was, phone out to film you. You, walking back to me with a playful smile, waving your hand at my camera, telling me to stop.

And we did. We did stop.

“We’re here,” my classmate Anika poked me. As I exited that jeepney with ten of my classmates following suit, and the cloud of black smoke pumping from it vanished, I saw the logo of your school and thought: I’m back. I’m here. In this now-haunted place.

In big, bold letters: University of San Carlos.

Now, mind you, I was there for research. My group wanted to find non-online sources to back our study. It’s just a twist of fate that your school happened to have the biggest library in Cebu (or at least that’s what you told me). Four levels high and digitally advanced - computers flocked the place for identity scanning and resource finding. Nothing like in my school. Your library was so big, they allowed food inside. Your library had dining areas and couches and chat rooms and books of all age and race - first floor: References; second floor: Fiction; third floor: Sciences; fourth floor: Humanities. And that was just one side. The other side was for the Filipiniana section where all the theses and research papers laid to rest, to be brought back to life by the likes of me. Your library was a labyrinth. Did you know that?

Of course you do. Because you were the one who brought me here in the first place.

“After we go to my block, I’ll show you that - our library,” you said as you pointed towards an anomaly of a structure. USC seemed to have no architectural coherence. Every building felt out of place. I didn’t like the look of it at first glance, but you looked so proud pointing it out to me that all prejudgment fell to the hands of pure, undeniable affection.

“Is that it?” Edric asked, pointing to a brown building that sat beside a large patch of grass. It was an understandable mistake. Nothing here made sense. “No,” I told him. “That’s the humanities department. They have book sales there every now and then.” They all stared at it, amazed. I was shocked too - who knew borrowing your words would come so easy to me?

Everyone wowed at the sight of the glassy library as the jeep stopped and ushered us out. I was at the forefront when we approached it. Men ready to embark on a journey - making jokes, pointing at things, laughing. I was laughing too. Nervous laughter. Because when we entered the library it almost felt like a hurricane had befallen.

God, if only it was that easy.

God, if only I had not been thrown into a sea of green uniforms, into a sea of people who chattered and murmured like you. If only I had not been so delusional to assume you would be there, sitting with your friends, with your green polo and skirt, facing me when I arrived, like you had been waiting for me to appear.

Anika had to break me from my trance. “Let’s do this quick. I have to go in a while.”

Oh yes, she was meeting up with her friend Mayol to attend the novena mass in Sto. Nino.

Actually, she was meeting up with your classmate Mayol. Your friend Mayol. I recalled the time you got mad at me for not remembering the names of your friends. Lucky for you, however, I did my homework - I remember Mayol. You’ve done it. Assigned me an insignia. The ability to know names I could never place to faces. Names I can only place to the memory of you.

I thought of all this in the ten minutes it took to scan through three computers for possible resources. In the end, we only came out with two. A thesis and a book - both on the fourth floor. I guided Anika to the stairs, discussing our game plan to find books, when someone broke us off.

“Mayol!” Anika shouted, running towards the girl in question. I was too scared to look back, thinking maybe you were there beside her. Thinking maybe Mayol had told you and you decided you would come along. To talk to me. In the flesh.

But I looked back and it was just her. In a hug with Anika. Her face dug into her shoulders until her eyes met mine. And she knew. She knew who I was.

But did she know what had become of us?

In the jeep, I had given Anika the permission to discuss the sensitive topic. It was their first line of conversation as the three of us made our way up to the fourth floor. I made sure to keep a distance from them, but still I remained attentive to what they were saying. I wanted to know what Mayol would say. I wanted to know if they will be your words coming out of her mouth.

Yet, all I heard was Anika’s confused voice saying, “You didn’t know?”

Then Mayol, glancing carefully at me, whispered, “She never mentioned it.”

It came off her tongue so easily. I journeyed up the stairs faster, passing each level, barely reading the signs. I reached the fourth level, a dead end. As I entered the room to the humanities section, a distinctive jingle from chimes rang in my ear. For a second, I stopped thinking and just let it ring.

You know me, I’m not the type to lose my focus when I need it. But this time it took every single piece of me not to detract from my research. I was reading out every letter, every number on those book shelves precisely, trying not to hear the words from Mayol’s mouth replay.

You. Never. Mentioned. It.

How could you, after two years of being together, not ever have mentioned it? To your “friend”? I sat down, flipping through the book I needed while Anika and Mayol fled to find the thesis paper. They had to go in a while. Good, I thought, I’ll be all alone as usual.

I did my best to focus on the book at hand, but my eyes were getting glassy. I turned on the fan to escape the heat, but the whole room seemed to burn around me. Then, in a hurry, Anika slammed the thesis on my table. I looked up at her and she said anxiously: “We have to leave. I hope you’re okay.”

“Can we hug?” I asked you. It was 4:00. Our day in the sun was coming to a close. We had just finished taking photographs next to the cornelia flowers besde the humanities building. We had finished scouring your arena (which you claim is “huge”). We had finished buying Real Leaf and Coca Cola from your canteen, finished sitting on the first floor of the building nearest the gate. Your car was here. My Angkas was on its way. I don’t even recall when we last hugged.

“We’re in school, Aidan,” you said. “I don’t think it’s appropriate.”

I looked sadly at the floor. I wore my favorite shirt to meet you.

“Plus, I have to leave.” You read my gloomy appearance. “Are you okay with that?”

“I’ll be fine,” I told Anika. I smiled to cement it. I don’t think she trusted my word, but she left anyways. And, yes, I sat there, only then realizing I was indeed alone in the fourth floor, and I began to pace the room. I felt like a ghost. I was walking through the halls of the library, passing the chipped shelves and dusty books, passing the diorama of the history of the Philippines and the Supreme Court, passing the dirt-filled windows that separated me from the gorgeous landscape of Cebu City, and I could not contain myself. I was breathing heavily, trying to match my breath with my heartbeat. I could not keep myself at one place. My feet were moving on their own. My ears ringing. My mind chasing my feet. You didn’t care. By the end of it all, you just stopped caring. Two years and every evening you told me you loved me, but, somewhere along the way, that must have faded. I don’t know when it did. I doubt I’ll ever know. I doubt that if I had not come here to this cursed school I would have ever known you had stopped caring. Because you didn’t bother. And I wish you had told me you didn’t sooner so I didn’t have to bother either.

I looked at the floor beneath me. I thought of the height I was on, like I was on an airplane with the ground so far beneath me. I thought that if I grabbed a hammer and smashed the tiles to pieces, dug a hole that reached the bottom of this school, if I unwired every plug here, uprooted every plant, bulldozed every building, scraped this entire place off - would it stop being so haunted? Would the ghosts of you and I vanish? If I broke every glass window in this very building, ripped the spines off the pages of each book here - would it take away the moments we spent? Would it make you vanish, finally…

Or would it make you stay?

The jingle of the door rang. I crouched behind one of the shelves. For a second there I swore I saw your figure. I swore I saw your signature walk, your casual hair flip, your minute stature. For a second there I swore I saw the girl who I spent two years of my life madly in love with. For a second there I swore I was going to leap from where I was and embrace you and for a second there I swore you would have embraced me too.

But, no. In between the shelves, the figure came to focus and it wasn’t you. Up to this day, I still don’t know who it was. I just remember standing up from where I was, walking quickly towards the door, and letting the jingle of its chimes ring in my ear one last time.

I sat on the second floor, the portion of the library where we were allowed to dine and I watched Nightcrawler. My friends would try to open conversation with me in between their book-finding, but it would be short and pointless. They came and went, each hugging me before they left, until, eventually three of us were left in a dim-lit, closed library.

There were no more jeeps to accommodate Edric, Chantal, and I for our ride going back to the gate. So we walked. The three of us walked the stone-paved roads you and I walked when we were here. We passed by all the landmarks - the humanities building, the canteens (your school had a lot), the arena. Snapshots of the both of us would appear from time to time. Your voice. Your hands. Your laugh. A supercut of the two of us here. When I passed by the same bunch of cornelia flowers we had taken pictures with last time, I dared to pick one out, plant it on the ground, and drag my shoes on it. To destroy the flower from petal to pistil to stem. To let its pollen drown on the floor, break out into the air.

But beautiful things like those didn’t deserve to be disrespected.

As the three of us stood outside the gate waiting for our cars, I told Chantal all about what had happened on the fourth floor. She sympathized with me and her sympathy reminded me of something she used to say before: “In ten years, you’ll forget this. None of this will matter.”

But maybe I won’t. Maybe I won’t not because I can’t, but because I don’t want to. Because what we had was first love. What we had was magic and pain and overflowing emotion.

What we had was beautiful.

And I wasn’t going to disrespect that by forgetting it.

So, here, I write this to immortalize you. To immortalize us. To immortalize my journey back to the place that once contained our love. I write this to immortalize us, so we can no longer be ghosts roaming around the same empty, haunted halls of University of San Carlos.

We would just be humans. Two separate humans. You. And I.

And, for a second there, I decided I could live with that.

I hopped inside my car when it arrived, brought my head to the window, and watched as your school got smaller and smaller, until, finally, finally, I couldn’t see it anymore.

[bluerosetarot]

Like The Angel

Like The Angel – V/Reader 1/?

//OKAY so this was supposed to be a one-shot that turned into a fluffy story that I just had to keep going because V deserves some happiness! V/Reader pairing, fluffy now but I honestly don’t know where I’m going with this. Just kinda filling in the month between the original Urizen fight and the events of the game.

'I swear I'll be gone in the morning I just need somewhere warm to close my eyes ' Voices Off Camera (acoustic ver.) -Rise Against

Near the outskirts of the city, V watched the Qliphoth rise into the sky with a sour expression. Even this far out it dominated the skyline. It had only been three days since Dante had been defeated and he had been forced to retreat with Nero yet...

“That thing is growing faster than a weed!” As if reading his own thoughts, Griffon spoke in his shrill tone. “Think human blood works this good on normal plants? Maybe it'll spark a new greenhouse craze. You never know with how weird humans can be.”

“Hmph. I doubt humanity will rush back to the days of human sacrifices to appease gods of harvest.” His eyes cast down to the book in his hands, casually leafing through pages despite having the entire book memorized. The illuminations of the text brought back familiar memories of childhood.

'Happier days for certain...'

With a sigh he closed the book and placed it back within the inner pocket of his jacket. His growling stomach reminded him that he hadn't eaten for nearly two days now. He could always scrounge up whatever hadn't been looted from the convenience stores; however being this far out from the tree houses and businesses still had power and other utilities running, as of yet untouched by the roots snaking through the ground.

V stood, relying on his cane to get him up from his seat, catching Griffon's attention. “What's up, boss? Thought you didn't want to move too much since you're crumbling like cheap plaster.”

“Between falling apart and starvation, I'd rather the option that gives me the longest lifespan.” An eyebrow quirked up in curiosity as he took a long sniff of the air. Hunger had sharpened his senses somewhat, and he could tell someone hadn't evacuated this area yet by the lingering smell of something cooking. “And as fortune would have it, we might be able to persuade someone around here for whatever is making that delicious smell.

Making his way through the alley, V found the source of the smell. Three stories up the apartment building that faced him was an open window into what looked like a kitchen. If he was quick, he could go up the fire escape, grab some food, and be gone before the occupant was any the wiser.

“Griffon, if you please.” He motioned to the ladder that was currently out of reach.

“Why not just have me fly in and get some while you're at it?” Despite his protest, the bird demon did as he was told, bringing the ladder within reach of V's unsteady hands. Slow and quiet he made his way up the fire escape, pressing his back up against the brick next to the window before peering inside.

The kitchen was small and unremarkable, but he could see what he thought was some kind of roast, freshly pulled out of the oven and set to cool before carving up, accompanied with various root vegetables. The sound of footsteps made him pull back, but not before he saw you. Pressing himself back against the cool brick, he felt his heart beat fast within his chest. 'Heavenly beauty given Earthly form...'

Chancing another glance through the window, your back now turned to him, his gaze lingered on your frame. Griffon, with his always terrible timing, squawked up at him. “You gonna just look at it or are you gonna take some?”

Whipping around with frightened eyes, you brandished your carving knife towards the window, nearly screaming as you saw an unfamiliar man peering through your window.

“I swear to god you take one step through that window and I... I'll cut you!” Your words came out stuttered and frantic, but to your credit you stood firm before someone you could only assume thought you'd be an easy target to loot.

A quick glare in Griffon's direction was followed by V raising his arms in an appeasing gesture. “Please. This isn't what it looks like...”

“Oh really? What's it look like to you? Because to me, it looks like a strange man is trying to break into my apartment, probably taking advantage of the chaos happening downtown and thinking he can come and take whatever he pleases!” You stopped for a sharp inhale of breath, jabbing the knife in his direction. “But please, correct me if I'm wrong!”

Your bravery and quick wit in an otherwise unsettling situation made him pause. Indeed, the original plan was to just break in and take some of that delicious food that was still teasing his senses by how amazing to smelled to his starving body. He hadn't expected the owner of this abode to be so... lively, though.

“Please... I mean you no harm I just....” There was his stomach again, explaining to you better than words exactly how hungry he was. “...It's been a few days since I'd eaten and your food it smells... heavenly.” A few tense moments passed with you just looking at him, completely dumbfounded and at a loss for words. Finally the tension broke as you let out a loud laugh, shaking your head as your nerves finally got the best of you. Keeping the knife close you wiped away a tear with your free hand, whether from mirth or stress he couldn't tell, and you gestured for him to come in.

“Yeah. I can see you're not in a good place. And if you'd been here to kill me, steal from me, or, y'know... worse. You wouldn't have let me even wave my knife at you.” Once inside you motioned to the table. “I only have one proper dining chair. It's just me here and I don't have many guests. Sit, I'll make you a plate.”

Sitting with a sigh, V watched you intently. “Are all the denizens of this city so accommodating? Just letting random people come in for dinner through the fire escape?”

His dry humor made you chuckle, waving off the comment. “Nah, although I'm not originally from here anyway. Small town a couple days drive from here. Thought I'd be able to make a good living here. But I'm not here an entire month before everything goes to hell.”

Setting the plate down in front of him, you leaned against the wall and watched him. “Don't eat it too fast. If you've been without food for awhile I don't want you getting sick. You don't look too well to begin with.”

Despite his desire to wolf down everything in font of him, plate included, he nodded. Taking a small bite of what turned out to be a roast as good tasting as it looked and smelled he savored it slowly.

“This is the best food I've had in my life.” Which was technically correct, everything else he'd been eating since his 'birth' was what he could scrounge up from looted stores, never had he had such perfectly prepared homemade food.

“Thanks. To tell the truth I'm trying to use up what food I have left before getting out of here. Nobody has been clear on what's up with that crazy looking thing on the horizon but it doesn't help that anyone who gets close doesn't come back.” You pulled a folding chair from a storage closet, sitting down to his right and digging in to your own food. “If the power or water go out, I'm out too. I don't have enough pride to keep me from turning tail back to my parents' place.”

Your eyes lingered on the strange bird now taking up the entire windowsill, inwardly remarking on how huge it was before addressing it directly. “Hey, uh, big... guy? You want some food? I bet you're the one I heard when I found your leader in my window.”

Griffon had been unusually quiet, just watching the two of you in amusement. “Nah, sweetheart, I'm a demon. If I wanted something to eat it'd be you. Not that it doesn't smell great.”

You looked back between Griffon and V, raising a questioning eyebrow in the latter's direction. “A demon. Really.”

“It is a long story. Nothing like proper dinner conversation with a beautiful woman.” He hadn't meant for that last part to slip out, surprising you both.

“Oh wow. You must have been really hungry, you're delusional!” You laughed, despite looking away V could see the faintest of pink tinting your cheeks. “Or you're buttering me up to get more food. Which if that's the case, go ahead.”

His plate was already empty and he was grateful you were offering seconds. “You're absolutely sure? Were you taking any of this with you when you left?”

“I mean, yeah I was, but you need it more than I do.” Your smile was so genuine it made his heart skip a beat. Your kindness to a complete stranger, despite not even knowing his name, nearly brought him to tears; he had begun to doubt his faith in humanity but you helped restore it. “Besides, I've got some more food that I want to prepare, make sure it doesn't rot if I have to hoof it. Eat your fill.”

“Thank you, I sincerely mean that.” Eagerly he put another portion of meat and veggies on his plate, returning to sit with you. “I am V, by the way. I realized I hadn't introduced myself while I was standing in your window.”

“Interesting name. Is everything about you so mysterious?”

“Only when I want to be.”

That got a smirk out of you before you introduced yourself. When you told him your name he smiled, where others had names that didn't quite fit, yours seemed perfectly matched. Your voice, your presence, everything about you was soothing to him  Was this what life as a human could be like? Friendly conversation and pleasant company?

'I'd be lying to myself if I said I never wanted more of this. It's.. nice. But not an option open to one like myself.'

Once you both had your fill of food, you packaged the rest and set it in the fridge. “There. As long as the power doesn't go out we've got lunch for tomorrow,” closing the door you looked at him over your shoulder, “at least if you're staying. You don't look like you've got a place to stay.”

He looked out the window, even with it facing the alley he could tell it was only just now nearing sunset and he wasn't remotely tired. But the idea of spending more time near you, just in the presence of you, made him smile. “Only if I'm not troubling you.”

You rolled your eyes at him, returning his smile with your own. “Climbing in through my window, helping yourself to my food, and sleeping on my couch nah you're not troubling me at all.” The sarcasm was thick in your words, your eyes twinkling with enjoyment as you looked at him.

“Very well, kind angel. Lead me unto your living room and I shall make my bed beneath your roof.” With an exaggerated bow, he followed you into the hall as you chuckled at his poeticism.

The two of you spent most of the evening sipping mugs of warm tea, with you trying to pry out whatever V could tell you about what was happening downtown. He wouldn't oblige you much, but what he did say made your blood run cold.

“So this... tree thing...”

“Qliphoth.”

“Yeah yeah, the qliphoth, it's draining people of their blood in some sort of ritual? Why is it just now happening?”

V was silent, he didn't want you to know too much. You seemed so bright and if he let the wrong thing slip he didn't doubt you being able to string things together. Pure selfishness on his part; he feared you abandoning him if you knew the truth like it seemed everyone else had in his life.

“Suffice to say a powerful demon has awoken and is seeking the fruit of the tree to become king of the demons.”

“Heh. Magical fruit and someone trying to become a king. Sounds like One Piece.”

“I don't follow. That's from a television show I take it?”

“Yeah. Watched it as a kid when I was really big into that kinda stuff.” You outwardly cringed at the memories of your younger days, taking another sip of tea before eagerly changing the subject. “So what makes your demon bird different from the other demons?”

“I got a name, sweetheart. Griffon. One of Shakespeare's familiars.”

Your eyes glittered with curiosity, obviously picking up on the wording that he had others. “One of? So you have more? Can I see?”

Casting a glare at the bird currently perched on the back of your armchair, who was puffing his chest out in a smug display, he returned his eyes to you and nodded. “They are under my control. Well, two of them anyway, and I can show you Shadow.”

There was a change in the atmosphere around him that even you as pure human could sense. Almost like the air before a summer rain, thick and heavy, as the ink on one of his tattoos faded and formed into a large black panther in front of him. Instantly the feeling faded as what you presumed to be Shadow looked back towards V questioningly.

“Oh. My. GOD! He's so... cute!” Your love of cats won out over your self preservation as you reached out to touch him. Shadow had other ideas, backing away from you with a hiss as his tail grew to slap your hand away. “Ow. Did his tail just grow? And become solid?”

“My apologies again. Shadow is different from your typical housecat. A being made of what I can only describe as shadows given sentience. He can mold and shape his being into anything. Spikes, blades, hardening to protect himself... he's quite the useful familiar.” If cats could look smug, this one was doing a good job of it, enjoying V boasting about him.

“Sorry, Shadow. I guess I was kind of rash... Are you like big bird over there and only eat humans? Or do you want something to eat?”

“Big bird?! After I've been complimenting you this entire time! See if I call ya 'sweetheart' ever again.”

Shadow tilted his head, obviously curious to what the human was offering. He couldn't speak, but Griffon, after being cajoled by V, translated his growls. “He says 'yeah'. If you have any meat he's game for it.”

Smiling brightly, you nodded and got up to make the creature a plate of roast with V watching your every move. Griffon fluttered over to perch on the back of the couch he was sitting on and did his best to whisper. “Y'know you shouldn't get your hopes up. You've got... what, a few days? Weeks? A month, tops. And if she finds out about you and your 'other half' she'll definitely be gone.”

V sighed, listening to the clinking of plates and serving spoons as you moved about in the kitchen. “You're not telling me anything I don't already know. Look, we need to wait for the boy to heal and get stronger. Might as well bide our time here where we have a roof over our head and food to eat....” He stopped, looking to the doorway and back to Griffon. “Besides, I feel indebted to her. The least we can do is make sure she gets out safely before the final battle most likely takes out the rest of the city.”

“Whatever you say, boss, but you get so easily attached.” His tone was taunting, knowing V's mind inside and out. Hearing you approach V tapped the head of his cane on his beak to silence him.

You came back through with a plate, setting it down before Shadow who sniffed it before beginning to eat, voicing an appreciative chirrup to you between bites. “Oh good, looks like he likes it too! Not too late for you to at least try it, big bird.”

“Will you stop callin' me that? And why would I eat something that gives me absolutely no nutritional value.”

You shrugged with a smile. “Humans eat all sorts of things that they don't need to eat but want to because it tastes good.” Picking up your glass of tea and finishing it off you gestured to the cup. “Tea, especially herbal blends that have no caffeine like this stuff, don't really give humans anything except a good taste.”

“Yeah but humans are weird. You do all sorts of things you don't need to or really shouldn't do.”

“Maybe it's just a human thing, but you've never done something you didn't need to but wanted to? Ever flew through the air doing spins and flips and just feeling the wind through your feathers for the enjoyment of it?”

“Whatever, sweetheart, humans are weird, end of story.” Griffon dematerialized, flowing back onto V's arm as another intricate tattoo.

“That means you won. Griffon can dish it out but not take it.” V smiled at you, carefree and enjoying this moment of closeness to another human. His body was fighting sleep, though, making him yawn.

Taking his empty teacup to the kitchen you returned with some blankets from the linen closet. “It's not much, but I have a spare pillow I can let you use too. And if you wake up before me, feel free to use the shower, towels are in the linen closet across from the bathroom.”

“If you keep this up I'm going to owe you a life debt, my angel.”

“Pfft, whatever. Food, a couch, and a shower does not a life debt make.” V could see you were blushing again. Just the faintest of pink rising to your cheeks but it made him feel happy. That he could stir emotion within another being that was something other than the contempt Dante gave him as Vergil. “I don't know how long this mess is going to plague the city. But as long as I'm here you have a place to come back to.”

That statement made his heart skip a beat and his breathing catch in his chest. 'To come back to'. He'd never felt like he had such a thing. The thought alone made his heart ache. Despite his body crumbling around him and the thought that he would have to give this up eventually, to tell you the truth or simply vanish from your life, he wanted to cling to this one moment of happiness as long as he could.

“I... thank you.” It was all he could manage, all that he could say without his emotions spilling out before you. He didn't want to bear his heart to you now, possibly ever, it was his burden to carry alone and it would be selfish to foist that weight upon someone as kind and pure as you.

It was your turn to yawn, smiling as you spoke. “It's no problem, V. I'm going to get some sleep now. See you in the morning?”

“Most definitely, my angel.” He enjoyed seeing you blush and vowed to see it enough in this short time that it and your face would be etched into his memory for all time. “Goodnight.”

[stagekiller]

@crimescupid​ || Meme || not accepting

Well, their “divorce” is officially over, as far as Harley is concerned. She’s gone off on her own for a few days && some little air headed cult girl really thinks she can act this way ? What a joke, not a very funny one either.

“Y'know, baby,” Harley hums as she enters. Hyenas trailing off into another room in a rapid prance, chasing some random smell once released from their leashes. “Yer brain is as mangled as that handsome face of yers if you really think…” a sudden pause, then a smile. “I’ll tell you more about it later, after all. You got a guest,” red && black leather boots step over a few things, going to a random spot to the room where she pulls out something, a sledge hammer, “I knew I left this here,” speaking as if she were in a normal situation, on a normal day.

Attention turns to the woman that had so brazenly offered to light Jerome’s cigar. Perhaps being gone a few days, perhaps the fact that she didnt recgonzie this one, made the cultist a little TOO brave or naive, as she doesn’t attempt move. Hammers is raised to rest over her shoulder, taking waltzing steps, then a skip, “I’m so rude fer not introducing myself. I’m Quinn, harley Quinn. You must be door nail, you know what goes great with nails? Hammers.” Harley adds, swinging the weapon towards her, however, making sure only the wood connects with the side of her face. Just enough to disorient them, && nearly knock out.

After the audible thud, && groan, harley reaches over, plucking said cigar from jerome’s lips, only to take a puff; blowing it back into his face, “these things are terrible for yer health, ” does she mean the tobacco, or cultist? “Lemme put it out for you,” a giggle falls from her lips before backs turned to him once more. Bending down onto her knees so that she may straddle over the cultist. Sitting on her chest. Free hand takes hold of the womans throat, just long enough for the her to take a gasp of air. Harley utilizes that opportunity to shove the still lit cigar as far down her throat as she’s able.

The need is done. Yet, Harley doesn’t take too much time to enjoy the sight of the other fighting for air as they claw at their own throat. Instead, like a satisfied child Harley hops to her feet, moving to plop herself onto Jerome’s, planting a rather forceful kiss. Then a small nibble to his jaw line. “Jerome, love muffin, ” she murmurs against his skin rather tenderly, “I’ll fuckin’ kill you,”

🃏 —PART OF JEROME WONDERS how Harley would react if she knew the full extend of his treason. The scratch of acrylics pressed to a strip of pale flesh exposed through his open shirt & flick of a lighter is merely the tip of the iceberg. It is too easy to lure them in; all he has to do is show some favoritism. It can be quick, but not painless. Harley and his groupies alike delight in thinking they are his favorite. Now, he can for sure confirm that the latter are delusional.

   Such was the case for Andrea - or was it Anna ? - whose jaw dislocates with a bold ‘crack!’ under Harley’s hammer. Jerome pays her presence no mind. He merely watches, sporting the hints of a cocky smirk. When his ‘ex’-wife approaches, Jerome calmly taps his fingers against the arms of his makeshift throne. One leg folded over the other, he barely makes a move to shift when she seizes his smoke.  “ Those are Cuban, ‘ya kno’. Pretty ‘spensive. ” Clearly bait, because they both know he doesn’t care for money. “ You’re gonna make it up to me or what? ”

    How would she react, he asks himself, if she knew that this poor little minx she’s currently choking to death was choking on a whole different kind of cigar a few minutes ago ? That sparks some glimmer in his devious gaze.

       Serves Harley right for leaving him to his own devices.

  Anna/Andrea - perhaps Alisa ? - offers a final pleading gaze towards him. He can watch the moment it dawns on her that Jerome will not make a move to help her whatsoever; oh, the way her features freeze when she realizes he just took advantage of her. How it must feel to have the breath choked out of you, feeling used and betrayed during your final moments... She coughs out a desperate swan-song; a plea.

                          What a horrible way to go.

     As his mistress approaches, the clown ought to admit there is something charming about her shenanigans. He is mostly pleased that she came back like a lost puppy - albeit disguised under that condescending attitude. When push comes to shove, Harley can’t live without him. How sweet...

    One arm rests on the chair’s, his feet only parting to accommodate her in his lap. Jerome smiles through a half-lidded gaze, cooing back in response. Her kiss, though not reciprocated, is allowed. “ Hmmm— tempting, but, no thanks. ” Free hand comes to rest against the blonde’s lean stomach, swiftly producing a blade. He is quick to press it against her, just enough to make it noticeable. A nod to the side. “ Your stuff’s over there in the corner. ”

    Word is for a fat sack of ashes. There’s some remnants of fabric and melted plastic, but most of it is burned to a crisp. Isn’t that what any petty ex would do?

“ Well. What’s left of it anyway. ” Despite pressing a blade to her stomach, Jerome steals a moment to have a good whiff of Harley’s perfume and growl. “ Boy, have I missed your pretty face, sunshine ~ ”

[urdbell18]

Madamspellman Teacher AU Chapter 2: The One With the first Day That Came From Hell

Yay chapter 2! So I’m going to be posting new chapter every other Sunday/ Monday. Once again my lovely beta Mostlygay fluff helped a lot to bring you guys this chapter. Enjoy!

September the third marked the day that Zelda became a working mother.

On Tuesday, her alarm went off at five AM. Vida whimpered but settled back down when Zelda turned it off. She showered and did her hair and makeup in the bathroom, usually she did all this at her vanity out of habit from when she shared the room with Hilda, but now it was to not disturb her daughter. So when she exited her room, shoes in hand to silence her presence, she was fully dressed, hair perfectly in place. Her makeup and everything about her was immaculate as she made her way downstairs for breakfast. At the hour still clinging to five she was the only one who was up, hard boiling an egg, placing toast in the toaster, and turning on the coffee machine. It didn’t take much effort and it was rather soothing listening to the bubbling of the water and the aroma of french roast coffee wafting in the air. At around six thirty Hilda came down, bubbly as ever, with Sabrina, still half-asleep, trailing behind her. Zelda was reading through the newspaper that came in the mail the day before. Sometimes it would be the local paper, but usually it was a paper from an outside source in another language. Mostly French or Russian, a hobby of hers that became a part of her routine, keeping the papers was new though. By seven, they would know if Ambrose came home, he’d come in a robe and slippers half desperate for a bowl of cereal. Zelda made her way back upstairs, she needed to be leaving for the school by seven thirty but she wanted to say goodbye to her still sleeping daughter. Vida was sleeping in the center of the bed on her stomach, still wrapped in her blankets and holding Oso by one of his fuzzy paws. Gently, Zelda fell to her knees by the bed where her daughter slept, pressing a kiss on the girls head.

“See you later my sweet girl.” Vida murmured a little and Zelda held her breath, fearful that she woke her daughter, but the girl settled down once again. As carefully as she did coming in, Zelda left, she made it to the door when her daughters voice stopped her.

“Mommy?” When Zelda turned back around, Vida moved so that she was facing her mother.

“Go back to sleep baby. Mommy has to go to work. Aunt Hilda will take you to school, I just wanted to say goodbye.”

“Okay. Love you Mommy.” Zelda couldn’t help the tears that stung her eyes, she just felt so much for her daughter, her precious little girl. Zelda went back and gave Vida another kiss, this time on her cheek. When they hugged, her daughter’s small arms felt warm and heavy on her shoulders.

“I love you too my darling.” The clock sounded the half hour and Zelda reluctantly left her daughters side, it wouldn’t look good if she was late on her first day. Hilda and Sabrina were waiting by the door, Hilda sent them off with a hug and a packed lunch.

Zelda made it with five minutes to spare. Before the holiday break she had everything already set up. Her first class syllabus as well this school year student planner were already set up on the desks, which she arranged in neat rows and attendance sheets on her desk, dated and ready to go. At the sound of the bell, students started trickling in, before the late bell rang she had all seventeen of her students for French 3, they made a strong impression on Zelda.

From there the day seemed to be going well. Her Russian and Italian classes went relatively well minus a poor freshman student who ended up in her class by mistake. It was at the start of period 4 when the day started to blow up in her face. At the end of third period she had to step out to use the restroom, it was only five minutes, seven tops, but when she came back her students, jocks by the look of their jackets, had destroyed her class room. Desks were pushed out of line and there were smudges on her black boards that weren’t there before, caused most likely by the football that was being tossed around. That same football smacked her right in the face. At least it got them to settle down. Despite the setback, and the stinging of her cheek, Zelda carried on like nothing happened.

“Alright students, listen up I’m only going to say this once. I don't like to repeat myself so if you miss it that’s on you. My name is Ms. Spellman and I am here to teach you Spanish not to be your friend, or your babysitter. I’m an educator here to educate a group of young adults, I expect you all to act as such. Which means I don’t want to see that football again in my class Mr. Grinwis, next time you lose it.” The whole class looked at him, he tried not to flush with embarrassment as he slouched in his seat hiding his football in his jacket. “By the end of the week I expect you all who didn’t read the supply list to have a composition notebook that will be used for this class and this class only. You will be leaving your notebooks in here, placing them in the designated bin for this class.” Zelda indicated the row of bins that sat on the window ledge behind her desk, each bin had a tab on the front that had the period and class. “Those of you who do not have a notebook by the following Monday will lose half a point everyday until you acquire one. Those who did read the supply list and already have a notebook will receive five extra credit points. By the end of class place your notebooks in the bin with your names written on them like they say in your syllabus.” Some of her students groaned while a few smiled, Zelda was already making notes on who was getting those extra credit points. “Now I won’t be going over the whole syllabus, I’m sure you can do that on your own, but these are some things I will point out…” She discussed the syllabus until the lunch bell, her students practically ran out of the room except Rosalind and Susie who lingered to place their journals, properly filled out, in the bin.

By then her cheek was killing her, she was hoping to avoid having to do it but it looked like she was going to the nurses office. The trip turned out to be a complete waste of time, the nurse asked her a bunch of questions before sending her with an ice pack and calling it a day. Zelda scoffed, making a mental note to keep aspirin in her desk, but couldn’t dwell on it. She was hungry for lunch. Lunch turned out to be a turkey sandwich with apple slices, sun baked chips, and a drink pouch that Zelda couldn’t confirm wasn’t for Sabrina. Zelda wasn’t going to complain. The ice numbed her cheek enough to get through most of her sandwich but by her apple slices it became difficult to chew let alone bite.

“That looks serious.” Mary Wardwell stood in her doorway again, this time to her private office where Zelda took her lunch, wanting some peace. “What happened?”

“Football to the jaw.”

“Boys.” The amount of venom in Ms. Wardwell’s voice would have surprised Zelda if she didn’t already know about her fellow teachers dislike for the football players. It was one of the reasons why Sabrina liked Ms. Wardwell. “Think that they can get away with anything. Here,” Ms. Wardwell held out a small white bottle. “I heard you might need these.” Aspirin, Zelda took two dry having finished the juice pouch. When she looked up ready to give back the bottle, Ms. Wardwell was gone leaving nothing behind but the smell of her perfume. For a moment Zelda thought she was delusional but she couldn’t have imagined the woman, the evidence was in her hands. Which led her to wonder, how did Ms. Wardwell learn about the forming bruise on her face?

“Auntie Zee are you okay?” Sabrina, it made perfect sense now. Rosalind and Susie were in her class when it happened, they told her niece and somewhere along the way Ms. Wardwell heard. Reassuring her niece took the rest of the lunch hour, but Zelda suspected that Sabrina still had doubts that she was truly okay.

Four o’clock could not be more of a relief for Zelda. She didn’t have anything to grade, first day of the school year and all, but Principal Hawthorne called a staff meeting when she was packing up for the day. It was a little irritating, she had cleaned and set up her black boards for the next day, her cheek was throbbing again, and all she wanted was to go home and be with her family, she missed her daughter terribly. Her irritation boiled to a seething rage when it became clear that the meeting was about football of all things. Mr. Hawthorne made it clear, in an off handed manner that just deepended her anger, that all staff members were to attend Greendale Highs first home game of the season which was this Saturday. It took him an hour to say this and she could tell that she wasn’t the only one that was not pleased with having to attend and having her time wasted with something that could be announced over the intercom or in a memo. Ms. Wardwell looked particularly murderous, she kept glaring, her eyes looked darker than their crystal blue color, and her fingers wouldn’t stop tapping against the long wood table that the teaching staff gathered around. She was the first to leave when they were dismissed, scowling in a way that everyone heard her as she walked out the door. Zelda was not that far behind her, gathering her things so that she could leave straight to her car, but Mr. Hawthorne asked if she could stay for a minute, considering what mood she was in he should be grateful that she planted her feet and placed on the most civilized smile she could muster.

“Was there something else you needed Mr. Hawthorne?”

“I just wanted to see how you were feeling after your first day. I heard about the um…”

“The football that was being thrown in my class and struck me in the face.”

“Yes, that. It looks quite painful.” Zelda didn’t need Mr. Hawthorne to tell her that. When she went to the bathroom not long after school let out she saw her own face and cringed. That blasted football hit her on the apple of her cheek, the bruise spread to look like she had a black eye and the color… no wonder her sixth period Chinese class wouldn’t look her in the face, it was ghastly, black and blue with a hint of red and her cheek swelled about half its normal size. “It was an unfortunate accident I’m sure?” That tone, it made her sick, because while it was an accident, if on the off chance it wasn’t it was going to be written as such and there was nothing she could do about that.

“Is that all Mr. Hawthorne? I’m tired and would like to start heading home.”

“Of course. Would you like an escort?”

“No thank you Mr. Hawthorne I can manage on my own.”

“Oh. Very well. What about Saturday? I know Greendale isn’t that big but did you need a ride to the game or afterwards?” A violent shiver went down Zelda’s back at the thought of being alone with Mr. Hawthorne, she didn’t like being alone in a room with him a car was just unthinkable.

“No thank you Mr. Hawthorne I’m sure I can manage. May I?” Mr. Hawthorne barely nodded when she, in a single swoop, took her case and coat and took her leave. When she glanced at her watch the time was four thirty, a whole half hour wasted, on something she didn’t care about when all she wanted to do was to go home and be with her daughter.

Ten minutes later Zelda was pulling up in front of Greendale Elementary, she remembered the building back when Sabrina was a student and it hasn’t change at all. Students waited with teachers as parents came in and out, most of them on foot, to collect their children. Students who had a sibling or relatives in the upper schools or in grade fourth or higher were allowed to walk home themselves, only with parental consent, at least that’s what Zelda remembered back when Sabrina was a grade schooler. Vida was waiting for her in the small school yard, supervised by a teacher as she and other children played on the jungle gym, swinging as high as her little legs could take her.

“Mommy!” When her feet touched the ground she ran over to Zelda. Hilda did her hair in pigtails they bounced like little springs. She scooped her daughter up, holding her close.

“Hello my darling, you have no idea how I missed you. Did you have a good day?” Her daughter just nodded, she was probably just as tired as Zelda was. Zelda located a teacher, another thing she remember from Sabrina was that only an authorized person (a list which was provided at enrollment) can take the child, if they were grade three or under one teacher would have a list of all the students and Zelda signed by her daughters name. Vida was asleep by the time Zelda placed her in her car seat, she looked peaceful, shadows of the woods and the leaves playing across her face as they drove home after a long day. Nothing felt better.

[nakamoto-aesthetics]

Skin | n.yt

synopsis: about a girl who is self conscious of her skin color. she thought yuta would leave her for a girl who has paler skin and a curvier body but yuta didn’t know this. he thought you were crazy; that was up until now.

pairing: boyfriend!yuta x poc!femalereader

genre: piles of angst, some fluff to make it up

warning: this is a very touchy subject, read other works if its too much.

inspiration: Malcolm & Marie (you guys really should watch it. (it’s on Netflix.) the movie is still on my mind despite watching it hours ago)

word count: 2.2k

“your fucking delusional that’s what you are”

“I’m delusional? how yuta, how am I being delusional please inform me” you pace back and forth while he sat on the bed with his head in his hands.

“she was an interviewer I don’t even know her. it was just two strangers exchanging a hug and that was all that was it.”

“wrong it wasn’t just a hug. did you see the way she looked at you, stroked your hands and chest while you both talked, and the way she hugged you? god, the way she hugged you..” you say almost as if you were talking to yourself. you shake your head thinking about it for the millionth time that night. “she was rubbing all her lady parts on you and guess what you did? just take a fucking guess” you stop in your tracks and look at him.

“I did nothing”

“e-fucking-xcatly. you did nothing, you just stood there and smiled at her. do you have any clue what that feels like to watch? it feels like a knife is piercing my heart,” you walk over to him and bend down to his level. “but you wouldn’t know what that feels like huh?” you say slowly.

“I know what it feels like” he looks into your eyes. his eyes were filled with hurt and anger. you’d done this far too many times, yelling at him for petty things but he never knew the root of your madness.

“oh do you really?” you scoff and look away.

“yes I do, you think I don’t get jealous when other guys are around you?” you chuckle at his words and stand up again, walking away from him.

“you sure don’t act like it bothers you” you reply.

“that’s because I don’t make a huge deal out of it because at the end of the day I’m sleeping in the same bed as you and they aren't. that’s how I get over my jealousy, maybe you should use that advice to your advantage.” he gets up and walks into the connected bathroom; taking off his dress clothes and jewelry.

“it doesn’t work like that for me” you slip off your dress, letting it fall to the floor only leaving you in stockings.

“and why doesn’t it?” you hear the shower water running. you pause for a second trying your best not to cry.

“because… it’s much deeper than that. what I’m feeling is not just jealousy yuta” that’s all you say before you hear him step in the shower. you sigh and put your hands on your face before taking off your stockings. you walk over to the walk-in closet and pick out a loose shirt and some underwear, that were of course yours.

you put it on and walk into the living room. you pick up your phone and put on some music. you felt the music instantly calm your spirit.

you danced around the room letting yourself drift into the mood. you closed your eyes memorizing your steps until a choreography formed. you repeated the steps, they were light and soft. it could’ve been compared to a ballroom dance, only you were dancing alone but you didn’t mind that. you let your mind dream for once as if you were in another land. it was peaceful and calming, you let your mind drift to a whole other universe. you wish it were real, that you were there in this moment, happy, content, satisfied, all those you wished at this moment.

you danced gracefully to the music so lost in the zone to even realize that a pair of eyes were watching you from afar. he watched your every move and the way your feet bounced of the ground delicately, it was refreshing for the both of you. music was the only thing filling your ears, no more yelling, or shouting. just peacefulness.

you ended in a final stance as the song ended. you stayed there for a little bit, too lost in your world. everyone was standing up and clapping for you. you felt happy for once, this was all you wanted, that was it.

arms wrapped around your waist and kisses were planted on the soft skin of your neck.

“that was beautiful princess” he trails kisses down to your shoulder. you opened your eyes slowly, trying to come back to reality.

“mhm” you say and lean against his chest.

“are you okay now?” he asks softly.

“yes” you smile softly and kiss his cheek.

“good” he grins and picks you up over his shoulder. your scream and protests get mixed in with his laughs. he smacks your butt and drops you on the couch. he pecks your face, making you giggle and push him away.

“don’t try to fight it” he pecks your neck and jaw. “I love you,” he says, the words sinking into your skin and running through your veins. they filled you with life but you weren’t gonna let them stay there.

“mhm,” you hum biting your lip. you hear his phone ring from in the other room.

“hold on princess I'll be right back, lets keep it like this please, happy thoughts only” he kisses your temple sweetly before speed walking to his phone.

you sighed and rolled your eyes. ‘fuck him’ you thought. it was so much deeper than jealousy, so so much deeper. a tear ran down your cheek swiftly but you didn’t wipe it, wanting to let yourself suffer.

you hear footsteps treading back to the living room.

“can I ask you something? and can you please answer truthfully even if it might hurt me?”

“yeah..” he answers slowly stopping in his tracks.

“do you think she’s prettier than me?”

silence.

that was all you heard after you asked the question. tears fell down your face, your mouth trembling as you gripped the couch.

“why would you ever ask something like that,” he pauses and shakes his head. “I thought everything was okay now? what happened?” a million thoughts were running through his head at this moment, you had his mind twisted right now.

“I fucking lied, that’s what happened. you thought everything was gonna be okay after a few wasted kisses and worthless words? well think again yuta”

“I’m so confused, why would you lie and say everything was okay, literally what was the point? you intentionally try to be exhausting on purpose; this is exactly why I think you're mental now because you do shit like this-”

“shut the fuck up!” you shout you couldn’t take any more of his words and chucked a glass cup sitting next to you at the wall. a loud sound was heard as the glass collided with the wall, it fell to the ground and broke into tiny pieces.

“what the fuck is your problem?” his voice booms throughout the whole house and he storms over to you. you turn around and look at him with tears dampening your face.

“what’s my problem? you really wanna fucking know?” your voice gets a little shaky.

“yes I do” his face expresses the way he’s feeling. he was past angry, he was infuriated at this point.

“my problem is that- I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I'm insecure. I’m really fucking insecure yuta and you wanna know why?”

“why?” he says in a hushed tone as his face starts to relax, his eyes softening up a little bit.

“because I’m black that’s why. it’s not that I hate myself because I don’t… it’s because I think you're embarrassed to be with me-“

“y/n-“ he says softly cutting you off.

“I’m not done,” you sniffle. you’d been waiting to get this off your chest for a while, so you were gonna get it all off your chest. “I think you think you would be happier with someone who has lighter skin, and a curvier body. I mean look at me yuta. I’m flat, my boobs, my ass- I mean just fucking look.” you turn to the side and he looks down at your body with hurt in his eyes before looking up at your face.

“I even considered getting plastic surgery because of you. I never had this problem before I met you, I was confident in my body and then the second you popped up it all fell apart. I’m so insecure now and that’s why I’m so jealous because I feel like you’ll leave me for them. After all, they’re pretty, curvy, and Asian; that maybe you’ll connect with them because they’re Asian or because she's Japanese and can understand you when you speak in your native language.” you shake your head. “they’re everything I’m not yuta” you say in a hushed voice as tears soak your face. it was like you were standing outside in heavy pouring rain, that’s how much you were crying.

“babygirl why didn’t you tell me you were feeling like this?” yuta says softly unlike his tone just a few minutes. his eyebrows were relaxed, his jaw softened and most of all his eyes had softened. they were now filled with worry.

“I’m s-sorry” you look down and start to cave in on yourself, sinking to the floor and hugging your knees. he sighs and looks down at you. he sits down on the floor and pulls you into his arms.

“that’s not how I think or have thought ever. I wouldn’t have dated you if I didn’t think you were beautiful inside and out. I always got angry because I couldn’t possibly understand why you’d get jealous over stupid things like that but I get it now.” he caresses your back as you sob into his shoulder.

“y/n you’re the brightest shining star in my galaxy so when you scream at me for stupid shit like hugging other girls or smiling at them. I look at you like your mental because, and I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I’m deeply in love with you, I want to breathe you, kiss you, love you only, not them. I am beyond obsessed with you.” he pauses and sighs.

“but I guess I didn’t do a great enough job of showing you how much I love you. Im sorry for not catching on earlier baby, you're beautiful y/n, so fucking beautiful. I love your skin color, your nationality, your hot ass body, your short curly hair, the language you speak, the way you think to the way you walk, every little fucking thing that makes you who you are, drives me insane y/n and I love all of it. I love all of you and who you are from the bottom of my heart” he strokes your cheek and kisses your head.

“and no I don’t want the Japanese girls because if I did then I wouldn’t be here with you in my arms. I would be with them but at this moment right now Im not because I don’t want them, I want you and only you. y/n don’t worry yourself over a silly little hug that lasts for 1 second and a smile that means nothing to me because when I hug you that hug lasts 10-20 seconds and when we smile at each other it makes my heart pound and my stomach fill with butterflies because i’m so in love with you and that’s the wholehearted truth.”

the atmosphere was filled with your light sniffles until it was filled with complete silence. both of you listened to the sound of each other’s heartbeats. it was so peaceful.

“I have a question” yuta whispers so low that you almost don’t hear him.

“yeah,” you said in the same whisper.

“is that what all of our arguments have been about this whole time?”

“…yes” you close your eyes and grip his shirt.

“did you not think I loved you?” he keeps the same soft tone.

“in all honesty, I’m not sure. I thought you were embarrassed to be with someone who wasn’t as pretty as the other, lighter-toned, and Asian girls”

“no that’s not true and you are pretty, scratch that, you are fucking stunning. you’re the hottest girl I have ever been with in my life and I mean that 200% percent,” he said in a normal voice tone. you laughed at the statement and he did too. the atmosphere was now a lighthearted one.

“get out of here” you laugh and sit up.

“what it’s true, don’t be mad because you can’t have skills like me,” he says playfully.

“oh really?” you laugh loudly.

“mhm now, can you give me a fashion show, please? I want to see all the new dresses you bought” he pulls you in for a quick peck.

“but I wanna cuddle” you pout.

“hmm okay but I want that fashion show tomorrow y/n” he holds your hands and caresses them.

“okay okay, I’ll do it tomorrow. now can we please cuddle? I’m tired”

“your wish is my command princess” he stands up and picks you up bridal style. you squeal and hold on to him.

“we’ll get the glass up later,” he says. there was still glass shattered on the ground from when you threw it at the wall earlier. he walked into your shared room and laid you down on the bed gently before crawling to the spot beside you, and finally, he pulled you into his arms.

finally, for a change, you were happy and content. yuta kissed your cheek and forehead occasionally; uttering sweet nothings into your ear as he drew circles on your skin. your smiles and laughs fill the room as they mix

everything was perfect now.

[orangeccreamsicles]

Dirk: => Theorize

TT: You know a lot about Sburb, don't you? TT: In the short time that I was a sprite, I cataloged as much information as I could, thinking it may come in handy. You could say that the knowledge granted to me could be categorized as "a lot". TT: That being said, I only know what a sprite would know. I’m not fucking omniscient. TT: Why? TT: I’ve been thinking about my future self.

TT: Ah. It’s not good to dwell on events out of your control or out of the realms of possibility TT: But it is still possible, is it not? TT: Under specific circumstances, I can foresee you becoming the you we were able to catch a glance of. Extremely specific circumstances. TT: And what about not becoming him, but becoming someone who ends up playing? TT: There is a greater possibility there. TT: That’s enough for me to want to do a little digging. TT: Fine. What is it you were looking to know? TT: Derse and Prospit are the two planets on which your dream self can appear, I know that already. Are there any conditions which must be met to appear there, and can they exist outside a session? TT: The game decides which planet you inhabit based, for the most part, on core parts of your personality, and just a bit of fuckery. TT: Alternates of myself have never appeared, separate from you or not, nor have any civilians, so I would deduce you must be an active player with their own form to appear. TT: I've known instances in which the moons and planets can be removed from their session along with its players, as well as instances in which a moon may be transferred to a new session, but there are no records of either Derse or Prospit existing independently from a session. TT: And my dreams? TT: They match very closely with accumulated descriptions of Derse. A purple planet, populated by black chitinous folks, violent in nature, and sensationalizing nobility not yet awakened. TT: A prince, a knight, a rogue, and a seer, tucked away in towers high above the general population, while a war stirs in the tabloids between the Dersites and Prospitians. TT: It is likely that your dream self has awoken early on Derse, but keep in mind that the possibility that these dreams are a reflection of your fears of the future taking form in rumors you’ve heard of a death game is also present. TT: Sure. TT: So. We may yet play the game. TT: We knew that the moment we realized who your future self was. TT: But the differences were large enough to disregard that future. What about now? TT: Now, it’s the same story. Nothing has changed, save for your newly acquired knowledge. TT: What about his cause of death? TT: That’s a different matter entirely. TT: Is it? Burnt to a crisp by a psionic. Have I pissed off any psionics that you know of recently? TT: The alternian empress has psionic capabilities. TT: Why the fuck would we be fighting the empress? TT: I’m not sure. TT: Who do you think it’s more likely would have killed me? An angry psionic from a separate timeline, unaffected by whatever may happen in this timeline but certainly affected by where I stick my nose and how far I take it, already known to be on bad terms, or a far off empress who barely acknowledges the Earth anymore, targeting some random fuck off already slated for death by a game created by who knows what. TT: We don’t know if it was just or heroic. TT: We can make a pretty good guess. TT: It could go either way. TT: One possibility is more likely than the other. TT: Perhaps. Don’t rule out other factors. You’ve met other psionics, we may meet more yet. TT: He was years in the future. We don’t know who killed him or for what reason. TT: We only know the cause. If that. TT: Didn’t he say you and Sollux were on relatively good terms? TT: He said that they were okay, but he fucked something up. I’d say this is as good of a fuckup as we’re going to get. TT: Fuck. I don’t want to see a worse fuckup than this. TT: Neither do I. It was pretty bad, dude. TT: Fuck off. TT: Oh, are we done? I can fuck off quite easily if you’re done wasting both of our times. TT: And by that I mean fuck off right back here, I’m not done. TT: Picking up on some of Vantas’ vocabulary, are we? TT: Pick up the pace. I may have all day but that doesn’t mean I want to spend it talking to you. TT: It’s still likely to turn out similar to the future we’ve seen. TT: It’s a possibility. One that’s more likely than, say, you turning into a murderous psychopath and killing everyone you know and love. TT: That’s comforting. TT: What else do we know? TT: He and Bo were matesprits up until his death. He and his session had yet to win. At some point he and Wig vacillated pale and pitch. TT: I can’t help but feel that last part is unimportant. TT: That’s all we know. What else do you want me to say? TT: Something more substantial than my imminent relationship drama would be nice. TT: I’ll be sure to let you know when you decide to talk about anything other than that. TT: Seriously, you do not shut up. TT: I’m lonely, I’m sad, I’m feeling angry and betrayed, can’t you find someone to vent to that isn’t me? Like Joanne! Or Roxy! Or Cass, I’m sure she’d love to know about how in the few hours after you came home and celebrated, you managed to fuck everything up! TT: Can we get back on topic? TT: Uncomfortable because you don’t want to confront your mistakes, aren’t we Dirk? TT: The future version of myself that we saw isn’t a self in which I’m able to become, at this point. TT: Correct. TT: But something similar is possible. TT: Likely, even, depending on how much of your dreams are real. TT: So. TT: So? TT: What do we do? TT: Don’t ask me, dude. you're the one this affects. I'm just the guy that runs the numbers and tries to keep you from getting too far into your own head. TT: By the way, I’m pretty sure that’s a thing you’re doing right now. TT: Is there a way to prevent the game if it’s already slotted to begin, or to stop it once it’s started? TT: Those two questions are, really, asking the same thing. TT: If it’s meant to begin, it’s already started. TT: In a sense, it’s always been running. TT: It’s already here, and all that. TT: The only solution I can see for now is to abandon this universe to be destroyed by the coming meteors, and escape to a new one. TT: Still, that is entirely hypothetical. Perhaps you’re doomed to play and it would simply follow you to your new world, dooming every subsequent place you choose to hide out in until the weight of the worlds you’ve killed drives you to face your fate. TT: Perhaps it doesn’t matter what you do. TT: ... TT: Too much? TT: I’ve been reading a lot lately. TT: You have a flair for the dramatic. TT: It has to have a beginning point, doesn’t it? TT: If it’s some sort of loop, there has to be a starting and ending point, even if they create themselves. TT: I have some theories regarding loops and Bro that you may want to hear out some time, by the way. TT: As if this conversation couldn’t get any more lighthearted. TT: The starting point would be the creation of the game itself, kickstarting events that would lead to the empowerment of the final boss, as well as the creation and destruction of the universe. TT: You’re getting a little off track. TT: Right. TT: The closest thing you could get to a starting point is the development and revitalization of old codes by the companies Skaianet and Crockercorp, depending on the universe. TT: Of course, those were only found, not created. TT: Those both sound pretty fucking familiar, dude. TT: They sure fucking do, man. TT: So Jane and Jade or Jake are responsible for the apocalypse game? TT: They had nothing to do with it in timelines I’ve studied. Plans for their development and release were far in development before either of them would have even be aware of their inheritance.  TT: So they could be in development now. TT: If they are, they won’t be released for a while yet. It’s kind of a big fucking deal in any timeline when they’re announced. TT: Great. TT: So the bottom line is, either I’m fucking delusional and seeing things where they’re not, TT: Entirely likely if you ask me. TT: I didn’t. TT: Or, we’re completely fucked, my dream self is awake, one of those companies are going to release a death game that we either ignore and go down with the rest of the world, or play and have an extremely high if not guaranteed chance of dying in some other horrific manner. TT: That sounds about right. TT: And even if we survive, that only heightens the chance that I’m going to fuck up yet again and piss Sock off enough that he burns me to a crisp. TT: The future is bright. TT: Fuck! TT: Lmao. The chances of any of these things happen individually are low enough, but the longer you go on the worse the chances get. TT: BUT. TT: If you’re so worked up about this then we can plant a copy of myself in Mom’s lab. TT: Skaianet has a subdivision studying and predicting meteor paths, that’s what she does. TT: Kind of suspicious that a company responsible for the end of the world VIA meteors has a branch dedicated to looking at them. TT: Or, it’s a major company that deals with all kinds of fields, the largest of all being the development of new technology, which happens to line up with the massive influx of advancements regarding space travel that communication with trollkind has brought upon us as a society.  TT: I like my theory better. TT: You would. TT: This is something that you’ve had on your mind for a while, yeah? TT: I’ll tell you right now, it’s not going to happen, and if it does, we’ll be able to figure it out in time to make a real plan about it. TT: So stop fucking worrying about it. TT: If there were a problem, I’d tell you. TT: You’ve made sure of that.

[group-noodle]

Running Together - Chapter 19

| AO3 | FF.N |

Ikuna was sitting cross legged amongst piles of old treasures in the dining area. Kurama sat at her tea table, a textbook and workbook lying open in front of him. It was unseasonably cold and rainy that day, and it was certainly having its effects on him and Ikuna’s cat. Henry was pressed against Kurama’s leg, warm and sleeping soundly through the sounds of the downpour floating in through the open glass door. She could see in the heaviness in his eyes that Kurama wished he could curl up listening to the rain, too.

“You know, darling,” Ikuna said absently, riffling through old papers, “the more I walk about the city, the more I realize how right you were.” He didn’t reply right away, and she was certain that he dozed off--as uncharacteristic as that would have been.

She glanced up at him. He was staring at her, again.

“Did you hear me?” she asked, caught a little off guard by his gaze.

He smiled. “Yes, you were telling me something I already knew.”

“Pfft. The ego on you,” she said. While he’d turned his eyes back to his books, she didn’t immediately turn her attention back to her papers. She still didn’t understand why he insisted on going to school when he had a job with his stepfather waiting for him, but if it meant that she would have more rainy days spent in comfortable quiet, then she wouldn’t voice her opinion too loudly. Even now, she drank him in—the set of his shoulders, the tension of his fingers scratching pencil on paper. He’d pulled his hair out of his face in a large clip, and she could study the lines of his brow and peaks of his cheekbones.

She began flipping through her papers again. Each one was easily worth fifty times the denominations that were originally scribed, but exchanging them would be incredibly tricky. She may just auction off another few art pieces instead.

She continued talking idly, more of a stream of consciousness than actual conversation, “Anyways, I spent all that time and effort crossing into this world. I planted myself into dreams and wiped myself from them. I bribed, I lied, exchange a favor or two. All of that to find that demons have been openly living here for years. Why, I saw three of them on the television just the other day! I feel increasingly foolish the more I think about it.”

“Ah. Well...” Kurama leaned back against the couch, holding his chin in thought, “I did find it odd how ill-informed you were. That isn’t like you at all.”

“Coming here was an impulse decision at best,” Ikuna sighed, “I didn’t take the time to research beyond King Enki’s first decree.”

“Your clients weren’t talking about the migrations?”

“I wasn’t taking any clients.”

Kurama’s eyebrows rose, “Why not?”

She swallowed dryly. She wasn’t ready to talk about this. Not yet. “I didn’t see the point,” she said carefully.

He could tell that there was more to it, “Then... What were you doing for the last three years?”

Ikuna laid her banknotes aside and scooted over to a collection of scrolls, picking through them and studying each with a discerning gaze before setting them aside of shuffling them back into the stack. “Living, I suppose. Or as much as I could.”

“Where were you?” Kurama asked.

“Still in the brothel.”

“Why did you stay if you weren’t taking clients?”

“It was someplace to call home,” she shrugged, unearthing her old pipe from under a few stolen drawings. She turned it over in her fingers. “And Himo didn’t dare tell me otherwise,” she said. She remained quiet for a moment, waiting for Kurama to speak. When he didn’t, “Well now, come off it! I won’t be feeling honest for very long, and I know you have more questions.”

“You stopped taking clients because you couldn’t feed from them without making yourself sick. You continued to live in the Makai because you needed the comfort of consistency, as you always have when you were feeling distressed. Then, in an uncharacteristic move, you came to the Makai alone without anyone to support or protect you.”

“That’s right,” Ikuna said, tidying up her belongings, “Well, now that that’s out of the way—”

“Except you moved to my city, in the neighborhood of my university.”

Ikuna’s lips drew into a thin line.

She wasn’t looking at his face, but if she were she would have seen the self-satisfied set of his mouth. She knew these were questions that had been weighing on his mind for a few months, but she hadn’t given him the opportunity to ask her.

She straightened her spine and sat tall. “It sounds to me like you’re implying something.”

“You moved here to be closer to me,” he said, only partially teasing.

She snorted. “What led you to that conclusion?”

“You chose to live here of all the places in Japan.”

“In the wealthier part of a university district surrounded by galleries, museums, and libraries?” she turned a bored expression to him, “You must be delusional.” If she could continue to pick apart his argument, he might get frustrated and give up.

“I agree that those are things you hold in high regard, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned about you, it’s that you find the wilderness to be much more soothing than a congested city. For instance, you would often retreat to the riverbank when you were wounded--”

She spread her arms out to her side defiantly. “Darling, I am clearly uninjured.”

He took a deep, quiet breath, held it, and let it out. “You very clearly came to this city seeking comfort,” he said evenly, “What I’m trying to ask you is why.”

“You don’t even have any proof to back up your argument!”

“I’ve already told you why I think you’ve come here, Onna,” he said curtly, “Honestly. I know you like keeping some things to yourself, but I can’t understand why you’re being so stubborn about this. About any of this.”

“Oh, I’m being stubborn am I? You’re being downright bullheaded!” Ikuna’s voice began to rise in her throat.

“Onna, you were quite literally wasting away to nothing when I first found you. You yourself expressed that your energy signature is too weak to be found,” he fought to keep his tone even, but his patience was wearing thin, “I’ve known you long enough to know when something’s wrong, but I’ve never seen you like this.”

She snapped. “What gives you the right to tell me about myself, anyways? It isn’t like you really know anything about me! The first time we’d spoken in fifty years was for intel of all things! Why would I want to speak to the man who kept a failsafe to kill me!? I left you for a reason!”

Kurama’s mouth fell open.

The silence that followed her exclamation was deafening. They both stared directly into each other as Ikuna’s face changed. She had the startling realization of what she said. She clapped a hand to her mouth, he eyes as wide as saucers.

“I... Kurama, I am so, so sorry. I don’t feel that way at all, I...” she trailed off, waiting for him to say something. A shadow passed over his eyes. He looked away.

“This must be how it felt for you back then,” he said, gathering his books, “When I would speak to you that way.”

Her heart dropped. “Kurama, no, please don’t leave. Not like this,” she clambered up to go to him, but he held up a hand. She froze half knelt on one knee. Tears threatened the corners of her eyes.

He picked up his books, but paused and put them back down as if commanded by some external force. He left his hands wrapped around the stack for a few long moments, fighting with himself. Finally, he released them and rubbed his eyes with a groan.

She timidly inched closer to the tea table, watching him for any signs that he didn’t want her any closer. She sat back on her heels, head bowed in shame.

“That...” he searched for the words, “That really hurt, Ikuna.”

Her stomach lurched at his direct use of her chosen name. She reached up to her horns, twisting her fingers around them anxiously. “I know. I said it to hurt you, and I hope that you know that there was no truth in those words.”

“No,” he leaned back, setting his head on the couch and staring up to the ceiling in thought, “You did leave, and for a very good reason. I suppose I assumed that we were passed it. Now that I think about it, we never talked through it like we should have.”

“I was so happy to see you again,” she murmured, “I thought I could let it rest. You appear to shy away from direct confrontation these days. I didn’t—I wanted... I wanted to hold onto you this time.”

Kurama heaved a sigh and dropped his hand from his face to the table, palm up. When he realized she wasn’t going to take it, he looked to her and took her hand from her horn. “Do you want to talk about it, now?” he asked.

“Right now?” she relaxed a bit and squeezed his hand, “Do you think we should, after that spat we had?”

He motioned to the balcony, the sliding glass door letting them see the ongoing downpour. “I’m not leaving anytime soon, and I think we should talk about it if we’re going to make this friendship work.”

“Could I perhaps pour myself a drink before we start?” she asked sheepishly.

The corner of his mouth pulled up despite himself. “Maybe one for me, as well.”

When Ikuna returned with glasses and a bottle she sat close to Kurama, enough that he had to raise his arm and set it on the couch behind her to accommodate for her presence in his space.

“Onna?”

“Hush,” she shuffled under his arm and pressed against his side, “Let me have this.” She poured two glasses of liquor and handed one off to Kurama. They sat sipping in silence, neither knowing exactly how to start.

“I suppose I’ll begin, then,” Kurama sighed, “I’ve lived in the Ningenki for two decades, and during that time I’ve learned a lot from the humans. Among those things are how to treat another being with kindness and dignity. You more than anyone know how strongly those lessons affected my disposition as I grew up for a second time. I realized how cruel I truly was to you. You were right. I am a different man from the one I was back then, but the fact still remains that I was that man. For that, I’m sorry. You deserved to be treated much better than that, and I hope that I can show you that treatment.”

Ikuna sat quietly for a moment, digesting Kurama’s apology. He looked down at her, gauging the expression on her face and waiting patiently for her to reply when she was ready.

“Would you think me rude if I ask you to apologize for one more thing?” she asked.

“I would be upset if you didn’t,” he replied.

“You called on me to bring you information of current events of the Kekkai, do you remember?”

He knew where she was going with this. “Yes. I even met with you in person a few times.”

“Three times, exactly,” she paused, “Well, four including the origami butterfly. I consider that to be a stroke of brilliance on my part, but I digress,” she took his hand, meeting and holding his eyes with sincerity, “Darling, calling on me in the first place was downright mean, but calling on me for something as impersonal as information? I suppose your mother instilled within you better manners since then.”

Kurama cracked a surprised smile. “Of all the things... You’re right, that was terribly rude of me, wasn’t it? In my defense, I recall our later meetings being more relaxed, but I’m sorry all the same.”

Ikuna leaned against the couch facing him directly. “Say, Kurama? Why did you call on me back then? Of all the other informants you know, why would you have chosen me?”

He hesitated, taken aback by a question that he’d never thought to ask himself. “I... I suppose I needed the familiarity. I had been here for ten years, and even though acclimating to my new environment was easy I still sometimes missed—” he paused to choose his words.

“Me?” Ikuna asked innocently.

He chuckled. “Yes, well despite your temperament you are very easy to miss.” He didn’t say anything more, and Ikuna internally cursed herself for interrupting him to begin with. When he stayed quiet, she chose to speak.

“I’m sorry for leaving you the way I did,” she said. She rested her head against his shoulder, tracing the lines of his palm, “Before you say it, yes you were a tyrant. I still feel the effects of that, but you never hurt me more than a few cold shoulders. Simply vanishing was no way to excise myself from our relationship.

“I’ve realized that I also displayed behavior unbecoming of a woman in trying to make you something you weren’t. I don’t endorse victim blaming, but I cannot deny my involvement in our dysfunction. I enabled you by continuing to stay and claw at your feet, even when I knew a return of affection was futile. I would like to apologize for my hand in that.”

Kurama sighed, good and bad memories flooding his mind in waves. Next to him, Ikuna fixed her gaze a thousand kilometers away, letting herself become equally taken up in her thoughts. Quiet nights, loud blow outs, cold greetings, warm sheets, bold proclamations, cowardly pleas. Ikuna touched her fingers to her chest. Kurama glanced down, catching her in the act. Guilt settled in the pit of his stomach. He sighed again.

“We weren’t very good for each other, were we,” he said. Somehow in pained him to say it just as much as it pained Ikuna to hear.

“No,” she said with a wry smile, “No, we weren’t.” She took a long sip of whiskey and topped off their glasses, thought Kurama’s was still mostly full.

“While we’re speaking freely,” he began gently, “I’d like to ask you to be more sincere with me.”

“What do you mean?” she demanded warily.

“You have this tendency to… forestall when we’re talking about something you don’t like,” he said cautiously, “It seems that you do it without realizing, but I hope you know that you can speak freely and honestly with me.”

Ikuna felt a protest bubble up, but snuffed it out. He was wrong in that she knew very well what she was doing, but she knew that of all people Kurama deserved her sincerity.

“I’ll be mindful of that in the future,” she said finally, “but only if you’ll do me the kindness of backing down if I express reluctance to speaking of certain topics.”

“That seems reasonable. I can be a little pushy with you sometimes.”

“Indeed, and while we’re on the subject of sincerity,” she drained her glass and huffed, “Yes. I did relocate to be near you. Are you pleased with yourself?”

Kurama’s eyes grew wide with her admission. He bit back a grin. “There, that wasn’t so difficult, was it?”

She sucked in her cheeks and pouted. “We hadn’t spoken since before you broke into the Spirit World Artifacts Vault—and yes I do know about that. I didn’t think you would notice my presence if I came here.”

He shook his head fondly and sipped his drink. “As I said when we first saw each other again,” he met her eyes, “I could never forget your scent.”

Ikuna’s breath hitched—surely he noticed—but she replied, “If I recall, your words were that you caught my scent, not that you couldn’t forget it.”

“Well, now you’re just being petty.”

She sniffed. “I told you I wouldn’t be feeling honest for very long. It seems your time is up. I’ll be returning to my work, now,” she swung her legs out from under the table to stand.

“Wait, wait!” he laughed and tangled her up in his arms to pull her back, “One more question.”

Ikuna wiggled out from his grasp, heart in her throat. “Fine. One.” She thanked her creator that her kind didn’t blush.

“Why did you move here?”

“I thought you decided that I’m running from something,” she sighed.

He shook his head. “What I meant was, why did you move so close to me?”

The answer to that was simple. Her efforts in information gathering weren’t spent on demon assimilation into the Ningenkai because they were spent finding Kurama. She moved to this neighborhood because she wanted to see him. She wanted to be able to watch him from her window as he walk by on his way to class, checking his watch, reading a book, smiling to the shopkeepers along the way. Hair fluttering in the breeze, steady strides to and from his destination. It was the comfort of knowing he would be there that lead her to this neighborhood. After everything they’d gone through, she just wanted to be somewhere near him when she finally withered away. It was a feeling so strong she wasn’t able to deny it, only push it further down and bury it.

“Well, I...” she trailed off. There was no lie she could tell that could get passed him in this moment. The only thing she could say was the truth. She forced a laugh, “Well, because I adore you, of course! Why wouldn’t I want to be near such a handsome face?”

Kurama chuckled and sat back, “I should have known you would say something like that.”

They fell into a comfortable silence, listening to the rain and feeling lighter than they had even before they talked. Ikuna hummed and leaned back against the couch. Kurama draped one arm across the cushions behind her and let his other arm rest at his side to languidly stroke the still-sleeping Henry. The afternoon continued on. Soon after, Ikuna noticed Kurama’s eyelids drooping again.

“Would you like a nap?” she asked softly, a smile in her voice. She brushed a lock of hair from his face. He blew a puff of a laugh through his nose and rubbed his eyes.

“I should get back to my studies,” he muttered.

“Hush,” Ikuna sidled away from him to make room and gently cupped his head, pulling him down into her lap, “Your books can wait for a few minutes.”

Kurama began to protest, but was stifled by a yawn. Finally, he stretched out and let his eyes drift closed. “Only a few minutes,” he murmured. Ikuna removed his hair clip and lazily ran her fingers through his tresses as she watched his breathing slow. He drifted off with his cheek pressed against her leg.

Kurama awoke to the sound of a tv drama playing at low volume in the background. Ikuna had stopped stroking his hair at some point and was resting her hand on his shoulder, tracing little affectionate circles with her thumb. Even with the smell of wet concrete wafting in from the balcony, he was still overcome with the scent of her skin. The whole scene felt so incredibly normal to him.

He turned his face up to Ikuna and rubbed his eyes, “How long was I asleep?”

She leaned down, pressing her lips to his eyelid. “Nearly an hour and a half, now. I know you said a few minutes, but I couldn’t bare to wake you,” she said apologetically.

“Heh, it’s alright. The rain makes me feel so lethargic I would have drifted off again anyways,” he didn’t make a move to sit up, instead adjusting so that he was on his back gazing at her. “I had a dream. Was that you?”

She shook her head. “What was it about?”

“The old bandit hideout of all things. Now that I’m awake, I don’t remember much else.”

“You don’t dream very often these days, do you?”

“Not if I can help it. I have too much to lose now.”

She caressed his cheek, “Is that what you dream about these days? Losing your family?”

“Yes. Sometimes I wish I had kept to my plan and left when I was a child,” he wrapped his hand around hers. “But then I wouldn’t have been there for my mother when she was ill.”

“And Enma knows where Team Urameshi would be without you. If there would be a team at all,” Ikuna smirked.

Kurama chuckled. “Yusuke is more capable than you think.”

“Nonsense, it seems to me that his strongest ability is dumb luck!”

His chuckle turned into a soft laugh. “I can’t argue that luck favors him, but he’s a little smarter than I think even he realizes.”

“Hm, I suppose you would know best. All I have is hearsay,” she moved her hand from his face to his chest, “What is the great spirit detective doing with his time these days? I heard a rumor that he was fired sometime around the Makai Tournament.”

“Yusuke runs a ramen stand. I would say that he seems happy with this peaceful life, but he picks up freelance detective work on occasion.”

“A ramen stand, eh?” Ikuna thought for a moment, “Can we go?”

“Of course. He sets up in his neighborhood not too far from where we met our friends last week.”

“I’m shocked you remember anything from that night,” she teased. He shot her a dry look. “Could we go right now?” she asked.

“To the ramen stand?” he glanced at the darkening sky outside. The rain had stopped, “I suppose there’s still time. His stand is open until late, but you don’t eat human food.”

“Well, it doesn’t hurt to go visit, does it?”

He grinned. “No, it doesn’t. Let me call my mother to let her know I won’t be home for dinner.”

They slowly detached from each other and stood. Ikuna stretched her legs, and sauntered off to her bedroom. “I’ll take this opportunity to excuse myself and slip into some more appropriate clothes, then.”

“Make sure you bring a jacket! It’s a bit chilly today,” he called after her. She poked her head out of the door and quirked an eyebrow at him. “Don’t look at me like that. If you want to fit in you should wear a jacket.”

Ikuna rolled her eyes and disappeared back into the bedroom. “I think you just enjoy nagging me, Kurama,” she said from the bedroom, “You are well aware of my immunity to cold, yet you cover me with blankets and insist I dress in layers.”

“Onna, you have a goose-down duvet.”

“I fail to see your point. What does my taste for fine textiles have to do with your lust for caregiving?”

Kurama found himself leaning against the doorjamb, talking out into the living room. “One could argue that your tolerance for cold climate has weakened with age.”

Ikuna stuck her head out of the doorway, glaring at him. “Kurama, you take that back this instant.”

“Oh?” he laughed, “Everyone grows old, Onna! It’s nothing to be ashamed of!”

She growled and huffed back into the safety of her bedroom. “Don’t you have a human to call?”

“Ah! Right, I should get to that. Hurry along, Grandmother.”

There was a beat of silence before he could hear the stomping of her heels striking the floor as she charged him. He whirled around and pulled the door closed before she could reach him, laughing heartily at her empty threats.