#telling him that we should do something nice because weve only got one full day left “oh its ok ill come up to scotland in like a month”

[bogosbinted]

Ugggghhhhh this xiaohongshu thing is funny or whatever but I literally flew to London to visit my Chinese situationship for a few days and he was more interested in videos of Americans butchering mandarin than the actual real life guy that travelled down to see him

[iamtheempress]

A Vegeta x OC Fanfiction (part 3)¤ ¤ ¤

Many things ran through her mind and all she could think was, abit of excitement! Something to prove herself and show her worth, that shes not just some pretty piece to hang onto the emperor's arm, she pushes the button on the wall and the door to the Saiyan chambers and comes face to face with Nappa out of his armor. “Calamatta! Was just wondering why it took you so long to get back!” He smiled down at her and rubbed his hand over his bald scalp. 

The sliding door shut and they both walked side by side in tandem, Calamatta walked abit faster to keep pace with Nappa. “Did Vegeta tell you about the mission?” “Briefly! He didnt look too happy about it.. What gives.” She gets to her room and she sighs a bit anticipatory for this month long excursion made extermination mission.

 “Vegeta and I are to go to this one super planet… to completely wipe within a month but its just the both of us.” Nappa blinks and shakes his head Raising his eyebrow his eyebrow looking down at the small Saiyan. “Are you serious? Dont get me wrong your great at conquering planets entirely, but… what happens if you dont.” Calamatta looks away from Nappa and her tail deflates to the floor. “I...Dont know..” She answers. At the end of the day,  Saiyan or not shes terrified of what could happen, the last thing she wants is to have everything come crashing down all because of her.

Nappa stood up straight and pat her on the shoulder and startled her straight out of her stupor, grinning. “hey now! Where's that pride you had in you earlier!? Dont you get down on yourself now that your life's on the line!" She gawped at him and shook her head. "What do you-"  "What i mean is when you start facing something dire, you gotta pull your head out of your ass and charge forward!!" He bellows to her, Raditz shuffled over to her and pat her shoulder. Both of them looking down upon her. "Listen to Nappa. Hes got experience on all of us.. and you're a killer. Youll realize that when you get to To-Rot."

 Calamatta nodded and smiled hopefully for the first time in a while. Actual hope. Actual excitement! "Thank you Nappa." "AHEM" Calamatta rolled her eyes and punched Raditz in the arm. "Yea yea thank you too Raditz…" she turned and went into her room, holding her suit up she twitched and groaned. "Your fucking with me…" her tail deflated to thw floor. 

She put the suit on and goddamn did she think of herself as some kind of joke, she knows she's shapely but this is egregious. A form fitting blue bodysuit bikini type briefs and short sleeves to her elbow, the new armor covered her chest in a more shapely manner than the men. She rolled her eyes shamelessly, checked herself out in the mirror and pulled up her boots and jumped upon hearing hard pounding on the door. "Calamatta? You decent?" 

It was Vegeta

"I mean yea." The door slid open and he was focused on the holopad in his hand to  notice what she looked like "dinner is ready. Get out of your room and ……." He had to do a double take and it kinda made her sneer "its the… new suit Lord Frieza wants me to wear." He made a disgusted face and turned his head "W-whatever just come out so we can eat and you can turn in…" he turned fully and the prince blushed a tiny bit. 

Calamatta followed side by side with him and he kept with all his might to keep his eyes forward. "A-are you serious.. they made you wear th-" "yeap.. trust me it's uncomfortable to walk around in." she kept her eyes forward heading to the table with Nappa and Raditz who both simultaneously dropped their food. "Nice costume change! You can see those killer legs!" Nappa barked, bringing alittle attention to the small Saiyan and making her face red as hell. "Nappa, i'm pretty sure she wants to be wall paper at this point." Raditz kicked his shin and pushed a plate over to her. "Eat up, Cala.." she groaned.

They spent their time sitting together all eating except Cala who earned some hoots and hollers. A degrading damn get up for a saiyan who wants to be seen for more then yarm candy to the fucking emperor.. her respect for him has dindled to 0 but she has to cater to him till the 20 hours are up.. she dejectedly pushes the rest of her food away "i cant eat anymore." She sat up and realized theres a chair flush against her back "no your gonna eat.." Raditz protests as he nudges her shoulder.. a big brother figure to the little saiyan.. she felt more comfortable near him, no matter how big a jackass he is. "No damn saiyan is going hungry because of whay they have to wear." He glares at her, and smirks. 

Vegeta looks at her and leans back. "We will walk back with you to ensure you dont get any seedy looks." "Dontcha think thats pathetic" she said between bites. "Nonsense.. as the last woman of our kind you deserve alittle respect." Raditz protested, earning a curt nod from both Nappa and Vegeta.

Her mini family is small, its made up of men. But it's all she's got and she's got a hefty amount of respect for them all. 

The four walked in tandem with one another Raditz and Calamatta leading the way and Nappa and Vegeta following.

 "So does being a daughter of a general give you a leg up?" Raditz asked, tucking his hands behind his head, Calamatta walked with her hands folded in front of her, peering over at the tall long haired Saiyan. “I mean. Not entirely, same sort of treatment as everyone else here actually! Im just something pretty to gawk at while Lord Frieza does what he needs to.” Vegeta pipes up keeping his voice dead flat as he makes his point known. “If any race sees Frieza with a Saiyan at his side they’ll perceive him as a threat. Why do you think he has her within arms reach.. A warrior race reduced to a pet and something to look at is insulting but i cant necessarily blame her for not going after him.” He flippantly rolls his eyes. “I suppose your right… Calamatta is basically the next best thing to Vegeta.” “Hey now i'm not that great… i only went out once with yall.” She nudges Raditz and rolls her eyes.

The 4 were stopped in their tracks when Zarbon cut a corner and met with them, promptly making the tension between the four starkly apparent. “So apes travel in packs now? Hmhm.. Calamatta. Come. I wish to speak with you please.” The tall reptilian walked in the opposite direction of the saiyans, shoulder checking the Saiyan prince causing the vein in his forehead become more prominent, he crossed his arms and scoffed, raising his chin and moving forward. “Well go follow the vain bastard…” Vegeta growls and marches away. Calamatta turned on her heels and ran to catch up to him.

Zarbon had his hands behind his back beneath his cape, he chuckled upon seeing the short saiyan besides him. “Took you long enough, Calamatta.” “What is it you wanted to speak with me about Zarbon?” He ushers her into a room overlooking a massive planet, ripe with lush greenery and red deserts. “Thats the planet you and Vegeta are set to conquer. It has a high population density of 4 billion. What that document that Vegetas been analyzing doesnt mention the fact that the planet experiences a full moon every other day. The inhabitants will attack on sight… i should know weve sent 15 other squads before you and Vegeta.” Calamatta gawked at the planet then up to Zarbon. “Why are we just being sent then?” “I asked the same to Lord Frieza… He said he sees the prince of nothing as an excellent protege and this will prove Frieza right if one or the both of you return in one whole piece.” Calamatta looked over the two multi colored belts in the distance.. One bright white and the other red, absolutely magnificent and terrifying in retrospect. The magnitude of this entire planet was bigger then shes ever seen before. 

While she was busy being thunderstruck she was caught off guard by a weighted cloth on her shoulder. Becoming strapped to her one shoulder followed by Zarbon cooing. “Its a shame Dodoria doesn't really like your acquaintance. You'd be beautiful as a General.” It caught her off guard as he adjusted it perfectly to her armor, the end of his long velvety cape dragged haphazardly on the floor. 

“Dodoria… i never understood why he never liked me...what about you Zarbon? You have been so kind to me for years and you really don't have to be.” The green haired general tilted his head and sighed as he took two hair bands from his wrist and walked behind Calamatta and started to pull her hair back. “You're just a kid. You'll never understand the position Dodoria is in. He wants to be the general in the spotlight instead of you.” 

Calamatta remained silent and allowed him to pull her hair into two large buns on her head, he pulled any fly aways out and reviewed her facial features in the reflective window. “I honestly could give a damn one way or another but on account of why I like you is purely because you're not like the rest of your ape-ish race.. You're pretty, you have a defined face and you have a way of carrying yourself with grace and poise… the amount of times i have heard other alien councils talk about how attractive you are adds to Lord Frieza's intimidation factor..A beautiful little warrior on his arm is a display of power... So yes he prefers you much more highly then the likes of Dodoria.” He pats her shoulders and she looks back at herself. She never puts her hair up so this is something new. 

Two large pretty black buns on her head, loose fly aways of her hair make her look effortless, she could actually see her gold piercings on her ears. “You have plenty of hair so i couldnt put it all in one hair tie…” The hatch door to the side slid open, the two of them turn to see Lord Frieza seated in his chair, a small smile grew on his face as he saw Calamatta all dolled up. 

“Well WELL my little monkey is playing dress up! OHohohohooo stunning.” Calamatta goes to disrobe the cape and is promptly stopped by Zarbon. “Keep it Calamatta. It suits you. Farewell.” He turns on his heel and saunters out of the room leaving her and the Emperor in this room. She bows respectfully to him, when she raises back up Frieza is out of his chair, tail fluttering around with his arms behind his back.

Calamatta gulped while Frieza analyzed her up close; both her and the emperor are easily the same height but the Saiyan knew her place to him. Behave and dont die. “I want you to take a good look at that planet right there. Realize that you and Vegeta are my star pupil...and that being the star pupil means that one of you two simians is the best!” He preens and moves the cape to see her hands held at her front, he smirks devilishly and tilts his head.

 “That suit looks very nice on you, powerful shapely little legs for a warrior..” He raises his hand and makes a fist to emphasize the word power. Calamatta remains quiet and blushes alittle bit. “Thank you, Lord Frieza.. What exactly do you mean by the best..? I only helped out with one planet!” She stated only to be met with the steely flat stare of Frieza. 

“What im saying is that i expect you to listen to what i say, woman…” She nodded obediently and her tail droops abit. “Yes Lord Frieza sorry..-” She was cut off almost instantly “Hush now Calamatta if you know whats good for you.” He states making little calamatta bite on her lips. 

“Good.. Both of you are excellent but just so you know so you dont get a big head about it… Vegeta is the better of the two of you.. By lightyears infact.. I suspect that Zarbon told you that I plan on making Vegeta my protégé, I dont expect you to be any better than what you already are, your prince would possibly say the same of you… your untrained and unskilled in anything and i'm surprised you even came back alive and without a scratch, girl. The three other apes were to see you as useless and not want you anymore… not want you apart of their damned group.”

Calamatta looked upon Frieza disheartened, her stomach dropped to her feet and she felt like nothing, like her purpose was to be nothing more then a pretty face and nothing more, living a hollow existence. SHe felt ultimately like nothing. She twiddled her thumbs infront of her and drooped her head abit. 

“Oh now now Calamatta.. No need to look so sad.. I'm just speaking the truth to you, child… Here i know a way of earning your trust. Give me your tail.” Her head shot up and she gulped. “My-my tail?” She shivered and let her long pretty fully groomed tail come from behind her back and with trepidation she handed her most sensitive-untrained limb- to Frieza.

"You stupid little runt…" The Emperor smirked and narrowed his eyes closing his fist tightly around the tail sending Calamatta to the floor with a pained cry and a beg. “L-Let it go please! Frieza please!!” SHe begged him feeling this hot pain rocket up her back as she looked at the emperors feet through pained tears. 

Her head raised to be met with the end of Frieza’s pointer finger inches from her nose. "The prodigal prince is no where to be seen to protect you now.. oh woe is you.." The very one that death beams people without care. She panted heavily, started to sweat and tear up “W-Why I dont understa-” 

Frieza’s voice became dark and grave, she feared Frieza but this was a side of him she had never seen first hand and to be directed at her. “Your life though as entertaining as it is.. Is forfeit to me. You only serve your worth as useful until I become bored of you and when I do you will die by my hand. You will come to realize that on To-Rot your life is just as forfeit to Vegeta as it is to me… Vegeta works alone, I know him better than anyone here, Calamatta. You will discover that when your need is used up and you're on the ground begging for help… he will gladly leave you to die… tragic isn't it…? To be worthless to everyone including your own races Prince…”

 He furrowed his brow and stared her sadistically in her face and chuckled upon seeing a single tear. “I dont expect you to return after your little trip… should you return you can go with your little mates so they can ravage you.” He growled and released her tail making her tail disappear under the cape, she gasps and scrambles to her feet. “You are excused, Calamatta. Sleep well!” He turned on his lizard-like feet and left to his hoverpod. Leaving Calamatta frightened, depressed… and worthless.

She just wanted to go to bed. She just wanted to stop caring. She just wanted to feel like a Saiyan.

The day had drawn to a close and the 4 waved eachother off to wish each other a good night, Vegeta said nothing and returned to his room. The small saiyan lay down in her bed and fell asleep very quickly, a deep peaceful and relaxing sleep to ease her tense and tight muscles and weary emotional state. 

5 hours later Vegeta opened her room door and walked right in like he belonged there. the prince being deep in thought and not really in any mood to fully wake Calamatta up. He sat at the end of her bed and looked through acouple files. That being the inhabitants of To-Rot. 

An insatiably hungry and carnivorous race that wiped the original inhabitants of the planet by the guise of an infection which then grew into hunger then a form or zombified state where food is the only primary objective, while still maintaining full sentience they scour the planet for new victims to eat or to find other like minded groups and repopulate. Vegeta sneered and twitched at the sight.. both he and Calamatta wont be the first of the Frieza Force to go there, and meet an untimely demise. "Dammit.." he grunts and the female saiyan begins to stir sitting up in bed to see the spikey haired prince hunched over with his chin in his hand at the foot of rhe bed.

"Hm…? Vegeta.. what gives?" She yawned and gently kicked the princes back with her bare feet. "Read this.. brush up on what were going to face.. its not going to be easy. Especially with me doing all the heavy lifting." He growls and hands her the holo pad. "Hey.. i'm just as capable as you dont give me that crap when i just wake up, Vegeta..." "im not 'giving you crap' i'm being realistic and percautionary. The planet before hand wasn't that hard. This ones lethal and were not the firsts to go here" she pulls her tail under the covers of her blanket and rubs her eyes. Still very in a daze of sleep. "If you are tryna scare me im not scared. Well be fine and well do this planet and ill be with the 3 of yall." She reads over the holopad. 

Feeling a sense of dread and nervousness bubble up in her stomach. "Dont pass that arrogance around so easily… its not just YOUR neck on the line here its mine. And i'm not willing to die because you end up being cocky." "Can you lighten up? Your the one that came into my room and looked pretty comfy at the end of my bed." She retorts to the prince who looks mighty taken aback by the implication hes looking comfy around her.

 "Gah! Quit with your nonsensical babbling and take this seriously! Ugh.. just read that over.. ill be in my room. Ill see you in 5 hours, i need my sleep too." He goes to the door. "Vegeta, you haven't slept yet?" He stops before the button, confused as to what's with the change in tone, he turns his head and looks at her through his bangs that still hung in his face. "Please.. sleep for like.. a little longer than that. Ok? I need you as much as you need me" she asked and smiled softly, pressing her hand to her chest. 

Vegeta scoffed and blushed from nose to the tips of his ears "worry about yourself, woman… go to sleep" the begrudging prince leaves and Cala smirks. Laying back and looking at the ceiling and sighing a tear ran down her cheek and she grit her teeth hard.

“Atleast he pretends to give a damn…” Calamatta sighed wearily. CUrling in on herself and letting herself fall back into her slumber.

¤ ¤ ¤

Tags:  @memevember @dragonblobz @gonuclear @msgreenverse @fallen--lilith​ @jimbobslurpnchug​ @dragonballzforlife​ @nikabriefs​ @lilhemmo​ @lizardhipsdontlie​ @hierophantblue​ @supremeleadershitlord​ @thotful-writing​ @chickiedinner​ @anti-jaina @dragonball-hcs-or-sum-shit

[siserary933043]

Caravan of love

God I need a cigarette! I gasped as I collapsed, exhausted, at the top of the small mountain my team had just hiked up in the Lake District.

Youre supposed to be setting us a good example. Khalid laughed as he flopped down next to me quickly followed by his two schoolmates.

Fu…To Hell with that! I laughed, I deserve one after a walk like that.

Still laughing at me puffing and panting the boys whispered something, then Khalid turned to me and asked nervously; Do you really want a smoke?

I was supposed to have given up…but…yes… at this minute I would absolutely love one. I replied.

Jonny, he turned to his friend, give her one.

Id love to; but will a fag do? The good looking teenager giggled.

When the penny dropped that Khalid had made an innuendo the laughter got even louder.

You boys will get me the sack! I chided them as I took the cigarette from the packet. Jonny knelt beside me as he lit it in his best James Bond manner.

Youre leaving anyway, the other boy, Fletcher, corrected me.

He was correct; this was my last day as a teacher in the UK and I was only doing this course as a favour to the Headmaster.

Im Nina and Im a 25yr old supply teacher in the North of England. Because I was sick of not knowing which school Id be at from one week to the next I was catching a train home to Bishop Stortford the next afternoon after Id safely put my three teenage charges on the coach home to Newcastle. Id been at this school 7 times in the last three years and had developed a good reputation among the pupils and staff, but knew that there was no chance that Id ever get a full-time job.

Every year twelve schools from the Newcastle area take part in an outward bound competition in the Lake District spread over four days. The Headmaster at Ponteland Comprehensive, where Id been teaching since January, was desperate for his school to do well for once; but Mr. Winnet who was meant to be in charge of a team of four had hurt his back so I was corralled into spending four days climbing hills, canoeing, orienteering and walking through rivers with three hormonally challenged 15 year olds while getting paid for it!

I already knew the three boys in the team from my time as their stand-in Maths teacher and hadnt had any real problems with them; even though they were all from the notorious Darras Hall Estate. These three were regarded as ‘saveable by the Headmaster and the course was their reward for 100% attendance and working hard.

Im a naturally sporty type of girl; so with my help and leadership we had been ‘neck and neck with Scotswood Grammar School and climbing this hill in the fastest time meant that we were the Champions!

Youd better finish that quick, miss! Jonny shouted, Walker Academy is nearly here.

Khalid and I took a last puff from our cigarettes and made a drama out of stubbing them out and wafting away the tell-tale smell of smoke, although there was a gale nearly blowing us away.

I grinned and shook my head when I read the sticker on the boys caravan door – ‘If the caravans a-rockin; dont come aknockin! Hardly appropriate for a group of schoolboys; I thought.

Whats going on here? I asked as I suspiciously sniffed the air in their caravan when I went to collect them to go to the evening meal and presentation.

Nothing, Miss. They all chimed in unison.

If thats what I think it is, you really will get me sacked. I tried not to grin as I definitely smelt dope in the air.

The boys didnt admit to anything and we made our way across the muddy field to the main building. It was quite a distance as we had been allocated two caravans at the far end of a large field; the other schools had large tents closer to the main building and toilet block.

You look nice miss. Khalid told me as we walked past the other schools tents.

Thank you, I smiled in appreciation, a girl never knows what her luck will be like in a place like this.

I did actually; even though I was wearing a nice short denim skirt and a fitted zip-up hooded top there was absolutely no way I was going to pull on my last night as an English school teacher. The best looking guy was obviously gay and the other teachers and the instructors all looked down their noses at my team as they were from a rough council estate that didnt fit into their ‘elite club.

After dinner and the short ceremony we tried to mingle with some of the other teams but when I had to stop Jonny from hitting a taller boy from Scotswood I thought that a tactical retreat was called for.

Have you got any of that stuff left that I didnt smell earlier? I asked Khalid as I pinned Jonny to the wall as a teacher from Jesmond led a whimpering boy away claiming that Jonny was ‘going to kill him.

He nervously looked at Jonny who was their natural leader; then nodded nervously, Why Miss?

I think that this young man needs to relax and, if memory serves me right, that should do the trick!

Youre cool, Miss, Fletcher told me, with a lop-sided grin, for a teacher!

I asked what he meant by that and the boys all told me why they liked me above all of the other teachers as we wandered back to their caravan.

The boys were being trusted not to wreck the van as they should have been chaperoned by Mr Winnet but he had got the train home earlier in the day.

As Khalid unlocked the door he turned and grinned, Weve got some booze too!

Why am I not surprised? I chuckled as I took a seat in the middle of the bay window.

Khalid brought his large rucksack in from the bedroom as Jonny produced a tin with 5 spliffs in it from his.

I shook my head in mild disbelief as they poured large measures of vodka into tumblers and topped it up with coke from the ceremony.

Where did this come from? I asked as I put the glass to my lips, I know you didnt bring it with you; we checked your bags.

This morning; when you were putting Winnet on the train, he grinned mischievously, I robbed two bottles and some cider out of the shop over the road.

The boys let out a cheer as I shook my head in mock disbelief.

Jonny opened his tin and offered me one of the spliffs.

Id rather have a ciggie if someone has one. I shrugged my shoulders, Ill have one of those later!

As we sipped the vodka and coke the boys bombarded me with questions: ‘Did I have a boyfriend? ‘Why was I leaving? ‘What was my home town like? ‘What was university like? ‘Had I ever taken drugs? ‘Did I have any tattoos or piercings?

It was fun talking to them and I tried to be as honest as possible as they genuinely wanted to know what life was like away from their town. I admitted to smoking dope and occasionally dropping a couple of Es and I had three tattoos; showing them the Angel on my shoulder and the Celtic design on my lower back but letting them guess where the other one was.

When Id finished my large glass of vodka and coke we all lit up the spliffs…WOW…Id forgotten how good that stuff could be and how powerful.

My head was spinning when Fletcher handed me a second large glass of vodka.

My legs were now curled underneath and I began asking about their lives. It wasnt long before they started talking about girls.

As the drink and dope began to take effect we were all in a giggly mood and the boys became braver as they talked about the girls and other female teachers in very personal terms.

I began by admitting to being quite wild at University but not actually telling them exactly what Id done – just letting them guess; which was fun.

The boys quickly became excited when I didnt blush or rein them in so their questions soon became very sexy and personal.

‘Did I play with myself? ‘Did I use sex toys? ‘Had I ever been with another girl? ‘Had I ever seen a porn film? ‘Do you suck cock, Miss?

Without hesitating I replied, Yes or of course, to just about everything.

The boys were all grinning and had twinkles in their eyes as they continued asking me about my sex life and confessed to all sorts of things that theyd been getting up to with the girls at school who Id previously thought relatively innocent! How wrong I was!

Jonny told me that Nadia gave the best blow-jobs because her tongue was pierced but Carly would let them cum on her face.

Apparently at least five girls in 5c, including both Thompson twins, had shaved their pubes off! I couldnt remember if I even had pubes at that age!

Their dirty language and descriptions were now making me very, very horny and I was beginning to think I should leave them as I really needed to frig myself.

What do girls think about when they play with themselves? Fletcher asked.

All sorts, I guess. I answered then took a draw on the last spliff that Khalid had passed to me.

Like fantasies? he continued.

Yes, I raised my eyebrows in mock amazement, girls have sexy fantasies just like guys.

All three looked genuinely amazed and it was only then that I remembered how young and immature they really were.

So what are your fantasies Miss? Jonny asked me.

Ooh, I couldnt possibly say. I said as coyly as possible.

I nearly gave the game away when Khalid immediately started talking about him and his elder brother roasting a girl as her 15th birthday present.

By this time I was permanently squirming in my seat and I was sure that Jonny and Khalid were looking up my skirt and could see my red panties. They certainly made no attempt to hide their bulges that where poking through their jogging pants as they moved into the corner of the sofa for a clearer look.

.

Im going to have to go for a wank now! Jonny snorted as he thrust his hands inside his pants and finally adjusted his hard dick. I uncurled my legs to make myself more comfortable; making sure that they got an unobstructed flash of my soaking knickers and hopefully some of my gash as I knew my pussy would be sucking the gusset in.

Would you like me to do that for you? I smiled.

The poor kid didnt know what to do or say.

Im serious, I beamed, as I took another slurp of vodka, do you want me to wank you off?

The boys nervously looked at each other, unable to comprehend what Id just said.

I manoeuvred until I was kneeling on the sofa and facing the 15 year old schoolboys.

Oh come on guys, I pleaded as I slowly unzipped my top, youve got to know how horny youve made me.

The boys were still silent but now grinning madly.

Ill show you mine if youll show me yours. I giggled as I took my top off then seductively cupped and stroked my tits through my pale blue lacy Wonderbra.

Ive always had nice tits…no thats not quite right…I have fucking lovely tits…everyone says so! They are medium sized (32b), firm and pliable clay and my nipples poke up to the sky. They have passed ‘the pencil test several times!

Jonny shrugged his shoulders and pulled the waistband of his pants down with one hand and waved his prick at me with the other.

Mmmm, that looks nice. I purred as I unhooked my bra and let it fall to the caravan floor. Do you like my tits?

The boys nervously nodded. Jonny and Khalid were still in front of me but Fletcher was sitting slightly behind getting a good view of my arse as well as a side view of my tits.

Get your cocks out and Ill show you my tattoo! I teased as I unbuttoned the side of my skirt.

Khalid quickly whipped his out closely followed by Fletcher. Their cocks looked gorgeous; Khalids was about 6 inches long and quite thick and a lot darker than his olive skin – I couldnt wait to suck it! Jonnys was about the same length but not as fat and Fletchers was short and fat – just like him.

I could feel the sweat running down my back as I stood up and let my skirt fall to the floor. The boys couldnt take their eyes off me as I slowly pulled the front of my knickers down so that they could see my hairy pie and my little red devil tattoo but not quite everything.

I dropped my chin onto my chest, fluttered my eyelashes as innocently as possible and told them, Well, Ive seen yours…would you like to see mine?

Fuck yes! Fletcher gasped as he stroked his cock. Actually they were all slowly masturbating in a well practiced manner. Thats another thing about me…I love watching guys play with themselves…as long as there is some left for me.

It took a tug to prize my knickers out of my sticky pussy but Khalids jaw nearly hit the floor when he saw the long string of juice that was stuck to the gusset!

I slowly looked around the caravan at my three students. They were like putty in my hands as they devoured my naked body with their eyes – they were going to be my sexual play-things for the rest of the night.

Do you still want me to …wank you off? I suggestively licked my lips and met Jonnys gaze, or would you like me suck it?

Ooh, Miss…suck me off…PLEASE MISS! Jonny pleaded.

I rested my knee on the seat and leant forward, jiggling my tits for him when I gently wrapped my fingers around his hot pink shaft. Perhaps it was stage-fright but it wasnt as hard now as when he had first flashed it at me; but I would soon put that right.

Does that feel good? I asked. The boy grinned and nodded. Lets see if the Teachers better at sucking cocks than her pupils?

Ahughaghaghooohhh. He groaned when I covered his swollen plum and kept on pushing until his squishy cock filled my mouth and my chin touched his hairy bollocks.

God his young cock tasted lovely…all hot and sweaty just how I like them. Years of practice came in useful as I began fucking his cock with my mouth as I breathed through my nose. Just as I hoped it instantly began to stiffen and filled my mouth so I had to eventually let most of it glide out so I could suck him comfortably and stroke his shaft and balls.

My head was spinning as I put on a show for his friends; slurping and sucking his dick like a porn actress.

Squeeze my tits! I whispered in between slurps.

Jonny slid his hand around my neck and began caressing my breast; making me gasp when he touched the nipple.

Squeeze them harder! I pleaded, Dig your fingers into my tits!

Oh fuck! he gasped but obeyed, digging his nails into my flesh and shaking my puppies like a kitten with a ball of wool.

When I felt his balls tighten and his breathing became shallower I tightly gripped the base of his shaft and making sure my breath engulfed his knob I looked up into his glazed eyes.

Miss! Im cumming! He warned me, MISS! My balls are aching…Im cumming!

Do you want to cum on the Teachers face? I teased Youd like that wouldnt you? Spunking all over her face!

Yes, yes, yes! He winced and manically nodded his head as I flicked my tongue across his japs-eye.

Go on then, I whispered as I furiously rubbed his shaft and aimed his piss-hole at my face.

I too was now squealing with delight as he tried to pull my nipple out of its roots when the first jet of hot teenage spunk splashed across my face, then another and the third landed in my eye.

Oh God! Oh fucking God…Miss! He gasped as I sucked the last dregs of salty spunk out of his cock.

Delirious with desire I raised myself up onto my feet. As his spunk dripped down my face I asked, Who wants to be next?

Me Miss! Me Miss! Fletcher shouted as he raised his arm in the air for attention, forgetting that he wasnt in class.

I picked my knickers off the floor and wiped the excess cum off my face then lay down next to him with my face in his lap.

His short stubby cock looked lovely as I licked some bitter pre-cum out of his tip.

As I stroked his cock I turned to the other two, I need one of you to lick my cunt.

They both looked shocked that Id used the C word. It hadnt dawned on me that the boys and I had probably used every other word in the dictionary during our sexy chat but at this moment in time it wasnt a vagina or a pussy between my legs it was a CUNT a hot and horny CUNT that needed a good tonguing.

Jonny instantly knelt on the floor and pulled my legs apart; staring at my hot pink gash.

Ive never done this before, Miss. What do I do? He looked at me excitedly.

Just lick it like its an ice cream then, I told him as I pulled the sticky flaps apart to expose my clitoris which was sticking out like a third nipple, then flick your tongue like crazy over that.

Ill try my best miss. He said in a soft voice. Even the boys calling me ‘Miss was becoming such a fucking turn-on!

Oooooohhhhh yeesssss! I moaned when he made his tongue glide up my groove.

He was a fucking natural; his untrained tongue lapped up my love juices and he sucked on my labia as his fingers stroked and caressed the inside of my thighs and the crack of my arse.

After a minute or so I bent over to greedily eat Fletchers fat prick. We moaned and groaned in unison as his cock fit perfectly into my mouth and Jonnys tongue fit perfectly into my sopping cunt.

Yeh….yeh…yeh…yeh! Fletcher kept gasping as he twirled my around his fingers as my mouth created a vacuum around his dick.

Without using words I made him spread his legs so I could get a tight grip on his hairless sack while I bobbed my head and swirled my tongue around the purple knob.

Oohya! I yelped when Jonnys tongue suddenly touched my clit making me jump and I let the cock slip out of my mouth.

YES….YES…YES! I cried out, Finger me! Finger me!

Jonny dutifully poked my twat with a long middle finger giving me a little bit of relief as I returned to my oral administrations on his fat friend.

Fletcher grabbed two handfuls of hair and began bouncing in his seat as he fucked my mouth. I met each thrust with a bob of my head as Jonny did wonderful things to my cunt and clit with his fingers and tongue.

My whole body seemed to convulse as I gave and received oral at both ends.

Aaaaaggghhh! Fletcher gasped as he neared orgasm.

More fingers! I shouted to Jonny as my own fingers furiously wanked the fat cock until it showered my face with thick lumpy spunk.

He inserted a second then a third finger and viciously licked my throbbing clit until I panted for air then WOW!!!! A mind blowing orgasm flooded my body. I didnt scream or cry out like I usually do…I just grinned myself silly as the sweetest feeling in the world engulfed my whole being as Fletcher covered my lips with solid globules of sticky cum.

My orgasm left me shattered so I flopped back against the cushions and gently stroked my tingling cunt for their amusement.

Khalid was now standing naked in the middle of the floor stroking a stiffy that looked like it was going to burst.

Come here baby, I whispered and patted the cushion nearest my head, and Teacher will take care of that ache for you!

He didnt need telling twice and was soon waving his dark uncut cock in front of my face. I couldnt wait either and immediately filled my mouth with my third rock hard teenage cock.

My tits…my tits! I moaned, Do what Jonny did and squeeze Teachers titties for her…nice and hard…hurt me!

His hairy olive fingers were soon mauling my mounds as I sucked his dark pipe for him.

Oh yes…thats good! I grunted with a mouth full of cock as he stretched my pink rosebud nipples as far as they would go, making me suck the life out of his young dong.

As the third boy to get his cock sucked I knew that he wouldnt last as long as the others and I was right. Khalid soon grabbed my head and forced his long thin dick past my tonsils and came straight into the back of my throat and down my neck.

I was now insatiable and judging by the three hard cocks that were in front of me so were they!

Now… fuck me! I called to Jonny as I lay flat on my back and spread my legs for my young lover, curling one ankle over the back cushion so that my hairy cunt was on show to the whole world.

With a huge grin on his face he knelt between my splayed legs and eagerly guided his six inches of throbbing cock into my willing hole.

Ooohhh yes baby! I panted as his cock filled me up, does that feel good fucking your teacher?

Yes Miss it does, he chuckled as he began thrusting his hips and forcing his cock into my belly, Its fucking…fucking amazing!

My head was shaking from side to side and I was playing with my over sensitive tits as Jonny proved to me that he hadnt been lying about fucking lots of girls at his tender age…he was quite a swordsman.

Fuck her mouth, Jonny told the others, one of you fuck her mouth…lets roast her!

The smile on my face would have lit up London when Khalid suddenly appeared next to my face and forced his cock past my lips for a second time.

I was in raptures as Jonny forced my legs back until my knees touched my tits making his long thick cock tickle the inside of my belly and the darker boy grasped two large handfuls of my mousey brown hair as he wildly fucked my mouth and throat. All I had to do was lie back and enjoy it as they now treat me as their sexual plaything for nearly fifteen minutes.

Jonny hadnt cum and sweat was pouring from his face when Fletcher begged him ‘for a go!

Okay, he panted, but Im not finished with her.He had hardly pulled his cock out when Fletcher lunged forward.

Wait! I gasped as I pushed Khalid away from my face, let me get on top…I want to cum again.

I positioned Fletcher so he was sitting on the sofa and I straddled him. His thick cock felt wonderful as it stretched my aching cunt. I quickly accustomed myself to his girth and rocked backwards and forward rubbing my clit against his pubic bone as I squashed my tits against his face.

The other two wandered off and opened the bottle of cider as I fucked their fat friend within an inch of his life!

No matter what I did to him; I couldnt cum. I bounced on his cock, I ground down hard, I twisted and rotated, I fucked him fast and I fucked him slow – nothing! I kept getting close but nothing.

I was becoming desperate when I spotted Jonny and Khalid whispering conspiratorially; then giggling like the teenagers that they were.

Jonny stood on the sofa and edged towards me waving his flaccid cock in front of my face. I didnt need asking twice and hungrily gobbled his young meat as I bounced on the fat cock in my cunt.

Id been with two guys at University once and had dreamt of doing it again; never dreaming that it would be with school kids; but tonight it seemed so much sexier and dirtier than in my fantasies; especially because they called it ‘spit-roasting.

If fucking and sucking two cocks was exciting Khalid soon moved the action up a gear!

As I ground my pussy down onto Fletchers cock Khalid began shaking my tits with one hand and stroking and nipping my arse with his other.

Go on. Jonny urged him as he held my head while I sucked and licked his rock hard shaft.

Khalid nervously ran a finger between my arse cheeks and hovered a finger tip over my anus as he rolled my nipple between his fingers then tugged on it just the way I liked.

Go on! Jonny was becoming agitated, Shes not stopping you, is she?

Without any warning he jabbed a bony finger past my sphincter and about in inch or more slid inside my arse making me gasp…with pleasure!

Ugh…ugh…good. I gurgled.

I fucking told you she would like it! Jonny admonished his young friend. Khalid soon realised that I was enjoying having his finger up my arse while the other two ‘roasted me he soon began twisting my nipples and finger fucking my arse with two fingers.

Fletcher broke off from suckling my tit to ask; have you ever been water-tight Miss?

What? I asked as Jonny sat on the top of the cushion watching the action.

Airtight you dozy cunt! The good looking boy laughed, Airtight!

I shook my head and raised my eyebrows to let him know I still didnt know what he meant.

There was a look of surprise then delight on his face as he told me; you take three cocks at once…one in each hole.

Id never heard of such a thing but the crazy grin on my face must have told him that I wanted to try it…NOW!

Right…get up bollocks face, Jonny said as he slapped Fletcher on the shoulder, lets change places.

We took a moment or two to decide who was going where and which would be the most comfortable way to perform this lewd sexual act.

As I gulped down a belly full of cool cider, we agreed that I would fuck Jonny, suck Fletcher and because he had the thinnest cock; Khalid would be the first to fuck my arse!

I was shaking with excitement as I fed Jonnys 6 inches into my well fucked cunt. When I was comfortable Khalid lined the tip of his dick against my puckered anus and spit a gobful of saliva between my cheeks as lubrication. I clung onto Jonny as Khalid slowly worked his cock into my virgin arse-hole.

Agh…ugh…ooh! I grunted through gritted teeth as my arse felt as if it was being torn in two.

Oh shit! The boys gasped in unison.

I can feel your fucking dick touching mine! Jonny giggled as only a thin membrane separated to hard cocks inside my body.

After making sure that the boys wouldnt budge I slowly rotated my hips and gently moved my arse so that their cocks moved a little bit as I became acclimatised to the feeling of being full beyond belief.

Okay, I nervously told them, but be gentle with me.

Thankfully Jonnys position meant that he couldnt be as forceful as he would have liked to be and my arsehole was too tight for Khalid to fuck too fast so I was soon nearly hallucinating with sexual elation.

After a couple of minutes I began to relax and the three of us began moving with a bit more freedom making me groan and moan and gasp and giggle with gratification.

Now…now! I gasped and nodded to Fletcher, Im ready…make me airtight!

Fletcher shuffled along the sofa and placed his purple knob on my bottom lip. I nodded my head and his fat cock stretched my mouth and jaw.

I snorted and gagged but I wasnt going to stop now! I could feel my poop-chute stretch and loosen up with every thrust from Khalid and the more relaxed I became the harder Jonny banged his cock into my cunt from down below.

Fireworks were soon going off in my head and clitoris as I began spontaneously orgasming. Little ones, big ones, short ones long ones…one after another untilI was just hanging on to the boys…like a limp rag.

Yes…yes…YES! Khalid wheezed as he rammed his dick into my arse like a fucking piston then suddenly stopped as he filled my shit-hole with his cream. His cock came out of my arse a lot easier than it went in!

Get off me! Jonny demanded as soon as the other boy stepped away. I want to fuck

your arse.

He virtually pushed me away in his haste to bugger me. As soon as he was standing behind me he forced me back onto my knees and spread my cheeks to view his friends handiwork.

Oh man, he exhaled noisily, that looks so fucking sweet…look… your spunks still coming out!

I was now trembling with anticipation as Jonny tentatively nudged his fat cockhead against my tingling anus. Khalid had stretched my poop-chute but Jonnys cock was definitely fatter and it still wasnt that easy for him to get his knob past my sphincter.

Aaaaahhhgggggg! I howled as he finally plunged his dick into my arse. As soon as the knob entered the rest just slid in like greased lightening. AaaaaaAAAGGGGHHHHHH you bastard! I screamed again when he began fucking my arse as hard as he had my cunt, but it didnt stop him.

I was biting my lip and had my face buried into a cushion to stifle the pain as he pummelled my arse with his thick six inches. The pain was becoming unbearable and electrifying so I didnt want him to stop.

Oh Jonny, Jonny, Jonny!I cried with tears of joy running down my face, Harder baby…harder…fuck my arse…fuck the teachers arse!

The teenager was now grunting like a wild animal as he revelled in the discomfort he was causing me.

Thats it…yes…yes…yes! he groaned as he speeded up just before he too filled my anal cavity with lovely teenage spunk.

When he withdrew his cock I could feel my hole gaping open and the overflowing spunk running down my thighs.

Its your turn now. Jonny wheezed and pushed Fletcher with the extra wide cock forward.

My arse was already stinging from the two buggerings Id just had but when Fletch pushed his fat mushroom in I gasped and felt like Id died and gone to Heaven. This boy was in no hurry and fucked my arse very slowly – each stroke nearly turning it inside out.

Oh baby, baby, I whined, that feels so fucking good. Youre making Teachers arse very, very sore and I fucking love it!

As the other two boys sat in front of me taking it in turns to feed their cocks into my mouth I panted, Thats it…faster…faster…fill my arse with your hot spunk…go on do it!

Hearing my husky voice sent him over the top and I felt my arse get warmer as he filled it with hot spunk.

Over the next hour or so the boys fucked me in every combination imaginable.

When I eventually collapsed, exhausted on the floor, my arse had been fucked ragged and my cunt was nearly worn out and my jaw was aching so much I could hardly speak; but I didnt care…this was the fucking of a fucking lifetime.

Id heard about the staying power of young boys but…shit… these boys were out of this fucking world.

I could hardly move the next morning when I woke up in a sleeping bag next to Jonny. I pulled on my top and skirt and hobbled to the shower block like John Wayne after a 200 mile horse ride.

I stood shivering with aches and pains under the hot shower; hardly able to wash myself as I relived the previous evenings events over and over and over again in my head.Pangs of guilt struck me as I got dressed in my tiny caravan but I reminded myself that the boys had promised to keep what we did a secret (hardly likely – I know) and after all in five days I would be on the other side of the world starting a new life in New Zealand.

https://www.superbestaudiofriends.org/index.php?members/olevridis.10679/#info

[ain-t-bovvered]

14x10 Commentary

Zeta and Giuls scream together, and then die.

Me & Zeta will watch together season 14′s episodes as they come out and we’ll do our commentary while watching.

1 2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9

14x10 Nihilism 

-I did not want to see Jack like that again thanks

Zeta: true

- And there was a need for some wings there honestly .

[ comes back crawling]

HERE

Zeta:  the bar sceeeene

-.....THAT’S A DAMN SQUIRREL WITH A AVIATOR CAP ON ( also I re wrote squirrel four times before getting it right) 

- MOOSE!!! 

-......The Moose has a tag with “FAMILY BUSINESS” written on it----lol Jensen

Zeta: What’s her name

- PAMELAAAAAAAA . Damn woman I went a bit Bi there

Zeta: OH YES.

- [Music: and I’m searching for a rainbow] .....WOW

-[on the counter] Daphne loves Fred.

 my monkey dirty brain: Daddy loves tips. 

-hot. want that.

Zeta: the tequila or the bartender?

Bitch please . both.

- D: “ What are we, savages?”

Zeta: Oh the lips

-Cosmic Cowboy. *chokes*

-FB

-why is it always a ghoul case?

-Lol but who’s the drunk guy tho

Zeta: Bitch, look at her biceps

- some Bi slippage there too I see. FOCUS

Zeta: also indeed. Who is he?

-D:”I’ve never had anything this nice”

Also....I would be like Dean if I had a bar. One for the costumer and one for me! woohoo .

- D: “How come you always have a boyfriend?”

  P: “How come you always want what you can’t have?”

[looks into the camera like in the office]

- D: “This is my dream” 

I kinda see it tho....old grumpy Dean Winchester being the Bobby while running a bar like that. Yes....I like it.

- I knew it . I wanna see someone closed behind that “closet” *wink wink*

Zeta: Oh oh

Zeta: the slo mo.

-NICE .You are welcome for this gif where I let you enjoy the full over the count jump. Nice healthy middle age man over the fence jump ( nevermind this is an italian oil ad ).

-The blood. So cute

Zeta: I’m famous

- mmm

Zeta: shit

-Hello M boi, I missed you fam

Zeta: Changed clothes

- OMFG are you saying that the Archangel Michael macVanity von DramaQueen really just angel mojo changed into his Peaky Blinder wanna be in front of them?

He’s so flamboyant , I love him .

Zeta: The close up

- M making three men kneel with so much as lift his hands.  WHAT A MOOD. WHERE CAN I GET THAT? I WANT 10.

- M : “ I saw everything”  Yeah no shit we kinda see that coming too

-DoN ‘T IntERrUPt mE 

Zeta: Don’t interrupt me

-I’m-

I’m so bothered right now. Dom Michael for the win

-OH WOW

- Sam just “assbutted” Michael lol.

Castiel : Sam....did you just molotov my brother with holy fire?

Sam: uh ....No?

- HE ANGRY

- Dean’s not home right now...

Zeta: Please leave a message

*giggling* I love him

Zeta: His voice GOD DAMN

-yes

- Castiel hair tho.

Zeta: Do you? Cocky much

-but needs to play it cool. Can’t risk to mess up the pomaded hair.

- S:” We the angel cuffs on , Michael is under control”

 M: “Keep telling yourself that “  ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

I *clap* LOVE *clap* HIM *clap*

- S: “Dump him in the trunk of the Impala” ... DUMP HIM .ahahahahaah

-Garth is in the trunk

Zeta: it’s a big trunk

-M: “ It’s a party!”

- J: “ It’s not like any of us can fly”

 M : “ Well one of us can”

 S: “ STFU”

- J:” Sam, are we gonna die here?” ... wow Jack...babe...stfu

-Yes OMG I forgot about the stalky reaper

Zeta: You mess up so many things

- it ain’t wrong

- [in john Mulaney’s Trump voice] we locked Death away and enslaved the reapers

Zeta: Poor Cas

- ok but WHO....death? Michael is asking himself that too.

-Yes , put him in the dungeon. HOT

Zeta: shit

-I can hear you

Zeta: Shit

-Ahahahahahaahah

Zeta: SHIT

-I’m loving this

Zeta: Bring back Crowley.

Zeta: We left Garth in the trunk looool

- that....everytime we don’t see a character for long that’s it...they are in the trunk.

Zeta: Castiel

-CASTIEL . so strange, I love him, he’s such a sarcastic asshole.

- M: “Yes, uh, put a chair against the door”

Zeta: This pretty smile as I rip you apart

-I’M SHAKING. YAS.

Zeta: Control yourself

- S: “Cass this is all we’ve got”

Zeta: Again?

- well it is a loop.

-MORE SHOTS.  (me)

Zeta: The only thing missing is “heat of the moment”

- what if the woman is his conscience trying to get him out and if he sign he’s out? ...like....testing his resolution?

-Little insulting

Zeta: you’re nothing

Zeta: Why is he so perfect in this?

- J: “Dean---is strong”

  M *disgusted face*: “ Is a gnat “ . WOW

-OH SHUT UP OOOOH

Zeta: Emotional abuse.

- M: “ he was not happy, but he didn’t care-- Cause you are not Sam, you are not Cass.” 

[ me looking smiling to the Castiel/Misha hateclub]

-M: “You are a weak helpless thing”

- Jack , babe ....get away tho 

Zeta: LISTEN TO YOUR DAD

- M: “no I’m not and I can still hear you”

Zeta: Prick

- Love that prick..... literally 

- I care so little for the others I swear

- M: “Look at you, play nursemaind for a nephilim”

-C: “You are confusing loyalty and compassion for weakness”

Zeta: Damn what am I watching?

- [looks into the camera like in the office] Sexual tension

Zeta: so done. this. Close up

- M “and now...that I’m in here, I know why” 

-CHUCK

Zeta: He churn our draft after draft

- M speaks like he’s singing and mocking you at the same time. He has this musicality in his speak and I love it

- C: “Why would he do that?”

 M: “BECAUSE HE DOESN’T CARE!”

- good lord I swear all the angels are just brats throwing temper tantrum because they have a trash dad.

- M: “But now , I just want to burn every one of his little worlds until I catch up to the Old man”

Zeta: Even god can die.

- oh ok....overachiever much

Zeta: Hurt Jack

- No no Jack babe...keep your fucking soul .

Zeta: Cool science project

- Michael’s mind: if you mess up my perfectly combed hair Cass I swear-

- M: “ I give it a solid B- .....uh oooh”

 me nervously: .....wtf lol 

- M: *snorts* Oh Cass, I believe in you.

So rude...so nasty 

- j: “ What should I do?”

Zeta: Pray

-Thanks Cas, that’s-......that’s great

Zeta: You are all mine

- ..... YESSIR TAKE ME

Zeta: Dean’s mind.

- ..... if it was a funny episode they could have made so many jokes about being empty lol.

- me looking around haters mind ^

Zeta: This is what you are gonna become

-omg

- THAT WAS DEAN IN HELL.

- Dean’ “NOOOO “ at Castiel death is vibrating into my bones.

- S: “Dean is strong”

- C: “Sam, we’ve been through a lot and Dean is more than strong”

- S: “Dean thrive on trauma.” 

WE’VE BEEN KNEW

Zeta: Smart moose

- Somebody has been reading some meta tumblr posts

- P: “You really know how to talk to a lady don’t you?”

 me already at Castiel’s feet : wha

- That’s us fans watching 14 seasons of supernatural ^

-Bloody Cass is 100. *licks lips*

- P: “get me a shot. With your braaaain”

Zeta: Well hello.

- C:” That was- that....DeAN ThAt WaS An ACcidENT”

Zeta: Babyyyy

- them baby faces

- C:” WE NEED YOU TO COME BACK”

- S:”POUGHKEEPSIE”

- Dean’s mind : [ old modem sounds]

-M [Slow clap it out.] : Hey Fellas

-AND THE HAT IS BACK

Zeta: I’m you

Zeta: He gripped you tight and raised you from perdition

-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH I’M DYING SO BAD.

-BITCH I’M DEAD AND GIGGLING I CAN’T.

-but also....but the fuck is Mary at?... like wow.

- also....everything that Micheal is saying right now is causing me actual fucking pain.

- Ok and both Sam and Cas faces? well thanks

Zeta: He’s buying time

-WOW. Slow smile, oooooH

-S: “So in here, you are all talk”

- oh that’s why he doesn’t use his powers. Serviceable .

Zeta: So happy. Fuck

Zeta: Prove it

- Um...yes hello 911? 

Michael getting his hands dirty is too hot for me.

-Fucking Tiger man.

-Come on baby 

Zeta: Jack will do something “stupid”

- Well he is his parents’ son *shrug*

Zeta: that

- D:” Then we don’t kick him out, we keep him in”

-oooooh M goes in the closet, lol

Zeta: Oh my god.

- ....Well that was stupid AHAHAHAAH 

- I can’t stop laughing .

- M [ROAR] 

  me: ....

Zeta: I’m the cage.

-HE IS THE CAGE. That doesn’t seem right tho...come on.

Zeta: So now Dean has Michael locked up

-ooooh the magic hurt him. Forgot about that. My baby.

Zeta: Concerned Dad.

- The way Cass say : “you understand?” killed me....so soft...so worried...

- The little smile! Kill me now.

Zeta: He’s not ok.

-Dean is not ok.

Zeta: [henley alert]

-He’s like....naked. ( still has another tshirt under it tho)

-Oh he’s mad 

- I’M CRYING . HE LOOKS LIKE MY CAT WHEN I REFUSE TO LET HIM OUT .

amazing.

( Sorry for the not that clear gifs but I wanted to cut and past all the bits of that because it’s amazing)

Zeta: He’s suffering so much.

-That troat

- That door is not that sturdy tho

Zeta: Oh hell no

- oh hello death . 

-Aw hell naw.

- Death :” Except one”

-AW HELL NAW

Zeta: Which one?

- UGH

Zeta: No

-NO

Zeta: NOOO so much hurt

-OH FUCK

Zeta: Actual literal pain in my chest

YA KNOW WHAT?....I DON’T LIKE THAT LOOK .

NOT ONE BIT.

.

- lol I don’t even wanna look at tumblr now

Zeta: well you know me....I have

- of course you did

post gifs comment: I didn’t do my crack gifs for now, but they will be done in a separate post.

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If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @supernatural-teamfreewillpage  @destiel-honeypie   @mariekoukie6661   @dragontamerm    @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat   @bunnybaby121115  @aliaitee @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc

[xo-dailypier-blog]

[Post 1 of 3]

Wow! What a week. Summer Crush truly took the life of me, and the way some of these hook ups went, it took the life out of you too. 

Instead of giving everyone an entire rundown of the day-by-day events, I took it upon myself to collect the top ten moments that I felt really stood out to ME, The Daily Pier!

TEN.

I should probably start this countdown off with the Noah/Diana/Natasha triangle going on that none of them know that they are a part of. It’s the most heartwarming thing to happen during this event and I LOVE it! Ok, so just to catch you all up to speed, #SinCarter were married once upon a slay. They eloped when they were off being WAR CRIMINALS for the USA or whatever. So once Natasha began to explore her latent homosexuality that she had repressed all these years the two came to the mutual agreement to just divorce. (Also, her sister was dealing with like, a meth addiction, or something, so that probably didn’t help the relationship). So fast forward 10 years and here they are in the same town with TONS of baggage, and unfinished business.

BUT WAIT a new challenger approaches in Diana Taylor. Noah and Diana have been getting pretty close these past view months. Some people have even said that he’s the rebound to that Daniel guy she was dating. I mean, after MONTHS of heavy petting and will they/won’t they, after their Summer Crush date, rumor has it that the two went back to Noah’s place and … well … *fellatio noises*. Obvs this can’t get out because Diana is in the public eye, so don’t tell anyone.

With a new woman in his life, and the old one present with a lot of shit to work out with him, this new season of the Aryan Chronicles looks promising!

As for who I ship? Well, I want to say #SinCarter because the mutual feelings of their past came back full force during this event. And I still ship Olivia/Diana and Diana/Wes. Neither of which will happen because 1.)Diana and Olivia are “”””””straight”””””””” and 2.)Ever since Diana RANDOMLY left New York she’s been keeping everyone at arms length, especially Wes. Who has too much love to give, and doesn’t deserve that. Who’s to say she won’t do the same to Noah?

I’m watching you Diana (if that is your real name).

NINE.

Q: Rexless_Fan asked “Victor and June hooked up in a fantasy suite and they're roommates so now it's awkward and scandy cuz they haven't told their third roommate at all!”

A: IM SORRY, WHAT BITCH??!!

SORRY FOR THE ALL CAPS BUT ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT DURING THEIR MOVIE NIGHT THE POPCORN WASNT ALL THAT WAS POPPIN, BUT HER PUSSY WAS ALSO?!!!!! I KNEW THAT JUNE WAS SECRETLY A BAD GIRL UNDERNEATH IT ALL. SHE PRETENDS THAT SHE ALL PURE AND INNOCENT AND JUST LIKE SIT IN A FUCKING CORNER WITH HER FUCKING BUGS AND FLOWERS OR WHATEVER BUT ANYBODY WHO FUCKS A BACK UP SINGER FOR A MARGINALLY SUCCESSFUL BAND CLEARLY LIVES ON THE FUCKING EDGE!!

I HEARD THE NEWS THAT JUNE, THE DOLL BABY, ARMSTRONG GOT THAT #DIC BUT I DIDN’T BELIEVE IT AND IF WHAT THEY SAY IS TRUE SHE IS INDEED A SCREAMER!!!!!!

COMING IN AT NUMBER NINE IS JUNE, WHO HAD YOU ALL FOOLED INTO THINKING SHE WAS A INNOCENT ANGEL BABY. WEVE DECIDED TO STAN UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

EIGHT.

Coming in at number eight is Phobe “Pharrah Abraham” Cole. It’s true, she was on top of things in more ways than one. But who am i to judge? I actually think it’s progressive, and super inspiring. I mean, ok, take this with a grain of salt, Im not really trying to lie but ... Phobe? Phobe has Genital Herpes. It’s been two weeks since a flair up (according to sources close to her) and I think it’s really brave of her to disclose her status with the MYRIAD of men she ENGAGED with during the week. It just goes to show that it CAN be done! I mean, you did tell them ... right Phobe? Moving on! I will say that while did used to ship Jack/Phobe during the night they hooked up but since Jack allegedly only lasted about 4 minutes it makes me wonder about a future with the two. So many girls who have been with him have written in and told me sex with him is ABYSMAL! He spends the entire time looking in the mirror or taking selfies that he refuses to be focused on the matter at hand. Of course this is all a rumor, but would you really put it past our neighborhood beauty queen? But I guess this isn’t about Jack, and his short comings. Anyways...

SEVEN.

Q: SharkThot asked “Hey DP I just want to start off by saying that I love your site, I’ve been a loyal viewer for years! And I hope Myles Bennett sees this because I love him even more! I don’t care what you say about him DP, Myles is my bae and would never do anyone wrong! Ugh, He makes me (Shark)Weak! I did see him earlier last week getting BULLIED by that Stark Bitch. What was that about?”

A: Aww, SharkThot,

I assume you mean Heidi Stark, the elusive chanteuse. Her arrival has caused quite the controversy, considering she materialized out of no where. I guess this particular countdown entry will have more to do with her than the actual question. But for those of you who don’t know, Heidi Stark is Julian’s slightly more attractive sister. Her strong presence is quite intimidating, but according to a lot of sources ... She’s a complete fraud. She speaks in an Australian accent, but some say she’s from, like, Missouri and only picked up an accent for #clout. Her “designer” clothes? Ross (Dress for Less). And she apparently was spotted raiding a bunch of Payless Shoe Stores for the cheapest prices prior to their shutdown, where she then proceeded to paint the bottom of all the shoes she got red. Oh! And the degree she got from that fashion school on New York? FORGED! She totally went to Devry. I mean, it’s nothing wrong with that, but omg, just be honest girl. Anyways, back to the point. The #BabySharks (Myles’ fandom name) were INCENSED when they saw Fraudi CORNERING Myles at the speed dating event. According to by standers she was totally waving her finger in HIS FACE, SHOVING HIM repeatedly before pouring the ENTIRE CONTENTS of her martini onto his FACE! You would think that since he works in the ocean (and is used to having liquids on his face (Golden Showers ... other bodily fluids) ), Myles would have been unbothered by her VICIOUS ATTACK, but it was said that he left CRYING. Poor Guy. (Lol sike i don’t give a fck).

SIX.

Q: Loganista asked “How could you possibly still be loyal to “King Jason” when all he cares about is that CUNT Alex. You know I saw them going into one of those FUCK SUITE when just 2 days ago they hated each others guts. They make me sick. Do you think it’s time to move on DP?”

A: Hey Loganista,

Ugh, same! You know, Logan Lancaster, and BernBern<3 are right there looking all sexy and things of that nature, hmm, so who knows .. perhaps I could move on one of these days. But not now. But speaking of LongDick Lancaster and the #Jalex reunion you mentioned, the #Lolex and #Jalina dates were less than eventful. The two spent the entire time thinking of the other instead of getting to know the people I set them up with. It makes me feel really bad for LDLogan because he is truly such a nice guy but everyone he gets involved with, is using him. Leah totes just uses him as a dick call, and Alex is always using him as a rebound. When she was on the date with Logan all she could talk about was Jason, Jason, Jason. I heard she told Logan that if it were “6 months ago” (when she wasn’t involved with Jason) she would totally be on all fours for him. Which is bullshit, because she totally FUCKED Logan like, two weeks ago when she was mad at Jason. So what’s the truth Alex?

Thank God Alegenda came out of this unscathed. I wouldn’t want a QUEEN like her with court jester Jason. Sadly, she won’t be able to be with Devin like I wanted, since he had sex with Phobe and … well…

FIVE.

Speaking of Jason, another Sorrentino is on the list of topics for tonight. Brooklyn Sorrentino! Ok, so for those of you who don’t know. Brooklyn was seen crying after an encounter with her ex, Grayson Fox. As I’ve said before, they were engaged to being MARRIED, but out of no where, he left her.  So. naturally I did a little more research on she and her GrayBae Fox and what I found blew my wig right the fuck off. Ok, so it is alleged that (Actual) Daddy Sorrentino (that’s Jason/Brooklyn’s dad) PAID HIM OFF because he had no plans of a complete and total LOSER like Grayson dating, and MARRYING, his daughter. So after receiving this unknown amount of money, Grayson left Brooklyn a note saying his Goodbyes. And now … all the have is memories.

OF COURSE I don’t believe this shit! I still think the bitch's pussy stinks, so he didn’t want to wake up to that every frickin’ day of his life. And besides, it’s been how many years? Wouldn’t he have just told her what’s up at this point? Instead of moving into the same town as her, and acting like NOTHING is wrong? And then proceeding to FLIRT with the LIKES OF DAKOTA SONG? Yes! The two were seen getting pretty cozy, locking fingers, playing footsies, and exchanging hair-care regimes during Summer Crush. Poor Brooklyn, first she got beat up by Phobe and THEN we find out she lost her man. What a loser.

FOUR.

Q: AshersBabyMomma asked “STOP making fun of Asher! It’s so mean!!!!!!!! Asher is really trying his best to get by and all you do is pick on him! Us #Ashies will boycott your blog if you do not stop!”

A: Well, you’re in luck because coming in at number __ is Asher himself! 

And you’re right AshersBabyMomma, Asher has surprisingly been on his best behavior recently. Either that, or you demons have managed to make him look like an angel. Honestly? I think I’m actually going to start being nice to Asher. No more calling him things like “Crackhead Asher”, Ashy Lip Asher, Ashy Asher, and more things Of That Nature. He’s really gotten his act together and I’m so proud of him, and even more apologetic for the way I’ve treated him. 

A moment of silence for the old me that used to make fun of him…

…

…Anyways, Asher is an Escort now (as I said before). He totes is fucking [redacted] in exchange for money and drugs (CRACK not included). In FACT, it is alleged that he offered his services to Alec Clarke. Again, this could all be made up, but they were spotted disappearing into a hotel together where they stayed until the sun came up. (#Romantic) Now girl MIND YOU, Alec is Adam’s roomie, and multiple sources have claimed that he is secretly in LOVE with him! Which is a LIE! If Alec IS a MLM then he has WAY better standards than a Tax Evasionista. And I’m sure Asher has better standards than Alec… well … *Hot Dog on a Stick Flashbacks*..

Nevermind.

THREE.

Q: Emrestoplip asked “Ugh but the Yavuz family are all HOT and not problematic unless ur holding out on us DP”

A: Well I must admit they ARE all hot but sadly they are just as problematic as the rest. 

Specifically that Kessa girl. Her Lifetime Original Movie of a life has completely ruined the dynamic of her family. It’s made both Emre and Leyla (her siblings) RESENT her more than they care to admit and thing are sups awkward between all of them. It’s really sad. Funny that this is the entry right after an Adam mention because coming in at number four are both Adam and Kessa. The two were paired for a date and things got Out of Control.

It really has placed Adam on my heart throb list because little did I FUCKING know that Adam knew how to THROW IT DOWN in the bedroom. The two were caught on camera BANGING THE FUCK OUT OF EACH OTHER, FOUR TIMES IN ONE WEEK. Here I thought Adam was the only sane Aldridge, but it was all a SHAM. HES THE WORST OFFENDER!!!!

NOT ONLY is he a BEAST in the SHEETS, he was spotted EATING KESSA OUT on the SIDE of a BUILDING!!! IM LITERALLY SCREAMING! and to make matters worse, Kessa then left him and got eaten out by, one, Marley Callahan. I SERIOUSLY HOPE EVERYONE GOT TESTED AFTER THIS WEEK because you guys are OUT of your MCFREAKIN MINDS.

I guess you can catch Kessa in first AND second service on Sunday now that she got the most sanctified, purified, holyfied COCK of her life. Amen!

TWO.

Q: MackenziesStolenBrushes asked “Any updates on #JaiMac?”

A: This is a great way to almost end this countdown.

For those of you who don’t know Jamie and Cunty Westwood have decided to amend their troubles and get back together. (Yes, the paintbrushes (that Jamie hid) are back in Cunty’s easel, or whateverthefuck.) This might not be the sensational drama that you were expecting to see at the end of this list but I think it’s a great closer. Jamie and Mac are a shining example of a healthy relationship, and I’ve decided they should ALMOST close out the show.

I do wonder if Jamie found out about the times Mac engaged in MULTIPLE hardcore sexual acts with the #DemonDick himself, Julian Stark. They only ended their fling like two days before #JaiMac got back together, so I’m sure they did? Omg not to gossip, BUT, ok,  I don’t know how to say this politely, but ... there was ass eating involved (on Mac’s end … obviously… I mean, look at him...), and a lot of “I love you’s” were shared between the two. Not to mention cuddling. Late night phone calls, texts, and omg I'm pretty sure they were almost a couple.

Anyways, this might have happened before the event, but to see these two going into PRIDE MONTH a happy couple really is iconic and I thank them for deciding to work things out. Love you two! Kisses!

xx

So I’m sure, you’re wondering who Number 1 is ... 

find out tommorrow.

xo, DP.

[hamelaisley]

prague...dedicated to becky

PRAGUE

Chapter 1

"we could run..........you and me. we could go now and never look back"

"are you serious???"

"i have money saved up josh. i could get us new identities. create a escape route. for now just keep up appearances.........,go to berlin like were gonna shoot. well leave to go to prague from there"

"what are you saying jen?????"

"im saying i wanna be a real person again........with you. thats what you want right???? i mean this is it josh. will you run away with me????"

-XX-

"aaaaaand action!!!!" yelled francis lawrence.

any other time this would have been joshs idea of heaven. working with his friend all day. but now.... it was just really awkward and he couldnt wait until the wrap.

josh started to mumble his lines but was cut off by jen.

"im really sorry francis but........i cant do this right now......." she said and then walked off to her trailer.

it had been like this ever sense....ever sense prague.......

-XX-

josh walked up to the train platform trying to find jen. suddenly he saw her standing with a suitcase and wearing a red jacket with cute black heels on. she spotted him and immediately smiled at him. he walked over to her.

"hey!!!!! i was starting to think you werent coming!!!" she said.

josh looked down at his shoes. jen didnt notice or care. jen pulled a folder out of her purse.

"k so here are our new identities. for now on your name is thomas campbell and mine is elle sinclair. we can talk about there back stories or whatever on the train ride to prague" she said.

"jen........." josh said.

"oh dont worry about the ride......... its only a hour long and if your bored you have me to talk to" she said.

"jen i.......i dont think we should do this........."

jen looked kinda confused.

"what do you mean?????"

"i mean we..... we made a promise that we would make these movies. we have a responsibility to the fans and everyone in the movie to finish it.... this is our life jen. this fairytale about running away is nice but this is where we belong. in hollywood. living our real lives....."

"josh its not that simple....... you dont understand but everything here is fake.....but this" she said and grabbed josh's hand. ".....this is simple. this is our real life. we have to go josh...... are you coming????? please come with me josh....."

josh paused and let go of jen's hand.

"i cant......im sorry........"

-XX-

josh walked up to jen's trailer and knocked.

"jen its me.....please let me in........"

"josh no. i dont want to talk to you now"

josh could tell she was crying.

"jen......."

"go away!!!!!"

josh leaned against the door and felt a single tear on his cheek.

"ok" he whispered.

Chapter 2

things were awkward on set. jen was avoiding josh and it was making him feel awful and lonely. he was always talking and laughing with her and now that he wasnt he felt empty and hurt. he hated being alone because then your forced into listening to your own thoughts instead of someone elses voice. god he couldnt wait for this to end.

but.......but what if this awkwardness never ended?? what if jen never forgave him???

he stared at the script in his hands. he was trying to memorize his lines because he had to and to distract himself from the situation with jen. it wasnt really working. he looked out the window of his trailer and saw jen in her own trailer looking straight at him. but when she saw that he saw her she looked away.

josh threw the papers on the ground frustratedly. he needed to talk to jen. even if she didnt want to talk to him. fuck, hed tie her up and force her to listen if thats what it took.

he walked out the door and to jen's trailer. he knocked and waited for her to answer nervous that she wouldnt. but she did. thank GOD thought josh.

"hey" jen said not looking at him. she was wearing a pretty white dress that would probably blow in the wind if it was windy. it reminded josh of the first time he saw jen.

-XX-

he put some cologne on his wrists and pulled on the jacket he was wearing. then he looked in the mirror and fixed his hair. he felt like a girl but he wanted to look perfect before meeting his co-star jennifer lawrence. they talked on the phone a few days ago and he has instantly fell in love with her. she was so funny and comfortable with who she was. and josh knew she was gorgeous. he saw her at the oscars when she was nominated for winters bone. she was irresistible to josh even though he didnt meet her in person yet. but that was going to change in a few minutes if josh didnt die from his heart beating so fast that it fell out of his chest.

he looked at his watch and took a deep breath. if he didnt leave now he was gonna be late.

he left his house and got into his car and drove to jen's house. when he got there he couldnt help but laugh at the garden nomes in the yard of her house. they were cute just like her.

josh wiped his sweaty hands in his pants and rang the door bell. jen answered.

joshs mouth went dry when he saw her. even though she was wearing a super simple white dress she was still breathtaking stunning. her eyes were the bluest blue josh had ever seen. her lips were full. her cheeks were pink like she ran to the door or something, and she had a cute button nose. jen smiles and you could see her dimples.

"well what are you waiting for silly!!!!! come in the damn house its frickin cold outside hahah" she said.

josh did as was told and went Ito her house. suddenly he stopped and just looked at her. he didnt think it was possible to be more attracted to this girl but that was before he saw her in person. it was love at first sight for him.

oh god josh thought im inlove with a girl and i dont even know her full name.....

"uh.....jen???"

"thats mizz lawrence to you" she joked.

he laughed. "k so this is kinda super weird but i was wondering........ can you tell me your middle name????"

she looked at him silently for a few seconds before saying something. "shrader. my middle name is shrader" she said.

"jennifer shrader lawrence" josh said. and it was the most beautiul name hed ever heard.

-XX-

"hey......can i come in????" josh asked. jen nodded her head "yes" so josh went in.

"look josh about the other day........"

"its ok jen. really its fine like dont worry about it" josh said.

"i just really miss you so much. what happened in prague......im so sorry jennifer for hurting you. i didnt mean to hurt you. and i want us to go back to the way things were. please????? i dont wanna loose you.......... i love you"

"josh.........."

josh cut her off as he leaned forward and kissed her. to his disappointment though, she pulled away after a few seconds.

"josh..........we need to break up."

Chapter 3

"josh..........we need to break up."

out of all the things josh thought jen would say that did not even make the list. he expected that theyd need to talk some things out but.........

"....i....jen what?"

"josh its.....please dont look at me like that....i just think that were not the same people we were when we first fell in love.....i dont want to ruin our friendship"

she was right about one thing. they werent the same people they were when they first fell in love. the old jen would never do something like this to him.

-XX-

"oh you can do better than that!!!" jen yelled at josh as she flew through the air. josh laughed and pushed her back harder. his arms were getting kinda sore. who knew that pushing someone on a swing could be so much work??

"jen my arms are tired." he complained. "im gonna take a break"

"your WEAK JOSH HUTCHERSON. YOUR FUCKING WEAK!!!"

"well not all of us can be nicholas fucking hoult jen. maybe you should call him so that he can come push you" he said. but right after he said it he wished he didnt. it wasnt fair to jen. she didnt know how much it hurt him to see her with nick. and even if she did he didnt have a right to be mad. it wasnt her fault that she loved nick and not him.

"look jen im sorry" he shouted up to her. she ignored him.

he stepped back away from the swing and sat down. he watched her for a little while until suddenly jen let go of the swing and literally went flying through the air. he knew she did it on purpose because she was laughing like an idiot the whole way until she hit the mulch. but even then she was still laughing. josh ran over to her to make sure she was okay. her knees were scraped and her hair was messed up and had pieces of mulch stuck in it.

"i wanted to come sit with you but i didnt want to do the whole slowing down thing normal people do when there done swinging" she told him.

josh rolled his eyes and laughed.

"god dammit jen!!! you know i love you but you can be such an airhead sometimes!!!" he laughed. jen didnt. she stared up at him and met his eyes.

"you love me????"

josh started to panic. did he say that out loud???

"josh....do you???? love me????"

he couldnt tell if she was kidding or not. he could easily get himself out of this one. of course he loved jen. she was his best friend!!! but for some reason he didnt want to get out of anything. he wanted to tell her. there. in the hawaiian park under spring clouds.

"i.......jennifer how could i not??? ive loved you ever sense that very first phone call. sense i very first saw you. ive loved you every time weve laughed and every time weve fought. i loved you when you had a boyfriend and i loved you when i had a girlfriend. ive loved you during my proudest moments and my weakest moments. ive loved you during nothings and somethings and everything in between. so yes jennifer i love you. ive been hopelessly inlove with the girl in the white dress from the very beginning and will be right up until the end."

jen didnt say anything for a while. instead she just took his hands in hers and leaned into him so that there faces were pretty much touching. josh fought the desire to just lean forward and take those perfect lips into his own.

finally she said something. "so you DO remember what color dress i was wearing when we met!!!"

josh smiled. of course thats what she got from that.

"ya i guess i do"

"josh??"

"ya????"

"we broke up. me and nick"

josh tried not to look excited. not that he really was. he was just worried about jen.

"why would he break up with you??? your the most perfect girl in the world and if he doesnt see that then he doesnt deserve you!!!!"

"i broke up with him josh...."

"what???? why???"

"because i love you too"

and then like belle and her beast there lips met taking away the beast and leaving only a prince.

-XX-

"jen thats bullshit and you know it....." josh said to her. "you know i hate being lied to......why dont you just tell me the real reason???"

jen sighed not looking him in the eye.

"josh after prague i.....was hurt. you hurt me when you said no. it made me feel like you didnt love me and i......called someone who i knew still loved me....."

"huh??? who???"

"josh.....i called nick"

Chapter 4

"josh.....i called nick. okay?!? i called nick and one thing led to another and we decided to give our relationship another chance. im sorry josh. i didnt mean to hurt you......."

josh felt his eyes start to sting with salty tears. how could she do this to him???

"did you screw him???"

"what??"

"i said....did you screw him"

"josh......."

"answer me"

".....yes. but josh you need to understand that you hurt me....."

he didnt hear anything that she said after that. her lips were moving but there was no sound. he stared straight through her.

"josh........josh please say something......."

"you.....jen you *cheated* on me??" josh asked.

"it....we were on a break and i was hurting josh you need to know that please know that"

josh fell out of his daze after hearing that.

"god jennifer you are so full of shit"

"uh excuse me?????"

"and to think i actually felt bad about prague.... i called you 273 times after that jennifer. you didnt answer 273 times. and it turns out that was because you were too busy sleeping with someone else????"

"thats not fair-"

"actually i think it's perfectly fucking fair jennifer. god i worked my ASS off for this relationship. i felt guilty for those whole three months we didnt talk. i missed you. i just wanted to make things better and i was stupid enough to think that you wanted that too!! god im such a idiot!!!"

jen was mad.

"how dare you say that stuff to me??? do you think it was easy for me to not talk to you for three months??!?!" she yelled.

"well after what you just told me ya i do!!" he shouted.

"i thought we were taking a break!!!"

"you know what??? fuck our friendship. you fucking disgust me and i dont want anything to do with you. not anymore"

jen didnt say anything.

josh stormed out of the trailer taking jens silence as his time to leave.

-XX-

"jennifer.....im so sorry. i was scared. scared to leave behind the life ive worked for my whole life. im a coward and im sorry. i shouldnt have left you in prague. i love you"

"i know that your mad and hurt and i know that i made you feel like that and im sorry im so fucking sorry. i love you jennifer"

"its been a week now......jen your scaring me. im worried about you.....please call me so i know that your ok??"

"jen im going crazy here.....its been a month sense i last kissed you......touched you......or fucking saw you...... i know your ignoring me but..... stop ok?? i miss you"

"jen......the decision that i made in prague. i know what it looks like. i know that it looks like i chose being an actor over.......over being with you. but thats not what happened. how i feel about you is real. very very real. and i know that you know how ive felt about you for a long time..... i told you.....we told each other and......and.........look jen i know that i probably hurt you. your probably hurt that i didnt run away with you in prague........but jen......i love you. i love you and i cant live without you. so.......please call me back"

the smell of pool water and listening to his voicemails was making jen feel dizzy. she held the phone to her ear and tried not to cry. but what she and josh had.......it was over now. she was never going to let herself get hurt like that again. she was stupid to think that josh would ever run away with her. her fairytale of running away from the fame and getting married and having kids and just living.......it was never gonna happen. and part of her knew she knew it wouldnt happen before this but that didnt make it hurt less.

she took the phone away from her head and looked at it one more time before she threw it into the pool.

"hey babe who was that???" nick asked.

"no one" she said. she leaned down and kissed nick on the ear. "absolutely no one"

Chapter 5

josh was so mad at jen he didnt even know what to do. the only thing he knew was that he had to get out of here before he exploded. so he went to the only place he could think of.

"oh hi josh" jena malone said when she saw it was josh who knocked on her trailer door.

"hi jena" josh said. jena opened the door a little bit more. he didnt move.

"well what are you waiting for silly!!!!"

josh felt like he was gonna throw up when she said that. even though jena didnt know that that was what jen had said to him when they first met didnt mean it didnt bother him a lot.

"i.....actually was wondering if i could maybe......take you out tonight??"

she smiled when he said that.

"ya id love to!! just let me get my purse and we can go k??"

"ya sounds good"

-XX-

"josh??? what are you doing here??? its midnight!!!" jen said after she opened her hotel door to see josh standing there with daisies.

"tonights our last night in hawaii" he said.

"ya so we should be sleeping because getting back to LA is gonna take forever"

"no.....we should be walking to the picnic i set up on the beach for us so that we can sleep on the plane" josh said. he took a purple daisy and put it in jen's hair. after that he gave her them.

jen smiled. "alright lead me to it"

they walked down to the beach holding hands. josh loved holding her hand. it made him feel so connected to her.

"oh my god josh this is awesome!!!!!" jen said when she saw joshs picnic.

they sat down and started to eat. jen looked up at the night sky. the moon was full and reflecting on the ocean.

"this is the most beautiful thing ive ever seen" she said. she was looking at the full moon.

"sure is" josh said. he was looking at jen.

-XX-

"so where are we gonna go????" asked jena. they were in joshs car.

"lou's" he said.

"whats that????"

"a club"

"oh fun"

on the drive there joshs phone started buzzing and didnt stop.

"sheesh!!! someone must really wanna talk to you!!!" jena joked.

"huh....weird" josh said.

when they got to the club josh checked his phone"

37 missed calls from Jennifer Lawrence and 37 new voicemails. his phone started buzzing again.

josh glared at his phone before turning it off. screw her josh thought.

josh went inside the club and saw that jena had already ordered them some drinks.

"just a few shots" she said. josh smiled. this was just what he needed to get his mind off jennifer shrader lawrence.

it got later and josh and jena got more drunk. they decided to go dance on the dance floor.

josh watched jena dance and realized how pretty she was. he never thought about jena like that before because he was too busy thinking about jen like that. he got close to her and started to dance with her.

"you are so gorgeous" he said. she laughed.

"your not do bad yourself handsome" she said.

josh leaned in and kiss jena. he pulled her waist closer to him and she put her hands around his neck.

"do you wanna come home with me???" josh asked.

"yeah but were gonna have to wait because were both to drunk to drive" she said. "lets see i called her like 20 minutes ago to come get us so.... oh there she is!!!!"

josh turned around to see who jena was talking about.

standing there was jen with tears on her cheeks. she looked at him and ran to the clubs bathroom.

"whats her deal....." jena laughed.

josh didnt care about jen anymore. he couldnt care about her. and besides what right does she have being hurt when she was the one who cheated on him?!?

josh smiled at jena and kissed her again.

with each second he kissed jena he could feel himself thinking less about jen.

this was just what he needed.

[virgiltheanxious]

Be My Guest (Polyamsanders)

Title:Be My Guest

Pairing: Polyamsanders

Warning: none, i believe

Word Count: 1,400 on the dot!

Summary: The sides have a nice morning.

Masterlist

Tags: Ask if you want to be tagged!

@my-happy-little-bean

(A/N): This was written for my good friend naomi who im not sure if she wants to be tagged BuT WEVE BEEN FRIENDS FOR A YEAR EXACTLY AS OF YESTERDAY SO WOOH!!

Virgil stirred the sugar in his coffee and yawned, blinking his eyes a few times to get the sleepiness out of them. He picked up the mug and brought it to the table. He sat down and put his head in one hand, slowly bringing the cup up and taking a sip. He was surprised no one else was up and getting ready for the day. It was 6:45 A.M. which was a little early but Patton usually made breakfast, Roman was usually blabbering about something, and Logan usually was sat at the table reading a book about space and drinking coffee.

Virgil wasn’t entirely complaining, though, because the quiet was a little bit nice and refreshing. Pulling out his phone, Virgil opened tumblr and scrolled through a bit, taking sips of his coffee every time he paused to read a long post. He glanced at the time and noticed that it was still only 6:55. Groaning, Virgil put his head on his table. He adjusted his body so his head was on an arm and he could still see his phone as he scrolled once more.

“Ah, Virgil! Nice to see you up already- Oh, are you sleeping?” Virgil heard Roman’s voice call out.

Virgil snapped his head up, almost knocking over his cup in the process.

“Does it look like I’m asleep?” Virgil sneered, quickly covering his mouth with his mug and taking a sip.

Roman rolled his eyes, responding to defend his case, “What was that for, emo nightmare?”

“Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity,” Virgil quipped, rolling his eyes more dramatically than Roman had.

“Your head was down on the table, you can’t blame me for the mistake,” Roman said, walking towards the kitchen.

With Roman’s back turned Virgil made a face at him, wagging his phone in the ear because that /should/ have made it obvious that he wasn't asleep. Roman turned back and Virgil went to normal, taking a sip of his coffee. He looked back down at his phone and only looked at Roman when he saw his back turned again. Virgil smiled slightly from behind his cup.

“Good morning, Virgil, Roman. I do hope you slept well,” Logan said, adjusting his tie as he walked towards the coffee machine.

“I got a full 9 hours! Beauty sleep is important. I’m not sure our ~insert nickname here~ was as successful, though. He seems cranky,” Roman complained.

Virgil glared at the back of his head. As the coffee machine finished dispensing, Logan’s coffee, Logan sat down across from Virgil and looked him dead in the eyes. Virgil shrank down from Logan’s intimidating stare.

“So, Virgil. How much sleep /did/ you get?” Logan asked, using both hands to bring his coffee mug to his mouth.

Virgil slouched even further. “Uh… three hours, maybe?”

“Virgil, we have talked about this. Getting a full nine hours is the optimal amount of sleep for functioning properly. It is also important for your body to get that amount of sleep so it can refresh from the day before. You really should be getting eight and a half hours at the least,” Logan ranted, pushing up his glasses.

Virgil looked down, a little bit guilty, and stirred what was left of his coffee again. He sighed as he heard Patton coming down the stairs and put his head back on the table, this time pushing away his coffee.

“Morning!” Patton’s cheery voice ripped through the quiet sounds of Roman putting together the ingredients for a smoothie. “Virge, you shouldn’t sleep at the table, it’s not good for your back!” Patton scolded, pulling Virgil up. Virgil frowned in response, causing Patton to pull his chair out and squat down just enough so they were at eye level with each other.

“Hey, are you okay Virgil?” He asked, searching Virgil’s eyes.

Virgil only rolled them in response. “I’m fine, but I’d surely be better if Teach could not lecture me ‘bout my sleeping habits. It’s not like I can help it anyway,” Virgil muttered, looking down and pulling his sleeve over his hand.

“Well, I’m sure he’s just worried about you because he loves you!” PAtton exclaimed, popping back up and patting Virgil’s head. Virgil grinned the slightest bit and “fixed” his hair. Virgil looked up to see Patton hit Logan lightly as he walked past.

“I do suppose that I turned out liking you a lot more than I originally planned,” Logan said, immediately taking a sip from his own coffee and avoiding Virgil’s gaze.

“...I love you too, Lo.”

Roman chose that moment to turn on the blender and Virgil groaned. “Princey! Can you not! I was sorta having a moment!” Virgil shouted, much loud enough for Roman to hear. But Roman didn’t move to turn off the blender.

Virgil sighed in relief when it was turned off a minute later. “Thank god,” he muttered finishing off his coffee. Only to hear it turn back on again not too soon after.

“Oh come on! Princey, I know you don’t even need it turned on again, so cut it out!” Virgil yelled, looking at Roman who was staring at him with a smirk and a devious glint in his eyes.

Virgil got up and walked over to him, moving to turn off the blender himself, but got blocked by Roman. He kept trying but to no avail as Roman blocked him each and every time. Virgil held hi hands over his ears, tired of the loud noise that the blender made.

“For the love of god turn it off!” Virgil said, clenching his eyes shut and not opening them until the sound stopped. He didn’t move his hands until he felt Roman bring them away. He looked up at Roman, teary eyed.

“Virgil, my love! I am so sorry I didn’t mean to startle you, I thought it was harmless-” Virgil muttered something under his breath, not meeting Roman’s eye anymore. “What was that, my love?”

“I said, I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass,” Virgil smirked, wiping the fake tears from his eyes and looking up at Roman.

“Why, that was just cruel!” Roman complained as Virgil made his way back to the table.

“Virgil, language!” Patton scolded, waving his spatula at Virgil’s back.

Virgil just looked at Logan, who smiled at him as he sat down next to him. He reached across the table to grab his empty coffee mug and fiddled with it. He waited patiently for breakfast, listening to Logan talk to Patton from across the room. Patton was soon finished and had the plates at the table.

“Thank you, Patton. This seems to be a satisfactory breakfast. I commend you on your work,” Logan said as a plate was put in front of him.

“Of course, Lo! Thank you for eating it,” Patton said, sitting in his own seat next to Roman.

-----

“-And then I brought my sword up and it glimmered in the light, just like in all those movies-”

“Roman you’re so extra,” Virgil said, moving some eggs around on his plate.

“I heard that!” Roman shouted, standing up and stopping his retelling of a story

“You were supposed to!” Virgil said back, giggling to himself. He quickly slapped his hand over his mouth and looked up at Roman who looked down at him with the biggest grin on his face. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Aw, Virge! That was so adorable!” Patton squealed. Virgil sank down in his chair and crossed his arms.

“Stop it.” He commanded, glaring across the table at both of the sides.

“I must say, your giggle was pleasing to my ears,” Logan commented, making Virgil snap his head to the left and look at his half grin.

“Logan, not you too! You’re supposed to be on my side with these things!” Virgil shouted.

“Aw, Virgil, just let us tell you how much we love you~” Patton requested, putting his head in one hand and gazing dreamily at the said side.

“...I guess you can,” Virgil reluctantly responded, knowing it would make Patton happy.

Virgil felt someone grasp his right hand and looked at Logan in surprise, since he normally wasn’t the one that showed his affection physically. Not that he did often in any other way, but it just seemed random to Virgil.

But he wasn’t going to complain.

[battystumutchildren-blog]

RYAN: -back at it again at the silvah dollah. it's kinda nice to have someplace new to stalk around the later hours of the day. she knows it's not exactly advisable for various reasons to transportalize out onto the satelite isolated far from her home. but... whatever. it's comfortable here and finding comfort elsewhere, somewhere more familiar, is a difficult task for her.-

RYAN: -she's hanging out at the counter again, poking at the remaining contents of a strawberry milkshake and being far less chatty than she was yesterday.-

SILVAH: -Given that there's not really much ON this station other than Skaianet research facilities, private research facilities and basically....the one resturaunt at least there's not much trouble Ryan can get up to up here. Silvah is just finishing cleaning and restoring his stocks from last night. He stayed up far too late and got a little drunk himself, but he's in good spirits. He's fairly sure the reopening was  rousing success and that he's gonna make back the money he spent on the deck. Big man is boppin with the radio as he works until he finally makes his way back behind the counter and sees Ryan there. His fins flick.-

SILVAH: Blondie!

SILVAH: I thought I made a regular outta you.

RYAN: -perks up, immediately putting on a smile when she hears his voice, but it's definitely half hearted.-

RYAN: naturally??? youve got some great vibes going on here. :blush:

SILVAH: I built it that way babycakes, but that don't mean it ain't nice to hear.

SILVAH: -starts restocking the baked goods displays as they chitchat.-

SILVAH: You had some pretty good vibes yourself last night. -Not so much today though, huh? He's peepin on her.-

RYAN: again. naturally! as a new regular youll soon discover im always the life of the party. :wink:  -leans on the counter, chin in her hand.- SILVAH: That's quite a claim. Maybe I should think about buyin a leaderboard. Huh huh.

SILVAH: Sure are cute though. Feel like I should be payin you to sit there and look pretty.

RYAN: well im not about to turn down that offer. :hugging: 

RYAN: ive got a pretty lengthy resume as a professional cutie. you wouldnt regret the decision.

SILVAH: Now, now. I'm not totally sold.  You strike me as a troublemaker too.

SILVAH: Acutally now that I'm thinkin about it, the round robin never made it to ya.

SILVAH: What's your story?

RYAN: :scream: 

RYAN: its not polite to ask a lady such questions...

RYAN: which is definitely NOT something a troublemaker would say. :thinking: SILVAH: Keepin it close to the vest I see. That's fine. I'll get it out of ya eventually.

SILVAH: Food is great at makin people talk. RYAN: -chinhands intensifies.- yeah? what do you find is the best thing to feed a person to get them to share their life story? SILVAH: Somethin' caffeinated.

SILVAH: I'll tell you what- I'm crossin strawberry milkshakes off the list as of today.

RYAN: -giggles. geez... it feels good to laugh.-

RYAN: okay fine. youve fed me enough lines to change my tune. :stuck_out_tongue: 

RYAN: youre right about me... i am a troublemaker. but im trying to cut back these days. SILVAH: -Seems satisfied at getting her to laugh. And to crack.-

SILVAH: Respect, little lady. It's not easy.

SILVAH: I'm also one of those.

RYAN: yeah? what are your vices?

RYAN: mine incluuuuude... -checks them off on her fingers as she says them in an attempt to keep it light.- running away. all manner of narcotics. and beautiful sad men and women that only break your heart.

RYAN: so you know. the standard really.

SILVAH: You're right. That is a hell of a resume. -Scratches under his  fat chin with Robut hand.-

SILVAH: Lesee....I'm right there with ya on runnin away. Dissapointin my family. Sexual deviancy. An you may have noticed that I like to eat a lil bit.

SILVAH: We already got the makins of a pretty good country song. Too bad that's not my favorite genre.

RYAN: hehehe. id love to inspire any kinda song really.

RYAN: but other than that it seems weve got a lot in common. -sips milkshake.-

RYAN: ive been... disappointing a lot of people for a long time. but i feel like i really dropped the fucking ball again recently. :weary:

SILVAH: -Now he's got both fins angled towards her.- You wanna get into it?

SILVAH: Don't gotta. But if you feel like you need to I have time.

SILVAH: That's how I got so fat. I'm full of secrets.

RYAN: -snickers and shrugs, swirling the straw around in the glass thoughtfully.- well... guess theres no harm in it.

RYAN: since youre being so nice and charming. :wink: 

RYAN: things have just been... i dunno.

RYAN: first i fell off the wagon.

RYAN: definitely disappointed my family... and probably my boyfriend. or like. whatever our deal even is. -sighs.-

RYAN: then my ex comes along and starts pulling some burn book bullshit... spilling all my secrets. pissing off my friends. making aforementioned romantic relationship all the more complicated. i think.

RYAN: ugh. -just sighs. it's hard to really dig deep when it's all so frustrating, so she just kinda slumps a little.-

SILVAH: Mm. Did ya say some things you regret?

RYAN: -nods slowly, pouting a little.-

RYAN: yeah. so much stupid shit.

RYAN: im trying to fix things but... i dont know--

RYAN: i dont know what im doing half the time.

SILVAH: -Pauses for a minuite, and while he's processing all the vibes he's picking up from her he's making himself look busy, which is something he's pretty practiced at by now.-

SILVAH: It's not the easy route. It's easier to keep cuttin out. Start over somewhere where they don't know ya. But that would be a waste in the long run.

SILVAH: If you keep tryin eventually they'll see the effort and appreciate it. Even if you're graspin at straws and you say all the wrong shit. RYAN: -peers up at him, finding that answer... strangely comforting. she gets the sense he understands. maybe because of his own experiences, or just because he's used to dealing with sad sacks like her. it was kind of a cliche. in any case, she's quiet for a moment as she thinks it all over too. her voice is a little hushed when she does speak, a bit embarrassed by admitting the things she is... but knowing full well she needs to say it.-

RYAN: i feel like my efforts are pushing him away.

RYAN: alienating him cuz he feels guilty too. hes always stuck in his own head.

  RYAN: i think he feels like hes not good enough. but i dont really get it. im the one who kept running away.

RYAN: he never did anything wrong. at least i dont think he did. it just-- a shitty time. and i dunno if its ever gonna pass so long as im around to remind him that-- fuck.

RYAN: -puts her head in her hand with a sigh.- sorry im not making sense anymore.

SILVAH: -Frowns as he takes this in, and at the same time takes in extra information. All her good intentions, the desperation that go along with them.- Y'know most of the time tryin to anticipate what someone's gonna do or why they feel the way they feel is real misleadin. Unless you have a real blunt discussion about it, you could never know. You might've fucked up, but it don't mean every bad thing that person's feelin is your fault.

SILVAH: The stuff you can pin down as yours is what you should concentrate on, is what I'm sayin.

RYAN: -peers up from behind her hand, eyes glossy with sadness but... there's some hope too. she laughs a little, trying not to seem too broken up about the stuff going on in her head.-

RYAN: i hear you.

RYAN: i just...

RYAN: wanna know im making someone happy for once.

RYAN: you know?

SILVAH: -She seems so vulnerable, it almost hurts to look. They're barely acquaintances at this point, but he doesn't care, he's gonna lightly reach out and touch her hand with his non robotic one.- You got yourself a super acheivable goal there, blondie. I think you're gonna be ok.

SILVAH: -Backs it up with a warm smile too. Believe him. He belives in you!-

RYAN: -well... it's hard not to smile when it feels like someone believes in you. and for some reason, in this moment she kind of believes it too. she doesn't mind the touch. she welcomes it in fact, feeling a little bit touch starved lately.-

RYAN: ill definitely be okay if i keep coming back for these milkshakes...

SILVAH: Hah! You think I'm gonna let you keep orderin just milkshakes.

SILVAH: -Pats her hand, gives it a gentle little squeeze and then releases her.-

RYAN: -giggles again. what a big softie...- i thought the customer was always right???? rude ass...

SILVAH: -Laughs with her. Huh huh huh.- I'mma personally fight whoever came up with that horse shite. The customer ain't right even half the time, let alone always.

SILVAH: This is the only place in the goddamn world where I control everythin. It ain't a fuckin democracy.

RYAN: -snorts and then full on cackles.- geez!!! then i guess ill have to refer to your expert opinion every day im here. :wink:

  SILVAH:  Heh heh. S'long as its real food some of the time I'll be a happy clam.

[topsolarpanels]

The 76 ers’ mad analytics experimentation was doomed to fail- but at least it was memorable

Basketball had never seen an attempt to build a franchise the route Sam Hinkie wanted to. And with Colangelo and DAntoni now on board, were unlikely to see it again

The Sixers have attained losers out of all of us.

The 1-29 experiment in tanking analytics is being tainted by the introduction of basketball people in Jerry Colangelo and Mike DAntoni. After more than two and a half years of of Sam Hinkie being able to do whatever he wants, dump any asset and draft every damaged 7ft guy the world over, those above Hinkie are now forcing him to be influenced by two guys whose knowledge of statistical analysis probably ends with recognizing also that a three-pointer is worth more than a two-pointer.

In Colangelo and DAntoni, chairman of basketball operations and associate head coach-and-four respectively, the Sixers are wrecking what mad statistician/ GM Hinkie was constructing before we all got to see the final Frankenstatistic product. The Sixers are like a bold avant garde movie that had the studio fell Keanu Reeves and Reese Witherspoon into it halfway through filming. Pulling Hinkies computer plug now is like refusing to allow infinite monkeys to finish writing on their typewriters.

Its dropping the funding on the development of an alternative energy vehicle that was to be fueled entirely on weed smoke.

If those analogies are bad or confounding or tortured, theyre even more fitting for whatever it is that Hinkie was attempting to do with his bad and confounding and tormented Sixers. Unfortunately , now well never know. Because now the Sixers have basketball people with basketball knowledge.

Jeff Skversky (@ JeffSkversky) December 21, 2015

#Sixers chairperson Jerry Colangelo tells #ESPN the #Sixers are absence basketball people& knowledge – that’s why they hired Mike D’Antoni

Yuck. With the input of Colangelo and DAntoni, the Sixers will no doubt become like any other squad, scratching and clawing for semi-relevance and a low playoff seed barring a generational star falling into their laps.

Hinkie promised something different. No squad had ever tanked like Hinkies Sixers. Previous sports tankings were designed to land one special player and then instantly get to work on contending. Hinkies tanking was indefinite, geared to draft no one in particular other than maybe discovering the NBAs first eight-footer and didnt promise arguing any time soon. This is a team that has won one of its last 40 games over two seasons and indicates zero signs of arriving improvement.

Basketball had never seen an attempt to build a franchise this route. And with the Sixers giving up, were unlikely to ever see it again.

Maybe Colangelo, Hinkie, DAntoni and Brett Brown will mesh perfectly and build a balanced squad in Philadelphia that will contend for championships in the near future. But even if that happens, well still be left with the nagging is the issue of what might have been. Awesome or terrible and it was looking more and more like terrible Hinkies ultimate The Process Sixers were going to be memorable.

Weve lost them eternally. We are losers. We are all just Sixers now.

Vine of the week

Alex Kennedy (@ AlexKennedyNBA) December 18, 2015

Kevin Durant x Dr J – Under The Basket Reverse Layup( Vine by @TheCauldron) https :// t.co/ BnTBDgJQy5

In last weeks tight four-point loss at Cleveland, Durant pulled off a pretty spot-on Dr J impression in the first quarter. But its not even Durants best Julius Erving-style reverse layup in his career. Check out this ridiculousness from three seasons ago against the Nuggets TAGEND

When your wingspan is that of an adult condor, the normal binds of sidelines and backboards simply dont apply.

How did LeBron carry the Cavalier this week?

After LeBron sat out back on December 5 in Clevelands loss to the Heat, he has returned to median 27, six and five as Cleveland has won five in a row. Kyrie Irving even owes his first points of the season to LeBron thanks to James passing up a dunk on Sunday to give Irving an easy bucket.

Somewhere someone awful ripped James for over-passing on this play.

Quote of the week

I actually feel sorry for people who have nothing to do on Christmas Day other than watch an NBA game. I think we get a little carried away with ourselves in sports supposing were more important than everything else. Stan Van Gundy

Full disclosure: that hilarious quote is not from this week. Its not even from this year. Van Gundy said it back in 2009 when he was head coach-and-four of the Orlando Magic.( Fun fact: the Magic were then penalty by Scrooge Stern over Van Gundys public objection to working on Christmas. Really .) Van Gundys Pistons arent scheduled to play on Christmas this year, so he can expend the vacation doing whatever it is that people with rich, full lives do instead of watching basketball. Watching A Christmas Story over and over maybe?

Power Rankings

1. Golden State Warriors( Last week: 1 )

After their slip-up against the Bucks, the Warriors seem to be rolling on towards the 1996 Bulls wins record with back-to-back victories by an average margin of 17 points. But maybe not everything is perfect. Consider that Steph Curry is shooting just 47% from the floor in his last four games while NBA laughing stock Kobe Bryant is shooting 51% in his last four. Can the Warriors genuinely expect to win a title in 2015 with a shooting guard who is worse than Kobe? Hashtag: FunWithStats.

2. San Antonio Spurs( 2 )

Gregg Popovich is on-record as disliking the three-point shoot, but Kawhi Leonard is on pace for a career-high in three-pointers made and his 47.2 three-point percentage is even better than Currys. Leonard better knock it off or he could get benched.

3. Cleveland Cavaliers( 4 )

Kyrie Irving played his first game of the season on Sunday against the Sixers. Bullying is incorrect and the Cavaliers should apologize.

4. Oklahoma City Thunder( 3 )

Kevin Durant hit a go-ahead jumper with 5.8 seconds left on Monday night and then blocked Chris Paul as day expired to give the Thunder a 100 -9 9 win in Los Angeles against the Clippers. Its probably more productive if we all stop debating if Durant or Russell Westbrook is the best player on the Thunder and instead talking here how fun it is to watch a team play that has both of them healthy and in their primes.

5. Miami Heat (8 )

The Heat are said to be a possible landing place for Dwight Howard in a potential trade, which are truly be a good deal for Miami if theyre looking to get a 30 year-old player in rapid decline who is owed $23 million next year.

6. Atlanta Hawks( 16 )

Dennis Schroder had a tooth knocked out against Portland on Monday night and reacted by calmly placing it in his sock.

Joe Giglio (@ JoeGiglioSports) December 22, 2015

Dennis Schroder lost a tooth last night and decided to set it in his sock. https :// t.co/ QWPc7MaPw 5

If Schroder puts things like teeth in his socks, the lint tray in his washing machine must be quite a sight.

7. Indiana Pacers( 9 )

George Hill is the next Jason Kidd. Not because hes a future Hall of Famer. Hes not. Hes just a point guard who, like Kidd, will forever have regrettable photos of himself online with a blonde dye chore.

8. Toronto Raptors( 5 )

The Raptors have lost three of four, including a 10 -point home loss to the lowly Kings on Monday. Maybe the unusually warm wintertime climate has tricked them into playing like they do in April.

9. Dallas Mavericks( 11 )

Head coach Rick Carlisle tells Chandler Parson has been a lot of hard work to recover from hybrid microfracture surgery on his right knee: Everybody wants a nice cooked steak, but nobody wants to see you chopping up the cows in the back. The last five or six months, Parson has been in the back butchering clows thats the kind of work hes had to do. Rick, you play in Texas. Everyone is absolutely fine with chopping up cows.

10. Chicago Bulls( 6 )

The Bulls have lost three in a row and Jimmy Butler tells new head coach-and-four Fred Hoiberg needs to coach the team a lot harder. Before this year, the Bulls were coached by the ball of stress and rage that is Tom Thibodeau, so Butlers idea of what constitutes intense coaching may be a little bit skewed.

11. Detroit Pistons( 15 )

The Pistons released Josh Smith a year ago today. Detroit was 5-23 at the time and has gone 43 -3 9 since. Perhaps the Clippers, Smiths current employer, should try to turn their lucks around by releasing him this year.

12. Orlando Magic( 14 )

As 24 year-old Magic center Nikola Vucevic continues to take steps to toward becoming a star, its fun to think back to 2012 when he was a throw-in with Andre Iguodala in the trade that netted the Sixers Andrew Bynum and Jason Richardson. What if the Sixers had maintained Vucevic? Sam Hinkie would have yet another talented seven-footer on his roster. On the downside, Vucevic would be helping Hinkies squad win games.

13. Boston Celtics( 10 )

Celtics fans dedicated Kevin Garnett a long salute on Monday night in what was probably his last-ever game in Boston.

Garnett smiled broadly even though his squad lost. This is not the same Kevin Garnett who played in Boston.

14. Los Angeles Clippers( 7 )

The disappointing Clippers and awful Lakers play on Christmas Day. The only way the sports day can get worse in L.A. is if everyone wakes up and find the Rams and Chargers under their tree.

15. Houston Rockets( 17 ) The Rockets have won three in a row thanks to playing their best defense of the season. And just think how hard the rest of the team has to play defense when James Harden is doing this TAGEND

YannickYounique (@ Yannick_DYB) December 20, 2015

I know we say it all the time but James Harden is the worst defender ever pic.twitter.com/ e5mMkKiVtk

16. Charlotte Bobcats( 12 )

Just when we all guessed the Bobcats might finally be turning the corner, they ran and lost four of five to fall out of the top eight in the Eastern Conference. This is where a clever Internet person would insert the Jordan screaming meme.

17. Memphis Grizzlies( 13 )

The Grizzlies are showing signs that their new small-ball approach could pay off. Now they just have to perfect it to the point of besting the small-ball champ Warriors. Good luck, guys!

18. Washington Wizards( 20 )

John Wall dished out a career-high 19 shall take part in Mondays win over the Kings only to injury his ribs in the final minutes. This is your latest reminder that Washington D.C. sports cant ever win.

19. Utah Jazz( 18 )

The Jazz beat the Sun on Monday night, allowing them to retain the No. 8 place in the West at 12 -1 4. The Western Conference continues to make a strong suit that it is the new Eastern Conference.

20. Milwaukee Bucks( 21 )

Do the Bucks deserve to be in the Top 20? No, probably not. They lost by 18 to the Lakers a week ago, after all. But Milwaukee is the only team to beat the Warriors this season and with Golden State looking for revenge back on Friday, the Bucks had a 10 -point fourth one-quarter result!( Before ultimately losing by nine .) That deserves a trophy. Maybe even a parade. It at least deserves a place in the Top 20 of our power rankings , no matter how temporary.

21. New York Knicks( 20 ) 22. Denver Nuggets( 24 ) 23. Sacramento Kings( 26 ) 24. Phoenix Suns( 24 ) 25. Minnesota Timberwolves( 25 ) 26. Portland Trail Blazers( 22 ) 27. New Orleans Pelicans( 28 ) 28. Brooklyn Nets( 27 ) 29. Los Angeles Lakers( 29 ) 30. Philadelphia 76 ers( 30 )

Read more: www.theguardian.com

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