#tell me why when i’m sick the only thing i want is spencer reid?

[spencestiel-michelle]

*Spencer Reid lingers in the doorway*

Y/n: what’s the matter? you look like you’re struggling there, sailor. 

Reid, conflicted: i really want to kiss you goodbye but the cold you have is highly contagious and i would only be increasing my chances of contracting it and spreading it by initiating skin to skin contact. 

Y/n: you would also be kissing me goodbye- but you’re right, i get it, i’m too germ-ridden for my boyfriend to give me a quick forehead kiss goodbye, i’ll just have to wave from over he- 

*Spencer quickly kisses Y/n on the forehead and rapidly backs up and out of the door* 

*Spencer blushes and and terribly fights back a smile as he blatantly gushes over Y/n*

Y/n: was that so hard? 

Reid, bashfully: i will see you tomorrow. 

*Reid leaves*

Y/n, dreamily: i’m so gonna marry that man. 

[certaimromance]

𝜗𝜚 You Says.

Post prison Reid x Reporter!reader

Read part one here!

Summary: After a rough night and some misunderstandings, Spencer needs to do everything he can to make things right with you and get his relationship back on track. The problem is, things aren't so easy for you, and he's willing to do anything you ask, even take care of you when no one else will.

Words: 3,1k.

Warnings & Tags: mentions of crime and trauma. fem!reader. angst+comfort. reader gets sick (nothing serious, just a normal cold). second chance yep. english isn't my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).

Note: Ok, I didn't think of doing a second part before, but reading my own work made me so sad😭 the cat deserves happy parents (we are the cat) but I warn you that I do not believe in magic apologies.

♡ Enjoy! ♡

I. I Love You, I’m Sorry.

Spencer had been losing his mind since the last time he saw you in person, and it was all his fault. From the moment the door to his apartment closed behind you and the oven beeped, he began to feel the broken pieces of his heart that you had once held together unravel and shatter even more. He hated himself for letting his insecurities get in the way of the one good thing he had managed to have over the past few years, and for pushing you away when you didn't want to. You had been his exception among all the bad things that had happened in his life for as long as he could remember, the only one that didn't seem to want to be temporary and left him when he least expected it. And he himself had forced you out of his life, even when you didn't want to, begging him with tear-filled eyes for a little remorse that he didn't give you.

Just a few hours after the incident, he tried to go to work as if nothing had happened to clean up the mess the leak had made and put the killer in jail. He brought Penelope the promised cookies and your computer for her to examine because it felt right at the time. Part of him needed her to find real proof of your betrayal so he could stop feeling bad about making you cry and saying such ugly things to you.

Then he found out that you were telling the truth and that your computer contained nothing but photos of the two of you, all the articles he had ever written or been mentioned in your searches, and a few writings in which you poured out all your love for him in the cheesiest and most poetic way possible. You loved him, you really did, and there was no evidence to the contrary, because even Garcia could later assure him that the information had come anonymously and had been bought for five hundred dollars. But it was too late, because he had given you a conviction without even knowing it.

That's when he started to fixate on making amends for what he'd done. Every time you left work, bouquets of your favorite flowers with notes asking for forgiveness and wishing you a good night began to appear in your car. He also made a point of stopping by to talk to you and repeat how sorry he was. You knew this would happen when he realized his mistake. You had told him before you left, and that's why you refused to see him. It was good that the security guards at your workplace didn't let him in, even with his FBI credentials. The tricky part was your building because the doorman already knew him and let him in normally thanks to the excuses Spencer made up, even though you said a thousand times that he shouldn't have.

And that was happening again, for the fifth or sixth time in the last few days.

“Please, just let me talk to you and tell you how sorry I am. Listen to me for a moment.” You could hear Reid's voice from the other side of the door.

You didn't say anything. You just sat with your back against the door and one hand on your heart, as if you were trying to hold it. It didn't even cross your mind that he was in the same situation.

“Just a few minutes, please."

Once more, you remained silent.

Silence was the worst answer someone could give. You knew it, and it hurt to have to do it with him. But you had no choice because you knew that by looking into his eyes for just a few seconds, all the bad things would dissipate and maybe you would even forgive him without thinking just because of the love you had for him. You didn't like being this vulnerable and having so many feelings for someone who didn't trust you.

Lately, you've been spending every waking moment wondering what you could have done to make him believe that you were really capable of betraying him in such a cruel and selfish way. You were the one who woke up in the middle of the night to try to comfort him every time he had a nightmare or couldn't sleep. You drove to his apartment no matter what time it was to make sure he was okay. You lost your breath repeating that he was safe with you. You drank many cups of coffee the next day so you wouldn't fall asleep on the job every time the situation repeated itself. That's why you started sleeping in his apartment, wrapped in his arms because he said it made him happy to wake up and see you. And even with all that, Spencer was able to believe that you didn't love him.

You were running your hands through your hair and sighing, trying to block out all the thoughts running through your head, when you heard his phone ring. You could tell it was important by the way he spoke and changed his tone of voice, so you got up from the floor at the same time he did to put your ear to the door.

“I really have to go now, but could you open up a little bit so I can take a quick look at you?” He asked in a pleading tone after hanging up the call. “Please, I know you can hear me. I can see the shadow of your feet under the door.”

You really thought he didn't know you were there, feeling like a fool for listening to every word he said.

“If you want to see me, turn on the TV.” Your voice finally reached Spencer, and it gave him a glimmer of hope. It was the first time you had spoken to him since that night, and even though there was a door between the two of you, you were talking to him.

“It's not enough.”

“And it's not my problem.”

That was more hurtful than your silence.

“I know, it's mine.” He replied after a couple of seconds, trying to process everything. “And I will do everything I can to fix it...I have to go now, but take care of yourself. The nights have been getting colder lately, so wrap up warm.”

You knew it was a bit silly to think of that now, but his attention to detail was impressive. Since you did the evening news, you used to get off work very late, and the change from air conditioning to the city cold was quite a lot. Spencer had cited scientific studies to you many times to make you aware and know what kind of clothing materials to use to avoid a cold. You missed that a lot.

If he had the same attitude as the night of the conflict, it would be easier. You could hate him and stop loving him so strongly.

“I love you, William misses you and so do I.”

You frowned because you didn't know anyone by that name.

“William?”

“Our cat.” He answered simply. “When we talked about how we would name him, you said that a lot of people name their pets after their favorite characters. You love the movie ‘Notting Hill’ and whenever we watch it, you always say you like Hugh Grant's character named William. It also means strong-willed warrior. I just thought you would like it.”

You didn't say anything at the time because you had to cover your hand with your mouth to keep from doing so, but you liked it and you liked it too much. Once again, he focused on the details.

“You can change it if you want because I don't know if he likes it, but what I do know is that he misses you. He lies on your blanket and starts meowing, and he also looks at the door. I certainly think that every time I come home he expects it to be you.” He kept talking as he received no response from you. “It sounds like I'm talking about myself. And it's true because it happens to me the same way.”

When he paused, a tear escaped and fell down your cheek. It wasn't fair for him to say those things now.

“If you want to see him and me not being there, you can send me a message...but I'd really like to be.” He paused again, as if searching for the perfect words.

What did it cost him to have searched for the perfect words the night he distrusted you?

“I must go, I love you.”

The last thing you heard before he left was Spencer's footsteps heading towards the elevator.

II. I Miss You, I’m Sorry.

Just two weeks later, you realized that maybe you should have listened to Spencer when he said the nights were getting too cold. If you had, now you probably wouldn't be lying on your bed with an unbearable flu and no one there to bring you soup or a cold washcloth for your forehead because your mother was taking too long to get to city.

When you were younger, you thought it was a great idea to get as far away from your hometown as possible. Now, however, you realize that you need a familiar face to take care of you because you can't do it alone all the time.

You felt a sense of relief when you heard the door to your apartment open.

“Mom? I'm really hungry and the soup is all gone.” You spoke in a tired tone as you heard footsteps approaching. But at that moment, you watched as the cat you shared with Reid jumped onto the bed and started purring at you.

You thought you were hallucinating from the fever until you saw Spencer walking into your room with a couple of bags.

“I know you were expecting your mother, but we brought you soup and medicine.” He said, sitting up in bed to look closely at you and put a hand on your forehead. “You're burning up.”

“What are you doing here?” You asked, trying to pull away from his touch.

“Your mother called me because she couldn't find a flight today and was very worried. She asked me to take care of you.”

Of course she did, because she adored him and didn't know that things were bad between you two.

“I don't need you to take care of me.” You barely settled into bed and petted the cat. “Go to work, make sure no one leaks information.”

Oh, that was a low blow for him.

“I asked for a few days off because you have a high fever and someone needs to take care of you.”

“You don't have to...”

“I want to.” He said, interrupting you and putting a cold cloth on your forehead.

“Just because you're looking out for me doesn't mean I'm going to forget everything and forgive you.” You clarified right away, trying not to lose focus because of the relief you felt thanks to the cold compress.

“I know, and I don't expect you to. Just let me take care of you now, forget you hate me until you get better. I won't take advantage of this, I swear.” He looked at you with a serious gaze, as if he were swearing an oath. “Please.”

God, not puppy dog eyes now.

You used to love it when he looked at you with those sparkling eyes. Now, though, you felt manipulated by it.

“Fine, give me the soup.” You finally agreed, knowing you didn't have much of a choice. “Just a warning, please don't answer any calls near me. I can listen in and use the information to hire a nurse.”

He ignored the comment and didn't bring it up to make you uncomfortable. He sat on the edge of the bed, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. His touch was light, and his eyes searched yours as he spoke.

“Is there anything else besides soup I can bring you? More tissues, or maybe some medicine?” He asked in a soft, soothing voice.

You shook your head, still a bit dazed by the situation and your stomach rumbling. You watched as Spencer disappeared into the kitchen, and you could hear his footsteps echoing throughout the house, followed by the clatter of pots and pans and the sound of the stove being turned on. You could only lie back on your bed, feeling a wave of tiredness wash over you.

A few minutes later, he came back with a bowl of chicken noodle soup and sat down next to you on the bed, being careful not to spill anything.

“Are you planning to feed me soup?” You asked, with a hint of irony in your voice, as you watched me hold the spoon and watch you.

“If you wish, I'll be happy to.” He replied simply and brought the spoon gently to your mouth.

“I'm not a baby.”

Especially not his baby.

“You hate me, I know. But I really want to take care of you, and I won't leave until at least your mother arrives.” He paused for a second, as if to catch his breath. “If you don't want me around, that's okay, I'll just sit in the corner of the room or in the living room in silence. It hurts, but I'll take whatever you want.”

You remained silent for several seconds, dedicating yourself to stroking the cat to avoid Spencer's gaze.

“I don't hate you.” Was the only thing you could say at the time.

Something inside you was expecting a more exaggerated reaction for letting your guard down a bit, or maybe you were just too feverish. The thing was, he had only given you a small, almost non-existent smile.

“I know.” He finally spoke and gently adjusted the cold compress on your forehead. “And that's why I hate myself.”

At that moment, while you were trying to make sense of how things had changed so much in just a week, he was watching you.

Spencer was waiting for you to explode, to tell him how sorry you were for getting involved with him and his complicated world, that it was all one big mistake that you would regret forever. He was expecting disaster, pain, tears, and a lot of chaos.

But you didn't give him any of that.

Just a sweet nothing.

He could tell at that moment that even though you were in a feverish state and had many reasons to be cruel, you would not be. He realized that you would never yell at him or do anything to hurt him, that the most painful thing you could give him was your silence. And it was then that he confirmed that you loved him the way he thought he did not deserve to be loved: honestly and genuinely.

“Why?” You whispered after a few minutes of silence. “Why are you with me if you don't trust me?”

“I trust you.” He looked you straight in the eye as he spoke, trying to show that he was being completely sincere. “I just don't trust myself.”

You frowned and let out a groan from the discomfort in your forehead. You weren't sure if you were hallucinating because of the cold or if Spencer was really shivering.

“I don't think I'm good enough for you, or deserve you, or that you love me because you want to.” He finally admitted, his voice slightly shaky. He seemed to be in a worse state than you. “It's silly because you've never given me a reason to distrust you.”

“I know you thought I was going to leave. But I didn't want to leave until you asked me to.” You were close to crying, so you pretended to sneeze to hide your watery eyes. You didn't want to show how vulnerable you were. “It was easier to distrust me and blame me like I was just another bad person you catch.”

“Yes, but...” He replied, trying to answer your question.

“Don't talk. It's my turn.”

He nodded after a few seconds, watching you with concern. “Just be careful, you're still sick.”

You already knew how sick you were and how deplorable you probably looked, but you wanted to say it all and stop feeling a lump in your throat.

“You say you trust me, but you really don't, and I've been trying to understand you for almost a year, Spencer. It's been eleven months of trying not to invade your space, avoiding topics that make you tense or your eyes glaze over.” You had to stop to catch your breath and drink some water with his help. “And you think I don't understand you or really know you, but I do. I know how all your dishes are arranged, I know how you like to fold clothes and eat toast, I know that chess reminds you of someone because your eyes get watery every time we see a board, I know about the book signed by Maeve that you hide in your closet and about which you tense up every time I'm near, I know about your nightmares about prison that you don't like to talk about, and about your mother's favorite colors that change every day. I know so much about you, and yet you think I know nothing.”

Once more, there was a long, quiet pause.

“I'm so sorry.” He held your hands as he repeated the same thing, this time with a truly sincere tone. The whole room was still tense as his knees touched the floor, and the apology he gave you seemed like a plea. “I'm really sorry. I know you don't want apologies, you want trust, and I'm going to show you that.”

You didn't say anything as he sat down next to you on the bed.

“I trust you, that's why I always tell you about my cases. And I will tell you about all my past, if you want, because for me you are my present and my future...of course, only if you still want to.”

The eyes of both of you were fixed on the cat you shared, who was purring and lying very comfortably in the middle of the bed. It was nice to know that at least one of the three of you was happy.

“Tell me.”

And just as you asked, he told you everything because he wanted to show you that he trusted you.

This time he really trusted.

[fxllfaiiry]

─ hits different 'cause it's you

★ pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader

★ summary: spencer reid is used to being called pretty boy by everyone ─ everyone but you.

★ warnings: fluff, spencer and the reader acting like lovesick teens, co-workers to lovers, the team teasing spencer.

★ notes: I had this saved in my drafts for a long time and finally thought why not post it?? please don't mind any errors, english is not my first language.

Spencer Reid likes a lot of things. He likes books, he likes jello, but most importantly, he likes you. He could talk about you for hours, in fact, if he was given the chance to, he would. Spencer was mesmerized by everything you did, he was hopelessly, utterly, in love with you.

“Pretty boy, what are you dreaming about?” Derek’s voice jolted him out of his bubble, he looked around embarrassed remembering he was in fact surrounded by his co-workers. Everyone in the jet turned to look at him, everyone including you. Sitting next to you was making him nervous.

“Um, nothing. I was just thinking about, stuff?” He somehow magically managed to stutter out a full sentence under your gaze, god he felt pathetic.

“Reid, are you asking us or telling us?” Hotch asked looking amused.

Spencer could feel your gaze set on him, he really hoped you couldn't see how red his cheeks are. “I - I’m telling you, yeah.” How was the smartest person in the room suddenly, the dumbest?

“Come on, give pretty boy a break,” Rossi smiled. Rossi had a sixth sense when it comes to these things, he knew about Spencer’s feelings from day one, it was obvious to almost everyone, but of course not to you.

You were equally in love with him, but you would never tell Spencer that, you couldn't bare the rejection. If only you knew how smitten he was with you. You stared at his face, marvelling at how pretty he looked, oh how you would kill for those lips to be on yours.

“Was pretty boy dreaming about a pretty girl?” Emily teased. What? No. Picturing Spence with other girls made you want to throw up. If you were paying more attention rather than drowning in jealousy, you’d have noticed Spencer’s eyes darting towards you.

“Come on pretty boy, tell us who the girl is.” Curiosity was killing you, who was the lucky lady that caught Spencer Reid’s eye?

Spencer froze, you called him pretty boy? He isn't used to that at all, you usually call him Spence or boy genius, but never pretty boy. ‘Please call me that again,’ he thought to himself.

“You think I’m pretty?” The question slipped past his lips before he could stop himself. That was everyone’s queue to stop listening, they all rushed back into their conversations wanting to give you guys some privacy.

“What? Of course, I think you’re pretty, Spence.” Where did this come from all of a sudden? You thought he was the prettiest boy, you would tell him that every day if you had to.

“I mean - It’s just you never call me that…” He tried to hide his nervous state by letting out a chuckle. He almost felt sad, why didn't you call him pretty boy? He wants to be your pretty boy desperately.

You on the other hand had no idea why you didn't call him that. Note: call Spencer Reid pretty boy more often.

“Well, I’m sorry, I’ll call you pretty boy more often if you want?” Where did that sudden wave of confidence come from?

“Oh, I would like that,” Spencer mumbled. He tried to keep the smile off his face but it was useless. This feeling was better than reading with his cardigan on, on a cosy rainy day.

“You’re the prettiest boy I know, Spence. My pretty boy.” The last part was so quiet Spencer would’ve missed it if he wasn't paying attention, but fortunately, he’s always paying attention to you.

“I think you’re the prettiest too.” The two of you were acting like love-sick teenagers, but what the hell, screw that.

“Would you like to go on a date with me once we get back, Spence?” You were beaming, after years of waiting, you finally got what you wanted, and the new surge of confidence certainly helped.

“I’d love that.”

bonus !

“Garcia owes me 20 bucks” Derek whispered watching the scene unfold.

[jjtheresidentbaby]

Omg why did I just notice that your name is jj too 😭. I’m sorry for spamming you with ideas but I just have to ask about this one too. What about a classification au with caregiver!Spencer’s bringing little!reader into the BAU for a day and the entire team trying to talk to and hold the reader but they’re too shy to leave Spencer’s arms except for hotch because he just gives off safe dad vibes ( I have no other way to describe it😭)?

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ meeting ໒꒱ ⋆ﾟ⊹

|| spencer reid x reader

a/n: safe dad vibes from hotch is so real of you

warnings: anxiety, pet names

-

Spencer’s anxiety is especially high as he walks the stairs in the bullpen towards the table room. You’re sat on his hip happily, chewing on the necklace he bought you for trips out in public when you couldn’t have a teether out.

Logically Reid knows he has nothing to be nervous about, the team is a group of caregivers and flips, and they’re all supportive when Jj slips around them as she’s one of the flips. This should be fine he tells himself, hoisting you closer to his chest as he presses the wood door open.

The team is standing around waiting, knowing they’d be meeting you today and all very excited. When Reid surveys the room over he notes that Garcia must’ve baked as there’s a plate of cookies and cupcakes on the table, there’s also a small basket of toys Jj must’ve brought, and a stack of blankets Morgan definitely brought as they’re the same ones he keeps in his go-bag for any little they run into on a case. It eases Spencer to know that his team put thought into bringing things along to meet you, it’s sweet.

“Hi guys.” You don’t move from your spot tucked into Reid as he greets each member of the team.

They’re cooing and awing at you, it’s making your cheeks flush pink with all the attention. Reid of course notices and that only spurs him on to try and get you to interact with the team. Your head peaks up after the small reassuring murmur Spencer gives you, just low enough that only you can hear him saying everything will be fine. You hadn’t seemed nervous on the ride over or on the walk into the room but Reid suspects having all eyes on you can be a bit intimidating.

“Hi sweetie, it’s nice to meet you.” Garcias grin is wider than wide, her hand is extended as she crouches a bit to be at your eye level. You grip tighter at Spencer’s sweater, tucking your face back into him with red cheeks. It makes the team smile with a couple comments about how cute you are.

“They’re pretty shy, reminds me of when we saw Jj regressed for the first time.” Morgan gets a jab in the side from Jj but the blonde nods, Spencer hopes that tonight goes over with less tears than seeing Jj little for the first time did.

“They’re just attached to Reid, they’ll come around eventually.” Hotch comments and Reid makes an effort not to look down at you as your head turns to look at Aaron. Spencer had expected you to cling around Morgan or Garcia, they’re usually who littles want to go to on cases, but Hotch doesn’t seem to be bothered by your eyes gluing themselves to him.

Conversations start to flow, talks of weekend plans and banter over past jokes, it’s comfortable enough for you to watch the team. Hotch glances at you every now and then, a small smile on his lips each time, and eventually you get sick of only being held by Spencer. You tug on Reid’s sweater before he’s ceasing his chuckling to look down at you, grinning wildly when your arms outstretch towards Hotch.

Aaron takes no time at all to scoop you up and let you latch around him. It’s a different feel than when Spencer holds you. There’s no smell of old books, no knitting of his sweater to lean against and instead your cheek finds Hotchs suit jacket. It’s smooth, obviously well taken care of and ironed out, you like it.

“Guess we know who their favorite is.” Derek grumbles but there’s no real malice in it, only a teasing tone and soft look at you and Hotch.

[ponzien]

- It Takes Two

Summary: You’re, put simply a catch. However when you find out another woman has his baby you lose it.

Pairing: prison!spencer x sweetheart!reader

Category: Angst (Happy End eventually)

Y/N

All good things come to an end. I knew it would be my turn soon.

“And you swear it’s his..?” I asked, tears welling up in my eyes. “Yeah…I’m sorry you had to find out like this…” the short brown haired woman frowned, caressing my hand softly as she looked at me.

“But how?” My voice cracked. “Well it was before he got arrested, in Mexico, I’d known him for quite a while before that.” Cat said with a frown. “I understand… thank you.” I began to sob into my hands.

“Seriously, you seem like a lovely girl, how long have you been dating?” She raised a brow. I wiped my tears and almost shrugged. “About 7 months… if I’d known he had a girlfriend who was pregnant nonetheless I wouldn’t have ever…”

“It’s finee, I know how it is, I just want him to be around for his kid even if it means co parenting.” Cat said. I looked up a bit confused. “You’re staying with him?” I questioned. “Well yeah but only for the baby, you wouldn’t want them to grow up without their daddy right?” She frowned and placed two hands on her belly. “Of course not! I’m sorry” I panicked.

“You’re all good, im really sorry this happened to you though” Cat shook her head. “I’m sorry too, i have to go to work but I’ll be grabbing the last of my things soon. I havent seen him in a while so I’ll probably not see you either, I wish you a healthy pregnancy” I bowed politely and left.

___

The feeling of vomit in my throat burned. I hurled over the toilet wondering what was wrong with me. Then the idea hit me. It couldn’t be. Positive. I was shocked. I curled up into a ball crying for hours until I decided to confront him.

I’d have to go to his work, with a positive test in hand and a heavy heart I walked to my car and drove off to the BAU. The entire ride was silent as I thought about what to say before ultimately deciding that I’d let it unfold when I got there.

____

“Hello, I need to speak with Doctor Spencer Reid.” I said to a group of his co workers. “Uhm who are you?” The blonde said almost defensively. “His…well his now ex girlfriend but I really need to speak with him.” I tried to look past them. “Hold on girlfriend? When did you guys start dating?” An older man asked.

“About 7 months ago…why?” I raised a brow. “He never told us he had a girlfriend…” The one I knew as Penelope stated. “Fucking fantastic, I’m glad he’s good at lying to you guys too.” I said defeated, almost crying. “What do you mean?” An older woman asked, young I suppose but a few greys sticking out.

“I’ll tell you what I mean first he doesn’t tell you guys about me or anyone for that matter and now not only am I pregnant but another bitch out there has his baby too!” I sobbed, leaning against the blonde who immediately comforted me.

“What do you mean? Who else is pregnant?!” The older woman asked. “Cat…that’s what she said her name was, she’s in prison but everything matches up and…” I sniffled. “Me and Spencer took a break almost 3 months ago and now…I’m pregnant and..” I sobbed harder into the blonde’s chest.

“Ma’am I need you to listen to me, Cat is a convicted hit woman who’s after Spencer, this could be the connection we need to get him out so I need you to tell me everything.” The blonde said.

“What do you mean get him out?! Where is he?!” I panicked. “He’s in prison because he was framed.” The older man said. “Oh my…I’m so stupid I should’ve checked on him and…oh my god I’m gonna be sick!” I clutched my stomach and vomited a bit in my mouth.

“It’s okay, breathe, thanks to you we can get him out and you’ll work things out, I’m Jennifer alright?” Jennifer hummed as she got on her knees in front of me as I sat down. “But what about Cat…” I asked.

“No matter what happens I need you to know…that it wasn’t his choice.” Her voice cracked as I hurled on the floor. “They…did she..?” I whispered. Jennifer nodded. “No matter how it happened Spencer wasn’t..conscious or mentally aware of it.”

“And I was judging him and wanting to…oh god am I a bad person…I’m a bad mother too! I can never-“ I cried harder as Jennifer interrupted. “No, listen, you’re an amazing person and you’ll be a great mom, she’s good at getting into people’s heads. Just hang in there.” She assured me.

“I can try..”

___

“Hey, Y/N…look” Emily whispered to me with a large smile as Spencer walked out of the elevator. “Spence!” I gasped as I ran over to hug him. He hugged me tightly as if trying to make sure I was real. “It’s okay…why didn’t you have someone tell me…” I cried into his shoulder. “I’m sorry I didn’t want you know until my name was cleared… it’s selfish I know and-“ I cut him off. “Never mind it’s irrelevant.”

“Can we show him?!” Penelope squealed. I nodded as she brought out a glittery sign we made together to pass the time. “Open the little door” I smiled, hands over my mouth as I waited. “What’s this…” He asked skeptically as he opened it and began to slowly smile.

“You’re serious?” He asked. I nodded. “Like really positive?” I felt the light return to his eyes for a second as I nodded again. “This is-“ He hugged me tight and spun my around. “Thank You so much Y/N”

“Hey it’s not just me it takes two you know?”

[thatgirlstrawberry]

Sick Surprise pt. 13 - Something Old and New pt. 1

I’m which it’s the days before the wedding!

Warnings: fluff! Drunk Y/N, mentions of smut, cursing, lmk if I missed anything!

Spencer Reid x fem!reader

The Bachelorette Party

Y/N squealed as Penelope came around with another round of cotton candy shots. “Okay! Let’s bring out the presents!” The bubbly blonde squeaked.

The woman gasped. “No way! You guys didn’t have to get me presents!” JJ and Emily sat on the opposite sides of her with four bags in their hands each. Penelope sat in the chair in front of her with about five in hers and a two of Y/N’s work friends sat in the surrounding chairs.

She smiled after picking up a little shot glass and down the sour liquid. “Yes we did! You’re getting married, and in two of these bags are for your honeymoon.” Emily winked. Y/N’s body heated and she giggled.

“Whatever! I’m gonna go with the least risky bag.” She looked at JJ and held her hand out. “Bag me, sexy.” The drinks must have really been getting to her.

JJ handed her a bag and she excitedly tapped her heels on the ground. She reached inside and felt something silky and smooth. She furrowed her brows and pulled it out.

It was a white robe all wrapped up neat and pretty with a blue bow. “Awww, JJ! This so so cute!” She gasped. On the back of the robe it said Mrs. Reid and their wedding date.

“I thought it would be cute to wear for photos and on the honeymoon.” She shrugged with a smile. Y/N leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Okay open my next one!”

Y/N grabbed the bag that was shoved I to her hands and reached inside. She rolled her eyes with a smile when’s he felt the lace on her fingers. She pulled it out and widened her eyes at the white lacy set with REID sewn on the front over the crotch.

“Are you guys trying to get him to break my vagina?” She asked, giggling and showing everyone the garment.

The women hollered and squealed as a song they all recognized came on. “Okay!” Y/N hopped up from her chair. “We’ll resume this after we dance!”

.•.•.•.•.•.•.

The Bachelor Party

Spencer begged the guys not to take him to a strip club or anywhere where he could see some other girl’s… body parts. He didn’t want that on his conscience when he said I Do in 48 hours.

So, they ended up in Rossi’s backyard with beers and a ping pong table. Hotch was currently beating Rossi’s ass at the game and Morgan and Spencer were watching.

“So… have you asked her yet?” Derek asked after a sip of beer.

Spencer sighed and shook his head. “N-no.”

Derek tilted his head. “Why not?”

The man took a sip of his beer and cleared his throat. “I just—“ He sighed and shook his head. “I’m scared she’ll say no.”

The other man chuckled. “Well, you don’t know if you don’t ask.” He shrugged.

Spencer rolled his eyes. “I just— we only been together for a year and 10 months. I have no idea if she’s ready to let me adopt Eloise.”

He hummed and clicked his tongue. “Didn’t you tell me that she said you were great with her? And thy she told you that you don’t need to ask her permission to let Eloisey do things. And you accidentally called her your daughter and… Y/N didn’t even flinch.”

Spencer nodded. “You’re right. I’m totally just over thinking it.”

“Reid!” Rossi called. He snapped out of his conversation with Derek and looked at the smiling man. “Get over here and have some fun or I’m taking you to get drunk!”

Spencer looked at Derek with a smile before he rolled his eyes and got up from his chair.

The Bachelorette Party

In total, Y/N had received 15 sets of lingerie. She was thankful but also a little worried for her body. She also got a blue pendant necklace that all of the BAU girls pitched in for her ‘something blue’.

After all of the presents, the party was over. Emily and JJ were trying to keep Y/N upright while walking to the can and Penelope was holding all of the presents.

It was a good idea to schedule the party two days before the wedding because there was no doubt that she’d wake up with a massive hangover.

“Where’s m’kid?” She slurred. Emily groaned when Y/N almost slipped in a puddle of water on the sidewalk.

“She’s with Hotch’s babysitter.” She nodded. “Remember? With Jack and Henry.”

“Ooooooohhhhhh.” Y/N nodded with a giggle. She leaned into Emily. “Can I tell you a secret?” She asked loudly, thinking that she was whispering.

“Sure…?” Emily gave a look to JJ.

Y/N laughed. “Eloisey’s got a crush on JJ’s kid!” She doubled over and stomped her foot.

Penelope sighed. “It’s gonna be hilarious to see Reid trying to deal with his drunk Mrs!” She laughed.

Y/N almost spun around completely. “Shhh! He won’t know I’m drunk, ‘nelope! So don’t say any words, m’kay!?”

The bubbly blonde nodded. “Oh… of course not!”

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Spencer and the guys had ended up going to a bar because Derek believed that a bachelor party should be more fun than it was.

So, they all loaded up in cars and went to the nearest one. Spencer had one drink and wanted to leave because he knew that Y/N would be getting home soon from her party.

He asked Rossi to drive him home and he waited for her to get home. When she did get home, he didn’t expect her to be as absolutely wasted as she was.

The door flew open and Emily groaned when Y/N ripped her arms out of her and JJ’s hands. She stumbled inside the apartment, her eyes landing on Spencer who was reading a book. “Spencer!” She gasped. “Oh my gosh! What are you doing here!?”

Spencer stood up, glancing at Emily, JJ, and then Garcia. “I live here, baby.” He chuckled, walking towards her. “How much did you drink?” He asked, mainly talking to Emily and the other girls.

JJ sighed. “Eight shots of vodka and four ‘zombies’.” She snorted.

Spencer furrowed his brows as he walked forward to take his fiancé from them. “What’s a zombie?” He asked.

Y/N giggled. “It’s a loooooooot of alcohol.” She nodded, wrapping her arms around his neck and going limp in his arms. “Where’s my other baby?” She asked, nuzzling into his chest.

He reached down, grunting and grabbing her ankle to take off her high heels. “She— jeez— she’s with Jack and Henry and then your mom is going to pick her up from Hotch’s house.”

Y/N whimpered a bit. “But I wanna…” She paused and sighed. “I wanna see her…”

Spencer nodded as he struggled to take her other heel off. “I know baby. You’ll see her tomorrow!” He smiled, kissing her cheek.

“Are you okay here, Reid?” Garcia asked, hearing the woman sing horribly into his chest as he took off her heel.

He tossed her shoe behind him onto the couch. “Yeah, we’re okay! Thank you for taking care of her.” He smiled.

Garcia took all of the bags and walked towards the coat closet. “You don’t get to look in these bags, Mister. Understand?” She opened the door and shoved them inside.

Y/N nodded against him. “Yeah, Mr. Vagina wizard! No looking!” She patted his chest and slurred her giggles.

“Okay, I won’t look.” He blushed madly at her drunken words as he ignored the laughs coming from his coworkers.

The girls said their goodbyes to the drunk woman and Spencer and left. Y/N was mumbling nonsense to Spencer and he sat her down on the couch and left to the kitchen to get her a glass of water.

“How was y- your parrrrtyyy?” She asked, her head rolling backwards onto the back of the couch.

Spencer chuckled and walked back into the living room. “It was good. Not as good as your though, apparently.”

Y/N shook her head and then frowned all of the sudden. “Did you… did y’see any… boobs?” She asked, opening her eyes just a bit.

The man shook his head and sat down next to her. “No. I didn’t see any.”

“Any butts?”

“Nope.”

“Mr. Chocolate didn’t take you to see any strippers?” She asked, sitting up and grabbing his shoulders.

Spencer shook his head. “No strippers.” She smiled at this and laid her head into his chest. “You gotta get to bed, okay?” He patted her back twice and then leaned her upright.

“Whyyyyyyy?” She whined, trying to poke his face. He moved away once but saw that she was persistent so let her do what she was trying to do.

Spencer smiled. “Because tomorrow you have Eloisey pick up, your nail appointment, your dress pick up, your eyebrow appointment, and then something else but you won’t tell me what it is.”

She giggled and bit her lip. “I’m getting a Brazilian wax!” She pretty much slapped his chest in excitement.

He rolled his eyes with a smile and stood up, bringing her with him. “Then, we have our rehearsal and dinner with everyone. Will you go to bed, please?” He chuckled.

“Can I have a kiss, please?” She asked, closing her eyes and puckering her lips.

“Yes.” He leaned down and kissed her shortly. He pulled away.

“That was not a very good kiss, mister.” She shook her head.

Spencer rubbed across her cheeks bone with his thumb. “I’ll give you a better one when you wake up, okay?” She smiled and nodded.

“Will you go to bed with me? I wanna cuddle you.” She whispered.

“Of course, baby.”

It took five whole minutes to get to the bedroom, Y/N was hard to control. She kept trying to slow dance with him in the middle of the floor. At one point he did because she started crying saying, “it’s rehearsal for our first dance! You have two left feet!”

Once he got her into bed, he stripped her of her dress and put some pajama pants and one of his shirts on her. He tied her hair back and away from her face because he knew how much she hated her hair getting in her way while she was sleeping.

She was very happy when he finally laid down next to her after changing from his clothes because that meant she could practically lay on top of him. “Missed you, Spence.” She whispered after hiding her face in the crook of his neck.

He rubbed her head before running his hand down her back. “I missed you too, baby.”

“Hey guess what, Spence,”

“What?”

“You’re really hot.”

He just laughed and shushed her.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

The next morning, Y/N woke up to a bottle of water and a few advil on her bedside table. She groaned and rolled over expecting to see her fiancé there looking angelic as always when he was sleeping.

But he wasn’t there.

She furrowed her eyebrows and felt the dull aching of her head become stronger. “Ohhhhhhhhh fuck.” She sighed, groaning loudly.

She sat up and let her head fall into her hands. She stilled for a moment before realizing that her room was a bit too lit up.

She looked over at the clock on her table.

10:30 am

She was supposed to pick Eloise up from her mother’s at 9:00.

“Shit!” She stumbled out of bed and raced out of her bedroom.

She almost ran to the front door but paused when she saw Spencer cooking something in the kitchen and Eloise was dancing around the living room.

Spencer looked up from the frying pan. “Good morning— I uh… didn’t expect you to be up yet.” He said, ducking down to look at the clock on the stove.

“Morning mommy!” Eloise squealed.

She smiled down and squinted at her daughter. “Morning, baby!” She said quietly. “Did you…” She looked up at Spencer.

He nodded. “I didn’t want to wake you so I just went to get her and now I’m making you guys breakfast.”

Y/N crossed her arms and smiled as she walked towards him. “You’re the best. And I love you.” She mumbled.

He grinned, holding his arms out. She walked into them and squeezed him so tight. “How drunk was I?” She asked.

“Verrry drunk.” He kissed her head. “You forced me to slow dance with you.” He chuckled.

Y/N giggled and inhaled his familiar scent. Coffee, and cologne. “Thank you.”

“For what?” He asked, rubbing her back.

“For being you.” She answered after a short pause.

Spencer smiled. “Well, I’ll always be me. But, you’ve got to eat and then get ready for all of your appointments today.”

“Spenther! Is bweakfast weady!?” Eloise asked from the living room. “I’m a very hungry girl, otay?”

Spencer chuckled. “Yes, it’s ready. Do you wanna come and sit in your chair?”

Eloise pattered into the kitchen. “Duh, Spenther.” She rolled her eyes and climbed up on the pink chair.

Y/N smiled and shook her head. “Are you excited to have a girls day with mommy?” She asked, sitting in the chair next to her as Spencer began plating the food.

“Yeth! I so excited to get my nails done wif you!” She nodded, eyes lighting up. She paused. “Wait. I dotta go wash m’hands!” She scurried out of the kitchen to the bathroom.

Spencer leaned over his fiancé’s shoulder. “So, what’s she gonna do when you’re getting your… Brazilian?” He whispered. She could feel his smirk against her ear.

She turned to him, lips centimeters apart. “How did you know about that!?” She asked, watching him set a plate down in front of her.

He kissed her, leaving her head a bit dizzy. “Let’s just say, you like to overshare when you drink.” He whispered against her lips. She chased after his lips as he pulled away but he got too far and she pouted, turning around and picking up her fork.

Eloise rushed back into the kitchen and sat in her pink chair, excited to eat.

Y/N cleared her throat. “She will be with Penelope, for your information.”

Spencer smiled and sat across from her. “Oh, in that case, can I come watch?”

She furrowed her brows. “I really don’t think you wanna see hair getting ripped off my va-jay-jay.” She shook her head and Spencer laugh loudly, almost startling Eloise.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

The day went absolutely perfect. Eloise and Y/N had gotten their nails painted, Eloise played with another little girl while her mother was getting her eyebrows done, Penelope picked up Eloise and took her for ice cream while Y/N was getting her soul snatched with hot wax and now, the mother and daughter pair were on their way to pick up their dresses. They got them and then she and Eloise went out to lunch. She wanted to explain what was going to change around the house and who she would be staying with after the wedding.

She watched her daughter with a smile as she munched on her chicken strips. “So, Eloisey…” She started. The girl looked up. “Remember when I told you what getting married was?” She asked.

Eloise nodded and her eyes out up. “It means that I get to wear a pretty dwess and frow fwowers at people.”

Y/N’s head titled to the side. “Yeah, somethin’ like that.” She giggled. “Spencer and I are going to go on a little trip. Just for a couple of days.”

Eloise looked up. “Where we goin’?” She asked, almost biting her finger in the process of eating.

The mother sighed and reached across the table. “Baby, you… you aren’t going.” She shook her head. She couldn’t find any nicer words. “I’m sorry, baby. You’ll get to stay with grandma and grandpa.” Her shoulders tensed.

Eloisey face screwed up into anger. “I wan’ go, mommy!” She shouted.

“Eloise, you can’t go.” Y/N said quietly after shushing her. The girl sat back, crossing her arms. “It’s for three days, baby. I promise I’ll call you every single day we’re gone and I’ll even bring you back a present!”

The girl’s face lit up. “I wike pwesents, mommy.” She nodded.

Y/N smiled. “I know you do, baby.”

——————————————————

Yayyyyyyy

I live this chapter and I’m sooooooo excited for the next chapter which will be the wedding! I decided to break it up into 2 parts

Thank y’all for reading and I love ya bunches❤️❤️❤️

Taglist: @tuesday-yellowxx

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[ssa-jet]

Dredging Up the Past❤️‍🩹

a part two to Everyone’s Replaceable

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Black!Fem!Reader (FBI Agent), Reader x BAU

Relationship: passive-aggressive, a little hostile at first

Category: angst to semi-fluff

Summary: the sequel to Everyone’s Replaceable in which Y/N L/N is reunited with her former team members, the B.A.U., but not in the way you’d expect…

Content Warnings: hospital,cursing, mentions of crimes against children, implication of kidnapping— lmk if I missed anything<3

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

It’s been seven months since my outburst at the B.A.U.. I would be lying if I said that I didn’t miss the chemistry that seemed to radiate off of my conversations with my former coworkers, but working away from them has been a refreshing experience.

After JJ turned in my resignation sticky note, Hotch immediately called me and asked me to explain the reason as to why I acted the way I did. Without a second thought, I listed off everything the doctors told me, even suggesting that I turn in a copy of my visitation logs to prove I wasn’t lying. I guess he believed me, because he allowed me to transfer into the Crimes Against Children Unit.

It’s still in Virginia, but a fresh start is a fresh start.

As I walk into the office building, my eyes trace over the text Katie sent me a little over an hour ago, insisting that I come into work on my day off to assist in a huge case that would require the attention of another unit. My shiny heels click across the floor as I approach a group of people standing around a case board. From the back, they look familiar, but once they turn around, my brain shuts down.

The B.A.U.

I almost want to kick myself for standing there and staring, mouth agape, looking like an idiot, but my brain can’t seem to string together any sentences to express how I feel right now— mainly because I don’t know what I feel.

Seven months is a long time to hang onto something, and, while I forgive them, I can’t forget what they did, How they made me feel. The only thing I remember feeling on my first day back at the office was unbridled rage.

I don’t even realize I’m still staring until Morgan clears his throat. “Hi, Y/N,” he says, voice barely above a whisper. “I-I… what? How?” My mind races a mile a minute as I stutter out my response. “Why, Katie? Why didn’t you tell me they were coming?!” The distress and horror in my voice causes Katie’s brows to furrow in contemplation. “I’m sorry, Y/N. We were getting nowhere and I had to make the call.” “That doesn’t mean you couldn’t have told me!” I fire back, oblivious to the fact that my former colleagues are still present. “Y/N,” Katie says sternly. “Now’s not the time. Let’s save this conversation for another time, yeah?” “Fine.” I place my bag on the conference table and cross my arms.

“It’s nice to see you all again,” I lie, plastering a fake smile to my face. “It’s been, what, seven months, 3 weeks, and nineteen days?” JJ raises her eyebrows at me. “Hi, Y/N,” Emily says, going in for a handshake that I politely reciprocate, making a mental note to wash my hands as soon as possible. To be honest, I didn’t think I’d still be angry after all this time, but the urge to be petty is creeping up into my chest and making it impossible to stay polite. I shake hands with everyone except Spencer, and for once, I’m glad he’s a germaphobe— he’s been here an hour and I’m already sick of him.

The case seems to drag on— no new leads, clues, locations, or names. The downside to this is that it means spending more time with Spencer, whom I’m trying to build a geological profile with. “All of these girls are being found here,” I say, using a red marker to mark each of the locations the girls were found. “We have more than enough locations to build a geographical profile, and yet, we’ve come up with nothing.” The frustration leaks into my tone as I talk aloud. A geographical profile is always easier to build when you’re not-technically-an-ex ex boyfriend is looking over you. “That’s because the locations are too spread out to narrow it down without having too many variables,” Spencer’s smart-ass mouth replies. Every word that comes out of his mouth only makes me want to punch him, hard. “I know that, genius,” I scoff. “I’m just trying to help you,” he says, turning to look at me. “Like you did when I was in the hospital?” The retort slips out of my mouth before my brain can register what I said, and by the time it does, my heart is racing so fast I feel like I could pass out. Spencer’s jaw falls open just a little, allowing me to bask in the sudden glory that came from rendering the smart mouth speechless.

“How’s your girlfriend?” I ask, abandoning the case board to glare at him. “What’s her name? I’m thinking it was Y/N, since you couldn’t tell the fucking difference.” For the first time in seven months, I get a good, long look at Spencer. His hair is neatly gelled to the side so that a section is hanging in front of his eye, and he’s just as cleanly shaven as I remember him to be. His big, brown eyes lost their familiar spark after I ended up in the hospital— I only remember because my good friend Penelope told me all about it. Spencer’s slightly chapped, pink lips are sucked into his teeth as he struggles to form an answer to my statement. “What’s wrong?” I tease, bathing in the embarrassed look on his face. “All those words in your brain and you can’t figure out what to say to me?”

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

I almost laugh at how quiet his voice sounds. “Really?” I ask. “‘Cause that’s not what it looked like to me.”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Spencer repeats.

“Whatever,” I scoff again. “Where is she, anyway?”

“She quit,” he mumbles.

Now that revelation causes me to laugh. “I’m happy for her,” I admit through giggles. “At least she managed to save herself.” Something inside of Spencer snaps, because his eyes darken and his expression turns cold. “God, you’re such a-a…” he stutters, clearly holding back his annoyance. The innocent, sweet boy I had left behind wouldn’t have dared to yell at me, so I’m intrigued as to what he has to say. “Such a what?” I taunt, a grin on my face. “A child,” Spencer snaps.

Oh.

I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t surprised that he actually insulted me. Luckily for me and unfortunately for him, his little comment fails to faze me. If anything, it eggs me on. “Now that’s more like it,” I tell him. “What else have you got, or is that it? Poor baby can’t even get a word out.”

What he says next isn’t at all what I expected to hear.

“Wanna know the real truth as to why I couldn’t see you?!” Spencer exclaims, chest heavily rising and falling with each angry inhale. “Sure,” I reply. “Other than to cheat.” “I didn’t cheat on you, Y/N! Would you stop saying that?!” “Just tell me why you didn’t come see me,” I say, ignoring his request. “I don’t have all fucking day.” “My mom’s schizophrenia worsened and none of the medications were helping!” My heart stops. If there’s one thing I always loved in the world, it was Diana Reid— the most light-hearted, kindest soul on the planet. Spencer doesn’t even wait for a response before he continued. “I had to fly back to Vegas to check on her, and it was so bad to the point where, even if you told her to, she wouldn’t remember to eat!” Something warm and foreign fills my eyes before I even get the chance to register what they are.

Tears.

A single one slips down my cheek at his confession, and as he continues, they don’t stop. “We tried every medication— everything— and it wasn’t working. Y/N, believe me when I say that I thought about you every day. I wouldn’t have left you on life support on purpose, I swear to God. I loved you so much, Y/N. More than you think.” Spencer’s knuckles are white from being balled up into angry fists that reside at his sides, and through my blurry tears, I can tell he’s crying, too. My body, like a magnet, finds itself tangled up in a confusing, comforting hug as we cry together in front of a case board with pictures full of scared children. It feels so unfamiliar and strange to be hugging the man who broke my heart, but I can’t bring myself to pull away, even if I wanted to. “I-I…” Fuck. Now it’s me who doesn’t know what to say. “God, Spencer, I’m so sorry, I… I don’t know, I just— fuck, I…I don’t know what to feel anymore.” And it’s true. Resentment for my ex boyfriend has been flushed out of my system and replaced by another weird feeling, one I can’t fully place a finger on. “It’s okay,” he shuffles, still clinging to me like a lanky koala. “I should’ve told you.”

“It’s your private business,” I tell him “You don’t have to tell anybody.”

“We had been dating for so long that you had a right to know,” he points out.

That’s the keyword— had. Now that the air has been cleared of leftover hatred, I genuinely don’t know how to feel about Spencer anymore. We’re just two broken people who managed to find each other again. “What about the rest of the team?” I ask as we separate, sniffling and wiping stray tears from our sticky cheeks. “I can’t speak for them,” Spencer replies. His words bestow a blanket of silence upon the conference room, leaving us staring at our shoes like little kids who’ve just been scolded.

“What happens now?” I ask.

“I don’t know,” Spencer admits.

No words can fit the predicament I’ve found myself in. Part of me knows that I shouldn’t have to apologize for the rightful outburst I had months ago, but I can’t help but feel guilty that Spencer was harboring all this pain while we were dating, and he didn’t think to tell me.

“I could’ve helped” I finally say.

“How?”

“I don’t know! Emotional support, maybe?”

Spencer laughs dryly and sits down. “We, uh, we better get back to the geographical profile,” he says, motioning to the barely-touched map. “Right,” I confirm.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The case ended quicker than I wanted it to, although I’m sure I would’ve loved it that way if Spencer didn’t confess his secret to me. Katie gives the B.A.U. another round of handshakes, as do I, and one by one, they exit the building— all except Spencer. “So, uh, Y/N…” he trails off. “Yeah?” “C-Can we, y’know, like, talk sometime?” My heart stops at his question, but I manage to compile an, “Over coffee?” “S-Sure,” he stammers, handing me a folded piece of paper. “Here’s my number— I’m sure you deleted it after we… y’know…” He’s right, I did, but that’s not what makes my head spin. This feels exactly like when he first asked me out— from the coffee date to the folded piece of paper. “Next Thursday sound okay?” I ask, pocketing the note. “Yeah,” Spencer says. “It’s a date.” A warm blush creeps up his neck and the tiniest smile forms on his lips. I smile back and fidget with my fingers, my body refusing to move. “B-Bye,” he stammers, waving as he turns to leave. “Bye,” I respond, watching ad he walks off towards the SUVs. Katie grins and punches me in the arm. “Lovergirl.” “I don’t know about that,” I admit, allowing a laugh to escape my lips. “Whatever you say, Y/N.”

[pastanest]

if you’re wondering why I’m having to repost this, or why you were perhaps previously following me but no longer are, please refer to this post. I was able to retrieve this thanks to @rosieathena - thanks so much!! ♡

Spencer Reid x gender neutral!reader

Can I Hug You?

- as soon as you walked into the office that morning, Spencer could tell you were not having a good day

- though you were dressed properly with your hair tied back in a neat ponytail to match the professional nature of your job, the bags under your weary eyes and the vacant expression on your face that showed only a hint of panic, all combined into one huge alarm bell of an indication that you were not yourself

- the way you fumbled at your desk only confirmed his suspicions

- as you scrambled to get all your papers in order, Emily walked past you and accidentally nudged you, causing a far more jumpy reaction than Spencer had expected, before your papers fell to the floor

- you stared at the mess of papers on the floor, your eyes slowly filling with tears, and that was all it took

- in an instant, Spencer was at your side, bending down to easily pick up and organise your papers in a matter of seconds

- after placing them on your desk, his eyes met yours. he didnt say anything, but his concerned expression made you feel sick with guilt

- he gestured to an empty interview room and you nodded wordlessly, the two of you making a beeline for the door

- once inside, Spencer closed the blinds to give you complete privacy.

“Talk to me.” He pleaded, his voice so quiet, so gentle, you didnt even try resisting.

You took in a sharp breath and it wavered, alerting Spencer of just how hard you were holding back tears.

“Nothin’ more than a rough day, honestly. I woke up feeling awful, not physically, but how Im feeling has exhausted me. Im just very overwhelmed, I feel trapped, constantly surrounded by things to do and people looking at me but not...it’s stupid, forget it.” You shook your head.

- Spencer raised an eyebrow at your words, curiosity overtaking every thought in his mind. he wondered how long you’d felt this way, but he could ask you that later, his first priority was doing what he could to make you feel better in that moment

- he leant against the wall, watching as you sat back on the table, kicking your legs in the air and avoiding his eyes. something was embarrassing you, but what could it be?

- and it was as though a lightbulb appeared above his head when Spencer remembered the way you’d reacted to Emily bumping into you earlier.

“It’s touch, isnt it? You feel that people are constantly watching you, but never touching you, never connecting with you.”

- your cheeks flushed as Spencer exposed your inner thoughts, and you were quick to stare down at your thighs, hiding your face from him as best as you could. but again, you couldnt resist him, you couldnt lie, so you nodded

- Spencer’s empathy for you grew exponentially then, because he completely understood, he, too, craved human contact often, but it was different due to his general discomfort in that area.

“What can I do?” His question sounded loud and heavy in the silence, but it was so heartfelt, all he wanted to do was help, and how were you supposed to deny such genuine care.

You sighed, defeated. “I know you’re not big on physical contact, so Im not expecting you to say yes to this, but...can I hug you?”

- Spencer was completely taken aback by this. though he should have expected a response that suggested physical comfort, he didnt think you would want it from him. but it was so much more than that.

“Nobody has ever asked to hug me before..” He practically whispered.

Instantly, your head shot up to meet his eyes, and you frowned. “Well, their intentions are likely kind, but they should still ask, anyone should. I wont do anything to make you uncomfortable, I just...I know I can trust you not to laugh at me like this. The rest of the team wouldnt either, I know that, but I trust you most when Im vulnerable like this. I dont know, it’s probably silly.” You trailed off, avoiding his gaze again.

“It isnt silly at all, and to answer your question, yes.” A small smile had made its way on Spencer’s face, and he hoped that because you werent looking at him you wouldnt see, but sure enough, upon hearing his answer, you had to look at him

- words were lost to you then, and you hopped off the table in a way that Spencer found utterly adorable, before you slowly approached him

- your steps towards him were hesitant, until your bodies were almost touching, and then he opened his arms to you and you all but fell into them

- Spencer wrapped his arms around you gently, careful not to hurt you, but when he felt how you were clinging to him, he couldnt stop himself from holding you tighter, the way he had been desiring to since the day you met

- you hid your face in Spencer’s wooly sweater, breathing in his scent and enveloping yourself in the sensation of his arms around you. it was so comforting, exactly what you needed, and you started to cry into his chest

- he noticed at the first sniffle, his arms squeezing you reassuringly as he placed a kiss on the top of your head

“Shhh, Im right here.” He cooed.

- Spencer lifted you slightly so that you were standing on his shoes, and began rocking back and forth slightly with you still in his arms until you stopped crying

- a few minutes of comfortable silence passed before Spencer decided to voice his thoughts.

“I really appreciate you asking me whether I’d be comfortable with this...thank you. It means a lot that you respect my usual discomfort in situations like this.”

You lifted your head to look up at him, a cheeky grin plastered on your face that made the heart of a genius skip a beat. “Usual discomfort? Does that mean you‘re enjoying this?”

Spencer smiled down at you. “Very much so.“

Seeing him smile at you was enough to make you blush, and you were forced to hide your face in his sweater again.

“Me too.”

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Cold Comfort: Final Part

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.4k

Summary: You meet another psychic on a case that doesn’t want to work with you, and everyone’s faith is tested on exactly what you can do.

Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there are any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them. If you’ve seen the show, then it’s the same level of angst unless otherwise stated

x

The DNA results came back from the swabs the teams took of potential suspects, but nothing came back. Your guy is still out there until you catch him.

Detective Fullwood brings you to his office to speak to you privately.

"I want to believe in this. I want to have faith. Please tell me you can get something off this wig."

He hands over the wig the ME gave you and Hotch for testing.

"It doesn't quite work like that. This wig isn't going to help because Ivan isn't the killer. The only thing I'm going to get off this is that Ivan is sick. He should be arrested for the things he's done, but he isn't the killer." There is loud commotion coming from the lobby, and you see Ivan escorted by police with handcuffs on his wrists. "You don't have faith and you don't really believe me. You went and arrested Ivan anyway. How arrogant can you truly be?"

Rossi and Hotch walk into his office with angry looks on their faces.

"So, you went ahead and arrested him?"

"He was trying to cross the border into Vancouver."

"Are you going to charge him?"

"I will if he confesses. Failing that, we'll hold him so he can't skip town while we're waiting for his DNA results."

Ivan is taken to an interrogation room for questioning that Ron needs to be part of. He and Emily take the lead on this one while everyone else watches from the room right outside.

"Why don't you tell me about this?" Ron slides the wig closer to Ivan.

"It looks like a wig."

"That is a magic wig. It changes the identity of the dead."

"What?"

"Well, I thought that's why you were putting it on the bodies at the morgue. It makes the fantasy more real. Who were you trying to turn them into?"

Ivan doesn't answer.

"I have worked some sick cases with rapists, pedophiles--"

"I hope you're not grouping me with those people," Ivan cuts Ron off.

"You may be the sickest of them all."

"Sick or not, many would argue it's a victimless crime."

"What's victimless about Lynette Hagen?"

"Who?"

"Melissa Claire?"

"I don't know who these women are. You have the wrong--"

"Necrophile?" Ron finishes for him.

He's really starting to get on your nerves, and you let it show.

"What, you think I'm the only guy in town who likes to crack open a cold one?"

"Where is Brooke Lombardini?"

"I don't know who that is. I don't kill people."

"These profilers say our killer is trying to turn these girls into a loved one like a wife or a mom. Is your mother a blonde, Ivan?" Ron asks.

"That's disgusting. The wig isn't even the important part. For me, it's the shoes. They're a very special pair."

"What's special about them?"

"The woman who walked in them. Sunny Raines."

"The weather girl? She was a local celebrity killed in a car accident a couple of years ago," Ron says to Emily.

"A friend of mine was working when she came in. He knew I was a fan. He stole her shoes for me. The wig just completed the look, but the shoes are a genuine article. That's what makes it real," he sighs.

Spencer leaves the room, and you turn to Rossi with your arms crossed.

"He didn't do it. He never touched our victims."

"How do you know?"

"When I look at a killer, all I see are their victims and their victim's energies because, for them, that's their anchor. That person is what's tying them to people like me. When I look at Ivan, all I see is what he's done but they're not alive. He doesn't kill them. Brooke is alive because her mother is her anchor. Sandra's passionate about finding her daughter, and it's through her that I can feel Brooke is alive. The dead give off spiritual energy while the living gives off aura energy. I can't make you understand because you don't know; not truly."

"I believe you."

This time, he really does. While Emily and Ron talk to Ivan, the rest of you head over to Spencer to see what he's found.

"I found a genuine article about a grave robbery. I thought it was a simple theft, but a dress, a pair of diamond earrings, and a pair of pearl earrings were taken from the corpse."

"If our unsub is like Bakunas, then he needs the genuine articles from the true object of his affection to complete the fantasy."

"Exactly. This grave could belong to that woman."

Spencer calls Penelope to see who owns that grave.

"Let's see. Her name is Abigail Hansen. I got her obit from the Olympian. Abigail Reina Hansen died suddenly at twenty-six from myocarditis, a heart defect. I'm sending her passport photo now."

When the picture pops up, it suddenly makes so much sense. Abigail had short blonde hair--it's why the unsub cut his victim's hair.

"Garcia, what else can you tell us about her?"

"I can tell you that she was born in Amsterdam, she never married, and her employment records show her working for Patrick and Leona Gless from 1985 to her death in 1992."

"Can you get us an address for the Gless family? They might be the only ones who can tell us who Abigail was."

"Already sent."

You, Rossi, and Hotch head over to the Gless house immediately in hopes that they are willing to talk to you. It wouldn't be the first time a family knows about their family member's extracurricular activity. Brooke's energy is all over this house so much so that it's overwhelming.

"Did Garcia say what Mr. Gless does for a living?" Rossi asks.

"Failed artist."

You knock on the front door and wait for one of the owners to answer the door.

"Can I help you?" Leona asks.

"I'm Agent Y/N and they're Agents Hotchner and Rossi. We're with the FBI. Do you mind if we come inside and talk about Abigail Hansen?"

"Of course." She leads you inside and into the living room where her husband is. "What do you want to know?"

"What can you tell me about Abigail?"

"I think about Abigail from time to time. She was such a nice girl. She was like one of the family."

"Was that why you paid for the funeral?"

"She didn't have anyone else. She was from Denmark," Patrick says.

"Holland, dear," Leona corrects.

"What kind of work did she do for you?"

"She was the caretaker, and there was some cooking and cleaning."

"Did she take care of the children?"

"Just the one--our son Roderick." Patrick grabs a picture from on top of a desk and hands it over to you. "This is the two of them together."

Abigail is much older than Roderick, but you know they were close. It's in the way he stands, how close he stands next to her, the smile on his face, and how happy he seemed. This is him, this is the unsub.

"They look close."

"She practically raised him," Leona says.

"I wouldn't go quite that far."

"No? What would you call it? Patrick likes to think he was a good father."

Patrick sighs and decides to move on from this.

"Why do you want to know about Abigail?"

"We believe that there may be a connection to some recent murders, maybe someone she knew. How old was your son when Abigail died?"

"Nine. We weren't here when it happened. We were on a cruise."

"Was Roderick here with Abigail when it happened?"

"Yeah," Leona sighs. "When we returned, we knew something was wrong. The smell was horrid. They were in his room on the floor. He was curled up next to her with her arms around him. It's how he got to sleep."

"How long had she been dead?"

"Two or three days. I didn't have the stomach for the details."

"Where is Roderick? We'd like to speak to him."

"If I knew where he was I'd be happy to tell you, but we haven't spoken in years. When he turned twenty-one, he dropped out of medical school and liquidated his trust fund. We knew he was troubled, but I had no idea he would ever hurt someone."

"They don't know for sure that he's--You don't know for sure," Patrick says nervously.

Now why would he be nervous? He knows more than he's letting on but it doesn't look like he will say anything more about it.

"When was your last communication?"

"We got a letter about a year ago."

Leona reaches into a drawer from the side table and produces a letter that's been torn open. It's as if she took the letter in and out multiple times.

"Can we borrow this?"

"You can have it. While you're at it, take this."

She also hands you the picture of Roderick and Abigail when they were younger. They won't say anything else about the matter, so you three take what they gave you and head back to the police station. On the way over there, you gave Penelope the job of looking into Roderick Gless since he's the number one suspect in this case. When you arrive, she's got all that you asked for.

"It's exactly how they said. Roderick's trust was emptied in March of '04. Half a million bucks."

"Where is he now?" Rossi asks.

"Sir, the thing is, he's gotta be using straight cash because there's no paper trail on him for the last four years. Nothing from the IRS or the DMV, and there's no property or utilities in his name.

"You can't find him?"

"I'm sorry," she sighs.

"You know, a half a million isn't what it used to be. With the way this unsub is accustomed to living, after four years, he would need to supplement his income."

"Anything between the lines, Reid?" Rossi asks Spencer who is studying the letter.

"Nothing that points to a specific location. He's basically saying he's happy and that should be enough for her. It's essentially a goodbye letter. It's only addressed to Leona."

"Why not his dad?"

"Maybe they didn't get along."

"No, that's not right," Rossi shakes his head and steps away with Pen on the line. "Garcia, I need you to check something else."

"So, basically, we got nothing."

"No, we don't have nothing. We have her," JJ says and looks at you. "Can you read it?"

"JJ," you sigh.

"Please?"

It doesn't work like that, but she needs you to do this. You sigh but take the letter to see if maybe you can get something off it. If Roderick wrote this, then his energy will be attached to it. You won't be able to see Brooke, but you might be able to pinpoint where Roderick is. You close your eyes and let the energy do the talking.

There's enough to paint a picture, and all you see are plastic medical strip curtains and a rocky shoreline like by a beach or something. There's no panic or anger within the letter because Roderick feels safe. It's not much, but that's all you're getting.

"It's not very specific," Hotch says when you tell them. "The earth is two-thirds water."

JJ looks for a picture of the Gless house which is on Mercer Island.

"Okay, this photo is from the Gless house which was taken on Mercer Island. That's a waterfront property. No one's lived there for ten years. It's abandoned, I checked. This could be where he's holding Brooke."

"Patrick is sending his son money," Rossi reveals when he comes back. "It's the reason Roderick never said goodbye to him in the letter. They never lost contact. That supplemental income you were asking about? This is it. Every six months, he gets a $50,000 wire."

"This is Western Union, though. There's no way to tell he's on the receiving end."

"I'm telling you, he's sending it to Roderick. If you'd seen his father, you'd know."

"He does have a point. I felt like he was hiding something from us. He got nervous and clammed up when he found out his son might be the murderer we're looking for."

"He's submissive in the marriage. He's probably sending it behind her back. I don't think Leona knew because I think he's a sad man trying to buy back his son's love."

"This is where Brooke's 911 call originated. Western Union is within the circle. Mercer Island isn't," Ron says.

"This is a waterfront property. There isn't any water around Western Union."

"JJ, we need to follow the facts," Hotch says.

Despite what JJ thinks, everyone gets ready to raid the place in Western Union. When you walk in, the first thing you're greeted with are the medical plastic strip curtains you saw when you touched the letter. Inside is Brooke lying on a hospital bed with her hair cut. Leaning over her is Roderick about to perform surgery to embalm her.

"FBI! Drop the weapon!" Derek yells.

Roderick tries to escape but Derek tackles him to the ground.

"Is she alive?" Ron asks.

Brooke moans in pain and rolls her head to the side, letting you know that she is alive and will eventually be okay.

"Paramedics!" Hotch yells. They come rushing in with equipment to take care of her. "He uses a barbiturate."

Now that they know exactly how to treat her, you know she is going to be okay. Rossi walks over to you with a skeptical look on his face. He still doesn't believe in what you can do, but he trusts you to always do your best to get the bad guy.

"There isn't any water or a rocky shoreline."

There are curtains on the windows to block out potential witnesses looking in and catching Roderick in the act, so you pull them to the side to look out the windows. Right there in front of you on a billboard is an ad with water and a rocky shoreline.

"It's not an exact science." Rossi is genuinely shocked about all this. "Why are you so against other psychics, Rossi? What harm are these people doing?"

"I asked the same question once. It was a kidnapping case in Georgia. We had nothing, time was running out, and there was a local woman known for her abilities. On her advice, we took the investigation in the wrong direction. The boy died."

"Children are pure and innocent, and I'd do anything to help them keep that part of them. Just know I'd never leave you astray because this is my passion. Helping people makes my abilities worth it. I see such awful things every day even when I go grocery shopping. There are victims everywhere with stories to tell, and they look to me to tell them. I see rapes, murders, robberies, suicides, and everything in between. I don't get a choice, Rossi, but the people I save do. They make it worth it."

"I wish I could see what you see so I can understand better."

"No, you don't," you whisper. "Just be glad you don't."

"For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible." - Stuart Chase

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[spencer-reids-adventures]

prompt - late s1 to early s2 Spencer telling Gideon he's been diagnosed with schizophrenia.

A/N: I have no idea what the actual FBI policy is like for agents with mental illnesses. This story is complete fiction.

Spencer stands outside Gideon’s office, his arms wrapped around himself, hunched over as he digs one toe into the carpet. He’s been out there for about 15 minutes, but hasn’t managed to make himself knock on the door yet. Before his brain can take him in circles one more time, the door opens, and Gideon steps out.

“Reid?” he says. “Is there something I can help you with?”

Spencer stares at him with wide eyes, and then he swallows and nods. “There’s something I need to speak to you about,” he says. “When you have a chance.”

“I was just going to grab some food and bring it back to my office to eat. Would you like to join me for lunch?”

“Yes, please,” says Spencer. “I’ll—I have my lunch in the fridge. I’ll go get it.”

Ten minutes later they are both seated in Gideon’s office, Gideon at his desk, Spencer in a chair across from him. Gideon gives him a reassuring smile.

“What did you want to talk about?”

Spencer fidgets anxiously and looks past Gideon’s ear—his best approximation of eye contact. 

“I saw a new doctor yesterday,” he says softly.

“What kind of doctor?” Gideon asks, cutting to the chase, and Spencer cringes a little.

“A specialist,” he says vaguely.

“Spencer.”

“A psychiatrist.”

“Okay.” Gideon pauses. “Is there more you wanted to say about that?”

Spencer nods.

“I’m here whenever you’re ready,” Gideon says kindly. “Take your time, okay?”

Spencer nods again. “It’s, um. I got a…new diagnosis.”

“Okay.”

“Did you know my mom has schizophrenia?” he asks, veering slightly off course. 

“I had heard something to that effect, yes,” says Gideon. “She’s institutionalized?”

“Yeah. I did that to her, when I was 18. She couldn’t live on her own anymore.”

Gideon nods. “That sounds difficult.”

“I have schizophrenia,” Spencer blurts out. “That’s what the doctor told me. I’ve been seeing her for…for several months now.”

“Several months?” Gideon sounds surprised. “Have you suspected that something was going on?”

Spencer nods. “I haven’t felt like myself for a long time,” he admits. “And lately the symptoms have become a little bit more…distressing. So I thought I should talk to someone about it.”

“You did the right thing, Spencer. I’m proud of you.”

Spencer stares at him. “Why are you proud of me?” he asks. “I’m sick.”

“I’m proud of you for seeking out help when you needed it,” Gideon says. “Are you continuing to see your psychiatrist?”

“Yes,” Spencer says quietly. “I see her weekly.”

“Is she starting you on medication?”

Spencer nods. “I, um, I started it last night,” he says. 

“How are you feeling?”

“About the same.” Spencer shrugs. “It’s only been one day.”

“That’s fair.”

“Am I going to have to leave my job?” Spencer suddenly asks. “Am I—is this the end of my BAU career?”

Gideon frowns. “I don’t see why it would be,” he says. “Some aspects of your job may need to be reevaluated, but overall, you are an asset to the Bureau. As long as you don’t have active symptoms that are getting in the way of your work, and you’re willing to take time off when you are having symptoms, I think you should be just fine.”

“Thank you, sir,” Spencer says, staring down at his lap. When he looks up at Gideon, his eyes are shining. “Just…thank you.”

“You’re going to be okay,” Gideon promises. “Don’t ever forget that we’re all here for you, all right?”

“Thank you,” Spencer repeats one more time.

[musewritingsforyou]

Changed

Summary: Spencer gets out of jail and reunites with Y/N but is afraid he has changed too much.

Warnings: crying, angst, mentions of prison, mentions of injury (very minor)

words: 2.4 K

Pairing: Spencer Reid X Gn!Reader

A/N: its been a while so I thought I would write a single chapter thing to please the people. if anyone has any cool ideas for another single or even a multichap lmk, I would be happy to oblige.

*I do not own any CM characters.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I scurried around Spencer and I’s apartment hastily grabbing his old satchel and tossing a jacket into it. Even since he left for prison this was the only bag I would use, no matter how many things I had to carry I would only use his satchel. It was just a way for me to be with him even if I couldn’t really be with him. The first visit anyone from the team had with him he made them promise that they wouldn't let me go see him. He said he would call me when he could, and he did, or tried too, but after a week the calls stopped. JJ assured me that he was okay, she continued to see him once a week and would always call me and update me every chance she got, but it just wasn't enough. I needed to see him.

So today, I woke up. I called the prison to let them know I would be visiting, and I packed up to leave. I was more nervous today than I was on the day he was put in there. That day I was so confident that he would be fine, I thought it was a cut and dry thing and he would be home for dinner that night, but he wasn't. Just as I put my hand on the doorknob to leave I heard a ring come from my phone inside Spencer's satchel. I looked down at it to see a picture of JJ holding Henry lighting up my screen in the dark of my apartment.

“JJ, hi, I was about to call you actually, well sort of, i'm on my way to see Spence and I know he didn't want me to come, but I think I have a way to get him out of there and I just need to be the one to tell him you know?”

She was silent on the other end for a second before taking a very deep breath.

“Y/N, he's here.”

“What do you mean he's here, are you at the prison?”

“No, Y/N, he’s at the BAU, he's been out for a day”

Right away my mind went to all sorts of places I knew it shouldn't.

“Why didn't anyone tell me! What, does he not want to see me! Is he even okay?” I was screaming into the phone even though I knew it wasn't fair to her. Whatever this was, it wasn't JJ’s fault.

“Hey, hey! Don't go there, it wasn't like that I promise. As soon as we got him out we had to throw him into a case, he wanted to call you I promise but, Y/N, it was about Cat.”

“He was out for less than a day and that bitch tried to take him away from me again? Where is he, he couldn't have called me?”

“It wasn't just about Cat, it was about his mom, listen she's fine now, everything’s okay, but I need you to come get him from the BAU. he needs you to take him home. He needs you”

“I’m on my way”

It was those last three words that got me out of my head. Who was I to be angry at him when poor Spence had gone through so much. Still with his satchel on my shoulder I finally left our small apartment. Barely moved into before he was taken from me so abruptly. It just wasn't fair, the universe had it out for him I swear, first his mom gets sick, and then when he goes to help her he’s almost killed, and then he was convicted for something we all know he would never in a million years do, he won't even tell me what happened in there because it was so bad, and then he finally gets out, unbeknownst to me, is thrown into a case before he can even call, has to go back to that horrible women who tears him apart. Even just thinking about it makes me cry for him. He didn't deserve any of it.

I wipe a few stray tears from my eyes as I step into the car and put his satchel on the passenger's side of the car. I look up at the picture of him I placed on the console and place it back in my bag, ever so ready to replace it with the real thing.

“I'm coming Spence”

~~~~~~~~~

The drive from our apartment to the BAU is particularly long, but it seemed even shorter to me this time. Maybe I was speeding, who knows, but I was almost surprised when suddenly I found myself in the parking garage outside of their buildings, as if my brain had decided it wasn’t important to focus on driving when there was something more important to come.

I grabbed the brown satchel and threw it on my shoulder before running into the elevator and frantically pressing the level six button repeatedly. Spencer's voice in my head chuckled, you know that wont make it go faster, right? He's so close. I couldn't help the tears that started to fall again as I took shaky breaths to calm myself. I didn't know what sort of pain he was in right now, and it wouldn't be fair of me to make him have to take care of me. I wiped them off again as the elevator stopped on floor six. I waited impatiently for the doors to open and tears started again no matter how hard I wanted them to stop. And then the doors opened.

It was like I was seeing him for the first time all over again. He had obviously heard the elevator ding and began walking towards it as the doors were opening slowly. So when, finally, the doors were opened all the way he was facing me, battered and bruised and opening up the glass doors I had seen him behind many times before.  I was frozen as I looked at him. He was there, he was my Spencer but, different. I took one step out of the elevator before I just stopped breathing all together,. He walked toward me still with the whole team behind him, sorry looks on their faces. I finally unfroze and ran the distance to him, throwing myself into his arms. It startled him and he flinched but wrapped his arms around me automatically.

“It's you,” I said in between sobs and he nestled his head into my neck.

“Its me”

I continued to cry as he held me. When I finally lifted my head from his shoulder I looked at his team, who were staring lovingly back at me. I looked at all of them and mouthed; thank you, before pulling back from Spencer to kiss him. His lips were chapped and mine were salty. But the love that he put into that kiss was more than I had ever felt from him. When we finally broke apart I clung to him as we walked into the elevator. The entire interaction was about ten minutes, all of which were just me crying as he held me. Ten minutes seemed like a lifetime to me.

In the elevator he was silent. He looked down at the floor, obviously deep in thought and I just started at him. The more I looked the more worried I became. For each second I looked at him I saw one more cut, one more bruise, one more scar that wasn't there the last time I saw him. Even though he didn't look up at me or even speak at all, he put a hand on the crook of my elbow like he always used to and held it tight for the entire walk back to the car. He still had a slight limp from the incident last week. It served as yet another reminder to me that the Spencer I’m with right now is not the same Spencer that i knew before.

The drive home again felt short. He never spoke and neither did I, but I could feel his gaze on me as I drove, just trying to tell if I was really there. When we made it up the stairs to our apartment door he stood behind me and stared at the door. When I opened it with my keys and held it open for him he shook his head quickly as if trying to wake himself up from something and then finally walked inside. Every move he made was like he was afraid of hurting himself or me.

“Go sit, i'll make you something to eat”

I wasn't going to say it for fear of sounding like a grandmother, but he looked very thin. I mean I love my string bean boyfriend don't get me wrong, but this wasn't healthy.

I reheated him some Rossi pasta leftovers that I knew he would love before placing it in front of him at the counter. I sat on a stool beside him and got a comb to work through his hair. He ate tentatively but seemed to relax as I brushed through his hair. The comb did nothing so eventually I just worked my fingers through his curly locks, trying to bring more comfort than fix it.

That entire night we didn't speak at all. Well, he didn't. Every once in a while I would talk to him, just one sided things, i'll go clean up, why don't you get changed, let’s go to bed. And finally when we laid in bed I moved all the way onto his side and tried to have as much of me touching him as possible. He touched my back carefully, like he was afraid of breaking me. Eventually I fell asleep, but I don't know if he ever did. At some point I suppose he must have because he woke me up screaming. Rocking himself back and forth with glassy eyes and heaving.

“Spence? Spencer, you're okay! Look at me hey,-” I moved so that I was sitting in front of him but was careful not to touch him.

“You're okay, i'm right here, it’s okay” the screaming stopped but the glassy look in his eyes stayed and he still cried and rocked back and forth. He looked so..pained. After he had stopped screaming I placed a tentative hand on his arm careful to do it slowly so I wouldn't startle him. He flinched and looked at me with terrified eyes.

“Don’t, please, don’t.” I took my hand away but started to cry.

“Spencer, you aren't going to hurt me, it's okay.” he shook his head and looked almost angry through his tears.

“You don't. You don't know that.” so that's what this was about.

“Of course I do. I know you, and you would never hurt me, I know that.” I was crying but trying to keep myself calm so i wouldn't startle him.

“Do you know what I did today?” he raised his voice a little and his eyebrows pulled together.

“Did JJ tell you that she had to pull me off of Cat?”  i could feel my heart breaking into pieces, he wasn't just scared of hurting me for nothing, he had actually hurt someone.

“Did she tell you that I put my hands around her neck and shoved her against a wall? Did she tell you that I wanted to- no, that I would have killed her. If she wasn’t there to pull me off I would have killed someone. Did she tell you that?”

I sat there in shock not knowing what to say. She hadn't told me.

“Spencer you had good reason, anyone who’s been through what you have would-”

“Would what? Kill someone?”

“Spencer I know you wouldn't hurt me!”

“No, you don’t! Prison changed me, Y/N, i'm not the person you loved anymore!”

“Don't you dare say that! I love you Spencer! I love you now and I loved you then, you are the same person that I loved!”

“No. no i’m not. The Spencer that you fell in love with would never have done that. Would never have done this.”

He gestured to me, we were both crying fervently, covered in salty tears and snot. I was still sitting in front of him on the bed.

“Don't tell me that it didn't change me. It did. It did change me.”  

“Fine. it changed you. It also changed me. And you know how it changed us both?” I looked him dead in the eyes and placed a hand on his cheek wiping away a few tears.

“It made you more compassionate. More observant. It made you even more.. You. and it only made me love this new you more. So yes, yes it changed you, but that doesn’t mean I don't love you, that doesn't mean you are suddenly less deserving of love! I love you Spencer Reid, and I won't stop doing that just because you went through hell! You got out! And I am here! So why don't you just shut up and let me love you!”

He was silent for a couple of minutes after. We had both stopped crying. He placed a hand on my cheek just like mine was on his and looked me in the eyes with a small smile.

“Well, what's that for” I was still crying a little but when I heard him chuckle it took all of my tears away.

“Well, you told me to shut up and let you love me, so that's what I'm doing.”

he laughed a little, but bit his lip after he said it, trying to make himself stop laughing. But as soon as he said it I started laughing. The both of us laughed at each other. Snot covered and torn apart, but somehow still laughing.

“You know, I threw a book today” he laughed and pulled me into his chest where I looked up at him.

“A book? My goodness, maybe you aren't the same man after all!” I laughed at him and he shook his head as he smiled down at me.

“Nah, same man, I felt really bad afterword and made Garcia order another copy”

We both laughed and he kissed the top of my head. He slid down so we were both laying down in bed again. After a few minutes I noticed that his breathing was slow and steady. He was asleep. Peacefully asleep. I looked at him from his chest and with a small tear on my face kissed him on the cheek.

“I love you Spencer Reid. Always”

[first-edition]

Breaking Seasons

Spencer reid x reader fanfiction

Updates every Tuesday and Thursday.

Read the previous chapter here

Chapter 5

Summary- When y/n takes her sick friends criminology class to take notes in the winter, she meets the guest speaker, BAU-FBI agent Spencer reid. After getting to know more about each other due to a college school related case, that ends up involving y/n herself, they naught just have each to keep warm.

Cw- This chapter contains sexual themes such as heavy petting, kissing, touching and leaving hickies. However not actually sex occurs.

STORY BEGINS UNDER THE CUT

                                 ─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The entire night spencer stayed with you. Holding you in your bed the entire night eventually falling asleep in his arms. Even then he didn't leave he just slept along side you. The morning came a gloomy day as rain cloud covered the sky. Snow falls clouding and frosting up your windows. Not allowing much light to come in as usual. 

Your eyes open as you're met with Spencer's brown ones he moves hair out of your face. 

"Morning." He says softly you burry your face into his chest hearing his light heart beat. He hugs you tighter. 

"Im sorry." He says which only makes your eyes tear up. You pull away from him and get up pulling the blanket off the bed and wrapping it around your self  walking out only to trip and fall landing of the ground. You huff and begin to cry the feeling of loosing your best friend hitting all a over again. Spencer Immedetly gets up and goes to you picking you up in his arms sitting on the ground with you in his lap hugging you. 

———

You sit on the couch as the news plays in the background high snow patterns and roads are closed in the local area your phone chimes signally classes are canceled not like you were gonna go anyway. Spencer who walks into the room from a shower and extra comfy clothes he had in his go bag. 

"Are you sure you're gonna stay your team needs you." You say. 

"No hot hotch texted me the others are held up in the hotel if they need me i have my lap top they can call." He says sitting next to you.

"Im sorry." He says 

"You need to stop that..stop apologizing you didn't do it. Your not the reason." You say drinking your coffee. 

"Thank you though... for spending the night with me. You didn't have to do that." You continue.

"Studies show that loved ones after another loss are prone to self harm weather is drinking drugs, or even cutting to killing themself i um...I didn't want you to be alone-" 

"Because you thought I'd hurt myself." 

"Becuase I care about you...I didn't like seeing you hurting" he says you put your head on his shoulder. 

"Thanks." you say he nods to you putting his head on yours. Your phone buzzes on the table another text from your ex. 

You take your phone and turn it to do not disturb. 

"Why don't you block him?" Spencer asks. 

"He works for my dad i need it as a backup contact" you say "spence.." 

"Hmm?" 

"Tell me something good." 

"Okay Nutmeg is a hallucinogen. The spice contains myristicin, a natural compound that has mind-altering effects if ingested in large doses." He says 

You chuckle "something good not weird."

"Made you smile though didnt it?" He says looking at you. 

"Tell me something about you you haven't told me yet." You say 

"Hmm I have a large burn scar on the back of my thigh and shoulder blade becuase of a bomb went off behind me and I fought on fire." He says 

"A bomb when off so close to you your got burned?" You asked concerned. 

"Yes a man had hacked our computer system through a game and we went after him and he'd set off a bomb. I'm sorry perfectly fine. I also got shot in the knee" He says 

"Wh-what!?" You say moving more to look at him involuntary putting you hand on his thigh.

"Y-yeah. I'm fine though" he says feeling your touch. He may have a germ thing but never with you. 

"Don't get shot again." You say he chuckles and nods.

"Yeah I'll um I'll try not to." He smiles

Once again you're caught admiring his features his light stubble. Curly brown hair falling slightly in his face that he pushes back when he talks. His brown eyes, soft cheeks,  and his lips those perfect lips.

He catches you starring at him he smiles his smile softens as he notices your features as you look at him. Your eyes move up to his and locks. 

"Can I kiss you." He says. He sit up a bit pulling back. 

"You're not supposed to ask." You reply.

He chuckles. "Sorry I don't really know if I c-" you cut him off pressing your lips against his kissing him. His lips catch yours and his hand rests agains your cheek keeping you too him. He inhales you sent of your sweet body wash and shampoo as he deepens the kiss moving his other hand down you waist. You move your arm around his neck. He pulls you up into his lap as you straddle him. 

Opening your mouth to breath ensures him a perfect path you slip his tongue in your mouth. Sloppily kissing you as you kiss him back. His hands grip your waist moving underneath you oversized shirt only now realizing that you're still pants less in your underwear. His hands travel up your back. Your finger wander is hair messing it up. 

Soon they move to his chest and down to the hem of his sweat pants slightly lifting his shirt feeling his torso of abs. He hisses into you and chuckles on your lips. 

"Your hands are cold." He says you giggle as he lightly squeezes your hips. Wanting nothing more that to see you. You pull off his shirt and move away from his lips kissing his perfect jaw and neck so close to leaving marks yet being mindful of his line of work. So you leave two on his collar bone he chuckles at your eagerness. 

You move back out to his lips pecking them. Almost teasing him. He dips his head down into your neck leaving a few kisses and moving to look down to your chest slowly lifting your shirt awaiting the beautiful sight that will be your breasts, big small, uneven it dosnt matter to him he wants you. He's falling for you.

The loud ringing on his phone takes everything to a screeching halt. He huffs and puts his forehead against your chest annoyed with his job. 

"Fuck." He mumbles you laugh running your fingers through his hair. He looks up at you pouting.

"Im gonna go write my thesis paper." You say pecking his lips and getting off him so he can put his shirt back on and answer the oncoming FaceTime. As you walk into your room.

Read next chapter here

[radiant-reid]

Touched starved

It was no secret this case had been extra hard on Spencer. Even Y/n, the newest member of the team, knew some bad things happened when he was kidnapped by Tobias Hankel. Most of the details were covered up though.

Spencer didn’t talk about it much. Only a few words when he felt strong enough. With having only been at the BAU for two years Y/n knew the least of what happened. 

Then again, she was a profiler. She could tell this case was having a more-than-usual bad effect on Spencer. 

It was because of the parallels, she figured. This unsub had been kidnapping and torturing victims. Having to solve it and, more importantly, knowing there was someone out there just like him, was hard on Spencer. 

His brain almost didn’t work as it ran constant flashbacks of what Hankel did to him. Like a horror movie with no ending. 

Everyone noticed, not just Y/n.

She just didn’t understand why they wouldn’t help him. They were all far closer to him than Y/n was. Prentiss, Morgan and JJ didn’t seem to be doing anything to help him but Y/n just felt like she couldn’t let him suffer in silence. She knew Garcia had tried to ask him how he was on the phone but there was only so much she could do from so far away. It wasn’t any of the team's fault though, they knew how Spencer operated.

That was how she found herself outside his hotel room on the 3rd night of the case. After seeing his condition slowly deteriorate throughout the hours they’d been on the case, she couldn’t just sit by. So dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants, she knocked on his door. 

“Y/n... what are you doing here?” Spencer asked as he opened the door to see who it was. It was very obvious that in the 4 hours since Hotch had sent them to get some rest, Spencer had not slept a second. 

“I...” Y/n didn’t actually know how to answer his question. Instead, she just walked into his hotel room which caused him a lot of confusion. The puzzled look on his face didn’t stop. “I’m here for you, Spence.” She told him as she sat on his bed. 

“Obviously, you’re in my room but I don’t understand why.” He replied. His brows were furrowed and his arms crossed across his chest. At least he’d changed into a hoodie and pants. Y/n didn’t think she’d ever seen him in a hoodie. 

“Come here.” She instructed and he obliged, walking over to her so he was at the foot of the bed. “I’m here so you can have someone to talk to. Or not to talk to.” She explained. He still, very obviously, didn’t understand. “You haven’t stopped working on this case for almost 72 hours straight, that’s unhealthy. Now, you’re going to relax and just stop thinking about it.” 

Spencer huffed out a sigh. “I can’t just stop thinking about it.”

“Why?” 

“There’s someone out there who can’t stop thinking about it. He’s scared, terrified. And he’s just hoping that we can save him. But everything is telling him that there’s no one left. That they’re going to get there and be left with just his body.” Spencer hunched over as he talked, feeling as small as he looked. Tears were forming in his eyes and he was desperately fighting them. “I can’t stop working on this because we need to find out where he is. I can’t stop working on this because he can’t stop thinking about it. He’s living through the torture but he’s going to give up and want to give in to death.”

“What happened, Spencer?” Y/n softly asked as the tears started spilling down his cheeks. 

He just stood there blankly. “I can’t.” He sobbed out. 

Y/n knew about his aversion to hugs but she pulled him in for one, wrapping her arms around his slender waist. To her surprise, he leant into the embrace. 

They stayed like that for a while before she pulled back, picking up his hand. She moved back so she was sitting against the headboard and pulled Spencer over, patting her lap. He didn’t even give a second thought to lay his head on her lap. His brain could almost stop spinning as he laid there. 

Y/n moved her hand to his hair, threading it through her fingers. It was remarkably soft and fluffy. 

“What happened to you, Spence?” She asked him again. 

With tears still streaming out his eyes he could answer. “It hurt so much, Y/n. He wouldn’t stop it, no matter how much I begged. I was so helpless there.” He choked out, in a broken sentence due to his heavy breathing. 

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m right here.” Y/n comforted again. She tested out the boundaries by running her hand over his cheek and when he leant into her hand she continued to brush the tears off his cheek. “Let it all out.”

“I couldn’t do anything!” Spencer cried. It was the most painful sound she’d ever heard. Someone so composed and always perfect falling apart. He was broken. “I just sat there while he beat me. I can still feel it. When I close my eyes sometimes I see him. It’s so stupid because I know, scientifically, I’m experiencing PTSD but sometimes I feel all the walls coming down on me.”

Y/n’s heart broke for him. “Spencer, it’s not stupid.” He cried even harder at that. 

“I just need to crack the case and save him, Y/n. I’ll never forgive myself if I don’t.”

Y/n moved her hand to rub his back. “I know you feel that way.” She didn’t really know what to say to comfort him. He was so often the one helping everyone else out. 

“I feel so silly for still being scared too.” He mentioned. 

“Oh, Spence, it’s okay. Hankel is dead and you’re safe now.” She soothed him, still rubbing circles in his back.

He was still bawling his eyes out, feeling unbearable sadness. “I know that. But I still see him and I can still remember every second of it.”

“You didn’t deserve any of that.” She told him firmly. “He was sick, I know you know that. You went through the worst things imaginable and you’re so strong.”

He lightly nodded. “Will it get better?”

“Yes, if you keep talking about it. To anyone. JJ?” Y/n suggested. 

“I like talking to you.” He mentioned it, quieter than before. Y/n could finally smile at that. Despite everything, Spencer was still so kind. 

“Good.” She told him as she moved her hand back to his hair. “I could see it was getting to you. With all the similarities in him drugging and abusing his victims. I can’t imagine what you went through but I’m so proud of you.” She continued, meaning every word she told him. 

The tears had stopped coming so fast now. They were still constant but a weaker flow. “I just felt so helpless when I was there.”

Y/n almost chuckled at that. “Spencer, from what I’ve heard you were the one who told the team how to find you. I think you were so brave and I know they’re all so proud of you.” She told him. 

“Thank you.” He murmured as he moved his head in her lap. She continued to comb through his hair. 

They stayed in the exact position for a while. Until, eventually, the tears stopped. 

Spencer then sat up. His cheeks were flushed red as he made eye contact with Y/n. “I’m sorry I completely freaked out.” He nervously rambled out an apology. 

Y/n couldn’t have shaken her head faster. “Spencer Reid, you don’t have to be sorry for anything. Everyone needs someone to talk to.”

“I’ve got to save him, Y/n,” Spencer told her as he moved to get up off the bed, no doubt to go to his makeshift workspace. 

Instead, Y/n tugged on his arm, not letting him move. “I know you’ve got to, Spence. But you can’t do that if you haven’t slept or relaxed in days.” She informed him. He was smart enough, and he had read at least 300 articles on the importance of sleep, to not argue with her. 

“Okay, I’ll sleep. Thanks for coming to see me.” He told her, trying to get her out of the room. 

Y/n noticed. “I don’t think so. You’re stuck with me for the night, buddy.” She told him as she pattered her lap again. 

He looked like he was thinking about putting his head on it but he stopped. “Then you won’t sleep.” He realised.

“Okay then,” Y/n said as she pulled the covers of his bed up and got in. “I hope you’re okay with cuddling.” She was a little worried he wouldn’t be into it, just because of his germaphobic nature. But her worries subsided when he got in next to her and quickly put his head on her chest, 

Y/n moved so she was lying flat on her back with her head on a pillow. Spencer put his own head on her chest and wrapped his arms around her waist like a baby koala would its mother. 

She moved her arm so she could wrap it around Spencer’s torso and pull him closed but he stopped her. “Can you, uh... could you do it to my, um, hair?” He nervously asked. 

Happy to oblige, Y/n moved her hand to his hair and started to run her fingers through it. “If you just want to lie here it’s fine but we can talk too.” She offered him, still unsure of what he needed. Spencer was so used to closing up that he decided to go against what his brain was telling him. 

“My parents,’ He started, “When I was little we didn’t really do touching... no one’s ever hugged me like this.” The thought of a little kid Spencer not getting hugged broke Y/n’s heart again. 

“Is this okay?” She asked, cautious of where his boundaries might lie. 

“Yes.” He hurriedly answered, not wanting her to stop for a second. “I like it. I just didn’t get hugs as a kid from anyone. And as I grew up I learnt more about germs and figured that’s why my parents repealed me.” He spoke slowly and softly like he was half asleep. Maybe he was. “But I like this. It makes me feel better.” He figured. 

“That’s good.” Y/n hummed. “I’m always here for you if you want to talk or just cuddle.” She told him. 

The smile she could feel against her chest warmed her heart. “I’d like that and please don’t stop stroking my hair.” 

She smiled at that. “I won’t.” She meant it as she leant down to place a kiss on his forehead.

[alloftheimaginess]

Your relationship

Warnings: none

• You move in next door to him and that’s when you meet him

• When you meet him he’s completely oblivious to you flirting with him

• And since you aren’t an FBI agent his friends aren’t able to push him and let him know you’re flirting so you spend the first year blatantly flirting with him

• Finally he catches on and it’s not even when you’re trying to flirt you just tell him you like his socks

• Postponed dates

• Even more postponed dates

• A very awkward first date where he rambles on about whatever he’s rambling on about and then he catches himself

• “I’m sorry, someone is usually around to cut me”

• “It’s fine, I don’t mind. I teach third graders so conversations that don’t involve how a goldfish or a hamster died I’ll gladly listen to”

• Spencer still feeling flustered and having a hard shaking it

• So you ramble on about how you sat and read all of the twilight books in one sitting and his confused face makes the story worth sharing

• “It’s a book about vampires and werewolves”

• After every date you want him to kiss you but he doesn’t

• He finally does after your third date

• But with his busy schedule it takes you four months to hey there

• But you don’t care it’s worth it

• About a year in you meet his team and easily bond with them

• Which he absolutely adores

• “I’m going to marry her” he tells Derek to which Derek responds with a smile and lets him know he supports it as long as you date for a little while longer first.

• You waited two more years

• Book store trips

• Cheesy romance novel aisle is where he gets down on one knee

• “Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!”

• “I didn’t even ask you yet”

• “Sorry, sorry. Go ahead”

• An amazing speech about you being “the best woman to ever come into my life”

• Obviously you say yes because why wouldn’t you?

• minimal wedding planning

• Lots of cake tasting and wine parings

• “Let’s go with the banana foster”

• “I was thinking that’s same thing”

• It’s a intimate event with only around 35 guests

• happens exactly six months after he proposes

• Honeymoon in Paris

• “Fais moi l'amour”

• You most definitely get pregnant on the honeymoon

• Horrible morning sickness

• Which gives you away to Penelope almost immediately

• “Oh my god! Oh my god! I call godmom. I’m going to cry”

• Lots of hugs (from Penelope only)

• Being spoiled by Penelope when Spencer is away on a case for days at a time

• You settle on duckies for your baby shower theme

• it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen

• Lots of gifts for the first girl being born into the Bau family

• Way more diapers then you’ll need

• “Yn is in labor!” Penelope yells as soon as the elevators open and she gets in and they all go down

• You decide to do it natural

• Which you regret but it’s too late

• Sixteen hours of labor

• Elise Diana Reid 6 pounds 8 ounces

• Being surrounded by love

• Spencer taking half a year off to give you and Elise nothing but his full attention

• Which results in baby Reid #2

• Even more excitement from Penelope this time

• “Even more godbabies”

• First birthday celebrations

• “You’re never too young to read a good book”

• Baby’s first library

• IT’S A BOY!

• Definitely with the help of an epidural

• 25 hours of labor

• Elliot Reid born at 8 pounds 3 ounces

•Diapers from Elise came in handy

• Once again Spencer takes six months off

• Only this time you’re way more careful

• You do not need another baby right now

[mercy-burning]

My Forever — Part 2

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Spencer and Eve reunite over dinner, and Y/N can’t help but feel like old, strangely familiar feelings are coming back. Category: SMUT (18+) Content: Strong language, sexual themes, use of vibrator, exhibitionism Word Count: 3.4k

MAIN MASTERLIST | SERIES MASTERLIST

NOTE: Thank you all for being so patient with me! After Thanksgiving I just got this huge surge of inspiration, and I feel like writing everything and anything all at once, so I finally got to finish this! I’ve also decided that I need to add another chapter to My Forever, so instead of 4 parts you’ll be getting 5!

———

I've been a nervous wreck all day.

Earlier in the morning I confirmed that last night hadn't actually been a dream, and Spencer verified his upcoming presence at dinner— enthusiastically, I might add...

I find it strange that I seem to be the only one who's nervous about this whole thing. I mean, I can understand why Mom and Adam are less weirded out; Mom made decent points last night, whether I want to accept them or not. To her, Spencer had only broken up with her because he wasn't in love with her anymore, and he was upfront and kind about it. To her, that was likely the best breakup she's ever had. Now she's moved on, she's been happily married for years, and if they're both willing to see each other without any hard feelings and stay friends, why the fuck not?

Only, Spencer and I both know something that she and Adam don't. And while it might be okay for all of us to remain civil, things might start to get a little weird if it comes out that I'm fucking my mom's ex-boyfriend. Or that I've fucked him before, while they were still together.

He seems to think we can pull it off, but it just feels like more of the same of what we did seven years ago. As exhilarating as being with him is, all it does is send me into high alert.

So much so that when he knocks on the door that evening, I jump— actually jump. But not in the way Mom jumps. She's actually excited, launching off the couch next to Adam where she grabs his hand and drags him to the door.

"Oh, I can't wait for you two to meet! This is exciting, isn't it?"

"I'm sure he's awesome," Adam responds, quite genuinely.

I, on the other hand, can't help but keep my hands busy at all times, pulling at a few loose threads of my sweatshirt. I'm also wearing a pair of loose jeans and praying that keeping myself quiet and unassuming will pay off. The last thing I need is Spencer getting distracted.

Speaking of, the second I hear his voice calling my mother's name in a bright, friendly and almost nostalgic way, my stomach lurches. Immediately my instincts are telling me to run and pretend that I'm sick or something— anything to keep from having to deal with this mess.

But that's the thing. It isn't a mess.

In fact, it's such a clean slate that I can practically see the glowing shine radiating from their corner of the room. Hugs and handshakes are exchanged, Names are introduced, and smiles are genuine and unwavering. I feel like if I get thrown in the mix I'll just contaminate them, quickly drowning them in my reservation, and then everything will be ruined.

Still, Mom calls me over, and my legs tread forward despite their hesitation.

When Spencer looks at me, the heat flooding to my face is instantaneous. He greets me with a, "Hey, you," friendly enough, and a smile that nearly makes it impossible to stand. "Thanks for the call."

"Well, it was Mom's idea, so... Thank her."

All three of them laughed at my words, but with them I'd hoped to convey to Spencer just how much I still don't fully approve of this idea.

Whether he gets the message or not, I'm not sure. But his lingering smile obliterates me all the same, and all I can really do now is hope for the best.

———

Turns out, I had been foolish to think anything I could do would be good enough to keep his antics to himself.

Mom and Adam are going into excruciating detail about how they first met, a story I've heard too many times I could practically recite it from memory, when Spencer's hand finds its way to my knee. I suppose it's innocent enough, so at first I don't think much of it.

Again... Foolish.

His long fingers slowly travel inwards and up, until they're drawing patterns on my thigh. Even through thick denim, it makes my skin feel hot.

I gently kick his foot under the table, hoping to get him to knock it off, but the gesture only increases his need for mischief. His hand squeezes the surface of my inner thigh and in the corner of my peripheral I can see him grin a little wider. Mom wouldn't know the difference, and Adam is too caught up looking at her like a lovesick puppy that he wouldn't have picked up on it even if he could.

Minutes go by, I sip gently on the wine in front of me, and Mom finishes her story with bright eyes and nostalgia in her smile as she addresses Spencer.

"God, I'm so sorry. I can't believe I've been talking your ear off this long and you haven't stopped me."

"Oh, it's not a problem, Eve. I'm really glad to see you so happy."

"Well, you don't look too unhappy yourself," she says with a nod. "Are you seeing anyone?"

"Not at the moment," he says, squeezing my thigh again. His thumb swipes gently over a pilled knot in my jeans, and my stomach forms a knot of its own. "But I'm good. School keeps me busy, and things are better than they've been in a while."

"Oh, well that's lovely to hear."

"School, huh?" Adam says. "Eve tells me you used to teach, you still doing that?"

Spencer goes on to talk with Adam about his job and what he used to do before teaching, and all the while I can't help the heat that floods through my body when his hand shifts just a little higher, enough so that his thumb can reach the crease of my thigh.

I try to distract myself by eating as his thumb moves in closer and closer, but if he keeps this up I'm going to end up choking. So instead, I settle on biting my lip and staring down at my fork.

Unsurprisingly, one more kick under the table does nothing to stop him, and in one swift motion, his whole hand manages to cup my crotch without raising suspicion. And all the while, he's speaking easily with Adam like he's done it a million times before, not a hitch in his voice or a single breath out of place.

My breathing, however, is a struggle. I'm trying to keep it steady, but when his middle finger starts to trace the inseam of my jeans, it takes everything I have not to let out a huge whine at the shiver that runs through me.

Right now, the only thing keeping me grounded is the damn fork next to my plate.

Speaking of, Mom's voice rings through the dining room like a siren, and I nearly jump at my name blurting past her lips. "Y/N, you're spaced out and you've hardly touched your food. You feeling okay?"

Spencer's hand retreats entirely, and I feel a weight lift off my chest.

"Yeah," I say, clearing my throat. "Sorry, I'm fine. It's just a little weird seeing you two in the same room again, that's all."

"I understand, sweetheart... But hey, look on the bright side, we're all getting along, right? No hard feelings."

Everyone exchanges glances around the table, and I swear it's like God is playing a sick joke on me. Of course I'm glad Mom is confident that she and her husband can get along with her ex after all these years. But when she doesn't know that he's actually fucking her daughter on the down low, it's unsurprisingly extremely annoying trying to hide my panic the whole time while everyone is getting along swimmingly like nothing is happening behind the curtain. Not to mention exhausting.

And the worst part is, I can't find it in myself to say no. To put a stop to it.

I could very well excuse myself and pretend to be sick. It would be easy enough for me to get out of dinner tonight, or to even tell Spencer before the night is over that I genuinely don't want to keep going like this...

But damn it, I'm right back to seven summers ago, sitting at this exact table while Mom is blissfully unaware of whet me and Spencer are doing...

And it's electrifying, having his attention actually focused on me while he fools everyone into thinking he's paying attention to them. I know that I'm taking up so much space in his brain that he can't help but keep a hand on me at all times. He will do anything, find any way, to touch me and feel my body react to him. Maybe it's a possession thing or maybe he genuinely can't get enough of me, but whatever the case, it does something to the bone-deep parts of my soul l that I can't quite extinguish.

Which is why, when we finally look each other in the eye, I touch him back, hating that I can't get enough of him either. My hand brushes up against his knee and I smile.

"No hard feelings."

———

It's possibly the worst idea Mom has ever had, or possibly the best. Depending on how you look at it.

Though, I have to admit, when she and Adam offered to get the movie room downstairs set up for a spur of the moment movie night, leaving Spencer and I on popcorn duty, my heart sped up like it used to every time I'd get a moment alone with him seven years ago. And judging by the look on his face, I can tell he's feeling the same.

We're putting dishes in the dishwasher when Mom and Adam finally step downstairs, and for a moment, aside from the dishes and the faucet as we rinse them, the room is utterly silent.

It's like every movement I take is on a bed of sheer, thin ice that could give way at any moment. I keep waiting for his weight to come along and drag us under the surface.

But we finish loading the dishwasher, I hand him a towel, and surprisingly he doesn't seem like he's willing to risk exposure.

That is, until he actually takes the towel from me and pulls me into him before I can let go.

Our lips crash together seamlessly, like they already know the way. The towel drops between us and Spencer walks me backwards until my body runs into the kitchen counter. His hands are in my hair, messing up what I'd already done to make it look somewhat unappealing in hopes that he'd retreat from me tonight.

A part of me is ashamed to say it, but I'm really glad it didn't work.

I let myself submit to him once more, opening my mouth for him to kiss me however he pleases. He opts for the sweeter route, using his tongue to meet mine with a gentle, silent declaration of something stronger than just attraction. It's a feeling I haven't experienced in years, and the fact that it's happening under the same roof as before is bringing back a rush of urgency and desperate need to be all-consumed by him.

So my arms sling over his shoulders and pull him closer, willing him to be all over me for as long as he can. His response is a surge forward of the hips, their weight causing my own to buckle and my right leg to lift up. He brings an arm down and grabs my thigh, hoisting it up over his hip, and my ankle presses firmly into his ass, hoping to keep him near. The other leg follows, and soon enough Spencer is lifting me up onto the counter.

My hands find their way down to his belt without thinking, and I can feel him laugh against my lips, pulling away just far enough to take their pressure off of mine.

"What's so funny," I grumble. "If we're gonna do this now, we have to be quick, we don't have time for laughs."

"We're not going to do this now," he corrects, pecking my lips and taking my wrists gently in his hands. "I just wanted to kiss you. Greet you properly."

I don't know why, but that sentiment floods my chest with warmth. And also a bit of stupidity.

"Oh... Right. Sorry."

"Mmm, don't be," he returns with another small laugh. He kisses me again, this time more firmly, and my eyes flutter shut at the sensation. When he pulls away I all but whimper at his absence. "It's cute that you're all excited to see me."

I sigh and jump down from the counter, avoiding his eye as I push past him to grab the pot we need for popcorn. "Yeah, well... Your antics under the table weren't helping."

"Oh, speaking of... I got you something."

I pause on my way to the cupboard, not entirely sure what that has to do with presents. It's entirely possible he's just not great at segueing, but when I see the device in his hand, stretched out towards me, I stop in my tracks.

"What the hell is that?"

"Well," he says with a grin, "I was going to ask you to wear it on the date I have planned for us tomorrow, but... Your mom has impeccable timing."

After a few seconds of silence, I stomp my foot as gently as I can without alerting her. "Spencer, I am not wearing that thing downstairs! Are you kidding?"

"Oh, come on, we've been more... scandalous than this..." The amused lilt in his voice makes me want to knock out those pretty teeth. "Besides, you were just willing let me fuck you on the kitchen counter... This is more discreet."

I know he's right, but still... I'm not sure I want to let him control a vibrator in my pants for however long this movie we end up watching is...

Or do I?

The look on his face and the fire settling deep within my core are more convincing than I'd like. But they're like magnets, pulling me down the path of destruction... Beautiful, glorious destruction.

Against my better judgement, I snatch the device from his hand and sigh. "Let me get changed... You know where the popcorn is."

Before I can walk past him, he stops me and presses another kiss to my temple. "Can you get away for the whole day tomorrow?"

I can't help the smile that spreads over my face. "Depends... How easy are you gonna go on me tonight?"

"Hmmm... I'll see what I can do."

———

"I'll see what I can do," my ass...

This movie hasn't been on for more than twenty minutes, and I'm already near the point of orgasm. It doesn't help that It's incredibly hot down here, even with what little central air comes through the vents. I want to spread out in a chair or the couch to cool myself off, but with people around and this fucking vibrator up my cunt, I'm stuck cowering in the corner of the couch, pretending to cuddle up into a pillow so it just looks like I'm tired.

I suppose I could excuse myself for bed, say I'm tired, and then take the damn thing out, but knowing Spencer, he'll sweetly tell me goodnight and then continue to control the damn thing until I can get away to take it out. Or I'll get a text telling me to keep it in, or something else...

Just before I can decide what to do, I feel the coil snap and send me into a frenzy of shivers. I bite down onto my hand to keep from making any sound, and nearly yelp when the vibrations turn up a notch.

"Hon, you okay?" Mom leans in and whispers. "You look like you're freezing."

"Y—Yep, just cold... I'm alright though."

"You sure?"

"M-hm."

She pats my knee and then turns back to Adam, and I can see Spencer grinning on the other side of me. He's sitting in the lounge chair in the corner of the room, a hand in his pocket while the other props his chin up. His eyes are glued to the TV, but he glances at me for a split second before turning the vibrator off completely.

Relief washes over me, and then a quick blanket of anxiety as I wait for the inevitable moment where he turns it on again, most likely at the highest setting.

I can almost hear his voice in my head, saying, "You really think so low of me, princess?" and I almost blurt out, "Yes," in his direction.

But somehow it's like he can read my mind and he wants to prove me wrong. Or maybe I'm just an awful judge of character. Because minutes and more minutes go by, the movie is almost over, and I haven't felt anything at all except for a low vibration during a rather intense action sequence.

I glance over at him to see that he's perfectly content, watching the movie and paying me no mind. Not even a grin on his face or a hand in his pocket.

I'm out of the woods.

Well... At least I'd thought so.

Just when the movie ends and Adam says the command that turns the lights back on, the vibrator clicks on a medium setting, and I hang my head, cursing the universe for bringing Spencer back into my life.

"What'd you think?" Adam asks brightly towards his direction. "It's one of my favorites."

"You know, I can't believe I hadn't seen it before. It's good."

Mom laughs. "I can. You didn't watch any movies with me unless they were in Russian."

"Guilty... But be fair, I don't watch much of anything these days. You know me, I'm more of a reader."

The three of them continue to talk about books, all of which I couldn't tell if I'd heard of or not since I was too focused on trying not to moan out loud. The longer the conversation goes on the more I'm convinced Spencer is only dragging it farther to prolong my torture. More than likely he's trying to get me to come again, and honestly it's looking like that won't be a problem.

I just hope he can keep Mom and Adam engaged in deep enough conversation that they won't notice and say anything to me about the way I'm tensing.

I'm coming once again in no time, and this time I can't help the small whimper that comes from my mouth. So I do my best to cover it up with a stretch and a yawn, signaling my end for the night.

Spencer seems to get the hint and switches the vibrator off when I stand up.

"As... stimulating as this conversation is, I need to get to bed before I fall asleep down here," I say. Mom and Adam laugh even though they don't understand the irony of my word choice.

"Yeah, I should probably get going, too. Long day ahead of me tomorrow. Let me walk you up?"

I make my way up the stairs while the others say their goodbyes, and part of me prepares for another potential burst of vibrations between my thighs. The only pulsing I feel when I get to the kitchen however, is the loud beating of my heart when it jumps at his sudden touch on my shoulder.

"Why so jumpy, princess?" he asks amusedly.

I punch his arm. "Stop it! I'm taking this thing out and then I'm going to bed, and you can forget about your date tomorrow."

"What, this thing?"

The vibrations start again, only for a few seconds, but it's enough to make me hit him again. "I'm serious!"

"Okay, okay," he says, slinging an arm around my shoulder and kissing the top of my head. "Trust me, I could have been way harder on you in there."

I smile as we walk to the front door. "Yeah, I know... Still sucked though. I was on edge the whole time, wondering when you were gonna torture me."

He tugs me closer and spins me to meet him chest to chest. "That's kinda the whole point." And then with a love-drunk, beautiful grin, he leans in and kisses me softly. My body is aching at this point, but it still finds a way to fall into him with ease.

"So what do you say... Think you can spare some time for me tomorrow?"

"Like I could ever say no to you," I whisper against his lips, kissing him once more before making myself pull away. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, princess.”

———

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[shemarmooresfedora]

Protective of the Princess

Summary: Jo comes home with some unexpected news and Spencer isn’t a fan. (This is a stand-alone one-shot of my completed ‘Rebuilding Family’ series)

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Content/Warnings: mentions of little kids kissing, spencer freaking out, fluff

Word Count: 1.3k

A/N: based on this ask from @reidsbookclub and this ask from @samuel-de-champagne-problems

Masterlist

Spencer made it clear to Jo she could be anything she wanted to be growing up.

She would change her mind about her career path quite often but Spencer was always supportive. When she wanted to be a vet, she had a bunch of different stuffed animals to practice on. When she wanted to be an astronaut, you all built a rocket ship out of a cardboard box. When she wanted to be a scientist, Spencer got her a book set of kid’s science books.

One afternoon after school, Jo hopped up on the kitchen counter as Spencer was making her a snack and you were playing with the twins on the floor.

“Daddy, I can’t go to work any more,” Jo stated.

“Why not, Princess?” Spencer asked, sliding apple slices and peanut butter in front of her.

“I have a baby and husband now,” Jo explained.

“You got a baby and husband in one day?” you questioned.

“Thomas kissed me and then we got married under the slide at recess and now we have a baby. I don’t have time for work, Daddy,” Jo sounded exasperated.

“Thomas did WHAT?” Spencer gaped.

“He kissed me like you kiss Mommy every morning before work,” she demonstrated the little peck on her baby doll.

Spencer’s eyes widened, “Y/N, please help.”

You stood from the blanket where the twins were having tummy time.

“Jo, how about you wait until you’re a little older to start kissing people? A hug or high five can show love to. You can try that next time,” you suggested.

“Daddy says kissing is safer than handshakes though,” Jo reminded you.

“Nope! I lied! Kissing is very dangerous,” Spencer shook his head empathically, “Don’t kiss.”

“But we have a baby together,” Jo held up her baby doll.

“I see that. What’s their name?” you asked.

“This is Derek,” she informed you.

“You named him after your uncle? That’s very sweet,” you smiled.

“I want a real one so I can name it Penelope. I want to have a big belly like Mommy used to have. How are babies made?” she questioned.

Spencer grasped your hand, looking very pale, “Y/N, I need to lie down.”

“One second, love,” you squeezed his hand before turning back to Jo, “You can’t have a baby until you’re much older. Then, I’ll explain it to you, okay?”

Jo nodded.

“I need to take Daddy to bed. He’s feeling a little sick,” you told her, “You can play with the twins.”

“Actually,” Spencer slipped his hand out of yours, “I’m going to go for a drive. I’ll be back in a bit.”

You looked at him curiously as he leaned in for a kiss but then retreated under the watchful eyes of Jo.

You followed him into the entryway as he laced his converse up, “Where are you going?”

“I’ve never heard of a Thomas before until now. I need Penelope to check this kid out.”

“Check this kid out?” you laughed, “What are you expecting to find? A nine year old with a criminal record?”

“I need to make sure my daughter is safe,” he looked up at you seriously.

“Okay,” you relented, “You’re a great dad albeit very protective,” you kissed him goodbye.

“Are we going to start having to only kiss in private now?” you smirked.

“I don’t want her seeing and copying it at school,” Spencer sighed, “The last thing I want is to get a phone call from her teacher that our daughter needs to stop kissing people.”

“Okay, sneaking around could be fun anyways,” you smiled, giving him another kiss, “Tell the team I say hi.”

-

“Who does this Thomas kid think he is?” Spencer grumbled to himself as he was in the elevator, “Kissing my sweet little precious daughter. I should have him arrested. Maybe I don’t have the grounds for an arrest but I can show him my badge and scare him off.”

His ranting stopped as he knocked on Penelope’s door.

“Who is it?” she chirped.

“Spencer,” he replied, “I brought you a croissant.”

“It’s open!”

Spencer opened the door and handed her the paper bag.

“And it’s still warm!” she squealed, “You must really love me.”

“I do but I also need a favor,” he spoke.

“Name it, boy wonder,” she readied herself at her keyboard.

“I need you to look up a boy named Thomas in Jo’s class.”

“Is this kid bullying her?” she gritted her teeth, “I swear to god, I will reign hell down on this kid if he is.”

“No, it’s the opposite actually. He kissed her,” Spencer sighed.

“She already got her first kiss?” Penelope gasped.

“I know! I didn’t even have mine until 25,” Spencer replied.

Penelope clicked away at her keys, “We’ve got two Thomases in her class but according to the attendance record, Thomas Jacobson was out sick today meaning Thomas Bennett is our guy.”

“What do we know about him?” Spencer asked, crouching down to look at Penelope’s screen.

“Plays on the town soccer team, has an allergy to shellfish, good report card,” Penelope stated.

“Anything else? Any visits to the principals? Sketchy friends?” he questioned.

“I guess the sketchiest friend he has would be his imaginary friend named Robby the cowboy according to his mom’s facebook. He’s got a squeaky clean school record.”

“Let me see what this kid looks like,” Spencer desperately demanded.

Penelope gave him a look.

“Please,” he added.

The group class pictures of the past 3 years popped up on to Penelope’s screen. Each year, Jo and Thomas were standing next to each other smiling and laughing in various poses.

“He doesn’t look like much of a threat to me,” Penelope stated.

“Why hasn’t she ever asked for him to come over on a playdate?” he asked.

“She was probably scared her dad was going to embarrass her,” Penelope chuckled.

“She’s in 3rd grade! No boys!” Spencer crossed his arms.

“That rule is setting you up for a rebellious stage later in life,” Penelope rolled her eyes.

“So I just let this happen?” Spencer sighed, dropping into the chair next to Penelope.

“Yes, you’re supposed to protect her but not from nice boys who make her happy.”

“But she’s just my sweet little girl,” Spencer started to tear up.

“And she always will be but you need to let her live her life,” Penelope explained.

“I know. Thanks Penelope.”

-

You heard the car pull in while you were making dinner. You lowered the setting on the stove and made your way over to the door.

“Hey,” you greeted him, wrapping your arms around him.

“Hi,” he snuggled into the crook of your nest.

“Did you find Thomas on the FBI’s most wanted list?” you joked.

“No, he’s a good kid,” Spencer sighed in defeat, “I just don’t like the thought of her growing up. Then, she’ll eventually have to leave us.”

“That’s what being a parent is,” you whispered, “You love them, care for them, and prepare them for the world as best you can but then you have to set them free. But, I have good news for you,” you smiled.

“What?”

“You’re stuck with me forever,” you grinned.

“Thank god,” Spencer squeezed you tighter.

“Daddy!” Jo ran into the room, “Lion King is playing in theaters tonight! We need to go!”

“Okay, Princess,” he looked to you for support and you squeezed his hand, “Do you think Thomas would want to come?”

“Yes! He loves Lion King!” Jo exclaimed, running to go get ready.

“You’re a great dad,” you reminded him once again.

“I’m still going to be watching this kid like a hawk,” Spencer admitted.

“As you should,” you grinned, kissing him.

Soon enough, Jo came home next week saying she wanted to be a congresswoman and they were back to their old adventures.

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