#ted theodore logan headcanons

[ghcstpyre]

*•.¸♡ nsfw alphabet with ted logan x f!reader. MINORS BEGONE!

cw: cis female reader, obviously nsfw themes, drug use (weed)

A - AFTERCARE. (what they're like after sex)

so. many. cuddles. cuddling is always one of the first things ted wants to do after sex, regardless of how sticky and/or sweaty you both are. and it's only once you decide you feel a bit too gross that he finally peels himself away from you to fetch a towel to wipe you down, telling you how amazing and beautiful you are, how much he loves you.

B - BODY PART. (their favourite body part on you and on themself)

ted is a boob guy. doesn't matter the size, shape, or colour. every chance he gets, he's touching and groping them and he especially loves teasing your nipples during foreplay or when he's trying to rile you up.

as for himself, ted loves his hair! he takes really good care of it and it's unbelievably soft. 

C - CUM. (anything to do with cum)

listen. ted is a sprightly young man. he's horny and so into you, when he cums, he cums a lot. he can go multiple times too - most of the time he's still hard post-orgasm and can't help but push it back inside for an immediate round 2.

creampies make him a bit nervous so he usually only does them when he's either a) stoned, b) drunk, or c) so consumed with lust he can't bring himself to pull out. ted's favourite place to cum is on your chest or in your mouth.

D - DIRTY SECRET. (a dirty secret of theirs)

ted is a panty sniffer. if you're in a relationship, he will 100% steal your panties and press them against his face while he gets off. alternatively, he'll wrap them around his cock and cum in them.

if you're just friends or only hooking up, he'll be incredibly tempted to steal a pair. but he's a respectful guy and knows that would be crossing a boundary, so instead he just fantasises.

E - EXPERIENCE. (how experienced are they?)

teddy boy isn't experienced. at all. the closest he's gotten to some action begins and ends at making out and some light over-the-clothes groping with a girl at a school dance when he was 16.

having said that though, he is a really good kisser. like, leaving you weak at the knees kind of kisser. and he's a fast learner, so if you wanted to teach ted a thing or two in the bedroom, it wouldn't take him long to get the hang of it!

F - FAVOURITE POSITION.

ted thinks you look amazing from every angle, but his favourite is cowgirl. he loves loves loves it when you ride him - on the bed, on the sofa, front and back of the wyld stallyns van, anywhere it's viable. he loves being able to see your pretty face while he's inside you, grip your hips, and watch your tits bounce as you fuck yourself on him.

G - GOOFY. (are they more serious during the moment or are they humorous?)

he can be serious if the moment calls for it! but ted much prefers being able to laugh and be a little silly. he doesn't get down on himself or frustrated when something doesn't quite work and will instead crack a joke, laugh with his partner and carry on. he wouldn't be able to be with someone who wants it serious all the time - that's way too much pressure.

H - HAIR. (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes etc?)

unlike bill, ted is a hairy guy. he prefers to keep his face and upper body shaved, but leaves his armpits, snail trail and pubes (which he keeps trimmed). he doesn't bother with his arms and legs. his body hair and beard grow back really fast so he tries to keep on top of shaving at least once a week or every other week, but that 5 o’clock shadow comes in real quick.

I - INTIMACY. (how are they during the romantic aspects of the moment?)

ted is a complete hopeless romantic. he loves love, and he loves making love. going slow, savouring the moment, gentle touches and caresses, hand holding and kissing and “I love you babe”s all the way through. ted has so so so much love and affection to give, so you better be ready for the most lovey-dovey lovemaking you'll ever get.

J - JACK OFF. (do they masturbate?)

oh yes. he's a young, horny guy so he definitely does his fair bit of jerking off. probably slightly more than average, but it becomes a lot harder to get away with after moving in with bill.

at his dad's house he had his own room and the privacy to do it whenever the need took hold. after moving in with bill he has to wait until he's home alone, or does it in the shower. he once tried to do it while bill was fast asleep, but it felt too weird and invasive and he felt gross as hell doing it with his best friend only a few metres away.

K - KINK. (one of more of their kinks)

ted isn't really a kinky guy. but he is geeky and isn't immune to the lure of a bodacious babe in cosplay. semi-public sex in his van too - one of ted's favourite things is driving to a scenic remote spot, smoking up in the back of his van and getting it on. he likes the risk of it, but would absolutely dissolve on the spot from embarrassment if the two of you ever did get caught.

L - LOCATION. (favourite places to get it on)

i’ve already touched on this, but ted loves going at it in the wyld stallyns van. his top three in order are the van, the bed and then the sofa. one of the things he fantasises about is doing a crazy successful gig and pulling you into the van for a quickie between sets. he doesn't know why, but fucking in the van sort of makes him feel a bit like a rock star.

M - MOTIVATION. (what turns them on, what gets them going)

if you're ever not wearing a bra beneath your top, ted is going to have a hard time keeping his hands to himself. he also very much enjoys the miniskirt with knee-high socks combo. but most of all, he loves a girl in a leather jacket; it doesn't matter what else you could be wearing, because all ted will be thinking about is how badass and hot his babe looks in a leather jacket.

N - NO. (something they wouldn't do, their turn offs)

ted is down to try pretty much anything (within reason) at least once. aside from the obvious few, one thing he definitely isn't into is threesomes/sharing you with someone else. while he hides it very well, ted can be insecure thanks to the years of his dad chipping away at his self confidence. the idea of you wanting to be intimate with someone else while you're with him just doesn't sit right - why would you need anyone else when he has so much love to give you? ted wants to be the only one to make you feel good and special!

O - ORAL. (preference in giving or receiving, skill etc)

he's addicted to eating you out. ted could get off on the taste of you alone (and has done. many times). he absolutely loves the feeling of you squirming and rocking on his tongue, and despite the lack of experience, he's actually really good at it. more often than not, he makes a point to make you cum on his tongue before you get down to anything else.

not to say that he doesn't enjoy receiving head. the sight of you down on your knees with your mouth working over the length of him is permanently burned into his brain, and cumming in your mouth is one of his favourite things. thank god for the existence of 69ing!

P - PACE. (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual?)

both! ted is never quite rough with you - the last thing he wants is to accidentally hurt you. he'll go fast and will manhandle you a bit more than usual if he's pent up or if you're both feeling up for a quick fuck. but if you're making love, he'll obviously go slower and take his time.

Q - QUICKIE. (their opinions on quickies, how often etc)

ted loves a quickie. usually at the most inconvenient of times, too. like right before a family event, before (or during) a house party, or before bill comes back to the apartment after going out to grab a few things from the shop. again, the risk of being caught is thrilling for him, but he also loves seeing how quick and how many times he can make you cum in that short span of time.

R - RISK. (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc)

as mentioned somewhere above, ted will try pretty much anything at least once. if you suggest something new, chances are he's down to give it a go.

S - STAMINA. (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

this boy has staminaaaaaa. he can't do a set of push-ups for shit, but he'll fuck and fuck and fuck as long as you're up for it. he'll cum, and most of the time he'll still be hard and immediately ready for another round. if he isn't still hard, he'll finger you or eat you out until you cum again, by which point he's hard again and ready to go.

he never lasts long each round though. everything about you just feels too good!

T - TOYS. (do they own any toys? do they use them on their partner or on themselves?)

ted doesn't own any toys himself, but if you wanted to start introducing them in the bedroom he'd be down for it. things like vibrators and/or dildos to use on you, or even a fleshlight or cockring for himself if you suggested it. the latter would take a bit of convincing though.

U - UNFAIR. (how much they like to tease)

he's never mean and always follows through on his teasing, but he loves to do it. he loves riling you up with little things: a hand on your waist that slowly slides up your ribs to brush his fingers against the underside of your breast while you walk through the mall, pulling you close while you sit, stoned on a couch at a house party, to whisper dirty things in your ear. 

V - VOLUME. (how loud they are and the noises they make)

ted struggles to be quiet. when he gets the opportunity to be loud, he isn't shy about it. ted wants you to know how you make him feel, whether it's words of praise or moaning. he isn't a grunter, but he'll groan.

W - WILD CARD. (a random headcanon)

sometimes ted will set aside an entire weekend for the both of you to bake weed brownies, get high and stick a bunch of nerdy movies on. but you're both only half watching, because you spend the whole time fucking and lovemaking with breaks in between for snacks and naps and cuddling.

X - XRAY. (what's going on under those clothes?)

for a guy who can barely do 5 push-ups, ted is surprisingly toned. it's all for show though and he mostly works on his arms and chest. he's got a cute squishy tummy!

now for the part of this you're obviously waiting for. yes, his dick is big. about 7-8 inches, slightly bigger than average girth. curves upwards and he's a shower not a grower.

Y - YEARNING. (how high is their sex drive?)

ted has a high sex drive. the pining, the yearning, the thirsting is all real. it's your fault for being so cute and looking so good all the time, even when you've just woken up with messy hair and drool at the corner of your mouth.

Z - ZZZ. (how quickly do they fall asleep after the deed?)

it really depends on how sleepy he is beforehand, where you are, how high he is, how snuggly the post-sex cuddles are and how many times he came/how many rounds it's been. if there's any combination of those things, chances are ted is dozing off pretty quick. whether it's a quick power nap or a full on sleep depends on what time of day it is too!

[brat-pack-it-up-boys]

Biblically accurate photo of me if headcanoning any male fictional character I like as transfem was illegal

[butterfly-lies-chase-them-away]

Hey! Could you do a headcanon for Keanu Reeves' characters, where the (female) reader is like Nimona, in terms of powers and personality?

If not that's ok!

Thanks!

Headcanon for Keanu Reeves' Characters with a Nimona-like (Shapeshifting powers and a bit of a playful personality) Reader: A/N: Ended up doing some homework for this one, lol. I really liked Nimona's character so this was really cute. I did my best and I hope you enjoy :)

John Wick: John Wick couldn't believe his eyes the first time he witnessed your shapeshifting abilities. It was during a mission where he found himself in a tight spot, and that's when you showed up in your badass glory. He had heard whispers about someone who could change their form at will, but nothing prepared him for the sight of you seamlessly transforming from a black cat to a wolf and then into a hawk in a matter of seconds. To John, your personality was a perfect match for your powers. You had that same unyielding determination that John had, but you added a touch of whimsy and playfulness to his stoic demeanor. You loved to mess with your targets by taking on absurd or terrifying forms, keeping them on their toes. John couldn't help but be amused by your antics, even in the direst situations. Together, you formed a formidable duo, combining his legendary gun-fu skills with your shape-shifting prowess. Your teamwork was unmatched, and the criminal underworld learned to fear both John Wick and the enigmatic shape-shifting partner who toyed with their expectations.

Ted "Theodore" Logan: Bill and Ted were used to strange things happening, but when they met you, it was a whole new level of weird. With your shapeshifting abilities, you could turn into any historical figure or famous musician at the drop of a hat. You were always up for crazy adventures and loved to jam with Bill and Ted on their wild time-traveling journeys. With your remarkable shapeshifting talents, you seamlessly became a substitute for Ted whe he wasn’t confident about a crucial history test. Your mimicry of Ted's mannerisms and speech was so uncanny that even Bill couldn't tell the difference so taking the test would be no problem. Ted couldn’t thank you enough for helping him like that.  Your free-spirited, playful nature meshed perfectly with Ted's outlook on life. Together, you created a most excellent, time-traveling band, bringing music and laughter to every era you visited.

John Constantine: John Constantine's expertise in dealing with demons and the occult made him a formidable force. His life was filled with danger and darkness until he encountered you. Constantine was no stranger to the supernatural, but your abilities were a new kind of magic that intrigued and perplexed him. Meeting you on one of his occult investigations, he couldn't help but be impressed by your capacity to turn into different creatures. With your ability to shapeshift at will, became a mysterious and unpredictable ally in John's battle against the forces of darkness. Your transformations often surprised him, but he quickly learned to appreciate the unique advantages you brought to your dangerous encounters. Your playful personality was a refreshing contrast to Constantine's brooding demeanor. You'd change into various forms to distract John when he was particularly stress, getting a much needed laugh out of him. Over time, John Constantine found himself drawn to your free spirit, even though he'd never admit it. Your ability to bring a little chaos into his world made him question the constant darkness that had shrouded his life. Together, you faced the horrors of the supernatural realm, and your shapeshifting powers and fearless nature added a touch of whimsy to your relentless fight against the unknown.

[mangoob]

Happy pride AND bill and ted day, the most bodacious holiday

[musickool]

Headcanon: Holiday Gifts for Keanu's characters.

𝐻𝐸𝐴𝐷𝐶𝐴𝑁𝑂𝑁 ス ˚ ₊ ‧꒰ ꒱ ‧ ₊˚

ℎ𝑜𝑙𝑖𝑑𝑎𝑦 𝑔𝑖𝑓𝑡𝑠 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑘𝑒𝑎𝑛𝑢 𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑠 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠:

𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑙𝑜𝑔𝑎𝑛

the *stoner accent* murst happy cheery boy on xmas!

he loves, LOVES gifts

christmas is one of his most favourite holidays, or in fact, IS his favourite holiday; halloween just being a close second

not just cause of the food

or the snow

the bodacious music or jolly vibes

or the free school holidays so he won't need to do stupid bogus history homework

but because of the presents!

ted would absolutely love if you gifted him something for christmas

it doesn't have to be elaborate or big, but something that a neurodivergent (/j) rock-enthusiast weird kid like him would like

custom guitar picks, comic books, a bucket of tutti-fruity bubblegum & cheese puffs, cute little stickers, fruit-flavoured candy (not too much though as they hurt his teefies), a nintendo gameboy, drawing books....

he'd also like makeup, like black eyeliner & eyeshadow and a couple of nail polish so him and bill can use for their wyld stallyns performances

gift him some eddie van halen posters, cds, keyrings, trinkets, or any of that paranphelia and he'll worship you for life

oh yeah, he don't play around with his eddie van halen

less you forget that

he'll also love tapes and cds and merch of other rock bands he adores

RUBIX CUBE! he'll love a mean rubix cube as his personal fidget toy 🥺

ted's very easy to please, just don't buy him an air supply or beatles vinyl album

𝑗𝑜ℎ𝑛 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑒

antithesis of ted

this man is the grunge adaptation of scrooge, but with less hate and more indifference

doesn't really care about xmas

mostly thinks it's for kids

giving gifts to this guy will be a little bit hard because this man is such a depressed little nihilist sometimes

he'll scoff and bluff, but deep down his emotions speaks otherwise

he never really states what he like or anything personal about him - he's a very private man with only one thing on his mind (lyke idk saving the world from satan and the apocalypse ???)

but what you do know about him is that this man is a chronic smoker

john would definitely fw a silver plated lighter

like the vivienne westwood ones

or a custom black one with his initials on it

he also drinks a lot of whiskey

jack daniel's? jim beam bourbon? jameson?

pair that up with a leather hip flask and he's good to go

silver jewellery type of guy? mhm!

he'd love a cross chain necklace

like deep-silver cross/crucifix pendant ones

would look so fucking cool on him

silver accessories always look so hot on daddy constantine

other than that, nothing much

he's not invested in xmas but he doesn't hate it

his mind will be more occupied on demon hunting and existential brainrots than that

yet he still has a soft spot (secretly) so xmas with him won't be so bleeping bad

𝑗𝑜ℎ𝑛 𝑤𝑖𝑐𝑘

pretty normal about xmas

celebrating with him would be so freaking wholesome though

you're so used to seeing john as his stoic dilf self that him being all lovely with you during this jolly season would be a fever dream

giving him gifts would be, again, pretty normal

he's a simple guy, and already rich enough to buy himself whatever, after all, so your xmas shopping spend will be looking pretty alright

john is a traditional manly man so his gifts would be of that orient

he's also a bit old so keep that in mind...

brown leather-strapped watch, woody oak cologne, men's grooming set, a brand new dog that won't randomly disappear after a few months

john is a bookworm, he'd love some good ol' classic fiction novels and philosophical/critical/mindfuck books to open up and out his mind

he's a handy man so a brand-new toolbox would be nice

he's also a lover of whiskey and wine, so again, some jack daniel's or bourbon and malboc or pinot noir

this would be the funniest shit ever but please gift this man a pencil as a joke

i swear he'll be so oblivious at first but when he clocks, this mf will death stare you like hell whilst you try so hard to not burst into laughter

but on a wholesome note, a ring will put a smile right back onto that man's face

like cute couple rings you and him can wear, like he'll smile so hard

a heart locket necklace with a picture of you and him inside

oh he'll absolutely die inside

john's such a sucker for classic romance, you don't understand

he'll love vinyl records of 70s and 80s vintage classics, taking him back to his younger days

john will cherish these well... 💌

𝑗𝑜ℎ𝑛𝑛𝑦 𝑠𝑖𝑙𝑣𝑒𝑟ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑑

the very antithesis of ted

this man is scrooge

does not not care about xmas and probably never will

"mindless fucking consumerism"

he definitely thinks that shit is for kids

gifts for this guy will be as hard as an harvard acceptance letter

90% of the time this man is never really happy

he's either miserable or annoying or insulting or all at the same time

he would, however, accept it, if it's from you

but johnny never tells personal information

he's a very egotistical individual so the most personal you'll get from him is the edge of how big his c*ck is (*facepalms.png*)

𝑟𝑢𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑡 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑠ℎ𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑎

another happy cheery boy on xmas

and another favourite himbo of mine 💘

he obviously loves xmas

it's the only time he won't have to be digging under trash heaps for diamonds

he's a very weird and random kid so you know he'll like anything

finding a xmas present for him would be easy cause as long as the shit's entertaining, he's pretty much on board

and it's the 80s, so what really can a broke teenage runaway enjoy back then?

but anyways, that's whatever

rupert would definitely like these as gifts: comic books, candy, shakespeare novels, an eight ball, rubix cube, wristbands, money, a crown (???)-

SLIME! give the boy some green slime to play with! (helps with his stims)

*murmuring* why can i imagine him in a skir- yeah give this boy a skirt

and a skateboard

gnarly combination

𝑠ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑒 𝑓𝑎𝑙𝑐𝑜/𝑗𝑢𝑙𝑖𝑎𝑛 𝑚𝑒𝑟𝑐𝑒𝑟

basic as fuck

these dudes are like the hallmarks of xmas

both are different genres of white men in hallmark-esque movies

standard white guy, 30-something year old millennial who's into sports and having a beer with the boys vs twink stock image standard white man who's a doctor and every old karen white woman's dream come true

one, however, is more generic and conventionally attractive hallmark white male than the other (julian)

shane's a manly man so he'd probably like some fishing equipment or men's grooming kit or some kind of sports team merch

he'd also like those beer keg stands or mini fridges where he can put his infinite supply of heineken or guiness inside

a handy man also so a nice new toolbox too

julian...... yeah julian i don't actually know about

he's probably just bisexual or something, idk-

that's about it.

[parvulous-writings]

Bill and Ted Neurodivergency Headcanons

Just some little headcanons that have been bouncing back and forth in my mind recently! Very short, I just wanted to get my thoughts down and out there to be honest

Not my gif

Bill and Ted both have AuDHD (Autism and ADHD), but to varying degrees.

My reasoning is thus: they are both impulsive, stim a lot together, and are at times slow to wrap their heads around certain things, unless it truly interests them. (Such as their interest in launching their band, vs their ability to retain anything they learn in history up until being face-to-face with it). I believe they may also have echolalia - they both use "dude" and similar terms frequently - and whilst these were of course popular terms when the original two films released, the pair carry these phrases well into their adult life, and since they still spend so much time around each other I believe it may be because they're just endlessly bouncing off one another.

Not to mention the fact that they stopped being sneaking in the Tudor Castle to be nerds about Star Wars, completely disregarding their task at hand until Ted falls down the stairs. .... And that they play 20 questions whilst falling down a hole.

Also not to mention the fact the amount of lyrics that they are able to recite at the drop of a hat? Their knowledge of Rock is immeasurable - because it's a shared special interest.

I'm not sure if I have any specific evidence of this (None comes to mind immediately) - but I have a sneaking suspicion that of the two; in Ted, his autism is more prominent, and in Bill, it's his ADHD.

I think it's reasonable to assume that neither of the boys have a diagnosis until later in life - by that point though there aren't exactly many resources for them, and they've already got a somewhat functioning support system (mainly one another, and of course, their wives whilst we're thinking about it). Bill probably tried to take meds at one point, but came off of them after about 3-4 months due to the headaches and loss of sleep that he started to suffer with. Ted was never prescribed meds, even in adulthood.

Going back to childhood/teen years, I don't think anyone really had many suspicions that they had AuDHD, simply because their interests and hobbies were relatively mainstream. If anyone did have the thought that something "may not be right", it would probably be Ted's dad, but he wouldn't have gone to the doctor about the fact. He more considers it a disciplinary issue - I.e, the fact that himself or any tutors haven't been as rigid or harsh as they should be to keep Ted in line, and on the right path to success.

In later life, though, I think it might be more obvious. They go more into less mainstream instruments when they bring in the theremin to their music - not only showing their devotion to music and all it's parts and genres, but also their fixation. (I don't know many people who know or listen to the theremin or music it containing it besides myself). Their inability or unwillingness to change their mannerisms, also, I think is a sign. They don't like change.

I may update/add to these at a later date, but these are my ideas on Bill and Ted's neurospicy situation - I personally think they are AuDHD as mentioned, and that may just be me projecting onto them, but at the same time I don't think there's any chance that these two are neurotypical - if you have any thoughts, feel free to share them!!

[trashvampiree]

love how Bill has this random image of polar bears just like on his shelf above his bed, what a king

[6lostgirl6]

Can you do an headcanon about Bill and Ted X Nerdy! Reader, please? 🙏❤️

Poly!Bill and Ted With Nerdy!Reader HCs

TW: few curse words

You all met when the teacher assigned you as their partner during a project because you were doing well in the class and they were...not.

Spending time with them, you all quickly realized how much you all had in common with each other.

Bill and Ted were instantly in love, confiding in each other about their feelings and realizing that they both wanted to date you.

Which wasn't a problem, they were the first boys that liked the same things you did and it isn't hard to fall for them with their adorable nature.

It was only a few months before you all actually went on a date.

While they may not be nerds, Bill and Ted are complete dorks. You would fit right in with this relationship with them. 

If you're a nerd that enjoys science-fiction based media, Star Wars for example, that's extra brownie points in their book.

Bill and Ted love Star Wars, so if you loved it as well, they would be so happy and you'll would watch it together at least three times. 

Yes, that means you will also be quoting scenes all the time.

In the relationship, you're the one that is more academically attuned. That's the difference between you and your boyfriends. 

Be prepared to be their designated tutor when they have assignments, projects, and exams. 

Don't worry if they're not trying to study, they appreciate your help and take your tutoring to heart. They try so hard in tests to shoe that they have been listening and your tutoring has been helping. 

Whenever they do great on a test, they are extremely proud and tell you all about it, shoving the papers in your face and saying they couldn't have done it without their babe.

If you wear glasses, they find it so damn adorable. 

If your glasses were slipping down your face while you're studying, Ted will quietly push your glasses up for you and give you a big smile when you thank him.

If you're prone to breaking your glasses, Bill will always carry around a spare for you. 

One time he broke them though and you had to be blind for a day until you could get new ones. 

You explained how annoying it is for your glasses to always get dirty and one day Bill and Ted thought of getting you a gift to take care of that issue. 

They thought it was a good idea to give you a damn Windex bottle. 

You: Uh…Windex? 

Bill: Yeah babe, it's supposed to be the most bodacious glass cleaner! :)

Ted: So, we thought we would get you some! You like it? :D 

You: Guys…this is for shit like windows. They’ll fuck up my glasses.

Bill and Ted: :0

If you have a subject or source of media that you are obsessed with and have substantial knowledge on it, they are very supportive and would love to know everything that you know.

Literally, could sit for hours while listening to you gush about your favorite subjects that entertain you.

If they’re video games and board games, they would love to play with you. 

They always play arcade games whenever they wanted to let off some steam but now they can try out yours.

Especially if it’s Dungeons & Dragons, it becomes their obsession and want to play with you after band practice. 

[ghcstpyre]

Ted’s first joint headcanons, please 🥹

Also, imagine shotgunning a hit with Ted 👄💨👄🫠🫠🫠

it's time for the resident stoner to write some stoner!ted headcanons. i feel like this is becoming my staple lmao i love it

cw: drug use (weed), underage drug use and underage drinking (only at the beginning), shotgunning

also i feel like i need to say this but obviously i don't condone doing drugs or drinking alcohol while under 18. this is fictional and all my own personal headcanons :)

ted (and by extension, bill) were 16 the first time they tried weed. they'd somehow managed to get invited to one of their classmates' house parties and at some point in the night had found themselves sat outside in the back garden with a group of people who seemed the complete opposite of drunk and smelled really funky. they'd accidentally slipped into rotation while a blunt was going round, not realising at first that the group was sat in a circle for a reason.

bill was more than happy to give it a go when it was offered, but being the more cautious of the pair, ted was a little nervous. if his dad somehow found out, or smelled it on his clothes later, he was toast. after some encouragement from bill and a few of the others in the circle, he caved.

much to his disappointment, ted didn't actually get high the first time he smoked. he felt more relaxed, but that was about it. he spent the rest of the night slowly sipping on his beer and laughing at/taking care of a very stoned bill. it wasn't exactly an unpleasant experience for him - he didn't cough his lungs up like bill had, it didn't taste terrible like he'd expected it to, and one of the cute girls in rotation had called him a natural which acted like a soothing balm over the simmering pot of nerves still lingering in his stomach.

it wasn't until a few years later that bill and ted became fully fledged pot heads. they'd smoked a little here and there when it was offered, but only managed to get their hands on a dealer's number sometime after graduating high school and moving into their apartment.

ted was designated roller the day they christened their apartment. they'd both attempted rolling before, and while they weren't the best, ted's rolls were infinitely better than bill's; wonky, a little loose and slightly pregnant, but smokeable. needless to say, the two of them got blazed that day and ted actually managed to get high. bill blamed it on his height ("you're just too tall dude!"). they ordered a copious amount of junk food and ended up passed out together on their shitty sofa with a nature documentary on tv.

it wasn't until you came into the picture that both boys actually got good at rolling. ted in particular. not because he wanted to impress you or anything, no way. a cool, sweet, totally bodacious babe who liked all kinds of music, smoked weed and wanted to hang out with him? it was almost too good to be true.

one night with you in particular made ted's head spin.

bill was at work, leaving you and ted alone in the apartment. obviously, ted had already rolled another for the two of you for when bill left - he'd been waiting for a chance to smoke with you alone. it was the perfect chance to make a move.

he'd planned on ordering food, sticking on a movie (maybe a rom-com, girls like that right?), scooting closer to you on the sofa while you smoked and maybe try the whole fake-yawn and stretching an arm behind you maneuver. ted only got as far as scooching closer when you plucked the blunt from his fingers and took a long drag before cupping his cheek, turning his head to look at you so you could part his lips and blow the smoke into his open mouth.

in that moment, ted was pretty sure he fell in love with you.

[generalkenobee]

hello! do you have anymore ted logan headcanons you'd be up for sharing? or possibly evil robot ted? im currently experiencing ted logan brainrot because I recently watched the first 2 films for the first time and I have the PHATTEST crush on ted lol it's embarrassing

AHHHH YESYESYES I DO THANK YOU YESYESYESYES I LITERALLY HAVE SOOOO MANY TED LOGAN IDEAS YOU DONT EVEN KNOW

Warnings: contains both SFW and NSFW

🎸cutie patootie! Ted

- oh my gosh he loves you

- he'll do anything you ask.. anything!

- once in history looked at Bill and said "dude I'm totally a president!" After learning about teddy Roosevelt

-smells you...like a lot

-gives the best hugs ever like actually

-youre the first to get your license in the relationship so you drive him to school every morning while he plays music

-lets you paint his nails and put makeup on him

-always holding hands

-definition of a gentle giant

-his hands are about twice the size of yours

-likes to be the little spoon

-Ted Theodore Logan can not cook.

-please play with his hair

-the first time you complained about your period his dead ass response was "what's that?" 💀

-his dad doesn't really like you but he doesn't really like anyone so it's ok

-him sneaking in your room in the middle of the night while everyone is asleep>>>

NSFW

-sub/ gentle dom

-you'll never forget the noise he said when he first slid in it was like "wait wait wait oh my- I augh.. please no.. it's too much please i-" and it was only half his length-

-sososososoo pussy whipped

-lazy sex

-gently jerky him while he sits on his bed and tells you about his day

-PERV!

-literally taking peaks down your blouse all the time

-lovesss to suck on your boobs while you run your fingers through his hair, holding him close to you

-wont tell anyone what you do together because it's such an intimate moment

-other than Bill...

-bursts into the room while holding your hand pulling you along " BILL BILL BILL GUESS WHAT WE JUST DID!!"

-doesn't realize how horny you get when you see him play

-hes also clueless so..this is how that plays out

"Ted you're so good at guitar.." you said biting your lip looking him up and down "your fingers just move so fast baby" your sweet boyfriend looked up at you from his instrument smiling "thanks babe!" After he said that he quickly looked back down working on his music. You say there looking him in the eye rubbing your thighs together while literally telling him how much you loved his fingers and he just looked away

-hes a massive pervert but he's clueless at the same time yk?

-does not know how to please you the first time so just be patient and tell him what you like

-first time he ate you out was like a dog trying to get peanut butter out of one of those toys..

-I feel like he would excel at fingering you..I mean have you seen the guys hands? And he plays guitar?

-sneaking in just to finger you>>

-lord please moan his name while he's rutting up into you..

IF YOU WANNA HEAR ABOUT MORE OF EVIL! TED LET ME KNOW I KINDA JUST DID CUTIE! TED FOR THISSS🩷

[butterfly-lies-chase-them-away]

Can you do an headcanon about the perfect Holiday gift for each Keanu's character,please?

Perfect Holiday gift for each Keanu Reeves' Characters Headcanon (John Wick, Ted Theodore Logan, John Constantine)

A/N: I hope I did this right, and I hope it's good for each character. I love this man so much 😩🤚

John Wick: John Wick, a man who has experienced so much loss and violence, would appreciate a gift that brings him peace and helps him move on from his past. Given his love for his dogs and his bookbinding hobby, the perfect gift for John Wick would be a beautifully handcrafted leather-bound journal. This journal could be customized with his initials and feature a dog paw print as a symbol of his beloved pets. It would give him a space to reflect on his thoughts and memories, perhaps even use it as a diary to express his feelings and find solace in the written word. Inside the book, you could slip a photo of his beloved late dog, Daisy, as a reminder of his past and the love he still carries with him and a candid picture of him with his new dog. 

Ted Theodore Logan (Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure): Ted is all about the music and has a deep appreciation for classic rock. The perfect holiday gift for Ted could be a vintage, limited-edition electric guitar, perhaps a Fender Stratocaster, in a vibrant and eye-catching color. To make it even more special, it could come with a personalized message like “be excellent to each other and party on dudes!”

John Constantine (Constantine): John Constantine is known for his supernatural and occult interests. The perfect holiday gift for him would be a unique, ancient grimoire or spellbook that he hasn't encountered in his extensive travels. It could contain rare incantations, spells, and secrets from various mystical traditions. To add a personal touch, a silver amulet with protective symbols, ensuring his safety on his dangerous journeys, would be included as well.

[groggy-acorn69]

So here's my first official post for this blog. Just some simple Bill and Ted headcanons to start the blog off right ^^

BILL & TED HEADCANONS

TED 'THEODORE' LOGAN

Audhd

Gets overwhelmed and overstimulated easily which leads him to becoming nonverbal

It pisses his dad off but Ted doesn't let it bother him too much since he knows he'll always have a safe space with Bill

Has lived his life feeling defeated that he'll never find someone to understand him until he met Bill (I headcanon they met around the start of middle school) and now it's his favorite feeling to have Bill understand him when others can't

When he does go nonverbal he never writes down what he wants to say. He always points and grunts until Bill is able to understand him or just wraps himself up in his favorite blanket of Bill's and turns the lights of to decompress until he's able to speak again

He's a heinous nail biter, and while it's not the best solution Bill had always found himself carrying things like erasers and pen caps for Ted to gnaw on instead

It's also his most most used coping mechanism to tell himself 'Bill understands me, Bill understands me' when he gets weird looks or someone fails to understands him

Seeks a lot of tactile stimulation, loving to touch rough and bumpy surfaces or Bill's curls. Also has a habit of rubbing his face over Bill's clothes like a cat when they hug

BILL S. PRESTON

adhd

When he's working on school work or really anything he needs to focus on that doesn't require two hands to do, he grabs a piece of notebook paper and a pen and draws mindless doodles and swirls with his left hand while he works with his right

Mindless scribbles turn into mandela sort of things which morphed into actual drawings

That's how he found his love for art and picks up an extracurricular art class during school

Has a temper but it takes a while for him to lose it, but the fuse shortens when he gets overstimulated

Hates when he blows up on Ted, immediately pulling him in for a hug and apologizing but the guilt still doesn't go away for a while

Keeps multiple fidgets in his pockets and back pack at all times for both himself and Ted when they get restless

Voila! First post done ^^ could've possibly shaped it up a bit more but again- I'm excited to share hehehe. If you like what you see interact and follow for more duders! :)

[brainrot-hq]

Dating Ted "Theodore" Logan Headcanons! (G/N reader)

○ He leaves you for Bill

Inspired by @neilpissyrega

[telekineticseance]

MASTERLIST

🍯 - fluff

✨ - smut

🔅 - angst

KINKTOBER ‘23 LIST

MATT STONE

🍯�� : CIRCUMSTANCES series (matt x f!assistant reader) [COMPLETED]

- circumstances (part one) 🍯

- losing it (part two) 🍯

- working man (part three) 🍯

- entre nous (part four) 🍯

- bravest face (part five) 🍯

- chemistry (part six) ✨

- fly by night (part seven) ✨

- open secrets (part eight) 🍯

- in the mood (part nine) ✨

- closer to the heart (part ten) ✨

- time stands still (bonus christmas part) ✨

✨: tied up (matt x f!reader)

🔆 : kiss the bride (matt x gn!reader)

✨ : first time - kinktober ‘23 (matt x f!reader)

✨ : ten more minutes - kinktober ‘23 (matt x f!reader)

✨ : incapable - kinktober ‘23 (matt x gn!reader)

✨ : not yet - kinktober ‘23 (matt x f!reader)

✨ : smoke signals - kinktober ‘23 (college!matt x gn!reader)

✨ : the rockstar’s gf - kinktober ‘23 (dvda!matt x f!reader)

✨ : reunion - kinktober ‘23 (matt x f!reader)

TREY PARKER

🍯✨ : FASCINATION STREET series (professor!trey x f!student reader) [IN PROGRESS]

- fascination street (part one) 🍯

- strange attraction (part two) 🍯

🍯✨ : DANCER series (90s!trey x f!stripper reader) [IN PROGRESS]

- part one 🍯

- part two 🍯

- part three ✨

🍯✨ : FAMILY FRIEND series (trey x f!reader) [COMPLETED]

- part one 🍯✨

- part two 🍯✨

- part three ✨

✨ : edge of glory (trey x gn!reader)

✨ : carnival rides (trey x f!reader)

✨ : never again (trey x f!reader)

✨ : purple passion - kinktober ‘23 (trey x f!reader)

✨ : demolition lovers - kinktober ‘23 (trey x f!reader)

✨ : call me - kinktober ‘23 (trey x f! reader)

✨ : secrecy - kinktober ‘23 (trey x f!reader)

✨ : late night - kinktober ‘23 (trey x f!reader)

✨ : drive in - kinktober ‘23 (trey x f!reader)

✨ : across the way - kinktober ‘23 (trey x f!reader)

DOUG REMER

✨ : new experience (remer x f!reader)

🍯✨ : headcanons - reader with nippie piercings

✨ : hail to the king (remer x afab!reader)

✨ : noise complaint - kinktober ‘23 (doug x f!reader)

✨ : neighbors - kinktober ’23 (doug remer x f!reader)

✨ : between us - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x f!reader)

✨ : did you miss me - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x f!reader)

✨ : trio - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x f!reader x joe cooper)

✨ : locker room showers - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x f!reader)

✨ : queen’s throne - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x f!reader)

✨ : november - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x f!reader)

✨ : alone - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x gn!reader)

JOE COOPER

✨ : you’re fired (coop x f!reader)

🔅 : masterpiece (coop x nb/gn!reader)

🍯✨ : headcanons - reader with nippie piercings

✨ : trio - kinktober ‘23 (doug remer x f!reader x joe cooper)

✨ : third base - kinktober ‘23 (joe cooper x f!reader)

✨ : poolside - kinktober ‘23 (joe cooper x gn!reader)

✨: asphyxia - kinktober ‘23 (joe cooper x f!reader)

JOE YOUNG

✨ : ineffable - kinktober ‘23 (joe x gn!reader)

DAVE THE LIGHTING GUY

✨ : camera shy - kinktober ‘23 (dave x gn!reader)

✨ : safe word - kinktober ‘23 (dave x f!reader)

TED ‘THEODORE’ LOGAN

✨ : study buddies (ted x afab!reader)

[froggywritesstuff]

character list

the title is self explanatory. this is a list of the characters i'll write for. it'll probably change over time, and if you see a character you'd like but don't see them on the list, just ask cause i might've forgotten about them

Hamilton

Eliza Schuyler

Angelica Schuyler

Peggy Schuyler

Maria Reynolds

Alexander Hamilton

John Laurens

Philip Hamilton

Lafayette

Hercules Mulligan

James Madison

Thomas Jefferson

Aaron Burr

Umbrella Academy

Viktor Hargreeves

Diego Hargreeves

Klaus Hargreeves

Allison Hargreeves

Luther Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves

Ben Hargreeves (Umbrella or Sparrow)

Sloane Hargreeves

Jayme Hargreeves

Stranger Things

Will Byers (non female readers only)

Mike Wheeler

Lucas Sinclair

Dustin Henderson

Eleven Hopper

Max Mayfield

Robin Buckley (non male readers only)

Nancy Wheeler

Jonathan Byers

Steve Harrington

Eddie Munson

21 Chump Street

Justin Laboy

The Goldfinch

Boris Pavlikovsky

Theodore Decker

Marvel

Peter Parker (any actor)

Steve Rogers

Bucky Barnes

Sam Wilson

Makkari

Sersi

Sprite (platonic only)

Steven Grant

Marc Spector

Layla El-Faouly

America Chavez (non male readers only)

Kate Bishop

Yelena Belova (platonic only)

Shuri

Namor

Riri Williams

X-Men

Mystique

Kitty Pryde

Peter Maximoff

Rogue

Logan Howlette

Wade Wilson/Deadpool

Scott Summers

In The Heights (movie version)

Usnavi de la Vega

Vanessa 

Nina Rosario

Benny

Sonny de la Vega 

Heathers

Veronica Sawyer

JD (Jason Dean)

Heather Chandler

Heather McNamara

Heather Duke

John Doe

John Doe

Ride The Cyclone

Noel Gruber (male or nb readers only)

Ocean O'Connel Rosenburg

Mischa Bachinski

Constance Blackwood

Ricky Potts

Hatchetfieldverse

Paul Matthews

Emma Perkins

Ted Spankoffski

Bill Woodard

Ruth Fleming

Pete Spankoffski

Richie Lipschitz

Max Jagerman

Grace Chasity

Lex Foster

Ethan Green

Hannah Foster (platonic only)

Heartstopper

Charlie Spring (non female readers only)

Nick Nelson

Tara Jones (non male readers only)

Darcy Olsson (non male readers readers only)

Elle Argent

Tao Xu (non male readers only(headcanoning him as bi or pan is disrespectful and transphobic))

Tori Spring

Imogen Heaney

Isaac Henderson (platonic only)

Do Revenge

Eleanor Levetan (non male readers only)

Drea Torres

Wednesday

Wednesday Addams

Enid Sinclair

Bianca Barclay

Xavier Thorpe

Ajax Petropolus

Eugene Otinger

(young) Morticia Addams

(young) Gomez Addams

Beetlejuice

Lydia Deetz

Tomorrow When The War Began

Ellie Linton

Lee Takkam

Fiona Maxwell

Homer Yannos

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse/Across the Spider-Verse

Miles Morales

Gwen Stacy

Pavitr Prabhakar

Hobie Brown

Margo Kess

Miles G Morales (earth 42)

Miguel O’Hara

Maze Runner

Thomas

Newt (non female readers only)

The Broken Hearts Gallery

Lucy Gulliver

Nadine (non male readers only)

Nick Danielson

Treasure Planet

Jim Hawkins

Enola Holmes

Enola Holmes

Lord Tewkesbury

Turning Red

Mei Mei

Miriam

Abby

Priya

Raising Dion

Nicole Warren

Tevin Wakefield

Dion Warren (platonic only)

Julie and the Phantoms

Julie Molina

Luke Patterson

Reggie Peters

Alex Mercer (non female readers only)

Flynn

Carrie

Abbott Elementary

Janine Teagues

Jacob Hill (non female readers only)

Gregory Eddie

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake Peralta

Amy Santiago

Rosa Diaz

Love Victor

Victor Salazar (non female readers only)

Benji (non female readers only)

Felix Weston

Pilar Salazar

Lake Meriwether

Lucy

Mia Brooks

Andrew

In Treatment

Eladio

Laila

Spree

Kurt Kunkle

Once Upon a Time

Emma Swan

Regina Mills

Killian Jones

Mary Margaret Blanchard

David Nolan

Henry Mills

Mulan (non male readers only)

Graham

Neal Cassidy

Peter Pan

Jefferson

Dash and Lily

Dash

Lily

Boomer

Juno

Juno MacGuff

Paulie Bleeker

Summer Days Summer Nights

Debbie Espinoza

Frankie Espinoza

Scream (1 through 6)

Sidney Prescott

Billy Loomis

Mickey Altieri

Roman Bridger

Jill Roberts

Charlie Walker

Sam Carpenter

Tara Carpenter

Amber Freeman

Chad Meeks-Martin

Mindy Meeks-Martin

Quinn Bailey

Venom

Eddie Brock

Honest Thief

Ramon Hall

Beth Hall

Wild Child

Poppy Moore

Kate

Drippy

Freddie Kingsley

Monsters and Men

Manny Ortega

Marisol Ortega

Ghostbusters: Afterlife

Trevor Spengler

Phoebe Spengler (platonic only)

Error 143

Micah Yujin

Community

Abed Nadir

Troy Barnes

Annie Edison

Jeff Winger

Britta Perry

The Obession

Logan

Delilah

The New Girl

Lia Setiawan

Stacey Hoffman

Mythic Quest

Poppy Li

Brad Bakshi

Adventure Time

Finn

Princess Bubblegum

Marceline

Marshall Lee

Prince Bubblegum

Flame Princess

School Spirits

Madison

Simon

Charley (non female readers only)

Wally

Rhonda

Dungeons and Dragons: Honour Among Thieves

Simon Aumar

Disventure Camp

Aiden (non fem readers only)

James (non fem readers only)

Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies

Jane Facciano

Olivia Valdovinos

Nancy Nakagawa

Cynthia Zdunowski

Richie Valdovinos

Ted Lasso

Ted Lasso

Roy Kent

Jamie Tartt

Keeley Jones

Sam Obisanya

Transformers: Rise of the Beasts

Noah Diaz

Elena Wallace

Mirage

Helluva Boss

Blitzø

Stolas (non female readers only)

Loona

Millie

Moxxie

Octavia

Verosika Mayday

Fizzarolli

Asmodeus

Hazbin Hotel

Charlie Morningstar

Vaggie (non male readers only)

Angel Dust (non female readers only)

Husk

Alastor (platonic only)

Vox

Lucifer

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (rise + mutant mayhem + tmnt 2007 + tmnt 2012)

Donnie

Mikey

Raph

Leo

April

The After Party

Yasper Lennov

Space Force

Tony Scarapiducci

Renfield

Teddy Lobo

Robert Montague Renfield

Undercovers

Bill Hoyt

Amazing Digital Circus

Jax

Parks and Recreation

Leslie Knope

Ben Wyatt

April Ludgate

Andy Dwyer

Jean-Ralphio Saperstein

Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja

Randy Cunningham (18+ people DNI unless requesting platonic stories)

The Earliest Show

Josh Bath

House of Lies

Clyde Oberholt

Mean Girls (movie + musical + movie musical)

Cady Heron

Regina George

Gretchen Wieners

Karen Smith/Shetty

Janis Ian/Sarkisian/Imi'ike (non male readers only)

Damian Hubbard (non female readers only)

Warm Bodies

R

Peep World

Nathan Meyerwitz

Your Boyfriend

Peter Dunbar

Invincible

Mark Grayson

Shapesmith

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

Sabrina Spellman

Harvey Kinkle

Nick Scratch

Rosalind Walker

Theo Putnam

Prudence Blackwood

Ambrose Spellman

High School Musical: the Musical the Series

Gina Porter

EJ Caswell