#technetronicTactician

[gulescamisade]

Betty Crocker Headquarters:  Arrival

JADESPRITE: -She drifts -- or rather nyooms down toward the lakehouse encampment, green glowy gooing her way through one of the walls and looking around for just about anyone that's in sight.-

DIRK: -HE'S HERE. just sitting around the living area with his leg bouncing restlessly. he glances in jadesprite's direction when she oozes in.-

JADESPRITE: dirk!!

JADESPRITE: everyone

JADESPRITE: we need to go

DIRK: -OH GOOD. AN EXCUSE TO STAND UP. he does that.-

DIRK: What's up?

JADESPRITE: somethings happening at the hq

JADESPRITE: terezis there

JADESPRITE: i think this might be our chance

JOHN: -stands up- 👀

ROSE: -She's fiddling with her needles. The creepy ivory quills she got from deep down on LOMAT. She's going to be using them pretty soon, it seems, might as well be ready.-

ROSE: You mean already?

JADESPRITE: -she nods- we should head there now

JADESPRITE: im sure shes going to need our help

JOHN: -isn't terezi supposed to be dead??? but now is no time for questions he has BEEN ready for action.-

JADESPRITE: where is everyone else? we should get everyone

URSAIS: -SHE'S HERE TOO. Bear rumble.- should i rally th' troops? they're on standby.

ROSE: Some injured, but I suppose most of us are... around the area.

ROSE: Do you have a large bell we could ring to summon them? Communicators would probably tip them off.

JOHN: i have an airhorn.

JOHN: :D

DISCIPLE: -her eyes peek from atop a shelf-

JOHN: -he really wants to use the airhorn.-

DIRK: Use the airhorn.

JOHN: yesssssssss.

JOHN: -....-

JOHN: -dramatic pause-

JOHN: -HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK.-

DISCIPLE: -YOWLS!!!-

DIRK: -🙏-

JOEY: 8D

JOEY: should we come up with a battle cry?

MITUNA: WH47 7H3 FUCK

LATULA: -well shit an airhorn wakes her up-

MEULIN: -YOWLS FROM SOMEWHERE-

LATULA: SH1T DUD3.

LIFERA: -FUCKING POWER LEAPS DOWNSTAIRS- W)(AT'S )(APP-ENING??

JOHN: (ehehehehhehhehehe.)

JOHN: put up your dukes! it's time to fight!

LIFERA: GLUB???

PENNY: -GROGGY AS SHIT. Walks in.- ugh????

ULFURA: -She's currently outside, just feeding and petting this GIANT ASS DRAGONFLY. Her precious...-

HEITOR: -probably fiddling with the electricity or something-

URSAIS: -texts her and everyone.-

ULFURA: !!

URSAIS: -i really need to think of a cool name for this little abnd of rebels but for now you're just URSAIS'S CREW.-

ULFURA: -SHE IS OKAY WITH THAT NAME!!!-

ULFURA: -At this message, she runs to the lakehouse door and all but KICKS it open.-

ULFURA: WE'RE GOIN'???

PENNY: -squints at everyone...-

HESONY: =He's just been looming in a corner this entire time but was currently ourside on self-appointed guard duty. Since they arrived, he has been uncharacteristically quiet. Best not draw any unnecessary attention to himself and all that.=

URSAIS: we'rRe goin'. and we'rRe gon bring the pain. t' wherRe the fightin is thickest. -glances at dirk.-

ERIDAN: -was watching Sunny this whole time from his brooding place in the ice cream truck. Yeah he knows that color and name bruh. He knows it.-

MICEXA: -She's already paying attention to all this... and heading out to tell Sunny what's up. ANOTHER FACE ERIDAN CAN RECOGNIZE, INCIDENTALLY.-

MICEXA: Hey.

ULFURA: YEAAAHHH!!! LET'S DO IT!!! -jumps and PUNCHES THE AIR.-

ULFURA: SHE'S ALL READY TO GO!!!

ERIDAN: -He's reading all about it on the Alternia newsfeeds, don't worry.-

ERIDAN: -taking this time to change back into his combat gear. Good thing he's outside.-

HESONY: Hey. =he replies, his expression softening a fraction.= Are we moving again?

MICEXA: Yeah.

MICEXA: To the HQ.

JOHN: are we gonna go grab jake? my dad? -IF THEY WERE BRIEFED ON A PLAN...john might've just forgotten it.-

HESONY: =stares like she just grew an extra head= What.

JOHN: -forgive him-

JADESPRITE: it seems like terezi is going to try to get them out

JADESPRITE: but of course if they need help we will help them

JADESPRITE: right?

ROSE: Death really doesn't take the way it used to, does it?

JADESPRITE: no, it doesnt

JADESPRITE: theres definitely something different about her, though

JOHN: lucky for us! -laughs nervously-

JADESPRITE: ... -glances around like maybe she shouldn't have said that-

JADESPRITE: either way, we need to get moving

JADESPRITE: -floats toward the wall-

DIRK: -just grunts about that and tries to raise his voice over everyone's excitement- Ok, I need some of you to stay here and watch the injured. The rest of you follow Jadesprite.

DIRK: ... Like, through the door.

MICEXA: Yeah.

MICEXA: ... This is it.

REDGLARE: -STARTING TO STAND TO LEAVE ANYWAYS-

JOHN: -just starts shuffling towards the door even though he's a doctor....-

JADESPRITE: -schlorps through the wall on that note!-

PENNY: .... so whos stayin?

JOHN: -NOTHING TO SEE HERE.-

DIRK: -points at rose's white board of THE INJURED.- If you're on this list, you're not going.

DIRK: That means you, Redglare.

HESONY: =he laughs, shaking his head= We're going towards the people who want to kill us...

HESONY: =he patted her shoulder and squeezed it.= Okay. We don't stop.

REDGLARE: -STOPS AND STARES DAGGERS AT THE WHITEBOARD-

ROSE: -...one dagger-

MICEXA: -she reaches up to cover his hand with hers, her grip a little tighter.-

MICEXA: You don't leave my side.

REDGLARE: >;|

DAELOS: -Also not too happy about this arrangement because he's on that list.-

REDGLARE: -SITS LOUDLY-

PENNY: what about Riley?? shes sure as fuck not going.

DIRK: Of course she's not.

DIRK: -LOOKS AROUND SUSPICIOUSLY... is she trying to sneak away...-

HESONY: Wouldn't dream of it.

PENNY: -SHE BETTER NOT BE-

DEREK: -walks in- Dont worry I locked her in the bathroom.

HESONY: =also dropping eaves on the people behind them=

PENNY: ... -sNORTS-

PENNY: good deal.

ROXANNE: Good call. -At Derek, yes shes totally been here.-

PENNY: I uh.

PENNY: (God damn it.)

PENNY: I can stay and watch her.

PENNY: and the rest of you folks. nobody get any crazy ideas.

JOHN: -where's kankri? john wants to make sure he stays behind with his tiny knife and otherwise complete lack of being able to defend himself, but also one more hug would't be bad...-

PENNY: -LOOKS ESPECIALLY AT REDGLARE-

KANKRI: -Hes certainly staying behind to take care of people, he knows he and his little knife would be useless on this type of mission.-

MICEXA: .... -sighs a tightly held breath before glancing at the dragonfly.- \|/e should start boarding up.

REDGLARE: 3xcus3 m3?

REDGLARE: Who 1s th1s wom4n. D1d w3 just... coll3ct h3r.

REDGLARE: -GLARES AT PENNY WOW-

JOHN: -SQUEEZES HIM FOR STRENGTH.-

PENNY: ;)

PENNY: from the dump specifically.

KANKRI: -John so help him dont you be reckless.-

PENNY: hi. Im your new nanny.

JOHN: -He's going to be as nonreckless as you can be while you smash people with a hammer and use magic wind powers.-

KANKRI: -J o hn.-

HESONY: =he nodded giving her shoulder one more squeeze. No more promises of living through this. That only ever brought back luck.=

REDGLARE: >;I

URSAIS: -MOUNTS THIS DRAGON FLY like it's no big deal.-

MICEXA: -Well, she's going to do her best to make sure it's true, even if unspoken. She heads for the dragonfly.-

MINDFANG: -Also she is ready to brawl, she even did some maintenance on her arm even without your help Hesony. Now it probably wont fall off while she fights.-

ULFURA: ALRIGHT COME ON GET YOUR FANNIES ON BOARD!!! -gestures aggressively at the many rows of carrying seats on this dragonfly's butt.-

RUFIOH: -Waiting outside for people to gather... he's anxious as he shuffles his wings but. Didn't come here to sit on his ass. As much as he would like to. Shit's scary...-

ROXANNE: -Climbing on board with no time to waste, shes got important people to save.-

HESONY: =yeah, but i bet that piston still sticks, Wolfchow=

JOHN: -While he's huging people, Dirk and Rose also get a squeeze b4 they board. Wait? Is that Rufioh? Also hugged? Meulin? Hugged.- be safe you guys!!!  

LATULA: -HUP. She's climbing on-- she got used to the dragonfly a while ago, slinging out her rifle as she takes a seat.-

LATULA: 41ght!!!!

JOHN: -he's very liberal with these warm hugs.-

MEULIN: -HEY SHE IS HERE, peering out from around the lakehouse.- AH--

MEULIN: EVERYONE'S GOING?

MEULIN: -snugs JOHN!!-

MICEXA: -climbs RIGHT ON BOARD. It's possible she's ridden something similar before at some point as well... but either way, she's not hesitating to get a move on.-

URSAIS: -sitted near the front.-

JOHN: -after he's done spreading his love around, he hover into one of the farthest seats cuz tha back of the rollercoaster is always the most fun.-(

LIFERA: -She runs out and climbs on board, too, also toward the back. She figures they're going to need people watching the butt.-

JOHN: B)

HESONY: =clambers on=

SOLLUX: -And he, meanwhile, finally drags himself out of the lakehouse. His appearances have been infrequent, but he's here now, quiet as he navigates awkwardly toward the dragonfly and then floats himself into a seat.-

SOLLUX: -MAY HAVE SAT ON SOMEONE??? We just don't know.-

URSAIS: o//o -SUDDENLY HAS SOLLUX IN HER LAP. jk. or not???-

SOLLUX: -hello-

SOLLUX: -is this what seats are supposed to feel like???????-

URSAIS: -....clears her throat. casually picks him up and places him into the seat next to her instead.-

SOLLUX: .... 0h.

URSAIS: safety first 'n all.

SOLLUX: ...

ROSE + DISCIPLE ALSO: -OH IF EVERYONES CLIMBING ON THEN THEY ALL GET ON THERE-

SOLLUX: -slowly rests face in hands.-

SOLLUX: -there's no other choice. he's going to have to die today.-

DIRK: -you son of a fuck-

HESONY: =pondering how this crew has survived for so long=

SOLLUX: -LOOK BITCH-

DIRK: -no fuck you-

DIRK: -ANYWAY HES ALSO HERE. AND THE REST OF THE ONES OF MINE GOING.-

JOHN: -WAVES AT THE REST OF THE GROUP!!!-

JOHN: -the ones staying behind, i mean.-

[[ WHAT AN EXPEDIENT PROCESS. Once everyone going is on, Ulfura eyeballs the whole troupe. ]]

KARKAT: =is here=

ERIDAN: -Hi everyone. This fish is here. Most people probably don't know who he is??? He's just a guy sitting here with a big gun in his lap, half his face wrapped up in scarf.-

ERIDAN: - >> -

KARKAT: =SOME DOUCHE=

ERIDAN: -Yeah, true.-

ULFURA: -climbs the dragonfly and gets on the upper part of its back, grabbing reins and settling in up there.-

ULFURA: WE READY??? GIMME THE WORD!!!

ROSE: As ready as I can possibly find myself, yes.

JOHN: heck yes!!!

JOHN: let's try our best everyone. -anime voice on purpose-

JOHN: -the only way to respond to this horrifying situation is to be INCESSANTLY CHEERFUL.-

SOLLUX: (i swear t0 g0d egbert.)

JOHN: (ehehehhe. get fucked.)

RUFIOH: }:o

RUFIOH: -gonna be flying with the gang off to the side... Gives the dragonfly a pat though. Wishing it the best of luck and a safe flight.-

URSAIS: go ahea' and kick off, pupper.

URSAIS: we got a lot a shit to do an little time t' do it in.

ARANEA: -does rufioh mind if she joins him? her wings are getting strength back but she figures she needs them for the battle... so she's giving them a stretch!-

[[ The dragonfly flickers its wings in buggy acknowledgement. It feels so FRESH and reassured now. ]]

RUFIOH: -He does not mind at all. Side eyes Aranea.-

DAELOS: -stares through the window in the rain at her. he wants to slay their enemies alongside her again. :(-

ARANEA: -reaches dramatically for daelos with her heart...-

ULFURA: YEAH!!!

ULFURA: LET'S DO THIS!!! COME ON FLAP FLAPS!!! -tugs the reins gently and nudges the dragonfly with her communing powers-

ARANEA: ::::) -at rufioh-

DAELOS: -just be as ruthless as possible for him-

ARANEA: -SHE WILL-

ULFURA: HOLD ONTO YOUR BUTTS!!!

[[ The dragonfly suddenly lurches, kicking off from the ground, and its wings start flapping wildly to take them up into the sky. Takeoff and landing is the hardest part. ]]

RUFIOH: -pchooooooooooo time to fly!-

URSAIS: -This part always makes her a little queasy. She doesn't like being off the ground. ʕ灬￫ᴥ￩灬ʔ-

ERIDAN: -scrunches up his face at the wind buffeting his hair. He thinks he smells rain on the horizon...-

JOHN: -basically uneffected-

[[ They rise into the sky quickly, if not weaving side to side a few times between the wind and the dragonfly adjusting to its new weight. It soars above the treetops, higher into chillier air. The pressure and wind aren't super comfortable, but Ulfura keeps it from going too high. They're on the way, headed straight for Golden Valley. ]]

ROSE: -Twirling those needles in her hands, thinking. Working off nerves. This... really is happening. The flying doesn't bother her-- it's everything else. It's the fact that she can't even fathom seeing something useful with her powers, or the fact that she can hardly conjure a spark. She just focuses on breathing. Deep breaths. Think. Don't get impaled by a fork.-

ROXANNE: -Is probably sitting next to Rose, because its unlikely she would let anyone else take the seat next to her daughter right now.-

ROXANNE: -And she also glances at her with a touch of concern, but unfortunately most of her expression is just determined sternness for what is to come.-

JOHN: -YELLING to be heard above the wing flaps and buffeting air.- SO! I DON'T THINK. I KNOW THE NAMES OF LIKE ...75 PERCENT OF YOU. YOU WANNA LIKE...TELL ME THEM? -he has his own ways of working out his nervousness.-

HEITOR: NO

JOHN: WELL I MEAN. OKAY. THAT'S VALID. IF YOU WANNA BE A DICK ABOUT IT. ANYBODY ELSE?

ERIDAN: -No. Giving John the cold shoulder. Don't look at him, motherfucker...-

JOHN: -He has his eyeballs on you Eridan. All over you.-

MICEXA: ... -does she even want to yell above this wind...-

HESONY: .... =well he sure isn't going to be an ass! He glanced up to see a flying human. Okay. He will accept this.= ....Hesony. =He says, in his regular voice.=

MICEXA: -side eyes Sunny like pls-

JOHN: -HE IS FLYING WITH EVERYONE ELSE CURRENTLY. ON THE BIG BUG.- HEY...SUNNY? SUNNY? OKAY. NICE TO MEET YOU! I AM JOHN.

HESONY: =EXCUSE only FRIENDS call him that. Whatever=

HESONY: Greetings, John.

MICEXA: -gosh.... she loves this grumpy doofus-

MICEXA: MICEXA NESHEN. PURSUANT SEAKRAIT.

JOHN: COOL. EXCELLENT. THANKS FOR HELPING. -

MINDFANG: -John do not thank them for anything.-

MICEXA: -just sort of softly grunts at that.-

JOHN: - He doesn't know these are the peeps that fucked up his friends otherwise he might be less friendly. -

HESONY: =Anything for Terezi's friends, no matter how ungrateful they are.=

HESONY: No problem. =he says instead=

ERIDAN: -gazing at these legislacerators. Saying nothing. Sipping tea with just the look in his eyes.-

[[ Below them, they'll being to see signs of smoke and fire, and the vague sounds of explosions and weaponry through the buffetting wind. In patches where they can see, it looks like there are scattered Alternian troops fighting little scads of rebels. The further they go, the more fire there is. Looks like quite a few things blew up down there. ]]

MICEXA: -why's this bitch got an in flight beverage...-

LATULA: -SHARP INTAKE-

LATULA: sh1t dud3 th4t lookz pr3tty n4sty.

URSAIS: - EL SQUINTO-

LATULA: no off3ns3 but 4r3 your p33poz gonn4 b3 4bl3 to hold out?

JOHN: - promptly shuts up at this point. he's totally stoked and not sick/scared-

[[ The dragonfly sways here and there to try to avoid the plumes of smoke. It's likely Ulfura is guiding it around them; bugs tend to react badly to signs of fire. ]]

URSAIS: - bracing herself- worRy bout yerRselves.. we'rRe used t' this. shit.

URSAIS: an' stay brRave.

SOLLUX: -he doesn't seem to react much there next to Ursais... just tilted his face out toward the outside of the seat, almost like he would be looking down at the ground if he could see.-

[[ They fly over lakes and green landscape -- it would be beautiful in just about any other circumstance, but today, the serenity of the landscape only seems to be feel cold and empty for the reality of what's happening below. ]]

JOHN: -equips Zillyhoo. It makes him feel better, even if it does put chanting voices in the back of his head.-

JOHN: -zi-hi-hi-hilly hoo~-

URSAIS: -ʕง•ᴥ•ʔง-

HESONY: =Same, Sparky Jr. Cept he has eyes. You dont. Neener neener neener.=

SOLLUX: -LET HIM BROOD IN PEACE, TEREZI'S OLD FRIEND GUY. JEEZ.-

ARADIA: -by sollux cuz you don't get to brood alone-

DIRK: -ha, that gives him an opportunity to brood alone too. YOU CAN'T STOP HIM HE'S IN CHARGE.-

SOLLUX: -oh so now YOU'RE in ursais' lap???-

SOLLUX: -CUT IT OUT GOD-

DIRK: -he might as well straight up be doin the thinker pose he's so contemplative right now-

ARADIA: -where am I...I am everywhere...-

SOLLUX: -just hoping she's flying alongside him tbh-

SOLLUX: -just out there smiling and being a creep-

[[ As they fly along, they'll finally start to see it breaching the line of the trees. The headquarters turned into something almost fortresslike, and empty expanse instead of trees -- water surrounds the building on all sides, centering it in a huge lake. Sticking out of the water nearby is a giant silhouette-style statue, but instead of the businessman it used to be, it's in the shape of )(er Imperious Condescension. ]]

[[ The building has been rebranded, of course. Instead of the original spoon, there's a bright red trident. ]]

ROSE: -eyes that silouette. plz...-

JOHN: :/

DIRK: -squints at all this. that's where they're being held... they're so close he thinks his heart is about to jump right out of his chest. he's never not anxious, of course, but the possibility of him or anyone dying here has never felt more real.-

QIRIN: How charming. ^_^

DAVENFORTH: Qirin please

QIRIN: =SHE'S KIDDING=

ARADIA: 😊

JOHN: okay if we win or finish early can we all mutually agree that needs to be heavily vandalized or blown the fuck up.

LIFERA: -just staring at this statue. It's ridiculous, but also... it's so huge. It looks like the way the Condesce feels -- larger than life, the figure that's loomed over her since she hatched. And now...-

DAVENFORTH: -Puts a hand on Lifera's thigh-

LIFERA: -She sort of jumps -- but only just barely, and looks over at Davenforth. She doesn't smile this time, but she acknowledges him.-

ERIDAN: -He more or less feels the same as Lifera about seeing these real actual headquarters. But with knowing NO ONE, he refuses to voice it. He fixes his eyes on the building, determined. Hopeless.-

QIRIN: =You stop that=

DAVENFORTH: -Squeezes gently. It's all cake baybe, we got this.-

QIRIN: =Get your pessimism out of the optimist club=

MICEXA: -yeah they're probs gonna die-

QIRIN: =what the fuck did i just say?=

ROXANNE: -Why do all you new people always assume we're going to die.-

MICEXA: -LOOK MAN-

HESONY: =because it HAPPENS that's why=

ROXANNE: -Nuh uh. No one is dying this time either, nope.-

HESONY: =thats what he said last time then terezi bit it=

[[ From closer they can also begin to see ships on the lake -- most of which appear to be Alternian in nature, but also some that aren't. There's a lot of pirate-style fighting going on down there. Boy howdy. ]]

MINDFANG: -Nice.-

JOHN: -HE JUST WANTS TO GET OFF THIS DRAGON FLY AND START FIGHTING. It's like ripping off a band aid.-

JOHN: -Hhhhhh-

QIRIN: =Patience, my padawan=

ULFURA: I'M BRINGIN' US IN CAP!!!

ULFURA: -she's starting to weave this dragonfly even more now, to avoid any lines of fire they may ultimately end up in. They're beginning to do a slow circle around the headquarters building.-

URSAIS: ya did grReat now, pupperR.

ULFURA: -SHIMMERS... but quietly.OF COURSE SHE DID GREAT.-

[[ The dragonfly SWOOPS, knocking at the mainsail of one of the Alternian ships on its way around with some of its legs. It rattles everybody a little. ]]

DIRK: -(mccree voice) whoa there- =swears under his breath=

[[ The dragonfly finally swoops down to the platform entrance of the building -- it's almost a tight fit for such a big fucking bug with wide wings, but it manages. ]]  

[[ It lands with an even bigger rattle. ]]

[[http://stmedia.startribune.com/images/10011821%201gmills100114.JPG]]

[primadonnatartuffe]

DEREK: -IT'S CRIMBUS. CRIMBUS EVE. they're still getting settled back into their house on skaia, so there's unpacked boxes everywhere... and knowing the strider fam, they will likely stay like that for a good long while.- 

DEREK: -but the important thing is that they have the CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS set up. he's jamming to some mariah while tossing some presents under the tree last second. PERFECTO.- 

DEREK: -dirk and dave are supposed to stop by for tonight, but they've got their own plans otherwise. it's just a little immediate family thing. should be nice and laid back. OR NOT. who knows. but he's pumped.- 

RYAN: -she's in the kitchen, standing in front of the open fridge eyeballing the egg nog inside.-

RILEY: -unpacking--who even does that? it was no surprise derek put the Christmas decorations up first, because that's just what kind of a guy he is. the place still doesn't feel like their own yet, but she imagines with time it will. she also puts some last minute stuff under the tree as she enters the room- damn...killer acoustics with this place being nearly empty. it's like she's alive and actually here. 

DAVE: -he takes it upon himself to walk in with presents under his arm. no knocking or anything. he too puts his by the tree and goes straight for the kitchen. and there's Ryan- you feeling overheated

DEREK: Psh I wish she was. 

RYAN: -looks at dave- i mean yeah... thats what happens when you move from winter horrorland to a place with a normal temperature for this time of year.

DIRK: -HE'S HERE BEHIND DAVE and does the same as the rest of them, except he's dumping a disproportional amount of gifts under the tree. turns to thumbs up at his parents.-

RILEY: hey, baby. -waves at the oldest boy- jeez you sure you didn't want to use a forklift for all those? 

DAVE: if you ever stepped foot into houston youd just immediately disappear

RYAN: rip me... -closes the fridge and just punches dave lightly in the gut because she can.- 

DIRK: I could use the exercise. -now he's going in for a hug. C'MERE MOTHER.- 

DEREK: Nah... You look just fine. -observes, because they have the same body type whoops.-

DAVE: what happened to the conksuck spirit ryan 

RILEY: -hugs dirk tightly- that don't mean shit coming from you since you're built literally exactly the same. but in my professional opinion, dirk, you look great.

RYAN: i thought you were supposed to fight on decemberween??? 

DEREK: -SHRUG EMOJI- 

DIRK: I'm going to pretend that I'm agreeing with you. So thank you. -squeezes her and then moves on to derek. but instead of hugging it's an elaborate handshake.-

DAVE: thats another holiday in december 

DAVE: that you missed 

DAVE: too slow 

RILEY: -watches this performance worthy handshake- amazing. gets me every time.

RYAN: more like i gotta MAKE UP for my belated decemberween gifts!!! -punches dave more- 

DEREK: -this goes on for two solid minutes. it's outrageous.- 

DIRK: -FINISHES THE SHAKE WITH JAZZ HANDS.- So, how's moving in going? 

DIRK: I see you've already unpacked the essentials.

DAVE: -messes up her hair- uh oh uh oh 

RILEY: the decorations are the essentials in this house. not like. i don't know. beds. or soap.

RYAN: -tommy wiseau voice- dont touch me motherfucker... 

DIRK: Yeah, obviously. 

DEREK: This kid gets it.

DAVE: i cant stop uh oh uh oh -pushes her hair in her face- 

RILEY: i'll take dirk's place, then. and dirk can stay here and enjoy the decorations.

DIRK: ... No, that's okay. I like my giant house. 

RYAN: ppbbtbtbtbtbtbtbtt. RYAN: MOMMM. DAAAAD. DAVES BEING A LIL BITCH.

RILEY: meaning the decorations are not the essentials. bingo bango-- -hears Ryan yelling and snorts- THEN BE A BIGGER BITCH.

RYAN: -looks at dave- oh shit. 

RYAN: its going down. -steals his shades and puts them on, then shoves him and flees to the living room-

DAVE: -flashsteps to the living room- 

RILEY: there we go. beautifully executed.

RYAN: -THROWS SELF ON THE COUCH- stay back. 

DIRK: -flashsteps behind dave and gets his arms up under his to lock him into place.- Goodnight bitch.

DAVE: good fucking morning bitch -struggles- 

RILEY: it really feels like christmas now.

DEREK: -snickers and goes to lounge in an arm chair. the Dad Arm chair.- 

DIRK: Power struggle. Power struggle. 

RYAN: destroy him!!!!!!!!!

RILEY: i got front row seats to what you two would have been like as teenagers. -she sits crosslegged on the couch, entertained- 

DAVE: happy to be the underdog ryan thanks 

DAVE: -he's still trying to get out of this. his brother was always THAT MUCH stronger than him. close but so far-

RYAN: -wiggles to drape partially in riley's lap- 

DIRK: To be honest we ain't never gonna grow up. -releases dave because this is just SAD-

RILEY -gently pets Ryan's hair- 

DAVE: i dont know what youre talkin about 

DAVE: im the sole mature member of this family

DIRK: You're just sayin' that cuz you ain't as fun as the rest of us. -ruffles his hair. incredibly mature. and then he takes a seat next to the tree.- 

DIRK: Are we doing the gift thing?

RILEY: well fuck yeah we're doing the gift thing. -still petting ryan's head- 

RILEY: you wanna be santa? 

DAVE: -also plops down on the floor-

DIRK: I always wanna be Santa. 

RYAN: pick one for meeeee. im the youngest so i get all the prezzies first. -grabby hands from where she's lying.- 

DIRK: Alright, fine. -HANDS HER A GIFT. who knows who it's from.-

RYAN: -TAKES IT and starts to open.-

RILEY: -it's from riley. it's a box that holds two VIP backstage passes to sia. nobody knows if they are really keeping sia alive this long or if she's just a convincing hologram. who knows at this point?-

RYAN: (scream emoji)

RYAN: holy shit!!! THANK YOU MOMMY. -squeezes her- 

DIRK: -peeps...- I hope you're taking me. 

RYAN: yeah you wish.

RILEY: -hugs her tightly- now you can go somewhere and i'll kind of know where you are. ;) 

RILEY: i was thinking maybe you could take jack along.

RYAN: -quiets for a second but she smiles- yeah totally. 

RYAN: im definitely gonna make him go anyway.

RILEY: that's my girl.

DIRK: -hands riley a gift now- This is from me.

RILEY: yeah? -she smiles because she can't help it and takes the gift, carefully unwrapping it-

DIRK: -it's a soft fuzzy robe that says ONE BAD MOTHER on the back in glittery letters. there are matching slippers too. one says mo and the other says fo.-

RILEY: -she squeals upon opening it and feeling how soft it is- oh my god, i love it! -she's already putting it on- this is fucking great.

RYAN: -pets her arm- soft. 

DIRK: -smiles- Glad you like. 

DIRK: Looks good on you. -picks up the next gift... FOR DEREK? might as well cover all the bases while they're here. he passes that one along.- 

DEREK: -snatches it up- Lets see what we got here...

RILEY: isn't it? -she's still grinning- 

DAVE: -this one's from dave. when he opens it, it's going to be a beautiful katana. this is top tier, best of the best. but the fact that dave's 100% ok with giving his dad a katana at this point... that probably says more than any card can-

DEREK: ... -dammit dave, we all came here to have a good time. he can't help smiling a little bit...- Damn. This is some good shit. 

DEREK: Puttin it right over the mantle. 

 DEREK: Too pretty to use. -plus he's like TOTALLY ancient now so...-

DAVE: i know i made sure it was good shit 

DAVE: top shelf encased museum envied shit

[colostrumtractatus-blog]

-- colostrumTractatus [CT] began trolling technetronicTactician [TT] --

CT: Hello Dirk Strider. I suppose it's about time I began speaking with you.

CT: As you may know, my name is Horuss Zahhak and I recently took the initiative to recruit myself into your crew. You will find that it is an e%cellently beneficial decision in the long gallop of things.

CT: Earth is fast approaching. I hope you are prepared to ride bareback into perils unknown. I know I certainly am.

TT: Riding bareback into perils unknown is basically a summation of my whole lifestyle.

TT: So yeah, I'd say I'm ready.

CT: It is an admirable quality to possess. A steadfast mindset of which will guide your equally steadfast hand across the proverbial flank of your crew.

CT: I plan to assist you with this endeavor to the best of my abilities.

TT: Cool. Just don't get in the way when I'm windin' my hand back to slap everyone's literal flanks into gear when the time comes. I'd like to reserve that privilege.

CT: You will find that when it comes to pred*cting the efficiency of potential plans, I am simply the best there is in the business.

CT: I do not presume Miss Lalonde informed you about my situation. Or perclops you would like to hear the tail from the horse's mouth, rather?

CT: It may be e%pedient information as it bears a lot to do with my future endeavors. And therefore, yours.

TT: Yeah. Basically all I know is that you're a ghost inhabiting the body of a robot.

TT: Which funnily enough, this isn't the first time I've been involved in something like that.

TT: Still, I'd like to know the whole story, especially if you're here with an agenda that effects all of us.

CT: It's possible my agenda will affect everyone on some scale. Should certain implications come to realization.

CT: But it's very true that I am dead. A ghost, trotting straight from the vacuum of nothing that my soul was doomed to wander. In fact, it may be relevant to mention that I was among the legions of trolls who were living on Beforus at the time of its destruction.

CT: It's also my udderstanding that I am the only troll ghost of my kind, with the capacity to draw myself out of the contained limbo that the afterlife has become. You may thank Miss Pei%es for that.

CT: But as far as e%istances go, it's herdly the worst of fates. Some souls may wish to pursue endeavors in the mysteerious Beyond. Others might wish to have time to process their deaths and remain in the safety of the dream bubbles, ect ect. None of this metaphysical mambo jumbo has anything to do with me.

CT: I managed to pull myself out of my own dream bubble and drifted. Drawn by my affinity to the Void and the realization that I *was* Nothing. A pure, perfect vessel of Nothing... and therefore, I could be everything there ever was.

CT: It was there my journey began. And how I came to find Miss Pei%es. It was she who inspired me to press and search myself of limitations. To udderstand the phenomenon I was e%periencing and unveil my own potential. And so. Knowing that this must be the purpose I could serve, I began to make discoveries in the void.

CT: I uncovered memories, information, places... people who have been forgotten. A race of omnikinetic e%traterrestials on Avalon, for e%ample. In e%change with a promise that I would find the means to restore their now e%tinct race, they assisted me in contacting the physical world. Reaching Miss Pei%es friends, the crew members on the UU.

CT: And so I find myself here. Helping you, as I resolved to do. And by e%tension of my commitment, helping Miss Pei%es whom I have an incredible debt with.

CT: But that is not where I intend on leaving things off. Knowing that these resources are available to me, I would very much like to clone a flesh and blood body for myself. And from there, continue my work as the bridge between this world and the vacuum.

CT: This way, lost cultures like my be100ved Beforus may live again.

TT: Sounds like you've had quite an enriched afterlife. I'll see what we can do to hook you up Frankenstein style.

TT: I don't suppose you have any info to share with me relating to Earth?

CT: The device I installed will be the key to masking your approach.

CT: I, alongside the other Void affiliates, will cast a veil around the ship. Once placed, it will be a trivial matter maintaining it and will stand for as long as you desire.

CT: What is it that you are attempting to achieve with this mission?

TT: Primarily to extract a few people and a piece of tech they're currently hiding away from the Empress.

TT: And based on what you're telling me, we should be able to pop in and out without much fuss.

CT: That is the plan.

CT: Before then, I would like to hear how likely it is a body will be cloned for me. I have some ideas of how to proceed, I only need a sample of the perfect specimen.

CT: Hoofbeast genes are.... tragically. Unavailable in space.

CT: But a b100b100d, I suppose. Troll and male. I will not be possessing a body that is anything less than physically, genetically perfect in stature.

CT: That is why I will be providing an ectobiological signature akin to my old self. It is the closest we can get to such standards, after all.

TT: I guess I can ask your fellow blue bloods if they're willing to donate their genetics to a good cause. Probably gonna be an awkward conversation but trust me, there is no one better equipped for awkward conversations than myself.

TT: Additionally, I look forward to the day when we can transplant a troll or human spirit into the body of a horse.

CT: I am one hoof in the right direction. Rest assured.

TT: Science is amazing.

TT: By the way,

TT: You uh...

TT: Said you met Feferi out there?

CT: Several times. Yes.

CT: I udderstand she also spoke with... Fefetasprite. I believe she is called. And Equius.

CT: Why do you ask?

TT: Guess I'm just wondering how she's... doing? Is that a strange thing to ask? I dunno.

CT: She is dead as the other inhabitants of the Void.

CT: I'm not certain what else you would like to know.

TT: I'm not sure either.

TT: Forget about it.

CT: If you wish.

TT: I just realized I'm having a conversation over text with a literal horse.

TT: I love everything about this. Just thought you should know.

CT: I appreciate your acknowledgement. Perclops it was fate which allowed us to trot in convergence.

CT: One that would not be defined by the constraints of death and oblivion.

CT: I just think that's as neat a fact as it is comforting.

TT: It's beautiful, frankly.

TT: Anyway, I've got this checklist of errands I guess I'm running for you all filled out and I'll get on that ASAP.

TT: But for now, business hours are done with. I gotta recharge my batteries before someone busts down my door and chastises me.

CT: On the contrary. I find that there is a certain health to subjecting yourself to the will of others. To allow events to play out in a manner beyond your control.

CT: If that means, yes.

CT: Accepting a scolding as one rapstallion of a mare do well.

CT: Enjoy your evening, Mr. Strider.

TT: ... I will enjoy my evening. Thanks man.

TT: Later.

-- technetronicTactician [TT] gave up trolling colostrumTractatus [CT] --

[taciteaneremite]

-- estrapadingTrueblue [ET] opened up a memo board: FamShenans. -- -- 

estrapadingTrueblue [ET] began responding -- 

ET: Hey fam. Droppin in here to let you know whats goin on. 

ET: And whats goin on is... 

ET: Me taking off with Rammie at the Skaianet base on Odimist. Zuserks coming with us too. Its like... 

ET: Actually Im thinkin about heading out there myself to give the place a look around right now. If it works out thats where Im gonna be living from now on. 

ET: Yall can check it out if you like. Its kind of cool. Evergreen forestry. Nobody around except for miners and idk. Lumberjacks or something. 

ET: So yeah. Ships retiring. Its time to spread the wings. Lemme know what yall think.

TT: Oh.

TT: That sounds 

TT: Really great.

ET: Its that time pa.

TT: I know. 

TT: You and Colt both. 

TT: It's good, though. It really is.

TE: I'm not gonna leave right away or nothin'...

ET: Nope I am. 

ET: Its happenin.��

ET: Im making it happen.

TE: I could maybe look around Odimist with you if you want, though... I kinda like the sound of it.

GT: Thats a fantab idea coltsworth! Go with your brother i say.

GT: But you know youll always have a place to stay with us. :) 

GT: Your home away from home! Skaia is as much yours as it is ours you see? And by jove its your right to know you belong!

ET: Thanks dad.

TE: Yeah... Thanks dad.

BZ: ummmm. 

BZ: what'z happening?

ET: Im fuckin off forever is whats happenin.

BZ: o... ok.

BZ: bye bitch lol.

BZ: jk.

BZ: 8(

ET: You probably wouldnt like it there bro. Theres snow and shit that are bad for bugs and flowerin plants.

BZ: i wazn't planning on FOLLOWING YOU. BZ: it'z juzt zad to zee you go!! lmao all theze people leaving. 

BZ: 🎉

XE: 🎉 in-deed.

ET: At least your lemons are safe. 

ET: For now.

BZ: yeah. finally.

GT: I say all of this is good. Frig! 

GT: It could mean im to spend new years at the family vacation home. 

GT: DIRK WHAT DO YOU SAY.

ET: Wow...

TT: That sounds nice, actually.

TT: Bye kids.

ET: That didnt last long at all.

BZ: let him rezt...

BZ: if we're on zkaia by then tho i'm hijacking the houze to throw a wild party jzyk.

GT: You know the rules of house parties buddy. Only if squarewave and sawtooth are chaperoning.

BZ: um well it wouldn't be a party without them anyway??

GT: Thats better!

BZ: >8P 

BZ: eheheheh.

[ardentcupid-blog]

-- technetronicTactician [TT] began trolling ardentCupid [AC] at 21:34 -- TT: Hey Meulin. AC: ヾ(=ﾟ･ﾟ=)ﾉ < DORK!! TT: I shouldn't even be surprised anymore when I'm greeted that way. TT: What's up? AC: (^･o･^)ﾉ < AGR33D. AC: (^●ㅅ●^) < I'M JUST HANGING OUT IN MY BLOCK. TT: That's cool. Me too. TT: Chillin' with all my lil dudes. AC: (=ＴωＴ=) < 333333!!!! AC: (=；ェ；=) < THE LITTLEST DUDES OF ALL... AC: ヽ(^..^=ゞ) < WHAT ELSE ARE YOU DOING? TT: Overthinking, I guess. TT: Gotta work out a game plan for our next destination. And in addition to that, sprite versions of everyone I know keep popping up and making us all question our own identities. TT: It's a thing. AC: (=^..^) < OH... THAT'S PRETTY WEIRD. AC: (=^･ｪ･^=) < ARE YOU FURRIED ABOUT IT? TT: A little. TT: I'm worried about how it's affecting Dave. TT: And now I'm wondering how it's affecting Jake. AC: (^･o･^) < WHAT? WHY? AC: (=ｘェｘ=) < IS DAVESPURRITE BEING BAD? TT: Nah. Well, not that I know of. TT: But I don't think he can get up to that much trouble floating around in space. TT: Another sprite showed up today. I guess we could call her Jadesprite. TT: She didn't know where she was and it was freaking her out. I guess she was worried about us, too. TT: Anyway, she kept getting upset... Dave kinda exacerbated matters. TT: And it was making Jake anxious. Which isn't a huge surprise, but the whole "alternate selves" topic is a little sensitive for him. AC: (^・x・^) < OHHH. AC: (^..^)ﾉ < IS HE GOING TO BE OKAY? TT: I think so. TT: I'll wrestle him when he comes home. That usually fixes things. AC: (=ↀωↀ=)ᕗ < I KNOW THAT F33L. AC: ~(=ΦェΦ) < WHERE IS HE NOW? TT: It would appear that he's in the gym. AC: (◐ ω ◑ ) < DID YOU JUST TOTALLY SPY ON HIM? AC: (ฅ•ᆺ•ฅ) < WITH CAMERAS AND JUNK? TT: I mean. TT: A little. AC: (●ↀωↀ●) < CAAAAN YOU PUT CAMERAS IN MY GLASSES? AC: (=⊙ω⊙) < I WOULD REALLY LOVE THAT. JUST SAYING. TT: I know you would, Meulin. TT: I'll see what I can do. AC: ＼(=^..^)// < Y33333SSS. AC: (^./.^)ﾉ < SO WHAT ABOUT DAVE? IS HE OKAY? TT: He isn't right now. But I think he will be. AC: (=^..^=) < OHH... AC: (=^..^) < MAYBE I SHOULD S33 HIM SOON. TT: That'd be cool. TT: I think he could use some distractions. AC: (^･ω･^) (^･ω･^)ﾉ⌐■-■ (^⌐■ω■^) AC: (^⌐■ω■^) < YOU GOT IT, DUDE. TT: Hell yes. TT: (^⌐■ω■^)人(▼ー▼メ) AC: (๑ↀᆺↀ๑)✧ < UM??? I AM SAVING THAT IN MY EMOJI BANK, THANK YOU. TT: No problem. TT: Aw. TT: Jake just messaged me out of the blue to tell me he loves me. TT: What a fucking nerd. AC: O=(‘ω'Q) < BEAT HIM UP. AC: (ノω<。) < THAT'S WHAT HE GETS FUR BEING SO CUTE. TT: Agreed. AC: (^●ㅅ●^)ﾉ < HOW MANY W33DS HAS DAVE SMOKED IN HIS LIFE? TT: Like... two whole weed. AC: (^◔ᆺ◔^) < WOW, WHAT A FUREAKING NERD. TT: Tell me about it. TT: As far as I know, he's only ever smoked with me. AC: ლ(=ↀωↀ=) < I KNOW WHAT I MEOWST DO. TT: Go forth. AC: ε=ε=ε=ヾ(э^・ｪ・^)э TT: I should run, too. Gotta put Colt and Joel to bed before I prep myself for a good old fashioned wrestling match. AC: ฅ(≚ᄌ≚) < KICK HIS BUTT REAL GOOD. TT: I will. You can count on that. AC: (´⊙ω⊙) < THE TENDER MEATS WILL RISE AGAIN. AC: (=^･ω･^=)丿 < BY33333! TT: Later. TT: ヾ(*▼・▼)ﾉ⌒☆ -- technetronicTactician [TT] gave up trolling ardentCupid [AC] at 23:21 --

[ebironiccrest-blog]

-- technetronicTactician [TT] began trolling ebironicCrest [EC] --

TT: Hey. Where'd you fly off to?

EC: sup

EC: took off doing what sprites do best and caught/ am catching some uvs

EC: besides that thought you could use a scout

EC: aint expecting to just roll on into earths solar system like its saturday night fever

EC: despite the circus like shitfest thats bound to be happening out there right now

EC: im talking elephants on parade look out

EC: bippity fucking boppity

EC: lets not downplay that aspect because in historical retrospect its going to be as hiliarious as it is depressing as shit

TT: I mean, yeah.

TT: But I'm glad you're scoping it out.

TT: Not that I'm planning on diving into that endeavor headfirst. But I can use all the intel I can get.

TT: I've been apprehensive about the whole thing.

EC: youd have to be an idiot with his head wedged clean up his ass to not be

TT: I have been known to be both of those things at times.

TT: There's a reasonable amount of recoil to exhibit at face value, but I'm talkin'... is this the right tactical move? Should I even be risking this?

TT: I feel like we'd be better off doing Jolene's Skaianet plan first. It's a safer bet, at least. But with the shit going down on Earth... This may also be more urgent.

TT: It's the Condesce's turf technically, and potentially surf at this point, so I don't anticipate it blowing up anytime soon.

TT: But... Fuck. I dunno.

TT: I'd just feel better if I had more information, I guess.

EC: you get up in that one guys business

EC: the one who messaged you before or

TT: I've definitely pressed his paranoid ass for as much dirt as possible. Which is a lot, granted.

TT: But he can't tell me what we're looking at in terms of entering the planet from space. Is there a blockade? Are there Alternians patrolling the atmosphere? We all agree there's obviously something, but without details we're basically boned.

TT: And should I be making this call for only one guy and the claims he's making? I know I got people that can vouch for him, but that doesn't make the risk any less questionable.

EC: alright lets sit our metaphorical and in your case literal ass down and chill the fuck out for a second

EC: youre asking the right questions but forgetting the answers you already got on hand

EC: think about what resources you have at your disposal man

EC: captains gotta have inventory on that shit

TT: Right.

TT: Guess it's about time for another meeting.

EC: you got this

EC: for one you got a ethereal half bird half awesome bro made of sunshine fucking delight on your side

EC: i got... the know on some shit

EC: general shit

TT: Yeah. That is advantageous. And why I'm venting to you about my indecision currently.

EC: then as your standing guide of reference

EC: im gonna tell you that you and the crew are more capable of skirting through this shit than you might think so

EC: when science fails theres motherfucking magic here to take into consideration

EC: which is like

EC: pretty cool when you think about it

TT: Despite accepting the magic as a thing, it hasn't quite registered as a viable resource.

TT: But it is cool.

EC: but its there dude

EC: just nobody knows how to do it

TT: Maybe that's why I keep conveniently forgetting about it...

EC: seems like a good time to make lemonade out of the lemons handed out bro

EC: i say 100% unironically lol

TT: Guess you're right.

EC: aint fun when your personal trials and tribulations are put out on display for everyone to check out

EC: your weaknesses

EC: but thats how that shit works

EC: everything you believe in everything that makes up like you as a person

EC: ends up being challenged

TT: That's some corny shit. But that's some real shit.

TT: So that's some real corny shit.

TT: Making mistakes in my position is literally life or death. I know I gotta stick to my guns, but it's... Challenging, to say the least.

TT: The affirmation is good.

TT: Thanks.

EC: trust me when i say the corny shit is what sticks with you when everything else is like

EC: obsolete or something

TT: Ain't that the truth.

TT: In fact, corny shit made me the gross family man that I am today.

EC: yeah no joke

EC: three dudes three kids and a whole lot of namby pampy shenanigans

EC: what could go wrong

TT: Too much. But it never seems to.

TT: I know it's a rhetorical question in jest, but I wanted to use it as an opportunity to be corny one last time here.

EC: hey man youre the one married to the teeter totter of checks and balances between the two universes

EC: the good and the bad

EC: you can be corny all you like

TT: That's

TT: Hmm.

EC: fun lil factoid

EC: and by fun i mean shit probably wouldnt be the same if the dude wasnt here

EC: maybe thats true thinking back on it

EC: i have no fucking clue

EC: all i know is what i was shown and its what we have to work with

EC: so considering the conditions we count our lucky fucking stars what could be debated as the secret ingredient that makes this clusterfuck reality at all possible

EC: for better or worse amirite

TT: For as much as you just said, you sure told me jack shit.

EC: about what specifically

EC: magic being real?

EC: because thats a thing

TT: I?

TT: I don't actually know.

TT: That's not true.

TT: How Jake relates to whatever it is you're trying to say.

EC: im saying all this progress kick started because he figured out who he was

EC: and found his way in

EC: i mean

EC: you ever think what it was like before he happened

TT: Of course. I thought I had made the connection before, but I guess I drew that line just short of the actual point.

EC: in conclusion and i reiterate over and over again

EC: magic is real af

TT: Yes. Ok. That's been made abundantly clear.

TT: I guess we can all thank Jake for paving the way for us.

TT: I can jive with that.

EC: word

EC: hey

TT: Yes?

EC: you talk to jade lately

TT: I haven't had a proper conversation with her in a while... But I've been keeping an eye on her.

EC: shes pregnant again

EC: you ever hear a person talk about their impending pregnancies with like

EC: them talking about it like a fact

TT: She's...

TT: It's an understatement to say she's having a hard time right now.

TT: But we're taking care of her.

EC: hey its 75 degrees in the atrium right now the hydrangeas are coming in also im pregnant too i guess

EC: yeah

EC: yeah

EC: ok no allow me to flip my shit a little on her behalf

EC: i need to talk to her she needs to know what shes up against

EC: fuck

EC: i gotta go

TT: Wait, what's that supposed to mean?

EC: it means shit could get dangerous

EC: i dont know how i dont know when

EC: but jades worst enemy has always been herself

EC: you dont just drop his bomb on someone with like

EC: tact

EC: or

EC: something

EC: literally anything better than me

EC: but yall dont know what shes capable of

EC: and i need to tell her the fucking truth so she knows

TT: Jesus.

TT: Ok??

EC: ok

TT: Are you sure there's nothing I can do?

EC: its gotta be her

TT: Right.

TT: ... Alright.

TT: Then I guess I'll let you go.

EC: cool

EC: ill keep you updated

TT: Thanks.

EC: im out

-- ebironicCrest [EC] gave up trolling technetronicTactician [TT] --

[effluentbalatron-blog]

[02:38] -- effluentBalatron [EB] began pestering technetronicTactician [TT] at 02:38 --

[02:38] EB: hey man.

[02:41] TT: Hello again.

[02:41] TT: Sup?

[02:41] EB: nothing much. just seeing what's up with you!

[02:42] EB: i'm still recovering from that glorious pie.

[02:42] TT: That was some damn good pie.

[02:42] EB: as baked goods go, pie is by far the most benevolent.

[02:44] TT: This is true.

[02:45] TT: Man, I might go sneak some more for the fam.

[02:45] EB: suuure. for the fam.

[02:46] TT: Listen...

[02:46] TT: I got hungry mouths to feed.

[02:47] EB: oh come on, you don't have to feed citrin and jake. they locate the food and then tell you to put it in their mouths.

[02:47] EB: sollux? maybe. i still don't know him that well.

[02:47] EB: gotta fix that if you ask me.

[02:48] TT: Please. Even if it means dropping in unexpectedly.

[02:48] TT: Don't be discouraged if he hisses in greeting.

[02:48] TT: That's normal.

[02:49] EB: yeah by the way thanks for moving across the ship!

[02:50] EB: that's going to make visiting a lot easier when i'm having trouble walking.

[02:50] EB: asshole.

[02:50] EB: hehehhehe.

[02:50] TT: What can I say? I like to challenge people.

[02:50] EB: you're challenged.

[02:50] EB: i thought power wouldn't change you. you're giving up on the ballpit?

[02:51] TT: You have to make sacrifices sometimes.

[02:51] EB: it's still lame as heck.

[02:52] TT: I know. I am gonna miss it.

[02:52] TT: But I kinda need that space.

[02:52] EB: well, there are three of you.

[02:52] EB: plus more.

[02:52] TT: Yep.

[02:52] TT: Plus more.

[02:52] EB: i guess if you're going there's no reason to stay either.

[02:52] EB: i might move too.

[02:54] TT: Really?

[02:55] EB: yeah, like.

[02:55] EB: well.

[02:55] EB: feferi's room. she has fish you know. and they have to be fed still. and ruleus is comfortable there. so maybe i'll move in across from her.

[02:55] EB: and keep it nice until she comes back.

[02:57] TT: Right...

[02:57] TT: Yeah.

[02:57] TT: Good idea.

[02:57] TT: And hey, Ruleus is always welcome to stay with us. He loves hangin' out with Citrin.

[02:58] EB: i bet they're gonna be bffs. heheh.

[02:58] EB: bffs who screech and bite eachother sometimes, but bffs nontheless.

[03:02] TT: Is there any other way to express affection between friends?

[03:02] TT: Not that I'm aware of.

[03:03] EB: are you hinting that you desire screeches and bites from me?

[03:03] EB: i wouldn't speak to soon, these front ones are pretty lethal.

[03:12] TT: I'm pretty sure I know the dangers of rabbit teeth.

[03:13] EB: well, fair enough.

[03:13] EB: but i do a better bugs bunny impression.

[03:20] TT: You do.

[03:20] TT: Man, I miss you already. You sure you don't wanna live in our closet or something?

[03:20] EB: lol i knew you couldn't get enough of me.

[03:20] EB: i don't think i'd fit what with all your clothes though.

[03:21] EB: don't worry dude, i'll still come visit.

[03:21] TT: True.

[03:21] EB: or make you come visit until getting around isn't such a pain in the ass.

[03:21] TT: That makes much more sense.

[03:21] EB: did you notice i was sans wheelchair today?

[03:22] TT: I did. Is that workin' out alright?

[03:22] EB: well usually i would just use my wind powers to scoot around and be super lazy, but i'm trying to get used to actually putting weight on my legs again.

[03:22] EB: it was really tiring and uncomfortable. but i just need practice.

[03:23] EB: i don't think i'm coming back to work for a little while though.

[03:23] EB: is that okay?

[03:25] TT: Yeah, man. It's all good.

[03:25] TT: Take all the time you need.

[03:25] EB: i have been having a little trouble focusing to be honest.

[03:25] EB: even on like tv shows and stuff.

[03:28] TT: I get that.

[03:28] TT: I find company usually helps distract from uh... distractions. So I'll be sure to get up in your business plenty. If you'll have me.

[03:28] EB: haha, yeah of course i will.

[03:29] EB: but i don't really mean i'm distracted.

[03:29] EB: i just have a hard time concentrating. things are like, foggy

[03:29] TT: Hmm. I see.

[03:30] EB: if it wasn't for that i'd probably go back to work right now. i'm really bored!

[03:32] TT: Unacceptable.

[03:32] EB: it's downright inconvenient!

[03:37] TT: If I wasn't engorging myself on pie right now I would dazzle the boredom out of you with my flashy ass.

[03:37] TT: Ugh Rose was right. I'm getting soft.

[03:38] EB: your ass?

[03:38] EB: i mean it will if you keep eating pie like that. haha.

[03:39] TT: Yes.

[03:39] TT: My ass.

[03:39] TT: But also in general.

[03:39] EB: i think by the time i met you, you were already a softie.

[03:39] TT: No way.

[03:39] EB: and now you've been ground into dust and fluff.

[03:39] EB: all the way.

[03:42] TT: Yeah. After a certain point, I never really stood a chance.

[03:43] EB: so dirk. now you're married to two dudes. you're a dad. you're captain of your very own ship of high profile criminals....

[03:43] EB: what's next on the agenda?

[03:52] TT: Well, I guess the only thing left for me to work towards now is...

[03:52] TT: A horse ranch.

[03:52] EB: you know, i'm not kidding. i would actually like that.

[03:52] EB: horses are neat.

[03:53] TT: That's the understatement of the century.

[03:53] EB: don't you mean centaury?

[03:53] EB: hehehehe.

[03:53] TT: Fuck.

[03:53] EB: lol!

[03:56] TT: Actually, there is something.

[03:57] TT: We've been... discussing the possibility of having more kids.

[04:01] EB: well shit. :O

[04:01] EB: do tell!

[04:05] TT: I guess I don't have many more details to share about it just yet.

[04:05] TT: Aside from it being a thing.

[04:05] TT: ... But I did wanna bring it up. Kinda been sitting on it waiting for an excuse.

[04:06] EB: well hey, i don't blame you.

[04:06] EB: it's exciting news!

[04:06] EB: we need more news like that if you ask me.

[04:06] EB: plus, i love babies. :)

[04:07] EB: were you thinking of adopting some of the kids from europa?

[04:12] TT: Maybe. They're all kind of older. In a rough spot, too. Dunno if I'd be able to provide what they'd need.

[04:12] TT: I know Jake is really taken to that little human boy. But I haven't seen him since we got back.

[04:12] EB: oh, i hope someone else is caring for him.

[04:13] EB: did you guys have other ideas?

[04:18] TT: There's always good old fashioned test tube babies, I guess.

[04:18] EB: oh! duh!

[04:18] EB: i forgot that was an option.

[04:18] EB: amazingly.

[04:18] EB: since i am one.

[04:19] EB: and look how good that turned out.

[04:21] TT: Yeah. You're almost passable for a normal human being. That's pretty damn good.

[04:22] EB: i'm the closest thing you're gonna find on this damn ship.

[04:22] EB: i hope i get better soon enough to help you with your test tube babies!

[04:23] EB: i never get to use the biology side of my skillset.

[04:24] TT: That'd be cool.

[04:24] TT: Makin' babies with my good bro here.

[04:26] EB: you were just waiting for an excuse to say that. haha.

[04:27] TT: Yeah I was.

[04:36] EB: so would it be like a mix of you and jake or a mix of sollux and you, or a mix of jake and sollux?

[04:37] EB: you probably haven't decided yet i know but you GOTTA be thinking about it and imagining it.

[04:46] TT: Well...

[04:46] TT: I don't think Sollux is all that interested in the idea of creating his own genetic offspring. Obviously he's been on board with other classically human traditions thus far, and he's cool with the idea of another kid in general.

[04:46] TT: Besides, I'd like to do some research on hybrid kids before I consider that an option. I know it's a thing. Guess I'm just paranoid about the health of a cross-bred lil dude.

[04:46] TT: So, that kind of limits our options. Which is fine.

[04:47] EB: hmmm. a fair point!

[04:47] EB: if i can get myself to focus i'll start looking into things for you. of course our good friend tavros would also be really interested!

[04:48] EB: anyways, i should get some sleep.

[04:48] EB: come visit me soon, alright?

[04:48] TT: I will. Don't you worry.

[04:49] EB: okay buddy. seeya!

[04:49] TT: Catch you later, John.

[04:49] -- effluentBalatron [EB] ceased pestering technetronicTactician [TT] at 04:49 --

[xenogeneicersatz]

SIMULA: -peeps into the homestead, making sure everyone has their clothes on and isn't wrestling or something before they enter.-

DRUSIE: -SHE ISN'T WRESTLING ANYONE. In fact, she's organizing the book shelf.- c8

JAKE: -is here, directing the block cleaning. Or at least, straightening things up around the grown up work stations. Perks up at the first sign of a distraction.- Simmy the kid! There you are!

DRUSIE: -she perks, too, stepping down from her... well, it would be a step stool for her, but it's really more of a ladder.- oh hi!

JOEL: -sitting on the floor, polishing up this bedazzled belt. The only reason he stuck around to do this is because J dad made him.- BI

SIMULA: Hell-o. -shuffles in- There are more of you here than II anticipated.

JAKE: And you know what they say the more the merrier! -SMOOCHES THE OFFSPRING ON THE HEAD- Drusie goosey was helping clean up the place. Isnt that right??

DRUSIE: yep! 

DRUSIE: yuu've missed out on so much fun cleaning time while yuu were gone CB

DRUSIE: - CCCCCB -

SIMULA: How terrible for me. -nose wrinkle at the smooches... not in front of JOEL...-

JOEL: -He can't say anything. He was smothered in smooches too.-

DRUSIE: -DON'T ACT LIKE WE'RE NOT ALL NERDS JEEZ YOU GUYS.-  the wurst

DRUSIE: what can they help with pawpaw?

SIMULA: -squints a little at drusie. they didn't come here to go CHORES...-

DRUSIE: -chores came here nonetheless.-

JAKE: Gee whizz. Lets see... 

JAKE: But theres not much to do here is there?? Youve taken care of the finer details it looks like! -It's not like Jake is the BEST person to ask about tidiness. You should see his work station.-

DRUSIE: -skitters to a cabinet and climbs on top of it just to reach another shelf where she can grab a cloth.- dusting!

SIMULA: Eugh...

JAKE: Bahahaha sorry honey bunches! -He is the adult.-

SIMULA: -floats the cloth out of her hand and then starts wiggling it at shelves unenthusiastically. they're like a goddamn disney princess.-

SIMULA: - B| -

DRUSIE: -incredible....- 

DRUSIE: -looks at Joel like r u seeing this-

JOEL: -They're obvious never going to find a good honest spouse this way. He is still cleaning this belt.- 

JAKE: -has gotten distracted from cleaning by sorting through the work station drawers. Whistling a happy tune.- So what brings you over sim? Did you ever find a project to work on? How are the friends??

SIMULA: Actually, II'm help-ing Ramm-ie with her lat-est pro-ject. 

DIRK: -EMERGES FROM THE BEDROOM. oh shit, children are here.-

DRUSIE: -AT LEAST THREE OF THEM, YES. where are the other ten??? they could use dust rags too.-

SOLLUX: -emerges with Dirk. there's nothing weird about this.-

JAKE: -digging thru drawers.- Rammie! Now thats one sharp tack. Whats the project over? 

JOEL: -excalibur faces behind shades about parents. Gay.-

DIRK: -they were NAPPING together, obviously.- What projects? 

SIMULA: She is mak-ing anti-gravitational shoes. -wiggles rag around drusie just to annoy her.-

SOLLUX: 0h shit. 

SOLLUX: i just call that sh0es. -snrk!!! he's a psionic see it's FUNNY. when did he sink into these kinds of dad jokes????-

DRUSIE: -you stop that. HANDS ON HIPS.-

SIMULA: -NEVER. wiggle wiggle.- Well, you know me. Be-ing the generous soul that II am, of course II am help-ing her a-chieve a skill sec-ond hand to me. 

 DIRK: -takes a seat on the couch, but leeeeans over to watch joel. he hover.-

SOLLUX: -joins. babe you're hovering again.-

DRUSIE: -FLAPS HANDS BACK AT- suuure

JOEL: -Dirk gets to get an eyeful of this bedazzled belt shit.- Too bad Rammie is already top tier The Shit. As opposed to you who is just A Shit. Lmao.

JAKE: -over here- Watch your language young man! -There is a Drudru here.-

DIRK: And be nice. -LEANS MORE. YOU CAN'T STOP HIM.- Like this sweet belt buckle.

DRUSIE: -that's right. WATCH YOUR FUCKING LANGUAGE.-

SIMULA: -rolls eyes. not that they can tell.WHATEVER. they're bored of dusting drusie, so they're just going to leave this rag on a shelf and go sit on the other side of sollux.-

JOEL: -The whole belt is bedazzled, Dirk Dad. The whole belt.- Im perfectly nice. 

JAKE: -suddenly laughs because he found an ancient green smuppet in the desk. Oh he remembers this.-

DIRK: I know, Joel. -looks over at jake and the smuppet.- Wow. Where did you find that? 

SIMULA: -casually snuggles up to sollux dad. nobody look.-

JAKE: In the desk where else!!!! -he's gotta show this to derek asap-

DIRK: Well, it should be up on the shelf.

JAKE: Simula! Do the honors! -tosses that smuppet their way-

SIMULA: Eh? -hit in the face with a smuppet because they weren't paying attention-

JOEL: -singing- The story of my life. I take her home. I drive all night to keep her warm and time.... The story of my life.

SOLLUX: -snugs the baby. kisses their head. smells them get hit by smuppet ass. all in a day's work.-

DRUSIE: -THAT THING THO???? also snrks at the soft memes-

DRUSIE: put it with the other trophies c8

SIMULA: -grumbles and revenge launches the STUPID SMUPPET in that direction... but it lands nicely on the shelf.- There.

JAKE: -sparkles, hands on his hips as he admires the smuppet. Gosh he loves that thing.-

SIMULA: You're wel-come. -snuggles more, and even more grumpily.- 

DIRK: -leans back to wrap an arm around these two- Hey... It's almost a full house. Where's the rest?

JOEL: Citrins on a date. 

JOEL: Colts still recoverin from having sung in front of millions of people at the Open Mike Night.

DIRK: Oh, yeah... We probably won't see him for another couple weeks. -shades glint tho- 

DIRK: Citrin's on a date?

JOEL: With Ruleus. Theyre bein obnoxious. 

JOEL: Aka its all over the dash.

DIRK: -HE'S LOOKING RIGHT NOW. whips out his comm device.- Aww. Jake, come here and look at this. 

SIMULA: -turns on the tv. they want nothing to do with this... they'd much rather play video games.-

JAKE: -WADDLES OVER.- Awww shucks! Would look at that? Make sure you comment dirk! That really is a good picture!

DIRK: Ok. -types up a comment, probably telling him to have a good time. BE SAFE.- SIMULA: -time for attack symmetra to lure fools into her fuck house.-

SOLLUX: -snrk. dirk pls....- als0 be sure t0 tell them h0w ad0rable they are, and h0w pr0ud they've made y0u. and if he br0ught his g0gurt. when y0u're getting grandkids. the usual stuff. 

DRUSIE: -you can't ignore her girth. she's climbing into Simula's lap. She's helping.-

DIRK: I'm way ahead of you. -just casually spamming up ruleus' photo nbd.- 

SIMULA: -wiggles into a more accomodating sitting position.- Ah-- Pro-tect my teleporter, dammit. -much salt-

DRUSIE: -soft chirrs.- chase them down with laser chainsaw DRUSIE: make them regret their choices

SOLLUX: 0h and if he's wearing clean underwear.

SIMULA: -they are definitely getting play of the game for the murderous rampage they just went on- 愚かな。 

DIRK: You should leave him messages too. Let's make it a family affair.

JAKE: -distracted by the possibility that Simula is cursing in japanese and then torn back to pay attention to Dirk.- ??? 

JAKE: Well he has to know he has my support right?? Im sure hes fine and dandy!

SOLLUX: -leaves a message that says "d0n't play in traffic."-

[taskforcetumut]

ATRIUM SECURITY RECORDING 0426

ROSE: -After a few nights of... strangeness, some things are kind of starting to seep in.  For one, her dreams have become something completely different from what they were, in ways she has a difficult time explaining.- 

ROSE: -For another, she's found herself prone to doing unusual things she has no real explanation for.  Looking in closets she's never bothered with before, rearranging things in storage.- 

ROSE: -She had been leaning into it, early on.  But the thought is far more chilling when she realizes how little time she's spent focusing on anything else.- 

ROSE: -She takes a deep breath, trying to center herself.  focus.  Don't get caught up in these intrusive thoughts.  Intrusive... behaviors.  Just focus.  Exist.  Live right here and right now and in this very location.- 

ROSE: -Baldur is busy toddling under a small tent she set up in the atrium, since he likes it better when there's shade.  She is sitting at a table with a mostly-empty tray, tapping a fork against a plate as she stares at what little is left of her meal.-

RILEY: -she's in the cafeteria, sitting at a table and scooting food around on her plate with a fork but not eating any of it. in fact, you could say she's frowning at it. this has been going on for a while-

ROSE: -She glances over at Riley.  Admittedly, she id not in a very different place, mentally, herself. - 

ROSE: It does not look like you're enjoying that meal very much.

RILEY: -looks over at rose when she speaks up- yeah. i've been feeling sick the past couple of days so i figured i should try eating something. -she shrugs- 

RILEY: but when your stomach is fucked up, nothing sounds good.

ROSE: I recommend hot chicken broth.

ROSE: Sounds unpleasant, regardless.

RILEY: sounds terrible.

JADE: -she's sneaking up on the little tent and having a look at it. it's kind of adorable. also peering around it at Rose and Riley.- :)

RILEY: -spots jade and waves- hey, jade.

JADE: hi!

JADE: is this a little hidey spot here?

RILEY: -looks from the table- kinda looks like it.

ROSE: It's doing a fairly poor job of hideying us, it seems. 

ROSE: Considering how swiftly we've been uncovered. 

ROSE: And there's no reason to insult soup in my presence, Riley.

ROSE: I did nothing to deserve that.

JADE: -gasps- soup???

JADE: where? :p

JADE: im going to argue in its favor anyway

JADE: soup is always... souper

RILEY: nothing against you. soup should just try to taste good specifically when you don't feel like eating. it's gotta make an effort of some kind. instead of just being useless. 

RILEY: no offense.

JOHN: i like the kind with the little star noodles in it, personally. -gUESS WHO'S IN YOUR CONVERSATION NOW. he trot up.-

JADE: alphabet soup!

ROSE: And do you suppose the little noodles have some medicinal properties?

JADE: -she tail wag- they sure do 

JADE: tell them john

RILEY: -oh god that sounds disgusting.- hey john. 

RILEY: can we please talk about something other than food. -in a cafeteria-

JOHN: oh- sure. -scratches under beard.-....uh actually maybe not.  now that you said that all the subjects that come to mind have exclusively to do with food.

JADE: how about puppies?

JADE: thats what i always think about when i dont feel good

RILEY: yeah, that's kind of too much to ask. -she sighs- 

RILEY: ugh, i just wanna fucking eat something. 

RILEY: oh, yeah. let's talk about puppies.

JADE: just think about snuggly puppies squeaking and being soft and cuddly

JADE: wagging their little bitty tails

JOHN: ...damn. -has to sit down for this.-

ROSE: ...Jade. 

ROSE:  Never change.  For the sake of the universe itself.

JOHN: -solemn nod.-

RILEY: -thinks about them and she can picture the fluffiest cutest puppies and how snugly they must be and she doesn't even realize her eyes are watering-

JADE: :)

JADE: -plops down to sit across from Riley when she notices the... tearing up?-

JADE: uh

JADE: (are you okay?)

ROSE: -Slides a little closer, too.  That is.  Conspicuous.-

RILEY: -wipes her eyes because she can't hide it- yeah, just. 

RILEY: thinking about. 

RILEY: puppies. -covers her mouth because her lips start to quiver WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING-

ROSE: ... 

ROSE: You said you've been feeling sick? 

ROSE: ... 

ROSE: And have you been feeling... 

ROSE: Particularly... 

ROSE: Emotional like this?

JADE: ...

RILEY: i'm not emotional just...just think about. like for a second think about. 

RILEY: when they're so little and their heads shake because they can't hold them up right. 

RILEY: and they just are so amazed by everything around them and it's like they have this great perspective on life. like they just find the good in everything and want to spend time with other puppies and humans. -THATS NOT HELPING- 

RILEY: now y'all are gonna cry too because i made you think about that and here i was being considerate.

ROSE: I admit, that's a compelling case you just made.

ROSE: For breaking against the torrent of human emotion. 

ROSE: But I'll try to be strong, here.

JADE: -that is pretty fucking adorable....-

DIRK: -wanders in. hello everybody.- 

DIRK: ... -looks at jade and rose like WHY IS MY MOTHER CRYING-

ROSE: Hello, Dirk.

ROSE: Do you ever take the time to think about when little puppies meet their new siblings?

ROSE: ...Just a thought, here.  Crazy.  No idea why it's sprung to mind.

DIRK: Uh...

DIRK: I can't say that I have ever considered such an oddly specific scenario.

RILEY: you can get me a dog right? a baby one? since you're the captain? 

RILEY: maybe two so one's not alone?

DIRK: ... Will you stop crying if I do? -WHATS HAPPENING-

RILEY: ...maybe...

DIRK: I'll get right on it. 

DIRK: Um. Are you... ok?

RILEY: really? -she looks so grateful- you mean it? you're not just saying that? -wipes her face- i'm fine you just missed me explaining why the puppies are so cute. you would be crying too. you and your dad.

DIRK: I would like to see that, actually. 

DIRK: -she's crying... over puppies... he's very confused.-

ROSE: (:

RILEY: and your brother. everybody.

RILEY: i'm taking one for the team, here. you're fucking welcome.

DIRK: -rose's smiling is creeping him out. he feels like he's missing something here.-

ROSE: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

DIRK: -what the FUCK-

DIRK: -cautiously sits with these ladies...-

RILEY: -wipes her face again- jesus. i'm serious if you don't get me a dog i-- -chokes a little-

DIRK: You're... really serious about getting a dog...?

JADE: -ok now she's kind of muffling laughter behind her hand. HELP???-

JOHN: -people are crying??? he spaced out. he was eating.-

RILEY: why not? people are serious about dogs all the time. -gestures at jade- she's cute as hell and she loves dogs.

JADE: -looks at rose like YOU KNOW WHATS GOING ON HERE TOO DONT YOU.-

JOHN: -distressed-

JADE: i do love dogs!

JADE: its true!

ROSE: That is entirely adequate cause for mutiny.

ROSE: -( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) at jade-

DIRK: -he is completely clueless and remain that way until it's spelled out for him.- 

DIRK: I know, it just... seems a little spontaneous? But I guess I wouldn't actually know.

JADE: -gives dirk a look-

DIRK: -WHAT-

JADE: :)

JADE: :p

JADE: :)

JOHN: -he's so confused too.-

DIRK: -why she blep-

JOHN: -chewing-

RILEY: yeah, you don't know how much i love puppies. but now you do.

JADE: -chinhands-

DIRK: ... 

DIRK: -is he being punked somehow?? what is going on?? please don't do this to him.- 

DIRK: Am I... missing something?

JADE: i think so

JADE: or maybe were all missing something?

ROSE: So, Riley!

ROSE: You've been spending a lot of time with anyone, lately?

DIRK: ???????

RILEY: no. 

RILEY: -glances at rose and squints- what is that supposed to mean?

JADE: i think shes saying that maybe your

JADE: ... stuff going on

JADE: has a reason?

ROSE: Indeed. 

ROSE: You know.  Sudden hormonal differences... 

ROSE: A few weeks of nausea...

JOHN: -eyes widen. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.-

DIRK: -HE STILL DOESN'T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE HE'S COMPLETELY IGNORANT TO THIS OF ALL THINGS-

JOHN: -looks at Rose like SERIOUSLY.-

DIRK: You've been sick?

RILEY: -squints more- who the fuck said a few weeks? -looks at Dirk- just for the past couple of days. on and off. not a big deal.

DIRK: Oh... Ok.

JOHN: well....hey riley maybe you better schedule an appointment with me. just to be safe? -GRINNING AWKWARDLY.-

ROSE: And start acquiring some tiny outfits.

DIRK: ...

DIRK: -OH-

JOHN: -for the puppies! lol lol lol.-

RILEY: ... 

RILEY: -looks between them- y'all are being rude.

DIRK: -screams internally-

RILEY: like. do you do this to anybody else? i don't think so.

JOHN: S-sorry. -looks away. embarassed.-

ROSE: I can think of one other occasion I've done this exact thing.

DIRK: Ok!! Let's stop. 

DIRK: Talking about this. 

DIRK: Forever.

RILEY: -feels bad about John- you're the doctor here. if you wanna see me, fine. prescribe me some nausea and head pills.  whatever. i'm sick of being sick, anyway.

JOHN: we'll talk about it later!JOHN: -time to pay very close attention to his food. he feels bad too for being unprofessional.-

DIRK: -staring at riley, though. now he can't get the thought out of his head...- 

DIRK: Um. 

DIRK: I'm gonna grab some food. Do you want anything else? Or a drink maybe?

RILEY: ugh. no. i don't ever want to eat again. 

 RILEY: -still feels incredibly guilty about John. she will definitely stop by-

DIRK: That's not-- Oh, you're being facetious. Obviously. Ok-- Here I go. -stands up and scurries away-

RILEY: -sighs and looks back at rose and jade- sorry.

JADE: hehe its ok!

JADE: sorry about the teasing

JADE: that is definitely just rose

JADE: (shes a nerd)

RILEY: -smiles a little- it's cool. 

 RILEY: i would offer you guys my food but  it's probably cold.

JADE: i dont really mind that!

JADE: -peeks at it to see what's meatless-

RILEY: -everything. potatoes. crackers. Applesauce-

[robynsaint]

RILEY: -she is sleeping because she probably slept through any alarms she set to prepare for breakfast with dirk. Oops-

DIRK: -well, dirk is as punctual as always, despite feeling mentally and physically sluggish as of late. knock knock. he's here.-

RILEY: -it takes her a moment to stir awake, but when she's conscious enough to realize who it is, she nearly leaps out of bed to open the door. she looks a downright mess- hey. sorry. come in.

DIRK: -relatable. there's a part of him that feels like he should be bothered by this, which is that same part that is still feeling annoyed about everything that happened with her and his dad, but he's much too tired himself to give much creedence to those thoughts.- Did you just wake up? -comes on inside-

RILEY: yeah. -she runs a hand through her hair and shuts the door- i set a few alarms but i guess the volume was too low or something. hopefully it doesn't ruin your breakfast experience with me looking like this shit. -she snorts- you want anything to drink?

DIRK: -he is having a hard time with auditory processing right now, belatedly answering as he takes a seat. it took a second to get through everything she said, and figure out what he should respond to.- Uh... Yes. DIRK: Orange juice?

RILEY: -there's so much silence in between and she's barely awake as it is so she turns to look at him when he responds. she nods, heading for the fridge.- that's a weird thing for me to have in here, but i do thanks to your--to me deciding to smuggle some from the cafeteria. -she returns to him with the juice and hands it over before taking a seat next to him-

DIRK: -he's a little quicker on the uptake that time and snorts.- It's cool. I keep a bunch of food in my room, too. Not all of it I purchased on my own. -sips his juice. so much better than apple juice. get fucked, dave.-

RILEY: you gotta stock up sometimes, right? sometimes you need a change of pace from that cafeteria. -she pauses- you look exhausted.

DIRK: ... Do I? Guess that makes sense. DIRK: I've had a few busy days.

RILEY: -she nods- aren't you technically the busiest person on this thing?

DIRK: I ought to be. Don't think the person runnin' the show should be kickin' it back while everyone works. -turns the cup in his hands, trying to think of a subject change that isn't too jarring.- DIRK: That reminds me... How did John's meeting go? DIRK: I mean, I know how it went because he recorded it for me. But how did it go from the perspective of the department's newest addition?

RILEY: -looks somewhat surprised- oh. right. that. RILEY: i mean. i really have nothing to compare it to. i don't know how this stuff works, it's way out of my field. but...i mean. RILEY: it seemed good? right?

DIRK: -nods- It was good. DIRK: You did good, too. DIRK: Only thing I'm lamenting about it is now I gotta turn in my stash. Fuckin' bummer. -siiiip-

RILEY: yeah, that part was disappointing. couldn't exactly raise hell objecting, though. don't have enough cred for that.

DIRK: Guess I'll just have to burn through what I can. -snickers a little- DIRK: Don't think John's suggesting an all out war on drugs, though. I think I should be safe. -casually talks about smoking weed to his mom-

RILEY: -laughs- well, hey. if you need some help getting through it...

DIRK: -laughs in earnest along with her- Ok. I'll hit you up. DIRK: Also, ah... I was wondering how... dad is doing? -surprised he isn't here, actually. he was under the impression they're attached at the hip now.-

RILEY: thanks. -pauses a little like it's totally unexpected he would ask that- oh you mean with the whole...? -gestures at her face-

DIRK: Yeah. The whole. -also gestures to face- DIRK: I've been uh. Dealing with it. DIRK: With Dualscar, I mean.

RILEY: oh, good. that was so fucking...ugh. -she sits back, sighing- like. okay. taking a swing at him and calling me a hooker is warranted, sure. but it didn't have to be in front of a one year old. and he's okay. sounds like a doofus but it's getting better.

DIRK: -slowly looks at her- He called you a what?

DIRK: -KILL BILL SIRENS-

RILEY: -waves her hand- don't freak out. he didn't say the word hooker. just a couple of different piratey equivalents. that's not what's important here.

DIRK: ... I guess not.

DIRK: -huffs- I'm glad he's ok, then.

DIRK: It'd be cool if he quit getting himself into trouble, though.

RILEY: -snorts- look, honey. if he hasn't quit by now, he ain't gonna quit at all. he also likes to get in the faces of people way taller than him. it's like magnetic.

RILEY: he'd like to hear you say that, you know.

RILEY: that you're glad he's okay.

DIRK: -amuses himself thinking about derek going toe to toe with someone a good foot taller than him.- Well... I'm sure he would.

RILEY: wouldn't hurt, either. just saying.

DIRK: -noncommital grumbling-

DIRK: Alright. I'll talk to him.

RILEY: -slowly smiles- cool. thanks.

RILEY: even if you're dragging your feet doing it.

RILEY: means a lot.

DIRK: It isn't even that awful. He just... gets on my nerves now. -grumpy about it-

DIRK: ... All this reminds me though.

DIRK: Last year on the fourth of July, he somehow convinced me to set off fireworks with him in the atrium.

DIRK: It freaked everyone out and got us landed in detainment.

DIRK: ... -snorts- It was so stupid.

RILEY: -gives him such a MOM LOOK- are you fucking serious? setting off fireworks? in a ship? RILEY: your ass is grounded.

DIRK: I told you it was stupid! DIRK: He seems to have that kind of effect on people.

DIRK: ... That sounded meaner than I meant it to.

RILEY: -laughs- was that aimed at me or...?

DIRK: -looks embarrassed- No. I meant in general...

RILEY: -nudges him- good. cuz i'd like to take credit for all my stupid shit. that's mine.

RILEY: but i know what you mean. he does have that effect.

RILEY: like i said. magnet.

[gulescamisade]

Mega Texas:  Day 8, Old Frenemies

ARADIA: -she's taking a nap, it seems, and it really sounds like she's mumbling something about feferi and terezi-

TYRENA: -She's sitting... nearby. In a manner that would appear like eavesdropping.-

ARADIA: -she is OUT-

DIRK: -since their destination is more or less within city limits, dirk has pulled the car into some abandoned lot where he's trying to get as much information on the oil refinery as possible from his device. he glances back at tyrena and aradia when he hears her mumbling.- ... DIRK: -casually eavesdrops too-

ARADIA: yes...snow...

DIRK: - 👂 ✋-

ARADIA: alaska

DIRK: ... -murmurs at her- (What about Alaska?)

TYRENA: Y0U CAN WAKE HER Y0URSELF 1F Y0U TH1NK SHE'LL TELL Y0U

ARADIA: (dead)

DIRK: ...

DIRK: -gives tyrena a concerned glance. not that it means TOO much... aradia would likely just say (dead) under her breath while conscious, too. but it's unsettling either way.-

TYRENA: -SHE DOES NOT APPRECIATE HIS BODY LANGUAGE AT ALL-

TYRENA: -she's still just listening with the same expression-

ARADIA: i know

DIRK: ... -well, eventually she'll wake up and he can prod her about it then. for now, there are other things to discuss.-

DIRK: I've managed to download a map of the refinery. It's pretty basic google maps shit, but it's better then nothing. I sent it to everyone's devices. Also highlight potential points of entry.

TYRENA: AND 0UR G0AL 1S T0 SAB0TAGE WHATEVER WE CAN MANAGE

TYRENA: 1 PRESUME

ARADIA: -sits up, awake now, yawning-

DIRK: That's the idea.

---

[ANYWAY, some time has passed and it's dark out now, one single street lamp lighting the abandoned lot they're parked in. Dirk has exited the vehicle, calling everyone together so he can properly run them through the very loose plans he's created.]

DIRK: You might have noticed I've forwarded a map of the refinery to all your devices. In case you've been snoozin' since yesterday, in the spirit of the events past and future, both in Flavortown and D.C., we're going to fuck up one of the Empress' sources of income.

DIRK: I've circled a few entry points. -shows off the map via projection from his own device- There's a fence all around the perimeter. I don't know if it's just your standard fence, if it's barbed wire, or electric... But we've got the resources to pass it in whichever case, I'm sure.

DIRK: Our best bets are to either come around the back where most of the tanks are... Or around the front.

DIRK: Perks to the back -- less likely for there to be activity there and we can sabotage their storage right off the bat.

DIRK: There appear to be offices around the front. Might be more useful to fuck up documentation and what have yous.

DIRK: Ideally, we'll be able to fuck up the entire complex. But we gotta start somewhere.

EQUIUS: -He is tired, and he is hangry. Mostly, he's ready.-

DIRK: -eat some doritos friend-

EQUIUS: D --> I would vote for the back. They will not care to protect their logistics when the livelihood has been destroyed

TYRENA: 1 1MAG1NE F1RES W1LL BE HARD TO SUPPRESS 1N TH1S DRY HEAT TYRENA: SURR0UNDED BY V0LAT1LE L1QU1DS

NEPETA: =She has this grass for you Equius..... why won't you EAT IT.=

NEPETA: :33 < since pawffices have more boring paper work we could rig a fire in the front while going through the back! they'll be too busy putting out all the flames and it'd be purriority to not let things blow up here since theyd blow up a lot!

TYRENA: Y0U ARE ADV1S1NG WE SPL1T UP TYRENA: WE NEED A RENDEV0US P01NT

NEPETA: :33 < eifur that pawre we have something ready to set off a sneaky fire then sneak pawround the back

NEPETA: :33 < ...do we have something we can make with that? :00

ARADIA: -looking off a little while everyone is talking-

TYRENA: YES

TYRENA: 0NE 0F MY SPEC1F1CAT10NS

TYRENA: PRESUM1NG THAT D0ES N0T DEFEAT THE PURP0SE

EQUIUS: -Flexes irritably-

DIRK: I always have the means for fashioning small time bombs.

TYRENA: ARE Y0U V0LUNTEER1NG T0 SET 1T, AS WELL?

EQUIUS: -Set it and forget it-

DIRK: -nods- I can definitely do that.

TYRENA: -NODS AT THAT, THEN-

TYRENA: SEEMS S0METH1NG APPR0ACH1NG A PLAN

TYRENA: G01NG T0 HAVE T0 W0RK QU1CK

TYRENA: 1 GUARAUNTEE THEY'RE EXPECT1NG US

TYRENA: THEY D1D BR1NG US HERE, AFTER ALL

NEPETA: =Looks to Aradia also, she's been acting a little weird=

NEPETA: :33 < well have to be supurr secret shadow fightpurrs >:33

ARADIA: -looks back at nepeta and seems to snap out of it- as discreet as possible

EQUIUS: D --> Simple enough

DIRK: -closes the projection and puts his comm away- Cool.

DIRK: We're about a mile from the refinery here. -gestures to it just down the way. all lit up, pumping chemicals out into the atmosphere... beautiful.-

DIRK: Figure we can hoof it or... Equius can work his literal magic on the cars, if that's feasible.

DIRK: Either way, discreet is definitely the name of the game.

DIRK: That's mostly a reminder to myself. Y'all know how flashy I can be. -waves a hand.-

EQUIUS: D --> What are you e%pecting of me, to devise cloaking for the vehicles

ARADIA: can you do that

DIRK: If you can... That'd give us an advantage.

DISCIPLE: -SOMETHING LOUDLY CLICKS. she is holding her large crossbow. It apparently got larger in the day since they made plans to attack this place.-

DISCIPLE: :33

EQUIUS: -Sighs-

EQUIUS: D --> I will see what I can manage -Empties a shit ton of random tech from his sylladex and gets to work-

DIRK: I didn't mean build something. I mean like... DIRK: -spirit fingers-

ARADIA: -does spirit fingers also-

EQUIUS: D --> .....

DIRK: -thank you aradia-

EQUIUS: D --> That's much easier, yes

DIRK: -spirit fingers turn into two thumbs up-

DISCIPLE: Rrrr. She is getting anxious. Is any more we must do?

EQUIUS: -Forgive him. He's tired...and hunger-

NEPETA: =nuzzles on Disciple and purrs=

NEPETA: :33 < that should be it! h33h33h33 mewve b33n purpawring a lot!

DISCIPLE: Yes. MUCH preparation. -She rumble.- DISCIPLE: Is restless. We burn the blood of the earth and she shall have none of it again.

DIRK: -claps hands together- Let's go Wildcats.

DISCIPLE: -YOWLS-

EQUIUS: -Alternatively he could just chuck the cars in-

NEPETA: =Wee=

DIRK: -there are a FEW flaws with that plan......-

DIRK: -GETS IN HIS CAR. void him up stud-

NEPETA: =climbs on the car, void her up steed=

DISCIPLE: -She's going to sit on the roof with her crossbow- >;cc -WARFACE. she pulls on her hood. HER WARFACE IS NOW ALSO A LIONFACE-

NEPETA: 800 ✨ ✨

EQUIUS: -Gets in the other car, here they go. A nice sheen of sweat precipitates on his body as his very existence becomes hazy to...well...everyone. This is much easier than the whole ship. As long as Dirks vehicle stays close to his they are completely undetectable-

ARADIA: -good job. You're doing good-

NEPETA: =VROOM. She's holding onto the hood with her claws feeling the wind, the excitement of the BRAWL-TO-BE=

DIRK: -leads them down the road... but eventually he takes them OFF road, a short distance from the fence near the back entry point. hidden behind some... bushes... they aren't great cover, considering they're all dry and brambly, but so long as they're mostly cloaked by the dark of night, it should be fine until they need to get away. which is why he's parking them OUTSIDE.-

ARADIA: -watching everything as it passes from inside one of the cloaked vehicles-

NEPETA: =Equius do you wanna try nibbling on this bush?=

EQUIUS: -No.-

DIRK: -liar-

EQUIUS: -He could just void teleport and leave y'all here...-

NEPETA: =You didn't want dirt, or grass, or bush, WhaT WILL YOU EAT?=

NEPETA: =She could BITE HIS BUTT=

EQUIUS: -Bring me the blood of the condesce-

NEPETA: =Also while arguing she's scoping the facility=

[It's your pretty basic oil refinery. But it's QUITE LARGE. At some point all the storage tanks were painted pink. Incredible. They can also see the fence is barbed wire.]

DIRK: -gets out of the car and looks towards the others.- Alright. I'm gonna go set up the distraction, you guys work on getting in around the back. I'll meet up with you there. -and he's gone in a flash (step.) he's gotta make this quick.-

TYRENA: -She cracks her neck-

TYRENA: 1S THAT CHA1N L1NK?

NEPETA: =Nods and scampers to the back entrance. Barbed wire, PSH. How high is it?=

ARADIA: -exits the car also and just barely flinches-

[I am chainlink, the fence would helpfully inform Tyrena, if only it could speak. It would also tell them that it's roughly 12 ft high, but those who still have their eyeballs should be able to deduce that.]

NEPETA: :33 < it is and pawbout two and a half mes high!

TYRENA: -She's gonna walk up to it and put her hand on it and TEST IF IT SHOCKS HER-

[IT'S SHOCKING... How anticlimactic this action is. Because she doesn't get shocked.]

EQUIUS: -Hups Nepeta and Disciple over the fence-

NEPETA: =WEE, she does a flip. FOR STYLE=

TYRENA: -She's going to rip a hole with her ROBOT STRENGTH.-

TYRENA: -and pass through. Hrm. Nothing out of the ordinary yet...-

EQUIUS: -I MEAN. OKAY-

DIRK: -with a skip and a flash jump dirk manages to clear the fence near the front. when he finds the closest building, slaps a little bit of plastic explosives right along the side, then zips over towards another small building to use it as cover... then... BOOM. enough to blow a humble hole in the wall and catch some of the interior and shubbery on fire. TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION!! scurry crouches through the shadows towards the others.-

[The others are in the middle of all these pink storage tanks. Round and ready to be drained of their precious life blood.]

NEPETA: =Oh she'll stab ya=

ARADIA: -flies over the fence-

[Now that they've caused a DISTRACTION, they better do as much damage as they can while they can. They can hear shouting from the other side of the facility as workers rush to deal with the fire and investigate it's cause. Other than that, however, there doesn't seem to be too much activity around...]

DIRK: -except DIRK notices something while making the trek over there... the armored cars they saw yesterday are parked over here. zoinks.-

EQUIUS: -PUNCHES A TANK. Goobye-

NEPETA: =She's gonna go around and start jabbing holes in these tanks from the backs, it's not going to be that great for the ground but.... yknow=

ARADIA: -CALM YOUR ASS DOWN-

EQUIUS: -Uproots another tank and tosses it in the direction of the fire, soaking everything in its path in gasoline. What was that Aradia?-

DIRK: -ROLLS to avoid getting squished by a tank. goddamn, hulk. he's not complaining. that'd be an A+ way to go.-

NEPETA: =Look at him go, she sighs.... while slashing things=

[There is something approaching at breakneck speeds-- some kind of BLUE STREAK. A whirling metal orb weathed in energy weaves around the trail of gas from the hurled tank, crackling with some kind of energy as it spins through the air-- suddenly launching directly at Equius, the most obvious source of the damage.]

NEPETA: =What the balling heck=

EQUIUS: -What the tinglefloops?-

ARADIA: get down

EQUIUS: -This is fast, faster than he can dodge. He braces his arms to block.-

[ IT STRIKES INTO HIM like a pinball, or a spinball, or a SONIC SPINBALL FOR THE SEGA GENESI]

[ It slams into the beefy arms with considerable force, dust and wind kicked up as it ricochets up into the air, swiftly uncuring to reveal some manner of... troll? Covered in plates not unlike an armadillo, a pair of glowing eyes fix on the group, scanning them over slowly as it comes to land on top of one of the tanks with surprising grace for someomeone with such sharply limited range of motion.]

[ He leaps into the air, curling at the apex of his leap and beginning to spin, that blue energy wrapping around his body again as his RPMs rise dramatically before even touching the ground. There is a screech and he flies forward, again, head-on directly at Equius, as though testing him.]

NEPETA: =Oh... not a ball. A troll. An old friend. Trolld friend if you will. Seeing them again is reassuring but also. Not at all. Hurt flashes over her face then anger and fear=

NEPETA: :33 < wait!! =Wait what... don't hurt them?? And to who it's to she doesn't really know. She probably should've done more preparing for this instead of pushing it into the back of her vault=

EQUIUS: -okay that is ENOUGH, sir. Equius lets out a low hiss, but this time the rollie trollie is met with a STRONG punch-

[ROLY POLY TROLLY strikes head on with fist, taking no obvious damage from the STRONG punch but flying through the air in almost directly the opposite direction, with almost no inertia.]

EQUIUS: -But is there a sproing sound-

[PROBABLY]

EQUIUS: -Sick-

NEPETA: =She hopes there's a sproing but her hair is also on end and she's just anxiously watching them pshooo into the distance=

NEPETA: :33 < (mmrrnnrngnngnrngrnng) equihiss!-- ughhhhhhh =anxious pacing cat, she's not GOOD AT THIS SHIT=

EQUIUS: D --> What

[ Probably would have kept going, but a large set of whiplike lashes latch onto the troll in air-- still spinning, but held laterally by another figure. Long, mechanical tendrils holding the ball about twenty feet over her head, sticking out of a set of mechanical hands that look to have been useless for any function other than handling these things.]

[ This one stares at them as the air grows colder, somehow, a layer of ice thickly forming over the glowing, spinning sphere.]

DIRK: -ARRIVES. sword: out. he is forcibly ejected from the oil refinery... except not really. not yet.-

DIRK: Now this seems a little excessive. -stupid freak show military task force-

NEPETA: =Remember that one time she opened up then shoveled it away forever? Mmmm regrets on that one=

NEPETA: :33 < FUCK =Scrambles about=

NEPETA: :33 < just, MOVE run! =sHOVES him=

[ U THINK IT'S EXCESSIVE? It is excessive. That glowing ball of troll is being covered in ice-- FEET OF ICE, even, as it's got about a ten foot radius as she slams it on the ground. It has lost no momentum and is already skidding across the ground at them.]

DISCIPLE: -YOWLS as she scurries up one of the tanks.-

EQUIUS: -IS SHOVED-

EQUIUS: D --> Nepeta what is your major malfunction

NEPETA: :33 < =What's YOUR major malfunction= its my =huffs at all this crashing and just pounces, gonna haul Eq if she has to, ears lowered though she's angry= its my old pawry unit

EQUIUS: D --> What? What are they doing here? Why -He's moving he's moving SHEESH NEP-

[They just barely manage to avoid getting trampled by a big sphere of ice, but as it passes them by, it abruptly explodes-- shards flying EVERYWHERE. These two do not appear to be happy to see them. They do not appear to be betraying much of anything with their blank expressions.]

[The armadilo lands to the ground, finally stopped momentarily as the two of them begin approaching from either side of the group.]

NEPETA: :33 < g33! i should ask their puppeted robodies >:'''CC =She's got the claws out and slashing the shards that come their way but also she doesn't want to have to kill them=

EQUIUS: D --> Puppets...We have to find a way to incapacitate them

DIRK: -well, he's a bit out of the loop having arrived late from the other side of the sudden battle field, so he's leaping into action from behind to slice at ms. freeze.-

NEPETA: =Bless her horse=

[Speaking of horses and blessing them a figure looms behind the Equinep pair. A dangerous tail raised then striking down on them]

EQUIUS: -Equius is distracted and thus struck by the fiendish appendage. He goes skidding a ways away-

AZLOYA: -Ms. Whips, or Azloya as Nepeta would know her, lets out an inhuman noise as maroon blood spills from her back. Her skin is a little too rough-- that slice might have bisected an unaugamented troll like her. She flips forward, mechanical tendrils latching onto the ground as she flips upside down, the many arms scuttling like some kind of octopus as a blue sphere goes flying towards Dirk from the far side of the yard.-

NEPETA: =DOOF, THERE THEY GO. Nepeta goes skidding too= [The figure doesn't let up however. It pounces right for Equius. It's a Nep....borg. Complete with scorpion tail and perma wolverine claws]

EQUIUS: -Pushing himself up, he takes in this figure, but more importantly his rail was hurt. Old unit or not, Equius lets out a loud hiss before charging and unleashing a flurry of blows-

DIRK: -her scuttling is a little distracting -- but even MORE distracting is ANOTHER NEPETA?? he doesn't notice the sphere until it's almost making impact. shIT, he turns his sword up in hopes he might shield himself/slice the ice.-

NEPETA: =She's not so sure how to feel about seeing herself, what she would've been... Looking at Dirk he might need help so she glances back just trying to fight and concentrate. Taking out some darts from her old work, good for paralysis. SHOOTS them at Azloya=

BORGPETA: =Is very agile and bendy, it even has Nepeta's same fighting style, liquid catting around the blows then jumping back to strike Equius with her tail again=

[NO ICE THIS TIME. Just a big ball of blue energy. It might still do some pretty serious damage--]

TYRENA: -but it's a good thing that dirk isn't actually fighting these borgs alone. A kick from the side-- sharp and rather delicately timed-- sends the troll skidding to the left of running into his blade by inches.- AZLOYA: -The figure turns as something hits her-- still scuttling on her fingertips, it would seem, as the needle sinks into her skin. She's bleeding and a bit battered, but it's not slowing her hands or those limbs down, yet. Raising each finger and slamming it down, trying to cut right through Nepeta.-

TYRENA: 1 HEARD WHAT SHE SA1D

TYRENA: WHAT THEY ARE

TYRENA: WE MAY N0T HAVE THE K1ND OF T1ME T0 BE G00D PE0PLE R1GHT N0W -she eyes dirk and eyes the blue ball-- Liekit-- as it smashes into the building behind them.-

NEPETA: =Oh that's bad news. She tries to jump and dodge the tendrils. Please do not. You still owe her 5 bucks and this isn't how you get out a debt=

NEPETA: :33 < im not leaving them like this! =hisses at Tyrena. She will fight you too=

AZLOYA: -Her body is slightly limp, but the fingers are still going. Slice. Slice. Slice. Each time she does, a bit more frost builds on the ground, growing strange and slippery and so very not texas.-

EQUIUS: -Oh gdi. It's like sparring with Nep except for the unbridled rage he feels. He attempts to grab the tail, planning to slam the robo into a tanker-

NEPETA: =Azzy stop she's trying to prove a point about saving you guys. Parts of her jacket are getting the slice as she rolls and starts to dash for the octo-pa=

BORGPETA: =Equius gets his hand on the tail but at the expense of being stuck lower in the arm by the hollow tip. Poison, it's poisonous=

AZLOYA: -She's got the high ground, and MANY lims with which to do the slicing. But as Nepeta starts to run, she does another flip-- launching herself down at her, legs first, attempting to plant her boots on her chest.-

DIRK: -he just about bit it there... thank you, tyrena. he glances between everyone, frowning- Seems like they don't give a shit about the property damage either. -stays on the defensive for whenever sanic comes back around.-

[As if things weren't chaotic enough, someone in the distance is taking aim, right at the big horse after he's been stabbed by a poisonous tail... And shooting a net in the hopes of capturing him within it's crackling electric webbing.]

DISCIPLE: -!! -Yowls suddenly! THE HORSE-

NEPETA: =UGHHHH, she looks at Equius getting shanked in the arm and DOOF takes heavy boots right in the chest, but grabs and jabs more of Spiny's venom into this leg=

EQUIUS: -Hisses out in pain but tosses this imposter nep Mario 64'style. So long gay bowser! Then heckerdoodle! He's netted and hissing angrily at the electricity coursing through his body. FREE HIM-

BORGPETA: =Goes sailing into a bomb, only just into the distance=

AZLOYA: -GrGH. This should be easy now... she drunkenly swings the tendrils at her, trying to rake it against her, but her body isn't obeying its orders... staggering and increasingly weak.-

DISCIPLE: -She's jumping down pulling a bone knife and trying to cut the electrified net. It probably hURTS TO TRY THAT THOUGH. This isn't a great plan.-

[oh hey, speaking of, Liekit steps out. Not rolling this time... slow and deliberate footsteps as they approach Dirk this time. Many, many spines extend from their body with a sickly, lurhcing sound, along with the crackle of psionic energy.]

????: -the shooter steps onto the scene, reloading his weapon as he approaches disciple. he's a rather weathered and stern looking seadweller- I wouldn't do th^t if I were you. DIRK: -he bristles -- not at the troll approaching him with such measured steps so much as the voice he hears behind him. a voice he recognizes, and had hoped he'd never hear again. the Militant.-

DIRK: -it's disarming, but he squares up against liekit.- We got this. -assures tyrena before flash stepping over to flank liekit and divide his attention. but avoids the spines, of course.- You're too slow.

DISCIPLE: -growls as she drops the knife, pulling her crossbow again.-

EQUIUS: -Hissing and trying to free himself-

NEPETA: =FRIEND SHANK shANK SHANK SHAnk. She is also getting the first good look of Azloya she's had in... a long time and it makes her want to whimper but ALSO THERE'S SOME SALTY GRANDPA NETTING HER RAIL=

DISCIPLE: She has no words for this. For him.

NEPETA: =SALTY GRANDPA=

LIEKIT: -He bristles-- LITERALLY-- at Dirk. The divide of attention seems to work, though the sharp, electrified spines launch from his back in a spray of needles at him—

TYRENA: --as she swings a kick at his soft underbelly.- AZLOYA: -She looks... worse for wear. In so many ways. There isn't even a glimmer of recognition as she begins to stumble, tendrils still lashing violently at anything and everything that they can reach-- which is so very much.-

AZLOYA: -As the poison takes over she simply slumps over, fallen, the limbs still squirming and thrashing.-

NEPETA: =DEFINITELY GOT THE BUSINESS END OF SOME OF THOSE LASHES, can she capta Azloya's body? If so into the dex it goes and Neps gonna try to shoot darts at the SALTY GRANDPA NEXT......=

BORGPETA: =Bitch you thought, POUNCES=

[Commense cat scuffle]

EQUIUS: -Pure adrenaline is the only thing keeping Equius from outright succumbing to the poison.-

DISCIPLE: -She flinches as the duplicate jumps on Nepeta, eyes trained on the sudden scuffle, as she turns on the stranger again.- If you are responsible for this, there will be no mercy. None. -Despite the fact that the gun is trained on her, she still attempts to fire a bolt at him.-

DIRK: -manages to deflect some of those needles, but he takes a few more hits jerkily. SHOCKING. he shakes it off as best he can.-

MILITANT: -DRAW. he takes a shot at the at the same time, aiming carefully enough so her arrow will at least get thrown off by the net, even if he doesn't manage to capture the cat. he can only do so much at once, however, and finds himself stuck with poison darts. for the moment, it seems like only a minor inconvenience to him. SCOFF.-

[Meanwhile, the net is strong, but maybe not strong enough for MUTANT AMOUNTS OF STRENGTH. ]

DISCIPLE: -SHE FALLS TO THE GROUND, convulsing under the net.-

NEPETA: =GET BIPPED GRANDPA=

NEPETA: =Wait no!=

TYRENA: -She pulls her sword out-- for a second, before throwing it aside-

TYRENA: AUUUUGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

TYRENA: HE W0N'T D1E

TYRENA: G0

TYRENA: HELP W1TH THAT 1NSTEAD

EQUIUS: -He can break these cuffs! And so he does, dragging himself up to his feet a bit woozy but nevertheless charging at the militant, whipping the remains of this net AT HIS FACE-

LIEKIT: -wheezes temporarily, but launches even more spines at Tyrena. She twitches, but all the electricity hardly seems to bother her.-

TYRENA: -she swings both fists down at the METAL PLATED HEAD.-

ARADIA: -lands from...wherever the hell she's been, knowing it's now her time to interfere. Her whip's out though, AND SHE ATTEMPTS to CRACK IT ON LIEKIT-

LIEKIT: -STAGGERS AND FLINCHES at both the strike and the whip-crack, beginning to whirr and kick up sand-- hurling at Tyrena and attempting to RICOCHET towards Aradia.-

TYRENA: -DOOF-

NEPETA: =Pins this.... weird..... version of herself=

BORGPETA: =Goes to stab with the tail, CATCH THIS BUSINESS END=

NEPETA: =Oh no, not the business end! She rolls and catches the entire end of the business right through her arm but also enough to let the bot stab itself. Haha.... ehhhhh this is weird=

DIRK: -BACK INTO THE FRAY I belatedly write after he's given the OK from tyrena to leave. adrenaline pushes him forward, but there's memories haunting his thoughts as he approaches the militant.-

MILITANT: -turns to face the charging blue blood, now drawing a cutlass from his specibus to hack back at the net. he doesn't seem phased much by that either.-

MILITANT: It's funny we should cross p^ths here. -tilts head to look at dirk who he KNOWS is rushing at him.-

DIRK: -oH OK. HE HESITATES.-

ARADIA: -she saw this coming, so she attempts to fly up as soon as likeit ricochets to her in order to dodge-

EQUIUS: -NO HESITATION! CATCH THESE HANDS OLD TIMER. ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA!-

LIEKIT: -AS HE WHIRLS INTO THE AIR even more spines spray out, using that momentum to really try and launch them at the two of them.-

ARADIA: -DOOF. She's not invincible, and at least one of the spines pierces her leg. Oops. Still gonna WHIP-

MILITANT: -bobs and weaves, turning the rifle in his hand to swing the blunt end at equius' head. he's spry for an old man but the strength behind the strike is definitely characteristic of a seadweller.-

????: -ANOTHER CHALLENGER APPROACHES. a blue blood in a clean military uniform aims her own crossbow at nepeta. ER... WAIT. WHICH IS WHICH?? clearly she isn't the most competant fighter here...FIRES WILLY NILLY-- but at the wrong nepeta. whoops.-

DUOCATBALL: =Someone gets pierced by an arrow and the whoel ball slumps over=

LIEKIT: -it feels kinda like getting tazed, but at least the lash knocks him groundward.-

TYRENA: -INTO HER. But that seems to have been her plan, as his back-- and all the crackling psionic energy-spikes-- collide into her skin.-

TYRENA: -She may or may not be bleeding, it's hard to tell with all of the sparking and flashing. She is, however, getting him in a chokehold, of sorts, with the only leverage she can manage around the big ball. Go to sleep.-

NEPETA: =She got to look herself in the eyes and watch as the arrow lodged in Borgpeta's throat bled her out with twitchy convulsions= 8))

????: { = Oh, SHOOT! = } -curses in the distance. she did a bad...-

ARADIA: -jolts and loses her balance, wings not being much assistance here until the tase feeling wears off, where she attempts to SUPPORT TYRENA should ball escape-

NEPETA: =Shoot is RIGHT. Something to focus on, someone to focus on she. Growls then roars at the arrow firer, she's bleeding and poisoned and also just fueled on regret, trauma, and confusion. Hello, feast upon her foot=

TYRENA: -he doesn't SEEM to be. He keeps trying to spin, or flail, or launch more needles, but it doesn't exactly work-- the tazing sensation in Aradia's leg gives way, and it's not bleeding TOO badly, but she's effectively got him wrangled.- TYRENA: -But it's... strange. She's just taking all of the energy. Her more obviously cybernetic components glow a faint blue.-

????: { = !!!! = } -YELPS as she gets a boot to the face. it hurts, and she hits the ground, but what she lacks in form she makes up in toughness, so she starts to roll away almost immediately after absorbing all that shock-

EQUIUS: -Gets a gun butt TO THE FACE-Equius reels, spitting out a bit of blood as his glasses fall off his face in shards. He's going back in for more cqc!-

ARADIA: -WHATS A LITTLE BLOOD AM I RIGHT? she's watching tyrena, still on support-

NEPETA: =HISS, she's gonna leap on this troll and BITE IT=

MILITANT: -he's going to get a gut full of blade if he comes much closer—

DIRK: -until he unfreezes himself long enough to grab the militant's arm and wrench it behind his back before he can stab at equius.-

MILITANT: -drops the cutlass, his cool expression cracking. he takes another swing behind him to try to get dirk in the face while also twisting his arm out of the human's hold.-

DIRK: -HE DUCKS, but this whole manuever has them breaking apart and distancing each other. he skids to a stop next to equius.- I know he's all decrepit and shit but he's tougher than he looks.

MILITANT: -picks up his short sword again, circling around the other two men and waiting for their next move.- I wish I could s^y the s^me of you. H^ve you gone soft, Dirk?

EQUIUS: -Yes-

DIRK: -NO! ... yes-

ROXY: =SOMEWHERE FAR AWAY. he's always at halfmast, she got ur back bby=

DIRK: -he's so thankful he has such supportive people in his life now-

????: -OH RIGHT SHE'S HERE TOO. nepeta will have to CATCH HER FIRST as she scuttles on all fours before she hops onto her feet and sprints to hide behind a tank.-

NEPETA: =Scampers up the tank to get the DROP on her=

TYRENA: -She throws the troll down, and lifts her head towards Aradia, directly.- TYRENA: N0T K1LL1NG TH1S 0NE

TYRENA: Y0U MAKE SURE 0F 1T

TYRENA: -She seems to just... wander off, in fact, as she grabs her blades again.-

ARADIA: -she nods. UNDERSTOOD-

????: -WAH!!! splat. she's squished under cat.- { = Wait, don't hurt me! = }

EQUIUS: D --> Understood -Shakes his head. FOCUS Equius.-

[ In the not-too-distant distance, one of the pipelines just straight up explodes, even more smoke rising into the sky.]

EQUIUS: D --> Dirk, attack him from above -Because he's about to do something cool. Instead of attacking him head on, Equius STRONG PUNCHES the ground cracking the concrete and causing a localized tremor around the militant-

NEPETA: :33 < =DOES IT ANYWAY, but she's still poisoned and her arm is shaky and numb so she just rests the claws against the troll's throat= mew had no troupawl shooting at me, why shouldn't i? =bares teeth boohiss=

MILITANT: -uh oh, he wasn't quite expecting THAT... he needs to get his sea legs back, because the tremor definitely has him losing his balance.-

DIRK: -blips above him, ready to bear down on the militant with an aerial slice.-

MILITANT: -reacts to that only just quickly enough, blocking the strike with his own blade, but it doesn't stop dirk from colliding into him. he lands on his back, still on the defensive.-

DIRK: -it's a power struggle alright -- the militant has more strength then him, but he manages to keep pressing his blade down on the other... until it slips.-

MILITANT: -HA-- he cuts at dirk, leaving a nasty gash across his cheek.-

DIRK: -NOT HIS FACE. fucking... slaps the cutlass out of his hand and just starts WAILING on the militant instead. this is incredibly personal.-

????: { = T-That-- .... Is a good point... = } -wheezes, looking around for some kind of way out of this. then she sees dirk beating the shit out of her friend/boss.-

????: { = W...! Wait... You're from the UU? Is that... Dirk Strider? = }

EQUIUS: -The poison is overriding his adrenaline. Has his body always been this numb? Probably. Hoo...wow okay but...He's gotta help dick...Dirk. Yeah.-

NEPETA: :33 < =Bares teeth= purrhaps. whats it to mew?

DISCIPLE: -SHE'S FINALLY OUT OF THIS HERE NET PROBABLY-

ARADIA: -with an eye on likeit, she quickly flies to equius to check up on him-

DIRK: -he'd react to explosions too if he wasn't too busy remembering this guy kidnapping him as a child, putting him through hell, etc etc... HE JUST WONT STOP PUNCHING. there's purple everywhere.-

NEPETA: =FREE DISCIPLE 2K???=

DISCIPLE: -YES-

EQUIUS: -Yes, feel the anger...drink it.-

????: { = I know him! My name is Lucana Leiqin-- I've been looking for him-- Just ask him?? = }

DIRK: -VIOLENCE BREEDS VIOLENCE BUT IN THE END IT HAS TO BE THIS WAAAAY-

ARADIA: dirk

EQUIUS: -Do it. Kill him.-

EQUIUS: D --> Break...His neck. Let us be on our way -His breathing is becoming labored.-

ARADIA: equius

ARADIA: -her voice raises- dirk

ARADIA: think about your options

DISCIPLE: -Works herself under one of Equius arms, catcrawling at him and looking for that poison stab wound...-

DISCIPLE: -and then she tries to suck on it. IT'S PROBABLY TOO LATE.-

DISCIPLE: -BUT U KNOW HOW IT IS-

EQUIUS: D --> Disciple, your efforts...are appreciated, however I'm sure the poison has worked its way into my system thoroughly -Wheeze-

DISCIPLE: >:CC -2 BAD THIS IS DISTRESSING HER TOO MUCH-

DISCIPLE: -ptoos out some blood-

DIRK: -don't distract him aradia, geez. he does start slowing down though when he hears his name.-

MILITANT: -he's beaten to a pulp, but still here... still conscious enough to talk shit.- Yes-- Think ^bout... your options.

MILITANT: You were m^de for this... Killing me will only prove it.

MILITANT: So why don't you? You've ^ldre^dy... done the Empire ^ ^ f^vor... By te^ring ^p^rt this useless refinery...

DIRK: -pauses, just kind of staring at him-

NEPETA: =Looks Dirkward then huffs and HAULS UP "Lucana"=

NEPETA: :33 < fine, if purr in his fafur then shoot the salty troll grandpa

ARADIA: -REMEMBER...WHO YOU ARE...DIRK...-

LUCANA: -HOIST- { = I-- I can't do that... =} -she's watching this scene, DEEPLY TROUBLED, however-

TYRENA: -She walks towards the rest of the group, singed and burned and covered in holes, none of which appear to be bleeding all that much. The fires are probably going to keep going for a while yet, as she approaches the group.-

NEPETA: :33 < he s33ms k33n on killing who you came here fur and given purr options you have no choice :33

EQUIUS: -Leaning on this cat. He's really tired....-

DISCIPLE: -:xx-

DISCIPLE: -she's not quite sure what to DO about that... or how bad the poison is. purrs anxiously.-

MILITANT: -grabs at dirk's throat. he's still got enough strength in him to break his squishy fragile human neck. DO IT, DIRK. KILL HIM BEFORE HE KILLS HIM.-

DIRK: -chokes, hesitating still...-

LUCANA: -SHE CAN'T KILL HIM!! she's loyal to the empire, even if she wants to save dirk... but cipher is kind of a dick... but... killing him might get her in trouble—

DIRK: -but it doesn't matter, as he slams his fist into the militant's face one last time with the last bit of strength he can muster. the grip on his throat loosens.-

NEPETA: =growls at this and HAULS her over before the poison gets to her too, she can feel it in the numbness of her arm=

NEPETA: :33 < she claims to know dirk and have b33n looking fur him.... in the not bad way i pawssume =EYEBALLS LADY=

ARADIA: -unsurprised-

EQUIUS: -Wheezing horse, the new mgs villain-

LUCANA: -sweats... ok, so her intentions aren't entirely pure-

DIRK: -looks over at them a little wild eyed and breathing heavily. there's so much blood hello.- ... Lucana?

LUCANA: { = It's me...! = } -oh dirk... she looks at him sympathetically, then around at the others. time to make a decision.-

LUCANA: { = They were going to blow up this facility... And all the other major refinery pipelines across the country. The Empress has little use for it as it is... She wants to flood the crater it would have left behind if you hadn't interfered. = }

LUCANA: { = And I think that's just a little too much! Even for her! Why kill all these people when-- = } -shakes her head. there's not time for rambling.-

LUCANA: { = ... You should get out of here before they send back up. = }

TYRENA: AND D0 WE REALLY TRUST Y0U?

LUCANA: { = What difference does it make? I'm on my own here! You can leave me be and I'll look the other way... Or you can kill me-- Either way, you've got a running start! = } -frowns and glances in the direction of the abandoned convoys...-

ARADIA: -looks toward the others. their choice. their decision.-

NEPETA: :33 < mew say that like its so easy if we just leave mew here without doing anything then efurrything is still going to blow up >:((

NEPETA: :33 < i cant say i trust mew or that we shouldnt kill mew but its pawvious SOMETHING is going on here

TYRENA: HA HA TYRENA: HA HA HA

TYRENA: SHE'S R1GHT, Y0U KN0W

TYRENA: D0 N0T GET ME WR0NG, 1 COULD K1LL Y0U

TYRENA: BUT WE'RE G01NG T0 NEED S0METH1NG BETTER THAN

TYRENA: A RUNN1NG START

TYRENA: -she scoops up a little bit of teal blood from the many holes in her body-- it doesn't look like she has a lot of blood, and she's hardly bleeding at all-- holding the finger towards the girl.-

TYRENA: THEY D0N'T JUST MAKE M0NSTERS 0F SAD L1TTLE MISFIT L0WBL00DS

TYRENA: AND WE NEED T0 GET T0 M1NNES0TA

NEPETA: =Narrows eyes more at that=

LUCANA: -sweats.... but minnesota is... dammit!- { = Fine! Take me with you. I can get you clearance at an airport near here... And you can take a jet to Minnesota! = }

LUCANA: { = But that's... That's really all I'm capable of offering!! = }

ARADIA: -her wings flutter-

TYRENA: G00D

TYRENA: -She sniffs the air, turning her head back towards Dirk.-

TYRENA: D0 Y0U 1NTEND T0 LEAVE THE B0DY HERE

DIRK: ... -finally gets to his feet, shakily. he isn't all here right now. his voice is low when he speaks.-

DIRK: No. -hoists. he's going to drag the militant over to the nearest fire and chuck him into it. now they can leave.-

NEPETA: =....she could've eaten that..=

DIRK: -fried fish-

NEPETA: = :'( =

TYRENA: Y0U ARE MADE F0R N0TH1NG, HUMAN, EXCEPT AN UNCERTA1N EX1STENCE

TYRENA: 1 H0PE Y0U C0NT1NUE T0 REMEMBER THAT -Shes gonna start walking. Sensitive nose like hers, she's got no desire to stay along the flames.-

ARADIA: -watches the flames for a moment. walks closer to the flames on her own. just watching.-

DIRK: -nods slowly as he watches flames consume the last of this awful representative of ideals that ALSO need to die in fire. at least they're working on it. maybe he can finally let go of his ties to it.-

DIRK: -glances at aradia after a moment.- ...

LUCANA: -fidgets, then straightens up her posture and begins to lead them over to one of the convoys. they can all fit in one of these luckily.-

ARADIA: -she's still staring-

NEPETA: =good yes, also she couldn't haul around spiny's venom without having things for poison so she's going to hand that off to someone so she and equiheck can get unpoisoned... she's also thinking about the bodies of her old friends hanging out in her dex. Mmmmnnnggg, what to do with them. She has them at least but... what to do. She's very tired=

DIRK: -pries himself away to follow the group. time to go.-

LUCANA: -she will drive this thing... maybe at gun point if it'll make people feel better.-

ARADIA: -waits a few seconds more before turning around and bringing up the rear-

ARADIA: -her leg is still bleeding but whatever-

[AND THEY'RE DRIVING. They should arrive at the airport sometime tomorrow.]

[colostrumtractatus-blog]

[[ When everyone is least expecting it, a wild power surge is overtaking the ship. For one solid, very scary minute, the engines stop and the lights cut off. The ship is floating in space. RIP in hecking rest, UU. ]] ROXY: =FUCKIN WHOOPS= ROXY: =panicked cursing and fumbling= [[ It's over soon enough. With a distant BANG, another energy surge shudders throughout the ship system and everything begins running as before. The crew can see! But also, what the fuck? It won't take long to figure out the surge had come from the engineering labs. ]] DIRK: -in his quarters, very carefully assembling a sandwich layered with doritos when the lights go out.- What the fuck? DIRK: -and then they come back on.- ... -sighs and leaves the room to try to figure out what the hell just happened. he's messaging anybody who might still be working in engineering right now to see if any of them know what just happened.- DIRK: -EATS THIS CRUNCHY SANDWICH on his way to the labs.- ROXY: =INTENSE SWEATING..... eyeballs her phone.....= ROXY: =STRAIGHTENS ENGINGEERING AND props her feet up. Fingers tented, party hat on her head, overalls dirty as she puts her boots up on the desk...... no foul play here= TEREZI: =Terezi has been on edge since they fled the moon, so her weapon is out in it's (relatively) harmless cane form= TEREZI: =Her vision still feels like someone wiped their hand all over an oil painting, smearing the colors, but she's going to make the best of this pyschadelic picasso-y feel to everything.= TEREZI: =Makes her way to engineering, also giving it an excuse to deliver sollux's weekly salad.= [[ Cool as Roxy acts, there's no denying there's an actual real portal looking machine up and running in the labs. It's as circular as an entrance and... veiled with enough inky blackness to choke a horse. It swirls ominously, leading off to parts unknown. ]] ROXY: =LISTEN= ROXY: =PUTS A SHEET OVER IT... jk she's watching it curiously and almost warily, gun on the table= DIRK: -BUSTS DOWN THE DOOR. except not really. you can't exactly bust down steal sliding doors. he just enters engineering.- ... DIRK: -points at the portal.- That's new. ROXY: ... i thought itd bring the room 2gether [[ Roxy is getting messages from her communicator. Confirmation that it's working. Ping ping. ]] ROXY: =peeps her communicator, it sure is working, she sends corresponding replies= so.... this is a thing 4 a test ROXY: lmao im #2good then again its a cotribubaby =Co-signed with a hornse= DIRK: And... did this knock out all the lights? -approaches the portal and eyeballs-(edited) DIRK: What is it? ROXY: yeeaaaahhhhhhhh this is what done did it ROXY: me n eq and a ghost horse happened..... hes here 2 help apparently and is ghost fef approved TEREZI: =brow lift= 4 L1T3R4L GHOST HORS3? TEREZI: TH4TS TO S4Y, 1M NOT DOUBT1NG YOU ROXY: a horse trapped in a troll spirit ROXY: i call him....... ROXY: sprinkles [[ At this moment, Roxy recieves another message. This one pretty straightforward. "CT: I'm coming out to test it. Standby." ]] DIRK: Ah. DIRK: Sounds legit. ROXY: =looks at her device= sprinkles is on his way DIRK: ... Ok. Now you've lost me. ROXY: the horse troll ROXY: hes got the voidy things like me and eq ROXY: and... hes p dead apparently but he wants to help us and also this old alien race that was wiped out by alternia DIRK: DIRK: So what we've got here is a giant Ouija board. TEREZI: NOBODY L34V3, 4ND R3M3MB3R TO S4Y GOODBY3 WH3N W3 F1N1SH >|O ROXY: p much ROXY: =snrk= DIRK: You're lucky you're so cute, otherwise I'd be pretty pissed you made a horse ghost summoning machine without consulting me. ROXY: =grins and shrugs= ima lovable scamp...... also 2 be fair i didnt think itd be done so soon ROXY: .... then again with 2 workaholics..... :thinking: [[ It's fine. Horuss is dead already and it's not like anything could happen to his GHOST. He's pretty sure. Speaking of the devil... Just as the boundaries of science are pushed, so is the veil of the void. A literal robotic horse is emerging from the dark. This is the body chassis he's chosen to inhabit. Roxy. Behold his mighty metal flanks. ]] HORUSSBOT: -clops onto the scene, hissing out steam from his nostrils. This was happening, this wasn't a fever dream though Horuss would understand if they believed it was. A gloomy sounding voice speaks through a synthetic microphone somewhere... in his body.- I was listening to the entire e%change. If you would allow me to e%plain. HORUSSBOT: Hello. I am here to provide assistance. HORUSSBOT: ... HORUSSBOT: Ro%y. HORUSSBOT: The machine works phenomenonally. E%cellent work. ROXY: =wEHEHZS= ROXY: =inhales, srs face= yes ROXY: ty sprinkles JOHN: -he obviously arrives just in time to witness this happen. w....t....f- DIRK: ... DIRK: ... DIRK: ... TEREZI: ....SH1T! DIRK: -squishes his own cheeks and is just. tiny smile.- JOHN: ......... ROXY: =IDIRK= ROXY: =wheezing noise in her chest... single tear= :'T TEREZI: H4PPY B1RTHD4Y ROXY: from me 2 me the ebst JOHN: what the heck is this JOHN: what the heck is THAT ROXY: john plz dont be fuckin rude JOHN: omg TEREZI: 4 ROBOT HORS3 JOHN, K33P UP JOHN: i can see that but.... ROXY: tthis is sprinkles aka horuss aka horunensea=wheezes shee can't= HORUSSBOT: -Yes. His metal plating catches the light and he holds his goggled horse head up high. He has no idea what a birthday is but if it's anything like a wriggling day...- Horuss. HORUSSBOT: My name is Horuss. TEREZI: 4N 4CTU4L S34B1SCU1T, 1 C4NT B3L13V3 TH1S JOHN: -assumes this is just some weird early thing for dirk's birthday.- ROXY: = TETEREZI= JOHN -ok.jpg.- DIRK: -don't you mean belated... HIS BIRTHDAY WAS YESTERDAY JOHN. - JOHN: -then yes he meant belated dirkus.- DIRK: It's great to meet you, Horuss. HORUSSBOT: I'm sure you have many questions. But please keep a hold on them. HORUSSBOT: I have not been in the physical plane in quite some time and this is... incredibly disorientating. -testing his legs, shifting his weight. Testing his breathing systems. Nickers.- TEREZI: =troll jesus christ= DIXIE CONCLUSION: :eyes: TEREZI: =i reiterate!= DIRK: Actually, I'm willing to accept all of this without question. HORUSSBOT: Then you are more intelligent than you appear to be. -Good job on that. Shakes his mane.- JOHN: -is very not ok with this, but listening to horuss speak has rendered him stunned in silence.- TEREZI: Y34H...W3V3 H4D OUR F41R SH4R3 OF WH4T TH3 4CTU4L FUCKS TEREZI: T4K3 YOUR T1M3 OR13NT1NG TO TH3 L4ND OF TH3 L1V1NG DIRK: ... -wonders what about him doesn't appear intelligent.- TEREZI: =the shades, probably= DIXIE CONCLUSION: -Clip clop, clip clop. He wants to scan the visitor with his sensors. In other words, sniff the other hornse.- DIRK: -fuck.......- DIRK: -takes pictures- TEREZI: =a few sweeps ago, this would have been reaaaaaally strange to her= HORUSSBOT: -brays threateningly- E%cuse me. Lesser creature. TEREZI: =laughs= TEREZI: WH1CH ON3? DIXIE CONCLUSION: -Snuffle. Snort. Twitches ears.- DIRK: -sends these pictures RIGHT to jake without context- JOHN: -he thought he was numb to oddness but this is too much.- HORUSSBOT: -whirring aggressively. He's not happy about this close inspection. - HORUSSBOT: -compels himself to trot. To move. Suddenly rushes forward with force.- HORUSSBOT: -clops right out of the engineering lab. STOMP STOMP STOMP.- JOHN: is this why the power went out???? DIXIE CONCLUSION: :eyes: ROXY: whoops DIRK: Oh shit. There he go. DIXIE CONCLUSION: :heart: :heart: :heart: TEREZI: HORS3 LOOS3 1N 41SL3 TW3LV3 4H4H4H4H4H4 DIRK: -feels the strong urge to... chase... and try to tame him...- DIXIE CONCLUSION: -GALLOPS AFTER THE OTHER HORNSE FRIEND!!!- DIXIE CONCLUSION: -bye bitches- DIRK: And there he go. DIRK: -looks at john.- Anyway, yeah. JOHN: -sighs- i'm going back to bed. JOHN: -WINDY THINGS OUTTA HERE.- TEREZI: =Colors fly everywhere= >|O TEREZI: SUP3R H3LPFUL TH4NKS! EQUIUS: -Appears from the engine room- [[ The aftermath of Horuss's arrival is very obvious. In fact, he's still causing a ruckus in the atrium. ]] EQUIUS: -He was the one that got everything up and running....then decided to make modifications so that power thing wouldn't happen again- ROXY: =she's still here... amoung the wreckage.....= ROXY: so....... EQUIUS: -Sighs a horse sigh- ROXY: mission accomplished? =sheepish thumbs up?= ROXY: =TWO THUMBS EVEN= EQUIUS: D --> I see. Where is he ROXY: he and dixie frolicked out yonder =gestures to the door, voids up some rope= ROXY: should we...? ROXY: ....wrangle? EQUIUS: -Sighs again- EQUIUS: D --> I will handle this. -He pauses though- I would like for you to join, hoovever ROXY: far be it from me 2 turn u down :P =jumps off the desk and makes WAY= EQUIUS: -disappears into the void-

[taciteaneremite]

FINN: -for 48 hours he sits here, doing nothing else but pissing only when he has to and making sure he gets back into his spot within a minute. counting every second, but he has long ago lost count of the 48 hours. he knows it was dark when he came here, darkness he watched turn into light that turned into darkness that turned into light that turned into darkness again. he hasn't slept, hasn't eaten, but as far as he knows, no one has been hurt. no one is within his reach or influence and no one will die as long as he is right here. his mind is a mess of exhausted unfinished thoughts. but at least, he thinks, he abandoned his backpack a bit away, far enough away to grant him a semblance of peace that his habits wouldn't overwhelm and smother anybody that came around. here, he didn't have to think about the worst thoughts in his head that could come true if...there was no logic. nothing made much sense but they are safe. they are safe and he is here and sick to his stomach but it feels okay. it's okay. it's okay.-

DIRK: -48 hours was too long. they should have found him by now, and he's really starting to worry. they got lucky with rammie. if anything happened to finn... he isn't sure how much more luck they had to spare. it's chilling, revisiting this town, this place where so many important changes were made in his life. happy memories. marriage, children. he met finn here, and ever since that moment, he might as well had been his son too.- 

COLT: -dirk wasn't alone in the search, of course. porrim was looking elsewhere. joel ran off to look for him on his own, but colt didn't mention that to their dad. he hoped joining dirk himself might be an ample distraction. but he isn't just here to cover for joel, naturally. he's here to find his best friend, and he's all twisted up inside worrying about what might have happened. what might have driven finn of all people to go someplace without telling anybody. it's not like him, not in the least.- 

COLT: -he glances ahead, watching dirk traverse the forest, calling out finn's name, but he sounds much more distant than he actually is.-

FINN: -he thinks he hears his name and he hears the way it sounds so distant, so familiar. no one would find him here. they can't. they just can't. but he hears his name anyway and closes his eyes just to listen it while leaning his head against a tree. if it's real or not-

COLT: -he exhales, trying his best to get out of his own head, and helps dirk out some more by calling for finn as well, bellowing as loud as his lungs will allow right now.- Finn! 

DIRK: -he presses forward, but pauses when he thinks he sees... someone leaned against a tree. but they're turned away, and in the distance.- Finn? Is that you? -picks up the pace- 

COLT: -startles, following his dad's gaze, and at the mere suggestion that it might be him, he picks up the pace until his long legs are clearing past dirk in a sprint.- Finn??

FINN: -he comes to recognize the voices calling his name, and he opens his tired eyes and turns his head and there's colt running toward him. he could recognize his shadow in a heartbeat. he's confused, though, voice hoarse- colt 

FINN: how did you

COLT: What are you--?? -almost presses for answers first, only because he's frantic, but it only takes a second for him to drop down to his knees next to him with a softer way of imploring him. he just gazes at him with his basset hound eyes, glossy like he's on the verge of tears.- ... Finn... 

DIRK: -catches up with a tiny wheeze. why was he getting old... fuck this tbh.- Finn-- Fuck. 

DIRK: Are you alright?

FINN: -colts eyes watering makes his eyes water due to the fact he has no energy left to spare and feeling anything other than what he has been feeling is just too overwhelming. he glances at dirk- yeah 

FINN: are you guys okay

DIRK: ... -shoulders sag and he sighs.- We're good, Finn. 

DIRK: But we were worried fuckin' sick about you. It ain't my place to grill you, but damn, what were you-- -cut off when he watches colt...- 

COLT: -... who is just going in to hug finn tightly. he's just so relieved he's in one damn piece. he know he's not actually alright, but he's alive, and that means they can help him be alright.-

FINN: -leans his whole weight against colt in that hug- it's okay 

FINN: it's okay-- -the tears start to roll down his face and he chokes on his words a little-

COLT: Finn-- -squeezes him tight, burying his face against his shoulder as his own tears flow.- It's not. It's not ok. 

COLT: You're not ok... -pulls away then to hold finn's face in his hands, to make sure he's looking at him when he says this.- You need to get help. 

DIRK: ... -he's just watching this for now. colt seems to understand the situation better than he does. he already knows how close they are, so he won't interfere just yet. still, it's painful to see finn struggling, and perhaps even more painful to him personally knowing that colt recognizes this so easily.-

FINN: -he feels so tired and heavy and just looking colt in the eyes like this makes him reach an entire new sense of resignation. he manages to nod. something is wrong. something is very wrong- okay

COLT: -draws in to hold finn again... and whether he likes it or not, he's going to be hoisted up and carried by his mountain man of a best friend.- 

DIRK: Oh. 

DIRK: Alright. 

DIRK: ... -clears throat and speaks softly- Let's... head home.

FINN: -here he go. he won't even fight it. take him away, colt.-

[taffetahabiliment-blog]

📱 (citrin)

[idk if youre aw ake lmao i kind of hope not cuzidkjust wan ted to say sor ry for be ing a dick i guessyoure kind of im por tant to megod sor ry for be ing grossa ny wayback to your re gu lar ly sche du led memes

]

[proficientinternuncio-blog]

📱 (xebeck)

[feelin… okay?haven lef room lately.can tell me.woul lie. to see you.]

[twofoldacrimony-blog]

📱

[i kn0w y0u’re d0ing the all nighter thing right n0w but did y0u kn0w that snuggling helps ins0mnia??? true facts i didn’t just make up.als0. after y0u actually d0 get s0me sleep d0 y0u think maybe y0u c0uld sing t0 me s0metime. that’s kind 0f a stupid fucking request h0ly shit. i d0n’t kn0w, i just want t0 hear it 0kay.0h yeah. i taught citrin h0w t0 say “nice meme” t0day. y0u’re fucking welc0me.]