#teamdilf

[wrathbites]

19 - sea change?

Send me a number and I'll write a micro story using the word or phrase

He asked her once, early in their days travelling together, if the sea changes as the land does. If nature has seasons beneath the waves as it does under canopy and shifting skies.

"The sea has no season, only chaos, and change comes to those who answer her call."

Change. Such a simple word for the corruption of some of her people, the twisting of their bodies into something fearsome and monstrous. A cautionary tale to be spoken of only in hushed tones by a fire, windows and doors closed to the howling gales outside.

He's heard the stories, anyone passing through Baldur's Gate has, he's watched the colour drain from many a sailor's face when they speak of the horrors of the deep, impossibly large shadows ripping through ship and person alike, lightning flashing off scales and bone snapping under tooth and claw.

It's a similar violence Levi wields in battle, as quick to draw blood as she is to hurl a spell, a storm unleashed with no care for those caught in its path and it leaves her shaken, sometimes, unsteady as a newborn fawn. Quiet and distant as the death she leaves in her wake.

Halsin does what he can in the aftermath, gathers her into his arms when they rest at camp, tucks her head under his chin and strokes his fingers up and down the length of her spine, ignoring the bunch and release of muscles longing to heed the call, return home, never to be seen again. He winds tendrils of faint green magic around her, coaxing it to seep into her skin and soothe her hurts, anchor her bones.

And when she pulls free of him those nights, hands on his shoulders to lever herself up, he meets that stare gone too dark and dangerous. When she kisses him with lips gone inexplicably cold he doesn't flinch or draw back, threads her hair around his fingers instead and licks into her mouth to sample the sharp sting of her teeth.

She is wild as all seaborn creatures are, destined to leave one day and never return, but until then...

"Stay," his request, and her answer the slide of her body into the space at his side, tucking in close and pressing her hand to his chest, her palm over his heartbeat.

[astorythatwritesitself]

Get Hurt, because I am a fiend for angst!

Fun fact! The original working title is 'I can't let you see me sleeping', but that's overly long so instead I'm just using the title of the song that lyric's from 😂

Anyway! It's the follow up chapter to Survivor's Guilt (/shameless plug), where Hannah visits Adrian!

And proceeds to like - yes there is that Brief Concern on Hannah's part for her kid, but she's mostly there to emphasize Adrian keep her mouth shut & accept everything that's about to come (completely ignoring Adrian's immediate reaction of 'look i dont think im cut out for this and either way this is worth at least an investigation/trial') and either never fuck up that severely again, or have the decency to die, if she does 🙃

Send a WIP title, get a synopsis!

[sparatus]

beach episode? I'm all about beach episodes!

hiiii sorry this is late :3 anyway SAME beach episodes my beloved

wip game

beach episode is somewhat inspired by this ask, just a bit different cast. the embassy powerpile, aka the platonic polypile comprised of embassy power couples sparatus/aediteia and quentius/nautilea, are taking a vacation to the beach, specifically quenty and nauti's beachfront home on parnithas, and maybe it's a little bit by force to get ierian to go somewhere new, because the man needs to relax but my god getting him to do that is like pulling teeth from a varren with rabies. this may or may not be classed as kidnapping actually--

ahem. basically! the fic goes through one day of the quartet on vacation, from lazy morning brunch on the balcony to various activities on the beach to dinner and a bonfire and a lovely evening stroll. the four of them do things in assorted combinations, usually nauti (feral) dragging teia (doesn't get tropical vacations often) along to play in the water or toss a volleyball around or build sandcastles while the boys (lazy) chillax and sunbathe and investigate the tide pools. at some point the ladies come back to flop down and everyone hangs out with alcohol and enjoys the sunset. tippi and ierian probably spend some time fishing.

it's mostly a fluff piece, really, with an overall plot of getting ierian, who is generally very tightly-wound, to relax and just enjoy the moment instead of fussing about work or family or anything. his omni-tool was confiscated as soon as they landed on parnithas, put in a little lockbox, and tucked away somewhere he couldn't see, and he keeps trying to make excuses to go looking for it, but, well, they hid the key, and all three of his companions have a vested interest in not letting him get to it. bullying him into forgetting about it and coming outside to play and relax is the entire plot. i need some self-indulgent beach episode bullshit sometimes that's it that's my excuse

also gratuitous thirst content, obviously, what kind of charlatan do you take me for

[jupiterdescendingg]

𝒯𝑒𝒶𝓂 𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓇𝓁𝒾𝑒

@painted-thumbs

[emmg]

What's Good in the Fanfic Hood: DA Edition

(i also have a bg3 version coming up)

For no particular reason, and in no particular order, here's some good soup I need to share with the universe (aka tumblr). Very, very good fanfics right here

the interlude by @thessaralka >>GOOD SMUTTY SOLAVELLAN SMUT with a side of angst. Fade tongue, elf dick as an anxiety cure (her words not mine), just beautifully written shameless smut for the egg aficionados. And I'm not just saying this because I strong-armed her into writing this lol

A Breach of Decorum & Spill the Tea by kdriegantir >>> The sweetest Emmrook lil one shots. I was kicking my legs, twirling my hair, giggling like a school girl. Sooooooo cute

Flower in a Cage by @teamdilf >>> If you like some plot with your angst, this is it. I had soooo much fun reading this leading up to Veilguard. This is for my Elgar'nan girlies, even if technically he's not shipped with anyone here. But damn what a charming villain. I mean, we know now he's a massive bitch with an anger issue (and the bedroom-iest voice I've ever heard, like hot shit, ask me to sit on your lap daddy) but, eh, who cares, the fic is great lol

Rook, No. also by @teamdilf >>> I just caught up on this and it's soooo fun. Just Rook being a menace to society (in this case Solas is society.) The roommate scenario Solas never asked for while he cries internally about his wife

The whole Countdown to Veilguard series of drabbles by whoframedjessicarabbit >>> Just lovely, smutty, or not, Emmrook drabbles. Soooo fun to read

Suture by @heylittleriotact >>> ok so I JUST finished reading this, like maybe 10 minutes ago, and I have THOUGHTS. Because CUTE, so CUTE, how CUTE. Emmrook a la two awkward nerds. I'm waiting for my headache to pass to write a more coherant comment but in the meantime, big reccomend

I couldn't find some folks on tumblr, so just let me know and I'll tag you if you have an account

Thanks for tuning in, ta-ta

[sporeservant]

Get to know your Tav!

(Ask game format available here!)

Thanks for the patience of everyone who’s been waiting on this questionnaire. Below are some “get to know you” questions about the current or favorite Tav of anyone that would like to participate. Feel free to skip any questions that don’t strike your fancy or apply to your character by marking them with an “X”.

I can’t wait to get to know your characters!

Introduce your Tav (name, race/class, pronouns):

What is your Tav’s…

favorite weapon:

style of combat:

most prized possession:

deepest desire:

guilty pleasure:

best-kept secret:

greatest strength:

fatal flaw:

favorite smell:

favorite spell or cantrip:

pet peeve:

bad habit:

hidden talent:

leisure activity:

favorite drink:

comfort food:

favorite person:

favored display of affection (platonic and/or romantic):

fondest childhood memory:

Is there anything else you'd like to share? (feel free to include art or a screenshot of your Tav if available!)

Thanks for your participation, a dark urge questionnaire is coming soon!

Tagging:

@queenjayrogue , @owmyeyeballs , @teamdilf , @rapture29 ,

@astraphone , @evye , @kaldurcalm , @tavsboots , @parricidalis ,

@aroace-nut-case , @knightingale-errant , @firetear11 , @n0vab1rn

& anyone else that would like to participate!

Text divider credit @saradika

[kalmiaphlox]

Completed Fic Recs

I'm currently stuck in some reading burnout (thats what I get for overconsuming lol) but I wanted to shout out some fics that I really, really love that are completed (I'm not counting whether or not there are sequels/series, but some of these do have sequels and should be checked out as well!)

All Astarion fics because that is all I read. Sorry, not sorryyyyy

The Vampire Ascendant's Wife by @ofsilentthings - First ever Astarion fic (and fanfiction in general) I ever read and I was hooked immediately. You follow Rickard Musgrove, a young accountant, thrust into the world of the Vampire Ascendant Astarion. @ofsilentthings writes in a way that is so foreboding and haunting, I have never read anything like it and it's truly one of my favorites!

Feeding Alligators by @atsadi-shenanigans - I mostly started reading this because I am obsessed with alligators/crocodiles so the title just hooked me, but I stayed for nasty bitch Astarion and claw-her-way-through-literally-anything Eleanor. This fic is hilarious, traumatic, and everything in between. The writing is something so special, and you feel Eleanor's incredulity at her situation. One of those fics you wish you could erase from your brain to experience reading it again.

Lost Souls Like Us by @teamdilf - I just love Petra and Astarion's relationship. They're both navigating loss and hardship, they both make dumb decisions and WHY WONT YOU JUST KISS ALREADY?? Petra is so realistic, and her grief over losing Karlach tugs at your heartstrings. Also any dragon heritage is a plus in my book!

Thicker Than Water by @busy-baker - Dadstarion? Post-game? Astarion's original family? Why yes, this does have everything. This fic is filled with such amazing familial love and fluff, it kinda makes your teeth hurt sometimes. There are twists and turns that I won't spoil, but @busy-baker has done an amazing job of crafting characters you love to love and others you would wish anything to punch in the face.

in the stars (and six-feet's never felt so far)  by dollyish (if they are on tumblr, please lmk so I can link plz!) - uhm, holy shit this fic is devastating. I felt the heartbreak the entire time (and I am really not someone who gets particularly choked up while reading), but this fic tore me apart from start to finish. Read it! Especially if you are in the mood for a good cry!

[busy-baker]

WIP Wednesday

Thank you to @emmy-dekarios-bg3 for tagging me!

Chapter 11 of Roasted, folks…

Astarion stopped as he heard his name. He pinned himself against the wall, back straight and arms to his sides. He concentrated as best he could on the conversation.

“What if he’s never ready to say it?” Gale asked.

“Say what, dear?” Astarion could hear Morena moving around as she spoke.

“That he loves me. Are you even listening, mother?”

Astarion was struck by the statement. He hadn’t explicitly said the words “I love you”, but he thought Gale was picking up hints. He was just unsure if he could actually utter the words, afraid the relationship may crumble as soon as he did.

“Oh, pish posh. There’s no need to send yourself into a tizzy. Anyone with eyes can see that man loves you. He looks at you as if you could pluck the stars from the heavens for him.”

“And I would, if only for him to gaze upon them for a second.”

Tagging: @kalmiaphlox @davenswitcher @pinkberrytea @ladyduellist @teamdilf @nerdallwritey

[outpost51]

Character Cuddle Scale

See? See I get to them eventually!! Tagged by @ceph-the-ghost-writer over here!

How-to: Rate your OCs based on how they handle cuddling/being cuddled.

I’m just grabbing ten, otherwise we’d be here all gd day 🫠 Naturally, we’re keeping it in the Arsonist Chronicles universe lest I lose focus on the second day of camp, and only the ones that are well known-ish? I’m prooooobably not doing this right. Based on a scale of 0 (cuddly as a cactus) to 10 (could be paid to cuddle professionally):

Zadimus: solid 8/10, he’s big and warm and smells like temple smoke and his wings are like a big blanket, the only problem is he’s. Him. Loses points for smug bastardness and the [insert phallic object] in his pocket that’s very happy to see you

Dillon: either 9/10 or -9000/10 depending on her mood. She’s small and huggable like a little teddy bear when she’s in the mood for it but Watch Out

Daisy: 10/10, she’s a little cold to the touch but she warms up nice and I think if you told her she could get paid to snuggle all day… well, she’d keep the dance studio but definitely do that in her off hours.

Cheryl: 8/10 +/- 2 points depending on if the werewolf thing is a perk for you or not. Like come on, that’s free mom hugs right there and she can become big ouppy

Moira: 6/10 tig ol bitties, smells nice, will be a menace though. Hates holding still for too long so unless she’s got something to occupy herself, you’re getting poked, prodded, noogied, wet-willied, and your butt’s getting jiggled at least once

Delilah: 1000/10, buddy what do you think she did before she fell, taxes? Hell no babey this cherub is soft and snuggly and smells like strawberries and cream

Jasper: -1000/10 prickly bastard fallen angel. Grompy. No touch, he contains many knives and also swords. And a crossbow on Tuesdays. Unless you’re Delilah.

Life: 10/10, yes cuddle mama life. Warm and made for huggin and snuggin

Death: 2/10, mostly because she stays far far far away from the living unless someone’s grief calls her loud enough. She’s still not very touchy, but for her wife? She accepts the snugs.

The Deep: 3/10. Soggy smarmy but not. Bad-bad. Just a menace. Bites. Might steal your wallet. Very touch starved. Plays with his food. Also comes with a risk of infecting yourself with Rot. Doesn’t happen all the time but is it worth it? You decide.

Tagging: @sparatus @thetrashbagswasteland @daisywalletchains @glitchinginthegarden @a-driftamongopenstars @writernopal @teamdilf @hornetofhallownest @aceouttatime and anyone who hasn’t done this yet?? Or has more characters to share??

[fiendsandfangs]

The 2024 Fiends & Fangs Fanwork Exchange blessed us with a trove of monster fanworks. Here's a fic we think you'll love. 💕

Degrees of Separation

by @teamdilf ※ Ao3: Missjlh

Mass Effect, Mass Effect: Andromeda ※ Hannah Shepard/Castis Vakarian ※ (2,715 words) ※ Teen

Summary:

Castis has started online dating and has a first date with an Alliance veteran. Only, it turns out there are far fewer degrees of separation than he’d initially assumed.

✨ Check out this work on Ao3! ✨

[jazzajazzjazz]

Dreamy domestic Astarion x Tav (the beautiful Petra!) commission for @teamdilf --thank you so much for your support <3

----- Commissions are currently my only source of income--do get in touch if you're interested! Email in pinned post ♥

[writernopal]

Some Lines

Combining a few tag games here to share a few lines of some stuff I've written lately because, as always, I am perpetually behind on tags T_T

Thanks to @teamdilf (here), @tabswrites (here), @noblebs (here), @mysticstarlightduck (here), @mister-writes (here), and

@cosmiccoincidence (here)!

Tagging (gently): @acertainmoshke @sarahlizziewrites @crowandmoonwriting and @sugar-phoenix !

cw: none, just under a cut bc its long-ish

It was strange to imagine. How could a vessel, this mighty invention of man crafted for the sole purpose of travel not move? Indeed it seemed impossible. But what good were wide sails and tall masts without that most crucial agent of change? None at all. And so the proud construction became at once butchery and butcher, each part of her now being keenly inspected by shifty eyes, wondering what portion of her would be theirs. What of that body might sustain them while she, the craft, honed her knife eagerly eyeing the men in much the same way. Ship and crew were not symbiotic then, but parasitic, each anticipating the elixir of life from the other. Could doldrums be a landed affair too? I found myself scratching at the thought incessantly, no matter how occupied I kept my hands. Even now, with the most treasured needles Axtapor had sculpted for me, yes, even with these in my grasp, I could not will my fingers to be busy knots and loops. All they wanted was to break that question open and search for the truth within its bowels. Which of us was the vessel and which the crew? When would we find wind again? When would the food run out?  When would we have to make a choice that there was no coming back from? I trembled. That choice had a name, a face, a voice. I heard it day and night even when the choice was not before me asking if I wanted to make it. Asking if I wanted to know. To face it felt akin to lettering my name in the ship’s deck log, on the page no captain ever wished to use. Like every entry, it would be made in ink, but beside it would be a brief eulogy for why my name had been signed there. Heartbreak, it might say. Any who might read it later, with the benefit of hindsight and free of choice’s allure, would surely wonder if I couldn’t hang on just a little longer. Go just that much farther. Push it down as I always had. But deck logs were facts, not accounts of witness or studies of life, and so the question would remain unanswered long after the wind came back and decisions were easy.

AASOAF 3 Taglist: @outpost51 @thelivingdeceased @faelanvance @captain-kraken @illjustpretend

@elshells @full-on-sam @the-mindless @zestymimblo @tabswrites

@void-botanist

Join/leave the taglist using this Google Form.

[sparatus]

hunt: Who or what is your OC hunted by? A person, a feeling, a past mistake? Is your OC able to let their guard down, or are they constantly alert?

For Calvetorin?

not-so-nice oc asks

hhhhh callie baby :puddl:

when she was 16 and in mandatory service, a mission cal was on went horribly wrong, and she (and her brother verres, whose unit was also in the same place) ended up needing to go home on psychiatric leave. verres recovered a little better than she did, able to return to active duty and even ended up becoming a lifer, but cal was so shaken by what happened that she was placed on the noncombatant route early and exempt from front line service for the rest of the career. given that she's much smaller and more fragile than her brothers and spent the first few years of her life in and out of the hospital, she'd wanted very badly to prove she could keep up with every other turian, and felt deeply ashamed that she couldn't. her family tried to reassure her it was fine, none of them were judging her, but it was a standard she'd held herself to, and was very upset she couldn't meet it. she still beats herself up about it from time to time, especially after she switched her life plan again during medical school (switching from neonatal to general pediatrics) when she couldn't bear the emotional strain.

[omniblades-and-stars]

OC SMASH OR PASS

Tagged by @teamdilf thanks!

Rules: pretty self explanatory. include physical descriptions or pics, and propaganda. the “other” label can be used for “sexuality misalignment” (ie: oc is femme and you’re gay, vice versa or you aren’t into smashing but a specific thing you wanna do with them like perhaps hug or study them under a microscope idc).

Dr. Louise "Lou" Miller

QUICK FACTS

5'3.5" (that half inch is very important) tall and just generally a small whisp of a thing.

Age: 38

Gender: Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Mega Bisexual? Whatever bisexuality is called when it also includes aliens.

PROS

Cute accent! Tennessee born and raised and damn proud of it.

Adventurous. Adventurous in life and love, you'll never be bored with Lou around.

Lou is loyal and will put herself at great risk to her own safety and life to get you out of trouble. (Now, granted she may or may not have gotten you into that trouble in the first place.)

She loves cooking! Cooking is an important way that she shows affection (or just shows off honestly).

She is confident in her own accomplishments. She does freelance tech engineering work and also makes her own little gadgets to aid in her bounty hunting.

Despite being a bit wild, she's very neat. You'll never have to worry about cleaning up after her.

She has a friend for that. And that. She knows so many people who owe her favors. Need a patio built, she's got someone on speed dial. She's got more than one freelance merc wrapped around her little finger. Infer from that what you will.

*ahem*she'sflexible*ahem*

CONS

You are going to get into trouble when she's around. Trouble magnet. No sense of self-preservation.

Not the kind of doctor that can help you when she gets you into trouble.

Uses her bubbly and enthusiastic demeanor to hide a deep, deep sadness.

Messy, messy prior relationships and a tendency to latch onto anyone who's nice to her even if they don't stay nice to her. You may be subjected to an embarrassing encounter with an ex.

Poor decision making when she's stressed out. Likes to cause problems.

She has a dangerous job! She is frequently in mortal peril. This may be upsetting to you.

Confusing and inconsistent moral compass sometimes.

Neat freak that flips around to a bit of a pathology when she feels like things are out of control again. Everything goes in it's place right down to the lines she painted on her workbenches, the sections she sewed into her go-bag, the labels she put in her fridge. She tries really hard not to make a big deal out of it when she's sharing a space, but she is only human.

And um I'll tag: @commander-krios, @who-is-riley, and @daggertongue why not? No pressure though. I'm just out here spreading the good word of Louise Miller.

[diaphanouso]

✨Spec Reqs 2024 - Gifts & Recs!✨

This was my third year participating in the Spectre Requisitions Rare Pair Exchange (@spectre-requisitions-exchange) and let me tell you, the creators COOKED 🔥 These fanworks have been sustaining me all week. Do yourself a solid and check out this year's full collection of amazing fics and fanart here, and don't forget to show these works some well-deserved love with some kudos/comments!

Here are my recs so far—I'll add to this list as I progress through the collection! Creators are still anonymous until Tuesday, April 9, at which point I'll update this post with the creators' Ao3 handles.

Works listed below are fics unless otherwise noted. And lastly: as always, mind the tags!

❤️ My Gifts ❤️

This year I was blessed with two amazing gift fics:

A Gaping Wound to the Heart | Castis Vakarian/Adrien Victus | Mature | by @teamdilf

Castis and Adrien finding comfort in each other lights up my soul, and this fic DELIVERS. The angst 🤌 The care 🔥 PERFECTION. chef's kiss

a still, small voice | Fshep/Wrex | Explicit | by calypsid

An absolute gem with hot as fuck smut, incredible prose, and a Shepard grappling with the unsettling experience of inhabiting her new body 🤌 Wrex is there to help (and does he ever) 🥵

🔥 My Recs 🔥

Byte Me | Fshep/Legion | Explicit | by @kalliesa

Reach and Fucking Flexibility | James/Garrus | Explicit | by @ginbiscuit

God is a Verb | Mshep/Jack, Mshep/Kaidan, Implied Jack/Kaidan | Mature | by @krahka

A Deal is a Deal | Fshep/Shadow Broker | Explicit (cw: dubcon) | by @vorchagirl

Be Gentle (Artwork) | Thane/NBShep | Explicit by @finchmarie

comm chats and more | Diana Allers/Samantha Traynor | Gen | by @hazelestelle

Mourning what we could be | Fshep & Fshep Clone | Gen | by @depressed-sock

[davenswitcher]

OC Deep Dive

Thanks for the tag @teamdilf @busy-baker! Going to do this for Estellé and Ravne as I was tagged twice :D

Estellé

What common/uncommon fear do they have?

Estellé's fear is losing the ones she loves the most. And fears Brioche getting run over by a car some day.

Do they have any pet peeves?

People not listening to her and pretending she's not in the room.

What are 3 items you can find in their bedroom?

Astarion's rings, music magazine, philosophy book

What do they notice first in a person?

Their aura. Confidence and how they present themselves.

On a scale from 1-10, how high is their pain tolerance?

2. She is a wuss and hates, absolutely hates pain.

Do they go into fight or flight mode when under pressure?

It depends on the situation. It's either the third option: freeze. Or stay calm and collected (fight mode)

Do they come from a big family/are they a family person?

She's an elf. Therefore, only child. She's also not that fond of kids, and thanks corellon daily for being technically infertile.

What animal represents them best?

A dog. She loves dogs and is just as loyal and faithful.

What is a smell they dislike?

Gale's sweat mixed with his perfume. When she hung out with Astarion after a concert his friends and bandmates were with him and let's just say she urged all of them to shower asap.

Have they broken any bones?

Once she fell off a tree and broke her ankle. It may or may not have been on purpose to avoid dancing with the neighbours kid.

How would a stranger likely describe them?

arrogant but pretty.

Are they a night owl, or morning bird?

Neither? She only needs to trance 4h so she has 20h left of the day.

What’s a flavor they hate and a flavor they love?

Hate: Anything too sweet, asparagus, fat/butter. Loves: milk chocolate, strawberries, whatever Janis (Astarion's mom) puts in the ramen

Do they have any hobbies?

Anything philosophy, teasing Astarion, hanging out with him and his friends

Boom, surprise birthday party! How do they react to surprise?

Storm out. She hates surprises like this.

Do they like to wear jewellery?

Occasionally, but not too much. Ear cuffs and rings are her choice.

Do they have neat or messy handwriting?

In-between messy and neat but leaning more into messy.

What are the two emotions they feel the most?

content and love (when Astarion is around)

Do they have a favourite fabric?

not really. anything that doesn't scratch

What kind of accent do they have?

Mix between Irish and posh British English.

Tagging: @cinnamontails-ff @oonalovesastarionssimpleplan @larvasmoon