#tbh shes literally the most adorable how did he think he ever stood a chance

[atypicalacademic]

WIP Someday

@wild-houseplant thank you for the Tag, here's a bit from the next installment of Tia's chronology aka someone's gonna get the Antivan Boots-

She was flushed from the haste, hauling her satchel to his side with that beaming, infectious smile of hers. Against his own will, Zevran felt it warm him twice over, spilling into the furtive, darkened corners of his suspicion, over every edge of every trepidation, easily, too easily, as she overturned its contents with an unholy clatter, twisting her sweaty ponytail back up from the nape of her neck.

“Where-” He paused, taking stock of her spoils. A pastel-colored paperback, a golden bracelet, a polished-smooth wishbone, a stone-carved totem, a thimble of what smelt strongly of ale, a pair of satin socks, a pendant, cast in bronze and carrying a simple, delicate watercolor within. “Have you been shopping, Warden?”

Tatiana laughed, covering her mouth with the back of her palm, and winked. “You could say that.”

“My, my,” Zevran sucked in air through his teeth. “The grey warden, a criminal?”

“Well, it’s more pleasant than looting dead bodies, and-” She sat back on her knees, stars in her brown eyes. “Couldry says I’m a natural.”

He would, wouldn’t he, to someone who could bend the wind to her will, pick pockets without lifting a finger?

The paperback, then, was for Wynne, who hadn’t yet put down the last book she’d managed to get her hands upon. The bracelets, twined so and bejewelled with a demon’s head- for Morrigan. Zevran picked up the pendant turning it’s cool weight between his fingers so he could force himself to look away from her. “And this is-”

“For Sten!” She said brightly. “I know he’s fond of landscapes. And he’s so far from home, the poor dear.”

Tagging anyone who would 😌

[captnjacksparrow]

Hello!! Well this came to my mind and would be interesting to put into words.

Something that her fans were right is that she hadn't to accept Rock Lee's confession and love. For them a No was No, which is hilarious becase their princess didnt do this with sasuke lol but anyway. After Lee saves Sakura in Death Forest, she changes her attitude towards him and started to be nice , she even defends him when Naruto said something aboout bushy-eyebrows. Even more, i dont actually remember scenes where she is rude against him after that incident in the forest. She tried to encouraged him and most of the time she was "nice" with Lee. In the Hospital in part 1 she was going to visit Sasuke and she also thought of Lee, so she gifted him some flowers too.

-All of this I speak from the anime canon, manga i dont remember tbh. Also in movies I remember her being nice with Lee too- So, what's my point and question? Why is she so bitchy towards Naruto? While she is nice -or try to- with Lee (which he fucking deserves this treatment of course) , why she is still so ungraceful towards Naruto? Naruto saved her much more times than Lee, but still she can be nice with him. I get that when you are confident with someone, you tend to "insult" more lets say. But i get that feel when naruto is around of shikamaru or the other guys. We know how he and Sasuke treat each other ♥ But still, i dont get this with Sakura. Even more, did she ever defend Naruto? From other people I mean. If she could change her attitude for Lee, being almost a good friend.

I always think about this @melody-of-lost-souls 🤔🤔🤔.... Why is she bitchy towards Naruto alone??

There is this hard fact that every author with just half a braincell knows, that is, 'IF YOU WANT A CHARACTER TO BE LIKEABLE, MAKE IT BEHAVE NICER TOWARDS THE MAIN CHARACTER'.

To be honest, I started to like Sasuke because of that very fact 'He was extremely nice towards Naruto in his own way' and later I started to adore him because of his own backstory. But the first spark was because of Episode 3, Orphan insult scene.

It seems Kishi never had that intention to make Sakura be an honest friend with Naruto even in The Last movie. So, ummm.... Yup.

Like you said, Sakura changed her attitude towards Lee and she encouraged him when he was wounded after fighting Gaara. But anyways, she again went onto being a bitch in the Kage Summit Arc, by leaving Lee on the road without any care!!! So... That's what you can expect from her🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ But that's not the point of this post. Is it??

Point to be noted : Sasuke and Naruto insulting each other shows their comfort level with each other. Sakura harassing Naruto is not the same thing. Never.

I think she spoke for Naruto before Sasuke twice. One, In the forest of the Death. Two, Under the Bridge. But it doesn't matter.

She should've defended Naruto from Sasuke's attacks in Orochimaru hideout like Sai.

She should've worried about Naruto's wounds after Naruto came back like an Egyptian Mummy from fighting in VoTE in part 1. Instead she was worried about Sasuke alone.

She should've fought Sasori for Naruto's safety sake instead of getting information about Sasuke.

She should’ve stayed with Naruto when he went with Karui to deal with Sasuke’s Akatsuki activities. 

She should've stood up for Naruto in her final confession like 'Sasuke-kun, if you touch Naruto, I'll have to kill you eventhough I love you'... Yeah, she wouldn't stand a chance against Sasuke. But her character would've shined a lot.

So, Nope. She defending Naruto couple of times but letting him down countless other times doesn't matter.

WHY SAKURA TREATS NARUTO BADLY ?

After thinking about all the possibilities,

SOCIAL STATUS OF NARUTO

Sakura is the reflection of the Villagers' mindset. That is, The object of Hatred who should be treated like pest.

She definitely gave me that vibe in Episode 3. She literally treated him like a plague and I wanted to slap her so hard ever since. But even after the Pain Arc, I mean after Naruto became a Hero by making peace with Nagato, she still behaved like a Worst Bitch.

If she truly represents the social dynamics of the Villagers, she should have become a good friend like Shikamaru or Neji long back. But she didn’t.

So, we can safely eliminate this possibility.

SAKURA THINKS NARUTO IS 'THIRDWHEELING'

Well, This is from Chapter 3. So, I think whenever Sakura makes a move on Sasuke, Naruto accidentally comes in between her one-sided ‘duck dreams’ and spoil her party. It seems this has been going on for a long time. So, she just hates him for that. 

I found this ‘coming between’ thing twice in part 1. The first time was when Naruto stole the ‘First Kiss’ of Sasuke.

Second time was when Naruto was about to fight Gaara.

Here, Sakura was fretting over Sasuke’s cursed Seal and when Naruto asked her a question, she responded with a ‘Devil Face’. I mean is there any need to get angry at this time? There’s a monster standing before them and all she worries about is her poor ‘Sasuke-Kun’ and not even bothered about her surroundings, because Naruto will do the dirty job. All she can do is touch and worry about Sasuke. 

Well, In reality she is the one coming between them and she never realized that. What a self-absorbed Trash!!!

SAKURA IS JEALOUS

Naruto receives something from Sasuke that she never got from him, not until the very end and even today. That is, Attention. 

I noticed this in the Manga. Surprisingly, I guess none of the SNS bloggers brought this very cute panel up for discussion. It’s not in the Anime though!! 

This is from Chapter 3 page 6. (Geez!!!! Chapter 3 is a Gold Mine for SNS)

As you see Sakura was watching Sasuke up close like a Fruit Cake. It seems, Sasuke doesn’t give 2 fucks about her or anyone!!!

Now Let’s go back to Page 5 and see what happened earlier.

Naruto has been intensely throwing knives from his eyes. And you know what!!! Sasuke noticed it and asked him ‘What?’. To which Naruto asks, ‘What do you mean what?’. LOLLLLLL.

This is their First official conversation in the Manga.😍😍😍😍😍

Sakura looking at him with love doesn’t get any reaction and Naruto’s angry stare get his attention. Well, this is not an one time occurrence!!

In the Same chapter, it occurred again

This panel screams, ‘Why pay attention to Naruto, when he is not here?’. Kishi established this dynamics in freaking Chapter 3 and it never changed towards the end. LOLLL.

Even during Chakra Training, Sakura climbed the tree very easily in the hopes that Sasuke would appreciate her or notice her with admiration. But he was never bothered about her achievements even by a bit, but he paid attention to Naruto when he found out he was slowly catching up to him🤭🤭🤭.

I always find this scene very funny and cute because just like before, Naruto throws Daggers at him visually and Sasuke was like, ‘What did I do this time?’. 😍😍😍

And this is after getting the pass to participate in Chunin Exams

Well, I don’t have to add the scenes from Orochimaru Hideout, Bridge scene and War Arc, Do I?

And the best part is Sakura knew that Naruto gets his attention. So, her jealousy is probably the reason for her to treat him so badly. Just like how she treats Ino. Since Naruto plays dunce in front of her, she takes advantage of it and used him like a Tooth Brush.

This is also one of the reason for her to treat him badly.

Because Lee never came in between Sakura and Sasuke. It was Naruto, the whole time. And that's why she was like a bitch to Naruto.

Kishimoto in his own words,

I mean, Come On!!!, Sakura is nothing compared to Naruto's power level, strength or jutsu varieties to consider him as a rival in these departments. Still she is considering Naruto as her rival.

In what????

The only thing that connects them is their obsession towards Sasuke's Acknowledgement. And Kishi himself is hinting at a love triangle with Sasuke as the central figure.

Does it means Naruto also loves Sasuke and Sakura was jealous of it???🤔🤔🤔🤭🤭🤭🤭.

Well, that makes more sense. 😂😂😂. Because I can think of no other reason for her to be a bitch towards Naruto.

Curse You, Kishimoto!!!!!!

[redxblueihateloveyou]

i'm curious, what are your top 10 favorite rinharu moments in high speed and high speed 2?? i love the books. i don't understand why people say is impossible to ship rinharu if you read them...

Lmao who are those “people”? As in multiple? And are they from Mars? I do not get this. You cannot be serious. You probably meant “impossible not to ship”?

I don’t know about top ten, I love all of their interractions tbh, they just remind me of my fav type of romance in general. I know what are my top 5 I think, but after that I love everything, so it’s hard to rate.

1. My absolutely favorite moment will forever be the one, where Rin describes the way he sees Haru in the water, I’m seriously forever in awe, because, I’ve read a lot of books, and like... even period dramas got nothing on Rin Matsuoka, when he describes the love of his life. I mean, seriously, find yourself a person who sees you the way Rin sees Haru lol

Rin felt like he was touched by the light, that surrounded him with warmth. He turned around to see Haruka, who was glowing. Shining. Haruka was shining with every strong and confident stroke that he made. The outstanding energy, emitted from him, surrounded Haruka with the dazzling light and Rin froze, unable to look away. Rin’s heart was beating so hard in his chest, that he forgot how to breathe. Haruka stole his heart. And the further away he got from him, the more distance grew between them, the more uneasy Rin felt, like he was losing the control over his emotions. He was possesed by Haruka’s shining. His strokes looked as if he was hugging the water, his leg movements were so effortless and so elegant, as if water herself was moving him to the finish line. But in all these deceptively smooth and unhurried motions were so much strength and power and such incredible speed, that all his opponents didn’t stand a chance. His swimming was that transcendent reality. He was like a bird dancing in the sky with its wings spread wide.”

Dude... I’m like... still speechless. I mean, and not just this, but everytime Rin talks about Haru, even when he jokes about his stupid habbits, you still feel that he finds him so beautiful, inside and outside, that it just makes my heart melt. 

2. When Aki tells Rin that if you put him and Haru together, you get a perfection. 

“That guy has no sense of humor. He should learn by watching me, don't you think?" Rin joked lightly.

Aki laughed a bit at his words. "It's true. Add the two of you together and divide by two, and it would be perfect."

But I mainly love that moment, because like... Aki starts telling him, that Haru is not what he's pretending to be (like for some idiots in the fandom who call him selfish, that was the explanation for them xD) and how everyone always want something from him, and he never asks for anything in return and doesn’t have anyone to lean on (yup that’s what I said all along, too, with Makoto’s dumb behavior in difficult situations, he’s on his own there lmao). And she waits for Rin to deny it or like be surprised, but it turned out that that’s exactly how Rin sees him and that he cracked him from the very beginning. BTW, here’s your addition to the ask about Rin loving Haru for who he is and seeing him for who he is. I’m just in love with that moment, because I’m happy that he just... not only he knows him, but bc he’s not one of those many idiots who just don’t get it.

"Nanase-kun seems like he can do anything all by himself, doesn't he? He's good at studying and sports and even art. He really can do anything, right? That's why everyone relies on him, but it would really be something for Nanase-kun to rely on anyone, wouldn't it?"

Rin certainly thought this was true. He had only just transferred, but the image that Rin had of Haruka was exactly that. But even if Haruka didn't have the will to go out and get involved with other people on his own, it wasn't like he was completely isolated. On the contrary, he was considered the most reliable person in their class, and when people relied on him, he always did his best to meet their expectations. This was the strange balance that people around Haruka had to maintain.

3. The one when Haru calls Rin by his name for the first time. And I honestly for some reason didn’t even realize that this moment was in the anime until my 3rd rewatch (lol), but, man, little Rin’s reaction is the most adorable ever. I cry.

4. When Gou meets Haru for the first time and immediately goes “ah so you’re Haruka Nanase, the one, who my brother talks about 24/7...‘Nanase is so cool, Nananse is so fast!’” and Rin just goes red lmfaaaaaooooo.

5. When Haru says that he feels the fever running through his body each time he just sees Rin, but he doesn’t understand what it means... ahem.... OH WELL

6. When Rin tells them he’s leaving and Haru gets absolutely furious and calls him a selfish jerk, but then he feels his legs giving out and he thinks that he needs to be in the water, but then he realizes, that for the first time in his life it won’t save him and he’s so lost and fucking crushed. "you can’t just mess up my whole life and leave me like that” and “this can’t be true, I can’t be this weak.” aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa fucking hellish angst... that mix of emotions was seriously hideous, at first he was so confused and in denial, he couldn’t even think, he literally went “who is leaving?” and then it just all blew up. Poor baby.

7. Just all the little moments, when Rin notices everything Haru does and falls in love a bit more each time. Like when Haru slowed down, when he saw that Nagisa is having troubles of keeping up with him.

Nagisa was earnestly trying to keep up with Haruka. If he kept up that pace, he wouldn't be able to run next to Haruka for the whole trip. That was how it had been yesterday. Nagisa's breath was coming short, and when Haruka saw him slow down a pace, he lightly turned his eyes downward. I guess that's as far as he goes.

A sigh mixed with Haruka's long breaths. Then, by just a tiny increment, Haruka let his pace slacken.

"Oh?" Rin said quietly. Haruka could almost hear him saying "You're so nice, Nanase," and he tsked inwardly. Nagisa caught up to him, smiling as if it hurt a bit. It looked like he'd lost the energy to keep talking.

Just cute, and they watched each other all the time, it’d be a bitch to count each one, but god, all of them were cute.

8. All the moments of Haru pulling Rin’s pigtails... hilarious, especially the RinRin one, but the funniest and my favorite was when Nagisa turned to Haru to ask him for a permision to call Rin Rin-Rin, like... all the rights to Rin belong to Haru and vice versa lmao I agree. “I’ll allow it” lolz shut it, Haru.

9. This moment: “Something happened inside of him that made Haruka incredibly angry, he was so pissed, that he didn’t even want to swim anymore. To think that someone like Rin could make him feel such powerful swirl of emotions and make him such a mess... he felt disgusted with himself.” Yeah, Haru, love is dat bitch when you’re 13 lol

10. The one where Haru whispers “sorry for making you feel that way” to Rin? The one where Rin’s grandma doesn’t want to go to see the relay, but then she suddenly does, when she finds out that her grandson’s future husband is in it? The “he at that moment realized that the only thing Rin was concerned about was Haruka” one? I don’t fucking know, you pick haha ANY MOMENT, ALL THE MOMENTS XD

______

BUT in all seriousness, I do not get how you can love Makoharu after the novels. Like do people just ignore these moments:

“Haru waved Makoto off like an annoying fly”, “feeling annoyed by his obnoxious care, Haruka went right past him”, “feeling like Makoto’s smile could turn into tears any second now, Haru turned away and went to the showers” (fuck this shit I’m out lmao), “complitely ignoring him, Haru kept walking”.

??????? is this... does anyone find this amazing??????!!!!!!!!!!!

Or when Haru was literally fucking losing it, cause Makoto just repeated everything after him and how he just lost all the respect in that moment.

“I feel like I should also get into running.” Makoto said it as it was a joke, but Haru knew for sure that it wasn’t. More than that, he knew, that Makoto was going to ask him that ever since the moment he found out that Haru was running this morning. Haruka fel annoyed, because he couldn’t find the excuse to refuse him.

Or this moment:

“Makoto was late and Haruka didn’t have any reasons to wait for him. Makoto can catch up with him on the way, they’ll meet at the swimming club either way. For both of them it’ll be better, if Haru went by himself, than stood there and waited Makoto, slowly losing his temper.”

“Haruka felt uncomfortable, cause Makoto looked at him, as if was a weak”

Or this:

"Did you know I was going to come out here?" Even though he knew it was impossible, Makoto couldn't stop himself from asking.

"Nope."

"Then, why…" are you standing in a place like this?

"Watching the sunset."

and I can go on and on and on

and the fishies... oh my fucking god, the fishies

***

I’m just saying, all these moments are not even funny. My point in all this, that like no matter how much Haru loves Makoto as a friend... or got used to him is what I personally think, I don’t think he’s ever gonna idk how to say this... respect him as a human being? admire him? And this whole situation... I just can’t appreciate such kind of relationships even in a friends way. 

1stly because Makoto’s behavior in general makes me have war flashbacks to some of my real life experiences (and yeah, I confess, it affected me and that’s why I don’t like his character a lot; because I don’t think many people know what it’s like to deal with these kind of people in general). 2ndly, cause Makoto fans keep trashing Haru and many call him selfish bc of the way he treats him, but what they don’t understand is that if it wasn’t for Haru being this harsh, Makoto would literally became even doormat-y than he is now (yes, it’s possible lmao). 

P.S. my favorite in the novels tbh is all the Haru “I’m surrounded by idiots” moments, like when they started to dig the frozen soil with little scrapes and he was looking at them like they’re morons and then just silently walked away and came back with a giant shovel... “if you keep doing this with your tiny scoopers, we’re gonna be here all night” and they then they just watched him as he did everything himself LMFAO I just love him so freaking much. I also think his relationship with Nagisa are incredible and so underrated, since it’s a huge and incredible part of the books. I just keep saying, Haru’d be an amazing dad, so I can’t wait for him and Rin to adopt xD

P.P.S. And what about the Free! novelization????!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAA

[cherrywoes]

AAAA YES- I have been waiting for this opportunity haha! May I ask for just a soft moment between the reader and (now known as) Shion? I’m absolutely enamoured by their relationship and I just want to see the two maybe cuddle a bit and act disgustingly domestic. I wouldn’t mind either headcanons of how they generally act around each other maybe even a small story of maybe 2k ish words? Whatever you’re comfortable with!

Tbh I’m just looking forward to learn more about Shion and his mannerisms TT I hope you have a wonderful day and take care!

a/n: haha i was waiting on this to show up! <3 i did both the small story and the headcanons (at the end) so i hope you enjoy! this ended up around 3k so i’m pretty happy with the result. you have a wonderful day as well! for those of you who don’t know who ama-no-kagaseo/shion is, he’s an oc from my jjk fic dark sun. 

of custard buns, apples, and mandarin oranges.

— ama-no-kagaseo (shion) + reader.

It was a quiet day for you today. There were no assassins, no awful weather to rain on your parade (quite literally, might you add), and, somehow, Sayaka would not be at your side today. Something about a first grade Curse had pulled her away for the day, sending her to the countryside—a place not known for its Curses—for the time being. You weren’t sure why Gojou couldn’t do it, since he was perfectly capable of going himself, but you weren’t going to ignore the chance that this brought you.

You were going to make pastries.

“Pastries?” Ama-no-Kagaseo (Shion, now, you needed to remember) materialized at your side, so close that he was practically leaning on you. He was oddly more in tune with your thoughts than usual after you’d given him that name, or something had changed—more specifically, his attention revolved around you more than anything else now. While that malevolent nature still crept out at times—never to you, but to nearly everyone else on the campus—it was subdued, and he appeared almost docile though you knew that was far from the truth. “I’ve never seen you make them before.”

His innocent curiosity of everything you did was endearing, to say the least. Having never taken interest in human pursuits before, he was set on learning everything you did even if he had no true want to learn it in the first place. He learned it because, through that activity, whatever it may be, he was closer to you, and therefore, in his mind, any time spent being close to you was precious time to him. Being a god and immortal, time that was considered anything other than ‘boring’ was important to him, however, most of it being linked back to you could be a very deadly double-edged sword… for other people, perhaps.

With a smile, you shook your head and held up an index card with the recipe for coconut custard buns. It was one of your favorites, something Sayaka had always bought for you when you were younger and had a notorious sweet tooth, and you’d been craving it recently. But without any way to contact her while she was off on a mission, you were left with only one other option: to make them yourself. You’d discovered the recipe (admittedly, you’d been snooping at first) in a magazine that had belonged to Gojou at some point. It had been left in the common rooms and, well, you considered it free game if he had just left it there when he was done with it.

“That’s because I haven’t,” you replied with a small laugh. You could feel his question burning into the side of your face without even having to look over at him. If you did, you would see a slightly pleading expression on his face, followed by the faint bunching of his brows because Amatsumikaboshi did. Not. Plead. But for you, he most likely would and that was all that mattered. “Yes, you can help me make them, Shion.”

He lit up like a light at the sound of his name. You’d been struggling to remember to call him that and not Ama-no-Kagaseo or Amatsumikaboshi, having done so for years beforehand, so breaking a habit like that was difficult for you. There was a set preconception to those names; all the higher ups saw him as was the malevolent, admittedly vicious god who would see them all destroyed if he had his way, but this was not ‘Amatsumikaboshi’—at least not to you. You’d seen several sides of him in the past few years, but this one—excited, happy even—was the one you liked the most, even if you were fond of both aspects of his godhood.

In his adult and personal form, he looked almost like a giant, overeager puppy—dragon, you thought, at a second glance, peering at the horns poking out over strands of white hair—at the idea of helping you cook. Which, to most people, might be bizarre in and of itself; what god would lower himself to cooking?

“What do they taste like?” He inquired, further leaning on you to the point where he was about to push you over. He wanted a glimpse of the index card, you thought, but then he rested his head on your shoulder instead. He was careful to avoid poking you with his horns and had his head situated at an odd angle that looked uncomfortable. “[Name]?”

“Hmm?” You hummed, pressing your mouth to the top of his head in a mockery of a kiss. He did this to you all the time, and now you understood why: it was extremely intimate, very close and comforting. He always smelled like an interesting mix of the ocean, some tropical flower that you had no name for, and almond oolong tea. It never changed, even when he was in a different form, oddly enough. You didn’t mind it. It was a very sweet, pleasing scent. “Oh, they taste like… custard and tangzhou bread, but I guess you wouldn’t know what that tastes like. You can try it and see if you like it, since you will be helping me.”

“Can we make them now?” He asked, shifting so he was looking up at the underside of your jaw and eyelashes. “I’m curious.”

“Of course.” You smiled and gently pushed a few strands away from his eyes so you could see them better. He’d always had pretty eyes, you’d thought, that seemed to shine with more knowledge than you could ever fathom. Now, though, they were focused on you, those slit pupils wide enough that you could see your reflection in them. As an afterthought, you leaned down and kissed his forehead, much in the same way he did to you when he thought you were napping. When you pulled away, you watched a pale blush creep up his neck and ears, which was just adorable. “But first, we need to make you blend in a bit.”

Confusion rolled across his face like a thundercloud. He stood and helped you to your feet when you struggled to get your legs out from under yourself, numb from sitting so long, and held your weight for a few moments while you waited for the blood to flow back into your legs. “Blend in?”

“Mhm.” You touched his horns and then pointed to his kimono. “I don’t think there’s anyone here right now, but in case someone comes in you’ll look like you’re just a sorcerer. If someone found out you could separate yourself from me like this, they’d report it to the higher ups and I’d be put back in confinement again.”

“No,” Shion said, and at first you thought it was to making him blend in. The scowl that appeared on his face was lethal. “I’ll kill them first.”

With a light laugh, you rose to your tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. It was almost like watching magic, the way his scowl turned into a pleased little smile. “You can’t kill everyone who finds out about you. Then they’ll get suspicious and know it was you.”

“You’re right,” he acknowledged, after a moment, leaning just a bit closer to you. “How will I ‘blend in’, so to speak.”

“Well…” You looked up at his horns, then his hair���which wasn’t all that strange, Gojou had white hair and Itadori had pink hair—and afterwards, his yukata. He could easily be mistaken as a member of one of the three clans and you could say he was replacing Sayaka for the day. You reached up and fingered his horns, surprised at how sharp the individual points were; they were almost like a deer’s horns. “Can you make these go aw—”

And just like that, they were gone, leaving you touching nothing but air.

“Right,” you mumbled, lowering your hand to pick up the astronomically long lengths of hair running down his back. It ended right at his hips, so you could, theoretically, just tie it into a bun and leave it like that. You’d seen plenty of Zen’in men wear their hair like that. “Okay, sit over here.”

You sat down on the edge of your bed and patted the floor with your foot. You retrieved your brush from the nightstand and waited until he was settled, then picked up a strand of hair and started brushing from the bottom to the roots. While they weren’t tangled, you didn’t want to cause him any kind of pain—could he even feel pain?—and gently ran the brush through his hair. He made no complaint and allowed you to continue sectioning off parts of his head, and obediently let you tilt his head this way and that so you could get the areas hanging over his shoulder.

When you were finished brushing it and making sure there weren’t any knots, you set down the brush and began combing his hair back with your fingers. He went entirely limp against your legs, a deep, rolling purr echoing from somewhere in his chest although you could feel it echoing in your shins. You’d heard him purr like that a few times before, usually when he was sitting in the sun of your window like a particularly lazy cat, but this was the first time he’d done it because of something you did. And it was unusually loud, as well, and you had to wonder if it was because he was starting to drift off.

You gathered the rest of his hair up, brushed out the parts that stuck out, and tied it off with a piece of twine you’d had lying around. You didn’t think he would appreciate wearing a sparkly blue ponytail—actually, he more than likely wouldn’t mind matching you. An idea for another day, then.

“Alright,” you said, resting your hands on his shoulders. The purring stopped and he stretched, lifting his arms above his head and popping almost every single bone in his back until he was done. Then he relaxed, head in your lap, and stared up at you. “What?”

Shion continued staring, golden eyes flicking over your face contemplatively. “You’re the most beautiful human in existence to me.”

Oh. You could just feel the blood rushing up to your face, hot and tingly. You stared down at him, mouth falling open in useless stutters, then closed your mouth and pressed your hands to your face. “I… Um…”

“You don’t need to say anything.” He reached up and gently nudged your arm out of the way so he could rest the pads of his fingers against your heart. “I can feel everything you do.”

You were hesitant to lower your hands, but at an encouraging pulse sent through your connection, you dropped them to your lap and cradled his face in your hands. It was moments like these where you had to wonder if Shion knew everything or what you only made obvious. He never said anything, if he did, so you supposed he kept to himself so you could say what you wanted to and nothing else.

The both of you stayed like that for a few moments, caught in an interesting limbo, until you remembered the whole point of making him look somewhat human in the first place.

“Alright,” you sighed, sufficiently calmed down enough that you could make sense of your words again. You patted his cheek softly in a gesture for him to get up. “Let’s go make those custard pastries, hm?”

The college kitchen was nothing to scoff at, but it was also everything you’d never had before. You had cooked before, of course, but not with anything super high tech. Luckily it was easy enough to figure out how to work the oven and you gathered the ingredients from the cupboards, setting them all down on a counter, and got to work.

Shion (even wearing an apron) helped you through every step, although you left the kneading and stirring to him since he was the god and you, decidedly, were not. He was happy to do whatever you asked of him and it was funny watching him get irritated with the ball of dough when you said it needed to rest before you could stuff it and cook it.

While you waited thirty some minutes for the dough to sit and rise, you retrieved a small bowl of fruit you had cut while watching him labor over the dough. It was mostly apples and mandarin oranges, both some of your favorites. You didn’t want to get your hands sticky so you used chopsticks to eat them, and offered an apple slice to Shion when he sent a curious glance at the bowl. He stared at it for a moment and then leaned down to take a hesitant bite of it, pulling away so you couldn’t make him eat the rest if he didn’t like it. You popped the rest in your mouth and watched his face for any sign that he didn’t like it, but when he finished chewing he nodded his head and gestured for you to give him another.

You spent the next thirty minutes like this, eating apples and oranges and offering some to Shion whenever he indicated he wanted another. He spent a lot of time savoring the flavors while you just ate one and immediately ate another, which you assumed came down to him never eating human food before.

When the dough finished rising, it took you no time to fill them and pop them in the oven with Shion’s help. With thirty five minutes more to wait, you sat down in a chair and Shion followed, standing behind you and wrapping his arms around your shoulders.

“Shion?” You asked, inching your head back to mimic the pose he had been in earlier. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.” He looked amused that you had to ask. “What is it?”

“Why do you always want me to wear kimonos?” You inquired. You’d always assumed it was to signify that you were his vessel in the most obvious way possible, but you’d also never asked him. You’d just assumed. “These ones specifically.”

“Ah.” He nodded and his eyebrows furrowed deeply in thought. “Before I was cast aside as a failed product, my mother—Izanami, as I’m sure you know—made a set of kimonos specifically for the one I would choose as a partner one day. She did this for all of my siblings, I believe. The originals are lost to time, so I made these in their fashion.”

“Oh.” You touched the hem of your kimono thoughtfully. “And these—they don’t remind you of your mother?”

“No.” Shion rested his chin on your head with a pleased sigh. “You wear them, therefore they remind me of you.”

And you had to say you didn’t mind that.

The custard buns were done after twenty minutes or so, so you parted from Shion and pulled them out of the oven to let them cool. Or, at least, that was your intention; Shion, foolishly or stupidly, you didn’t know, picked one up with his bare hand and you had to watch in disbelief as he took a bite of nearly scalding hot bread and custard and said ‘It’s good’.

“Shion!” You exclaimed, watching his eyes dart over to you over the custard bun in his hand. “That’s hot! You can’t just eat it like that—”

“Why not?” He interrupted, taking another bite as if just to spite you. “It’s not too hot.”

“For you, maybe,” you sighed, watching with envy as he polished off the rest of his bun in one go. “I have to wait for them to cool.”

He seemed to realize, belatedly, what he had done—or he felt your envy, at any rate—and frowned. He approached you and swept you into his arms, nuzzling his nose into the side of your head affectionately. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize.”

You exhaled through your nose and rubbed his back soothingly, indicating you weren’t mad at him. “It’s okay, Shion. Here, help me clean up while I wait for them to cool off and consider it forgotten.”

He nodded eagerly and, in the span of about two seconds, proceeded to use his curse energy to sweep everything back into the cupboards they had come from. You watched, dumbfounded, as the doors unlatched and opened to allow flour, sugar, and yeast to return inside and slam closed once he was done.

“That’s one way to do it,” you laughed and began packing the rest of the custard buns into a small box, holding your hand out for Shion to take. He took it willingly, falling in step beside you and following you back to your dorm room. “Did you like the custard or was it too sweet?”

“Mm…” Shion watched as you kicked off your shoes and opened the door to your room. “It was good. I preferred the fruit more.”

“I’m guessing you like natural sweets, then,” you guessed, opening the box. They were now pleasantly warm and not too hot for you, unlike Shion, so you took a bite and nodded in satisfaction. They tasted just like your memories, if not a little sweeter but you didn’t mind it. It wasn’t going to be a perfect imitation, after all. You finished your bun and closed the box so no more heat would escape and laid on your bed, careful not to allow Shion’s human body to flop to the side in his sling. You’d almost forgotten it was there, you’d been so occupied with him for the day, and you wondered how he felt about it.

“It’s an irritant,” he answered, following your thoughts. He joined you and snuggled up to your free side, your arm instinctively coming up to lower your hand to his cheek. Shion slung one arm across your stomach, just under the sling, and pulled you closer, intent on getting comfortable even at your expense. “That body keeps you prisoner to it, and I am not even within it—just linked to it.”

“You’re not in it?” You repeated, turning your head to look at him in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Those Sukuna cultists ruined the ritual,” he replied nonchalantly. “Not that these people here know that. So you don’t have to hold it all the time; there are no repercussions unlike if they had actually completed it properly.”

“So…” You allowed a hand to come up and touch his human form delicately. “I could let your body lay next to me and I wouldn’t have to worry?”

“No.”

So you unhooked the sling from your shoulders, free of the weight for the first time in years, and held your breath as his human body rested next to you. Shion reached over you and tugged a blanket up and over you, his human body, and himself, finally comfortable.

“I wonder…” You stroked Shion’s cheek in thought, staring up at the ceiling while he drifted off, that interesting purr kicking up against your side. “Hmm.”

With a cursory glance at his human body, still deathly still as it always was, you turned your back to it and snuggled up to Shion, nudging your head under his chin and settling in for a nap.

Like all the times you had slept with him near, you felt, of course, at peace.

headcanons:

shion and the reader are very close--and i mean very, very close, to the point where they freely share affection and (as indicated) their food. they are also very comfortable with each other as well, more than with anyone else in their lives.

shion’s natural curiosity extends to the reader and only the reader. so anything she does, he will most likely either a) want to participate or b) ask her about what she’s doing and if she likes it or not.

shion actually has a very bad habit of listening in on the reader’s thoughts and feelings even if she isn’t aware of it, which usually gives him a head’s up on her emotional state. while the reader doesn’t listen to his out of respect, she sometimes takes a peek, unaware that he does notice when she does.

shion’s purring comes from the fact that he does have a dragonic form. he does this when he’s at ease, or happy, both of which are shown in this drabble. it translates into his human form through an extra set of vocal chords.

the reader is shion’s favorite anything, and as such, he’s protective of her—perhaps too protective. shion is still a malevolent god and he still has those tendencies to become violent, and while he will never become violent with the reader (he doesn’t have the heart to even shout at her) that does not go for anyone else who is in her general vicinity.

shion has a little habit where he’ll instinctively want to be touching the reader, almost like a particularly clingy cat. sometimes he won’t, but most of the time he most absolutely will.

because of his origins as a formless god, he’s touch starved, which might not mean much because he’s a god, right? he had no affection from his mother and father, izanami and izanagi, so he knows nothing about love and affection, so when he gets it from the reader, he feels like he belongs, and thus, has no qualms about doing whatever is necessary to keep her safe.

shion doesn’t actually understand the emotions he feels. like referenced in the chapters, his emotional understanding is around that of a toddler’s—he knows what it is, can feel it, but he doesn’t understand the deeper meaning to them. he just knows they are there and acknowledges that they are caused by the reader. his logical understanding, however, is that of a god’s, and so he makes logical equations of his emotions instead, which can be quite the double edged sword.

shion is an intj-t.

shion can’t really taste anything synthetic, so he was lying when he said the custard was good so he wouldn’t hurt the reader’s feelings. :’)

that gif at the top perfectly represents shion’s reaction to being offered an apple slice. 

requests are: open. 

[deejadabbles]

Crimson Portrait (Seto Kaiba x Reader)

So as I said in my drabble a couple days ago, I’m wanting to write some short fics to get back into the swing of things and I wanted to gift said drabbles to some mutual I adore. Next on my list is @ohyema​ the top Vampire and Yugioh enthusiast on this site! I’m sure you’ve all seen her amazing art floating around already, but in case not please check out her stuff (and reblog the heck outta it!), the way she colors her pieces and adds dramatic flair is something I aspire to tbh <3 

For this fic I decided to spread my proverbial wings and write Seto for a change (don’t get used to this though, Kaiba fans, I’m still not a Kaiba stan lol) and I hope you enjoy our dark, mysterious blood thirsty, CEO ;)

You gulped, eyes traveling up the metal and glass of the building as though counting each towering floor would make it any less intimidating. It wasn’t just the size, of course, it was the marble path spread out in front of the entry, it was the literal red carpet on the other side of doors- it was the gold etching and suited man around said doors! You found yourself clutching the portfolio case under your arm even tighter to your chest. Subtle lights brightened the edges of the building, though you were sure they were meant to make it shine like a beacon of wealth at night, rather than give it any cheer or levity. 

This was by far the fanciest place you had ever been and the doorman casting a glance at you made you tug at your clothes for probably the seventeenth time since heading here. The outfit was fine, you reminded yourself; professional, but simple. Nothing that would impede your movements and work, all while still being close enough to your true fashion to offer you some self assurance. And you needed every ounce of self assurance possible right now.

After taking in a long, deep breath and straightening your posture, you started for the door. Despite the high chance that he was suspicious of you, the doorman pulled on the finely crafted handle and allowed you entry with a polite bow, nothing less. You weren’t sure if you were supposed to acknowledge him, but you returned the silent respect automatically. Then again, it didn’t really matter if you broke etiquette, you weren’t the high-class that lived here anyway.

The lobby was just as fancy as the outside. Your shoes clicked on more marble floors, and rich colored walls wearing frames of fine art surrounded you. There was a large wooden desk to one side, and the receptionist behind it clocked you as a non-resident, because she instantly greeted you with a “can I help you, miss?”

“Um- yes! Yes, I’m here to visit Mr. Seto Kaiba?” you followed the claim with your name and silently praying that was all you needed. The only way you were getting passed the front desk was if Kaiba (or his assistant) left your name with the attendant.

With a polite smile plastered on her face, she nodded and typed something quick on a computer obscured by the large backing of the desk. “Ah yes, Mr. Kaiba is expecting you. Please take the center elevator, he’s on floor 40.”

She waved her hand to the other side of the lobby, where three elevators with doors as clean and reflective as new mirrors stood. You gave her a quick thank you before following her instructions. The inside of the elevators were just as polished, the metallic sides reflecting your image. 

As the floors passed by, you checked to make sure the journey here hadn’t ruffled your appearance any, tucking hairs back into place, swiping your hand over the pristine portfolio briefcase, tugging at your hems yet again. You almost jumped when the elevator dinged, announcing your arrival at the top floor. You waited a few heart beats, long enough to start worrying you had the wrong floor- until it finally slid open.

The apartment was dimly lit, all the ceiling lights set to a dull, intimate glow one might see in a fancy bar. Then a different wave of nerves overcome you, hopefully this guy didn’t have the wrong idea of what service you were providing. 

“Are you going to come in, or continue wasting my time?”

You did jump that time, especially with how impatient the deep rumble of a voice sounded. With hurried steps you entered the apartment and ventured down the short hallway, following the voice. The hallway quickly opened into an expansive room, a couch, coffee table, TV, and desk on one side, and a kitchen, breakfast bar, dining table, and wet bar on the other. On the living room side, where the desk’s back sat, there was a large floor-to-ceiling window, the curtains pulled back to reveal the spiderweb of city lights and life beyond. 

Of course, what really drew your attention was the man standing in front of the window.

He hadn’t turned from the view to look at you let alone greet you, hands tucked in his pockets as he watched the pulsing city life. He wore a white suit, with a blue button-up shirt and a dark blue tie, making for nice, clean lines for your portrait. Seto Kaiba. A household name in most countries, the secretive CEO of one of the biggest companies in the world who’s fame for innovation was only matched by his notorious hermit tendencies. He appeared on magazines often enough, but many pointed out that they were likely deliberate presentations to the world. Deliberate to alleviate rumors because, besides them, neither Kaiba nor his younger brother were ever seen out in public and even rather rarely in their own corporate buildings.

You weren’t exactly someone who bought into that celebrity gossip, but it was still rather surreal seeing him in person like this.

“You can set up on the other side of the desk,” he started, still not turning from the window. “This is the background I want, I expect you to be able to handle it considering the portraits on your online portfolio.”

You tried not to gulp, “Of course, but it may take me an extra session or two to get the details.”

“As long as it’s done before I return to Domino,” he answered in a drawl, then, finally turned to face you. He placed a slender hand on the back of the leather desk chair, and you quickly made yourself busy with setting up. 

You felt that nerve-wracking, almost burning sensation of eyes watching you, and you could just imagine the icy blue of the eyes, remembering how Kaiba’s gaze always pierced through the magazine covers and into the viewer. Instead of thinking of how hawk-like he was watching you, you focused on how challenging and fun it will be to capture that quality in your painting.

Once your blank canvas was set up and your tools were spread out, ready for use, you finally locked eyes with the man. “I’m ready when you are, Mr. Kaiba, please take whatever pose you feel most comfortable with.” You had to ignore the shiver that ran down your spine, especially when he held your gaze for a moment more before finally shifting his stance.

After some verbal redirecting so his pose looked the best and got the key parts of the cityscape behind him, you actually got started on the canvas. Tokyo Tower stood like a sentinel behind him, making for nice framing, and he was a natural at posing, of course choosing one that was strong and commanding to the onlookers. 

It was quiet as you worked, he wasn’t playing any music, nor offering any chitchat. It was only then that you realized just how alone you two were in the penthouse, didn’t rich dudes like him have platoons of bodyguards?

Within the free seconds you had between maping your piece, your mind wandered back to the rumors surrounding the Kaiba family and their reclusiveness. Tales of Kaiba insisting on specially tinted windows for all his buildings and never being seen in the light of day led to some interesting ones. Mostly conspiracies about him being the secret illegitimate son of royalty, and inheriting hemophilia from said parentage. Now, noting how pale he looked against the background of vibrant city lights, you could slightly understand buying into that rumor. 

Not only that, but, the more glances you took while working, the more you noticed just how...sickly the man looked. His cheeks were a bit sunken, made worse by the dark circles under his eyes And on top of that, there was a sore redness around his eyes that was seeming to get worse every time you peered passed your canvas. None of his magazine pictures ever showcased these...unwell qualities. He must just be tired, you decided, being a CEO likely didn’t allow for much sleep, and here he was posing for a portrait late at night.   

You were just finishing up his outline when you decided attempt conversation. If he didn’t like it he would just tell you to shut up, after all.

“I was actually pretty surprised when you hired me, most people don’t bother with traditional portraits any more.”

There was awhile of silence, where Kaiba’s eyes flickered towards you before staring off to the other side of the room again. Your were just taking the mental note not to try a conversation again, when-

“It was my brother’s idea. I always look ahead, and cut out traditions and old ways that no longer serve me. But, he made the point that there are some classics still worth something. Besides, improving things like canvas portraits with modern settings was appealing.”

You found yourself smiling and nodding along, “Yeah, I really like the idea of having the city in the background, it’ll make for a really unique piece!” 

After picking your next brush, you peered over to refresh your mental image of the scene, only to find him staring at you again. His expression was rather indecipherable, and though his eyes were almost hooded the rest of his features were as blank as an empty page. Your heart was practically beating in your ears as you stayed transfixed in his gaze, which you swore were actually hued in red now, instead of solid icy blue.

A sound similar to a squeak, and you finally broke the contact to flick your gaze down to the hand resting on the back of the desk chair. His fingers were a sickly white, seeming to have no blood in them as his nails dug into the leather with a grip so strong he might be on the verge of puncturing the fabric.

Feeling that nervous heat again you quickly averted your gaze back to the canvas, even going as far as to shuffle behind it just slightly as though you could hide.

That didn’t help, much like when you were setting up, you could feel his gaze burning into you. Maybe he was offended, upset that you stared back at him, but he had no right to judge considering he was staring first! Seriously what was with this guy?

You weren’t sure how much time passed after that, it felt like an eternity but you were sure it wasn’t much longer than a half hour or so. You only stole glances at him when you absolutely felt like you had to refresh your mental image of the scene before giving another stroke of the brush. You avoided any eye contact even then and managed to skim over his face only once, during which you noted any previous color in his cheeks had vanished completely, but that was beside the point. You were just telling your brain to stop conjuring up theory’s on why he looked so sick and biting your tongue to keep from asking if he was alright when-

“We’re done for the night, you can continue tomorrow.”

If the sudden dismissal wasn’t enough to snap your attention back to him, the heavy breath within the words was. Your eyes snapped up to Kaiba and before you even registered his movement you were jumping from a harsh thud! He had removed his hand from the chair so swiftly that it spun and thudded into the desk with enough force to crack furniture of a lesser quality. 

Now Kaiba was pacing around his desk, gaunt jaw clenched so tight he might very well chip a tooth. Not wanting to argue with someone who apparently had the mood swings of an angst-ridden teen, you planned to start packing up without a word. However, just as he passed the coffee table, Kaiba took in a sharp breath and doubled over so fast he barely caught himself on the glass top.

Empathy won in a heartbeat and before you could reconsider you were by his side saying a frantic, “Are you okay? Mr. Kaiba you look sick, should I call a-?”

The concerned questions died in your throat and so too did a scream when something too red and too luminous to be eyes flashed up at you. The next moment something was wrapping around the prison that held your words and scream. The third moment your back was slammed none too gently into a wall you could have sworn was half a room away and a body colder than any you had felt before was pressing into you.

Eyes wide, body held still with fear, all you could do was take in a few shallow breaths as Kaiba’s mouth hovered over your neck. One heart thundering in your ears, two heartbeats, three-

But nothing happened. 

The hand pressing into your clavicle hadn’t tightened, and the mouth hovering dangerously close had not moved in for the kill (proverbial or otherwise), rather, Kaiba’s body seemed to be as frozen as yours.

Or at least you thought it was. A moment later you finally registered that Kaiba was shaking. Not violently by any means, hell, it was barely notable, but he was definitely shaking, as if he was trying to keep sickly shivers from wracking his body. His other hand moved up to grip your upper arm then, and his fingers were tight but not quite painful as he held you there.

“I shouldn’t have kept our appointment.”

The words were so shocking to your reeling mind that you almost didn’t register them. They were said lowly, in something akin to a growl or rumble.

“I should have told you to get out the moment I-”

Something on the other side of the condo sounded, a ding you had heard when first arriving on the floor, and not a second later footsteps were thundering.

“Seto!”

The youthful voice almost snapped you back to your sense enough to move, maybe even break free of his hold, but in that same moment  you felt something sharp graze the skin of your neck as Kaiba’s face turned to meet the newcomer.

Thankfully your recovered control wasn’t needed, as the moment Kaiba locked sites on the newcomer, he released his hold on you. In a fearful blink as you recovered your balance, you saw Kaiba make his way across the room faster than any human possible could.

That’s when you saw who had intervened; Mokuba Kaiba, the youth of the Kaiba empire. He was looking pale and worried, looking between his brother and you as Seto snatching something out of his hands. 

You caught the sight of something encasing red as Seto tore the package open, but he halted long enough to growl another command, “You need to leave, now.”

Your legs were finally able to move again, when you caught site of something that confirmed the impossible theories running though your head: sharp, pearly fangs were flashing between Seto’s lips.

[yelenasdog]

man out of time (winter soldier!bucky x fem time traveler!reader)

genre: idk, kinda angsty tbh but it ends w like a weird kind of funky fluff, if u will.

summary: she’s spent 60 years, hopping from timeline to timeline. but yet, she never managed to find james, find the kind of love they had. but what if she did?

words: 1.1k 

warnings: mentions of hydra’s abuse, that’s literally, it but if i missed anything lmk!

a/n: uhhh idk wtf this is i wrote it when i went to the beach like 3 months ago and i didn’t touch it until today to like fix it?? idk it’s not my fav but i hope you’ll enjoy!! the whole time travel thing i thought was a cool concept so yah.

·。·☆·。·。

All that could be heard was the dripping from the pipes, slowly falling onto the concrete, one after the other into the dirty pool of reflection.

Then, the silence was broken.


“Buck?”

The sob was choked out, was strained and sad. She wasn’t quite sure how she had made it into this position.

James Barnes was dead. He was supposed to be dead.

She had long ago mourned him, cried for him, moved on from him (to the best of her ability). She had spent 60 years doing so, hopping from timeline to timeline, unable to find any love like what they had shared.

There was an Italian fellow in 1743. He could play the cello like no other and had the prettiest eyes she had ever seen, next to James’. There was the French man in 1809 who was the kindest gentleman with the purest heart she ever had the pleasure of breaking, next to James’. Oh, and she could never manage to wipe her memory of the 1970s rockstar who managed to show her the world in a simple 4 months. He had the most beautiful locks she adored running her fingers through, smiling when she heard sighs of satisfaction falling from his lips. Just like James would do, but still. It was never him.


This, whatever it was, wasn’t fair. She had thought it must have been her brain playing a cruel joke on her. But it wasn’t, it wasn’t at all.

Whatever it was, was no longer the youthful boy with the full cheeks and playful grin. This was an abandoned shell of the aforementioned, who had been drained of all his worth, been used and abused more times than he could count. Cheeks sunken, eyes dull.

It, he, was a ghost.

It was merely a shadow, somewhat of a whisper in the cool wind of the dark night.

He was muttering something unfamiliar, the sound of his voice weak, and lacking any emotion. Despite that, the sound of its gravelly tone gave her a sense of comfort, healing the wound of longing that had been open to infection for so long.

He stepped further into the dim light of the warehouse, and she watched as it flickered on the cement floor, unable to meet his eyes. 
They were her favorite thing about him in the 40s, how they held so much feeling and joy, so much love for her.

It wasn’t like that anymore. They were empty, a gaze of loss and confusion filling them up completely.

“Bucky, it’s me, it’s Y/n.”

He turned his head like a hound being told to “roll over”, trying to recollect any memory of who she might be (or had been).

“I don’t know you.”

“Yes, yes you do, James. In fact you didn’t just know me, you loved me as I love you. You spent every Saturday evening at my house, went to church the next morning with my mother and I.” She laughed at the fond memories, another tear escaping. “You really were a gentleman.”

It was quiet. He was supposed to kill her, he knew. She was a witness. He should take out his damn gun, shoot her dead. Or maybe his knife, but that would get too messy. Point was, he needed to kill her. But he couldn’t.

He didn’t know why. His head was screaming at him, the small voice insisting that she was against the rightful mission of Hydra, and therefore needed to be eliminated. But his heart? His seemingly stone cold heart that had no place in his work? It was telling him the opposite, reasoning with him. She loved him? Nobody had loved him before, not that he knew of.

It was all too much, he couldn’t take the flood of emotions that was pounding at his skull, forcing its way through the dam Hydra had worked so hard over the years to build.

“No, stop!”

“Bucky?” She cautiously made her way towards him, watching with tears in her eyes as he cried, tearing off his dark glasses and mask with his metal hand, chest heaving. The faint light in the warehouse shone on his knuckles, almost glimmering.

She knew he was wildly dangerous, she knew that this was out of her league. To rescue him, save him.

But she didn’t seem to care as she approached him, thoughts of the rabid man harming her not even somewhat prevalent in her mind. And even if they were, they were squashed down, far away in a dark corner of her brain with cobwebs and thoughts long forgotten.

“James, you’re okay.”

He met her eyes, an angry expression coming across his features. He was beginning to listen to the voice’s angry shouts, believing that she was indeed the origin of these distraught emotions he felt. The voice became louder, covering up his heart’s feeble cries to try to listen to her, to run to her and be comforted by her loving touch that was now waiting patiently for him, just as it had been the past 60 years. He stood up, walking towards where she had been crouching a fair distance away, his boots dragging. In response, she stood as well, taking a dominant stance.

It confused him. She should be cowering, neck down, arms crossed. Not standing before him like she wasn't afraid. 
Why was she not afraid?

Truthfully, she didn’t have it in her to be scared of him. Saddened for? Definitely. Worried for beyond belief? Of course. But scared? Not a chance.

She raised her voice, taking long strides towards him, her mind racing a million miles a minute while not quite having the time to process if what she was attempting was quite the right way to go about it. For Heaven’s sake, she had 60 years to go over her plan, but I guess she never quite considered every possibility, the specifics, if you will.

“Soldier.”

Gears were turning in his head, recognizing the word, as that’s what his handlers called him. And he always complied when they did. He would listen, doing whatever they said. But she wasn’t a handler, if he had remembered correctly.

“Soldier, drop your weapon.”

It dropped, but nonetheless, his suspicions had gotten the best of him. He continued his walk towards her, head tilted. “Who are you?” He spoke in a foreign tongue, the words ill fitting to fall from his chapped lips.

She grinned, once again thinking of the beautiful past they shared.

“Doesn’t matter.” She said, reaching for his hand and gripping tightly, quickly adjusting her dials on her wrist with the opposite hand. He looked over to the small screen above where she was messing around, squinting at the blinking green numbers that read “1943”.

“James, we’re going home.”

·。·☆·。·。

i hope u liked!! make sure to rb if u did :D mwah love u, take care of urself love bug!!

xx hj

[flower-of-the-desert]

hey, i really liked your posts about ep12, it helped me a lot to put things into perspective. i was wondering if you could share your thoughts on the 2gether finale as well, coz right now i just wanna cry im so disappointed with it =(

Aww, thank you, anon. <3

Ok so my thoughts on the finale are kind of all over the place but I’ll try to explain as best as I can and hopefully it’s gonna make sense.

Like I said, in my original post I dont love the ep but I dont hate it either. I suppose I fall somewhere in the middle. I enjoyed a lot of it - seeing all the couples progress and be happy together, Man/Type especially were just so adorable, Mil and Phukong starting to build something with each other (lil bro using Sarawat’s pick up line was a really nice touch, love that), Mil being an all around awesome supportive friend to BOTH Tine and Wat?? We love to see it. The way he turned up at the football field where Wat was being his angsty self and literally kicked his butt into taking action - *chef’s kiss*

Him and Fong are now the parents of the baby gays I dont make the rules.

Wat’s confession on stage and his song that he literally named after Tine and when he said he never confessed to Pam because he didnt know what love was before he met Tine - perfection. Absolute perfection. I’m here for it.

And Tine’s heartbreak was so well done too, I just felt so much for him.

Again, as I said, the whole thing with Pam didnt turned out exactly as I had hoped but it wasnt the worst case scenario either so I’ll take it. I’d rather have Pam making a mistake and realising it and backing off while assuring Tine that Wat really does love HIM and even though she tried Pam didnt stand a chance because it’s always gonna be Tine for Sarawat and she understands that now over her being an actual bitch who keeps trying to seperate them and uses the situation to her advantage. I mean they could have gone that way too - Pam didnt have to give Tine that recording or to tell him how Wat changed after meeting him but she did, I think, as her own way of apologizing for what she’d done. So yeah, overall, I’m fine with this.

ALSO NOBODY DIED SO THAT’S A BIG PLUS.

(History 3 MODC can’t relate)

ANYWAY, so those are the positives for me. Which as it turns out is most of the episode yay! Now onto what wasnt quite so positive.

My main issue with this episode is the resolution to Wat and Tine’s conflict. Mainly, there really... wasnt one. And I’m not talking about the physical intimacy thing, I’ll touch on that later but more importantly for the ending - the emotional intimacy. None of the problems they had were properly addressed. Tine’s insecurities were rooted so deeply that despite Wat spending 12 EPISODES doing anything and everything to show his love and adoration, Tine still couldnt really believe it. And that’s not gonna be resolved with a simple recording.

And on the other hand, can you image how all of this would make Sarawat feel? Like no matter what he does, no matter how much of himself he gives to Tine, his boyfriend still would find it easier to believe that Wat is just using him as a replacement for someone else. That’s gonna fuck with his head even if Tine came back. I really really wished they had talked at least a little about these things.

Like maybe if we didnt have half of the episode filled with pointless flashbacks there could have been time to actually talk... (tbh, part of me kind of wonders if they purposefully put in so many flashbacks to fill in the air time so they wouldnt HAVE to write those scenes which leaves me ?????).

I think I mentioned this too in the other post, but the Wat/Tine reunion echoes beat for beat the Fighter/Tutor reunion with all its issues but while WhyRU has a reason for why things turned out like that, here I just... I dont know what could have been the reason for 2gether’s writers? Unless they also couldnt film everything they wanted...

And then there’s the... “high-five controversy”, let’s call it and again I find myself in the middle of the argument. I stand by what I’ve said before about how I feel about the way they handled physical intimacy between the characters - yes, objectively and critically speaking, I’m not here for writers/directors/channel/whoever trying to censor the physical intimacy of an established couple. There is nothing wrong with two partners wanting to kiss/cuddle/have sex/etc. Sex isnt something dirty (I mean it can be depending on what you’re writing BUT THAT’S A DIFFERENT GENRE OK, we are not talking about smutty fic here cough cough) and shameful that “pure” people shouldnt be enjoying (lovely post on the topic here I was just thinking about it last night). And it’s about time show creators got with the programme, ESPECIALLY when it comes to non-straight couples.

As of ep13 it’s clear to me that 2gether went through some serious censorship - lots of people have talked about how it’s a thing that they do on this particular channel and maybe that’s all it is, I dont know. I dont want to speculate what’s been going on behind the scenes since I dont have any idea and sadly I dont think the writers will ever be willing to talk about it. I’d LOVE to hear their throughts on this matter tbh and why they decided to do things this way.

So on an objective level, this is bullshit. Subjectively, and this is where my personal opinion comes in, I wasnt as bothered by this as I normally would be because I’ve been enjoying all the other aspects of the relationship that the show successfully built up and prtrayed on screen. Does that make sense?

Specifically about the finale, though, I agree with the complains. Part of why the reunion felt so underwhelming and disappointing, I think, was not only the lack of emotional intimacy but also the hella.... awkward? physical “intimacy” they showed? The scene absolutely did call for a kiss or a hug, at the very least. Instead they were standing 2 feet apart cause... they’re not gay? I really really do not understand what happened there in that scene. I’ve seen some people mention that the finale was filmed before the other episodes so the actors werent used to each other yet and honestly I can see it - watching Tine and Wat in that ending montage felt like I was watching them at the beginning of their fake dating when both were awkward and unsure of where they stood with each other rather than seeing an established in love couple coming back together after going through something tough.

So these are my thoughts on the finale. It wasnt the best one I’ve ever seen but not bad enough to ruin the rest of the show for me (and there’s NOTHING I hate more than bad endings ruining a story I’ve fallen in love with so there’s that) and I do really love this show and its characters so much. It’s hard, even impossivle to find a perfect show from start to finish and honestly I’ve come to believe that’s not as important as what you get out of it - if the show makes you happy, despite whatever writing issues it might have, that’s the most important thing, I think. And 2gether did that for me. So I’m glad I watched it.

Omg, this got so long. Again. If you’re still with me, anon, you’re a hero. I hope I was able to help you. <3

[mortaljin]

Out of the Sky

Word Count: 2.1k Warnings: Profanity Genre: Fluff, light angst (we’ll see) | Guardian Angel!Namjoon

Summary: How your adorable, clumsy guardian angel still manages to save your life is beyond you.

A/N: This was originally supposed to be a oneshot, but I hate going so long without giving you guys something. So, it will be a mini series. Tbh, I’ll likely change the name of this once its finished.

Masterlist

There was a lipstick smudge on your chin that you just couldn’t seem to correct in the amount of time you did not have to do so; the bright pink smudge was the aftermath of that sandwich you didn’t think to eat before doing your makeup. Your friends would be here any moment and you were in desperate need of just starting over.

You felt a little stressed, if not downright defeated, at the failure of your looks tonight. The outfit you picked out last night—which was SO cute—no longer looked flattering anymore. But now, as you stared at your reflection, your usually cute fashion sense seemed to be as bland as ever.

Sighing, you leaned into the mirror a little closer and took the pad of your finger to smudge off the pink blotch. The lipstick was removed alright, along with the rest of the makeup in that area. There was, unfortunately, no time to completely fix your chin area. So, you blended in some foundation and called it good.

At least your hair looked nice.

Right?

The beginning of doubt creeping into your head was shaken by the alert of your phone, which you presumed signaled the arrival of your friends. Instead of fussing, you straightened yourself out and decided that it would be okay to not be perfectly primped tonight.

You would not be the center of attention tonight, anyway.

With the ping of your phone echoing in your head, you left your bathroom and scurried down the hall. Yuki wanted to go out on the town tonight, so your best bet was anything other than heels. She could run a marathon in them, but not you.

Your purse’s contents were laying haphazardly on the entryway table with your keys in one bowl, wallet in another, and other things in the drawers. And, of course, your purse had fallen and had been kicked under the table. It was a wonder how you ever managed to find anything.

I’ll clean this in the morning, you thought as you rushed out the door.

The sandals you decided to wear slapped across the hard floor as you powerwalked towards the elevators. Your apartment itself was small and a sight for sore eyes, but the complex itself? Every time you left and came home you were reminded why it was literally the cheapest place in the city.

The entrance of the building swung open and you were met with a much warmer night than you were expecting. It was early fall, but it felt like a midsummer evening instead. The weather, although odd, helped to lift your spirits ever so slightly.

All day you had been tripping up. As if life itself was nipping at your heels everywhere you went. It was the can of soup you dropped at the store this evening, or the pen that you just bought yesterday running out of ink this morning.

Even when you accidentally knocked over the trash in your kitchen it felt worse than it actually was. The mundane things of life just felt like they had a twist today.

Your phone had not dinged in the last few moments while you were leaving your home, so, you thought it best to actually check your texts.

The space between your brows creased as you furrowed them at the message on your screen:

Yuki 5 minutes ago: Were runming a lol late, sryy Y/N!

You huffed in annoyance at her lack of time management. Turning off the phone screen, you sat on the concrete steps. It was better to sit out here, you decided briefly, than to anxiously wait around in your apartment where you would surely continue nitpicking your looks for the evening.

The sun was almost done setting; the last sliver of the peachy glow barely reached the sides of the surrounding buildings. The warmth no longer stretched across the city but, instead, the cool, collected solace of the night was beginning to take place.

You sighed dreamily. Nighttime was always the hour in which you felt most comfortable, almost as if all your insecurities were masked in the darkness. The night was mysterious, enchanting, even sublime—

The screeching of tires could be heard in the distance, and you lazily looked up to see a car coming. It was still a couple miles back on the flat stretch of road, but no one would be driving at this hour except idiots and… your friends.

Adjusting your purse strap against your shoulder, you stood from the steps and began making your way down the sidewalk towards the edge of the road. The wind had been still when you first walked outside, but now it was picking up around you.

It was heavy enough to the point it made your hair whip around; your lipstick likely hadn’t fully dried and you couldn’t see through your own hair. So now you were standing there like a blind idiot with, again, sloppy lipstick.

In the midst of your delirium, you managed to notice the ground below you was rumbling ever so slightly. The uncanny situation made panic crawl up your spine and you took a couple steps back as you finished fighting with your hair.

As you looked up, the sight, and crack, of the nearby tree barreling straight towards you forced your feet to haul yourself backwards. You hit the edge of the sidewalk and tumbled ass first into the grass.

The crash of the tree was deafening as it knocked out a couple mailboxes and disturbed trashcans set out for pick up.

Your knees threatened to buckle underneath you as you stood up, heart pounding and confused. A faint shimmer could be seen in the foliage of the fallen tree, and your hand flew to your head to confirm you had hit your head.

Standing in horror as you watched the rustling of the tree, you prayed for your friends to arrive already so that they could get you admitted.

The light you think you’re seeing is only a side effect of disorientation and streetlights. Only, you heard the sound of a man groaning at a distance. This caused you to brace yourself at the arrival of another person.

But the person that you saw wasn’t who you were expecting.

It wasn’t a neighbor in the complex, nor some random person strolling the streets at night that you heard. No, out of the shimmering foliage rose a man so beautiful you thought you were seeing God.

He looked hurt, you assumed, from the way he was hunching over with his head down. Coughing, he stood up. You stood mesmerized as he shook out his shoulders, trails of golden dust falling from them as he did so. He rolled his head around, stretching out his neck until he noticed you were standing there. Staring.

Once he had caught sight of you, he turned fully towards you and smiled brightly. It was a terrifying sight, almost, to see a man so beautiful looking at you the way he was.

The fear was different than you had ever known, not fear for your safety. No, you weren’t afraid that you would be harmed. Instead you feared what you did not know.

Oh, but how you wanted to know.

“Are you Y/N?”

He was calm, professional, as if you were talking to a businessman. Not an angel.

Your mouth was left agape as you stood there in the night air with him. Surely you looked like a suffocating goldfish as it opened and closed without words, but still. You were in awe.

He apparently took that as a yes because he stepped forward through the foliage, hand outstretched.

“My name is Namjoon, your guardian angel.”

“What?” You lifted a trembling hand to your forehead, checking for any sign of a fever. “Ha… haha…” Maniacal laughs stumbled from your lips as you shook your head in disbelief. “I’ve finally lost my fucking mind.”

The man, “Namjoon,” stood there and watched your insanity with curiosity.

“Holy shit,” you wiped wetness from your eyes, “that’s rich, mister “guardian angel,” You added air quotes for mocking affect. “You did some shit guarding, then. I almost fucking died!”

Your mocking turned into screeching once you realized this psychopath was being as serious as could be. Surprisingly, no one from your apartments had come out to investigate the loud crash. Instead, the ruined tree laid silent in front of you.

He simply shrugged. “I’ll admit I cut it a little too close just now but…”

“But what?” You cute him off, “I’m supposed to be going out tonight and your psycho ass nearly killed me. Look, my friends are here now.”

Either your friends were driving really slow, or the incident with the “guardian angel” took much less time than you thought it would. Ignoring burning annoyance in your chest, you took off once again down the sidewalk leading from your apartment’s entryway.

You heard a tsking noise behind you.

“What do you want?” You gritted.

“Three more steps and that car is gonna get you.”

You rolled your eyes and began to turn as you heard the sound of the approaching vehicle. Desperation bubbled inside of you with the chance to get away from whatever it is that is going on here.

But before you could inch any further up the sidewalk, bright lights blinded you. The headlights came from your right with only enough time to throw your hand in front of your face before you were promptly getting pulled back.

The headlights belonged to a car that was certainly not being driven by your friends. This was obvious not only in the car itself, but also in the way that it jumped the curb and took out a couple of the trashcans.

Garbage laid splattered right in front of you; the knowledge that it very well could be you spilled out right there was enough to have your dinner threatening to leave your stomach.

“Oh, please don’t puke on me,” Namjoon whined.

It was only then that you registered that his hand was still firmly wrapped around your wrist; he had not let go since jerking you back from the sidewalk. The adrenaline was crawling up your throat and the events that just occurred only helped to confirm what the crazy man had been telling you earlier.

Your free hand flew to your mouth as your racing heart caused your emotions to rush out. “Oh, my g-g-god!”

Tears clouded your vision as your words got caught in your throat.

“H-how did you k-know th-that that was going to h-happen?”

He chuckled, but it didn’t seem as though he was laughing at you.

Honestly, you were still so scared right at that moment. It was two near death experiences back to back in the presence of some otherworldy man and it was almost too much to bear.

When you blinked away the tears that had no doubt ruined your makeup, you realized his eyes were so… sad?

Namjoon was no longer shining so brightly, instead it was a warm, soft glow radiating around him. It was only now that you realized his large, feathery wings were drooping.

He let go of your wrist and backed away.

“Y/N, please don’t be scared of me. You’re not scared of me, right?” His voice was low, yet brimming with panic.

You weren’t sure how to answer. One part of your mind was screaming to get away from the unknown entity. The other was nudging you to be curious, to find out more.

Luckily, the sound of your phone dinging distracted you from giving him an immediate reply. You were still trembling slightly, as was made obvious by your lit up phone screen shaking in the dark.

Yuki: this is Anna, we’re gonna have to cancel plans Yuki pre-gamed too hard. Shes sick, next Friday sound good?

A bitter sneer came from your mouth and it didn’t take long before you were shoving your phone in your pocket and looking up towards Namjoon again. Yuki’s lack of proper spelling made sense now.

“You’re not real,” you decided on. “I can’t be afraid of what’s not real. Goodnight.”

You muttered the farewell to yourself and ignored the exasperated sigh coming from the not-actually-real being behind you.

[helloalycia]

the exchange // alycia debnam-carey

summary: based off "the exchange" by camila bc why not. AKA you're in an unhappy relationship and fall for your boyfriend's best friend's girlfriend phew

warning/s: i guess cheating??

author’s note: look, i ain't about all that cheating shit. It's horrible and there's no valid reason tbh. This imagine wasn't intended to be a happily ever after in certain aspects, and tbh, everyone thinks they're the good guy hence the interpretation of this imagine is all down to perspective. It's based off the song, specifically the lyrics below, and it's up to you how you take it. I didn't intend for this to be taken seriously (just putting this here in case some of y'all get understandably pressed). People fall out of love and 'your' character should've done the right thing and broken things off but sometimes this (as in what happens) is just the reality of things.

okay, you can enjoy now lmao (i'm probs thinking WAY too far into this oops)

also, Y/M/N = your mother's name

"I think we should trade, 

Cupid told me he was drunk that day, 

and so he shot two arrows the wrong way. 

I heard him say, 

I think we should trade,

we'll tell 'em 'let's go on a double date,

meet us up at six in the café', 

we'll run away and call it the exchange."

         It was raining, hard.

         The patter of water against the window felt like miniature claps and I was sure the glass was trembling under the pressure. Nonetheless, the swirling grey clouds and intense rain fascinated me. It hadn't been like this when we'd left home – in fact, it had been relatively sunny. But as we sat and waited, the weather had progressively worsened. A shame, really. Well, to some.

         "Y/N, are you listening?"

         I tore my gaze from the window and met Ethan's brown eyes. He was sat beside me, watching with confusion as I blinked myself back into reality.

         "Yeah, sorry, what was that?"

         He rolled his eyes playfully and laughed before repeating whatever story he was telling. I felt bad, but once again, his lips were moving and no sound was coming out. Instead, I focused on our surroundings. The chatter of customers around us, the scent of coffee that had settled in the store, the bustle of baristas as they perfected their lattes. It was weird, as Ethan was like the background noise to everything else.

         "...and it's been a while, but I'm sure you'll love them both."

         Ethan had finished speaking and I looked back to him, forcing a small smile. He was talking about his best friend, Levi, who lived in Australia. Ethan hadn't met up with Levi in person for about a year now and Levi was moving back to L.A. – his hometown – with his new girlfriend. Well, new to Ethan and I anyway. Ethan had invited them both to meet at this coffee shop, the first meeting in a year.

         "Everything will be fine," I reassured Ethan. "You're right, I'm sure I'll love them."

         I didn't actually know Levi in person, only through the occasional video call. I wasn't really nervous to meet him, but Ethan figured I was. Should I have been? I didn't know.

         "Exactly," Ethan agreed, smiling a bright smile. Maybe for someone else his smile would have lightened up the room, especially in this dreary weather. Maybe his hand resting on their hand would have sent shivers down their spine. Maybe their stomach would be knotted with butterflies.

         I wasn't so sure.

         We had been together for a year now. He loved me. I had told him I loved him, too. But people can fall out of love, right? It was selfish of me to stay in this relationship, leading him on, when I felt nothing anymore. But I was still figuring out how to tell him. How could I let him down without hurting him?

         My mind was a mess, but I couldn't let that ruin now. He was excited to meet his best friend and I had to be a supportive girlfriend. That wouldn't be hard. I was happy for him.

         "Ethan?!"

         I looked up to see a tall blonde man walking towards our booth, a giant grin on his lips. He was holding hands with a girl, but as soon as he recognised Ethan, he let go of her and raced forward

         "Levi!"

         Ethan let go of my hand – I didn't miss the warmth – and slid out of the booth. His expression mirrored Levi's as he raced towards the blonde, meeting him halfway. The two embraced in a dramatic-like fashion, but nobody really took notice because of how busy the store was, despite the crappy weather.

         I sucked up a deep breath and slipped out of the booth as Ethan, Levi and the mystery girl approached me. Ethan was by my side instantly and I refrained from flinching at his unwanted touch.

         "You must be Y/N! It's so great to finally see you in person," Levi spoke first, a smile on his lips. He put out his hand and chuckled. "I'd give you a hug, but..."

         I shook his hand forced a small smile. I understood as he was soaking wet from the heavy rain outside, his hair plastered to his head.

         "You too," I said, hoping I sounded better than I felt.

         Levi seemed pleased with my response and shared a look with Ethan, but I was too uninterested to care.

         "This is my girlfriend, Alycia Debnam-Carey," he spoke again, this time reconnecting a hand with the mystery girl's. He looked to her and said, "Alycia, this is Ethan, as you kind of know. And this is Y/N Y/L/N, his girlfriend."

         The mystery girl – Alycia – stepped forward and pushed her dark, wet hair from her eyes. As her crystal green eyes flickered from the floor to mine, I felt stuck in my spot. She was beautiful and suddenly green was my favourite colour.

         "Lovely to meet you both," she said, smiling the most beautiful smile I'd ever seen. And god, she had the most adorable accent I'd ever heard.

         She too put out her hand, and Ethan shook it first, saying something or the other, but I wasn't really listening. I just knew that it made Alycia laugh and throw her head back with laughter. Her teeth were showing and her happiness spread like a warmth around the whole room. Her soggy appearance and wet clothes didn't seem to bother her – I couldn't imagine anything bothering her, to be honest.

         Suddenly, she was looking my way, her hand outstretched. I cleared my throat and placed my hand in hers, trying to ignore how soft and warm they were. Shivers travelled up my arm and she pulled away, her eyes lingering on mine a little longer. Had she felt it too?

         "Come on, let's sit," Ethan said, ushering us into the booth.

         I slid in first, taking my previous seat. I felt Ethan slide in beside me, but I was more aware of the brunette sliding in before me, her bare knees tickling mine underneath the table. Why was I suddenly so nervous?

         "...right, Y/N?"

         I realised Ethan was speaking to me again and tuned back into reality. When I met his gaze, he was watching me with concern.

         "Hm?"

         He licked his lips and asked, "You okay? You keep zoning out."

         I waved dismissively. "Yeah, just thinking, sorry."

         He nodded, though I could tell he wasn't convinced. It didn't bother me though because I was suddenly hyperaware of Alycia's and Levi's eyes on me.

         "I'll get you a hot chocolate, yeah?" he asked, probably having repeated himself.

         I nodded and turned to reach for my purse, but he simply shook his head and laughed.

         "I'm paying for my girlfriend, Y/N," he said, not leaving me chance to argue, as he stood up. He looked to Levi, who was also stood up, and said, "Come on."

         I watched as Levi leaned down to plant a soft kiss on Alycia's cheek, flinching when his lips made contact. He seemed to be going for her lips, but she turned at the last second. Levi thought nothing of it and both him and Ethan joined the queue to buy our drinks.

         I looked back to Alycia, who seemed nervous, but still smiling. I returned an awkward smile and wondered where to start.

         "So you're Australian, hm? That's cool."

         I wanted to facepalm at how ridiculous I sounded. Of course she was Australian! Ethan already told me that and she literally had an accent! What was I thinking?

         Alycia suppressed the urge to laugh as she nodded. "Yes, I am. From Sydney actually."

         "That's really cool."

         Her eyes flickered to the table as she smiled. "Yeah, you already said that."

         I felt my cheeks grow warm as I also looked down at the table. "Right..."

         It was quiet between us for a moment and I was unprepared for the somersaults in my stomach and the bundle of nerves eating away at me. What was happening to me?

         "So how long have you and Ethan been together?"

         I looked up and saw her sitting up straighter, a newfound confidence having taken over.

         "Erm, well, about a year," I answered, suddenly feeling weird about talking about Ethan. "What about you and Levi?"

         Alycia pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "Same. We met when he moved to Australia temporarily for work. I found a job opportunity here and so did he, so we decided to move together."

         I nodded, leaning forward with interest. "What is it that you do?"

         A toothless smile appeared on her lips. "I'm a drama teacher... how about you?"

         "Wow, that sounds pretty fun," I said, before chuckling. "My job sounds kinda sucky now." She laughed and my stomach flipped at the sound. "I work for a marketing company."

         "Ah, that's not that sucky!" she tried to reassure, and I could only find it in myself to laugh at how cute she sounded. "I'm sure it's fun."

         I shrugged. "Sometimes. Maybe. Kind of... Not really."

         She laughed again and I smiled at the sound. I wanted to make her laugh all the time – that sound was intoxicating.

         "Honestly speaking," she said once she'd finished laughing, "I wasn't too keen on coming today."

         I raised an eyebrow, suddenly intrigued. "Oh?"

         She shrugged and smiled. "I don't know... Levi had been talking about meeting Ethan for weeks now. He even mentioned you a few times, but I just wasn't feeling it. Of course I didn't tell him that... I wasn't sure what I'd find."

         "What do you mean?" I asked, furrowing my brows, not looking away from her.

         She leaned back into her seat. "I don't know. I guess, well, I don't know anybody here in L.A. so I was mostly distracted by the idea of fitting in somewhere new. What I would find here."

         I nodded to show I was listening. Her voice was soft and it carried beautifully against the pitter-patter of the rain on the window.

         "I'm glad I did come though," she said, giving me a pointed look with her bright emeralds. "You seem interesting. I'm looking forward to getting to know you."

         A smile formed on my lips. "And I you, Alycia."

         The meet up wasn't something I had particularly been looking forward to, but later that afternoon, when Ethan was dropping me off to my flat, I was glad to have gone. Something about meeting the green-eyed girl sent butterflies in my stomach.

         "I appreciate you coming to meet Levi and his girlfriend, Y/N," Ethan thanked me as I grabbed some water from the fridge. "It means a lot."

         I cracked a smile as I settled on the stool before him. "Of course."

         He suddenly smiled enthusiastically. "What did you think of Alycia? I figured you guys would get on and it seemed so."

         A warm feeling spread throughout me and I couldn't help but smile for real at the thought of Alycia.

         "She's really nice," I said, looking down to my bottle. "A great person."

         "Yeah," he agreed. "She doesn't have many friends since she's just moved here and all. Levi and I thought it'd be nice of you both to meet. Did you get her number?"

         I nodded, remembering the exchange of numbers we had during our chat. It had happened so smoothly, not like a crinkle in conversation. I couldn't wait to text to her.

         "Cool, cool... well, thanks again..." He cleared his throat and stood up, rounding the island to stand close to me. "You sure you don't wanna spend the night at mine? We could have some fun..." He smirked playfully as he wrapped his arms around my waist.

         I smiled, though the thought of being intimate with Ethan made my head hurt. It had been a month – probably a little less, since we'd been intimate. I couldn't keep this up anymore though, I knew I'd have to break it off soon. But how? Maybe it was just a temporary thing. Maybe I'd fall back in love.

         "I'm kinda tired actually," I half-lied, pulling away from his arms and offering an apologetic smile. "Maybe next time, yeah?"

         He nodded and I could see him rolling his shoulders back, trying not to let my comment offend him.

         "Of course. You should get some rest. If you need anything, just call. Yeah?"

         I nodded and smiled as I kissed his cheek softly. "I'll talk later, Ethan."

         He nodded and offered a small smile before leaving. Only when I heard the door shut did I release a deep breath. One hand grasping the island, the other massaging my temple, I closed my eyes. I couldn't keep lying like this. It was wrong.

         I opened my eyes when I heard the text tone on my phone go off. I reached for it from the counter and saw my screen lit up with a text message. From Alycia.

         Alycia: Hey, how does lunch sound tomorrow? :)

         I didn't have time to register how I felt because my phone vibrated as another text came through.

         Alycia: Unless you're busy, which is totally cool. It's pretty soon of me to text isn't? We literally just met

         I stifled a smile as I opened up the conversation. Going to lunch with her didn't sound terrible at all. My phone vibrated again.

         Alycia: I just thought we could talk more, without the guys, but it's cool if you don't wanna

         To save her from overthinking, I typed back a response, unable to stop the grin on my lips.

         Me: I would love to, Alycia. I know this great café nearby! I'll text you tomorrow with the details?

         She replied instantly.

         Alycia: Oh, awesome! I guess I'll see you tomorrow :)

         Hanging out with Alycia started to become a frequent thing as time passed. I helped her settle in to her new flat (which she shared with Levi...) and showed her around all the local hotspots – so pretty much the nearest Target and McDonald's. We did become pretty good friends, but that overwhelming boat of feelings would just hit me whenever she did something cute or touched me platonically.

         I was pretty sure I was falling in love with her, and I wasn't sure how to feel about that. How could I be falling for someone so quickly when I was in a relationship? A relationship with a guy who I couldn't fall in love with? I tried to convince myself that these feelings would pass and possibly extend to Ethan rather than Alycia, but I was kidding myself.

         And I was sure she felt the same. She just had to be. Unless I was imagining those longing stared she'd send my way, or the extra mile she went just to be close to me. It was terrible for us to be like this when we were both in relationships. But I couldn't help but think that it was supposed to be like this.

         It never really came to light until one afternoon. Alycia and I had gone out to watch a film and she had dropped me off home, following me inside because she needed to use the bathroom.

         "I did ask if you needed to go when the film ended," I teased, pulling my keys from my bag.

         She rolled her eyes playfully. "I didn't need it then!"

         I laughed and she joined in, sending a whirl of my butterflies in my stomach. We neared my flat when I saw a woman knocking on my door.

         "Mum?"

         The woman turned and it proved to be my mother when she smiled my way. "Y/N!"

         I smiled in surprise as I pulled her in for a quick hug. "How long have you been waiting here for?"

         She waved her hand dismissively. "Not long, don't worry."

         I nodded and realised that Alycia was just standing behind me, an awkward smile on her lips.

         "Uh, Alycia, this is my mum, Y/M/N," I introduced, before looking to my mum. "Mum, this is Alycia, my friend."

         "Hello, darling," my mum greeted, pulling her in for a surprise hug.

         I stifled a laugh as I saw how taken aback Alycia was. She glared at me playfully before the two separated.

         "Let's get inside," I mumbled, going to open my door.

         "It's lovely to meet you, Mrs. Y/L/N," I heard Alycia say from behind me. I opened the door and the three of us walked in.

         "You're not from here," my mum commented vaguely, making me laugh because she was always so dozy with obvious things.

         "What gave that away, mum, the accent?" I asked sarcastically. I approached the two at the kitchen island, watching as my mum went pink with slight embarrassment.

         "Oh, be quiet you," she said, feigning annoyance, before looking to Alycia with a smile.

         I kept my eyes on Alycia as she watched my mum with concentration, a polite smile on her lips. God, she was so beautiful. She was wearing her glasses today and she looked so good in them.

         "What I meant to say is where are you from?" my mum amended her comment.

         Alycia chuckled. "Australia, and I don't mean to be rude, but I really need to use the bathroom." She glanced at me and I laughed when I realised that was the point in her coming in.

         "Oh, sorry, darling, go on!" my mum exclaimed, making Alycia smile appreciatively before leaving for the bathroom. She sent me an embarrassed smile, to which I laughed at, before leaving the kitchen.

         "She's a lovely girl," my mum said as I took a seat at the island. "When did you guys meet?"

         I chewed on my lip as I tried to remember how long it had been. "Give or take a few months."

         My mum nodded, helping herself to some water from the fridge. "So are you still with Ethan?"

         I nodded, though an emptiness came over me as he was mentioned. "Yeah, why d'you ask?"

         She shrugged as she settled by the counter, her bottle in hand. "I just haven't seen him in a while, I thought you guys may have broken up. There's also the fact that you've been giving heart eyes to Alycia."

         My eyes widened and I looked around, hoping Alycia wasn't out just yet.

         "Mum! Firstly, Alycia might hear you so be quieter!" I whisper-shouted urgently. "Also, did you just say heart eyes?"

         My mum laughed as if I'd said the funniest thing ever. "Look, all I'm saying is it seems to me that you like this girl. And if you choose to go forward with that, that's fine, but do right by Ethan."

         "Mum, that's not how it is," I tried to argue, but even I didn't believe me. "We're just friends and–"

         I instantly went quiet when I heard the sound of the bathroom door closing. Alycia walked back into the kitchen and a confused smile fell on her lips as she realised it was quiet.

         "Sorry, did I interrupt something?" she asked and giggled adorably.

         "Er, no," I lied, plastering a smile on my face. "Just catching up."

         She nodded and approached my mum. "Well, unfortunately I should get going, but it was a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Y/L/N."

         "Call me Y/M/N, please," my mum said, and nodded before pulling Alycia in for another hug. "It was lovely to meet you, too. Hopefully I'll see you soon!"

         Alycia smiled with confusion and cocked her head to the side. I internally facepalmed and my mum merely chuckled.

         "Today was really fun," Alycia said, her voice quieter as she came towards me. A beautiful smile graced her lips as she pulled me in for a hug. I couldn't help but smile as my arms wrapped around her slender waist. I tried to ignore the suggestive eyebrows my mum was raising from behind.

         "Yeah, it was," I agreed, pulling away, our hands trailing down each other's forearms and fingertips touching. Her eyes met mine and I found it difficult to breathe because of how bright and enticing they were.

         "I'll talk to you later," she muttered, smiling toothlessly before letting go and leaving out the front door.

         I breathed out slowly, still unable to shake that rush she gave me whenever she was close to me. I'd almost forgotten my mum was there until she laughed from her side.

         "Gosh, you're in trouble," she commented, and I couldn't help but think, maybe she was right.

         The visit from my mum really brought attention to how intense my feelings for Alycia were. And her comment, do right by Ethan... she was absolutely right. I couldn't be with him when I felt something for someone else.

         What really pushed me to plan the perfect time to break up with him was when I was going to visit Ethan at work to drop off some lunch. He was in his office and his assistant let me right up since she knew who I was. I was about to knock on, but I could hear his conversation through the door and my nosy side came out.

         "I just don't think Alycia likes me like that anymore." It was Levi. Why was he here?

         "C'mon, man, I doubt that," Ethan replied, trying to reassure his friend.

         "No, I'm serious," Levi said, sounding upset. "She's just– she doesn't like me like that anymore. I can feel it. We haven't even had sex in what, two months? Two months, Ethan! Is that even normal?"

         I chewed on my lower lip as I listened in. God, it was so wrong of me to be happy about that, but it also made me feel relieved. She didn't like Levi? Maybe there was a chance?

         No. That wasn't right of me to think. But I knew that thought was hanging around...

         "Dude, listen," Ethan settled, and I could hear him sighing. "Y/N and I haven't exactly been doing so well in that department either..."

         I frowned at how sad he sounded. I was leading him on and I knew it, and just hearing how fed up he sounded made me feel immensely guilty. I promised myself that I would break up with him this week. Anytime, soon, this week. I had to.

         I knocked on the door before opening it slightly, a small smile on my lips. "Anyone hungry?"

***

         I knew exactly what I was going to say to Ethan, but I also knew that in that moment, I'd forget everything I'd rehearsed. Knowing I could make it sound horrible was worrying me, so I decided to get my mind off things. Alycia had asked me to go shopping with her the following day, so that's where I found myself.

         "Trying on the clothes is by far the best part of shopping," Alycia said, a grin on her lips.

         I laughed at how cute she was, feeling those familiar butterflies. We were going to the changing rooms and she was more excited than one would usually be to try on clothes.

         "Yeah, yeah, loser, just go on," I said, giving her a teasing smile.

         She chuckled and got in the changing room, waiting by the curtain. I got in the one opposite her, turning to shut my curtain. She grinned again before pulling her curtain closed. I rolled my eyes playfully and shut my own. This was proving to be a wonderful distraction from my own problems.

         "Ooh, you were right about that top, Y/N!" I heard Alycia say excitedly from her side. "Look!"

         I opened my curtain as she did and smiled impressively. "I have pretty good taste if I do say so myself," I joked, which made her roll her eyes playfully. "Honestly though, you look really good."

         She bit her lip to contain her smile. "Thank you. Now try on those shorts I chose for you!"

         I laughed and closed my curtain, doing as she said. I looked in the mirror, nodding with agreement, before calling for Alycia. We were lucky the changing rooms were empty otherwise I could only imagine the complaints we would get from other customers.

         "Yes! I love those and you look so good in them," she complimented, her eyes looking me up and down. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't blushing at her stare.

         "Thanks," I said awkwardly, before closing my curtain. God, why did she always have this effect on me?

         "I'm not too sure about this one, Y/N, what do you think?" she called after a few more outfit changes.

         I opened my curtain as she did and had to refrain from physically dropping my jaw. She was wearing a black dress that managed to hug her curves in all the right place. She was absolutely stunning and I swear my heart was beating out of my chest.

         "Y-you look really good," I got out, unable to meet her eyes. "Um, you should get it..."

         She pursed her lips and looked in the mirror beside her. "I don't know... do you think?"

         I breathed out slowly before nodding. I finally looked up to her. "Totally, Alycia, would I lie?"

         She looked back to me and raised an eyebrow playfully. "I don't know, would you?"

         I smiled at her expression. "No, I wouldn't. You should buy it, seriously."

         She nodded, a toothy smile on her face. "Okay, I'll get it. But only because you said so."

         I stifled a laugh as she stared longingly my way. I licked my lips and quickly shut the curtain, trying to get her haunting green eyes out of my head.

         I got out of the clothes I was going to buy and back into my own when I called for Alycia. "You ready?"

         "Uhhh..."

         I quirked an eyebrow and pulled open my curtain, seeing hers was still closed.

         "You okay in there, Leashy?" I asked, suppressing a smile.

         I heard her chuckle nervously. "Kinda... I may or may not need your help to get out of this dress."

         I shook my head with amusement and slipped in through her curtain. She had the dress pulled up to her waist and I couldn't help but laugh at her troubled expression.

         "As you can see, my hair is caught in the zipper," she pointed out, giving me a knowing look.

         I moved forward and motioned for her to turn around. "It would've helped if you fastened it first, wouldn't it?"

         "Indeed, it would have," she agreed, making me smile.

         I gently pulled her hair from her zipper and she held it up and out of the way as I moved to pull the dress over her head. It came off with ease and she turned around, smiling cheekily and avoiding my eyes.

         "Wasn't so hard, was it?" I asked, a teasing smile on my lips.

         She sighed over-dramatically, making me laugh, and hung up the dress. The short silence of her response made me realise that she was stood there in her bra and jeans and I could feel my cheeks grow warm at the sight. I averted my gaze, but I wasn't sure where else to look.

         "Thanks," she finally spoke, grabbing her shirt from the peg and holding it in her hands.

         I finally met her eyes, about to dismiss myself and give her some privacy, but I felt stuck in place as her gaze peered right through me. Her eyes flickered from my eyes to my lips, half-lidded as she moved closer. I should have moved, knowing what was about to come. I knew it was wrong. But she was like a magnet, attracting me closer and closer and closer, until...

         Her lips pressed against mine hastily, yet softly. She dropped her shirt and rested a hand on my waist, pushing me back against the mirror, the other hand resting on my cheek. I closed my eyes and moved my lips in sync with hers, appreciating how gentle yet desperate her lips were. She was warm, careful, comfortable. Her body fit perfectly against mine and it sent the butterflies raging in my stomach. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't imagined what it would be like to kiss her. This was perfect, everything I thought it to be.

         And that's when I realised how wrong this was.

         I pushed her back reluctantly, opening my eyes, only to be submerged in her pools of green. We were both breathing heavily, trying to catch back our breath from that insane kiss. Woah.

         "I'm sorry," she said, letting go of me and stepping back. Realisation dawned on her. "God..."

         "Alycia–"

         She shook her head, holding her hand up as she tried to catch her thoughts. She bent down to pick up her shirt and pursed her lips.

         "We should get ready," she said, and turned around, making her perspective clear.

         I frowned guiltily and left her changing room, going to my own. I couldn't get the image of her being that close to me, the smell of her perfume in my nose, the touch of her delicate lips against mine, out of my head as we got ready and paid for our items. Today was supposed to get my mind off things, but it only made me realise how much I cared for Alycia.

         When we left the store, she suddenly spoke, the first since we'd left the changing rooms.

         "I just remembered, I have some things to do back home..."

         I could see that she was lying, only trying to back away and leave.

         "I can give you a ride," I tried, stepping forward, but she only stepped back.

         She visibly swallowed and avoided looking my way. "I'll be fine. I don't wanna stop you from shopping. See you, Y/N."

         I sighed as I watched her speed-walk away from me. God, why did things have to be so confusing?

         I ended up heading straight home after that, my brain having been fried from all the confusion. Ethan called me on my way back, which was the last thing I needed, but I answered anyway.

         "Hey, babe," his voice echoed into my car.

         I released a deep breath before saying, "Hey, Ethan. What's up?"

         "Just wanted to see how shopping with Alycia was!" he said, only reminding me of the pile of things I had to sort through mentally. "Levi told me you guys had a girl's day out! Is she with you?"

         "No, she's back at home now. But yeah, it was good," I lied, feeling even more guilty. How many lies had I told him now? Too many to count, no doubt.

         "That's good," he said. "Well, anyway, I'm at yours, waiting for you. Thought we could hang out this evening?"

         I just wanted to be alone, but I couldn't exactly say that, so I sighed. "Okay, Ethan, I'll see you in ten minutes."

         He seemed excited, which only pressed the guilt I felt because I knew I needed to break up with him. "Awesome! See you, babe."

         I said my goodbyes and groaned as I drove home in silence, thinking about how I was going to deal with everything.

         When I headed through my front door, Ethan was there instantly, taking bags from my hands and setting them down. He pulled me in for a hug and I noticed how hard and uncomfortable it seemed compared to Alycia's smaller frame.

         "I missed you," he said, leaning down to kiss my cheek. He stayed there, sniffing the air. "Is that a new perfume?"

         I widened my eyes when he pulled back. Crap, was that Alycia's?

         "Levi picked something similar for Alycia not long ago," he said dismissively, oblivious to my panic. "If you like it, I can get you it."

         I scratched my head awkwardly. "Erm, yeah, Alycia was showing it me today when we were shopping. I wasn't really fond of it though."

         Ethan shrugged. "Eh, fair point."

         I was grateful for how oblivious he was, but it also made me realise how much of a cheater I was. God, I was the worst. I needed to end this. But first, I needed to fix things with Alycia. She was plaguing my thoughts and I had to see how she felt about me. That was eating away at me as much as this whole breakup thing was.

***

         I found myself knocking on Alycia's flat door a week later. I knew Levi was hanging out with Ethan so this was my opportunity to fix things between us. She'd been avoiding my calls and texts all week and I couldn't stop thinking about her and the moment we shared. I needed to talk to her.

         She didn't answer straight away, but I could hear her on the other side of the door. She was probably looking through the peep hole, debating whether or not to let me in. I only hoped she would.

         After what felt like forever, the door finally opened and I was met with Alycia's glowing eyes.

         "Hey," she got out, her eyes suddenly darting to the floor nervously.

         I felt butterflies in my stomach at her presence. Still, I was unable to contain my feelings.

         "Hey," I greeted in return, my voice cracking nervously. I cleared my throat and continued, "Um, I haven't been able to reach you lately."

         Alycia visibly gulped and nodded her head, still not meeting my eyes. "Yeah, sorry about that, I was busy..."

         I could see she was lying, but nonetheless, I nodded. "Erm, it's okay, but I was hoping we could talk some things out. About, well, y'know..."

         She breathed in deeply and nodded before stepping to the side to let me in. I walked in and noticed how she still wouldn't look at me. I felt shivers on my arm as I walked past her, catching a whiff of her perfume – the one she wore the day we kissed.

         "Would you like anything to drink? Eat?" she asked politely as I sat on the couch.

         "No, Alycia," I said, staring at her. I knew she was stalling.

         She merely nodded and took a seat on the couch, but left a large gap between us. I understood why she was acting like this, but I wasn't sure what it meant. Did she think our kiss was a mistake?

         "Look, I'm going to get right to it," I began, growing uncomfortable at her lack of attention. "I think you like me as more than a friend."

         This caught her attention and she suddenly looked up, her green emeralds widening ever so slightly.

         "And I like you too," I added, softly.

         Alycia's eyes darted around the room hurriedly, as if she was trying to collect her thoughts. "Y/N, this can't... we can't... this is wrong."

         I frowned slightly. "I know. We shouldn't have done that to Ethan and Levi. But that's a separate problem for the moment. I need to know how you feel."

         Alycia's eyes met mine and she shook her head. "Y/N, I shouldn't have kissed you, okay? I shouldn't have done that to Will. I– I cheated."

         She looked down to her hands, and I saw how terrible she looked. She felt guilty for what happened and I didn't blame her, because I felt it, too.

         "You like me and I like you," I stated. "I feel like something was always supposed to happen between us. Don't you?"

         She pursed her lips, her eyes flickering to mine momentarily. They were agreeing with me, even if she verbally wasn't.

         "I've been thinking about breaking up with Ethan for a long time now," I told her honestly. "Since before I met you, Alycia. It just wasn't working out. And I know things haven't been the best between you and Levi. And I guess I'm just thinking, what if we ended up with the wrong people?"

         She ran her hands though her hair and sighed quietly. "I can't just break up with him, Y/N. It's not that easy. I share this flat with him to start with. Things will be messy and I can't just leave him because I might love someone else. It's not fair to him."

         Despite her obvious hurting, I couldn't stop myself from smiling slightly. She said she might have loved me and it made my stomach flip upside down.

         "You might love me?"

         She tensed up when she realised her slip up, but said nothing.

         "You can't stay with someone to keep them happy when you aren't happy yourself," I said, not looking away for even a second. "It's not fair to either of you. And the flat shouldn't be an issue. You can stay with me until you find a new place. I can help you out, Alycia. And maybe we can sort things out between us on the way. What do you say?"

         She genuinely looked like she was debating my offer. Her eyes looked to mine and I finally felt like I could see how she felt for me. I wanted to be with her, and obviously I had to do the right thing and break things off with Ethan, but it would be worth it if I could finally be happy and have Alycia.

         "I can't do that to him, Y/N, I'm sorry," she finally spoke, and any hope I had died away. "We should just stay friends."

         I tilted my head to the side and looked away. Nodding, I bit my lip and thought things through. She had feelings for me but couldn't be with me. Alright, okay, I could deal with this. Right?  

         "Okay," I agreed, knowing I wanted her in my life as a friend rather than nothing at all. "As friends, can I stay here to hang out?"

         I glanced at her and she was chewing on her lower lip.

         "Yeah, sure," she agreed. "Only platonic feelings between us. Agreed?"

         I nodded and sat back in my seat, mumbling, "Okay, but it was you who kissed me."

         Her face grew warm as an embarrassed smile fell upon her lips. Sinking in the couch beside me, she grabbed the TV remote and turned on the TV.

         I stayed and the two of us watched a film together. I wasn't even sure what we were watching because Alycia's presence was too distracting. I caught myself staring at her, too enthralled with how beautiful she looked. She was dressed so simply, her hair in a loose bun and no makeup on, yet she managed to take my breath away.

         Not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable however, I tried to concentrate on the film, whatever it was. But suddenly, Alycia sighed loudly.

         "Y/N, when did this happen?" she asked, and I looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

         "What are you talking about?"

         She gave me a knowing look and glanced down at our apparent intertwined hands. Hm, when did that happen? I didn't recall grabbing her hand in the first place. The feeling of it in mine felt so perfect it made no difference.

         "Really? Because I can remember agreeing that this would be platonic yet–"

         I couldn't stop myself and before I knew it, I had leaned forward and pressed my lips against hers. She went quiet and instantly moved forward, her lips moving against mine. The kiss was sensational and I felt shivers down my spine as she rested a hand on my cheek and her other hand on my thigh. We pulled away for a quick breath but I moved forward and caught her lips in mine again, unable to be away from her for a second longer. She was addicting and warm and everything like the other day, except this was kiss was less rushed and more meaningful.

         This time, it was me who pulled away, but I kept ahold of her jaw, not moving away from her fully.

         "I'm sorry..," I breathed out. "I know we agreed to be friends, literally half an hour ago, but I couldn't help it."

         I watched as Alycia clenched her jaw slightly, it tensing under my hand. She pursed her lips and glanced down, before moving back and making me drop my hand to my side.

         "I... I want to be with you."

         My heart raced faster as she looked up and met my eyes with confident ones. She said the words I so desperately needed to hear.

         "Then let's do this," I spoke, smiling a little. I took a leap of faith and reached out for her hand. She let me. "We can do what's right. Break up with Ethan and Levi. Then let's do this for real, Alycia."

         She seemed uncertain as she looked down at our intertwined hands.

         "Okay," she agreed, and I didn't expect it, so it almost went right over me.

         "Yeah?"

         She nodded, looking up again. "Yeah."

         I breathed out with relief, a lovesick smile on my lips. "Yeah."

         "We'll do the right thing as soon as possible," she said, a serious tone suddenly taking over her voice. "It's what's fair on the boys."

         "Agreed." I nodded, knowing she was right.

         "But for now..."

         I furrowed my brows, wondering what else needed to be done, but that confusion was short-lived as she moved forward and captured my lips in hers, stirring the butterflies in my stomach for the third time in a kiss now.

         Her lips were addictive, I knew that much, and as she kissed me there and then, I couldn't help but feel an overwhelming amount of happiness.

         Maybe, just maybe, Cupid shot his arrows the wrong way.

[tempestaurora]

endgame opinions

spoilers under the cut. i’ve opened my dms so feel free to come and scream/yell/cry/whatever with me. this turned out really long because i start speculating half way through as well as talking about opinions.

let’s start with harley keener, my son, who was literally only in the movie for a second, at the fucking funeral. are you kidding me. and a lot of people don’t know what ty simpkins looks like now?? so even my friend didn’t know who he was until i started physically vibrating in my seat

HOWEVER, he and peter are in the same location, which totally opens up a plausible reason for them to know each other, become best friends/brothers/roommates at MIT

it’s sad that it was just him standing alone though, like no one stood with him, like his mother or anyone. that’s sad.

i wrote a harley keener infinity war fic so like,, feel free to read that to get the harley keener endgame feelings we DESERVE

aNYWAY, good film

i enjoyed it a lot for the most part, like i have so few complaints its unreal

it’s a genuinely funny film that didn’t feel like it was shoehorning in comedic relief, but like the movie was SUPPOSED to be lighter and funnier and drama was happening in between

i didn’t care for the ending in the slightest fuck that

i’m pissed about being lied to by the directors about a canon gay character. they sat up there on their high horses, congratulating themselves for a job well done for diversity, when it was just a fucking extra with no name, referring to a male partner twice. that’s it. you’re fucking kidding me if you think that’s diversity, if the russos truly think that was worth getting our hopes up for.

you know who could’ve been confirmed lgbt? valkyrie. steve. bucky. tony. (and no, tony appreciating steve’s ass doesn’t confirm our bi father, son and holy spirit on screen, unfortunately.)

that’s a fucking joke, russos. i hope they’re fucking ashamed of that.

(i really was watching that final bucky/steve scene and hoping for some hint of, it was always you, you know and got fucking nothing. i barely even ship stucky and i know that it should’ve been them)

the clint/natasha fight on vormir was the best scene, hands down. there’s no competition here. it was the best moment of the film, and despite my annoyance at the russos seeing that the audience didn’t appreciate gamora dying to further a man’s arc, and then fucking doing it again, i really did like that scene

i figured nat was gonna die but i didn’t think i’d actually be sad about it

as soon as they said they were going to vormir i knew the fight would happen and it lived up to every expectation and some

the barton home cold open was fantastic

why the ever loving FUCK was carol danvers so forcefully advertised to us?????? why were we told over and over and over that carol was gonna kill thanos, that she was gonna save the day, that the avengers literally had zero chance without her????? she had four minutes of screentime what the fuck

i appreciate her and peter’s interaction though that was cute and he was wrecked

the peter/tony reunion was cute af, glad they finally got their hug

also, i always wanted peter to call him tony but like that???? nah

side note, don’t remember in the slightest what rhodey and peter said as tony died because i was sitting there going, he’s not actually gonna die, obviously, that’s not gonna happen, they’re gonna make us think he will and then he’ll come back so i missed both their goodbyes

i know it was a 3 hour film but there was space for... more. there should’ve been more. where was rocket and groot’s reunion? where was bucky and steve’s?

where did valkyrie get a fucking pegasus from

bruce and hulk’s new system is hilarious but the fact that he dabbed pains me

bruce wielding the gauntlet was so incredibly left field i loved it, like no one guessed that he’d be the one to bring everyone back. no one

scott did great

i’m not sure if i can settle myself with this five year time jump for a whole host of reasons

1. do we have, officially, a new cassie lang actress? is our iconic abby ryder fortson leaving us for an older actress???

2. far from home takes place, supposedly, a week after endgame. it was one of the reasons i believed tony wouldn’t die, because it seems like a wholly upbeat film - and y’all saw his face at the funeral, he was fucking gone - and it’s even been confirmed to be lighter and funnier, so there better be some fucking low blow that takes peter out on the tony front (but did the writers/directors even know tony had died when they made the film? will it be ignored altogether?) back to the main point:

2a. it’s around the year 2023 and as soon as the entire world comes back, there’s a two week field trip to europe that peter and all his classmates have somehow paid for, signed permission slips for, and arranged, despite the fact that they’ve all been dead for five years. and i mean all. literally the entire main cast of spiderman is still in peter’s class, they haven’t grown up and moved on. the entire fucking cast got dusted.

3. we didn’t really get to see tony and steve make up??? they kinda just brushed over everything

i almost cried seeing ned leeds and peter reunite

okay now the biggies:

i’m Not Okay with tony stark dying

i’m not

it’s not just that he’s my favourite character and i care about him above all others, it’s that his entire arc has been about first, accountability, and second, leaving the fight. yes, it’s also got a lot of heart motifs and mentions of sacrifice too. i understand that. but tony has been wrestling with his father’s legacy and the kind of father he’ll be since day one.

he deserved his happy ending.

not just five years. not just a daughter who will know OF him but not know him, who’ll forget the short time of memories she has in due course. he deserved to grow old with his daughter and his wife and the kid whose photo he placed on the shelf in the kitchen, where he could see it every day.

he does deserve rest. but he deserves the kind of rest where he’s alive.

i have said before that if tony stark dies, i stop watching the mcu, and tbh, might actually go through with it. i don’t know if i really want to watch the films, knowing he’s gone? (and that they could’ve used either the time stone, or, you know, their time travel machine, to go two weeks back, grab that tony and bring him into the present. say, hey, you died, but now you can keep living.)

and steve.

oh steve.

i love steve rogers, i do. i absolutely adore steve rogers. but i’m about the same level of angry about his ending as i am about tony’s.

and honestly? it’s only because it’s not him. it’s not the him we know. my friend said that cap went and settled down because he’d finally learnt the lesson tony had been teaching; that maybe there is a reason to set down the shield and live a quiet, good life. but i don’t like it. it opens time anomalies, inconsistencies. it doesn’t feel like him.

since cap came into the 21st century, his story line has had a motif of moving on. about getting with the times, learning new music, new references, finding old friends and having to decide whether he should hold onto them and risk what he has now, or let them go. he’s been staring at a photo of peggy carter since 2011, he made peace with her life when he visited her in hospital, he let her go when she died. he watched her, through her office window, be director of shield, knowing she was about to have a life that she loved. she has children, a family. 

it doesn’t feel like the steve rogers i know to take that away from her

but at the same time, i understand that sometimes, he should get to be a little selfish. he was selfish when it came to protecting bucky over all else, and it ended with mixed results.

i loved the final scene, of he and peggy dancing and kissing, but i think i would’ve loved that scene just as much, if not more, if it had happened in the afterlife. with an about time from peggy.

on the same subject: bucky and sam.

i’m super happy with sam being the next captain america (does this mean we’ve been lied to about the whole falcon and winter soldier tv show? is it actually a captain america and winter soldier show?)

i think bucky knew what steve’s plans were, though it would’ve been nice to have some on-screen confirmation. i think that’s why he seemed relieved that steve was sitting on the bench; he knew what steve was going to do and was glad he’d lived long enough to pass the torch once and for all

HOWEVER, the time anomalies i mentioned:

peggy carter’s established timeline is broken

does sharon carter exist? if yes, does this timeline’s steve rogers still make out with her

if steve goes into the past, the steve that he already was and his whole existence in the 21st century will still happen. that means he’ll look for peggy. that means he’ll find her. with him. in the future/present. steve is therefore made aware of the future - would that then effect how he acts with civil war/infinity war etc? would that then erase the events that happened, limiting steve from going back?

does he tell anyone that hydra is in shield

does he get bucky the fuck out of hydra or does he let his best friend be tortured for 70 years

i think bucky should’ve been a part of the sam/captain america torch conversation. if only because steve’s narrative has focused around bucky since 2011 and it ends with a don’t do anything stupid while i’m gone / you’re taking all the stupid with you - that’s not a satisfactory ending lads

much of me thinks steve and tony’s outcomes should’ve been switched. tony wants a quiet life, steve has said many times that he can’t imagine giving up the fight, living as a civilian in obscurity. i think it’s a cruel way to end it.

plus steve is ALWAYS the one making speeches about sacrifice, but he’s never the one to actually make the sacrifice. it’s always tony.

i’m happy for steve, i am.

i think i’d just be happier if morgan could grow up with her father and if pepper wasn’t a single parent and peter didn’t have to navigate the rest of his life - super powered and not - alone

side note, far from home taking place a week after endgame: nick fury wasted no fucking time jumping on spiderman. like, tony absolutely protected him from fury before infinity war, and the dude’s barely buried and fury’s making his move on peter - not cool

anyway, i genuinely did enjoy the film. i find it incredibly difficult to believe this was shot immediately after infinity war because the tone is so different, and i was remembering all those photos we had from reshoots and realised none of those scenes made it in the final cut. 

it was a good film. probably the most emotionally mature of the mcu. not my favourite. i’m angry about the ending. nebula should’ve killed thanos at least once. cool that gamora’s back. sad about nat. devastated about tony. happy for steve on the surface, until i spend 2 seconds looking deeper. loki’s probably alive because the timeline changed and they replaced the tesseract in 1970, not 2012, so officially, loki never goes to asgard jail anymore

but for real: how does steve replace the tesseract in the past when it’s now the space stone? how does he get that past anyone at all?

edit: I SOMEHOW forgot about rescue, the moment i’ve been waiting for for a decade

i love her, i love the suit, i love the pepper was incredibly badass with it with zero hesitation. i wish someone had said the name rescue like i wish someone had said captain marvel - but no dice. it’s such a rad suit and seeing her and tony fight side by side was so cool

edit 2 bc im a dumbass: CLINT MY ARROW BOY I LOVE YOU, YOU GOT ALL THE SCREENTIME U FUCKIN DESERVED

[miasswier]

miasswier’s ultimate glee ranking: no 24

24: I Do

Written by: Ian Brennan Directed by: Brad Falchuk

Overall Thoughts: This one is a tough one to rank, mostly because the parts that I love I love so goddamn much, but the parts that annoy me annoy me so goddamn much. It’s pretty high up on the list because, objectively, it’s a really strong episode. It’s smack-dab in the middle of the strongest set of episodes in season four (lasting from “Sadie Hawkins” to “Guilty Pleasures”), and has really good entertainment value, while also showing a fantastic portrayal of the difficulties of living with mental illness. I originally had it higher on the list than I do now, but I re-watched it again and ugh, seriously, the parts of this episode I dislike drag it down so goddamn much. Still, it’s really strong, and it has some of my favourite moments in all of Glee history.

What I Like:

Finn telling Rachel that not everything is about her. What I like most about this moment is that it’s true. It’s not just Finn telling Rachel that to ~conceal his true feelings or whatever. Him kissing Emma legitimately had nothing to do with Rachel.

Okay, this whole storyline annoys the fuck out of me, but the scene before Jake and Marley sing their duet is pretty funny. It’s too bad they didn’t give Ryder more of a chance to be funny, because Blake Jenner has fantastic comedic timing.

Kurt and Blaine making out in the backseat of that car. Obviously.

“This is just bros helping bros.” “I love it when you talk fratty.” These two are the biggest fucking dorks.

“Tell me that’s not Tina again!”

Becky as the angry flower girl, throwing her petals with so much fucking force.

Jake calling Ryder out on his racist assumption that Jake would steal, or that Marley would assume Jake was stealing. As far as I remember there’s been no indication that Jake has ever actually committed a crime? He’s just lippy with teachers and sleeps with tons of girls and thinks that makes him a badass, but he isn’t a thief.

Jake and Marley not having sex. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: nobody can convince me that Marley wasn’t asexual. Still, I remember hearing the spoilers that five couples would go into hotel rooms and that four of those would be having sex and instantly hoping that Jake and Marley would be the ones that didn’t. I mean, Jake talks a big game about “taking it slow” but they’ve only been dating for four episodes, so that’s, what, a month? Maybe two? I’m glad that Marley didn’t let herself be pressured by the romantic gestures and such.

Santana raising her arms above her head while she follows Quinn into the hotel room. She’s so excited for the sex she’s about to have.

Honestly, Santana and Quinn in general in this episode. Everything about it is perfect, other than Quinn instantly shooting down the possibility of bisexuality, but my absolute favourite exchange is when Quinn tells Santana that the only non-gross guys are Will (ew) and Al Roker and Santana goes “Al Roker is disgusting, by the way.”

Seriously, though. Santana and Quinn had sex. Twice. That is a canonical thing that happened. I think about it every day tbh. God bless Glee.

Brittany taking pictures of Sue as she walks down the aisle and whispering “you look so good.”

“Oh, look, it’s the glee kids.”

Kurt very obviously hiding his boner behind his jacket as he gets out of the car, and Blaine’s adorable “oh my god.”

“You do realize how trashy blasphemous this is, right?” “Oh, come on Mercedes, everybody hooks up at weddings.”

Kurt pulling Blaine into the hotel room by the fucking tie.

I really enjoy the entire montage of couples post-sex (or post-not-sex, in the case of Jake and Marley). Obviously the Klaine scene is my favourite, but even the Artie/Betty scene is pretty cute. Also, Finn and Rachel’s scene is really heartbreaking in hindsight, since that’s the last time we see them on-screen together (in the same location, at least), and it’s the last kiss Rachel ever gives Finn.

Honestly, although it does annoy me in the context of the episode and in the context of when it aired, in hindsight the whole “we are endgame” speech is pretty sad. Hearing Finn talk about how he and Rachel are going to end up together, no matter what, is like a knife to the heart. Like, wow. There’s so much stuff on this show that in hindsight is just gutting.

That being said, it’s hilarious when Finn gives that whole pseudo-deep metaphor about seeds and Rachel just responds with “are you telling me you want to be a gardener?”

“Will Schuester is a weepy man-child whose greatest joy in life is singing with children. And his best friend? Nineteen.”

“Well, don't say that to Will Schuester. He'll have you singing a stripped down acoustic version of I Will Survive in a choir room full of teenagers with meaningful looks on their faces.”

Rachel telling Finn the honest truth that Emma running off has literally nothing to do with him. I’m glad that we’re at the point in the show where Finn making every woman in his life’s drama about himself is getting nipped in the bud.

Blaine and Kurt flanking Tina in red and white. They look like the angel and devil on her shoulders. Also, they’re totally going to make out during Showgirls.

The portrayal of Emma’s downward spiral over this episode and the previous one is so fantastic. Because it’s real. Here is a woman getting ready for what is supposed to be the happiest day of her life, and she’s just dreading it. Her anxiety gets worse and worse, and that just makes her OCD flare up even more-so than usual, and the result we get in the scene leading into “I’m (Not) Getting Married Today” is so wonderfully acted by Jayma Mays. I can think of very few TV shows who accurately dealt with this downside of mental illness: not even being able to enjoy the things that are supposed to bring you joy. Emma wants more than anything to marry Will, but she just can’t do it. It’s so raw, and emotional, and I’m so glad that we got to watch her perspective and not just Will and Finn’s. It’s just… god, I love that whole scene and that whole story. It’s just so goddamn real.

What I Don’t Like:

Mercedes calling Kurt and Blaine her “arm gays”. No thanks.

Okay, yeah, in hindsight the Finchel stuff is really sad, and I did tear up at a few of their scenes, but for fuck’s sake. It’s season four and we’re still dealing with this bullshit? They don’t have that much screen time, but it feels like every one of their scenes is never ending. And just exhausting. Plus, one of those scenes takes place while Kurt and Blaine are singing and I’ll never forgive Glee for that. Never.

In a similar vein, Artie and Betty have way too much screen time considering she was a one-episode character, and they also have a scene during Klaine’s song. It’s almost worse than the Finchel scene because it involves Artie literally annoying a girl into dancing with him via insulting her. She said no, bud. Leave her alone.

Jake/Marley/Ryder is SO ANNOYING OH MY GOD. Of all the annoying heterosexual bullshit I’m forced to put up with in this episode, theirs annoys me the most. First of all, we’re supposed to be rooting for Jake and Marley, but Glee is clearly showing us that Jake is the worst. But then Ryder kisses Marley, who is dating his best friend, so guess who just got added to the list of “the worst”? Seriously , why were these two the only two options given for Marley? She would have been way better off dating Unique.

I know this is a stupid, nitpicky thing, but I hate when Ryder says “she’s just a sophomore” about Marley, because I’m 98% sure that he and Jake are also sophomores, but this makes it sound like they’re both these mature adults or at least seniors, which just ends up making it seem creepy that these two guys are trying to get with this girl who they both clearly see as innocent and inexperienced, and seem to like all the more because of those qualities.

Again, one of the few episodes where I could accept Will having a lot of scenes, and he’s barely in it. Why does Glee always shove Will down my throat when I don’t want him, but hold back on him when he should actually be there? This is his goddamn wedding and he just got stood up. At least show him going to the honeymoon sweet in the hotel alone or something.

Another nitpicky thing but Mercedes isn’t at the reception and that makes me sad >:(

Songs:

You’re All I Need to Get By: I like the scene that comes before this, but the actual performance is boring, mostly because I do not give a rats ass about Jake and Marley. Also, it’s weird that Marley has solo lines in this. I would understand her singing along to some of it, but why is she singing parts by herself? She didn’t know this performance was happening!! HOW DID THEY CO-ORDINATE!!!

Getting Married Today: An awesome performance and amazing vocals by Jayma Mays. I love all of this except for the weird, floating Will Schuester head that is horribly green-screened to hove over Emma running away.

Just Can’t Get Enough: I really, really like this song. The performance, however, frustrates me. You barely see Kurt and Blaine! There are two scenes interjected in the song of straight couples talking, and almost all of the shots during the song are of straight people dancing. WE GET IT FOX! You didn’t want too much gay on your TV, and this episode already had two boys making out, and the implication of them having sex, as well as two girls having sex. Can’t let the boys actually be seen singing together after all that. (Seriously, though, the cover itself is fantastic).

We’ve Got Tonite: Despite my frustration with Finchel in this episode (and always), I really adore this song. It’s the last time they sing together, but even before it was that I still loved it. It’s slow, but sweet, and has fantastic emotion behind it. Plus, we haven’t had Finchel duets shoved down our throat for quite a while now, so I can appreciate how nice they sound together all the more-so. I also love the sneak-attack group song approach they took. Having everyone sing one line and then Finn and Rachel close it off was really clever and makes for a cool song and a great performance.

Anything Could Happen: This is a fun, upbeat song, and it’s a fun, upbeat scene, but honestly, it feels out of place. We aren’t at a fun, upbeat place when this episode ends. Rachel thinks she’s pregnant. Will can’t find Emma. Finn still feels guilty even though Rachel told him explicitly that it wasn’t his fault. Marley feels weird about Ryder kissing her (even though it wasn’t her fault!). The only storyline that really had a happy ending was the Klaine/Tina one (technically Artie/Betty too, but since we literally never see her again…), so I don’t know why this is suddenly all upbeat and happy. It feels like a really odd note to end such an emotional episode on.

Final Thoughts: I’ve always held this episode close to my heart. There is so much that happens in this episode that is so important to me (mostly Quinntana sexy times, but a lot of it is the Emma stuff too). Yeah, some of it annoys me, and the stuff that annoys me really annoys me, but it doesn’t outweigh all the awesome parts of this episode. Just, overall really strong and well-crafted. A+ Glee!

[boyf--riends]

review of Be More Chill!

i’m about to talk a lot about the show and the cast! if you don’t wanna read but you wanna hear about the talkback, the audio posts have just gone up and for those of you who want the review it’s under the cut!!!

- you can see jeremy violently pull down his pants before More Than Survive starts 

- the bus ride was so cute!! the actors jostled around like they were actually on a bus and it was super fun to watch even though it was literally only 5 seconds long

- the reason why chloe calls jeremy out is because he tried to sneakily snake his arm behind brooke to get to his locker and it looked like a weird pervy move

- rich walks straight into jeremy and we were blessed with “dOn’T TouCH Me TaLL aSs!!1!” and jeremy just stands there as rich violently scribbles on his back pack

- michael entered from the audience and accidentally hit my friend in the face with his backpack strap and did his lil marley jam session and the crowd went fucking nuts

- ”boyf. what does this mean?” jeremy turns around and so does michael so their bags read boyf riends and michael turned to jeremy and made kissy faces/noises the mom behind me violently whispered “what the hell is a boyf” tbh its a mood 

- jake lifts christine up in all her glory to sign up for the play and tbh,, i aspire to be that extra

- I LOVE PLAY REHEARSAL HOLY SHIT

- christine is so excited the whole time and god did her actress fucking kill the part

- when jake talks to christine it was pretty obvious he was nervous but tried to play cool and i really liked that

- two player game started and i shit you not the person in front of me started crying

- jeremy does not like to talk to his dad or about his mom

- “im your favowite pewson” michael nuzzles jeremys shoulder and jeremy shoves him off and he dramatically falls on top of the bean bags

- they had two of the ensemble actors as the payless employees and it was kinda weird but i went with it

- when they said it was top secret stuff michael was behind jeremy taking pictures of the stuff inside the box and it was super funny

-i thought jeremy picked out some kinda unisex blue v-neck ladies shirt not a sparkly pink tube top what the fuck

- “BecauSe SHe chEaTEd on MEeeEEEeeee” he rolled on the ground so fucking dramatically

- Do You Wanna Ride made 89% of the audience so uncomfortable but everyone went wild when brooke went “pi-i-i-i-i-i-i-ink beeeeerrryyyyy”

- jeremy’s voice cracked when he said everything about him made he wanna die and the squip turned the whole thing around but he kept that evil smirk on his face the whole damn time

- jeremy sleep singing Be More Chill while being carried to his bed and getting tucked in was so cute dont make me mention the “sleep tight slugger” bc my heart broke

- chloe totally psychs out christine before Guy That I’d Kinda Be Into and when jeremy enters christine pulls out of that whole funk and it was super freaking cute

- whenever christine does anything jeremy looks so love sick its adorable

- when christine said jake you could see physical pain on jeremy’s face before he grabbed his stuff and ran out

- brooke and jeremy had sex during upgrade (he comes out from backstage after making out with brooke, buttoning up his pants an smoothing out his shirt) and i was so fucking SHOOK 

- michael looked so angry and hurt but he got all excited when he figured out the squip worked but jeremy just stood there and didn’t even move to go after michael

- THE LIGHT WAS SHINING ON MICHAEL WHEN HE ASKED IF JEREMY WAS COMING THEN THE LIGHT WENT OUT AND ALL YOU COULD SEE WAS THE SQUIPS LIGHT NEXT TO JEREMY AFTER HE SAYS OPTIC NERVE BLOCKING: ON

- the costumes for halloween made me nut holy shit the barking unicorn was my favorite

-after the song is over rich is the only one still on stage and he’s twitching and repeating “halloween” over and over again until he walks off stage

- brooke was so excited to see jeremy and christine was so excited to see jake but they both were pretty rude and both girls loked pretty upset afterwards

- chloe rubbed herself all over jeremy and when she gave him the baby bottle full of alcohol jeremy loked genuinely panicked when the squip made him drink it

- Do You Wanna Hang also made 89% of the audience uncomfortable but it turned pretty funny when jake punch through a fucking window

- michael covered head to toe in trash is such a mood but jeremy look so relieved when he finally saw michael

-  “I had this whole spiel about 12 years of friendship going right down the drain” jeremy looked so guilty but michael looked so hurt and betrayed especially when he was trying to explain why the squip was bad

- jeremy shoved michael into the bath tub after he called him a loser, and all the parents who had no idea what BMC was gasped, and everyone was already crying

- Ryan Everett Wood is such an amazing actor and he really made Michael In The Bathroom the best scene in the whole show

- while jeremy and christine exchange weird noises, the dude in the unicorn costume sits up and just starts barking at them before he passes out again

- they make fun of rich for spazzing and asking for mountain dew red before the squip tells jeremy to skedaddle before the fire

- all of the shiny metallic costumes in Rich Set A Fire really highlighted the guys’ muscles and i liked it

- pitiful children was so well choreographed and i really want a pair of those sick light up sneakers

- as the show goes on and the squips control over jeremy gets stronger, the make up gets more intense and the squip starts to look more dishevelled and corrupt

- jeremy totally fucking roasted his dad (his dad looked so sad and shook) and what does his dad do?? run half naked to michaels house of course

- michael is getting high asf and sitting in a onsie burning stuff

- mr reyes is wearing jeremys costume and he looks so proud of himself until he sees jeremy 

- michael made his entrance through the audience and everyone lost their god damn MINDS

- michael is such a petty bitch like,, jeremy is literally on the ground in pain and he’s just “hmmm no sorry u gotta apologize ://///” and if that ain’t me,,,,,

- michael literally holds jeremy with his arms and legs and jake just shrugs and grabs the mt dew red before pouring it out and michael looks so SHOOK

- “did the squip heal your legs???” in the most evil yet nonchalant high school jock voice i’ve ever heard “No I just can’t feel any pain. and its AWESOME”

- when christine comes out michael starts to walk away like “whoops theres christine looks like he won’t give up the squip now” but gets so excited when jeremy tells her to drink the mt dew

- everyone starts shrieking and michael looks terrified and starts screaming too and when everyone passes out michaels still screaming “AAAAAAAOOOOOOOOHHHHHH FUCK”

- rich is in a legit full body cast but he looks so happy once jeremy wakes up and starts talking to him

- “oh my god i am totally bi” rich sounded so excited and the audience clapped and cheered

- rich and michael kinda had that “you were the only other person in this hospital room i could talk to and you’re not that bad of a person” vibe when voices in my head started playing

- jake looks like he’s about to punch jeremy but he sends him off with a lil bro hug and it’s such a pure interaction!! jeremy looks so stoked that everyone is still talking to him after the play!!!!

- “i think that all of us want to go out with you” they have sweet make out kiss thing and the whole cast is on the high beams looking down at them so fondly 

- the squip comes back and jeremy just started to sing louder and it was so good and such an empowering moment

LITTLE NOTES ABOUT THE CAST: Everyone was so good and they all fit their roles so well! So much respect goes out to Matt, Ryan, Sal, Lizz, Jason, Billy, Vincent, Lisa, Katie, Emily, Carly, Frankie, and Bridget because without their hardwork and dedication to the show, it wouldn’t have been so good!!

You could also tell how much effort was put into the details of the show like, nothing was there to just be there, everything had a purpose and there was never any weird “i dont have any lines so i’ll just awkwardly stand here” moments with any of the actors!! overall the show was  out of this world amazing and i’m so greatful that I had the chance to see it and meet the wonderful actors behind the original and the revival show!!!!

overall rating: hell yes/10

[the-yunhaneul]

OOC WEEK: DAY FOUR

When and how did you get into Harry Potter?: Honestly, HP was one of things where when the films started coming out I saw them, owned the DVDs etc. but I wasn’t hugely obsessed with it? Keep in mind I was 4 when the first film came out so my interests were very different, I was too busy watching Barbie movies and dealing with a new baby sister to be bothered by films in the same way I am now. I continued to get the films and watch them but it wasn’t until I was about 13/14 that the obsession got deep. I think that’s really the age tbh where I needed HP, I needed this idea of magic and this whole other world within our own where things seemed so much better and I needed to be a part of that, and ever since it’s been a growing love tbh. Though I’ll also admit I have a love/hate relationship with HP, for as many things it’s given me there are many things I question or find a little faulty?? If that’s the right word. Basically I feel like HP is my problematic fave of series :’)

Favourite HP movie? Why?: Without a doubt Goblet of Fire. I just love the whole thing, how much new information it gave us about the other schools, the more vivid inclusion of dragons and other magical creatures/beings. Also I love Cedric Diggory, I think he’s such an underrated character and frustratingly he’s only in that one film when he’s mentioned more in the earlier books. I also feel like poor Cedric gets hated on a lot because people think he’s a bit of a dick and forget that the books are basically in Harry’s POV and he’s jealous of Cedric so obviously the way he’s described and viewed is more negative then it needs to be. Basically Cedric deserved better and I love him in that film and the Twi-Wizard Tournament was a cool plot, I think.

Favourite HP book? Why?: I won’t lie, I feel like a sham... I haven’t read all the books, but hear me out on this, as I said earlier I didn’t get into HP until I was about 13/14 and then I started to read the books but then suddenly my GCSE exams were coming up and any reading I did ended up being reading for school and if I did read anything for leisure they were short stories or things that could help towards my GCSE exams. Then I went to college, took English Literature and as you can imagine that meant a lot more reading for school soooooo I never finished the series, I do intend to but I have like a long list of books I want to read/am reading/series I need to finish so who knows when it’ll happen. However, I will say I like the first book, I think the first book is a lovely introduction to the world of HP.

Favourite HP character? Why?: I love Neville. Adore him. Honestly, a part of me would’ve really liked Neville to have even more significance throughout the series, I feel like he played the part of a fool for so long and even though by the Deathly Hallows he’d matured and became a hero I still think he deserved more. I think there’s not a lot of appreciation for young Neville and everything he’s going through, there’s not enough recognition for the fact that he’s in a really difficult family situation and he deals with everything so well, he’s a kid who’s unpopular and not initially great at magic, living knowing his parents were tortured into a state of madness and I feel like not enough of that is appreciated? Plus tbh I think it would’ve been the best plot twist if he were actually the chosen one and Harry was just some diversion and Neville saved the day, I also would’ve liked it if Neville killed Bellatrix tbh or if he’d played more of a part in her demise because of her involvement in making his life extremely difficult.

Least favourite HP character, plot, or ship (or all three)?: My least favourite character is Peter Pettigrew because tbh I just feel like he was a twat and I feel like he was undeserving of being in Gryffindor, undeserving of the friendship he found in that house and undeserving of forgiveness. Plus it really urks me every time I hear Ron tell Harry there wasn’t a Death Eater who wasn’t Slytherin and I’m like “YOU’RE FUCKING RAT IS A GRYFFINDOR TRAITOR, RON!” because I’m very defensive of my house :’) My least favourite plot... erm... I don’t really like the whole sort of plot of Harry in pursuit of Cho Chang? I feel like maybe because she’s another character we hear barely anything of and then suddenly Harry is smitten with her and then not like a year after him and Cho are smooching (in front of Cedric’s picture and the pictures of all the relatives who are dead, which is super like weird in my opinion, like ‘oh poor Cedric, he was a good wizard, he really fancied you and now we should make out in front of his picture’ or maybe not, Harry?) but then he’s suddenly into Ginny and I feel like when his attention turns to Ginny our lovely Cho Chang gets sort of thrown to the side and she becomes unimportant again? Basically I feel like Cho Chang was used as a bit of a tool to make the Harry/Ginny thing more of a ‘surprise’ and she deserved better. My least favourite ship is... erm... I’m gonna be honest and go with Tonks and Remus. Don’t get me wrong I love Tonks, I love Remus and I love we get Teddy from them but I just never saw it? Maybe it’s again because in the films Tonks wasn’t really important for such a long time and then suddenly she shows up and oh by the way she loves Remus and suddenly she’s having a baby? And it’s like ‘woah ok what is happening?’. Plus I just think it’s really lame that JK was ‘going to have Remus be LGBT’ but then chose not to... but still made him a werewolf and used the metaphor which must not be named.

What’s your favourite HP-related memory?: You know one of my favourite HP memories is probably becoming part of the HP RPG community, I feel like I’ve learnt so much more about the series from interacting with other people but, more than that, I’ve heard so many new ideas and own headcanons that, to me, make the whole HP universe so much more interesting... Mainly ‘cause JK left a lot of gaps in information that I desperately need.

Why did you decide to start roleplaying HP-related stuff?: Honestly, I’ve only ever really been part of the HP RPG community and I got into it because a friend of mine was in a group and she told me about it but when I was scrolling the tag I found OL instead and the rest, as they say, is history.

Most interesting part of the HP world?: Erm... I think the creatures, tbh most of the reason I liked Fantastic Beasts was the creatures, I’d happily watch a film of just them in their little homes doing their thing.

Your wand: I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea hahahaha so basically when I first got Pottermore it was so great and fantastic and I loved all my info... then they re-did Pottermore and I couldn’t get my old information back because of an email issue so I made a new account and tbh was bitterly disappointed, the house quiz alone in my opinion is just shit now compared to how it used to be, I literally found out my house and then logged out and haven’t logged in since soooooo I’m not sure what my wand is any more :’)

Your patronus: Again, no idea :’)

Your boggart (if you’re okay sharing!): I’m not really sure what my boggart would be, I’m sort of scared of lots of things tbh, I’m a bit of a wimp so Merlin knows what could come out to greet me, could be just about anything and it’d be too much.

What classes would you be best at in Hogwarts?: Probably potions and arithmancy because I have a lot of patience, like to be precise with things and like working with numbers. Though also possibly divination because I’m learning the Tarots.

What classes would you be the worst at?: Probably History of Magic ‘cause at school I struggled with History XD I loved it, I was just not great at remembering dates and stuff like that.

Your favourite thing to do if you were at Hogwarts: The library. Guaranteed.

Favourite supernatural creature from the HP world?: I actually think dementors are like super cool and an awesome idea... though it’s gotta be a niffler, hasn’t it?

Death Eaters or the Order?: I like to think I’d be part of the poor Slytherin group who when shit went down got blamed for everything when they didn’t do anything like ‘send all of Slytherin back to the dungeons’ and I’m stood there like ‘all I’ve one is read all these years’. Tbh I like both groups though, like although the DEs are obviously insane nutters I think some of them are super interesting and a lot of them are products of their families and how they were treated by other people, like is it really a surprise Draco becomes a ‘DE’ when you think of who his family is and how everyone in Hogwarts hated on Slytherin anyway??

Marauders era or Next Gen?: Marauders.

Would you join the quidditch team or cheer from the sidelines?: Ngl I don’t really like sports so I’d probably be in the library, chilling with a book like “siighhh these athletic types”.

If the Triwizard Tournament were allowed, would you put your name in?: Not a fucking chance.

Dorm life: good or bad?: Erm... I dunno, I feel like tbh I’d be a pain to live with or find other people a pain to live with because I’m very organised and neat and space lacking that would drive me crazy.

From canon HP, who would be your favourite teacher?: Flitwick, without a doubt.

If you could make J.K Rowling write another series (and write it well), would you? And if so, what would you have it focus on?: I’d have it focus on minor characters and what they were doing while Harry was getting into shit, like I’m all for big plots and death but think how much just daily random stuff must happen in a magic school? Like give me a series on the rest of the Gryffindor dorm and what they were doing during the year. Give me a book series about Luna, Cho Chang, Oliver Wood etc.