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sketchehm · 28 days ago

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Oughh i love vampires so much, and the concept of humans being sires is really cool!! Actually, recently, i remembered i had a library app and started reading a long ass book about vampires! :3

:0!! Thats so cool omg!!! That reminds me of when I worked at a bookstore as a cashier and all the different kinds of vampire books people would buy hehe I regret never getting one for myself now TwT

But yea human sires! They're not....very good sires tbh! But neither Dream nor George or Sapnap know that so it's fineee

Human sires just lack....all the vampire stuff lmao

A rouge fledgling vamp would more likely kill the human they imprinted on for food than actually be so enamored by them. The survival instinct just kicks in more. It's just Sapnap and George have the added benefit of most of their childhoods being old ladies always yelling at them about different vampire legends and warnings pfft So they like....know what to do....kinda..... Humans only know so much tbf

And all they know is Dream needs blood. And thats all they think he needs. What's really happening is that they're feeding Dream animal blood which is....not the best source of nutrients for a fledgling nor is it enough to be fully satiated...but it is enough for that survival instinct to calm down and for the inner fledgling to pop in and beg for affection and love and protection! It's just a baby you gotta take care of it!!

And they lack that kind of....communication really! Dream is lacking the mental connection a typical fledgling will have with their Sire and coven. The inner fledgling is constantly trying to reach out to George and Sapnap and because there is no mental reciprocation, it leads to Dream being even more desperate for their attention. But they still leave him in this lonely cave to sleep all alone :( He must not be a good fledgling for them....the few times he tried to follow them made them super mad and made his inner cry out more, making Dream literally cry. Sapnap and George thinks just the fact of being undead, the idea of being technically dead, is making Dream much more emotional...not that this is necessarily a vampire thing.

Dream just can't properly communicate that he Needs them to stay with him. He can say outloud all he wants that he doesn't want them to leave, stay for a little longer please, it's lonely here :((( But snf not really quite grasping how Serious this all is for Dream.

Like it probably does suck to be alone in this forest while your 2 closest people are off doing things you can't participate in anymore :/ like he can't even eat his favorite foods anymore!! They themselves probably wouldn't want to be alone and bored in this dumb forest but that's just a small sacrifice for now! Not really knowing...the mental anguish and despair Dream is going through everytime they leave :(

And they've tried taking turns but it never really quite worked out for a various number of reasons. Such as it taking two of them to actually hunt and also steal various things from town and bring stuff over. But the initial...fear...of just one of them with a vampire was not great...Even if it is just Dream...Though. I think once that's worn off, there is a sort of....pleasure?...that the two of them experience when they get back and Dream is running up to them and hugging them as tight as he can and being generally weepy about them returning every single time. A sort of gratification that Dream needs them so much now and they're so good at taking care of him that he's reduced to this kind of vulnerability. Dream /needs/ them to survive and they /love/ being able to provide for him. They love they have their chance to take care of Dream now.

It probably has something to do with underlying guilt of causing Dream's death tbh...If Dream wasn't trying so hard to take care of them he wouldn't have died. So they want to make up for it as much as possible! Trying....a little too hard tbh....hmmm.

And that's the other thing about human sires. How does a fledgling affect the humans themselves!

While there is no clear mental connection between them, there is a sort of.....amplification of feelings that a fledgling gives off. It's just a survival mechanism tbf, a way to make sure they're not abandoned by their Sires. Super effective on vampires(most of the time)! Not very....effective on humans...but still working!

And it works in odd ways, at least for George and Sapnap. They're a unique case and not human researchers nor bitten vampires themselves would be able to really understand how Sapnap and George are being affected. Just that they are.

They care for Dream unconditionally of course but now theyre under the added influence of... fledgling should just be taken care of and that's all a fledgling can/should do.

This insatiable need to care for Dream always lingering in them but not to the point of not being able to pull away from him. They need to leave to take care of him, of course! Not that they like the obvious evidence of Dream being desperate for their care pfft no never! That just means they're doing a good job! (Not really lmao)

Until...Dream becomes a little more clear headed...and starts doing things on his own again...Fighting back against them more and insisting to allow him to help too...hrmmm...

His inner fledgling begging to just stay in the cave(nest) and be good and wait for Sires...but Dream knows he can help out...and his inner likes the idea of making his Sires happy so....Dream tries....and then snf /aren't/ happy. And his inner is crying and crying and Dream wishes the weird guilt and sad feelings and tears would stop!! He knows he's right on this!!!

And it's a huge conflict in Dream really. He does recognize to a degree that his autonomy is being stripped from him but.....he isn't /too/ bothered by it really....he's more acting cause he cares about George and Sapnap. His rational brain constantly worried about them getting hurt because of him...dying because of him...

It's a real conundrum when Dream is able to fight against his inner fledgling more(due to the lack of an actual vampire sire) but snf can't shake off the feelings of "Dream needs us and should be dependent on us". Quite a pickle!

There's a few conflicts that are bouncing in my head, just putting them in Situations lmao

Like George and Sapnap facing the reality of.. are they really choosing some vampire over their own fellow human(yes of course duh, Dream isn't just some vampire pfft) and sacrificing a bit of their humanity(i.e. murder) to protect Dream (much to Dream's horror and his inner fledgling's delight)

Or Dream facing off another rogue vampire born from the same town and now Dream facing the reality of him being a Monster...perhaps it was one of the brat rich kids that always messed with them and treated them poorly. The curse isn't picky with who the troublemaker is apparently, no excuses! Though....that does lead to a lot of the townsfolk becoming suspicious of Sapnap and George...(The townsfolk could never believe this good and well behaved kid turned on his own, he must've been bitten! And they never got to cremate Dream's body as a precaution...hmmm)

There's also the idea of a bitten vampire coming across Dream while snf are out. Seeing a vulnerable fledgling ripe for the taking. It can't be a rogue because Dream is so well put together, obviously still having his mind in tact! Poor baby trying to survive in this shit cave... And struggling against them! Must have been freshly abandoned and still bonded with his Sire...well, nothing a little of their own blood can't override :)!

#ehm asks #ehm aus #vampire au...? human sires au?? idk what to name this lmao #an amazing ask to wake up to cause Im just using it as an excuse to yap LMAO #unbitten au

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scruffyssketchbook · 11 months ago

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Wait you like dusk TwT??

For some reason i thought you hated him or at least disliked it, like yknow those main characters you originally like but later on hates? As like you don't like it so you make it where everyone will hate him

Then again it might be because of how much dusk suffers in comic AND ask blog, not even mentioning how much of a jerk/evil you make him out to be

Him not getting any of the brotherhoods anything, seperating the box (creating said brotherhoods that we know is a problem), an evil mastermind or at least seems to be, Flame hates him and tells us never trust him (mind you we are led to believe Flame is more of 'the good guy' between the both of them), being careless to the other eevees, manipulating(?) daisy, you mentioning one time that dusk will be hated by everymon and gets left behind (except by Vay and Dawn i'm pretty sure) in the future

This isn't dissing you in any way, i was just genuinely surprised to learn that you liked Dusk with how much you set him up to be someone we should hate

Hope you have a great day :D!

OH YEAH YOU SEE

Dusk doing all of that and being evil was actually *drumroll plz* ... ... ... A COMPLETE ACCIDENT! One that I wasn't aware of until someone who read the comic told me! :D I as a kid just made him a Mary Sue who controlled everything and I didn't realize it! He was my favorite character actually. So then when I found out "shoot, all the things he does is actually kind of bad", I did start to dislike him, BUT YOU SEE, HE'S JUST TOO CUTE!!! And I feel sorry for him QwQ. He genuinely just wats everyone safe and only does what he does out of fear of losing control and bad things happening to everyone due to him not having said control again. Ofc, his actions are still unacceptable, but his motives are pure (most of the time). But yeah his actions are still REALLY REALLY BAD and theres no defending him at all. BUT I STILL VERY MUCH LOVE HIM DESPITE THESE ACTIONS. But he deserves everyone hating him.

But like. again, that again is another issue I personally have with SSEC, isn't it?

Dusk deserves to get punished for his actions. He lies, manipulates, and hurts everyone around him. And like, as things are right now. He def will. EVERYONE will leave him, and he'll be in the position he fears the most- being alone. TRULY alone. And no one is going to reach out their hand to help him because- why should any of them? He ruined their lives, lied to them, broke their trust, hurt the ones they love, etc etc.

But like.

I don't really want to write that anymore tbh. It would be really great to see, don't get me wrong, but like. hmm.

A story. There was a point of time where the active people in the Discord server hated on the main cast and only spoke of the In game eevees. i was hyped about them liking the eevees at first, but as time went on, people showed more and more animosity towards the main characters. It wasn't that these people hated the mains passionately, cause I'd love that. They just didn't care about them, they were apathetic. And these were the core fans that were active in the community daily. Now. I spent years and years crafting these characters and their personalities, so honestly this really hurt me. ^^; I over compensated and said things like "Oh yeah the mains are supposed to be assholes" and did things like focused more on the eevees rather than the mains. I was told things like "The main characters are just not likeable" or "I don't care about the mains, I care about (eevee who has no personality)" by these people who were big fans of my work, and just felt really really bad. Because- The main characters kind of deserve it. I made all of them have BIG flaws, i made all of them do awful things, so why not latch onto one note characters who have done no wrong? Characters who you can shape into anything because they are essentially a blank canvas. Either way, the whole experience made me not like the eevees much, something that I only came out of last year.

With the current trajectory of the series, ALL of the main characters will get exposed for all the shitty things they did and get punished for it. They are the leaders after all, the Politicians, you can say. They are the ones directly in the way of the happiness of the eevees. Their actions or Inactions directly cause mostly all of the issues in the box. They are kind of all the bad guys! Blizz gave the Icedrop leadership to Vay and beats up eevees, Vay is abusive to eevees in his own brotherhood, Bolt cant do anything without Dean and lets Dusk get away with the things he's doing, Flame just does nothing for his brotherhood, Dusk is a tyrant, Daisy is a loyal follower of said tyrant, Eve is a liar, Dawn beats up others and is NEVER THERE. LIKE! I don't blame anyone for not liking them, they are kind of all horrible if you look at it. But I still like them despite these negative traits, and like, I don't really want to write a story where they are the big bad evil guys. I don't want to write a story where the main characters loose all of their friends and hope and can't get any of them back due to their own shitty actions and just remains alone, the thing they fear the most. and I don't want everyone suffering due to the actions of these characters. I want more of well- things like this scrapped script:

Dusk: *Dusk is in the rain, his fur drenched and his spirit broken. As he walks back to the small tree he called home, he idly kicks at a pebble on the ground. Nearing the tree, he looses sight of the pebble, and he looks up, trying to use his arm to lift up the fur in his eyes.* ……? *There, he sees Blizz under his tree, holding an umbrella alone, He seemed to have been waiting for him a long time, as the glaceon was fidgeting with a leaf and there were a small pile of them on the ground next to him.* Blizz: *looks up excitedly, leaf forgotten, and waves at him* Hi Dusk!!! Dusk: *frowns, skeptical and hesitant* ….. why are you here? Blizz: *frowns at him, confused* Why wouldn’t I be here? I wanna hang out with you. Dusk: *Dusk stares at Blizz, in disbelief. Blizz….. What’s to hang out with him? After everything? After all he’s done to him and the others?* W-wha-? Blizz: *stares at Dusk, mimicking his confused expression* Dusk: What about- Everything I did? To you, to everymone! Don’t you hate me like everymon else??? Blizz: *Stares at him confused* …Why would I hate my best friend? *A silence falls between the two as they stared at each other, Dusk flabbergasted. But then, tears started rolling down his cheeks* Dusk: *breaks down, yelling* Why WOULDN’T YOU!??? I’VE MADE YOUR LIFE MISERABLE, I TOOK YOUR FRIENDS AWAY, I MADE EVERYONE LOOK DOWN ON YOU! WHY ARE YOU EVEN TALKING TO ME RIGHT NOW???? Blizz: … Dusk: YOU SHOULD HATE ME! YOU DO HATE ME! YOU SHOULD WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH ME! WHY ARE YOU HERE? JUST TO MOCK ME? JUST TO GLOAT THAT YOU WON? AFTER ALL I DID TO YOU? WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE??? Blizz: … Dusk: CAN'T YOU USE YOUR TWO BRAINCELLS FOR ONCE AND SEE THAT I- Blizz: *He is suddenly holding the umbrella over Dusk, staring at him with intense teal eyes. He blinks* I don't care. Dusk: ... Blizz: I’m here because….. *he looks away, a lopsided frown on his face. He sighs* I know how it feels to be alone, and to have everyone seem like it’s against you. *he looks at Dusk* When it happened to me, when I was alone, when my brothers and when my friends left me and I had no one… you were always the one who held out their paw to me, and we would hang out, and you’d make me feel better. So… I wanna help you feel better too. *He smiles* and I want you to know… that you are not alone. Even if you think you are. I won’t abandon you. We're still best friends! ^^ Dusk: ... *after staring at Blizz like he's crazy, Dusk starts laughing, as tears still fell down his face* You are- an idiot, he says inbetween fits of sobs and laughs* Blizz: But I'm YOUR idiot! :D *Blizz smiles, as Dusk starts sobbing again*

But like- why would Blizz even forgive him? And even if he did, to get to this we have to slosh through a bunch of things, a civil war, a couple betrayals, more characters getting hurt, someone (not Dusk) getting disowned, more mains being frankly awful. And personally, I don't want to write that. That was never what SSEC was meant to be, but what it turned into due to poor planning. But that's what the hundreds of comics and thousands of writings have built up to, so I keep pushing on.

But I'm kind of tired of that.🙃

And if you are wondering why I keep talking about this stuff and not doing anything about it, the only reason why I'm talking about this stuff publicly is because I am in fact, doing something about it.

LET ME COMPLAIN IN PEACE, I EARNED IT.

#rambles

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collectorcookie · 6 months ago

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fandom/game vent

tw: csa

Uuugghgggh. Idk why but nothing feels right lately.

On one hand, the enstars fixation died down A LOT. Great for my bank account tbh, i don't wanna spend another cent on gacha games. My brain is free🎉🎉🎉

And rather than feeling this pressure of "omg i must grind new events and get new cards" or "omg there are so many event stories i missed out on" or "i must grind every single new song on all difficulty levels for dia" i just. Don't do that anymore lol. I actually just play the songs whenever i actually feel like playing any and i read only the stories that actually interest me. Which definitely aren't a lot tbh. (still waiting on that knights climax tl) but yeah i'm basically reading 0 stuff from engstars.

So if you wanna break free from a gacha game sucking your soul, I think the reason why the enstars fixation died down so much for me is a combination of

burning myself out trying to get cards

getting bluetooth headphones (which basically make it impossible to play the game with headphones)

turning the BP game notification off

Engstars TLs getting worse than fan TLs

Obviously i still have basic but since i can't read japanese, i can't stress myself over reading new stories because i can't read anything at all. Yaaaay. I have evolved into a casual player.

Now. On the other hand. The new fixation. My beloved wizards. Mahoyaku.

I'm gonna be so honest, i kinda hate it here.

Don't get me wrong, i love the game, i love the story, i love the characters. But the fans. The fans man.

Like with enstars fandom, i started out with tumblr, and sure, i had to occasionally block some people and filter out some stuff, but that was it. That was enough for me to be able to chill and actually be comfortable in the enstars fandom space on tumblr.

Now, there are basically no mhyk fans on tumblr. Ok fine. Guess i'll go on twitter instead. So i made a twt account.

I truly cannot explain to you how much i should not have done that.

Like, ok, LOTS MORE fanart which is great. Fantastic. Lovely. However, a lot of proshippers. Many many proshippers. Like i do not have that much experience in fandom spaces in the first place but i swear the amount of proshippers is disproportionately large in mhyk fandom, on twt at least.

Ok another warning for talk about csa if you somehow didn't catch the one above

I think it's obvious from my blog here alone how much i like northfam, especially Snow and White. To be so honest, Snow and White were the biggest hesitation for me to NOT get into mhyk because we all know the "child looking character is actually over 2000 y.o." is NEVER handled well in fiction. Well, i ended up reading mhyk anyways, and to my relief, s&w's child forms do not get sexualized ever. Thank god.

But like mentioned before, this is not the case for the fandom. Not only do i always end up finding people shipping s&w together, but also many other of my faves, like oz and arthur (foster father and son) or mitile and figaro (student and teacher). Which i do not want to see ever, and the thing with twt is, you can't tag and filter stuff like on here. And even after being on twt for...idk how many months, i STILL end up seeing stuff i would like to stay 4869761093 lightyears away from.

I've been trying to do everything, from blocking to muting words to clicking the three dots on each individual post i don't want to see for the "please don't show me stuff like this". AND IT STILL HAPPENS.

Idk man...as a csa survivor myself it feels so hopeless...like is it really worth it here if i'll just keep finding stuff that triggers me? Is it worth meeting new people and constantly being on edge if this new fan thinks being proship is ok?

I really did like making fanart for fandom purposes, it made me draw a lot more, but between my dying interest in enstars and mhyk fandom thinking the stuff that has and will put me in therapy for decades is hot. I don't feel like interacting with fandom that much anymore ngl....and that makes me genuinely sad. Idk maybe this is a depressive episode that will go away but i feel so tired for now....hobbies are supposed to be fun....

#Everyone's all about the wellbeing of real people over fiction until you mention that fiction can influence culture which influences #the way real people are handled #Getting told to just get over it by the church as a kid and then getting told to get over it by adults on the internet who aren't victims👍#uuuggghhhh #gameplay rambles #Anyways idk i think i need a break of some sorts but how do i do that??? When my definition of getting a break meant making fanart?????

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chainreh · 2 years ago

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okie some minor fire emblem engage spoilers since i just finished it ↓

i said this on my priv twt the other day but ill say it here too. to me engage > three houses. three houses is a good game and i love her but engage is a good FIRE EMBLEM GAME. three houses is not a good fire emblem game, but engage is fire emblem through and through so i like it more 😊

the story and characters are not bad all this fear mongering about them being terrible is false. yes some of them are super one note, but a lot of them are great. my favs (who aren't main cast) are yunaka, goldmary, pandreo, jade, and louis. anna is also so cute in this game although i dont know how ethical it is to let her fight in the war lol. and i love the entire main cast🫶veyle, ivy, diamant especially.

i also really loved the story of the four hounds, probably some of my favourite villains of any fire emblem game tbh and maybe even all games? i was actually really excited to fight them over and over again since the game sorta presents itself as not only a war but a race to see who can get all the rings, so it actually felt like they were trying to get in your way.

the story is fairly basic and you can probably see things coming from a mile away, but the writing isnt abysmal like Another modern fire emblem game. and it did actually catch me off guard at some points which i appreciated.

overall its good i love it and ill be thinking about it for however long probably a while. i was so excited for this and it delivered 😭i was a hater when the first trailer dropped but not anymore i prommy🫶

#fire emblem engage #engage spoilers #←thats probably the tag i'll use if u wanna blacklist it #also very side note but am i the only person in this world who ships ivy and diamant😭#i dont know their pair name and i cant find anything for them😔💔

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nighttimepixels · 4 years ago

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TALK TO US ABOUT MASS EFFECT I HAVE BEEN AN INSANE MASS EFFECT/SHAKARIAN TRASH PERSON SINCE 20-FUCKING-11 AND LEMME TELL YOU THOSE FEELINGS HAVENOT TARNISHED A SINGLE FRACTION IN THOSE TEN YEARS OH MY GOOOOOOODDDSSSS!!!!!!!

I DEMAND A PLAY-BY-PLAY UP TO THE MINUTE OF YOUR REACTIONS TO EVERYTHING!!!!

you are so valid and I totally see why everyone I've ever mentioned it to loves the hell out of it

aksdjlsdfj I meannnn if you want to hear my rambling about it then hell yeah

Okay, gonna put this below the cut to save everyone else XD also- since I'm not leaving this Mass Effect obsession anytime soon, if you're not interested in seeing occasional posts about it, please feel free to block the tag "night plays ME"~

(mild spoilers ahead??)

((also for real I mean it when I say this is rambling as hell lol, apologies and no stress if absolute no one reads all this))

OKAY SO Mass Effect 1-

Stars help me, I was honestly hooked right from the start?? Like even in Legendary Edition (the combined trilogy just re-released in one "can play it on one system + minor improvements", for anyone who doesn't know) where it's smoothed out, of course it's obvious that ME1 is a decade old... but the foundation for these relationships are all there and gods I love them already.

Like - Kaiden right off the top is a delightful good fightin lad, what the hell. I've heard that he's viewed as 'bland' by a good portion of the fan community but I dunno, he's a delight and even more complex by the time 2 rolls around and you encounter him on Horizon, it was honestly Ashley I was way more meh about - mostly because before you can learn about her family history/etc, she comes off as hella xenophobic and I was immediately offended for my growing space family that she didn't like/trust all the aliens around, pfff.

(she gets redeemed a bit through further actions/evolving thoughts, but I thought in retrospect it was a bummer that they didn't flip the order there, give her a chance to be liked before the complicating factor of being so rude about aliens >:c that then she could grow from... ah well. Apparently she has a good arc but uh, let's just say I chose Kaiden at the "key junction" in the latter part of the game so I won't be seeing anymore of Ashley uh... anytime soon, haha.)

Garrus??? Is??????? The ABSOLUTE best???????????

I liked him from the start, I'm always a bit of a sucker for a rogue-detective "the system won't bring this bastard to justice, so I've got to" type and all their moral shadiness XD But he just gets better, honestly, and where I'm at in ME2 (right before the Reaper IFF mission, as of typing this, with everyone's loyalty!) I am only digging myself deeper into this hole-

-*wheezing* okay anyways -

Wrex is AMAZING I love fightin' middle-aged krogan bastard, gods. Liara is great too, I'm a sucker for a wlw relationship (playing fem!Shepard, so) - buuuut I'll admit she's a bit more one-note in ME1. Last week while I was still on ME1 I remember hearing (while trying to dodge spoilers) that her arc is really good, though. I think they leaned a little hard on the 'innocent but sexy' sterteotype on her (so despite the yikes aspect of a few of the things I've learned in ME2, lol, I actually really like the complexity that's been added to her character.)

Saved Liara first, so by the time I got to Noveria and had the standoff with Benezia there was the chance to have emotions over Liara having to face her TwT and of course, I made the questionable but quality decision to free Queen Rachni heheh. no ragrets

More than a blow-by-blow of my choices though I totally wanna take the chance to say that even in the mild jankiness of ME1 (goddammit, the Mako.... please..... please just go up this impossible cliff I just want to resource hunt-) the way that the lore, both obvious/key to main plot and the lesser/filler/background/world-building kinds... I just love it. It incorporates it well, you can go ham in the codex learning more, or just dive into the basics - it's clearly a complex galaxy (and they do an even better job in 2 of fleshing it out further), and it never really felt overwhelming. It was pretty natural figuring it all out-!

Plus the interesting implications of resource hunting amongst the sapient races, and the little side missions you better bet I did every one of- there's so much rich depth in the story if you do 'em!! (And that lead with that Keeper side mission...? Looking back, damn, clever foreshadowing-!!!)

And oh my gods, Ilios??? hell yeah. I loved that mission so much, especially having Garrus & Kaiden with me when talking to the hologram/computer, and more than anything, that last sprint in the Mako trying to get to the jump before it closed-???

yeet the boi-

Also mannn I love a good setpiece, and having to go up the side of the elevator, space-side?? such a cool setup!!

Plus it felt good having been Paragon enough (as simple as the good v bad vibe system is, I don't hate it, lol) to avoid one of the Saren fights, ngl. And the er, "second fight" with Sovereign-Saren.... hell yeah

... I'll admit I had to double check my choice re whether to save the Council. I did in the end, but I swear, sometimes the way they phrase things I'm like ".... okay but Garrus is right, defeating Sovereign is more important than these few leaders??????" woops. Listen, priorities, is all I'm saying..... (￣ヮ￣|||)ゞ

'Course later they emphasize (in ME2) that there were 10,000 people on that same ship and I was like well I wouldn't have second guessed if I'd known that, I mean c'mon-

Also I did indeed romance Liara in this one, so I got that scene ;Dc But,,,, I also knew by the end that I was totally gonna romance Garrus in 2 since he's an option then finally,,,,, lemme tell you the guilt as I waffled over whether to romance Liara bc of it. hahaha.

Aaaaand Mass Effect 2-

So I'm only up to right before the Reaper IFF Mission, so I don't know the ending, etc etc lol. That said, I've just finished every side mission I've found with the exception of the Shadowbroker Quest and the Arrival Quest (I've heard the latter basically leads into ME3, and the former is best either right before the Omega 4 jump or in postgame).

So from the start - fuck yeah fuck yeah what a high adrenaline start Shepard noooooo but also yes save Joker aH-

The motion comic too hot damn nice job

I loved this setup, seriously - especially forcing Shep into this situation, having to work with/for Cerberus, and the compelling reasoning given behind "why" they do what they do (I especially found it a good point that the Salarians have the Task Force, the Asaris the Commandos, the Turians the- etc... like, true, when you put it like that, having a similar group advancing human interests/solving human interstellar problems is pretty reasonable...). That said, I love too that it really isn't shied away from how Cerberus is nonetheless fucked up - or its at least done fucked up stuff.

Listen, I still think some messed up stuff is gonna be revealed in 2's endgame......... after that Horizon mission and the Collector's ship???? TIM I SEE YOU YOU SHADY MF-

aaanyways lol...

I'm so so glad on a gameplay level they nixed the Mako style exploration. A few Hammerhead missions are fine and a lot more focused than the slippery ass navigation in that glorified ATV, pfff. The probes are a neat way of getting after similar resources - and more importantly, having good levels and some good hubs (the Zakera Wards, Omega, Ilium, etc) is way way more fun than having a more 'sprawling' space that is.... a lot of empty nonsense, lol.

Then there's the fact that we get Joker right off the bat and you can interact with him so much - and him and EDI??? Get out gods I love them. Kasumi is so right when she says they sound like a bickering old married couple lol. I have a terrible feeling that some shit is gonna happen with EDI..... but I don't think she's evil as-is, at least.

Side-eying the hell out of those "access forbidden" parts of her that she doesn't even know.... and the fact that her AI core has a locked door access................... something's gonna happen gdi LEAVE OUR ADOPTED AI ALONE.

(Also Joker pls stop fracturing your thumb on the mute button)

Also please save me there are so many hot aliens in this game,,,,, the xeno/monsterfuckers really comin' through strong in the sequels............... doin' the lord's work........................................

In general, I love how many levels ME stepped up in two with complexity and interwoven narratives!! Like, to the point it'd be almost a drag to replay ME1, even though it was fun going through it (if occasionally a bit tedious with the cookie cutter rando planet science/mine facilities, lol). Like, just from how fun and interesting ME2 is, mostly! more of all the pre-introduced races, plus new ones, plus more filling in of intragalactic politics, and more interesting implications of all these space-faring races mixing....

Also gods WREX and his planet holy shit,,,,, fuckin' hell yeah my man get their shit together and also adopt Grunt yes good-

And Mordin??? My singing semi-evil scientist best friend forced to confront his choices more than he thought he ever would have???? With some of the best ongoing general report chatter of all the companions??

(when I tell you I choked on my coffee when I talked to him after confirming romance choice w/ Garrus and that 'pamphlet' and 'anaphalactic shot if ingesting-' kajsldkfjsldfjk)

Like, fuck, the fact that they actually dive into the mixed morality and horrors of the genophage, and you can confront Mordin on it, for good reason, yet he still stands his ground, until finally some bits of his loyalty mission seem to... affect him, and I'm guessing might set up things for 3 with him? Unsure, but either way, damn, the fact that they start to dig into it...

And Taliiiii my beloved forbidden alien wife TwT her loyalty mission was SO GOOD. I love how varied they all are?? Getting to defend her and discover what she'd unwittingly been a part of-!!

Zaeed is a bastard but tbh I love that he is and that he's unapologetic in him - and Kasumi omg, best thief. A heist?? Gods, yes- I love our couch lounge chats XD

Samara is..... illegally.......... she's an illegally powerful and beautiful and eloquent MILF...........................

(.... listen I'm sapphic as hell and I'm kicking my own ass for picking her up last aksjdlfksjdfl - but her loyalty mission, damn. And seeing how there's this interesting cultural subset, and the struggle with the Asari in that they unquestioningly accept/respect justicars, but also know that the impact outside their culture is a diplomacy nightmare waiting to happen-)

,.,,,,,T,,, Thane,,,,,

I am weak for morally implicated murder dads okay?? And that voice??? His mannerisms?????? How you first see him, and that prayer after assassinating her...???????? And his history/his people's history with the hanar, gods I love how messy it is, it feels so much more real!

Also Jack is a mess and I love her (and want to get her some therapy, omg), and her and Miranda nearly duking it out after you've done both their loyalty missions??? so good and makes a lot of sense-! Honestly I would love more interactions between teammates on the ship, but there's already so much the devs had to balance I can't blame 'em for minimizing, heh. But suffice to say I also love Miranda and Jacob, even if I'm softest for my alien crew XD Hell yeah Jacob, we'll get loud and spill drinks on the citadel indeed TwT

.... I could write a whole essay on how much I love Garrus oTL Perhaps because he and Tali are the throughlines from 1 on your 2 crew, I have some of the strongest feelings about them... but genuinely, he was one of my favorite companions in the first game, and how you find him as Archangel in two? Getting to help him fight his way out after he's gone nearly 48 hours straight fighting off three gangs alone, jfc. His vengeance quest and what can happen there.... That line? fuck me, that line -

It's so much easier to see the world in black and white. Grey? I don't know what to do with gray...

How DARE you come for my heart like this, devs holy shit

(also, some other choice faves so far from the series from him include We can disobey suicidal orders?? and This wasn't in my training manual... [in 1, if you have him with you @ th Thorian fight] and his whole.... pop the heat sink - in his romance ;Dc)

asdasdfksadjfkl like I said I can write an essay on him PFFF suffice to say I'm very looking forward to his romance scene and where things go in 3

But yeah gods I'm just gonna keep rambling if I'm not careful lol. Gods I don't even know what to talk about it's all so good and while I can understand people roasting the obviousness of Paragon V Renegade (v neutral) choices/alignments, I think they do a pretty damn good job in 2 of pushing it further - to the point that there were some times that I accidentally got renegade points and I wasn't that mad, haha. There's so much fun in the interactions that I just have a good time anyways~

I have so many thoughts about TIM (The Illusive Man) and Cerberus.... theories evolving galore............... and like, what the hell!! Omega 4 going to the center of the galaxy is such a cool twist, goddamn - though my heart still breaks at losing Kaiden (his line if you haven't romanced him?? about feeling like he lost a limb when he lost you??? holy shit.... but I also can't blame him for not trusting Cerberus to the point of it affecting his ability to trust Shepard... like fuck Shep go after himmmm) I'm really excited to see where that goes since he comes back in 3, and what the fuck happens with Cerberus bc while I love the fact that obviously there are a lot of people in it for the right reasons, doing good work, there are those that are doing the opposite, and I have a very bad feeling about where TIM will end up landing....

All that said though I need to do the Reaper IFF mission (where I'm lightly spoiled as to getting That Boy, but not how/what happens to make it so - just that it's apparently wise to have all your side missions done before getting him...) and the actual Omega 4 jump. So we'll see what happens and what I think about it from there heheh!

.... major kudos and genuine props if you made it here to the end, I am so sorry for not editing on condensing all this, and appreciate you so much ;w;

#night answers #night plays ME #(yes that's a purposeful pun lol)#((i sure have played myself by starting this series its so good aksdjflskjfd))

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violetto-lily · 3 years ago

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do you think they would make more of a build up to it if it's their last album ever? I guess it would make sense given that they're about to do (tw I think?) military enlistment (if they end up not being exempt) but I feel like it would he kind of weird that they'd split up now, right at the so-far-peak of their careers and without warning... I'm not arguing or anything lol ig I'm just trying to convince myself it won't happen maybe. and sorry for all the asks lol, you're the only one on my dash talking about the new album

tbh i think they’ve had a great build up, from mots:7 being literally the best album of all time lol and the ptd tour + scammys again, that’s a pretty good buildup imo. i’m actually pretty sure they’re officially exempt from enlistment! so unless they choose to enlist on their own, i don’t think they have to anymore (but don’t quote me on that lol).

about this being the peak of their careers, i agree. they’re at the highest point in their careers and probably lives, but isn’t that the best place to end it? “go out with a bang,” they say :)

i totally understand being worried, i was literally having panic attacks when mots:7 came out because i thought they were disbanding 💀 again, this is just my speculation and none of it is fact! it’s very possible that they’ll continue for another 7 years and beyond :) but i personally think their time as kind of an “official kpop boy group” is coming to an end. i think they’ll expand more as musicians and artists in other ways than just group comebacks and i think that’ll be an exciting new chapter for everyone!

no matter what, i know bts isn’t going to leave us :) even if they disband, they can and will be blowing up our weverse/twt/insta notifications 24/7 lol. these boys love us so much and they’ll definitely do what’s best for us and them 💜

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chrisbangs · 3 years ago

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Hello, I have a question and was wondering if you could maybe help. Is there any place (please not Twitter) that updates the list of the shops that pre orders are sold out from? The page for skz here is basically dead. I'm in the US and I was trying to buy a couple more korean albums, because SubK is doing the US version, but I'm not having a lot of luck. Also, what place has the best pob for photocards? Thanks a lot!

hello!!! 🥺🙏 honestly i don't think there is one specific place that lets ppl know which shops have sold out.. there might be on twt but ive never looked tbh jsjsksks i know that the skz update blog used to update which shops have been sold out etc etc :( but unfortunately like you mentioned they're not super active anymore ;; right now most korean shops still seem to have stock for the regular ver of the album!! from what ive seen?? but i cant be certain abt every single one!!

i think subk is doing 2 version!! so they have the us ver but they also have the korean ver if i remember correctly;; idk if it's sold out or not?? but if you're in the us and you're not looking to pay crazy shipping rates 🥲��🙏 id say that's your safest bet;;

as for best pobs omg idk it really does depend per album bb like 😭💔 sometimes some eras it's good some eras it's meh.. i guess for sure the synarra benefit always sucks LMAO 😭 um my personal favourite is usually interpark !! their pobs usually end up being my favs or they have been for the last 2 eras!! i'd say interpark, withdrama, hottracks, and makestar maybe ?? have some of the nicest pobs!! chans shopee and aladin pobs during noeasy were some of my favs !! but then the aladin pob for xmas evel was lowkey kinda meh quality to me ?? so again idrk it kinda depends on the photos they do tbh TT __ TT

last night my proxy managed to buy from aladin, soundwave, interpark, music planet, and hottracks for me !!! so those shops i do believe are still available at least 🥺🙏💖 oh also!! i know that 🥺 synarra usually ends up having the cheapest ems for me personally !! i'm in canada and i usually pay abt 30 cad for shipping from them which is not great but if you're buying through ksites, you're usually not gonna luck out for shipping;; i think also ?? music plaza is known to be pretty good?? ive never bought from them but a few of my friends and even some of my ig mutuals have bought !! from there so 🥺🙏 !! idk if this is any help but hopefully you can find somewhere to go for!!

#anon #answered #shwhwhjsnsjsn🥲🥲🥲🥲 sorry idk if this is any help at all

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sukirichi · 4 years ago

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In light of the recent spoilers of JJK, I’m gonna need physical proof. Like, my living eyeballs need to see said spoilers 👁👁 until then nothing has happened 😀

warnings: jjk manga spoilers!

oh anon i think the physical proof would just ruin me more ashsjkal i tried to tell myself that oh no yeah anything can happen, it’s probably not real, the chapter isn’t finished and it would be anti-climatic to give us a backstory and sneak peeks of his significance but...i’m just trying to move on rn lmaooooo. been crying the whole day and i am a dried prune, so idk ✌🏻

more asks answered under the cut!

suki let’s cry together 🙁 i’ve been in denial and have been crying abt the leaks on twt. anyways even if he d-worded we can always write fics where he’s alive! i will forever deny his death 🥲

yes anon yes please let us cry together. yeah right? like damn i have never cried this much lmfao. i do want to write fics for him but i’m currently on the five stages of grief hahahha idk i don’t want to believe it!!!

@fyodors-crime SUKI WTF i haven't been on here in a while but WHY THE FUCK WOULD THEY KILL NAOYA OFF AND THEN DISBAND THE ZENIN CLAN WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING i'm lowkey shaking no this is too soon for him to go

bestie idk what is going on either 😀🤡

its the anon that kept going "ok" sorry about that im in a state of denial

its alright bestie i am still not in a state of denial so here be the waterworks 😭

@naoyailoveu he isn't dead if we don't read the chapter

the leaks???? smh our man deserves more than that

Naoya had so much potential. Damn I'm sad

JJK 152 LEAKS: i was literally just saying that i was happy bc of the hiatus so like naoya will be alive for longer then boom the leaks :((

jjk manga spoilers! - - - he had sooo much potential :(( i was hoping we’d even see him in the culling game or at least have a face off with megumi in the future

EXACTLY LIKE! why introduce a character as iconic as that with the sneak peeks of his backstory and then he was killed by the most irrelevant character? feel like gee is just slandering naoya bcos we didn’t even get a proper backstory / future arc / or even a part where he shows what he’s capable of 🥺 plus that death is so!!! he got a dramatic entrance and had a lame death what is that 😔

@mimines My condolences. You were always on my tl simping over him ( This is my first time using Ask so hopefully I dont embarrass myself )

i love him sm 🥺💕

with how jjk manga is going i do really wonder if gege is still enjoying his work bc ngl after the shibuya arc everything seems too rushed 👁👁🥴🥴

ah same anon same same...i have a feeling gege is not enjoying writing jjk anymore and i’m worried that he might just end up killing everyone and it’s so 💀it feels too rushed like where is the story going anymore 😐

are you okay? not in direct regards to the leaks but the fact that ppl seemed to run to your inbox to spoil it for you... idk I hope you’re doing alright

i am alright thanks for the concern! i don’t mind being spoiled 💕

man i hate this chapter my heart hurts i really wanted gege to keep him a little longer at least wtfff

I JUST SAW THE SPOILERS AAAAA It's a bit of an unfulfilling end tbh with the build in Naoya's character only for him to be d-worded by a character who appeared in less than 5 panels. Like, since there was a little back story and how he was sympathetic to Toji and Gojo huhu Naoya's a good character to just die. I'm sad for his character since he's just the reflection of what a misogynistic and power greedy society does to a child. He would've survived ajdjasjQJFJAJDJAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

naoya’s design was so cool i mean he was supposed to be this traditional dude but he had DYED hair and piercings djsjsjsns😩 please if he was stabbed or something there’s still hope (as long as he still has his head) who knows what if someone healed him or something ugh im desperate

I really thought Naoya would make a great antagonist and represent something,,,even if it was a bad cause or bad behavior or whatever, bcos his character had so much potential and he was so iconic and just... Like what is going on??? Exactly Gege had so much build on Naoya and even that backstory of him wanting to stand with Toji and Gojo and then 💀 omg anon ikr...like no one is born evil, Naoya’a beliefs are ones he grew up in and I think he perfectly represents why family plays an influential part in one’s growth and that he’s just another kid who was raised wrongly by the toxicity of the Zen’in clan 💀 UGH ANON I SURE DO HOPE HE STILL HAS HIS HEAD 😭😭😭 i’m desperate too but i’ve long accepted that maybe it’s time for me to go as well, the zen’in estate is empty anyway 😔 /lh

my notifications just spoiled me omg, wow 😢

Why do people have to spoil the jjk chapters 😭😭

why are your anons so rude? if they know youre a naoya stan why would they send you spoilers like that knowing it might upset you? people shouldn’t spoil the deaths of their faves because it could be really hurtful and its annoying because its like no one cares what you feel

smhhhh why are people telling you he died like eye 🧍🏽‍♀️do they not know it would be upsetting

besties...i am okay with spoilers, i love spoilers actually. thanks for the concern but i don’t think any of the people who spoiled me had the intention to upset me with it, rather to just tell me on what went on. yes ofc i’m heartbroken by the turn of events but i am not mad at anyone. if anyone was being rude to me i would call them out on it, plus my blog is not spoiler free so its a given i am okay with spoilers.

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #jjk: manga spoilers #tw: death

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megafaunatic · 4 years ago

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also no pressure 2 respond to this but i was wondering if u have any advice for being new to publishing fic? i’ve been rly inspired by how vibrant & fun mdzs fandom is but i am a little (lot) terrified of just sending my work out into the void lol (i literally only remade my fandom tumblr/twitter for mdzs….It Got Me). ok sorry i’m rambling now but yeah if u have any advice abt publishing stuff or getting more involved in writer fandom community generally i would be v grateful, thank u so much !

OOHHH!!! well first of all welcome back 🤩💛 RIGHT ON it's so great that you feel inspired!!!! i feel the same way 🥰✨ reading and writing f*nf*ction has done way more for my prose writing than my english degree did so 🤪

TIPS... tips... let's see! i have em

first off, let me preface this by saying: a LOT of fandom popularity is circumstantial. my personal Fandom Trajectory has a lot to do with timing and the people i knew, and/or who knew me! plus, i happened to be one of the first wave of english language writers for BOTH jjba AND mdzs, so i already had fics posted when respective fandoms ballooned. this isn't something you can rly engineer, it's just smth to keep in mind as like. a structural aspect? i think it's probably harder to break big in mdzs fic as a new writer now than it was in 2018 - which def isn't to say it can't be done, just that it says nothing abt the quality of your fic if it DOESN'T explode.

ANYWAY on to practical Tips

first of all: yay mdzs twt!! idk if you've seen this yet, but there's a pretty common thing on mxtx Content Creator Twitter where every wednesday, people post short excerpts of their WIP fic!! just enough to be mysterious and drum up interest 🤨 that's a rly good way to start interacting w writers!! there's a hashtag #mdzsww but i just say "wip wednesday" somewhere in my tweet. i'm way more active on mdzs twitter than i am here tbh so i'm not certain whether wip wednesday had migrated over to tumblr, but tbh worth doing even if it hasn't!

in general just making yourself a friendly & interesting person to interact with is a good way to make friends!! esp when u've just made a new acct, it's kind of like. if you don't say hi first, who will, u know? but also a weirdly efficient way to get ppl to follow you is to just throw funny character thoughts out into the universe. to this day ive gotten more followers from this tweet than from any non-new-fic-tweet ive ever made

when you post your fic, tag accurately and write the summary with confidence!! my tagging strategy is generally to go from "genre" (fluff? angst?) to "premise" (canon divergence? 5+1?) to "themes" (intimacy?) to "specifics" (sharing a bed? family tension?). my summary strategy is to pick 1-3 lines from the fic - often dialogue, but not always - that capture the general tone, and then a SINGLE line describing the general premise ("they go on a road trip"). that's all! no apologizing!!!!

once your fic is posted on ao3, talk about it!! i make promo tweets with 2 screenshots of the ao3 page: 1 that shows the title and description, and 1 that shows the tags and warnings. then a link, and the text of my tweet has the words "new [ship] fic" in it somewhere - for a while i used hashtags, but then i realized... when i'm trying to find something on twitter, i never check hashtags! i just use the search function, which picks up on any text in the tweet.

i don't make promo posts on tumblr anymore bc i have way fewer followers here and i cant be assed LOL but when i did, i basically just replicated all the warnings/tags/description in the text of the post, so people would know what they were clicking on! and then just tag all the necessary fandom/ship tags

OK I THINK THAT IS... ALL FOR NOW... i hope this is helpful!!! imo like 2/3 of fic popularity is "writing what people want to read" (whether your strength is scenario, characterization, beautiful prose, weird horny, etc), and the other Full Third is just. circumstances. luck. word of mouth. sometimes you post something and it gets attention right away! sometimes you post it and then an ao3 collection gets posted ALL AT ONCE and 25 new fics immediately bump yours off the front page. IT'S A WEIRD WORLD OUT THERE!!

#HOPE THIS IS HELPFUL!!#if there's more specific things u have questions about i am always happy 2 answer #i love . TALKING

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britishhusbands · 4 years ago

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hii so I just wanna say something haha I’ve been following you for sooo long since the 1d/larry times back in the days (wow I felt old saying this) I don’t even see myself as a 1d stan here anymore since I just post about bts but wow my surprise was to see someone from the “old days” of 1d being a bts fan (also a taekooker omgsjdjjs) just thought that was cute hehe hope you have a nice day! 🥰

omg yes hello!! rip ikr same, i've been on this hellsite for too long. the amount of 1d fans/larries that are now bts fans is amazing tbh. i'm usually on my bts stan twt account these days at @lipbalmtk in which just like i used to do on tumblr, i yell about fic, taekook and bts in general.

also sidenote i love your url! it also looks similar to the url i use in rhythm hive and other random accs "serenitae". i hope you have a great day too!

#sereintae #asks #bts #lmao also also we j amber eline and i have a bts gc we created recently #in which we just roast ourselves and 1d sdklfjsld

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routofpretty · 3 years ago

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would absolutely recommend Firefox! switched over a few months ago and i love it a loT

i was looking for alternative browser bc *gestures vaguely* c h r o m e and a moot on twt said they used Firefox. initially I was apprehensive bc there were a few stuff that I wasn't sure Firefox would have (esp given that it isn't chromium)

one of my main concerns was sorting/organizing tabs and a few extensions that i Need so I can actually function, and also speed bc...I have a lot of shit open all the time and frequently switch between them rapidly.

I found that i literally had nothing to worry about lmao. I don't have nearly as much tabs as op (~100 tabs) but it still works a Lot faster than chrome did when I had significantly less tabs open (tbh I didn't even realized i had that many open already bc I couldn't feel it). and for the group tabs, Firefox has a ton of options in the add-ons for how you'd prefer to organize! personally, I use Panorama Tabs because it fits my need to have clearer visualization of organization. and I would ESPECIALLY recommend it if you've used/are using opera for its "workspace" function and like it (bc ik i did when I used opera for a bit) because its essentially a similar idea but m u c h better. the "groups" are almost their own windows/workspaces without LITERALLY being their own window. you can easily see them all and switch between them if you wish but otherwise, if you're working in a particular group, you can't. and that's very helpful for my easily distracted brain.

and using it in tandem with container tabs (Multi-Account Containers) is a godsend because you have multiple tabs for the same site but signed into different accounts so you can keep school/work vs personal accounts open in their respective groups without having to log in again or reload. (you can also default certain sites to always open in a specific container tab so you are Always signed in on that site. for me, that's YouTube because my account for that is separate from my personal email and so its always signed in on my "entergayment" tab)

ALSO!! a lil thing that brings me great joy: yknow how if you open up a certain amount of tabs chrome kinda squishes them together??? so they can all fit in view?? and if you open enough you eventually can't even see the site title anymore?? which sURE IS A BITCH WHEN YOU HAVE MULTIPLE TABS FROM THE SAME SITE AND THE ONLY THING YOU CAN SEE IF THE ICON.

w e l l.

Firefox doesn't have that problem!!! the tabs only squish a very small amount so the site titles are ALWAYS visible. and instead of squishing to take up the tiniest amount of space possible, what happens is there is tab scrolling. there are arrows at the ends of the tab display bar and can scroll through to see your tabs instead (or use the mouse wheel if you're using a mouse). BUT, its also a feature you can disable if you don't want it!!! so rly we all win here.

and tbh just...in general, if you have a concern about a specific feature or smth that you need from Chrome, there's very high chances that Firefox has a corresponding add-in or default improvement to it.

tldr: give Firefox a try!! even just for a week or so!! learn a bit about it, dick around with it, and hey you might even end up sticking with it!!

The Chrome browser exists to show you ads and track where you go so that Google can show you more ads. Please stop using Chrome. Firefox is open source, and while Mozilla is not perfect, it isn’t actively fucking evil the way Google is. It has a bazillion plugins, including various (FREE!) ad block plugins (I recommend uBlock Origins, which will even block YouTube ads – you can watch videos without interruptions again!). It will also function very effectively with a lot more tabs open than Chrome. I’ve got around 800 tabs open right now (not loaded, of course, except for maybe 2 dozen; it’s been a heavy browsing day), and my wife has between 2k and 3k at any time.

We are in the New Browser Wars. This time there’s a helluva lot of money up for grabs, because a lot of it is about running those ads. Monopolies are bad for consumers.

Just go download Firefox.

#firefox #give it a try!!#find a better browser that also supports your privacy!!!#web browser #browser #important

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rmjunhao · 7 years ago

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wHAT’S GUCCI, GANG?? i’m yumi and i have here for you, xu junhao!! he’s blessed w diamond mimicry, a 19 yr old first year, uni rugby player, alpha initiate, business major w concentration in international relations, and certified Hot Mess™. i have his pages linked & a rundown for him under the cut as well if you’re so inclined to check it out!

anyways, i’m super excited to be here and write with y’all so smash that like button if you’d like me to slide into your ims for plotting purposes ofc (((; i also have a twt ( @sichengly ) and a discord ( yumi#1724 ) if that makes life any easier for you.

soOoOooOOo yeah, pls love me & my boy. over.

profile ! mutation ! bio !

it’s hui janho if u prefer cantonese! probably goes by jun a lot. your resident student athlete stereotype.

a big shot celebrity child from hong kong from the start bc his parents are a former gold medal figure skating olympian turned ceo & a model/actress

do i even have to mention that financially he is extremely well off

obviously he had to play the part of the perfect son so learning how to act & also being in the center of the public eye is something that became normalized in his life from a very age but eventually he grew to love the attention, the endorsements, the lifestyle

junhao by nature was a Wild child, the type to mess around and get himself almost killed if his parents turned around for two seconds

story time: 7 yr old junhao for some reason thought it’d be a brilliant idea to try to rollerblade on his slip n’ slide because that acceleration tho—yeah he has a long jagged scar on his left knee from that despite his mother’s expensive anti-scarring creams bc his toddler fingers couldn’t help but pick at the scab!!

parents signed him up for all kinds of sports as soon as he could freaking walk to channel some of this reckless energy into something more productive

eventually stuck with rugby & was well on the path to playing professionally with various uni scouts fighting to recruit him until the Incident during 12 grade

naturally a very social boy and made friends left and right ,, but of course his lifestyle led him to come off as snobby to some people

a fellow high school classmate was one of said people and clashed w junhao from the start ,, now junhao isn’t known for being a pacifist and he kinda got a kick out of egging this boy on bc let’s be real, he’s your typical, immature teenager

one day the snide remarks escalated into a full on fist fight in which junhao’s powers manifested for the first time

imagine punching and being punched by a blindingly bright boy whose skin is literally as hard as rock that also happens to be 183 cm tall & 65 kg of mostly muscle ,, yeah it didn’t end very well for that boy

it took a boatload of $$$ and lawyers to get the school to keep their mouths shut about what really happened

lots of outlandish rumors spread about what happened that damaged his public image and he lost a lot of his university offers because of this

parents wanted to send him away so he could learn to “fix” this issue somewhere far away from them so they pulled every string in the book to get him into gumi for rugby although he did have to take a gap year bc of this mess

as far as the general public knows, he’s being shipped all the way to s. korea for uni bc he’s the new youth ambassador for a pro mutant-human coexistence organization & NOT bc he’s an actual mutant himself okay?? parents are also paying $$ to keep it on the dl

he quite likes his mutation? like he gets a fresh start bc of it and passively he’s got a subtle glow now, rock hard abs w/o the maintenance, and flawless skin bc of it so he’s liTERALLY SPARKLING ( u can be sure he’s abusing the Heck outta this ) like what’s there not to love??

he’s basically been disowned by his parents at this point so like he doesn’t give a shit abt their reputation anymore ,, as for his reputation he’s trying to rebuild it from the ground up, joining alpha as an initiate cause he’s trying to be on the winning side of things ( also hE NEEDS THE MONEY ,, like he’s lived a certain lifestyle his whole life ,, he “can’t function” without a monthly shopping allowance of at least $3000, okay? ) && cause he’s trying to show that even if he’s a mutant, he can still be great

personality wise, he’s like your stereotypical ( kinda spoiled ) loudass 19 yr jock who rarely takes anything seriously, jokes around too much, laughs at dick jokes, & doesn’t know when is not an appropriate time to snicker at vines on twt

kinda a fuckboi ,, not gonna lie ,, thinks he’s the Shit & flirts with literally everyone pls stop him

trouble kind of always follows him around ,, he’s always got stupid ideas that he’ll act upon before thinking through the consequences but it’s always minor things like ,, he’s not a murderer or anything pLS

does take his instagram seriously tho and is the type plan his “feed” weeks in advanced!! anything for the fans tbh ( and for his own vanity )

lowkey a closeted kpop girl group fanboy!! like he listens to twice and momoland on the daily ,, knows all the dances to all the songs ,, u get the gist but stfu he doesn’t like talking about it

all in all, a Hot Mess™ trying to live the gucci gang life okay he’s not as bad as he sounds pls love him

#rmintro #( ` ° I 💎 yumi—ooc

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ophexis · 7 years ago

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Can you talk a little about being aromantic and how you came to realise you are?

Ooo hi anon!! ;w;

I put this under a cut cause it’s ended up accidently being a huge wall of text for something that isn’t super interesting to a lot of people but thanks a lot for the ask anon! ;w;

also this is probably not very coherent sorry about that ;w;

(disclaimer: also this is my own personal experiences and does not represent the experience of every single aromantic person on the spectrum)

aromanticism is simply just not feeling or experiencing romantic love.

For me being aromantic is…well nice, cause I didn’t have a word for it before I got in college. It’s also a bit strange. For one a lot of other aromantic people are very into physical intimacy anyway, and I’m….extremely repulsed by the idea of physical intimacy, so even in the aro communities I felt a bit out of place :’D (I eventually stopped looking at aromantic communities completely…it was….i dont really have a word for it aside than alienating)

But it’s also very freeing. I was never really convinced of romance, I went along with the whole ‘someday you’ll find someone’ thing cause….that’s what everybody does right? But nope. I can just be myself, on my own, and live my life to the fullest. No need to force myself to find a guy to spend all my time with, no need to have children….my life is my own, and it will always be. And it’s a nice way to think with how bad my anxiety, social anxiety, lack of self-worth and what everybody tells me is depression making me feel like honestly, I know be a fuckin awful mom. Kids deserve better, and I deserve to live my whole life how I want to. It’s a bit of a selfish way to see things, but I spent most of my childhood basically being owned by my shitty abusive friend who never let me live my life and do my things, and I intend to live for myself from now on.

It’s also a bit alienating in fandom settings. Ships are the most important aspect of a fandom in most of them, shipping drives most of fandoms. Most shipping stuff makes me pretty uncomfortable, from the very aggressive way people push their romantic ships and ideas, and how you basically don’t exist when you don’t really ship anything, and how you know that nobody will ever really enjoy your aromantic headcanons, because “b-but muh ship”. You have people saying how obvious a ship is, that you’re stupid if you don’t see it, but hell you watched the same serie, played the same game, and….never saw any of the romantic subtext. You saw friends being good friends, and never really realised it could be romantic until you stumble on the fandom. I am so oblivious to what people see as romantic subtext TwT; I feel bad sometimes with how people scream IT’S SO OBVIOUS!! IT’S CANON!! and I’m like….idk man. I basically need the author to spell it out for me before I see anything romantic. It’s not because ‘oh no you hate that ship you big meanie so you say they’re just friends!!’, I just legit never saw anything in it that I’d interpret as romantic actions. I’d be really okay with ships if shipping didn’t turn a lot of fans into rabid animals tbh >3>;; I can easily warm up to ships when I stay away from the fandom.

i have a few aro headcanons…Shaundi from Saints Row, Y’sthola in ffxiv, Sailor Mars (her manga personality mostly), Peridot and Lapis (people would hate that one), Rey from Star Wars…and all my ocs, unless specified otherwise, tend to be aromantic by default. Yuri is demiromantic. Towering Hound and Pupuri Puri are aro as fuck.

finding out there was a word for it was very liberating and made me feel like all this discomfort about romance and everything related to it wasn’t me being a lonely weirdo but was just something valid that other people experience as well.

And I still love my friends lots. I love my family. I love all of them very deeply and I care for them and wish them the best. I’ll just never love someone in a romantic way and that’s ok.

——–

and now for boring life story:

I am pretty sure I have always been aromantic (I just never knew that was A Thing before tumblr). It was in a childish way earlier, kinda, but I remember I refused to watch a lot of Disney movies with princesses in them cause I thought they’d just be love stories, and I thought it was boring as heck. I went along with the whole “girls wanna find boyfriends!!” stuff to fit in but I was never really much into the idea?

In high school I never had a crush on anyone, to the exasperation of my friends. My shitty abusive ex friend basically pushed me into the only “romantic” relationship I ever was in, with a guy i met on a Sonic forum (yep). he was a nice dude, but honestly I was never really….like I never felt any different than with a friendship you know? My friends also mocked me endlessly for this relationship so that was eeeeeh…Eventually we fell out of contact and he assumed we weren’t a thing anymore and he went in a relationship with a guy and I kinda found out accidently, it was awkward but then again I was just kinda….”welp i guess that’s that” (also cue my friends mocking me and saying I was such a bad girlfriend I ‘turned him gay’ even tho he was probably bi in the first place anyway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

I always just thought at that point that I’ll just wait and someday “I’ll find someone” cause that’s what everybody tells you no matter how uninterested you are.

Then in college I joined tumblr at some point. I do not remember who reblogged the picture with various orientations on it, including romantic ones, but thanks so much. I didn’t even know there were romantic orientations!! I saw aromantic, and something clicked. Like “holy shit that exists? That’s a thing??” I felt a bit bad initially to grab the label cause im still just a straight cis girl but I read more into it, and into other aro peep’s experiences, and I realised that yep. That’s me, that’s how I’ve been feeling all my life and it’s totally okay if I wanna remain single all my life, if all this shit makes me uncomfortable its not cause im a weirdo.

being aro is a bit like standing on the sidelines while a bunch of people are screaming about how great this one thing is but you’re kinda “meh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯“ about it. Or kinda like when you don’t like booze (I don’t like booze) but everytime you’re at a party everybody’s trying to make you try all the booze “It doesn’t even taste like alcohol you’ll like it!” “oh try this one, I’m sure you’ll like this one”. It’s a bit like that. It probably doesn’t sound nice to people who experience lots of romantic love, but its nice and cozy for me if that makes any sense, and I don’t want to try it. I’ve tried it before, I didn’t like it. I’m done. (this statement applies to both romance and booze lmao)

my current life goals is to live in a nice lil cozy appartment with some kitties, on my own.

#Hai anon!#Ophexis replies to stuff #this got longer than i expected and i hope it makes sense :'D #also im not trying to victimize myself at any point in all of this<#(saying so just in case cause tumblr being tumblr and all)

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