#tbh i didn't think i'd be drawing them tonight

[caughtshrimpin]

just like that

[reds-skull]

Fic recs - oneshots (part 3)

ALRIGHT I'm hoping this is the last oneshot post, since there are a lot of other fics I wanna recommend that don't fall in this category.

This post is like 5x longer than the other ones just because I wanted to finish all of my current oneshot recs and otherwise it will take like 3 more posts. So beware there are a lot more under the cut.

If you're new here, these are all sfw oneshots:

i've dug two graves for us, my dear. by eddie_dxaz - Johnny gets buried alive.

Scotch-Soaked Lips by FreeToWriteForMe - Ghost watches Soap while the team is in a bar.

I owe the hat man money and I don't want to see him by Louffox - Ghost gets drugged and hallucinates while Soap tries to keep both of them alive.

Painting the snow red by Faolamb - Ghost is a wraith and Soap werewolf. Soap loses control and Ghost calls him back.

Mild as May by lambstew4you - Ghost and Soap are on a mission, and they have a talk by the campfire.

Hell or High Water by lambstew4you - Soap gets kidnapped and put in a sensory deprivation tank. He is rescued, but the damage is already done.

Daylight Through The Fog by WeirdTin - Ghost is afraid of letting people in. Soap just wants to love every scar.

i never said i'd be alright (just thought i could hold myself together) by TheLastTheosaurus - Ghost gets injured on a mission with Soap. Without exfil in sight, he hides it. Despite his efforts Soap finds out.

Breathe in, Hold it by Hedgehog_kun - Simon and Johnny are in a relationship. Life is good, for once. But one night Soap comes home angry and drunk, and Ghost can't help but freeze.

How it started, how it's going by Nuria123 - The fic where Ghost thinks he and Soap are already dating (5+1).

heat death by eggtimelads - Soap and Ghost spend an afternoon fending off this relentless heat [relatable tbh].

note to self: drink in moderation by eggtimelads - Ghost gets drunk, does a little pining out loud, and gets his reputation ruined while also getting a boyfriend.

Absolutely by ElizaStyx - 5 times Soap confesses to Ghost in a language he thought Ghost didn't understand, and one time he knows full well Ghost does.

the shroud is made of linen by stars_boy - In which Ghost is interrupted while watching the sunrise.

Lets Go Stargazing For Real Next Time by Trouble_13 - Ghost thought they were getting somewhere, but it feels like they have to restart all over again.

Lonely Hearts Club by Wheezing_Joe - Soap and Rudy accidentally start fake dating. Ghost and Alejandro aren't too pleased with it [this is ghostsoap and alerudy, so it's twice as good]

Night Has Always Pushed Up Day by Sillililli - Ghost gets injured and is stuck in a hospital, when they bring in a blind Soap. They're forced to share a room.

dying all the way back to the root by Magpie (QuickSilverFox3) - Soap is separated from Ghost, but Ghost can still hear his voice. He just needs to find him before someone else does.

i fear you will know me but most of all i fear i will never know you by rocketnintendo - Soap hides the extent of his injuries. Ghost finds out and is gentle.

My Heart Leapt From Me by Macabre_Flower - A pipe bursts above Soap's bed in the middle of the night. Ghost offers to help.

Palimpsest by Blackbird_flyaway - Ghost loses all memory from the last 3 years, including all memory of Soap.

The way his feet strike the earth by Blackbird_flyaway - Soap puts on a blindfold and gets kissed as part of a drinking game only it becomes a lot more than that.

i need you to hurt me back instead by TheLastTheosaurus - 5 times Ghost needed a hug, and the one time his got one.

Figure Study by 002405 - Ghost asks Soap to draw him like one of his French girls. Things devolve from there.

love me despite by TheLastTheosaurus - Ghost needs rest. Soap helps him get it.

no better version i could pretend to be tonight by TheLastTheosaurus - Soap can't sleep. he goes to Ghost.

Wash your mouth out with soap by Red_Clegane [the one and only] - Soap is reminded how he got his call sign and Ghost helps him put the pieces back together.

sunday morning (rain is falling) by wellyesbutactuallyno - Soap wants to learn more about Ghost. Ghost lets him.

The Haircut by thevalesofanduin - Soap's hair is too long. Ghost helps him cut it.

On the nights you feel outnumbered (I'll be out there, somewhere) by Brigadier - Ghost feels more irritable than usual and gets involved in a bar fight.

I want to crack open your ribs and crawl in the space left behind (Je veux me lover au creux de ton creur et ne jamais repartir) by flaminpumpkin - Simon ends up having to drag his drunk sergeant back to base and finds himself in a sticky situation because he's too smitten with the man.

Bloody Delirium by GnawingAtMyEyes - Soap gets gravely injured and suffers from blood loss delirium.

Tell Me a Secret by resonatingkitty - Ghost asked Soap to tell him a secret one evening at a bar and what Soap tells him is not what he expected to hear.

Never Hide This (From Me Again) by resonatingkitty - during a mission, Soap gets nicked and doesn't report it to Ghost. Ghost doesn't take it well.

Bruised Peach by Phiunzirus - After their latest mission, Soap's right arm looks like a bruised peach. What happens when Ghost accidentally grabs it a bit too hard?

Kiss me once, then kiss me twice, then kiss me once again (it's been a long, long time) by Angelicasdean - Soap's been home for weeks now, but he's still missing the last piece of the puzzle. Thankfully, it's scheduled to return today.

Forbidden by eddie_dxaz - Ghost comes to terms with his feelings for Soap and tries to fight them. Unsuccessfully.

The Maskmaker by ElizaStyx - Soap finds Ghost working on a new mask.

Cat Dad by ElizaStyx - One day a little kitten appears at the 141 HQ and Soap falls in love. Too bad the kitty only likes Ghost.

Blind date with a book by Nuria123 - Ghost is a famous anonymous writer and Soap loves his books. They fall in love.

Recovery by Nuria123 - Soap and Ghost meet after being medically discharged at a rehab facility. Soap volunteers and Ghost is newly admitted. [this is one of the few fics to make me actually sob hard it's so extremely good]

can't keep johnny down by Wheezing_Joe - Soap loses commes on a mission and presumed dead. After finding his way back to base he's surprised by how much he's been missed.

red woven confessions by wayfaredsoldier - Soap got he and Ghost wishing bracelets in an attempt to grow closer to him and got far more than he expected.

made a bed with apathy (years worth of dust and neglect) by aetherealmoss - Soap gets triggered by someone who looks too much like his painful past, and Ghost is there to help him through it [TW SA, rape and child abuse on this one]

Safe With Me by Wixiany - Soap who is in an abusive relationship befriends Ghost when he moved into the neighborhood. His boyfriend accuses them of cheating and Ghost is blocked for several days until Soap shows up in the middle of the night.

snuffed by crown_twist - Johnny really, really doesn't like cigarettes. Ghost didn't know.

Choice by achievement_hunteresss - Shepherd captures the 141. He offers them a deal. He will let the other person go unharmed, if you shoot yourself in front of them.

tags by achievement_hunteresss - Soap asks for help with detangling his dogtags. Ghost accidentally unburies Simon.

Precipice by Islenthatur - Soap dies and has to choose (dw it's surprisingly not mcd)

Coven (Scheherazade) by basgijr - Ghost can't sway an overwhelming feeling that something isn't right. Soap is a werewolf that stinks of wet dog and also love (Ghost is a vampire). [this one I found from a Tumblr post that I lost]

sullen by rottin - Sparring goes a little wrong.

Lessen the Load by Hammy1o1 - Price had to talk Ghost down from suicide a few times. Things change when Soap joins the taskforce. [obviously TW for suicide]

Aaaand that's all of them! And my god there's a lot. Next post I'm considering giving a list of writers I like (aka have a lot of fics that I like so I save their name instead of individual fics), which will be one post since there's not too many. After that we can finally get to the longer fics!

[outeremissary]

9 People You Want to Know Better

Tagged by @arendaes, thanks :)

Three Ships

I feel like I always list the same stuff on this section, haha. Same time, I can't really seem to think of anything better right now when I'm trying. Maybe it's just my energy tonight. Uh, I can just list what I consider my main pairs in the last three games with romances I've played...? I guess?

Balthazar + Tristian. Or also with Vio. Doodling them a lot lately... I miss them.

Carmen + Arushalae. There's a Galfrey situation that intersects with this as well but I think living with someone goes a long way towards winning a love triangle. Whatever the hell winning means here. Tbh everyone loses

Asperia/Kasander + unfortunately, that archduke I really do want dead for real. Once wasn't enough.

Last Song

Catch Me If You Can - Jhariah (Spotify). Someone I drew something for on Art Fight had this listed as a character theme, so I've been looping it a lot... it's really good. I really should listen to more of Jhariah's music.

Last Movie

Hm. I.... don't know? I haven't been watching a lot of movies. I wanted to see I Saw the TV Glow, but before I knew it had left theaters. I'd like to watch movies again, I think.

Currently Reading

When I remember that I should be reading, Wuthering Heights. I've actually never read it before. I got bored halfway through Jane Eyre when I was 13 and lost all interest in gothic romances after that. ^^;;

Currently Watching

Akuma-kun! The 2023 one on Netflix. It's the show my friend and I are watching together right now. He insisted I had to watch it because it had an evil angel... we saw the angel today!! I'm happy. Homoerotic, fourteen year old fujoshi Emi would have totally lost it for this.

Currently Eating

Nothing. Getting hungry again though.

Currently Craving

I dunno... something fried? In the abstract, a little more self assurance.

Favorite Color

Blue. Deep blue. I've always been fond of the Copenhagen blue that I've used for Caina's scarf and one of Balthazar's coats, and the indigo I do a lot of my lines with.

Favorite Flavor

Chocolate.

Current Obsession

Anxiously checking the Art Fight website tbh. It's not good for me. I just keep getting worried that I've somehow made art that someone really hates of their character, or that I'm putting a lot into projects that no one will ever see. Haha.

Last Thing I Googled

.... well, now that we're at this point in this, it's Copenhagen blue. Because I wanted to check if it was a real name ^^;;

Favorite Season

Fall. It's got the best temperatures and most consistent weather. I like when the leaves change as well. The dry leaves on the ground are really comforting.... they make good sounds and are nice to lay in.

Skill I'd Like to Learn

Painting. Watercolors, ideally. Or digital art.

Best Advice

Jeez, I don't know a lot of life advice. I guess the best art advice I know is "draw whatever makes you want to keep drawing." Recently an artist I really respect also said something like "when you're starting out, just go ahead and copy whatever you like. Don't trace because you'll learn slower, but if there's something you like, try your best to imitate it." I think that can be good advice too. I guess my personal advice is also "Just do it however you know you can get it done." I used to get really hung up on doing things the "right" way in order to finish them, and because it took so long and I felt so pressured on the later steps I never finished anything. I hardly ever got to what I considered the halfway mark then. It didn't make me feel good about what I was doing. So I started doing things messier and more haphazard, whatever would get to the end I wanted to reach fastest. And I think I grew a lot more like that. I definitely drew a lot more art I was proud of and happy to show other people. I guess that also loops around to advice I've heard somewhere else though ^^;; Just to do the parts of the process that you want to finish. Your sketch can be your final lines if you hate doing line art, who cares. You can learn a way to do it like that.

We've hit the limit of how many times I can tag people on posts in a day without feeling very anxious unfortunately, so if anyone wants to be my guest etc. but I don't have it in me right now ^^;;

[shiro-0197]

You're so sweet what?? I'd write you a song too but I somehow suck at stringing melodies together 😣😣 they sound so awkward, I wish I had the talent to write songs :]

omg I remember that moment!! I was so shooketh, like damn, he's pretty strong owo, but omg you're just brilliant, don't be surprised :P I'm so proud to be your friend 😣💖 and I'm so proud of you in general. You're just all the good things rolled into one. Sweet? Soft? Adorable as fuck? A total genius? Yes—

Blondes are geniuses. I Stan. Oops, it kinda seems like you're my type, sir— kindly marry me? Skjdksjsks I think even despite the headaches and stuff, you're so intelligent, and i'm in awe of you, truly. You are one smart cookie :> (did you see what I did there? :P)

3 o clock? XD he's up at the oddest times, just like I am ✌️ my sleep schedule? ✨ Nonexistent ✨ Omg yes that would be such a good idea!! Please send me a pic if you do!! I'd love to see it. I draw bunny ears for my BTS bias, Jungkook, pretty often, because he loves joking around on his live streams and saying he's actually a rabbit and not a human (aight babe, so you're a furry—) but it's pretty cute >.<

I've had the weirdest obsession with catpeople recently 😔IDEK why tho the memes are cringey asf sjhssjak.

Yeah she's a firecracker, and she runs hot and cold. Sometimes she's the sweetest, and other times she's like this; 😶😶😶😶

I didn't like her either. Stuff got so explicit when she was on screen I had to fast forward it all xD but yeah every single character was so well thought out. I didn't expect to love Arisu as much as I do, because he was such a slob in the beginning, but I love how he's gone through character development. Aaah okok!! I love AOT so I was just curious hehe.

A guy who would help me?? Skin my useless board?? Were you?? Made for me?? 😔🤚 Tho those mfs better watch out because I'm scary when I'm angry.

nooo awww that's so cute. Picturing you smiling?? Serotonin📈📈📈 I usually wait till I'm free before I reply, and when I did it at Abigail's house she peeked over my shoulder and was like "omg such long messages, you must really love him" (I do indeed love you very much! and, if the messages are too long feel free to shorten them, idm 👉👈💖)

Thank you for the rec!! I'm gonna listen to it now. I love you too, my precious Shiro. Sleep well, sweet dreams. <333

—a tired individual

Relatable, I tried to do something in LMMS, but I have absolutely no knowledge in music theory and etc😭😭

Me too, I was like... sir?!?!??

Girl🥺🥺 I'm also vv honored to be your friend!!! Cuz like hello you're so awesome, you're smart and sweet and responsible and hardworking and !!!!!!!!!!!

Dnnsjrjsj when's our wedding🤨😻? Heheh I'm glad you think that🥺 tbh I would admit that if it werent for the fact that I cant stand history xd

Hahah, yeah! What's bothering me is that like... aren't you guys supposed to wake up early? Kuro wakes up at 6 am even though his bedtime ranges from 10pm to 5am, and there is absolutely no indicator of what's it gonna be tonight. If you'd only see his eye circles ;-;

Will do!!! Also, that's funny-- I always say I'm a chicken for absolutely no reason. They're so pretty? And tasty- ok I am so sorry XD

IM GONNA FIGHT HER CUZ NP WAY HES MINE🤬🤬🤬 WKKRKSKDKAKZK IM KIDDING KIDDING JQJFJSJDJ

True true, I watched those scenes like "ma'am.... pls". Also what she did to Chota was a bitch move, cuz she expected him to choose her because she let him fuck her🤨😡

True, Arisu wasnt the best character at first, but then I saw how damn good he was at strategies, and I was like. Goodbye😍

I'm also pretty intimidating on my own, and when I'm angry I'm like "😶" and my friends told me that I look like an angel of death I was like🤨🤨🤨🤨 that was funny XD

Hehehhe I love you too!!<33 Idk why I always feel embarrased when people see my messages, even though they're completely normal, like "omg you saw me message someone😩😩😩" I have no idea why that happens XD (trust me, I always try my best to fully respond to everything, because I'll be damned if I skip something, and if I do its mostly because I probably miss or forget to😔)

I hope you liked it!! It's my favorite song from them, alongside Never Meant To Know. Their songs are so good. Too bad I dont understand what they're about most of the time... that's why I love them, their lyrics confuse me bit they sound so good, and I really respect them for creating something like that. Cuz I could NEVER😭😩

I love you so much!! Thank you for your message<33💕💘💕💖💓💓💘💞💝💞💘💓💖💕💕💘💓

[punkscowardschampions]

Chloé & Buster

Chloé: You coming to Abi's party tonight? Buster: No Chloé: Why not! Gonna be such a laugh Buster: It's not really any of your business, is it, Chlo, but let's be honest even if I was in the country, we both know it wouldn't be a laugh Buster: Abi's probably fucked up already Buster: And that's only one of the reasons why it's a no Chloé: Ooh, someone's moody! Chloé: Unlucky you're out of town babes 😂 Chloé: Family time, is it? Yawn Buster: Fuck off, Chlo Buster: There are other things to do besides annoying my sister, you should try it Chloé: Not in her inbox, am I? Chloé: 😷 Chloé: As if you're doing anything worth talking about Buster: Neither am I so how in the hell would I know, like? Buster: Why do you care so much still what I'm doing? Buster: Sort it out, babe. The who ain't you, but there's plenty of lads in your postcode who would Chloé: Just inviting you to a bash don't get wild about it Chloé: Never see you out these days, not YOUR postcode anymore, no? Chloé: Fake girlfriend still, is it? 💔 Buster: And why do you reckon that is, babe? Buster: Fault's yours not mine. Stop inviting me out, yeah? I'm not here for it. Or you Buster: I'm not sorry I'm busy with my actual girlfriend Chloé: What have I done! Chloé: Nothing but nice to you, and your sister, for that matter Buster: If that's what you think I ain't got the time to change your mind Buster: Nor write you a list, like Chloé: 🙄 The theatrics! Chloé: So, what's she like then? Must be something if you're willing to leave here for it Buster: Draw your own conclusions Buster: I'm not talking about her to you Chloé: Cute 💘 Chloé: Though you don't need to talk that game to me Chloé: Might be able to convince a girl outside the postcode that you're #loyal babes but no need or way that'll wash with me 😏 Buster: Shut up Buster: Maybe the reason I had to go out of the postcode was less to do with me and more about the type of girl there, you ever thought on that? Chloé: Omg Chloé: Admitting you can't handle us? Buster: You wish Buster: It wasn't a compliment, babe Chloé: Whatevs Chloé: You're looking good anyway Buster: Course I am Buster: Is there anything else I can actually do for you or what? 'Cause there's plenty my girlfriend can do for me if we're done here Chloé: If you wanna make me jealous Chloé: so many better ways to go about it Buster: Please Buster: Don't flatter yourself, honestly Chloé: Who's this??? Chloé: [Rio's post] Buster: Your subtlety is astounding Buster: Your sleuthing needs some work though, clearly Chloé: It's on my feed, I ain't ashamed Buster: Give it a double tap and move on, babe Chloé: Yeah, don't think she's your type Chloé: Maybe your sister's, she's always commenting hmm Buster: Like you know anything about mine or my sister's type of girl Chloé: Getting warmer, am I? Buster: In the sense you're getting more desperate, yeah Buster: If this turns you on that's an issue for you to worry about, not me Chloé: Please Chloé: it's fun isn't it Buster: No Buster: If I tell you who she is will you go away? Chloé: Sure! Buster: She's one of my many cousins, alright Chloé: Oh Chloé: That explains it Chloé: Disappointing but don't need to tell you that Buster: Off you go then Chloé: No Chloé: I thougt you were going to tell me who your girlfriend is Buster: Why the fuck would I do that? Chloé: Why would I care who your skanky cousin is? Buster: 'Cause you're obsessed with me apparently Buster: And don't call her that Chloé: Like you care babes Buster: I obviously do or else I wouldn't waste my breath telling you to shut up Chloé: You've said worse about all of 'em Chloé: Oh my Gosh Chloé: Just realised who she is Buster: I can whatever I want. Who the fuck are you? Buster: Congrats Chloé: She is, isn't she? Chloé: The one everyone's slept with Chloé: How shaming Buster: It'd sound more sincere if you hadn't slept with most of Chelsea, babe Buster: One rule for you, yeah? Chloé: I live here, I didn't fly in for the experience Chloé: Why was she even here? Buster: Maybe if you upped your own game the lads wouldn't need her to fly in Chloé: How can you talk about your own family like that you sicko Buster: 😂 Buster: You do have a moral code of some sort then? Buster: Take it up with your boy besties, they're the ones who like to chat about it Chloé: More than you do, clearly Chloé: Doesn't that just make you want to die? How mortifying Buster: It makes me wanna kill them Buster: Thanks for asking Chloé: As if you're any better 😂 Buster: I don't sleep with any girls they care about, do I? Chloé: Yeah right Chloé: Family man now, are you babes? Chloé: Take it up with her if you're so close now Buster: Whatever, Chlo Chloé: More touchy about this than you were with your own sister Chloé: Guess there was no risk of all your mates getting on her Buster: Exactly Buster: And you've missed your chance too so no worries there Chloé: You're so vile Buster: Like you'd be above fucking my sister? Okay babe Chloé: 🤢 Chloé: I'd sooner drink bleach Chloé: thank you Buster: I'm sure she would too Buster: Shame there was none in my glass that night at the party, like Chloé: Sorry to disappoint whatever incest kink you've got going on Chloé: but nah babes Buster: Why? You ain't been sorry about being a let down in any other way Chloé: Shut up Chloé: I was wasted and you're not giving a second chance Buster: If it was only how unfuckable you are, I'd let you off Chloé: You certainly managed Chloé: Trust me Buster: As I've only got your word on it, I have to Chloé: How else do you expect me to prove it? Chloé: DNA test? Buster: I don't care Buster: It happened and it ain't again. End of story Chloé: Whatever you say Buster: There ain't nothing else to say Buster: Unless you've got something you desperately wanna add? Chloé: Just talking to James Chloé: he reckons you're well weird about your cousin Buster: Says the lad who told me in graphic detail what fucking her was like? Okay Chloé: Didn't do it for you? Chloé: Poor boy 😂 Buster: But I'm the vile one, sure Chlo Chloé: Calm down, it's only bants Chloé: You're sooooo serious now Buster: Serious about how much I want you to fuck off out of my inbox Chloé: Can't handle it now or what? Chloé: There's a reason, I know Buster: I ain't never wanted to handle you, babe Chloé: Obvs not Chloé: not related to you am I Chloé: how country 😂 Buster: Fuck off Buster: Excuse me if you slagging off my family isn't a huge turn on for me, like Chloé: Why's it matter Chloé: Not gonna say it to their face am I Buster: You literally did say shit to my sister though Buster: Already forgotten or what? Chloé: No I never Chloé: Mads tagged her Chloé: then everyone else did Chloé: it wasn't me Buster: Back in the day in was all you though Chloé: She say that did she? Chloé: I was the only one who even tried to be her friend Chloé: not my fault she was in love with me Buster: Bullshit Buster: You ain't her type either, babe Buster: Get over yourself Chloé: Hmm not how I remember it Chloé: not like you were paying any attention so what would you know tbh Buster: I've heard it from her now Buster: Not just in Dublin seeing my girlfriend, as you've already worked out Chloé: Thrilled for you both, I'm sure Buster: Act like it then Buster: Leave me alone Buster: And it goes without saying, my sister as well Chloé: Well you see I can't Chloé: Hate to burst your bubble, of course Buster: Yeah you can Chloé: I really can't Chloé: As fun as this has been I have some news Buster: Go on then Buster: Sooner you've said it, sooner you can go Chloé: Ha Chloé: I'm pregnant Buster: What the fuck, Chlo? Even for you that's low Buster: Still going to Abi's party though, yeah? Buster: Bullshit Chloé: God, I can still have fun and A GLASS Chloé: beside the point Chloé: [pics of tests] Buster: Well yeah, you can do whatever you want until you prove it's my kid Chloé: How do you expect me to do that Chloé: and I know it's yours, thank you very much Buster: You might, but I don't Buster: And forgive me if I don't automatically take your word for it after all the shit you've said and done, like Chloé: Well if you weren't being so difficult Buster: Me? Buster: Fuck that Buster: Get a prenatal DNA and get back to me or wait until the kid is born, do it and get back to me Chloé: Wow Chloé: Class act Chloé: That's going to require a bit of cooperation, babes Buster: All you need is a blood sample or mouth swab Buster: I'll give you either Chloé: Done this before, have you? Chloé: Jesus Christ Chloé: it's a child, your child Buster: Not as far I know yet Buster: You having this convo with James and the rest of them too, are you? Chloé: Fuck off Chloé: No Chloé: and don't you dare tell ANYONE Buster: Like I want them knowing about it Buster: Whether it's my kid or not Buster: I've gotta tell my parents though so Chloé: You can tell them Chloé: Mine don't know yet Buster: You should tell them too Chloé: Will you tell them with me? Buster: Okay Chloé: Yay good Chloé: When are you back? Buster: I was gonna skip school but Buster: When were you planning on telling them? Chloé: I don't know, doesn't matter Buster: Of course it does Buster: You need to decide what you're gonna do Buster: They can help you Chloé: What? Chloé: I know what I'm doing Chloé: I've already been shopping with the girls Buster: I thought you didn't want anyone to know? Chloé: I don't want YOU telling people it could be anyone else's Chloé: when it couldn't, how rude Buster: So you've told your friends but not your parents? Buster: Come on, Chlo Buster: Have you even been to the doctors or anything? Chloé: Yeah they'll just fuss and wanna know things Chloé: how cringe Chloé: No point yet Chloé: I think Chloé: it's like 12 weeks scan, yeah? Buster: You can get DNA done at 9 weeks Buster: I've just looked it up Chloé: How long's it been? Buster: If you don't know that how are you so sure it's my kid? Chloé: I haven't slept with anyone else for ages Chloé: if you must know Buster: It is kind of worth knowing, yeah Buster: Fuck's sake Chloé: Don't be funny with me Chloé: I just know alright Buster: Don't tell me how to be Buster: I asked you after if you needed me to take you to the pill and you said no Chloé: Well I thought I was fine, obviously Buster: Well, now neither of us are, obviously Chloé: I'm good Chloé: Drama Chloé: It'll be nice, if you let it Buster: Nice? Buster: Grow up, Chlo Chloé: Well I'm not getting rid of it Chloé: you've done it now, deal with it Buster: Like I said, when you prove to me that it's my baby, I will Chloé: Fine, I will Chloé: you'll see Chloé: anyway, I'm going out, gotta get my nails done for tonight Buster: I'm glad you've got your priorities in order, babe Buster: Jesus Christ Chloé: What? Chloé: I can't do anything, I told you I've got loads of stuff for it Chloé: keeping it at Lindseys Buster: Don't go the party Buster: That's what you could do Chloé: I'm not going to sit at home on a saturday night Chloé: i'm not 40 Buster: Clearly. 40 year old's don't tend to get knocked up accidentally as a rule Chloé: Menopause'll do that to you babe Buster: That's not the point Buster: We need to talk about this you can't just ruin my life and then go do a toast with your friends Chloé: Me ruin yours? I didn't impregnate myself Buster: You're ruining your own by not thinking this through Chloé: I'm not a baby killer Chloé: sorry about it Buster: I don't even have words for how stupid that sounds Chloé: I can't believe you're trying to make me get an abortion Buster: I'm not trying to make you do anything except use your brain Buster: What about uni? Are you still gonna go or what? Buster: Are you gonna get your own place or stay with your mum and dad? Chloé: Wow, 20 questions! Buster: This isn't a game Buster: Fucking hell Chloé: I'm having a baby Chloé: that's my plan Buster: And then what? Chloé: Be a mum? Buster: You know how hard that's gonna be, yeah? Chloé: I think I'll manage babe Chloé: I'm not an idiot Buster: You're an idiot if you think it's easy Chloé: How hard can it be Buster: Very Buster: Babies can't do fuck all and kids aren't much better Chloé: Yeah, I know how to feed it and change it Chloé: Abi's got a baby sister she's so cute Buster: Good for her Buster: I bet she ain't doing the night feeds while her parents sleep, is she Chloé: Whatever Buster: Don't fucking whatever me, Chlo Chloé: Don't you talk to me like that Buster: I can't talk to you right now if you're gonna be like this Chloé: That's good because you're making me late Buster: Fine Buster: Bye then Chloé: 👋

[lol-despair]

.

[shiro-0197]

AKHDKSJSK aw babe noooooo 😣😣😣😭😔 I hate it when that happens, it happens so often whenever I'm replying my friend Tilli. Thank you for taking the time to rewrite it tho 👉👈

Aaah thank u!! I'm pretty smart right before important exams, like some sorta Isaac Newton wannabe, and the after the exams I'm just all like "hahaha apple go brrr :D" but yes omg I couldn't agree more. Intelligent characters are so attractive, and it's usually the blonde bbys 😣😣 I have a thing for the blondes skdjsksk.

oh so you're in the eleventh grade now? And ahhh I TOLD YOU. ANIME PROTAGONIST VIBES INDEED !! This radiates Assassination classroom vibes, where the odd class is the literal best :> y'all are special indeed.

AND OMG YOU GUYS ARE SO TALENTED WTF 😳💖💖💖 Its so pretty, I'm just crying. catboys. CATBOYS ARE SO FUCKIN' AMAZING I LOVE CATBOYS. AND CATGIRLS. Grrrrr purr purr 😭💖 my best friend sends me catboy memes wait I'll send you my favourite one :>

of course I did!! My other best friend threatened to murder me and feed my body to her cats if I didn't, because she's been so obsessed with Chishiya lately 😃🔫 gotta love girls named "Angel" who don't talk like angels at all. But anyways yes omg yes 😭😭 I love usagi and Kuina so much I'd low-key die for them they're so perfect in every way. And yes!! I couldn't stop gushing when I watched Kuina's backstory LIKE YES!! YOU GO GIRL <3 she's such a badass, and wonderful woman. And I love Usagi too, she's so selfless and capable, she reminds me so much of Mikasa Ackerman (have you watched AOT?😭)

yeah it went well and thankfully it will be one of the last of the year, if things go well. I'll only see my board of assholes directors next year, and then will be irl so I ONLY PRAY I don't go ballistic on sight and murder them all or something 😃🔫 (you won't even be there to hold me back, sigh~😔)

Anyways! I LOVE YOU and I low-key adore you sm too :))) you'd better be smiling rn, sir— grrr 😾😾💖

—your fave catgirl enthusiast 😼✌️

Ofc!! I'd write a whole album for you if I knew how to write songs🤨😙💕💕

Hahah, relatable!! During exams, I feel like I didnt even need to revise anything, then after exams I look at the screenshots of my answers and I'm like. Did I fucking write that? Kinda like the Zenitsu moment when he was trying to protect the kid, where he slayed the demon after he passed out😭

Ikrrr blondes are lowkey geniuses and as a blonde I am confused because what the hell do we have the smart juice instead of hair grease . I think, if it werent for the traumatic experiences and eternal headaches, I'd probably be a megamind. But, exhaustion and developed memory problems suck 😔

HEHEH IM GLAD YOU LIKE IT:D Kuro sent me that sketch in the middle of the night, mf went like "excuse moi I need this colored in three minutes" I WAS ASLEEP SIR CHILL😩😩😭

I also love catpeople😍 sounds weird but uhh we're not exclusive😭 either way, I also wanna draw Usagi wuth bunny ears, cuz y'know, Usagi = rabbit🐰

Ajjdjsjxjajd carboy memes are so cringey its funny😭😩😩 I love them ahjejsjxj

Yooo evil🤭 but she also watched AIB??? Respectable. Yeah, people named Angel are always the exact opposite💀💀 Tbh I get where shes coming from, cuz Chishiya Shuntaro🥰😍❤😍😍💖🥰🥰💘💖💖🥵🤤

ME TOO the characters are literally so wonderful. Tbh I was so surprised when I got to know, like, all of them, because, having every girl being best girl? Impressive. Well, maybe except the girl from first 3 episodes. Didn't really like her😔 I havent watched AOT yet, but I've seen some memes and it looks good, so im hoping to watch it soon:))

Ohh, good to hear. Dont worry, I'd find no reason to really hold you back. Might even lend a hand~

Love you too!!! Trust me, I'm always smiling when responding to your messages, and I'm glad Kuro doesnt see this, because he'd just spam me with "simp *pointing finger*" memes every time😭😭😭

By the way, have you listened to Tally Hall? If not, I reccomend "Fate of the stars", it's such a good song. It's kinda 7 minutes long though, but it's worth it. It makes me feel like I'm about to drift off to space and sleep.

I hope you rest well tonight, Ari-chan💖💖❤💘💘❤💞❤💞❤💝❤💞❤💓💞❤💞❤💞💖❤💘💘💖💘💖💞💓💘💕

[one-abuse-survivor]

Update below the cut. Please heed the trigger warnings in the tags before reading.

@fire-fira thank you so much for the kind words, hugs are always appreciated. I'm definitely going to need to take several mental health days after today... I'll try my hardest to be gentle with myself the next few days. (Please don't feel obligated to interact again just because I tagged you ❤️)

So, today was the day. And I'm honestly so drained physically and mentally from it I can barely hold my phone. I got most of the stuff I wanted to take with me (including some things she didn't want me to take, like my childhood drawings, so, uh, let's hope she doesn't notice? Lmao).

I specifically asked her over WhatsApp to give me space and not talk to me while I was there, but, oh shocker (/s), she completely ignored that and followed me and my friend and girlfriend everywhere, bossing us around and talking so much I couldn't even think over her incessant ramble. She kept showing me stuff, specifically stuff she bought me or stuff I made for her as a kid, and reminding me of when "I still loved her" and shit. She threw it in my face that I didn't want to take the stuff she'd bought me after I'd already left her house. She told me I was really upsetting my grandpa by never talking to him (which I don't because he's essentially an abuse apologist). She yelled at me several times to not take anything without asking her first. I was expecting the guilt-tripping, but I honestly wasn't expecting her to outright yell at me in front of people. I ended up asking her to leave the room, and when she didn't I just left myself and went to a different room, and this happened several times without her getting the hint she was upsetting me. Or maybe not caring, idk.

At least the furniture was completely rearranged, so I wasn't forced to remember how it looked when I was living there. That was a nice surprise.

But... my cat was there. He was in the garden. My mother said she hasn't let him inside the house since 2019. He's basically been roaming the garden and the village for years, extremely neglected. He was very wounded and bleeding in many places and looked severely neglected. I barely even looked at him, it was too much. But my girlfriend took pictures of him, which I saw, and I'm scared I'm going to have nightmares about them tonight.

When I asked my mother what she was planning on doing with the cat when she moved out, she said she was thinking of sacrificing him. I don't think I've hated her this much in a really long time. I told her not to touch him and that I'd take care of everything. I'm going to get in contact with my town's rescue next week to see what we can do together to help him, because I can't even keep him. I'll still probably have to go back to that house to pick him up myself—that is if he even remembers me enough to trust me. I didn't want to get close to him today because I was already going through so much, so I don't know. He seemed to be okay with my girlfriend getting close, at least? (she's really good with cats)

Right now, I'm just hoping I can sleep tonight, tbh. Carrying so many boxes and crouching and the physical tension have all made my chronic pain flare so much even just lying down flat on my back in bed is extremely painful atm, even after taking pain meds.

Ugh, I'm all over the place. I can't wait to go back to ignoring her and going on with my life, safely away from her world. Even my friend and girlfriend felt mentally drained and needed to recover after spending just 3 hours around her. She's such a fucking exhausting person to be around. If nothing else, this experience was a really good reminder of why I have PTSD. Just the idea that I was under her care as a child is shocking and infuriating to me right now.

Personal post, please don't reblog

So. My mother sold her house. The house where I grew up in. The house where she abused me. The house where I made some of the best and worst memories of my life. The house that felt like a dream when I was a kid and like a suffocating prison when I was a teenager.

And like, I knew this was coming. It's been months since she put it on sale. It's also been 4 years since the last time I stepped foot inside it or went anywhere near its vicinity. But I'm still finding it overwhelmingly hard to process. Ever since I found out she'd sold it, I've been having these really vivid "nightmares" where I just. Idk. I open a drawer in the kitchen and stare at the exact cutlery we used to have in that house, down to the tiniest details. Or I'm lying in my bed and the lightbulbs around me start flickering and I realise they're placed in the exact same spots as they were in my childhood bedroom.

And I think this whole deal has made me realise I... miss that house? I miss the garden, and my toys, and my silly magazine posters, and the trees, and I miss my pets and my neighbours. I think up until this point I hadn't allowed myself to separate the terror and trauma I feel toward my mother from the fondness and love I used to feel for the house when I was a kid, and realising I still love that house in some way now that she's sold it feels like a slow-motion punch to the gut.

It doesn't help that my mother texted me saying she's moving out in two weeks and she wants me to go and say goodbye to the house/pick up the last of my stuff. It doesn't help because I said yes, because I still have books and pictures and documents and old toys I want to have in my possession, but I don't know how I'm going to process stepping back into that place after so long just to... never see it again.

I mean, what if my cat is around and he doesn't remember me? What if I suddenly remember details about the house I was finally starting to forget? What if I burst into tears and she's around and sees me crying? What if I ruin the songs I listen to in the car on my way there for myself? What if she tries to talk to me or guilt-trip me by reminding me of good memories from that house? (I know she probably won't, because I'm bringing several people with me, but still).

Idk. Half of me feels like I need to commit every single corner of the house to memory just so I don't ever forget about my beloved childhood home where I made so many happy memories. The other half of me wishes I could wear distortion glasses the whole time just so I do not accurately perceive a single detail about the house that may sneak into my nightmares and haunt me for months or even years.

I just feel like I'm going to need to do a lot of mourning about this. I feel like I'm already mourning, right now, just from the thought of going there in a few days. But at the same time, I really want to go, because I know I'd regret it all my life if I didn't. I'd especially regret not grabbing my photo albums and my childhood books while I still could (however many of them are left after all these years). There are so many things I couldn't bring with me when I left because I didn't want her to notice them missing and suspect, and I know she's given away and thrown out a lot of them, but part of me still hopes that at least some of the things I want to take with me are still where I left them.

My head is a big, big mess right now.

(I typed this out just to express myself; I'm not looking for any answers to my questions or any alternatives or solutions. But if anyone has kind words or any advice on how to make this process easier, I'd appreciate them a lot ❤️)