#tasteful irony that the guy who would want to help can’t do that bc of a mistake he made for love.

[theoldkyokodied]

If you follow my main you had to know this was coming… anyway. Enjoy these bloodweave doodles :)

[luffyvace]

Perona x male reader

This might be more accurate to pre time skip perona bc I’m watching impel down arc, hope you all don’t mind 💗

I just really like her and wanted to write for her since she’s underrated <3 (plus from the poll)

Idk how you and perona met or when but y’all together soo !! 🤷‍♀️

if your dumb/dense- (lol) like zoro or luffy she’s gonna go insane

she loves you..! but your just…..a bit slow..

no matter how through her instructions are you always somehow end up doing the opposite

she has to do a lot of things herself which triggers her because she considers herself a princess

she gets mad at you, but not mad like how should would to bearsy, more so a ‘you can’t do anything with out me 🤦‍♀️‘ typa mad

in fact she usually ends up helping YOU out

”I’m only doing this because I love you, you know??”

she says that while pouting all the time

but if you return the favor by helping her carry something heavy, giving her a kiss on the cheek, or just sincerely thanking her?

shes a blushing mess in denial 💝

if your smart !!

She finally has someone that gets her and is on her side!!

she makes you spend lots of time with her

picking out what outfit she should wear

watching the sunset

she does all sorts of romantic stuff with you <3

(zoro gets lost and crashes your dates 🙂)

if your on the slow side you, zoro and mihawk drive perona up a wall fr

shes the only female and her boyfriend isn’t even on her side?!🧍‍♀️

I mean you are, but it’s just not the same if you don’t get her

and if your intelligent you help her keep zoro under raps

and she makes you help defend her in arguments

LOL

perona likes to pick your outfits

dw she has a great taste in fashion, she’s very stylish

she puts you in black and your favorite color

so that you two are kinda matching

ngl she’s pretty sentimental

one moment she loves the crap out of you and the next she’s attacking you with hollows

ok I know that seems more moody or bipolar or smth but it’s just because she’s sensitive!

it’s more so that what you say affects her deeply because she loves you

so if you choose the wrong dress and you say it’s cuter than the one she was hoping you’d choose, she’s gonna think you think she’s ugly

(don’t ask me how that translates she’s overthinking it)

Your less prone to this if your average smarts or above

but again if your on the slow side, your love is gonna seem like push and pull

She makes you help her with everything, whatever she needs

and she’s kinda clingy, she always has to have you around

at least in the same room, if your not she looks for you

its not because she’s insecure or anything she just likes being in your presence

If she wants to reorganize a room? She’s instructing you and your doing the actual work

she wants the dishes done? Why didn’t you wash them??

(you make a point that she’s the one who used a crap ton trying to cook and she ends up helping you)

she’s fair for the most part though she may be a bit bossy..

perona’s love languages are quality time and physical touch

(lol physical touch is irony but anyway)

yeah I’ve pretty much been mentioning quality time throughout this whole thing

she basically just loves to be around you, doing anything with you whatever!

she doesn’t like to be bored though so you guys are gonna have to figure out fun things to do

playing hide and seek is always fun with her!

she’s really good at it but sometimes you feel like her devil fruit is cheating 😒

you’ve found her a couple times though!

she was proud of you but also kinda upset at the same time 😂

If she hears you getting close to her hiding spot she immediately moves

So it’s very rare you do win

and as a seeker she uses her hollows (sometimes zoro too, he does it begrudgingly though) to find you

she also goes through walls so yeah that helps, when she hears you she can get to you faster

If your a straw hat Kuma mighta sent you there for stealth training 😂😂

I feel if your highly intelligent you could outsmart her though, especially if you learn her way of thinking

with physical affection perona loves to cuddle, hug and give cheek kisses

NOT around zoro and mihawk though

she gets so embarrassed about it

pda does not amuse her so don’t try it

she doesn’t really like using her hollows on you but she just might

she loves to show you off despite that!

oddly enough

she constantly brags about your feats and accomplishments

she may as well be more proud than you!

Even if you haven’t done much she still prasies you

The ghost princess absolutely cherishes you!

anyway yeah she gives you a forehead kiss before you go to sleep

and she expects one back!

but wait til right before she falls asleep!

it’s more romantic that way 😍

(yes she wants it that specific way or she’s going to be pouty with you the next day)

if you don’t do it right she will ignore you

But she gives in first bc 1) she loves you too much 2) she gets bored 3) she likes your attention

she also does this thing where she holds onto your arm and floats

She secretly wants you to kabedon her

shell never tell you that..

(look it up if you don’t know what it is :P)

She reminds you of a cat when cuddling

she practically curls up into a ball on your lap

she gives you cheek kisses whenever you do her a favor or if she’s just feeling particularly happy

(for more dense m/n that’ll be if you did something smart or didn’t tick her off on accident today)

perona will also simp if you have abs/muscles

will avoid you for a bit if you catch her though

I mean she can go through walls so if your changing and she’s comes in..

OF COURSE SHE DOESN’T STAY FOR THE FULL THING SHE’S NOT A PERVERT IT’S JUST-

even if you don’t mind she doesn’t want you to catch her admiring you

she spies on you working out still, since that’s less suspicious

if you don’t have abs that’s all right

she romanticizes you anyways so no matter what you look like or what you do she absolutely adores you!

Your love life with perona is never dull!

she genuinely loves you ♡

These were a really good length! 💪 I’m getting back in my groove! 😼

I was originally not gonna do these but I’m glad I did they didn’t take very long and were fun to write! :) hope you enjoyed lovelies 💖

[kim-ruzek]

Girl Crush

Summary: This time, Sylvie does not laugh at the bluntness of Kim’s words, instead blushing a fierce shade of pink. She was only half looking at Kim when she said those words, but now Sylvie looks at the other woman more directly. She is greeted by Kim looking at her—although, maybe staring would be more accurate. It’s an intense look, a look her friend has never given her before, a look that says that maybe Kim doesn’t want to be just her friend tonight.

Or; at the end of 3x23, Sylvie doesn't go home with Roman-- but instead with Kim. And gets the fucking she deserves.

Warnings: Smut, smut, smut. This is just my excuse to give Sylvie the orgasm she deserves and the one she clearly did not get with Ratman. And so there's also Roman bashing bc Roman is trash.

Word Count: 4.5k

Read on AO3

Notes: For @gilbxrt-blythe bc Abby started™ something in my mind on Sunday, thus leading me to writing this all yesterday bc,,, our girls deserve so much better than Sean Roman and this fandom needs more wlw content. Let's save our darling girls!!

Someone’s hooking up tonight.

Chili’s words go around in Sylvie’s head all night. Largely, she ignores them—or rather, tries to—just focusing on the beer she’s sipping faster than usual and the joyous atmosphere in the bar but there’s those moments it creeps into her thoughts.

Her PIC is right about one thing, the thing she said about volcanoes. The firehouse has been so tense of late and she can tell that a weight has been lifted off them, and Sylvie thinks that’s quite like a volcano. But she—perhaps, stubbornly—refuses to admit Chili might be right about the hooking up part.

If anyone was to know Sylvie’s thoughts, know that she’s trying, more vehemently that she should, to deny that, they question why. To which Sylvie would just claim that it’s because she hates gossiping about her co-workers, people who are her friends are family, and that she doesn’t like speculating on their sex lives.

Sylvie even tried to insist this to herself, not that it works. How can it when she can feel her toes curl slightly at the thought of just... Throwing everything to the wind and just enjoying some pure, unadulterated primal ecstasy. That she finds herself subconsciously looking around the bar, as if she’s trying to find a suitable candidate.

She has always felt the weight of her friends’ turmoil so heavily. Empathetic to the core, her father said, when he grinned at her becoming a paramedic, telling her it’s what she was born to do. She likes it, she does. She likes caring about those important to her, to care about anyone who’s a decent human—and even those who aren’t—but it gets tiring, feeling the weight of their unhappiness on her shoulders.

It’s not even like she was directly wrapped up in the drama going around in the house, but it was so intense—a volcano getting ready to burst. And something tells her that she won’t be able to shake it off with just getting drunk amongst her friends.

“Hey, Brett,” Sylvie looks to her left, seeing Sean Roman slip into the seat beside her. The paramedic smiles at him, ever polite, turning so she’s more face on to him. He was close to her before she shifted, and she thought that would be annoying, if he wanted to converse.

Only, Sylvie quickly gets that he doesn’t have talking on mind.

The patrol officer is quick to close the space between them again, shifting himself and resting a hand on the back edge of her seat. She could get away if she wanted, but it gives off a certain trapped vibe, a vibe that shows exactly the kind of intentions Roman has.

There’s a twist of uncomfortableness in her stomach. Roman is sort of attractive, she guesses, although she doesn’t know if she’d fully trust her taste in men yet; there being too many wrongly stacked choices compared to the right. But even if he was the hottest specimen she had ever seen, there’s something off putting about his approach, leaving her with the impression he doesn’t want her to move away from him.

But there’s that volcano inside her, wanting to explode, and the alcohol is already coursing through her veins, so despite the sober parts of her brain metaphorically screwing up its nose at the officer, Sylvie doesn’t attempt to move again, instead leaning on her arm, interested in whatever he has to say.

“I’ve got a few more interesting stories like that, if you want to hear more?” Roman smiles hungrily at her, his eyes making her feel like a piece of meat. He had just finished telling her an amusing story from patrol and she gets the impression that’s his hook, and that now he’s trying to reel her in.

“The bar’s a bit loud, though. So we should go back to mine,” There it is, the beginning of the reel. He’s looking hopeful at her, and there’s an attempt to look appealing, sexy. It doesn’t work, but Sylvie finds herself shrugging, thinking that she could do a lot worse that Sean Roman.

“Hey, Sylvie. Roman.” Before she can agree, Kim appears, seemingly out of nowhere.

The brunette is on the other side of her, her arm lightly touching her as she greets them. In a way, Kim is affectively penning Sylvie in like her partner did, but it doesn’t make her stomach twist in that same uncomfortable way. There’s some meaning to that, she knows, but she doesn’t bother to reflect on what.

“Hey, Burgess.” Roman seems irked. He’s looking at her rather rudely, and Sylvie doesn’t like that. She cares about her friends and Kim is one of her first Chicago friends who doesn’t work with her. So she grins at her a little wider then she already would, wrapping her arms around the other officer.

“Hey, Kim!” If Roman picks up on the pointedness in Sylvie’s tone, he doesn’t let on.

“Hi,” Kim smiles at her again, repeating a greeting before continuing and Sylvie must be a little more tipsy than she thought because her mind is immediately drawn to how pretty Kim looks when she smiles. “Chili had to leave early and asked me if I could drive you home instead. She said sorry, but there was a cute guy who she needed to know a bit better,”

Sylvie knows instantly that Kim is lying. Chili asked no such thing, considering she wanted to get absolutely wasted tonight and had no intention of driving herself home, let alone Sylvie. This lie is an anchor, a get out of jail card, a bailout. For who, she doesn’t know—doesn’t think that she’s too drunk to need it, but she takes it anyway.

“Oh, she promised she wouldn’t!” Sylvie goes along with the lie Kim has spun. “I’m sorry for inconveniencing you,”

“Eh. It’s no problem.” Kim shrugs her off with a wave of a hand.

“I was actually about to leave myself. I can take Brett, you can just relax. That way I can continue telling her some patrol stories,” Roman inserts himself back in the conversation but Kim has no patience for him.

“We’re partners, I can tell her the stories. C’mon, Sylvie, let’s go.” Kim gently encourages Sylvie up. There’s a disappointment at not being able to expend all this tension away, but girl code is more important, and girl code is telling her to go with Kim.

“We have to walk around the block—I don’t actually have my car, so we’ll have to call a taxi.” Kim tells her when they leave Molly’s, arms linked. Neither of them are anything more than tipsy, but Sylvie finds herself giggling at her words.

“Then why did you drag me out? Was a guy bothering you?” She asks.

“Oh, trust me, I did that for you. You’d regret that so much tomorrow. The guy’s my partner and all, but he... I was on patrol with his ex. Going there—that wouldn’t give you any sort of satisfaction.” Kim explains, and Sylvie widens her eyes, giggling again.

“Really?” The irony of Sylvie spending the evening denying that she cares about gossip saying this, leaning in with intrigue, is not lost on her.

“Jenn didn’t say anything outright but... I asked why she got engaged so quickly and she expressed that he—her fiancé—is very talented with his tongue, if you get what I mean. I inferred the rest. A man who won’t eat out his girl is not a man worth your time.” Kim says very manner of fact, and Sylvie laughs at it, the brunette joining in shortly after.

“It’s the truth!” Kim insists through her laughter. They’ve walked around the corner, now, Kim quickly dialling for a taxi through her laughs.

“My ex fiancé never did.” Sylvie confesses when their laughter died down. Kim lifts an eyebrow.

“Never?”

“Never. He said it was disgusting. Didn’t stop him wanting me to suck him, though.” Sylvie can’t help the bitter edge to her words, thinking about Harrison and thinking about how she could waste her time on him. Kim, evidently, thinks the same.

“Life is too short for those kinds of men.” Kim says. Her words are assured, confident, just a statement and Sylvie just hums in response, thinking that Kim probably never wasted years like she did.

“Hey, Sylvie. I don’t mean that like... You deserve so much better.” Kim picks up on her sudden drop of mood. “I don’t know why we lower ourselves for arses like that, but you deserve so much better. Better than people like Harrison and Roman.”

“So do you—if your exes never..?” Sylvie quickly adds on and Kim lets out a snort.

“Oh yeah. I’ve dated my fair share of arseholes.” She nods. “I don’t know why they’re like this. You’re so pretty, I don’t know how anyone could want to fuck you and not completely worship you.”

This time, Sylvie does not laugh at the bluntness of Kim’s words, instead blushing a fierce shade of pink. She was only half looking at Kim when she said those words, but now Sylvie looks at the other woman more directly. She is greeted by Kim looking at her—although, maybe staring would be more accurate. It’s an intense look, a look her friend has never given her before, a look that says that maybe Kim doesn’t want to be just her friend tonight.

It deepens Sylvie’s blush.

The air between them immediately shifts, and it feels almost so natural, Sylvie finds herself questioning whether the air always felt this thick and charged. The air is heavy, and there’s this certain kind of electricity between them; an electric energy of sorts that reminds her of when she was eighteen and her friends and her caught a ride into the nearest big town and snuck into the club—and of Sylvie waiting outside for her friends after and sharing her first—and only—kiss with a girl.

“That’s cos we’re women, though? We know what we want.” Sylvie tries to push all those thoughts aside.

Tries to ignore what she feels building in the air—because surely, it’s just in her mind? Just because she was thinking about throwing caution to the wind and having a night of passionate, explosive sex—and tries to not focus on how pretty Kim looks, how she looks like she’s the best and worst decision she could ever make wrapped up in one.

On how Kim is looking at her with such intense eyes, almost hungry eyes, eyes that says she wants to be one of those men.

“That’s not just why. I wouldn’t just eat you out until you come screaming because I’m a woman, I’d do it because I want to make you come undone at my doing—like you deserve.” Kim’s words sends pulsating throbs through her body, and she can feel herself getting turned on, her body feeling like Kim has just found the secret code to her with just her words. Sylvie stares at Kim, with shock.

“You... I... What?” Sylvie splutters, unsure of what exactly Kim is saying.

“I’m just saying. You’re hot, Brett. I can see why Roman tried.” There’s a pause. “I’m not trying to ruin our friendship. Tell me if I’m wrong, that I’m not picking up on some things and I’ll shut up and just get you home. But if I’m right, I’ll fuck you right.”

“I...” Sylvie is facing Kim dead on, now, the space between them feeling like too much, electric and heavy. It’s dark, the only light being the street lamp. But it catches the side of Kim’s face, lighting it up in such a pretty way and it stirs something deep and primal inside her.

The dark, positively hungry eyes Kim is looking at her with doesn’t help, either. It’s not like earlier, with Roman, it doesn’t make her feel like a piece of meat. It makes her feel like she’s the world’s most precious delicacy and that Kim would give her left arm just to get a taste.

“You’re right.” The words are barely out of her mouth when Kim is closing the space between them. One of her arms slips around the blonde’s waist, pulling her flush to her, the other gently resting on the bend of Sylvie’s neck as she kisses her.

Kim’s lips are soft, her touch gentle. The kiss starts off slow, although Sylvie wouldn’t have thought it with the way her body immediately responds, aching and her heart beating. But then Kim deepens the kiss, encouraging her mouth to open wider, slipping in her tongue. Sylvie responds eagerly, her arms wrapping around Kim, practically grabbing hold of her so she can return the kiss more fiercely.

If this was a preview into the abilities of Kim’s tongue, Sylvie doesn’t think that she’ll have to work her long before—to use Kim’s words—Sylvie’s coming undone at her doing.

When the taxi arrives, honking it’s horn on the two, busy kissing each other like they’re the only people in the world, the alcohol running through their veins and their and respective tiring days edging them on, making them so filled with want for this, they pull apart, out of breath, chest heaving.

They share smiles, little light-hearted giggles as they pull apart, climbing into the taxi. Kim opens the door, grabbing at Sylvie’s hand as she does so before moving swiftly out the way so she can climb in first.

They don’t make out in the taxi. They’re not even jammed up too close together, their bodies just turned towards each other. They are close enough for them to still have their hands interlocked, although it’s more like their arms at places and for their feet to lightly tap at the other’s, playing a footsy kind of game but they’re friends, they shared a taxi before, they’ve even had this ease of physical contact before.

Sylvie would almost wouldn’t be able to tell that the line between friends and lovers had been blurred for tonight, if it wasn’t for the electric energy between them, from how Sylvie’s just waiting until they can get back to hers, and how whenever Kim moves her fingers up and down her arm, gently running against her skin, it feels like little shocks.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been to yours,” Kim says as Sylvie leads her up the stairs. They’re deviating between holding hands and not, joking around as they make their way. Sometimes Kim’s spinning ahead of her, their hands dropping from their grip, and sometimes Sylvie is.

“We have only known each other a year and we have busy jobs.” Sylvie points out. Kim sticks out her tongue playfully and Sylvie has to stop herself from capturing it, and kissing Kim again. “This is me.”

Sylvie goes in first, opening her front door and placing her keys in her pot. Kim follows, and Sylvie watches as the brunette kicks off her shoes immediately, shrugging off her coat. For someone who’s never been here before, Kim fills the air with a confidence and it only fuels Sylvie’s need, her own confidence as the volcano erupts.

With a swift kick, Sylvie shuts her door and then her hands are on Kim, pulling her close. She grabs her hand, stopping her from moving further away from her, pulling her to her and capturing her lips in a kiss.

“Hm,” Kim moans against her, kissing her with a casual, yet urgent force. The melodic hum is tinted in amusement, and she pulls away briefly, to Sylvie’s disappointment. “So, we’re going straight to this? Aren’t even going to ask if I want a beer?”

Her words are said in an amused tone, but Sylvie still finds herself blushing, cursing herself slightly.

“Oh. Right. Sorry. Do you—” She’s interrupted by Kim kissing her.

“You’re so easy to tease. Don’t worry, I don’t want anything to drink. Eat, maybe.” Sylvie goes to panic again but then she sees the glint sparkling away in her eye and she blushes, getting the play on words.

“Hm, well there’s only one thing on the menu if you’re,” she pauses, “Hungry,”

Sylvie could swear that Kim licks her lips but then the brunette is kissing her again and all thoughts go out of her head, the only thing on her mind being the taste of Kim and getting her to her bedroom as soon as she can.

Neither of them are determined to disconnect from one another for long, not even in the interest in getting to her bed unscathed from injuries. Kim hits into the sofa and Sylvie nearly trips over something she left on the floor, but the two stay touching, kissing each other hungrily and needily.

Sylvie would love to say that she savoured the moment Kim took off her top, but any clothes removed is done hastily, urgently, the clothes feeling too much, too intrusive. All Sylvie can do is give Kim a quick, appreciative look over after she tosses off her top.

Although, she thinks, that could do more with that Kim then helps her get her top off, and rewards her with her lips on her neck immediately after.

“There,” Sylvie manages to gasp out, pointing at which door is her bedroom’s, as Kim pushes her up against her wall, attacking her neck, nipping and sucking at the flesh. She’s going to have a mark there tomorrow, but tonight, tonight she doesn’t care, just tilting her head aside for her to have more access, her hands just grabbing at Kim as she does so.

Despite the urgency to get this far into her apartment, Kim has apparently decided they don’t need to finish the stretch right now, focusing on kissing along her collarbone, back up along her neck and jawline, stealing kisses from her lips before heading back down. She doesn’t go too far down with her kisses, but it’s enough to send Sylvie’s mind haywire, especially when she brushes along with her teeth.

All Sylvie can do is grab at Kim’s hair, the other hand resting on her waist, running up and down her back with her nails and moan at the kisses, grasping at her. One of Sylvie’s legs loops around Kim’s in a kind of way, pulling her lower body closer to her own, in the perfect place for Sylvie to grind against, needing to alleviate some tension.

It’s only when Kim’s hand snakes away from it’s current position and runs along the waistband of her jeans, deftly undoing her button and slipping inside does Sylvie gasp, pushing at Kim slightly. Kim’s hand is still cold from the cool Chicago night air, and Sylvie can feel the cold as Kim runs her hand against the cotton of her panties, lightly brushing over her throbbing clit.

“Bedroom. Kim, bedroom,” Sylvie gasps.

“Hm. Impatient, are we?” Kim grins at her, and Sylvie can’t help comparing it to a wolf looking at it’s prey. The brunette is so sweet and kind, Sylvie never would’ve guessed that she was like this—so confident and devious—in the bedroom. Or, rather, the hallway. But Sylvie wouldn’t have it any other way.

Kim steps away from Sylvie then, and she immediately misses the warmth of her body, and her hand's presence from where it was so close to where she wants—no, needs—her. She’s going into Sylvie’s bedroom, beckoning the blonde to follow.

Sylvie is starting to rather feel like putty in Kim’s hands, and she’s never been a passive participant in her sex life—well, except when she lets men (Harrison) rule how she should be—and she’s not about to start.

She follows Kim on through, and she already has an advantage knowing the layout of her bedroom. Sylvie’s hands are on Kim again, and she’s leading, practically pushing, Kim to her bed, the brunette having no choice but to lie down on it, Sylvie immediately straddling her.

“Not a very good cop, are you?” Sylvie teases her, and when Kim goes to protest, she grinds down slightly, knowing exactly where it’ll cause friction. It has the desired effect, Kim moaning, her eyes fluttering shut slightly. Her hands are resting of Sylvie’s hips, and they go up then, stroking at the soft skin of her stomach.

“Bra, off. Now,” Kim says, running a hand along the edge of the bra. Sylvie grins wickedly at her, wondering why Kim ever thought she still had the upper hand, to doll out an order.

“Yes. That’s a good idea.” Sylvie shifts down Kim slightly, resting more weight on her own kneeled legs, allowing for Kim to sit up. The brunette clearly thinks it’s so she can help Sylvie with the bra, but Sylvie catches her hands, stopping her, and instead undoes Kim’s bra.

Sylvie’s never been intimate with a woman like this. There’s been those dreams—day dreams and actual dreams—that she spent a while trying to ignore, and thinking she’ll never act upon. But she’s never, physically, been with one and whereas her confidence has gotten her this far, she falters as Kim takes off her bra.

There’s that hesitation, that hesitation that she wants Kim—needs Kim—that this is exactly how she wants to explode tonight, but there’s that knowledge that she’s inexperienced in this, hitting her as she’s confronted with Kim’s naked chest.

“Is this too much?” Kim picks up straight away that Sylvie is having a moment, her eyebrows furrowing, turning concerned. “We can stop or just make out. Whatever you want—consent still applies with two women, y’know, and I won’t mind.”

Sylvie looks at her, Kim’s voice so gentle and caring, her big, brown eyes only filled with concerned, and something inside her throbs and Sylvie’s hesitation wears off as she realises that there’s nothing to be intimidated by, and Kim won’t mind if she has to guide her a little.

“Nah, I’m just taking your beauty in.” Sylvie jokes, before adding more seriously, “This is exactly what I want, Kim.”

“Good.” Kim smiles. “Because I’m feeling that we should even things here.”

Sylvie should’ve know that Kim would take off her bra as soon as she could, the brunette raking her eyes greedily over her body. She grabs at Sylvie’s thighs, positioning her in a way that she can sit on her and they can kiss with ease.

Kim doesn’t spend long kissing her lips before she’s travelling again, her fingers gently tracing patterns on her back as she kisses down her neck, collarbone, going between kisses and nips. Sylvie tries to adjust herself so that she can kiss the dip of Kim’s shoulder as she does so, but Kim tries her hardest to stop any attempts, not wanting to be restricted in her own explorations.

When Kim’s mouth gets to her chest, she pauses. Sylvie has barely any time to wonder what will happen next when Kim’s hand is palming one breast, making her gasp in surprise. The brunette lifts her mouth from her body, instead taking advantage of her agape mouth, kissing her deep. And then she’s moving them, laying Sylvie down, shifting who’s winning this lustful game of cat and mouse they’re playing.

Kim doesn’t straddle her like Sylvie did earlier, just making them vertical, Kim between her legs. She’s squeezing her breast again, and then her mouth is around the other’s nipple, rolling her tongue around it, and Sylvie lets out a loud moan she’d almost be embarrassed about if it didn’t feel so good. Kim works her like this for god knows how long before switching.

And then Kim is once again pulling away and Sylvie pouts, to Kim’s amusement.

“Don’t worry, baby,” Kim coos at her. “I’m just taking off your jeans so I can fuck you with my mouth.”

Sylvie never knew hearing Kim swear could sound so hot.

“Your jeans too. I was you as naked as I am,” She doesn’t know how she still has brain power to compose thoughts, focused so much on the needy ache in her body.

Kim steps off the bed so that she can shimmy off her jeans. Her panties match the bra she was wearing and Sylvie couldn’t even describe how much that made her desire spike. She wonders if Kim was working today and if she changed before going to Molly’s—curious to know if Kim wore such lacy stuff to work.

Surely not? Sylvie sure as hell doesn’t, let alone wearing a matching set.

“Like what you see?” Kim flirts before climbing back onto the bed, immediately getting to work on helping Sylvie get off her own jeans. There’s a moment when they’re off that Sylvie gets momentarily self conscious of her near-naked body, but then Kim’s running a finger along her panties again, pressing down on her clit through the fabric.

The sound it elicits from her is a mix between a gasp, moan and whine.

“Kim,” Sylvie practically begs as she releases the pressure, resuming to gentle barely there strokes as she returns her mouth to her breasts, collarbone and neck. Kim seems to get the message because then she’s—with skill that makes Sylvie wonder just how many times Kim has done this—hooking her fingers around her panties and taking them off.

She doesn’t hesitate to resume her actions, now without the fabric in the way. Kim dips a finger inside her, her thumb brushing against her clit with differentiating levels of pressure and Sylvie can’t help but shut her eyes and moan at the sensation, Kim working her with her talented fingers.

“You’re so wet,” Kim whispers into her ear, nibbling against her jawline before adding another finger. She laughs hotly against her as Sylvie tightens, squeezing Kim’s fingers. She’s just about used to the feeling, and the motions, a pressure inside her building, but then Kim’s pulling them out and she’s whining.

And then Kim’s pulling away from her, and Sylvie just about opens her eyes, lifting up her head, in time to see down her body, looking devilishly. And then Kim’s licking her and it’s everything she’s wanted, needed, and her head is falling back down. Kim works her with her mouth, and all Sylvie can think is about how indeed, Kim is mightily skilled with her tongue.

The tension in Sylvie builds quickly, fast approaching her orgasm, Kim lapping at her and using her fingers to add that extra sensation, rubbing and pinching, alternating between making she’s in place and fondling her breasts and Sylvie’s gripping at her covers, gasping and whining as she writhes, overwhelmed at the sensations.

All thoughts have left her mind, and all Sylvie can focus on is the quick approaching climax, not caring about how lost in it she must be—not caring how loud she’s being, how unfiltered and uncontrolled she is, just focused on how good Kim is making her feel.

And then she reaches her climax, Kim is taking her over and she gets her wish—it’s everything Sylvie has needed, and she screams, full of ecstasy, her body overcome with sensation, toes curling as she comes around Kim’s tongue, the brunette continuing to lap at her, guiding her through her orgasm.

“That...” Sylvie pants as soon as she can. “That—exactly what I needed.”

It’s not perfect grammar, but she thinks Kim gets it, if how she smiles and moves so she’s cuddling against Sylvie, is any indication.

[kaleidotropepodcast]

the great inbox dump continues!

chetungwan said:

You followed me the same day I finished the podcast, how did you know

Just the Sidlesmith magic, @chetungwan! 

Anonymous said: 

so i just listened to the rent rant and i love this podcast and it is taking me over however i might’ve lost it when drew said the movie is bad, it’s one of the few musical movies i even care about.

Look I (Aja) bawled like a baby the first time I saw the movie, just like I do every time I see / hear the show. And fwiw, Drew would be the first person to tell you that no criticism of a piece of media should ever make you feel ashamed of loving it, because if it speaks to you, then that’s all that matters. <333 And Rent itself is all about that idea, too, so embrace it and go moo your heart out. :D

fancygeorgejones said: 

Sick Benjamin Britten reference I LOVE YOU

THANK YOU, @fancygeorgejones! one of us may have written our music school thesis on homoerotic themes in benjamin britten operas so we very much appreciate your appreciation.

Anonymous said:

late to the party ig but. love the podcast it’s so cute!! anyway just wanted to say that the song Valentine by Atlas gives me Big Harridrew Vibes and I can’t help but imagine drew singing it to harrison bc it’s like... exactly something his overly romantic gay ass would write

Harrison definitely has this song memorized, and definitely Drew would notice and try to memorize it and then rap it to him adorably for Valentine’s, and then they would have lots of half-hug half-cuddle sweater moments, what, it’s fine, we’re fine

Anonymous said: 

I really want to review your show but it has 69 reviews on itunes right now and I desperately do not want to be the one to break that so im at a crossroads because I also want to help it get noticed.....

We’d tell you that you’re in luck because now there are 122 ratings, so you can review away! But in fact reviews apparently don’t make much of a difference in shows getting noticed anyway, so the best thing you can do to spread the word is, well, spread the word! IE tell people that we exist! :)  <3333 (And we know so many of you guys do just that and we love you so much for it!!)

Anonymous said: 

Is your podcast on Spotify?

I’ve heard good things about it and really want to start it but can’t find it on Spotify :(

We are not on Spotify! we applied but were rejected, probably because we recorded everything in a garage on dial-up at the bottom of the ocean 😭

Anonymous said: 

Do you think Harrison would make a good zookeeper?

Harrison would be slightly less awful than Drew, but between them they would turn every single animal encounter into an Event, and no zoo needs that much drama 😂

Anonymous said: 

have you ever considered publishing a book surround drew and harrison's story? like the transcripts, or even a novel, cause i would 100% buy 7 copies of it

....well, we’re considering it now!

Anonymous said:

I'm preparing a fanfic about the Sidlesmith founders, and trying to use the story on the website as a base, but combining the dates from that and the date of the contract in the show, the contract is more than two years after Sidlesmith received their trust funds, while in the contract it seems like they're yet to get them. So, to be true to canon, which i know is not a requirement, but i want to be, would I have to work that into the story somehow or should i change the date of the contract?

Oh, no, a continuity error! We wrote the story on the website first, I believe, and the story itself is canonical, but we all know dates are fuzzy like that.  The website and the show are both consistent that the contract was signed before they got married and the fake relationship was to end once they got their trust funds a year later. That’s the important thing — the dates are *handwaves* whatever.

Remember, this is a town that’s a thriving sea port surrounded by mountains, that’s located south of the Ozarks (Arkansas) but north of the Mississippi River (Minnesota). Time and temporality are funny things, at a baseline. So feel free to have fun with that! :D

Anonymous said:

I'm writing an enemies to lovers, fake dating sidlesmith fic. is there anything more you can tell me about them? or even the construction of the college?

oh i hope there are two of you!!! 🙏

Harriet was smoking hot and desired by everyone, and Henrik had one hell of an impressive beard. Harriet was hot-headed, but also frustratingly pedantic, while Henrik was stodgy and something of a dullard until he stumbled across a subject about which he was passionate. 

They had identical taste in literature, how annoying, and always interpreted everything they read in exactly opposite ways. They each had very advanced ideas about things like sexuality, polyamory, and gender, but expressed them in their very different ways, which means they rarely realized how often they in fact agreed. They absolutely did not get rip-roaring drunk one night after fighting furiously over Melmoth the Wanderer, then raid each other’s wardrobes in order to try on one another’s clothes, and absolutely did not then have the best sex of their lives while still Harriet was still clad in Henrik’s breeches and suspenders and Henrik was still wearing her hoop skirts and corsets, after which they absolutely never ever talked about it again, because there was nothing to talk about. 

Or maybe they were both ace and aromantic, and the fact they started a magic school of romance is a giant irony. Who knows!

As for the school, during the spiritualist craze of the late 19th century, a number of students held seances to try to summon the spirits of Sidlesmith, until it’s rumored that Harriet got tired of being summoned and declared she’d curse the next person who called her back from the Beyond because she and Henrik were enjoying very cozy afterlives, thank you very much. Shortly thereafter, a student who was known to be highly interested in witchcraft was seen entering a small copse of trees in the center of campus, right at midnight. The student vanished, and the students who saw her enter the trees were never able to say precisely where she had gone. And they say that today, if you examine the original blueprints of the college, there’s a small area in the middle of campus that’s completely untraceable today — as if the Sidlesmith curse had wiped out both the student and the grove in which she walked. 

[alo-piss-trancy]

My brain started hitting me with ideas out of nowhere earlier today and:

I think I'm starting to really like the concept of Te/ruTeruxGun/dham akfghlkl (and also Ter/uTeruxHaji/me but to a lesser extent)

Not as OTPs of course, my main ships are way too strong to be dissuaded but they are kinda cute/interesting concepts c':

BIG SPOILERS FOR BOTH MAIN AND ISLAND GAME BELOW!!!

Teru's FTEs in island mode with H/ajime were cute tbh (I haven't done the actual date stuff with him, I just mean regular FTE route). You know, minus the drugging at the end. He would obviously have to develop to the point of Not Doing That and better himself as a person before Haji would ever want to legit date him lmao

I don't have a lot of concepts for them yet I just like that Haji is deadpan enough that he wouldn't put up with any of Teru's bullshit but also he can be flustered easily at times so Teru could still pull some teasing over on him every so often lol (or a lot. Make Haji go bright red and choke on his drink. I love the idea of Teru flustering him to death and being a smug lil shit about it). And also Teru picking the one who's supposed to be The Bland Everyman is fun because either A. 'Makeover Time' that Haji immediately rejects or B. Teru gets to look More Fabulous by comparison. He is very pleased with this.

Come on Haji the man made you a Pot Roast. A POT ROAST. A GOOD SOUTHERN ONE WITH ALL THE FIXIN'S. MARRY HIM.

Also they're both such sassy bi/s lets be real. Teru is the one who back hand compliments you and Haji will just call you a bitch to your face. They'd be the couple that trash talks everyone as soon as they get in the car/back home. Which isn't a great trait ofc but you know, no one's perfect.

~~~

Okay and for Gu/ndham I have more ideas just because I always do I love him so much

But I really like the irony of Te/ruteru accidentally Catching Feelings for the one guy on that damn island he didn't flirt with lmao. I mean come on, Gu/ndham is pasty af and he's weird and intimidating and tbh I don't think they exchanged like, two words in the game. They stayed away from each other except idk how it happened exactly but oh boy Teru's in deep and he has no idea how to deal with it bc these aren't his normal sexy joking flirty feelings these are Real Fuzzy Feelings (tm) EW WHAT THE FUCK GET THEM AWAY H E L P?!?

Bonus: As usual, G is painstakingly oblivious and that's an extra special hell for Teru bc none of his suave pickup lines or not-so-subtle touches or Love Potions (not drugs this time, probs just fruit punch made special with his fav fruits) are working and he wants to scream

He probably DOES end up screaming and Gu/ndham's even more baffled. H/ajime probably has to step in as wingman for both of them.

G/undham does eventually come around and understand, and also understand 'oh shit I actually do like this short very loud chef'

Teru would probably acknowledge that Gu/ndham is technically the second most 'effeminate' (for lack of a better word, idk fashion) dresser out of the boys on the island and it doesn't look half-bad. He does have good taste in jewelry and his hair proves he puts effort into styling it. The scarf is also nice. If he'd just drop the 3000 layers and Bandaged Dark Wizard Thing he could look very fabulous (and very hot). Gu/ndham might, if he is feeling generous, allow one (1) emo pretty boi makeover. For a single day.

Domestic fluff:

*Teru works rlly hard to learn and make excellent vegetarian dishes even if the lack of giant meat chunks is murder to his southern soul. He also goes out of his way to prepare exciting treats and meals for the D/evas.

*He even lets Gu/ndham help in the kitchen sometimes. Except he always puts too much salt in 'I SAID A PINCH GODAMMIT NOT THE WHOLE DIDDLY DAMN SALT BAG' - 'BUT YOUR DISH REQUIRES THESE RITUAL SALT LINES TO KEEP DEMONS FROM SPOILING IT!"

*There are many arguments about whether or not the hamsters are allowed in the kitchen. Ranging from silly 2 minute banter to full blown life-or-death I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL screaming/crying matches. The hamsters take these opportunities to smuggle food out of the kitchen and leave their master and his new mate to bicker

*they try to avoid discussing meat/dairy farming for the sake of their relationship. However, Teru does get a tiny bit more sentiment for farm animals after seeing G interact with them on the ranch.

* Eventually Teru becomes fluent in G/undham-speak, and likewise, Gun/dham learns Teru's most 'A/vril Lavigne!!!!' Southern. After spending enough time together alone, they can end up speaking in a hideous mixture and everyone around them is even more lost and frustrated than they thought possible. Mo/nomi can't translate anymore. Even Mo/nukuma has a breakdown.

[breachy-breeches-creation]

An over-due SWTOR OC post....

Servius

a.k.a Lord Kallig, later unknown as Darth Imperius

Original birth name unknown

In one of his earliest memory, he remembered his parents talked about an ancestor of who fled and settle down in the Enchani space after the Great Hyperspace War. From where and why reasons are long forgotten until later when Servius discovered his ancestor Aloysius Kallig’s tomb chamber during his task to retrieve one of Tulak Hord’s holocrons in the Dark Temple.

As for his former position as a slave. He was actually not born as one, rather he was kidnapped by slavers at a very young age. Echani are known for their combat prowess and grace; there are individuals who have particular taste so to speak. The Galaxy’s a free market; when there’s demand, there will be supply. Let’s just put it that way.

Not exactly thrilled when he finds out who his ancestor is, however. He is the epitome of “lazy genius”.

Servius would rather be doing unimportant mundane things than facing (most) responsibilities. He did what he did simply to get the task at hand done and/or just fed up getting pushed around all the time. The irony of his brilliance and laziness is that in order to avoid further “complications” he’s good at coming up long term solutions. (He does like solving puzzles and strategy games if he feels like it that is.)

Most likely has many underlings (eventually) running errands for him, often in the “I have more important things to attend to” excuse. For example getting an artifact. There are things only he can do (such as pacifying ghost), he’ll do what he must, but otherwise lol

He might seem a very cold (and maybe a little heartless) individual but he’s actually not malicious nor arrogant as he might have appeared to be. More often then not its “it is just how it is”. The problem is not everyone is the same level of intelligence as him, so there’s a lot of “it’s that obvious! What are you, blind? (No offense to the Mirakulas out there lolz). To some people who don’t know him very well can find his attitude a bit insufferable.

The majority of the time he just outwits people mostly by sabotage or throws his opponent off into an intellectual logic loop. If he fights, it usually ends really ASAP, unless he calculates it’s more necessary more advantageous to drag out the fight. Plus it's more amusing to embarrass people without lifting a finger.

He’s also the kind of the person who reckless enough to jump off a cliff (after a quick estimated calculation) and use the Force to help him land bc he can’t be bothered to spend the 20~30 mins to get down there. Why SWTOR game mechanics doesn't have an equivalent of feather fall or any fall damage prevention. Why don’t we have flying mounts at higher lvls.Answer me EA/Bioware!

He does enjoy from time to time playing the act of obfuscating insanity or even stupidity for the fun of it, but mostly just so people would stop go bothering him.

Poor guy just wants to be left alone tbh. lol

I don’t know whether it is just him or is it the because the white eyes, it often makes the expression and the tone of the line delivered especially hilariously deadpanned and sarcastic lmao