#tammie x ryan 004

[rviner]

Tammie looks to him in soft scrutiny, her brows furrowing as she watches him make light of everything. A trademark that he's always been famous for and those closest all know that it's his own way of protection. But Ryan's laughter is contagious enough for her own expression to break from a wide smile. Scoffing, Tammie's eyes roll with the grin still in place over her lips. "You should tell him." she urges playfully, brows lifting as she finally laughs. "Maybe you and JJ will be the best a'buddies now." although it's unlikely, it's a momentary thought that brings her a sense of peace. What if everything is different? What if it isn't.

The mention of Beau has Tammie making a quick snort, shoving Ryan's arm again. "Oh God, leave him alone, he ain't botherin' nobody." she mumbles in a soft laugh. At least the Sullivan has given her a wide berth as of late, but Tammie has never wanted to exist ruthlessly to others, and she isn't immune to feeling guilt. She defends herself with a raise of her hand, proud in the fact she was eager and quick to protect her family. "Well, I ain't sorry. I'll never be sorry and you and Jacob and everyone else gotta accept that." she states clearly, sitting slightly straighter.

When the laughter goes, it only leaves room for Tammie to face the reality of their conversation. This is another form of a goodbye, and she can't help the urge that wants to overtake. To say no more goodbyes, let's just try. But, she can't. And she doubts Ryan will put up much of a fight. So, Tammie nods softly. "Okay." she accepts the inevitable, deciding that it's better now than later. Easier to control than to wait for it to happen all by itself. "Well," she clears her throat, glancing to Ryan and a part of her hopes he will say something else. Just anything so it isn't a goodbye. "If y'all need anythin', you know where we are."

★・・・・・・★

Ryan snickers, pulling his foot away after Tammie thuds her boot against it. "It's easy to laugh when everythin's funny." he shrugs in more laughter, knowing he's pushing his luck but also continuing. The fact Tammie can see straight through him like the rest of his family doesn't stop the charade either, for long. Because he supposes, she is family. That was a lot of years together, practically becoming one if it wasn't for the barricades lifted into place that they're still both desperately trying to keep there. He nods about JJ, letting out a sigh because differences aside, Jackson Jones managed to save all of their asses. "Yeah, your dad's gotta be proud. Raised all y'all up right but JJ stepped the fuck up, can't deny that." and he'd probably say it to the other's face if there weren't lingering resentments.

Laughing about Jacob, Ryan shrugs his hands in a quick there you go motion. Center Hill wasn't exactly a city even if their lives hugged around Atlanta, but there's a certain kind of city boy that's painfully obvious and Ryan will never be it. "Bet Beau's happy to get a friend." he comments, a cheeky tone as he grins but glances away from Tammie. As soon as her hit connects with his arm, he's cackling and his head is shaking in a firm no. "Don't even start that, Tammie. You was tryna blow his damn head off!" he's curious what would have actually happened if JJ didn't intervene, but for Jacob's sake is happy somebody kept their head. Everybody else's seemed long gone.

I don't know. It pulls the laughter to a stop, and Ryan can only nod. Because Tammie is someone who's sure of everything, even the things she's unsure about. There's never much doubt in her stubbornness, and it kills Ryan to think that he's to blame for it suddenly appearing. That out of all the things for Tammie to be unsure about, the rare times she is. It's them. It's him. "Yeah." he agrees for the sake of it because of his own doubt. Fighting seems worth it and more, but not if Tammie's made up her mind. "Alright, we can forget it. I'll probably er..." he waves a hand in the direction he came from. "Got a few things goin' on so probably won't catch you for a while."

[rviner]

"Oh wow, that was some quick thinkin'." Tammie remarks sardonically in a laugh of her own at Ryan's rather feeble attempt of a save and like always, not many things can be left alone. Her boot connects with his in a swift knock. "Wish I found everythin' as God damn funny as you do. Just laughin' at nothing." she adds as an afterthought even if the Cross' constant joker-act was enough to make her crazy at times. But this moment seem more bitter than sweet and Tammie can't place exactly why. Sitting side by side like this, the distant noise of the work on the farm could be a snapshot of their past. It can easily resemble the long talks that drew on for hours until dusk draped the sky. But now there's a distance that doesn't even have a word. She chuckles, rolling her eyes before she looks at him. "None of us got anyone to thank 'cept JJ. He made all that look easy." she nods towards nothing, gesturing to the nightmare of Kaslo that's thankfully no longer a reality.

Tammie snorts about Jacob, nodding along to Ryan's observance. "Yeah he's from Chicago. Levi and Beau was with him back in the day. They all know each other, it's like some ol' frat house reunion with a bunch of boys that peaked in college now. Stinks like one too." immediately, her brows pull into a furrow at the mention of the gun and Tammie doesn't hesitate to whack full force into Ryan's arm. "The Hell you think I was raised around? I can shoot. I missed the shot on purpose, I didn't wanna kill him." she mentions in a pointed tone of pride, considering it was JJ's grab of the gun that made the bullet go through Jacob's shoulder.

The laughter doesn't remain, as Tammie knows as well as Ryan does that they're both delaying the inevitable. Isn't that what they always were, anyways? Years of sticking it out when they knew, deep down, how it was always going to end. It was naive hope keeping them going then but these days, hope doesn't seem in as much abundance. She's seen this story before, she knows the ending. When he asks her what she wants, Tammie doesn't know what to answer with. She wants things to make sense, for starters. Her eyes draw away from him slowly and she clears her throat. "I don't know." a shrug and a sigh follow and then there's more silence, cogs turning away. "It's easier, right? Just to forget it, with everythin' else going on. Kinda pointless to set ourselves up for failure again."

★・・・・・・★

His mouth falls open to respond but all that exhales is a laugh as Ryan shakes his head, like he's caught red handed in his own amusement. "Nothin'! I was just...it's nothin'. Ain't laughin' at you." he backtracks in a mumble, rubbing the back of his neck as he shrugs. It's their blessing and curse to know each other enough to read one another. So similar that their horns lock more times than they can count, but so similar that they simply just know. And it's evident that his presence at the damn stables isn't because he wants to muck out and heave horse shit into a wheelbarrow. He knows it was evident that, all along, he had never taken shifts there just for a helping hand. Tammie knows it too, but neither of them say it. "Nah was just, tryna stop you getting your ass killed. You know how stressed I was?" Ryan laughs, placing a small trail for Tammie to follow. The things said could just be things said, they didn't have to linger.

"Seems like a city asshole to me." Ryan comments about the new wolf, not sure how well he will blend with the Jones' but then again there's good old Sullivan city wolves that have been with them for years. "But now I'm really seein' why JJ didn't want me to get you that gun." he adds, remembering the memory while shooting Tammie a glance as he snickers. The small pause between them isn't silent, not really. He can hear the thoughts as they pace through Tammie's brain, certain he can hear them in her damn voice too. The cautiousness that contradicts everything that she is but maybe Ryan got too used to her stubbornness, expected it to always be there. Expected some kind of fight for them, even when he drew those walls up. In the end, she just did the same. Does it matter? Ryan's head tilts in a shrugging nod, as if the question is a sting to his ego. It matters to him. "Guess not." he sighs and follows the trail that Tammie then sets out for him. A deflection from the path they both want to follow. But he also hears her, loud and clear. "I meant what I said, before it all went to shit." Ryan doubts it changes much. "What you want, Tammie? 'cause I don't think I can just sit back like none of it was said."

[rviner]

As she hears Ryan's chuckle before anything has been said, Tammie's gaze shifts to him for a moment. She fights a grin from appearing over her face and scoffs, waving a hand to gesture at him. "What you laughin' at?" Tammie accuses, eyes narrowing while she fights her own chuckles. She can hazard a guess that it's at her, causing her curiousness to pique. But, it also goes hand in hand with who they are. They know each other too well, and even years apart hasn't changed much except cause a feeling of emptiness that Tammie hasn't been able to shake since. Then she catches herself almost mourning them again and snaps herself to, tells herself to stop being stupid. But, hearing his reply makes her nod. "Yeah, you were kinda unscathed." Tammie comments and it was annoying at the time but her gratefulness that he's okay is evident. She supposes, if she had to really admit it, she was also thankful that he cared so much about her safety.

She snickers about Jacob, giving an innocent and careless enough shrug because half of his injuries were there long before she shot a bullet through his shoulder. "Well, he'll live so it coulda been worse. He's damn annoyin', but our dad said we gotta keep him so that's that." like a goldfish won at a fairground, Jacob is now an odd part of the Jones pack that not many of them are excited over and yet it will probably live until it's a thousand years old. "I ain't started nothin', shut up." their laughter is easy again, annoyingly so but now Tammie can't force her features into a blank expression. There's a hint of life behind her eyes for the first time in weeks.

Tammie watches as Ryan shoots to the space beside her, chuckling again to herself before forcing a scoff at the comment. It's obvious where the conversation will go next and Tammie doesn't realize that she's bracing for impact. A Jones isn't scared of much, barreling head first into anything. Pushing through anything in their way. And yet Tammie finds herself cautious, having already seen the ending before. She's not sure if she could ever go through it again. "Does it matter?" she answers his question with one of her own, shrugging at him. "I can't even remember much of what I said anyways." Tammie then lies, in a way she hopes isn't obvious as she glances to Ryan. "Think we all got enough on our plates, right?"

★・・・・・・★

Ryan notes the distraction that he's disturbed and he wonders if this will be a short visit. One that doesn't exactly prove much other than his own beliefs that everything between them is better off in the past. But, he knows he divulged his sentiments to Tammie and in that short moment, she didn't deflect them. She didn't deny them. Almost became now, and yet it returns to being a fleeting moment that he's unsure to revisit. Regardless, Ryan holds onto it, trying to ignore the obvious defense she later on put up. It was stupid, really. Enough to make Ryan chuckle at nothing else other than how it was still a mirror image of what they used to be. A step forward, two back, a leap forward. A back and forth that didn't even tire them out. "Yeah." he sighs the answer, nodding subtly because he didn't have time to dwell on Kaslo or sit with his wounds or even wait for them to heal.

Ryan's hand lifts, ruffling through his hair while another laugh escapes about Jacob and Tammie's expected denial of ever being in the wrong. "I mean, he was put through it. Can't really blame 'im. Think he got it worse than all'a us." he snickers about the wolf, who at the time, was an annoying addition they had to worry about getting to Hollow Cove. All of it had been a disaster. Catching the roll of Tammie's eyes, Ryan's laughter grows. A childish sound where he finds amusement, yet again where it shouldn't be. "I was just asking! Don't start." he huffs, watching the box of food move into the space beside her. The little nod of her head is an invitation he takes quickly, flopping into the place beside her on the fence and he's still chuckling. "Really? 'cause I remember plenty'a times you were difficult without no wolfsbane." he teases for a moment, taking a breath as he glances towards the barn and then back to her. He's never coy or shy but there's a hesitancy that lingers over Ryan, a should he leave it alone question that whirls away in the back of his mind. Instead of surrendering to it, Ryan charges on instead. As he always does. "But sure, it was the wolfsbane. I'll humor ya." he picks at the lunch box, throwing a bite into his mouth as he smirks at her. "So all that other shit you said was a bunch'a bullshit?"

[rviner]

Kaslo sits firmly behind them but with the lingering effects of a bad dream. Tammie finds herself daily revisiting it, her mind churning through a mountain of what ifs. What if they didn't get out, what if JJ didn't find Nora. She's always been thankful for her family but there had been an air of arrogance that Tammie embodied since the day they lost the ranch. She thought the worst was over but now it's obvious that the worst can happen at any moment. Her mind drifts back and forth between then and now and there's another what if that constantly finds a way into her mind. Ryan Cross has been a what if for the past three years, and Tammie wonders if that's all he'll remain. Although, she knows her comments while they were trapped in that room certainly helps keep him as one. She's barely seen him, let alone talked with him.

She tunes out the thoughts of him, much easier than she used to when the wound was fresher and she was convinced it would never heal. Instead, Tammie takes a moment to recollect her thoughts and is distracted by the distant caw of a damn crow that she's seen more than once now since returning. An omen of death that flaps it's black wings before it flies off, only seeming to return whenever she's with Nora. And then it's Ryan's voice next that pulls her away. Her eyes bounce over his frame for a moment as she crosses her arms before replying curtly. "Uhuh. You?" but it's hard for animosity to stay in her tone for long. She lets out a laugh about the new Jones member, ironically who already knew Beau and Levi. But she looks away from Ryan, eyes searching the sky for any sign of that damn crow. "Jacob, yeah. Pretty much, been slow as all hell. He won't shut up about me shootin' him, though." and Tammie decided quickly it was his problem, not hers. She only glances back to Ryan at his comment, a flop of her head and a clear roll of her eyes. "I'm jus' tryna eat my damn food, Ry. Can you stop tryna beat your record on how fast you get on my last nerve?" she punches her lunch box lightly so it rattles into the space beside her and she nods her head for the other wolf to join her. "Was the wolfsbane, if you're really askin' and not just wanting to be a dick for no reason."

where: the stables oct 2nd

with: ryan cross and tammie jones @rviner

★・・・・・・★

The time after their return from Kaslo are filled with bigger concerns for Ryan than the run gone bad. Like many things in his life before war, there is little time for recuperation. On your feet, boy. Shut the hell up. More pressing matters fill his thoughts and with them, his help at the farms stop entirely. The ban preventing Elliot and Isla from heading out is a focus of the Cross pack but even then, there is a gnawing in the back of Ryan's mind. How the years apart almost diminished between him and Tammie. Almost. Only to appear again to feel vaster than ever. The slow building friendship that formed during their time in Hollow Cove disappears too, and the two wolves are back at the start. Quick glances to one another in passing, held breaths and swallowed back words.

And yet he finds himself, on a slower day, etching towards the barns that the Jones' made their own. Just a ghost in comparison to Blue River Ranch, yet the hearty warmth of their pack is evident throughout. He knows it's Tammie that he approaches from the way she sits against the fence, taking a break and glancing through the scenery. And he also knows what she thinks. She's thinking of home, the scrunch of her nose and frown on her face making Ryan fight a smirk. "You good?" he chirps once close enough, slowing a few paces from her and settling his expression. "That new wolf, whatever the fuck he called, he healed up?" The distance may feel further than ever but the issue with them has always been their familiarity, knowing one another a little too close for comfort. So, Ryan can no longer stave the smirk from appearing. "I wanted to come see if you're still pissed or if it was the wolfsbane makin' you a God damn nightmare."