#tamagotchi are one of the few happier childhood memories i have

[novadreii]

I really really ~really~ want a tamagotchi. But they are $40 and up! Childhood == commodified.

[littlest-nightingale]

little! 13th Doctor because I've talked ab her as a caregiver but not as a little:

 • oh my god. she is a DISASTER

 • she goes to great lengths to hide her regression/not regress. like she is FIGHTING IT

 • about... 1-3 years old? she's little little

 • i genuinely don't think she had an entirely pleasant regression the entire time she was the doctor. i actually think she was that miserable. like maybe there were some regressions that were enjoyable but i think she was lonely and upset most of the time

 • she was absolutely desperate not to let the fam know. She didn't want them to think she was weak, and she definitely didn't want them to see her when she was so helpless.

 • part of it was definitely because this regeneration was a woman! lots of people started treating her differently when she regenerated into a woman, and part of that was that people thought she was weaker or dumber or more incompetent. So she definitely didn't want people to know she regressed! she didn't want to be viewed as more incompetent than people already seemed to view her as.

 • it was also because she was running from her issues. regression takes away what little filter she does have. if she was to regress and say something about the stress she was under, the fam would definitely start pushing her to talk about it, which she very much doesn't want to do!

 • finding out about the timeless child ordeal broke her. She had an entire childhood she couldn't remember because it was taken from her! and, because we know she could remember little glimpses of it, what if regression allowed her to remember. little bits and pieces. little glimpses into tecteuns experiments. maybe even the few times she was forced to regenerate.

 • after finding out, regression wasn't safe for her! memories she wasn't even supposed to have started slipping through the cracks, and unfortunately, her regression isn't entirely voluntary.

 • it didn't help that she spent 19 years in isolation immediately afterwards. she was stuck in that cell and she would regress and she would remember and there was nobody there to help her through it.

 • and even afterwards, she didn't open up about it. ever. She pushed through, she regenerated, and that was it.

 • in terms of regression gear, she has quite a lot. that doesn't mean she uses it.

 • 10, 11, and 12 were also regressors. 10 got a metric fuckton of regression gear and that collection has been modified and added on to with each new regeneration.

 • most of this is kept in a nursery/playroom originally made for 10, which she has asked the TARDIS to hide down the longest hallway she could generate (sometimes the TARDIS pushes the room forward. 13 doesn't take that well)

 • she keeps one stuffed animal in her room. one raggedy stuffed giraffe clara had gifted 11. it is hidden under her bed next to a teether and a box of stim toys

 • given her just. general autism. and how she is. she can get away with alot. she can have stim toys. she can stop talking. she can have cute onesie pajamas. you get the idea. so at least she has that.

 • but stepping away from the absolute misery, here's some happier ones:

 • i think there were positive regression triggers, even if she suppressed it. like at Yaz's grandma's wedding, when they were doing the henna tattoos (i believe that's what they were? im not too familiar with the culture, excuse me if i am wrong and feel free to correct me) as well as the fez, and getting her new clothes!

 • She has a tamagotchi! She is very good at taking care of it, despite it all. She also has a ds with Nintendogs, which was previously used by 11. it's modded so she can have more dogs than the game allows =]

 • she has matching bracelets with her giraffe plush!

 • Shes got a blanket with stars on it, sometimes she lays on top of it with her nightlight on because. sparkly

 • she draws on herself. yes she has paper yes she could draw on a more permanent surface but it's more fun to draw on herself