#talking to ppl is so fucking exhausting and then i get lonely like it isnt the consequences of my own dumb ass

[heliianth]

i miss my friends

[whimsicalgoose]

ok ok I would like to bust down the sniperscout autism4autism bc its consuming me

sniper's autism: can only talk so much till he's genuinely exhausted (which isn't a lot). he doesn't find reason in emoting a lot unless the situation calls for it. for this reason, people don't really hang out with him except out of pity because he seems "lonely". in other words, ppl have always thought he's sorta boring. sniper got tired of humoring ppl who talked to him to make THEMSELVES feel better, so he just sorta. keeps to himself. its easier that way, and he enjoys it.

scout's autism: he has to talk and talk and talk and talk and be soooo funny so people will actually like him. unfortunately, this just drives people away and makes them think he doesn't know how to shut up. scout used to easily forget what he's said in conversation because he was too focused on keeping the other person's attention, but he's gotten better. after so long of basically getting his spirit broken throughout his childhood, he found it was easier to be loud/dickish on purpose. partially out of spite, partially because he was tired of seeing himself as the dweeb that couldn't make any friends.

even just platonically, they work out perfectly together. scout can talk about whatever the fuck he wants and sniper can just listen. and scout knows sniper doesn't think he's unbearable and that he's actually listening. and sniper knows scout isnt just doing it because he thinks sniper is all alone, its because he likes his company!!! and scout thinks sniper is literally the greatest person on earth for not shutting him out and even inviting him to just sit with him. and sniper thinks scout is the most understanding guy he's come across, ever, for not demanding too much of him.

(sniper feels bad that scout was ever treated like he was stupid just because he was forgetful and talked a lot. scout feels bad that sniper had to protect his peace so hard that he had to separate himself from his peers (scout wouldn't know what to do if he was alone))

anywho yeah I'm normal i love them an average amount. even if by some chance im not any sort of neurodivergent, i undoubtedly came across as an autistic kid when I was very young, considering how I was treated. i projected very hard on scout. i hope I didn't step on any other autistic ppls toes with this!