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sheps-shepherd · 4 years ago

Text

Title: Perfectly Perfect

Pairing: Mikleo/Sorey; Mikleo & Sorey

Rating: T (for non-explicitly implied sexual content)

Written for @sormikweek 2020 Day 8: New Moon - New beginnings; Blank page / El Nath - Neutrality for good or evil; Symbolically called the Shepherd

A/N: This is by far my favorite piece that I wrote for the entire week. It's also the piece that started the whole idea to use this week to expand this universe that I'm really excited to build on and share. Expect not only the rest of the week's prompts, but many more independent works from this world.

"This world" being a BBC Merlin AU in which magic is illegal, Mikleo is a sorcerer hiding who he is, and Sorey is a prince living his best sunshine life. In case you haven't heard that spiel already.

Enjoy!

Read on AO3

---

“What if I changed my name?”

Mikleo turned from the spellbook he was reading with a smile on his lips, sure that Sorey would greet him with a matching one. But Sorey wasn’t even looking at him, let alone smiling. He was standing by the window, arm braced against the stone wall above it, staring out into the courtyard with a shadowed look on his face. Mikleo’s smile faded. He’d been catching Sorey with that kind of look on his face more often these days than he liked.

“Where did that come from?” Sorey offered a half-hearted shrug and stayed silent. Mikleo didn’t buy it for a second. He closed the book and stood from his spot, crossing over to the other side of the window. “Is this about the coronation tomorrow?” Sorey winced like he’d been hit, which was as good as an admission in Mikleo’s eyes. “Sorey, it’s okay to be nervous-”

“That’s not it,” Sorey said, shaking his head insistently. “It’s not nerves.”

“Then why have you been thinking about changing your name?”

Sorey’s jaw worked like he was wrestling with the words inside his mouth. Mikleo waited patiently, leaning against the wall as he watched his prince.

King, Mikleo mentally corrected himself. Today was the last day that Sorey would be a prince. Although, in Mikleo’s opinion, Sorey had been a king for a long while already; it just hadn’t been official until now.

“Because I don’t think I can do it.” Mikleo opened his mouth, ready with another protest. But Sorey finally turned to look at him, and the shadows hiding in the green of his eyes made him pause.

Sorey finished, “I don’t think I can take the crown if I still have his name.”

“Sharing his name doesn’t mean anything. You couldn’t be more different than him.”

“I know that. I know that, but….” Sorey squeezed his eyes shut and bowed his head. “Mikleo, I can’t stop thinking about it. And if I can’t stop thinking about it, then how can I expect anyone else to?”

Mikleo reached out, placing his hand on Sorey’s shoulder as gently as he could. The muscle beneath his palm was taut with what he now understood was several days worth of stress and anxiety - this had been on Sorey’s mind for a while, probably ever since Velvet’s abdication.

No. Probably longer than that.

“You’re not Artorius, Sorey,” Mikleo said. The name tasted vile on his lips, and hearing it made Sorey flinch again. “You could never be. The darkness in him didn’t come from his name. It doesn’t work like that.”

“But that’s what I’m talking about,” Sorey argued weakly, cracking his eyes open and peeking back over at him. “It feels like that, doesn’t it? It’s like it’s a curse now. No one wants to say it. No one wants to hear it, and I’m supposed to accept his crown in front of the entire kingdom like I don’t know that’s what everyone watching will be thinking?” He pushed himself away from the wall, away from Mikleo. His hand went up to tangle in his hair. “I won’t do that, Mikleo. I can’t.”

“Sorey,” Mikleo said, as calmly as he could with his heart racing so frantically in his chest. “This is your destiny. You accepting the crown tomorrow was the only thing in Camlann’s history ever meant to be set in stone. And no, not everyone is going to understand that, but you will. You do.”

“But what does knowing that change? That becoming king of the kingdom Arthur broke should make me feel good? That doing it with his name should make me feel proud? Because I don’t feel anything but afraid.” Sorey raked his fingers the rest of the way through his hair, the strands sticking out wildly in their wake. Mikleo had always poked fun about how Sorey’s hair seemed to constantly look some semblance of messy, but there was nothing charming about seeing it that way now. “Arthur wasn’t even my real father, but I’m still destined to get stuck with all his mistakes? I know destiny means a lot to you, Mikleo, but that doesn’t solve anything.”

Mikleo’s magic stirred in his chest. It trembled in the anxious atmosphere that had filled the room like it understood it had become a topic of their conversation. No one knew the burdens that came with destiny as much as Mikleo did. Not even Sorey.

His magic strained against his fingertips. He knew what it wanted to do. He let it.

“You aren’t destined to be stuck with any of Artorius’ mistakes.” Mikleo looked back to the window and felt his magic rush out of him. The latch clicked and the window pane creaked open on purposely rusty hinges. A gust of wind flew into the room, buoyed by the sweep of his magic as Mikleo focused back on his king.

As he expected, Sorey’s eyes were wide; he still got starstruck every time he saw Mikleo’s eyes flash amethyst, even though he’d seen it plenty of times at this point. The breeze blew through Sorey’s hair, righting the strands that had been tousled in his frustrated pulling, circling around his head like a halo until it deemed every piece in its place. It sent his earrings fluttering across his cheeks as it swept down towards his shoulders and dispersed with a flutter of his sleeves. Sorey still stared at him, wonder replacing the shadows that had haunted his eyes. Mikleo stared back.

“You’re destined to fix them.”

Sorey - who was Mikleo’s destiny, and always would be - blinked slowly. Mikleo watched the anxiety bleed out of him, watched as his shoulders dropped and his fingers uncurled and his face softened. He suddenly looked exhausted, but it was better than seeing him look so hopeless.

“Yeah,” he said softly. “Yeah, okay, that was what I needed to hear. Thanks, Mikleo.” He brought a hand back to his face and rubbed at his eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to dump all that on you.”

That sounded more like the Sorey he knew. “Don’t apologize. If anything, I wish you had dumped this on me sooner.” He crossed the room again, and this time Sorey was there to greet him with a hand at his waist and a sheepish smile. “But I should have realized this wasn’t as easy on you as you were making it seem, so I’m sorry.”

Sorey opened his mouth, paused, then closed it again, like he had changed his mind about what it was he wanted to say. “It’s not easy,” he admitted finally, and Mikleo was sure he’d scrapped some kind of I’m fine, don’t worry about me speech. “It’s… been a lot to process. And sometimes it feels like I don’t have enough time to go through it all.”

“You don’t have to go through it all right now,” Mikleo said. “And you don’t have to go through it by yourself, either.” He placed his hand on Sorey’s arm, squeezing carefully. “I know Velvet’s leaving, and I’m not her, but-”

“I don’t want you to be like Velvet.” Sorey reached up to press his other hand against Mikleo’s cheek. “I want you to be you. Who else is going to tell me when I’m in over my head or being too dumb?”

“Velvet, but I see your point.” And his Sorey really was here again, because he threw his head back and laughed. A full, rich sound that made Mikleo think of sunshine - or maybe there were just things about Sorey that still left him starstruck, regardless of how many times he’d seen them. “As long as you’re okay with me taking up that mantle,” he continued once the other’s laughter died down, “I suppose that settles that.”

“I’m more than okay with it.” Sorey cocked his head then, staring at Mikleo with a fond grin on his face. “Sometimes thinking about all the destiny stuff makes my head spin, but I know it’s not all bad. After all, destiny brought me you….” His green eyes sparkled with mischief as he snuck his thumb beneath Mikleo’s fringe of hair, tracing across the skin of his forehead right beneath where his circlet rested. “...Luzrov Rulay.”

Like clockwork, Mikleo’s magic rose to the call. It swirled wildly in his chest, an involuntary spark that shot through his bones. The feeling wasn’t as alarming to him now as it had been when he was young with no idea of where it was coming from, which had resulted in his mother gifting him the circlet in the first place. Mikleo hadn’t felt that terrifying slipping feeling again until he met Sorey, although he eventually realized it wasn’t a rebelling of his magic, but instead an answer. The tampering enchantment he wore did nothing to block Sorey’s voice if he called, and Mikleo’s magic would never ignore their king. It pulsed in his palms, spiked aches in his knuckles on its way down to his fingertips, and then Mikleo felt the tell-tale rush that came with the beginning of a spell.

The window pane swung back and closed itself. The latch clicked. The drapes drew themselves shut with just enough of an opening for a sliver of light to keep the room dimly lit. But Mikleo still saw the stars that twinkled to life in Sorey’s eyes, also like clockwork as his own eyes flickered back to amethyst.

Sorey’s thumb moved again, now tracing a gentle path below his eye, watching intently for the moment the amethyst faded back to his natural blue. “There we go,” he murmured, and his magic sang from the praise as it settled back into his blood where it belonged.

Which then shot up to Mikleo’s face and burned his cheeks. “You know I hate it when you do that.”

“You know that I hate it when you use magic around me when I can’t fully appreciate it. It was only fair.”

“I was just trying to remind you.” He cleared his throat. “Which it seems I did.”

“You did.” Sorey’s other hand came up, and he tipped Mikleo’s head back as he properly cupped his face. “You definitely did.”

Sorey kissed him, and his magic simmered happily. It was all Mikleo could do to hold onto Sorey’s arms as he leaned into him, all warmth and comfort as Sorey thanked him in his own way.

Mikleo let him take his fill, felt his head begin to get that floaty feeling that came with Sorey’s more intense kisses; the kind of kisses they shared when they were alone that often built into something more, which were finally becoming more common between them, much to Mikleo’s delight. But when he felt one of Sorey’s hands leave his cheek in favor of moving down to press against the small of his back, Mikleo reluctantly twisted his face away, and brought his own hand up to keep the other at bay when he tried to follow.

“Wait,” he said, and Sorey’s pout was immediate. Mikleo pointedly ignored how cute it made him look. “The name thing. You need to tell me more about that first, before we get distracted.”

Sorey blinked. “Oh. That.” His brow furrowed thoughtfully. “Yeah, that wasn’t supposed to spiral into what it did. I really did just want your opinion.” His fingers flexed nervously at the small of Mikleo’s back. “So, what do you think? About maybe changing my name?”

“I think the question you should be asking me,” Mikleo answered, “is what I think of whatever name you’ve already picked out.”

Sorey was surprised enough to take a step back, and Mikleo rolled his eyes. “Honestly, Sorey, I’m not stupid. You wouldn’t have brought it up to me at all if you hadn’t gotten that far with it.” The pout returned. Mikleo ran his hands up Sorey’s arms, settling on his shoulders where he gave him a light shake. “Come on, tell me.”

“I really can’t get anything past you, can I?” Sorey sighed and straightened his shoulders. “I thought about just taking Velvet’s name. I mean, it would have made sense. The Crowe family is technically the one that should be on the throne. But.... I didn’t like the way that made me feel either. I’m not really Velvet’s brother any more than I was Arthur’s son.”

Mikleo opened his mouth, but the hand on his cheek shifted to cover it before he could speak. “And I don’t mean that in a bad way,” Sorey hurried on. “I just mean I think I’m finally ready to make my own name. I don’t want to be defined by Velvet any more than I do Arthur. I think it’s time I finally start just being Sorey, don’t you think?”

He took his hand away, dropping it awkwardly onto the bend of Mikleo’s elbow. Sorey stared at him with the most hopeful look Mikleo had ever seen on his face, and he didn’t know if it was possible to fall in love with someone twice, but their relationship had braved greater unknowns than that.

“Yeah,” he said softly, “I do.”

The smile that split across Sorey’s face put the sun itself to shame.

“I like Shepherd,” he said, voice quiet like it was taking everything he had not to burst with excitement. “I thought it fit nice. I came from something simple, just like all the people I’ll be leading. I want them to know that.”

Mikleo nodded as his eyes stung with pride. Hearing that made him prouder than any ancient script of destiny ever could. His destiny was to make sure Sorey took the crown tomorrow, but Sorey made himself worthy of it all on his own.

“Sorey Shepherd.” It was like magic, sizzling on his tongue. “I like it, too. It’s perfect.”

You’re perfect, Mikleo didn’t say. Sorey looked happy enough to cry without hearing that part.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You’re right; it suits you.”

The pressure that suddenly appeared at the small of his back told him what Sorey’s next move was going to be, and he held up his hand again before Sorey could swoop back in. “But,” he chimed, maybe just a little teasingly as he watched impatience paint Sorey’s face, “to answer your original question, I think the whole thing’s a great idea. You of all people deserve a new beginning.”

Sorey smiled at him, something softer and more tender but just as warm. It matched the way he cradled Mikleo’s face. “You’re my new beginning,” he murmured. “You always were. You always will be.”

And while Mikleo would normally shove him for saying something so horribly cheesy, he let Sorey have that one. He wouldn’t have been able to stop the stupid smile that spread across his own face anyway.

Sorey’s fingers twitched against his cheek. “If there’s anything else from that spiel you want to talk about, you should say it now. Because once I kiss you again, I’m not going to be able to stop.”

Mikleo shook his head with absolutely nothing but fondness. He glanced over Sorey’s shoulder, eyeing the lock on his bedroom door, and his magic rushed to do his bidding. He heard the heavy click a moment later. The drapes were next with a glance over Sorey’s other shoulder, the sliver of light vanishing and shrouding them in darkness - but only for as long as it took Mikleo to light the candles on the walls.

The flickering flames sent shadows dancing across Sorey’s face, and Mikleo took a moment to appreciate the way he looked, just like he knew Sorey was doing as he felt his magic curl within him once more.

“No,” he answered, belatedly. “You can kiss me again.”

And Sorey, his sweet and shining king, was true to his word.

The next morning, His Majesty Sorey Shepherd of Camlann was formally sworn to the throne. The crown glittered where it nestled in his brown hair, caught by the sunlight streaming in through the windows as he stood on the dais, surrounded by his people. Rose and Zaveid were the ones who started the chant, passing it along to Velvet and Alisha and soon to everyone in the room. But Mikleo whispered his piece to himself, and his magic glowed with understanding. They would do everything they could with every bit of power they had to make sure the wish was fulfilled.

Long live the king.

#talesoffanfic #sormikweek2020 #sormik #sorey #mikleo #merlin au #tales of zestiria

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sheps-shepherd · 4 years ago

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Title: Dizzying Dynamics

Pairing: Mikleo/Sorey; Mikleo & Sorey

Rating: T (for non-graphic mentions of death/dying)

Written for SorMik Week 2020 Day 1: Waxing Crescent - Declaration; Commitment / Rigel - Benevolence; Happiness

*Reposted because Tumblr messed up my formatting so badly I just decided to redo it all.

A/N: This is my first time doing any kind of fandom week in three years so of course all the plans I had for it fell through, hence why this is being posted at the very last minute of the first day. I'm not the happiest with how this came out but it's fluffy and what more can any of us ask for.

All of my works for SorMik Week 2020 will take place in this same AU, which has its own story that I wanted to post before these and still haven't finished. It's a BBC Merlin AU, and all you really need to know is this: magic is banned in this world, Mikleo was born with magic, and Sorey is the sunshine prince we all love and deserve. Other necessary world-building happens within each work itself.

Enjoy!

Read on AO3

---

Mikleo was getting used to life in Camlann. Slowly but surely.

When his mother had first told him about the arrangements she’d made for him to come live in the capitol, he’d expected to spend a majority of his time with the grandfather he barely remembered in the medical wing of the castle, studying the basics of being a physician by day and honing his magic under the cover of night. He’d expected to spend his days reading, picking herbs, and learning how to properly make various medicines and remedies. Which was okay with him; Mikleo liked to learn, and these types of things were good to learn, and when he went home to Elysia maybe he could put it to use and be more than just the quiet village boy with the magical secret he couldn’t tell anybody.

As it turned out, living in Camlann was nothing like that. Mikleo honestly should have known better, especially when he ended his first week by saving the crown prince’s life and agreeing to take up the mantle as his manservant.

“Which is a completely glorified title, by the way,” Sorey had told him, on his first official day with his new title, when Sorey had come to get him before he could start worrying about what he was meant to do. “All the things you’re technically supposed to be doing, I’m capable of doing myself. And I don’t mind doing them either. That’s why I always told Arthur I never needed one.”

“What am I supposed to be doing then?” Mikleo had asked, and Sorey had smiled at him like that was the funniest question he’d ever been asked.

“Stopping wannabe assassins from killing me, apparently,” he’d responded, in a tone that was definitely way too bright and cheerful for the words they’d been paired with. Mikleo had found out right then and there - Sorey Collbrande-Crowe was fearlessly and unapologetically optimistic.

If Mikleo was being honest, it was rather refreshing to be around someone like that.

He spent most of his time with Sorey after that first week. When Sorey was in meetings or off wherever his princely duties took him, Mikleo was out doing all the things he originally expected to be doing. The times in between were spent wandering the castle and getting into absolutely everything they could find.

They spread out maps across the large table in the drawing room. They snuck cooling pies off the windowsills in the kitchens. They read all kinds of things in the library: history books to fables and fairytales to preserved journals. But Mikleo’s favorite times were the nights they holed up in Sorey’s room, with books or treats or stories to share.

Despite the odd circumstances that got them to this point, they became friends. Genuine friends. The prince-and-technically-servant dynamic didn’t exist.

But the prince-and-secret-sorcerer one certainly did. To Mikleo, at least. The magic in his blood always seemed harder to ignore whenever he was in Sorey’s presence, a glaring reminder of the impassable space that stretched between them.

He was lying next to Sorey in the prince’s bed, propped up on pillows with one of the larger history books opened between them, his arm pressed warmly against Sorey’s when the thought hit him - that maybe he was in way too deep, and it had only been a few months.

Sorey was still the crown prince. Artorius was still his father who hated all things magic. Mikleo had long since given up his avoid the royal family at all costs plan, but falling asleep in the prince’s bed was definitely too far. Risky things like that would put him on the king’s radar, and if Artorius found out- If Sorey found out-

But we’re already here, Mikleo considered, one afternoon spent watching Sorey scribble away, annotating tomes in the library. This will just be where we stop. No farther. No problems. There was no reason he and Sorey couldn’t be friends; Mikleo just had to tread a little more carefully moving forward. Simple. Even his magic seemed satisfied with that plan, glowing in his chest when Sorey peeked up from his work and smiled at him, and Mikleo smiled back.

And then the second assassination attempt had happened. And Mikleo had saved Sorey again. And then Sorey had saved Mikleo. And Mikleo spent the days recovering from being poisoned by staring up at his bedroom ceiling and wondering how the hell he ended up here.

Some destiny this turned out to be.

“Hello? Anybody home in there?”

Mikleo blinked his reverie away, turning his head to see Sorey standing there, dressed to the nines in his street clothes, head cocked with a curious look on his face. He beamed when Mikleo focused in on him.

“There you are! You spaced out on me.”

“Oh.” Mikleo gave his head a shake, as if clearing the last of the thoughts away. “Sorry about that.”

“Go somewhere good?” Sorey asked, nudging Mikleo over a step so they were back on the cobblestone road. Mikleo hadn’t even noticed he’d pulled them off. “Or is this a side effect of poison recovery that you didn’t tell me about?”

“Sorey, I’m fine. Just a little tired. Stop blaming everything on my recovery.”

“Just checking,” Sorey sang before taking a bite out of his apple - which him grabbing from the kitchen as they left had sparked their usual argument of: “That’s not breakfast.” “It totally counts as breakfast.”

Sorey was impossible, in the most endearing way.

“But,” the prince continued after swallowing his bite, “if you are fine, that means you shouldn’t have any problem making good on our deal today. Sure you don’t want to change your answer?”

Mikleo rolled his eyes. “Are you sure you don’t have anything better to do with your day then talk about poison?”

“Nope!” Sorey grinned around another crunch of his apple. “Already checked with Arthur. He actually thinks it’s a great idea that I do some research about this kind of stuff.”

“It is a good idea,” Mikleo agreed. “You were bound to have one sooner or later.”

“You wound me, Mikleo.” Sorey clutched at his shirt, and Mikleo rolled his eyes again at his dramatics.

Impossibly endearing. And maybe the slightest bit mortifying, too.

“I’d guess most people wouldn’t be so excited to research different kinds of poisons,” Mikleo mused as they stepped off the castle road and headed into the Lower Town. They fell in step beside each other, their arms brushing as they walked, assuring they didn’t lose each other in the morning rush of townspeople. “A bit morbid, don’t you think?”

Sorey shrugged. “Maybe. But I’m not like most people.” He gave Mikleo a cheeky grin. “What’s your excuse, huh?”

I’m not like most people, either.

“Gramps doesn’t like to leave things half-done,” Mikleo said aloud. “It’s something I need to know as a physician.”

“But shouldn’t it be something I need to know as the you-know-what? Why isn’t that something Arthur had me studying already?”

“That’s what physicians are for.” Mikleo was quiet for a moment, then carefully bumped his shoulder against the other’s. “That’s what I’m for. I have to be doing something as your manservant.”

Sorey chuckled, but the light in his eyes was dimmed as he looked over. “I know,” he said softly, and Mikleo could just barely hear him over the dull roar of people. “But you got hurt because I didn’t know better, and I’m not okay with that.”

“Sorey, you saved me-“

“You wouldn’t have needed saving if I had known in the first place.”

“You are not the reason I was poisoned,” Mikleo insisted. “The maid who put the poison in your drink is the reason.” He crossed his arms. “And again, you saved me by going out and getting what Gramps needed to make the antidote. So we’re both still here and we’re both fine. We’re even.”

“Are not.” Sorey chewed another bite of apple. “We’re two-to-one. Or have you forgotten about saving my life when we first met?”

Mikleo rolled his eyes again, but couldn’t stop the smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Of course not.” But as far as Mikleo was concerned, that was a debt Sorey had already paid back in full.

He didn’t admit it out loud, but Sorey must have read something in his expression, because he smiled and gave Mikleo a nudge of his own.

“Guess we’re just gonna have to keep saving each other and see where we end up, huh?”

“Yeah,” Mikleo murmured. “I guess so.”

Sorey suddenly wrapped his arm around Mikleo’s shoulders and tugged him into his side. He blinked as he found himself pressed against the prince’s chest, his hand coming up to steady himself so he wouldn’t completely crash into the other. His hand landed at the center of Sorey’s chest, right where he had grasped it a moment ago.

He tipped his head back, knowing his face was probably bright red but also ready to demand just what Sorey thought he was doing. Then the group of children came hurtling by, practically trampling over one another as they raced down the cobble, calling out hello’s to Sorey as they ran along.

“Be careful, guys!” Sorey called back. “Watch where you’re going! Don’t run anybody over, I can’t save ‘em all!”

The children laughed but didn’t show any signs of slowing down. The little boy bringing up the rear of the group bounded past them.

“I got them, Sorey!” he exclaimed. “Don’t worry!”

“Thanks, Videl. I’m counting on you.” Sorey tossed his half-eaten apple at the boy, who caught it gleefully. “Say hi to your mom for me, yeah?”

“Okay! Bye, Sorey!” Videl took a large bite of the apple and turned around to chase after his friends.

It wasn’t until Sorey was pulling away that Mikleo realized he hadn’t even thought about trying to pull away himself, which he certainly could have done once the crowd of children had passed. The realization made his face grow even warmer. Sorey’s hand staying between his shoulder blades definitely didn’t help.

“You good?” Sorey asked, taking a half-step forward to see Mikleo’s face. “Still have all your toes?”

“Ah.” Mikleo cleared his throat. “Yes. I’m fine. Thank you.”

Sorey studied him thoughtfully. The sun was behind him in the sky, silhouetting his messy hair and casting odd shadows across his face, but Mikleo could make out smears of pink across the apples of his cheeks from the heat. He hoped Sorey chalked the redness on his own face up to that, and not to poison recovery or other things.

The beaming grin that broke out across Sorey’s face surprised him. But really, he shouldn’t have expected otherwise.

“I believe that evens our score then,” the prince chirped. “Two for you and two for me.”

“Evens our-?” Mikleo sputtered petulantly. “You did not save my life from a group of children.”

“And have you ever been bowled over by a bunch of kids on the run before? Because trust me, Mikleo, it is not fun.”

“Why am I not surprised you got yourself into something like that?”

“Hey, be nice about it! I had bruises for weeks!”

They bickered back and forth as they headed down the road again, continuing their walk through the town. There were no more clusters of rambunctious children trying to barrel through them, but Sorey still kept his hand on Mikleo’s upper back, fingers hooked comfortably around his shoulder. And Mikleo let him, telling himself it was because their playful banter was distracting him and nothing more. The magic fizzling beneath his skin made sure to let him know he wasn’t fooling anyone.

Living in Camlann was absolutely nothing like Mikleo had expected it to be.

But he was in way too deep to do anything about it now, so he might as well enjoy it.

#talesoffanfic #sormikweek2020 #sormik #sorey #mikleo #merlin au

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sheps-shepherd · 4 years ago

Note

For the worldless "I Love You" prompts - Asch and Natalia, either 3, 4, 5, 20, 38, or 47? (These kids are just too dang cute). Also I totes feel you on the pressure thing so please only do this if it is enjoyable 💛

I picked out two for you because I super hecking appreciate you <3 I hope you like them!

38. Letting them warm their cold hands under your shirt.

Natalia’s favorite season was spring. When the last snowfall had finished melting and the grass grew green again and she could start planning what flowers to put in her father’s window boxes in the coming weeks.

It was decidedly not winter, despite her love for the holidays. Too cold, too blustery, too many nights spent watching the snow fall outside her window while clutching her phone to her chest, waiting for Asch’s text that he’d gotten home safely.

Not to mention that walking across campus in the whipping wind that came with the fall semester was one of her least favorite things to do. She’d already sacrificed her headband to spare her ears from the biting cold, and didn’t think she could sink any further into her scarf. Her fingers were freezing, even inside her gloves, no matter how many warm puffs of breath she blew into them. And considering the time on her phone was telling her that Asch was almost ten minutes late now, she was not happy; pretty fairly so, if she did say so herself.

She was in the process of taking her glove off to call him when Natalia heard the heavy groan of a door opening a few feet from where she stood. Asch was a dark blob as he walked out of the building, the length of his ever-vibrant red hair hidden beneath the black of his winter coat.

“I know, I know,” he said, before she could, slinging the strap of his bag over his shoulder as he came to stand in front of her. “I’m sorry, the students wouldn’t stop asking me questions. Once the professor mentioned I help grade their exams, all hell broke loose.” He blew out a breath, and it puffed out from between his lips like smoke.

He brushed the faux fur of his hood away from his face, looked her up and down once, and said, “You look like you’re freezing.”

“Well,” Natalia replied, sounding just a bit miffed, “we can’t all be walking space heaters.”

Asch arched an eyebrow at her comment. “I told you that coat wasn’t going to be warm enough,” he pointed out. Natalia pursed her lips, because maybe he’d been right, but she’d been perfectly fine that morning and hadn’t expected the drop in temperature to feel as harsh as it did. She blamed the wind.

“Take me home and you won’t have to worry about me being warm enough,” she said instead. “I know you have a report to do, but I thought we could at least-”

She cut herself off as she ducked into the crook of her elbow to sneeze.

“-Excuse me,” she said, and punctuated it with a sniff.

“I can come over for a few hours,” Asch said, answering her unspoken question. He reached for her as she straightened back up and tightened the knot of her scarf beneath her chin. “I can’t stay late, I promised Luke I’d help him study for his exam tomorrow morning.”

Natalia reached beneath his hands and grabbed the zipper on his coat. “Which I’m sure you’re doing just out of the kindness of your heart,” she mused, tugging the zipper down. She watched the corner of his mouth twitch.

“He offered to take dish duty for a week before I said anything.”

“Ah, there it is.”

He gave her a true smile as she pulled the zipper free and promptly slipped her arms around him. It was toasty warm beneath his coat, his body heat clinging to the fabric of his sweater where she buried her face. His arms shifted around her, wrapping her sides in the lapels of his coat as his hands rested at the small of her back.

“You need to get a new coat,” he murmured into her hair.

“My coat is fine,” she insisted. “And besides, I have you for when it’s not.”

Natalia’s fingers found the hem of his sweater. Without hesitation, she slipped them under, seeking the searing warmth she’d come to associate with him.

She felt him startle in her arms as her chilled, gloved hands pressed against his back. “Geez, Talia,” he said, squirming beneath the new chill on his skin, but he didn’t push her away. “I didn’t take that long.”

“Space heater,” she repeated, and he squirmed some more as her equally cold nose pressed against his neck.

Asch sighed, resigned, and Natalia smiled.

“I have a blanket in my car,” he said after a moment. “You can wrap yourself up in that until we get home.”

“Okay,” Natalia replied, making no move to let him go. She could feel her fingers beginning to spark with warmth, rejuvenating like spring flowers pushing up through the ground, and drummed them idly on his back.

He tsked into her hair. “Spoiled,” he chimed, like they didn’t both know that was partly his fault.

She lifted her head to beam up at him. His lips were cold when he kissed her.

Natalia didn’t like the winter, but at least she had the boy she loved to keep her warm.

20. Washing their back/hair in the shower.

One of the things Asch had to accept when he and Natalia moved in together was the fact that he couldn’t take showers alone anymore. He’d expected that to bother him. Maybe it was because it was Natalia, but it didn’t.

Unless she was sleeping or in the middle of something she didn’t feel she could step away from, she showed up in the bathroom like clockwork; a few minutes after he’d turned the water on, right when he’d finished wetting the length of his long hair, he’d hear the door creak open and she would call out, “You haven’t been in too long, have you?”

What was he supposed to do, say no? Besides, having someone else to help him wash his hair was a nice perk, he had to admit.

Her timing was a little off today, though. He’d already finished washing the shampoo out of his hair when he heard the door open.

“You are not going to believe who I just got off the phone with.”

She didn’t wait for him to respond before she was telling him all about the associate that had called her to complain about a project they were meant to pitch tomorrow. He listened to her voice echo off the walls, to her clothes slapping against the rug where she threw them off.

“Jackass,” he offered when the curtain pulled back and he saw her, cheeks flushed with anger and her blonde hair hanging wildly around her face without her headband to keep it back.

“Of all the people I had to work with this time,” she continued, yanking the curtain closed again. She slipped past him to stand beneath the water, her back to him as she did so. “I swear he does it on purpose.”

Asch stretched past her for the washcloth as she continued on. He lathered it up with soap before gently pressing it to her shoulder blade.

She didn’t falter in her words as he carefully made his way down her back, dragging the cloth along both of her shoulders before lowering it to massage down each knob of her spine. He finished at her lower back, rubbing in broad strokes back and forth until she had said all she needed to get off her chest.

When she was quiet, he turned her so she faced him, and the water sprayed against her back. The anger had left her face, replaced with a tiredness that dulled her eyes.

Asch reached around her, smoothed his hand along her skin to help wash the last of the soap off. She leaned into him, humming when he trailed upwards to thumb circles against her neck.

“He’s a jackass,” he said again. “He’s probably having a conniption because he knows you’re smarter than him.” Natalia peered up at him. “And because you are, you’re going to have no problem working with whatever bullshit he threw at you, and you’re going to nail it tomorrow.”

He paused for a second, letting his words sink in, then said, “We’ll work with whatever bullshit he threw at you. I’ll help you revise it when we’re done in here.”

“Really?”

“Of course.”

Natalia exhaled the last of her sour mood. Without it, she looked even more tired, but that didn’t stop her from reaching for him. She ran her fingers up and through his bangs, gently raking them away from his face and over his head like he kept them when they were dry.

“Did you already wash your hair?” she asked softly, hopefully, and Asch could never tell her no.

“Washing it twice won’t hurt anything.”

She smiled up at him.

#aschtalia #asch the bloody #natalia kimlasca-lanvaldear #tales of the abyss #i missed writing these crazy kids tysm for requesting!!!#catch me praying tumblr doesnt heck my formatting up because i added tags #talesoffanfic

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sheps-shepherd · 4 years ago

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Title: Candlelight Concoctions

Pairing: Mikleo/Sorey; Mikleo & Sorey

Rating: T (for non-explicitly implied sexual content)

Written for @sormikweek 2020 Day 5: Waning Gibbous - Introspection; Receiving and Sharing / Capella - Eminence; Knowledge

A/N: At this time, not all of the week's prompts were completed, but I do plan on finishing and posting all of them as I get them done. I'm invested in this project of mine; they're getting done, I promise. For now, here is the next completed prompt!

In case you missed the memo: all of my SorMik Week 2020 prompts are taking place in a BBC Merlin AU where magic has been outlawed, Mikleo has magic, and Sorey is not only a prince but also Too Good for the world.

Apologies in advance if Tumblr messes with any of the formatting!

Enjoy!

Read on AO3

---

“Can I ask about the magic?”

The pattern of fingers carding through his hair didn’t falter with the question. Sorey continued to comb through the short strands, brushing his bangs back and away from his forehead. The action helped cool Mikleo’s heated skin and calm the magical frenzy that had been bursting inside him earlier. It was strange, to feel the touch of fingertips there instead of his circlet, but also far from uncomfortable. In fact, as he lay with his head pillowed on Sorey’s arm, pressed flush together in the small space the inn’s bed provided, Mikleo didn’t think he’d ever felt more comfortable in his life.

“Mhm,” he hummed, not opening his eyes as he basked in the warmth that came with being so close to Sorey. “You can ask me anything.”

His magic stirred at the mention, but Mikleo found the willpower to keep it shoved down. It had already had its fun, buzzing around inside of him as it chased each of Sorey’s touches, leaving him thoroughly hazy and exhausted now that they had finished. Now, in the aftermath, was the time for it to be just between him and Sorey. His magic would have to deal with that.

Surprisingly, it didn’t seem to put up much of a fuss. It quietly went back to rest, sated by their prince’s presence and affections, leaving behind the soft murmur Mikleo always carried with him. Just as comforting as Sorey’s touch.

“How long have you had it?”

“Forever. I was born with it.”

“Are all people who have magic born with it? Because, Velvet….” Sorey’s voice trailed off, like he was unsure of how to finish the thought. Mikleo didn’t need him to.

“I can’t vouch for everyone who has it,” he said, “but I think it’s more a matter of becoming aware that it’s there. Not everyone is as in-tuned with it, and not everyone’s is the same. It just depends on the user.”

“So you’ve always known about yours?”

“Mhm. My earliest memory is of laying in my crib and staring at the mobile my mother had hanging above it. She’d leave the window open so the breeze would make it spin, but I guess it was never fast enough for my liking. I sent it flying off the hook. Scared her half to death.”

Mikleo did remember: remembered opening his eyes that day and staring up at the stillness of the mobile, remembered the tiny cloth-sewn animals tauntingly waving the slightest bit, remembered the childlike want to see them dance and the not-yet-frightening feeling that rushed to fulfill his wish.

The fright came later, long after he’d outgrown his crib, as he watched the horror on his mother’s face grow deeper and deeper every time he had to tell her he hadn’t meant to do whatever it was his magic had done.

Now, Mikleo opened his eyes and saw the dark rafters of their inn room, just out of reach of the flickering light of the candle burning on the bedside table. He turned his head and saw Sorey - saw the smile that graced his face and the dopey look in his eyes. The sight of him made Mikleo’s mouth twitch. No one had ever looked so happy listening to him talk about his magic before.

“Who else knows?” was the next question. Mikleo hummed again, thoughtfully.

“My mother and my uncle. Gramps. Zaveid found out by accident a while ago, but I asked him not to say anything. I think Eizen and Edna suspect it and just haven’t brought it up yet.” He paused for a moment. “And Velvet.”

Sorey blinked in surprise. “Velvet knows?”

“She was the first person I told, actually. Back in Camlann, when her magic was first starting to show itself. She came to Gramps and I, and she was so scared… I couldn’t act like I didn’t know what she was going through.” He sighed softly and turned to stare back up at the ceiling. “And I was afraid. Of what might happen to her if she thought she was alone. Magic is so unpredictable; it thrives off of everything. I had people who helped me make sure it grew from something good. I wanted Velvet to have that too.”

Sorey was quiet, still diligently brushing his fingers through Mikleo’s hair. Mikleo didn’t push him to speak again, letting him have however much time he needed to process everything he’d said. Sorey’s family had always been a sensitive subject for him.

“Thank you,” he said finally, and the sentiment startled Mikleo into turning back towards him. Sorey’s face was still soft, even with the tinge of sadness that Mikleo could make out along the edges of his features. “For looking out for her. I think you’re right; she needed someone like that. Like you.”

“You were that someone for her, too.”

It was the right thing to say. Sorey’s answering smile drowned out some of his sadness. “And am I that someone for you?”

It was such a baiting statement, but Mikleo took it regardless. He wiggled his arm free from where it lay trapped between their bodies and lifted his hand towards Sorey’s face. He cupped the other’s jaw in his palm, his thumb brushing against his cheek and his fingers slipping through the sweat-damp hair at the nape of his neck. Green eyes watched him expectantly; Sorey’s gaze didn’t waver at the touch.

“Of course you are,” Mikleo murmured, and his efforts were rewarded with Sorey’s trademark grin, the one that outshined the sun and made Mikleo feel warm all the way down to his toes.

Sorey’s hand finally left his hair. Mikleo didn’t get a chance to miss the contact - Sorey wrapped that arm around his waist, tugging him into what Mikleo thought was meant to be a hug given the position they were laying in. It brought them closer together, enough for Sorey to lift his chin and be able to press a kiss to Mikleo’s forehead. Mikleo’s eyes fluttered in response. Between the comforting touches and the warmth radiating off of Sorey, he found himself fading fast.

He suddenly felt himself being shaken and opened eyes he didn’t remember closing. Sorey was still watching him as intently as before. Ever the child, Mikleo thought vaguely. Of course he isn’t tired yet.

“One more question?” Sorey asked softly, hopefully. Mikleo nodded against the pillow.

“One more.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Sorey’s tone wasn’t accusing. “I meant it when I said I wasn’t mad that you didn’t, but I want to know why. So I can fix whatever it is that made you feel like you couldn’t tell me.”

“Sorey.” Mikleo’s heart could have burst out of several things: relief, exasperation, love. “You don’t have to fix anything. That was never it.” He adjusted his hand so it laid more comfortably against Sorey’s cheek, stroking his thumb along his cheekbone. “It was all me. My entire life I’ve been told that I had to hide who I was, that no one could ever know about my magic. So I did. I never told anyone, not until Velvet.”

He paused again. Sorey waited for him to continue, watching with ever-patient eyes. He really wasn’t angry. And Mikleo was beyond grateful for him, not for the first time since they’d met.

“I wish I could have told you first,” he admitted quietly. “I don’t regret telling Velvet, or that Zaveid found out, but I wish it was you. It should have been.”

“Mikleo.” Sorey’s voice was just as quiet. “All that matters is you told me. I don’t care who knew first. I know now.”

“I care,” Mikleo pressed on. “It never felt right, keeping it from you. I wanted you to know, but… things got so complicated.”

Which was the understatement of the century, really. In fact, hiding his and Velvet’s magic had been the easy part of it all. The complications had all come later. Artorius denouncing Sorey and having to flee Camlann and constantly running around the continent trying to find a way to right all the wrongs while also not letting Sorey get himself killed-

“There was never going to be a good time,” Sorey spoke again, bringing Mikleo’s attention back to him before his mind could go through every scare Sorey had ever given him since they’d left Camlann. “This wasn’t any better than any other time you could have told me, okay?”

“I can think of one.”

“Oh, yeah? When?”

“Can’t you guess?” He tucked a brown curl back into place behind Sorey’s ear. “It was a night just like this one.”

Sorey’s eyebrows drew together as he thought about it. He was quiet long enough for Mikleo to consider admonishing him, because really, they hadn’t had many nights together like this before. They didn’t have that kind of time. But before he could open his mouth to start, Sorey’s eyes lit up and widened with understanding.

“That night?” Mikleo nodded, feeling a tiny smile tug at the corner of his lips. He did open his mouth this time, now with a teasing remark at the ready, but Sorey wasn’t really looking at him anymore. It was more like he was looking through him.

“That’s right,” Sorey continued, sounding distant, like he was talking out loud to himself instead of to Mikleo. “You said you had something to tell me. You said it was important, but you never told me what it was. You never had the chance….”

Sorey propped himself up on his elbow, the movement so quick and sudden that Mikleo started where he was laying. He stared up at Sorey, and Sorey stared back at him, and the length of his side felt cold and numb without his prince there to warm it.

“I stole your confession.”

Mikleo snorted at how horrified he sounded. “I would hardly say you stole it-”

“But I did!” Sorey squawked. “I told you I wanted to say my piece first and- And I was just so happy when you said you felt the same way about me that I-”

“I forgot, too.” Mikleo pushed himself up on his own elbows, giving Sorey as stern of a look as he could when he had nothing but affection to back it. “Don’t blame yourself. I was perfectly capable of stopping you and telling you. I just didn’t. And the next morning, I felt awful about missing a chance to tell you again, but definitely not about what I told you instead.”

Sorey still didn’t look convinced. So Mikleo shifted onto one elbow, mirroring the other’s position and inadvertently placing himself back into the warmth he’d just been missing. He ducked his head and placed a swift kiss against Sorey’s mouth, just to make sure he really had his attention. When he leaned back again, Sorey’s eyes were bright and focused on him.

“I know you have the kind of soul that always wants to take the burden so no one else has to,” Mikleo said softly, “but don’t, not with this. My magic isn’t yours to carry.”

And Mikleo could tell that was a point Sorey still wanted to argue. He could also tell that Sorey couldn’t stop the smile that took over his face.

“So on top of being the most powerful sorcerer to ever live, you can read souls, too? What else are you hiding from me, Mikleo?”

“Nice try, but that was your last question.”

“Good thing I don’t need to ask about this anymore, then.”

Sorey reached out with his free hand and cupped the back of his neck. He guided Mikleo in for a proper kiss, one that was soft and unhurried and made his magic sing. Sorey kissed him until every bit of him was warm again. Mikleo clutched at the bed sheet covering his hip and let him.

They fell back to the bed in opposite positions, Sorey now stretched out on his back with Mikleo’s head pillowed on his chest. But Sorey’s hand found Mikleo’s hair again, fingers twisting into the strands at the back of his head. It was grounding, and Mikleo was helpless against it. He didn’t bother trying to keep his eyes open.

“I’m really glad you told me.”

Sorey’s voice was quiet once more, laced with a newfound grogginess. Even he was getting tired now. Mikleo didn’t want to think about how late - or early, more likely - they’d stayed up together, and definitely didn’t want to think about how annoyed Velvet would be with them if she found out about it in the morning.

He pressed his face further against Sorey’s chest, hoping it brought the same sense of comfort that the other had been lavishing him with all night.

“Me too.”

It must have. Sorey only shifted - carefully, doing his best not to disturb Mikleo’s head on his chest - enough to blow out the half-burned candle. He tipped back into his previous position and cradled Mikleo close like he was something precious. “Night, Mikki,” he mumbled.

With his head rising and falling in time with his prince’s steady breathing, Mikleo fell asleep, his magic humming beneath his skin.

The next morning, after he’d finished dressing, Mikleo was trying to get his hair to look some semblance of presentable when he realized his fingers weren’t bumping against the cool metal of his circlet. He hadn’t even noticed he’d forgotten something that had been such an integral part of his morning routine for most of his life.

Silently chiding himself, Mikleo turned back towards the bed, only to find Sorey already standing behind him. The prince was dressed sans his cloak and had Mikleo’s circlet balanced between his fingers.

“May I?”

Mikleo nodded dumbly. Seeing Sorey so comfortably integrating himself into the magic world was apparently going to take some getting used to.

He kept his eyes trained on Sorey’s as the other came forward, stayed still as Sorey used one hand to brush his bangs out of the way and the other to guide his circlet back to its proper place. He fiddled with it for a moment, making sure it was settled firmly against Mikleo’s forehead, then swept his bangs back over it - hiding his deepest darkest secret away once again.

But now that Sorey knew, how deep and dark could it really still be?

“I’m glad it was something you didn’t feel like you had to bring up last night,” Sorey said suddenly, Mikleo blinking at the sound of his voice, “but I just want to make sure you know.” He reached down and grabbed Mikleo’s hands, clasping them and holding them between their bodies. “Your secret is safe with me. I won’t tell anyone, not even the others. Who knows and how they find out, that’s up to you. I’ll always be waiting right here if you need me. Okay?”

Mikleo could have cried. His magic sparked to life in his chest, and all he could do was croak out a simple okay even though there were a thousand things he wanted to say instead.

But somehow, Sorey seemed to understand every single one of them anyway. His smile was like sunlight and filled Mikleo with warmth just as fiercely as his kisses did - at least, that was what Mikleo told himself when he felt the burn in his cheeks as Sorey brought their joined hands to his mouth and kissed them.

“You ready?” Again Mikleo nodded, and again Sorey took the lead, dropping his hands in favor of wrapping an arm around Mikleo’s shoulders. “Then let’s go. I’m sure the others are already up and waiting for us.” He guided Mikleo across the room, grabbing his cloak with his free hand as they passed it. Leaving the room felt like walking away from something sacred - something Mikleo wished he could keep forever and take with him because it was theirs and no one else’s.

But at least, he considered as he wrapped his own arm around Sorey’s waist, wanting to be as close to his prince as possible, that’s the only thing I have to leave behind.

And that something would stay behind in that room forever, waiting for the next occupants to share their stories and add to it.

Maybe, at least, it could help somebody else tell someone they loved their own deepest darkest secret.

Hopefully their ending would be just as good as his.

#talesoffanfic #sormikweek2020 #sormik #sorey #mikleo #merlin au

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sheps-shepherd · 6 years ago

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@caffeinatedpoltergeist requested: “Asch and Natalia, flowers, secrets, midsummer”

Look the moment I realized this wasn’t going to be a nice little 1k fic like I originally planned I just said screw it and went with it. So I hope you don’t mind a 4k prompt fill :’)

Title: the soundtrack of my summer (you’ll always be my thunder)

Pairing: AschNatalia, with obligatory background twin!AschLuke sibling fluff

Rating: T

Tags: Canon Divergent Modern AU, Love At First Sight shenanigans, Luke being a little shit to show he cares

A/N: First off, “Thunder” by Boys Like Girls is the song that inspired both the prompt fill and the title. I highly recommend giving it a listen! It’s a good song. I can’t link it because Tumblr hates links now so just YouTube it. It’s there.

Second off, we all know Tumblr is absolutely asinine these days and lately has enjoyed eating any kind of formatting I try to put in a story. So 1) if that happens I’m really sorry and 2) I manually put in page breaks to try and avoid unreadable formatting in that scenario. I know it looks ugly. I’m calling myself out so no one else has to. You are all welcome.

Enjoy the story!

----

“I don’t want to leave yet.”

“We have to. It’s getting dark. We should’ve already been back by now.”

“I know. But… We’ll come back here, right?”

“Sure, we can come back tomorrow. Every day until I leave, if you want.”

“And after that?”

“It’ll still be here when I’m gone, Natalia.”

“But it won’t be the same without you.”

“...Then next summer. When I’m back.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

---

It was another traditional summer in Malkuth. Even so far south of the capital, the air was still hot and sticky against Asch’s face as he gave the trunk of the car a definitive slam shut. He normally didn’t mind the heat - not as much as Luke did, anyway - but even he was starting to feel uncomfortable with the way his shirt clung to his sweaty skin and his hair stuck down to the back of his neck. He’d put his hair up the second he’d clambered out of the car, but it had only helped for the first haul of luggage. Finishing the third, Asch had caught himself eyeing his brother’s short hair enviously a time or two and wondering if it was finally time the two of them looked alike again.

“I still don’t understand why you felt the need to bring half your bedroom. We’re staying for a week, not moving in.”

Luke’s cheeks were flushed pink from the heat and exertion as he puffed them in response to Asch’s quip. “I came prepared, that’s all! I don’t remember there being any rule about only having one bag.”

“Whatever, just go bring it inside.” Asch dug the car keys of out his pocket. “And I get the shower first, so don’t even try anything.”

“What? Why do you get it first?!”

“Because I’m older, so what I say goes.” The car beeped as it locked, and Asch stuffed the keys back into place as he hefted the bag he was carrying higher up on his shoulder and started the walk back across the parking lot. He heard the rustling of fabric as Luke scrambled to grab the last of the bags he was in charge of before scurrying after.

“By ten minutes, Asch! That hardly gives you rights to boss me around!”

“And yet, that’s never stopped me, has it?”

Luke muttered something under his breath that they both knew would appall their mother to hear, and Asch was readying himself to say as much as he reached out to pull open the door to the lobby, when said door swung open, narrowly missing his nose. He reared back in surprise.

“Hey, be careful-!”

“Oh, pardon me-!”

Asch froze. So did the blonde-haired, green-eyed woman in front of him. He blinked, thinking maybe some sweat had dripped into his eyes and was messing with his vision, because there was absolutely no way that could be-

Something slammed into him from behind, sending Asch teetering forward a step. “Ow! What the hell, Asch, you’re taking up the whole sidewalk here!” When Asch didn’t shoot back a witty reply or even so much as send a glare over his shoulder, Luke must have realized something was going on, and poked his head into Asch’s peripheral. “What are you-?”

The way Luke went just as still beside him all but confirmed what Asch was thinking. And ever the little shit, he blurted out, “Hey, don’t we know you?”

“Luke!” Now Asch whipped around to glare at his brother, not realizing just how close Luke had crowded himself against his shoulder. The movement jostled the bag nestled carefully in Luke’s elbow, sending it to their feet and scattering its contents out on the sidewalk.

“Oh, shit-!”

“You idiot-!”

“Here, let me-!”

All three of them knelt down, gathering everything up before anything had a chance to roll or get swept away by the wind. At some point, Asch was reaching for a stray tube of his mother’s lipstick, and pale fingers brushed against his, too slender to be Luke’s. He looked up only to find those olive green eyes already staring back at him, and that unsettling feeling of deja vu washed over him again.

“Um. Thank you.” He snatched his hand back, lipstick tucked against his palm, and quickly stood up. He heard Luke gasp out as the bag still on his shoulder loosened enough to knock into his cheek on the way up, but the woman standing with him kept his attention on her.

“Oh, no, it was my fault you dropped your bag. I’m very sorry.” Her cheeks flushed. “Um, excuse me, but I need to...” She motioned awkwardly with her hand, ducking her head as she side-stepped around him and hurried off down the sidewalk.

Asch turned his head to watch her go. He did nothing but stand there, even after he saw her climb into a car, until Luke popped back up next to him.

“Wasn’t that-?”

“Shut up, Luke.” Asch turned quickly, yanking open the door and storming his way inside, not bothering to hold it for his brother, hoping to give himself a few minutes of reprieve before the inevitable bombardment of questions.

No such luck.

“But that was her, wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Bullshit, you don’t,” Luke demanded. “That girl from the last time we were here? Natasha?”

“Natalia.” Even Asch cringed at how quick he made the correction.

“So it was her! And you couldn’t think of anything better to say to her?”

“Luke, it’s been seven years. She probably doesn’t even remember us.”

“I don’t know about that one, Asch. At least I’m pretty unforgettable.” Asch hiked up the bag he was carrying again, hearing Luke squeak in surprise as he tried to avoid both getting hit and falling down the stairs they were walking up. “Besides, I barely saw her back then. You’re the one that she-”

At the top of the stairs, Asch rounded on his brother, forcing him to stay on the top step to have those few inches of height over him.

“Just drop it, would you? Before we get back to the room. You’re going to get Mother worked up over nothing.”

“Are you going to talk to her?”

“No! That’s not why we’re here!”

“Right, we’re here on another dumb summer vacation to try and convince Mom that our family isn’t broken beyond repair! Asch, I swear, that summer was the last time I saw you that happy, and we both know why!”

“Don’t be ridiculous. We were ten, Luke. Nothing happened. So shut the hell up about it, or so help me Lorelei I will knock your ass back down these stairs!”

It was an empty threat - mostly, anyway - but it did the job. Luke sent a glare identical to his own up at him, but kept his mouth closed. When Asch decided he was sure to keep it that way, he turned back around and headed down the hall to their room. A grumpy Luke trudged after him, but his brother’s mood was the least of Asch’s worries.

He was going to take a shower, unpack, and forget the whole ordeal ever happened. And then he was going to try and make himself have a good time on this dumb vacation until he could go back to Belkend and put this whole mess behind him.

---

Their mother had already settled down in one of the beds and was fast asleep when the knocking started on their door. Asch looked up from his phone.

“Who’s that?”

“Dunno,” Luke said, distracted by his own phone’s screen. “Maybe it’s complimentary dessert or something.” Asch shoved at him on his way up from the couch, not bothering to start the argument about which one of them should get up to answer it.

Whatever he’d been expecting when he pulled open the door, Natalia had not been it. She stood out in the hallway, wringing her hands together at her chest, staring at him wide-eyed as they came face to face for the third time that day - three times more than Asch ever expected he’d get.

“Um. Hello.”

Asch knew it was rude not to return the sentiment, but he thought maybe he could have a pass this time, because his brain was too busy thinking up all the ways he could murder his brother right here in the hotel room without waking their mother to bother considering what an appropriate response might be.

As it was, his grand gesture boiled down to a simple, “Hi.”

Natalia cleared her throat. “I… I’m sure you don’t remember me, so I apologize if this seems strange-”

“No,” Asch said quickly. “No, I remember you.” He swallowed. “Natalia.”

Her eyes lit up, and her shoulders slackened with relief. Natalia smiled up at him.

“Well, then it’s nice to see you again, Asch.”

“You too.” Before the oncoming awkward silence could make its appearance, he continued on, “Can I ask what you’re doing here? It’s getting pretty late.”

“Yes, well,” Natalia reached up and tucked a slip of blonde hair behind her ear, “I came up here to ask if you would take a walk with me. The hotel gardens are still just as beautiful, and I thought since you haven’t been in a while…” She gazed up at him so hopefully, Asch felt something twist in his chest at the sight.

“Oh. Ah, actually, I-”

“You should go, Asch,” came an infuriatingly sweet voice from behind him. “I can always stay in case Mother wakes up and needs something. Plus, you did bring in most of our stuff. You deserve a little break, you know?”

Asch’s shoulders got a little stiffer with every word out of his brother’s mouth, and he looked over his shoulder to give Luke the most acidic glare he could manage - Luke, the cheeky bastard, just grinned back at him, knowing full well he’d stolen the excuse right out of Asch’s mouth, and used his own complaints from earlier that day against him to boot.

Natalia, no doubt sensing the rising tension between the twins, cleared her throat once more. “If now isn’t a good time…” She failed to mask the disappointment in her voice, and Asch knew he wasn’t being very courteous by making her feel so awkward in the midst of his and his brother’s silent feud.

“No,” he said, turning back to her. “No, now is fine. A walk through the gardens sounds nice.” Her face began to glow again, and she gave him another smile, and Asch knew he’d made the right choice. She stepped back as he came out of the room, and with one last look at his idiot twin’s smirking face, Asch shut the door.

That was how he found himself back outside, the air a little less stifling with the sun setting overhead. The sky was orange, but the quaint lampposts lined throughout the gardens were already shining, and Asch had to admit, it really was nice. He found he really didn’t remember much of what he saw as he and Natalia made their way around, but he did recall the green-painted bench that Luke had jumped off the back of and almost cracked his head open on, and the large map of the garden’s layout in the very center where he distantly remembered meeting the very girl beside him. If he noticed that Natalia lingered there when they came to it, he didn’t say anything about it.

They made small talk, only slightly awkward, mostly just asking about each other’s lives. They were both finishing their last year of high school - she was older than him, Asch had forgotten - and had both been on student council. He played the piano, she was learning flute. He liked to cook, she could barely make a passable grilled cheese. He had his mother and younger brother to take care of, she was planning on moving into her own apartment after graduation.

“But aren’t you and Luke still the same age? Surely he can take care of himself?”

“Please never say that in front of him. He’ll do something stupid, like believe you.”

He’d thought maybe that had been a bit offending, but it made her laugh - a rich and warm sound that carried away on the breeze and made the twist in Asch’s chest pull a little tighter.

He was in the middle of a story about some stupid thing Luke had done a few weeks ago when he realized that they weren’t on Choral Castle’s grounds anymore. They had apparently long since passed through the hotel’s gates, and not only that, but Natalia had gone strangely quiet, no longer making soft noises of affirmation to assure him she was listening. In fact, she seemed to be looking around dazedly, like she was waiting for something to jump out at her-

Asch stopped walking, voice catching in his throat. Natalia continued a few steps without him before realizing he’d broken their synchronization and stopped herself.

“Asch?”

“This isn’t what I think it is, is it?”

Natalia didn’t seem surprised by his outburst at all. She seemed more relieved by it, if anything.

“So you remember it, too.”

“It can’t still be here. It’s been years, Natalia, someone else probably found it and-”

“No, it’s still there. I check every time I come here, just to be sure.” Asch didn’t have time to press her for details before she was suddenly stepping off the path they’d been walking, climbing into the brush. “The entrance is right over here.”

“Hey, wait, you shouldn’t-” But Natalia ducked beneath some overhanging branches and disappeared into the greenery. Asch saw a few flashes of her blonde hair, and then she was gone, ignoring his calls for her to come back.

He looked up at the sky; it had morphed from orange to a smokey purple. It would be dark soon, and they still had to make the walk back, and he’d be damned if he let her get far enough away from him and make her go back alone. He poked through the mess of greenery, trying to find the path Natalia had made for herself, and followed her into the brush.

He came out the other side into an open clearing, remembering at the last moment the dip in the ground that he used to always trip on, and widely stepping over it. Natalia was waiting for him by the stone wall that ran along the far side of the area, visibly pleased to see him coming.

“Natalia, we shouldn’t be out here-”

“But we already are, so we might as well have a little visit, shouldn’t we?”

Asch glanced down at the crumbled section of the wall, the debris from whatever had wrecked it long since cleared away, leaving an opening between the stone. An opening he remembered being ten and climbing through, every day for a week that one fateful summer.

“You can’t be serious. We won’t be able to fit through there.”

“Excuse you. I fit through just fine, thank you.”

Asch deadpanned. “Last time I checked, I’m a bit bigger than you are. There’s no way.”

“You won’t know unless you try.”

“Natalia, it’s late. We’re already going to have to walk back in the dark. We shouldn’t waste anymore time.”

“Fine, then you can go back to the hotel if you’d like. I’d like to visit this place again.” Asch moved to get to her, but she was quicker, crouching down and sliding into the opening feet-first, pushing herself through - she was too far in by the time he reached the wall to try and pull her out.

“Natalia!” he called out, but there was no response. She was really going to make him go in after her. Perfect.

Sighing, Asch crouched down to get a look at the opening. It would be a tight squeeze for sure, but if he wiggled enough, he could probably manage to make it. At least, he hoped he would. Exhaling a curse, Asch ducked beneath the stone and began to climb through.

It was definitely a tight squeeze - it was just barely wide enough to fit his shoulders, and he had to catch himself on his hands to pull his legs through once he’d wormed his top half out. But once he was fully through and back on his feet, he looked up and-

Oh.

Oh, he’d forgotten how beautiful this place was. Not because he didn’t remember, but because his memories didn’t do it justice.

Their secret garden, they’d called it. A vast open field completely covered in flowers and plants wherever there was soil to be found. There were a few boulders to break up the floral monotony, and at the very end of it all was the cliff that overlooked the sea they used to hang their feet off of. The sound of rushing water and crashing waves filled his ears, and while the smell of pollen and flower petals was overwhelming, it sparked more memories in Asch’s head, reminding him of how everything had been the last time he was here.

Natalia had made herself comfortable in a certain patch of flowers, gently running her hands along the plants that surrounded her. She was watching him quietly, letting him have his moment before softly saying, “Welcome back.”

Asch stared at her for a long while before making his way over to her. “You’ve been back here, then,” he murmured, sitting himself down beside her. “Before now.”

She hummed softly, looking down at the blossoms around her knees. “Every summer since you left,” she admitted. “Though I gave up on waiting for you quite a while ago.”

Asch had known the topic would be brought up eventually. He hadn’t expected it to feel like such a blow to the chest to hear it, though.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I suppose it was silly to place such a heavy burden onto you when we were children. There were many things we had no control over, back then.” Her gaze flicked up, and she reached for him. “You have leaves stuck in your hair.”

Her fingers gently slipped through the long red strands of his hair, pulling the bits of foliage stuck there free with crinkling sounds that echoed loudly in his ears. Asch let her fuss over him, finding a blooming white flower nestled in the field in front of him to rest his eyes on.

“Luke got sick,” he said quietly. Natalia’s fingers faltered, pulled a little too hard on his hair and sent a tiny spark of pain down his neck. “My mother, she wanted to move to Belkend, so we’d be closer to his doctors in case something happened. My father refused to leave Baticul, because of his job and whatever the hell other excuses he made. So Mother packed Luke and I up herself and we left. And then, when the divorce went through…” He shrugged. “We just stayed there.”

“I remember trying to find you in Baticul for a while. You’d told me you lived there. Though I’m sure I would have ended up empty-handed, even if you had still been in the city.” Asch nodded dazedly. “...Is Luke okay now?”

“He’s fine. He’ll be on medication for the rest of his life, but at least it’ll be a long one.”

“I had no idea he’d ever been so sick. You truly can’t tell, he seemed perfectly normal when we spoke today-” One of Natalia’s hands flew from his hair to her mouth. “Ah, I mean-!”

Asch gave her a small smile. “Don’t worry about it. Luke’s not half as sneaky as he likes to think he is. I knew he had something to do with this the moment I saw you outside my door.”

Even in the fading light, he could see the blush that painted Natalia’s cheeks. “I-I’m sorry about this morning. My father and I come back here every summer, I wasn’t expecting to suddenly see you here… I wasn’t even sure I really had seen you, until Luke came and talked to me.”

“Trust me, the feeling was mutual. I think a part of me still thinks I’m dreaming this right now.”

“Well, if this is a dream, I’m not sure I ever want to wake up.” She smiled bashfully at him. “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again. I’d thought you’d forgotten about me after a while.”

Asch didn’t know what possessed him to bring his hand to her cheek, but he did, smoothing his thumb along her pinkened skin. Natalia barely flinched at the contact, and more so out of surprise than discomfort - the space between them was darkening fast. “No,” he said softly. “Never.”

Natalia reached up to rest her hand over his, her fingers slipping easily into the spaces left between his. “I’m glad,” she whispered. “This place never did feel the same without you.”

It felt natural to pull her close, like there was absolutely nothing else he could do besides kiss her. Her lips were warm against his in the cooling night air, chasing away the damp chill of the earth beneath them that had sank into his skin, untwisting the mess of denial and uncertainty that had knotted itself into his chest.

“Sorry,” he mumbled when he pulled back, only as much as he had to, “I didn’t-”

“Please don’t be.” She shifted closer to him, slid her arms around his neck. “If you hadn’t done it soon, I would have done it myself.” He had to chuckle at that, and she beamed, and her lips tasted so much better when she was smiling.

---

They stayed in the garden for a while longer, enjoying the privacy and making up for lost time. But when Asch’s phone told them it was well past midnight not counting the walk back they still had ahead of them, he finally convinced Natalia it was time to go. Back through the stone opening they went, Natalia giggling as she watched Asch worm his way through again, and that led to the first of many detours - detours that made the ten minute walk back to Choral Castle another ten minutes longer, but Asch found he really didn’t mind. Considering it was Natalia starting most of them, he figured she didn’t either.

He walked her to her room when they finally arrived back at the hotel, standing in the hallway outside her door with their fingers still laced together.

“Would you like to have breakfast with me tomorrow?” she asked him. “I’d love to meet your mother, and catch up with Luke.”

“Tomorrow.” He gave her hands a squeeze. “Sounds like a good place to start.”

Natalia’s smile was bright in the dimmed light of the hallway as Asch kissed her goodnight.

When he climbed up the stairs to head back to his own room, he found Luke sitting outside the door waiting for him. His brother scrambled to his feet when he saw him coming.

“I didn’t wanna call and interrupt anything,” he explained, “but I also didn’t expect you to stay out so long and I was getting kinda worried and…” Luke shrugged helplessly. “How did it go?”

“Next time I tell you to drop something, drop it, you hear me?” Luke’s face fell, and because Asch was in a particularly good mood, he decided he’d let his little twin off the hook this time around. “She wants to have breakfast with you and Mother tomorrow morning.”

Luke’s expression did a complete one-eighty as Asch stepped around him to get to the door. “So it went well then?”

“It was fine, no thanks to you.”

“Well tell me what happened!”

“No way. Mind your own business.”

“Asch! You know I’ll just use our twin telepathy on you if you don’t tell me!”

“Luke, how many times do I have to tell you, we aren’t psychic just because we’re twins.”

And as Luke went off on his latest tangent, Asch walked into their room with his phone nestled in his pocket - and Natalia’s number tucked safely away inside.

---

“You know, we could take Luke here one day before you leave, if you’d like.”

“I share everything with Luke. This can be our little secret, okay?”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

#talesoffanfic #tales of the abyss #aschnatalia #asch the bloody #natalia luzu kimlasca lanvaldear #aschxnatalia #asch/natalia #nataliaasch #nataliaxasch #natalia/asch

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sheps-shepherd · 6 years ago

Text

Title: Kainotophobia

Rating: T

Pairing: AschLuke

A/N: Another installment of Soulmate AU that I worked on instead of studying. This was originally going to be part of a much bigger story, but I ended up liking this bit so much that I decided to make this its own thing. And I needed to prove to myself that I’m still capable of writing less than 10k stories

Enjoy!

EDIT: Tumblr likes to eat my formatting on mobile, so here’s the AO3 link for anyone on mobile who would like it. Apologies to everyone who has to scroll through the giant wall of text that Tumblr won’t seem to let me tame.

[See all works in the series here]

The first date went great. And so did the second, and the third, and every single one after.

They weren’t all technically dates. Most of them consisted of meeting up with Asch at the café in the mornings like they had been since they met. But despite the fact that they were pressed for time because of their morning classes and Guy was normally there as a third wheel, they were moments that Luke cherished. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t feel a little bit of a thrill every time Asch sat next to him in the booth, or every time Guy snuck him a wink when Asch paid for his coffee.

For Luke, these mornings were just the little dates squished between the big ones. He liked being able to spend time with Asch, especially now that they were clearly on the same page with the way their relationship was going. It didn’t make Luke quite so anxious anymore - it was hard to be, when the warmth of Asch’s leg against his was one of the most grounding feelings Luke had ever experienced, second only to Guy’s hugs.

But as nice as those mornings were, being able to spend time with Asch unrushed and uninterrupted was even better. They went to the movies, out to cheap diners for dinner, and on walks through Baticul’s botanical gardens. They argued over who would pay for what every time. And on days when Luke felt light enough to walk on water, he’d reach across a table or let his hand wander a little too far from his hip, and Asch would twine their fingers together and Luke would hold on tight.

Those days were Luke’s absolute favorite.

It was a good system: coffee shop in the mornings, some kind of outing normally on the weekend, and quick witty texts in between - a routine that Luke had easily fallen into. He’d had no reason to expect his phone to start ringing so late on a weekday night; he would have missed it entirely had he not decided to zone out of his reading when he did. The upbeat pop-punk ringtone he heard brought a smile to his face, and he reached over to snatch his phone from his nightstand.

“Hey.”

“What are you doing right now?”

“Studying. Why?”

“Do you want to go get some ice cream?”

“Right now? It’s…” He took his phone away from his ear, checking the time that lit up on his screen as he did, “...almost midnight, Asch.”

“Remember that place we went after your Calculus exam? The drive-thru is open all night, I checked.”

“I meant we both have class tomorrow morning.”

“Like you’ll be going to bed at a reasonable hour anyway.”

Luke couldn’t help but smile at the quip. Asch certainly wasn’t wrong - he had already resigned himself to a night filled with studying, which he’d started a couple of hours ago. He’d planned on finishing the lesson he was reading before calling it a night, but surely he deserved a bit of a break. Asch was too studious to stay out ridiculously late on a school night anyway. And it had been a whole day since he’d last seen his boyfriend.

“Okay, fine, I guess you’ve convinced me.”

He could practically hear Asch’s eyeroll. “You didn’t make it very difficult.”

“You’re more persuasive than you seem.” The answering scoff across the line made Luke beam cheekily. “You said the place from after my calc exam? I think I remember where that is. If you haven’t left yet I can come pick you up.”

“I’m outside your apartment.”

Luke blinked. “What?”

“Hurry up.” The line went suspiciously silent, and when Luke checked his phone again, he found his lock screen staring back at him. It was his turn to scoff as he grabbed his jacket from his desk chair, mindlessly stuffing his hand into the pocket to make sure his wallet was still nestled inside.

The rest of the apartment was dark and quiet: signs that Guy had already gone to bed. Luke tiptoed his way over to the door, glancing over his shoulder to watch for the crack of light beneath his best friend’s door as he tugged on his shoes. The darkness stayed constant, and Luke slipped out into the hallway.

Asch’s car was waiting for him right outside his apartment building. Luke could see his boyfriend’s face glowing a soft blue from the light of the radio screen inside.

“What if I had said no?” he asked as he climbed up into the passenger’s seat. Asch smirked over at him as he shifted the car back into drive.

“I’m persuasive, remember?”

Luke rolled his eyes and leaned back to enjoy the ride.

And just like every other date before, it went great.

Asch paid for both of them, ignoring Luke’s petulant squawks of protest - “You paid for our coffee this morning, let me pay this time!” - and making a point to give him a deadpanned look as he passed his credit card through the window. Luke pouted back at him, but he could only stay annoyed for so long when a double scoop cookie dough waffle cone was placed into his hand. He still made a point to mumble one last complaint before tucking in.

It was quiet - most moments with Asch were. But it was a good quiet, sitting in the cozy pine-scented warmth of Asch’s car, parked in the dimly lit lot of the ice cream shop with the soft smacking sounds from their lips passing between them. It was the kind of quiet that made Luke feel lazy, that made him lounge back in his seat and roll his head against his shoulder. He watched Asch in the driver’s seat, nursing his own chocolate cone as he gazed out the window at the sparse traffic on the road. The half-baked glow from the artificial lights above them bounced off of his hair and cast shadows across his face; Luke stared at the shadow of his lashes dancing across his cheek and wondered for the hundredth time how on Auldrant his boyfriend could possibly be real.

His boyfriend. No, he hadn’t gotten sick of that yet.

“You’re pretty smiley for someone who almost wanted to stay in bed.”

Luke blinked. He hadn’t noticed that he’d started smiling so widely or that Asch’s head had turned, too busy mentally waxing poetic about every feature present on his boyfriend’s face.

“I was studying,” he corrected. “And it’s not like you gave me much time to prepare.” Luke propped his elbow up on the console between their seats as his smile turned into a cheeky beam. “Not that I mind. Spontaneity is pretty romantic.”

“Drip ice cream on my seats and you’re walking back to your apartment.” Luke was suddenly aware of something cold and sticky beginning to slide between his fingers. He muttered a curse and brought his cone to his face, frantically trying to lick up the melting treat before it could drip any further. Asch’s eyeroll was as loud and clear now as it had been over the phone. “Napkins in the glove box.”

Luke scrambled into motion, managing to clean up and polish off the last of his cone before any ice cream drips could fall to the seats. Asch probably wouldn’t make good on his threat, but it was too late at night to be dealing with his wrath anyway. He made a show of passing him a few napkins too, and even though the other had made significantly less of a mess, Luke had spent too much time mindfully mapping out the details of his boyfriend’s face not to notice the smudge of chocolate clinging to the corner of his mouth.

He was so mesmerized by the way the dark brown of the chocolate stood out against the smooth paleness of Asch’s cheek that he didn’t even realize he’d started speaking until he stopped. Luke quickly flicked his gaze back up, but not quick enough to beat Asch’s raised eyebrow.

“S-Sorry,” he stammered, because this was the second time tonight that Asch had caught him staring and normally he was stealthier than this. “You just, ah, you’ve got a little…” Luke thumbed at the corner of his own mouth. Asch’s hand went up and mirrored the action, catching the chocolate smear along the pad of his thumb.

“Thanks.” He stuck his tongue out, carelessly licking the remnant away, and while it truly wasn’t the most attractive of moments even for his boyfriend, Luke’s heart still did a frantic flip in his chest at the sight. “Ready to head back?”

“Yeah.” Luke sat back in his seat, pointedly looking out his window and intently staring at the streetlights along the road. As he heard the gear shift creak beside him and felt the car begin to roll out of its parking spot, he reached over to crank up the volume of the radio. The music was a welcome distraction - not to mention a good excuse not to try and make conversation. It was set to a pop station that only ever played when Luke was in the car, and as the latest hit song sounded through the speakers, Luke tried to calm the sudden spike of anxiousness that filled his chest.

Too soon for Luke’s liking, they were pulling back up to his apartment complex. Luke glanced up, his gaze instinctively picking out the dark windows of the floor he and Guy had lived on for almost two years now. He saw Asch reach for the volume dial out of the corner of his eye and turned to look at him as the music softened. The quiet made the anxiety he’d just finished settling return with a jolt to his heart.

“Thanks for coming out with me. I know you were so dedicated to your studying.”

“Yeah, yeah, and what were you doing before you decided you wanted to drag me out at midnight for ice cream?”

Asch’s smile was enough of an answer, and definitely didn’t help the seizing in Luke’s chest at all. Neither did the way Asch reached over to bump his knuckles against his arm, his skin immediately fizzing with warmth at the touch.

“Goodnight, Luke.”

“Can I kiss you?”

Goodnight, Asch, had been what Luke had meant to say. He wasn’t exactly sure where that had gotten mixed up on the way from his brain to his lips, because those were two very, very, very different responses; his mind must have been working overtime to try and get him to have a heart attack, and he was well on his way there. Luke could feel the burn that spread across his cheeks, down his neck, to the very tips of his ears. He hoped that the beams of the streetlights awkwardly bouncing around them was enough cover for Asch not to be able to tell.

It must have been - Luke had faith that if Asch could've seen how red he was, he wouldn't make him wait so long for an answer. The silence of the car was suffocating, the air getting stuck in his throat. Or was that his heart, having jumped there from his chest, frantically beating and begging for Luke to just go, just get out and go inside and holy shit why did I say that, why the hell did I say that-?!

“Can I kiss you back?”

Luke blinked. “Um.” He cleared his throat, trying to shove his heart back into its proper place. “Um, y-yeah. Yes. You can.”

“Then yes, you can.”

Luke had kissed girls before, but it had never felt meaningful. His first kiss - way back when in middle school, with some girl he hardly remembered now - had been an agreement. A hey, you haven't kissed anyone and I haven't kissed anyone so let's kiss each other sort of deal. He'd politely kissed his prom date in high school, but mostly just for show - Tear was his best girl friend anyway, so that was even more reason for it not to count. And it wasn't like Luke had spent a whole lot of time trying to make meaningful romantic connections with people. He'd never really kissed someone.

He'd never kissed a guy.

But as he shifted himself in his seat to better face Asch, and leaned over the console between them to get to him, he knew this was exactly what he wanted, and this - even with the anxiousness butting in the way - was what it was supposed to feel like.

Even so, Luke couldn't help but hesitate after that first brush of their lips. Just that tiny bit of contact set all his nerve-endings alight, and he shuddered at the feeling that shot through him and made his toes curl. Lorelei, he couldn't do this, what kind of idiot can't even kiss someone without acting like a lovesick girl what the hell is wrong with you-

A hand cupped the back of his neck, the rosy warmth of Asch’s fingertips snapping Luke free of his rampant thoughts. It was awkward, making eye contact with his boyfriend when they were in such close proximity to each other, and if his face got any hotter he was sure his head would explode. But the touch was anchoring, a gentle weight that settled at the back of Luke’s mind, right at the eye of the storm swirling through him.

Asch guided him back in with a softness that Luke had never seen him show before. His boyfriend was naturally prickly, rough around still-smooth edges, safe enough to bump into but not without the chance of getting stung. Now, though, there was only tenderness to his touch, warmth to the press of his lips. Luke reached out to grip at the collar of his shirt and was not cut once.

Asch had never kissed a guy either.

When Asch pulled away that time, Luke didn’t let him get very far, drawing him back in with a gentle yet insistent tug to his collar that Asch seemed more than happy to oblige.

It was nice, sitting in the warmth 0f Asch’s car, exchanging slow exploratory kisses in the front seat, getting a feel for what this new development between them felt like. This was the closest the two of them had ever been before, and there was still something separating them - physically, that was, with the center console pressed uncomfortably against the swell of Luke’s belly. Luke found himself entertaining thoughts of what kissing Asch would be like without that niggling sense of pain in the background. With Asch’s arms around him, with his own body pressed against his chest instead of just his hand, with no lurking hesitation and no anxiety peeping out from behind their every move.

Luke didn’t want there to be anything between them anymore.

He wasn’t sure how long they sat there together, but at some point Luke drew back to take a proper breath, and Asch didn’t try and coax him back in. His boyfriend’s hand dropped from his neck to his arm, warm fingers curling around his elbow as their eyes met again. He still felt the burning beneath his cheeks, but Luke could see the question laced in Asch’s knowing gaze and smiled in response.

“I should’ve let you kiss me that night in the apartment,” he said softly. Asch’s mouth quirked at that, and he gave his elbow a light squeeze.

“Worth the wait?”

“Definitely.” Luke sat back properly in his seat, the pressure against his stomach having made its way to the forefront of his mind without the press of Asch’s lips to distract him. Asch’s hand slid down his forearm with the movement to settle loosely around his wrist. “Thank you. For waiting, I mean.”

“Don't thank me for that.”

Luke smiled shyly under the intensity of the other’s gaze, but made no effort to try and pull the words from between them. He was thankful, even if Asch didn't understand why. Thankful for the patience Asch liked to pretend he didn't have, thankful for the considered intent behind every touch, thankful for being able to have him. Asch was the first person to stay in a long while. Luke would spend as long as he had with him trying to thank him for that.

“I should get back upstairs,” Luke mumbled, flicking his gaze over at the green numbers flashing on the radio before going right back to his boyfriend’s green eyes. “It’s pretty late.”

“And you still have studying to do.”

Luke recognized the tease for what it was, but also knew that his sociology textbook would lay forgotten on the edge of his bed until the morning; he was going to spend the next hour lying awake beneath his blankets, replaying the night over and over and over again in his head until he was sure he would never forget it.

“Yeah, because my annoying boyfriend just had to drag me out at midnight on a school night.”

“You got a free ride and free ice cream. Shut up and go finish your homework.”

Luke laughed, tugging his hand free and reaching for the door handle. “Text me when you're home.”

Asch hummed a confirmation, and Luke hesitated.

“Um… Can I…?” He let the question trail off as he saw Asch's eyebrow raise up with it, and offered him a sheepish smile.

Just another thing to get used to, he thought to himself, as he leaned back over to give his boyfriend another goodnight kiss.

Later, as Luke lay in the quiet of his room, staring up at his ceiling with thoughts of the night in his head, he felt his phone vibrate where it rested on his chest. The screen flashed to life when he picked it up, the name he was always waiting to see staring back at him.

Text Message: Asch Received: 1:15 A.M

You don't have to ask. Just so you know.

Luke smiled to himself. Asch knew as well as he did that there was really no other way this could have gone - that Asch wouldn't be the one to try and take that next step, not because he didn't want to, but because he knew Luke would need to. That night in the apartment had plagued Luke’s mind ever since the first date. It was something Luke needed to get over: not letting Asch in when he should have, when he wanted to. Because he'd been scared. He was still scared, as much as he wished he wasn't.

But Asch knew that. Somehow. Luke still wasn't sure how Asch had learned so many of his tells in just a few months - it had taken Guy a solid few years of being around him almost every day to be able to read him like a book the way he could, and yet Asch already seemed to be at the stage of knowing what Luke needed before he knew it himself.

Luke didn't know what that meant, but he did know better than to try thanking Asch again. His boyfriend wasn't quite there yet, but that was okay. Maybe someday he would be. For now, Luke was pretty sure he knew what the next best response would be, and it would mean the same thing.

Text Message: Asch Sent: 1:17 A.M

You don't either.

#talesoffanfic #tales of the abyss #asch the bloody #luke fon fabre #aschluke #aschxluke #asch/luke #lukeasch #lukexasch #luke/asch #soulmate au

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sheps-shepherd · 7 years ago

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Title: Atychiphobia

Rating: T

Pairing: AschLuke

A/N: The completed and official origin story for Soulmate AU!

Normally I post all my works on AO3 and Tumblr, but due to the sheer length of this one I decided against that this time. I wasn’t about to reformat this beast a second time for Tumblr.

That being said, I hope you all enjoy!

#talesoffanfic #tales of the abyss #asch the bloody #luke fon fabre #aschluke #aschxluke #asch/luke #lukeasch #lukexasch #luke/asch #soulmate au

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sheps-shepherd · 7 years ago

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Title: Negotiations

Rating: G

A/N: And y’all thought I forgot about Lorelei Day this year. I didn’t. I just am completely incapable of having things prepared on time. So here’s our annual Lorelei Day Brothers AU update a week and a half late!

I also want to get to a point where I update this series more than just once a year. That’s what I tried to set up here. Enjoy~

[Modern AU/Canon Divergence]

See all works in the series here!

“Ten… Eleven… Twelve!” Luke cheered gleefully as he swung himself from the final rung of the monkey bars. He landed firmly on the metal platform and spun around, waving his arms over his head. “Did you see me, Guy? I went all the way around all by myself!”

Guy grinned and clapped his hands a few times. “Good going, Luke! I think you did it faster than you did last time.”

“You think so? Wait, I’ll do it again, you can time me!”

“All right, all right, give me a second.” Guy took his phone out of his pocket and pulled up a stopwatch. “Get ready, and… Go!” His thumb hit the start button and Luke grabbed the first rung, swinging himself from the platform to gain some momentum to carry him to the next.

“You set yourself up for that one,” Asch pointed out. “He’s going to ask you to time him five more times now.”

“That’s fine. That’ll keep him occupied for a solid- what do you think, two minutes?”

“If we’re lucky.” Asch watched his little brother swing for the first few rungs before turning his attention back to his laptop. A screen filled with time slots and class names stared back at him. While he’d fit a majority of them nicely into one giant block, there was one that stubbornly remained an outlier, and it was frustrating Asch to no end.

He felt Guy shift against his arm. “How’s it going?”

“You’re supposed to be timing him.”

“So, not well?”

Asch sighed and lifted a hand to rub at his temple, leaving the other pressed against the base of his laptop to keep it balanced on his knees. “I think I’m going to have to bite the bullet. I’ve tried everything, but this class just won’t fit into my schedule. It’s too late in the evening.” He ran the same hand through his hair in irritation, letting his elbow come to rest on the back of the bench they were sitting on. “I guess I’m just going to have to take it online.”

“You know, I could pick Luke up from school if you were to have a late class a few times a week. It’s really no big deal.”

Asch shook his head. “That would be three days a week, and you’d have to stay until I got home. That’s too much to ask.”

“I really wouldn’t mind.”

“I know you wouldn’t. But you have your own life to live, Guy. I don’t expect you to spend it at my beck and call.”

“Asch-”

“Guy!” They both glanced up to see Luke once again standing on the platform, pouting petulantly in their direction. “You weren’t watching!”

“Ah, sorry, Luke! Here, go again, I’ll watch extra carefully this time.” Luke puffed his cheeks unhappily, but still wiped his palms off on his pants, readying himself for another go-around. “Okay, get ready, and… Go!” As Luke’s feet left the platform, Asch’s gaze dropped back down to the screen of his laptop, staring at the one box that didn’t fit in his puzzle.

Creating his class schedules was no easier now than it had been the other two times he’d done it. Asch had a strict time limit as far as how early and late his classes could be - late enough in the morning for him to be able to drop Luke off at school, and ending early enough in the afternoon for him to be able to pick him up after. By some stroke of luck, his first semester had worked out almost perfectly for him. He’d had class every day - which couldn’t be avoided, no matter how adamantly he tried - but his first and last classes fit well into the time slot he’d set for himself. His second semester was largely the same, though twice a week he had a class that ran a bit later than he would have liked, but again, it couldn’t be helped. On those days, Luke had to wait for him in the school office, and while it really wasn’t that much of a problem, Luke didn’t like it, and admittedly neither did Asch. He didn’t like the idea of Luke having to sit in the office and wait for him alone, so Asch decided he’d do what he could to avoid that happening again.

Unfortunately, most of the classes he planned on taking in the next semester had only one offered time, and left little room for leeway on how he could arrange his schedule. He didn’t want to take many summer classes if he could avoid it - summer was supposed to mean being able to spend more time with Luke, and less time trying to find someone else to watch him - which left him the option of taking some of his classes online. Which was convenient, but also meant more of his time at home would be taken up, still leaving him with less time to spend with his brother.

Asch had known trying to juggle university and Luke would be challenging, but he also knew that continuing with his education would be better for them in the long run. Still, the end of that run seemed dishearteningly far away, sometimes.

“There’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about,” Guy said, when Luke had gotten about halfway around the monkey bars. “Since, you know, I’m graduated now.”

“What about it?” Asch asked, distracted, his eyes scanning through a list of available online classes for the coming semester. The one he needed was still open; at least he had some luck there.

“About how I want to start watching Luke full-time again, now that I won’t be busy.”

That grabbed Asch’s attention, and he snapped his head around to stare at Guy wide-eyed. Guy didn’t even flinch, keeping his gaze steadily trained on Luke.

“What?”

“Time!” Luke landed back on the platform and spun around. “Time, Guy! What’d I get?!”

“Thirty-two seconds.”

“That’s too slow! Time me again!” Luke didn’t even wait for Guy to call out a start before he was off again. Guy chuckled, but let him have his few-second lead.

Asch, annoyed that Guy had timed his comment so well, reached out and shoved at the blond’s shoulder. “Are you out of your mind?”

“When it comes to you two? Definitely.”

“You aren’t watching Luke again.”

Guy finally looked over at him. “Why not?”

“Because, Guy, you being graduated doesn’t mean you’re going to suddenly have all this free time. You have to start your career at some point.”

“Plenty of people take gap years after they graduate.”

“Yeah, a year, not three.”

Guy shrugged and turned back to Luke, who was finishing up the last few rungs. “I’ll let you pay me, if that’ll make you feel better.”

“You know that’s not what this is about-!”

“Time! What was it on that one, Guy?!”

“Just barely thirty that time. You wanna go once more?”

“Yeah! I’m gonna get under thirty this time, watch!”

Guy chuckled again as he started the stopwatch for the third time, glancing back to Asch. “What makes you think I wouldn’t wanna spend every day with this kid?”

“Guy,” Asch said seriously, “you can’t keep putting your life on hold for us.”

Guy’s smile wavered at Asch’s statement, twisting from happy and carefree to something more somber and understanding. He shook his head. “I’m not leaving you on your own.”

Asch frowned. “You don’t have to take care of me. I’m fine-“

“I know you are,” the blond cut in, waving Asch’s words away with a hand. “I’m just saying: all you’ve ever done is what you think is best for Luke.” His hand dropped onto Asch’s shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. “I think it’s time someone started doing the same for you.”

Asch stared back at him, having no idea what sort of response he could possibly give to that. He’d never thought twice about living his life by Luke; he’d known from the moment his little brother was born that he was going to do whatever it took to take care of him, that he wouldn’t let Luke grow up feeling the way he had. He was going to make good on all those promises he’d made to that tiny baby in his arms on sleepless nights spent by the window.

Asch had never stopped and thought that maybe Guy had a few promises of his own that he wanted to keep.

The sound of a shrill yelp followed by a loud thud drew Asch’s attention back towards the playground. All it took was for him to register a head of bright red hair on the ground before he was all but shoving his laptop down beside him on the bench and taking off, Guy at his heels.

“Let me see,” Asch said, as soon as he was crouched down beside his little brother. Luke had pushed himself up into a sitting position, and now sat on his bottom in the wood chips, his hands palm-side up. There were tears at the corners of his eyes as he held them out towards Asch.

“I-I’m okay, Asch, see?” His hands were scratched from catching his fall, the jagged edges of the wood chips leaving his palms littered with small lines of torn skin. There was only one cut deep enough to draw blood, and thankfully, it was just a thin streak of red running along the base of Luke’s thumb. “It just stings a little, that's all…”

Asch looked over at Guy, who was hovering behind them, ready to step in if he was needed. “I have a water bottle in my bag. Will you grab it for me?” The blond nodded, doubling back to their bench as Asch turned his attention back to his brother. “Just a few scrapes. We’ll clean you up and you’ll be fine.” Luke sniffed and nodded.

There was a tap against his shoulder, and Asch reached up to grab the water bottle that Guy passed over to him. He unscrewed the cap and took one of Luke’s hands in his, pouring some of the water over his palm. Luke winced slightly as it slipped over his cuts.

“There,” Asch murmured, repeating the process over Luke’s other hand. “That should be good enough until we get home. We can clean them properly there. Just be more careful, okay?”

“Okay.” Luke nodded, a small smile crossing his face. “Thanks, Asch.” Asch smiled back at him, lifting a hand to ruffle his brother’s mess of red hair.

The scuffling of wood chips sounded behind him. “Excuse me?” Asch looked over to see a tall blonde-haired woman standing there, clutching a small blue coin purse to her chest. She gave him a kind smile and a little wave as she gained his attention. “Your brother, is he all right?”

Asch blinked in surprise, rising to his feet. He gave a slow nod of his head. “He’s fine.”

She nodded back at him and popped open her purse. “I hope you don’t mind me being nosy. I just thought you might like to borrow this.” She pulled out a small green spray bottle, and held it up for Asch to see. The label across the front of it read To-Go Antiseptic. “Better safe than sorry, right?”

Asch furrowed his brow as he stared skeptically at the woman. She met his gaze easily, even giving him a pointed look of her own.

“Please, I insist.” She shook the bottle lightly between her fingers.

When she didn’t show any signs of backing down or leaving them alone, Asch sighed, and finally stretched out his hand. With a pleased smile, the woman dropped the bottle into his waiting palm, allowing him to draw it back and get a better look at it. It seemed legitimate enough; in fact, it was the same brand of antiseptic that he kept in the medicine cabinet at home.

He glanced over his shoulder at Guy. His friend gave him a shrug back. It’s your call.

“...Luke, let me see your hands again.” Asch turned back to his brother and held his own hand out expectantly. Luke obeyed, holding out his cut palms. “This one’s going to sting a bit more.” His little brother bit his lip, but nodded.

Asch placed his finger on the head of the bottle and pressed down. He gave Luke’s hand a squeeze as the younger boy winced more sharply this time. He was quick about doing his other hand, then pushed Luke’s palms together and blew a cool breath over them to ease the stinging.

“I-It’s okay, I’m okay…” Luke mumbled, pulling his hands free to cradle them against his chest. He had on a brave enough face, though his bottom lip still wobbled slightly. Asch nodded and patted him on the shoulder, shooing him off in Guy’s direction.

While Luke attached himself to Guy’s leg, Asch held the bottle back out to the woman.

“Thank you.”

She accepted it back with a smile. “You’re welcome, Asch.” He blinked, taken aback, and she giggled. “I beg your pardon. It’s just, I believe you’re in my psychology class, up at University of Kimlasca?”

Asch blinked again, this time in realization. They’d never spoken before, but now that she mentioned it, he did recall seeing her walking into the lecture hall practically every day. Their psychology professor was one of the few who required attendance, and did roll call at the start of every class: that must have been how she knew his name.

“Yeah, that’s me. And you’re…” He pondered for a moment, “...Natalia, right?”

Natalia smiled and held out her free hand. “Pleased to meet you.”

“Likewise.” Asch accepted the handshake. “I didn’t know you were from around here.”

“Oh, I’m not, actually. But I come to the neighborhood every so often to look after Tear, while her brother is away.” She glanced down at her side. Asch followed her gaze, and saw a little girl who had to be about Luke’s age peeking out from behind Natalia’s leg. Her bright blue eyes caught sight of him and she squeaked softly, slipping further behind Natalia. The sight made a smile tug at the corner of Asch’s mouth. He wasn’t used to shy kids, Luke had never been anything but a little social butterfly since the moment he learned how to walk.

“Tear?” Luke was peering at them from around Guy’s leg, staring curiously at the girl. He took a step forward. The girl switched to peeking out from Natalia’s other side as she heard the call of her name. “Hey, I remember you! You’re the girl who pushed me down into the mud when we were playing tag!”

Tear’s face went pink. “O-Only because you pulled my hair!”

“I didn’t mean to! I was just trying to tag you! And I said I was sorry!”

“Well, it still hurt!”

Luke puffed his cheeks, but walked over to the girl. Tear shrunk back behind Natalia as he approached. “Look, I am sorry, okay? You wanna go on the swings? I’ll push you.” She stared at him wearily, but apparently the mention of the swings was enough to convince her, and she slowly stepped towards him. Luke beamed at her before running over to the swings. Tear followed him.

Natalia giggled, watching the two of them. “My, what a little gentleman.”

“Yeah, well, he knows better than to be pulling anyone’s hair,” Asch said, glancing over at Guy. He must not have joined him and Luke at the park that day, because he didn’t recall any hair-pulling, and Guy had certainly never mentioned any either. Busted, the blond grinned sheepishly and waved at Asch before slinking back over to their bench.

“Oh, don’t be angry with him. It truly was an accident, I saw the whole thing. Besides, Tear was the one who purposely pushed him down.”

Asch shook his head. “No, it’s okay. They were just being kids.” He crossed his arms. “And anyway, I think it’s good that Tear knows not to let anyone mess with her. Good on her.”

“Yes, I suppose that’s a good point.” Natalia looked over at him, a smile still on her face. “You certainly pay attention in class, don’t you?”

Asch looked back at her, shrugging gently. “Or I just have a younger brother that I expect to do the same.”

“Of course.” Her olive green eyes twinkled at him. “It sounds to me like you take your job as an older brother quite seriously.”

He cleared his throat, glancing back to the swing set. Tear had settled on one of the seats, and a smile was on her face as Luke pushed her up into the air. “You must take being a babysitter seriously too, to carry a to-go bottle of antiseptic around with you.”

“You’d assume correctly. Though I fear sometimes I’m overly paranoid.”

“Trust me, you’re fine.” Asch used to carry a fully stocked first aid kit around in his bag whenever he took Luke anywhere. If that wasn’t overly paranoid, he wasn’t sure what was - Guy still teased him for it.

“Well, I believe it’s true that there’s no such thing as being too careful, so I think I’ll be keeping this with me.” She held up her coin purse and snapped it shut, definitively. “Should you ever need it during class, then, you know where to find me.”

“Thanks, but I’m sure I’ll be fine.”

“Still, the offer stands.” Natalia smiled at him, then blinked and checked her watch. “Ah, I need to get Tear home, her brother will be back soon.” She held her hand out to Asch again. “I’m sure I’ll see you around?”

Asch nodded as he took her hand once more. “Yeah, see you.”

She nodded kindly at him, stepping away to head over to a bench on the other side of the playground, where she had apparently set up a small camp of her own. “Tear! Come on, we have to get going!”

Luke pulled Tear’s swing to a stop, letting her hop off. Asch watched the two of them speak, too far and too quietly for him to hear what they were saying. But Luke had a smile on his face and made a gesture with his hands as he said something that made Tear smile too. The girl nodded at Luke, then turned away and hurried back over to Natalia, taking the pink teddy bear that the blonde woman held out to her.

Natalia lifted a bag and slung the strap over her shoulder. She caught Asch’s gaze and waved at him; he offered a small lift of his hand back. As the two of them began to walk away, a splash of red appeared at the corner of his vision, and he looked over as Luke came running up to him.

“Can we stay a little longer, Asch? Please?”

“Yeah. I still have some work to finish up. We’ll go after that. Just save me the heart attack and stay off the monkey bars, for now.” Luke beamed up at him and nodded before taking off for the playground again, as Asch headed back to the bench where Guy sat with their belongings.

“She seemed nice,” Guy chirped innocently, his gaze trained on Luke as he ran around on the playground equipment. Asch sat back down beside him and reached for his laptop, setting it on his knees. He typed his password in, watching as the screen lit back up to the page of online classes.

“Three times a week,” Asch said. “You’d have to pick him up from school and probably make him something to eat, too, if I’m not home in time. But you leave as soon as I’m back. We won’t be taking up your entire day.” He turned his head. Guy was staring at him, eyes wide with surprise. “And yeah, I’m going to pay you. So deal with it.”

“You’re serious?”

“If you really want to watch Luke again, then that’s the offer. Take it or leave it.”

Guy hummed thoughtfully. “I'll take it. On one condition.”

“That's not taking or leaving it.”

Unsurprisingly, his retort went ignored. “The deal goes for every semester. Changed however you need it to fit your schedule.” Asch narrowed his eyes in annoyance, but Guy only stared back at him, unfazed. “Asch. Just let me help you, okay? Take whatever classes you need to take and get through these next three years. Luke will be fine with me.”

“I know that,” Asch said immediately, because he did. He trusted Luke more with Guy than he did with their own parents.

“So…?” Guy nudged him expectantly. “We have a deal?”

“...Yeah. Deal.”

Guy grinned smugly, continuing to elbow him. Asch batted him away, attention back on his laptop, once again beginning to click through all the tabs he had open to figure out - what would hopefully be - his final schedule.

“He won't need a babysitter forever, you know,” Guy pointed out. “It'll get easier when he's older, and he can look after himself.”

“We’ll see about that.”

“Hey, you turned out alright.”

“Guy!” Luke shouted from the playground. “Guy, will you time me again? I wanna see how fast I can get down all the slides in one go!”

Guy gave him a thumbs up and grabbed his phone again. “He’s reaching, now.”

“Let him wear himself out. Besides, he can’t hurt himself going down a slide.” Asch glanced up as Guy called out the start of the time, and Luke began racing through the equipment to get to the first slide. “Well, he’s less likely to, at least.”

“Knowing Luke, I wouldn’t be surprised if he still found a way.” Guy rested his phone on his knee as he leaned back against the bench, crossing his arms over his chest. “So, seriously, that woman who was here. She’s a friend from school?”

“I wouldn’t say friend. I don’t know anything about her besides her name.”

“She mentioned you guys have class together? That’s nice.” Asch gave the blond beside him a look, and got a cheeky grin in response. “What? All I’m saying is it’s nice to have a friend or two in a class. You never know when you’ll need a save.”

“Yeah, if I ever get a paper cut, I’ll know who to find.”

Guy chuckled. “You’re impossible.”

Asch only shrugged, falling silent as he focused in on what he was doing. His schedule looked less aesthetically pleasing now: small groups of classes that fit in a nice block flanked by the separate squares of the one that didn’t. But it was going to work, and that was all he cared about.

He stared at his outlying class thoughtfully, a block labeled Developmental Psychology.

He had a feeling he’d be seeing more of that woman after all.

#talesoffanfic #tales of the abyss #brothers au #luke fon fabre #guy cecil #gailardia galan gardios #aschluke #aschguyluke #asch the bloody

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sheps-shepherd · 7 years ago

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@aiko-namina

SURPRISE BITCH I WAS YOUR SECRET SANTA AND YOU DIDN’T EVEN KNOW WOOOOOOOOOOW

You asked for a fluffy epilogue SorMik fic. I give you kinda sorta not that.

I think you’ll appreciate what I ended up doing. I really hope you like it! Merry Christmas!

Also this is a song fic! Kinda! So when you see the ~:~ symbol, click on the link and listen to the song as you read! There are two songs and I very intricately placed them to fit in the story so don’t go past the second symbol until you’re done with the first song! I’ll know if you do and I’ll be offended so don’t.

Kay enjoyyyyyyyy!

The feeling of the room hit Mikleo before he’d even opened his eyes. It felt hot and stuffy, like a blast of dragon breath had hit him square in the face. But instead of a dragon, it was an array of colorful lights, swirling and flashing from the ceiling onto the floor below. He was standing in the shadow of some kind of overhang, protecting him from the beams of blue and pink, but the other patrons of the room weren’t so lucky. Yet they didn’t seem to mind, and moved around in sweaty clusters of people with smiles on their faces. Mikleo didn’t get what there was to be happy about in a room that felt so claustrophobic and disgustingly warm with all its occupants and brightness.

But there was some part of him that did. The aura of the room made Mikleo feel something he hadn’t felt in a long time – so long that he no longer knew the name of that feeling. Just that it made him feel a little more… alive.

“Why did you take us here?”

“I didn’t. I just went for it, and this is where we ended up.”

“Were you trying to go somewhere else?”

“No place specifically other than here.”

It was hard to hear over the music playing somewhere else in the room. When was the last time Mikleo had heard music? Longer than the last time he’d felt anything besides the warped content he’d been living in. But he didn’t recall ever hearing music that sounded quite like this: so powerful and upbeat. Not that he could really recall what music normally sounded like to him.

A group of people on the rainbow-lit floor in front of them suddenly moved away, giving Mikleo a much better view of the rest of the room. It was largely the same as the small piece of it he’d been seeing before, yet his attention was drawn to a group near the middle. At first glance, there was nothing special about them – just another sweaty group of too-happy people. But that feeling was tugging at Mikleo’s chest, and as he watched, a familiar head of snowy white hair bobbed into view.

He inhaled sharply.

“That’s–?”

“Yeah.”

Mikleo dared to glance over. Sorey was looking away from him, presumably at the same group Mikleo had just been watching, and no doubt seeing the same thing. There was a furrow nestled between his eyebrows and a stiffness to his shoulders that portrayed his discomfort.

“I don’t see you, though.”

“I’m in there somewhere.”

“How do you know?”

“I’m never far from you.”

The world proved Sorey right: like clockwork, a just-as-familiar face bounced into Mikleo’s view, a smile so brightly placed upon his face it would put the sun itself to shame.

It made Mikleo feel sick. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Sorey’s stance shift.

Sorey looked perfect under the blinking lights, like he was meant to be there. His brown hair was as messy as ever, his bangs slightly curled from the sweat collected along his brow. It looked like he was supposed to be wearing a suit of sorts, but lacked a jacket to match his pants. His dark blue dress shirt was unbuttoned at his throat, and his black bowtie hung loosely around his collar. And his vibrant green eyes were like sparkles, shining brighter than any light in the room, matching his grin as he moved to the beat of the music alongside…. Rose. That was Rose, dancing next to him, her long black dress swishing around her ankles as she matched Sorey step for step.

It was good to see her again. It was good to see her and Sorey together again. Mikleo hadn’t seen that in a long, long time.

~:~

As the thrill of the song faded away, Sorey and Rose high-fived and laughed through a bout of heavy panting. They were swallowed up by bodies as the other people in their group moved around, hiding them from Mikleo’s sight. As they all made a new cluster or walked away, a new song started up, this one much softer and slower. And Mikleo suddenly saw himself standing awkwardly on the floor alone, looking incredibly out of place in his crisp white suit with his turquoise bowtie. He watched himself bite his lip and gaze around almost hopelessly, before he turned to walk back across the room.

“Mikleo!” Sorey appeared again, pushing his way past a few groups of dancing people to get to the open space where Mikleo was. “Mikleo, hey, wait!” His hand closed around Mikleo’s wrist, making him pause in his steps and turn to look at him.

Rejuvenation, Mikleo decided, staring hard at the spot where Sorey’s fingers touched him – the other him. That’s what this feeling is. Beside him, Sorey didn’t move. Mikleo didn’t think he was even breathing.

On the floor, Sorey seemed to be fumbling for something else to say. Mikleo could see his throat working as he tried to wrestle words out of his mouth. The other Mikleo waited patiently for him to finally speak. “Will you…. Will you dance with me?”

“Why don’t you ask Rose to dance with you?” Mikleo replied, with absolutely no hesitation, his words like a whip that took no prisoners. Sorey winced a bit. “She is your date, after all.”

“Mikleo….” Sorey looked ashamed for a moment, but quickly shook his head in protest. “This is stupid. It’s our senior prom. We should have come together, and instead we’re fighting. I’m sick of fighting.”

Mikleo looked away. “You seem to be having a perfectly nice time anyway.” It seemed like he was trying to tug his hand free, but Sorey held onto him, twisting their fingers together defiantly.

“Not as much as I would be if I knew I was here with you.” Sorey’s shoulders dropped sadly. “I know I’m a bad boyfriend and I didn’t handle what happened very well. And I’m sorry. But…. Give me a chance to be better?”

For a moment, as Mikleo watched himself close his eyes and take a long, deep breath, he thought for sure he’d say something he didn’t want to hear. He hadn’t wanted to come here to see himself and the love of his life at a bump in the road – he lived eternally in such a bump. He stared at himself so hard he could feel a strain behind his eyes, willing himself to make the right decision.

But he was pretty sure that had nothing to do with the other him’s eventual response.

“You’re not a bad boyfriend,” Mikleo said, so softly that he could barely be heard even beneath the already-quiet music. He looked back up at Sorey, who was giving him a grateful smile. “I didn’t handle what happened well, either. I don’t blame you for anything that happened. I started it all, anyway.”

“That’s not true.”

“Yes, it is.” Mikleo took Sorey’s other hand in his, holding them between their bodies as they stared at each other, Sorey the classic full-head taller. “I’m sorry I didn’t trust you with Alisha.”

“I’m sorry I gave you a reason not to trust me.”

“You didn’t.” Mikleo brought their joined hands to his chest. “I…. I was just jealous. Of you and her. And I took it out on you.” Sorey grinned, and Mikleo’s cheeks went pink, bleeding through the tint of the lights. “Yeah, yeah, go ahead and poke fun. I deserve it.”

“Hey, did I say anything? Besides, what I think you deserve….” He took their joined hands back, guiding Mikleo’s to lay on his shoulders before resting his own over his hips, “….is a proper dance at your senior prom with your awful boyfriend.”

“I told you, you’re not awful.”

“Mediocre, then.”

Mikleo giggled and shook his head. He curled his arms further around Sorey’s neck, and Sorey curled his arms further around the small of his back, bringing their bodies closer together. Sorey rested his forehead against Mikleo’s.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“We should go.”

Mikleo blinked out of his trance and looked back over at his Sorey, who had stood silent beside him until now. “What?”

“If I’d known it was going to send me to a place like this, I wouldn’t have brought you with me.” Sorey’s already-crossed arms tightened across his chest. “You didn’t need to see something like this.”

“Why’s that?”

Sorey didn’t answer. Mikleo didn’t need him to.

“Let’s go.”

Rejuvenation.

“Dance with me.”

For the first time since they’d arrived, Sorey looked over at him. His red eyes flashed even in the dim lighting of the overhang.

“What?”

Mikleo pointed to where their other selves held each other and swayed, eyes closed and completely in love.

“Dance with me.”

“Don’t be stupid. We have to go.”

“I want to dance with you.”

“We’re going.”

“No.”

“Mikleo–!”

Mikleo reached out and grabbed Sorey by the front of his cloak, gripping the black fabric tightly in his hands. He pulled on him, hard, forcing Sorey to take a stumbling step closer to him. Their gazes met in a stalemate: Mikleo’s full of determination and Sorey’s of annoyance.

Mikleo knew full well that he really had no control over whether or not Sorey took them back – it was his power, not Mikleo’s – but the fact that he hadn’t done so already gave Mikleo some kind of hope.

He brought his hands up and wrapped his arms around Sorey’s neck, glancing sidelong at his other self for a reference. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d held Sorey so innocently, without the promise of lips on skin or hands groping flesh. Mikleo was jealous – jealous of the other him who got to hold Sorey whenever he pleased. It made him feel guilty: jealousy was a feeling he still knew quite well.

With a start, Mikleo realized the song had ended, and their other selves had ceased their dancing as a voice boomed through the room. “All right, Glenwood High! It is now officially time to announce this year’s prom king and queen!” Cheers and applause of excitement rang out, and with a defeated sigh, Mikleo stepped back.

Only to be caught around his waist and prevented from moving any further. Mikleo looked up in surprise, but Sorey’s face was the blank slate it normally was, revealing none of what he was thinking. His red stare bore into Mikleo, so intense it sent a shiver down his spine.

“The ballots have been counted! I am pleased to introduce your king and queen…”

With the arm around him, Sorey pulled Mikleo close again, until they were chest-to-chest. His other hand came to rest on the middle of Mikleo’s back.

Mikleo had forgotten what it felt like to be held so tenderly by the one he loved.

“There isn’t any music playing now.”

“Do you care?”

“No.”

Mikleo laid his head on his shoulder, cheek pressed to the curve of Sorey’s collarbone, his hands coming to rest back on his chest.

“….Sorey Shepherd and Alisha Diphda!”

~:~

More cheers. More applause. Mikleo could still see their other selves, and watched them – watched Sorey’s bright green eyes go wide as he double-taked between the Mikleo in his arms and something Mikleo couldn’t see. The other Mikleo laughed and shoved at him, yelling over the roar of the crowd to go. Sorey grinned and made to bolt away, but Mikleo was quick to grab his wrist.

“Wait! Fix your bowtie!”

Sorey looked down at himself, quickly bringing his hands up to hastily attempt to redo the buttons on his shirt. Mikleo’s hands went to his throat and fumbled with his bowtie. Through giddy laughter and knocking fingers, they managed to get Sorey looking presentable. Only then did Mikleo allow him to run off to the other end of the room, and out of sight.

“You’re stupid, you know that?” Sorey’s voice came from over his shoulder, his voice practically a whisper to Mikleo’s ears with all the background noise. He shrugged in response.

“So are you.”

“I know.”

“This isn’t dancing.”

“It’s what you wanted.”

“I know.”

Mikleo closed his eyes. Everything else around him became white noise. Nothing mattered, nothing but the way Sorey’s cloak felt against his cheek or the way Sorey’s arms felt around his back or the way Sorey’s chin felt pressed to his hair. For a moment, Mikleo could almost trick himself into believing that he and his Sorey were no different than the him and Sorey they’d come to see. That there was no game, no power, no other home to return to, and he would pull back and look up and Sorey would be smiling at him with that sun-shaming smile of his that made his bright green eyes sparkle–

Mikleo opened his eyes. Their other selves were back in their spot on the dance floor, Sorey with a big and gaudy, red-and-silver glitter-covered crown now on his head. His black jacket that had been missing before was now on his shoulders, starkly contrasting Mikleo’s white sleeves. The music was upbeat and playful again, and they shook each other around as they danced, hands interlocked, wide grins on their faces.

And suddenly, Sorey tugged his hands free, brought them up to cup Mikleo’s cheeks, and pulled him into a kiss. Mikleo’s fingers caught the fabric of his jacket, holding onto him as he rose up onto his toes to better return the kiss without disturbing the crown atop Sorey’s head. Watching them, Mikleo couldn’t tell when their kiss turned from a real kiss to them just smiling against each other’s lips like complete and utter dorks.

Rose appeared from somewhere Mikleo couldn’t see, and shoved her way between the two of them, wrapping an arm around each of their necks and dragging them into a hug. Then Alisha was there at Sorey’s side, grabbing the rim of his crown when it threatened to topple off following Rose’s assault. She had a matching tiara nestled in her blonde curls, just as gaudy and glittery as Sorey’s. When Rose released them, she stepped up to Mikleo, wringing her hands together at her chest, and said something that was lost among the music. But whatever it was that she said made Mikleo smile, and he pulled her into a hug of his own. Behind them, Sorey and Rose exchanged relieved grins.

Sorey reached up and took the crown off his head, holding it high in the air as he shouted, “To senior year!” Whooping repeats of the cheer echoed through the room, and Sorey laughed. The crown went back on his head, and he picked Mikleo up, bent down and wrapped his arms around his waist and actually picked him up. And Mikleo was so happy he didn’t even scold him for it. He just laughed and squished Sorey’s cheeks between his palms and shook his head adoringly. He said something that made Sorey’s grin widen all the more, and he dipped his head down just as Sorey was craning his up–

A cloud of purple suddenly filled Mikleo’s vision. He blinked, lifting his head from Sorey’s shoulder as he watched it dissipate before his eyes. Gone were the bright blinking lights, the blues and pinks and yellows all replaced with shadowed corners and dingy stone walls. The loud music abruptly stopped, replaced with a bone-chilling silence. And the people – there was no longer a single person in sight. No groups of dancing friends, no Rose, no Alisha, no other him, and no other Sorey.

Nothing but the ubiquitous scene of a ruin wall that had made up his life for so long now that he’d forgotten what it felt like to see something new.

Mikleo stepped out of the embrace and looked up at Sorey, his mouth hanging open. But before he could utter any words of protest, Sorey was there again, taking him by the chin and pulling him back in and pressing their lips together.

It was soft and sweet, not hungry and desperate like the kisses Sorey usually gave him. It made Mikleo gasp in surprise, and Sorey held him almost painfully tightly, and Mikleo didn’t pull away from him. He didn’t even mind the harshness of his grip, because it had been ages since Sorey had kissed him so chastely, just because he loved him, and not because he wanted anything else along with it.

He reached upwards with the intent to loop his arms around his neck, but Sorey broke the kiss before he could. Mikleo looked up again, into his love’s glowing red eyes.

“Sorey–”

“Don’t ever ask to come with me again.”

Mikleo reeled back, and this time, Sorey let him. He ignored the shocked expression on Mikleo’s face, instead turning around to slink off down one of the ruins’ many hallways, to disappear somewhere and stay there until he felt like coming back out.

He stopped at the threshold of the hallway. His black cloak helped him blend into the darkness of the room, even its gold accents faint. But his eyes were bright as he looked over his shoulder, cutting through the dimness and staring right through him.

Mikleo couldn’t help but think about how the brightness in his Sorey’s eyes was so different than the brightness in the eyes of the other Sorey. So different from the way his Sorey’s used to be.

“It’s easier this way. If you just stay here.”

“Why do you go?” Mikleo asked, his hands balled into fists at his sides. “Why do you go if you don’t care?”

Sorey didn’t answer him. He turned back around and disappeared into the darkness of the hallway.

Mikleo brought a hand to his mouth and touched his fingertips to his still-burning lips.

He had no idea how long it would be before he saw Sorey again.

The bright multi-colored strobe lights had been turned off in favor of turning on the brighter overhead lights of the gymnasium. Large sheets of construction paper and piles of streamers littered the floor, as did the rest of the student council staff as they flittered about, removing decorations.

Mikleo was taking down the last of the balloons taped along the bleachers when that odd feeling dripped down his spine again. He pulled off the last red balloon and turned to glance over his shoulder, to the other side of the gym. Specifically to the shadow of one of the basketball hoops, the only one folded down from the ceiling that had been used to help suspend strings of paper stars. Mikleo wasn’t sure what it was, but the need to keep checking that particular spot for something kept niggling its way through his head. And every time he looked, there was nothing. Nothing but a crumbled napkin someone had missed when clearing the nearby tables.

He was probably just tired. And upset that that napkin was just sitting there. He should just go pick it up.

“Mikleo?”

A hand touched his elbow, and he looked over. Sorey was still wearing his ridiculous prom king crown, and had once again shed his jacket and tugged off his bowtie. Both were bunched up and stuffed under his arm, and Mikleo half-heartedly noted he’d have to stop by Sorey’s house at some point before his rented suit was due back to spiff both items back up.

Sorey smiled at him, and Mikleo forgot to make a sarcastic comment about his lack of clothing etiquette.

“Hey, Rose offered to take our picture outside, while the building’s still all lit up. Since, you know, we didn’t exactly get to the photographer earlier. Her new phone is probably the next best thing we can get.”

“You’re drenched in sweat and already half-destroyed your suit. You really want your picture taken right now?”

“Do I really want a picture with my boyfriend to commemorate our senior prom? Yeah, I really do.”

Mikleo rolled his eyes, but felt his lips twitch into a smile. “Fine. We did take a picture at your last soccer game anyway, and I guarantee you can’t smell worse than that.”

“At least I’m in a suit this time.”

They both laughed. Sorey took the balloon from him and bopped it towards the middle of the gym floor for someone else to take care of. Mikleo watched it float to the ground before looking back up at Sorey, surprised to find him staring rather intently across the gymnasium. He followed his gaze, but couldn’t figure out what he was staring at.

“Sorey?”

“Who’s in charge of raising the basketball hoop back up?”

Mikleo blinked. “Alisha. She’s the student council president, she should have the key.”

“She’s outside with Rose. I bet she forgot. C’mon, we can have a photo shoot while we wait for her to finish up.”

Sorey reached down and took his hand, lacing their fingers together as he began to lead the way out of the gymnasium. Mikleo went willingly, falling into step beside his boyfriend without even needing to think about it.

That feeling slipped back down his spine, though, and Mikleo cast one last glance at the shadow of the basketball hoop before they crossed through the doorway of the gym and it vanished from his sight.

“Everything okay?”

“I love you,” Mikleo said instead of answering. Sorey beamed at him, and as he lifted their joined hands and pressed a soft kiss to the back of Mikleo’s, he couldn’t help but think that Sorey looked like a true king, ridiculous crown and all.

“I love you, too.”

Mikleo’s heart fluttered. Being with Sorey always made him feel so wonderfully alive.

#talesoffanfic #tales of zestiria #sormik #soremiku #suremiku #sorey #mikleo #merry christmas babe i hope you like it

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