#taking red lobster on faith
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#11 - She's Come to See a Man About a Dog
No Red Lobster will serve the dreadlocked man, not even after he's had a nice bath in the aquariums at the Forum shops, been stuffed into a new set of sweatpants and a clean tee shirt, had a nice day-long nap -- not even when accompanied by his clergyman.
 There's something disconcerting about the pointed teeth. 
For that matter, there's something disconcerting about the clergyman. People are uncomfortable when they can't readily identify someone's race. Sporkman can pass for Melanesian in poor lighting and well-traveled company. But The Missionary keeps strobing back and forth from unusually robust and dark Southeast Asian to light-skinned American Black. It causes heebee-jeebies in a certain kind of person. So both men are defaulted to black, and weird, and undesirable. It's metaphysically easier that way. 
Here's the timeline:
Wee hours of the morning – The Missionary retrieves Sporkman from a traumatized private security guard named Joseph
The rest of the morning – Finding clothing that Sporkman will consent to wear. Napping.
Noonish to mid-afternoon – Taking Sporkman out to eat, failing at this, bringing him back to the Mission and begging him to stay put
Mid-afternoon to early evening – Staring at the Mission’s bank balance. Praying.
Early evening to just before sunset – Going out to pick up Red Lobster for everyone after acquainting Big Hat with Mission rules and the certain consequences of breaking them
Sunset – Pulling his car into the alley/driveway of the Mission just as the classic Cadillac of an important donor miraculously finds an unoccupied length of curb directly in front of The Christ Died For You Thrift Shop and Tobacco Emporium.
She joins him at the Mission’s tiki-covered back door. His hands are full of Red Lobster takeout, with breads and salads and chicken and rice pilaf and oversteamed vegetables, plus all the seafood he could reasonably afford for -- he needs a name. The Missionary does not believe Jesus would persist in calling someone Sporkman, even in His own mind. 
The Lady opens the door for him.
Sporkman is standing right behind it, at attention, resolutely staying put to the minimum possible degree. Sporkman is occasionally stymied by the complex machinery of knobs and hinges.
"Hello, Triton," The Lady says to Sporkman
Okaaaaay.
Problem solved, then.
Triton smiles broadly at The Lady, showing all his remaining pointy teeth, and executes a low bow. She winks at him in return.
Big Hat is bedded down with blankets and a length of foam upholstery cushion for a mattress. He accepts his paper bag of Red Lobster food with sullen dignity. His perfectly good dog haunch is locked up in the preacher's extra-large freezer until the preacher can figure out how to dispose of such a thing. He would not listen to any of Big Hat's logical explanations of how a fresh cut of meat might be beneficially disposed. 
Big Hat removes the plastic lid from the styrofoam container of broccoli and prods it with a calloused finger. He sniffs at it. He carefully replaces the plastic lid and slides the styrofoam container toward the ring of styrofoam containers that Triton has arrayed in a semicircle on the floor about him.
"You two know each other?" The Missionary asks The Lady. He appears to be taking inventory of the spork supply that came with the food, wholly absorbed in harvesting the napkins and moist towelettes, then storing the utensils in the former hostess station that now serves as his pulpit lectern.
"That is the least convincing casual question you've ever asked me," she answers.
He shrugs. Raises one eyebrow. Unpacks the food with all the solemnity of ritual. "Professional acquaintance?" He asks.
She folds her arms and snorts at him. 
He reaches the bottom of the last take-out bag and retrieves the receipt, reads it, winces, and carefully folds it so he can tuck it into his wallet. 
She keeps her arms folded, but her posture shifts into something less -- he searches for the right word -- performative, maybe? Something more real. More human. "You have your reasons for take-out Red Lobster, and they are none of my business," she tells him. Her voice is pitched low. These words are for him, not the rest of the party. "Some things, I just have to take on faith."
He nods, once. 
"But do you need something extra this month?" She asks.
"We're okay," he says, too quickly. Then he straightens up and meets her eye. "We are," he says again, more sincerely. His slow, stolid, serene, stubborn silence restores some balance to the power in the room. 
Besides, she never really tells him what to do. Her monthly contribution comes with no strings. Sometimes, it comes with advice, which he is free to take or ignore.
He always takes it, because it is always good advice.
“What do you do?” The Missionary finally asks, as if this had never occurred to him. In truth, it has. But the sorts of things ladies might do to become one of this Lady’s crowd are things that may lead down roads one must tread very, very carefully. Confessions, if they need to come, generally come at a time and place of their own choosing. 
He expects a charming deflection.
“I’m a retired schoolteacher,” she says, simply. Then she returns the incredulous looks she is receiving with a slightly mocking twist of her lips. “I know,” she adds, with rising inflection, “It’s always so disappointing. I hate to disappoint people. You have so much fun with the speculation.”
The unexpected answer is so pat and skillfully given that the Missionary knows it is, in its own way, the charming deflection he expected.
She scowls at him. "Isn't it against some sort of evangelical code to turn down money?" 
This time he snorts at her. But all he says is, "Are you hungry?"
"No, thank you," she answers, "You go ahead, though. I just dropped in to borrow a cup of dismembered coyote ass. Do you have any you can spare?"
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honey-crypt · 5 months ago
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★ sdv elliott x plus-sized!farmer thoughts ★
★ first off, elliott loves bigger people. he finds plus-sized people to be works of art, an imprint of the renaissance in the modern world
★ he grew up in a somewhat look-centric household and community, people who forced others to uphold insane beauty standards, so he works on dismantling those beliefs after moving to stardew valley
★ elliott was still in the midst of getting the bare bones on his novel when you, the farmer, show up at his door with a lobster in hand
★ elliott wasn’t sure if love at first sight was a thing but once he locked eyes with you, he confirmed it to be real
★ he can’t get enough of how soft but strong your arms looked, how plump your belly was with your muddy overalls, the way your dips and curves told such a rich story
> mentally, he claimed you as his muse and later would become like a lost puppy boy, taking upon any and all opportunities to see you
★ elliott loves when you invite him to your farm and he’s able to work on his novel while you do your farm work; especially in the hotter seasons, the sight of you all sweaty with your work clothes clinging to your skin made his face match his hair, red
★ meanwhile, you’re kinda confused as to why this human equivalent to the beauty of shining rubies was so up in your space. of course, you enjoyed his company, he was a great friend of yours! but often times, you found yourself on guard with any comments that had a hint of romance to them
★ elliott didn’t realize how uncomfortable his flattery made you until he saw you physically flinch after he called you “radiant as the sun gods themself”
> you ended up telling him that you weren’t used to such kindness and admiration towards your body, having grown up in a very fat-negative society
★ of course, baby boy was immediately reassuring that his compliments and flattery towards you were always genuine; he ends up in a state where he’s just blabbering and rapidly motioning about how wonderful he thinks you are
★ by now, you’re melting in your seat, not sure how to proceed. yet, you take a leap of faith and peck him on the cheek
★ that cheek peck soon turned to him giving you one, then you two kissing, and finally you two making out and nearly breaking a nearby flower pot
★ with you as his romantic partner, elliott is on top of the world and is able to finish his romance novel camelia station a few weeks later
★ he dedicates the book to you and a few other important figures in his life, your dedication being something along “my darling muse, your presence was the key to this novel’s completion”
★ with camelia station finished and on the shelves, elliott starts on his second book, a romance between a plus-sized lighthouse keeper and a merman that may or may not bear a resemblance to the author in question
★ he’s still working on his second novel by the time you two tie the knot, thrilled that he was going to be living with you as your husband
★ elliott was always there for you when people were snarky about your size, ready to defend your honor like the gentleman he is
★ you two have been married for about a year when elliott finishes his latest novel, keeper of the glistening sea, and you’re finally able to read it!!! you’re full of awe and joy while reading through it, catching the similarities between you and the protagonist
★ to elliott, you’re his muse, his living aphrodite, with a body like the sculptures dedicated in her own
★ to you, elliott’s your gentleman, your right hand man and your light in the darkest of hours
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shipposttt · 1 year ago
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The ship of the day: Victuuri
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Names: Viktor Nikiforov and Yuuri Katsuki
Ship Name(s): Victuuri
Original Content: Yuri!!! On Ice series (2016)
Ship info:
Yuri!!! On Ice is a series which follows pro figure skater Yuuri Katsuki, who is on the verge of retirement, on his route back to pro skating and recovering his competitive abilities.
Yuuri K returns to his hometown after a string of losses within competitions, going back to his family’s hot springs. World renowned skater Viktor Nikiforov, Yuuri’s long time motivation for skating and childhood obsession (?), crush (?), wins his fifth consecutive World Championship, inspiring Yuuri to practice the routine he used to win. Unbeknownst to him, his performance is recorded and uploaded to the internet, going viral, and causing Viktor to travel to Japan to request to be Yuuri’s coach for the next Grand Prix series- baring in mind said conversation takes place in the hot spring, with Viktor as naked as the day he was born and Yuuri as red as a lobster. Yuuri accepts and so starts the series of Viktor training Yuuri, growing closer as he realises its Yuuri’s emotions, not his physical abilities which make him struggle in competitions.
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Between this, Yuuri and Viktor grow close and, within episode 5 (following his win at the Japan Figure Skating Championships) Yuri announces his Grand Prix programme theme to be ‘Love’, inspired by his feelings for Viktor. Despite feeling the pressure of expectations following his good performance in the first Grand Prix assignment, Viktor is able to help reinstall Yuuri’s confidence as he promises to have faith in him and to not worry about his own reputation. During his skate, Yuuri changes his final jump to Viktor’s signature move, a quadruple flip. This surprises Viktor, who runs to Yuuri as he leaves the rink, tackling him onto the ice and kissing him in front of everyone ‘because it’s the only way to surprise him back’. Later on, at another competition destination, Yuuri gifts Viktor a gold ring which matches his own- later on, Viktor refers to them as engagement rings, though its unclear whether this was in jest or meant seriously. He also states that he and Yuuri would get married when Yuuri won gold at the Grand Prix Final.  After this, they invite the other skaters to a dinner, where it’s revealed that during the previous year’s GPF banquet Yuri got drunk and started a dance off, also begging Viktor to come to his family hot spring and be his coach- though Yuuri had no memory of this event.
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In the end, Yuuri and Viktor agree that whilst Viktor would return to skating for the next season, he would remain as Yuuri’s coach. With hat, they perform a pair ice dance edition of Viktor’s routine in the GPF exhibition event. Following the event, Yuuri moves to Russia to train alongside Viktor, finishing off the series there.
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Type of Ship: Queer
The fandom at large regards the kiss, rings, and marriage comments as confirming their relationship canonically and I am inclined to agree, kissing someone is a bit extreme as being purely for a surprise without any romantic involvement- especially considering Viktor is representing Russia, which is known for its anti-lgbt+ views. Hence, I believe this relation is canon queer due to the actions of the pair throughout the series, which could be argued to not be platonic from the get-go, as Yuuri ran to see Viktor in a hot bath, which are traditionally enjoyed naked.
Thanks for reading!
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Admin🦇
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allyaloe · 2 years ago
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Pick a Starry Sky - Guidance Pick A Pic
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Select a pic below for general guidance you need to hear right now! These are collective messages that will not resonate for everyone but hopefully you get some of the clarity you need.
Thank you so much for checking out my readings! ❤️
Group 1
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I feel like this group is more focused on career opportunities. Taurus placements could be relevant here, especially risings. The name Katarina could resonate for some of you or the letters/initials JS. You may be gunning for a promotion or other progress within the company or firm you work for if you work in an office. Scorpio suns could also be relevant. For others, I see you taking a backseat from work as the responsibilities pile up. You may want a break, perhaps a union could be significant too. I’m seeing you stepping away from emails and computer and really resting and recuperating during the holiday season.
For those of you in relationships, you could be getting newly engaged and married. I’m seeing the combo of Taurus again along with Pisces. For the person this resonates for, this could be unconventional or perhaps your family does not approve of the relationship and is more conservative. Feel the fear and persevere. Your home is in each other, not in any bigoted beliefs or misconceptions. This person could be of a different religion or faith to you, maybe Buddhist when your family is Christian or Catholic. It’s like that episode of The Simpsons where they want Lisa to celebrate Christmas even though she’s Buddhist, I’m getting. This is true love, the romance of a lifetime. Don’t let anyone deter you from it. For some people, your family will become more accepting over time. I understand this is triggering, but I have to tell you this.
I’m also getting someone could be a Libra sun, moon, rising, letter H. They might want a reconciliation or trying to contact you through friends and Instagram DMs. For who this resonates for, do you really want them back in your life? It is ultimately up to you. Someone could be listening to Can You Feel the Love Tonight by Elton John. That’s really random, but it brings you comfort. Take what you need, let go of what you don’t!
Group 2
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There is a powerful and creative energy around this group, Virgo and Leo, with Capricorn placements. I feel like many in this group are working on new projects with a focus on community. There are some very artistic people here, whether it’s music, painting, multimedia skills. Some of you have big families and love the holidays. The name Seth came through, that could be significant to someone here. Someone’s favourite animal and symbol is an elephant.
Someone is a brilliant mind but they may not believe in themselves enough; a significant number could be 888/222. Someone may be a Sagittarius rising with a critical streak towards self and others. I feel like there are some big hearts in this group as well. You may enjoy gift giving or wining and dining. I saw a brown classic teddy bear and a big red lobster in a restaurant so that could resonate for someone. A Christmas date, perhaps? I feel like you could dating someone very charming. I saw someone pouring and smirking at someone else over a glass of red wine. They were Black with a short haircut and wearing red, in particular a nice shirt or jacket. This is NSFW, so minors don’t interact: if you are planning on sexual relations with this person if this resonates, please wear protection, especially if you are not planning on conceiving anytime soon. I feel like a couple here is very passionate when it comes to that sort of thing.
Overall, I’m getting to enjoy the holiday season, no matter what you celebrate, and pouring your focus, passion and creativity into the things - and people! - you love. Don’t stress and worry so much and make sure to unwind while still planning your goals.
Group 3
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I need this group to know if you have experienced any type of loss this year, it is not your fault and you are being loved and watched over. This may be a significant message for Libra and Aries placements. I am aware this is sensitive so please read the next half with caution.
For those who have lost family, you may already feel a strong presence in the home, perhaps in a favourite chair they used to frequent, or when a song plays out of nowhere that they used to love. That is a sign that they are thinking about you and are with always. Someone here with Scorpio placements needs to know that if you believe in past lives, they will be with you in your next one, in a different role. For example, if they were a parent to you in this lifetime, they were be your child or pet in the next one to come.
I really feel you’re being guided to grieve for as long as you need to. The name Henry could be significant to someone. Watching Ghibli or Disney with another loved one over the holiday period could bring closure or comfort. I mean no disrespect, so if this doesn’t resonate, feel free to pick another group.
This is another sensitive topic spirit wants me to speak on, so if this is too distressing, please feel free to keep scrolling or come back to this when you feel you are ready. For some people, they may have lost a friend or loved one to a hate crime or other bigoted attack. For some reason, Trans Day of Remembrance came to mind, so that may be significant for someone here. You could be transgender yourself and share the community with this friend. They had a bright, bubbly and engaging personality and smile, incredibly warm and caring. I am sending all my love and condolences, and want you to know there were so grateful for your friendship and comradery. That’s all I’m getting, but I needed to write this down, on the chance it reaches who it needs to. 
You need to know that even if life is really awful right now, that it will not be this way forever. You will recover and heal and people love you more than you know.
Group 4
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For this group, I feel nothing but joy and optimism. You got over the worst and are now preparing for the best. I see a holiday dinner with your chosen family and really reaping the rewards for all your hard work. All your strength and prayers have paid off, particularly for a Virgo sun, Libra rising, Pisces moon.
You are manifesting your goals and speaking them into existence. For some of you, you could be confessing to a crush with Pisces placements and possibly a Sagittarius moon. I feel like you manifested this person into your life, and you want nothing more than to kiss them. They can be very flirtatious and mischievous but they have a kind heart. You may have manifested them with the water method or 369 method. Go for it!
For others, I see you cutting off an abusive and toxic ex and friends for good. I feel there was a third party, cheating and mixed signals about the state of the relationship. This is quite delicate, but for others, I see you having a friend who did not hesitate to betray you and date this person, and even become intimate with them behind your back. Seeing their true colours was the best thing for you, even if it was gut-wrenching. You deserve only the best calibre of people in your life, and “birds of a feather flock together.” They are nasty people and they can have each other. I see you may be finding yourself in friend groups where there is a LOT of toxicity, gossip and drama. Someone could be a Capricorn sun or moon as well. Someone watches Home Alone every year with blue makeup and nails, this could be a sign or confirmation.
This is coming up because it is all about a fresh start for some of you. Cleansing ego and bad habits within yourself and those of others will be ever so good for you, and you will benefit immensely from dropping this energy which has kept you stagnant for so long. I’m also hearing go paint your nails and treat yourself! You deserve it!
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neuroglitch · 1 year ago
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Sometimes my brain will choose an odd hill to die on.
I keep thinking of the stupid AITA post with the lobster fisherman.
I don't really care if it's real or whatever, but like I keep checking the notes and feeling genuine hurt from the complete confidence with which everyone pegs this guy as the asshole.
I feel like there's some huge cultural societal memo that I've missed bc they don't even explain what they mean for the most part and I'm left grasping at straws. Like there's some huge red flag that I'm missing.
But at the same time bc I can't find that huge red flag all I see is people being extremely judgmentally secure that someone is an asshole based on a few quirky statements that communicate zero ill intent or behaviour towards other people (at least not in a direct manner than I'm able to catch unto).
Like I know it's not that fucking deep, yet I keep checking back on the notes, and every day new people agree to see this obviously huge red flag that I can't see. And it makes me feel bad.
Because either I'm naive and blind to the implications. Or people are just a lot more narrow-minded and judgemental than I would assume, and automatically all agreeing on an extremely bad faith reading of a pretty straightforward statement. It makes me scared to describe my life or my thought processes.
[Everyone's always against amatonormativity and ableism and The Nuclear Family Unit or just normative bullshit in general, until the oddness takes a shape they don't immediately recognize as some alternative "accepted deviation", and then everyone's sooooooo secure in their vibe checks. Sigh. ]
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marvelmaniac715 · 1 year ago
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Specifically for @lydiavalentino. This is the cast list that accompanies my Schmigadoon! Season Three pitch. I’ll include actors, character names and character descriptions so that you can get an idea of what I’m going for :).
Cecily Strong - Melissa Gimble:
Melissa is the same as she always is, kind, funny, a big fan of musicals, but the stress of parenting two hyperactive twins is starting to wear her out, and she’s less willing to join in with Schmigadoon shenanigans than usual, and she may yell at this season’s leprechaun when he eventually appears for putting her children in danger. Also, is a forbidden romance with a stranger who’s not so unfamiliar in the cards? Melissa is faithful to Josh, but old lovers and crushes have a certain way of getting to you…
Keegan-Micheal Key - Josh Skinner:
Again, Josh is the same as he always is, except he too is stressed out by raising twins and his teaching position, and he’s developed a much stronger interest in musicals that he, along with his wife, tries to pass down to his children. In my hypothetical third season, his reaction to the newest version of Schmigadoon (the ‘Schmoods’ and surrounding French district) is a lot like Melissa’s reaction to Schmigadoon in Season One, because this is the period of musicals he is most familiar with and he gets so excited whenever he spots a reference. Is he a cool dad? Well… he certainly has a thing or two to learn from a few Schmigadoonians, but he and his kids get along great (even if he is a little overprotective at times).
Dove Cameron - The Princess:
That isn’t a placeholder. That’s the character’s name. Think of Rapunzel from Into The Woods, but combine her with Cosette from Les Mis and Christine from Phantom of the Opera. She’s your typical ingenue at the start of the season, sheltered from the world by her adoptive mother (we’ll get to her) and dreaming of romance. But as the season progresses, she (with a little encouragement from Melissa) begins to break out of her shell and pursue romance with mysterious French Schmigadoonians (oh, the scandal of it all!).
Aaron Tveit - The Prince:
The Prince is a more villainous character, he falls in love with The Princess and is convinced that they are destined to be together (think of the two princes from Into The Woods with Marius from Les Mis levels of pining) and refuses to take no for an answer. This would be a sort of dark reimagining of Jenny and Topher’s romance from Season Two, and Melissa would point this out at one point (but nobody sees the comparison except for her). Does he find romance by the end? Perhaps, but that is yet to be decided.
Alan Cumming - The Wolf:
As you can see, a lot of character names are symbolic (a lot like Into The Woods). At the beginning of the season, Josh and Melissa are convinced that he’s the one who lured their children away (hey, they’ve seen Into The Woods and The Wolf looks VERY similar to the wolf that ate Little Red Riding Hood in that musical, they don’t want to take chances) but it’s a red herring, and the ‘sneaking around’ they catch him doing is merely to provide for his pup, Clawsette (Little Cosette from Les Mis, slightly inspired by the SNL Diner Lobster Sketch with the lobsters in terms of naming). His character will help to teach lessons about parenting to Josh and Melissa via a song, and the character may be French, with subtle references to Duly Blight and Mayor Menlove because of course there will be.
Kristen Chenoweth - The Witch:
What can I say? She’s the witch from Into The Woods, I just wanted to allow Dove Cameron and Kristen Chenoweth to play mother and daughter again. She would also teach Josh and Melissa about parenting in a VERY Children Will Listen inspired song.
Jane Krakowski: Leader:
Leader of the troupe of children that lures Josh and Melissa’s twins into the woods. She’s seemingly kind at first (she’s inspired by the Narrator from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat after all) but she soon reveals a sinister dark side reminiscent of Bill Sykes from Oliver, and she makes the children under her employ carry out her dirty work (crime such as theft).
Patrick Page - The Narrator:
The Narrator from Into The Woods, but more sinister. There’s a running gag where Josh and Melissa (big Into The Woods fans) continuously try to sacrifice him to whatever monster or rival is onscreen, thinking that that will help them to ‘reclaim their own stories’ like it did for the characters in Into The Woods. He gets more songs that show off his awesome deep voice, and he isn’t employed by the leprechauns. He’s their father. That would extend the parenting theme I’m trying to build and show the sometimes strained relationships between parents and children.
Martin Short - All Three Leprechauns:
He’s back as the leprechauns! This season’s new addition is Johnathan, a very Rent inspired character who may have a striped scarf. And yes, he would have a line paying homage to that show, such as ‘sorry my land isn’t as flashy as my brothers’, I’m struggling to pay rent’. It’s stupid, I know, but it brings me joy.
Tituss Burgess - Unsure:
I want him to be in this, but I’m not sure HOW. He’s a phenomenal actor though, so I want him to at least have a cameo as a French villager (Ratatouille the Musical, anyone?).
Fred Armisen - Unsure:
He’s in the same boat as Tituss for me, but I would perhaps cast him as Alan Cumming’s character’s ‘mate’ or something so that Layton x Menlove could live on in a way.
Ann Harada - Leader of the Rats:
Somebody had to do it. She’s basically Grizzabella from Cats as a rat, and when the characters help out in the final episode, she leads the charge. This is no slight against Ann Harada, she’s great, but I thought it would be fun if she could have a song (or a brief snippet of a song that keeps getting cut off as a running gag similar to ‘I’ll drink to that’ lady from last season) inspired by Memory from Cats.
Jaime Camil - The Phantom:
No prizes for guessing which 1980s musical inspired this character. Melissa has a big crush on the Phantom of the Opera, and she may have a brief romance with this character (Baker’s Wife from Into The Woods all over again) but she gets over herself and sets him up with The Princess, seeing her as a version of Christine, and that it would be the ultimate fan service to set the two up together in order to ‘fix the ending’ of Phantom.
Ariana Debose - Francine:
Fantine from Les Mis, but she doesn’t die. And she has a son unlike Fantine. (Mason, played by the boy who played Carson in Season One). She helps to teach parenting lessons due to her dedication to her son. By the end of the season, she may have a romance with The Princess, but I’m currently undecided.
The Twins - Casting Unclear:
The twins are about nine or ten, and they’re scrappy and adventurous. They love musicals like their parents, but because this is their coming of age story (Into The Woods, remember) they will go from naive to wise by the end of the season, after overthrowing a powerful dictator, of course…
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A common argument against Christianity by many atheists is the idea that Christians don't follow the dietary laws of the Old Testament. I recently heard one ask, "Why are you not firebombing Red Lobster restaurants for serving shellfish?" and "Why are you not calling for the dissolution of clothing companies that produce garments of mixed fabrics?"
The question being asked is a good one, but it shows a common misunderstanding about the role and purpose of Jesus, known as the Messiah.
Before we specifically address the question of shellfish, I would ask as easier question: why do you think Christians no longer participate in the Old Testament sacrifice of animals in the Temple?
The transition from the sacrificial system of the Old Testament to its fulfillment in Jesus Christ provides a solid foundation for understanding why Christians no longer adhere to certain Old Testament practices.
The Old Testament Levitical sacrifices were a significant aspect of God's law for the Israelites. These sacrifices were given by God as a means for His people to atone for their sins and maintain their covenant relationship with Him. However, these sacrifices were insufficient and always intended to point towards something—or rather, Someone—greater.
In the book of Hebrews, the author spends significant time exploring this shift. In Hebrews 10:1, we read, "For since the law has but a shadow of the good things to come instead of the true form of these realities, it can never, by the same sacrifices that are continually offered every year, make perfect those who draw near." The repeated sacrifices of the Old Testament were, in a way, a reminder of sin and an anticipation of the coming redemption.
That redemption arrived in the person and work of Jesus Christ. He is described as the ultimate high priest and the perfect sacrifice in one. Hebrews 10:10 says, "And by that will, we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all." Christ's death on the cross was the fulfillment of the sacrificial system. His sacrifice was sufficient to atone for all the sins of those united to Him, rendering the repeated sacrifices of the Old Testament no longer necessary.
This critical shift extends beyond the sacrifices and encapsulates other elements of the law, including dietary regulations and rules about clothing. Like the sacrifices, these laws were also pointers, ways of setting the Israelites apart from other nations and reminding them of their unique relationship with God. With the coming of Christ, these laws found their fulfillment as the Gentiles are now ingrafted into the covenant community. God's people are now defined not by external observance of the law, but by faith in Christ. Therefore, just as we understand that the Old Testament sacrifices are no longer necessary due to their fulfillment in Christ, so too can we understand that the laws regarding diet and clothing have found their completion in Him. They served their purpose under the old covenant, but under the new covenant, we are no longer bound by their specific requirements.
The apparent critique of Christians' non-adherence to certain Old Testament laws, such as dietary restrictions or textile regulations, is one to be further addressed with careful consideration of some Biblical texts.
Let's take a look at Acts 10, wherein we find the apostle Peter's vision from God after the resurrection of Jesus. In this vision, a sheet descends from heaven containing all manner of creatures - many of which are explicitly labelled "unclean" in the Mosaic law. Yet, the voice of God commands Peter to rise, kill, and eat these creatures. Peter, an observant Jew, objects, noting that he has never consumed anything unclean. In response, God declares, "What God has made clean, do not call common."
The declaration signifies not just a change in dietary rules, but a profound theological shift. It anticipates the meeting between Peter and Cornelius, a Gentile - the inclusion of Gentiles among God's chosen people is a theme that reverberates throughout the New Testament, and is in fact symbolized in the dismissal of the dietary laws.
God clearly and vividly illustrated that the legal distinction between what is clean and unclean has been done away with, suggesting that the barrier that once separated Jews and Gentiles has been demolished. This metaphorical barrier is symbolically represented by the dietary laws among other Old Testament laws.
The Apostle Paul echoed this sentiment by declaring a once hidden mystery: Gentiles, who were once considered outside the covenant, can now partake in the same salvation offered to the Jewish people. They are no longer excluded or separate, but are now grafted into the same body of believers, a unified church that transcends ethnic and cultural divisions.
These biblical truths are reflected in his letters to the Ephesians (2:16; 3:6), where he writes of how both Jews and Gentiles are reconciled into one body through the cross, abolishing in his flesh the law with its commandments and regulations. And in the mystery of Christ, the Gentiles are heirs together with Israel, members together of one body, and sharers together in the promise in Christ Jesus.
Therefore, the shift from Old Testament dietary and fabric laws to the teachings of the New Testament isn't a contradiction, but rather a manifestation of a greater plan. A plan in which the gospel is for all people, regardless of their ethnicity or cultural heritage, unified in Christ. So, the New Testament believers' practices, including the consumption of shellfish and wearing of mixed fabrics, are a testament to this newfound liberty and unity in Christ. They are visible signs of a heart transformed by the grace of the gospel and a life marked by the Spirit's work, rather than the outward adherence to the ceremonial laws of the Old Testament.
Romans 7:1-6 provides a vivid metaphor to illustrate the transition from the Old Covenant to the New Covenant in Christ. The Apostle Paul compares the Old Testament law to a marriage covenant, where we were bound to our spouse (the law) as long as we lived. However, when that spouse dies, we are released from the law of the marriage. In the same vein, through Christ's death and resurrection, we have metaphorically 'died' to the law. This death has released us from the binding demands and penalties of the law, akin to a widow being released from her marriage obligations. But the analogy doesn't stop there. Paul goes on to say that we now 'belong to another'. This is a reference to our new union with Christ. We're not left as widows, but remarried—to Him who was raised from the dead. Our relationship to the law has fundamentally changed; we are no longer under its condemnation but live under the grace and liberty of our new 'marriage' to Christ.
Moreover, Jesus Himself in Mark 7:18-19 declared all foods clean. He challenges the Pharisees' preoccupation with external cleanliness, implying that what defiles a person comes from the heart, not from what they eat.
In regards to wearing garments of mixed fabric, it's essential to understand the historical and symbolic significance of this command. The law found in Leviticus 19:19 was given to the Israelites to set them apart from surrounding nations, as a physical reminder of their unique covenant relationship with God. However, under the New Covenant in Christ, this external symbol of separation is no longer necessary. As Galatians 3:28 states, "There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus."
Thus, the Christian is not bound by these Old Testament restrictions because they have been superseded by the New Covenant in Christ. His work has not dismissed the law, but rather fulfilled it, rendering the literal observance of these laws obsolete while preserving their spiritual essence. In Christ, we are all made clean, and the external symbols that once set God's people apart are no longer needed. It is a heart turned toward God, not diet or dress, that now signifies belonging to His covenant people.
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kuiperoid · 7 months ago
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Optical Illusion: Perceptions of Race and Sexuality with Right-Wing Internet Personality Nick Fuentes, Part 1
[originally posted here]
Introduction
Nick Fuentes has been a voice for online far right youth since 2017. In that time, he has been on the receiving end of many criticisms from both right and left-wing voices, not purely for his claimed ideologies, but his very identity. On one side, he is attacked as a racist, homophobic, reactionary white supremacist, while the other derides him as an anti-white, anti-family gay Mexican. Despite the initial assumption that these are contradictory claims, some of these may not be as much in opposition as one might think. While not all of these claims can be entirely verified, what is clear is that Fuentes’s consistent focus on the importance of optics plays the greatest role, as how he is perceived by others may be more important than whatever the truth is. 
Who is Nick Fuentes?
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Nick Fuentes on during an episode of America First
Nicholas Joseph Fuentes was born August 18, 1998 to William “Bill” Fuentes and Lauren Chicco-Fuentes in a suburb outside of Chicago, Illinois, along with his twin sister, Melissa. He says that he was baptized Catholic, but that his parents were not overly religious. His father worked for a technological manufacturing company, providing his wife and two children with a comfortable upbringing. An indication of the ideologies he grew up with can be illustrated in Bill Fuentes’s take on restaurants, insisting that they never go to Applebee’s or Red Lobster, saying in one episode of his show because they were associated with black people, though in another stream, the reason was was because they were associated with poor people. Whichever was the case, these were two groups Fuentes was raised to not associate himself with. His high school classmates described him as a fairly normal guy who played the euphonium in marching band and was part of the school’s award-winning speech and Model UN teams, eventually serving as president of the student council. He began broadcasting conservative politics through high school radio, though his views were still typically within what were considered normal views among elected Republicans of the early 2010s.
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Fuentes, center, with his fellow high school Model UN team members in 2013
Things began to change during Fuentes’s freshman year at Boston University. He has cited a variety of factors leading to this transition, namely the election of Donald Trump as president. He bought his first personal Bible and reconnected with his Catholic faith, taking a particularly traditionalist and literalist interpretation. During February 2017, he started broadcasting his show, America First with Nicholas J. Fuentes, on the Right Side Broadcasting Network. On this show, he criticized immigration, multiculturalism, and the influence of “globalists.” His increasingly extreme views were allowed to continue to be broadcasted until that August when he attended the Unite the Right rally in Charlottesville. On campus, he received pushback from the students and decided to leave Boston University. Initially, he planned to transfer to Auburn University in Alabama, but ultimately decided to leave college in favor of returning home to be a full-time streamer out of his parents’ basement. 
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Fuentes seen advocating for Donald Trump in 2017
Fuentes continued streaming his show, now with much less to lose. His platform would change over the years as he would be banned from YouTube, Twitch, and DLive, eventually setting up his own site, Cozy.tv, for himself as his political allies. In his view, the mainstream Republican party was too lenient. He intended to push the overton window further right until his ideals became reflective of what electable politicians could say. Across his platforms, Fuentes would espouse bigoted views against immigrants, non-white people generally, Jews, Protestants, feminists, women generally, the LGBT community, and anyone who did not fit into his narrow white Catholic nationalist view of who should represent the United States, his monologues peppered with slurs for the groups in question. He often pushed conspiracy theories, such as Holocaust denial and claiming that the media and politics were run by Jewish overlords for whom he blamed for the rampant “degeneracy” of modern society. He would often refer to himself in grandiose terms, calling himself a genius and comparing himself to Jesus and various historical dictators. Over the next few years, Fuentes would build his following, which he would refer to as the “groypers” after a Pepe the Frog meme. America First would evolve from simply the name of his show to a full-blown organization.
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The “groyper” meme for which Fuentes’s followers are named
In 2019, Fuentes would lead his followers in what came to be known as the “Groyper Wars,” where he instructed his followers to disrupt events thrown by Turning Point USA. To those unfamiliar, Turning Point USA is an organization dedicated to organizing conservative college students and resisting progressive sentiment on college campuses. Fuentes took umbrage with them for their support of Israel and acceptance of non-white and LGBT conservatives. Guests at the Turning Point events included Donald Trump Jr, Ben Shapiro, and others deemed not far enough right for the groypers where they would take over Q&A sections and heckle the speakers. One incident that stands out in the memory of many is an event in which Turning Point president and founder Charlie Kirk was speaking with his guest, a gay black veteran, and the many groypers attacked the appeal to identity politics, one asking “how does anal sex help us win the culture war?” Another incident that caught the ire of mainstream conservatives everywhere is when Fuentes and several of his followers accosted Ben Shapiro, a conservative commentator whom Fuentes often clashed with on account of his being Jewish and staunchly pro-Israel, while he was with his family in public. This incident was disavowed by Meghan McCain, Nikki Haley, and many other mainstream conservatives in the media. 
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Fuentes and fellow groypers as they confronted Ben Shapiro with his wife and children
With the Groyper Wars came Fuentes’s concern with optics. He told his followers in his posts leading up the events that they should be sure to be dressed in a suit and tie to look presentable. When he would later be one of the focus points of the episode of documentarian Louis Theroux’s series Forbidden America that focused on far-right online personalities, he mentioned that something he found off-putting about many of the attendees at the Unite the Right rally at Charlottesville was how “un-optical” many of them presented, making Roman salutes and whatnot. This may surprise some given his documented use of fascist talking points and slurs on his own show. However, he often presented with a veneer of irony that allowed a shadow of a doubt of his full authenticity about anything he said. 
The highpoint of America First would come when Fuentes held the first AFPAC (America First Political Action Conference). Fuentes and his associates were banned from CPAC (Conservative Political Action Conference) due to his clashes with various members. He decided to throw his own event to rival CPAC. The first was held in Washington DC while the later AFPACs were held in Florida. The first was held in February of 2020. Speakers included then-Identity Evropa leader Patrick Casey, Daily Caller editor Scott Greer, political commentator and often-declared groyper mother - despite being Filipino-American -  Michelle Malkin, and Fuentes himself. The 2021 AFPAC was briefly thought to be in limbo due to both COVID restrictions and January 6th antics, but it went on with Arizona Congressman Paul Gosar appearing as the surprise keynote speaker, despite curiously also appearing at rival event CPAC later that day. A big surprise came in 2022 when right wing political activist and provocateur Milo Yiannopoulos, with whom Fuentes had been in contact for the past few years to help coach his public appearance and served as a speaker at that year’s AFPAC, got him in contact with Georgia Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene who gave a speech opening the event. Greene was heavily criticized for appearing at a “white supremacist event,” leading her to disavow Fuentes, saying she was not aware of who he was or the nature of the event when she agreed to speak there. This disavowal was the start of a feud between Greene and Fuentes that has carried on ever since. The keynote speaker for that year was former Maricopa County, Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio, known for being tough on immigrants. Arizona Republican governor candidate Kari Lake had intended to speak, but ultimately withdrew on account of Fuentes’ support of Russia’s invasion of Ukraine. The 2023 AFPAC had a decided change in tone with Internet personality Nicolas “Sneako” Kenn De Balinthazy serving as the guest speaker, reflecting the near total change in the nature of the associations America First currently hold.
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Fuentes with Marjorie Taylor Greene before her speech at AFPAC III in 2022
More dramatic shifts began in 2021. Fuentes and select followers attended many leadup rallies prior to the storming of the US Capitol on January 6 and were even present outside, though neither Fuentes nor any of his direct associates breached the entrance. His involvement in the event led Patrick Casey to disassociate from him and for his channel to be excised from DLive, the primary factor leading him to found Cozy.tv. The beginning of the year did not go as horribly as one may have thought. AFPAC II was still held in February as planned.  He claims his assets were seized and he was put on the no-fly list, which would be the main discussion of his 2022 America First-produced documentary, The Most Canceled Man in America. Not being able to travel by plane, Fuentes was prompted to travel by car, which led him to go on the White Boy Summer road trip of 2021 where he held meet-ups and speaking engagements. 
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Fuentes and close associates at the US Capitol on January 6, 2021
However, as the year went on, questions arose. While several groypers did participate in the storming of the capital and faced legal action, Fuentes himself appeared to be let off completely free for being a supposed leader of a far-right political movement. This led to speculations that Fuentes was acting as a federal informant. Some past associates claimed his assets were not seized as long as he claimed and, specifically, former associate Jaden McNeil would later say his being banned from flying was not because of January 6th antics or being unvaccinated, but because he had previously harassed a flight attendant. One by one, various prominent members of America First would disassociate from him. Many felt that he flip-flopped on various issues. For being the leader of a movement so heavily defined by its opposition to Jewish people and Israel, it was odd for him to support proud Jewish Zionist Laura Loomer’s congressional bid in Florida. Another area was the support he held for former President Donald Trump, the basis of the identity for much of the US far-right movement, when he briefly worked for rapper Kanye West’s short-lived presidential bid, a black man who, for all of his talk about disliking the Jews, something Fuentes was now back on after Laura Loomer’s run for congress fell through, supported reparations and open borders and who dated, married, and reproduced interracially. Shortly after that came to an end for reasons that are not known for certain, it was revealed that an associate of Fuentes’s, far-right activist and Stop the Steal founder Ali Alexander (née Ali Akhbar) had solicited sex and lewd photos and videos from teenage boys, often using his connection to Fuentes as leverage. Fuentes has attempted to publicly distance himself from Alexander, but various past associates kept it alive in the discussion, in addition to claims that he was aware of Alexander’s proclivities and attempted to silence his victims. Since then, Fuentes has mainly associated with Internet personalities over more politically active types, such as Calvin Lee “LeafyIsHere” Vail Marquez, Brandt “BasedBrandt” Wiggins, the aforementioned Sneako, and, most recently, Hannah Pearl “JustPearlyThings” Davis, the last being a rare female member of the Fuentes crew. 
The Utter Latinidad of Fuentes’s Perceptions of Race and Class
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Fuentes’s 23andMe results, which he broadcasted on an episode of America First in 2021
When US residents first learn about Nick Fuentes, especially in the context of him being referred to as a “white supremacist” or something similar, questions often arise about his ethnic identity, given his decidedly non-Anglo sounding surname. His ethnic makeup is fairly common knowledge: his father is half-Mexican-American and half-Irish-American while his mother is Italian-American, the part of his heritage that he typically describes himself as most closely identifying with. Fuentes did take a 23andMe test in 2021 where he published the results, disappointed to find himself at “only” seventy-nine-point-one percent European, with indigenous American and North African following as the next highest ethnic groups found in his DNA, though his fans assured him that 23andMe gave inaccurate results to “troll Nazis.” It is important to note that these ethnic DNA tests are famously unreliable of true measures and only recognize what the testee has inherited genes from, regardless of who one is related to, meaning anyone can have more or less of any given heritage from a technical standpoint and it certainly has no method of measuring the cultures one actually grew up the most affiliated with. 
The approach to Fuentes’s heritage itself differs by culture. In the US, someone who has up to a quarter of heritage from anywhere is typically still considered a member of that community, a policy going back to slavery, but has been maintained to this day. Say, if Fuentes had decided to apply for a Mexican-American scholarship when he was applying to college, he would have been considered eligible for most, with the exception of “child-of-immigrants” ones. Multiple studies have shown that job applicants in the US with names perceived as “ethnic” are often passed over for job considerations, and, even at a quarter Mexican, it is possible that this could have impacted Fuentes or his older relatives in the past on account of his surname. In Latin America, someone born in the US, even to Latin American-born parents, is typically seen as a “gringo,” let alone someone with only one set of great-grandparents born in Latin America, so Fuentes would certainly not be seen as Latino or Mexican in Mexico; he would simply be seen as someone from the United States. Obviously, having a Spanish last name is not seen as inherently “ethnic” in Latin America; Fuentes is certainly a Spanish last name over, say, an indigenous one. There is also the idea of whiteness, which his right wing detractors who find him to not be white enough or his left wing detractors trying to appeal to possible hypocrisy often make a point about. To Latinos, especially ones from Latin America, the idea that someone with Latin American heritage could not possibly be seen as white is often confusing. There are plenty of people with entirely European heritage throughout Latin America, including Mexico, where Fuentes’s paternal grandfather’s parentage derives from. In an interview with Brittany Venti (legal surname Dier), a fellow traditionalist Internet personality herself of both black and white heritage, Fuentes said that his Mexican family was “half Spanish.” It is noteworthy that most Latin American countries do not have “one quarter and it counts” approaches to race; in fact, many who would not be considered white in the US are essentially seen as white in these countries. Never mind Fuentes’s green eyes and pale skin; there are those with black hair, brown eyes, and in fact brown skin who are essentially seen as white for having simply not been raised indigenous. While colorism and other approaches to feature certainly do play a role in Latin America, in many ways, upbringing is more important than one’s specific identity, why even a child of purely indigenous Oaxacan parents born and raised in the US and engulfed in US culture is seen as more of a “gringo” in Latin America than a Mexican-born blonde and blue-eyed child of Ukrainian immigrants, a population many from the US are surprised to discover is not insignificant when they visit Mexico. 
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Fuentes being interviewed by Brittany Venti as she role plays as Dr. “MILFy,” an  homage to Dr. Melfi from The Sopranos of which proudly Italian-American Fuentes claims to be a fan
It is worth noting that part of the embrace of white populations in Latin America despite them not originating there is not pure multiculturalism; in fact, some would say it is because those are the populations that the founding of many Latin American countries was determined to aspire towards. As a result, the fact that populations that are not entirely white are more likely to identify as that than indigenous or anything else speaks more of aspirational whiteness than anything else. The US census recognizes that Latinos come from different races and will often have a follow-up question for those who list themselves as Latino, asking which race they most closely identify with; the majority, even those with some amount of indigenous heritage, will list themselves as white more commonly than anything else. Curiously, many in the US who are just as Latino as Nick Fuentes but of different political leanings or simply have different goals have been known to pull out the “I’m not white, I’m Latino” when the topic of race arises. In a twist of fate, Fuentes’s identity as white and referring to the need for the country that he lives in to be majority white and run by white people makes him closer to historical Latinidad than traditional WASP whiteness of the US.
Fuentes is not the only modern example of someone with Latino heritage in the US to embrace white supremacist ideology, even some more decidedly non-white than him. One of the most recent examples is Mauricio Martinez Garcia, a thirty-three-year-old who committed a mass shooting against a mall in Allen, Texas on May 6, 2023. When the news of the shooting dropped, there was much confusion with regards to his identity. His name gave away his status as a Latino, which made his online presence, revealed shortly afterwards, disconcerting to some. He was found to be following many white supremacist and Neo-Nazi pages, in addition to incel and anti-semitic pages. Images of tattoos of swastikas and SS lightning bolts clashed against his melanated skin. This became more clear in reading his posts in which he discussed his conflicted identity as a Latino who he felt was called to help save the white race. Critics of Fuentes were quick to point out that many of his videos were found to be in Garcia’s history. Garcia did address Fuentes in a somewhat disparaging way when he discussed his conflict over reproducing. He specifically felt doing so would not be beneficial, as he would only want to do so with a white woman, but did not want “a bunch of little Nick Fuenteses running around.” Even as a sometimes follower of Fuentes’s work, Garcia viewed him as a worthless mutt.
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A meme posted by Allen Mall shooter Mauricio Martinez Garcia
The accusations of anti-whiteness stand in stark contrast to some of Fuentes’s more renowned statements about keeping the US a white country and fighting off the great replacement. Examples that his conservative critics often use include his various rants complaining about white people at the airport, complaining about their obesity and lack of style. After his former associates Ethan Ralph and Jaden McNeil began to criticize him, he often referred to them, white men from working class backgrounds in the South and Midwest respectively, as “trailer trash,” which would stir up these accusations yet again. He lamented in one episode about how right-wing political figures lacked the class of their opponents, referencing the recent divorces of Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert. He would stand in opposition to more mainstream conservatives during the summer of 2023 when Virginia-based singer Oliver Anthony’s song “Rich Men North of Richmond” went viral to be praised as the voice of working class white Americans, as he would mock Anthony for his ragged appearance and the defeated, whining nature of the song. Across these comments, however, there is a factor being overlooked: classism. In none of these comments did Fuentes ever criticize these people on the basis of their whiteness the way he often does with members of other groups. If anything, his complaints were that these particular white people seemed to stem not from their whiteness, even as he commented on them being white or “a type of white person we need to see less of,” but the fact that they presented the way they did in spite of their whiteness. If anything, there was an expectation that, being white, they should be capable of achieving more and presenting more elegantly, while members of other groups were simply expected to not achieve as much or present as well to begin with. Classism is an issue that political figures in the US, especially those on the right, avoid discussing to circumvent accusations of communist sympathies and because class supposedly does not exist in the US the way that it does in other countries. There is a definite confusing manner in which politicians in the US, particularly right-wing politicians, balance the attempt to appeal to working class people with the inherent aporophobia required to participate in these political institutions. 
In that sense, Fuentes’s Latinidad is again emphasized in his perception of class. Class and classism definitely still exist in the US, but are ignored. Meanwhile, class is the basis for much of society in many Latin American countries to this day and its existence is not ignored the way it is in the United States. As a result, class is treated as something aspirational to associate with. While wealth is something seen as a good thing to achieve in the US, individuals typically want to be seen as having started at the bottom and earned it, rather than having been born into it. In this sense, it is also typical in the US for people to want to be seen as “down with the people '' and as disconnected from wealth as possible. This differs from the approach taken by many in Latin America, where, regardless of where one started in terms of class, it is important to not be associated with the lower class. People in the US generally want to appear that they started from a lower point, whereas people in Latin America often want to be seen as having started higher, with the assumption being that that is where they remained. Consider critiques of gender neutral language. At the end of the day, the prejudice against gender neutral language in any culture is typically based in homophobia and transphobia, but members of different cultures try to paint it as an appeal to class. In the US, doing so is called “elitist” and a sign of being overeducated, whereas critics in Latin America write off gender neutral language as appearing “lower class” and “uneducated.” Both of these emphasize what is seen as important in the respective cultures. For being “America First,” the America in question being the United States of America, Fuentes has clearly retained some cultural influence from his Latin American heritage. It is important to note that his father, the one he received his Mexican heritage from, was the one who instilled in him the importance of not going to restaurants like Applebees and Olive Garden. Several of Fuentes’s conservative critics have mocked him for proudly talking about how he does not work out and has never done any sort of physical labor, but to him, this is a sign of class rather than unrelatability. It is this that makes him a leader, in his mind.
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A caricature of Fuentes often shared by his conservative critics, mocking his “brownness” and perceived effeminacy
The contradictions in perceptions of race exist among the groypers themselves. The movement claims to be explicitly pro-white American, yet peering among the usernames in any America First chat, it is not uncommon to see examples such as “Based Guatemalan” and “Indian Groyper.” In the discussions they have among themselves, some will occasionally admit to being “half black” or some other race seens as inferior in these circles. One commenter notably made reference to being “castizo, like Nick,” but insisted he intended to marry a white woman and “breed out” his “inferior” non-white genes. This aspirational concept of “marrying up” is common among Fuentes’s followers, even as his own statements on the subject remain indecisive. Fuentes has formally said that racially mixed individuals should just “go with their phenotype” when choosing a spouse. He has specifically stated that, for his future wife and mother of his son, he would like for her to not only be white, and preferably Italian-American at that, but have blue or green eyes to assure that they do not have brown-eyed children. The racial makeup of the groypers is often something brought up by right-wing critics as a sign that the movement is not as it seems, that white men are too smart and that America First ultimately attracts young men and boys of color because they are the only ones who could fall for Fuentes’s antics. It is true that the proportion of nonwhite groypers cannot be ignored, but it is clear that what draws most of them in is an aspirational mindset common among immigrant populations, one that these boys have taken to the extent of believing that they need to align themselves with the image white supremacy to ultimately achieve whiteness.
At the end of the day, perception is the greatest factor once again. It is easier for critics to emphasize Fuentes’s non-whiteness than to acknowledge the reality that, on a day to day basis, he is more commonly perceived as a white man. It is not uncommon to see his critics refer to him with racialized terms such as “the Mexican child,” “Spicolas,” and “chupacabra,” or spelling his surname with a Z at the end rather than an S to make it read as more ethnic. Derisive artwork made of Fuentes also typically makes him appear more “ethnic,” in addition to mocking the perceived homosexuality and effeminacy they have projected onto him, which will be discussed later. Unsurprisingly, these critics, mostly white American men without much connection to immigrant communities, are unfamiliar with the nuances of the perceptions of race and class outside of the US. They would be correct in recognizing that his Mexicanness plays a role in his perceptions of those he criticizes, but not aware of how his criticisms are more based in classism than any sort of anti-white racism.
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Comments by critics of Fuentes using racially charged language
Part 2, Part 3
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madhousedarry · 7 days ago
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The Omen: Legacy of Lunacy | Chapter 17
Having finished his story, Carlton spat loudly on the pavement and looked at Asia Scallop with the gaze of a faithful dog who, having brought his mistress a bone, expects her to reward him with affection or a kind look from his clever eyes…
But instead of reacting to his news properly, our heroine, unexpectedly for Dick, suddenly grabbed the young man with her long arms and placed a wet and hot kiss on his lips, and then, pushing Carlton away from her, looked at him with eyes burning with love.
"My boy!" she cooed tenderly. "You have won my best reward!"
And with these words, she immediately lowered herself down in front of Carlton, who was stunned by this turn of events, and, unbuttoning the fly of his jeans, which were torn at the knees, with her playful hands, she freed his member - which, as "Damien The Thorn" correctly guessed, could not compare with his own mighty unit - and began to furiously jerk off the young man, who was red as a boiled lobster, with the movements that were already familiar to Dick.
At first he tried to break free from her tenacious grip, but soon, realizing that Asia was acting in all seriousness, he closed his eyes and began to moan loudly, attracting the attention of the Joponese people occasionally passing by on the street.
Finally, when Carlton, with the loudest of his moans, came violently right on his mistress's tits, the latter, removing her hands from his cock, immediately collected all the cum with her fingers and began to lick it off like custard.
At the same time, she did not forget to give the young man a look full of love and adoration - so that he would have no doubt that she was doing this to him out of true mutual love, and not because she had the character of a sellout whore who was ready to suck anyone, even her own daddy, if he were still alive!
Be that as it may, having rewarded her informant in such an emotional way, Asia Scallop finally rose from her knees and, taking the arm of her beloved "Damien The Thorn", waved her hand to Carlton, not forgetting to say goodbye to him:
"And I'll take your mouth next time, when you bring me information about the family of that freak, in whose house that steel-skinned Kasakhian landed! For now, be content with the fact that in my love for you I condescended to rub your tiny cock a little, my silly little Carlton!"
And, turning her back on the guy who was still standing there with his pants down and a guitar case on his back, Asia Scallop politely but firmly pulled "Damien The Thorn" along with her down the boulevard, where the lights of a sign of some entertainment establishment could be seen through the foggy haze.
Dick couldn't help but ask the question that had been tormenting him during the "awarding" procedure for Calton:
"Do you love me?"
Asia Scallop stopped dead in her tracks and turned her face towards him, with such hatred for him in her eyes!
But she quickly brought herself under control, extinguishing the raging rage in her huge eyes, which were like puddles of chocolate.
"What's the matter with you on duty, agent?" she said theatrically, playfully flicking Dick in the balls.
"Damien The Thorn" silently endured the insult, only turning slightly pale in the face. Meanwhile, Asia continued:
"Did you really think, you fool, that back then, in the stinking walls of that prison, I suddenly, for no apparent reason, developed real feelings for you?" she asked rhetorically. "Keep your pockets wide open! In war, all means are good, and since what we are now involved in is nothing more than a war between the security services of different countries, I have every right to recruit agents by any means necessary!"
"Recruit, you said?" Dick squeezed out of himself. "And what about that faggot with the thimble-sized dick? Do you really take me for an idiot to believe that you're recruiting him when by all indications he's long been your informant?"
"You're a fool," Asia answered peacefully. "I motivated Carlton - that's the name of this sweet boy, you shouldn't have called him a "faggot" - to take new actions so that he would continue to work for me."
"Then why did you say, you lying creature," Dick boiled over, "that you only fuck agents when you recruit them?"
"Do you have brains or sperm in your head?" Asia snapped at him. "I didn't say that I satisfy you all sexually only and exclusively at the moment of recruitment! You yourself used my services there, at an altitude of 12,000 meters, when you and I had already flown out on a mission? So what are you doing now, ungrateful condom, trying to catch me in a lie!"
"You're a whore, that's what you are!" "Damien The Thorn" cried out in his heart. "It's nothing for you to sleep with ten billion people at once! You don't care who you fuck - a poor old man, a small child, a legless invalid, representatives of your shameful gender of all ages, after all! And this after all your lying bullshit about your love for me! How can you be such a heartless creature?!"
"Cool down, bro," Asia asked him calmly. "No need for hysterics during the operation. And also don't forget that if I fuck you, it doesn't mean that we are husband and wife! Or have you long since considered me your legal wife, who belongs exclusively to you alone? I don't mind you using me as a toilet for sperm, but for me to marry you… What a hope, you fucking romantic!"
With these words, Asia Scallop spat in his face, and "Damien The Thorn" had to silently wipe himself with the sleeve of his jacket, without making any attempt to respond by kneeing the impudent whore in the pussy or, what's more, immediately punching her in the teeth.
"Damien The Thorn" was too reasonable for such wild actions, although he secretly dreamed about it, what a funny weirdo, right?! However, it may be that the whole thing was simply that he had already managed to get used to her manner of fucking with anyone, and only one thing was unusual for him - why was she not embarrassed to do it right on the street, where passers-by could see her actions?
But then again, wasn't he partly to blame for it? Hadn't she seduced him in Whorecouver prison and made him follow the agent's path? And anyway, what kind of stupid way is this, telling your recruiter that you love her and thinking that she loves you back? There is no love! There is only work!
Reassuring himself with thoughts like these, "Damien The Thorn" quickly realized that his anger was completely unfounded. Asia Scallop, of course, was not such a heartless creature - she just knew her business and knew how to use it with maximum efficiency in any circumstances…
And yet he felt so bad just because of the fact that he had to watch how, right before his eyes, the lady who literally half an hour ago was giving him a gorgeous blowjob in a taxi, after that time, as if nothing had happened, was jerking off some faggot with a dick the size of a thimble!
This not only touched "Damien The Thorn" to the quick, but also made him feel insulted in his manhood! But he understood that all these feelings of his were nothing more than his inflated opinion of his partner.
After all, if Asia really was such a bitch and a sellout whore, would she really talk to someone like someone she cared about no matter what? Asia Scallop was just a very experienced and cunning faggot who knew her stuff.
And she couldn't possibly be a heartless creature - because then it would have cost her nothing to kill him right there, in the cramped and stinking cell of the Whorecouver prison… But still, "Damien The Thorn" was hurt to tears that he was far from her only current sexual partner.
Asia, of course, knew about his thoughts, and she couldn't help but take them into account - but she didn't want to answer him either. But he felt with every cell of his body that he couldn't tolerate her bullying any longer.
He wanted her to finally give up her slutty ways at least for the time she was with him, so that he could feel like a human being in her presence, but no way! She didn't want to listen to his words and called him "a silly fool" in response.
And he had to put up with it, although it was given to him at great sacrifice. But, be that as it may, he still had one question for Asia Scallop.
"Okay, I already understood that you don't like me and you're only fucking me because I'm your agent," "Damien The Thorn" began in a conciliatory tone. "But I still want to know one thing - what was the point of this whole show with those two Joponese guys? Why did you make one of them eat your sock and silently endure your blows with a whip?"
It seemed that this was the only topic his companion had been waiting for. She smiled and said:
"Why?" she asked. "What do you think? So that they understand that I'm not just a whore from Analda, which is far away for them, but a proud citizen of a country whose neighbor has their tiny Jopon by the balls!"
"What?" Dick didn't understand. "You express your thoughts very confusingly."
"Your brain is so full of sperm that you don't understand simple things!" Asia flared up. "Are you really that stupid that you didn't understand what I'm talking about? I'm talking about the fact that you, I and all other citizens of Analda have every right to show these pussy-eyed people that we are buddies with The Omen Ica, for whom the entire culture of these short people with skin the color of urine is like a mouse fuss! And not only The Omen Ica, but Analda thinks so too! We, the neighbors of the most important power on Earth, can afford to commit outrages on the territory of states subject to our mighty neighbor! And if it weren't for this stubborn Union of Indestructible Nations, which constantly puts a spoke in The Omen Ica's wheels, then no one would have stopped us from establishing our dominance on this delicious continent, which bears my name, and using all these Asians by their direct name?"
"Which one?" was all Richard Nigel could squeeze out, stunned.
"They'll crawl on all fours, and we won't give a damn!" Asia said with her inimitable intonation. "And the fact that you don't understand what a great pleasure it is," she immediately continued, anticipating his question, "only shows that you're still young!"
And with these words Asia Scallop turned away from Dick and continued to walk forward, so the dejected "Damien The Thorn" had no choice but to follow her. How many times have we told the world that all The Omen Icans are assholes!
But there's a truth to every joke, as they say. Asia Scallop was a Analdian asshole - and that was as clear as day! And yet he liked her.
Be that as it may, he now followed her, not knowing where exactly she was leading him, but hoping that it would not be too far. And he was right - his beloved Asia soon led him to a small park with a fountain and a gazebo in the middle.
In the gazebo, which did not escape the watchful eye of "Damien The Thorn", by that time there were already two people sitting, and one of them was dressed in a black uniform with gold stripes.
Asia Scallop came up close to them and, to Dick's surprise, threw herself into the arms of the second one, who was dressed in a simple combination of a white checkered shirt and gray trousers.
He was very young, and there was not a single wrinkle on his face, unlike his neighbor in uniform, who looked about thirty years older than him and with his whole appearance resembled an old fart.
The young man was obviously pleased with the beautiful young girl's expression of affection for him, because Dick saw him smile and whisper something in her ear, which made Asia Scallop laugh - apparently it was some kind of compliment or joke.
"Damien The Thorn" saw her turn her back to him as a sign for him to leave her alone and not disturb her having a good time in the company of a handsome young man and his bald fart friend, who, apparently, was an important person here.
But Dick wasn't going to stand by and watch Asia Scallop brazenly cheat on him with a complete stranger.
He approached the gazebo and, not paying attention to the fact that none of the three even looked at him - and that was too much! - he extended his hand towards the young man and immediately grabbed his bony shoulder with a death grip.
The young man immediately screamed in pain, and his fart friend, who until that moment had shown no interest in what was happening and even seemed to be sleeping in his place in the gazebo - or maybe he was just drunk or too tired of life - immediately rushed at "Damien The Thorn" with the clear intention of standing up for his protegee.
But "Damien The Thorn" wasn't going to give in so easily. Without letting go of Asia's lover's shoulder, he managed to give the old fart a very precise kick in the solar plexus, causing the old man to fall to the floor like a sack of rotten potatoes.
And then, without giving him time to come to his senses and get to his feet, Dick decided on an unusual maneuver and deliberately did it so as to slip and fall backwards right onto the old fart, in order to try, if not to crush the enemy into a pancake, then at least temporarily disable him by pressing him to the floor of the gazebo.
However, the old fart turned out to be a tough nut to crack, and when "Damien The Thorn" fell on him with all the weight of his body, he rose to his feet with incredible strength for an old man, thereby pushing Dick off himself.
However, the latter was no fool either and immediately took a fighting stance, putting his fists forward as if he was now in the ring, and not in a small cozy gazebo in the middle of a city park.
In the heat of battle with these two assholes, Dick completely forgot about the representative of the fair sex, who at the very beginning of the fight thought it best to slip into the corner of the gazebo, where she sat for the time being on her haunches, pulling her head into her shoulders.
But when, before her eyes, the battle of the enraged males took an unexpected turn for everyone, she immediately jumped to her feet and, taking advantage of the fact that Richard Nigel was standing with his back to her, did not give him time to come to his senses and rushed to the aid of her young lover.
Her help consisted of kicking Dick as hard as she could in the back of his knee, causing him to lose his balance and fall to the floor.
Without waiting for him to get up, the old fart and his young friend immediately rushed at him together and with their combined efforts tied him up with thick ropes that appeared out of nowhere.
And then, beside himself with rage and resentment - or maybe just because he was tied hand and foot like the last loser - Dick rushed forward with all his might onto Asia Scallop, but immediately felt her lips on his face.
The thing is that this bitch, having gotten ahead of him by literally half a second, was already kissing him right in the eyes with her warm, wet lips until he felt that his mighty member was ready to jump out of his pants in order to begin its duties.
But then something unexpected happened - Asia Scallop suddenly released his head from her hands and, pushing him away from herself, stood up and walked away from the gazebo.
And the young man who was her lover - or perhaps just her friend? - came up to Dick and dropped to one knee before him, looking at him with a strange gleam in his eyes, the way an amateur entomologist might satisfy his curiosity about nature by devouring with his eyes a rare species of butterfly he had just pierced with a pin.
"Damien The Thorn" expected anything but that his opponents would suddenly forget about the fight and start staring at him as if he were not a person, but some kind of exhibition of miracles. And this was all the more strange because the young man was very handsome - and not only in appearance, but even in his movements.
He looked like some character from old Soviet comedies, which Richard Nigel, of course, could never have seen, but which you, my dear reader, can guess about!
Yes, my little green friend, the guy who rolled "Damien The Thorn", was the spitting image of Alexander Demyanenko in the role of the student-superhero Shurik, famous throughout the post-Soviet world! And, as in the case of Alexander Demyanenko, there was something in his eyes - I don't even know how to describe it.
It was the look of a man from another world and another era; he looked at Dick with some barely concealed regret or sympathy at the same time… And he also had a very strange smile: as if he wanted to say "it wasn't easy for you, I sympathize with you", but instead it seemed as if he didn't give a shit about anything.
In general, "Damien The Thorn" understood one very important circumstance in this situation - it was not worth it, oh, it was not worth it to attack this young man!
Suddenly, this same young man smiled unexpectedly and, rising from his knee, turned to his comrade - that same old fart in the black uniform. And then something strange happened - the old fart suddenly, for no apparent reason, knelt down and, raising his hands to the sky, began to silently mumble with his lips, as if he were reading a prayer.
The young man also hastened to follow his example and immediately sat down next to his comrade and assumed the same position. Dick saw how their heads touched each other so closely that it seemed as if they were examining each pimple on each other's faces.
He decided that it was time to clarify this matter and, having abandoned his unsuccessful attempts to throw off his bonds, he quietly asked:
"Where did Asia go?"
His two tormentors immediately stopped praying and turned to look at him. Apparently, the pitiful tone with which he uttered this question, which was generally devoid of romance and melancholy, seemed to them to be a manifestation of his weakness, which is why the old fart's lips stretched into a smile, and the young guy finally opened his mouth for the first time in all this time to say something very interesting - at least interesting to Dick in the situation he was currently in.
"You will not see Miss Scallop anymore," he began in a gentle and lyrical voice, like a dove. "She loved you so much that she can no longer stand to be near you. I know," he hastened to explain, "you think I'm talking nonsense. But you yourself understand - what other kind of love can there be between an agent and his recruiter? Exactly," he nodded in response to his own words, "none. It would only lead our entire operation to its inglorious failure. Therefore, Miss Scallop, having done everything that was required of her within the framework of this operation, went behind the scenes and gave us our turn to act. By the way, nice to meet you, Colonel Paul Buher," he suddenly interrupted, introducing himself as Dick by name and rank.
"And this," he pointed to the old fart, "is Major Bugenhagen. We've been working together for many years… Oh well!" he immediately cut off his reminiscences. "Listen to me carefully, Agent "Damien The Thorn"," he said, thereby demonstrating his knowledge of Dick's identity.
"Major Bugenhagen and I gathered here this morning out of respect for your work on your task. We waited here for hours, not knowing how to kill time, and when Miss Scallop finally brought you to the meeting, you, forgive me, almost killed us ourselves. It is not right, Agent "Damien The Thorn", it is not right to treat your superiors like that!" Without malice, even jokingly, he shook his finger at Dick.
"Besides, we are all working on the same problem now, so you have no reason to consider us both your enemies! However," Buher suddenly realized, "I understand what angered you so. You thought that Miss Scallop preferred my person to yours. So, get this into your head - this lady cannot psychologically attach herself to anyone with her feelings, she has learned this from many years of acting in all kinds of movies! Yes, yes, yes, you have never seen her on the screen, but this does not mean that this automatically turns the actress into an ordinary girl!"
"In general," Buher tried to return to the original topic of the conversation, "Miss Scallop has already played her role in this case, and you should not hope that for your sake our planners will write a couple more lines for her in the script of our operation. Do you finally understand me, Agent "Damien The Thorn"?" Paul Buher asked Dick in an unexpectedly rude tone.
Richard Nigel did not know what to answer to such a long and very boring speech, which he still had to assimilate with his brain, which in his position, when he was sitting tied up on the floor of the gazebo, was far from the easiest task.
He realized with difficulty that these were not enemies, but friends, and of course, with sadness in his heart, he realized that he would never see his new beloved, Asia Scallop, again in his life!
The latter didn't really upset him, since in the short time they spent together, he had already managed to become convinced of her mental instability, but despite all this, she had several undeniable advantages - she took his virginity, while possessing an incredible talent for ORAL, VAGINAL and - scary to think! - even ANAL sex!
And that's not counting her pretty face, firm tits and huge, simply gigantic-sized ass, thanks to which, apparently, her parents gave her such a wonderful name - ASIA.
Be that as it may, the loss of a live sex toy was an annoying, though not critical, problem for Dick, but, realizing that sooner or later she would break up with him anyway, he had already come to terms with it.
There was just one thing he didn't want - for those two idiots, Paul Buher and Bugenhagen, to think that he had allowed them to take away from him for a while the girl who rightfully belonged to him, like candy from a child.
And so, having already internally waved goodbye to the Analdian whore with the huge ass, he assumed the appearance of a husband who had been insulted in his best feelings and asked a question full of feigned hatred:
"Freaks, when will you give her back to me? Idiots, I will never ask you for this! Untie me immediately and let me run after her!"
Paul Buher ignored him and motioned to Bugenhagen to get up from his seat and come over to him. When the old fart did as he was told, the young man began whispering something to him, occasionally casting puzzled glances at Dick, which greatly embarrassed the latter.
He certainly didn't expect these two to suddenly untie the ropes, but he wasn't prepared to be ignored either. Finally, unable to stand the fact that these two idiots stubbornly refused to meet him halfway, he asked a new question:
"Okay, fuck Asia, but still tell me where she ran away from me?"
It seemed that these words were the very "open sesame!" that needed to be said in order to find the key to the hearts of Paul Buher and his friend Bugenhagen.
At least the latter, having stopped whispering to the young man, turned his wrinkled face to Dick and with a dull expression in his sheepish eyes said:
"Miss Scallop is returning to Whorecouver to immediately begin a plan codenamed "Vieira, Vieira, 82!" upon arrival," he said in a low voice, still smacking his lips. "What kind of plan it is is none of your business… For the time being," Bugenhanen immediately corrected himself. "In the meantime, give us an honest agent's promise that you won't attack both of us with your fists when we untie you."
Dick, realizing that it would be idiotic to let the chance slip through his fingers, immediately swore by all that was unholy, and Bugenhagen, threatening that if the opportunity arose, the resistance would blow his brains out with his service pistol, freed him from the ropes in no time…
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sacredcynic · 9 months ago
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In previous days I used to write these missives much more frequently, but in recent years I have not. One of the reasons is that I have been involved in other writing projects that have yielded a number of books. (If you haven't already - read my book on Paul - My Friend Paul, you will understand Paul much more thoroughly) The other reason is that it seems no one is listening anymore. Collectively we have retreated into our hardened silos and are very comfortable there. Let me step out of any silo and explain where I am. Hopefully, it is not a silo but a large green field with room for countless others to join.
There are three words that describe my position. The first one is Christian, but let me explain that a bit. In the New Testament Paul wrote a letter to the Corinthians. To put it mildly the Corinthians were a mess. They were divided, engaging in lawsuits with one another and were affected by sexual practices that harmed the community. In the midst of all of this Paul never stopped calling them Christian.
The Galatians were a different story altogether. They were devout, firm and very committed to the cause. After Paul left others came to Galatia and told them that to be Christian you not only needed faith, but you had to be circumcised as well, and avoid Red Lobster and bacon cheeseburgers as well. They enthusiastically responded, called the mohel and scheduled their adult circumcisions. That is commitment! Paul looked on their commitment and told them clearly they had abandoned the faith.
Many are surprised at this but Paul's reasoning was clear. One is Christian because of the death and resurrection of Jesus, and nothing else. As soon as anyone adds other requirements, they can be moral, they can be devout, and they can be committed, but they are no longer Christian. it seems to me we are again in the world of the Galatians. There are a number of voices that proclaim a number of requirements for the faith. You have to look a certain way, listen to certain music, or vote a certain way. A Christian must have the same political opinion as me. Any requirement other than faith in the death and resurrection of Jesus takes us away from this word, Christian.
In fact, one of the powerful statements that the church can make is when Jew and Gentile, male and female, Democrat and Republican can genuinely love and care in a way that surpasses all of these labels. When we do we proclaim to every earthly tyrant and despot that Jesus is Lord and not them, or their empty rhetoric that divides for their political gain. If Jesus is Lord, we do not need them.
My second word is Anyone. I am an Arminian - proudly. This is a description that many people do not recognize. It is from a man named Jacobus Arminius, who lived around the turn of the 17th century. After 100 years of Reformation, the church had made a hard turn toward Calvinism and its emphasis on the elect as objects of God's grace. This bothered Arminius and people heard a different message in his teaching and sermons. He ran afoul of the leaders of the movement so they questioned him about his teaching. When asked if he believed in the doctrine of Election he responded that he did. As a follow-up he was asked who comprised the Elect. His answer was simply "anyone who would believe."
This is where I stand as well. I believe anyone can benefit from grace. His grace is available for everyone, so anyone can access this grace. In recent years our leaders separated us between the Essential and the Non-Essential. This was profoundly arrogant and stupid. Everyone is essential. Every life bears the image of the God who created all of us. My second word is Anyone.
My third word is Spirit. This is a popular word today as most people want to describe themselves as spiritual. Just ask their previous four wives, and they will all say the same thing. I am not using Spirit in the amorphous, touchy-feely way that is so prevalent today, but in the historical, Christian sense. In Romans 7 Paul describes the struggle of anyone who seeks to live a good life by observing the rule book. If I check all the boxes, then I will know that I am living the good life. Paul details the struggle that we know intimately. If we know that we should not eat the brownie for dessert, it only makes us want the brownie more. Knowing what I shouldn't do doesn't make me good - it just makes me aware of where I fall short. In another letter Paul even stated that he kept every rule perfectly only to find that life did not flow from following the rulebook.
If following the rules does not make a difference, then what does? Paul follows the anguish of Romans 7 with his masterpiece of Romans 8. The answer is not more rules or better discipline but a daily walk with God' Spirit who seeks to live in us. We don't really live until God lives in us.
What does this Spirit do? Romans 8 is clear. The Spirit frees us from the entanglements that pride, anger, and selfishness create. If enables us to live in a way that is no longer characterized by our all too human traits. It enlivens us. The Spirit grants new life here, and promises us that no disease or tyrant will ever have the last word again. We will also experience the resurrection. And the Spirit empowers us to love, serve, and live in ways we otherwise could not.
These are my 3 words. When I was 21, I was ready to do battle and die on about 87 hills. My hills are few now, but these hills are mine. These words are mine. I want to live with these words - Christian. Anyone. Spirit.
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god-is-alive-ministry · 2 years ago
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DECISION;
DON'T YOU JUST HATE TO STOP YOUR DIRECTION IN YOUR LIFE TO MAKE A SUDDEN CHANGE WITHOUT ANY WARNING, AND THEN YOU ARE PUT IN A PLACE WHERE YOU HAVE TO MAKE A DECISION WHEN YOU HAVE NO DIRECTION TO GO IN AND YOU HAVE TO STEP OUT IN FAITH. I'M JUST LETTING YOU KNOW I HAVE BEEN THERE TO THIS POINT OF MAKING A DECISION WHEN I DON'T HAVE A CLUE OF WHAT TO DO NEXT..WELL, YOU CAN FALL TO PIECES OR GRAB YOUR BIBLE AND GET THE ANSWERS TO "WHAT DO I DO NEXT"? NO MONEY, NO SHELTER, AND DYING TOO. WITH NO WAY OUT IS WHAT THE SURGEON TOLD ME. NO ONE HAS EVER LIVED WITH YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES, I CAN DO SURGERY ON YOU BUT YOU WILL NOT COME OFF THE OPERATING TABLE ALIVE. WHOA, ANOTHER DECISION TO MAKE. DO I LET GO AND LET GOD OR WALK AWAY TO DIE ANYWAY THAT COULD TAKE YEARS FOR THIS 3.8-CENTIMETER TUMOR ON THE LEFT SIDE OF MY HEAD TO DESTROY ME? WELL, THESE WERE THE LAST DAYS OF MY TRUCKING DAYS. THE EMPLOYER TOOK MY LAST THREE TRIPS AND DIDN'T PAY ME AND LEFT ME OUT THERE TO MAKE IT ON MY OWN BECAUSE I TOLD THEM I WAS TOO ILL TO DRIVE THE TRUCK. SO I DIDN'T HAVE ANYWHERE TO GO AND NO MONEY, WAS DESTITUTE, AND I HEARD OF A HOMELESS SHELTER AND I WENT THERE AND TOLD THEM MY SITUATION SO THEY GAVE ME A BED TO SLEEP IN UNTIL I CHECKED INTO THE HOSPITAL TO HAVE SURGERY. FRANKLY, DEATH SEEMS TO BE THE RIGHT DECISION. I WAS GOING TO DIE WHICHEVER WAY I DID IT. SO I CALLED MY CHILDREN AND TOLD THEM GOODBYE, I AM DYING AND I HAVE NO WAY OUT. SO HERE COMES EVERY FAMILY MEMBER I HAVEN'T SEEN FOR YEARS AND COULDN'T CARE LESS. ANYWAY, MY CHILDREN TOOK ME TO RED LOBSTER FOR MY FINAL MEAL AND CHECKED ME INTO THE HOSPITAL. MY FAMILY HAD TO DRIVE FROM MISSOURI AND I WAS ALREADY ON THE OPERATING TABLE FOR 12 HOURS. WHEN I WAS IN RECOVERY MY OLDEST BROTHER CAME IN WITH MY MOM AND LOOKED AT ME AND SAID MOM SHE IS OK NO ONE COULD EVER KILL ANNE SHE IS TOO STUBBORN TO DIE AND WHEN SHE MAKES HER MIND UP TO DO SOMETHING SHE WON'T QUIT UNTIL SHE DOES IT. SO . I LIVED IN SPITE OF THE DOCTOR AND EVERYTHING THAT CAME MY WAY. WELL, AFTER THE FAMILY LEFT, MY CHILDREN MOVED ME INTO BELIEVE IT OR NOT, MY SON'S INLAW'S HOUSE TO RECUPERATE. IT TOOK A YEAR TO LEARN TO WALK AGAIN WITHOUT HOLDING ON TO THE WALL. BUT, WITH ALL THE INFORMATION THAT I HAD PREACHED ON THE ROAD DRIVING THE TRUCK FOR FREYMILLER TRUCKING I DIDN'T GIVE UP. JUST ANOTHER DECISION TO BE MADE. I GOT MY DISABILITY CHECK AND MOVED INTO MY OWN APARTMENT GOT A DIVORCE, AND STARTED MINISTERING AGAIN. MANY, MANY DECISIONS HAD TO BE MADE. BUT, WHENEVER THE DECISIONS CAME, I REACHED FOR MY BIBLE. AND PREACHED TO EVERYONE THAT WAS WITHIN HEARING DISTANCE. SO, I MADE ANOTHER DECISION ON HOW TO SET FREYMILLER IN THEIR PLACE SO I GOT AN ATTORNEY, AND FREYMILLER GOT TO PAY THE $ 200, OOO. HOSPITAL BILLS AND ALL THE DOCTORS' BILLS. NOT ENOUGH, I WENT TO THE DOT AND SHOWED THEM HOW FREMILLER WAS DRIVING ME TO KEEP FOUR LOG BOOKS TO MAKE ALL THE TRIPS I MADE FOR THEM. NOT ENOUGH FOR ME. FREYMILLER TRUCKING LOST MOST OF THEIR TRUCKS AND THE DOT WATCHED THEM LIKE A HAWK THEY SET UP ALL KINDS OF DOT-CHECKING AREAS AND FREYMILLER WAS PAYING FOR EVERY VIOLATIONS THEY CAUGHT THE TRUCKERS MAKING WITH EXTRA LOG BOOKS. ANOTHER DECISION TO BE MADE. THE DOCTOR FOUND TWO TUMORS ON MY BRAIN STEM, AND THEY WERE INOPERABLE SAYING IT WOULD BE MURDER.SO, I WENT TO A PRAYER MEETING AT A CHURCH I WENT TO AND THEY PRAYED AND I WENT BACK TO THE DOCTOR AND HE SAID THE TUMORS ARE GONE. WE HAVE THE MRI OF THERE THEY ARE AND THERE THEY ARE GONE. SO I WENT ON WITH MY MINISTRY, AND HERE I AM STILL ALIVE SERVING THE LORD IN ANY WAY I CAN. WAS IT EASY YOU SAY? NOPE, DECISIONS ARE LURKING AROUND TRYING TO GET ME TO STOP MINISTERING. FACE IT, EVERYONE IS GOING TO HAVE DECISIONS TO MAKE. BIG OR SMALL THEY ARE THERE. MY ADVICE TO YOU IS "PICK UP YOUR BIBLE AND GET THE NEEDED ANSWERS" AND SET BACK AND WAIT ON ANOTHER DECISION TO MAKE BECAUSE AS LONG AS SATAN IS FREE TO CAUSE HAVOC HE IS GOING TO DO EVERYTHING TO DESTROY YOU ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. IT IS UP TO YOU TO MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION. BE BLESSED.
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pettyrevenge-base · 3 years ago
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2 guys tried to turn me into a bet. I won.
So, I was dating a guy I had met at karaoke. We shall call him Ryan. He was good friends with the karaoke host, whom we shall call Jerry. I worked as the only female bouncer at the same bar they ran karaoke. (they needed a person that could keep an eye out for trouble in the girls bathroom, because there had been a sexual assault in there before they hired me).
Ryan thought that I had that day off, but I came in to my work anyway because it was a fun place if you weren't working lol. The idiot had brought another girl there for dinner. I sweetly introduced myself to her, asked how long they'd been dating. She said a couple months. I warned her to be careful with him. She asked what I meant. I said "ask him where he was Thur, if he says anywhere other than "inside me" he's a liar" then I turned and walked out, smiling as I heard her start screaming at him.
So, I have a very good friend come in from out of town. They do not know him, but I've told friend all about this guy. Friend hung out on the karaoke side during my next shift, where I was working on the dancefloor side and bathrooms. Friend was the type that sat quietly in the corner, and got ignored. The true "fly on the wall" type person.
So, Jerry is giving Ryan crap about getting caught cheating. Ryan says I'm too smart to be fooled, and Jerry says (correctly) that Ryan was a fool to bring the other girl here. Ryan says "it's not like you could get one over on her if you tried" which led to them making a bet. Ryan would apologize to me and try to win me back, while still sleeping with other girls. Jerry would simply have to try to get me in bed. The first one that could get me in bed, without being faithful, was the winner of a $50 bet.
Now normally, there's no way in hell I would have ever dated Jerry. I knew he was a skeeze. Also, no way in hell I'd take Ryan back. But, my friend heard the whole thing and told me about their bet, so we hatched a plan.
Over the next several weeks, I let BOTH guys wine and dine me. Take me out, buy me nice dinners (I had a lot of Outback and Red Lobster those weeks). Buy me little gifts and flowers. Basically both of them were full on ass-kissing mode, trying to get into my pants but not look too desperate so I wondered what was up. You'd think that after 2 weeks of me not even KISSING them, they'd realize I was on to their BS.
So, after keeping a notebook of when and where they took me, how much they spent on me, etc- I arranged the next date. Back where it all began, our bar. I asked Jerry to meet me there at 10. I asked Ryan to meet me there at 10. I brought my notebook that showed the total of how much money they had spent on me, trying to win this stupid bet. I told them I knew everything and they were both my puppets.
Jerry had the nerve to try to deny everything. Ryan just laughed and said "told you she was smart" and admitted everything. He apologized, and gradually we became friends again over many years. (never dated again). Jerry to this day swears there was no bet. He just can't admit that I won. :D
Source: reddit.com/r/pettyrevenge
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aftgficrec · 3 years ago
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Random Rec
Here’s a random rec for a quick beach read featuring fluffy/angsty andreil, ‘the optimal condition (for birds to take flight).’
It opens with Andrew all hot and bothered (but not like that) arriving in the steamy Maldives to join the Foxes celebrating Aaron and Katelyn as they renew their vows. 
The twins are ill-suited for tropical conditions and are mostly lobster red sweaty messes, but —  rejoice! — beefy Andrew supremacy reigns when he trades his black jeans and tee for “dark shorts and a black tank that does everything for his shoulders.” Dr. Katelyn lets her hair down and is glowing and happy and gorgeous. You know who else is gorgeous? Kevin. And a scarred, blue-eyed stranger who is sassy and...interesting. 
Island Boy Neil is soon shadowing the group, and Andrew starts saying yes to kite surfing and snorkeling and photos with his friends. Time grows short as it is wont to do. Attraction quickly builds to yearning, as Neil seems fated to stay half a world away while Andrew must return to his job and everyday life. Can Neil be freed from his paradise prison and the shadow of a mafia past so they can surf into the sunset? Have faith, dear reader. - A
“I’m not a hallucination...” Andrew says.
“Maybe I am.”
“You’re the realest person I ever met,” Andrew tells him. “You’re not nothing. You’re so fucking real.”
Their foreheads touch, their noses brush and they breath the same air. 
Andrew’s chest feels full of the sea and salt and longing for something he knows he can’t have.
the optimal condition (for birds to take flight) by scribbleb_red [Rated T, 5938 Words, Complete, 2021]
On a tiny Maldivian island, during his brother's stag do, Andrew Minyard meets Neil Josten - a kite-surfing enigma who claims to be on the run from the law.
tw: alcohol, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: implied/referenced torture
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deviliciousdev · 4 years ago
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MBTI✨(pt 4 ) The Advocate's Lemon 🍋🥴🚫 The Brunch of A Series of Unfortunate Events 👀
infj (the advocate)
&
entj (the commander) x intp (the logician) couple
&
infp (the mediator) x entp (the debater) couple
--------------------------------
[all + lemon, eating brunch, at a nice restaurant and private table over looking bay🥂🍳🥓🥞🍽🌊🌤]
infp: [fuming at lemon] you have to brush a labradoodle! they get matts!
lemon: then what's the point of a groomer ahaha i mean right [looks around laughing]
infj: 🥴
infp: i- [stops themselves, chugs mimosa]
lemon: so intp, what do you do??
intp: [eating breakfast mac n cheese] i work for a biotech corp.
lemon: [sarcastically] oh right the "bioweapon" you made. so other than a pathological liar what do you do...
intp: [small smile of disbelief at entp] no, i actually do. i'm a microbiologist.
lemon: [overly sarcastic and goofy tone] ohhh i'm sure you arrrrreee. and i'm a "rocket scientist".
intp: [waves hand in disbelief, shakes head, and continues to eat]
lemon: oh, oh, and i forgot you're in a "relationship" with entj. ha! [takes a drink of water]
infj: [looks at intp as to say, up the couple stuff with entj] [intp rolls eyes but shrugs and nods]
lemon: [to infj] is your french toast good, pookie bear?
infj: [nod and smiles at lemon with mouth full of food]
entp: [quietly makes vomit sound]🤮 [infp snickers]
intp: [grabs fresh mimosa from tray] [to entj] want another mimosa... uh, poopy mare?
infj: 😬
everyone: 🤨🧐🤔
intp: [looks down, eyes shifting from side to side] hmmm... [low tone]... that can't be right...
entj: [pulls mimosa out of intp's hand and chugs it]🥂
[awkard silence]
lemon: so, entj how long have you and infj been sleeping together?
infj: [chokes on water] 😵
infp: 😳
entp: 😀
entj: the only person at this table that i HAVE ever and WILL ever sleep with is intp.
intp: sweet.
infp: [now tipsy or more so] aha! [stares into space for a moment, holding mimosa] i'm so drunk...
lemon: [staring at entj] i see the way you two share looks, little sneaky sex looks!
entj: [throws hands in the air] ugh!
entp: sneaky sex looks?
infj: So-n-so, there was and is nothing going on between entj and i.
infp: [staring at entp leaning with chin on their palm] i'll give you sneaky sex.
lemon: see! ur all sex freaks! AND if we're being real, probably alcoholics! no one even prayed before we ate!!
intp: [snorts with laughter]
lemon: AND you want me to believe that entj is seriously with [wags finger at intp] someone like THAT!
entj: woah! watch it bitch. [a finger pointing at lemon]
infj: 😬
intp: oookkk ok i'll end all this rn. [getting out phone 📱]
entp: [quietly] ooohhh it's happening, this is such a train wreck. i love brunch.
intp: [shows lemon phone vertically. loud moans emit from phone📱]
infj: 🤦
lemon: 😳
infp: [leaning back to look at video] wow you two look great, so tan!
intp: i know right. 😏 [ends video and puts phone down 📱]
lemon: ok. fine. all that proves is that you two are sex addicts. And more proof that entj seduced infj!
intp: oh. my. god.
lemon: I WILL NOT BELIEVE SOMEONE LIKE ENTJ, A TALL GORGEOUS CORPORATE BOSS WOULD EVER ACTUALLY LOVE OR STAY FAITHFUL TO A WEIRD, LITTLE, UNIBOMBER FREAKAZOID, LIKE INTP!
entj: THAT'S IT!😤 [leaps over table knocking glasses and plates onto the ground, grabs lemon by the hair]
infp: SAVE THE MIMOSA'S!
lemon: [emitting ugly high pitch scream]😵😱
infj: [tries to pull entj off of lemon. entj: [shoves infj backward, infj flips over their chair]
infj: [struggling to get up] INTP A LITTLE HELP PLEASE?!
intp: [looking complete other way] OMG THE BIRDS! ITS HAPPENING! [flinching from seagulls flying onto deck attracted to the spilled food] 😱🕊
infp: oh no. i don't feel good.🤢
entp: [gets up to help with the altercation]🏃/🏃‍♀️
lemon: [still screeching and flaying]😫
entj: [pulling hair and letting out a feral battle cry]🤬
infp: [throws up on table]🤮
[entp crashes into waiter approaching with a flaming bananas foster, table catches fire, because of all the spilled champagne]💥🍽🔥
intp: [shuddering and using potted plant to swipe at attacking seagulls]😖🪴🕊
infj: [breaks entj and lemon up]
lemon: [hair all insane face red, grabs large plate]
entj: bring it on, bitch! [both hands out in front waving toward them]
lemon: [screech's and throws plate as hard as she can]🤬🍽
[plate flies into restaurant and hits lobster tank, glass cracks but holds] 🍽💥🦞
all: [gasp]🤭😶
[glass cracks and giant tank bursts. water and lobsters flood the tables around the tank.💥🦞🌊patrons scream and run.]
infj: [as seagulls leave from commotion, and fire on table goes out] THAT'S IT!!! I ASKED FOR ONE MEAL AND YOU PEOPLE CANT EVEN DO THAT!! [turns to lemon] AND YOU!! YOU CRAZY BITCH!! THE ONLY FREAK HERE IS YOU!! THESE PEOPLE ARE TRAIN WRECKS, BUT THEY ARE MY TRAIN WRECKS! AND I'D RATHER HAVE BRUNCH WITH THEM EVERYDAY THAN SPEND ANOTHER SECOND WITH YOU!
lemon: 😱 YOU HAVE MADE A BIG MISTAKE INFJ! YOU WILL NEVER SEE ME AGAIN!
infj: WELL ONE CAN ONLY HOPE!
lemon: 🤭😡[gasps and storms off]
infj: [slumps down in chair]😞
[Manager comes up. He looks at the chaotic mess. makes a small painful squeal sound. His hands out shaking]
manager: who- who is responsible for- for... this!?
all: [look at one another][at the same time] So-n-so.
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nonobadcat · 4 years ago
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Yandere All For One X F! Reader - A Hypnotic Nightmare: Chapter 26 Excerpt
Story rating: Explicit
TW: Rape/Noncon. GORE (non-reader directed). Highly mentally and sexually abusive relationship. This story is absolutely not for minors and readers should consult the warnings/tags at the top before reading.
Read the entire story at: Archive of Our Own
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"Lobo!"  Shigaraki called, waving to the man in front of him. "I had hoped you'd be by to talk at some point."
Beyond your companion stood a two and a half meter tall manbeast made of ripping muscles which strained against a torn white wife-beater. He had pointed white ears, claws hands, and a large bushy tail which swished back and forth behind his jeans. As Shigaraki strolled towards him, the ears tilted back and the man bared his fangs at the blond.
"You think you can be so casual with me after what you've done!" The wolfman snarled.
Shigaraki cocked his head and smiled pleasantly at the clawed stranger. "You'll need to be more specific. I've been busy this week."
"Don't play games!" The wolfman sneered as the fur on his tail bristled. "You killed my friends!"
"Did I?" Shigaraki rubbed his chin. "I don't recall. They must have been rather forgettable if I did."
Lobo's eyes ran red as his high blood pressure caused the veins there to throb. "ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW?!"
Shigaraki shrugged. "Well I've been on my honeymoon so I had more important things to remember." He shook his head. "After all, women can be hard to please. It takes a lot of effort to do things right."
Lobo gritted his teeth. His hands were shaking. "So you just killed my men on a whim and bounced to see your whore?!"
"Oh no," Shigaraki waved at the car behind him. "This one is a homemaker. The last one was the prostitute." He frowned. "And you ought not to criticize them for doing their jobs. Both are very old, venerable professions."
Lobo glanced at the car. The pale yellow met your astonished ones. He snorted and kicked his foot back, tossing some loose gravel from the road like a dog burying its waste. "Yeah, whatever. Just looks like a generic cumdumpster to me."
All For One's face settled into a cold frown. He stood up straight. His fingers twitched against the wool of his suit pants. "I suggest you take care how you refer to my wife."
"Yeah, well you should take care not to piss me off!" Lobo fired back. "You might think you're all cocky and cool cause you wiped out my underlings with the little bunny hop plant trick number but your ass ain't so tough here!" The wolfman gestured to the walls around you. "Ain't no trees or sky." He grinned with a mouth full of razor-sharp fangs. "Just you and me and all the cement we need to bury you with our friends."
Just at the edge of the light, you saw a group of twenty shadows collecting in the din of the tunnel. Most were carrying guns or had gun like quirks, and one appeared to be secreting grenades from his hands.
"Oh no…" The driver whined, scratching his head and the damage to the interior of the car. "I just got the holes fixed from the last time. He really needs to have more faith in my defensive driving." Without much ado, the brunette crawled through the window dividing the front and back before grinning sheepishly at you. "Sorry m'am, but the closer we are the stronger the shield I can make. The car is bulletproof but Master'll kill me if I let you get hit by any stray shrapnel."
You stared in wide eyed horror as the large group formed an arch around your husband. "Is he going to be all right?"
The driver waved off your concern with a sigh. "Oh he'll be fine. It's the tunnel I'm worried about."
You raised an eyebrow. "The tunnel?"
“That guy with the grenades could collapse this thing right on top of our heads.” The driver crossed his arms and nodded sternly. “Not a real smart quirk to be using in this situation.”
“Oh…” you murmured, gazing at the group in front of you through the glass.
All For One sneered at the men down the tunnel. “Bullets and explosives? Really? How unoriginal.”
Lobo raised his hand. “I’m not one for drama. I prefer the simple things.” As the men raised their weapons into firing position, the wolf grinned cockily. “Any last words before we waste you and the fuck toy?”
Your husband's body tensed. He raised a hand and scratched a spot behind his ear.
"Just a brief question: do you have an epitaph picked out, Lobo?"
As soon as All For One's fingers touched the skin, the driver’s eyes went wide and he lunged to shut the car door. It slammed shut, the sound echoing like a clap of thunder in the dim tunnel.
"Shit! Now that idiot's gone and done it!”
He threw his hands out and a glowing box formed around you and he. His eye twitched as a second cube encased the car and then a third cube appeared around that. You watched sweat drip down his brow two more barriers appeared: one directly behind the men with guns and one behind your husband.
“Just my luck that some moron goes and ruins a perfectly nice vacation!”
“I thought you said the car was bulletproof?” you asked as the driver shoved your head down.
The drive grinned at you before covering your body with his. “It’s not the bullets I’m trying to stop. I need multiple air gaps to stop the heat.”
“The heat?”
All at once there was a blast of white that engulfed the area where the villains were standing. Despite the barriers around you, you noticed the temperature in the car rising dramatically. It was then that you heard a high pitched whining noise. You clapped your hands over your ears, trying to keep the whistling shriek from splitting your head open. As you winced a second sound reached your ears.
It sounded like screams.
You lifted your head to see the swirling white mist wrapped behind the barrier. As it started to dissipate, you could see Shigaraki . His shirt was drenched, clinging to his muscles like gossamer robes made for angels. With his hair plastered to his head and his skin a rosy pink, he was more than a heart-thumping sight to behold. You gulped down the arousal building in your chest and looked away from Wet-Shirt-Contest Shigaraki before your judgement could get any more impaired.
The walls of the tunnel beyond the barrier were dripping. The whitewash was rumpled and appeared to be all but peeling off the cinder blocks. The tar on the road was liquid and sticky. The plastic lights looked slightly melted around the edges.
As your gaze shifted, you caught sight of some lumps laying on the pavement. Most of them were flat on the ground, curled into balls but one was stretched out and twitching. You saw a blister covered lobster red hand with peeling fur groping in the open air. The skin was exfoliating in large yellow rolls and small amounts of blood seeped from the open sores. As he clawed at the ground, dragging himself forward, you realized the creature before you was Lobo.
“My… you’re still alive? That steam was pressurized between the barriers so it was much hotter than normal. Why, it must have been nearly 150℃!” All For One said, stalking forward towards the scalded carcass of a man. “You are a rather determined fool aren’t you?”
Read the rest of this chapter on Archive of Our Own
@shigashigashig​ - Hope it was worth the wait.
@allforoneswife​ - This is your enabler calling. Come get you some wet shirt contest AFO.
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theiceandbones · 4 years ago
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Nova Scotia Bones: a brief listing of famous haunts in Canada’s ocean playground
Nova Scotia is a lobster-shaped granite peninsula that juts out into the North Atlantic on Canada’s east coast. It’s ancient, it’s damp, it’s rocky, and it’s home. It’s also wildly haunted. The impenetrable granite bedrock that we live upon seems to act as its own tomb for the energies of those who departed their earthly vessels on the volatile shores and in the coniferous boreal interior. Or, perhaps, it is our own maritime culture, one that is freckled with memento mori, that adds fuel to these legends that have been passed on through the ages. A culture that lives and dies by the sea is no stranger to tragedy and haunts, eventually one learns to live alongside them. For better or for worse. 
I’ve collected a few ghost stories that have stood out to me over the years. When one grows up in Nova Scotia these are a select few that everyone speaks of, some may be lesser known but still thoroughly chilling. These will be arranged in order of popularity. 
1. The Young Teazer The Young Teazer was an American privateering schooner who, in June of 1813, would find herself in the waters of Mahone Bay being pursued by the British fleet. Her commander, a Lieutenant Johnston, knew that if he were to be captured he would most certainly hang, and knowing this, he ordered his crew to abandon ship in a major way- the Teazer was exploded, all onboard except for eight perished in the blast. It is now a well-known local legend that on a warm summer’s night, one may still see the reflection of a ship on fire in Mahone Bay’s quiet waters. 
2. The forerunner It’s just now occurred to me that I cannot possibly continue without speaking of the forerunner. This phenomenon features extensively within Nova Scotian folklore and is a key aspect of maritime superstition. A forerunner is an omen of death. It may take the shape of the doomed themselves, their scent, a light, an overwhelming sensation of dread directly linked to the individual, a falling photograph of or other object related to the individual, or one’s name being called by the individual. When expecting company, a traditional maritime host will set the large Pyrex kettle on the stove, always containing at least half a dozen teabags, to boil, but sometimes the recently-expected guest may not arrive- ever again. Here are a few selected tales of forerunners from Nova Scotia’s past. 
Anyone who is familiar with the series Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark will remember the story of “The Thing.” What they may not know, however, is that this story is based on a real event which happened in Victoria Beach, NS. A Mr. Thorne and his friend, Joe, were out walking at night when they spied behind a neighbour’s house a long, spindly, pale creature dressed in a white shirt, black trousers and black braces peering back at them. Well they had no idea what this creature could be and so they ran back to Joe’s house after it had given them a right spook. Eventually the pair returned only to discover that now the creature was standing atop the fence in the neighbour’s yard, a fence so old it crumbled under a person’s touch, and that’s when it was decided they were done chasing this thing for one evening. 
Years later, Joe took ill with consumption and died. Mr. Thorne, his ever-faithful friend, had stayed up with him right up until the very end. Joe’s condition had wasted him away so powerfully he was nary more than skin and bone by the time he’d passed. Mr. Thorne through the years had been hesitant to tell this story at all, for a good reason. Because, he says, toward the end of Joe’s life, lying in bed in his graveclothes, he looked just like The Thing.
In Liverpool, NS, a Mrs. Viola Oickle was seated at the kitchen table playing cards with her friends when she looked up and in the window, plain as day, was her Uncle Ernie. “There’s Uncle Ernie” she said, they’d heard the latch on the door open, but Ernie never showed. After cards she decided she’d go round to Ernie’s house to check on him, and there he was, peeling apples on his front step fit as a fiddle. However, mere hours later, Ernie had died of a heart attack at his home. 
Marion Bridge in Cape Breton is home to a wealth of ghost stories, of course the forerunner is one of these. In addition to one’s apparition, three knocks may also be an omen. A Mrs. MacGillivray tells the story of her mother waiting up one night for her father to come home when she heard the sound of a wagon being pulled by horses up the road. They stopped, then came three knocks at the door- which was strange, but her mother figured he may need a hand with something outside. Looking out, she realised no one was there at all. Of course she knew what three knocks meant and feared the worst for her husband. Eventually he returned home in his usual health, but her mother was still confused. A while later the body of a man was found up a nearby road and the men who’d discovered it stopped at the house to change horses at night. They knocked three times on the door, exactly the same sequence of events which transpired when her mother had heard the knocks before. 
3. Treasure The province has a storied history of pirates and privateering, so it comes as no surprise that stories of buried treasure are quite popular. As superstition has it, when digging for treasure, one must not speak until the task is done. If a word is spoken, the treasure will never be found. The spirits of pirates go to great lengths to ensure this, one tale tells of a man digging for a hidden treasure with his wife and young daughter. His wife pipes up, “oh would you look at those monkeys!” This is eastern Canada, as such there are no monkeys native to the area. Unsurprisingly, there were no monkeys to be found, and the treasure itself was never uncovered. Speaking of pirates
4. Black Rock Beach/Maugers Beach In Halifax’s early days as the port city it remains today, it was no stranger to pirates. Pirates, however, were not so welcome in Halifax as one may assume. When a pirate was caught in Halifax, they would be hanged and displayed in an iron cage at Black Rock Beach at the harbour’s mouth, or at Maugers (pronounced locally as Major’s) Beach on McNab’s Island a little further out. This is how the latter gained its name as Dead Man’s Beach. 
5. Other phantom ships Nova Scotia’s ties to the sea are a major part of its cultural superstition. From “red sky at night” to “never sail if you see a forerunner,” seafaring superstitions are etched into the fabric of life around here. It comes as no surprise, then, that there are so many stories of ghost ships in the mix. One such story comes from 1874, an experience of a Captain Hatfield from Fox River, NS as he was sailing from Cuba to New York. Asleep in his cabin one night, he felt three taps on his shoulder and a voice urging him, “keep her off half a point.” He figured this was the mate or another of his officers, but they each assured him it was not them. He felt the tapping and heard the voice again. As he was growing annoyed, he got up to look around and saw a man climbing up the ladder but was not dressed like the others onboard. Nevertheless, he got up and gave the order to keep the ship off half a point. When morning came, a wreck was spotted half a point off course of his ship, and onboard came Captain Amesbury of the schooner D. Talbot, his wife, child, and his crew. Captain Hatfield recounted the story of the night before to the captain and his wife, to which the wife informed him the man he saw was her father who had passed ten years prior. 
A story from Seabright of a fishing vessel that was lost in a sou-easter tells of a captain who’d not turn back as the other boats did, but instead dared the lord to stop him from staying behind. The ship was lost, of course, and for ages onwards sailors would recount seeing a bright light at night that disappeared during the day. It would tack when the respective vessel tacked, but no one ever saw the shape of the boat itself- just its light. But, as sailors do say, one can feel a ship just as one can feel a person nearby. 
6. St. Paul’s face in the window This one dates to the time of the Halifax Explosion which occurred on the 6th of December 1917. St. Paul’s Church is the oldest building in Halifax, its foundation having been laid in the year of the city’s founding in 1749.  As legend has it, the deacon of the church was standing in the window parallel to the Narrows of the harbour when the French munitions ship, Mont Blanc, exploded. His profile remains in the window to this day and can be seen via Argyle Street. 
7. The Black Window House Another Halifax legend, the Black Window House on Robie Street has a long history of superstition. It was built in 1840 for the first elected mayor of Halifax, William Caldwell. It is said to be haunted because of its infamous black window. Local legend states that once a man peered in the window and saw witches dancing their dance of death on the verandah. When the witches caught him spying, they turned the window black. 
8. The Town Clock One of Halifax’s most iconic landmarks is the Town Clock on Citadel Hill. This is one of the few surviving round structures designed by the Duke of Kent during his visit to Halifax in the late 18th century. It is said that before the clock was constructed, there existed a well near the site where it stands today. A young girl was reportedly playing near this well when she fell in and died. Her spirit is said to remain in the clock tower to this day. 
9. Citadel Hill No discussion of Nova Scotian haunts is complete without discussing Citadel Hill. The Halifax Citadel is today a national historic site, however in the past it was used as a fully-operational military fortification and is one of the best-remaining examples of a star fortress worldwide. Ghost stories from the Hill are many and varied, and some workers have reported seeing strange phenomena themselves such as footprints behind locked metal grates. In the month of October, ghost tours are given by costumed interpreters at the site where famous stories are recounted. Some guests report their hand being held by a smaller, invisible hand, others talk of seeing a ghostly man in the uniform of the 78th Highlanders Regiment walking the grounds only to disappear. It is worth noting that the Citadel never once fired a shot in anger. 
10. The Five Fishermen This popular (and pricey) Halifax restaurant serves up fine dining and spirits...not always of the alcoholic variety. Restaurant staff over the years have reported cutlery flying off of tables, seeing apparitions in the washrooms turning the taps on and off, doors closing on their own, and hearing their name called when no one is around. The form of a grey figure is also said to wander down the staircase. 
11. The gallows For a time after Halifax’s founding, a gallows was set up on the corner of what is now Lower Water and George Streets. Public executions were a spectacle that could be viewed by all townspeople of all ages. According to local legend, on a clear night the ghost of a hanged man is said to be seen swinging by his neck in the spot where the old gallows used to stand. 
12. Dagger Woods I cannot stress enough how creepy and unsettling this area is. In northern Antigonish County there is a forest known as Dagger Woods. In this forest, there is said to live a demon known as the Hidey Hinder who steals unsuspecting visitors to the underworld, the person is never seen or heard from again, supposedly vanishing into thin air. People travelling through the woods report hearing strange and frightening cries that they cannot place, and, understandably, avoid the area afterwards. The woods are the subject of a song by the same name by Nova Scotian folk metal band, The Stanfields. 
13. Peggy’s Cove Peggy’s Cove is by far one of Nova Scotia’s most popular tourist destinations. As a lifelong resident of Nova Scotia, I encourage you to visit this beautiful point but please, PLEASE, stay off the black rocks for god’s sake. Anyway, the ghost who is lucky enough to live here is, of course, named Margaret. The story goes that Margaret and her husband settled here after a shipwreck claimed the lives of their children. Margaret was heartbroken, and so her husband decided to cheer her up. He made his way onto the rocks where Margaret would often sit and lament her lost children and performed a dance for her, but it would turn out even worse- he slipped and fell to his death. In a fit of agony, Margaret threw herself off the rocks and into the sea, and her ghost is said to haunt the rocks of Peggy’s Point to this day.
14. Caledonia Mills, or Mary Ellen’s Spook Farm Back in 1922, the MacDonald family lived on a farm in Caledonia Mills situated in Antigonish County. Their adopted daughter, named Mary Ellen, was not held in high regard. A series of fires that had taken place during the winter devastated the family, and Mary Ellen was said to be at the root of them; it was believed she was born of an evil spirit. When she denied these accusations, she was sent to live in an asylum. Her spirit still resides in her farm, and to any unlucky visitor who’d like to bring back a souvenir, they might find that mysterious fires start to ignite in their own home. Best to leave the farm in one piece.
15. Horton’s Cove This is not one that’s widely known to many, however it is a story very personal to myself. On a spot of land in Guysborough County, the remains of a young boy who died in the early 20th century are buried. The grave is unmarked and the boy’s cause of death is unknown. That being said, his presence can be felt in both the field and the hills around where his resting place is said to be, and trust me when I say there is no feeling quite as unnerving. 
16. Cole Harbour Poor Farm/Bissett Road Asylum In the 1920s there existed a mental asylum in a quiet part of Cole Harbour, outbound toward the harbour itself. The building is no longer there, said to have burnt to the ground in a fire, however the spirits of its residents can be felt in the vacant lot on the hill where it used to stand. Across the street on the edge of a sprawling field is a small fenced cemetery containing ten unmarked white crosses. It is rumoured that these graves house the remains of children who used to live in the asylum, though it is more likely that these graves were intended for adult residents. It is not yet known whose remains these are. 
Dealings with the paranormal and superstition is a way of life for many in Nova Scotia. It is our maritime history and culture which largely feed these beliefs, whether one believes in them is entirely up to the individual themselves. One thing that isn’t so easy to shake, though, is the sensation that there’s something in the trees or that field over there. Say, what’s on the water? 
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