#sweetheart... hah... Hahaha... H

[6okuto]

AKAASHI !!!

thought of the day turned unstructured blurb bc I feel bad for not posting anyone other than atsumu lately (and bc my next post is going to be atsumu again LMAO):

introverted “black cat energy” reader that tries to come off as intimidating and kind of cold in public, who’s not very into PDA, and akaashi who knows it’s all for show solely bc he lives with you and knows what you’re like 90% of the time. especially when you’re recharging from a social outing.

“you’re so warm, keiji,” you mumble as you nudge your head under his chin.

his hands are pressed gently against your shoulders, keeping you at arms length as you try to nuzzle your face against his body like an actual cat. he laughs and angles his head back on the pillow and away from you when you accidentally sigh too heavily against a particularly sensitive part of his neck.

“and you are very wiggly, sweetheart. just relax with me, didn’t you say you wanted to recharge your battery?“

you groan and struggle against his arms, trying to get closer. “I am recharging! let me near you,” you whine.

he laughs again (because when isn’t he laughing with you around? you make it so easy to let loose.) and retorts, “recharging with what, static electricity?”

you just giggle and take advantage of his loosening grip, finally flopping down and pressing kisses all over his face, nudging your nose against his and most importantly, pressing yourself tightly against him so he doesn’t have the chance to push you away again. “with affection, smartass.”

the laughter dies down and you stare at each other for a bit, a tender silence taking over the moment. akaashi’s gotten good at reading your expressions- after all, that’s how you prefer to show your deep, unwavering devotion for him in situations you would never feel comfortable doing any of this in. and right now your expression is telling him that you want to be held, loved, cared for after a long day.

and of course he’ll do that for you. why wouldn’t he?he moves his hands again, but this time one caresses your back and the other strokes the bridge of your nose. “you’re not so scary when you’re beginning for attention.”

but of course he has to tease you a bit first, that’s non negotiable.

your jaw drops and he smiles, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “keiji!”

idk I just think he gets so smiley around you :((( and he absolutely wouldn’t mind you being less affectionate in public for whatever reasons you have!! he just wants you to be comfortable!!! and he knows you’re probably going to return it tenfold when you both get home to make up for missing his touch 🫶🏻

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@6okuto I hope I didn’t butcher your husband too badly, it’s been FOREVERRRR since I’ve written for him oh my god 😭 the return of my akaashi era is upon us y’all……. he’s so fun to write 😭🫶🏻

[duchess08]

Fresh from the start

Hi!

Hahahaha, ini mungkin ranting pertama gue disini tapi ini penting buat future me untuk selalu hati-hati dalam memulai hubungan. 

Anyway, jadi hari ini A ulang tahun. H-2 dia ultah, gue berantem karena dia minum terus H-1 gue sibuk pedo dan akhirnya kita berniat buat telfonan dan H-1 jam ada urusan di pedo sehingga gue baru bisa nelfon 10 menit sebelum jam 12 disana yang mana dia ga jawab karena katanya sih ibunya nelfon. Akhirnya gue kasih wish gue yang btw udah gue prepare dari seminggu sebelumnya dan gue blg kalau gue ngantuk dan capek dan bakal gue telfon besok. Karena gue gaenak karena tau ultah tuh big deal banget buat dia, jadi ya akhirnya setengah jam kemudian gue telfon dan diangkat. Awalnya sih keliatan dia bt trs ya normal2 saja setelah gue ucapin selamat ultah dan dia tb2 bilang lagi “jadi kita pacaran lah ya ini? Iya engga sih?” trs yaudah gue jawab sama seperti sebelumnya “nanti kita bahas ya pas ketemu.”

Teruus udah everything’s fine. Jam 9 dia nelfon gue, jam 12 dia nelfon gue lagi. Ohya dan jam 9an itu, gue liat A emg post story baru tapi gue ga liat karena ya takut viewersnya masih dikit gitu dan gue takut react towards itu post. Jadi udah lah tuh, jam 12 video call pun masih normal, engga ada aneh-aneh.. Terus akhirnya jam 2, gue buka lah itu story dan jeng-jeng, isi video call dia dengan seorang perempuan yang megang kue dengan caption “gotta wake up early for this birthday surprise. Big thanks sweetheart” hahahahaha. 

The second I found out, gue cm kepikir buat telfon Dinda dan bilang itu. Pas liat, jujur gue kayak “hah apaan nih?” trs yaudah langsung kepikiran saat itu untuk mengudahkan. Gue bahkan ga kepikir untuk confront, nanya2 gitu karena gimana ya, dengan gue confront tuh berarti gue peduli gitu loh. Gue marah2 malah bikin capek karena gue bukan lagi di marah. Gue cuma kepikir “okay, he’s really not a good man. Thank God i found this sooner, so okay think how we better end things up?” 

Setelahnya ya, gue telfon Dinda, Anjing2in dikit karena ya gue speechless lah, kesel juga pasti dan gue lgs chat A bilang “congrats, Dadaah” dan gue block. Dinda bilang :rez, marah dikit aja biar lo lega” trs ya gue unblock lagi bilang “ya gue gatau sih salah gue apaan tapi ya gue bersyukur gue ga buang2 waktu lagi sama lo dan well, lo juga ga worth it amat sih.” dan dia berlagak bingung dan minta waktu 5 menit lah, bisa jelasin lah dll. 

Gimana ya, ada memang sedikiiiiit di otak gue pengen denger aja ini excusenya apaan masalahnya udah jelas banget gitu loh. Gamungkin sodara, apa2an pake sweetheart hahaha. Tapi gue mikir, kl kayak gini di reel on, ya makin rumit gak sih. Bisa aja gue maafin who knows, atau bisa aja si A ngomong yang menyakitkan hati. Gue rasa apapun obrolannya ya useless karena gaada outcome yang gue inginkan selain udahan. Even dia bingung lah, apalah, tetep aja shay, you’re not an option. Don’t let yourself to be a choice, because you are a priority. Terus dalam rentang waktu 10 menit, gue berhasil blok seluruh media sosial dia (WA, FB, IG, nomor) dan dia attempt buat sms dan telfon gue 2x tapi gue reject dan gue diemin. 

I don’t want to give him a pleasure of closure, or explanation or even a chance, I don’t want to give him a pleasure of seeing me down, because he ain’t deserve it. Jujur, gue juga kaget karena kok gue ga sedih gitu ya, even merenung gitu. Cuma ya itu, mungkin emang deep down gue tau that he’s not a good one, he has a lot of red flags, cuma gue masih mencari deal breakernya dan akhirnya hari ini ditunjukkan deal breakernya dan bener-bener deal breaker sih wkwk kayak udah jelas. Mau dia minta maaf, mau gue pun maafin, tetep aja gue gamau sama cowok selingkuh, even gue dijadiin options aja gamau sorry. 

Ya mungkin juga gue anggap kalau gue pernah jahat sama orang, jadi ini balasannya. Atau ya seperti alasan-alasan gue sebelumnya yang mau cari mantan biar gue bisa tau rasanya pacaran dan heartbreak dan how to build yourself again. Ternyata jauuuuh banget bedanya sama anak SMP, dimana gue nangis-nangis merasa gue kok ga pantes dll. Tenyata, when you love and respect yourself, when someone do mean things to you, you won’t let yourself in misery because you know, you have so much better things to think about and you’re not going to steep that low. Selain itu, gue bersyukur sih karena alhamdulillah, even gue udah sekayak pacaran itu sama A, gue gapernah bilang love you. Sayang pun cuma sekali itu pun di video call, gapernah on text. Jadi setidaknya, gue ternyata bisa menjaga kata-kata itu buat nanti orang yang lebih tepat. 

Gangerti sih sampe sekarang mana bagian buaya lain yang dia lakukan hahaha karena kayaknya gue emang segapeduli itu, jadi entah apa kebohongan yang pernah dia bilang sama gue. Ya kasian si A, orangtua udah berumur, udah pengen nikah tahun depan, tapi masih aja jahatin anak orang. Gue padahal bukan yang masalah kalau dia state dia gamau sama gue atau seeing another girl, cuma yaa itu. Ya gitulah ya, it’s his business lah, not mine. Masih untung banget gue belum mengorbankan apa-apa, even material stuffs, HAHA bagus lah gue belum keluar apa-apa buat hadiah dia. 

But beside of that, gue bersyukur kok gue ketemu dia. I mean this is the most intense and serious relationship that I’ve ever been into, Mungkin bisa diitung kayak punya mantan kali ya hahaha, tapi ya beneran. Bersyukur udah ketemu dia, bersyukur udah banyak belajar dan overcome my issue karena yaa I gain a lot of experience sih and lesson tentunya, dan yang terakhir, bersyukur karena sudah ditunjukkan dalam waktu sesingkat ini. 

Thank you, A for coming into my life. I hope all ends well lah ya buat lo. Semoga ketika karma datang ke hidup lo, lo bisa menghadapi itu dengan baik lah ya. 

Bye!