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realcube · 4 years ago

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What BNHA Heroes have their s/o saved as in their phone

Class 1A x Reader

+ Aizawa and Shinsou

tw// cussing, cringe smh, lots of love <3

Class 1A

Yuga Aoyama

he has you saved as ‘my ✨star✨’

and honestly you love it because he calls you that in real life too

Mina Ashido

she has you saved as ‘bubs 💞💓💖💝💘💕’

the only reason there isn’t more hearts was because of the limit smh

she changes it every few weeks to a new pet name though

also she calls you that irl sometimes

Tsuyu Asui

she has you saved as ‘my flower 🌺’

honestly, the only reason she put you as that rather than your name because of your intense love for flora

every date you take Tsuyu on is always to somewhere with beautiful scenery and an abundance of flowers

Tenya Iida

he has you saved as ‘beef stew’

he originally had you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’

but you showed him that you had him saved as ‘Honey’ so he wanted to save you under a pet name too

however, he couldn’t really think of one so he asked for you assistance and you told him that most cute pet names come from food

“So, what food do I remind you of, Iida?”

“Beef stew.”

Needless to say you both were laughing your asses off for a while after that

but it’s still cute because beef stew is his favourite food just like you are his favourite person

Ochako Uraraka

she has you saved as ‘(L/N) <3 ’

she wanted to use a heart emoticon but her flip-phone doesn’t let her smh

Also she doesn’t have a pet name for you yet but she is working on it

like she tried calling you ‘baby girl’ but then you explained to her the sexual undertones to that name so she stopped and she’s been too embarrassed since then to try again

Mashirao Ojiro

he has you saved as ‘tail boy’s s/o 🤪’

y’all had a whole-ass discussion about this one time lmao

y’all were brainstorming ideas for what you should save each other as in your phones

you didn’t want to have something basic like ‘babe’ or ‘my heart🥰’ but rather something funny and you suggested (jokingly) to save his contact as ‘tail boy’

and rather than being offended like you thought he’d be, you both ended up laughing your asses of together for a solid 5 minutes (at least)

so you saved his contact as that and since he couldn’t come up with a funny nickname in relation to your quirk, he just saved you as ‘tail boy’s s/o🤪’

Denki Kaminari

he has you saved as ‘ASH CECHUM 😩😳💦🌚💓🧀'

plz don’t ask about the emojis idek

anyway, he saw that you saved him as ‘Pikachu <3′ which makes sense considering his quirk..

so he took it upon himself to save your contact as - in his own words - “That guy who owns the Pikachu from Pokémon’

however, despite the fact he has watched Pokémon before, he had no idea how to spell Ash’s second name and apparently the thought never came him that; ‘hey, maybe I should google it.’

so he just sounded it out

as for the all caps, contrary to popular belief , he does know how to turn it off

he just chooses not to for the aesthetic and also it takes a lot of effort

that is why he doesn’t use proper punctuation either

Eijiro Kirishima

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

honestly, you’re not too sure of when or why he changed your contact name after y’all started dating but..

you thought it was cute but..a bit cringe

obviously you didn’t say anything about it though, you weren’t trying to be mean to your boyfriend for no reason

it’s not like he called you that irl

however, he’d be out of his mind if he thought you were gonna save him as something like that

the best he’ll get from you is ‘Kiri babe 🤘' (get it? bc...rock!)

Kouji Koda

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

ASKJFCWB YOU THINK IT IS OUT-OF-THIS-WORLD ADORABLE OML

like it makes sense because he like talks to insects and stuff and you’re his lil love bug cause you are his lover and stuff hhhhh

also because of the size difference between you and him, i mean, you are basically the size of an insect compared to him

in short, Koda supremacy 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♂️

Rikidou Satou

he has you saved as ‘sugar pie’

honestly, poor man

he was completely clueless when you asked him to save you as something cute

like, he know what you meant...but he had no idea what to go for

so you chose for him 👍

and you made a pretty good decision tbh I mean, it’s cute! it relates to his quirk and all

and he has started to call you that irl sometimes and it always makes your heart go brrrrrrr

Mezou Shouji

he has you saved as ‘hunk’

ok, i know i said Satou was a poor man but let me just say

THIS POOR MAN

you told him it’d be cute if you both saved each other as cute pet names in your phones and dead ass him response ‘you’re not my pet though..’

AAAAAAAAAAA

so after a lot of explaining, as an example you whipped out your own phone and showed him how you had saved him as ‘hunk’

...he really went and just copied you

you thought that was so funny and precious though so you didn’t ask him to change it

Kyouka Jirou

she has you saved as ‘my melody 🎶’

ok, so it started when she noticed that you use the same pen everyday - a My Melody one

she thought that was so fucking adorable and she kinda started teasing you for it; not that you minded though

she also thought it was so cute when you’d get all flustered

so one day she just decided to change your contact name to that

it also kinda tied in with her love for music (but mostly her love for you uwu)

Hanta Sero

he has you saved as ‘my honey nutter butter biscuit’

after Kirishima called his s/o ‘love bug’ infront of y’all that one time, you both spent the next hour taking the piss and laughing at how over-the-top couple nicknames are sometimes

so just #for the meme he saved your contact as a hyperbole of what those cringe couple pet names are like

oh and you have him saved as ‘My beloved sweet peach taco’

Fumikage Tokoyami

he has you saved as ‘Helena’

yeah, he wanted to be edgy and save your contact after a MCR song

(no, he does not know that Helena is about Gerard’s grandmother but don’t you dare tell him)

Shoto Todoroki

he has you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N) 💖’

you texted him something during lunch one time to see his reaction while you were sitting next to him but then you noticed that your name in his phone was simply ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’

you mentioned it briefly but you didn’t make a fuss out of it because it really wasn’t a big deal

however, he asked to see what his name in your phone was and you showed him

you had saved him as ‘Babey ( •̀ ω •́ )✧’

he went home and did some research on some good pet names to save you as in his phone

after that, his search history kinda looked like;

‘pet names’

‘pet names for humans’

‘pet names for lovers’

‘cute nicknames for my girlfriend’

‘cute emoticons’

he deadass came in the next day and the first thing he did was pull out his phone and show you the emoji he put next to your name

“Look, (L/N). I found this emoticon and put it next to your contact name in my phone.”

yes, he sound like boomer..obvs

he spends 90% of his free time training rather than on his phone

and the time that he is on his phone, he isn’t using emojis, he is searching shit like

‘how to hack into a credit card without the PIN’

Tooru Hagakure

she saves you as ‘❤😘’

no, she doesn’t need to save you as your name to remember who you are

she’s not a peasant

Katsuki Bakugo

he has you saved as ‘pretty stupid face’

originally it was just ‘stupid face’

but you noticed it and just dropped a subtle comment like “hey, that’s mean.”

so he came in the next day with ‘pretty’ added to the start

“i am genuinely too nice to you sometimes.” he’d say

“THE STUPID FACE PART IS STILL THERE”

“I KNOW BUT I ADDED PRETTY TO THE START!!”

“Wow, tch, such I gentleman-”

“I know-HEY WAIT WAS THAT SARCASM?!”

Izuku Midoriya

he has you saved as ‘sweetest love muffin’

you that one couple i mentioned in Sero’s headcanons?

yeah, that’s y’all

you are both literally that couple

“No, you hang up.”

“No, you hang up!”

“Nooo, cause I’ll miss you”

“I’ll miss you moreeee”

he literally threw a bunch of his favourite adjectives into a pet name lol

also your contact name for him is something on a similar wavelength

Minoru Mineta

I know most y’all would’ve even give him your number lol

but for those who would 🤮

he has you saved as ‘sweet cheeks’ or sumn

Momo Yaoyorozu

she has you saved as ‘My McMuffin’

HOL UP LET ME EXPLAIN

ok so she let you take her to McDonald’s cause you wanted to see her reaction since she is used to gourmet cuisine or whatever

so it was sure to be entertaining

and it was

but not in a good way

she was almost sick after she had a bite of a big mac and then she tried to wash it down with the Sprite but then she fainted for like a solid 10 seconds

once she came back, she obviously wanted to leave..so you did

A year later, y’all are in the town and both of you are starving

But Momo realised that she didn’t have her card on her or any money but that was fine because at least you had your debit card on you

You had enough money on it for a taxi back to Momos place and a McMuffin each

Obviously she didn’t want one but when you started eating in front of her, of course she wanted a taste

and so it was love at first bite

she loved it so much so of course you bought another one for her and she consumed it in a millisecond (not literally)

so now she has your contact saved as the one thing competing against you for her love - a McMuffin

Shota Aizawa

unfortunately he does not have your contact saved as ‘kitten’

instead, in his phone you are saved as ‘The One 💙’

simple, yet it effectively shows his admiration - just the way he likes it

and he only added the emoji to make your name stand out more so he could easily tell whether he was gonna ignore the following message or not

because if Mike is texting him telling his that he needs the extremely important documents that Aizawa keeps in his coded filing cabinet, Shota will be like -.-

but if you text him asking for him to pick up chocolate on his way home, he’ll be like 🏃‍♂️

Hitoshi Shinso

he has you saved as ‘big daddy’

plz don’t ask

it’s an inside joke between you and him

okay well, if you must know

y’all were trying to come up with the most absurd nicknames for each other that kinda sound legit

some other gems

‘Muscleman’

‘Big scary snookums’

‘sexy giant’

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cucinodite · 6 years ago

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PRODOTTI TIPICI DELLA PROVINCIA DI VARESE. Da una vecchia diapositiva: I Brutti e Buoni di Gavirate sono tra i dolci tipici forse più contesi d’Italia. Poiché abito nella provincia di Varese e mi sento campanilista, ti parlo di quelli - appunto - di Gavirate (e non di quelli di Borgomanero, in Piemonte). Questi piccoli biscotti che si sciolgono in bocca sdono stati creati nel 1878 dall’intuizione di Costantino Veniani, la cui pasticceria opera ancora con grande successo. Due, tra le tante, sono le pasticcerie locali che si contendono il primato dei più buoni: quelli nella foto sono della Pasticceria Milano, l’altra ottima versione degli originali di Veniani. TYPICAL PRODUCTS OF THE PROVINCE OF VARESE. From an old slide: I Brutti e Buoni di Gavirate are among the typical sweets that are perhaps the most contested in Italy. Since I live in the province of Varese and I feel like a campanilist, I'm talking about those - in fact - of Gavirate (and not those of Borgomanero, in Piedmont). These small biscuits that melt in your mouth were created in 1878 by the intuition of Costantino Veniani, whose pastry shop still operates with great success. Two, among many, are the local patisseries that compete for the supremacy of the best: those in the picture are from Pasticceria Milano, the other excellent version of the original Veniani. #gavirate #bruttiebuoni #prodottitipicivarese #prodottitipici #varese #lakecomo #personalchefvarese #scuolacucinavarese #personalchef #personalcheflife #cucinaitaliana #cucina #cooking #catering #chefadomicilio #varese #cantello #scuolacucina #cooklife #chefoninstagram #cheflife #kitchenlife #goodfoodgallery #foodporn #instafood (presso Cucino di te) https://www.instagram.com/p/But6VzJlUIcnGM34jRdnTVYDKop9XscCcSWVJs0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1an3j51sly7ze

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trashwizard · 8 years ago

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Pepe the Frog is not a hate symbol or a symbol of fascism or white supremacy I mean Pepe ate string off the carpet How many hate symbols have done that? If you're going to count my boy Pepe as a hate symbols you should be consistent & also count everything else that's popular with the white supremacists as a hate symbol: Doc Martins, Polos, anime, video games, Nordic runes, country music, heavy metal, sweet tea, biscuits, fried chicken, mullets, deer hunting, half of all memes ever ... Are you ready to make sweet tea a hate symbol? You motherfucker?

#pepe #pepe the frog #memes #the alt-right #antifa #I can't remember the name of the comic he's from

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fuckyeahslightlyamusing-blog · 6 years ago

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Opinion: Trump's “dog” remark about Omarosa was racist and sexist

Author Michael Arceneaux explains the racist and sexist implications of Donald Trump's “dog” tweet about Omarosa Manigault Newman. Omarosa Manigault Newman ain't exactly my favorite person.

Not that she has to be nice, but there is a specific meanness to Omarosa. It's a trait she shrewdly exploited by becoming a person whose first name alone identifies her to the masses-a level of fame largely crafted by her leaning into the role of television villain on The Apprentice. And, of course, she has an obvious opportunistic streak. She continues to claim that her motivation for taking a job in Trump's White House was to ensure the Black community had a “seat at the table.” But given that much of the policies and rhetoric from the Trump administration recall a burning cross, it's difficult for any reasonable person-particularly if they are Black-to find her acting in any fashion beyond self-interest.

Speaking with theGrio, Omarosa was asked if she felt that she'd achieved the goals she set forth on behalf of the Black community. “In some ways, I came up short,” she answered. This response is akin to someone asking me if my attempt at the Keto diet was still going strong, and I answer them with a picture of me swimming inside a pool of Popeyes biscuits. But in addition to sinisterism, Omarosa's gifts also include manipulating the media and always finding a way to flip the narrative in her favor.

Such skill set is often attributed to her former co-star and mentor, President Trump-though as we have seen in the tweets, Sweet Potato Saddam is not at all happy with his former protégé.

SAUL LOEB/AFP/Getty Images

You know, I typically don't like to speak for Black folks as if I am the Prime Minister of Black people because it's very Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, back when the media treated them like they were the Brandy and Monica or Ja Rule and Ashanti of civil rights. But I am confident when I say that Black people by and large do not rock with Omarosa. She is that cousin who still might get invited to our functions, but will likely be told the wrong time-say when all of the food and most of the liquor is gone. Aligning herself with Trump is a betrayal. The man is a racist and no one believes her when she acts as if she magically discovered this because she allegedly heard him say “n--r.” She knew he was a racist beforehand; we all did.

That being said, I found myself infuriated by Trump referring to Omarosa Manigault Newman as a “dog.”

When you give a crazed, crying lowlife a break, and give her a job at the White House, I guess it just didn't work out. Good work by General Kelly for quickly firing that dog!

- Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) August 14, 2018

True enough, Trump has a history of referring to rivals as “dogs,” which is rooted in his noted disdain of Scooby and Scrappy. But racism and sexism emanates from the tweet. What else can you get from, “When you give a crazed, crying lowlife a break?”

Trump's views of Black people and women are clear, and when you combine those identities, Trump often employs his harshest insults. Just ask Congresswoman Maxine Waters.

Congresswoman Maxine Waters, an extraordinarily low IQ person, has become, together with Nancy Pelosi, the Face of the Democrat Party. She has just called for harm to supporters, of which there are many, of the Make America Great Again movement. Be careful what you wish for Max!

- Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 25, 2018

Crazy Maxine Waters, said by some to be one of the most corrupt people in politics, is rapidly becoming, together with Nancy Pelosi, the FACE of the Democrat Party. Her ranting and raving, even referring to herself as a wounded animal, will make people flee the Democrats!

- Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 3, 2018

You don't have to like Omarosa to believe she does not deserve to be described as a “dog” or “lowlife.”

This indecent, ignorant, bigoted man continues to debase the office of the presidency with his rhetoric and with one new low after another. Omarosa is just the latest target, but there is always a noticeable level of additional callousness leveraged at women-especially Black women.

Although I hate the notion of a Black woman being referred to as a dog by the President of the United States, I do wonder where Omarosa's head is. Has she learned anything? Like, say, not leaning her Black self to the political ambitions of a racist? Based on her interviews, I doubt it. Give her all the kudos for garnering as much media attention as possible for her book by answering interview questions like the star of the three-part reunion for The Real Housewives of White Supremacy-but was any of this worth it?

Omarosa once claimed that Trump haters would have to “bow down” to him, and in the end, he dismisses her as a “dog.” Perhaps she thinks the lesson here is to beat folks at their own game, but from this viewpoint, all she did was play herself. Omarosa is nobody's “dog,” but she was foolish to ever attach herself to someone who had the potential to say such a thing.

Michael Arceneaux is the New York Times bestselling author of the newly released book I Can't Date Jesus from Atria Books/Simon & Schuster. His work has appeared in the New York Times, the Washington Post, Rolling Stone, Essence, The Guardian, Mic, and more. Follow him on Twitter.

The post Opinion: Trump's “dog” remark about Omarosa was racist and sexist appeared first on HelloGiggles.

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gayyogurt-blog · 6 years ago

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Opinion: Trump's “dog” remark about Omarosa was racist and sexist

Author Michael Arceneaux explains the racist and sexist implications of Donald Trump's “dog” tweet about Omarosa Manigault Newman. Omarosa Manigault Newman ain't exactly my favorite person.

Such skill set is often attributed to her former co-star and mentor, President Trump-though as we have seen in the tweets, Sweet Potato Saddam is not at all happy with his former protégé.

SAUL LOEB/AFP/Getty Images

That being said, I found myself infuriated by Trump referring to Omarosa Manigault Newman as a “dog.”

When you give a crazed, crying lowlife a break, and give her a job at the White House, I guess it just didn't work out. Good work by General Kelly for quickly firing that dog!

- Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) August 14, 2018

Trump's views of Black people and women are clear, and when you combine those identities, Trump often employs his harshest insults. Just ask Congresswoman Maxine Waters.

- Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 25, 2018

- Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 3, 2018

You don't have to like Omarosa to believe she does not deserve to be described as a “dog” or “lowlife.”

The post Opinion: Trump's “dog” remark about Omarosa was racist and sexist appeared first on HelloGiggles.

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adambstingus · 6 years ago

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IPAs for people who think they hate hoppy, bitter beers

(Courtesy of Otter Creek Brewing)

(Courtesy of Sixpoint Brewery)

(Courtesy of Founders Brewing)

(Courtesy of 21st Amendment Brewery)

(Courtesy of Dogfish Head Brewery)

Previous Next

Everyone loves IPAs, right? That was my theory when I started writing Complete IPA, my deep dive into the recent phenomenon thats seen IPAs take over tap lines from L.A. to Tokyo, Rio to Berlin and beer-soaked lands in between. But as I, uh, endlessly researched (hey, that double IPA aint going to drink itself), I discovered both bitter revelation and opposition: I dont like IPAs, I heard time and again.

Anchovies? Blue cheese? I get the intense dislike. Whats not to love about fragrant IPAs? Theyre flavor chameleons, tasting like rainbow sorbet or evoking pine forests, sipping as smooth as gelato or spiky with bitterness. Theyre blank slates for breweries experimental whims.

The IPA is not one thing, its everything, with flavor combinations as infinite and inventive as Ben and Jerrys ice cream. Ive heard the complaints, the bitterness and booziness, staleness and uncertainty. Whatever your beef with IPAs, I guarantee Ive got one youll actually like.

Problem: You dont like bitter beers

Fix: Try the new-breed Northeast-style IPAs.

During the IPAs early millennium ascent, brewers escalated bitterness, constantly one-upping each other with beers so bitter you could barely finish a bottle. It was like sports bars serving ever-fierier chicken wings.

The newest member of the Alchemist Family! Cookie. pic.twitter.com/Y4nVcjhOUX

John Kimmich (@alchemistbeer) May 24, 2015

That fads phasing out. By using hops (especially varieties evocative of things like tropical fruit and ripe peaches) later in the brewing process, beer makers intensify fragrances and aromas, not bitterness. Keep the beer unfiltered for a foggier color and fuller flavor, maybe add oats and wheat for smoothness, and you have a template for the juicy new-school IPA thats sweeping the Northeast and the nation.

If youve had the Alchemists silky-smooth Heady Topper or any IPA from Hill Farmstead, youll like the dankly addictive Substance from Maines Bissell Brothers, or maybe Trilliums Congress Street IPA. Think: biscuits, sun-warmed peaches, sweet melons.

Many Northeast IPAs are hard-to-get, requiring a road trip. (Try this Vermont trek.) More widely distributed examples include Otter Creek Backseat Berner, a sweetly hazy stumble through pine forests and citrus groves, and Sixpoint Puff, as cloudy and resinous as a dorm room.

Moreover, the Northeast style has spread nationwide, with Colorado-based Odd13s Caribbean-fruity Codename: Superfan and Portland brewery Great Notion doling out hazy, hardly bitter hop bombs like Ripe and Juice Box.

Problem: IPAs all taste the same.

Fix: Seek out a new hop variety.

Pine trees. Citrus. Primo weed. Taste too many IPAs and they blur together like lunch at a cut-rate Chinese buffet. To escape the flavor fatigue, grab a pale ale or IPA humming with fresh varieties of hops, the flowers that impart bitterness, aroma, and flavor. Here are some hops to look out for:

Founders Mosaic Promise and Karl Strauss Mosaic Session IPA both showcase (you guessed it) Mosaic hops, which impart notes of blueberries, papaya, peaches, and pine.

IPAs for People Who *Think* They Hate Them: https://t.co/lasZsIfw5F from @JoshMBernstein & @bonappetit pic.twitter.com/QSGXitOkSr

Founders Brewing Co. (@foundersbrewing) August 31, 2016

Germanys Mandarina Bavaria hop adds orangey complexity to beers such as Skas Modus Mandarina IPA (it also contains sweet orange peels).

Like watermelon Jolly Ranchers? Youll love El Dorado hops, which star in Maine Beer Companys A Tiny Beautiful Something and Stone Delicious IPA, a gluten-reduced beer also containing the citrusy Lemondrop hops.

New Zealands fruity Nelson Sauvin hops provide a white winelike nuance in Widmer Brothers Upheaval IPA and SanTan Brewings MoonJuice, which also contains Australias peachy, melon-like Galaxy hops. Give it a go in Tasmanian IPA, from Schlafly, or Tallgrass 8-Bit Pale Ale.

Always want to be surprised by an IPA? Firestone Walkers canned and bottled Luponic Distortion features a new blend of experimental hops every 90 days.

Problem: IPAs are too strong.

Fix: Grab a session IPAor six.

Over the years, the IPAs baseline ABV has crept up to around 7 percent. Two or three pints can swirl eyes like peppermint candy. Thats to say nothing of the double, triple, and quadruple IPAs, rivaling Riesling and Cabernet for ABV supremacy.

Instead of sacrificing sobriety for flavor, breweries have created low-alcohol, high-aroma IPAs that are about as boozy as Bud Lightbut about a million times more flavorful. Try Evil Twin Citra Sunshine Slacker, as bright and tropical as a Caribbean vacation; 21st Amendment Down to Earth, reminiscent of toast topped with berry jam; or a Founders citrus-spritzed All Day IPA, a party beer sold by the 15-pack suitcase.

Problem: IPAs never, ever taste fresh.

Fix: Check for the bottled- or canned-on date, or hit a brewery for a release.

To savor an IPA as the brewer intended, you should drink them close to their birthday.

Deciphering freshness used to be difficult, the date code a hieroglyphic string of numbers and letters. Increasingly, breweries utilize a simplified best by or packaged on code, commonly found on a beer bottles neck or label, or a cans bottom. Generally speaking, IPAs are ideally enjoyed within 90 days. And seek out beers stored cold, far from sunshine.

Instead of stalking a delivery truck, you can also look for Stones Enjoy By series of IPAs. Their expiration dates37 days after packagingare built directly into the label, while Sam Adams similarly themed Rebel Raw double IPA has a 35-day shelf life.

Problem: You dont know what an IPA tastes like

Fix: Try a fruited IPA.

Buying IPAs has never been easieror more mystifying. But labels dont always accurately describe the liquid inside, sometimes leading to disappointment. To hedge your bets, look to the new breed of fruit-infused IPAs. Done deftly, adding blood oranges, grapefruit, or pineapple can accentuate the inherent fruity profile of hops. Fruited IPAs are never subtle, sure, but they are truth in advertising, a trusted commodity.

Try Dogfish Heads brand-new Flesh & Blood, tart and zesty with lemon pulp and blood orange juice, and New Belgiums Citradelica sweetly tropical love letter to tangerines. Also, Ballast Point has spun off several variants of its tropical Sculpin, including pineapple and grapefruit versions that taste like never-ending summer vacation.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/ipas-for-people-who-think-they-hate-hoppy-bitter-beers/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/176711439537

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allofbeercom · 6 years ago

Text

IPAs for people who think they hate hoppy, bitter beers

(Courtesy of Otter Creek Brewing)

(Courtesy of Sixpoint Brewery)

(Courtesy of Founders Brewing)

(Courtesy of 21st Amendment Brewery)

(Courtesy of Dogfish Head Brewery)

Previous Next

Problem: You dont like bitter beers

Fix: Try the new-breed Northeast-style IPAs.

The newest member of the Alchemist Family! Cookie. pic.twitter.com/Y4nVcjhOUX

John Kimmich (@alchemistbeer) May 24, 2015

Problem: IPAs all taste the same.

Fix: Seek out a new hop variety.

Founders Mosaic Promise and Karl Strauss Mosaic Session IPA both showcase (you guessed it) Mosaic hops, which impart notes of blueberries, papaya, peaches, and pine.

IPAs for People Who *Think* They Hate Them: https://t.co/lasZsIfw5F from @JoshMBernstein & @bonappetit pic.twitter.com/QSGXitOkSr

Founders Brewing Co. (@foundersbrewing) August 31, 2016

Germanys Mandarina Bavaria hop adds orangey complexity to beers such as Skas Modus Mandarina IPA (it also contains sweet orange peels).

Always want to be surprised by an IPA? Firestone Walkers canned and bottled Luponic Distortion features a new blend of experimental hops every 90 days.

Problem: IPAs are too strong.

Fix: Grab a session IPAor six.

Problem: IPAs never, ever taste fresh.

Fix: Check for the bottled- or canned-on date, or hit a brewery for a release.

To savor an IPA as the brewer intended, you should drink them close to their birthday.

Problem: You dont know what an IPA tastes like

Fix: Try a fruited IPA.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/ipas-for-people-who-think-they-hate-hoppy-bitter-beers/

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dumbcountrylyrics-blog · 7 years ago

Link

i’ve been busy covering more ground this week than a pickup truck on a dirt road, so the febreze queen, defender of tick sex appeal, is here for a guest spot:

“What Country Is” by Luke Bryan is another unfortunate entry into the almost Rabbinical debates over what is and isn’t country, which one would think would be humble, simple and down to earth, yet seems to have more requirements than there are citation pages in the Astrophysical Journal. Anyway, buckle up ya’ll and leave your umbrella drinks at the door.

“There's a house fly swimmin' in my sweet tea” Okay Luke now that’s just fucking disgusting, okay? Not only is there a giant-ass dead bug in your drink, you’re fucking bragging about it? Sadly, no respect for basic standards of sanitation and decency will prove to be a common theme in Mr. Bryan’s work, as if cleanliness is cooties and if you catch it you’ll never be allowed back into the “no girls allowed” fort house.

“Butter drippin' off a biscuit, baby better take a bite” In which we examine the humble biscuit, laden with churned cream as if suggestive of forces of life and vitality and OH MY GOD IT'S A PENIS AND A BLOWJOB BECAUSE COUNTRY SONGS HAVE NO FUCKING CHILL

“It ain't a rebel flag you bought at the mall” You know, initially I was heartened by this line, the rejection of the concept of country being inextricably tied to racial identity, white supremacy, nationalism and historical revision, but instead being tied to a connection to the land, a way of life and shitty taste in music, before realizing that wasn’t what this implied at all. No, the rejection is not of the rebel flag, but the fact that this fucking poser bought his at the mall. See, you gotta inherit your rebel flag from your great great great grandpappy, a Sergeant First Class in those good old Dixie forces fighting to keep chattel slavery as a way of life, and fly it proud like your great grandpappy did when terrorizing all those damn colored people with his Klan buddies so they’d go back to where they belong. NOW THAT’S COUNTRY

“It's a hide away bed in an old horse stall” You know Mr. Bryan, this may come as a shock to you, but I’ve been in horse stalls, and HOLY SHIT ARE THEY DISGUSTING we’re talking active decomposition of stratified layers of straw and shit. Now, one might assume that the purpose for this hide away bed is sexual intercourse (re: country songs & having no fucking chill) in which case, congrats, you now have jock itch, she has a yeast infection, everyone gets UTIs and you can be so fucking proud as you scratch your crotch back to the “no girls allowed” fort house of bro country because once again you’ve managed to be incredibly fucking disgusting

“It's cars pulling over for a no-cab tractor” Now hold on to your bud, Mr. Bryan, because I have yet another shocker for you, but I live in an area that some might, well, consider the country, and when a tractor drives down the road here, IT OBEYS THE GODDAMN TRAFFIC LAWS JUST LIKE ANYBODY ELSE. You know what Mr. Bryan? Maybe where you live just isn’t country enough, because when you see a truck ya’ll just flip the fuck out and have no idea what to do and pull over, you ever think about that? Maybe if you lived in the REAL COUNTRY, you wouldn’t need to make a big deal about trucks on the road because you see them every day, hmmmm?

Obeying sensible traffic laws? NOW THAT’S COUNTRY

#luke bryan #what country is #country music #dumb lyrics

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