#supernatural slow burn
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Oh! I love that one ship...
You know the one with the repressed bisexual 80's leather wearing charmer with daddy issues and a million dollar smile and the autistic repressed gay twink who wears vaguely vintage clothing with sassy mannerisms and avoidance issues!
(the game here is guess what ship im talking about)
#destiel#blackbonnet#ofmd blackbeard#good omens#ineffable husbands#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#charles rowland#stede bonnet#ofmd 2#supernatural#archangel aziraphale#azirphale#crowley#good omens 2#dead boy detective agency#its the same ship#its the same picture#i swear if i had a nickel#if i had a nickel#castiel#dean winchester#bisexual dean winchester#i have faith in a slow burn charles and edwin#charles just gotta get with the program guys#itll take him a minute but i have faith#neil gaiman
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What fans call „slow burn“ today is so wild
„Omg they are so slow burn! I can not stand the pining any longer!“ The couple in question kisses after one season containing 8 episodes
Honey….
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He's a Winchester
Chapter 2
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Summary: It's been a long time since (Y/n) and Dean's paths have crossed. Last time they saw each other it was ‘98 and they were young and living in the moment. Nine years down the Line, their paths cross again, but (Y/n)s longest kept secret is about to become Deans reality.
Slow burn (ish), mom!reader
Warnings: language, mention of toxic parenting/custody battle, angst, alcohol,
Chapter Word Count: 3471
MDNI 18+
A/N: here it is! I’m not gonna lie, this is going to be very slow burn at first, but don’t worry, you know me and you know how much juicy content I write so it’s definitely coming hahaha. I’m also trying to figure out a schedule for posting this, so hopefully I can upload two chapters a week.
A/N2: GUYS IT GOES WITHOUT SAYING but PLEEEEASE provide your age if you want to be added to the taglist and it isn’t in your blog. This story is tame now but it’s gonna get spicy, and my blog is strictly 18+. So pleeeeease save be a very long job and help a gal out.
Photos from Pinterest
Previous Chapter: Chapter 1
Chapter 2
I reached for the bottle of wine for the third time in the last hour and a half. I was sitting with Kat, pyjamas adorned, in the living room of mine and Levi's modest two bedroom house. For financial (and personal) reasons, our little house didn't follow current trends and looked more like something out of a popular 90s sitcom. The couch was comfy, the blankets were fuzzy, and a fresh pot of coffee was always brewing. Pictures embellished the walls of every milestone Levi had achieved; every birthday party, every new dirt bike, every new hairstyle. There were a few of Kat and I from over the years, going way back to when we first met back in ‘99 and both decided to rock platform heels on at the turn of the millennium - having tiny babies at the time didn't seem to stop us. Every single moment on these walls was a happy memory - something that I would treasure forever, yet there was something missing. There were no photos - or perhaps a scarce few - of my own parents, or of them with Levi, or of any extended family for that matter. The price I paid when I decided to have my son out of wedlock, at barely twenty years old, with a man who my family saw as a total stranger, is a price I'd pay every time in a heartbeat. Kat and Toby were our family now, and that was more than I could ever ask for. That was why the sheer possibility of Levi getting to meet his dad for the first time in, well, ever… it had my mind spinning. It was a scenario I'd dreamt of, late at night when I couldn't sleep and the burdens of life weighed me down. I conjured false memories in my minds eye of the pair of them fixing his bike on the drive or driving to school in the impala. I pictured us having breakfast together as a family and taking trips to the movies. Being together. Because no matter how many dates I went on, or how many frogs I’d kissed over the years, none of them were Levi's father.
None of them were Dean Winchester.
“Girl you have to reach out to him,” Kat walked in from the adjacent kitchen before slumping on the couch next to me, wine glass elevated to reduce spillage.
“Kat I could barely look at him today without feeling like I was going to have a heart attack - how the fuck am I supposed to talk to him?” I glanced at her with wide eyes, every nerve in my body on edge despite the wine and scented candles. Kat sighed.
“You might never get this opportunity again, and we both know that if you don’t give Levi the opportunity to meet his father then you’re going to regret it for the rest of your life.” I held my breath, urging the raging storm in my mind to quiet down before letting the air gush from my lungs.
“Yeah I know. I just…I just never thought that this would actually happen, you know? I never thought that Dean would show up here. I figured Levi would eventually track him down when he was old enough to make that decision on his own. I have no idea how to even approach this.”
“Sure you do!” Kat beamed, a wicked glint in her eye, “you sit him down and say, ‘Hey Dean! Remember when we had sex in the back of that amazing car of yours nine years ago? Well, actions have consequences, and yours in eight years old and sitting in his science class right now.’”
I couldn't stop the grin from spreading across my face and I cackled when the bit of popcorn I threw landed in her wine glass.
“Bitch.”
I blew her a kiss in response to her insult. It didn’t take long though for the distraction to run its course and for my mind to return to its state of panic.
“But seriously, what am I going to say to him? What if I tell him, and he rejects us too, like my family did?”
Her smile softened.
“From everything that you’ve told me about that man, I highly doubt he’s going to reject you. Sure, he might not stick around permanently, but he sounds like the kind of guy that would stay in touch,” her softened smile turned to a stern stare, “but he’s only going to do that if he knows. He deserves to know he has a son.”
I took a long gulp of my wine.
“Yeah, I’m going to tell him…” I paused, gnawing my bottom lip as I drew my knees to my chest, “it’s Saturday tomorrow so I’m not at work and Levi has two hours at the track. I can try to do it tomorrow, but I’m not sure if I’ll even be able to track Dean down in that time - I have no idea where he could be.”
“Hey, I’ll pick up Levi from Motocross - it’s been a few days since him and Toby have spent any proper time together anyway, just them two. Tobes’ has been dying to show him those brand new boots of his.”
We shared a smile. That’s the thing about Kat; she always had my back, no matter the situation.
“Thanks babes, I owe you one.”
She shook her head.
“No way - this is me returning the favour from when Toby’s dad decided to show an interest in his own child. I’m pretty sure my kid thought you were adopting him at one point from how much he stayed here,” I laughed, remembering the camp bed I bought especially for Toby, along with all the extra duvet sets and boxes of cereal I’d had to purchase for the best part of half a year.
“He’s a good kid, and honestly he and Levi entertained themselves for most of it.”
There was another pause in the conversation as I recounted how difficult it had been for Kat when David had shown up, insisting on being a part of Tobys life despite zero contact since his son was born. They’d argued over custody, over which school he went to, the clubs he attended. Even his hobbies were on the line, with David wanting him to play football despite Toby already being involved down at the track with the bikes. The stress caused Kat to lose weight and sleep, and she nearly lost her job over it all when she kept falling asleep at her desk. I’d lost count of how many times she’d cried in my arms. Cried over a man who thought that practically owning his son was his God given right despite being an absent father, and I think that is what scared me the most. That I would feel the same wretched things that she felt, and the waves of disappointment that crashed over her time and time again when false promises were made. It took her months to settle on an agreement due to David's behaviour, and Toby finally sees his father, albeit only for one weekend a month. It's better than nothing, but certainly not worth the fight that was fought with blood, sweat and tears.
I hope from the bottom of my heart that Dean takes the news well, and doesn't leave us in the dust like he does in my worst nightmares.
It had taken me around thirty minutes to track down Dean. Well, to at least find the impala. It's common knowledge that if you find that car, Dean isn't far away. I’d parked my truck two spaces down, and luckily we were within walking distance of my favourite café, Jolenes’. It was my safe space. The place that I would finally tell him about Levi.
I pulled the sleeves of my soft cardigan down over my hands to stop myself from chewing nervously on my nails. Leaving the safety of my truck, I paced over to the black Chevy and stood by it, determined to speak to Dean as soon as possible. I knew that if I had stayed sitting behind my own wheel, there was a huge chance that I'd chicken out and just drive away. As I waited I checked over the car in front of me, admiring how he still kept it spotless after all these years. Unable to stop myself, I let my gaze drift over to the backseat, the events that unfurled on the soft leather racing to mind. I pulled my lip between my teeth, unable to resist the replay of memories.
“You have good taste in cars.”
I practically launched out my skin as the voice came from behind me. I could hear the amusement in his voice from a few feet away. I spun on my heel and our eyes locked, the charming grin slipping slightly from Deans’ lips when he realised it was me. The playfulness in his features quickly softened, a true, genuine smile now gracing his lips.
“Dean…” I suddenly felt breathless, but despite my nerves I returned his smile in kind.
“It's good to see you (Y/n),” he stepped forward and pulled me into his arms, enveloping me in his entirety. I closed my eyes as I hugged him back, wrapping my arms around his neck and taking a deep breath, my brain tingling at his familiar scent.
“You too, Dean. It's been too long.”
After a moment we released each other and Dean stood up straight, smiling at me again with a soft twinkle in his eye. We both flinched slightly when someone cleared their throat and he took a step back.
“Oh, uh, (Y/n), this is Sam, my younger brother,” he patted the shoulder of the young man standing beside him, and I instantly recognised him from the dessert parlour. He was tall, taller than Dean even, which was one hell of an accomplishment, and his face held a similar boyish charm to Deans. Yet he looked softer around the edges, like he hadn't been hardened by life too much yet.
“It's a pleasure, I'm (Y/n). I've known you're brother for a while,” I smiled as I shook his hand, taking note of the rough calluses beginning to form on his palms. “He used to talk about you all the time, apparently you're the smart one of the family,” with a grin and a quick glance at Dean, I tested the waters with humour. If he laughed or took the blow like a champ, now was a good time to talk to him. Sam chuckled, squeezing my hand slightly in his before letting it go.
“Ouch… (Y/n), sweetheart, aren't you supposed to be on my side here? Y’know, with our history and all…?” he feigned hurt with a hand on his chest before his lips twitched up and he shot me a wink.
“I mean… she's not wrong,” Sam laughed, dropping his hands lazily into his pockets.
“Hey, I'm just going on what you told me, Dean. Don't hold that against me,” I grinned at them both, unsure of what to do with my hands so I crossed them across my chest.
A small breath of silence passed between us, Deans’ gaze holding mine with an intensity that made me want to look away. I didn't. Sam cleared his throat again, clapping his hand to Deans’ shoulder before taking a step back.
“I'll, uh, give you guys a few minutes,” and with an appreciative nod from Dean, Sam gave us some space. With his younger brother gone, my heart began to flutter in my chest. The time to break the news was getting closer, and my nerves were on edge. On fire.
“So,” he started, taking a step closer with a deep breath, “how's it going? How long has it been?”
“Nine years,” I was almost too hot on the mark, my words coming out faster than I'd intended and Dean blinked slightly. I sighed, looking down. “There's been a lot going on, and honestly, I've really needed you at times. You're a hard man to find Dean Winchester.”
“I'm sorry, sweetheart,” his brows pinched apologetically and he reached for my hand, tracing my knuckles with his thumb. I took a deep breath and met his gaze again.
“Do you… do you have some time? I need to talk to you. It's important, and if I don't do it now, I don't know if I'll get another chance.”
He nodded slowly, giving my hand a squeeze, releasing it hesitantly with a slight wince to his features.
“Uh oh,” he said, “am I in trouble?”
I laughed, the sound light off my chest.
“Oh Dean,” I reached up to touch his face, and his instinctive reaction was to lean into my palm, “you don't know the half of it.”
The walk to the café had been pleasant. We chatted about what we'd been up to since we last met - Dean revealing he was still in the same line of work and had travelled around a lot, never really settling down. There was something about that nugget of information that made my stomach twist in knots. He learnt I was still a receptionist, this time at the local garage instead of the large dealership I had scored before. He asked why I'd changed, to go to something smaller, lesser, and my silence urged him to wait until we were at our destination. He knew I was anxious, and he did his best to keep conversation light and breezy until the time was right. To an untrained eye he was unphased, yet I could tell from the lip nibbling and flitting gaze that he was nervous too.
Do you think he's already guessed it?
The bell jingled as we walked in, the two baristas looking up and instantly greeting me with a wave and a smile.
“Hey (Y/n)! Your couch is free,” the first barista, a young man around my age with soft blond curls waved to me across the counter, his brilliant grin making me smile with a comforting familiarity. “Your usual?”
“Yes please! Thanks, Jake,” I returned the friendliness, stepping around the tables until we arrived at my favourite spot.
“And for your… date?” He gestured to Dean, who was now shrugging off his leather jacket, “what can I get for you pal?”
Dean hesitated, before just holding his hands up.
“Uhhh, I don't know, I guess I'll have what she's having.”
With our hot beverages on their way, I sat down in my usual nook in the corner whilst Dean sat down opposite, in that same plush armchair that Kat had sat in yesterday. Where Kat had been swallowed by the chair and its all-consuming cushions, Dean had the opposite effect. He made the chair look small under his broad form, like it was made for a child. There were a few moments of silence, neither of us really knowing where to start. So I bit the bullet.
“Dean… before I tell you anything, just know that I've been trying to get hold of you on and off for years. Your number always seemed to go to voicemail and I never got a call back. So please just… know I tried.”
I looked up and he was totally engaged, already hanging off every word I said as he leant forward, his elbows on his knees. Our attention pulled away from each other briefly as our coffees arrived, hand delivered by the second barista - a woman a few years older than myself with a jet black pixie cut.
“Thanks Emily, you're an angel,” I grasped the mug before she even had a chance to put it on the table and clutched it in my lap, letting the warmth seep through my palms to help soothe my nerves.
“No worries babes, you two have fun,” she looked between Dean and me with a playful smirk, throwing me a wink before she turned around.
Great, the gossip starts now.
I turned back to Dean who was now sitting on the edge of his seat. I took a deep breath.
Do it now.
“Dean, I have a son.”
I watched his face twitch slightly, almost like it dropped in disappointment, however it was so fleeting across his features that it was hard to tell. He pulled a strained smile onto his lips.
“(Y/n) that's great, I'm happy for you,” he looked down at his boots briefly, choosing his next words, “I guess this is you telling me to stay away, huh? Now that you have a family and all. It's ok, I get it.”
I shook my head, placing my cup on the table so I could pull myself to sit on the edge of the couch, almost mirroring Dean.
“No, no Dean, that's not- look, what I'm saying is…” another deep breath, “you, have a son.”
I watched his eyes go wide, unsure if he heard me correctly.
“What?” His voice was breathy.
I looked down into my mug for a second, choosing my words.
“I have a little boy; he's eight, his name is Levi…and he's yours, Dean. He's your son.”
I dared to look up at him, watching his eyes go wider and his mind empty of thoughts. Either that, or his mind is racing so fast that it's left his body on standby. I gave him a few minutes to process the news. Or at least process it the best he could as it would likely be days or weeks before this fully sunk in. Nervousness prickled at my own skin, my worst fears of rejection bubbling to the surface again at his silence. I sighed.
“It’s ok, Dean, I’m not expecting you to-”
He stood abruptly, stepped over the coffee table and pulled me to my feet, wrapping his strong arms around me in a crushing grip. His arms were so tight that it almost winded me, yet I returned his embrace. The feeling of his lips on the top of my head surprised me as he kissed my hair, the sensation warm and comforting. He placed one, two more kisses before he cupped my face in his large hands, his rough palms gentle against my cheeks as I locked eyes with him. The sight was beautiful. The annoyance and exasperation that I expected to be met with was nowhere to be seen, and I saw no shadow of negativity within those evergreen eyes. All I saw was love. Pride. Joy. Excitement. The relief washing over me felt the same as climbing into your nice, warm comfy bed when on the brink of exhaustion.
“I’m a dad?” his voice cracked slightly whilst his eyes shimmered.
I nodded as a grin erupted across his face, followed by an airy, almost unbelieving chuckle.
“Holy fuck, (Y/n)-”
“You’re not mad?” my voice was quiet.
“What?” Dean looked at me as though I’d grown a second head, “of course not. Why would I be mad?”
“Because it’s been nine years since we last saw each other, and suddenly this woman who you’ve not spoken to in nearly a decade drops the biggest truth bomb on you. A truth bomb that I know you definitely weren’t expecting,” I try to step back but he pulls me in for another hug, squeezing the air out of me a second time.
“(Y/n), sweetheart, this is the best bit of news I’ve had in a long, long time.”
I smiled into his chest, freeing my arms to wrap them around his neck and pull him down into a hug of my own. We stood for a moment in our embrace as the coffee shop busied around us. I knew this shop and I knew this town and people would soon start to talk, start to try and figure out Dean: like who is he? How does he know (Y/n)? Why are they acting so familiar? Is he trouble? But that was all unimportant rubbish that I would deal with later. Right now, Levis father was here, and he knew. For the first time in my adult life I felt like I wasn’t keeping some devastating secret from an incredible man, and it was like I could breathe again.
Pulling away from Deans’ bear hug, I tucked the wisps of hair away that had come loose from my claw grip and grinned up at him, reaching for his hand. I held it in mine as I swayed slightly on the spot, like an excited schoolgirl who’d just been asked on her first date. Dean smiled down at me, the sort of smile that shone on top of the world.
“So…” I started, biting my lip slightly.
“Do you want to meet your son?”
Next Chapter: Chapter 3
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“what broke the connection” “i don’t know” OH REALLY CASTIEL ? YOU DONT KNOW? AND DEAN JUST GOES WITH THAT ? AFTER WHAT JUST HAPPENED ?
#they’re having a moment#love when my boys are in denial#really puts the slow in slow burn#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#castiel#destiel#deancas#spn s8#spn 8x17
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The Tattoo
Aaron Hotchner x fem!reader
Criminal Minds x Supernatural
Summary: Your first humankind case reveals a new Hotchner´s side you didn´t know.
Content Warning: Flirty Hotch, Homicide description, Abuse, Rape, Violence, Triggering situations. (Please let me know if I let something out.)
Note: This is my version of the episode "Jones" in the early seasons, I changed a lot of the things but not all of them, It is just how I would've liked the case to be in my opinion, and obviously added a bunch of other things to fit the thread of my story, like Jason Gideon not being there. I hope you like it.
“Short stuff, are you ready?”
“Nope”
“Come on, you’re going to be just fine.” Morgan gifted you a reassuring smile.
This was your first time filling in for a member of the group. Normally it wasn’t necessary, but the team was reduced to four. Emily was on mandatory vacation and JJ stayed at home to take care of a sick Henry, so now your presence was requested.
“It’s not what I’m used to.”
“No it’s not, but you are a great agent and will do just fine.” He said gently squeezing your arm. “You will charm them all.”
“Of course I will, there is no doubt.” You smiled back.
“Let’s go then.”
You both walked to the briefing room where the rest of the team was waiting, Morgan quickly walked to the empty chair In front of you, slightly pushing you to the side, leaving you with no option but to sit next to Hotch, not that you minded but lately all the members of the team have been acting a little weird.
You looked at Morgan with a questioning look but he completely ignored you and lowered his gaze to read the case files.
“We have a serial killer in New Orleans. Two men’s dead bodies were found over the last month, and a third body was found last night, the same MO, male, throat slashed, they were all found in semi-public places in the French Quarter.” You heard Penelope explain. “The local police have no leads and no suspects so far, Mike Weller, the head detective is waiting for you.”
Hotch nodded and looked at everyone in the room. “Wheels up in thirty.” He said before disappearing out the door.
—
When arriving, Hotch sent you and Reid to the forensic lab to examine the body.
“No hesitation marks.” You said pointing to the terrible wounds.
Spencer nodded. “Cuts are methodical and almost procedural.”
The forensic doctor looked at both of you. “The person who did this definitely had medical training, there’s no other way he could have done this.”
“He?” You glaze up to the doctor.
“No defensive wounds and took out pretty big men.” You frowned. “Although all the toxicology tests showed signs of alcohol.”
“Any relatives came to claim the body?” Spencer asked.
The doctor nodded. “His wife came with his former colleague.” Both of you looked at him with a confused expression. “He was a retired officer.”
“The lead detective didn’t say anything about that.”
“I’m not surprised, he wasn’t popular at all, he had a reputation for being a dirty cop.”
“I’ll call Garcia.” You said getting your phone out.
But suddenly Spencer’s phone began to ring and he immediately answered. “Where? Okay, we’ll be there.” He looked at you as he got off the phone. “Another body was found, call her on the way there.”
—
“Same MO.” Morgan informed. “Some people saw him leave the bar down the street.”
“So, he was drunk just like the other victim.” You said while eyeing the Weller. “Do we know his profession?”
“Does it matter?” He asked with a hint of annoyance in his voice.
You step aside standing closer to him and shrugging your shoulders. “Humor me, detective.”
Detective Weller side-eyed you but nodded. “He was a well-known lawyer.”
“I see.” You crossed your arms while raising an eyebrow. “You forgot to mention that the fourth victim was a cop who used to work at your police station.”
“I don’t think it is relevant to the case.” Weller huffed.
“Well, we don’t know that yet.” You insisted. “Do we?”
The BAU men were looking at your disagreement with confusion, and suddenly a strong back wearing a gray and elegant suit got in between, blocking your vision. It took only a few seconds to recognize that it belonged to Hotchner.
“We would like to have access to all of the information available, it’s vital to be able to get the unsub’s profile.“ You heard Aaron talking to the detective.
“Sure, Agent Hotchner.” After Weller left the crime scene, Hotch turned around to see you.
“You are riding with me.” Hotch left the place hurriedly making you roll your eyes and toss your keys at Spencer.
You manage to keep up with Hotch’s pace and climb up on the SUV, some minutes passed and neither of you talked, but you got tired of the unbearable silence.
“If you’re going to scold me, just do it now.”
“I’m not.”
“Hotch he was in the wrong, you know that, right?”
“I’m aware.” You shot him a puzzled look.
“Then why get in the middle of my conversation?”
”Because that wasn’t a conversation, he was starting to raise his voice.”
“I can take it, Hotchner.”
“I know you can, doesn’t mean I want you to.” You felt how your facial expression softened at his comment. “Listen, some of these detectives think we are here to make them look bad, they feel threatened.”
You rolled your eyes. “How are their insecurities my fault?”
Hotch chuckled a bit. “They are not, just go easy on them so we can keep the case.”
—
You, Hotch, and Spencer stayed at the precinct to read all the new information about the victims while Rossi and Morgan left to talk with the new possible witnesses. Currently, you are on your third cup of coffee and your fifth case file.
“I can’t believe we were missing all this information.” You hissed.
“Simmer down.” Hotch murmured.
You looked at the evidence board leaning against the table, focusing on the victim's photos, and frowning when looking closer.
“Oh.”
“You found something new?” Spencer asked.
“Hmm, have you seen that all the victims have tattoos?” Both men got closer to look at the photos.
“Well actually, in some religions tattoos are forbidden because they think of the body as a temple.” Spencer babbled and immediately stood up from his chair. “Some other religions even think that if you get a tattoo, you’re not allowed in heaven.”
“Really?” A look of confusion crossed your face.
Spencer quickly nodded while pointing up with his finger. “You shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor tattoo any marks on you: I am the Lord. Leviticus 19:28.” He added.
“So, we think this is a religious matter?” You asked.
“It could be a coincidence. Let’s ask Garcia if she can find something about it.” Spencer took his phone and left the room, leaving you and Hotch alone, looking at the board side to side.
“Well, that’s concerning. You know, some tattoos are meant to protect you.”
Hotch turned his head towards you. “What do you mean?”
“There’s this kind of tattoos that are protection symbols, usually hunters get them.”
“You have one?” Hotch’s upright posture was visibly shaken.
“I'm no hunter.” You said before walking back to the table, Hotch following you. “But yes, I do have one.”
“I’ve never seen a tattoo on you.” Hotch frowns
“That´s because it’s not in a visible spot.” You giggled while turning your back on Hotch to take out another stack of files.
Hotch’s eyes were found unconsciously roaming over your body. He had seen you in the summer, in short skirts and tiny tops, or with risky cleavages, hell he even had seen you in your pajamas when you shared a hotel room once or twice, but he never noticed any tattoos. That can only mean one last place.
Hotch knew you were busy getting the files so his eyes ended up going down your back to your ass, He was positive your tattoo was on your hip or ass.
You could feel Hotch’s eyes going down and up your body, You even turned your back on him longer than needed, so he could linger his sight on you even longer. Anyone could’ve said it was just Hotch’s curiosity but you saw that tiny shade of lust, sparkle in his eyes for a brief moment when you mentioned you having a tattoo.
You turned your body in a slow move and caught him still hypnotized by your body. “Looking for something Hotch?”
“Hips or ass, agent?” He asked with a straight face but his voice showed a hint of playfulness. He was teasing you.
The question made you smirk. “You’re not gonna hear it from me, you’re going to need to find out in another way, Sir.”
But before he could open his mouth to speak, Spencer came back to the room with bad news.
“Another body appeared, no tattoo.”
–
“Body number five, we can barely keep up with this guy.” you heard in the distance.
“Do we know who he is?” Hotch asked.
“Since it matters so much, His friend says he is a salesman.” Weller said, sending a nasty look at you. “No connection.”
“Detective Weller, I would appreciate it if your answer were directed at me. When I ask a question.” Hotch replied.
Weller huffed with irritation and you thought you heard him grumble something, but you’re not sure if he was agreeing with Hotch or cursing you under his breath. “We have five bodies, Agent Hotchner, and no correlation.”
“Okay, all victims were partying late at night with their friends and killed in the alley with no one noticing, how did the unsub manage to get them alone?” Hotch looked at his team, they were all lost in thoughts.
“A woman.” Detective Weller's mocking laughter echoed in the room.
“Let her finish.” It only took the look on Hotch’s eyes to harden, to force Weller to shut up.
“What is the only temptation for a straight man that’s going to lure him away from his friends and make him leave the bar?” Your expecting eyes were moving around glancing at your team’s faces.
“A woman.” Rossi repeated while nodding his head.
Hotch turned on his heels and looked at the detective. “Gather your men, we are ready to give a profile.”
—
“Ready?” Hotch whispered in your ear, making the baby hairs on the back of your neck stand at the sound of his voice.
“What?” You whispered back feeling numb by his closeness.
“Ready to give the profile?”
“Hotch, I’ve never gi-.” Your voice trails off. “I don’t think it is a good idea.”
“It is.” He assured you pushing you to the side and walking to the room full of cops.
Lost in your thoughts you barely felt two hands holding your arms from behind, giving you a light squeeze. “You got this, Kid.” Rossi left your side and followed Hotch in the other precinct's room.
You sighed and took a deep breath. This was your first time profiling a human case, not covering up supernatural events or rehearsing made-up stories. This felt different, good different.
You walked confidently and stood in the middle of the room surrounded by your team.
“We are looking for a woman between 30 and 35, she’s friendly, she’ll lure with charm but kill with rage.” You began your speech, feeling every pair of eyes looking at you with attention. “We believe she kills men to reclaim her power.”
“She probably suffers from low self-esteem but covers it well.” You heard Morgan's voice.
“We believe this woman went through a catastrophic event, that’s when the killing started.” Rossi pointed.
“She has medical training, you should consider EMTs, doctors, or veterinarians.”
“It’s more likely we are dealing with the Aileen Wournos archetype, motivated by paranoia and fear, luring men with sex.” Spencer added.
“She certainly knows the terrain, so be careful out there.” Hotch remarked.
A couple of hours later after the profile, Detective Weller came in a hurry with a piece of paper in an evidence bag.
“Forensics found a letter on the victim's body.” He said handing it over to Hotch. “She’s mocking us.”
“Dear boss, he wanted it. With that sharp tongue and vulgar hand. I thought you’d like to know that another will soon get what he deserves.
Yours truly.”
“That 's weird.” All eyes searched Spencer’s voice. “Typically offenders write letters to be heard. Jack the Ripper bragged about not being caught yet this Unsub isn’t using correspondence to flaunt her latest kill. Only to explain why she did it.” He explained while moving his hands around.
“It’s possible that she considers herself a vigilante. That the man she’s killing deserves to die.” Rossi blurted.
“Then, every kill she’s acting out is a fantasy of revenge or a real revenge?” Everyone in the room returned to their thoughts wondering at Morgan’s question.
You shifted in your place with uncertainty. “Maybe she is contacting us not because we are on the case, but because she believes we understand.” With fingers tapping against the wood, you began to unravel the tiny hints in the letter. “The Unsub wrote, He wanted it as she couldn’t help herself. What if she’s mirroring the man who raped her?”
”Where are the files stored from your Sex Crimes Division?” Hotch looked at Weller’s direction.
The detective stepped out of the room momentarily and returned with a medium-sized carton box with a few files that barely stuck out of the box. “Here they are.”
“That 's it?” You let out with a surprised tone of voice.
After several hours of trying to match your profile with any file in the box, you were exhausted. You decided to take a quick break and enter the bathroom, You locked yourself inside one of the bathroom booths and sighed while your hands held your head.
The sound of the door being opened ripped you out of your pessimistic thoughts. Suddenly a hand left a piece of paper report at your feet, leaving you uncertain on what to do. You tried to thank the person but, you were answered with fast footsteps leaving the place.
You took the paper and read in a whispered voice, Disturbance at Jones.
~~
“Care to tell us what happened then, detective?” Hotch asked.
Detective Weller shifted in his seat with discomfort. “How did you know about this incident?”
“It was in the box you gave us, Weller.” Morgan said while leaning against the wall, looking directly at Weller.
“I don’t think so.”
“Maybe you misplaced it, who cares?” You argued.
He looked at you with disdain. Aaron couldn’t help himself and stepped closer to you showing protection. “This happened when the head detective before me was in charge, I took some of the declarations but that’s it.”
You smirked with satisfaction Knowing you were right all along. “The detective before you as our third victim?” He nodded.
“What happened there, detective?”
“One of the boys asked her if she wanted to play pool. Witnesses claim she was up for anything. His friend, not far behind.“ All the eyes were on him. “He claims she knew he was there, She said she claimed for help but not a single person claimed that they heard her.”
You shook your head in disbelief.
He continued, “That’s why it was registered as a disturbance. She wanted to press charges. But the head detective back then told her it was a waste of time.”
“How is this just a disturbance?” Rossi asked, frowning at Weller.
“As far as I was concerned, no such rape ever took place, and the boy was a colleague’s son, he is a good boy.”
Something in your stomach twisted and anger started to build up.
“We are trying to know her name; she could be our Unsub.” Morgan pointed out. Weller sighed when this realization dawned on him, but he slightly shook his head as he was ashamed of not knowing the answer.
But you were sure shame wasn’t a feeling men like that could understand.
“You don’t remember her name?“ Morgan asked with incredulity.
“It was nine years ago.”
“What about the name of the good kid that raped her?” You bickered.
~~
“Mr. Tibideaux, we need you to answer a few questions about a disturbance you were involved with.“ Hotch’s voice resonated inside the four walls of the interrogation room.
“I don’t know what you are talking about.”
Disgust appeared in your face, but you hid it by biting your tongue. You didn’t know why Hotch asked you to be there, but you hated every minute of it.
“At a bar called Jones, It was Mardi Gras.” Hotch reminded him.
“You know, then I must’ve been drinking or something. Cause I don’t remember a thing.”
With your feet tapping the floor, you were counting the seconds to be able to leave the room and be away from the so-called good boy.
“We just need to know the name of your accuser.” Hotch demanded. If he was annoyed there was no way to know.
“Look, I told you. I don’t know what you are talking about”
You roughly massaged your right temple, fuming.
”The statute of limitations is up, we just need a name.” He added calmly.
“Someone accuses me of rape, I’m gonna remember her name.” You taunted.
“Well, what can I tell you, Cher? I guess she didn’t make that good of an impression.“
Your eyes narrowed dismissively.
”Unlike yourself right now.” You retorted.
“You know. I’m guessing if someone did do something to that girl that night then she was probably asking for it. Maybe even liked it.”
You controlled the urge to smash his head against the table and abruptly took the file out of Hotch’s hands, you opened it and began to display all the victim's photos in front of him.
“You know Hotch, maybe we are not too late, she murdered these men and I’m guessing it’s only a matter of time before she works her way back to the one she really wants to kill.” You tilted your head to look at him but he was busy looking at the pictures with a horrified look. “Is she making an impression now?
Your words suggested you were talking to Hotch but your sight was set on the other man in the room.
“You don’t want to tell us, fine.” You snickered. “Cause Daddy can’t make this go away, and I have no problem waiting for your dead body to give me a new hint.”
You leaned closer, you didn’t have to talk anymore, you knew your eyes were saying enough. But you continued.
“In fact, I wouldn’t like anything else, so I’m gonna go ahead and set my alarm for tomorrow morning when I get the call from the police.” You ranted. “Cause, believe me, I’m going to sleep better knowing there is one less offender out of the streets.”
After hearing the name you needed, you stormed out of the room leaving everyone behind without looking back until you heard a voice calling for you.
“That was out of line, agent.” You abruptly stopped and turned on your heels to look at Weller.
“The only thing out of line is how pathetic you are at doing your job, Weller.” You turned back at him one more time and kept waking till reaching a quiet corner to make a phone call.
“Work me.” You hear Penelope’s voice on your phone.
“We have a name. Sarah Danlin. I need an address.”
“1141 Sherman Avenue. It looks like she was a med student at Tulane but she dropped out.”
“Let me guess, February nine years ago.”
“Yeah.”
“Thanks.”
~~
You returned to the hotel room by Hotchner’s request, and you knew he was in the right to send you back, you got carried away by your emotions.
You were a mess. Closing your room door, you let your emotions overpower you once more. Tears were falling down your face. You weren’t sure what you were feeling. No one ever prepared you for this kind of case, you felt powerless, empty, and lost. And finally, rage possessed your emotions.
You tossed glasses and trails of empty dishes, and your luggage and clothes flew around the room until your energy and strength gave up and tiredness reached you.
You are sure the hotel staff let Hotch know, cause he kept checking with you constantly. He let you know when they arrested her and how she told them she killed every man who helped cover up her abuse.
You heard your door being open and looked at Hotchner with a questioning look when you saw him standing there.
“How did you open my door?”
He showed you his key. “We are sharing.”
You frowned. “Since when?”
“Since now, there has been an unexpected cut in the budget.” You nodded knowing it was a lie and he probably wanted to check on you. But you said nothing.
“Some things fall by themselves, I think there’s a ghost.” You said when you caught him looking at the mess on the floor.
“I think you can manage that.”
He left his duffel bag on the floor and sat next to you on the bed.
“Are you okay?” He asked.
That simple question was enough to break your strong façade. It was a question you normally have no problem answering with a lie, and you didn’t know if it was the situation or just because Hotch was the one asking. But it brought you down to tears.
He took you in his arms and hugged you tight.
“I’m sorry.”
“It 's okay.” He softly mumbled on your head reassuring you. “You said what you needed to say.”
You quickly shook your head.
“I meant it.” You sniffled. “I was willing to wait.”
“I know.” He said while caressing your back with soothing movements.
“So, normally you have to deal with these detectives making your job impossible?”
“Yeah, all the time.” He chuckled.
“God, it’s exhausting.” You laugh a little
“You don’t?”
“No, they basically beg me to take the case out of their hands.”
Hotch sighed. “You need to learn new methods for the interrogation.” He searched for your eyes. “I mean, only if you want to keep coming to these cases with us, you want to?”
“Yeah.” You smiled at him.
“You are a profiler now, welcome to the team.”
~~
Back in Quantico, you were getting ready to leave your office when you got a call from an unknown number. You hesitated but finally answered after letting it ring for a couple of seconds.
“Hello?”
“Hey, sweetheart.”
“Dean?” You frowned looking back at the number.
“We need a little bit of help.” Reality sank on you.
“Tell me you are not calling from where I think you are calling.”
“Agent Henriksen got to us.”
“Damn it, Dean, How the heck did he manage to do that?”
“Bella Talbot.”
“That bitch again?” You sighed. “Where are you?”
“Colorado.”
“I’m on my way.”
#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#dean winchester#fanfic#fem!reader#sam winchester#series#slow burn#supernatural#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotch fluff#aaron hotch smut#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner fanfiction#aaron hotchner imagine#derek morgan#penelope garcia#david rossi#spencer reid#jenifer jareau#emily prentiss#multifandom writer#bau team#the winchester brothers
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The Hunter and the Witch ~ Dean Winchester x fem! reader
Description: y/n l/n (aka reader) has known the Winchesters ever since they helped her family start anew, away from a town that hated them for being witches. Or more specifically for y/n being a witch and accidentally causing mayhem. So when Dean comes knocking at her door asking for help she obviously complies, even if it means being stuck on the road with the man she’s secretly in love with.
Or it’s basically just y/n following the adventures of Supernatural
warnings: cannon violence, most likely poor representation of witch craft, everything written is fiction and should not be taken seriously
Prologue
Playlist
Outfits
Season 1
Chapter 1: The Woman in White
Special: Halloween Drive
Chapter 1~ Continuation
Chapter 2: Wendigo
Chapter 3: Dead In the Water
Chapter 4: Phantom Traveler
Chapter 4.5: Can you Promise Me?
Chapter 5: Bloody Mary
Chapter 6: Skin
Chapter 6.5: You’re not him
Chapter 7: Hook Man
Chapter 7.5: A fool in love
Chapter 8: Home
Chapter 8.5: Reunion
Chapter 9: Asylum
Chapter 10: Scarecrow
Chapter 10.5: Rest
Chapter 11: Faith
Chapter 12: Route 666
Chapter 13: Nightmare
Chapter 13.5: Words mean more at night
Chapter 14: The Benders
Chapter 15: Shadow
Chapter 16: Hell House
Chapter 17: Something Wicked
#fanfiction#dean winchester#sam winchester#supernatural#witchcraft#slow burn#dean winchester x reader#supernatural x reader#supernatural season 1#witch reader#the hunter and the witch#masterlist#supernatural masterlist#supernatural series#dean winchester x female!reader#dean winchester x reader series#dean winchester x f!reader series#dean winchester x f!reader#john winchester#the hunter and the witch update#dean winchester x witch reader#winchester x reader#romance#dean winchester x you#supernatural fanfiction#writing
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honestly george rexstrew and jayden revri have such chemistry onscreen and offscreen that they've hit me with the michael sheen/david tennant effect of "what do you mean they won't be acting alongside each other in everything for the rest of their careers??" like they are a set, please don't separate them.
#dead boy detectives#jayden revri#george rexstrew#david tennant#michael sheen#btw if ur seeing this post as a MS or DT fan who hasn't seen dead boy detectives#please PLEASE go watch the show#it's queer and supernatural and neil gaiman and slow burn and best friends please#i beg#good omens
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no hate but I will never understand “Dean loved Cas first” truthers 😭 Dean had some big picture shit to worry about in season 4 like I don’t think Cas was like. his main focus. Maybe there was some tension, but I’ve never read Dean’s actions in season 4 as really having anything to do with actually being in love with Cas.
Meanwhile I canot imagine an interpretation of Castiel’s arc in season 4 that does not fundamentally revolve around him falling in love with Dean.
#spn#destiel#supernatural#dean winchester#castiel#idk just thoughts for fun lol#it’s so obvious that cas fell first. Dean was a slow burn.
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forcing my eyes to stay open to read fanfiction like its a mandatory assignment due tonight
#i have actual assignments that i never stay up for#but my 89397th destiel slow burn?#this MUST be finished TONIGHT.#fanfiction#fanfic#supernatural#destiel#fandom#ao3
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A Battle of Fates
Y/n is just a regular girl whose dreams are haunted by the devil each night. When these dreams become a reality and she is forced to face her intertwined fate with Lucifer, her world is turned upside down. She is forcefully given the gift of grace and must learn to live with her new found powers with the help of two hunters and their angel. Will she choose to give into her destiny of loving the devil, or will she choose her own fate with a certain Winchester brother?
This story is 18+
This is a slow burn fic that has two endings which allows the reader to choose Dean or Lucifer. The reader is written as female, but descriptions are kept ambiguous to look like anyone.
Characters/pairings: Lucfier x reader, Dean Winchester x reader, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Crowley.
General warnings for this story: Graphic violence, smut, and swearing. Other warnings may apply to specific chapters.
(Thank you to my editor and bestie, Tommy)
Chapter 1 - Dream a Little Dream of Me
Chapter 2 - A Gift From the Devil
Chapter 3 - Intruders & Trenchcoats
Chapter 4 - A Winchester Welcome
Chapter 5 - The Bearer of Bad News
Chapter 6 - A Lesson in Enochian
Chapter 7 - Secrets Secrets Are No Fun
Chapter 8 - Clipped Wings
Chapter 9 - Cat’s Out
Chapter 10 - Alone Again
Chapter 11 - Desperate Times
Chapter 12 - A Deal With the Devil
Chapter 13 - Revelations
Chapter 14 - A Battle of Fates
Chapter 15 - Defying Fate (Dean’s Ending)
Chapter 16 - To Eternity (Lucifer’s Ending)
Full Masterlist
#dean winchester x reader#dean x reader#dean winchester#lucifer x reader#lucifer x reader supernatural#lucifer supernatural#castiel#crowley#sam winchester#fanfiction#supernatural fanfic#supernatural fanfiction#spn#spn fic#slow burn#smut#love triangle#choices#reader insert
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FATAL ATTRACTION MASTERLIST
summary: Sera Salvatore moved to Beacon Hills for a break from the supernatural. But her life was once again turned upside down when she and her two best friends get thrown head first into a world of werewolves and mystery. But it’s hard for her to protect her friends when a single werewolf bite is what could kill her for good…
( you can also read this on my ao3 or my wattpad )
CHAPTERS:
PROLOGUE
1:1 WOLF MOON ( pt. 1 )
1:1 WOLF MOON ( pt. 2 )
└──────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────────┘
#stiles stilinski#fatal attraction#teen wolf#crossover au#tvd#the vampire diaries#derek hale#scott mccall#isaac lahey#sera salvatore#damon salvatore#stefan salvatore#tyler lockwood#klaus mikaelson#stiles stilinski x reader#vampire#werewolf#supernatural#slow burn#fluff#angst#smut#full length fic#the originals#vampire!oc
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Spotless: Obbligato
Chapter Twenty Nine
Featuring: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean/Bela
Other characters: Tiny, Crowley, and Sera the venue lady, both bands in the background, faceless fans
Word Count: 3162
Warnings, etc: Mutual pining, mention of past Dean/Annie, friends who do not have the whole picture and are therefore quicker to judge each other aka drama
Series Masterlist
You exhaled and put your phone in your back pocket. Donna was dancing on the side of the stage closest to you, swaying with her guitar, ruby red lips smiling bright. It was a stark difference to the mindset the two bands had been in only an hour ago. God, everyone had been so scared. You felt like you should be doing damage control, but with investors and who’s-who’s brushing elbows in the VIP you had to save face. No one could know Dean had been missing.
Not even Bela.
Naturally, she found that moment to reappear. “Everything alright?”
You shook your head to clear your thoughts and smiled. “‘Course. Find anything good?”
She smiled wickedly at you and handed you a proper martini from the bar. “We’ll see, won’t we?”
Once you had a good handle on your cup, she held hers up and you clinked the glasses together. “Cheers.”
You took a big gulp and winced at the amount of olive juice, but the burn of the Gin more than made up for it. “Uh, yeah, cheers.”
Bela giggled and turned to watch as SPS finished their set. They were slowly wedging their ways into PT’s fans’ hearts and playlists. You had seen some chatter from the fan pages, plus Becky had posted a lot of supportive tweets about them once it was announced they would be along for the whole tour. It was easy to see them keeping in touch after this tour, they already felt like family.
It was only the second night and this tour was shaping up to be something memorable, something pivotal, maybe even historic.
“They’re killer,” Bela seemed to be reading your thoughts.
“Yeah.”
“You said they’re Canadian?”
“Well, mostly. They’re based in Vancouver, but Patience and Jody are from the U.S.”
“Huh. And it was Dean’s call to have them join on?” Bela played with her cocktail spear as she spoke, the stadium around you moved as a whole in the intermission.
“Well, he suggested ‘em. The suits make all the real calls.” You took another sip, feeling like she was going somewhere with this.
“Naturally. Well, that was— progressive of him.”
You felt your face drop in surprise.
“What?!” She asked like you were the one being rude.
“Why did you say that like that?” You felt oddly defensive of SPS all of the sudden.
“I didn’t mean anything bad— I wasn’t disparaging the other band, Y/N. I was just saying— that it was a good mark of his character. It was meant to be a compliment— I swear.”
You exhaled.
She reached over and squeezed your forearm. “You need to relax, love.”
You nodded, still a little dazed by the dred that had crept out of her best intentions. “I need a fucking nap, but this’ll do for now.”
Bela hummed in agreement.
The VIP attendees doubled the closer Phantom Traveler’s set loomed. You made sure to stay close to the edges and to keep Bela within Tiny’s range. The amount of gawkers that had needed to be escorted along were weighing at the back of your worries. But you trusted security to do their job, you had enough to monitor as it was.
You and Bela took a few selfies with the stage in the background while you waited, both of you falling into the trap of your phones until the lights signaled it was time for the show to start. From somewhere backstage Lee’s voice reached across the stadium and welcomed everybody for the night. The opening bars of ‘Black’ started, which meant Dean and Sam were starting this one off together and then everyone started to scream over the first verse and Dean’s husky opening. But between the love of the song and the dramatics of Charlie’s lighting you couldn’t blame them.
They were solid. Though Dean was ultra focused, less playful than the show the night before.
You weren’t the only one who noticed the change. “Looks a little pale up there, doesn’t he?”
You spun on your heels and smiled brightly at Crowley. “Hello! Sorry I didn’t see you come up. Bela, this is Mr. Crowley from the label.”
“Charmed,” Crowley replied, leaning down to kiss Bela’s outstretched knuckles. “Dick said you were lovely and you’d be sticking around, but I just had to see it for myself.”
“Did he? Well I’m glad to hear Mr. Roman is on Team Tal-chester,” Bela snarked back.
“Aren’t we all?” Crowley deadpanned.
Oh, this was going to give you a migraine. Dean’s voice spoke to the crowd, but you couldn’t spare the attention to hear the introduction to the next song. You had to be focused on what was happening in front of you.
Bela asked about Gavin, who she had met in passing the night before. Crowley was as smug as ever, and gave little besides slight jabs and open ended questions back.
“How are things looking now that the tour has started?” You jumped on the first business notion that came to mind.
Crowley’s dark eyes danced from you and back to Bela, almost chagrined to talk shop. “Pre-orders of the album are up twelve percent since last week. But, uh, let’s talk ticket sales and press junkets on Monday, shall we? Don’t want to miss the rest of the show that we’ve all been waiting so patiently for.”
You gave him the grace to step away, maybe too easily. “Of course, I’ll be on the call from the hotel in San Diego.”
“Right. Well, goodnight ladies, I hope it is— fruitful for you both.”
You and Bela both plastered on your best smiles and waved nervously until he was out of sight.
“What a git,” Bela muttered.
You couldn’t disagree, but suddenly you were hit with a burst of applause. Dean’s voice was crooning, holding a note from one of the new songs and then everyone stomped on the last note.
“‘Pushing Through’ everybody,” Dean said simply and pulled back to let Lee take the front of the stage.
Kicking yourself for missing the live premiere, you nodded Bela closer to the ledge to get a better view of the stage, while hopefully minimizing your distractions. Tiny followed four paces back, large and lurking, ever present and professional.
Lee chatted the crowd up and then they slid into ‘Breakdown’ from their third album which was about a tour bus’ flat tire and also about how they first started noticing Sam’s struggle with the harder stuff. Pam kept the drums going as they moved into ‘Lost and Found’, their first ever single. The song that got them noticed by Crossroads in the first place.
By the time they dove into ‘No Regerts’, a tongue-in-cheek song that only made it on the same album as ‘Breakdown’ as a hidden crack track, Dean was looking more alive on stage. That irresistible smile was noticeable even from two levels up. Pam and Kevin walked them out of that song with an almost marching fanfare, spirits were up.
You tried to breathe and forget about Crowley.
‘Twigs and Twine’ set up nicely into a cover of ‘Funk 49’ by the James Gang, which everyone really had fun with. Dean ended up practically jiving with Pamela as she rocked out with the blocks. Lee added his own little drawls to the familiar riffs, which you knew meant he was having a blast. You slowly let go of the panic Dean’s absence had caused, but the knowing glint in Crowley’s eyes was harder to shake. The energy on stage was even drawing in the uppity-ups in VIP.
You were so proud how the band had come together, yet again to give it their all.
For some reason, Bela continued to hit each of your raw nerves. Nothing she said or did was actually offensive, but somehow her very presence felt like a burden. When she gestured that she was going to go mingle during ‘Damned’ from their third album you just rolled your eyes, but nodded that you’d be okay where you were. Tiny was keeping her in his sights anyway, no reason you had to abandon the show to socialize with people you never fit in with in the first place.
Sam burst through the tail end of ‘Damned’ with a line both funky and familiar and the way Dean and Lee whipped their heads around you would have thought it was a shock. But you also knew that Sam knew better than to fuck with his brother’s setlists. They were just playing it up that Sam went from a song off the album that marked his darkest days to a feel good number from their first album. ‘So Co in So Cal’ was laid back and celebratory, a summer drinking song at its finest.
You raised your glass and danced in place, feeling the rhythm and loving the way the band slipped into the emotions of each song. Two songs later and before you realized it, they were welcoming Annie onto the stage for the last official number.
Bela returned as Annie was greeting the crowd, while effortlessly teasing Dean just like the night before.
“They’ve got quite the chemistry, don’t you think?” Bela’s voice appeared beside you.
“Yeah, but nobody can call your bullshit like family,” you agreed.
Bela smirked. “I know chemistry like that, Y/N, especially amongst performers. And those two have seen each other naked, nobody looks at each other with that kind of devilish mirth without having done the deed.”
You couldn’t help but laugh, that was ridiculous. She was like their aunt! But then the conversation the teens at the animal shelter had way back when popped into your mind about Sam and Annie having a fling. And as pissy as Cas’ niece was, she wasn’t a liar. Something like dread washed down your back and settled traitorously in your stomach.
Bela just gave you a ‘I told you so’ look and turned to watch the duet.
You felt like you didn’t know Dean at all. Not that it mattered who he slept with, that really wasn’t your business. But Annie married Bobby. It was weird to set up your surrogate uncle with an old fling, wasn’t it?
Not to mention Sam. Wait which one went first? Did they share? Your brain spiraled into chaos scenarios and you needed air. You figured there was twenty minutes of encores to come, so you bowed out of the VIP and told Bela you were going to make sure the signing room was set up.
Smiling at the venue security as you went, the agenda for the rest of the night took over inside your mind. Autos and afterparty, the real private afterparty with the band’s inner circle. Making sure everyone knew when check out was and when to meet at the busses. Touring was like riding a bike, this time you just had to keep Bela on your radar and make sure her and Dean made nice with the fans. Everyone else you trusted. Not that you didn’t trust Bela, or Dean, for that matter, it was just the focal point. Their relationship’s success held your professional reputation in its grasp.
And Crowley knew it.
The venue had done a better job creating a flowing line for that night’s autographs. So you just carefully counted chairs and security guards to kill time. Sera burst in just as you heard the heavy thunder of stomping feet signal the true end of the show. You smiled at her and made small talk. She seemed ready to be rid of you, and the band, more than accommodating, but you didn’t take it personally. You knew how stressful it was coordinating these things. That she, too, had people she had to answer to.
The winners from the local radio station were escorted in first, followed by some of the higher ups in the fanclub, and people who paid through the nose for the opportunity. You smiled and nodded at the few who waved at you. Some of the fan club recognized you from a spotlight Becky did on you for her newsletter before the last tour.
It was odd to have such an active and loyal group of fans in the social media age, but somehow PT inspired it more than most.
Then a wave of cheering and clapping broke you out of your thoughtful appreciation. Kevin led the way as the band smiled and high fived their way behind the row of tables. Sam must have just put on a tank top, though sweat dampened even the fresh fabric where it clung to his abs and between his shoulder blades. Pamela rocked a pair of shades that she probably grabbed off one of the security guards. A signature move of hers that she adapted after the one tour when Cas almost blinded her with the old shaving cream prank.
God, you missed him and all his pierced glory.
Shaking your head, you waited as Lee posed for quick selfies with the group at the front of the line. That only left Dean. Spotting Bobby rounding the corner you made a beeline behind the band’s chairs.
“Where is he this time?” you demanded.
Bobby huffed. “Your bestie asked for a ‘quick mo’.”
You groaned. “Of course she did.”
But before you rifled up the nerve to go interrupt whatever they were up to, Dean appeared from the opposite direction of the dressing rooms with Donna and the rest of SPS behind him. He smiled at you like a petulant child and squeezed your shoulder as he slid past the fans and down to his seat at the far end of the row.
You exhaled and tried to keep your face optimistic as the opening band also gave you apologetic faces. The meet and greet passed in a blur. Just before the mingling portion was set to wrap up, Bela slinked in with a fresh wave of perfume and a killer’s glint in her eyes. You grabbed her by the elbow before she could interrupt Dean and Sam making nice with a set of four college-aged girls in matching PT swag.
“Hey, just give them a few more minutes and we can all head to the afterparty together.”
“It is so dull waiting around, can’t I just pop in for some photos, too?”
You tried not to make a face, but Bela knew you too well to hide your annoyance from her.
“Come on, Y/N. It’ll be alright. Guards at every exit, don’t worry.”
“I’m not worried about the fans, I’m worried you’ll make a scene. Dean’s not the only member of the band, they all like time with the fans.”
“Make a scene? You do not want to challenge me to cause a ruckus, dear.”
You closed your eyes and bowed your head, releasing your hold on her arm. “That’s not what I meant, just leave him be for a few more minutes. Okay?”
Bela seemed to weigh her options and conceded. “Fine, but we’re taking my driver to the hotel and not bothering with the hired muscle.”
“We or you two?” you clarified.
“The happy couple,” she said with all teeth.
You nodded and gestured for her to head back the way she came, probably the dressing room, since the VIP had probably been cleared out by the venue staff at that point. Once the fans were escorted out of the space, you reminded the band to clear out the dressing room. Benny had a platform dolly waiting for their concert baggage and gear.
You needed some air, so you decided to wait for everyone outside, which was better than trying to navigate the parking garage like a civilian. Naturally, Bela and Tiny spotted you as they stood on the curb beside a freshly detailed limo.
“Is he coming?” Bela bellowed, her words were surprisingly slightly foggy from the late night chill.
“Gotta clear out the dressing room,” you said as you approached, arms wrapped around yourself to keep warm.
Groups of people still littered the sidewalk and walked by, trying to decipher which car that was double parked was their ride.
“You know you baby him too much, he doesn’t need a nanny. He’s a grown man,” Bela said, seemingly out of nowhere.
“It’s kind of my job, so—.” You shrugged it off.
“No, it isn’t,” she said firmly.
Christ, you were so over tagging along and it was only the second show she was scheduled to make an appearance.
“Listen, you know what’s been going on, it’s better for me to be ahead of anything than to play clean up.”
“Or you just like to be in everybody’s pocket.”
Your head snapped up to glare at her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Look, Y/N. I’ve been around awhile and it’s not with everybody, all the time.--- I don’t know if it’s leftover guilt or what, but you literally insert yourself into every minute of Dean’s life. Even when you’re not there, you’re there. And no matter what you do, how hard you work, or how much you care it’s not going to bring Jo back.”
You recoiled like she slapped you across the face.
There were no words for how far she had taken it, how much it hit every single one of your insecurities. You were a busybody, a hanger-on. Nothing could fix the past. You had taken away any chance for Dean to be happy. You had killed your best friend.
But she hadn’t said what the worst of it. The dirty little secret that you weren’t able to keep from the likes of Cas or Bobby, the people who truly knew Dean. And that was how you felt about him, how much you wanted him to look at you the way Bela claimed he looked at Annie.
You tried to dispute it, but the words caught in your throat as the tears burned in your eyes. Tiny approached and cleared his throat, warning you of an approaching crowd. The nearest exit burst open and a rush of photographers appeared around the corner, as the band and their crew made a beeline for their waiting vehicles. Dean had thrown on a jacket, collar popped high as he kept the paps at arm’s length.
You cleared your throat. “I don’t know what your problem is, but we put a lid on it for the rest of the night, got it?”
“Happily,” Bela replied, not looking at you but at the wave of reporters and flashing cameras as they followed Dean’s progress to the curb.
You watched dumbfounded as he kissed her hello, nodded over her shoulder at you, then held the door of the limo open for her to crawl inside. Tiny kept the vultures at bay and you followed him to a discreet SUV around the corner where Annie, Bobby, and Victor waited.
At least somebody cared that you had a ride.
Tagging:
@deans-spinster-witch
@mrswhozeewhatsis
@cosicas-cuquis
@fics-pics-andotherthings-i-like
@suckitands33
@ladysparkles78
@deans-baby-momma
@stoneyggirl2
@sassy-pelican
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@winharry
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@coldhearted93
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@beautiful-places-blog
@n-o-p-e-never
Chapter 30: Larghetto
#spotless series#dean winchester fanfiction#dean/reader#dean/bela#rockstar au#fake dating#slow burn#dean angst#spn au#spn fanfic#supernatural fanfiction#dean x reader#dean x you#rockstar!Dean
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the comforts of creatures (5)
creature comforts:
↳ material/bodily comforts, such as food, warmth, or special accommodations, that contribute to physical ease and well-being
→ pairing: ot7 x fem.reader
→ genre: supernatural!au, soulmate!au, hurt + comfort + recovery, angst with a happy ending, fluff, eventual smut
→ word count: 4.8k
→ summary: you learn what you are, and your reaction is far from what they expected. as they try to help you feel safe, the boys learn about your triggers, and they try their hardest to help in any way they can.
→ trigger/content warnings: PTSD (self-loathing, mistrust, flashbacks/nightmares) effects of brainwashing, lil’ bit of lore, overt and internalized racism/species-ism (?), vomiting, anxiety, mentions of starvation/food poisoning, mentions of physical abuse, dissociation, mentions of torture, aversion to touch, mc pushes jimin but he’s okay, jimin is an angel, facial/body scars, body dysmorphia/repulsion
→ a/n: thank y’all for your patience :) here’s some more hurt before the comfort lol
past part ← series masterlist → next part
part 5: scars and soothers
“This is you.”
The man is pointing at a detailed image drawn in faded ink. The rest of the page is filled with scripted text and anatomical diagrams.
You can’t look at first, scared of what you’ll find.
When you finally do, you don’t know what to think. There’s the thought that he’s kidding, he’s lying. He can’t be serious.
The drawing is of a creature with tawny-feathered wings extending magnificently in the air. It has the body of a powerful big cat, muscular yet elegant. Its four legs end in sharp-taloned feet. Its neck is framed by a golden mane, looking like a big frilly collar. The mane’s trail travels down the creature’s chest and back, ending in a flowing tail. It has the face of a lion, with white whiskers and deep yellow eyes, yet the regal posture of an eagle.
A diagram off to the left shows the inside of its mouth, lined with row upon row of sharp teeth and protruding fangs.
Looking back up, you search the faces of the men around you. None of them appear to be joking.
You can’t speak.
You’re one of them, one of the creatures they all despised. The creatures that roam the wild lands for easy prey, spreading carnage wherever they go.
No wonder they hated you so much. You’re not even human.
A few silent, involuntary tears fall from your eyes, which are locked back on the page. You wipe them away hastily.
The boys don’t know how to react, all looking at each other with concern.
“What...” you squeak out, voice choked. “What is it?”
“A gryffin,” Yoongi replies. “You’re a shifter.”
Something gurgles in your stomach. You clench your teeth, nails digging deep into the meat of your thighs.
You believe him. You don’t want to, but you believe him. You’ve always felt less than human, like something wasn’t right about you. Like something was just beneath the surface, clawing its way up.
Now you know why.
Jungkook, who’s sitting closest to you, slowly, cautiously puts his hand on your shoulder in an effort to comfort you.
But you flinch at his touch, jerking away.
You don’t catch the look of hurt that flits across his face. He knows you can’t help it, but it still stings to think that his touch physically repels you.
“What did they tell you about atypicals?” Namjoon presses, trying to shift your attention so you won’t look so disheartened by the reality of what you are.
From the way you look at him, he knows that you’ve never heard that word before. Or at least you don’t remember it.
“Atypicals are anything that falls out of the humanic species,” he explains patiently.
Your face scrunches in confusion.
“Humanic as in human,” he elaborates.
You don’t understand why he’s talking like that. You’ve never heard these terms before. In the place you came from, the “facility,” anything that wasn’t human was an abomination, a mistake in the eyes of nature.
Simple as that.
But here, things seem to be a bit more complicated.
Nausea is starting to bubble in your gut. You breathe carefully through your nose as you consider Namjoon’s question.
“They said...” you begin hesitantly.
They’re all on the edge of their seats, desperately wondering what those bastards brainwashed you to believe about their kind, your own kind.
“They said that they were monsters.”
Another pang of hurt thrums through their hearts.
“That...that they deserved to be hunted down like dogs.”
They can hear the pain in your own voice, either from witnessing their cruel behavior, or from realizing that you’ve been the target of it this whole time.
Your stomach churns.
“They said I wasn’t even worthy to lick the ground they walked on.”
They can all hear you choking on your tears, despite your attempts to hide it.
Jimin and Jungkook feel like their chests are going to burst from holding it in, both the sorrow they feel for you and the urge to rush forward and drown you in affection.
Jin and Namjoon have storms raging inside their heads. Namjoon is calculating, trying to decode what exactly their motive was and how to use it to track down the ones in charge of it all. Jin’s mind is reeling with ways to undo the damage they’ve done, mentally and physically.
Yoongi is swimming waist-deep in despair. He can’t help but think of what’s to come. You’ll have to relearn everything. How to shift, how to fight, how to cast. That is, if you even want to.
You feel the newly strung tension in the air, looking like you just realized you said all of those things out loud.
One look around the room, and your newly found voice retreats deep into your throat.
The man called Namjoon, his eyes have darkened, jaw clenched and ticking like he’s grinding his teeth.
The one who tended to your wounds is sitting stiffly in his chair, staring ahead with a new sharpness in his face.
The small dark-haired man has his hands clenched, prominent veins crawling up his arms.
You duck your head down, body stiff with nerves.
“You have to know,” Yoongi begins, voice calm as ever despite the rage just below the surface. “That’s not how most people think. Especially not here.”
Here in the North Regions, atypicals make up the majority of the population. Law enforcement, government, and public works are largely run by them, and prejudice is rarely an issue.
But how could you know that now?
They can all see the change. It’s almost instantaneous, the way your face shifts and loses all semblance of emotion. Just like that, the mask is back up.
Then there’s something else. A slight twitch from your nose, a well-hidden shudder. They can see your throat bobbing.
For a few seconds, it looks like you’re about to say something. Your tongue is moving inside your mouth, and you’re blinking rapidly.
Namjoon is about to utter some gentle encouragement, but a jolt racks through your body, making you hunch over.
All of a sudden you’re vomiting up everything you just ate.
Hoseok, Jungkook and Jimin can’t help but jump to their feet, panicked noises filling the air.
Taehyung’s eyes widen. All his limbs go rigid, paralyzing him in his seat. He feels sick himself.
Jin, Namjoon, and Yoongi all look at each other.
Yoongi thrusts into action, heading to the kitchen with Jungkook in tow since he isn’t good around pungent-smelling things.
Namjoon starts giving instructions. Jimin, paper towels. Hobi, get the mop. Said men jolt into action, scrambling to do whatever they can to help.
Jin’s eyes have been fixed on you for some time now, catching your every move, including all the suppressed flinches and tremors.
He’s at your side in an instant, on his knees to try to catch your eyes. But it’s no use, you’re squeezing your eyes shut like you’re expecting to be hit.
“It’s okay, it’s okay,” he mutters in his gentlest voice. “It’s no big deal. No one is upset with you.”
As much as he wants to, he refrains from touching you right away.
Eyes still tightly shut, you flinch away from the sound of his voice, twitching with anxiety.
Jin can see you start to spiral, so he does the only thing he knows will work.
“Hey,” he begins, voice firmer than it was before. “Look at me.”
Your eyes snap open, shining with moisture.
“That’s my girl,” Jin says before he can help it. “You’re going to calm down for me, yeah?”
Your eyes desperately search his face, looking for any sign of anger or deception. You find none, not even a hint of disgust, and your breathing starts to slow.
All that’s there is the man who tended to your wounds, watching you with those patient eyes. His handsome face is calm, attentively anticipating whatever you need right now.
Sweat gathers on your skin. That same sensation crawls up your throat, saliva pooling in your mouth.
Jin notices the signs immediately.
“Come with me,” he orders softly, putting a light hand on your back and leading you to the nearest bathroom.
You don’t know what to do with yourself.
You remember vomiting a few times at the facility. Once from eating a rotten vegetable, the mold making it impossible to identify. And once when a handful of keepers had held you down, repeatedly punching you in the stomach, until you gave in and called yourself a mutt.
Both times you were severely punished for making a mess. You learned to hold it in your mouth and swallow it down after that.
Jin guides you to kneel over the toilet. He keeps talking to you, but you only process half of what he’s saying.
“Go ahead, let it out,”
You can feel it creeping up, burning and sour. But something deeper, something almost instinctual, tells you to keep it down.
“Stop holding it in, sweetheart,” he says, rubbing soothing circles on your back. “It’s not good for you. It’s okay to let go.”
Before you can think to suppress it, another wave of nausea surges through your body. The crescendo of it makes you wretch, emptying the last of your stomach’s contents.
“Good, good, just get it all out,” he encourages instead of beating you until you can’t breathe.
The bile is bitter in your mouth, but not more bitter than the dread clinging to your entire being.
He’s not going to punish me, you finally realize. It’s almost an impossible thought.
For a moment, you stay hunched over, frozen. Not sure what to do next.
“Here, come wash your mouth out,” Jin says, helping you stand up on shaky legs.
The sound of running water rings in your ears. You feel the coolness against your tongue, but barely register that you’re the one cupping it to your lips. Numb. You feel like you’re controlling your body from the outside rather than the inside.
“Now, let’s get you cleaned up, okay?”
You look up at him for the first time in a while. His face is as kind as it was before, with the same full-lipped smile and warm brown eyes.
The man starts to lead you out of the room, that same gentle hand resting on your back.
It isn’t until then that you realize you’re still in the grimy clothes they found you in. And now the entire front of your shirt is stained with even more filth.
You glance into the living room as you pass through the hallway.
The other men are diligently cleaning the area you just soiled. The small dark-haired man and the muscular man are missing, though you can hear rustling from the kitchen.
The one with the jet black hair and bright face catches your eye, flashing a reassuring smile. It makes you rip your eyes away.
Jin guides you into the living room, and everyone immediately looks your way.
Shrinking, you’re shrinking into yourself as much as your body will allow.
“Someone run a bath,” Jin announces. “I think it’s time our little guest got some sleep in clean clothes.”
The fair-haired one steps forward and exchanges a subtle look with Jin, who’s standing slightly behind you.
“Would you follow me?” the shorter man says, holding out his hand.
It’s the one with the silver-gray hair and warm eyes. You think his name is Jimin. His face is soft and friendly. It asks a silent question: will you trust me?
You don’t take his hand, but you do take a step up the stairs in the direction he’s leading you.
You don’t catch it, but Jimin and Jin exchange a heartfelt glance, nearly ecstatic at the fact that you’re beginning to trust them.
Jimin leads you up the stairs as the rest of them settle things downstairs.
When you reach the top, he guides you down a spacious hallway that’s filled with potted plants and window light.
Every single door, down to the very end of the hall, is open. Whether it’s open wide or just a crack, not one of them is closed or locked. You’re not used to it.
The man, Jimin, stops at a door halfway down the hall and looks back to check if you’re still following him.
You stop a few feet away from him, still keeping your distance, but your expression is open and neutral, waiting on his next move.
He gives you a calm smile, and continues into the room with you behind him.
This room is just as bright and inviting as the rest of the house. White walls and clean tile floors, but this time with a large porcelain tub and a sink with marble countertops.
The man turns to look at you with a question in his eyes.
“Shower or bath?” he asks.
It’s a harmless question, a considerate question. But your mind is yanked back to that place.
Shower. A torrent of fire raining down on you, vision blinded by steam. It comes from every angle, unrelenting no matter how much you scream.
They would strip you down and lock you in a metal stall the size of a coffin. Then the dotted ceiling would unleash a downpour of near-boiling water.
You would bang on the walls, but the water made the metal surface just as hot, the floor burning the bottom of your feet. Minutes or hours they kept you in there, not letting you out until your body was covered in burn marks.
Bath. The most intense cold you’ve ever felt. It’s everywhere, submerging you up to the neck, seeping down to your very bones.
They would chain you down in a tub full of ice, nothing but your head poking out of the frigid water. The cold chains cut into your skin the more you struggled. Your lungs would heave from the shock of it, your whole body shivering violently.
Then they would hold your head underwater until you were bucking like a stuck pig. This went on until you were utterly exhausted, falling limp against the freezing porcelain with nothing but the tight chains holding you up.
You’re snapped back to reality when the man takes a step closer. He’s watching you closely, trying to read your face.
Finally remembering that he asked you a question, you shrug your shoulders and shake your head.
You don’t want either. You don’t want to be anywhere near that tub. You want him to leave you alone.
Jimin guesses that the gesture means you don’t care which one. He figures you’re most likely still weak from malnourishment, and he doesn’t want you fainting and hitting your head.
So he opts for a bath, turning on the faucet. He sits on the edge of the tub, hand under the spout to monitor the temperature.
The sound of running water makes every muscle in your body tense up. The hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.
It’s going to hurt, it’s going to hurt. The fire, the ice, it’s going to burn and sting and cut into your flesh. You won’t be able to escape it.
Jimin doesn’t notice it at first, too focused on adjusting the knobs to get the water not too hot and not too cold, but your breathing has picked up again.
You can already feel it filling your ears, your mouth, rushing down your throat as your head is held down. Your skin prickles from the heat, it quivers from the cold.
The water in the tub continues to rise, and you can’t move. Your body is frozen, feet rooted to the floor as the sound of sloshing roars louder and louder in your ears.
Halfway full, now. It’s coming any second. He’s going to turn on you, throw you down and hold you under.
Burning, freezing. It’ll hurt and hurt and hurt.
Jimin turns his head, and his stomach drops.
Your eyes are squeezed shut, lips pursed like you’re trying to bite back a scream. Fists clenched at your sides, shoulders trembling, as your chest heaves up and down.
Immediately, he jumps to his feet and rushes over to you.
“What is it, babe? What’s wrong?”
Then he makes a big mistake. He puts his hands on you.
His touch is gentle, nonthreatening, nothing but two hands on your shoulders. But you don’t want it, you’re repulsed by it. Because touch always comes before the pain.
On instinct, your body jerks away, arms moving to push the unwelcome touch away, just get it away. Your hands collide against something, hard.
When you open your eyes, the man is on the floor. Sprawled on his back, looking up at you with wide, slightly watery eyes.
There’s shock plastered on both of your faces.
Jimin’s soft heart hurts a little, he can’t help it. In all the years he’s known you, loved you, you’ve never ever been repelled by him. But that hurt is soon drowned by guilt.
He scared you, he made you feel unsafe. You felt the need to protect yourself and it’s his fault.
You’re staring at your hands in horror, completely floored by what you’ve done. You’re in for it now. He tried to help you and you hurt him. Now they’re going to hurt you even more.
Several sets of pounding footsteps draw near. The others must have heard the thud from downstairs and rushed up to see what was wrong.
What they don’t expect to find is Jimin crumpled on the floor and you standing over him in a braced position, but that’s exactly what they see when they peer through the doorway.
They’re all a little astonished, Jin and Namjoon are thinking deeply, and something in Taehyung’s eyes shifts.
He isn’t proud of it, but a surge of protectiveness washes over him, for his Jimin. He knows it’s unreasonable, unfair even. But it’s still there. And he can’t snuff it out.
A new fear consumes you. You were insubordinate, you resisted. You know what comes next.
A sob gets trapped in your throat as you sink down to the floor, burying your head in-between your knees and using your arms to shield yourself.
Immediately, the same way Jimin did, they all rush forward to comfort you.
“No!” Jimin blurts out, making you flinch and shake violently. “Don’t touch, give her some space.”
They all obey, keeping their distance with concern flooding their features.
Jimin shifts onto his knees, scooting a little closer but still keeping enough away.
“I’m sorry,” he nearly whispers, like he’s talking to a wild, cornered animal. “It was my fault entirely. I shouldn’t have touched you. I’m truly sorry.”
Jimin’s voice has always been soothing, even in the darkest times, and your breathing slows a little.
Jimin realizes that the faucet is still running, and he reaches over to switch it off. Then it comes to him.
He turns back to your trembling form, still waiting for the pain to come.
“You’re scared of the water, aren’t you?” he asks gently.
He doesn’t expect you to reply, he just wants to let you know that he’s trying to understand you, to help you.
You nod slightly.
It shocks them all again. You’re becoming more responsive.
“I’m so, so sorry,” Jimin says with all the sincerity he can muster. “It’s not your fault. I promise I won’t do that again.”
Your shoulders gradually stop trembling, breath coming evenly now.
Jimin looks at his mates and gestures for them to give you some more space so you can calm down.
They all do as he says, except Tae. He lingers in the doorway, his piercing eyes flickering between you and Jimin, thinking.
The two men exchange a meaningful glance. Jimin gives him a reassuring smile and nods his head as if to say “There’s nothing to worry about. I got this.”
Tae gives a slight nod back and turns to leave, throwing one last look at you.
Jimin sees the hint of distrust hidden in that look. He files it away for later.
Turning his attention back to you, Jimin looks at the tub and thinks of a solution.
“You don’t have to get in the tub, okay? We can just...” Jimin opens the cupboard under the sink and takes out a handful of washcloths.
“Like this, see?” He dips one of the cloths in the water, using it to wipe down his face.
“Is that okay?” he asks.
You scan his face. Those big brown eyes are full to the brim with kindness, as if you didn’t just hurt him moments ago.
You nod.
Jimin smiles so big it almost hurts his cheeks, heart swelling as you hesitantly hold your hand open. He puts another cloth in your waiting palm.
“Okay, here’s the soap, shampoo, conditioner. You can wash your face with this. Use whatever you want, okay?”
You look at him, trying to convey with your eyes what your mouth can’t say. He stays there for a moment, sitting with you on the tile, answering your every question with just his expression.
It’s okay. You’re safe here. No one is going to hurt you. You can trust me. I understand you.
Breaking from his reverie, Jimin gets up and moves to leave.
“I’ll give you some privacy,” he says, swinging the door closed.
You shoot forward and grab the knob just before it shuts.
Jimin jumps a little, whipping back around. There’s confusion on his face, then understanding.
“Okay, we’ll leave it open just like this. I’ll be just outside if you need anything, okay?”
You feel the tension release from your chest, and nod back.
Another warm smile, and then he disappears into the next room.
He’s not going to lock you in. Another impossible realization.
Turning around, you stare at the full tub. Your heartbeat skitters a little, but you take a step towards it anyways.
When you dip your fingertips in the clear water, you expect it to be scalding, or cold enough to numb, but it’s neither. The water is warm and calm, it doesn’t burn, it doesn’t sting.
Another breath releases from your lungs.
You use the cloth and soap to wipe down your whole body, shedding your dirty clothes and tossing them aside. Soon the tub is cloudy from the dirt on the washcloth. You even dip your hair into the water and use a little shampoo to get some of the grime out.
You sit there and wash yourself until the water turns cold. Using the counter to steady yourself, you slowly come to a stand, even though your legs are aching.
The sight in front of you is enough to shock you into silence again.
You can’t remember the last time you saw your reflection. You wish you weren’t seeing it now.
The person in the mirror is ugly and pathetic. Her short hair is a mangled mess. Haphazardly cut with a pair of dull scissors, it sticks out in all different angles. Her eyes are blank and lifeless, red-rimmed and surrounded by dark circles. There’s a large, hideous scar across her left cheek, deep and forked like a flash of lightning.
Her body is weak and repulsive. Slouching forward, she’s barely able to hold herself up. She’s covered in scars and marks, all over her legs, her arms, her torso.
You know there are worse scars behind you.
Horrifically entranced, you slowly reach up to touch the scar across her face, your face. Your fingertips meet the textured tissue, and then there’s the pain.
It’s not a physical pain, it doesn’t originate from the scar itself. It’s a pain deep in your chest, spreading and infecting the rest of your body. It maims you, twists your insides, disfigures your soul.
You muffle the silent scream with a hand over your mouth. Knees buckling, you barely have any strength left to keep yourself upright.
You’re barely you. You don’t remember who you were before, but you know it wasn’t this.
A gentle knock on the door.
You immediately stifle any signs of discomfort, snapping the mask back on with frightening accuracy.
Jimin’s arms poke through the gap in the door. He sets a bundle of clothes on the counter.
“Here you go," his pleasant voice says. “Please let me know if they’re comfortable enough.”
You wait a good twenty seconds before you reach for them. A warm green sweater and soft cotton pants.
You hurriedly slip them on to hide your disgusting body.
Leaning closer to the door, you try to hear beyond the wood. Hushed voices, muted footsteps.
“Ready, love?” a smooth voice sounds from just behind the door.
You flinch away, trying your best to make your hair look less unkempt.
It’s Jin who cautiously swings the door open, greeting you with an affectionate smile.
“Much better, hmm?” he says.
You manage a curt nod, following him with your head down to another room.
It’s the room from earlier, the one with the massive bed. The rest of them are here waiting, muttering quiet words until you arrive. Then they go silent and set their eyes on you, asking a question you can’t understand.
Why are they all looking at you? You don’t like it, not at all. People who look like them shouldn’t look at someone like you. You’re wrong, inside and out.
They all notice the change. Now your eyes are trained on the ground, head bent and shoulders folding in on yourself like you wish you would disappear.
Jin ushers you towards the humongous bed, encouraging you to settle in under the covers. He tucks the comforter around your body, fluffing the pillows behind your head.
“There, nice and cozy,” he says, sounding satisfied for the time being. “Rest up, okay love? You’ve been through a lot.”
Why are they talking to you like that? You’re disgusting. They should be throwing you out on the streets to fend for yourself like a common rat.
The small dark-haired man kneels down next to you. He hands you a mug of steaming amber liquid, using the bed sheets to shield your hands from the hot surface.
“This should settle your stomach,” he says.
While Jimin was getting you cleaned up, Yoongi and Jungkook were hard at work cooking up a tincture for your nausea. Essence of lavender to help you sleep, peppermint to refresh your throat, a little ginger to ease your stomach, and some of Yoongi’s highest-quality potions to replenish your nutrients. And, of course, Jin stirred in a copious amount of honey to sweeten it up.
You hold the cup in your hands like it’s a ticking time bomb.
Yoongi looks at his mates in confusion and concern, not sure what to do. Jimin catches his gaze, and gestures wildly with his hands. He exaggeratedly mimics holding the cup and taking a sip, and then Yoongi understands.
He gently takes the mug from your hands and holds it up to his nose.
“Let me check if it’s too hot for you,” he says, blowing off some of the steam and taking a long sip. He makes sure to swallow with audible emphasis.
“Okay, it should be good,” he says, handing it back to you.
This time you hold it close to your chest like it’s a precious gem, slowly sipping away at the frothy liquid.
They all look at each other with a relieved, triumphant expression.
Namjoon steps forward and leans down to level his face with yours.
“There’s water for you over there,” he gestures to a table in the corner, complete with a pitcher and cup. “And the bathroom is the next door over.”
You nod to show your appreciation, still avoiding eye contact.
Jin enters your field of vision again.
“Do you think you can hold down some meds?” he asks. It’s sincere, no seeming deception behind it.
But you still shake your head vehemently. You don’t want anymore pills. In fact, you don’t want to see another pill ever in your life.
“Okay, love,” he says, smiling again. “Just rest up for me. For us.”
You have no idea what he means by that, but you sink into the pillows anyway.
One by one they filter out of the room, casting a last look at you before they leave.
You wish they wouldn’t. Their eyes seem to leave even more marks on your skin.
The door starts to swing shut. Then someone mutters something, and it stops just before it closes completely.
Footsteps recede, silence settles upon the room.
You manage a few more sips from the steaming mug, eventually setting it aside. The bed is soft and comfortable, but you can’t bring yourself to lie down.
You sit there, watching shadows dart across the wall, for hours.
a/n: thanks so much for reading!! if you enjoyed it please leave a comment on what you thought of the story/any questions it would mean the world to me!! and if you’re feeling extra generous, please reblog with tags it helps to spread the story around, thank you!! 💖
#bts ot7#bts x reader#bts ot7 x reader#bts hurt/comfort#bts angst#bts fluff#bts fanfic#bts soulmate au#bts slow burn#bts supernatural au#kim seokjin#min yoongi#jung hoseok#kim namjoon#park jimin#kim taehyung#jeon jeongkook#Bangtan ot7#bts x female reader#ot7 x reader
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Summary: Charlie discovers the Winchester boys to be struggling with keeping the bunker tidy, looking after themselves and being able to do their job simultaneously. Luckily she has a friend who’s from a Hunter family that is in need of work and can help them with research. Or so she thought that’s what her job would be. When Dean sees your more domesticated side, his head won’t stop swimming with all the wrong ideas.
Enemies to Lovers - Smut - Slow Burn - Ongoing Series
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8 pt 1
Chapter 8 pt 2
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
TBC...
(Photos from Pinterest)
#dean winchester#dean winchester smut#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean x reader#dean x y/n#dean x you#dean winchester x reader smut#dean winchester x you smut#dean x female!reader#dean smut#supernatural dean#deanwinchester#dean#dean winchester enemies to lovers#slow burn#dean Winchester slow burn#i'm not your f*cking maid#inyfm#whimsyfinny
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Fresh Blood Part 1
Aaron Hotchner x fem!reader
Criminal Minds x Supernatural
Summary: You finally meet the consequences of your actions through an old friend, How's the BAU going to react?
Content warning: Violence, injuries, and blood description, a little angst.
“Hey Handsome, I’m heading out, Do you need something before I leave?” You asked while peeking your head through his office’s half-open door.
Hotch frowned at you and took a glance at his watch looking surprised.
“No, thank you, I’m just about to leave as well.”
“So, what if we stop for dinner before heading home?, you know, just in gratitude for that coffee back in Minnesota.” You said feeling a little bold.
Hotch took a second to think about it, everything inside him wanted to say yes, but decided against it. Maybe it wasn’t the right time.
“I think it’s better if you thank me by letting me walk you to your car, it’s late.” He remarked.
“Fine, your loss, Hotchner.” You simply said shrinking your shoulders.
You both walked to the elevator, chatting about how your day went and finally saying goodbye when you arrived at your car.
“You sure you don’t want some delicious dinner in my favorite restaurant? Last chance.” You squint your eyes at him. “I’m not getting any younger.”
“Maybe next time.” You nodded and waved goodbye, and before you could start your car, you heard a voice calling your name. “See you tomorrow morning.”
“Sure thing, Boss.”
—-
Sleep never came, you were rolling on your bed from side to side, and nothing felt comfortable. But a peculiar sound caught your attention and you couldn’t tell where it was coming from.
You felt the need to investigate and your hand instinctively reached for the gun under your pillow, you decided to leave your room with precaution and that’s when you felt something was off quickly realizing your living room’s window was open.
¿Who was skilled enough to access your window into a fifth-floor building?
Walking with a shade of concern, you checked the devil’s trap under your mat, but it was intact, and the salt on your window was unbroken. With your non-dominant hand, you reached for your hidden silver knife from under the coffee table, empty, the knife was nowhere to be found.
It wasn’t a demon, a ghost was immediately crossed off the list, no shapeshifter, and thinking about werewolves and vampires was absurd.
That can only mean one thing.
The weight of a strong hand on your gun blocking you from shooting, caught you off guard, and the blade of a knife in your back kept you in place. “The security in your building sucks, they let anyone in.”
That was the last thing you heard before everything went black.
—
You woke up with a sharp pain on the back of your head, trying to move your hands to help ease the pain, you realized they were tied behind the back of a chair, and so were your legs.
That’s when everything hit back, someone broke into your house.
“Uh uh, there’s no way you can get out of those knots, I tied you myself.” A man came into your sight, and fuck you knew who he was, you had help on his arrest. And to say help was modesty, you made it happen.
“Gordon.” You whispered.
“So you know who I am.”
“How do you get out?”
“The Winchesters are not the only ones with connections.”
“Listen, they caught you with illegal weapons, there’s nothing I could’ve done to help you out.” Gordon’s hand caught your face with roughness as he crept closer to you.
“You think I’m here for that? To get revenge?” Your eyebrows frown with confusion. “I want to know where Sam Winchester is.”
“Who?”
“Sam Winchester.” Pure hatred came when he pronounced your friend’s name.
“Again, who?” You said with a challenging expression. “I don’t know who that is.” If any member of the BAU could’ve heard you taunt the man, they would immediately take back your batch.
“They did mention your stubbornness.” He laughed.
“What? That’s not even one of my best qualities.”
“I’m going to ask one more time, and this time you’re leaving the sarcasm behind and telling me the truth, or you’ll regret it.” He threatened. “Where is Sam Winchester?”
“I don’t know who Sam Winchester is.” You stated.
A hard slap made you turn your head to the other side.
“Now you know?”
“Rude, but still.” You maintained a firm voice. “It doesn’t ring a bell.”
He aimed at you again, this time with his closed fist, making your head spin and your ears ring. Just what you needed, a fucking concussion.
That’s how it went for what felt like an eternity. Punch after punch, your vision was blurry, your body was sore and your mouth tasted like blood.
“You are tough, I’ll give you that.” A shiny reflection caught your attention, your silver knife.
“Fuck” “Oh fuck” “Please, let this end right now.” You prayed inside your head.
“One more time, The Winchester brothers.” He yelled while playing with the knife on your skin.
“Winchester, Like the rifle?” You questioned. “Oh, one with bowed legs and the other with that constipated look.”
He looked at you, but you couldn’t decipher his expression.
“You should’ve started with that, Yeah, I know them.”
“Where are they?” He sounded way more tired than you, which is ironic thinking about it.
“That’s what I don’t know, you see, they only happen to call me to put people in jail.”
A sudden throbbing pain traveled through your body when you felt the sharp object being stabbed into your leg, you barely whined, you were too tired.
“Look, I know what you’re feeling, but believe me, he’s willing to talk, we can sit down and address your concerns, I swear, he’s not evil.” You insisted. “I can help you, we can find them, and we can all talk.”
He twisted the knife in your leg and you let out a muffled scream.
“I know what they did to you, you didn’t deserve that, I can help you, I’m a federal agent, we can put a stop to this.
“You think I believe your sudden change of heart? I’m not like the crazy people you profile.”
“You can’t reason with a bitter hunter.” You heard in your head, That was the first thing your father taught you.
“Well, you could’ve fooled me.” You taunted him.
It Might not be the right answer, but there’s no way you can give him what he wants. And just when you thought he was lashing out at you, a ringing cell phone caught his attention.
“Bela? Bela Talbot? I'm on my way.” You overheard him say over the buzzing in your ears.
“Oh, fuck, that fucking bitch.” You mumble
You knew who she was and how tricky she can be, you even got the pleasure of punching her in the face a long time ago.
“Oh, fuck indeed, I don’t need you after all. Don’t worry, after I kill your little friend, I’m going to send somebody to help you out.”
And he left, leaving you to bleed out, with no strength to try to untie yourself, just hoping someone could hear your tired screams through your apartment’s thick walls. As you watch the sunrise through your window, your eyes begin to feel heavy and blackness welcomes you.
~~~
On the other side, Hotch woke up from a restless night, he didn’t know why, but he felt uneasy. He took Jack to school and drove right to work. He parked next to your empty spot and walked straight to his office. It took five minutes for him to realize that his inquietude was because of you, you normally were there before him, his frown deepened.
The voices inside him got louder every time a member of the team arrived at the building and neither of them was you. He finally decided to get out of his office and walked through the bullpen, stopped right in front of your office, and opened the door.
“She hasn’t arrived yet.” JJ said behind him, he almost forgot yours and JJ’s offices were right next to each other.
“I know, I just…” Hotch's mind went blank for excuses.
“You’re worried because it’s the first time she’s late?” He nodded at JJ’s statement. “Yeah, I get it.” She frowned while her fingers played with the papers on her hands. “I called her about four times, but she didn’t pick up.” She confessed.
“I’m going to ask Garcia if she knows something.” Hotch walked away with a hurried pace straight to Penelope’s office.
“Oh captain, my captain!” Penelope said with enthusiasm and he greeted back.
“Think you can help me with something?” Penelope nodded. “Off the record.”
Hotch could only hear Penelope’s fingertips typing against the keyboard, but his mind was anywhere but there, and even knowing your exact location wasn’t enough.
Excusing himself, Hotch left the building leaving questioning faces behind, and drove as fast as he could. He even took the stairs, climbing four steps at a time till he reached your floor. He knocked once, but you didn’t answer, and the second knock didn’t come, cause he took the knob just to find out it wasn’t locked. He quickly opened the door and burst into the house in a rush. After this everything moved in slow motion for Hotchner, he looked at the floor and found a blood pool under your unconscious body. He ran to untie you and quickly moved his hand to feel your pulse, and for the first time since his arrival to your home, he felt his lungs breathing once again. Using that sudden sense of reality, Hotch was able to make the 911 call.
“I'm sorry, I'm sorry.” Hotch said while hugging your fragile body. “Help is on the way, please hold on to me.” A tear drops down Hotch’s face while watching your pale face. “Please, don’t leave me.”
~~~
“Just five minutes more and she wouldn’t make it.” Rossi nodded. “That's what the paramedic said.”
“Aaron, you were just in time.”
“I could’ve done better,” Hotch said leaning into the doorway of your hospital room.
“Why are you blaming yourself like this? This was out of our hands.”
“But, I could’ve stopped it, if I just would’ve left with her.”
Rossi arched his brows with confusion and opened his mouth to argue back, but the brunette agent interrupted him.
“Actually, no one could’ve stopped it.” Both older men looked at her with intrigue. “I mean if someone would’ve done his work correctly, then of course.” She said while rolling her eyes. “But Penelope just told me that the unsub's name is Gordon Walker, caught in Indiana with a whole arsenal of illegal weapons. Our lady here gave the order for his arrest to the local police .”
“Why would she…” Hotch stopped in the middle of his argument, now he was sure this was part of one of your special cases.
“I know, weird, it’s not her jurisdiction.” Emily continued. “But three days ago, Gordon escaped prison, No one saw him leave, and they didn’t even know he was gone before today.”
Hotch nodded got up from the waiting room chairs, and took your room's knob while looking at Rossi. “You and the team find him, I’m going to stay here till she wakes up.”
—-
After twenty-four hours of unconsciousness, your body and mind finally began to cooperate with you, and you managed to let out a little whimper as your limbs started to recover movement. Suddenly a familiar but tired face appeared in front of you.
“Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?” You said with a weak and raspy voice. “Are you my heaven?” You said reaching his face with your hand.
Hotch rolled his eyes but let a little smile escape. “You scared the crap out of me.”
“Well, that’s not a nice thing to say.”
Hotch frowned. “You almost die, I alm-...we almost lose you.” He immediately corrected himself, but it wasn't necessary, you weren't making any sense either.
“I know, I spoke with an angel.”
“Really? What did you talk about?”
“That you and I are going to get married.” He couldn’t hide his chuckle.
“You are on a lot of drugs right now.”
“Believe me, I know, they’re the good ones.” You said while nodding.
“Do you remember anything?” You could see the concern in his face and with a whole minute of delay, you managed to remember why you were there.
“Oh fuck, I need to warn them.” You start to get agitated and the monitor beeped at the rate of your heart race.
“Hey, hey, I’m going to call the nurse, and then we can talk about it.” Hotch tried to reason with you.
“No, you don’t understand, they are in danger.”
“Who?”
#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#dean winchester#fanfic#fem!reader#sam winchester#series#slow burn#supernatural#aaron hotch hotchner#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotch angst#aaron hotch fic#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotch fluff#aaron hotch smut#multifandom writer#the winchester brothers
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The Hunter and the Witch~ Dean Winchester x F! reader
Description: When Dean gets a call from an "old friend" asking for help, old feelings resurface leaving for messy feelings and a complicated hunt.
Warnings: canon violence, feelings of unrequited love, angst, loving someone being difficult, corpses, crime scenes, cursing, mentions of racism, racist ghost truck?
Tag list: @jesllianaquilesrolonsworld , @okayiamkassandra , @fablesrose , @ada--44 , @bonkydarnes , @star-yawnznn , @crazyunsexycool
Word Count: 9,251
Route 666
(Master list, Prev Ch, Next Chapter)
I lean against the expanse of the Impala, letting the bright sun shine over me. It was one of those cold but not cold days, where as long as the sun was hitting you it was perfectly right. Sam is next to me looking over the large map he has laid out on the hood of the car, trying to look for a way around a closed-off road.
I’m glad he knew what he was doing ‘cause my map and geography skills only went so far before I was lost.
Meanwhile, Dean was off to the side, his phone pressed to his ear his brows furrowed whoever he was talking to was clearly telling him something important and maybe shocking.
“Ok. I think I found a way we can bypass that construction just East of here,” Sam informs gaining my attention, “We might even make Pennsylvania faster than we thought.” I nod, taking advantage of his hunched-over figure to ruffle his hair, “Nice work, map man.” He snorts, rolling his eyes as he pushes my arm away playfully.
“Yeah. ‘Problem is, we’re not going to Pennsylvania” Dean points out, closing his phone and looking at it thoughtfully. I look at him confused, “We aren’t…?” He nods, wetting his lips, “I just got a call from an, uh, old friend. Her father was killed last night, think it might be our kind of thing.”
“What?” Sam vocalizes. “Yeah. Believe me, she never woulda called, never, if she didn’t need us” Dean clarifies. Without giving us any more information or even a chance to contemplate or counter his statement he gets in the car, “Come on, are you coming or not?”
The Impala cruises down the expanse of the road, a long beautifully green field on one side and a lake on the other. “By old friend you mean…?” Sam asks the question we were both undeniably thinking. “A friend that’s not new” Dean grumbles.
“Oh! Thanks, genius” I remark, he was being weird and that alone was not helping his case. “‘Said her name’s Cassie huh?” Sam said, trying a different angle, “You never mentioned her…”
“Didn’t I?” Dean remarks. He wasn't very good at hiding this one, the car falling silent in the wake of his stupid answer. He finally huffs, “Yeah, we went out.”
“You mean you dated somebody?” Sam asks with a snort, “For more than one night?”
“Oh come on Sammy we're all adults here, we’ve all dated before” I chime in with a smirk. He turns around in his seat, facing me with an expectant look, “Are we talking about the same person here? Dean doesn't date.” Sam exclaims and I push down the ache of that implication, “And aren’t you the least bit curious.”
“Oh no, I am,” I nod enthusiastically, laughing lightly, “I want all the details. I was just tryna be nice.”
He snickers, turning back to his brother, “You heard her, we want all the details.”
I swear Dean’s eye practically twitches, “Am I speaking a language you’re not getting here? Dad and I were working a job in Ohio, she was finishing up college. We went out for a coupla weeks.”
I want to ask how long ago this was, was it months before his dad disappeared or a year or more ago, but I hold back on my questioning. “And…?” Sam pushes. Dean shrugs slightly.
“Look, it’s terrible about her dad, but it kinda sounds like a standard car accident. I’m not seeing how it fits with what we do,” Sam reasons, “Which by the way, how does she know what we do?”
Dean doesn't answer again, silently shifting in his seat uncomfortably. The realization hits me like a brick, “Oh. My. God,” I lean forward in my seat almost getting choked out by my seatbelt, “You told her! You broke the number one hunting rule! You know, not telling anyone, ever!”
“More than that!” Sam adds, “It’s our big family rule. Number one. We do what we do and we shut up about it. For a year and a half, I did nothing but lie to Jessica, and you go out with this chick in Ohio a coupla times and you tell her everything?!” I try not to think about my own relationships both romantic and not that rarely ever made it past a couple of months before it ended, not only having to lie about being a hunter but a witch too. Dean stays silent, staring straight ahead, “Dean!” Sam yells.
“Yeah. Looks like,” he finally acknowledges. He continues to stare ahead, pressing his foot down harder on the gas pedal. Sam shakes his head, giving his brother his classic bitchface.
“Oh. He had it bad” I laugh leaning back in my seat, ignoring the sinking and stabbing feeling in my heart. I figured I’d have to keep doing so on this hunt.
The office was dark, the bright sunlight not able to stretch upon the large room not even with the help of glass doors. The place could really open a couple of blinds, let the light shine in.
An old white man with an interesting-looking tie, one of those Western ones with the jewel and black tether, talks to two people a man and a woman their backs towards us. And the way Dean pauses, staring at the woman it isn't hard to deduce she's Cassie. She and the older black gentlemen next to her seem to be having some sort of dispute with the old white guy.
Then suddenly both of the men walk away, clearly frustrated, leaving Cassie to stand there herself. She turns around swiftly, and almost like a perfectly curated romance movie she nearly hits Dean only inches separating the two. I didn't even realize he had moved forward in the time we've been standing here.
Just looking at her I could tell why Dean fell for her, she's beautiful more than that. She could be a model with her beautiful long dark curls framing her face, full lips colored red, and big brown eyes. She must have stepped out of a magazine, everything about her screamed perfect down to her perfectly shaped eyebrows and perfect nose. “Dean,” she says, her voice smooth despite the look of slight apprehension.
He nods and grins, “Hey Cassie.” And they just stare at each other. He's looking at her in a way I’ve never seen him look at anyone before even despite the tension that hung in the air, unspoken words from however long ago.
His eyes seem to glimmer, you’d have to be a fool not to see he still has feelings for her, that they never went away in the first place. And that it’s more than just any feelings, he loves her and that is a hard pill to swallow.
He clears his throat, breaking the trance they were both in, “This is my brother Sam. And my friend Y/N.” She smiles at each of us before her gaze reverts to Dean, not that I could blame her in the slightest.
“Sorry ‘bout your dad,” he says.
“Yeah. Me too,” she answers.
Her family home was beautiful and extraordinarily large, it was a bit disturbing. Though maybe that was because it reminded me of my home before moving to Kansas, or at least what I remember of it. We sat in the sitting room on vintage settees, another reminder of that home–my mother would quite like the look of this cozy room.
Cassie finally comes back adorning a tray of tea cups and a teapot along with the little bowl of sugar and a small pouring cup of milk, could she get any more perfect and wonderful? “My mothers in pretty bad shape. I’ve been staying with her. I wish she wouldn’t go off by herself. She’s been so nervous and frightened. She was worried about Dad,” she explains.
“Why?” Dean asks as she takes a seat across from us. He was watching her every move as if dedicating it to memory, I wonder if he’s thinking ‘She moves in the same manner she used to’ or maybe that it changed. Suddenly I was not so okay with sitting between the boys even though that's almost how we always sat when talking to someone on a hunt, as it made it harder for them to fight and made them slightly more comfortable with squishing into sofas with their large frames. But now, being in the middle I could easily watch how he looked at her, studied her.
She skillfully pours tea into each cup, “He was scared. He was seeing things.”
“Like what?” He asked.
“He swore he saw an awful-looking black truck following him,” she responds carefully.
“A truck, did he see a driver?” I ask, diligently accepting the beautiful teacup she handed me. I take a careful sip of the black tea, of course she would know and pick the perfect tea for guests. Does she have any flaws?
“He didn’t talk about a driver,” she answers, “Just the truck. He said it would appear and disappear. And, in the accident, Dad’s car was dented, like it had been slammed into by something big.”
Sam accepts his cup of tea, “Thanks. Now you’re sure this dent wasn’t there before?” And as predictable as Dean was he looked at his cup weirdly before depositing it back on the tray, that man was not a tea person he’d take a coffee or a beer any day. I think the only reason he drank the tea I gave him when he was sick was because he knew how desperate Sammy and I were.
“He sold cars. Always drove a new one. There wasn’t a scratch on that thing,” she explains, “It had rained hard that night. There was mud everywhere. There was a distinct set of muddy tracks leading from Dad’s car…leading right to the edge, where he went over.” She swallows harshly, bowing her head, “One set of tracks. His.”
Dean’s face softens, eyes filling with sympathy, “The first was a friend of your father's?” She nods, “Best friend. Clayton Soames. They owned the car dealership together. Same thing. Dent. No tracks. And the cops said exactly what they said about Dad. He ‘lost control of his car.’”
I force my brain to rid itself of any thoughts of Dean and Cassie's relationship. This was like any other hunt, something weird is going on and we are here to help, nothing more.
It was weird, cars don't just drive off the road like that and then have newly made dents that match another vehicle. “Is there any reason you can think of as to why your father and his partner might've been targets? Competition?” I ask. She shakes her head, radiating certainty, “No.”
“And you think this vanishing truck ran them off the road?” Sam points out.
“When you say it aloud like that…,” she sighs, “listen, I’m a little skeptical about this…ghost stuff…or whatever it is you guys are into.”
Dean huffs, “Skeptical. If I remember, I think you said I was nuts.”
“That was then,” she bites back. Then they fall back into that thing where they just stare at each other, “I just know that I can’t explain what happened up there. So I called you,” she adds, directing her words only to him. I clear my throat, weary of the bubble they seem to have put around themselves, “You were right in calling” I reasoned softly, “It is very strange and on the off chance it isn’t anything supernatural then it was certainly a cover-up.”
Her perfect eyebrows furrow but before she can respond the sound of the front door opening catches all of our attention, a middle-aged white woman enters through and I assume it's her mother. She shared her mother's eye shape and her nose, but the rest of her she must have gotten from her father.
As if we had gotten caught we all rise from the sofa. Cassie goes over to her mother, taking her arm, “Mom. Where have you been I was so…” her mother cuts her off looking at us, “I had no idea you'd invited friends over.”
“Mom, this Dean, a…friend of mine from…college. ‘His brother Sam and friend Y/N.”
“Well, I won’t interrupt you” her mother smiles nervously.
“Mrs Robinson,” Dean says suddenly, “We’re sorry for your loss. We’d like to talk to you for a minute if you don’t mind.” And as if offended she recoils, “I’m really not up for that right now.”
The morning sun is dimmer today, perfect for the scene we were walking upon. The man Cassie was standing with yesterday, Jimmy, was the newest victim. He died in the same way as the others sometime late last night. Cassie was again arguing with the old white man from yesterday. As we approached I could hear his condescending voice, “Close the man road. The only road in and out of town? Accidents do happen Cassie, and that’s what they are. Accidents.”
We stand beside her, Dean speaking up immediately, “Did the cops check for additional denting on Jimmy’s car, see if it was pushed?”
Without missing a beat and without looking away from Cassie the man asks, “Who’s this?”
“Dean and Sam Winchester, Y/N L/N. Family friends. This is Mayor Harold Todd” She replies smoothly. This man went from just any old white guy to a powerful old white guy, even worse. And he had two first names, you never trust someone with two first names. Reluctantly Mayor Old Guy answers Dean’s initial question, “There’s one set of tire tracks. One. ‘Doesn’t point to foul play.”
Cassie scuffs, “Mayor, the police, and town officials take their cues from you. If you’re indifferent about…”
He cuts her off, “Indifferent!”
“Would you close the road if the victims were white?” she counters.
Oh. Could she get any more iconic?!
“You suggesting I’m racist Cassie?” He spits, “I’m the last person you should talk to like that.”
“And why is that?” She counters, stepping closer to him.
“Why don’t you ask your mother” he answers before walking away. My jaw drops, what the hell is going on in this town?
I huff, blowing a piece of hair out of my face. I really didn’t want to get dressed, for as much as I’ve been trying to ignore the whole Dean and Cassie situation I was feeling horrible.
I sit on the soft motel bed in nothing but my underwear and a nice white button-down, haven given up on dressing. I feel stupid. Incredibly stupid.
Maybe Sam’s words had gotten to me, maybe I had gotten my hopes up without even realizing it.
He loves someone else, and he’s had for a while. I always thought when you love someone those feelings don’t ever truly go away, there's always a part of you with them. They wind up crossing your mind and you wonder where things went wrong. But I guess I never considered this would also apply to Dean, which is cruel to believe within itself. Which is funny too, all these years I’ve spent loving him…But Sam was right he didn’t date so I guess I assumed he never fell for anyone during his countless one-night stands.
I know death is cruel but maybe love is tied with it. Because I feel like someone took my heart and ran with it, leaving me with this void in my chest and an ache so intense that it throbs in its place. It was stupid to think I had a chance to begin with. I knew not to believe I had one in the first place, but somewhere along the line I had completely forgotten about any of that. So much for listening to my past self, if I had maybe I wouldn't be feeling so damn bad.
But I couldn't be mad. Cassie was wonderful in every possible way and you don't need to know her for long to realize that. They seemed perfect for each other really. She was feisty and had no issue putting someone in their place, which I quite admired, and I know Dean could use that every now and then. If she was a jerk I’m sure I’d have no issue disliking her, but she wasn’t! She was impossible to dislike, and it would be horrible of me to hate her just because she harbors feelings for someone that I love or the fact that he loves her back. That wasn't her fault, it was neither of their faults.
Loving someone has to be the hardest thing one could do.
I get up from the bed and put on my skirt. I couldn't sit here forever, the boys would come knocking and I wouldn't have a good excuse as to why I’m in a mood. Quickly I check myself in the mirror, at least I didn’t cry which means I don't gotta redo my makeup, even if it was minimal to begin with.
How do you stop loving someone? I could use that answer.
I knew I loved him for a long time, too long. But I suppose I didn’t realize just how bad it had gotten, how much it had flourished and I had never expected that to be possible. I love him.
I love him and it hurts so much.
How many times did I have the opportunity to tell him? It had to be in the hundreds. Maybe it was better that I didn’t, he loves someone else and I should be happy for them. I am happy for him. He deserves to be loved and be able to love. Yes, I am happy.
I approach the two older men having lunch, focusing on the wet ground and the wholesomeness that is them eating on a pier. “Hi, sorry. Are you Ron Stubbins?” I ask, taking the lead. I needed to throw myself into the work, I needed the distraction. The older man nods looking at us confused, his black cap bobbing with his head. “You were friends with Jimmy Anderson?” Dean follows up.
“Who are you?” Ron responds with, sitting up straighter. He was sizing us up, skeptical of us, which he had every right to be. “We’re Mr. Anderson’s insurance company. We’re just here to dot ‘I’s’ and cross ‘T’s’,” Dean explains, flashing his badge.
“And they needed to send three of you?” He counters. I giggle, tilting my head slightly, “Would you prefer me leaving?” I ask sweetly. And as predictable as men can be he drags his eyes across my body before shaking his head, “No. No. That won’t be necessary.” I ignore the dirty feeling that washes over me and sticks to my bones like a new layer of skin, it was necessary to do that because now he won’t bother questioning us anymore on that topic.
“We were just wondering, had the deceased mentioned any unusual recent experiences?” Sam questions, getting back on topic. Reluctantly Ron looks away from me to look at the man who questioned him, “What do you mean, unusual?”
“Well visions, hallucinations” He elaborates.
“We’re working with local psychologists to broaden our questioning and research,” I explain, trying to clear the confusion from his face, “It’s all very standard.”
“What company did you say you were with?” Ron counters. Maybe he was more on guard than I thought. “All National Mutual” Dean answers smoothly, “Tell me, did he ever mention seeing a truck? A big black truck?”
“What the hell ‘you talking about?” Ron exclaims, “‘You even speaking English?”
Wow, what a lovely guy.
“Son this truck, a big scary monster-looking thing?” Ron's friend suddenly says.
“Yeah actually, I think so” Dean answers. The man hums to himself in thought, please let this interaction be useful. “You’ve heard of something like that?” I ask the man. “I have,” he nods, not bothering to elaborate.
“You have. Where?” Sam pushes.
“Not where,” he finally answers, “When. Back in the ‘60s, there was a string of deaths. Black men. Story goes, they disappeared in a big, nasty, black truck.”
“They ever catch the guy?” I ask. He shrugs, “Never found him. Hell, not even sure they really looked. See there was a time, ‘this town wasn’t too friendly to all its citizens.”
“Thank you” Sam nods.
We walk away, heading back to the Impala. “Well, it seems like history is repeating itself,” I began, “From the lack of investigation and racism down to the–”
“Truck,” Dean says, finishing my sentence. “Keeps coming up doesn’t it?” Sam adds.
“You know, I was thinking. You heard of the Flying Dutchman?” Dean asks.
“Yeah, a ghost ship, infused with the Captian’s evil spirit. It was basically part of him” Sam answers, explaining the lore. Dean nods, “So what if we’re dealing with the same thing? You know, a phantom truck, an extension of some bastard’s ghost, re-enacting past crimes.”
“The victims have been black men” Sam continues the theory. I half-shrug, “I don't know. The town has to have more than a handful of black people, but it only seems to be going after specific people. It’s practically targeting those connected to Cassie and her family. I’m sure there’s some deeper link there.”
“That’s why I think it’s more than that,” Dean says.
“All right. Well, you work that angle, go talk to her,” Sam tells his brother specifically, clearly playing matchmaker. “Yeah, I will,” Dean agrees.
“Oh, and you might also wanna mention that other thing” Sam noted, a playful smile on his lips. Always the meddler. “What other thing?” Dean asks, either genuinely lost or faking it. “The serious, unfinished business?” Sam elaborates. I huff a laugh, “Yeah, seriously Dean it's so painfully obvious. Just talk to the girl.” It pained me to even suggest that, to motivate him in such a way but I want him to be happy, and if that means being with her then so be it.
Dean stops just as we reach the car, going obstinately silent. Sam huffs a laugh this time, “Dean, what is going on between you two?”
“All right, so maybe we were a little more involved than I said,” he finally admits. I give him a pointed look, “Yeah…that was obvious.”
He huffs, “A lot more. Maybe. And I told her our secret, about what we do. And I shouldn’t have.”
“Ah look man, everybody’s gotta open up to someone sometime,” Sam reasons, being a little too understanding compared to how we were only yesterday. “Yeah I don’t,” Dean argues, “It was stupid to get that close. I mean, look how it ended.”
I smile at him softly, hoping any sadness is concealed far behind my eyes, and I realize Sam is giving him the same look except he’s nearly beaming. “Would you both stop!” he shouts. But we don't because this is a side of Dean we’ve never seen before, and it is beautiful even if it's heartbreaking for me. “Someone blink or something!” he exclaims, throwing his hands up.
“You loved her,” I say softly, the gape in my chest deepening at the verbal declaration. Saying it aloud was so much worse. “Oh God,” he groans, turning to the Impala. “You still do!” I call after him.
“You were in love with her, but you dumped her,” Sam states, connecting the pieces. Dean goes silent, staring at the ground, then carefully glances at his brother before reverting his eyes. “Oh wow. She dumped you.”
I have to stop myself from taking in a sharp breath, there was a lot to this he wasn’t telling us. But why would she break up with him if she still has feelings?
“Get in the car” Dean demands, done being “emotional” and open, “Get in the car!”
Sam hands me my hot chocolate, but not even the sweet treat or the soft snow falling just outside can lift my mood. It makes me feel a little better but it does not fix my heart. Dean didn’t come back last night and I know it’s because he spent the night at Cassie’s. I’m happy they worked things out and hopefully had a wonderful night but again it does not fix my heart.
I held the cup tighter, welcoming the immense warmth it brought to my frozen hands as we stepped out of the small coffee shop. The air was crisp yet gentle as the light fluffy snowflakes descended onto us, the cold flakes collecting in my hair. A small smile graced my face, maybe it was making me feel better. I like the cold, preferred it even, I was cozy in my thick turtle neck and my favorite fleeced-lined jacket.
Sam and I walk in comfortable silence side by side, sipping from our cups and basking in the scenery of the unexpected snow. It was early May in Missouri, it really shouldn’t be snowing but I suppose if it could snow here a little in April then early May couldn't be that weird. Plus it was a light snow that likely wouldn't even stick. But the calming scenery is cut in half by an ambulance that speeds past us, sirens blaring. We share a questioning look but ultimately ignore it until two cop cars rush past us heading the same way. That we can’t ignore. With another shared look, we follow after the sirens.
I look out at the macabre scene, the yellow caution tape not having stopped me from investigating thanks to the use of a fake ID. The body had been bagged after countless photos were taken, but the blood of Mayor Todd still stains the streets. It was a gruesome scene, arguably worse than the others in this case his organs squished out like roadkill and, truthfully, that’s what he had become.
“L/N” Sam calls out from just a few feet behind me. I turned around swiftly, the snow whirling around me, Dean stood next to his brother. He came.
I walk over to the two boys, watching Dean’s clear expression of shock masked by annoyance, “‘You gonna ask me a bunch of questions too?” he asks. I look at him confused, “...no” I drag out slowly. His face seems to relax slightly, something unrecognizable passing in his eyes, “Good,” he nods.
“I already know you made up–made out” I add, his face drops, “Anyways, crime scene,” I point behind me.
“Every bone crushed. Internal organs turned to pudding,” Sam explains the case, catching his brother up, “The cops are all stumped, it’s like something ran him over.” The wind picks up again, swirling the snow in its own private storm, the cold will help with the case as it preserves the body longer. “Something like a truck?” Dean asks, gaining his footing in the case.
“Yeah, except of course there’s no tracks” I answer. He nods, rubbing a hand down his jaw and I have to force my eyes away from the movement, “What was the Mayor doing here anyway?”
“He owned the property. Bought it a few weeks ago” Sam says referring to the building site.
“But he’s white, doesn’t fit the pattern,” Dean points out. Sam nods, “Killings didn’t happen up on the road. That doesn’t fit either.”
I shove my hands into my pocket, taking a quick look back at the crime scene before turning back to the boys, “Then it seems like this case is one of revenge.”
I shuffle through the papers in front of me, glad that I was sent to do research at the town's main library rather than be at the newspaper office with the boys and Cassie. She was probably looking at him all sweetly and being a kind person, and I did not wish to see the loving way they looked at each other. And if avoiding that meant having my nose in dusty boxes of court records then that was okay.
I pull out my phone calling Sam directly instead of Dean, the phone rings a couple of times before he picks up, “Hi” I greet, “I got some info.”
The line goes quiet for a second before I hear his voice, “Alright you're on speaker.”
“Ok, so,” I start, balancing my phone between my ear and my shoulder as I look over the papers, “I have courthouse records here, and according to them Mr and Mrs Mayor bought an abandoned property. The previous owner was the Dorian family who owned it for, like, 150 years.”
“Dorian?” Dean repeats back. “Yes.”
His voice grows quieter but still in range enough for me to hear, “Didn’t you say the Dorian family used to own this paper?” he asks someone else in the room. “Along with everything else around here. Real pillars of the town,” Cassie answers. “Right, right” Dean responds followed by the clicking of keys.
“You got something there?” I ask, readjusting my phone.
“Think so” Sam mumbles, seemingly focused on whatever was happening over at the office.
“This Cyrus Dorian. He vanished in April of ‘63. The case was investigated but never solved. It was right around the time the string of murders was going on back then,” Dean informs, adding more information to what that man yesterday had told us.
“Well to add to that information, the Dorian place seemed to be in really bad shape when the Mayber bought it,” I add, “He bulldozed the place.”
“Mayor Todd knocked down the Dorian place?” Dean asks, presumably, Cassie. “It was a big deal” she answers, “One of the oldest houses left. He made the front page.” I huff a breath, everything connecting yet leaving so many questions at the same time. “You got a date, Y/N?” Dean calls back.
“Um,” I hum shuffling the papers around and reading over the words quickly, “‘3rd of last month.” The line goes quiet again the only sound ringing back being the sharp noise of fingers on a keyboard, “Mayor Todd bulldozed the Dorian family home on the 3rd,” Dean finally responds, “The first killing was the next day.”
Pouring the boiled water into the mug I take a quick look back, Dean kneels in front of the shaken-up Cassie rubbing her knee softly and looking at her with pure determination and adoration. I swallow roughly looking back at the mugs in front of me, nearly overspilling and burning myself.
This was not the time to grieve a love that never happened. Cassie called Dean afraid, having seen the black truck. We were here to help, I was making a soothing herbal tea for her and her mother to calm the nerves.
Finishing with the mugs I carefully carry them into the sitting room. Sam takes one from me, gently handing it to her mother. I hand the mug to Cassie, her shaky hands accepting and rattling the cup, Dean immediately moves to sit at her side but it does not stop his protectiveness if anything it amplifies it; he practically radiates it. “Maybe you should throw a couple of shots in here,” she says, half joking.
I huff a laugh, “Well while the effects of alcohol do have the capabilities of easing the central nervous system, when the effects wear off your body will be jolted back from its depressive state which would really only make you feel worse, more anxious as well as stressed.”
She gives me a half, almost awkward, smile before taking a sip from her mug. Did I say too much? Why didn’t someone stop me? Someone should’ve just cut me off, especially if I wasn’t helping.
“You didn’t see who was driving the truck,” Sam says suddenly, pulling the awkwardness out of the air. “It seemed to be no one. Everything was moving so fast. And then it was just gone,” she explains, “Why didn’t it kill us?”
“Whoever was controlling the truck wants you afraid first,” Dean answers. This would explain why at least one of the victims had seen it and truthfully thought they were going mad. “Mrs Robinson,” Sam began, “Cassie said that your husband saw the truck before he died.” Mrs Robinson doesn't answer, seemingly lost in her mind as she shakes. “Mom?” Cassie says carefully, worry laced in her voice.
The older Robinson shakes her head nervously, “Oh. Martin was under a lot of stress. You can’t be sure about what he was seeing.”
“Well after tonight I think we can be reasonably sure he was seeing a truck. What happened tonight, you and Cassie are marked. Ok?” Dean snaps, “Your daughter could die. So if you know something now would be a really good time to tell us about it.”
“Dean…” Cassie warns. But her mother's face contorts in emotion, something in her breaking, “Yes. Yes, he said he saw a truck.”
“Did he know who it belonged to?” Sam asks, taking a seat across from the woman. “He thought he did,” she answers cryptically. “Who was that?” Dean pushes. Her eyes get watery and she sinks into herself, “Cyrus. A man named Cyrus.”
My gaze flickers to the boys, we are all thinking the same thing, I look back at her, “By any chance was it Cyrus Dorian?” I ask carefully. Dean pulls out a newspaper from inside his coat, handing it to the woman. She doesn't shake her head or nod only replying with, “Cyrus Dorian died more than 40 years ago.”
“How do you know he died, Mrs Robinson?” Dean asks softly, “The papers said he went missing. How do you know he died?”
She hesitates, her mouth agape like a fish out of water or in reality that of a person who got caught, “We were all very young,” she says, “I dated Cyrus a while, I was also seeing Martin…in secret of course. Interracial couples didn’t go over too well back then. When I broke it off with Cyrus and when he found out about Martin, I don’t know, he, changed. His hatred. His hatred was frightening.”
“The murder,” Sam voices.
Her voice wobbles, “They were rumors. People of color disappearing into some kind of truck. Nothing ‘ever done,” she swallows shifting in her seat, “Martin and a…Martin and I, we were gonna be, uh, married in that little church near here, but last minute we decided to elope as we didn’t want the attention.” She pushes her short hair out of her face, stressed. “And what became of Cyrus?” I ask.
Endless tears fall down her cheeks, “The day we set for the wedding, was the day someone set fire to the church. There was a children’s choir practicing in there. They all died.” I suppress the gasp that wishes to leave my lips, the room seems to dim with the information. What was meant to be a beautiful day was soiled by the blood of innocents.
“Did the attacks stop after that?” Sam asks softly, careful of her fragile mindset.
A sob escapes from her chest, “No! There was one more. One night that truck came for Martin. Cyrus beat him terribly. But Martin, you see, Martin got loose. And he started hitting Cyrus and he just kept hitting him and hitting him.”
“Why didn’t you call the cops?” Dean pushes. She continues to cry, “This was forty years ago. He called on his friends, Clayton Soames and Jimmy Anderson, and they put Cyrus’ body into the truck and they rolled it into the swamp at the end of his land and all three of them kept that secret all of these years.”
“And now all three are gone,” Sam acknowledges. This all confirms the theory of a vengeful spirit. “And so is Mayor Todd,” Dean adds, “Now he said that you of all people would know he is not a racist. Why would he say that?”
“He was a good man,” Mrs Robinson answers, “He was a young deputy back then investigating Cyrus’ disappearance. Once he figured out what Martin and the others had done he…he did nothing, because he also knew what Cyrus had done.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Cassie asks, her voice hard yet full of emotion. I couldn't imagine what was going on in her head, to find out something like this–“I thought I was protecting them. And now there’s no one left to protect,” her mother reasons.
“Yes, there is” Dean counters, fiercely. His green eyes harden with determination as he looks at Cassie.
I sit on the cold hood of the Impala, gently kicking my legs back and forth watching Dean pace in front of me. Sam leans against the car next to me, his arms crossed as he too watches his brother, “Ah, my life was so simple. Just school, exams, papers on polycentric cultural norms…”
I look at him with an amused smile, “I have no idea what that last part is but it sounds fun!” That stops Dean in his tracks for just a half of a second, he points at us, “No it doesn’t. I saved him from a boring existence.”
“Yeah, occasionally I miss boring” Sam reasons. I nod enthusiastically, “Honestly, we have not had a normal day in like months. Kinda miss it.”
Dean brushes our light complaining off, “So this killer truck–”
“I miss conversations that didn’t start with ‘this killer truck’” Sam quips with a dramatic sigh. I failed to hold back my laughter, Dean laughs lightly and for a brief moment, things feel how they used to, “Well this Cyrus guy. Evil on a level that infected even his truck. When he died, the swamp became his tomb, and his spirit was dormant for 40 years.”
“So what woke it up?” Sam asks.
“The construction on his house. Or the destruction,” Dean points out.
“Right. Demolition or remodeling can awaken spirits, make them restless” Sam recalls. His brother hums a ‘yes’, nodding.
“Like that theater in Illinois, ya know?” Sam references, and I in fact had no idea what he was talking about. “And the guy that tore down the family homestead, Harold Todd, is the same guy that kept Cyrus’ murder quiet and unsolved,” Dean adds, bringing it back to the case at hand.
“So now his spirit is awakened and out for blood,” Sam acknowledges.
“Yeah, I guess. Who knows what ghosts are thinking anyway” Dean shrugs.
“Wait, does this mean we have to go swimming in that swamp?” I ask. I mean if we had to salt and burn the bones then we would need said bones which are in a swamp, how nice. Dean smiles at me, I know that look. “No” I warn, pointing at him like an animal that did something wrong. “You said it” he rationalizes.
“Noooo” I whine a pout on my lips, “Do I have to do it alone?”
His wicked smile deepens, “‘Course not, Sammy’s gonna be with you.”
Sam’s shoulders drop, “Man,” he sighs.
Suddenly a familiar figure approaches, her hands tucked into the back pocket of her jeans. Dean stands up straighter, “Hey.” She smiles sadly, “Hey. She’s asleep. Now what?”
“Well, you should stay put, look after her…and we’ll be back. Don’t leave the house,” Dean explains, looking at her in that way that hurts my heart. But she smiles, any worry melting off her face, “Don’t go getting all authoritative on me. I hate it.”
Dean glances back at us, Sam looks down grinning acting as if neither of us could hear the conversation. He turns back to Cassie mumbling something I can't quite make out but whatever it was must have been good because he slowly leans in to kiss her. I drop my head and gaze at the very interesting ground, trying my best to ignore the sound of their intensifying making out. A pang of jealousy, longing, and pain shoots through my chest. If the ground wanted to just open up and consume me now I wouldn’t complain, I’d even help it and just throw myself in it wouldn’t have to work very hard. Sam clears his throat, I look up but Dean just holds out a finger to wait as he brings Cassie even closer.
I drop my eyes again.
Loving someone never hurt so bad. Loving him never hurt so bad.
Was it wrong to love him? Was this always going to be my fate? To see him evermore with other girls, loving them more than he could ever love me.
“You two comin’ or what?” Dean asks. I look up once more and this time his lips aren’t on Cassie.
I tug on the chain again, making sure it's secure, my hands getting wet in the process. I wipe my icky hands off on my jeans as I back away, “Alright he’s good,” I call out to Sam who stands feet away from me, closer to the butt of the pickup Dean was driving. He gives a thumbs up to his brother who begins to move the car forward, the pickup moving slowly in the weight of the heavy truck and water pressure.
We had already gotten it up a lot, but it had gotten stuck on the side of the swamp so we had to readjust its hold to get it the rest of the way up.
The years in the water had diminished it. The old black truck was now more like a rust bucket, remains of the swamp water spilling out from the seams. “All right. A little more…little more,” Sam leads, “All right, stop.”
The engine shuts off and Dean heads to the Impala, he pulls it open rummaging through the various weapons. “Now I know what she sees in you” Sam declares with a snap of his finger, meaning he finally understood what that look in her eyes meant. “What?” Dean asks.
“Come on man, you can admit it. You’re still in love with her” Sam clarifies. I nod even though the implications hurt, “Plus it’s not like no one else knows. So the only person you’re hiding from is yourself.”
Dean looks up from the trunk, “Uhh, can we focus please.”
I purse my lips, “Yeah…focusing has never really been our strong suit…” A container of salt is pressed into my chest, “Hold that” Dean says swiftly.
His expression hardens, all jokes put to rest as he dishes out items, “Gas” he says first, handing the large container to his brother, “Flashlights,” he lists out next filling my empty hand with one.
“Ok, let’s get this done,” he quips, closing the trunk.
We trudge back over to the rusty truck, our flashlights leading our way across the grass. Dean places his hand on the handle and I must wonder how he isn’t grossed out by just the feeling of the flaked paint and rotting metal. He glances at us in a silent ‘you ready?’ We give a nod and he opens the door.
A decaying wet corpse falls out the door and onto the soft grass, a small gush of water following its lead. I leap back like a scared cat, clasping a hand to my mouth and nose the decomposition of the body as well as its marinating in swamp water left a putrid smell. One perhaps worse than anything I've ever smelt before which was saying something considering what I’ve hunted.
“All right let’s get to it,” Dean says. Sam pours the gasoline all over the body, careful not to get it close to us and I jump in with the salt, opening the little latchet to sprinkle the small white crystals over the open-mouthed corpse. The satisfying scratch and flick of a match sounds softly beside me in the quiet night followed by the drop of the matchstick on the body. In mere seconds the remains go up in flames, the warm glow of the fire reflecting on the truck just beside it. I hoped no one would come looking over here with the whirl of smoke twirling above us, the heat powerful enough for me to take another step back.
“Think that’ll do it?” Sam voices, staring down at the burning corpse. But his question is followed by the revving of an engine and two blinding lights pointed at us. Without looking in the direction I knew it was the ghost truck. “I guess not,” Dean quips.
“So burning the body had no effect on that thing?” the younger Winchester asks. “Sure it did. Now it’s really pissed,” Dean responds. I glare at him, “I don't know if this is the time for cool jokes.”
“But Cyrus’ ghost is gone, right Dean?” Sam asks, a hint of panic in his voice as the tuck stares us down. But his brother doesn't answer right away, instead, he starts to walk away, “Apparently not the part that’s fused with the truck.”
I go on my tip toes trying to peak into the truck, maybe we missed something like a severed piece of him that didn’t spill out but before I can vocalize this Sam is calling out to his brother, “Where are you going?” I turn around, catching up to the boys, “Goin’ for a little ride,” Dean answers as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “What?!” Sam and I exclaim in unison, “That’s a horrible idea!” I add. But he ignores our concern, “Gonna lead that thing away. That busted piece of crap, you gotta burn it.”
“How the hell are we supposed to burn a truck, Dean?” Sam asks, voice raising in volume. But being the determined man he is he shrugs, “I don’t know. Figure something out.” He rounds the car, opening the driver's door, “At least let one of us come with you, this is horribly dangerous,” I try to reason.
His eyes move up and down my face, before he settles on my eyes once more, “‘Exactly why you’re not comin’ with.” Before I can come up with a retort on how stubborn he is he settles himself into the car, closing the door behind him. I look to Sam for any support on this but he just stares at the car muttering, “Figure some–something–”
I rack my brain for ideas because Dean wasn’t going to listen and would rather be all hot and stubborn than be reasonable, “An explosion?” I suggest. Sam shakes his head, “No, that wouldn’t work. Parts would go everywhere and everything has to burn.”
I huff, frustrated, “I hate when you’re right.”
Dean reverses the Impala and takes off, the engine revering. As predictable as possible the ghost truck roars after him. I try to rack my brain for more ideas, even if we could suddenly light a truck on fire it would take too long for it to burn completely, “Sam, please tell me you got some idea rolling around in there.” He doesn't answer, lost in concentration with his bottom lip between his teeth.
My phone suddenly rings in my pocket, I pull it out swiftly seeing Dean’s name glowing. I flip it open bringing it to my ear, “You okay?” I say immediately. “Uh…yeah,” He says but I remain not convinced, “what are we doing?”
I look at Sam, panicking slightly, “Um, Sam what are we doing?”
He pulls out his phone, “You gotta give me a minute.” He presses his phone to his ear, “He says to give him a minute, I think he’s callin’ someone.”
“I don’t have a minute!” He half yells. “Dude, I don't know!” I panic, “Just…just don’t die, okay?”
“Trying here sweetheart.” I look back at Sam who has stepped away, I give him a hand motion of ‘please hurry up.’ He nods, coming closer to feed me info, “Ask him where he is.” I pull my phone away from my ear putting him on speaker instead, “Okay, Dean where the hell are you?”
“In the middle of nowhere with a killer truck on my ass!” he exclaims, “It’s like it knows I put the torch to Cyrus.”
“Listen to me, this is important” Sam orders, calmly, “I have to know exactly where you are.” Seemingly taking his advice he goes quiet for a beat, “Decatur Road, about two miles off the highway.”
“Ok. Headed East?” Sam follows up.
“Yes!”
A rattle and a bang followed by skitting noise sounds from the phone followed by cursing, “You son of a bitch!”
“Sam!” I yell, begging him to hurry up. “Ok, uhhh, turn right! Up ahead, turn right.” Again the line falls silent, “You make the turn?” Sam questions softly. My heart beats faster with each silent moment that passes. “Yeah, I made the turn!” Dean yells, “You need to move this thing along a little faster.”
“All right, you see a road up ahead?” Sam asks.
“No!... Wait. No, yes, I see it.”
“Ok turn left.”
“Wha..?” Dean half says before he goes quiet again the only sound coming from the line being more screeching and shuffled movement. “All right, now what? He finally responds.
“You need to go seven-tenths of a mile and then stop,” Sam explains. I looked at him strangely, noticing he wasn’t on the phone anymore, but what the hell was he talking about? “Stop?” Dean voices.
“Exactly seven-tenths Dean” Sam repeats.
“God, I hope you know what you’re talking about,” I tell the man beside me. “Me too” he mumbles over the sound of his brother repeating the words ‘seven-tenths.’ I look at him my mouth agape, “You wha–”
“Dean, you still there?” He cuts me off, focusing on his brother again. “Yeah,” Dean responds.
“What’s happening over there?” I ask, not knowing was killing me. “It’s just staring at me,” he answers carefully, “what do I do?”
“Just what you’re doing, bringing it to you,” Sam replies.
“Wha–” Dean began before cutting himself off, the line going quiet for the umpteenth time, “Come on. Come on,” he mumbled quietly but just loud enough for the phone to pick it up. My heart thumps in my chest, anticipation and fear running through my veins as well as something else from those two stupid words–something had to be wrong with me to find that hot now of all times.
The line is silent, for one beat, then another, then another…I grip my phone tighter, “Dean? Dean, are you there? ‘You okay?”
“Where’d it go?” he responds with a mix of shock and confusion. “Dean, you’re where the church was,” Sam explains. “What church!” he freaks.
“The place Cyrus burned down. Murdered all those kids,” Sam clarifies.
“There’s not a whole lot left,” Dean responds.
“Church ground is hallowed ground, whether the church is still there or not. Evil spirits cross over hallowed ground, and sometimes they’re destroyed, so I figured, maybe, that would get rid of it,” Sam explains. I hit his arm, “That was a hunch?!”
Dean adds in with the lecturing, “Maybe? Maybe!! What if you were wrong?!”
“Huh,” Sam hums, “Honestly, that thought hadn’t occurred to me.”
I glare at him sharply, hitting his arm again as I say, “You’re too sassy for your own good.” He laughs, a boyish grin on his face.
I wait in the back, Sam in the driver seat for Dean to say his goodbyes. I liked the back seat, more now than ever because being in the front would mean being able to see out the side mirror and watch Dean kiss the woman he loves and say a goodbye I was sure he didn’t want.
Life was being really unfair and uncool.
I bury my nose in my new book, it would be better to just escape into this world than have to deal with my feelings here in the real world. My feelings in the real world were not fun, they were depressing and hurt…a lot. But no amount of ink on paper formed into beautifully crafted words could fill the gaping hole in my heart, still, I tried as there was nothing else to do.
What is worse is knowing there will never be a chance for me to be loved by him, at least not in the way I do, because there will always be a place in his heart for her. He’ll think of her all the time, dream about her, and perhaps see her in the breeze. His heart belongs to her, and possibly always has.
I needed to accept that. The sooner I did the quicker the pain would go away. I couldn't go on believing I had a chance I needed to huff the flame out now.
No more hope. No more love. We’re friends, always have been, and always will be. That will have to be enough. I couldn’t love him anymore, not if it meant feeling this much pain. I wouldn’t accept his touches anymore for they gave me more hope than I’d like to admit.
No. I was wrong.
Worse of all is knowing that I can’t just stop loving him. Let it be the Gods' fault or the stars or whatever it is I’m meant to believe in but my heart has long been his and always will be. I could never love someone the way I love him, I wasn’t capable of that. Let it be that our love was written in the star's constellations that it was undecided by me or him for my love had to transcend the binds of that nonsense.
I loved him and he did not love me and maybe it was that which I had to accept because to stop loving him would mean to stop my heart from beating. Though even then I suspect not even the afterlife could keep me from my eternal love. And maybe that was pathetic or stupid, especially since he did not care for me in such a way, but it was the truth and no one has ever claimed truth to be a beautiful thing.
I’m brought back to reality with a bump. When did we leave and start driving? I look out the window, we had already made it to the highway…I look at the boys, but both seem fine. Ok then.
“I like her,” Sam says, and suddenly I wish to be lost back in the state I was in moments ago. I would love not to hear or be a part of this conversation. “Yeah,” Dean replies, seemingly just to get his brother to stop.
“You meet someone like her, doesn’t it make you wonder if it’s worth it? Putting everything else on hold, doing what we do?” Sam asks innocently perhaps trying to get him to understand what he had felt with his girlfriend. But something flickers in his face and suddenly he’s making eye contact with me in the rearview mirror, his eyes written in apology as if it just hit him now what all of this was doing to me. It was that puppy dog look.
I smile sadly at him, giving him a curt nod in a silent ‘it’s okay.’ His gaze flickers back to the road.
Dean leans forward pulling sunglasses from the glove box, he puts them on carefully ignoring his brothers' initial question, “Why don’t you wake me up when it’s my turn to drive?” He slouches down in his seat with a sigh. I shake my head, roll my eyes, and go back to my book.
We were leaving Missouri and all would be well, or as well as they could be.
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